#i dont have anought motivation to go throught all the years

[kitchen-box]

You know when I said I would update on the dark sides reaction if Harry was pining on Voldemort.

Yeah, I only meant Snape.

Only to make things clear here

Harry has s crush on Voldemort in every form

Quirell? The most beautiful man EVER with a pretty sick turban too bad it hurts when he looks at it for too long

Diary Tom? That's basically canon

Ginny while possessed by diary Tom? Harry is veeery confused why he notices Ron's sister is pretty only sometimes

Snake Voldemort? I mean, I heard the Victorian era women used to want to have really white skin so they marinated it in powder. And he is OLD. So maybe he saw his mother put it on and he liked it so he decided to recreate the look??? Who cares?! It's the '90, for Merlin's saggy tits... Is Harry a monster fucker??

The rest of the horcruxes? They really are veeery pretty. Even more than that 100 karate necklace on the teli that aut Petunia was dropping hints to wanting

P.S.:'words' are thoughts ;'words' are Parseltongue also words are actions and gestures but you get that from context already

Anyways, to get back on track with Dark Side *coughs* Snape *coughs*

I want to make memes featuring Snape having meltdowns from to much stress from this bullshit.

So I am going to make memes

First year

Harry *staring at Quirell*: singh's audibly

Snape, begining to feel uncomfortable: glares to establish dominance

Harry, startled, not knowing what else to do: waves awkwardly

Quirell, also startled: waves back

Harry, lovestruck: giggles and accidentally spills his drink over Ron

Ron, who has the emotional range of a spoon: annoyed gremlin noises

Snape, recognising that look anywhere: drops his fork

Dumbledore, literal genius, watching the whole time: confused headmaster noises

Second Year

Snape, bringing potions to the infirmary because Harry bloody Potter and co. decided to fight a basilisk and there are literal petrified children (in this day and age): 'How the fuck did I get here?'

Harry, who doesn't have glasses and is high af, seeing Snape walk past his bed: Wanna hear about the really pretty boy I killed??

Snape: stops walking and stares at Harry

Harry, still high on some kind of medical fairy dust: He had a really handsome face. It was too perfect now that I think about it. That should have been my first sign that he was Voldemort trapped in a diary

Snape having an urgent need to sit down: tears up from stress

Harry 'I one mistook Dumbledore for a snitch' Potter: Well not really Voldemort, 16 year old him, but it was Voldemort so I said Voldemort. Anyways you should have seen his eyes. They were really pretty. Like I would have joined him if he asked me to, just so I could look at his eyes forever...

Snape, sits down on the foot of Harry's bed: Shhh, shhhh. Oh, would you look at the time? It's time to shut the fuck up and go to bed.

Snape: tucks Harry into bed and pat's his cheek semi- lovingly

Snape: It's also time for a bottle of fire whiskey. Ruffles Harry's hair in hope he'll finally go to bed and not tell him how handsome the Dark Lord is

Harry, not really understanding what is going on but this man is nice even if he is blurry so he'll do as the nice man asks: okay

Harry: Can you also gime me a kiss?

Snape: Ask Albus

Harry: Okay, who's Albus??

Snape: ...

Snape: Just go to bed before anyone gets hurt

Harry: Who's gonna get hurt?

Snape, full bullshitting mode at this point: The pretty boy you killed

Harry: le gasp

Harry, very seriously: Plot twist

Snape, also very seriously, nodding in agreement: Fucking plot twist