#i doubt its broken but ill have my dad look when he gets home anyway

[vampirebiter]

the wind blew the door shut on my finger fucking ow

[marvel-sluts]

please don't go.

request: Can I request prompts 3. Please don't go & 16. Enemies to lovers with Tom Holland? 😊 - @palna (sorry it won't let me tag you)

prompt list

pairing: Tom Holland x reader

warnings: swearing, emotional abuse, angst, fluff

summary: you worked with Tom on set and ever since the first day he hated you. one day he overhears a phone call between you and your Dad, making him feel horrible for how he treated you.

a/n: im planning on making a masterlist soon so look out for it! anyway, enjoy lovlies!

***********

you opened the door to your apartment after a hard day at work. flopping onto the sofa and turning on the TV, not really paying attention to the six o'clock news.

that bloody Holland kid thinks he has the right to make your life a living hell. from the moment you met him he hated you.

you walk into the room flashing a smile to the people in there. you had been chosen to play a part in the new spider man movie. having quite a few successful movies under your belt you were well known.

you went round shaking hands with people, each one of them greeting you with a small smile and a hello. that was until you reached a certain individual.

"hi, I'm y/n" you say holding out you hand.

he looked you up and down with a grimace and looked at your outstretched hand, taking it in his and shaking it roughly.

"Holland, Tom Holland."

the buzz of you phone wakes you from your trance and you looked down to see your best friends name flash on the screen.

you quickly answer the phone and her voice can be heard throughout the room.

"sorry to bother you like this y/n but can we go out tonight? I had a shit day at work and need someone to take my mind off of it." she said.

"you read my mind, where do you want to go?" you ask, relieved to have an excuse to leave the house.

"how about the bar down the road from your house?" she said.

"sure, let me get changed out of my clothes first."

"okay I will be at your house in half an hour." she said hanging up the phone.

you run up the stairs and put on a black skirt and a pink shirt, touching up your makeup from filming and pulling on a pair of boots.

a few minutes later b/f/n (best friends name) rings the doorbell of your apartment and you go to greet her.

you reached the bar and grabbed one of the only remaining tables.

"so, what made your day so shitty?" you asked taking a sip of your gin.

"just my dickhead of a manager. he has given me about 5 projects and is expecting them all done by next week." she sighs rolling her eyes at you.

you snort into your drink "like your gonna get all of that done in such a short amount of time." you say.

"I know right. anyway whats going on with you?" she asked, knowing something was up. "is it that Holland guy again? I swear to god I will punch his nose in if he's done anything to you." she said, knowing how much he bothers you.

"there is nothing that you can do. he just gets on my nerves. I don't know what his deal is with me." you say.

"what does he do?"

"glares at me alot, won't speak to me unless its to criticise what I'm doing and just overall makes my life miserable." you say with a sigh.

"and you dad...?" b/f/n asked.

"same as usual, he still hates me and continues to tell me how much of a failure I am." you say rolling your eyes. your dad was a dick, you and him had never gotten on.

"I know, you just have to ignore him. he just doesn't see how amazing you are." she said smiling at you.

"I guess..."

after a few hours of talking and forgetting your problems. b/f/n drove you home.

after getting undressed you collapsed on your bed, exhausted. falling asleep within seconds.

******

you woke up with a start and checked your phone. shit. you had slept through your alarm and you were going to be late for filming.

quickly pulling on clothes and fixing your hair and makeup you ran to your car and got to set only 15 minutes late.

"oh here she is, finally decided to show up did you?" came a chastising voice.

you sighed, knowing immediately who it was, choosing to ignore the comment you walked to your trailer.

the hair and makeup team quickly got to work on you, making you look amazing within minutes.

after throwing a quick thanks over your shoulder, you rushed to set and got told what scene they were filming and where to stand.

half an hour later you heard a "and cut, great job guys. go and get read for the next scene."

you quickly checked your script and realised that you were needed for the next scene, opting to go to your trailer and wait to be called.

suddenly your phone rang, making you jump. you picked it up before checking who it was, assuming it was b/f/n.

"oh you've finally decided to stop ignoring my calls have you?"

shit, it was your Dad. "hey dad, and for the record I wasn't ignoring them. I was working."

"yeah, what job again? that acting thing of yours? how many times y/n, thats not a job."

"okay" you whispered quietly, just wanting this to be over.

"your such a worthless bitch you know that? even your Mum thought that before she died. it was probably you who killed her. admit it y/n. you killed her." he said, trying to press your buttons.

"how many times Dad, the doctors said that she died of a heart attack. it wasn't me." you say.

"pfft, your just covering for yourself. how about you buy me a new house to make up for it?"

"Dad, I just bought you a new house, and a new car. surely you can't need anything bigger." you say, knowing he is just using you but feeling guilty for saying no nevertheless.

"well I want new house, maybe somewhere by the sea. or some big mansion." he said.

"but Dad i was planning on giving some of that money to charity and the rest was going to s/n (siblings name) school fund. so that they can go to a good school."

"fuck s/n, I want a new house. and if you don't then you really would be as fucking annoying as your mother. your no good for anything." he said, hanging up the phone.

a tear trickled down your face. you should have known all he wanted was a new house, new car. why not get a new fucking kid while he's at it. you bought him a new car last month and a new house the month before that, surely he doesn't need another one.

a knock was heard on the door of the trailer that you had accidentally left open. you spun around to see Tom, worry etched across his face. he walked into your trailer.

"hey y/n, are you okay?" he asked, putting a hand on your arm.

"get off of me" you say, shrugging him off. "why would you care anyway, you've had this grudge against me ever since I started here."

Tom's face fell. "I'm sorry y/n I didnt mean to treat you like that."

"then what did you mean to treat me like because it was pretty damn obvious that you hated me. everyone saw it." you said.

"it wasn't you." he said looking down shamefully.

"look if this is about what you overheard with my Dad, don't worry about it. don't tell anyone and continue treating me like shit." you say, turning away from him again.

"no y/n what I overheard made me feel really guilty for treating you how I did. what I did was wrong and it wasn't your fault for how I treated you." he said, grabbing you and forcing you to look at him.

"then why did you do that to me?" you asked, confused.

"just before we started filming me and my girlfriend had broken up, she was toxic and would hit me and scream at me." he said, tears clouding his vision. "the day we started filming was the day I ended it with her, so I wasn't in the best mood. but when you walked in I could of sworn it was her. your hair and eyes are similar but your face is completely different."

"so from a distance I looked like her?" you asked, beginning to put the peices together in your head.

"yes. you had such a kind personality, always caring about others and everyone else loved you. but I couldn't get it out of my head. I guess that's why I treated you so badly, because you looked so much like her."

"Tom you could have just said something, I would have understood." you say, looking at him.

"I know I'm sorry." he said. "how are you, what happened with your Dad?" he asked.

"he keeps asking for new stuff, I just bought him a new house but he wants another one, and he wants a new car when he has the newest model. but at the same time he's always telling me how worthless and stupid I am, and how this acting thing isn't a proper job." you say, "maybe I'm just being selfish."

"no y/n, your not being selfish. I heard what you wanted to put that money towards instead of buying him stuff that he doesn't need. a selfish person wouldn't give to charity and help with paying for s/n schooling."

"are you sure?" you asked, doubt seeping in.

"very sure." he said, "is there anything you need, I could say that you are ill or something, give you some time to think over what happened with your Dad?"

"no I'm okay." you say.

"how about you come round to mine after work, we could talk everything out."

"yeah okay, I'd like that."

******

after filming was over, you drove over to Tom's apartment. he answered the door quickly and let you in.

you sat down on his sofa and admired the little things he had "borrowed" from the sets of different movies.

"do you want a drink?" he called from the kitchen.

"can I have a f/d (favourite drink) please?" you call back.

"sure."

he came back in with your drink and a coke for him.

"look about what happened today with my Dad, I never meant for you to overhear that and I would appreciate it if you didn't tell anyone." you say, looking down at your drink.

"your secrets safe with me, and if you don't mind me saying. your Dad is a bit of a dick." he said, smiling kindly at you.

"tell me about it." you laughed. "he's been like that ever since I can remember, he's always favoured my siblings over me." you say bitterly.

"well don't tell them but I prefer you." Tom said, trying to cheer you up a bit. "and I'm glad I overheard that conversation, because it made me think about I had treated you. and I'm starting to think that there was maybe another reason I didn't like you." he said sheepishly.

"and whats that?" you ask.

"I kind of liked you. I still do. after what happened with my last relationship I was scared I guess but I don't want to fuck anything up. I really like you y/n, I never meant to treat you like I did but I was pushing you away so that I didn't fall further than I already have." he said, blushing furiously.

"well Tom, maybe I like you too. thats why it hurt so much when you were horrible to me." you say. "do you just like me because I look like her?"

"no no no, that's not it at all. I like you because you have this sort of aura around you, people love you and your so nice to people." he said. "I like you because of your personality, the fact that you look slightly like a toxic ex has nothing to do with it." he added as an afterthought.

"aura?" you asked, furrowing your eyebrows in confusion.

"yeah, people sort of want to protect the innocence you radiate. your aura makes everyone love you and it's how your smile brightens up a room and how you look when the sunlight hits your features." he said, gently placing his hand on your cheek, forcing you to look up at him.

"I'm sorry for how I treated you, and it's my fault, but maybe we can start again?" he asked.

"okay." you say smiling up at him. before pulling away from his hand and sticking out your own. "y/n y/l/n, nice to meet you." you say.

"Tom Holland, pleasure." he said shaking your hand.

you turned around as the shrill sound of your phone broke the brief silence, checking the called ID this time you saw Dad appear on the screen. you look over at Tom in fear, showing him the screen.

"answer him y/n, maybe he wants to apologise. and I'll be right here with you" Tom said, flashing you a reassuring smile.

"okay" you said picking up the phone and putting it on speaker so that Tom could hear better. motioning to him to be quiet, him nodding in response.

"hi Dad." the fear in your voice evident.

"how's the new house you were going to buy me coming along? don't forget I want a big one." he said.

"actually Dad, I've thought about it and I just bought you a new car and house. the money is going towards s/n schooling and charity. I don’t think that you need anything else." you say, smiling weakly at Tom who gave you a thumbs up. egging you on.

"I don't care what you think, I'm your parent and you should listen to me. you are such a selfish bitch I don't even know why I bothered with you." he spat down the phone. "you are just a waste of space and I don't know how you made all of this money, who would ever want to employ you?"

"Dad you're not guilt tripping me into buying anything for you like you did last time. I'm not doing it." you say, tears beginning to cloud your vision. Tom noticed this and put his hand on your leg gently. in order to calm you down.

"you're such a fucking bitch. I never want to see or hear you again." he spat, hanging up.

as soon as he had hung up the phone, tears started falling down your face. Tom reached up and wiped away some of your tears before pulling you into his chest.

"hey hey hey, it's okay calm down." he said kissing your forehead and pulling you back into his arms.

"he hates me and its all my fault." you choke out before collapsing into tears again.

"its not your fault, your Dad is just being selfish and is only using you for your money. don't listen to him." he said, stroking your hair to comfort you.

"do you want me to go and get you something? ice cream maybe?" Tom asked.

"no, please don't go. I need you." you say.

"okay, I'm right here love. don't worry I'm not going anywhere." he said.

eventually you fell asleep, with his arms around you and your head on his chest. before Tom drifted off he kissed your temple and whispered "I'm so sorry y/n, I love you."

[drreidfics]

Dr. Reid and the Broken Girl pt1.

DR. REID AND THE BROKEN GIRL (Working Title)

Characters : SpencerReid x FemReader

Warnings : Abuse, Hints of Self Harm.

CAUTION // TW // THIS BOOK DEALS WITH MATURE CONTENT SUCH AS PROFESSOR AND STUDENT RELATIONSHIP, SEXUAL ASSULT, SELF HARM, MENTAL ILLNESS AND SUBSTANCE ABUSE. IT ALSO INCLUDES A LOT OF RATED-R MATERIAL. IF THIS IS TRIGGERING OR MAKES YOU UNCOMFORTABLE THEN PLEASE DON’T READ.

Here I am again, on the floor, begging him to stop. There he is again, laughing at my pleas and forcing himself inside of me. Almost every night he climbs into my bed, then in the morning, he pretends everything is normal. When anyone is around, he acts charming. He is able to trick everyone into thinking everything is fine. Well, it's not.

My phone buzzed to life at the side of me. The alarm was going off but I had been up for hours, staring at the flecks of dust dancing around the air. The sunlight streamed in through my thin, white drapes. It was beautiful out. It was the middle of May and bound to be hot out in Arizona. I could feel the warmth on my skin already. I needed to shower and get all this sticky sweat off my skin. It wasn't even mine. I felt disgusting. His touch lingered everywhere on me. The bruises he gave me stained my skin more than the self inflicted cuts.

'Morning Ms. y/l/n. Last night was lovely. See you at lunch?'. It was a text from Mr Reid. He was my psychology professor. Older than me, at thirty, he had long dark hair and deep brown eyes. His hair curled slightly at the end. He was tall and slim. Smart and nerdy, having two degrees and a doctorate, he left his job at the FBI for something less mentally draining. He had worked there since he was twenty-two.  I was twenty-one making our age gap quite small. Look at me, trying to convince myself that it even mattered. He was a lovely guy. Friendly, and handsome. He wouldn't fall in love with a student, and if he did, that student would never be me. He was too smart for that.

"Morning Dr. Reid. Thank-you for taking me. It was a fun eve! Yes, see you at lunch. We can have a chat about the stuff we saw yesterday =)". I read the message over and over again before hitting send. I was nervous as I usually always say stupid things. My low self esteem affected me very much. I was twenty-one, already with one degree and going back to do another. I was still living at Sharon's and I haven't had a boyfriend. He texted me back instantly.

"Can't wait! Need a lift to school? =)" I smiled down at my battered iPhone 6. I couldn't afford a brand new phone. I was lucky in that I only had to work a few hours a week at the local book store and that it was something I enjoyed doing. Sharon was good to me. She helped me pay for and make my way through college. I don't know what or where I would be without her. On the other hand, she brought the human spawn of the devil into my life.

"No thnx, Luna is picking me up =)" I sent but then instantly regretted it. I love my best friend but I would have preferred a ride with Dr. Reid. Our conversations were always interesting and insightful. We could talk about a wide range of subjects for hours and it would only feel like minutes passed.

"Ok, see u soon Y/N"

I smiled, almost forgetting my problems before catching glimpse of myself in the mirror. My fragile, battered body stared back. I sighed. He could never find a girl like me attractive. Not that it mattered anyway. Silly little girl crush.

After debating whether it was best to just find the nearest bridge in town and throw my self off or get ready for school (I am very mentally unwell), I decided on the latter. Luna had already texted me to inform me that she was about to set off. Knowing Luna, which I have had the pleasure of knowing for fifteen years (no sarcasm in there), ten minutes would be ten years.

I staggered down the dreaded stairs, almost losing my footing a few times, feeling light headed. I entered the brightly lit kitchen. It was so bright that I could feel an aching behind my eyes. The decor was simplistic, all white with gold features. Classic business mom who is never home asthetic going on.

       Sharon sat at the island, face absorbed in her laptop. She was in her late forties with short, mousey hair. I believe she would be referred to as a 'Karen'. She looked nothing like Dom. She was short, like me, and fairly slim. He was tall and muscular with broad shoulders. Quarterback star player with the strength to show for it. He could snap us both in half. Dominic is Sharon's only child. Yes, that is correct. She is not my mum. I lost her.

Sharon looked up at me, flashing me a warm smile, still bashing the keys to her MacBook. She took a sip of her black coffee, nibbling on some cold toast. "You look like shit" she stated; matter of factly, her face blank.   '"Thanks?'" I answered with a raised eyebrow. I walked over to the coffee machine and put in a pod, sticking my travel cup underneath. 77Kcals of goodness. All the fuel I will need this morning. "Sweetheart, don't act like that. You know I'm just saying. You need to sleep more" '"I know" I sighed. It was true... "But that makes two of us" I retorted cheekily with a grin.        "Oh sweetheart, don't I know it" she raised her cup as if toasting the comment before gulping the last bit of coffee.

Sharon was my guardian, though not anymore as I was an adult and of drinking age. She still cared for me though as if I were her own. My mom died when I was seven and my dad had a breakdown. He couldn't cope. One day I came home from school and he was gone. He didn't say a word to anyone. He packed up his stuff and  left me. I hated him for a while. The anger within me burned to my core. After a while I felt sympathy. He didn't get the help that he needed. If he did then we both wouldn't be in this mess. We'd be happy - together. I doubt he would know how to contact me now.

Aunt Sharon took me in. She wasn't really my aunt, she was my mom's best friend. She was the only connection to my mother that I had left besides her wedding ring. She loved her dearly and I believe she loves me dearly too. It's not her fault she can't protect me. She works herself to death trying to help me live my dreams. Dom wasn't the child that she had always wanted. He is doing nothing with his life. That is something I will alway's respect of her, single mom raising her child and somebody else's.

I loved her, though she did have the tendency to dish out tough love which often was way - way too harsh. And she was always away leaving me with him. I knew that if I'd only just tell her what he was capable of... What he would do to me when she left... She'd have murdered him herself with her bare hands. But it would kill her. I couldn't do that to her. He was the only thing she had who was blood. Me, I had no-one.

"shit! Is that the time? I'm going to be late. I gotta go, honey. Say bye to Dom for me." she pleaded as she stuffed the last slice of toast in her mouth and gathered her briefcase and her keys. " ...And make sure you have something to eat. You're wasting away!"                                   "Have a good day at work Shaz" I shouted after her. I doubt that she heard me. She was out the door in seconds, jangling her keys and fighting between speaking with me and the ringtone on her work mobile. I heard her professional, scripted 'Hello, Sharon Cormack speaking' as the door slammed behind her.

I made my way through the spotless kitchen Gina, Sharon's housekeeper, always did a good job. I grabbed a bottle of water out of the integrated refrigerator. I also grabbed my iced latte from the coffee machine. It was almost half eight. My first classes start at nine and Luna still wasn't anywhere in sight. I scrambled through my purse for my phone, ready to give her a piece of my mind. That girl would be late to her own funeral.

"You're up early" a voice from behind me sneered. It took all my might to not to curl up in a ball, trembling.

"I... I have school"

No reply. I felt him creeping up behind me, felt his breath against my neck.

"I can think of something much better to do with the day baby"  he whispered as he planted acid kisses on my neck. It burned. I squeezed my eyes shut, putting my hands up defensively. He pushed my back into the counter. A sharp pain ran though me.

"Please stop. I have to go" I whispered as his hand snaked its way up my neck, fist knotting tightly in my hair.

'"Why do you think a whore like you has the right to tell me what to do, hm?"

'- Hello? Katy?'  Luna's smooth voice called out in sing song.

Oh, thank god for her and her timing. He released me from his grasp and increased the distance between us. His eyes were clouded. I could tell he was pissed. I brushed passed him, running towards Luna, who was standing by the open door. I ran straight into her arms hugging her tightly.

"I thought you'd never show." I whispered. She rested her chin on my shoulder, stroking my hair. I could tell that she was staring daggers at Dom and I could tell he didn't care. Like I said, the same routine. Every morning.

By the time lunch rolled around I had had enough. had gotten into a lot of trouble with Ms. Hallows over an overdue assignment and I had spilt water all down the front of my jeans. It looked like I had pissed myself. My saving grace is that they were dark jeans and so it wasn't too noticable. That didn't stop Georgie from laughing and calling me pissy pants for half the day.

Georgie was the kind of girl that you would avoid in high school. Everybody wanted to be her but everyone hated her so bad. She had golden brunette locks, a slim face and a petite nose. Her friends Nova and Ari were just as bad. Everyone used to tell you that when you left high school things would be different. I am sorry to inform you that they don't. Bullies stay bullies forever.

I forced my way through the groups of students, crowded together in the corridors. The last thing I wanted was to be late for my chat with Mr. Reid

"Y/N" I heard Luna calling after me. I could tell that she was chasing me through the crowd of students.  "Y/N. Look, Y/N stop." I rolled my eyes.

"What?" I snapped. I could see the hurt in her eyes. She leaned on the wall, panting. I sighed. "I'm sorry. What's wrong?" I asked. I felt bad for snapping at her. All she wanted was answers, like anyone would have after walking in on what she did. But I don't give answers. I shut down. I don't tell anyone anything. She tried talking once we got in the car. I ignored her and I ran once we'd arrived at school. She didn't even need to speak. I could just tell what she wanted to talk about from the look on her face. I sighed again.

"Luna, I can't talk about this right now."  I saw the hurt in her eyes. If I kept pushing her away then eventually she wouldn't fight to stay. 'Good', a small voice whispered in my head. Maybe that would be for the best. She deserves better. Everyone does. I could just end my life today and nobody would care. I used to fight hard against the suicidal ideations that entered my mind but now I didn't see the point.

"I have my meeting and I can't be late. Taco Bell after classes?" I asked. To my relief, she smiled and nodded, that beautiful smile that I loved so much. She was so easy to please. I smiled and walked away towards room 1980. Dr. Reid's office.

"I love you!" she shouted after me smiling.

"I love you more!"

"Lesbians" Georgie mocked. She was stood near the bathrooms. I rolled my eyes.

"Grow up"

Luna was gay but we weren't together. We had been intimate a few times but nothing had come of it. But so what if it had? We both agreed it felt weird as we had known each other as friends for so long. We didn't want to ruin anything. Luna and I had been friends ever since she opened up my juice box for me in kindergarten and then hit the girl who had stolen my straw. We had been inseparable ever since. She's been with me through thick and thin. I'd hate to think where I'd have been if she hadn't been there when my mom had died. We are and will alway's be the best of friends. In another life I could see us growing old together, adopting puppies and children but sometimes, it doesn't work out. And if you love someone, you have to let them go.

I opened the door to 1980 and as soon as I did my heart fluttered in my chest. There he was, as beautiful as ever. He looked up from the book he was reading, glasses perched on his nose and smiled, he seemed glad to see me.

"Sweetie!" he said, a smile spreading across his gorgeous lips. He's the only person who calls me that.

"Dr. Reid"  I smiled back. My smile was huge and I probably looked so dorky but I don't care. My day just got brighter. I pulled up a chair next to him and kicked my feet up onto his lap. He rested his hand on my calf.

"So what did you think to the book?"

[milstrim]

Happy FFWF! 💛 What would you say are the top 3 scenes you've ever written? This can be for any story or drabble you've written for :)

Happy (late) FFWF!!!

oh wow uh idk hmmm

this is gonna get long so ill cut it

3) This one's whumpy but I like it

"Why do you even care? You're never around anyway," she muttered, bitter and spiteful.

Tony didn't flinch, "I'm never around, huh? I don't care? Well, excuse me if I have to leave to try and keep the world spinning, or because a certain group has threatened you again."

"I don't need you to protect me all the time!"

"Because you can lift a bus? Because you think you're some kind of invincible teenager who sneaks out knowing that the UN wants to arrest you. Knowing that there is a whole terrorist organization out for your blood. And you leave the tower anyway, using your powers as a party trick."

"They're not a party trick!" she protested heatedly. She wasn't a party trick.

"But you still went to that party. You ditched Happy and left your trackers and went to a party and got drunk apparently. How long were you lying about doing that little stunt? You can definitely keep a secret longer than I thought. Though you're a terrible liar."

Penny didn't say anything, the doubts the worries and the fears all unfolding before her. She'd tried so, so hard to be exactly what Tony expected of her. Of what everyone expected of her. She was smart in her classes. She was well behaved. She tried to be what Tony had been at her age; a prodigy. Even though she wasn't.

The few secrets she'd held close to her chest--some locked deep and hidden, never to see the light of day--had been the last of what felt like her life, before it had completely crumbled. Spider-Woman was the only thing that let her know she was important, that she was okay. If she could save other people, if she could make sure that others were okay, surely she must be okay too.

"Was it a dare? Or did you make that idiotic decision on your own? To get kidnapped and Happy hurt and Rhodey paralyzed and everyone else worried out of their minds." Her breath caught. Paralyzed. "Do you think that you can do this all on your own? That some radiation and spider experimentation means that you can do whatever you want, willy nilly?"

"I don't--"

"No, this is where you zip it, all right? The adult is talking. What if somebody had died tonight? What if Rhodey had? What if Phoenix had taken the weapons they'd wanted? Because I can assure you that they don't want them to make sure everyone holds hands. Different story, right? ‘Cause that’s on you. And if you died, that's on me," he paused, but she didn't notice the fear and the guilt, as though he were reliving the moment he spoke of. All she could think of was what she'd done. And about what she hadn't done, "I'm still waiting on the why. Why leave? Why lie? Why trust Natasha and not me?"

"I didn't tell her," Penny muttered, "She found out."

"And then you swore her to secrecy. You made her promise not to tell me, because...? Because you don't trust me? Is there anything that can make me trustworthy in your eyes? What the hell do you need, Penny!?"

"I need for my life to be normal again!" she spat, not even noticing as she sprung up onto her feet, her eyes watering as she yelled, "I need to not be a celebrity! I need to see my friends and feel free in my own home without people breathing down my neck all the time! I need my dad to be here when I feel like I'm dying or losing my mind, like May and Ben always used to!!!" Her voice broke, "I wish I was just a Parker again! I wish I wasn't your daughter!!!"

Tony flinched. Tears slipped down her cheeks. They stared at each other, tense silence that stretched in thick tension between them. A storm ready to break.

She'd already broken.

Without a word, the man stalked over to her. He didn't make eye contact with her, didn't say anything. He didn't even look at her. He brushed past Penny, grabbing the bright red suit sprawled on the hospital bed.

She didn't watch him as he did, staring straight ahead at the offending wall, her breaths gasping. She couldn't think. All she could feel was regret. Her hands trembled with it, her legs shaking in fear at her own words.

Her father walked past her again, the suit clutched in an angry fist. He left.

A sob tore from her throat.

2) This one will be spoilers for the next chap for my Ashes fic, but I figure its been so long ive got to throw some bread crumbs

Tony smiled at the thought, but it quickly disappeared when the teenager flinched, followed by a guttural whine. Nightmares, he guessed.

As he was pondering what to do, his muggy mind failing him, he caught sight of a familiar matted figure. His eyes lit up at the sight of Platty sitting on top of the white hospital blanket. Moving without thinking, he reached out for it, tucking the stuffed animal up to Penny's collar. He followed the action by hugging her closer to him and pressing a kiss to her forehead.

She didn't flinch again, but the twitching and whimpering continued. He tried his best to urge her past whatever nightmares were tormenting her, rubbing soothing circles into her back and peppering kisses onto her hairline whenever there was a pained murmur.

It took a few minutes, but, finally, Penny stilled. Tony wasn't sure whether it had been his comfort or if the nightmare had simply run its course, but he couldn't find the energy to understand which. With the danger of Penny's pain gone, his eyes began to droop again, dark eyes slipping until he was consumed by slight snores.

The two were stuck in the motion of instinctual comfort. A teenager tucked against her dad's side, her cheek draped against his shoulder. A man's head curled into his daughter's hairline, asleep mid-comforting kiss. Between them, a yellow stuffed animal buoyed warmth and familiarity.

1) I just love this scene. ive very rarely ended fics so far and i loved trying it out (*￣3￣)╭

"Boss, Mr. Parker is back."

Tony glanced up from where he was working in the lab, looking away from his newest project to smile brightly at the ceiling. He stood up, wiping his oily hands off on his equally oily pants, finally conceding to grab a cloth and rub the slick grease from his fingers. The mechanic gave the new project one last glance before throwing the cloth down on the nearest table and stepping toward the elevator.

"Great. Tell him I'm on my--"

Knock! Knock! Knock!

Tony turned, a confused expression turning into a small smile as he caught sight of the red and blue figure stuck on the window, waving at the mechanic in excitement. He rolled his eyes, walking over and undoing the latch on the window to let the teenager finally at a healthy weight roll into the room.

"I'm gonna start putting bug spray around the apartment until you learn to use a door," Tony warned. Peter pulled his mask off, revealing hair pulled down by sweat and a bright smile. They grew brighter and brighter every day. The teenager rammed a shoulder into Tony's playfully.

"Why can't a window be a door?"

"Because it's a window."

"Old houses in the south used to be able to transform between windows and doors to evade taxes."

Tony considered him. "How do you know this?"

"Decathlon."

Tony rolled his eyes, unsure of how he hadn't guessed that. He was going to the kid's competition next week for heaven's sake!

"Well, this is not the old south. We use doors here."

"That's less fun."

"Yeah, yeah. Go wash up for dinner."

"But it's barely five! I was going to go out again."

"Should've thought about that earlier," Tony teased. "It's family dinner night. And don't you have an essay due?"

Peter mumbled, but listened nonetheless, beginning to pad away towards the elevator to go up to their apartment suite, when there was the ringing of an oncoming call. Both of their heads turned as a screen popped up, displaying an unknown number, untraceable too. Tony and Peter exchanged raised eyebrows as the kid walked back over.

"What is this, Fri?"

"It is an incoming call from the phone Captain Rogers sent you."

Peter glanced between him and the screen warily. "That means there's a problem, doesn't it?"

"Probably," Tony admitted.

He turned to the kid, patting the kid's back and fixing him with a steady stare. Peter's doe eyes attached to his, trusting in a way that had been growing exponentially recently. Tony hadn't known it was possible to look at someone with that much trust. That much love. Especially from a kid whose first interaction with Tony had ended up in him running away, but life had become steadily calm, steadily trusting, as the days had gone by. As the months had. A few bumps in the road and a couple of mishaps, some bigger than others along the way, but good nonetheless. Yeah, life was good.

Tony liked to think he was right most of the time, but even he knew he was pretty hit or miss on how to remain any kind of relationship. But this--Tony knew he'd been right. His purpose was to protect Peter. And he loved every second of it.

"But if it is, I'll keep you safe. We'll fix it together."

Peter's lips tugged in a trusting smile. He held out a fist. "Together. MacaTony--"

Tony returned the fist bump lightly with a roll of his eyes, grinning as he caught sight of their shadows switching, "--And Peter-butter."

Whatever Steve was calling for, neither would be going in alone. They were never alone.

Their shadows made sure of it.

[justjessame]

The Deal Chapter 70

It’s extremely difficult to get through to a child who has been beaten down, with fists AND words, to have a healthy understanding of how much worth they have in their family/community. That made the questions I had for Lydia about her mother and her mother’s role as Alpha damn near impossible to answer. Not that I stopped trying.

“Come on,” I took the keys down from the hook near the exit, unlocking Henry’s door first. “If you two so much as twitch and make me THINK you’re going to run, I’ll fucking make sure that running is the last thing either of you can do for the foreseeable future, understood?” I am forever shocked at how formidable I can sound standing at barely five foot tall, but watching Henry nod and swallow hard enough for me to hear it confirmed that he took my threat as seriously as I meant it.

Unlocking Lydia’s, I stood back and waited for her to exit. Before she could turn toward me, the main door opened and Daryl stood blocking the sunlight. Well played, I smiled up at him. ���Taking ‘em for a walk?” I nodded and he stood back, waiting for our charges to join him outside.

This time, since he’d been listening to my issues with the current line of questioning, we worked in tandem. Trying to gather intelligence on how important Lydia was to her people, her mother, and their plans I let Daryl discuss it with her. Henry and I were, well Henry was moral support, I was a tagalong that wanted to tag my ass back home.

 I should have known, as the day grew longer, that my visit wouldn’t end happily. There was never a day that ended away from the relative safety of my own four walls that didn’t end covered in horseshit and sadness. Eventually, anyway.

I was inside, sitting with Tara, listening to her telling me all the reasons she didn’t want to lead Hilltop and was ill equipped for it reminded me of how Dad had felt so many different times over the years.

“You’re smiling. Why are you smiling?” She was staring at me like I’d grown a third head. And my smile grew.

“People who want to lead are usually ill suited for it, Tara, it’s the people who are forced to lead and do it reluctantly that are best at it.” I shook my head and then my smile dropped when we heard a commotion start outside. “What was that?”

That, it turned out, was Lydia’s people. Her mother, actually, since Alpha was the one who actually spoke. I stood beside Tara, looking down at the crowd of people who looked far more like walkers than humans, staring up at us as this lump of a woman demanded her daughter be returned to them. That they have two of ours, a man named Luke and Alden the blacksmith apprentice. A baby cried, and I felt my heart stop beating in my chest as Alpha mentions that we are all animals, and animals have babies. As the child cries, she demands its mother leave it, since it will draw the walkers and danger. Without hesitation, the woman does. My heart stops, seeing this person sit this completely innocent and fragile infant down and walk away.

The tears fell quietly from my eyes, even as the tiny infant’s arms waved, as its pitiful screams grew, and I felt the breath leave my body. Chaos, the cries, the mass of Alpha’s people, Daryl, walkers, Lydia- If I was asked later, and Negan did, I couldn’t say how long it took. Hours, minutes, days? I had no idea. Forever. No time.

I know that Lydia was greeted with a sharp slap by her mother. I know that Alden and Luke were back among our people. The baby, the tiny infant that was left to die as a distraction for beasts, was saved by one of the people that Judith rescued. Connie, a deaf woman, a woman who offered this baby to me as a gift as though someone told her that I would want it, that I would welcome it. I look at it like someone would look at poison ivy or the plague. Or I did if the look she gave me was any indication.

“She meant no harm, Jessi.” Daryl offered, standing next to me as I was preparing to take my leave the next day. Danger or no, I wanted to be home. I didn’t look at him, I didn’t dare. “Everyone knows-”

“That I’m broken?” I snorted, shaking my head and tightening the saddle on my horse. “Giving me a random baby because its mother is a genetic fucking asshole isn’t going to fix my broken uterus, Daryl Dixon.” I checked and double checked the saddle, I wanted nothing to slow my trip. “Can you hand me that-” I pointed at my bag and my bow. “The quiver is leaning next to-”

“The table, I got it.” He handed me each in turn. “No one said she was gonna fix ya, Jess.” He was careful not to touch my skin, remembering at least that much about my twitchy little self. “Can’t help but see how much it hurt ya to see-”

I laughed hard then, without a fucking hint of humor. “What fucking asshole wasn’t hurt to see it?” My eyes met his then, hot and hard. “Seriously? They left a BABY to fucking die, Daryl. RIGHT fucking there, daring us to watch.” I pointed, like he hadn’t bore witness too. “I CRIED. So fucking what?” I shook my head and after securing my bags, hooking my bow over the saddle horn, and getting situated myself, I put my quiver within easy reach. “I’m going home. Where people don’t usually randomly hand me infants as parting gifts.” I waved and headed out. Hoping like fuck I was finished with my part in this madness for a long while.

 I wasn’t home for more than a few hours, I fucking swear, when the entire bullshit showed up on my FUCKING doorstep. I wish I was joking. I truly do. I really truly do.

Teenagers. I swear, my dad got off so lucky with me. He might have teased that I had horrendous taste in the guys I dated, and I did, to be fair, but I wish he was around so I could point at Henry and go “REALLY?!”

First of all, he had ‘runaway’ with Lydia during her mother’s demands for her return at Hilltop. Then, once they were found, Lydia returned to her rightful place which I might remind everyone Daryl and I were NOT happy about, he decided to pretend that he was a knight in shining armor and go after her. I swear to GOD, someone (looking at you Carol) had better have a fucking conversation with Ezekiel about these grandiose ideas before they get someone fucking killed.

Which leads me to my doorstep. Or Alexandria’s gate. Daryl, Lydia, Connie (of the ‘here’s your new baby’ variety), and Henry (I came to rescue you m’lady, and oops I have a boo boo) all waiting at the gate. I was only excited to see Dog. And so was Mom.

 I was with Negan, who was listening to me as I railed against the entire fucking last hours of my visit to Hilltop, when Judith came to let me know we had visitors-AGAIN. Ugh.

“Go see,” Negan said, kissing my temple through the bars. “I doubt they brought the baby all this way,” he was teasing, I hoped. “Come back, tell me what’s going on. I love you.”

And after sighing heavily, reminding him that I loved him right fucking back, off I went to see what the high holy hell had gone fucking wrong again.

 The gist was our knight was wounded, our damsel was terrified and not sure she was worth it, and the adults were awkward (Daryl) and super unsure of me (Connie). But at least Dog was unscathed. While Henry got sutured in the infirmary, Connie and Mom bonded, Lydia kept her hero company and Judith got time with her uncle. That left me and my four legged pal, which I was pretty fucking pleased about.

I was playing with Dog, ignoring humans in general, when I overheard Mom giving Lydia a horrible nugget of advice that I felt the need to tell her my opinion on, since she insisted.

“Telling a young girl who is the victim of REPEATED extensive physical and emotional abuse that she should take her own safety into her own hands, is a pretty shitty way to lead, Mom.” I offered, keeping my eyes down as I ran my hands through Dog’s coat. “Don’t explain, you asked me to tell you my opinions, this is one.”

“She’s going to bring it down on our heads, Jessi.” Her voice was so low, I felt like her lips would barely be moving. “Can we afford more loss?”

I snorted. “Loss? Is that what we’re going to weigh now?” I shook my head and scratched Dog’s ears. “Humanity, Mom, count the humanity we cultivate.”

She came to me later, not much, just long enough that I’d seen Judith with Daryl and heard her asking him what our dad would do in Mom and the other leaders’ positions. Not a fair question, not really. She missed Daryl, I knew that, but I also knew that Daryl felt strained in Alexandria. Too cultured, which was hilarious since the first time it had been destroyed during the Savior War.

“Judith is-” She sighed, and I knew, I could feel it. The rebellion of my little sister. Her thirst for more understanding. To know more. “Negan thinks she’ll get it elsewhere if I don’t give it to her myself.”

“He’s not wrong.” I offered, handing her a drink. “I know you hate to hear that.”

“I do, but I want your honesty, and that’s what it is.” She smiled, and then sighed. “We’re going to The Kingdom. “Do you want to join us?” I shook my head. “Should I tell them to expect a long term visitor in his cell?” I laughed and asked if RJ was staying behind for me to take care of.

[halorocks1214]

the law of equivalent exchange

AO3 Link

Word Count: 4182

Just like all my other plot bunnies, this got three times longer than I estimated. Whoopsies. At least I’m fairly proud of this. Another title for this fic could be ‘something that I would love to see happen in the finale but know it won’t so I’ll just write it myself instead.’ I was probably going to write this fic regardless, but @gumnut-logic​‘s #FabFiveFeb just gave me one heck of a push to do so sooner than later. Hope you enjoy!

Warnings for The Hood being the creep he is and no-no words. There’s one F-bomb because I can’t seem to not have at least one.

“No! You can’t!”

Alan should probably be focusing on whatever the heck John was yelling at Scott for over the comms (let’s face it, Scooter, you haven’t been making the rashest decisions as of late), but he barely heard his older brother to begin with. With the blood rushing to his ears and his heart reverberating ten times faster than healthy throughout his entire body, all Alan could really focus on was trying not to pass out.

When his body decided to properly function, he tried reaching to turn his comms on as quickly as possible, but the figure he was praying to God to be a hallucination started talking, freezing Alan’s movements completely.

“Now then, Alan, let’s not be rash. I just want to talk. Is that so bad?”

Hand hovering over the button, Alan gulped down any fear he was wearing on his face to glare at The Hood directly in his eyes. If this was the stupid way he was going to go out, then he won’t be going out like a coward.

Against all of his training and judgment, Alan took his hand away from his comm and brought them calmly down to his sides. His whole stance was taut, and he at least hoped he looked more threatening than a lion cub play fighting with its siblings, “I don’t know, I would say it is considering who you are.”

The Hood chuckled, turning Alan’s stomach inside out. Alan just couldn’t understand this man. Ever. The way he slyly grinned as if he were some suave bachelor and not a creepy murderer. Alan tried desperately to cool the nausea in the pit of his gut as his family’s sworn enemy continued to speak, “As an honorable man even I have to admit defeat from time to time. You Tracys beat me fair and square, and the only way I caught up involved cheating. I was surprised I could sneak onto the ship as I did. Very well, Jeff Tracy is yours once again.”

Wait, what?

Alan blinked in shock before his brain caught up to him, making him bring back his glare, “There’s a catch here.”

The Hood raised his eyebrows at the way the boy spoke his words. It was not a question, no, the youngest Tracy stated them as if it were a matter of fact. The Hood’s smile grew wide, “You’re always quick on the uptake, Alan. Even if I lost this race, I did come out all this way. I can’t leave with nothing, not after all the time and effort I gave up. Surely, you understand that?”

Chills fled down Alan’s spine at the speed of the Zero-X. The gleam in The Hood’s eyes slowly morphed into hunger, like a starving lion about to make a move on an ill and weak zebra. Alan was pretty damn sure he wasn’t weak nor ill, and he didn’t feel like growing black and white stripes at the moment.

The Hood stood to his full height, “Have you ever heard of the saying “An Eye for an Eye”?”

Alan’s glare dropped off his face and went right back to the wide-eyed fear he had at the start, making him look a few years younger than he was. Screw looking fierce, he needed help. He needed his brothers.

Once again, he reached to get to his comms. Even if it were only one word, one second, one yelp of pain or fear, his brothers would realize something was wrong and come running. He hated it, occasionally, how he would always be seen as the baby, but if it meant getting home and away from this freak, then Alan was willing to be swaddled and rocked to sleep as much as his older brothers wanted.

However, that familiar cold voice spoke out once again, somehow stopping time itself in the process.

“Ah ah ah, Tracy, I thought I told you to be careful with that thing.”

Alan was breathing heavy, minute trembles beginning to show, “G-Give me one good reason I shouldn’t, you m-monster.”

The Hood’s grin turned playful as if what Alan wasn’t getting was supposed to be obvious, “Have you been listening to your brothers’ predicament at all?”

What did that mean?! Shaking his head, Alan, much to his displeasure, started to completely ignore The Hood so he could turn up his comms to listen. Crap, he forgot about why they were even out here! Why haven’t they finished the mission? Why haven’t they been able to find Dad? From the way The Hood was talking, Alan figured the older man was going to let the teenager writhe in agony as he listened to whatever he’d been missing.

Suddenly, a new, semi-unfamiliar voice boomed through Scott’s side of the comms.

“--head that way. If Johnny’s calculations are correct, it should be the path of least resistance.”

That was followed by a louder Scott responding with, “Yes, Father.”

Continued and ended with Virgil stating, “Lead the way, Dad.”

Alan blinked a few times again, the hand he was holding up over the comms suddenly very heavy and stuck in place. Even if he wanted to, he couldn’t find it in himself to contact his brothers for help. That was-- it was--

The Hood gleamed with anticipation at the recognition in Alan’s eyes, “If I can’t leave with anything, no one is. I’m positive you don’t want to be the one to ruin this for the rest of your family, do you?”

Ask Alan and he could very easily explain to you that his life could be broken into two parts. The parts had very simple descriptors too: With Dad and Without.

The Zero-X went up in flames before Alan was even ten-years-old, leaving a broken family and a confused child. A child that reacted like any other kid to losing a parent so young. He was sad and scared and for a while he just wanted his Dad to come back, even though his little mind knew it wasn’t possible.

But as the years went on, Alan got used to growing up without his dad in his life. Of course, the blonde missed him, and of course, he would do anything to get him back, but the sad fact of life was that Alan didn’t grow up with Jeff.

He grew up with his four older brothers and his grandma and Kayo and Brains and even Penny and Parker--

You catch what he was saying?

They tried to fill in the gap of a missing father with their own stab at being mock parents for the youngest Tracy. Alan suspected later in life that they did it in an attempt to fill their own gaps and heartbreak.

He would later start to think they failed at that latter objective as well.

That’s where the second part of his life came in to view. His brothers had many, many more years with their dad that they had to realize they would never have again. Scott was trained by Jeff with tips and tricks that nobody else in the Air Force knew. Jeff personally recommended John to the best of the best at NASA. Jeff took Virgil to meet one of the best mechanics in the world at the age of 12. Jeff was at every single one of Gordon’s swim meets to cheer him on.

Alan remembered being tucked into bed and pictures being hung up on the fridge and gold stars for eating his vegetables, and he was going to love getting that back, but he remembered Scott giving him piggybacks even more. John proofreading his papers even more. Virgil letting him sit on the piano bench while the older brother practiced more. Gordon teaching him how to dive into the deep end even more.

He also remembered Scott hiding a bottle of “adult juice” from Alan’s wandering eyes more than once, too many grey hairs for someone in their mid-twenties. He remembered how John was gone more and more, flinching at more and more hugs, only to be swallowed whole by the endless void that is space and Thunderbird 5, barely even being planetside for more than a fourth of the year.

Alan remembered how Virgil got quieter and quieter. Alan remembered the tap shoes, the musical scripts: they were currently collecting dust in the back of a random closet, shoved behind weight lifting gear and medical textbooks instead. And Gordon, his immediate older brother, his partner in crime... Alan wasn’t stupid. He knew Gordon dropped out of college and even the Olympics (after getting a freaking gold medal too!) to join WASP where he was nearly put in a goddamn chair.

Alan has been slowly watching his family barely try to hold it together, and it all started with dark laughter and a ball of fire over the ocean.

His brothers needed their father back, and no doubt Jeff wanted his sons back. Alan would hope he would want all of them too, but...

... After everything his brothers (and even Kayo and Brains and Grandma) have given up, surely Alan could give back, even if it’s just this one thing? Besides, Alan would hate himself forever if he was the reason they couldn’t complete their mission. He tends to feel that way on a failed missions anyway.

Yeah, right, the mission objective: get Dad back. Think of the mission, think of the mission. If that mantra was the only thing that was going to keep him convinced he was doing the right thing, then only he and The Hood would know.

Alan’s voice was breathy. It felt like if he spoke too loud the blood in his ears would make one final rush to try and bring him to la-la land, “... Do you promise?”

The Hood blinked and raised one eyebrow in a motion that spoke, ‘What did you just say? I wasn’t listening that hard in the first place.’

Alan’s trembling was more than minute, yet he forced his voice to be firm and steady this time. His glare was back to being fierce, and the fire in his eyes was redder than his ‘Bird. He enunciated just about every other consonant in his words, “If I go with you, do you promise to never go after them again? Because I know there’s no point in going with you if you just keep chasing them.”

The Hood stared blankly for a moment before his typical, creepy demeanor came back. With a few chuckles that brought physical bile up Alan’s throat, The Hood threw his arms out to his sides to make his point more clear, “Dear Alan, if you come with me there’s no point in doing so. There’s nothing I could do that could be worse.”

Jeez, way to kick a guy while he’s down. Alan flinched but continued to hold his head high, “I want your word.”

The Hood thinned his lips in disappointment. He still complied with Alan in the end, “Once you agree to come with me, I’ll take away what’s disrupting your unique vessel, leave your family alone for the rest of their lives, and then we’ll ‘get the heck out of dodge’ as you all say.”

Ew, that one was bad. He bet The Hood made it bad on purpose, the prick. Alan inhaled before exhaling the longest breath of his life, “Fine. Then you have a deal.” Like a true gentleman (Penny would be proud, right?), Alan held his hand out, initiating a handshake to seal the deal.

Then, suddenly, his watch started ringing. On the hand he was holding out. Alan found himself hating that noise for the first time in his life. Panicking, Alan made sure the hologram that appeared was himself and himself only, “H-Hey, brother! Did you find Dad yet?”

A familiar mop of ginger hair floated in between him and The Hood. Raising an eyebrow, John playfully rolled his eyes at his younger brother’s antics. Yes, let Alan play a little bit. They did just do the impossible, after all, “Actually, Alan, we did. Scotty and Virg are almost back with him. I was calling to let you know.”

That smile... the way John was sarcastically bantering with him... the nicknames... it was all because they were getting Dad back, wasn’t it? Alan felt tears mist his eyes. Their family really would be better off...

“Uh, Allie, you good?” Gordon’s voice rang out a few feet away from John

Crap crap crap. Bring it back, Alan, bring it back! “Uh-- yeah! Don't worry, I’m as cool as a cucumber in the middle of July! Hah...”

John’s eyebrow raise was no longer playful. In fact, it was filled to the brim with concern, “Are you sure? If you’re having trouble finishing up, Gordon could easily come up to help you out.”

Alan registered the strawberry blonde’s mmhhm with growing dread.

Dangit, guys, stop being such moms for once in your lives! “No! Wait--” Alan coughed into his hand to clear his throat. He looked away while doing so and then looked back at John with one of his familiar sly grins, “John, Godrz, I swear I’m good. It just took a little bit more to stabilize this part of the rocket. Just give me a few minutes to finish up and then I will be right there to celebrate with you all, got it?"

John contemplated his brother’s words before conceding. Alan was a trained member of IR. His judgment could even be better than theirs sometimes, “Okay.” John leaned his head out of the hologram for a moment before leaning back in with a cheeky grin, “Hey, don’t let Scott know I told you this, but if you want to rush your diagnostics, go ahead. I won’t blame you.”

Alan felt himself snickering along with Gordon. Yeah, this was the right thing to do, “FAB, Johnny, my lips are sealed.”

With a wave, John cut his video feed, leaving Alan in utter silence. Letting out a sigh of relief, Alan let his arms fall to his sides. Everything was going to be okay. Dad was back and could pilot the Zero-X in his place, his brothers would get back a vital part of their childhoods, The Hood would leave his family alone (Kayo would thank him for that one if she could), and things would go back to what it once was.

... He felt really dirty. He abused John’s trust for a reason his older brothers were going to hate themselves for. Alan was allowed to feel regret, right? Because--

Suddenly, Alan felt an arm around his shoulders bringing his tiny body to be closer to someone else. Okay, Alan wants to take it back, this is awful! God, he might genuinely throw up-- John wait--

“Aw, don’t be like that,” The Hood stated coyly, “After all, it appears we will have plenty of time to get to know one another. Better sooner than later, right?” The laughter that rung out in the room sounded like it came from an 80s sitcom dad.

Sweating bullets, Alan grinned in a way even a literal brick wall would know it was forced. So this is what it's like to walk into the pits of hell, good to know.

---

Scott couldn’t really describe what he was feeling at the moment.

The best word he could come up with was elation because holy fuck:

Dad was finally back.

When he stepped into the cockpit with the rest of his family, the world turned upside down, and in a good way. The first to leap out of his seat was Gordon, of course, but also with tears streaming down his face as he flung himself into his father’s arms for the first time in nearly a decade. Scott couldn’t remember for the life of him the last time Gordon genuinely cried. And he meant genuine, I can’t believe this is happening tears, not Gordon, it’s a fictional movie-- But they’re still puppies, Scott! tears.

Slowly stepping back, Gordon moved out of the way for John, who finally initiated a hug himself with no need for bribery, no need for Scott to promise there’s no ulterior motive behind a goddamn hug. John started talking about what he could add to his room back on the island now that I’ll be down more often and Scott thought himself would burst into tears.

Then there was Virgil. Oh, Virgil, who had the best teddy bear hugs in the entire galaxy, was holding back when it came to his dad as if the middle Tracy squeezed too hard the image in front of him would shatter into itty bitty little pieces that he couldn’t put back together again.

And Scott? Scott felt like he could finally breathe again. His dad being back meant he didn’t have to shoulder, well, everything in their lives anymore. At least, not like before. No more needing to be at every Tracy Industries conference, no more needing to be the constant head of IR relations. Sure, Scott wasn’t going to just drop it all, he’s not an asshole, but one day it’ll be a co-piloted effort, in a sense.

It was also going to be nice to just have an extra head around the house, for more than one reason. Chores won’t be so abundant, Grandma might not cook as often, Scott also needed help getting Alan a geography tutor of some kind, and their dad was always incredible at--

Oh, shit. Wait, where was Alan?

Scott bounded toward his four family members who were currently laughing as if nothing were wrong anymore, “Guys, where’s Alan?”

Both Virgil and Jeff jumped, the beginnings of guilt filling their bodies. Shit, of course, that should’ve been the first thing they asked! Before the self-hate train could leave the station, John waved them off in an attempt to calm them down, “Alan’s down in room C6, remember? We sent him down there to keep the ship stable while you two went out to find Dad’s signal.”

Gordon was wiping away his remaining tears as he grinned his biggest grin ever. He started walking out of the room to where his younger brother was waiting, “Y-Yeah, considering he piloted the rocket, we figured he would be better staying inside to keep it in one piece for the flight home.”

Jeff blinked. Alan did?...

A grin spread across his face at the news, a sharp bark of laughter exiting his chest before he could stop it, “Man, I knew he would be just as you guys one day. I’m just surprised it came so soon!”

Scott blinked at his father before his shoulders relaxed, “Yeah, no kidding. I can’t wait for him to tell you all his stories. Some of them are really killer.”

Jeff directed his grin towards Scott, ruffling the brunette's hair like all those years ago, “Me neither! Lead the way, boys.”

They all mindlessly chatted as they made their way to the youngest’s location, unaware of what was about to befall the family. They got to the place Alan stated he would be at and gave each other one last look. Their expressions were giddy: it felt like they were about to jump out and say Surprise! like one of Alan’s birthday parties.

Scratch ‘like’, it pretty much was that.

The door shhed open to a dark room, sending shivers down the family’s spine and killing the mood instantaneously. “Uh, Allie?” Virgil yelled out into the chillier-than-normal room. Suddenly the lights came on, blinding them for just a second. When they reopened their eyes, everyone’s heart dropped to the floor. Gordon would swear he heard five different, distinct thunks in the future.

Because Alan was very much not in the room, which meant he wasn’t keeping everything 'stable' like he said he would. The older Tracys wouldn’t be freaking out so much (maybe Alan just went to get air somewhere else? Heh) if it weren’t for the fact that Alan’s IR sash was laid on top of the control panel. It would’ve been more reassuring if it wasn’t so neatly folded either, to be honest.

The four brothers didn’t even think as they sprinted over to the scene.

Gordon and Virgil mindlessly grabbed the sash and unfolded it, as if their youngest brother were somehow hiding inside the object that was five times smaller than he was. Scott and John rushed over to the control panel and ran a quick but effective diagnostics to figure out what the hell just happened. Meanwhile, Jeff blinked a few times before gaining a serious look (John would later call it the good old fashion Jeff Tracy rage) as he went to join his two eldest sons in their scramble to figure out the why.

With a few beeps signaling the end of the diagnostic, John flinched before shakily bringing his hand to his chin, “This has been stable for the past 20 minutes...”

Scott bristled in anger, not at John, never at his brothers, but at the implications of those words, “What the hell does that mean?!”

John sharply inhaled before looking his older brother dead in the eyes, an emotion between fear and anger stirring within, “It means, Scott, that Alan was a dirty liar.”

Before Scott could question even further, Gordon piped up from his search of the red sash. His tan seemed much paler all of a sudden, “We... we called Alan right before you guys brought Dad back. He said he had to stay here to make sure everything continued smoothly as he just got it stabilized.”

Jeff could feel the self-loathing rolling off of his sons in waves. He wasn’t sure how to comfort them, though, as he wasn’t exactly sure how to anymore. He was sure he could have, but that idea flew right out the window when Virgil mentioned John didn’t really like surprise hugs nowadays (apparently, he "barely liked hugs longer than 5 seconds in the first place"). His second-born loved nothing more than to be swept off his feet from behind back when, well...

Plus, he has always tried his best to never be a hypocrite. He couldn’t help but feel responsible, just a little bit, “Boys, I can’t help but apologize for everything that appears to be happening. I--”

Before Jeff could continue, or any of his sons could argue with his apparent apology, Virgil finally got sick of the tension and aggressively shook Alan’s sash once more, causing a tiny roll of paper to fall out of the pocket. The one Alan specifically requested Grandma to sew on for him when the senior Tracy got the time.

Every family member present jumped as they felt their stomach rip in half. They all looked around at each other with anxiety clear in their eyes... but Jeff noticed that none of his sons looked at him. Clearly, they weren’t used to him being there just yet. Well, he might as well make up for lost time.

He took a step forward and bent over so he could grab the slip. Before he could blink, Scott snapped out of his funk and grabbed it much faster. Jeff didn’t even have a second to reassure his eldest it was okay before Scott rolled open the slip of paper and read it to himself.

Chaos reigned when his only response was to fall to his knees and drop the horrifying message.

“Scott?!” Virgil cried out. Both he and Gordon ran to their oldest brother’s side to find some way to measly comfort him. Meanwhile, John felt something akin to a panic attack coming on. What could Scott have read that made him react like that? John couldn’t move, so Jeff bit the bullet and finally picked up the note himself.

John was abruptly brought out of his head when he heard his father whimper. Yes, whimper, as if he were a baby deer that just got hit by a speeding car. Moving on autopilot, John walked over to his father’s side as the older man covered his hand with his mouth.

Jeff registered movement at his side. Not looking up, he shoved the note to whoever wanted to read it. More guilt filled the back of his head. He shouldn’t be subjecting his sons to this, he should try and protect them, but he would be lying if he said that didn’t feel pointless.

No, not Alan, not their baby.

Shaking slightly, John gripped the note to the point of wrinkles without looking at it. Inhaling once more, John ripped the bandaid off and read what was tearing his family apart one by one.

John was suddenly thankful he didn’t eat his bagel that morning. The last thing he wanted to do was throw up over all of his remaining family.

Do you remember what the alchemists in the olden days based their theories off of, Jeff?

Don’t worry if you can’t remember, I can just tell you.

It was a little something called The Law of Equivalent Exchange.

I win, Tracy. I always do.

[punkscowardschampions]

Joe & Ronnie

Joe: Hi Joe: There's no gentle way of doing this, so I'll just get to it, I'm sorry if you don't want to talk about it but you're free to ignore this if that's the case Joe: but I've been looking for my half-sister, and I think its you Ronnie: if youre basing that on a family resemblance youve shot yourself in the face like Ronnie: reload & keep looking Joe: Yeah, I know Joe: but I ain't Joe: Aside from coming at you with what's on any facebook profile anyway Joe: do you know your biological mum's name or? Ronnie: whos used facebook in a decade thats your 1st fuck up Ronnie: 2nd to reckoning my dna is any of your business Joe: who's putting their date of birth and hometown anywhere else? Joe: you were born in [hospital] right? Ronnie: phone numbers on toilet walls getting played out Ronnie: yeah & Joe: then it is you Joe: everything adds up, you have the right birthday, right place, right last name, and first, still Ronnie: right colour Ronnie: miss me with your schoolboy maths Joe: its your bio dad that's black Ronnie: fuck you i know that Ronnie: read my file well before you stalked me Joe: so do you know her name or nah Ronnie: it was in there Joe: Tess Vickers Joe: she is your mum Ronnie: i came out of her Ronnie: shes not my fucking mum Ronnie: id know you if she was Joe: 'course Joe: that's what I meant Ronnie: pick your words more careful soft lad Joe: she don't have any more Joe: I ain't had to do this before, like Ronnie: made up for her Ronnie: & you Ronnie: only took her how many years to claim her bastards Joe: I don't know why she didn't, only what she's said Joe: but if you wanted to ask her, I could set that up Ronnie: if it took her a bit to recover from goin black i don't need to ask her about that Ronnie: got my own experiences cheers Joe: is there anything you do Ronnie: if i had any questions id have chucked 'em at her when i aged out Joe: fair enough Joe: you wanna ask me anything then Ronnie: you old enough to be cleaning out your mas skeletons & seein if theyll dance for you Joe: not what I'm doing Joe: but I'm 19 Ronnie: course she never kept herself stitched up for long Ronnie: got a taste for it like Joe: by all accounts she met my dad the same year she had to give you up so Ronnie: bet he was proper comforting Ronnie: fucking hell Joe: Must've been Ronnie: if she kept you longer than the hour yeah Joe: I've got 3 brothers and a sister too Ronnie: when did she meet their dads Joe: we've got the same, like Joe: youngest is nearly 5 Ronnie: shes still alive then Ronnie: impressive Joe: is it? Joe: suppose so Ronnie: he got cash your sperm donor Ronnie: less dangerous game that one Joe: they both do alright now but you'd probably aim higher if that was the game you were playing Ronnie: shifting gear aint no game now or back then Ronnie: but she was small time Ronnie: that hand to mouth shit Joe: yeah, for years Joe: her dad's debts not helping none Ronnie: hes gotta be dead Joe: yeah Joe: year I was born Joe: so new mouth to feed and inheriting the neverending debts of John Joe: must've seemed like a great time to have more 'cos my brother is only a year younger than me 👍 Ronnie: least you aint inherited his name Ronnie: like i said insatiable Joe: thank fuck Ronnie: piss poor addiction but fuck it Ronnie: shes keeping 'em fed & clothed this time 👏 Joe: gutted social don't hand out round of applauses no doubt Joe: know she is for a fact 'cos she ended up working for 'em, and fostering two poor kiddies in need Joe: what do you reckon to her addiction now? Ronnie: sounds about right theyd left her Ronnie: state of the cunts running that show Joe: mhmm Ronnie: white kids are easier to love Ronnie: its on the posters like Joe: in theory Joe: but this way she gets to be obsessed with you from afar Ronnie: pay me enough & ill come press my face longingly against her windows Joe: I'll keep it in mind for her birthday or something Ronnie: fuck all else you wanna rock my world with or what Joe: Hmm Joe: hold up whilst I trawl a lifetime of overshare for any more tidbits Ronnie: she aint rotting by the roadside or ashes i can snort means my hearts already broken Ronnie: take your time Joe: sorry to disappoint Joe: suppose by the time you got to your file, it told you she'd run away from Liverpool, yeah? Ronnie: bullshit are you Ronnie: youre loving having another cunt to share it with Ronnie: whats the matter dont your brothers & sister wanna play Joe: I'm the favourite Joe: favourite that's about Joe: they got the gist but no file for them Ronnie: 💔 Joe: you said Joe: so, what you saying, you care if I tell her I found you or what? Ronnie: if it feels good do it baby Ronnie: why would i care Ronnie: shes not gonna show up Joe: what if she did? Ronnie: no fixed address Joe: I've told you she loves a cause Joe: say you don't wanna see her Ronnie: shooting the messenger aint no kill shot Ronnie: youre not invested in me Joe: I'm not not, clearly Joe: I'm the one looking, ain't I Ronnie: let her look under every rock with you Ronnie: i hope one bashes her skull in Joe: alright Joe: I'll pass it on Ronnie: good boy Ronnie: get that sticker on your reward chart Joe: god I hope so Ronnie: 🙏 Joe: Your profile says you're in London, still true? Ronnie: i don't need you at my door either Joe: 🙄 Ronnie: roll your eyes at me again Joe: 🙄🙄 Ronnie: 🖕🖕 Joe: 😏 Ronnie: what the fuck do you want Joe: I've told you Ronnie: nah Ronnie: spit it out Ronnie: youre circling around it stop being a pussy Joe: how am I? Ronnie: what do you want for fucks sake Joe: meet you Ronnie: its not happening Joe: why not Ronnie: i hate that you exist Ronnie: that she got a 2nd chance & i didnt get 1 Joe: that's fair Joe: you can hate me in person Ronnie: i aint goin to prison for killing you Ronnie: you wish Joe: yeah Joe: oh well Ronnie: take your death wish home Ronnie: or on a different part of the internet Joe: awh, cheers for the sisterly advice Ronnie: shut your mouth Ronnie: i ain't your sister Joe: kk Ronnie: dumping all your bullshit on me dont make us related Joe: we are Joe: you not wanting it don't fight biology Ronnie: her not wanting me cancels it all out Joe: not to me Ronnie: i give a shit how you feel Ronnie: youre a stranger with fuck all i want Joe: you ain't checked what I've got Ronnie: until facebook adds income i dont care Joe: 💔 Ronnie: you must look like your da Ronnie: dont be Joe: well you look like her Joe: not that I've seen yours Ronnie: fuck off Ronnie: i dont Joe: yeah you do Joe: [sends pics] Ronnie: shut up Joe: alright Joe: catch you around then Ronnie: get it through your head Ronnie: you wont Joe: what you scared for Ronnie: youre having fun trying to mess me up Ronnie: that aint how i get mine Joe: I'm seriously not Joe: I've got the message though, alright Ronnie: youre seriously throwing all this shit at me like im gonna smile as i eat it Ronnie: what the fuck Joe: I don't expect fuck all Joe: I just wanna know you but if you don't then that's alright Joe: I won't message again Ronnie: bullshit Ronnie: you aint asked about me Ronnie: you wanna bitch about 'em Joe: that's why I wanna meet you Joe: I've thrown enough questions at you for one convo Ronnie: nah you wanna meet me to see if i proper look like her Joe: I've got eyes Ronnie: if thats what you reckon you see they dont fucking work Ronnie: get down the social & claim Joe: you're fine, its not dead ringer levels Ronnie: im fucking fine cause theres none of her in me Joe: I'm glad for you Ronnie: were not family save your lies Ronnie: i dont need any blows softened Joe: its only me bitching Ronnie: yeah Ronnie: & you can save your tears Ronnie: you already cant see fuck all like Joe: what do you want? Ronnie: too late to give a fuck Ronnie: youve shit over me with this Joe: I'm sorry Ronnie: nah Ronnie: sorry for yourself aint the same Joe: Why would I be sorry for me? Joe: I got everything Ronnie: not how youre framing it Joe: why would you believe me Ronnie: not hard to believe mummy dearest loves me best Ronnie: not like she dumped me fast as she could & legged it Joe: she weren't allowed to keep you, she was 14 with a junkie non-dad to look after you both Ronnie: & what she didnt get any older or get her shit together Ronnie: fuck that Joe: did you want her to come 'round and pick you up 4 years later? Ronnie: she had you cunts instead Joe: so she comes and gets you and the social come with and see the fake bailiffs and the bashed in door and we all go back with you Joe: I see the appeal Ronnie: you reckon i had it better Ronnie: thats what this nancy drew bullshit is about Joe: nice one, genius Joe: in what world is that adding up Ronnie: yours Ronnie: in what world would i have not gone with any cunt to get me out of that place then Joe: I'm telling you why she didn't get you, not telling you why you wouldn't wanna be there Ronnie: youre giving me both Ronnie: cant help yourself Joe: they're the same reason Joe: if she tried to get you, they'd say nah 'cos her life was a mess, simple as Ronnie: & yet here you are Ronnie: not a care kid a single day in your fucking life Ronnie: so like i said she got her shit together in the end Joe: she was 18 when I came around and we got taught how to say the right thing to socials and how to shut our mouths the rest Joe: but that's just what she told me Joe: she probably didn't want you, looking back Ronnie: why would she Ronnie: had a new set up with a cunt that stayed Ronnie: cuter kids Joe: 'cos she loved your da the way only a 14 year old girl can Joe: pro and a con in your favour Joe: does she want the reminders or does she not Ronnie: not Ronnie: youre the only pussy walking memory lane Ronnie: aint her looking Joe: yeah, s'me, so why you chatting at me like I'm the one that fucked you off Joe: not productive Ronnie: cause you are Joe: I've gone to leave loads now Joe: you've clearly got shit to say Joe: so just say it at me, I've already offered that n'all Ronnie: fuck you Ronnie: i didnt ask for this Ronnie: she was in the ground for all i knew Joe: she still can be Joe: I ain't telling Ronnie: nah you opened your gob & let all that shite out Ronnie: i couldve been about to slit my throat or pull a shift Joe: you could've easily found out she weren't dead yourself too Ronnie: what should it tell you that i didnt Joe: ignorance ain't such bliss I've tipped you over the edge Ronnie: you dont know shit Ronnie: how does yours feel Joe: how do you think Ronnie: i think you should ask if people have got time & space to spin out before you fuck with their heads Ronnie: i think you should go suck a dick mckenna Joe: why should I? Joe: no one asked me and I owe you shit Ronnie: she owes me Ronnie: youre nothing Ronnie: you dont see me knocking cause im not looking for answers & theres fuck all else to collect by the sounds of it Joe: then fucking collect Ronnie: talk to your ma like that Joe: hit me up when you stop being scared Ronnie: keep it up and ill smash in your face Joe: how Joe: you don't wanna meet Ronnie: dont flatter yourself nancy drew Ronnie: i can still kick your door in Ronnie: be like the baliffs are back Ronnie: you can revisit your childhood Joe: now who wants to go for a jaunt down memory lane Ronnie: you wish Joe: 🙏 Ronnie: i reckon your imaginary friends gotta be sick of your bullshit by now Joe: no doubt, nancy drew Ronnie: we cant both be nancy Joe: alright you be sid then Ronnie: still not gonna kill you baby Ronnie: but youre getting warmer Joe: I know, stalked you, remember Ronnie: get a hobby or habit mckenna Ronnie: your little misery boners aint cute Joe: oh I got plenty of thoses Joe: your concern is, kinda Ronnie: youve thrown me into the big sister deep end Ronnie: sounds like how you want it Joe: very obliging Ronnie: unloved kids get it where they can Ronnie: thats on the back of the poster Joe: trust, I know Ronnie: 💔 Joe: not me Joe: never mind, not my sob story to hit you with Ronnie: you only wanna share yours Joe: maybe when we get cosy I'll divulge all the family secrets, sis Ronnie: maybe if you chat shit like that to me again ill choke on my puke Joe: n'awh Ronnie: kill yourself Joe: sure thing Ronnie: very obliging Joe: it was already in the diary tbh Joe: but I'll pop you in the note if that makes you feel 💘 Ronnie: show me yours & ill show you mine Joe: deal Ronnie: 💘 Ronnie: [skippity skip] Ronnie: pick me up Joe: where from Ronnie: [location that's sketchy as all hell] Joe: alright Joe: that should take me 'bout half an hour this time of day Ronnie: im not goin anywhere mckenna Joe: you alright Ronnie: 🖕 Joe: got it Joe: 🚖 📵 Ronnie: important for you to know your place Joe: must be popular with the cabbies 👑 Ronnie: yeah im on a ban Ronnie: look out for my picture hanging Joe: what did you do Joe: vom and not pay the fine one too many times? Ronnie: we taking another trip down memory lane Ronnie: i aint 12 Joe: go on then, what was it Ronnie: the cunt crashed its fuck all to get excited about Joe: did you get hurt? Ronnie: didnt feel it Joe: what about the driver Ronnie: i reckon he felt it Joe: fucked you're stuck with the tube then Joe: 💔 Ronnie: cheers motherfucker Ronnie: cant you drive Joe: 'course I can Joe: where'd your license go, got a story for that and all or? Ronnie: car theft would be a dead good sibling bonding activity Ronnie: but i dont need your help to break a window Joe: another time Ronnie: nah Ronnie: next time some other cunt will pick me up Joe: good thing I didn't specify Joe: tah for keeping me well in the loop of your schedule though Ronnie: other shit in the diary besides blowing my brains out Ronnie: can move it up if you aint gonna shut up Joe: 🤐 Joe: you can keep all your dates Ronnie: made up i am Joe: no need to say thanks, I feel it Ronnie: you wanted to meet up Ronnie: wish granted Joe: I know Joe: reckon blue would suit Ronnie: what Joe: genie Joe: you owe me 2 more, yeah? Ronnie: rubbing me up the wrong way dont count Joe: damn Ronnie: i can do black & blue Joe: changed your mind then Joe: my 🍀 day Ronnie: you got the accent Ronnie: my head cant do subtitles Joe: not really Joe: not proper Joe: some of my younger ones do but they can barely remember Liverpool Ronnie: nothing to be 💔 about Ronnie: its a shithole Joe: least its a shithole with some history Joe: we moved to a newbuild shithole so Joe: win some lose some Ronnie: your boner for history aint that big Joe: you checked what I'm studying? 😏 Ronnie: you dont post about fuck all else Joe: I'm barely outta freshers let me have it Ronnie: dont give me the flu Joe: thought that was just a euphemism Joe: either way, on my life Ronnie: fuck knows Joe: not as much fun as people chat, shockingly Ronnie: what is Ronnie: the shit that feels good is the shit youre meant to keep your mouth shut about Joe: hear hear Ronnie: 💘 Joe: 💘 Joe: you live there or am I picking you up from a mates Ronnie: neither Joe: alright Ronnie: drop me on the other side Joe: no problem Ronnie: then you can go back to wanking over symphonies Joe: you wanna help me with my homework Joe: so nice Ronnie: what are big sisters for Joe: yeah Ronnie: shits fucked up Joe: right Joe: but you can be more specific Ronnie: nah i cant Joe: don't know where to start? Ronnie: it starts with being born Joe: okay, so the starts the easy bit Joe: the middle Joe: we don't have time Ronnie: we aint gonna trauma bond mckenna youve been beaten to it Joe: ah you got a troubled boyfriend Joe: that's cool Ronnie: fuck off Ronnie: you heard me say i aint 12 Joe: you know what I mean Ronnie: not very nancy drew if you reckon im that bitch Joe: we can't both be sid Ronnie: touche baby Joe: 💘 Ronnie: im gonna carve up this cunt if you dont pull me out Ronnie: & thatll make him feel too special Joe: who? Joe: I'm nearly there Ronnie: my not boyfriend Ronnie: dont waste romance like that on strangers Joe: sensible Joe: just carve anything but 💘 and he shouldn't get too clingy Ronnie: whats the symphony that gets you off fastest Ronnie: ill do that Joe: Khachaturian's Sabre Dance works as a play on words and should get him to crescendo 👌 Ronnie: hot Joe: orchestra nerds get all the bitches Ronnie: yeah Joe: you aren't a catfish, are you Joe: I mean, I'll recognize you Ronnie: look for your mas face Joe: fuck it, therapy overdue anyway Ronnie: fuck you for saying that Ronnie: making it go round my head Joe: I shouldn't have said that Ronnie: i should stab you Ronnie: all these pieces of mirror Ronnie: fuck him Joe: you can, long as you keep it shallow, or don't mind swinging by the hospital Ronnie: i dont get my kicks at a&e Joe: you'll have to play nice then Ronnie: youll get too clingy Joe: avoid the 💘 Ronnie: some other bitch can have the honours Joe: or has Joe: don't I seem 💔 Ronnie: dont need to hear how you lost your virginity mckenna Joe: noted Joe: save that trip down memory lane for private time Joe: me and mozart Ronnie: explains a shit ton if the conductor is molesting you Ronnie: but not gonna be the sister who tells him where to put that stick he waves about Joe: Mozart was pretty fucked up but I don't reckon it went that far Ronnie: i dont know him 💔 Ronnie: there was a Moz here earlier fuck knows if theyre any relation Joe: You're more a Liszt type, called it Ronnie: what the fuck kind of fuck you is that Joe: 😂 Joe: actually he's considered the world's first rock star, I was being nice Ronnie: shut up Joe: what, you ain't seen the ken russell film with daltrey in? Joe: have a word Ronnie: get a life Joe: tomorrow Joe: maybe Ronnie: i cant fucking believe it had to be you Ronnie: thank fuck i already aint showing my face here again Joe: thought you said you weren't 12 Joe: but I don't need to come in if you don't wanna be embarrassed in front of your mates Ronnie: i said my mates aint here Joe: no need to tell me why you're there Ronnie: where the fuck are you Joe: just got out, 5 minutes Ronnie: i need to get out Ronnie: move it like Joe: alright Joe: come find me then, make it go faster Ronnie: fucks sake Joe: what's wrong Ronnie: if my body would do what it was told i wouldnt need you Ronnie: cant even paint you a fucking picture Joe: right Ronnie: theres a shit load of stairs yeah Ronnie: i cant do 'em Joe: if you're fat I swear to god Ronnie: calm your tits nancy drew Ronnie: you know thats bullshit Joe: I'll trust you ain't catfishing then Ronnie: thats my next tat Ronnie: all for you baby Joe: sweet Ronnie: hurry up Joe: I am Joe: [show up boy] Ronnie: [when you're just there like damsel in distress which ain't you so it makes it more awks] Joe: [what a first meeting just having to carry her away from god knows where like] Ronnie: [just like we don't know each other but just carry me to your vehicle thanks] Joe: [just doing it silently like this is normal] Ronnie: [since I cant find a pic she should go get that tattoo now just casually drag him along] Joe: [once you get the use of your limbs back lol] Ronnie: [lbr its blatantly someone sketchy she knows the state of them all] Joe: [god bless] Ronnie: [when I know its gotta go on her face somewhere cos #triggered by looking like Tess and I'm just screaming like NOOO] Joe: [my boo is horrified and Joe too] Ronnie: [soz you're so cute bitch and you wanna look so ugly] Joe: [lowkey dread to think how annoying the heal time is on a face tat] Ronnie: [blasting that orchestra bop he mentioned earlier as loud as poss cos yeah you searched for it and yeah you don't wanna hear your thoughts or have a convo] Joe: [when you don't run like you should 'cos you too are a crazy person] Ronnie: [match made in heaven lol] Joe: [🔥😈] Ronnie: [does he have any tattoos I have forgotten] Joe: [Oh, I don't think so??? but he probably would in a self-destructive manner too, as long as they could be hidden like his self-harm like go ahead] Ronnie: [just thinking get one now if you want boy #bonding] Joe: [yolo] Ronnie: [ooh what should it be] Joe: [the real question, hmm] Ronnie: [perfect excuse to be staring at each other while that's happening though cos you can't be moving all about] Joe: [but of course] Ronnie: [Joe can move around more cos not on his fucking head but] Joe: [probably get a cherry or something for the lols] Ronnie: [love that for you Joseph]

[reject-princess97]

James McVey Imagine

I gabbed my bag and keys before making my way out of my flat and then out of the building into the streets on the cold British night. I pulled my coat tighter around me as I made my way to the train station. Although it was cold It was a nice, clear, stars shining bright kind of night. It was only 8pm and my train doesn't leave until 9:30 so I had plenty of time so I took a nice, peaceful walk to the train station which was only a ten minute walk from where I lived.

I set off, my suitcase trailing behind me, my handbag hung by over my shoulder and my sneaker treading along the floor. I hummed along a song I had stuck in my head, 5 colours in her hair by Mcfly.

I was about fine minutes away from the station when I heard someone call my name. I turned around only to find nobody there so I carried on walking.

It was a few seconds later when I heard my name again. I turned around and this time I saw my Ex boyfriend Danny. I turned away and tried to ignore him but he grabbed a hold of my wrist.

"Where you going Y/N?" He asked. I blanked him and tried to pull away only for him to pull back and his hand was suddenly across my cheek.

I felt tears fill my eyes as the sting on my cheek worsened as he forced my too look at him.

"I asked you a question bitch!" He growled as he pushed me down.

I stumbled to get back up but he grabbed my arm and pulled me close. He grabbed my bag and hit me again.

I stood up and, make a grab for my bag but he only laughed as I fell forward. He grabbed me and threw my bag at his friend as he pulled me close and kissed, hard. I lifted my knee to make contact with his "area" and I ran, not worrying about my bags as I legged it.

I ran into a near by car park that was filled with buses and I ran over to that first bus I was and began banging at the door, calling for help until the doors opened. I fell to the floor, sick and panicked over what happened, when I heard someone speak. I turned to see James McVey of The Vamps

"Hey, are you OK?" He asked I nodded and looked around me, fear taking over.

"I..I..I was attacked by my Ex and his friends and I..." I broke down and he quickly moving to help me stand.

"Okay, come on in." He offered and I nodded, following him in and sitting at the table, James explained to the boys what was going on and they ll nodded understanding.

"OK, well, Brad will make you some tea, Con, go find Joe and Tris..."

"I'll call the police." Tristan interrupted grabbing his phone and walking out of the bus.

"I'll sit here with you if that's OK?" James smiled sitting across from me. I nodded and smiled at him.

"Sure, I don't mind" I smiled sadly.

"Here, you can borrow my jacket, you look freezing." He said as he pulled his hoodie off of himself and wrapped it around me.

"Thanks." I smiled again. I heard the door of the bus open and I walked another man, I was assuming he was Joe and my assumptions was confirmed when he introduced himself.

"Hi, I'm Joe, do you want to tell me what happened?" He asked as he sat down next to me.

"Sure, well, I was on my way yo the train station to get the train to my parents house in Blackpool, I'm taking my little sister to a concert Friday night, your concert actually. Anyway I was on my way to the station when I was jumped by my EX and his friends. They took my bag and case that has everything in it, my keys, my phone, my money and ticket for the train." I told them

"The police are on the way." Conor told us entering the room again.

Here, your tea." Brad smiled softly at me as he handed me to cup. I let out a sigh as I took a sip, trying to keep calm. Then I remembered something.

"OH, Crap...my sisters gonna kill me" I blurted out.

"What's up?" James asked concerned.

"The tickets to the show, they were in the bag...she's gonna hate me."

Y/N, you'll be fine." James tried to reassure me.

"No, you don't understand, Danny, my EX used to be really controlling. I missed Christmas because of him and it broke mt sisters heart that I wasn't there. I got her the tickets as a way to say sorry and I promised her the best Christmas present I could find, there was at least £300 in that bag for band merch and stuff oh god, I'm gonna have to disappoint her again. Oh God, I'm the worst sister ever." I cried.

"Hey, it's OK, listen, We can sort out the tickets the show and we can give your sister a bag of merch." Joe smiled at me. "In fact, I'll get the boys to sign a birthday card for her." He offered.

"You don't have to do that, I can handle her." I smiled at him.

"No it's fine and I'll tell you what. After you've spoken to the police, you can hitch a ride with us. Like you said, we've got a show in Blackpool anyways so we'll get you to Blackpool safe." James offered.

"Are you sure?" I asked.

"Absolutely, we don't leave until tomorrow though." Brad added.

"It's OK, ill call my sister and...oh right, no phone." I sighed.

"You could go back to your place after the police have been, call your mum and grab some clothes then you can come back to the bus." Tristan told me.

"OK, sure." I nodded,

"Great, I'll sort you out a car for you to go home and back."

"Can someone come with me, I don't wanna go alone?" I asked,

"I'll go with her!" James spoke us and Joe nodded

"OK, fine, but you'll have an hour, OK?" He informed us and James and I nodded.

I jumped a little when I heard a knock,

"Guys there are some policemen here." A voice shouted from outside the bus. Joe stood and opened the doors and the boys all followed

"We'll leave you here to speak to the police alone and we'll be back as soon as they leave." James told me and I nodded.

An hour later the police had left and James and I were at my home, I packed some clothes in a bag and then grabbed my landline and dialled my mums number.

"Hello?"

"Hi, mum it's me."

"Y/N what's wrong, why are you calling me on you're landline? Wheres your phone." my mum asked.

"Something happened with Danny..." I began but was cut off by my mother,

"I know it, you're not coming, you do this every time." She yelled at me.

"Mum, I'm still coming, Danny and his friends...."

"I don't want to hear it!" She snapped at me, cutting me off. "This is exactly like Christmas and..."

"Mum, on Christmas day I was laid in a hospital, barely able to open my eyes." I yelled at her

"Yes, well, you dated that woman beater, you should face the....."

"We had broken up by then, you know what I'm not doing this again, I have to go. see you tomorrow." I sighed as I hung up. I spotted James leaning against the door frame.

"Sorry 'bout that, my mum seems to think everything is my fault." I smiled apologetically.

"Don't worry about it, it's not your fault though, he's a bad person." He smiled softly.

"I know." I nodded.

"Come on, let's go, I urm, need to stop at a shop, I gotta get my sister another Birthday card." I smiled grabbing my bag.

"Come then."

We headed back to the car and stopped at a shop where I picked up a birthday card, James picked one up and told me it was for the boys to sigh then we headed back to the Bus.

"So what's your sisters name?" James asked as we sat in the car.

"Amy." I told him.

"Cool, Amy is lucky to have a sister like you." He smiled.

"Yeah, I guess." I laughed back.

"OK, well, you can take my bunk tonight, I'll sleep on the couch." He offered.

"Thanks but I doubt I'll sleep much tonight anyway."

"Well, I'll stay with you until you do." James smiled as we pulled up at the bus.

"Thanks." I grinned.

*The next morning*

The bus left the car park the next morning while I was sleeping so when I woke up I saw the a motor way flash by the window as I sat up from the couch and looked outside. I jumped when I heard a voice call my name and I smiled when I saw Joe stood by the door.

"We'll be arriving in a hour and I need your address, the boys are wanting to drop you off at home and will not take no as an answer." He laughed, handing be a cup filled with coffee. I thanked him and gave him my address. He nodded and walked off, the boys walking in soon after.

"Hey, how are you guys?" I asked sitting up taking a sip of my coffee.

"We should be asking you that." Brad smiled sitting by me, James on my other side handing be a plate with a bacon sandwich on it.

"Yeah, you had a hell of a night, how are you?" James smiled.

"Oh, I'm fine. honestly, it's not the first time its happened, if fact I've been through worse." I sighed, I looked at the boys and they all smiled a sad smile before Connor turned the TV on, Harry Potter filling the room. My attention was taken away from the boys as I turned my attention to the TV. I love Harry Potter, the movies and the books.

"You're a fan of Harry Potter then?" James whispered in my ear, I nodded and smiled up at him.

"Seen all the film, read all the books and for my 16th my mum and dad took my sister and I to Harry Potter world, she bought me a load of stuff from there and she told me that I was crazy when I refused to wear a gryffindor hoodie because I wanted Hufflepuff instead." I told him, smiling at my memory before my smile fell. "A year later I met Danny and he set it on fire a year or so after we met. burned all my Harry Potter stuff because he said it was kids stuff." I told him, not being able to stop confessing about my past.

"Oh, I'm sorry, I'll tell you what, your next birthday you're 21 right?" He asked and I nodded. "Well, for your 21st, I'll take you to Universal studios where they have a bigger, more exciting Harry Potter world and I'll make sure you get every Hufflepuff product there is." He smiled and I nodded, not believing him,

"Yeah, sure!" I laughed, "Then we can spend the week at Disney land too." I muttered sarcastically but he just smiled and nodded.

"Now you're talking." He said a bit louder, coursing all the boys to look are way.

"What are you too whispering about?" Con asked smirking at James who throw a pillow at him.

"Y/N and I are planning a trip to Disney and Universal for her birthday." James smiled slinging his arm over my shoulder. "You boys in?" He asked and each of the boys all laughed and nodded.

Before I had a chance to speak up the bus came to a stop and I looked to see I was outside of my house. I laughed as I saw my mum and sister walk out of the house, looking at the bus confused. I stood up and ran to the doors, the boys following.

"Hey!" I called as the doors opened and I came face to face with my little sister.

"Y/N?" My mum asked confused as I climbed of the bus. I smiled and hugged my sister but she let out a scream making me jump a mile high moving back. I looked to see she was staring at the bus and when I turned James and Joe where stood behind me, Con, Brad and Tris walking off the bus one by one.

"Amy, these are my friends, Tris, Con, Brad and James." I smiled introducing them as they waved. James stepped forward and handed her an envelope and she just smiled in awe. She opened it an screamed as she held up two back stage passes.

"Holy crap, These are back stage passes, and a card from the vamps how did...when did...." She stuttered looking at me and I explained about the tickets and what happened with Danny and how the boys helped me out.

"Well, thank you boys for your help with Y/N, but this is not necessary, she does this all the time, she uses Danny as an excuse and..." My mum started but was interrupted by Joe's phone. He mumbled a few words and hung up, turning to me and smiling.

"The police have Danny, he had your bag on him when they picked him up, everything was still inside except you're phone and the money" He told me, I nodded and shrugged having already guessed he would find the money and phone.

"Well, it's a good job we picked this up then huh?" James pipe up handing me a box, I opened the box to see a new Samsung inside. "We sent Dean to grab it this morning before we set off, while you were asleep I set it up best I could." I looked up at them wide eyed and shook my head passing it back.

"Nope, I can't accept this, you guys have done enough." I told him but he smiled and shook his head.

"Y/N, you need a phone, besides, how are we going to plan our trip if you don't have a phone?" He smiled winking, I still shook my head and held it out to him.

"I'm not taking it back, you'll have to catch me first." He yelled running off down the street, leaving the boys and I laughing at his childishness.

"I don't run!" I yell back smiling as I picked up the phone from the box and pressed the home button, laughing at the lock screen wallpaper.

"wow, how attractive!" I laughed looking at the screen, A selfie of James, pulling a funny face.

"One of my best don't you think?" He asked running up behind me, resting his head on my shoulder.

"What the hell is going on?" My mum asked looking at James and I being so close and I looked up at her.

"They bought me a phone, were you not paying attention?" I asked rolling my eyes at her.

My mother and I never got along, my little sister was her obvious favourite, she hated when I moved away because her little cleaning slave had left the house and she had to do it all herself. I never hated my sister, in fact I felt bad for her, she wants to live a life with adventure and fun, but instead my mother shoves her in every dance class she can find.

"Enough of the sass young lady, you're not coming in my house with an attitude like that." she told me, I laughed and turned to her.

"Oh mother, I'm not coming in that house. I have a hotel booked, Amy is coming with me tonight and on Saturday I will be leaving back home." I told. she let out a huff and turned and walked off, leaving my sister and I laughing. I turned back to the boys who chuckled at my and I grinned a wide grin.

"OK, Y/N we gotta go, but I'll text you later OK?" James smiled pulling me into a hug and placing a small kiss on the top of my head.

"See you later Y/N" Con smiled hugging me next, then came Brad and Tris who both lifted me of my feet making me squeal a little.

"See you at the show." Joe laughed as I hugged him and waved at the boys as they climbed on  the bus.

"Thank you for everything boys. I owe you my life." I smiled and the boys all laughed.

"We'll just settle for your friendship." Brad called back "Well Tris, Con and I will, James might want a little more!"he finished, James smacked his head laughing, sending a wink my way and I laughed back as the doors closed and the bus drove off, the boys all stood waving at the back window.

"Well, that was....AWESOME!" My sister yelled jumping up and down holding her birthday card to her chest smiling bright.

"Yeah, they were great." I smiled, my gaze following the bus until it disappeared. "I sense the beginning of a great friendship." I smiled throwing my arm over Amy's shoulder.

"I sense the beginning of a beautiful marriage." She smirked nudging me side laughing.

"Right shut up and go get your crap. I need to check into our room." I told her pushing her towards the door. That was when my phone buzzed in my pocket.

James: How about we go out for Pizza after the show, me and you, get to know each other.

I smiled at the text and text him back a quick: I'd like that.

Before I called for a cab so when Amy came out so we could head to the hotel.

[ssj4]

Sorry to bother you, but I keep seeing posts about a future Goten AU and I keep getting really curious! However, when I try to find links to anything about it I end up at some abandoned URLs.

SECOND TIME TRYING TO ANSWER THIS CAUSE MY IDIOT ASS FORGOT I HAD ONE TYPED OUT AND CLOSED EVERYTHING :)

some disclaimers im getting most of this from an old draft i had written about the au, i havent watched the specific scenes in dbz and dbs that these are based on in well over 2+ years so i dont remember the timeline of events that well so im sorry if some of it just straight up doesnt make sense lol

this whole thing did start out as an excuse to replace the romantic scenes with mai in dbs with goten actually so the truten themes are pretty significant but that aside future goten is a very good boy with a much different personality and outlook on things… much like how future trunks is compared to his main timeline counterpart :3c the whole thing was developed by me and my gf together and we never rly posted too much about it and the broken links you did end up finding were probably from like the one or two times we did but here u go im glad u asked 

I HOPE THE READ MORE LINK WORKS ON MOBILE IF NOT IM SORRY

the big change is it starts out with chi chi getting pregnant before goku dies of heart disease or whatever in the android saga instead of the cell saga, so even after he dies in that timeline she still has their 2nd son and he grows up in the future timeline with trunks.

when they were kids (like 10-15) goten was stronger than trunks just bc gohan and chi chi were there to teach him just a little bit. trunks and goten sparred a lot though so he was able to keep up but never really passed him. (that part isnt really important but i figured it was a nice detail that made sense)

thats when history of trunks comes into play, and they both get really serious about gohan training them. the scene in the movie where gohan knocks trunks out before flying off and getting killed is the same except now he just knocks out 2 kids instead of 1 i guess. 

i feel i gotta add that this au was created when the future trunks arc in dbs was airing, and mai was introduced as his love interest, and honestly in my opinion the scenes were written really well but i just wasnt digging the fact that before she was granted a younger appearance she was already middle aged, like she was old enough to be his mom if that makes sense. so it really isnt a dig on mai at all cause i love her and id die for her its just the romantic plot that i didnt like. so when that was airing i thought “WELL what if that was someone else” 

she’s still with them though in this timeline and she still has her younger appearance! 

the future timeline is still progressing the same as it did in canon, the androids still wrecked the place and no one was strong enough to do much about it so trunks is still set up with a time machine to meet with the other timeline. goten stays back and does his best to protect everyone while hes gone just in case

some stuff happens in between here but skip ahead to trunks coming back from the trip after the cell games i guess! lots of stuff happened obviously like trunks literally dying, spending years in the time chamber with his dad, meeting a whole gaggle of clowns that he’d only heard stories about, seeing gohan as a preteen. hes got a lot of stuff to share!!! now hes back and he can take care of the androids + cell + and goten can catch up and lifes pretty good over there! 😇

during the rebuilding period goten would spend a lot of time with chi-chi and ox-king and still slept over there occasionally which she really appreciated, and he invited trunks and bulma over there with him frequently.

despite this he wasnt present when she died as no one really expected goku black to wipe out the landscape so far from the city, but she and ox-king died along with more than half of the population. (ugh god im so sorry queen i love you😓)

as i said before mai is still here and she’s still the leader of the resistance!

events of future bulmas death is the same as well as mai originally intending to go with trunks when they meet up together in an abandoned building. goten is already there as the three of them rest up a bit and start making their way to capsule corp. goten was planning on staying behind anyways but he wanted to see the two of them off. when goku black interrupts them as they arrive, trunks and goten encourage mai to escape, seeing as she only has a gun and everyone already knows bullets arent gonna work. 

this scene is the same as it was in canon, where trunks tries to rush black but gets beaten quickly. mai trying to buy him time to let him escape is replaced with goten actually fighting him and taking a hit for trunks but getting knocked out as mai did. trunks under extreme stress from already losing his mom today assumes hes dead instantly, (he has dumb bitch disease, he didnt even check for a pulse in canon!🤔) and fires a masenko to escape into capsule on his own 

after trunks pops back in time and black is focused on searching for him, mai sneaks back in to retrieve goten (even though they told her to leave she really just ducked behind some rubble and stayed close, because she wasnt just gonna leave them!)

she takes him back to an underground bunker with other members of earths resistance and when he wakes up she tells him that trunks made it to the time machine and that hes presumably in the other timeline now. 

idk if yall remember it well but i rewatched some of the episodes just for this, and trunks in the main timeline believing goten was killed and mai is alone and he wont be able to get back is so sad. and when he spent that day with gohan and his family and cried thinking about how if black hadn’t have shown up, he couldve had a family too… he doesnt deserve to be this sad 😥

skip to when he’s finally able to get back home with goku and vegeta with him and they make their way to the bunker where he sees mai and goten together! the scene in canon where he rushes over and starts spilling his heart out is the same, with him telling goten he thought he died

they get a really sweet hug moment here when theyre both happy to see the other is still safe and it gives both goku and vegeta some Food For Thought, because goku actually didnt know there was a goten in this timeline, and he doesnt really recognize him at first. vegeta has the idea in his head that this is probably goten.

goten never really had any sort of real attachment to his dad. it makes sense hes never met him, hes only ever really heard about him through others, (his mom, his brother, trunks, and probably bulma has mentioned him as well) so he definitely knows OF him its just that, he doesnt know him. so when he sees the real goku standing there for once a lot of thoughts run though his mind, like, “that looks A LOT like goku black!” “thats definitely my old hairstyle” and “holy shit is that my dad?” but the first thing he actually says out loud is “Holy shit its goku orange” and vegeta really almost loses it because cause any doubt in his mind about this kid being related to kakarot just went right out the window cause only someone related to him would say that

and as you probably know a lot happens after that with them all finding a way to defeat zamasu but i dont want to include all of the rest when you can probably just interpret which scenes were changed  

ANYWAYS now instead of trunks surviving the apocalypse its trunks and goten surviving the apocalypse. thats why its not a really super romantic deal like Who has time for dates when goku black Might possibly be hiding in this abandoned olive garden?? so theyre just very close and privately affectionate

the ending where trunks and mai get to live in a new world with their counterparts is the same except gotens there with them of course, dbs left their ending pretty open 

so that takes care of the story changes, heres some additional details and information on gotens character in this au! 

heres his design, drawn by my girlfriend @ssj2 uwu !! 

he kept his natural hairstyle for a while, but i think he changed it sometime during the rebuilding period after the androids and just let it grow out a bunch. up until then he kept his natural style purely to honor the guy he’s heard so fondly of even if it brought him a lot of mixed feelings when people said he looks just like him. a really distinct feature about his new hairstyle is that the spikes look like horns and i love that a lot !!

and the shawl he wears was the same one chi chi wore 

some personality traits for future goten is that he has a habit of bottling up his negative emotions and has trouble taking care of himself, as hes always more focused on the well being of his loved ones. he can be mischievous and cocky but hes not overconfident (or he hasnt been since gohans death) however in some situations he can be charismatic and assertive which works really well imowhen their timeline is erased and theyre temporarily in the main timeline, goten gets to meet a bunch of people like gohan and his family, chi chi, and even his counterpart 

sorry if this post was messy i wasnt really sure how i wanted to make it look and im kinda bad at dumping information out so if any of its confusing just redirect me to it and ill try again gdjfksjdgsfk 😭❤

hmmm anyways thank u for reading!! its an au we made years ago and we love a lot and i hope u do too! be nice pls!! and send asks about it if you’d like cause its fun to think about! 

[emospritelet]

KOL: Gold tucks a sick Belle in bed

[Part 1] [Part 2] [Part 3] [Part 4] [Part 5] [Part 6] [Part 7] [Part 8] [Part 9] [Part 10] [Part 11]

AO3 link

Gold woke with a start, momentarily confused over where he was and the warm presence beside him.  Belle was still sleeping, and he hastily moved back from where he had been curled around her. At least he hadn’t been prodding her with a raging erection this time, so that was something.  He rolled onto his back, lifting his head to look around the room. He felt better, but still weak, and he suspected he would need to take it easy for the rest of the day. The fire had burned low, and he slipped out from beneath the covers, going to stack some more wood on it.  Belle shifted at the sound of it, watching him with heavy eyes over the top of the blankets.

“How long was I asleep?” she asked, and he glanced at the clock.

“A few hours,” he said.  “It’s just after two. How are you feeling?”

“Thirsty.”

He poured her some water, and she pushed up on an elbow, taking the glass and drinking it down.  Gold placed his palm over her forehead, and she moaned at the feel of it, leaning into his touch.  She was still burning up, and he frowned, shaking his head.

“I’ll be okay,” she whispered.

“In a few days, perhaps,” he said.

At that moment the lights flicked back on, and they both looked around before sharing a smile.

“Power’s back,” he said.  “I’ll just check the kitchen.”

“Do you have a phone charger?” she asked.  “I should really call my dad, he’ll wonder where the hell I am.”

“I’ll find your phone,” he said, heading for the kitchen.

The heating system was ticking into life, and he spotted Belle’s phone on the table, plugging it in to charge.  The battery was completely dead, so it would be a little while before she could make a call. He filled the kettle with water, figuring that he could make them both a hot toddy with the ingredients Jefferson had brought.  He sliced lemons and placed them in cups with spoonfuls of honey, a cinnamon stick broken in half and a few cloves. He then poured a generous shot of whisky over and finished with the hot water before stirring everything up.

Belle was propped up against the pillows when he went back through, and he sat down beside her and handed her one of the cups, setting his own on the table.

“The place should be warming up soon,” he said.  “I plugged in your phone. You should give it ten minutes or so.”

“Thanks.”  She breathed in the scent from the toddy.  “Wow, that’s strong!”

He grinned.

“Should do you good,” he said.  “Or at least it’ll taste good. My aunts used to make it when I was young.  Swore by it in the winter. I mean there’s some science behind it due to the medicinal properties of the ingredients, but honestly I think they just liked the whisky.”

Belle giggled.

“Are your aunts over here?” she asked, and he shook his head.

“Passed away a few years ago,” he said.  “They were in their forties when they took me in, and raised me from around age seven.  Good women.”

“I don’t really have any wider family,” she said.  “Never knew my grandparents, and Dad’s an only child.  Mum didn’t speak to the rest of her family - apparently she married beneath herself, or something ridiculous - so I never knew them.”

“I’m sorry to hear that.”

“Yeah.”  She patted the blankets beside her.  “Come on, get back underneath. The house isn’t warm yet.”

He slid beneath the blankets, picking up his drink and taking a sip.  It was soothing, the heat of the whisky and spices, the sharpness of lemon juice and the rich, sweet honey.  He let his head roll back against the pillows with a sigh, and Belle eyed him over the top of her mug.

“How come you ended up in the U.S.?” she asked, and he pulled a face.

“Got a scholarship to med school,” he said.  “Seemed too good to pass up.”

“Do you miss home?”

“A little,” he admitted.  “But I’ve been here a long time, and I like that the north-eastern U.S. has rain and snow and is cold enough to freeze your arse off at times.  If I’d ended up in Arizona or something, I may have fled back home far sooner.”

“Well, at least you have good neighbours here to clear the snow for you,” she observed.  “I guess now the power’s back on I should be heading home.”

“You’ll do no such thing,” he said sternly.  “You still have the flu, and I’m not about to toss you out into the snow.  The furthest you’ll be travelling is upstairs to the spare bedroom. Doctor’s orders.”

Belle grinned at that.

“What about you?” she asked.  “Are you going back to work?”

“Tomorrow, I expect,” he said.  “No doubt they could use my help, but I’m sure they’ve kept on top of things.  Jefferson and Whale are very competent, and Nurse South runs a tight ship.”

Belle chewed her lip, looking uncomfortable.

“Look, I - I didn’t want to say anything,” she began.  “I was kind of hoping it would have blown over by the time you got back, but just in case it hasn’t, I - I think you should know that Zelena’s been spreading stories about us.”

He made a noise at the back of his throat, a low grunt of irritation.

“Jefferson told me,” he said shortly.  “Don’t concern yourself, I’ll deal with it.  I don’t have the patience for gossip, and if Miss Mills is so short of work she’s spreading ridiculous rumours, I’ll just have to find something for her to do.”

“Okay,” she said.

“I’m sorry if it’s distressing you,” he added.  “But if it’s any consolation, I very much doubt that anyone at the hospital believes her.”

“Oh, that doesn’t upset me,” she said.  “I just thought - I thought maybe it might upset you, that’s all.”

He suspected she might have been offended by the suggestion that the two of them were an item, but was too polite to admit it.

“Well, we both know it would never happen, so I’m trying not to let it bother me,” he said.

Belle blinked at him, and he wanted to sigh.  Yes. The idea had upset her, but she didn’t want to hurt his feelings by saying so.  It was bad enough that she had been snowed in with an invalid and ended up catching the flu herself.  Now she had the hospital rumour-mill to contend with. Bloody Miss Mills!

“I’ll deal with it,” he repeated.  “You just concentrate on your recovery.  The sooner you’re feeling better, the sooner we can get you out of here.”

“Right,” she said quietly, and sipped at her drink.

x

Belle felt awful, the illness taking all of her strength, and once she had finished the toddy she snuggled down in the bed, drifting in an out of sleep as Gold got up and went upstairs.  He left her alone, only coming back around five to check on her and make her drink some water. She needed the bathroom, and made her way on shaking limbs, breathless with the effort by the time she got back under the covers.  He offered to heat up the chicken soup that Jefferson had brought, and although she wasn’t hungry, she agreed.  Her phone was charged, and so she called Ruby, who squealed down the phone as soon as she heard her voice.

“I almost called the cops!” she said.  “Why didn’t you come over? Your dad said he didn’t know where the hell you were and he seemed like he couldn’t care less, so I was kind of thinking maybe he’d killed you and buried you in the woods or something!  I’ve been worried sick!”

“I have the flu!” protested Belle.  “My phone ran out of juice, the power was out… Stirling and I had huddle in the lounge to keep warm.”

“Who the frilly heck is Stirling?”

“Oh.”  Belle blushed.  “Dr Gold. I - I came over to look after him, because he was sick, and - and I kind of got sick too.”

Ruby whistled, and Belle’s blush deepened.

“Shut up,” she muttered.

“No, this is awesome!” said Ruby enthusiastically.  “You like him, right? As in like him like him?  As in you’d have sex with him?”

“Ruby…”

“I’m just saying, this is looking a lot more promising than that blind date I set up.”

“Look, I gotta go,” said Belle wearily.

“Wait!  Are you okay?  Do you want me to bring you anything?”

“Not right now, I just need to sleep.”

“You know you’re always welcome to stay here if you want,” added Ruby.  “No sexy older guys, but I can make you hot cocoa!”

“I don’t want to give this to you,” said Belle.  “I’ll be okay, I just need to rest and let it take its course.”

“Okay.  Call me tomorrow, okay?”

“Thanks, Rubes.”

She rang off and called her father, trying their home when there was no answer at the shop. He was grumpy when she answered, and didn’t seem at all concerned that she hadn’t been home in days.

“I told you you’d get the flu,” he said, when she explained her situation.  “Didn’t listen, did you?”

“Thanks for the sympathy,” she said, rolling her eyes.  “Just thought I’d let you know I won’t be home for a day or two at least.”

“So what am I supposed to do for food?”

“What did you do before I came to Storybrooke?” she snapped.  “Microwave something!”

She hung up before he could snap back, and tossed the phone aside, irritated.  The sooner she could get a place of her own, the better. She heard the tap of Gold’s cane, and glanced over to where he was coming into the lounge with a tray perched on his free arm.  A steaming bowl was set on it, and she took it from him, along with a plate of bread and butter that she didn’t really want.

“Was your father worried?” he asked, and she snorted.

“That’ll be the day,” she said dryly, taking up a spoon and stirring the soup.  “God, I really need to start saving up for my own place! Are there any major landlords in town?”

“Not that I know of,” he said.  “You could try putting up a notice in the break room at the hospital, though.  Someone may have a place to rent.”

“That’s an idea.”  She blew on a spoonful of soup to cool it.  “I don’t need anything big, just a one-bed. There has to be something around.”

“So your plan is to stay in Storybrooke, then?” he said, taking a seat.  “What about that librarian position you talked about?”

“Not much chance of that at the moment,” she said gloomily.  “One step at a time, I guess.”

“Jefferson said the patients will be pleased to get their librarian back, anyway,” he said.

She sent him a grateful look.  It was good of him to remember what was important to her.  She suspected that was what made him a good doctor, the ability to remember what people told him, however unimportant it might seem to others.

“Eat your soup,” he added.  “We’re going to attempt to get you upstairs to a comfortable bed, and it could take all our combined strength, pathetic as we are.”

She returned his grin, and picked up her spoon again.  It would be nice to lie down properly and get some decent sleep, but sharing the couch with him hadn’t been so bad.

x

After the soup was eaten, and the dishes cleared away and washed, Gold managed to get Belle upstairs to the spare bedroom, and tucked her in, drawing the blankets up to her chin.  He laid a damp cloth over her forehead, and she moaned in pleasure, a low, groaning noise of pure bliss.  He had some vivid and arousing dreams that night, and was almost certain that Belle’s noises of pleasure were the cause of them.  Luckily he had slept in his own bed, with no one beside him when he woke, and no worry at the back of his mind that he would embarrass himself with involuntary erections.  Waking up alone had seemed strange at first, and he told himself not to be so ridiculous. He had been waking up alone for decades, after all.

Gold felt considerably better the next morning, if a little light-headed, and decided he was well enough to return to the hospital, albeit for a shorter shift than he would usually work.  Belle was worse, barely raising her head when he brought her tea and a jug of iced water.  Her fever made him frown, so he gave her something to reduce it, and made her drink a full glass of water before he left.

“I’ll check in on you at lunchtime,” he promised.  “No parties while I’m out, alright?”

She let out a soft giggle at that, and he nodded and eased the door closed, hoping she would start to feel better soon.

The hospital was busy, but Jefferson was right - things didn’t seem quiet as hectic as they had been.  He got an update from Whale as he changed into his scrubs; the influx of flu patients had slowed to a trickle, but they were now getting patients with complications arising from having had the flu itself.  Miss Ginger had ended up with pneumonia, and there were several instances of patients trying to do too much, too soon, and fainting in the middle of the street. The storm had also led to numerous broken bones as people slipped on the ice, but Whale said he had dealt with the majority.

“Which of the nurses are on duty?” asked Gold.

“Dorothy and Astrid are on the children’s and long-term wards, assisted by Miss Blanchard,” said Whale, buttoning his shirt.  “I put Zelena in the emergency room. She was getting on my nerves, so I figured I’d keep her busy.”

Gold grunted at that.  Good bloody riddance.

“Is Nurse South in?” he asked.

“Should be.”

“Thanks.”

Gold closed his locker with a clang and drew on his lab coat, nodding to Whale as he left the locker room.  He made his way down the corridor to where Nurse Glinda South kept her office, and found her going through the shift rotas for the week.  She sent him a warm smile as she looked up, blonde hair teased up into a neat bun.

“Dr Gold,” she said.  “I’m so pleased to see you back.  How are you feeling?”

“Better, thank you,” he said.

“I presume you’ve come for an update on the patients.”

“I’ve already been through that with Dr Whale,” he said.  “Actually, this is something more delicate.”

“Ah.”  She put down her pen, sitting back.  “Would you like to take a seat?”

“Thank you, but I’m better standing.”  He opened and closed his hands on the cane handle.  “I’m not sure what you’ve heard, but it’s my understanding that Nurse Mills has been spreading false and salacious rumours about myself and Miss French, one of the assistants.”

“I did hear something being whispered around in the canteen,” she said, frowning.  “Didn’t pay it any mind, but it sounds as though it’s gotten out of hand. You’re sure it was Zelena?”

“Quite sure,” he said.  “She came to my house. Uninvited, I might add, and quite unwelcome.  Upon seeing Miss French there, she apparently got the wrong idea about our relationship.”

Glinda’s mouth flattened.

“I see,” she said.  “Well, thank you for bringing it to my attention.  I’ll be having a stern talk with Nurse Mills.”

“Thank you,” he said.  “I would have spoken to her myself, but honestly it seems as though any attention might be misinterpreted, and I’d rather not encourage her.  Besides, I didn’t want to tread on your toes.”

“I appreciate that,” she said, and picked up her pen, tapping it against the schedule on her desk.  “As luck would have it, I was about to redraw the staffing rotas. I’ll be sure to fix it so that Nurse Mills has as little interaction with you and Miss French as possible.”

Gold felt a smile spread across his face, and he inclined his head.

“Thank you, Nurse South,” he said.  “I’m obliged to you.”

[archivemisora]

Croix Straus was a creature of habbit.  Each morning, he would sit for meditation followed by a cup of coffee and a bowl of oats and honey. Each night, he would sprinkle a pinch of holy water at the doorstep and leave a cup of drinking water at his daughter's nightstand by her bed.  Each time he prepared to leave for a dangerous job, he put on his favorite ornate black and white robe with its matching hat and kissed his daughter on top of her head.  "You're in charge while I'm gone, Misora.  Keep 'em out of trouble."

"And don't let the creepies in.  Gotcha, Dad."  Misora would nod or give a thumbs up and the both yelled "love you!" as he made his way out the door.  Misora, his treasure.  A small and spritely little girl with his own dare-to-dream bright green eyes and her late mother's spring pink hair.  Illness took his wife when their daughter was only four, leaving him a single parent on top of running his second pride and joy, the Sword of Justice: a small company of reputible exorcists.  As much as he would rather stay home and spend his time with Misora, the income would help set up a good life for her later.  The jobs ranged from day trips to the Camp Drybone graveyard and monestary to grueling trips to Ishgard that could take up to two weeks.

Thankfully, this trip was one of the simpler ones.  With two of his physically strongest teammates at his side, they would likely be home in time for dinner.  "Donnely's got the ghosts again?" inquired the booming voice of Soft Elbow from beside him.  His arms were so muscular that his sleeves looked ready to tear. "Seems that way," Croix replied cheerfully.  From the other side of Soft Elbow, Magnolia raised a doutbful eyebrow at him. "If you keep telling Misora she's in charge, she's going to start believing it.  Mag wore a scowl almost as often as she wore bold lipstick. Today, it was hot pink and applied rather generously. "Good, I hope she does!" Croix laughed. "She's six." "Natori's there, she'll be fine!" Soft Elbow said in Croix's defense.  Mag just shook her head, causing Croix to laugh even harder.

Croix and his companions reached the site of a graveyard in camp drybone and greeted by an ageing man approaching eagarly to exchange a firm handshake with each of them.  “Ned Donnely, always a pleasure.  We came as soon as we could,”  Croix said professionally yet amiably. Donnely's face contorted in distress, giving the clue that perhaps pleasantries would have to be skipped. “And would that you could have come sooner,Croix, I may not have anyone to tend to the church by the time--”  The haunting screech of a female's voice sounded from inside of the church building,  causing Magnolia and Soft Elbow to smirk and crack their knuckles in anticipation. Donnely threw his arms up in distress.  “It is IMPOSSIBLE to find good help these days.  Every other lass coming in to help ends up getting posessed!”  Croix, maintaining more poise than his eagar companions, gave Ned Donnely's shoulder a reassuring squeeze before making his way in. “You two make sure not to break any property this time, please?”  Soft Elbow responded to Croix's request with a loud “bawwwhh” and a firm shake of the hyurr's shoulders as he chuckled before cracking his neck.  As they entered the building, three women in hooded ivory cloaks huddled in a corner behind a bench they had pulled in front of themselves for protection, cowering from a fourth woman of the same garb, surrounded by an aura of dark aether and a dulled red glow to her eyes.  The possessed shrieked again, a blend of the woman's own voice with the distorted sound of a spirit's, hurling a brass candle at the frightened ladies and causing them to scream in response.  The ladied turned to look at the three exorcists and screamed again in unison, pointing at their posessed friend.  The posessed turned and screeched at the exorcists.  Croix straightened his posture.  Soft Elbow crossed his arms and smirked. Magnolia frowned and unpocketed a bottle of holy water, hurling it at the posessed clergywoman. “Oh, pipe down!” she hissed as the bottle shattered at the floor by the target's feet.  Croix, trying to hide his distress over Magnolia's temper, gave Soft Elbow a gentle push in the direction of the frightened women, trusting that the large man would somehow figure out a way to find them safety and comfort.  As the spirit's host writhed away from the spashback of the broken bottle of holy water, Croix stepped cautiously closer with his arms extended, gathering a purifying aetheric energy to his upheld palms. “I call upon help from Nymeia the Spinner.  State your business and leave or be banished by force.”  The only response he got was a shambled book thrown in his direction.  Had Magnolia not clutched the small framed woman in an arm lock, it was likely she would have lunged right for Croix. “This one doesn't know how to use words, Boss.”  She glared fiercely at Soft Elbow as he offered a big and goofy smile at the women, scooping all three of them up carefully in his giant arms to whisk them away from the scene.  “Let's just get this over with quickly, shall we?” In his focus, Croix Straus was silent as he agreed with the hot-tempered woman.  As she tightened her wrestling-style arm lock on the victim, Croix recited his prayer to the goddess Nymeia once more, pushing the aether energy to the body of the posessed and forcing the vengeful soul from from body.  “Release your host and return to the life stream in peace.”

---

Ten years, several clients, and dozens of exorcisms at Donnely's church later, the Sword of Justice thrived.  Croix's small daughter grew to a fesity and curious teenager.  He taught her the ritual of purifying houses.  Upon her insistence, she had seen several exorcisms and learned how to mix purifying potions.  Croix sipped his coffee until a small amount remained at the bottom of the cup, too cold for his liking, and wrote a few notes in a leatherbound journal.  Misora took his breakfast plate and pointed at the mug as he nodded to note that he was not going to finish the last few sips.  He watched her make her way back to the kitchen, fighting with the crooked hinge on a door that was damaged some years ago by the horseplay of Soft Elbow and Marvelous Magnolia.  He felt a tug at his heart as he noticed how grown up she had become.  Far more mature than he and his best friend Blaublau Lablau were at her age.  With shaking hands, he closed the journal and wound a strap of leather around it to keep it securely closed. “Can't you take someone with you to your job?” Misora asked, standing in the doorway.  Croix was startled, but hid it well with a soft smile as he extended his hand for her to come close to him.  He stood up and wrapped her in a tight embrace, taking a moment to appreciate that the color of her hair matched that of her late mother's. “They're all on jobs, Sora.  I have taken plenty of jobs on my own.  Don't worry.”  He smiled as Misora looked up at him with one eye squinted in doubt. “Where are you going, anyway?”  Croix dismissed her question by kissing her on the forehead and took a brief moment to look at her face. “To an exorcism.”  Misora rolled her eyes, trying and failing to hold back a grin.  He picked up his travel bag and gave his daughter's shoulder a tight squeeze.  “You're in charge while I”m gone.”  She offered a lazy wave as he made his way out the door. “See you soon, Dad.”

That was the last time Misora ever saw her father.

[indescribablechoices]

Count Your Blessings - Part Four of Enchanting (TRR)

Enchanting follows the story of Liam and Alicia (MC)’s daughter Lyra as she enters the social season in search of a husband. Familiar faces, sibling shenanigans and naturally; romance, all await along the way.

Part One/Part Two/Part Three/

Tag list: @brightpinkpeppercorn @iknewyoudcome @mitalijoshi @mynameiskaylabella @cocomaxley @boneandfur

Summary - Whilst Lyra takes her time in the garden with Bartie, the rest of the Rys children contemplate the news about their father and find companionship and comfort in their own ways.

Rating - Teen; nothing extremely mature, but discussions of terminal illness, coming out, and suggested sex.

Word count - 3089

Enchanting Masterlist

Alodie leaned in the doorway to the music room, listening to the sad melody that was drifting out from within. Drake was alone inside, eyes closed as he slid his bow across his violin strings, flawlessly drawing beautiful notes from it. His glasses sat at the end of his nose as they always did when he played, ignoring how they slipped as he lost himself in the music.

Her heart ached to watch him. She couldn’t imagine what he was going through right now. To find out that your father had only a few months to live… But as always, he had said very little. Queen Alicia had given them all the news when they arrived from the palace, and Bartie had gone to go find Lyra. Everyone else had remained in the sitting room together, comforting each other with friendly jokes and hugs, taking it in turns to go in and sit with Liam for a while, but Drake had quietly slipped out.

She had excused herself from where she sat between her Mother and her Mama a few moments later, saying that she wanted some air. She knew exactly where Drake would go. He was a creature of habit.

He found comfort in his music. It was his way of channelling his emotions and hearing the sorrow in the melody that he now played, there was no doubting his inner turmoil.

There was a sudden screech as his bow slipped in his hand and he played the wrong note. He slammed the violin back in its case, “Damn it, damn it, damn it!”

“Hey,” Alodie kept her voice calming as she stepped into the room, her heels echoing across the wooden floor as she went to his side.

“Allie,” he said quietly, glancing around at her, tears glazing his eyes, “I didn’t know you were there.”

“I was enjoying the music until you decided that you had some personal vendetta against your violin. It was just a wrong note, Drake. We all do it.”

“I… I can’t make a mistake with this piece,” he told her, “I just…” he brought a hand to run through his now mess of light brown hair, “I…”

She reached across and took his other hand in hers, giving it a gentle squeeze, “It’s me. Just talk to me.”

“I’ve been trying to write a piece for dad,” he whispered as the tears welled up fully in his eyes, “I’ve been working on it for months. I was going to play it for him and Mom to dance to at his birthday, but… he’s not going to have another birthday.”

His voice cracked and a broken sobbed wracked through him and she put her arms around him, holding his tall form close to her. He clung tightly to her, body shaking as he tried to hold back his tears, eventually letting them free from exhaustion.

A little while later they sat together on the floor, backs pressed against the leg of the grand piano as he showed her his notebook in which he had kept the composition for the piece he was working on. She kept her hand on his as he spoke.

Apart from his sister Lyra, Alodie was the only person he confided in. They had been close since his Aunt Hana, her Mama, had taught them both how to play piano when they were children. Drake took to playing in his spare time as Alodie practised even more with her mother, but they would always find an excuse to play together.

He was a young man of few words, always letting his siblings take the spotlight, but with her, he knew there was no competition. It was just the two of them as equals.

“I just can’t get the ending of the song right,” he told her, “And even if I never play this to dad, I have to finish it.”

She nodded understandingly, “Then I’ll help you. I just… need to hear it in my language.”

She climbed gracefully to her feet and slid onto the piano bench. She took the book from his hands so that she could read the notes and she began to play, translating the melody flawlessly from violin strings to piano keys. Drake remained on the floor, hanging on her every note as he watched her, his head cocked curiously to the side, heart melting in gentle realisation.

She brought the song to an end, improvising the last few lines to draw the melody to a close, turning to look at him, “What do you think?”

“You’re beautiful,” he said quietly, eyes suddenly going wide, “The song- The song is beautiful. The… The way you played it… It’s something we can work with.”

He scrambled to his feet to fetch his violin, cheeks burning as she smiled to herself whilst his back was turned. He returned with his violin, clearing his throat awkwardly.

“From the top?” she glanced at him.

He gave a nod, “From the top.”

Together they played their way through the song, the soaring notes of the violin melding seamlessly with the melody of the piano. As they reached Alodie’s improvised ending, he followed her lead and ended the song on one joint lingering note.

He set his violin down and sat beside her, looking at her with the first shred of happiness she had seen all day.

“It’s perfect,” he said, a smile beginning to twitch at the corners of his mouth, “Thank you, Allie… Can I ask you something?”

She sat up a little in her seat, “Of course.”

“If the time comes when I want to perform this; will… will you play it with me?”

She felt her heart sink briefly, but she met his eyes regardless, “Drake, are you sure?”

He never performed his music himself, let alone with someone else.

He nodded, “I want to do this; for Dad. But I don’t think I can do it alone. It… It has to be perfect for him. And you’re the only I trust enough.”

She offered him a smile and took hold of his hand where it rested on the bench beside her, “Then I would be honoured.”

There was a moment of tension between them and Alodie felt herself leaning in closer before he turned away, standing up to grab his violin, “We should practice.”

She glanced back to the piano keys, “Of course.”

 ***

As the afternoon melted into evening, everyone began to drift off into little groups, Liam insisting that he didn’t want everyone moping around when he was still very much alive. He managed to make it out of bed just as Leo and his family arrived; his wife Kaylee and their twins Lysander and Lily. Neither of them held much of Leo’s features, heavily favouring their mother in terms of looks; paler skin, dark hair, but Lily managed to inherit his baby blue eyes.

Lily stayed close to her parents during the evening, both she and her mother comforting her father at the ill news of her uncle. Lysander on the other hand seemed to take the news even more to heart and disappeared to get some air.

Lyra and Bartie returned from the garden as the sun began to set, joining Percy, Gareth and Natalia for dinner in one of the more comfortable dining rooms. The kitchen prepared them a small buffet of comfort foods and Lyra felt more at ease with Bartie beside her, surrounded by their friends.

Elias closed himself away in his bedroom, trying to take all of the news in. He ate very little of the soup and grilled cheese his mother made sure was sent up for him but appreciated the gesture anyway. He glanced around at the room, his home away from home in his mother’s estate, letting out a shaky sigh as he thought of all of the memories they had here.

They had been here in Valtoria when he had come out to his family. He had been sure of his sexuality since he was eight years old, never taking an interest in girls, not even when puberty hit and girls started taking an interest in the handsome young prince. He had told Lyra and Drake when he was fourteen, and his twin when they were thirteen.

But as he hit sixteen, and suggestions were made about certain expectations concerning dating and marriage, he knew that he had to be honest with his parents. He had sat them down in the area of the garden that was reserved solely for their family and after awkwardly fumbling through words for the first time in his life, he had told them the truth.

The queen’s eyes had filled with tears as she wrapped her son into a tight hug, kissing his messy brown hair and telling him that she was so happy that he felt comfortable enough to talk to them about it, and that she loved him and wanted him to be happy with whoever he loved. She reminded him that he could always talk to them, but that he also had relatives who could give him advice and support that she couldn’t; her half brother James, for whom he had been middle-named, had been happily married to his husband for years, and his godmother Hana as well; she and Kiara had been together for longer than he could even remember.

He had thanked her, then glanced to his father who was still sat, clearly deep in thought. Eli’s heart had clenched in his chest. His father was an accepting man, he knew that, but would it affect his nature for his own son to come out to him? That one of the royal children wouldn’t be able to be used as a marriage prospect for better alliances?

But then the king had stood and pulled his son into a tight hug. He assured him that he would always love him, and he was so proud that he could live his truth comfortably around his family. He told him however he wanted to go forward concerning any future questions from the media or the nobles, it would be Eli’s choice.

Two years later during the party that had been held for his and Leona’s eighteenth birthday, he made a statement to the press, announcing his sexuality for the country and the world to hear and it brought nothing but love and support for the prince and others in Cordonia.

Eli smiled to himself at the memory, tears welling up in his eyes as he remembered that he probably wouldn’t get many more memories like that his with his dad. His wonderful loving father who had taught him to ride a bike, helped pick out his first suit, and pointed out hot guys at parties for him to talk to.

He snapped out of his thoughts as his phone vibrated on the bedside table. He picked it up, expecting it to be a message from one of his sisters, but instead it was from Edward.

Elias, I’m sorry if I’m being presumptuous or bothering you by messaging you on a day like today, but my mother has just told me what’s going on in Valtoria. I can’t begin to imagine what you’re going through, and I know it’s foolish for me to say but I hope you’re okay. - Edward

Eli let out a soft hum of laughter, shaking his head to himself as he typed out a reply.

It’s not presumptuous. We exchanged numbers so we could text… I’m not okay, but I will be. Eventually. I think. But thank you for asking. It means a lot.

A few minutes later his phone went off again.

Elias, I understand what you mean. I have to admit that I was worried when you suddenly rushed off at the picnic, I was really enjoying our talk. – Edward

So was I. I normally find tea parties boring af, but talking to you made it worth it, for however short our time was… btw, you don’t have to sign your name after every text. I know it’s you.

I know, but it shows care to be formal in any situation. – Edward

Care, huh?

You know what I mean. – Edward

Do I?

Now you’re just mocking me. – Edward

Perish the thought… Seriously though, thank you for texting to check in on me. My family is here making sure my beautiful body doesn’t waste away after missing one meal, but it means a lot that you thought to check in.

You missed a meal? Are you sure you’re okay? Eli, you need to make sure you eat.

A grin spread across the prince’s face as he replied.

You forgot to sign your name. Does that mean you care more or less now?

I’m being serious. You need to take care of yourself. A second text came through. – Edward

I’ll be fine. Just haven’t got much of an appetite.

I suppose given the circumstances that can be understood. Just let me know if there’s anything I can do. – Edward

Far short of you sending me a topless pic, I’m good, Eli typed out, smirking to himself, but as he went to delete the message his phone slipped in his hand and he hit the send button. He stared at his phone for a solid minute, swearing under his breath, desperately trying to prevent it from sending but the damage was already done.

He flopped back in his pillows, arm thrown over his face. Of course he had just ruined it with the first guy he had taken a real interest in in ages. Five minutes passed when suddenly his phone went off again.

Is this what you had in mind?

Below was attached a selfie of Edward led in bed, blankets pooled around his waist, torso bare; usually pristine blonde hair slightly ruffled. Eli damn near dropped his phone in shock, mouth suddenly going dry. He hastily typed out a reply

Holy shit, are you trying to kill me?

Edward replied quickly.

I’m nothing if not loyal to my prince’s requests.

Eli hugged his phone to his chest, allowing himself the most shit eating grin ever.

***

In the room across the hall, Leona awoke from the gentle doze she had found herself in, dark hair fanned across the pillow, sheets twisted around her legs. Her eyes opened and she focused on the figure that led beside her who was also awakening.

“We really need to stop meeting like this,” Jack said quietly.

Leona rolled her eyes, “Y’know, that joke gets less funny every time you tell it.”

“And yet you’re smiling.”

“Because I’m looking forward to having my bed back to myself.”

“Come on, Lee. How many more times are we going to do this before you realise that there is something more going on here than just sex?”

She propped herself up on her elbow to look at him, “And what is this exactly, Jack? Because we’ve been sneaking around since we were seventeen and you know that you’re not the only person I’ve slept with.”

“And yet I’m the one you keep coming back to.”

“You’re good in bed, sue me.”

“And that’s why you dragged me in here tonight? Because I’m good in bed?”

“Yes,” she said, “I needed something to distract me from everything else going on, and you are one fantastic distraction.”

“I knew you only used me for my body,” he playfully fainted backwards into his pillows, before he rolled onto his side to look at her, his eyes turning serious for a moment, “You’ve been using me to distract you about your dad for a long time, Lee. There’s a reason you told me what was going on over a year ago before even my dad was allowed to tell me.”

“What do you want to hear, Jack?” she challenged, “That I trust you? That I care about you? Of course, I do, you know I do.”

“Then why has this,” he ran his fingers gently down her cheek, “Never been anything more?”

“You know why, Jack,” she sighed, sitting up, reaching for her dress to pull back on.

“Because you’re a princess and I’m the son of your father’s bodyguard?” he asked, “You remember that your mother used to be a commoner, right?”

“That was different,” she reminded him, “She won her right to be queen by playing along with the media games that eligible bachelors now do for my sister. Natalia should be glad that she isn’t a boy so that she doesn’t have to put up with it.”

He ran a hand through his hair, “Yeah, about that…”

She glanced around at him, “What?”

“Since the Nevrakis family don’t have a male heir to present, it is still their right to sponsor someone else to represent their house. Olivia asked me if I would do it.”

Her mouth fell open, “You have got to be fucking kidding me? You’re in the running to marry my sister?”

“It’s a formality,” he assured her, “You know I don’t want to marry her.”

She scoffed, “Spare me the bullshit. Who wouldn’t want to marry golden girl Lyra? Win the perfect girl’s hand and get the crown whilst you’re at it.”

“Lee, hey,” he said, sitting up to join her as she angrily began to yank her clothes on. He grabbed her hand and turned her to look at him, “I don’t want any part of this. I’ll jump through some hoops, ride some horses and sail a boat or two, snap some good pictures and represent the Nevrakis family for my sister’s sake if nothing else, and then in a few weeks everything will be back to the way it should be.”

She met his eyes and he watched her relax for a split second before she yanked her hand out of his grasp, “Just get your clothes on and find your own room for tonight. I want to be alone.”

“Lee…”

“I said I want to be alone,” she hissed under her breath, “Just go.”

He pulled his clothes on, glanced back at her one last time, then left the room.

Come the morning, all four Rys children awoke in their separate bedrooms, minds split between the harrowing news of their father and the revelations that had occurred the night before. Whatever came of it, they knew that today life had to go on, and with it; the social season. Which meant that they were headed to Lythikos for the Winter Ball.

[angelixii]

1-140 (anything you haven't answered already) - Felix

Oh, hello! Thanks for the ask!! 💕

3 fears - Spiders (I get frightened when I think about them) heights (slightly) and the public (anything like murder, kidnapped, ya know stupid people)

 3 Things I love - Music, Idols, and animals

 2 Turns on - ig Hats (like snapbacks) and glasses

 2 Turns off - oof I don’t really know.. ig self absorbed or a fudge boy

 My best friend - C: @straykids-sk (wuv you)

 How tall am I - 5′2

 What do I miss right now - My cat that passed away :c (her name was P.J)

 Favourite color - Blue, red, and sometimes green

 Do I have a crush - no not really

 Favourite place - my home

 What am I listening to right now - theres a website called asoftmurmur.com and it has noises like rain or waves and stuff like that

 Shoe size - pretty sure 10 in US womens

 Eye color - brown

 Hair color - light-ish brown

 Meaning behind my URL - I chose Felix cause hes my bias wrecker and hes angelic C:

 Favourite song - Theres like a million but 5SOS’s She Looks So Perfect wil always be a favorite (idk why)

 Favourite band - Ill just chose Stray Kids cause I don’t wanna write them all out

 How I feel right now - kinda tired but ig ok

 Someone I love - Ill say my best fren Georgia (@straykids-sk) cause i wuv her

 My current relationship status - single and i kinda wanna stay that way for a while

  My relationship with my parents - We all live in the same house and its just us (I have one other sister but she moved out. But shes here a lot tho) and we all get along well

 Favorite season - probably Spring c:

 Tattoos and piercing I have - none and I don’t really want any

 Tattoos and piercing I want - ^^^

The reasons I joined Tumblr - Georgia wanted me to and I thought it would be fun (I was right c:)

 Do I ever get “good morning” or “good night ” texts? - no :/

 Have I ever kissed the last person you texted? - oh heel no she my best fren I would never

 How long does it take me to get ready in the morning? - when I have school like 20 minutes at max

 Have you shaved your legs in the past three days? - I did today

 Where am I right now? - at my house on my laptop c:

 Do I like my music loud or at a reasonable level? - reasonable level cause I’ve always had ear problems and they are sensitive (even tho I always have my earbuds in)

 Do I live with my Mom and Dad? - yup

 Am I excited for anything? - not that I can think of no

 Do I have someone of the opposite sex I can tell everything to? - nope :/

 How often do I wear a fake smile? - not THAT often

 If I could meet anyone on this earth, who would it be? - oooof I don’t think I could answer that question

 What do I think about most? - probably k-pop

 Do I prefer to be behind the camera or in front of it? - Definitely behind

 What was the last lie I told? - It was kinda a joke but “i’ll do it because im the good child”

 Do I prefer talking on the phone or video chatting online? - Eh depends on who it is but facetiming/video chatting

 Do I believe in ghosts? How about aliens? - ghosts kinda and aliens, I mean sure we’ve barely discovered space, who knows whats out there

 Do I believe in magic? - sometimes yeah

 Do I believe in luck? - I mean yeah

 What’s the weather like right now?- theres nothing really going on

 What was the last book I’ve read? - uhhhhhh fully on my own (not in class)? The Maze Runner Scorch Trials

 Do I have any nicknames? - Kassadoodle, Kassidilla, Kassy

 Do I spend money or save it? - I’m trying to save as much as I can rn in my little money jar c:

 Can I touch my nose with a tounge? - nah

 Favourite animal? - Lions and Fennec Foxes

 What was I doing last night at 12 AM? - uhhh im pretty sure saying goodbye to Georgia on video chat

 What’s a song that always makes me happy when I hear it? - oo um I cant really think of one rn :/

 What is my favorite word? - yeet

 My top 5 blogs on tumblr (not in any order)

@honeylixs

@zoxsu

@tinyfigureskater

@stray-kids-dork

@straykidsmate

 If the whole world were listening to me right now, what would I say? - I probably wouldn’t say anything cause im shy and afraid people would judge me on what I say c:

 Do I have any relatives in jail? -not that I know of

What is my current desktop picture? - a pic of Bts

Had sex? Bought condoms? Gotten pregnant? Have I ever kissed somebody in the rain? Had job? Smoked weed? Smoked cigarettes? Drank alcohol?

no to ALL those questions C:

Am I a vegetarian/vegan? - nope don’t think I could ever

Been overweight? - …

Been underweight? - no.

Gotten my heart broken? - nah

Been to prom? - nope

Been in airplane? - nope and I never want to really

Learned another language? - I take required (cause im one of the more intelligent kids in school. I know shocker right?) Spanish classes in school but im on summer break so I dont remember any c:

Wore make up?- nope

Dyed my hair? - nope

Had a surgery? - plenty of ear surgery and had my tonsils removed

Met someone famous? - nope

Stalked someone on a social network? - nope

Been fishing? - no but my dad has always wanted to take me and it sounds kinda fun

Been rejected by a crush? - nope never really had one and if I did I would never have the guts

What do I want for birthday? - ooo idk but i have to wait till next year anyway cause its already passed

Do I like my handwriting? - sometimes when my hand cooperates

Where do I want to live when older? - with my girl Georgia

Have I ever got caught sneaking out or doing anything bad? - nope ima good child (yeah ok suuureee)

What I’m really bad at - running :/

What my greatest achievments are - managing to keep straight A’s and I dont even study cause im online so

The meanest thing somebody has ever said to me - “u bird cage” - Georgia c;

What I’d do if I won in a lottery - ooooooooof idk

What do I like about myself - uhhhhh heh ig my hair or eyes/eyelashes

My closest Tumblr friend - Georgia (yes I do know her irl but shes honestly the closet tumblr friend I have so)

Any question you’d like? - hmm idk

Are you outgoing or shy? - definitely shy, unless with people im close to then quite crazy

What kind of people are you attracted to? - funny, cute and nice people

Do you think you’ll be in a relationship two months from now? - hA no

Does talking about sex make you uncomfortable? - kinda

Who was the last person you had a deep conversation with? - oof idk

What does the most recent text that you sent say? “ohhhh no XDD” (sent to Georgia)

What are your 5 favorite songs right now? - (I already answered this question and don’t wanna answer again)

Do you like it when people play with your hair? - yes I love when freinds at school did (once we were watching a movie in Spanish and my friend next to me was playing with my hair and I almost fell asleep heh)

Do you think there is life on other planets? - totally

Do you like bubble baths? - I haven’t had one in forever

Do you like your neighbors? - only one cause I think im related to them somehow or they are to like my uncle

Where would you like to travel? - out of this hell hole country c:

Favorite part of your daily routine? - checking my tumblr and stanning talent

What part of your body are you most uncomfortable with? - stomach

What do you do when you wake up? - check my notifications on my phone

Do you wish your skin was lighter or darker? - I wish it was more tan than it is (im quite pale)

Do you ever want to get married? - yeah

If your hair long enough for a pony tail? - yes but I hate pony tails so I never do it (I used to all the time as a kid)

Would you rather live without TV or music? - I rarely watch t.v anymore and listen to music almost all day so

Have you ever liked someone and never told them? - I mean yeah

What are your favorite stores to shop in? - I dont really have one for clothes but I do like Walmart

Do you believe everyone deserves a second chance? - I mean sometimes

Do you smile at strangers? - If the smile at me first yeah

Have you done anything recently that you hope nobody finds out about? - not that I can remember no

Ever wished you were someone else? - no (as much as I hate myself no)

Favorite makeup brand? - son;t wear any so I dont got one

Last thing you ate? - a Reese cup

Ever won a competition? For what? - not a big one I can remeber no

Ever been in love? - c:

Facebook or Twitter? - dont have a fb and i barely use twitter anymore but twitter

Twitter or Tumblr? - DEFINITELy tumblr

Are you watching tv right now? - i mean its always on for bg noise and light so ig so

What color are your towels? - all kinds of colors

Favorite ice cream flavor? - either Strawberry with out the strawberries or cookie dough

First person you talked to today? - my mom

Last person you talked to today? - Georgia

Name a person you hate? - C: theres too many

Name a person you love? - once again, theres too many

Is there anyone you want to punch in the face right now? - C: theres too many

Do you tan a lot? - I barely go outside so thats a no

Have any pets? - too many

Do you type fast? - I mean kinda yeah

Do you regret anything from your past? - everything XD

Ever broken someone’s heart? - I highly doubt it

Have you ever liked someone so much it hurt? - C:

Is cheating ever okay? - hell no

Do you believe in true love? - I mean sure

What your zodiac sign? - Pisces

Do you believe in ghosts? - why is this question on here twice?

Get the closest book next to you, open it to page 42, what’s the first line on that page? (via catscuddlingandyou) - “…but not at all overwhelming, the balance of the different fragrances was subtle and flawless.” Twilight - Breaking Dawn (Do NOt ask me why thats the closest book its not mine and ive never read it and i NEVER plan on it)

oof that took like two hours heh.. its now currently 2:18am. and im very tired

but thanks for the ask anyway love! Im sorry for the wait! I was busy today. But im probably going to go to bed now

[flyswhumpcenter]

It’s Never Too Late to Call Quit

This sickfic is heavily inspired by @swiggity-swump’s amazing fic Late Work, based on an also really cool prompt by @taylor-tut ! I just felt like I had to credit them both because they’re Sickfic Goals TM. For once, the fic is on Tumblr, but I’ll probably still post it on AO3 later anyway.

Summary: It’s a peaceful Monday evening, and Richard has had a nice day until then. What could possibly wrong, when he has a training oral with the best student of the class on a text he personally loves? Well... It doesn’t depend on Richard.

Fandom: PDV (original work, zero need for additional material)

Word count: 2.3K words

Note: “Ulm” refers to the fanciest college one can enter. “Khâgne” and “hypokhâgne” refer to a special cursus to allow students to enter this prestigious school, which correspond to the two first years of college (but it’s literature).

Now available on AO3!

Richard is quite happy today. All his orals have been good so far, or at least decent, and he hasn’t given a single bad grade all week. This is a rare occasion, even among his fellow Ancient Literature specialists. This is the last oral he has on the list to give, and unfortunately for him, he has no oral to go through while his last student prepares his translation and commentary.

He already reads again the text he is about to give. A very short extract he loves from Aeschylus’s The Persians, a fragment of the Messenger’s address to the Queen of Persia after the defeat of Salamis. He isn’t sure about the historical accuracy of the text: he just knows he loves this play and is, deep inside, glad to give it the top student of this class.

 He has a filled grid in front of him, with all the students’ names. On this Monday evening of February, he is feeling pretty good. This is rare enough for him to smile about it. He muses over a name sloppily written in blue ink, facing the hour of the oral’s preparation and start: François Bannaire.

Despite his common name, common-sounding surname and his sloppy writing, he is by far the top student of his class. Good in everything but philosophy, brilliant in literature despite clearly disliking his teacher (who could blame him, she is quite the old hag), good enough at his secondary language to already be trilingual in English and Italian. Richard can’t lie to himself: he really likes this kid.

 “Kid” is the way he would describe François Bannaire, at least. He is fairly young, maybe too young for all he knows and is capable of doing. It’s as if he was condemned to study like a monk before joining Henri IV for his khâgne year. Nobody even knew about the school he had made his hypokhâgne year in, but his personal file was good no one even dared refusing one more student in a slightly overstuffed class. He was just this miraculous. The kind of student who had his free pass for Ulm. On this field, he has yet to disappoint anyone but the philosophy teacher, who is still a bit pissed at the boy for having just given back an introduction to an essay out of lack of inspiration for passions and war.

“Kid” is more about how François is. He is barely eighteen, discovering the joys and cons of adulthood one head at a time (he still hasn’t agreed to a single drop of alcohol, “my mom told me to be careful” has become a joke in the class, but he laughs at it too), isn’t too rushed about growing up as if he is in a daydream. He isn’t, but nobody dares telling the kind and naïve François life is harsh and will spit in his face more than once. That’s what happens when you’re one college year ahead of your age and attend an abstract cursus, Richard guesses.

 A knock on the door breaks the teacher from his thoughts and he walks to the door, already expecting his star student to rock his Bailly dictionary to success. He did so the first time around, so why would he not on the second? This is exciting, when he thinks about it. It’s always exciting when he’s certain this is going to be marvellous.

He opens the door and faces the boy, except his excitement falls flat on its face as soon as he does so. François looks… more than odd. When he would be a bit stressed, and showing so, but still make his greatest grin to his teachers, he was sporting a pained look, as if his stress had taken over. He can see his legs are shaking, and the way he holds his Greek-to-French dictionary is feeble at best.

 “H-hello s-sir… Sorry, I’m a tad late…” he rasps, breathless.

It must be anxiety. The boy has the pressure of everyone’s hopes, after all.

“Hello, François. Please take a seat in the room. I will get you the text” the teacher replies as he walks to the desk.

 The student installed himself in the back of the room, so he has to walk a little bit to reach him, but it doesn’t take long and soon enough, he’s all ready to translate the short extract. Richard goes back to his seat, at the desk, and plunges himself inside his novel. He’s corrected enough tests for the day, he can allow himself a small hour of reading, can’t he? He’s the boss of himself, duh.

The sound of a pencil scratching paper is nice, he thinks. It helps him focus, for a reason he can’t ever get out of his brain. However, the occasional muffled cough noise isn’t. It’s grating, and since he doesn’t come from him, it must come from the only other person in the room. It may just be some regular cough his mind makes up to be stronger, muffled by his student’s scarf. He shrugs it away. It’s February, of course the boy is going to be a bit sick, who isn’t?

 After a while, there is a complete silence. No pencil, no cough. He doesn’t think of it a lot at first: François must be reading his paper again to see if he made some translation error, or is thinking about what to say for the commentary on the text. Nothing big, nothing out of the ordinary. He lays back into his chair, still deep into his crime story (he’ll never admit to his workmates his love for crime novels, it’s not real literature).

“Time’s up,” Richard tells him while looking at his watch, “come to the desk now, please.”

There is no reply. No sound. Nothing.

 Feeling like he’s being kidded with, the Greek teacher gets up from his chair, clutching on his red pen in a hope to exhort his anger out of the words he is about to throw at the boy’s face. When he arrives in front of the table, he has to admit to himself something: that wretched student is fast asleep on his sheets, and the dictionary is still opened to the Ν pages. Honestly, Richard is more than a little pissed about this.

“Mr Bannaire, it is time to wake up. You have an oral to take. I do not want this to require me waking you up.”

He doesn’t even begin to stir. This is going to frustrate him to anger far quicker than he ever expected it to.

 At his feet, Richard notices a pencil whose point got broken and a tissue. That’s when he notices how unnaturally his student is slumped, left hand limply hanging out of the table while his right arm is still on the open dictionary. It’s as if he fell asleep so suddenly he didn’t have time to see it coming. This is quite an impressive fatigue, Richard thought, and a small sigh escaped his mouth. If he was this tired, maybe he should be a bit kinder today.

He puts a hand on his student’s shoulder, only to take it off a second later. Did he just put his hand on a heater instead? Doubting, he shakes him, still feeling this heat on his palms, until a cough is heard, and François finally stirs, slowly, almost numbly.

 His eyes eventually lock into his teachers’. His face is instantly washed with fear and panic, and his hands retrieve all his needed papers, including a full draft for a translation.

“I-I’m sorry sir… I didn’t mean to fall asleep…!” he grogs out before retaining a cough. “Sorry for that, let me… let me just get my stuff together for it…”

“François.”

 Upon hearing his name, the boy stops and looks at him. Richard slips his hand under the thick, chocolate brown bangs of the younger man, only to grit his teeth.

“You’re not taking that oral tonight, on my career’s sake. You’re going home right now.”

“B-but why…? It’s because I slept…?”

Richard can barely believe he just said that.

“Okay, François, listen. You’re burning up. You’re clearly ill beyond reason. You should be in bed right now, not translating some Greek. We’ll just postpone it, okay? This isn’t as big of a deal as you’re making it out to be.”

Red, puffed eyes look away as he attempts to wipe them by wiping his glasses.

“It’s just a tiny fever… I can do it, sir, please…”

“No is no, Mr Bannaire. You are officially discharged and going back home.”

Oh wait.

“No, that’s right, you live in the dorms… I’ll bring you to Edith then. She’ll be able to call your parents so you can go back home.”

 As if it was possible, François’s face loses even more colour, to the point he looks like a corpse with a huge tint of red all over his face and cheeks. He suddenly gets up from his chair and, from the other side of the table, throws himself at Richard.

“Please don’t send me home! I don’t wanna explain to my dad why I’m sick again! Just send me back to dorm, I’ll find a way to get better by tomorrow! Don’t… don’t send me home…”

“François. How long have you been sick?”

“It’s just today… I don’t know why I feel so ba… I mean why I have a fever all of a sudden. It’s just a fever.”

“I can’t let you remain on school grounds in such a condition. We’re going to the nurse’s office immediately.”

 Then, Richard realizes what’s wrong with his student.

“Did you sleep a lot lately?”

“S-sir, if it doesn’t bother you, can we do that translation now…? I still have Latin and history stuff to do…”

The man had to retain the boy from falling over.

“You’re about to pass out, François. This isn’t the time to insist on taking an oral. Your hubris isn’t going to help at the moment.”

A small smile creeps on the student’s face.

“I get it… It’s like Xerxes’s failure at Salamis…”

He sits down as Richard decides to tide his stuff up, grabbing the backpack sloppily bleeding sheets on the table.

“S-sir… Can you walk me there…? I don’t think I’m seeing very clearly anymore…”

“Of course, if it means you can get the bed you deserve.”

 A few minutes later, Richard has two backpacks on his back and a boy on his shoulder, whose ragged breathing tells better than anything else how unwell he is. This wasn’t stress, after all, but maybe he should had seen that coming.

“I think you overworked yourself, François. It’s not natural to have such a fever from a day to the other. Did you sleep lately?”

“Huh… I slept two hours last night, I think so at least…? I can’t tell, my roommates were sleeping when I went to bed and when I woke up…”

“You have some deep dark rings under you-”

“Fuck I forgot to take my medicine… That’s why my chest feels so squeezy today…”

“What medicine?”

“Asthma treatment… Mine’s pretty bad apparently… That’s what Mom kept telling me…”

 Once at the nurse’s office, Richard finally remembers something. Edith’s shift ended an hour ago, and the night time nurse doesn’t come until another hour. However, he has a key of the room, kindly given to him by Edith in case anything happened to any of his students… But the single fact she wrote “François” on the keychain tells him she had a precise goal in mind.

Once the door is unlocked, he hurries to put his student on the closest bed he can find. He gets his phone out, calls for a doctor, who tells him to call for an ambulance if the fever is higher than forty and a half, so he shoves a thermometer down the boy’s mouth, and it reads “only” forty, so they just decide to wait for the other nurse.

 “Sir, I… I can sta-”

“I’ve heard you were easily ill, is that true?” Richard asks, interrupting his sentence on purpose.

“I do… But usually it’s just colds, or at worst anginas… I’m not used to harsh fevers yet…”

“Yet?”

“I haven’t had strong fevers before a few years. I guess that’s linked to overwork, that’s what everyone keeps telling me… I hate those, I feel really bad when they happen…”

“Why not sleep more to avoid it? You look exhausted.”

“Don’t have time… I have to get to Ulm… Or else I’ll have even more depths towards my father… And I don’t want that…”

“You do now letting yourself get this sick is more counterproductive than anything, right? You’re making things even harder for yourself.”

“Y-yeah, I wish I would stop doing that, but I always feel like I’m running out of time…”

 Richard sighs. He feels bad for that boy, dammit.

“That may be because we put a lot of pressure on you and your peers, but you may feel it more easily than the others… Did you feel that way last year?”

“Not really… They weren’t as competitive as here… The pressure was on whether or not I’d get my ancient lit speciality here… Is it me or is it cold in here…”

He’s shaking like a leaf in the middle of a blizzard.

“It’s your fever. I sadly have to leave you so I can get home before half past eight, but I don’t want to see you before you’re all better, ok? I’m sure you can get the lessons from your friends. Take care, François.”

“Thanks sir… Sorry for that…”

“It’s all fine. See you when you’re better.”

“G’bye…”

 Richard exits the room, closes the door and wipes up a sheet from his bag, writing down a small note for the incoming nurse. Once it’s done, he gets some transparent tape from his pencil case, tapes the paper to the door and makes his way to the exit of the school. It’s been a while since he genuinely hoped someone would get better soon.

[lawlight-week]

Lawlight Week Exchange

Title: Cavalier Youth

Name of Creator: @ruindunburnit

Created For: @abillionsecrets-literally

Prompt: L and Light try to make each other jealous by dating other people.

Characters: Light Yagami, L Lawliet

Rating: Teen and up

Warning: references to (in-story) stalking and psychological torture prior, incomplete fic - to be completed/hosted at @ruindunburnit

No. of Words: 5,851

Part 1:

The case had hit a dead end.

The Kira known as Kyosuke Higuchi had been dead for over two days. His notebook had been in their possession for exactly that long. With nothing else to do, the task force was still filling out paperwork at midday when Soichiro Yagami clasped his son’s shoulder. “I know we’re not quite done here,” he said, “but have you thought about going back to To-Oh University?”

L had been working through the glass dessert bowl of gummi bears set in front of him. Footage from Higuchi’s momentary arrest played on mute on his computer. Reviewing the tapes was his newest obsession, but he turned at the sound of the chief’s voice. Light rubbed his left wrist reflexively. “What do you mean, ‘not quite done’?” he asked, gesturing to the paperwork over on the coffee table. “We’re far from done. Kira’s still out there. All we have is his notebook and his mess to clean up.”

“The notebook is almost irrelevant unless it lives up to its reputation,” L drawled.

Matsuda and Aizawa looked up from the sofas. “Come on, Ryuuzaki,” Matsuda groaned, “not this again!”

“I agree,” Aizawa said. “There’s no point to debating this crap again. If we don’t test it, we never find out if it’s the murder weapon, we’re not doing our jobs as investigators and the notebook is just a notebook. If we test it as Ryuuzaki suggests and a criminal dies, we’re no better than Kira, and if no one dies, then Kira gets the best of us. We stand to lose either way, so unless someone finds a loophole to work out if Schrodinger’s Notebook is the murder weapon, let’s drop it and get back to work.”

Both L and the chief glared at him, and yet Aizawa stood his ground. Surviving the arrest and re-joining the task force had made him brazen. Seeing a shinigami may have made him at least a little bit mad. It did, however, save them about ten minutes of an argument they’d already had.

“As I was saying,” Soichiro said to Light, “as long as you have your freedom and we don’t have a solution concerning the notebook, there’s nothing wrong with you re-enrolling and helping out at headquarters part time. Watari and Ryuuzaki both agree there’s no risk to the investigation if you do.”

“Well, as long as Ryuuzaki thinks so,” Light said. Of course, the detective wouldn’t allow a risk no matter where he was, but it didn’t stop the bristle of irritation he felt that his father brought it up. Ever since he’d regained his memories during the arrest, it had taken a little time for his mind to recover and reintegrate. As much as he knew he was Kira now, even gloated inwardly at the brilliance of his gambit, months of constant prodding and taunting had given him a bit of a complex for proving his innocence. He still saw doubts in all their eyes and he couldn’t blame them; he was only under suspicion to begin with because L knew Kira was utilizing a leak to the NPA’s investigation. As much as he knew his father would expect him to be defensive since he’d seen the constant accusations first hand, he didn’t like how it made him feel – like a child rebuked.

“No one will doubt your innocence if you take up your studies again,” L chimed in. “You’ll need a degree if you intend to be a detective for the NPA.”

At least I only missed one semester,” Light said. He could only guess at what they’d said to excuse his absence.

“You could stay at headquarters,” his father pressed, “if it helps you balance your school work and the case.”

Light nodded and looked over to L. He was back to watching the arrest footage, the screen displaying the cockpit of the helicopter. Only Light’s face remained unblurred in the film. “Sure,” Light said, “but only if Ryuuzaki can spare an afternoon for another tennis match. Right?”

“Mm.” The detective wasn’t paying attention, apparently.

“Another tennis match?”

“Yeah, Dad. It was just a friendly game on campus in April and—” he paused, remembering what had also happened that day.

“Yagami-san was very stressed,” L said. “I did mention it to him, but then, he was on strict bedrest before the–”

“You said yourself,” Light said. The last thing he needed was to be reminded of his responsibility for his father’s health. “College can be fun when no one’s trying to kill you. What would you say?”

“Work comes first,” he said, “but I’ll see what I can do. We can’t all afford to take reduced hours on full time pay.”

“Funny, I wasn’t aware you were paying me anything.”

“That’s not true. We set aside a sum under your life insurance. Of course, that money is for your family, but it covers every eventuality.”

For a moment, Light blanched. “You’re lying.”

“I wouldn’t lie about something like that,” L said around another mouthful of gummi bears. “If you want, Watari can show you – it’s under the folder marked ‘Compensation’.”

“Or,” Soichiro said, shuffling the documents in his hands, “if you want, you could move in with Miss Amane. You’re eighteen years old, and your mother and sister believe we had a disagreement about your relationship with her, so it wouldn’t be unexpected. I… spared the details.”

Light looked to L, to the expression on his face. It was entirely too interested. “I couldn’t do that,” Light said. “I know I’ve said it before, but I was only pretending to go along with Misa’s delusion for the sake of Ryuuzaki’s investigation. Her feelings towards me are completely one-sided, but he suggested I get close to her anyway. Now that the suspicions have been dropped, there’s no point to continuing that charade. It would be cruel.”

“Ouch, Light,” Matsuda said. “I’m glad she’s not around to hear that.”

“Matsuda’s right,” L said, with a tone of ‘for once’, “that’s a little cold.” The others were too busy looking at Light to notice the smirk on the detective’s face.

“Those were your orders,” Light said. From the corner of his eye, he spotted the shinigami Rem floating in through an inner wall. Although everyone in the room could see her, acknowledging it didn’t exactly make them feel at ease with the situation. “Continuing any sort of relationship with her would be wrong because, to be honest, she’s a stalker.”

Within moments, the mood of the room had shifted. “What?” Matsuda stood up from the sofa. “Misa-Misa wouldn’t do that.”

Aizawa rolled his eyes. “So a pretty girl throws herself at you. That doesn’t make her a stalker.”

L considered it. “That’s why she claimed to fall in love with you the day she saw you in Aoyama. Stalkers develop intense feelings for their victims extremely fast. If that’s the case, why didn’t you call the police?”

Light exhaled. “When we first met, it was because she followed me home. I thought she was just a lost Goth Lolita until she threatened my life on the porch step, so I invited her in and told my mother and sister that she was my girlfriend. I didn’t want them to worry or feel unsafe, and Misa seemed appeased when I played along.” He paused, taking in the concern on his father’s face, wondering just for a moment if he was actually concerned or doubtful. “I thought if I kept up the act until she left again, I could phone the police later and, if necessary, keep calling whenever she came back. I didn’t know until she was in my room that she knew who my father was, or that she had anything to do with those occult tapes, and by then she was insisting on making me her boyfriend, demanding constant contact, threatening to kill any girl she saw me with…” he shuddered, appropriately. “Naturally, I feared she might be the type to turn on my sister, so I complied and got her to go home again. I thought I could wait until the morning to file for a restraining order…”

L picked a few gummi bears out of the bowl. “Which was when you found out she was an up-and-coming idol, correct?”

“Right. And whether she was physically capable of committing murder, I realised she didn’t have to. Idols like her aren’t allowed to publically have boyfriends, and if I upset her, all she would have to do is hold a conference, tell a few lies about a boyfriend and drop his distinctive name to the press. It wouldn’t matter to a girl like her if it ruined her career, because if I survived the media storm, the NPA would find it in a background check. I’d be lucky if I got away with moving to Sapporo, changing my name and joining a tech company.”

“That’s specific,” Aizawa muttered.

“So,” Light said. “I asked my mother and sister to keep her a secret from Dad, even though her involvement in the tapes could have been a lead to the real Kira. She knew I was interested in the Kira case, and if it was a lie, the last thing I wanted to do was mislead you. I would have broken it up with her, probably received a few odd parcels in the mail and requested a restraining order, but she had to find me at school and mislead the whole case as a result.” He focused his gaze just above L’s right ear, where he watched as Rem fixed him with her yellow eye, listening almost unseen.

“Light,” his father said. “Why didn’t you say anything about this before? We could have taken measures, moved house.”

“And disrupt everything for Mom and Sayu? Besides, it would have only sounded like a convenient excuse to Ryuuzaki. He doesn’t need to investigate his way out of a paper bag – he’d assign blame until it ripped itself.”

“But Light, I thought I taught you what to do in situations like these. I thought I told you to tell me if a stranger followed you home.”

Light sighed, meeting his father’s eyes. “You were already falling ill over the case. You were already stressed because of all of L’s suspects, I alone fit both Kira’s profile and his movements. If I was Ryuuzaki, and I knew my prime suspect had been spontaneously contacted by a dangerous individual who fit the Second Kira’s profile, I wouldn’t have waited on a cover story or for my prime suspect to confess; I would have brought them in for questioning immediately.”

When he looked back at the detective, he was stuffing a dainty handful of gummi bears in his mouth. He stared at him chewing. “I agree,” L finally said. “Light-kun’s involvement with Miss Amane was the piece that was always the most suspicious. If Light-kun were Kira,” if L noticed the way Soichiro stiffened, he ignored it completely, “and he decided to find an assistant, he would have also known he was being followed from class to class. He would also know that, thanks to the sheer number of young women he was seen with, his signature ‘type’ had been noted and the least suspicious option would be to choose a woman who fit the type. Maybe what they say is true about the rules of attraction being unfathomable, and maybe it’s not unusual for an attractive man like Light-kun to simply date an attractive woman like Miss Amane, but…”

“But what, Ryuuzaki?” Light asked. He picked a couple of gummi bears from the bowl; not to eat, just to let them sit in his closed hand.

“But, Light-kun,” he pushed the bowl slightly closer to himself, “there wasn’t any chemistry, was there?”

“Absolutely none.”

“If Light-kun were Kira, he would never allow himself to be saddled with such a dangerous woman, not unless the pros of keeping her around outweighed the cons and, if you don’t mind me asking, you weren’t interested in intercourse with her, were you?”

“Not even given the circumstances,” Light said. “She would be much happier with someone else.”

“As I thought,” L said. “I’m glad you could be honest with me.”

Light set the gummi bears back on the desk and wiped his hand on a tissue from a box by his computer. L’s sweet tooth had its risks, which tended to triple when handcuffs were involved. “Thank you,” he said, “but tell me – if I was still under suspicion of being Kira, would confessing this have confirmed your suspicions, or contradicted them?”

The glass bowl was still half full, but L smiled and picked up the discarded candy. Light hid his revulsion under his current expression – concerned conviction – as L proceeded to eat them. Light’s face felt warmer at the sight, waiting. “I might have reconsidered allowing her association with you to continue,” the detective said. “But it would have been a pity to lose such a lifeline.”

So it didn’t matter after all.

“If that’s how you feel,” his father said, “then you shouldn’t continue to let her think she’s dating you. You should break up with her soon, as quickly – and gently – as possible.”

“I don’t think that’s an option,” L said. “Anything too subtle and she could convince herself it never happened.” He swivelled the chair round to find Watari wheeling in a large white cake with a pile of marzipan strawberries arranged on top. He just caught the panicked expression beginning to cloud the shinigami’s eye, willing her not to act. “If I were Light-kun, I would rip the plaster off immediately.”

“That’ll work!” Aizawa scoffed, “‘I’m breaking up with you, Misa. I just need some space from you – a hundred square feet of it, to be exact, and if I never see your face again, it couldn’t be too soon.’” He huffed again. “The Chief would fit what’s left of him in a matchbox.”

Matsuda sighed. He’d looked so uncomfortable hearing all this talk about Misa, but he knew where his loyalties lay. “Sorry, Light. At least you’ll save money.  Or, you won’t, you’ll be dead, but that won’t be so bad.”

“Don’t be an idiot,” Aizawa said. “This isn’t what he had in mind when he said he was willing to give his life for the case. It isn’t noble – it’s pathetic.”

“Both of you,” his father admonished, “think about what you’re saying.”

“I’m just saying,” Matsuda said, “there’s no Misa-Misa in the afterlife, right?”

Light sighed. He already knew what was in ‘the afterlife’, and by the look on Rem’s face, he was going to have it confirmed sooner than he had in mind.

Part 2:

Light had been too distracted by the gaps in his memories, by the question of why L would suspect him so strongly without evidence nor knowledge of committing murder, to notice it before. It had taken until that morning of the 31st, watching from the corner of his eye as the crouching detective replayed the footage from the helicopter cockpit, as he requested for the seventh time in two days permission to prove that the killer notebook did exactly as its rule-page suggested, for Light to realise that the way he felt towards him was a little more strong than ‘admiration’.

He told himself it only took so long because his mind was healing, in its own way. It would often throw out thoughts that would make sense once and then never again, and that was just the process. Having traumatic memories ripped from your brain and replaced months later alongside new traumas could do that to you. Which was why his brain had decided to reframe their months handcuffed to one another in such an absurd light.

Well, we were sleeping in the same bed – still sleeping in the same bed actually. We showered together sometimes, ate together always, fought each other. Accidents happened. It’s not like a conclusion like that was completely impossible.

He tried blaming his hormones at first. He was eighteen – still an adolescent. Superior intellect didn’t make things less intense, didn’t make the thoughts flitting through his head at the sight of the detective less confusing, but then it didn’t ebb once he sat down with a clear head to think it through. Even when he told himself that it was just the psychological effect of L’s brand of investigation that made him think of the detective as ‘desirable’ and himself as dependent on it (just that and his curiosity hanging onto the memory of stolen looks in the shower, accidental touches in bed, wondering with a quickened breath how it would feel to have him so close and have him wanting to be so close in turn) it didn’t change the fact that the detective was the closest thing to compatible he’d ever known in a human being.

In other words, he tried telling himself, it was just the relief of finding someone who could properly challenge him. It was an almost classical dilemma. He imagined numerous superheroes and villains had felt that for each other at one point or another. “It’s for more than the fight between good and evil that Professor X and Magneto stay in touch!” He’d laughed it off when Yamamoto exclaimed it back in high school – if Magneto got all hot and bothered for Professor X, he’d have the sense to take it in hand at the end of the day and not let it get in the way of his work – but that was before he experienced it first-hand.

It wouldn’t matter in the end, he knew, not for much longer. It would fade once the challenge was over and Kira won. His perfect victory was so close he could almost taste the soil they’d be throwing on L’s coffin.

That thought had made him shiver visibly. His father had asked him what was wrong, to which he had simply said that he was a little cold. He continued to work, as though he’d forgotten for the moment that if he wanted to go up to the bedroom and find a sweater, there was nothing to stop him. As though he didn’t actually have a hard time remembering that he was no longer limited by a six foot long chain with a human pivot on one end. This was not the moment to let him out of his sight.

It was worse than he thought. It was one thing to find someone – and a deadly opposition to all his plans at that – who was both compatible on a personal level and attractive in a way he’d never felt for anyone else. It was one thing to want someone so badly he’d found himself about to Gentle search ‘Stockholm syndrome’ before he remembered who would be looking through the browser histories, and on more than five occasions. It was quite another to react so strongly to the thought of that same deadly rival no longer being alive.

He thought he knew the risks going in. He was willing to sacrifice his soul, his sanity, even his family if there was no other option, and although he proceeded with his mission holding onto to all of those pieces so close-fisted, he accepted that accomplishing noble goals came with accepting a certain degree of self-sacrifice. He was ready to give up everything if it meant a better world for everyone else.

So it wasn’t exactly welcome news when he realised where exactly he was willing to draw the line. His conscience? His family? Yes, if it came down to the wire. Any hypothetical threat to his ability to act as Kira is a threat to the good of the world and the many come before the few. The obsessed investigator/warden who just wouldn’t get off his back no matter how little evidence he had? The actual, quantifiable threat to his ability to act as Kira? And give up the chance to fuck the world’s three greatest detectives all at once? No, that would be too much! He would lose his mind first.

He probably had. To think, after all he’d done, after everything he’d sacrificed already, he was still exactly as cowardly as he used to fear he was. That had to be why his priorities were so irrevocably screwed.

Light watched as L’s screen displayed the Kira known as Kyosuke Higuchi’s last moments. He saw the man seize up in the officers’ arms and drop, again, again, again. Light knew, ever since he held the notebook in his hands, his memories fully restored, ever since he caused the Straw Man Kira to drop that he could have turned his back on his duties as the First Kira. If he’d allowed L to take the notebook from him, allowed himself to lose his memories again without writing a single name, he could have stepped out of his responsibility as God in a flash. If he’d just done that and let L’s investigation peter out, he could have eventually returned to his normal life. He could have simply joined the NPA with an impressive ‘worked on the task force against Kira’ note on his resume and the Great Detective L’s representative acting as his reference, risen through the ranks. Knowing his own fate – and he’d learned a thing or two about fate in the last year – he would be back to working with L on another great case. (Maybe as the very head honcho of the NPA, he thought).

And there would be another great case, he countered; whenever Kira paused in his judgements, the crime rate only hesitated a moment before rising right back up again. He initially thought his judgements would only make potential criminals think twice before committing crimes, but in reality it didn’t make them think hard enough and it definitely didn’t eliminate crimes of passion. The crime rate would always lower by 70% while Kira was active, but that margin didn’t completely cover the spontaneous. The criminals that continued in Kira’s world were altogether worse than the ones he’d already judged; their lives meant nothing to them and they simply had nothing left to lose. He used to think it was the failings of the criminal justice system that rendered the threat of state-administered execution useless.

In reality, that was only a portion of the truth; capital punishment was never an effective threat to begin with. Now that Higuchi was gone and Misa still lacked her powers and memories, Light was currently the only Kira left – or would be, once he could get himself access to a notebook. Even if he could, the only thing that kept him in this holy justice business was knowing that, without Kira, the crime rate would be higher. Not ‘present’ – ‘higher’. If he stopped, everything he’d done as Kira would be pointless. If he stopped, every person he’d disposed of for the crime of posing a threat to his spotless record would have been killed for nothing. Since the actions of every dead or dormant Kira stemmed from him, that put the deaths of innocent police officers and detectives, scandalous celebrities, numerous businessmen at Light’s feet alone.

If he stopped what he was doing now, his dream of a crime-free tomorrow would not only have been inefficiently executed, it would remain incomplete and completely useless. Since he didn’t stop to take the easy way out while he could still lose his memories, he would know it for the rest of his life. It wasn’t a fate he was looking forward to.

–

He picked up the thread of this thought later. When he retired to the break room to eat a timely dinner alone at a table laden at one end with slices of Victoria sponge cake slices on bone-white china plates, the question rested on what he was going to do about it all.

It wasn’t all bad news. For the first time in almost a full year, he wasn’t under any formal investigation. He was still at the task force headquarters, this time under his volition, where he could keep an eye on the threats of L’s investigation. Now that the task force had possession of Kira’s ‘killing power’, the investigation had just hit a significant standstill caused by their own lack of conviction to ‘do what it takes’ to capture Kira. Taking into account that they’d lost the one person they had in connection to the original Kira, and this original Kira was apparently taking a break to let the heat die down, the standstill would remain as long as they remained paralysed by the thought of testing the notebook.

Just as Light expected, this was already driving L to boredom, and the detective had exactly two ways of dealing with boredom. If he couldn’t sate it quickly enough, he hit the ground and stayed there. If he didn’t hit the ground, he found his own fun and refused to let go. It was the detective’s worst quality, the one that could halt dangerous investigations or drive them in their own circles.

In other words, re-establishing regular judgements wasn’t at the top of Light’s to-do list. Now that it was no longer part of the plan to dispose of L either, Misa no longer had a use to him. Without her eyes, without even a notebook, she was just a walking reminder of how close L had come to winning, how close he had come to executing the both of them. She was a complete liability, and the sooner he got it squared away, the better.

It wasn’t all bad news, but the situation was a precarious one; L’s restlessness would only last so long, so if there was a time to give him something to latch onto before he found it for himself, this was it.

Light let out a deep breath he hadn’t realised he was holding, and looked up to see Matsuda resetting up the coffee machine. He was filling the top with the bitter French coffee that Light knew the detective would only have immediately after waking up and never in the middle of a work day and smiled to himself. He would have thought a man whose only quantifiable job was fetching coffee would remember a little detail like that, but neither did he get up to show him the milder, inexplicably fruitier blend that could have saved his job. As much as his claims of innocence as well as the investigation were preserved by keeping L happy, as much as he actually wanted to keep the detective happy, he’d done nothing but cause the tension to rise all day.

That settled it. L’s very presence in his life was integral to Kira’s success. Whatever he did from now on, it would be in the interest of pursuing his feelings for him. As much as L would destroy Kira at the first opportunity he had, Light knew that he’d only come as far as he had because he’d had a rival in the Great Detective L. It was a fated part of his rise to Godhood – yes, fated, not conditioned, not at all humiliating – that, if it hadn’t been for those intrusive investigative methods, he wouldn’t have grown into his role as Kira quite so well. So, it wasn’t just about his stupid desires: getting rid of the detective now while he had the upper hand would only ruin him. If he wasn’t under his watch, working closely with him just as much as he was working against him, he’d grow complacent and his progress now would mean nothing. He could already see the writing on the wall: the role of Kira uninterrupted, society eventually moulding to his vision, with no one to try to stop him but a task force he could already lead by the nose… he’d make mistakes, ridiculous ones, and for those he would pay with his life.

That didn’t mean he was necessarily going to wait until they were both in the bedroom they still shared and jump him – as things stood, that would be a suicidal move. That wasn’t to say he thought L would be against his attentions if he did; the detective just needed to learn new ways of dealing with his obsession with Light first, outside of calling him Kira and slapping handcuffs on him. The way he showed affection needed a little work.

No, more finesse was required. Unless he was careful now, L could still find him out and destroy him, and that could not be allowed to happen. If he was to remain free and have L too, it was a matter of neutralising him completely. He had to make him care for Light more than he hated Kira.

It would have to be a lot. He still wondered how he managed to rationalise the same dilemma, even wishing in the back of his mind that the man he wanted was simply ‘this man Ryuuzaki’ rather than the world’s three greatest detectives who wanted him dead most of all. He even considered that it would have made these choices easier to make if he was just his father’s boss; he knew he couldn’t help that this was how he was fated to meet the only person he could ever truly stand for more than an hour, but it was still, well, scandalous. (In which case, it was a good thing this was L rather than someone with a face to show the public – at least it couldn’t reach the media).

If Light was still having these thoughts, how was L going to rationalise being with a former suspect on a major investigation? Light didn’t think he had any illusions of integrity to abandon first, but with Watari looking out for him and the task force (including his own father, of course) who would have something to say no matter how many times Light had them wrapped around his little finger, L would have to believe that Light was worth more than losing a little face with his employees.

Matsuda picked up a slice of the cake and one of the forks left on a little tray on the counter, taking the confection back to the coffee table in the main room while he waited for the coffee machine to brew. He only paused to smile at light quickly, apologetically, as if his sweet tooth was something he ought to apologise for as a man of the law. . Light refrained from rolling his eyes, for the sake of being polite; the older man’s hang ups about performing his own masculinity were not his problem.

As to his own problem, it wasn’t quite as big as he was making it out to be. He would be making his calls to To-Oh starting tomorrow morning, beginning the process of getting re-enrolled. From as soon as next week, his time at headquarters would suddenly become limited. Just as Light knew he was used to finally working alongside someone on his own level, he knew L would begin to rue his absences when he only had the task force for company in an idling investigation. Since the suspicion on him was only dropped so recently, since his innocence depended on a circumstance not a one of them had the balls to disprove, Light was about ninety percent certain he’d put a tail on him just to have something to occupy himself with. ‘It’s just to make sure Light-kun isn’t using his new freedom to set up some Kira business – it’s best to be safe than sorry’, as the detective would tell himself.

And that is when Light will use the detective’s one truly fatal flaw: L’s desire for anything positively quadrupled when he thought he might not be able to have it. It was why he took on the most challenging cases. It was why the idea that Light couldn’t be Kira only made him hold on all the harder to the conclusion. And it was why, once Light got back to university, he’d use the oldest play in the book.

Dating other people, right where L’s tail could see him do it, acting intimately, even romantically, with anyone but L himself… it would be just the right incentive to have the detective act on his feelings. And since Kira wasn’t doing anything, the question of his feelings toward his former suspect, his want for him, would consume him above even the investigation. He’d truly regret letting Light scale back his hours. He’d have no choice but to come back to university and watch him personally. Whatever plan he might have to use the notebook against the task force’s wishes would simply have to wait until Light could stop even that.

That left Misa, the Littlest Liability herself. He’d already set up the reasons with the task force why he might want to drop her in the near future – hell, he even had their permission to dump her as soon as he could. It would help, but it wouldn’t be enough. From the moment she’d found him, she’d latched on to a near abusive, definitely dangerous degree; if she wasn’t putting his life at risk with her reckless behaviour, he was risking his life just to clean up her messes. That her very proximity to him was suspicious, it was a waste of his time and effort to say the least. When he thought he could exploit her superior power to kill L, she was just worth keeping around, but now that he’d made his decision to keep him alive…

Obviously, he couldn’t kill her. Rem would never allow it. The shinigami might consider L’s existence in perpetuity to be a threat to Misa’s life, but that didn’t mean he couldn’t extricate himself from her clutches completely either. It would just require something a tad more effective than a harsh break-up: Light wasn’t fool enough to brush off her death threats, and while she knew where he went to university, where he worked, where his family lived, she was a threat to his current plans. If she found out about his plans to seduce L, the detective would definitely wind up dead.

He meant it when he told the task force that Misa would be better off with someone who could return her feelings. But as long as Rem refused to see it that way, he could complain as much as he wanted: he was going to be stuck with her regardless. Which, obviously, was a problem.

Light sighed and lifted his head to see Matsuda heading out with L’s coffee. Setting his empty plate in the sink, he followed behind the rookie with the full pot of sugar cubes he’d forgotten. He knew it was petty, but after months of being accused of murders most foul, after two days of the black cloud of rebuilding his plans and working around L’s restlessness, watching the great detective accuse the rookie of trying to poison him seemed righteous somehow.

[ecotone99]

[SP] Pathetic

I've been staring at the TV for the past hour.

Not unusual... In usual times.

The TV's off. It's been off for the past five days, yet I still seem quite content to lounge and stare absent-mindedly at my distorted reflection on the black screen.

I'm glad I can't make anything distinct out... I reckon I'd look as bad as I feel. Ever since the announcement came things have changed.

It was a Sunday night and I was adhering to my tradition of drinking a box of wine and lamenting on how my life at the age of twenty-seven had devolved into a slow, meandering existence. You know, millennial bullshit.

As I was glugging down my fourth, but certainly not my last glass of vino, I was distracted when the TV almost fucking killed me. The speakers must have been blown out by the racket that thundered in. I must have looked a picture; those last drops of wine from the glass caught in my throat and I flapped around like a whale at sea-world desperate to be put out of its misery.

When I regained my composure and assured myself I'd never gain any respect, I stared at the TV which had finally shut up. Now a black screen was dominated by big bold letters -

STAY CALM - A MESSAGE FOR THE NATION INCOMING

What. The. Fuck.

Phone. Contacts. Mum.

Of course she didn't answer. I can picture it now; she's sat in bed, some true-crime documentary playing on the TV, and he'll be lying next to her. When her phone wakes up and my picture appears he'll stare at my mum and give her the it's late honey, we don't have the time to deal with her right now look. She'll return with the Thank god you said it, now I can at least pretend I was coerced into ignoring my only daughter, you're just the best Jimmy, I'm so glad I got married to you and threw that little shit out of our home so we can fuck with the doors open look.

That's it. That's my only point of contact. I felt pathetic at that point. As in, I truly understood what the feeling of pathetic was; there's a physical drop in your stomach and shivers run down your back...you become hot and an overwhelming sense of vulnerability hits you in the core. You could say that wasn't the best feeling to be overcome with as the TV emitted another assault to my eardrums.

The sound dissapated again and this time a voice replaced it almost immediately. It was the voice I had been expecting as soon as I saw the first message. Our great and glorious President.

My fellow Americans. It is with a heavy heart I speak to you tonight. Firstly I am very sorry for interrupting your Sunday evening, I'm sure many of you are quite afraid and concerned right now. I'd love to be able to tell you that there's no reason to worry, but I'm afraid I simply can't...

Phone. Recently Called. Mum

The United States today received information regarding an unprecedented and immovable obstacle to the continuation of not only our own existence, but that of every living thing on our planet...

Call was rejected again. I bet he slapped it out of her hand that time. No way would she ignore me, she must have been watching this as well?

There is an asteroid roughly twelve miles in diamater on a collision course with Earth. Projections are that it will strike us in seven days and the impact will result in the total annihilation of us and our home...

You go through the motions of acceptance incredibly quickly. It's not a drawn out process. I'll explain how mine happened -

Bullshit. He's the president of the United States of America addressing the entire nation. Okay, this is serious.

I know this is quite a shock. I presume many of you are wondering why I am being so open and frank about this. Well... I guess there's no more contingency plans or exit strategies to care about any more. It was important enough that I have decided, against the wishes of my advisors, to tell you the truth and allow you to go out in whichever way you feel is right and justified. I leave you with only one request - depart this world showcasing the best of humanity. Put our compassion, dignity and honour on a pedestal and let us move onto the next great adventure proud. Good luck to you all. Goodnight America

Then it was over. The screen flipped back to my original programming. I can't work out if Kim Kardashian was a vacuous waste of air and cells before or after I realised my world was over and nothing I ever did or dreamed about mattered anymore. Probably before, but I'll give her the benefit of the doubt.

The sound of my phone ringing came at me like it was trapped down a well, far off in the distance. I picked it up and my heart did one of this slight jumps when you get excited.

Mum. I'm scared

It's not your mother, it's Jimmy.

oh...

Look I'm calling to tell you me and your mother have decided to take off. I can't explain and to be honest, I won't. I'm sure you've just heard the president.

Erm okay. Well... Where should I meet you?

Meet us? What are you talking about!

Meet you so we can all be together obviously!

I think you've misunderstood this whole situation. I'm not surprised, you never where very bright... Look. You're not coming with. I called to make sure you didn't come running down here and waste your time. Just stay away from us.

Go fuck yourself Jimmy, put my mum on now!

Your mother doesn't want to speak to you. This has been coming a long time if I'm honest. How could you not see it? The heartache and trauma you have caused that poor woman. You should have the deceny to respect her last wishes and stay away. Don't you dare cause your mother any more heartbreak

I'll hear that from her you teet suckling leach

Then it happened. From somewhere in the background I heard her voice.

Just go away Kate! Jimmy has spoken for the both of us

I like to think she was sat at the dresser table at the side of the bed. Cigarette in hand and her mascara running down her face. Shaking so bad she couldn't get a proper drag and staring vehemently at Jimmy, who had forced her to lose all sense of humanity and compassion.

But it's more likely that OJ is innocent and Twilight is actually a good film if you look at it's artistic merits.

No, she would have been sat at that dresser, ensuring the phone was on loudspeaker and mouthing instructions to Jimmy, getting more perplexed and angry every time I spoke.

But... Mum, please I'm scared

This is where she would have inhaled deep and arched back ready to deliver her knockout punch. Jimmy would have slunk away from the phone, knowing his work was done and he can stand in the shadows and watch the emancipation in peace.

You listen here and you listen good. The last we spoke I told you I'd reached the end of the road. There were no more chances. I cannot go through this anymore and now with all this shit going on... We deserve to have some peace at the end Kate. Please understand, it's not because we don't love you. It's because we can't fucking stand you.

Oh please, you talk as if I killed someone mum! Im sorry I didn't turn out perfect like you wanted-

The phone cut off. She actually cut me off from her reality with the click of button. It wasn't even a click...a lazy moment of the finger and that's it... I'm gone from their lives.

Like millions of others, I cried myself to sleep that night. First it was pity, then anger and then... Just to get it all out. Once sleep came and I woke the next day, I'd accepted it.

The World of course went insane. For the first couple of days we had the news and social media to keep us informed of everything. The riots. The crime. The depravity. So much for humanity. But then, all that stopped as well.

It only takes two days for the World to just stop. Once every single person suddenly just doesn't give a shit... Its all done. Electricity went - no more lights, no more warmth. Thankfully I'd spent wisely as an introvert. I had a deluxe weighted duvet with special microfibres that retain your body heat. God praises those who late-night drunk shop.

You could also live off my supply of ramen noodles and cherry bakewells for a considerable amount of time, so I wasn't concerned with starving. I didn't have much of an appetite anyway. Finally, my brain decides food is no good when getting healthy is the least important factor in my life.

I know other people are with their families. Well, people who aren't rioting or going around unleashing their inner monster, just because they can. I've got a picture in my head of how I think the perfect family are holding up right now.

There's a mum. A dad. A son and a daughter. Their all grouped together in the living room, sitting in front of a massive open hearth fire playing monopoly and drinking hot chocolate. There's a Christmas tree as well, just for the sake of ensuring this cliché rings as true as possible.

The dad rolls a double and fist bumps the air.

"Oh Ronald... You did it again you lucky man," the mum croons whilst stroking his fringe to the side. He beams. The daughter crosses her arms and huffs.

"Not fair!" she says and scowls. Her brother puts his arm around her and leans his head on the side of hers.

"Now, now Lucy... Don't worry, I won't let daddy hurt you,"

The mum suddenly becomes stiff and looks at her son.

"What do you mean by hurt, Blake?" she asks, her voice a bit shaky.

The son looks at his dad who, pale as a ghost now tries to roll again.

"Nothing honey, I'm sure nothing at all. Come on I passed GO!"

The mum looks now at her daughter who is looking at the ground, shooting nervous glances at her dad. Blake is messing with the corner of the board, avoiding eye contact.

"Ronnie... What's going on?" she says now standing up warily. Another round of glances and finally it dawns on her.

"No...no...NO!"

I can't even pretend to know what a perfect family is. My mind so broken and ill from a lifetime of... Life.

Not a single person from my past has phoned me. Well they didn't when the battery was still working. I'll lie to myself until the end - they've probably been ringing non-stop since it went dead.

I'm alone. So utterly alone. And it's the end of the world.

I'm going to die in a couple of days and the only feeling that comes to me now as I sit here staring back at my shadowy image on that black screen mirror is - pathetic.

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