#i feel so crazy when i remember this game
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cinellieroll · 15 hours ago
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☆ more random obey me headcanons !
characters: the demon brothers! <3
small note: i am back. and i will disappear once more after this..also i apologize for the VERYYY LATE upload. i am not dead and i wont die until om fandom comes back to life i tell ya 😤😤
cw: none! :p
☆ lucifer:
- occasionaly has thoughts of getting a german shepherd but cerberus would get EXTREMELY PISSED if he did. also another reason why he refuses to let satan keep cats in the house. cerberus will gobble them up in less than a millisecond.
- has a pretty high libido (as if it isn't already obvious in the game..) he really enjoys taking out his stress on you everytime he gets the chance. buckle up buttercup ༎ຶ⁠‿⁠༎ຶ
- one if his biggest secrets is keeping like a few albums of him and his brothers back when they still lived in the celestial realm. he keeps em hidden realll good
- sometimes asks levi or mammon to help him with his D.D.D
- "mammon, help me with this." "levi, why is my screen stuck like this?" "lucifer you paused the video-"
- he likes silk pajamas :3 he also can't STAND sweatpants for some reason.
- once a week, he dedicates atleast an hour or two grooming his own wings and his horns. there's a lot of occasions where he transforms in his demon form for parties and such.
- reads newspaper while taking a shit. guys dont argue with me on this its real.
- he has cold lips but his kisses are always very passionate with you!
- very well mannered everytime he's on the dining table and eating. y'all will never catch him spill a single food on the table or his clothes.
☆ mammon:
- eats with his hands sometimes when he's alone. and if someone ever finds out his excuse is always "so what? sometimes eating food with your hands is a better way to savor the taste." and i completely agree with him
- cleans his jewelry a lot. he wants them dazzling that people will do a double take when they see his mega awesome drip. like "haha yeah yall cant beat me on this baby" type shit
- cooks the BEST beef curry. the level of spice is perfect-o and beel always pesters him to make it.
- during family photos, he's always the one doing silly poses. he does hand stands, he has his ass out on display, he's ON THE FLOOR
- always man spreading in class. like you can literally see him chewing on his pen from across the room with his legs sprawled out
- you know that empty feeling you get after watching a movie? double that and give it to mammon. man takes it HARD especially if it was a sad movie that he watched. he'll feel empty for a gooooddd while
- always breaks his earphones, so when d.d.d airpods came out he got really happy and bought like 6 pairs (he ended up breaking all of them too)
- blasts music like crazy when he works out and lucifer absolutely HATES his music style and thinks it's unsanitary and inappropriate. like ok whatever you old fucking hag
- doesn't close the bathroom door after he uses it LIKE BITCH CLOSE THAT SHIT RN
- follows all of his fan accounts on devilgram ugh my boy <33
☆ leviathan:
- there's just like random times where he'll suddenly remember all of his past cringe phases. and it like appears on the most random times it's actually pissing him off
- always fantasized about creating character designs for simeon ever since he found out he was the creator of TSL
- he has a bad habit of HOLDING IN HIS PISS. yes he holds them in. he developed this habit ever since he got addicted to gaming. luckily for him he's a demon but boy if he was human he would've gotten kidney problems by now.
- levi would never ever admit it but he enjoyed getting spun around by mammon when they were still kids. like mammon grabs his arms then just spins him around and stuff
- sleeps with his headphones on and now he can't sleep without it. he's just like me jujujuju
- he really likes alex g :3
- sometimes he wishes he was a magical pop star girl performing for people on stage because they always look so happy when he watches them
- loves being the little spoon so much. sometimes it's awkward with him when he's the big spoon because he's either trembling or really stiff like a log
- he enjoys kissing your cheeks the most because he's convinced he'll melt if he tries kissing you on the lips
- has a hidden album on his phone of stolen shots of you doing the most random shit ever. eating, sleeping, showering..💀
☆ satan:
- even when it's freezing cold, his feet are always peeking out of his blanket. can't sleep without his bare feet hanging out.
- doesn't need reading glasses but insists on buying them because he thinks it fits the detective aesthetic. unfortunately he loses them a lot and no one knows why
- besides lucifer, satan is very sleek and neat when putting on neck ties
- had a phase where he absolutely despised coffee and tea because he found out lucifer enjoyed it. deep down he knew he enjoyed them too and it'd be one of the reasons for his constant rampages..
- started enjoying lofi music ever since levi introduced him to it.
- out of all the brothers, satan feels the most comfortable crying in front of mammon the most. (can i get some big brother mammon appreciation out here? 😔)
- he's the type to practice his lines in front of the mirror before asking you out on the date! he just wants everything to be perfect for you and yes sometimes he messes up but it's your fault for being too pretty
- worked as a librarian once as a part time job and lemme tell you..sales went high as fuck after that and the manager even BEGGED him to stay for longer. (which he did, as long as he got to have free books :p)
- tried the "which of the seven brothers are you?" quiz and got lucifer.
- is very skilled with the piano and even made a few pieces that reminded him of you <3
☆ asmodeus:
- really enjoys ear piercings and even got one himself!
- owns a clothing brand in the human world and even tried making you the co-owner. it's a really big success and he uses the money to buy you gifts
- can't go a day without kissing you atleast once! he feels like his lips would dry if doesn't get to even leave a peck on you
- does that back arch thing in his room when he's bored 👀
- bought so many makeup products once to the point lucifer banned makeup in HOL for like a month 💀 asmo held a grudge for a while because he was lowkey kinda conscious of his appearance when he'd go outside. especially when he's in front of you! ;((
- second most followed user on devilgram! (top one is diavolo lol)
- if he had to choose a favorite makeup brand from the human world it's either the ones with the cute packaging (ex: flower knows, too faced) or the high end brands like dior
- changes bed sheets like twice a week because it's either he can't stand the feeling anymore or found a new inspo on devilgram
- says he's not easily influenced on buying new things like mammon or levi but the moment he sees something go viral he's already purchasing 10 of them. (and posts it on his feed to gain those likes)
- crop dusts every now and then
☆ beelzebub:
- finds those gross ass thirst trappers who sexualizes food nasty asf and is a big donutdaddy hater
- wins awards from eating competitions a lot and always ALWAYS spoils you and belphie first
- always the viewer in situations where one of the brothers fight w eachother. mans always there for some reason so lucifer always approaches him first when smth happens lol
- sometimes he goes overboard with body sprays
- he likes hand made accessories/jewelry. belphie was the one who made his choker on his everyday outfit and cherishes it everyday
- he thinks tongue piercings are cool but never went out of his way to get one
- buys burger merch or any food merch in general lol
- he was never really the type to care about his own appearance and only did the bare minimum to make himself look presentable. but sometimes he does feel insecure when people get too intimidated by him, especially when it's you.
- "mc, you're not afraid of me right? i won't hurt you. i promise"
- majority of the time he's the one who fixes belphie's bed and cleans his side of the room so lucifer won't get mad at him
☆ belphegor:
- has no shame in stealing pillows from furniture shops and always gets away with it
- unintentionally says the most sassy remarks ever and stares at you when you call him out for it
- being the youngest, he doesn't really need to go shopping for his own necessities because one of the brothers already buys it for him before he can even step out of the house
- when you'd go back to the human world, he'd always gaze up at the stars and wonder how you're doing and if you're getting enough sleep
- always constipated like idk he just seems like the type to only shit once a week lmfao
- one time (or two..or three) he accidentally used a different toothbrush that belonged to one of the brothers because he was half asleep
- hates the feeling of jewelry on him because he thinks it's just in the way. especially hates earrings because it's a nuisance when he sleeps.
- HORRIBLE driver and can't drive for shit. crashed mammon's car once because he fell asleep. and his in defense was because traffic was so long smh
- he can't live without his cardigans. always wears long sleeved shirts unless it's summer season in the devildom and settles for loose shirts. he also has a habit of pulling his sleeves that it nearly covers his whole hand
- very calming singing voice. back when he was still in the celestial realm, a bunch of angel kids would approach him at night, telling him to sing lullabies for them to help them sleep <3
note: had to repost :P ALSO TY FOR 73 FOLLOWERS! hiphiphorey
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shad0wvisi0n · 1 day ago
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Caffeinated Monster
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Summary: SV3 drinks coffee for the first time in order to stay up late for SV4 gaming night, but things take a twist when the power in the studio goes out and a monster hunts in the dark.
Tags: Flashing Art, Body Horror, fluff, angst with happy ending, hurt and comfort
AU Created by @b-r-i-n-g-x and @shygirl4991
ALL ART IS DONE BY BRINGX DO NOT REPOTS
Shout out to our other Assistants @merp0515 @anartisticalniche Last Chapter Main Fic
Liko tosses and turns, flashes of SV4 injury played in her head every time she closed her eyes. She sits up on the bed letting out a sigh as she runs her fingers through her hair, she turns to see Flor floating asleep next to her. With a small chuckle, she gets up and walks to the kitchen. She groans as she looks around noticing that she used up the last of the coffee last night, the lack of sleep is killing her motivation to continue her experiments. She leans against the counter confused, she never felt this way towards something she created so why was she so haunted. She looks at the front door then to her bedroom door before she makes up her mind, she changes into her usual outfit and checks the time. “It’s not too late, maybe i could pay a small visit and make sure that kid is taking care of his eye,” she knew with SV3 around she wouldn't have to worry about how 4 was doing yet something pulled her to them.
As she gets in her car she rehearses her greeting “Hey ran out of coffee and who needs to buy some when i got you guys!” she lets out a smile before dropping it. Leaning back on the car seat she couldn't understand why these events were bothering her so much, they were just subjects she invented. Just like how she ‘fixed’ Mr Puzzle, the boys were made to please that first project and that's all.  She grabs the steering wheel and stares silently at the road ahead of her, letting out a sigh as she starts the car heading to the studio. SV3 hums letting his hair free of their constraints, he walks over to the kitchen where he hears an upset SV4 in his room. 3 giggles hearing his partner as he grabs a plate from the cabinet, looking at the assortment of snacks the man grabs a couple of SV4 favorites and places them nicely on the plate.  With a hop in his step, he walks to SV4 room with the plate “Hey 4! Got you some snacks and remember not to get too into your games, last time you forgot your pain medication your powers went pretty crazy.” SV4 takes the plate with a small smile before letting out a groan “Look not my fault the boss fight was such a challenge, you know i dont back down!” SV3 shakes his as he opens the door, he turns, staring at the bandaged eye feeling a pang of guilt hit him before he leaves. 
As he closes the door behind him the doorbell rings, confused as to who would be coming over so late he walks over to the front door. He opens the door then shuts it in a panic, the person on the other side of the door was Liko. 3 looked at his face and frowned, it was close to his normal time of sleeping meaning any trace of his iconic make up was gone. He bites his lips as he awkwardly opens the door hoping Liko doesn't ask about his face, after all someone as fashionable as SV3 isn't a fan of walking around certain people with a naked face. Liko gives him an annoying look “Can feel how welcomed I am, can I come in?” SV3 moves aside to let Liko in “I’m so sorry Ms. Liko, you caught me by surprise. You don't normally come at this hour.” He follows the scientist to the kitchen where he watches her search their cabinets. Liko sighs as she peeks at SV4 room “He taking care of that eye?” Hearing the question 3 turns looking at the yellow door, he smiles softly as he nods “Yeah, he has been good at that. Only thing he isn't good at is walking around without hitting himself against everything.” 3 frowns staring at the door, if he didnt get so angry and left the studio the way he did then SV4 wouldn't have gotten hurt. SV3 felt the sting of his tears wanting to escape, Liko turned and noticed 3’s face. She leans over the counter and pats his head. “We didn't know what that place had…only one who did was Mr puzzle, you could always do what SV4 does.”  Liko lets out a chuckle, SV3 smiles at the woman's chuckle as he turns to her “SV4 really is angry at him…I just worry about him, I don't care so much about Mr puzzle. 4 just seems different now, I can't help blaming myself for this…” 
Liko lets out a sigh as she pulls back, she doesn't need to comfort him there is no need he is just an experiment. As she continued her search in the cabinet she couldn't help herself “Look, it's only part of being alive that these things happen. Science knows that I have done a lot of stupid things out of emotions…but mistakes are what helps you grow.” She grabs a bag of coffee beans and turns to show she got her prize, SV3 eyes go wide seeing the bag of coffee. He felt his stomach flip at the site, as she put the bag on the counter “Now coffee?” SV3 felt himself break into a sweat seeing the bag, he then turned looking at the yellow door. Then turning back to Liko shaking his head in a panic, she tilts her head at his reaction “You’re not a fan of coffee?” SV3 lets out a nervous chuckle as he nods “I dont have the best history of it, I’m sorry Ms. Liko but if you're going to make a cup I should excuse myself.” She watches as he gets up and runs to his room slamming it shut, she stares at the door confused before slowly turning to the yellow door. If she wanted answers it wouldn't hurt to ask, she grabs the bag of coffee and walks to 4’s door knocking on it. 
Why did she even want answers when she thinks about it, she shouldn't get herself involved in their life. They’re experiments, something to please the first project and test her knowledge. Yet here she is watching the yellow door open as she looks down at the injured man, SV4 looks annoyed before his expression changes to one of surprise “Liko?” She shows off the bag of coffee catching his attention, he looks around before stepping out of his room “Not like you to be a friendly neighbor, what do you need? More blood for a test?”  Liko’s eyes go wide as she watches 4 slowly walking trying not to trip over furniture, he sits down in the kitchen staring at her “Or are we going to throw a pity party over me being a pirate, cause if that's what we are doing save it. I get enough puppy eyes from SV3 when I'm doing things outside of my room.”  Liko shakes her head as she walks to the kitchen to start brewing the coffee, she grabs a green cup before facing SV4 “Nothing special today, well i guess i do have one question. I wasnt a fan of going shopping in the middle of the night so I thought I would come here for coffee, SV3 seemed panicked at the bag. Any idea why?” 
SV4 sighs as he grabs a cookie from the jar in front of him, he looks at it with some excitement before taking a bite “You know how you said sugar is like a battery charge for me? Well I think I learned a few weeks ago what SV3 battery charge is…and let me tell you I lost someone important that day..” He frowns, staring at a small gravestone near his room, Liko follows his gaze and stares surprised at the spot  “How did i not notice that before?” Ignoring her 4 takes another bite from his cookie “Let me tell you a story that changed us in this studio.”
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Few weeks ago SV4 smirks as he waves a ps1 controller “Alright, the only real way to welcome you newbie is the great crash challenge!” SV3 bounces in excitement as he watches 4 walk over to his set up, he takes out crash team racing from its case showing it before popping it in the system. SV3 takes his seat next to 4 as he grabs his controller, SV4 smirks as the character selection screen shows up “Now let's have a fair race, don't get too pouty when you lose to me!” SV3 smiles as he picks Coco as his character “I won't! This is just us hanging out right?” SV4 slowly nods, hiding that he was in fact picking this game to show off, as the race start 4 made sure to use every shortcut he knew to his advantage. SV3 eyes go wide in awe seeing how fast his new partner was “Wow you really know your way around the game huh!” SV4 leans back holding back his smile  “Eh i know i trick or two,” it was strange to think not too long ago he felt so alone. He would play these games, study them and attempt the best time in order to do videos on them.  He never noticed how he felt lonely while he wouldn't confess to it outloud, he truly needed someone he could just play games with. SV4 didn't care much for SV3, the man would talk so much about how to match yellow with green and other assortment of colors. Stuff 4 didn't care for after all why would he change out of his overalls? After a couple of rounds SV3 felt himself nodding off, he looked around the room and noticed that there wasn't a clock “Hey…SV4 what time is it?” As he selected his character 4 reached over to the bedside table, picking up his phone he causally flashes the time to SV3.  Seeing the time 3 gasp “IT’S 2AM?!” it was no wonder the man felt his eyes getting heavy, he got up from the bed making SV4 frowns “Yeah so? It’s still early, plenty of more matches can happen.”  SV3 notices the excitement that was on SV4 vanishes and now replaced with an annoyed frown, feeling guilty he looks at the kitchen. Slowly an idea came to him, SV4 energy boost is sweets perhaps his could be caffeine and it will help him keep his partner company. 
SV3 attempts to mask his exhaustion as he points to the kitchen “Oh yeah totally…so we should make coffee,Keep spirits up!” SV4 face lights up before making a face of disgust “Coffee? Meh rather have soda but hey we all have our own preferred drinks, i'm sure that box head keeps some coffee in the cabinet.” With a nod the pair head to the kitchen, SV4 takes a seat as he watches 3 look around for a cup. SV3 was feeling strangely nervous as he grabs a yellow cup, he then goes to the top cabinet grabbing a bag of mocha coffee.  As he stares at the bag his mind races, he had no idea if he would even enjoy the beverage perhaps the right path was just to go to bed. He turns to see SV4 eating pocky as he reads a game guide for a final fantasy game he is playing, remembering the face the man had was enough to give  him the answer he needed. SV3 puts everything together then watches the coffee maker brew, he had to do this to bring that smile back on SV4's face. They are partners there was no way he could let 4 down, he grabs the cup of coffee and stares at it nervously. SV4 notices the silence then turns to 3, he stares at the man’s face for a moment before letting out a sigh “You don't have to drink it, not everyone can live the gamer life like i do.” SV3 lets out a soft giggle “I want to play more, plus nothing has ever gone wrong with someone drinking coffee!” with a bright smile he chugs the cup. 
SV4 nods as he gets up from his seat “Let's go then,”  SV3 nods following his partner to the room. He was feeling good, more alert he was confident that in a few minutes he would be wide awake, as they pick their characters SV3 giggles as the screen flickers.  SV4 looks at the tv annoyed as he struggles to find the shortcuts with the flickering “The fuck is going on with my tv?” SV3 was getting more into the game as his eyes slightly glowed, the static getting worse, SV4 swears under his breath. The moment SV3 made it past the finish line the tv stopped glitching letting SV4 able to see where he was, he pouts seeing he was in fourth place “Stupid television, maybe it's time to stop given my tv is acting up.” SV3 frowns hearing the comment “What? But I drank coffee to play more!” The room lights start to flicker as the tv screen showing the game goes static, SV4 gets up looking around his room confused “SV4…we are going to play more right?” SV4 shakes his head as he stares at his tv “Don't think so, something weird is going on with the power here.” Deciding to get answers he looks annoyed at the tv knowing he will have to talk to Mr. Puzzle, SV4 lets out a long sigh as he walks to the door “Hate that i have to do this but i need to bug box head about this issue, otherwise we won't be able to game.” SV3 eye twitches as 4 leaves the room “But…we were supposed to play games together….why are you leaving me?”  SV3 started to feel his body heat up as the lights in the bedroom exploded, leaving the static on the tv being the only source of light. 
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SV4 stops walking as the living room goes dark, he groans as he starts to walk again only to feel something squishy under his foot. He looks down squinting to see something moving on the floor “The fuck is that?” He bends down trying to get a closer look, only to see the normal studio floor. SV4 stands up pinching the bridge of his nose, he was officially losing it. SV3 leaving 4’s room frowns as he calls out to the man “SV4! I dont get why he is so upset,” he lets out a sigh as he walks following SV4.  He noticed that the man in front of him seemed to be on edge, SV3 wasn't sure what was going on with his partner as he looked around. Determined to help his partner out he reaches out hoping his hand on the man’s shoulder would give comfort, he smiles brightly ready to hear what's bothering the man. SV4 hears steps behind him causing him to be alert “This is starting to feel like a cheesy horror film,” he feels a hand touch him causing SV4 to speed up on his walk. He is a TV guardian he knows better than to turn around and face whatever phantom is in the studio, SV3 blinks as he sees SV4 avoiding his touch. He growls as his eyes start to glow, the color in the room to fade, slowly being replaced by a strange black ooze leaking from the walls as SV3 anger grows. 
“WHAT THE STARS!? WHY IS MY OFFICE ON FIRE!” hearing Mr Puzzle yelling, SV4 runs to the office to see Mr Puzzle's desk on fire. He sighs, closing the door and grabbing the fire extinguisher, as he extinguishes the fire from the corner of his eye he notices something green.  SV4 drops the extinguisher as he approaches the green object “Thank you…wait what are you doing over here, aren't you busy with those video games?” 4 gasp as he grabs a green cloth “This looks like…SV3 sweater?” Mr. Puzzle walks up to 4 staring at the cloth confused before the lights start to flicker, remembering why he came over in the first place 4 gives an annoyed look at his boss. “Hey boxhead the power has been acting up, get shit together i have games to play!” he puts the cloth in his pocket still staring at Mr. Puzzle. The screen flickered showing confusion “The power? Given that Liko set everything up, there is no way things could be on the fritz.” SV4 sighs as he walks towards the door waving his hand to sign at the man to follow. Mr. Puzzle screen changes filled with concern as he sees the door leaking a black liquid “SV4…step away from the door.”  SV4 takes a step back and looks at the door, he stares at the liquid before reaching for the door again. Mr puzzle panics reaching out to the guardian, it was too late as he watches SV4 open the door. They gasp seeing SV3 form, Mr. Puzzle shakes his head at the sight “How..did this happen?” SV4 was shocked seeing tentacles wrapping themself around SV3 arms and legs, slowly another one wrapped around his face covering his blue eye. 3's green eye glowing staring at the pair as he gives them a wide smile, the black liquid leaking from his eyes. SV4 couldn't stop staring at the as the man reached for him, the eyes on the tentacles open looking at him, 4 feels something drop on his feet and notice SV3 gloves were stained black. 
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Mr. Puzzle runs slamming the door on SV3, he then grabs SV4's hand, making him run to the hidden door in the office.  “SV4 I need you to move and tell me what happened to SV3, there is no way Liko made a mistake creating him…right?” The door opens showing an angered expression on SV3, seeing this 4 let out an awkward laugh “heh Oh hi SV3, are you…are you in there? Remember how you said you can handle coffee?” mr. Puzzle drags SV4 as they run through the dark halfway. As they run through the hallway Mr puzzle thinks over what 4 said “You're telling me that SV3 drank coffee then turned into that?” 
SV4 shrugs “Hell do i know, shit didn't start going weird till he drank coffee! If I go over what Liko told me about sugar, it's supposed to give me a boost like an energy source. We thought coffee would be the same, but I think coffee just put him into overdrive!” the pair stop running looking around. Things were quiet, making Mr. Puzzle nervous “The fact he can use this power without stars…SV3 must have come out unstable. As much as I hate to say this given I will lose a star, we might have to kill SV3 and create a new one.”  SV4 eyes go wide looking at him “What?” Mr. Puzzle screen showed a serious expression, 4 pinches the bridge of his nose and sighs “Listen box head, I could care less about him you won't see me risking my life for the man.But, isn't killing jumping the gun, plus we don't know what those tentacles and weird black ooze is.” 
Mr. Puzzle stares at SV4 before looking away, it was best that his star stay blind to the power in his body. Things will be less hostile knowing how SV4 can be about making content, he shivers at the thought of what the man would do with those kinds of powers. Then again as he looks at 4 he lets out a small chuckle, the man is too distracted by video games he wouldn't even bother using his power. SV4 turns, giving him a strange look “Why are you chuckling at a time like this?” with a shake of his head Mr. Puzzle stands up straight showing off the height difference between the two of them “My star, i chuckle because i'm surprised you claim not to care about SV3 yet you pick a route to save him? I do have to admit it would be a shame to go out and collect more DNA for one person.”
SV4 crosses his arm “Do you see SV3 as just some replaceable tool?”
Mr. Puzzle screen flickers with a charming smile as he pats SV4 back “Of course not! SV3 is my darling star with so much…talent to bring to the channel, don't you agree? We are all just a growing happy family!” SV4 squints at the Mr.Puzzle taking in his words, only to hear something approaching them. He swears under his breath “Shut it box head..something is coming.”
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SV3 knocks on the door letting out a sigh “I wonder why he is ignoring me, also strange to see him run to Mr. Puzzle wonder if something bad happened?” As he walks to the office he hears panic in the room, worried he slowly knocks on the door. He waits for a moment as he hears footsteps approach the door, he smiles brightly when he sees SV4 open the door. He stares at the pair and notices the fear and shock on their face, he tilts his head confused. Slowly he reaches out to SV4 “Why do you look so scared?” Before he could touch his partner the door suddenly slammed in his face.  Annoyed by the rude behavior he opens the door glaring at the pair, SV4 lets an awkward laugh, catching 3’s attention “heh Oh hi SV3, are you…are you in there? Remember how you said you can handle coffee?”
He pauses confused about the comment as Mr. Puzzle drags the man away, he looks around the room then himself. The more he thought about the comment the more his head started to hurt, his vision getting blurry. He felt sick as he walked over to sit down at the desk, the energy he felt at the start was slowly fading away. After a small break he gets up determined to figure out what's going on, remembering how SV4 was still talking to him SV3 knew the only way to get answers was to get SV4 alone.  He learns the same path as the others, following the hall he sees the familiar glow of Mr. Puzzle screen. 
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SV4 takes out his cell phone and turns on the light, seeing this Mr. Puzzle takes the phone from his hand “What are you doing? The light from your phone will give us away.” 4 glares at the taller man jumping up to grab his phone “Your head is literally a television, if your big ass glowing head hasn't given it away why would my small phone light do it?” Mr. Puzzle’s screen flickers, showing an annoyed expression realizing that the smaller man had a point, he hands over the phone as SV4 smirks at him. With his phone back in his hand he turns only to see a tentacle reaching out to Mr. Puzzle, without thinking he shoves the man away.
SV4 wiggles as the tentacle wraps around him, SV3 tilts his head, the black tears still falling. SV4 notices 3’s mouth moving “Want…you.” SV4 stops wiggling as he stares at 3’s mouth, then he feels a hand grabbing his “SV4 hold on i have you!” he turns seeing Mr. Puzzle grabbing on to him as his other hand was pointing at SV3. Mr. Puzzle knew he didn't have enough power to stop SV3 completely, as his view turned to SV4 wrapped in the tentacles he knew he had to still try. SV3 attempts to pull 4 closer as Mr. Puzzle grip tightens “Ow! Puzzle just let me go, I'm not going to end up in two pieces thank you!” Realizing he is hurting SV4, his view swaps from 4 to 3 unsure about letting go “And if that thing hurts you?” 
SV4 looks at the mutated SV3, his grin borderline psychotic and yet SV4 didn't feel he was in danger. 4 looks at Mr. Puzzle with an bored expression “Cause me and him are partners, pretty sure that link we have wont let him.” Mr. Puzzle sighs letting 4’s hand go, seeing the tentacle pull 4 into a hug, SV3 purrs in excitement as he runs off with SV4. Seeing SV3 start to run Mr. Puzzle starts to chase after “Not going to let anything ruin my plan, I won't let my best star get hurt.”
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SV3 gets excited when he gets closer to the pair, the closer he gets to the pair his head starts to pound. The pain in his head causes him to pause as the room begins to spin for him, the moment he sees SV4 in front of him 3 shakes his head and smiles “SV4! I wanted to talk to you, please I want to understand what's going on.” 3 grabs his arm hoping that the man would listen to him, SV4 lets out a sigh and starts to walk towards him. Finally the chase is over, that is until Mr. Puzzle grabs SV4. The tug made SV3 look at the man confused “SV4 hold on i have you!” the television screen showed a worried expression. He frowns as tears escape his eyes “Why…i don't understand…” To his surprise SV4 walked up to him, he gasped feeling the man hug him. With a soft giggle SV3 takes 4’s hand “Thank you for trusting me…come on let's talk.” As they walk away SV3 wipes his tears, he was so confused as to why the pair were acting so strange. Suddenly the room around SV3 twisted, worried he turned to check on SV4 only to gasp seeing SV4 eyes glowing red. His partner readies his fist and attempts to attack SV3, quickly he kicks 4’s legs making him lose balance. Once he hits the Floor SV3 gets up looking around for something to hold down SV4 “Is this why you two are acting weird? Don't worry I will figure this out, I will get Ms. Liko and everything will be okay!” 
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SV4 hums as he is carried away in the tentacle wishing he had his psp to play with, suddenly he gets tossed across the room. His back hitting the table in the kitchen “Ow…the hell just happened?”  SV3 lets out a chuckle as he slowly approaches him “Naughty…” 4 sits up ignoring the pain in his back. SV4 knew he had to keep alert in case the coffee made 3 do something else, seeing the slow moments made 4 smirk. The coffee is wearing off the exhaustion SV3 felt earlier in the day is starting to show, he was placing a big gamble on his theory. He watches SV3 move away for a moment, he turns his head to see 3 going into this room “What on earth is he thinking?” A few moments later SV4 sighs as SV3 ties him up “You know while I don't mind being tied up, WHY MUST YOU USE MY FAVORITE PLAYSTATION 2 CONTROLLER!” 
He felt panic everytime he moved, the thought that if he did the wrong move he could damage his controller had him almost holding his breath. SV3 sits in front of him staring at him, he is able to get a better look at the form that has taken over 3. SV4 notices how the man in front of him was relaxing, a good sign it let SV4 know that his controller was safe. He needed to figure out how to save his baby before 3 snaps and breaks it, he looks at the cord feeling his heart break at the knots they were in. SV3 reaches out and starts to pet him, SV4 relaxes from the contact “Don't take this as me liking the attention, i swear if you remember things after i will deny everything in this moment.” As he relaxes from the other man's touch, SV4 thinks over the situation as he looks at the knots in front of him. 
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He slowly wiggles which gets SV3 to stop petting him, 4 looks up seeing if he alerted the man only to see the man falling asleep. “There you go, just let sleep take over and things will go back to normal.” Before SV3 could fall asleep Mr. Puzzle’s kick the door open holding his finger up, he glares at SV3 who wakes up growling at him as he stands “LEAVE!” SV4 could just about cry at the timing, “Don't you worry now SV4, I wouldn't let down my star after all we have a video to make tomorrow.” SV4 blinks at him before rolling his eyes “Seriously? US MAKING A VIDEO TOMORROW IS THAT IMPORTANT?!” his eyes then go wide seeing Mr. Puzzle pointing his glowing finger at his constraints “Wait dont do it, do you know how rare this controller is?” Ignoring the guardians complaints, Mr.Puzzle fires a bolt of energy at the cord of the controller. SV4 panics and attempts to throw himself out of the way, sadly the bolt was faster burning the cord off of SV4 body. 4 sits there in shock, he slowly looks down seeing the golden controller without a cord. “You're welcome!” shouted Mr.Puzzle as he kept his eyes on the growling SV3, SV4 slowly picked up the controller, a tear running down his face “I will never have something as beautiful…again” SV3 roars seeing the tear coming out of SV4 eyes, Mr. Puzzle readies himself, his hand sparking “This isn't the time SV4, the eldritch creature is about ready to attack!” 
SV4 lets out a shake breath as he gets up and walks to a drawer in the kitchen, pulling out a knife he walks back to the spot where his controller is. Mr.Puzzle keeping his eyes on SV3 quickly peeks at SV4, his screen changes into an expression of shock as he sees SV4 digging into the studio floor with the knife “WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!” SV4 hearing the man shout just picked up the controller and showed it to him “I’m not a monster, I'm doing a grave site for my baby. SO SHOVE IT!”  Mr. Puzzle could only stare at 4, baffled at what was going on. Annoyed at being ignored SV3 summons a tentacle to attack Mr.Puzzle, he smirks as he points at the tentacle blasting it exactly as he did SV4 controller. Since the gamer wasn't planning on helping him, Mr. Puzzle knew what he had to do as he readied his hand at SV3. The moment he was going to blast the creature, SV3 charges at him then collapses. Mr. Puzzle stands there confused about what happened, hearing SV3 hit floor 4 makes a comment as he digs “Caffeine crash..along with too much power must have drained him to sleep.” Mr. Puzzle lifts up the man, the eldritch traits are all gone. No black liquid or tentacles to see, there in his arms was a drained SV3, soundly asleep. “Your theory was right it seems, ahem good work SV4 i shall place him in the room.” As he carries SV3 the dark stains along with any other signs of the eldritch power 3 was throwing around is gone, the studio went back to normal beside a couple of broken furniture. SV4 gives the makeshift grave a sad smile “I will never forget you, ah the memories of fighting for you on ebay…good times.” 
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SV3 frowns seeing SV4 struggle against the restraints “Sorry SV4, I hope you don't mind I used the first thing I found. I really want to go get Liko to help you but…it breaks my heart to think about leaving you alone like this.” nervously, SV3 reaches out and pets 4. Seeing SV4 glaring at him with red eyes, SV3 wondered how this happened when they were playing crash. For a moment he thought the game could be cursed, as he stares at SV4, notices a flicker of something in his eyes. SV3 started to feel his eyes go heavy, shaking his head he knew he had to stay awake if he didnt what would happen to his partner. He wasn't even sure if Mr.Puzzles wasn't acting strange also, the door to the room burst open catching 3’s attention. He gets up staring at the door, surprised.  “Don't you worry now SV4, I wouldn't let down my star after all we have a video to make tomorrow.” SV3 slowly walks towards him “Mr.Puzzle im not doing anything to him, please believe me i think there is something wrong with SV4!”
Mr.Puzzles lifts up his hand firing at SV4, 3 panics as he turns towards the spot “SV4!” Once the smoke cleared up SV3 relaxed, seeing that his partner was safe. Then he noticed the constraints were now broken. “Oh no, what did you do….” SV3 was ready to face the worst, he watched ready for SV4 to attack, only 4 looked down seeing his controller broken and started to cry. Seeing that made SV3 smile slightly “He is still in there, now Mr. Puzzle, it isn't nice to just blast at people!” SV4 then gets up catching SV3 and Mr.Puzzles attention, they watch as he walks to the kitchen grabbing a knife. SV3 feels nervous seeing him with a weapon, he keeps his eyes on the man then relaxes when he sees SV4 digging a hole into the studio floor “Huh…I feel terrible that I got his controller broken, but at least some of SV4 came out for this.” Mr. Puzzle sighs then lifts his finger at SV3 catching him by surprise “W-what? Mr. Puzzle please listen to me, I didn't harm him!” As his hand starts to glow SV3 knew the only fighting chance he had was to knock him off balance, after all 3 wasn't a monster that wanted to fight his friends. SV3 charges at Mr. Puzzle hoping that he can stop the blast, only his body suddenly feels drained of energy as he slams onto the cold floor, everything going dark. 
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SV3 groans as he sits up from his bed, he looks around and sees he is tucked into bed “Did I dream that up?” The door to his room opens catching his attention, he feels himself getting panicked as he sees SV4 walk in the room. SV4 looks up from his psp and looks at SV3 surprised “Hey you're not dead, someone's been sleeping for three days really like that number hm?” SV3 relaxes letting out a giggle before it clicks, he gets up startled at the comment “Asleep for three days?! How? All I remember was…” he closed his eyes thinking over everything that happened. Given SV4 is acting normal things must have gotten fixed at some point, SV4 walks up to him with his cellphone “When you grab me i didn't notice that my phone took a photo, it will be shocking to see.” SV3 tilts his head confused “Grab you?” He looks at his partner's phone and gasps, seeing himself. He felt sick seeing the tentacles around him along with the strange dark liquid that came out of his eyes and hand. “This…can't be, you agreed to walk with me and you started acting weird…right?” SV4 frowns hearing the man's panic “No SV3, you drank coffee and became this mutated creature. You went and hunted down me and box head.” SV3 sits on the bed his hand shaking as tears threaten to escape, SV4 awkwardly looks around the room unsure what to do. SV3 reaches out to hug him only to get a gentle push “I don't do hugs, but I don't blame your reaction it was pretty surprising for us to.” 
SV3 moves himself in order to give himself a hug, he had memories of SV4 acting strange. He swore he never saw himself look like that with his reflections “What…did i do? Did I hurt you guys?” SV4 lets out a soft chuckle “Nope, you kidnapped me and tied me up with my controller which broke me. Ahem you also set box head office on fire. That was pretty funny, but you didn't hurt anyone, you just kept chasing us for some reason.” SV3 stays silent hearing SV4 before breaking down crying, unsure what to do SV4 awkwardly pats 3’s head. SV3 couldn't believe he hallucinated everything while he was tormenting his friends, how much of a monster is he?
SV4 sighs looking at the photo “Would it make you feel better if i tell you, this only happens after you drank coffee?  I think your body isn't a fan of it and well this happens.” he stares at the photo before turning to SV3. The man kept crying into his hands showing no signs of stopping anytime soon, SV4 sighs as he scoots closer to SV3 giving his head another pat. SV3 looks up to SV4 as he wipes his tears attempting to hold back the rest of his tears, he lets out an awkward chuckle “I must look gross and weird without make up huh?” SV4 giggles and shakes his head “Nah you still look good, hell you slayed the eldritch look too.” They both laugh as they continue talking about the event and planning their rematch. -----------------------------------------------------------------------
Present day Liko stared at SV4 in shock, how could something this huge happen and no one bothered to tell her. She watches as SV4 places a small flower on the grave “I was never the same after that,” ignoring SV4 being sad at his makeshift grave Liko asks the question on her mind “Why did no one tell me about this?”  SV4 steps away from the grave and pouts at Liko “Heartless of you to not show empathy over my loss, but to answer you Puzzle said not to talk about it.” Hearing this she nods chugging her coffee, after cleaning her cup she marches to the front door. SV4 slowly follows after her as he watches her reach for the door “Where is the fire?” “I need to go to my lab and see what is causing this,” she turns and smiles softly at SV4 “Thank you for this information, take care of that eye cause those bandages are coming off real soon!” With that she leaves the building, SV4 frowns as he turns, staring at 3’s door. He walks over to open the door, he hums as he enters the room closing the door behind him “SV3 i know your not sleeping, i think we have shared a bed enough times that i would know easy.” SV3 slowly gets up wiping his tears, seeing this SV4 runs over to 3’s side hugging him “Hey hey you're okay, is this because of the coffee?”  SV3 wraps his arms around SV4 crying, they hold each other for a few moments before 3 pulls away “I’m scared to be that monster again, just the smell makes me worry…” 
SV4 gives a soft smile to 3 “Well if it happens again i have your back, as long as we are together coffee can't turn you into a monster!” SV3 slowly smiles before patting the spot next to him “Can you stay the night?” 4 nods as he gets up from the bed, he looks at the time and lets out a dramatic sigh “Gee i guess i could clear my busy gaming time for you,” SV3 chuckles as he watches 4 head out of the room “Hey 4…how did you know I needed you?” SV4 stops walking as places his hand to his chest “I just had a feeling, after all Liko mentioned you freaked out seeing coffee. What kind of partner would I be if I didn't come over? Now let me grab a ds and we can play some games till we sleep.” SV3 blushes as he watches 4 leave the room, he touches his face “oh gosh why did my face get so warm again…” he flops on the bed then looks at the spot next to him with a soft smile “I hope this cold doesn't stop SV4 from sleeping over…” 
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waughymommy · 2 days ago
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COLLEGE STUDENT IN DIAPER 🧷
Chapter 5
That evening at the dinner table. every time I looked up, Evelyn was staring at me. She would give me a smile when our eyes met. I would smile back.
The time came, time to get our diapers on.
I have and have not been dreading this all night.
Aunt Kathy took Evelyn and I and she cleaned us, powdered us up, then diapered us. Evelyn was  first. I stared up at the ceiling while Evelyn was diapered. When it was my turn, I looked and Evelyn had lifted her upper body up on an elbow. She was watching Aunt Kathy diaper me!
Aunt Kathy and Uncle John left the livingroom and Evelyn cam and put a hand on my diapered front. Being a guy and not knowing if she was going to squeeze me there or not, I grabbed her wrist and removed her hand.
"I can feel your man thing through your diaper!" Evelyn stated.
"Evelyn please don't touch me there,I, I am over 18 and what you want will get me thrown in prison. You are only 17 years old!" I said.
"I will be 18 in three months from today though!" She pleaded!
I started thinking, yep three more months.
"You can watch when mom diapers me, John Jr. used to."
"No I can't, Aunt Kathy would cut my testicles off and poke my eyes out"
Evelyn smiled and said "Yeah she would, wouldn't she! Willy just so you know I have always had a crush on you. I looked foreward to your visits here or ours to your place, they were always the best!"
"Don't tell anyone but I have always had a huge crush on you, you were always the most beautiful girl I knew by far!" I told her!
"You noticed me! With John Jr. being so sick, everybody seen him, I was an afterthought! You took me and I got to see you play football and play tag and other games John Jr. couldnt! The worst day of my life and the best was the day he died, does that make sense?"
"Evelyn believe it or not it does, I understand it. On one hand you lost your brother the only one you had, on the other people started seeing you, mainly Aunt Kathy and Uncle John!"
"That's it, that is exactly it! Thank You!"
Aunt Kathy came back, "What are you two up to, as if I didnt know! Did he kiss you Evelyn?" She asked?
I was shocked!
"No mom, he is 18 and scared of repercussions with the law, and you." Evelyn said.
"Me? Willy your mom and I we always thought you two would be perfect for each other!"
"You did?" We both said.
Neither one of had heard this theory before.
"Go ahead kiss her!" Aunt Kathy said.
At first I looked at Aunt Kathy like she had three heads.
I took Evelyn and I kissed her. I kissed her for another 10 seconds. Aunt Kathy had said "That's enough, that's enough" about 3 times.
We broke Evelyn had a huge smile on her face, "Wow, that was better than I imagined it would be!"
Aunt Kathy said "I guess I will have to keep an eye on you two!"
Evelyn went to her room and I went to mine.
Evelyn now knows how I feel about her! I though.
Aunt Kathy brought me a glass of warm milk.
She waited for the glass I drank it down.
20 minutes later the milk did it's job I fell asleep.
My dreams were of Evelyn and I getting married, it was heaven.
I awoke needing to pee like crazy!
I went to go to the toilet, dammit I was wearing a diaper, a cloth diaper. Even if I could get it off I could never get it back on again.
I looked at the clock 5:43, breakfast was almost an two hours and half away at 8:30am. No way I can last that that long! 
I remembered how disappointed Aunt Kathy was that I was dry yesterday. I started trying to wet the diaper, my toilet training was strong, my bladder wouldn't let a drop out. I wasn't peeing in a toilet. I got an Idea I went and stood in front of the toilet, I was good until I felt the warmness of my urine spreading inside my diaper. My brain said "Hey wait a minute it's not supposed to feel like this!" My bladder shut down again!
"I began to say it's okay I'm wetting my bed!"
My brain said "Is that all?" My flow started again. I was done and my brain said., "Hey wait a minute, were not a bedwetter!" If I hadn't of been done, I knew that a single drop wouldnt get out now! 
I went back to bed my penis was encased in a nice warm, but damp cocoon. That was my last thought before when my alarm went off and I got up to eat breakfast.
Aunt Kathy checked me and found me wet, I had to pee about 5:45am. She looked pleased and disappointed at the same time. 
After breakfast Evelyn and I were released from our diapers. With it being Saturday we cleaned the house top to bottom.
Evelyn and I had a few more opportunities to steal a few kisses.
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sugar-crash · 1 day ago
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🪲👑CYBUG King Candy (Wreck-It Ralph) x (gn) Reader🍭🕷️
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(Picture’s not mine!)
(Ask here! Had a ball writing this one, let me tell you, I LOVE MONSTROUS BUG PPL!! And this one in particular has a very special place in my heart lol, he’s so fucked up lookin’)
- Alright so, one thing we can agree on is that for both sides of this predicament here is that things escalate and escalate quickly, even before you see each other in person once more.
- I mean, imagine being roped into the nonsense that Ralph causes when he game jumps alongside Fix-It Felix and Calhoun… Essentially third wheeling them, their strange yet endearing dynamic blossoming right in front of you. Maybe a part of you is reminded of that long gone romance between you and Turbo.
- Every step, every word, everything feels as if it’s trying to make you remember him, down to the point when Felix tells Calhoun of Turbo in such a ‘in your face’ manner rather than beating around the bush or vaguely referring to him like people of the arcade usually do—
- The negative effects of that only making those supposedly long dead feelings come out of the woodwork, his influence seemingly all encompassing as haunts the narrative of the overall story.
- And the kicker? The cherry on this vile sundae?? That bastard is still ALIVE, HASN’T EVEN CHANGED, dramatically introducing himself to the little girl he’s trying to MURDER, to the guy he literally manipulated, and unknowingly to you, and he’s just as impulsive and selfish as you remembered him to be.
- To say there’s some negative consequences to this would be an understatement of the century… I can’t imagine a reader who would be ok with all of this crazy all at once. Especially if you were scorned by him in the past.
- Constantly having to walk on eggshells only for him to complain about the crunching sounds said eggshells are making… Yeah no it’s not fun and having to deal with weird bug monster things makes it even worse.
- Not to mention having to deal with him in a monster bug form that TOWERS over a 9ft Ralph and IS ABLE TO FUCKING PICK HIM OFF OF THE GROUND??? Terrifying. Terrible— Unfathomable.
- The wide variety of words I have in my arsenal would not be able to fully describe the absolute magnitude of it for anyone.
- I can’t imagine a final confrontation that doesn’t involve you guys duking it out in some way, I live for that type of angsty shit— Like trying to fight him as a means to stall for Ralph? Maybe.
- Having to handle your ex that’s a mutated, feral, and downright manic version of himself is something nightmares are made out of, having such a great disadvantage from not only his overpowered body, but with the emotional damage of all these sudden revelations this god forsaken night has caused?? Yeah it’s rougher than rough, which I believe Cybug King Candy would absolutely delight in.
- His sadistic tendencies being right out in the open now, now that he has the confidence and the form to back it up—
- Even if you two had something in the past, he still delights in misery, maybe has a twisted delight in seeing you in particular all bent out of shape about everything he’s doing not only to Sugar Rush but also to the main cast.
- If he’s given the chance I do see him trying to sweep you off of your feet, like, literally. Flaunting off his new form, relishing in your palpable fear among other things, it’s as if he strives to make you squirm.
- Keeps you on your toes with his unpredictable behavior, constantly switching from being overly joyful one second and frighteningly aggressive the next. He’s unstable both physically and mentally, face constantly glitching from the one you used to know all those years ago to this new more crazed one with a sharp toothed grin and a bloodthirsty glint in his eye.
- The audacity oozing from him is deadly when he’s the self-appointed ‘final boss’, throwing you around like a rag doll through the air and catching you by the leg just because.
- But in a way he’s always been like this, but now he has the power to be what he wants, and that’s something that craves power, thinks he’s owed it for everything he does.
- I believe he thinks he’s owed you in particular, all the worst of him out in the open, not afraid to reveal those ugly parts of himself anymore, too far down the rabbit hole to stop and think.
- Which, as we all know, is how he gets got, letting his gloating and sadistic side to have too much of the spotlight, being inevitably put down like the rabid dog he is.
- Much like how he is with so many other things, he simply couldn’t resist letting those metaphorical and literal wings of his melt like Icarus, no more redos, no more chances, no more him.
(.. ... / - .... .. ... / . -. -.. / --- ..-. / .. - --..-- / . -. -.. / --- ..-. / . ...- . .-. -.-- - .... .. -. --. ..--..)
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gothic-aesthetic-gal · 3 days ago
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Old Scars (Part 15)
Ledger!joker x reader
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Fem!reader is kidnapped by the joker and his henchmen while just trying to get a moment's reprieve from her boring, soul-destroying job ✨️
Tw: I mean, we all saw TDK, right? I'd say this is on the same level/rating. Kidnapping, violence, mentions of minor characters (not J) being misogynist/threatening SA, reference to past traumatic injury. This chapter's pretty soft actually, no violence for once 😂 Beyond this i'm not sure, i'll update these when I write more.
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Chapter 15 -
The next thing I was aware of was somebody else entering the room, though some time later. Their footsteps rounded the bed to the side I was curled up on and the sudden intrusion of the sound woke me up with a jolt. I looked up to see the familiar tall figure of a man in dress pants and a dishevelled shirt with the sleeves rolled up to his elbows. He looked recently showered; his hair was still wet and his bare face still had some traces of shaving foam on it. He clumsily replaced the errant strap of his suspenders as they slid off of his shoulder and crouched down beside me. As I realised who he was, I struggled to untangle the knotted threads of reality and the dream.
"Hello there," he said, with a voice like dry leaves on asphalt.
"I saw you," I murmured shakily.
He sat down beside me on the bed with a hum which suggested he was intrigued.
"And you were afraid."
I pulled myself upright so that I was seated with my legs crossed, and much to my alarm quickly realised how few clothes I was wearing. I hurriedly clutched the bedsheets to me, feeling very exposed but trying (and failing) to play it off like I wasn't. Oh god, there was no way the pair of them hadn't already seen too much.
"Afraid of you? A little, yes, but everything in that place was terrifying. You were just part of the landscape," I said as nonchalantly as I could.
He seemed a little surprised by my candid answer and highly amused by my attempt to preserve some kind of modesty. He handed me a cold glass of water with a tablet fizzing away inside it.
"Drink that."
"What is it?"
"Just drink it."
I sighed, for once not having the energy to argue and began to sip it quickly, not liking the taste. When it was half empty, I put it on the bedside dresser. He stayed sat beside me, fingers pressed together into a steeple as he seemed to drift somewhere far away in his mind. I watched the muscles and tendons of his forearms flex as his fingers moved in repetetive shapes.
"Penny for your thoughts?" I asked in my hoarse voice, recalling that he had used this particular turn of phrase on me before.
The corner of his mouth twitched upwards in the faintest hint of a smile, recognition of how i'd passed his own words back to him. He didn't share, of course. He never liked to show his hand, no matter what game we were playing.
"What happened to me?" I asked instead.
"You don't remember your little, uh, scuffle with the Russian?"
"Don't be difficult, you know what I mean. What did he stick me with?" I grumbled.
He turned to look me up and down, measuring the depth of my frustration and finding it to be fairly shallow.
"A kind of fear toxin, courtesy of disgraced Arkham psychiatrist Jonathan Crane. I hear it's causing all sorts of trouble in the Narrows since the dealers got hold of it."
"Why would that ever be sold as a recreational drug?" I scoffed in disbelief.
"To be fair," he said, flicking his tongue against his lower lip, "I think it's deliberately mis-sold."
"False advertising," I echoed as I wondered if he'd always had such an unusual tic, or if he'd developed it over time. I still found it unnerving.
"Yes. Maybe he wants to hold people to ransom and grind out a little profit selling the antidote," J added.
"You think that's Crane's M.O.?" I asked.
His tongue clicked against his teeth as he let out a kind of exasperated sigh.
"How should I know? He's crazy."
I failed to stifle a grin at the irony of such a dismissal coming from him, of all people.
"What's so amusing to you?" He asked, his voice slithering back into a slightly more sinister register.
His face took on a serious expression and he flexed his jaw. I realised I might be treading dangerous ground.
"I just find it a little hypocritical. I bet people call you crazy too," I answered earnestly, not wanting his unpredicatable moods to mold my own behaviour.
"I'm not crazy. I'm not," he muttered, though whether he was talking to himself or me was unclear.
"I didn't say you were -".
"Ah but you were thinking it. You were about to," he pointed a finger in my direction as his eyes narrowed.
"I only meant that people would say it, I've no idea whether you actually are. Besides, I wouldn't know what counts as crazy anymore, not after that bad trip," I muttered with a roll of my eyes.
He seemed to ease off a little.
"So how long was I out?" I changed track.
He paused, like he was at an intersection deciding whether to follow me down this new road in conversation, eventually he did.
"A couple of days. We got the antitoxin in you within three hours but you had a highly concentrated dose."
I thought about what the whole syringe might have done to me. Vladislav had clearly meant to kill me, or drive me permanently out of my mind. I shuddered just as Tony reappeared with a bundle of clothes in hand and my duffle bag.
"Here, I washed these for you."
There was something so unexpected about this enormous, fierce man, handing me my clothes like a mother getting a child ready for school. He set down the bag and clothes on the unoccupied side of the bed
"You can go now, I'll call when I need you. You know the drill by now," J said, tossing him a set of jangling keys.
I wondered how long Tony had been away from his family, and tried to remember what having people waiting at home for you felt like. I heard his footsteps fade, a door open and close, and finally, the rumble of a car engine as it pulled away. In his absence, the silence that fell over us was deafening.
"What happened to them?" I finally asked in my desperation to end the quiet.
"Are you sure you'd like to know that?" J asked, his tone dancing between seriousness and playfulness.
"Nicky shot Trigger, and you shot Nicky, but what happened to Vlad?"
Even without the paint, I watched a growing darkness twist the features of the man beside me. I hurriedly turned my eyes away from his face, instead settling on the peeling yellow wall paper in the corner of the room.
"I wasn't sure what to do with him at first. I considered killing him, but he just seemed to go deeper and deeper into madness. It was fascinating to watch."
Unable to stop myself, I turned back towards him, and watched the growing fire in his eyes as he spoke; he was becoming increasingly animated with each word.
"Tony dropped him downtown. Most likely he'll be picked up and carted off to Arkham. His fate is an excellent warning against any of the other men who might be tempted back into Maroni's deep pockets."
"He's stuck in a living nightmare. Yeah, I'd heed that warning," I said dryly.
"Exactly! This is so much better than just shooting him and dumping him in the harbour: the mob are desensetised to that. It's basically a regular tuesday for them, but this? No, no, this is much more of a powerful threat..."
His piercing gaze met my own.
"Still, I suppose you disapprove..." he said with a smirk.
"Are you kidding me? He tried to kill me and nearly had me stuck in some kind of endless hell."
I laughed a little at the idea I was going to be reproachful and I had his intensely undivided attention as I continued:
"It's satisfying to know that he's stuck like that. He set those wheels in motion. Let him suffer like I did."
He made a kind of sound under his breath, like he was pleased with my outburst and I moved to drink the rest of the water, still clutching the blankets to my chest. I still felt like I was nursing the worst hangover of my entire life, like I'd suffered an electric shock. One time I had forgot to unplug the toaster when I was cleaning it with a damp cloth and it felt like someone tied a housebrick with a string connected to each of my fingers and thrown it off of a cliff. The way all of my muscles had snapped taught and suddenly cramped - it was one of the worst pains I had ever experienced. This felt like that but all over, somehow worse. I grasped a tshirt from the fresh pile, and looked pointedly at him.
When he didn't move, I was forced to use words.
"Turn around already," I grumbled.
Both his eyebrows pulled up into a knowing look as he laughed.
"I hate to break it to you doll, but you tore off your clothes whilst screaming like a banshee yesterday evening. It might be a little late for that."
My cheeks flushed red as I felt the sting of embarasment. Still I hurriedly stuffed the t-shirt over my head and pulled it on the moment he made a big scene of turning to face the wall for me.
"You can turn back," I groaned and laid my head back down against the cool pillow, feeling terrible.
The next time I woke up, J was sat on the empty side of the bed, his long legs out in front of him, crossed at the ankle and he was holding out a plate. His face paint had reappeared by now and he wordlessly gestured for me to take the food he'd brought. I sluggishly propped myself up enough to take one, and instead he forcibly shoved the plate into my hands.
"You need to eat these," he said sternly.
Wordlessly and methodically I worked my way through the crackers as he watched me intently. They had a layer of peanut butter and jelly haphazardly slapped on top of them, I assumed for the purpose of giving me some sugar intake.
"It's a good thing i'm not allergic to peanuts, huh? Did you think of that?" I jabbed an elbow into his ribs playfully, somehow forgetting the many reasons not to do that kind of thing.
He looked baffled, which made me laugh a little.
"What's so funny?" He said sounding almost hurt.
"Your face; you just looked so confused."
"People don't tend to touch me," he muttered, rattling over the t sounds..
"Yeah, well people will give you a wide berth if you go around blowing up half the city. Who'd have guessed?" I rolled my eyes.
Suddenly, he produced something from his pocket. It was a brilliant red apple, almost as vibrant as his painted smile. He rubbed it against his waistcoat as though he was polishing it. I watched him quizically as he took a bite and then tossed it into my lap. He had a maddening habit of chewing without properly closing his mouth which immediately made my skin crawl.
"What?" He asked, spotting my change in body language.
I gently put my hand over his mouth.
"Don't you have any manners?" I said as playfully as I could manage.
His eyes locked with my own and he slowly pulled my hand down.
"Define manners... I find that most of them are a waste of time. An unwritten social contract we're all just dragged into."
"Yes, but -" I tried to argue. He cut me off.
"Do you know, what happens if you get lacerations from here, to here? He asked, following the red line of paint which almost went from ear to ear.
"No," I answered, anxiety rising in my chest.
"Well, about here, is something called the parotid duct. It's basically the tube that carries your saliva, from where it is produced further back, into your mouth. If that gets cut, a surgeon will have to try reconstructing it. Even if they are successful, you'll probably have issues with it for life."
He gestured to a point on his cheek about two thirds of the way from his mouth to his ear, right at the top of his longer scar. Instantly, I realised what an asshat I had been and felt a burning shame spreading throughout my body.
"Not to mention, there's all kinds of nerves in here..." he pressed further, tracing the forked outline of some of them against my cheek with a finger.
"I'm so sorry, I didn't think -"
He waved a hand to shut me up, but I ignored him.
"No, I am. That was me being a prick. I of all people should have thought about that."
He placed a finger to my lips in a shushing motion and my words finally came to a halt.
"Don't waste your time, doll. I don't care. Not about manners and not about what you just said." He said, nodding his head affirmatively in a frantic way.
I was sure that I felt a rogue tear slip out and roll down my cheek, despite my attempts to suppress the overwhelming feeling of regret that was welling up inside me. How had I missed the obvious and said something so careless, like so many people had done to me? Before I could wipe it away, he spotted it and pulled his body closer to mine. He cupped my face in his hands with a look of childlike fascination in his features.
"What's this, a tear? For me?" He mused.
I tried to turn my head away, but he tightened his grip in resistance against me. I was then suddenly afraid of what he would do next. He swept the tear away with his thumb and released me from his grasp. Not knowing what had taken over me, I folded my arms around his waist and I laid back down.
He remained sat with his back to the headboard, and surprisingly didn't try to remove my clinging grasp on him as he stayed uncharacteristically still. I felt him rest a hand against the side of my face. Normally I would have recoiled even at the idea of anyone touching my broken skin, but there was something about his touch that felt like it was white hot and purifying. It was the opposite to the feeling of disgust and corruption that my attacker in the alley had left lingering on me.
"Sometimes, when its about to rain, espescially if theres a storm coming, it feels like the plate in my head starts to vibrate."
"So they turned you into a human barometer? That's unfortunate..."
"I mean it's a pretty shit power, it fucking hurts, but I can tell you if it's about to rain really heavily," I smiled weakly.
I felt his hand smooth the hair over the location of my titanium plate.
"You know, I applied for a specialist plastic surgeon to help me heal better," I began, seeing an opportunity for a little dark humour; "to stop me looking like I lost a fight to someone wielding a cheese grater..."
I felt him chuckle at my ridiculous image which was at odds with the emotional weight of what I was sharing.
"but my insurance provider denied me everything except the most basic stitch-up and a permanent plate."
He gave a hum which indicated he was listening intently.
"I can't help thinking maybe I wouldn't have a lifetime of headaches if they hadn't put the cheapest thing possible in there. And, of course, the scars could have been much less noticeable," I sighed, running my hand over the valleys and ridges travelling down from my temple.
"The whole system - It's a bad joke," he muttered.
I nodded with a sigh.
"But it will never change. It's so utterly depressing. I hate it."
I felt his fingers clumsily tracing over my face again.
"We live in a cruel world, it's true."
"Are you wondering how it happened?" I whispered.
"No. The past is the past. When you live in the world we do, the only way to stay sane is to live in the present."
A smile crept its way onto my face.
"If you'd asked, I would've lied to you any way. Even to you, I wouldn't give that away," I admitted, looking up at his face.
He seemed struck by this, looking down at me with a renewed kind of fascination.
"What?"
"Nothing," he answered, patting me on the head.
Unlike him, my thoughts drifted to the future. Whatever this was could not end well: It couldn't last. Reality was always chasing me down.
"Lie to me," I said suddenly.
"What?"
"Tell me we have a future, that there's hope. That whatever this is between us, it will all be okay."
"Doll, you know that's really not -" he began with a sigh and shifted within my grasp.
"It doesn't have to be convincing. I just need to hear the words."
He was silent for a while, as I waited to see if he would do what I'd asked. He sighed and grumbled under his breath as he turned closer to me.
"We can leave all of this behind us. We'll run off into the sunset and live happily ever after. No more batman, no more Gotham city, no more police. I'll take you to the mountains - or are you the sort of girl who prefers the ocean? We can do both, all that greenery, and you can swim in the water."
It didn't matter that I knew the words were empty, or that he himself sounded utterly unconvinced. I picked up the apple, which had already started to brown where the missing piece was, and ate some of it myself. It was surprisingly sweet and crisp. I let my eyes drift closed and fashioned myself a strange sort of Eden in my imagination. I found myself falling back into the dance we had been locked in when I was under Crane's toxin. I was so tired.
I had nearly died a second time, and like the first, it had changed me in ways I didn't yet know...
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Link to the masterlist for other chapters:
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Tag list:
If I forgot anyone or you want to be removed from the tag list - please let me know! 💕
@dis0rderly-cl0wn-nerd
@dance-like-a-clown
@furisodespirit
@heath-ledger-jokers-wife
@sunfyrejoker
@lightsabergirl
@clowning--around
@ruby-da-archangel
@harleenqvinn
@helchronicles
@ostricx
@knoepfl
@jumpingjellyfishhaha
@nicklet94
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Dividers by @strangergraphics ✨️
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bepoucorp · 4 months ago
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happy late bday to Arkham Origins!
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clockwise-works · 7 months ago
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Did you ever have a book series that you were really into as a kid that you dropped after your brain just kinda clicked into the realization "man this book sucks what am I even doing here"
Mine was Wings of Fire by Tui T Sutherland. Middle school me was very invested and then just wasn't lmao.
Uhhhh so personally not really. As a kid I *did* read, but I never got into those Y.A. series. I never really did get into those series you read as a teen and later realize it's not all that, whether it be for genuine issues (Harry Potter is one that comes to mind), or just weak writing.
I've had that with other mediums, though, like video games, movies series, and TV shows, but never a book series.
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serethereal · 2 years ago
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hello ren <3 i'd like u to rank kenstewy moments <3
RECORD SCRATCH. LAURIE HOW COULD YOU DO THIS TO ME UM OK. UM. OK SO
1. we had the whole world in our hands and you fucking walked man. why - i wont lie this scene sorta did kill me it did slice open my chest and pull my heart out it did and like. i’ve been bleeding out since
2. when stewy looks at him in the elevator. that was my pride and prejudice hand scene
3. KEN IS YOUR FUCKING HEAD ON STRAIGHT *screams and throws up*
4. when he sent a trojan horse to kendalls apartment instead of texting “hey. im downstairs” like ok queen..you got his attention …
5. “the things is ken. and due respect. i really don’t trust you” literally every scene between them at the retreat is gold
6. ken just take the money and get out. please !!! um. throws up
7. stewy gets between him and logan like “logan for tonight shall we—” after having admitted to being afraid of logan himself … literally the only person to stand up to that beast that whole season ummm if that’s not love what is
8. when stewy gives him 3 billion dollars because he asked <33 that entire scene at the coffee shop changed the trajectory of my life tbfh
9. i can trust you right? no. sure but like on money stuff i can trust you? no. (soulmates. to me.)
10. when they colluded to sign off the deal and avoid going to a vote <33 i love white collar crime bfs :(
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the-spoingus-show · 2 months ago
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my current project: jump forever!
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this is the first of those scheduled posts i mentioned earlier!!! i figured i would start by talking about my current project - that way i can start posting updates about it without confusing you, Michael. The next post is gonna be about the beginning of this whole Godot thing i've been on, and then i'm thinking about maybe doing a Before Godot post as a bonus once i've talked about all my godot stuff (i love saying this as if anybody cares (besides you, Michael)). setting all that aside, though: this one's gonna need some backstory, so you should buckle in.
around this time last year, me and my little cousin (he's still in high school, but we've always been pretty close) got really competitive about a little game called Jump Forever. it's a side minigame from WarioWare Mega Microgames (the GBA one) where you just jump over a little rope until you fuck up. it's really fucking fun as an addictive little mobile game, and with a quick lil emulator it was one. thus, the addiction began.
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truth be told, the phase last year didn't even last that long, but i had a long bus ride a couple of weeks ago and found myself opening the GBA emulator on my phone to pass the time. that led to a little bit of playing at home, which led to beating my cousin's score, which led to getting even more into the game than i was before. as our scores get higher, we've turned to better controllers than a phone touch screen for serious record attempts - i use a ds lite i had lying around (that i reshelled! it was very fun) and he emulates on pc with a controller (i think). this got me thinking about a potential "definitive edition" of the game - probably still on mobile, but with controller support, better touch controls (the game only needs <-, ->, and A!), faster resets, selectable skins, and maybe even unlockable skins? of course, when i finished my work on fnaf (ooh foreshadowing), my sights were immediately set on a Jump Forever remake.
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with all that said, welcome to the game as it currently stands! at the moment, i've got wario, the rope swingers, and the score all just about set up, with one exception; the characters have collision, the rope swings (at varying speeds, even!), and wario's speed and physics feel very accurate - but i'm still working on the ai (if you can call it that) of the rope guys as they walk back and forth. i want it to work exactly the same way as it does in the original but i always overthink random mechanics like this. hopefully the next update i give will be about how i cracked it! even if the implementation ends up jank, though, it wouldn't be the first: the rope guys check if wario is too close to them to make it over the rope with an Area2D that just checks for wario when the rope hits the ground. it works! i could just like check wario's position in the code (and it'd probably be way more efficient), but this way just... works.
i still have a buncha crap i still gotta implement before the game's even really playable - the walking ai, the title screen, the little "Ready?" animation, etc. - but that's only the beginning of my work. firstly, i'm probably gonna enlist chloe (oooh foreshadowing) to help me out by drawing some new assets (if she's free, it is finals season), and then changing the game's native resolution from 240x160 (the GBA screen) to something not fucking insane. i've got "reworking all the sprites into easy to read spritesheets" on my to-do list, and after that, making the new assets (and then maybe the skins?) will be as easy as drag & drop. once it's got the new assets and all the polish that needs to come with a shiny new resolution, i'm gonna transition into the next phase - researching how to release a game!!!
[hi, not to ruin my own amazing transition but: it's 5am and i'm running back to edit this because i completely forgot to mention that i have currently implemented a 2 frame input delay on all inputs, because that's how the emulator appears to behave when i go frame by frame. every single day i rethink this decision more and more. surely there's no way that's how it's supposed to be, right? but i feel so weird changing it now!!! i definitely fucking have to though. next time i work on it. ok anyways]
now. i've posted games to itch.io before. but even then, i kind of fucked it up (i could never get the resolution of my web games to work right???) - so it's no surprise i've always been completely daunted by the idea of "releasing a game". when you post it on real stores, that's when it becomes... real. i'm excited about the new challenges it'll pose, though! now, a mobile release means a couple of things - bite sized fun, simple progression, and fun customization. i've already got the first part nailed down, and i figured i could nail the other 2 at once with a currency system based on how many points you get (or maybe even an xp system? that goes up 1 for each jump? maybe even both???) and skins (purchasable with said currency) that let you customize the player, rope swingers, background, and maybe even the rope itself.
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pictured above is my stupid ass skins mockup (i literally just made this). the rope is rainbow, the background has a snow effect and a bunch of snow on the trees/ground (isn't it great?), wario is a lil version of the rope guys, and the rope guys have santa hats. i'm not sure how many different ropes you could really make with how i'm planning the rope to move, so i'll probably end up prototyping the graphics with chloe to figure out how to lay out the sprite sheets, and if they should actually have a seperate hand-grabbing-the-rope sprite for skin purposes. it'll definitely make things really confusing, but if i go for a mobile release i don't want to run ads, and so a currency you can buy with real money (and maybe one or two goofy supporter skins that cost real money, like a solid gold guy or something, as a form of donation) is a good way to make a lil bit of money from people who like the game.
all of this is fun to think about, but it's important to remember that the next thing i have to do is that walking ai. i've gotta Make The Fucking Game before i can do all this crazy other bullshit. i'm sure the ui design for all this is gonna be soooo fun, but i need a game to attach it to first :p
this went on reeeally long but i figure if this is a dev diary or w/e it's gonna end up running long no matter what, and the more info, the more i have to look back on fondly and say "oh shit, i know exactly when this was!", which is kind of the end goal of the project. of course, these incredibly long posts about shit that only matters to me are also incredible content for you, Michael, so i'm sure you're just eating this shit up. enjoy, you weird little man.
#game dev#jump forever#godot#yeah yeah i got some real tags too. just in case i actually need em.#also michael's still here. i think he's funny#it's only been like an hour for me soooo#remember when i said it was 1am in my first post? it's 4am now lol#i looove tags i love rambling under my post where people don't feel obligated to read it#nobody ask me why i have the stickmen swinging the rope instead of kat/ana like it is after you beat them#(he said as if anybody would've noticed)#i think the stickmen are so much more awesome and the fact that you can't get them back is SO FUCKED UP#and lowkey one of the things that got me thinking about Jump Forever Definitive Edition#kat and ana are awesome the stickmen just resonate with me deep in my soul#i'm not proofreading this i'm just hoping it sounds good. really putting the “diary” in “dev diary”#man. im so glad michael is the hypothetical ideal viewer. because that means he's reading all the tags too#hi michael! ur the best :)#scheduling this for saturday at noon (it is currently friday at 4:30 am)#i hope i get the chance to write the next one (about that 2D platformer tutorial!) before like. monday.#god knows i'm not doing my homework lmaooo#when's my next therapy appointment?#that's crazy deep lore we can't get into that on post 2 (honestly post 1)#but it's okay because nobody reads the tags#and that's not even considering that nobody is ever gonna read this post. ever.#besides michael.#but michael knows all about that ;)#or maybe he doesn't... and it's a sexy mystery?#my my i am such an enigma#okay fuck i can't keep adding tags i need to sleep#i really hope tags are collapsed by default or michael's timeline is gonna be in shambles
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diluc33rpm · 1 year ago
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the romance/relationship system in bg3 is genuinely some of the worst designed shit i've ever seen in any game with that feature but at least the memes we get out of it are funny. once saw someone comment something along the lines of 'patch note: waving at gale will no longer cause him to buy a house for the two of you to retire in' and i've never recovered since
#i love gale he doesn't deserve (most of) the incel slander#but it's painfully such a good riff because it really really does feel like that#the player choices being a b/w alternation between 'hey there' and 'YOU SHOULD KILL YOURSELF... NOW!' normally is already comical as is#the fact that it carries over into interactions with the party members who you're presumably trying to be close with is... something else#and what makes it worse is it ISN'T jokey hyperbole. anyone remember 'send a mental image of you kissing him or HIS HEAD ON A PIKE.' c'mon#trying to chat and vibe at the refugee camp celebration and the sum of conversation i get is one (1) line asking how they're doing#because going any further than that elicits marking you down for the path of boning take it or leave it#it's genuinely so hard to get to feel like you can deepen a relationship with the characters in ways that aren't trying to pursue them#yes! halsin! i really want to know you better! i just don't want the ass!! why is trying to hit the only option other than up and leaving!!#99% of the time i expect nothing from media creators in terms of writing interactive relationships#larian are beyond parody in that they've somehow managed to do worse than the already suboptimal majority#we're just going to impose the roadblock of do you want to fuck y/n right off the bat. good luck finding a way to talk around that if not#the obscuration surrounding where exactly the checks are really does not help at all either#when the shit's got even the allos complaining about it you know it's BAD#shame because i was excited for character scenes given that's a lot of what's hyped up about the game#but no it's all just the romances. 'what if i'd like to breathe in someone's general direction-' well now have you heard of our romances?#fish fear them party members fear them and tav is going to have to walk alone on this sinful earth#conservative bigoted relative at the family reunion withers era was a fucking time before they tweaked that line speaking of#just so crazy they can get away with this shit#baldur's gate 3#bg3 liveblog
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laugtherhyena · 6 months ago
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Playing Bomb rush cyberfunk has been a crazy experience so far because i feel like I've been enjoying the game just as much as I'm not doing so
#which is crazy because i went in with the impression that this would be jet set radio but better#and really? the biggest thing is doing for me rn is making me wanna play old-school Jet set radio again#who the fuck looked at Jsr and thought “Hey you know what would make this game even better? 300 different inputs”#which makes it impossible for me to play this solely on the controler (the main way i play games since i suck ass at the keyboard)#because it just doesn't have that many buttons#so at times i gotta be fucking double welding this shit with both the keyboard and the controler and it's awful#because I don't have that good of a motor coordination or whatever the proper term is#on top of that. why did we need a fighting mechanic? that's so fucking unnecessary when Jsr already had a gret way of dealing with that#which was by integrating the grafitti mechanic with the fighting by having it be the way you damage opponents#just adjust that to make it take more hits/graffitis in the fight and boom. you're done. perfectly functional#all it does is take away 3 BUTTONS in a game that already has a shit load of inputs#and ik these same buttons are also used to doing tricks on rails but like. that's such an useless addition#because I'm not actually doing anything like this isn't pulling a move on a fighting game. no skill is needed. I'm just mashing buttons#so you might as well not have both of these machanics and have the buttons be set to do other. more important comands#like the one to manually continue a combo on the ground after getting off of a rail. i gonna hold control on the keyboard and move#my joysticks at the same time whenever i need that and it fucking sucks#so yeah whenever i play it again I'm definitely gonna try mapping my controler to my liking and we'll see how it goes#unrelated to the gameplay i just gotta say. sorry but the songs are so mid#if i knew how to mod things i would replace every single one of them songs from jsf and jsrf. absolutely no doubt about it#like the songs in the jsr games are so unique and distinct from one another. even the ones that have a similar style. which makes them#incredibly memorable like i still remember a good chunk of them from the top of my head and i haven't played that game in months#bomb rush cyberfun songs just feel so samey and forgettable#a similar thing can be said for the environment designs and especially their colors imo#everything within the same area feels incredibly samey and not memorable. and you may think “Carol it's a whole area of course it's gonna#look similar to itself“ and to that i say. yes. cohesion is important but take a look at Kogane and Bento from jsr and you'll see#how despite being the same area and having the a coherent color pallet and overlay applied to it their locations are distinct from eachother#and memorable to the point where i can recall how to traverse thought each area and where they lead to easily#in bomb rush it feels like I'm just looking at the same place everywhere in the map#on a good note! i like the story so so much it's definitely what's gonna cary me through playing the whole game#because jsr really needed more story and fleshed out characters that aren't just different designs you can play as
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ehlnofay · 11 months ago
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in the midst of a little depressive episode at the moment I fear and it's causing me to Ponder... in a weird way I'm almost grateful. like this is UNBELIEVABLY better than it used to be, even as much as it sucks in the moment. I wish I could go back to find myself at twelve years old hiding out in the school toilets and tell them that as long as we stick it out for long enough then one day the outsize bad emotions will be triggered by actual definable events and they'll be a noticeable change from our baseline. I'm not ✨recovered✨ and I don't know if I ever will be - I think I might have spent too many developmental years creating terrible patterns and associations to be able to straighten it all out - but it's Better and I'm able to know that it can continue to get better, too. and that's fucking huge.
#fay gets uncomfortably personal on her video game blog. NOT SORRY.#idk it's just crazy to think about#I really struggle to tap into this space enough to remember when I'm not actively in it#but I was SO FUCKING SICK back then. I was a child. and I was so fucking ill. I didn't know how young I was and I didn't realise how#disturbing it would feel down the line#(obviously. you don't lie down on the road in the middle of the night thinking 'I can't wait to suddenly remember this moment#in several years so it can become a sticking point in my psyche')#but like. that's my brother's age that's my sister's age I work with kids that age and it's so fucking young! and I'm so young now!#and I bet in five years I'll be going 'what a small little child... crazy' all over again#but like. idk. I was SO ILL. and I don't think it's like people say they thought they'd be dead by a certain age#it was a possibility for me but not an inevitability#but I don't think that I could have foreseen being better#in such a material way. you know. like I can't imagine myself ever fully healthy#or as close as anyone can get. I've had all this shit for so long. the idea of not carrying it anymore is honestly unappealing#like what would I even do without it. who would I be. how could that possibly happen#but this shit is BELIEVABLE. it's not gone it's just better and when it crops up I can deal#and I wish I could take the me of back then by the shoulders and say THIS IS NOT FOREVER!!!!!!!#ride it out long enough and you'll learn to live with it!!!!!!!!#it's just. really fucking huge. and I am so grateful#peace and love on planet earth!!!!
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wyllzel · 1 year ago
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5hrs into durge run... it's so funny haha it feels like bg3 fanfiction compared to the tav run??? like a bg3 "what do you get when you cross a mentally ill loner with a society that abandons him and treats him like trash" au lol 💀
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latinokaeya-moving · 2 years ago
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treated myself to the very short beginning section of three houses just now but i had to stop n turn off my switch when the game asked me to pick a house bc i started agonising over whether to go w edelgard first or just jump straight into the claude route
#x#fe posting#everyone and their momma says to leave verdant wind for last bc it’s the most satisfying to tie up all loose ends route#and to do azure moon or crimson flower first. bc they work better as one of the first routes#and i TOLD myself ok ok sure i’ll do edelgard first then that’s fine. i like her and a lot of the black eagle characters im sure it’ll be#fun. but meeting claude in game and giggling n twirling my hair over everything he says is KILLING MEEEEEE i can’t abandon him i can’t IM#GONNA FEEL SOOOO BAD#he’s so charming crying real tears rn. i Know what i need to do but man…. pain n suffering …#i remember seeing a take somewhere once that said smth abt how claude gets so permanently shut out of the true potential of his goals on any#route that doesn’t pick him bc he doesn’t get the chance to really establish himself / figure out all the secrets of the game#and so he’s just narratively. barred/locked out from his dreams for good. and ever since i read that it makes me wanna crawl up n DIE when#i think abt it CLAUDE. CLAUDEEEEEEEEEEEE 😭😭😭😭😭😭#also just in general he’s SOO funny and quirky i love him so much he only said like maybe ten lines total but he’s literally such a riot#playing the game while knowing what his entire deal is is HILARIOUS he’s so fucking funny. and painfully tragic even from the get go. AUGH#one of his first things being calling himself the embodiment of distrust is so. it’s just so!!!!! like he WANTS u to know it’s all an act#EVERYONE knows it he’s not being subtle at all BUT THATS THE POINT!!!!! bc if everyone knows it’s an act that he plays around w then they#wont go snooping around as much!!!! AUGHHHHHHHHH !!!! CLAUDE !!!!#im going crazy i shouldn’t have played this i need to finish my last assignment first. n then i can lose my mind over claude#OHHH also can i just say his + edelgards first interactions are SOOOOO funny they’re so much fun. i love their little banter n back n forth#literally iconic showstopping no one can top them EVER#anyways. it’s almost 3am i need to sleep n write my essay tmrw lol
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bmpmp3 · 2 years ago
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so i’ve always been of the opinion that the whole twist ending of Drawn to Life The Next Chapter is wack as HELL but i will say it is a bit of a power move to do an “it was all a dream” ending where the person dreaming isn’t even the perspective character. just some guy
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nicohischier · 2 years ago
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ayaka has the steepest learning curve of any character ever wow
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