#i dont need girl scouts to be called girl and trans scouts

[asexual-means-no-attraction]

What do you think of historically “for women by women” organizations starting to include non-binary people in them? For example, the Autistic Women Network has recently changed to the Autistic Women and Non-Binary Network. Thoughts?

First I've heard of it. I think it would depend on if they actually include nonbinary people that were born men. Or if it's just nonbinary people that were born female.

Like, regardless of my thoughts on nonbinary as a whole, I can appreciate attempts at being inclusive. But if you're nonbinary (ie. Not a women) pushing yourself into a female space and pushing for a change in name without actually including amab nonbinary people then I have a really hard time supporting that you're even nonbinary to begin with. Sounds more like the whole gender role issue that I've talked about before. Feels like you're attached to being a women but not attached to the expectations it comes with-- which is not what being trans is about.

And yes I get that there is a gray area. Even as a trans man, there are female experiences that I relate to and have first hand experience with. But if I were to go to a female space for women for whatever reason, I would make it clear that I don't want to change the name of the space. I used to be a women, I can give input into the situation, but this space is still for women. I'm allowed to be a gray area, I'm allowed to be an exception without changing everything to include me. Because the group is for women. That's it's big thing. Bending over backwards to include every single exception, rather than letting it be a unwritten rule that they're included, takes away time, energy, and resources from the actual cause of the group. I just don't see the point. I'm fine. It's not a big deal.

[literallygeeway]

intro post!!

name: just call me caleb

age: dont wanna disclose but i am a minor so please dont be weird!!

pronouns: he/they idk

gender: maybe genderfluid, maybe transmasc, idk, still tryna figure that out

sexuality: possibly bi and ace though not sure

favourite artist: my chemical romance!!!

other favourite artists: bikini kill, mommy long legs, mitski, bratmobile, cat valley, hell baby, dazey and the scouts, wet leg, skinny girl diet, the muslims, voodoo church

other artists i just generally like (yes i love music): sonic youth, le tigre, the julie ruin, senses fail, funeral for a friend, pierce the veil, crass, x-ray spex, sloppy jane, pleasure venom, olivia jean, necromancy

hobbies: music (i can play bass, guitar, drums and piano), writing, photography, filmmaking, cinematography, drawing, making bracelets (though i need to do it more often)

some other stuff i like also includes: heathers the musical (off broadway) (its the only musical i really like), studio ghibli, the sims 4, omori, undertale, deltarune, stardew valley, ddlc, doctor who, the umbrella academy, the owl house, adventure time and scott pilgrim (the tv show, movie and game - i havent read the graphic novel but want to)

more stuff under the cut - dni, fun facts and some more stuff :3

fun facts!!!

my favourite colour is dark red

my favourite food is sushi

im learning japanese and french

my favourite movies are parasite (GO WATCH IT RN ITS AMAZING) and my favourite tv shows are i am not okay with this and the end of the f***ing world

i love wes anderson movies!! (my favourite is isle of dogs)

i had two fish called flamey and sir bubbles the fishington when i was younger but they both died so i flushed them down the toilet

i collect bottles and cans (mainly ramune bottles and one cool can but still), funko pops (i have two gerard way funko pops - the black parade with the facepaint and revenge red tie) and vinyls (mcr, mitski, bikini kill and the muslims)

dni!!!

basic dni like homophobic, transphobic, ableist, racist, pro-isreal, islamophobic, etc

mcr haters!! /hj

shipping irl people unless its a joke

transmeds and terfs

people who think trans men cant present femininely and trans women cant present masculinely (im a trans guy who wears skirts sometimes so suck my toe)

people who unironically think gerard way is a trans woman... guys he's said they use he/they pronouns and if he was a trans woman he would probably say something!!

please interact!!

mcr fans

riot grrrl fans (not problematic)

alternative people!!! (emo, punk, goth, scene, decora, etc)

just cool people in general :3

other stuff:

no need to use tonetags with me, dont worry about it

i use !!! and :3 and stuff like that a lot, and i also swear more than the average human should

im alternative but dont have a specific label as i dress in a mix of ways and listen to many different genres of music :3

on here i'm mainly gonna post about mcr, so if you dont like them you probably wont like most of the stuff i post :<

i will probably edit this as i think of more stuff to add and as my interests change but yeah <3

pinterest: calebisbrokenhearted

fav user: @darkermylovex (go follow her rn she is awesome!!)

fav songs currently:

okay thats all, have a great day, bye bye :3!!!!

[asclexe]

haii….intro post…..about me……

*flash/blink warning 4 the blinkies!

haiiii :3 i go bye cameron which is very nicknameable so have fun with that. also call me whatever 🔥🔥

gender-wise i’m a trans agender/nonbinary freak albeit masc leaning thing, i prefer they/them and he/him pronouns but i dont mind if u use it/its! feel free to use either!! 😛im like a boy and a bug/cat at the same time..

aromantic asexual aplatonic lesbian faggot thing. i think girls r pretty 😍

minor!!!!!!!!! im ageless online 4 my safety so B cool :3

star sign leo, personality type intj, white boy :\, i live in america so expect yeehaws and occasional politics, and im an atheist :3 also left-handed (i never shut up about this)! probably not neurotypical but i haven’t been diagnosed with anything yet. i might be depressed but im in school so idrc about that rn.

interest wise, im pathetically multifandom and i reblog a lot of house md because that’s my fyp, but i also enjoy doctor who (only on s5 lol), good omens (FUCK NEIL GAIMAN FUCK HIM FUCK HIM), warrior cats (on arc 5 and no intention of reading more), dungeon meshi, six feet under (s1 still lol), yellowjackets, fnaf, thg, a series of unfortunate events, doogie howser md, moral orel (s2) and soso many many more.. (i watch a lot of shows. i’m watching hannibal next!) digesting the saw franchise atm

for uhh music i listen to mainly tally hall/miracle musical, will wood, lemon demon, weezer, the smashing pumpkins, queen, destroy boys, chappell roan, dazey n the scouts, mitski, slipknot n mindless self indulgence n ayesha erotica n deftones n nickel creek (MONA!1!1!1!!!) + wayy more i love music

im also a theater kid! beware.

i enjoy mundane shit like writing, drawing, cooking, baking, reading and listening to music and watching tv and then carpe diem crap like kleptomania, theater, staying up past my bedtime, hiking/outdoors shit, being alone, doing crazy shit and having fun and

i run @ask-the-ducklings and @ppth-obgyn-dept-head-real for my house md oc and i’m 1/2 of @meanwhile-on-the-road :3

ughh sum things you should know be4 you follow or follow/unfollow or moot/unmoot me/boundaries

i am a very morbid (i think abt death literally all the time. lol), negative, cynical person and i always have been and i will not absorb those positive vibes. im a hater. im also opinionated like everyone else and im obviously going to have bad takes. B nice. sometimes the fun and joyous whimsy comes out.

i use a lot of profanity and i say the ONE. one slur i can reclaim.

i will not go to therapy or get help. i’ve been in therapy and it does not help me and i do not like it. i do not want help. i’m fine. please do not tell me “go to therapy u need it” because i do not need it

i say “im going to kill myself” a lot and these are all fruitless, meaningless statements. i am not committing suicide yet, and when i do, you’ll have long forgotten me. hopefully.

pls tell me via ask box, dm etc if i say something offensive or wrong or are overcrossing your boundaries, im sorry, im bound to make mistakes or misjudge a post.

i do not tag my reblogs with the media or characters, only little comments. i also do not spoiler tag my posts. i try to trigger tag things when i can but if you want something trigger tagged pls lmk!!

i do not have a dni, because the block button (which i use pretty often ill be honest) is easier, so instead i’d say go away bigots and zionists and pedos/zoos because your fucking lame and nsfw/kink blogs and most people over 21 (unless im comfortable with it) because i’m a minor.

despite all of this, i am very friendly and will probably want to talk to you!! i luv my mutuals!

i use #asclexeposting for all original posts + more

trying to figure out my ao3 situation but im on pinterest and discord under assclexe if you wanna hmu (B cool) and roblox as asclexe and my airbuds

old man doctor yaoi summer

house md oc

old intro

and all my other awesome mewtuals of which i have too many to tag but i love you all!!

blinkies made in the blinkie cafe

the rest is assorted, most from pinterest?

[candyclan]

Coming out letter to my mom. (FTM) At the start of my transition, I wanted to go by a name that started with an “A”because my birthname did. All the rest of it is basically the same.

THE TRUTH:

I didn’t scream “I am a boy” at my parents. Honestly, my mother (specifically) controlled a lot of what I did, who I hung out with, and what I wore as a child. I believe she has/had an idea about what she wanted out of a daughter since I was born, and really just lived through me. I think she eventually had to give me room to make my own decisions, later in life. I didn’t come out until I was 16, although I had spent 6 months prior to even coming out thinking about my gender identity. I was extremely sheltered. I want you guys to know that I didn’t know what being transgender was until I was a freshman in high school and met my best friend (who is STILL MY BEST FRIEND TODAY) who identified as Non-binary gender fluid. I had never really met someone AFAB that lived to be anything other than female. With that came the knowledge that sometimes, men don’t necessarily have to have penises and I can wear whatever I’m comfortable with. I used to be religious in middle school (raised Christian) but I never found god. It never made sense to me how so many people can put their faith in other people’s ideas of what god is (the Bible) but not listen when their real CHILD comes to them and tells them that they feel uncomfortable in their gender identity. I also came out as bisexual in middle school, after meeting a girl I had a fancy for. To which my mother sobbed and cried and asked how she had failed as a parent. I remember loving pink, it was my favorite color. Pink, purple, blue. My top 3. Now it’s blue, pink, purple but basically the same. I had a pink room, loved hello kitty, let my mom curl my hair with little curlers at night so I could wake up and be somebody different the next day. My brother played with carebears and my Barbie dolls more than I did as a child. I remember a toy gun and handcuffs. I was fairly experimental as a child, I did: Girl Scouts, swimming, piano, soccer, ballet, cheerleading, and more honestly. I always got “boy” toys at McDonald’s (I mean cmon they’re cooler) I just was kinda everywhere. I feel like that’s easier for someone AFAB to be. My brother was harassed by my family for liking girly things but I was never shown that I couldn’t like stereotypical “boy things” by extended family. My mother however in the line at McDonalds I could never forget, turned and looked at me (baseball cap backwards tank top and shorts)and said “So, what?” “Are you batting for the other team” implying that because of the clothes I liked to wear I would be a lesbian. My mother (like I said, kinda controlling and extremely narcissistic) when I was allowed to cut my hair super short for the first time I was 16. Afterwards she has said things like: “but you’re so pretty how could you have cut your hair” “you looked so nice with long hair” I never felt akin to femininity. I was actually VERY uncomfortable with it. I hated being the “weaker” gender. I never wanted my nails painted. It was torture. I acted like makeup and and nail polish was torture, the hairbrush was my enemy. I used to just put my hair up in a low ponytail every day as I got older. I knew she’d never let me cut it all off. Basically, other than wanting to grow up strong and tough and not liking to be treated like a female, I was female. There were parts of being female I didn’t really have a problem with, and honestly that’s why I didn’t come out for so long. I wasn’t in a house or raised by people I knew would accept anything other than me being their “little girl” I was a daddies girl. So between my lack of understanding of where my feelings towards my gender roles were coming from, being encouraged by my family to be girly, not being exposed to gender diversity (or anything queer), and my controlling mother, I remained in the dark about who I was.

TRIGGER WARNING:::(abuse)::::: I was never close with my mother, and actually hated her growing up. To this day she is the most judge mental, self-centered woman I know. My father was funny, charismatic, and lost his shit sometimes. I like to say, 90% of the time he was amazing. We made jokes and could literally finish each other’s sentences. But honestly my father, 10% of the time was abusive. Most of my abuse in my life was covert (narcissistic abuse from my mother) and verbal/emotional/barely physical abuse from my father. He’s 6”3’ 350 lbs and very loud and scary, especially to a young child. He punched a hole in my wall, he threw a remote at a wall and shattered it to pieces, he threatened to kill my dog with a baseball bat in front of me. Which I swear to god he would have done if I wasn’t holding my dog, protecting him. These moments were few and far between, but they were riddled with insults and almost always left me with less than I started with. My father did spank my brother and I, and one time he clapped my brother so well that he left a purple hand mark on his butt. My mother told my father she’d take us away if that happened again. My father never left marks. He never had to, he was so big and would just get up in my face and scream at me. He made me feel helpless. Because he was invading my space I felt physically threatened, and he never actually had to touch me and leave bruises because that threat was already implied by invading my space. I was so young, but I always knew my family wasn’t right. Finally at 16, I stood up to my father for the first time. I didn’t care if he was bigger than me, I didn’t care if I would lose, I was willing to fight for me. Anyway, long story short the police were called because we were screaming at each other in front of his apartment building. I’m not going to say I didn’t fuck up as a teenager, but I never deserved the pressure and the abuse he was dishing out and had dished out my whole life. I knew that. I cut him out of my life just after turning 16, by then I had been questioning my identity. It became easier after leaving my father to fall into who I was. My father is FAIRLY religious and my mother claims to be but she never talks about god, she never prays, and now that my father and her are divorced I don’t think she’s been inside a church since. Losing my father was a lot, despite his abuse he and I were really close and had really similar personalities. The reality of abuse isn’t “well, now I see them as an abuser so now none of that good stuff is left it’s all tainted” I had to struggle with losing someone very important in my life at a young age, for myself.

Arguments against me being trans:

My family has been a bit divided in responding to me coming out. By now, it’s been about 4 years.

My mother and her side of the family are in denial. They don’t understand how I can’t be a “lesbian that just likes boy things”. They don’t use my name or pronouns.

My father, what little communication I have with him now, is bewildered. He and I had a discussion this past Christmas where I brought up what his abuse did to me mentally and he apologized but then tried to say “well what about your part in all of this” and said that I was hanging out with crazy depressed people, cutting myself, doing drugs, (I was smoking weed and I’ve tried acid like once piss off) and was sneaking out. Yeah. I did do all of that BUT GUESS WHAT. IM 20. I go where I wanna go. I fuck who I wanna fuck. I smoke what I want and guess what? It’s not any different from when I was 16 except now I don’t have parents up my ass telling me what to do. His argument basically was that I need to own up to what I did too and that fucking angered me. You don’t apologize and then go “well what about you” that’s not an apology. That’s deflection and honestly I don’t think I need to apologize because my parents were super controlling. I was just trying to do what I wanted and they didn’t like it. He and I have talked about me being trans and he pretty much thinks I’m certifiable. Doesn’t use my name or pronouns.

My brother: Ethan, my brother and I have always been close. He’s 17 now, and he had a different reaction to me being trans. Of all of my family he was the most receptive to my pleas of gender dysphoria and he suffers with anxiety so he gets stuff. But alas, after asking him if he’d call me by my name and pronouns (after 4 years of being out) he thinks that I am the one that has an issue with society. I told him I was starting T soon and he said: “Hrt won’t lessen all the things that come with being transgender. If you feel like doing hormones is the best for you then do it, but from a logical standpoint I think there just needs to be more thickening of skin” he claimes that if I try hard enough I could be fine living as female. Doesn’t use my name or pronouns.

None of my family supports me. None of my family understands. And none of them ever will. I have been out for four fucking years. I can’t tell you how frustrating family rejection can be. I have cried so much at the idea of not having a supportive family. I feel like I was ripped away from a beautiful life somewhere and thrust into this mess.

Honestly though, it doesn’t matter, the world keeps spinning and I keep finding people who love and accept me for who I truly am. I have made peace with my family’s lack of acceptance. It’s made me stronger and more compassionate towards others. Made me want to be better than them. I am actually going to start hormones soon, and on top of other fears I have, will be cutting my family out of my life. I can’t be 25 with a full beard and getting misgendered by my family. I can’t do it. They may feel like I’m going too far, that I don’t have to do this, but I do. I’m not doing this because I didn’t get too much attention as a kid or my mom favored my brother over me, I’m not doing this because it’s cool, I’m not doing this because I’m bored, I’m not doing this because I hate myself or anyone else. This is AFFIRMATION. Sometimes, cutting people who can’t see you for who your really are out of your life is affirming too.

Guys, girls, people, keep your head up. Things get better, I know. I thought life was never going to get better so I know that’s what it can feel like. But it does. Never ever let someone control your life or who you are. You’re beautiful/handsome/amazing! You deserve to be comfortable in your own skin and to love who you are. I am getting there, we all are.

Love,

Tanner M.