#i feel like maybe there is just this industructable wall between us because he is a man and this keeps him from truly being who i need | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

gncrevan · 7 years ago

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i sometimes think if my boyfriend doesn't get his shit together and start doing more around the house so i don't have to do it on top of work and being ill, then that's gonna make us grow apart. i already feel resentful much more often than i would like. i find myself thinking about living with someone else. idk, it hurts. (please refrain from rebl¤gging)

#i feel like maybe there is just this industructable wall between us because he is a man and this keeps him from truly being who i need #i don't wanna think that he cannot overcome it and be better but at the same time i am so tired of carrying him when i need to be carried #but maybe this has nothing to do with gender and everything with me being sick and disabled and needing more care than a partner can give #maybe i am not actually made to be capable of partnership #also i wonder if it would help if there were three of us but also i find the thought that he might exploit that for his laziness repulsive #like the last thing i want or need is to bring jess into this and then she has to care for both of us that would be terrible and wrong #so like in the end i don't know if it is that a man and a woman cannot be fine together or if i just cannot be fine with anyone #i just don't want this

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