#i dont want to tag this too much and put myself on terfs dashes on purposd

[apollowned]

Ok, the femme and butch discourse was such an odd thing to watch as a Canadian on this website.

Because Femme is a real French word and people were taking pictures of shirts that said it in Canadian Forever21, and I was cracking up. People were honestly saying it was "cultural appropriation," as if in the men's section, there wasn't a shirt with the word "homme" on it. I remember vividly seeing a post on my dash of a person talking about the discourse, and they straight out said something like, "there is no legitimate way to use the word femme in the English language unless you are a lesbian." And I, of course, being the asshole I am, replied by merely writing "femme fatale." they were not happy. They ended up more or less saying, "that's not what I mean, and you know it," and they were right. What they meant is they didn't want bi women to have access to the word. They didn't want trans people using it.

It is pretty incredible how deeply ridiculous people made themselves look in an attempt to "purify" queer culture. I'll be honest, I looked at the discourse and was like, am I missing something? These people are speaking with such confidence they must have straightforward and legitimate reasons to feel this way. So I more or less left it alone and let it unfold without much comment. Now that it's settled, it is pretty obvious why people were saying what they were saying.

I'm not looking to convince anyone of anything; too many people have put their opinion on this discourse as a part of their identity for any attempt from someone who cares as little as I do to change it. But looking back, it is just so silly. The fake outrage, the drama, the weak arguments put forward. The thought of how many children were radicalized by terfs in that argument is less fun to think about. How many trans people and bi women were harassed. But the idea of these seventeen-year-olds messaging queer elders to "learn their history" is still a pretty absurd picture.

While I don't think everyone involved in that discourse was American, it was one of those fights that really showed precisely how American-centric this site is.

[zaaziedee]

Long ass rant cuz I don’t know how to put a read more on Mobile

I fucking hate guilt trip posts I fucking hate them

No matter the message, it all boils down to “if you don’t reblog this you’re a terrible person” and every time it makes me so uncomfortable. Like thanks I feel like a terrible person now because I chose not to share some words on a screen. That would have been on my blog that is for me. That has less than 100 followers.

I don’t even fucking reblog things I do like. I’d love to reblog fan art and memes but I have the need to tag everything and I don’t have energy for that. I want to reblog art and put compliments for every single one. But it’s too much for me. I reblog boost posts sometimes and even then I don’t feel like it really ever reached anybody or helped the poster/cause.

9/10 times I agree with the guilt tripping post as well, or even posts that state the obvious. I shouldn’t have to reblog, all trans folk are valid. I am trans! I know trans peeps are valid it was pretty obvious to me! I know terfs are the worst! For obvious reasons!!! I also do not like The “reblog if you agree” posts. If you like it and it reaffirms your stances, cool beans. It just gives me guilt tripping vibes that if I DONT reblog it that MUST mean I don’t agree which is almost never the case. I hate it!

It’s even worse when it’s a post that has a threat or insult attached to it (usually not op but still) like, “if you don’t reblog this you’re scum” or any kind of varient. Hmm wonder why that might make me feel like shit. Maybe other people on the internet have thicker skin but I read those kind of things like they had been spoken directly to my face, so yeah I’m not gonna reblog something that tries to attack me or anyone not daring to follow an order on a ducking social media website.

Can you just imagine? Some random stranger in real life coming up to you and saying “hey fat people are important and valid” and before you even have a chance to respond, a different stranger that over hears that scrambles over and gets into your personal space and very threateningly says, “ well do you agree? Or are you fatphobic scum who should die in a fire?” Like one 1) it’s weird that someone came up to me to state being fat is okay, but yeah I’m 100% in, I try to be as body positive as I can, I am a fat person myself and I accept that in me and others. But 2) then some other person yells at me? Demanding an answer? And that the correct choice for this person I’ve never met is to get a megaphone and shout both things that stranger 1 and stranger 2 said? And the selfish, bad behavior is to run away and ignore both statements?

In real life most people would run away. Most people would be taken aback at the least! Because that’s weird! I don’t understand why thats acceptable on the internet when it would not be (I hope) in real life! It gets into some people’s heads! I try to ignore it and I eventually will forget about it, but it doesn’t stop the fact it made me feel bad. Even if it was only for a minute. It’s not okay. And I know it makes others feel bad. I know others have worse anxiety than I do. So kudos to those that go back to the original source and just reblog the op post that doesn’t have explicit guilt tripping. I know the ops aren’t trying to guilt trip me, and it’s just my brain thinking too much about it.

If you ever catch me in real life and know me, I’ll talk day and night about various issues in the real world, but please don’t expect me to reblog it when I see it cross my dash board.