#i don't usually ramble like that publicly about characters

[ricemilk413]

I voted "only a little" but should've voted "No" or "my feelings are complex" so I'm writing my opinion anyway. (Pardon my english, it's my 2nd language.)

Partially because, she's my favorite character but like, I like her arc as it is?

This is Homestuck. I could count the characters with a "satisfying arc" on the fingers of one hand. Let alone have most of the fandom agree on that.

Her arc is better and happier than our main character's! not even speaking about Jade. And Putting my personal opinions of "and thats ok because that's not what homestuck is offering us" and "let's stop obsessing over which character "deserved" what from the narrative" aside (since I'm noticing what blog this is)

Again, she's my favorite character, and the thing is. I relate to her a lot. I've related to her since the beginning. With the darkness that draws us in, with the need to be overly smart to the point of being pretentious lest we won't be treated seriously, with the role of alcohol in our family lives full of neglect and loneliness. And may I say. The role of lesbianism in our eventual salvation. I liked the symbolism of her going grimdark, and then being a god of light. As someone recovering from depression and embracing the more obnoxiously positive parts of myself. I like how her problems didn't stop at her literal rebirth, that she was allowed to be messy and try to cope with her past. And DAMN the amount of people I've heard trying to introduce others to homestuck and mentioning her lesbian wedding!! The celebration of that, how important it is to people! For people to talk like this about the "end" of her arc is huge!

And yet Rose says her arc is stupid. Well, first of all I don't agree. I myself adore Jasprose. It's a representation of all the fun, quirky and horny that Rose tries to keep in check at all times gone loose. She's unapologetically herself, a little sapphic cheshire cat. And although that wouldn't work too well in society. She's free from it! Being a sprite is the ultimate freedom! (unless you're merged with someone you don't vibe with) which is ironic for something made to be a guide, but that's what irrelavance in homestuck gives you. There is however a payoff that i'm gonna mention later.

But it's not too late. Retcon happens for once, and the Rose which we've been following (WHICH PEOPLE TEND TO FORGET. JASPROSE IS OUR ROSE) gets to live anyway. And there's something sad about that because she's now "the other rose" (that due to its textuality and fandom bias is much more explored with davesprite, but its not like it's not shown with jasprose) and i think those are emotions that jasprose cannot express. So she does the next best thing. She looks for someone who will fill that hole in her heart. Hmm I dunno. Someone her and especially the cat part of her already had a connection with? Maybe thinking that she could do a do-over? (but thats just speculation on my part)

So, from the beginning:

We had Rose who was very active in the story because she had to, doing badass things, we had Rose rebel against the game, grow to power while under manipulation that she thought she was too smart not to fall for, isolating herself from her friends in the meantime. She had her big going berserker moment. (that ultimately was a bit undercut but that's hs for you) She had a dramatic suicide mission that ultimately helped her grow closer to her estranged brother, leading to a rebirth that flipped her entire aesthetic and our perception of her (which was teased before by her planet and the fact that she liked it) she then actively became a guide to her friends, and pursued the relationship she wanted. Then fumbled with that relationship due to her past crushing down on her, we spend act 6 exploring her relationship with her mother, juxtaposed against her current relationship with kanaya that offered her that which she didn't have before, because let's be clear, drunken affection cannot replace real communication and emotional availability and Rose finds herself mirroring her mother in that regard, probably not knowing how to create and keep intimate and genuine relationships that she's not undercutting with her sarcasm and superiority complex.

Then game over comes and she's the ONLY death that is given time and weight, as Rose regrets not letting kanaya in due to her problems. And now it's too late.

And what happens in the epilogues and hs2 is a completely other can of worms! And that doesn't mean I hate it personally.

Going back to Rose prime, I just like that she was helped by her fellow light player and a bit sad that we couldn't see it happen (but i dunno, i think davekat fans got fucked over even more there)

takes a deep breath

AND IN THE END. Rose gets to "reunite" with her mom, or rather explore their relationship in a more healthy and constructive manner. She gets to have a family, she gets to MARRY KANAYA and be HAPPY.

Concluding this huge thing. I think Rose's character arc was cool actually. We can all be bitter about our favorite characters being side-lined or not treated with the weight and consideration that we give them. But maybe that's the point. For us to give them that??

But anyway I think on the scale of Dave Strider and idk…Nepeta? Feferi? of character arc completness/satisfaction she's much closer to Dave.

Consider not only how she was handled, but how you wish she was handled, and if you think she had any potential that was unused.

[wayward-aeon]

the peculiar intersections of plurality and fictionkinity

having been inspired by the discussions at the currently ongoing convention, i decided to clean up and post this ramble that's been sitting in my drafts for a while.

i don't usually talk about systemhood publicly, but i had an interesting experience some time ago that i thought might be worth sharing.

~400-500 words

once upon a few years ago, there was a fictive who occupied the host position of my collective. however, after a series of complicated internal developments, this fictive merged into the primordial identity soup, also known as me!

that fictivity and the relevant source material is still a part of me. i wouldn't be who i am now without it. but i view it in a similar fashion to how one might view a kintype they had in youth, and later grew out of as they learned more about themselves and who they really are.

fast forward to late 2022. i was watching a new show, and one of the characters struck me as uncomfortably familiar. i felt like i was looking at myself; specifically, the self i thought i had discarded like shed skin several years ago. i couldn't shake the feeling that this character was me, in a way that not even i was me anymore. i reacted by sweeping it all under a rug (which, spoiler, never works), until last month i finally felt bold enough to try and confront it.

to paraphrase what i said to @/contractbound when i was confiding in him about it: "its as if the me that identifies with [my fictive self] has a kintype of [the character i'm questioning]. and since that's still technically me, i still feel that connection. i still recognize [that character] as me. but with, like, a degree of separation due to the fact i don't really identify with the fictive part of myself anymore." like some kind of kintype once removed, or something.

he responded with my new favourite way to describe the situation; "it's like, that's you, but also not you, because you is not you." he also called it "the lacroix of being 'kin". i really don't think i can explain it better than that lmao

since then, although acceptance has been slow-going thanks to the complicated nature of…whatever this is, i am at least learning to give it a spot at the table rather than beat it with sticks. part of why i'm writing this is in the hopes that getting it into the open will help the process along, and maybe even reach anyone who may be in a similar situation.

if you, too, have been sipping the fictionkin lacroix, just know you aren't alone.

[marihem]

Let me be the one to ask. How did you come up with this Queerplatonic Frans concept? What drew you into making this?

Aww thank you for asking such a delicious question, pal! Hope you're ready to listen to my 1 am rambles XD

Alright so, to be completely honest...I actually don't truly know how Romance works to execute it myself 😬

Haha yup, sadly, the concept of Romance and Romantic Attraction didn't naturally come to me my whole life and I had a hard time understanding them. (Skill issue, amiright?) So I learned about them through fiction. And even then, my understanding of Romance was a little bit different from what it's usually is (spoiler: it wasn't actually Romance, the word I needed was "Queerplatonic").

I've drawn ship arts before I started drawing Frans and let me tell you, almost all of them were 2 characters just standing next to each other, no hugs, no kisses. Maybe they'll look at each other with fondness. And I was like "hell yeah, I've achieved Romance 😌" pfft.

My 2020 Frans works were where my ship art skills got improved. But you can still see that they aren't explicitly romantic (like, the first time I drew a Frans forehead kiss was for a request). Whatever, I was drawing stuffs about my fav lil guys and I was happy... and yet a tiny part of me wasn't feeling it, like it felt...odd to call them romantic. All these shippy art and I still felt uncomfortable to draw something extremely Romantic. (...this kinda sounds similar to a comphet kind of situation, you get what I'm saying?)

2 years later, I learned about the term "queerplatonic" and just like that, everything made sense =o Now THAT'S the kind of relationship I've been thinking about all these years and it felt magical. Suddenly, with this new knowledge, drawing shippy art felt more comfortable for me, cozy even. Cuz now, the "romance" I'm making is like something a little special for me.

And then I thought "what if I...👀" I grabbed Frisk and Sans like figurines and used them to make my own little ideas of a queerplatonic relationship as they were the perfect materials to work with for me.

I've actually been busying myself with thinking up ideas for them a year before I revealed it to my mutuals, even long before I revealed it publicly 😅

Still, my Roommate Banter AU Frans is still classic romantic. I've only been making funny lil contents of them but I swear! They're secretly crushing on each other, there's romance underneath! I just suck at Romance 😭

So yeah, TL:DR, I don't completely understand romance so I did what I felt comfortable and did actually get the most, approach a ship with a queerplatonic lens.

Tho I'm still learning about Romance cuz there're other ships I'd love to draw shippy art for XD

Anyways, yeah thank you to anyone who read all of this and thank you dear anon for indulging me with your ask <3 Have a lovely day/night ^^

[legendary-guest]

Commenting/reviewing fanfiction is a sure fire way to ensure that a fandom develops a community, which in turns encourages authors, from beginners to veterans, to continue writing. So, how do you engage with fanfic authors in a way that's meaningful and reflective of your appreciation for their work? - Read a fic more than once: Perhaps the best piece of advice I can provide to prep anyone for reviewing. You don't have to do it right after a first read (but hey, some stories are just that good!), you can wait and come back to it. A few hours, a day, a week, maybe longer depending on the time you have. When you return, read again or skim through, and jot down your thoughts. You will find they are much more coherent, and potentially constructive, than on your first reading. - Whatever sticks out to you, mention in your review: This will naturally happen in your time away from a fic, even if you forget the whole story. This is a pretty good sign that you enjoyed it! You should share this enjoyment, and with wild abandon, in your review! - Speculate and ask: If you have questions, ask them! If you are speculating, if you have a particular reading that you have lifted from a story, mention it! Authors, on the whole, tend to be very receptive to alternative views of their work. The exciting part in reviewing publicly is seeing what other readers have noticed that you haven't. It helps to generate a buzz, a hype, especially for multi-chapter fanfics. - Improvement doesn't happen in a vacuum, provide constructive criticism: Now, con. crit. has been deemed a social faux pas in the past decade or so in fandom that originates from this website. However, if you enjoy a story from an author but they have spelling errors, grammatical errors, even something more 'serious' like aspects of a story that aren't working, you should mention it, because it will stop them making similar mistakes in future. They can improve faster with your input. It also shows other fans that it is okay to make mistakes. Some authors take con. crit. poorly, either due to their age or other factors. You can usually tell the general maturity of an author by their writing and if they have responded to other commenters. Either way, their reaction to your con. crit. is their own, not yours. - Only review what you like: Reviewing should be enjoyable for you, the reader. Just like rambling on your Tumblr blog about character of the week, reviewing/commenting is your opportunity to do this on the website the fic is hosted on, whether that's AO3, FF.Net, or, reblogging a fic and adding your comment/review in your reblog. For you, the reader, it is there to develop a deeper appreciation for the story that you have read. You provide a knock-on effect in helping out the author, helping out other readers and fostering a community of people who can be open with their opinions, viewpoints, which in turn, generates more public discussion, more fan work, etc. Who should be reviewing fanfic? Everyone that reads fanfic! A more realistic answer would be people who have time to read fanfic but not write their own. Reviewing is a good way to engage in community without devoting a lot of your own creativity to it - you can even remain totally anonymous, depending on the platform. Reviewing can take a long time, or a short time, depending on the story. It's fun to find out! But remember, you shouldn't rush to get a review out for anyone, you work on it in your time and on your terms. Reviewing is for you, too! This is your chance to talk about what you love with someone who will be receptive to your enthusiasm - the author. If you want to get into fanfic, but have no idea where to start, I would suggest reviewing first! You will develop an eye for the style of writing that you like, particular characterisations you enjoy, amongst many other things. You might be inspired by other fanfics, too! Have an idea for a prequel, sequel, midquel for a fic you've read? What about an idea you saw in a fic that you'd love to explore more?

Or an alternative path/story that you saw but the author didn't take? Reviewing will help you to realise this.

You will enjoy fanfiction a lot more this way, too. Legacy fandoms, such as that of Star Trek, Star Wars, etc. have more staying power due to, not just the constant influx of official content, but because the people that write fanfiction have people who review them, and who review and critique them, respectfully.

I would love to see more people review! It's a really powerful gift that is at your disposal, dear reader. Who else can claim to bring those back from the dead? It could be you, it could be you…

[magneticmage]

What are people's thoughts on a transgender Brosca or Aeducan?

Like we're told that Orzammar's caste system is based on one's same-sex caste, right? But, like, how complicated are someone's feelings towards their sex and how it differs from their preferred gender when the entire foundation of their culture is so sex segregated?

(Disclaimer; I'm cisgender so I'm not sure how to word all of this right without coming off as lacking understanding of nuances, accidentally coming off as rude and ignorant, or something, but I will do my best. Please be understanding that I am trying to NOT be rude, just might be a bit ignorant on phrasing things? Under a cut because it can be a bit ramble-y and maybe off-topic in some spots)

So transgender Brosca/Aeducan thoughts are hard to word, especially since I usually play my main ones as being cisgender, but even that is...a whole field of Thoughts.

Like I am aware that cisgender female Aeducan should actually be a different caste (probably some kind of noble or upper warrior caste, if I had to warrant a guess but your mileage may vary) than she is, but is considered functionally royalty in what probably amounts to no small part of her being her father's favorite child (because who cares about rules when your father is the king?). And that cisgender female Brosca is already defying some form of cultural expectation by being a casteless Carta thug rather than being a noble hunter like her sister Rica (nothing against Rica here, as I adore her, but Brosca not being one definitely seems to be a Choice, ya know?).

And if they are lesbian or any other orientation that isn't heterosexual, this also has added dimensions of its own as well. All of which is super interesting on how it comments on Orzammar society. Blah blah blah.

But like....what about transwoman Aeducan? Or transman Brosca?

Like how accepting is Orzammar society of such a thing? I'd assume not very much because of all the implications around potentially changing castes, which is socially frowned upon? Like it may not as big a deal for someone whose parents are roughly equal in terms of caste, but when there's a huge disparity between social ranks like, say, a noble lord and a servant caste mother? And, to digress slightly, it does make me wonder if some lower caste/casteless mothers have ever tried to pass off their assigned female children as sons, regardless of gender identity, all in hopes of a better life for their children. Like how Mary Reed's mom dressed her as a boy to keep getting money from her father's family. I mean, that's happened in our world to some extent as well. And how would someone whose intersex be viewed in this society? Do they just...like get to choose? Or is it a guess?

I don't have any answers.

Back to Brosca and Aeducan though.

How much does Trian's sexist comments about women being breeding flesh sting an Aeducan who views themself as a woman and choses to be one? Does their father most likely acknowledging them as his daughter publicly affect things? What about a Brosca that knows that their assigned sex at birth matching Kalah's is what cost them whatever caste their father was? How do they see those born the same sex as them that then go on to become noble-hunters wishing for a son, so their lives can get better? Does it make them angry or sad? Maybe a mixture of feelings?

Like I know that suffering and issues like these are not all that makes up a transperson's identity and I'm not saying it has to either. I know that some people face enough of these kinds of issues in the real world and would rather not have to deal with it in their video games and that's also okay. They can just decide their character is trans and not make it a big deal and that's a perfectly okay thing to do!

But I just...I have questions and am curious about how it might work in cases where they might want it to be a big deal? Is that a bad thing? That or maybe I worded things badly here or in a way that doesn't quite hit the mark because I'm not transgender?

If anyone else wants to weigh in here with their thoughts, like, please do? Or if there's better worded-meta out there, let me know because I'd love to read it.

Thanks for your time.

[honey-dandelion]

Hello everyone !! My name is AD, 19 and my pronouns are she/her!! I am a multi muse, filipino roleplayer/writer!!

I am quite new to the rp community in tumblr so please understand that I'm inexperienced. This blog is mostly to find more reigen rp partners who can giggle and ramble with me about Ron Weasley!

Currently, i am into Harry Potter!! I’d like to preface and say I do NOT support anything JK Rowling has said (as I am bi myself) and any transphobic statements she’s made is something I will never agree with.

My current hyperfixation character as of the moment is actually Ron Weasley! He’s my favorite character by far and I can go on and on about rambling towards him :3 though he doesn’t have to be my main actually! Im looking for any Ron role players :D as long as I get to write ships or just in general, sweet stories about him.

I have a few set of rules i would also like to make as a seperate post but as of right now, i will be writing them here so please take the time to read them in case you ever want to write or just simply chat with me about anything!!

* Main muses are Harry Potter, Hermione Granger, Theodore Nott and Draco Malfoy! I can also do the Weasley family and can even do Ron as well if preferred!

* usually write on discord and prefer to have a server for all the rps. I draw, write and speed out ideas a LOT btw so please be warned. I'm a rambler and I really love Ron a lot and want to interact with people who love it or just generally love Ron as much as I do!

* I am a big romance shipper but I also love writing platonic relationships between characters! Like family found dynamics and such. I am also a rare shipper kind of gal- like shipping Draco and Ron sometimes LOL

* I write mostly romance for aged up/adult characters

* I can word vomit and write long replies a lot- it's how I usually write so please don't feel pressured to write the same length as me!!

* Via discord rp; PLEASE tell me if I write something that ever makes you uncomfortable- I can edit it out and such, I don't mind as long as everyone feels safe.

* I'm really biased with Ron. I can be ooc with him a bit so please do not attack me if you have any problems with my mischaracterization of him. I am only here to have fun and write, to indulge myself with people. I don’t mind ooc

* I have school and responsibilities from my parents so if I don't answer, I'm probs asleep, working or @ college

* Lasty; Dont be shy with interacting with me! I am always happy to make mutuals and friends around here! I would love to answer any questions- either in character or just questions you would want to know about me!! So please dont be shy :D

• FOR NSFW STUFF; PLEASE STOP HERE WHEN YOU FEEL UNCOMFORTABLE WITH THE TOPIC. THANK YOU AGAIN.

• I usually just write doms/tops and I can get pretty hardcore with smut writing — please tell me if there is any kinks or stuff in smut you don't want to read! I also like dark topics but absolutely no adult/kid. That shit is not allowed in my rp blog. I'm very into some dark content and such but if that's not your cup of tea, please avoid the " DARK TOPIC // " tag.

• I only write nsfw of adult characters and ocs; cant do erp via me. I will only do them via discord as I am way too shy to write them publicly. PLEASE NOTE THOUGH that i will not just write on a whim. I will be able to make headcanons and such but i need to get to know you and feel comfortable enough to write it. I do write suggestive content here and there so my tags here will be " NSFW // " in case you ever want to avoid it.

[imakemywings]

You have some of the best takes on the events that happened in Silmarillion and I wanted to know your opinion/stance on something. Do you consider Fingolfin an 'usurper' when Feanor and Finwe left in exile? Because as someone new in the fandom (there's honestly a lot to unpack), so many interpretations/takes believe he was actually trying to usurp Feanor (*sighs* typical feanorian apologists/followers). I myself didn't see him as a usurper, I thought he was taking the initiative to become a leader because his father (I understand Finwe was well-loved more than Indis, but he pisses me off on so many levels, dude was so bad at being a dad, he should've never desire for more children if he's going to neglect them in the end) joined Feanor (eww favoritism) in exile and that left Tirion kingless. So why were people whining that he was a 'usurper'? I'll never get that.

Aw thank you, I'm glad you enjoy them! (*/ω＼*) This book really gets my brain whirring. There is definitely a lot to unpack, and my views on events and characters has absolutely changed in the last two years since I first read the book and have had more time to re-read it and reflect.

Fingolfin as a usuper is a fanon notion and it's not one I buy into. I think it goes hand-in-hand with the take that Feanor and Fingolfin are both equally responsible for the state of their relationship, which is not true. Feanor began this, Feanor escalated it, and Feanor was the first to bring weapons and deadly threats into it. Even if Fingolfin at times retaliated or started squabbles of his own, I still see Feanor as the primary instigator of their "rivalry," particularly considering it's noted that he also doesn't like Finarfin (it's just that he sees Fingolfin, as Indis' oldest son, as a greater threat, so Fingolfin gets more of his (negative) attention).

Going under a cut because as usual I rambled lol

However, I don't really agree that Finwe was a notably terrible father. I mean certainly you can read that into it, it's just not how I prefer to read it. Finwe made mistakes, as many parents in Silm did, but I don't think he didn't love his other children or that he obviously and outright preferred Feanor to the others, and I don't see any evidence that he neglected Indis' kids. I think he followed Feanor into exile because he felt very strongly Feanor had been wronged by the Valar and wanted to make a statement about it, and perhaps he felt he needed to be even more vocal in taking Feanor's side throughout his life because of what happened with Miriel (particularly given Feanor's tendency to view himself as the victim already). It is also relevant to note I think that they were most likely all adults when this happened, so it's not that he was abandoning minor children.

Was it irresponsible to leave Tirion kingless? Yeah, totally. Right after their crown prince was exiled for publicly threatening the life of his own family member? Bound to be a chaotic time in the city (relative to the past, not to things to come :')) Finwe is someone who I can see being a little myopic--he's not always good at seeing alternative perspectives once he's staked his own out and it causes him not to see the consequences that might come of his actions. But character flaws like this are what make them interesting to me, because it makes me curious how one as beloved as Finwe nevertheless ends up making several crucial mistakes that help set the stage for the rebellion of the Noldor.

As to Fingolfin, I think his willingness to forgive Feanor--and Feanor's tacit rejection, or at least failure to accept--says a lot about the state of their relationship. Now you could argue Fingolfin was just doing a PR move--even that he knew or suspected Feanor would not accept his forgiveness, which would make Feanor look completely unreasonable next to Fingolfin--but I tend to think he was genuine, because I think Tolkien would have said or hinted if he'd done it with an eye towards his own image.

First, when Feanor is first brought before the Valar for judgement for threatening Fingolfin's life, and it is revealed that he has been influenced by Melkor, there's this:

"...and Mandos said to him: '...for twelve years thou shalt leave Tirion where this threat was uttered...But after that time this matter shall be set in peace and held redressed, if others will release thee.' Then Fingolfin said in answer: 'I will release my brother.' But Feanor spoke no word in answer, standing silent before the Valar."

Even here, where Feanor is on trial for drawing a weapon on him--which has NEVER happened in Tirion--Fingolfin still refers to Feanor as his brother, and Feanor does not acknowledge it. Fingolfin, if he truly wanted to usurp Feanor, could have easily refused to release Feanor or make amends, and perhaps Feanor would have then been subject to longer banishment or other additional punishment. But he doesn't seem to hesitate to offer his release.

Then, the moment on Taniquetil when Manwe calls them all to the home of the Valar:

"Nevertheless he [Feanor] met Fingolfin before the throne of Manwe, and was reconciled, in word; and Fingolfin set at naught the unsheathing of the sword. For Fingolfin held forth his hand, saying: 'As I promised, I do now. I release thee, and remember no grievance.' Then Feanor took his hand in silence; but Fingolfin said: 'Half-brother in blood, full brother in heart will I be. Thou shalt lead and I will follow. May no new grief divide us.' 'I hear thee,' said Feanor. 'So be it.'"

This encounter follows a similar structure to the first: Fingolfin offers forgiveness, Feanor neither accepts nor openly rejects it. Once again, Fingolfin had his life threatened by Feanor's tantrums; he has every right here to be angry and withhold his forgiveness, but he doesn't. Not only does he release Feanor from the consequences of his actions, he really seems to be trying to heal the bond between them. Again, you can disbelieve that he's genuine here--but I read this as sincere, and I think Tolkien would've told us if it wasn't, or even if Fingolfin had ulterior motives in addition to wanting to heal this divide.

The only time during Feanor's life when Fingolfin really competes with him is during the Flight of the Noldor. Fingolfin leads the larger host of the Noldor to Alqualonde, but this occurs by choice of the Noldor, not because Fingolfin was trying to steal Feanor's following. He comes along only because he doesn't want to leave those who would follow Feanor to Feanor's whims, given how unreasonable and unpredictable he's been lately, and more of the Noldor are willing to follow Fingolfin than to follow Feanor. He could have also chosen to remain behind in Tirion, where he could have made a very easy claim on the throne--but he goes along, because he's convinced it's the right thing to do.

Part of the point of Feanor's mindset in Aman is that it was unfounded, until his own actions seem to give him confirmation he was right. If Fingolfin really had been gunning for his position, then Feanor was not paranoid, and his fears were not unfounded, and to me that undermines a central pillar of the pre-Darkening situation in Tirion, which is that Feanor was terrified of something that would never come, which Melkor took advantage of by making him believe it was coming. Feanor is afraid that Fingolfin will take his place--and by Feanor's own actions Fingolfin ends up ruling in Tirion. But Feanor doesn't see that connection in his madness--he sees only that what he feared has come to pass, even just temporarily.

"With him into banishment went his seven sons...Thither also came Finwe the King, because of the love he bore to Feanor; and Fingolfin ruled the Noldor in Tirion. Thus the lies of Melkor were made true in seeming, though Feanor by his own deeds had brought this thing to pass..."

A key phrase here is lies of Melkor. Melkor LIED when he told Feanor that Fingolfin wanted to take his place. He saw Feanor's fears and insecurities and found some lies that Feanor would be all too willing to believe, and made sure they were whispered into Feanor's ears, so that he would take them as truth.

All of this says to me that Fingolfin had no designs on the throne, that Feanor imagined or created their rivalry himself, and that Melkor simply took advantage of Feanor's irrational fears which he had never put to bed after his father's remarriage.

So to sum up this whole thing: No, I don't buy "Fingolfin the Usurper."

[felixstudios]

Bellringer Art Set

I made a whole bunch of Bellringer art for a little project! And also because he is my current obsession because I cycle through like 20 Cogs to obsess over.

There's 1 PFP, 1 phone background, and 2 desktop backgrounds. These are free to use privately and free to use publicly with credit!

Extra ramblings about the art process below

The PFP was meant to make him look kinda like even when he was super tired, he'd still retain his elegant looks. I mean, he already does look tired all the time, but I was trying to lean into that a little bit. I struggled a lot with the upturned collar since that was actually my first time really drawing it LOL, but I still think it turned out okay.

The phone background was meant to look a little hotter, but uh... I don't think my intentions came across. I struggled SO much to draw the hand and I remember sending around "Biblically accurate Bellringer" which was just all the arm/hand sketch layers being visible because I'd made so many attempts. I do struggle to draw actual hands so the hand was no surprise to me, but the arm too? Seriously? That's usually like, one of the easiest parts of a drawing for me... But on the bright side, it still turned out alright. I think I'll be keeping anatomically incorrect Cathal as my phone wallpaper for now though {I <3 anatomically incorrect Cathal he's so cute even with his weird hand and his misshapen gear neck}.

The desktop backgrounds I'm definitely most proud of. I was complaining to my boyfriend about how I wanted a full piece for the set but wasn't sure if I'd have enough time, and he only said "ocean" in response which I think was meant to be a joke. For me, though, it was a stroke of genius because I realized I can just make a simple background. So, I drew the night/sunset sky. However, all the purples I was using for shading clashed WAY too much with the established style of the rest of the set, so I reused my lineart, reshaded it with red, and threw together a background that matched the other pieces in style. I also decided to pay slight tribute to my Danganronpa Amino days when I'd make "edits" of my favorite characters and subtly copied my old artstyle.

[duchessofostergotlands]

Hi! Sorry if you've already been asked this but I know Trooping of the colors is King Charles official birthday. Do other royals have official birthdays?

Hello :) I'm assuming you're asking whether there are other royals who have this kind of "fake birthday" which they celebrate publicly regardless of when their real birthday is.

So yes is the answer. The main examples that come to mind would be Luxembourg and the Netherlands. Some people might quibble about the Netherlands because Kongingsdag is celebrated, usually, on Willem Alexander's birthday which is 27th April. But that's just a total fluke. Basically the event was initially held on the monarch's actual birthday. But Beatrix was born in January so they decided to keep it on her mother's birthday, 30th April, as the weather would be nicer. It is a fluke that WA was born on 27th April so they only needed to move it a couple of days but I'd still count it with the UK and Luxembourg because they will move it if it's a Sunday and it wasn't ever on Beatrix's real birthday, nor will it likely ever be on Amalia's real birthday as she was a December baby.

There is more I could say because this feeds into things like National Days and the weirdness of the UK as a nation but 1) I'm trying to be succinct for once and 2) I don't want to sound like a Brit with main character syndrome (even though in this case it would be deserved!). So if you want more ramblings you can come back but otherwise I'll just answer what you asked!! Maybe we'll do it on the podcast if people are interested :)

[itspileofgoodthings]

Oh my goodness oh my goodness I'm always quiet about 2005 p&p because the entire world/this website seems to have decided it's the pinnacle of period pieces but OH it feels good to hear you say all the things I've always thought!! You're so right! How did Joe Wright take the bare bones of one of the best novels ever written and grind it down into this sad, cringey pastiche of Ye Olde Romance tropes. Managing to use actual Austen quotes but devoid of context or soul due to the script actively hating the complexity of the original characters. Also pig genitals IN THE HOUSE I will never forgive them.

OKAY SOMEHOW I MISS THE PIG MOMENT EVERY TIME I DON'T KNOW HOW IT MUST JUST BE MY SELF-PROTECTIVE INSTINCTS WHICH SOMETIMES KICK IN AND REFUSE TO LET ME PROCESS WHAT I'M SEEING---

ahem. No but I'm glad you've been enjoying the ride!!! It's absolutely a delicate topic and i do NOT want to be mean or insensitive or be a huge buzzkill to people who love it and enjoy it, i don't want to take that away from anyone!! (well, maybe my students but that's it) but I also love hate-watching it and unpacking it.

(that tweet that's like 'I enjoy critical analysis and being a hater')

and Yeah!!! I just think that everything you said is the root of it all for me and why I do choose to speak on it publicly every now and again really loudly and forcefully even though I don't wanna upset anyone. (and I don't. Never my intention..) It actively rejects Real Romance in favor of a blend of sentimentalism and cliches that just dumbs everything down and in the end robs the audience of the fullest enjoyment of a Real Romance that only comes when you've put in a little bit of work. And there's something so cheap and underhanded about a movie doing that because the ease of it does reel people in. In some ways, nothing I say about this film will ever sum up its flaws better than my mom watching it and being like "oh I see why people like this one, you never have to wait for anything." And it just feels so emblematic to me of soooooo much that's wrong with ..... well everything these days. The culture. The romance. The world.

Like. You have to care about characterization, the limits of reality, the ugly parts of life, money, a sense of humor. And you have to wait. You have to wrestle. You have to put up with things being not instantly gratifying or romantic. And it's hard for us not to do that!

Not putting all of those reasons on the shoulders of people who do care about this movie!! there are hundred personal reasons to care about the movie but just trying to explain why I do care so much and speak so much and feel compelled to speak OUT.

Also it is fun to, as I said, try to understand it better and actually pull it apart with a little more care and attention than just my usual surface-level rantings or the comparisons to other adaptations. Not that I've done a great job of doing all that critical thinking on tumblr, but it sets my mind in motion to think about and talk about a broad range of topics honestly and in more depth by choosing to, well, I guess the term is engage with something critically. Like. Just the experience of it has given my mind a lot to think about.

Also YEAH. it's shocking how many, many, many Austen straight-from-the-book quotes are in this movie. A lot!!!!! But the intention is so different and not, imo, in an artsy or valid way but in a way that just kind of reveals the filmmaker wishes the story was something else. and Why. WHY.

Anyway I'm rambling because I have now stayed up too late for the third night in a row!!! I need to sleep and stop.

But yeah. This is a safe space for 2005 negativity and I hope that by now my followers know to expect this from me and it's not too jarring.

[secondsonaym]

Okay, so I've had a bit of time to think on it (not that it bothered me that much, but I did want to try and clarify some things), and a sort of 'follow up' to this post in particular.

A little rambly, so under the cut.

Note that this isn't to talk about that specific anon or the specific issue involved in it, it's just a jumping off point, more or less.

I think people do need a bit of a reminder about 'parasociality' and the boundaries that tend to get ignored/eroded because of it.

To get right to the meat of the issue:

I'm ace. I have a complicated relationship with sex and sexual content. I feel bad when I have to bring up these parts of my identity when explaining these things, but I provide them to sort of give you a better perspective as to why some stuff may not be good to say to me. Why I take them a bit personally.

The long and short of it is, I'm really only comfortable with jokes and the like when either I am the one to publicly initiate, or it's happening between my own friends, in a comfortable environment.

It's why I tend to not let some stuff I tag with 'suggestive' to be reblogged, because that's just not what I want to be spread around and get people making the wrong assumptions about me.

Obviously there's nuance and yadda yadda sometimes exceptions, etc. But this is where I stand, and will not budge, because of a history of people continuously being entitled to the point they think they can disregard my requests to respect this.

So, tying this into the whole 'parasocial' aspect.

Yeah, I'm very casual and chatty, I like to be friendly to you all and I enjoy seeing your commentary and stuff, even if I don't always respond--Honestly wish there was a way to 'like' replies like on twitter, cause I usually use it as an indicator of 'I've seen this and it made me smile :>'

But. And this a big but. That is not an open invitation for you to jump straight to telling me things like "I put your OC in a smash or pass discord channel" or things of a similar nature. That's a bit too much of a boundary break.

Like, removing the context, how weird does it sound for you to tell somebody (who doesn't know who you are) that you put their character in a channel where people rate their desire to 'smash' or 'pass'? It definitely sounds weird to me, and I sure as hell wouldn't say it to somebody I barely even know.

I'm a bit skittish to begin with, so it's definitely not easy for me to loosen up and be comfortable interacting with new people, but stuff like this makes me withdraw back into my shell, so to speak.

I don't mind starting up convos, and if it seems like I'm actively engaging in the dialogue, then you have nothing to worry about, but this also isn't an invitation for Every Single Person to hit me up.

On the internet where those boundaries aren't as visibly noticeable--I can't give you body language to show my mood, for instance--It's very easy to not see that stuff, but I really think people need to take a few moments to consider if they're assuming too much about their relationship with somebody before saying something.

I've heard horror stories about even worse shit happening in the fandom, and it makes me glad y'all are so respectful as it is, which is why I'm not getting boiling mad or anything over this stuff, cause I'm sure you'll listen and understand.

And as far as that specific scenario linked goes: I don't care what y'all discuss about my OCs or my stuff between friends/in private spaces and all that. Out of sight, out of mind. You don't need to tell me, and I'm not gonna Thought Crime you.

The issue I'm taking is with the assumption of things, to the point I do need to go on these several-paragraph rambles, when stuff like that I feel should be basic etiquette.

I love y'all and I am happy people enjoy my things, but please let me stress that as far as interaction with y'all goes, I'm really not that much different from a streamer or something. I'm just a person doing a thing, and people like that thing.

Sorry this got a little long-winded, but I hope I at least made my point, and I'll stress again I'm not mad or anything. It's just been on my mind, so I might as well talk about it.

[picklesttrpg]

(temporary) Introduction!! to PICKLE'S WORLD

Hello!!! I'm Pickle! (Or rather, The Pickle God)

And I really want to develop my own world and make a TTRPG out of it! With an entire system and all!

Hence I'm the literal god of pickles, I won't waste time with labels and stuff like that, I am a pickle. And I ramble a lot, sadly

Ngl I'm really new to tumblr, so like hang in there with me please! I'm learning as I go, like I discovered formatting text just a few days ago.

What Pickle actually wants

I have a world with characters, worldbuilding, all the juicy stuff including unecessary details. I have an entire web of morons, historical events and everything, and am working on many stories that happen all throughout it (Writing one as a personal thing, and I was publishing a webcomic over another one, tho thanks to irl stuff it's on hiatus rn)

I'm actually horrible with names, and even tho I've worked on the world for 6-7 years by now, I still don't have a name for it (please help). As most creators, I wanted to share it with the world, to get feedback and improve on it! Offer my silly little concept and pickles for everyone to see. But besides that I have one more dream.

My world is in one big busy city. Filled to the brim with wonky characters, all fighting for being more and more important than the other. (and really, individuality is rewarded whilst people who are passive and grey usually end up at the edge of the society) Everything from biker grandmas living out their wildest final years, aspiring children supervillains to singing popstar priests, worshipping an entity which lives in the stars. This is reaching lore territory, but in this world, everyone has to strive to be the best and most exciting version of themselves, otherwise their past might catch up to them.

I wanted my world to be a place for other *real* people to thrive in. To create a character (or multiple!), who can go do what they truly want (and suffer in the process) I think it's just so incredibly cool when other people make characters for your own world, where you can think about them interacting with everyone, participating in the events, and having an entirely new story to share!

I essentially wish my world could once be a place for others to create ocs for and roleplay in. (now there is more to it, obviously, but like how cool is that! someone 'moving into' your world and story!)

Why TTRPG then?

Now, I work on the world and stories all the time, but I've never had them in any publicly shareable versions. Additionally, I didn't know if people online would actually ever care. But that's the sweet benefit of tumblr blogs, from what I noticed. It can be a little unnoticed blog and it's just vibing and doing its own thing!

I have friends who are reaaaaaalllly into DnD and few other games like that. I've played with them, and know even some DMs!

Now, isn't dnd great? You make your own character, explore a new cool world with possible friends, do some cool (or mostly unhinged) stuff and literally immerse yourself int everything! Really, a roleplaying game like that seems a great fit for anyone who wants people to explore their worldbuilding and writing!

But personally, conventional dnd isn't for me, and the systems are quite complicated. And as fun and intricate as they are, I also know many begginers, who may get scared away or confused. I found Call of Cthulhu much more enjoyable! Including the system in it, it's been fun, especially the sanity mechanic, and also how it offered different type of challenge and roleplaying purpuose from dnd!

Additionally, I could never imagine adapting all the mechanics into my world, seeing as my own lore offers different playstyles and opportunities. (Like I can't even use the races and classes)

So, I've decided, with a help of few friends, to try and create a new-ish system, specifically built with my world in mind!

The goal is to be simple and begginer-friendly, to shorten the learning curve, but also give more space to people who want to roleplay and develop their characters.

One of the main 'concepts is' "If shit goes down, do whatever you can."

Conflicts can be resolved in any way, from fighting, reasoning to seduction, bribery, or even just a well timed kick to the nuts, poke someone's eye out with a paper. And I wanted a system simple enough to spare us most of the math and formalities, and one which would work the 'same' way regardless of the player's actions,

I want to focus on characters, city/environment exploration and putting players as protags into stories, which are more than "slay the dragon, save the village, rock on brother"...mostly cause my world would crumble under any actual adventurers.

These are just wonky people with minimum wage jobs, physical trauma and debt, living life in a world where everyone is forced to be the protag sometimes.

The entire system is in EARLY BABY STAGES! but I want to share it, and both report on how the testing in practice goes, but also possibly get some input and advice from you, *the internet people*, to make it the best it can be? This is a huge learning experience for me, and honestly, I'd just love to take you on the adventure with me.

So, are you interested in lots of worldbuilding and lore-heavy characters? Or would you like to help with creating a TTRPG?

If so, please join me on my adventure!

Aid The Pickle God!

oh and dw, i don't think i have the capability/skills nor desire to make this system/game thing monetizable. I do not ask for any money, but please, don't claim any of my characters or stories as your own. They're very personal and important to me. I want this system to encourage more people to try roleplaying like this, and promote character creation (alongside developing my own ocs), so especially the system, feel free to use it, and let me know how it went! would love suggestions and help with it, to make it the best it can be! And I want to offer my world too, but for now, I think it's still a bit too early for that. Please get inspired and make your own worlds and stories fun and wonky! But again, don't claim my work please :)

And now, Pickle out!

Worship and devour me, mortals!

[philcoulsonismyhero]

I'm having a weird brain week because the old family shit has been stirred up, so I guess I'm rambling about it on here.

So (bear with me) I reinstalled my old LEGO HP games because I was getting bored of the superhero ones I've been playing and LEGO games are pretty much the only video games I can ever be bothered with, and hoo boy. (And I don't even mean the whole issue of 'the creator of this thing I still can't help but care about hates people like me now', I can mostly deal with that these days by just not putting any money anywhere near her direction and not engaging publicly with her work.)

Sometimes there's that one fictional character that was really important to you when a bunch of shit was going down in your life and so they end up intrinsically linked to that shit in your brain, and for me that's Lupin. Every time I go back to HP, I end up going back to obsessing over that guy, and more often than not it dredges up everything that I used him as a coping mechanism for. And this time it very much has.

Long story short-ish, I was 15 when my parents sat me and my sisters down and told us they were getting divorced. It was November, and that was the year that I was sitting my Highers, which at that point were the exams that your uni application would depend on the results of, i.e. the exams that at a private school obsessed with academic results you end up believing are going to determine the rest of your life. I was doing six, you're usually supposed to do a maximum of five, so I had no free periods and a reputation as Probably The Smartest Kid In My Year to uphold. So my parents told me they were getting divorced and I dealt with that by just putting my head down and Getting On With Things, because school was the thing I was good at, and had to be good at. (I got straight As, three subject prizes and Dux of School that year. Fuck you, circumstances.)

To be completely honest, despite the myriad of new stresses it caused, the divorce was kind of a relief because it had been inevitable. I have a very distinct memory of being quite a bit younger that 15 and standing in the kitchen by the doors through to the dining room and listening to my parents shouting at each other in there, and turning to my younger sisters and saying "This is going to end up in divorce." I can only remember a fraction of what went down in the years that led up to it, and not even half the reasons for them splitting up, but there was a lot of shouting when I was a young teen/pre-teen. I spent a couple of years being the shoulder that my mum cried on, and the person that my dad complained to about my mum, and I was about 13 and knew fuck-all about anything except for the fact that someone had to be the sensible one around here and try and mediate a bit. I was the oldest, the younger two shouldn't have to deal with All That, and the last thing we needed was anything or anyone introducing More Drama into the situation. I got bullied at school and I don't think I ever mentioned it to my parents. I do remember emailing one of those support services about the bullying, though, which I have to remind myself every time I think back and I'm like 'but it wasn't That Bad, was it?' I got deliberately tripped on the stairs once. Fortunately both of those assholes grew out of it in a year or two, and I finally stopped being in classes with one of them, although I never managed to get rid of the other guy. Trounced him in the final year physics exam, though, and boy did that feel good after years of "girls can't do physics".

Anyway. Being fifteen sucked, but I was good at school. And I was Sensible, and I didn't get into any of that Teen Drama that fiction and society both seemed convinced was inevitable, I did well in my exams, I didn't make a fuss about anything, I kept my head down and Got On With Things, and then two years into uni I crashed and burned dramatically because turns out I'm autistic and don't deal very well with new situations and never learned how to ask for help *jazz hands*

All this to say, 15 year old me took one look at Remus Lupin, designated Sensible Adult In The Room who was always the one helping other people and being Understanding and never complaining too much about his own situation despite everything always seeming to collapse around him and went ah. That one. That character would Understand. Plus, he was an adult who treated the teenagers with respect while also always being clearly aware that they were still kids and there were some things that they shouldn't have to deal with, and. I had emotions about that. I was never hugely interested in the fandom version of the guy as a teenager, I never got particularly invested in stories about teenagers because I never felt like one myself, but the adult version? He was the crutch that got me through Being Fifteen.

And now I'm 27 and most of the time I'm Fine but every so often (often in November, but not always) this stuff comes back to bite me and I look at all the characters that I care about the most and they're folks like Obi-Wan or Lupin or Hotch or Ironwood, people who are stuck being Sensible or In Charge or both and sometimes end up cracking under the weight of it all and it's like. Yeah. Yeah, I guess all that did fuck me up. And at least now I'm engaging more with characters who get to be angry about their situations. I'm still really bad about being angry about things, it's an emotion I really struggle to express because I associate it so much with a whole lot of shouting that just makes a mess and takes forever to actually achieve anything. I think I'm angry about a lot of things, but part of me is always like 'yeah, but what's The Point, it's not like getting angry now will change anything that happened'. So I just don't. I stall out before I get anywhere. But the characters that I write, both in fic and my own original stuff, are starting to get to Lose Their Shit. I'm getting a little better at secondhand catharsis. It's a baby step, but it's something.

I don't think I'm going to write any of it because engaging to that degree with HP isn't something I want to do anymore, but I could write so much fanfic where Lupin gets to actually get mad about his situation. Where he gets to shout about all the shit he's been put through, all the friends he's lost and all the prejudice and injustice he's faced and how he's tired of being the calm and sensible one who helps everyone else and never gets any acknowledgement from those people about his own struggles. Some of it would be projecting, some of it would be just having an outside perspective on the story that he's in and the way it treated him and how it was bullshit and how that makes me mad because he Deserved Better. How his story ended up being about his own insecurities and how he should just get over them rather than the colossal injustice he'd faced his entire life and the fact that he shouldn't have to be just resigned to it, he should be allowed to get angry and to try and do something about it.

I don't think I'm going to write it, but thinking about it has helped a bit, even though thinking about Lupin was what landed me in the Brain Weird place in the first place. Sometimes you've just got to get angry on behalf of a fictional character because that way you can sidle up to getting angry on your own behalf. Try it out a bit. I don't know. I don't know if any of this is productive or just an exercise in being maudlin, but I guess I'm having the yearly breakdown about Family Shit a bit early this year and it probably doesn't hurt to dust off an old coping mechanism and see if it helps at all.

And at least this time I've gotten another original fiction idea out of it, so I guess that's something. I'll probably talk about that a bit soon, it's a fun one, and I'm slowly working out how to properly use it to get into the fact that to me werewolves are almost always a metaphor for repressed anger and being scared of the mess that you'll make if you let it out. They're a lot of things to a lot of people, but to me, thanks to Lupin and all the personal shit from my life that he got tangled up in, they're that.

And speaking of dealing with repressed anger, I should probably go and rewatch the scene from the penultimate Ted Lasso episode that absolutely wrecked me, which was the one where Ted finally has a proper go at his mum. Because I felt that one in my bones, although in my case it's my dad that I could do with repeatedly saying 'fuck you' to. Blargh. That was definitely the thing that primed me for the descent into Lupin nonsense, that's for sure. Fiction, man. It'll do things to you.

It's nearly 6 in the morning and I should probably attempt sleep, I guess. Thanks for reading if you got this far, this was just a brain dump because sometimes you just need to Put The Thing In Words, whether it's coherent or not, and throw it out into the void.

[theinfernalcalypso]

In response to this ask, list 5 songs you enjoy listening to, post them publicly ! And send this ask to the last 10 people in your notifs (if you want).

You would make me choose like this. You would make me choose in such a broad category-

I'm jk lemme give u a list in SMALLER categories based on hyperspecific emotions I've experienced lately!

Entropy - Arrows in Action

This is for the fact I have... felt very stuck. I have several things I want to do, but they're all dependent on other factors that have to come to fruition first that I have no control over. Whether I should give up and do something more instantly gratifying specifically. It also evokes my feeling I've experienced lately regarding DC if anyone remembers that post.

2. Somewhere Only We Know - Keane

This is... somewhat related to the above. I don't know if it's the feeling of foreshortened future brought on by the trauma, or the perspective I have regarding how humans don't live very long at all really, or that it feels like the world is headed for an end soon. But, I do know I just wanna curl up somewhere with the people I love and just enjoy it. I feel far older than my body would tell you (even my joints who insist I'm 60), and I certainly feel like things are far more limited as far as time. I just wanna spend it with the people and the things I do that make me happy. I don't wanna live in capitalistic need like we've been forced to (at least within the states).

3. Seventeen - The Heathers The Musical Soundtrack

Oh, god, where do I start here? There's a few factors this one was brought back to me lately, getting back together with my highschool sweetheart (Bunny) being one of them. (I guess if anyone wants that story? Ask??) It's for mourning a youth lost, where I was parentified and made my mother's therapist. It's for being so anxious about ever being in trouble and mourning every missed opportunity to sneak out and live for a change. It's for the fact I was 19 when I met my abusive ex and went from the frying pan (my mother) into the fire when I moved in with him (13 hours away from any family in either VA or SC) and didn't realize what I'd gotten myself into. I want it all back but I know it's far too late for that.

4. Goddess - Cephied ft. Nonon

Since I moved back home (well, one of two places I could consider as such on a people basis), I've... kinda been lacking in my craft because of everything I've had to get settled even months later (like I voted!! I've never had the opportunity to do that before and I had to get my ID sorted for that shit!!). A lot of the time, meditating (one of my most frequent forms of not just decompressing but also for "tuning in" really) for me looks like bedrotting. I put my headphones on, I curl up in bed (usually in the dark), and I maladaptive daydream. Yes, sounds unconventional. But it's how I've adapted my practice to my capabilities. But also I mean, my daydreams in this fashion sometimes go off the rails from what I want them to be and I feel like I've managed to adapt it into a form of oneiromancy (for those who may be confused by the term: divination through dreams!). This is probably my most often used form of it for digging up memories of past lives I have, others being tarot, the conventional form of oneiromancy, and more broadly (to give me a starting point) using a pendulum for those I feel like would be a good source to ask. I have yet to actually put my bones for osteomancy (aka bone throws) to use. (... I degreased exactly seven bones that I saved from a plate of ribs from the outback.) ... this ended up being very much a ramble about my magic practice oopsie.

5. Over It - Arrows In Action

Alright. Alright. I know. I already put Arrows In Action on this list. But also the entire album Built to Last on top of their new song Cheekbones have been obsessions lately. I blame the fact I've been hyperfocused on Vampire the Masquerade lately and my character in the solo chronicle Bunny's running for me is literally just me if I was a vampire and that the album + Cheekbones is just applicable to in and out of game stuff lately. (Seriously, go listen to at least the stuff listed individually listed here if nothing else. Their music FUCKS-) But also, specifically, this brings me to where I recently mentioned to Bunny and Puppy that there's a few different mindsets I vacillate between. I'll just paste the text for the two relevant ones. "I am a teenager/young adult who feels utterly shattered by the burdens life has placed on me. I contemplate whether it's worth it to try and keep going. My clothes smell like nicotine and I crave the release of alcohol to make things feel a little lighter." "I am an ageless being that predates man. I have seen them rise, fall, and get back up again to repeat the process for millennia. I have such disdain for some aspects, even individuals, but then I also have an overwhelming love for them."

[goldenfox3]

3, 8 - Thousand Five, 12

Fandom Ask Game! (accepting)

Answering this one in reverse order so I can put the last one under a cut for politeness' sake lmao

12. What's the funniest or craziest AU idea you've ever come up with?

Hm I don't know if I'd call it far out I think I'm rather tame when it comes to AUs thus far...my instinct is to say the Glamour and Gold universe since it goes all high fantasy with guilds and quests and Robert being turned into a literal kitsune with Saint Seiya-esque rules on people seeing his true form (kill/kill the memories of or marry) that I still have to hash out. There was some vague mystery surrounding Kevin Stewart's death that Falcon and Rob were gonna eventually sleuth out but really I just created this AU to indulge my love of fantasy/RPG elements and because I love literal fluffy fox Stewart being married to Falcon lmao. McCloud is of course also a kitsune.

The Don't Fear the Reaper verse with Shinigami Jack is maybe...? far out because it's a drastic departure from his canon status in the anime and explores what he would've been like if he'd never left the street thug life...except I never wrote it and probably never will. The tome-spanning epic of Ryu extremely slowly working his way into Jack's heart with his stubborn rashness and earnest sincerity and the slowburning enemies to lovers arc between them will remain a mere imagination 😔✌

8. How did you come up with the title to Thousand Five?

A long time ago when I still actually had the mental fortitude to look on FFN for fics and FFN hadn't done the great M-rated yeetening, I came across an explicit Falcon/Snake fic where Snake was on Falcon's lap in the Blue Falcon and Falcon was toying with him if you know what I mean. Snake was sitting on something alright. And the Blue Falcon was going around and around the practice laps with Falcon periodically reciting the speed at which they were going because one or both of them got off on the danger of it. Or perhaps the thrill in leaving them both in Falcon's hands as he does one of the things he loves the most alongside [redacted] with Snake.

I cannot find that fic anymore so I believe it has been a victim of the purges (tm) but as much as I could not stop going "blease guys you are gonna kill yourselves" the calm way Falcon kept reciting the numbers stuck with me. I don't know if he actually said "thousand five" as one of the speeds. I'm half-sure he said thousand something at least because that's just how insanely fast these machines go. But I picked Thousand Five because it sounded cool and fast and large but with the possibility of growing larger, influenced by the vague memory of this fic. It just happened to be a happy accident that, just as this verse is my "main" verse for Falcon/Stewart, "A Thousand Fiery Stars" is my "main" verse for anime Falcon/Stewart with both having thousand in the name.

3. NoTP?

I anxiety ramble too much under the cut: extended edition

Let me preface this with the usual disclaimer that these are only my personal preferences, I'm not meaning to be an elitist or a gatekeeper or a hater, I think everyone should be free and ship whatever makes you happy forever, etc. (I know it may be obvious but like. I'm unreasonably anxious about answering this one publicly which is why it took me so long to answer lol)

Now. Falcon (both mainverse and anime) are the most popular characters in the series and as such have the most variety in ships. Or at least main Falcon does. Unfortunately for me I am the MOST picky for the Falcons specifically about what ships I like/dislike seeing him in even if it seems like I toss them in randomass ships all the time LMAO. For game Falcon I'm a bit more relaxed about it because his characterization is a bit more open and shifts more in my head depending on the circumstances, but with Andy I am extremely picky about characterization and relationship dynamics in my head because I've grown so attached to my own interpretation of his identity, motivations, and romantic orientation/sexuality. I love game Falcon but I became attached to animeverse and Andy first, so he is my special darling baby boy (as he is to many people).

In terms of either Falcon, I don't like Falcon/Olimar (sorry falimar pals). I just dislike the way Falcon is portrayed in their meeting scene in Subspace and I'm not too into Smash ships for Falcon in general. Mainverse Falcon/women in general I'm also not very into unless it's FalSam or like, we are transing Stewart's gender up in here because Falcon/Stewart is my OTP regardless of their genders lmao.

For Andy...I have the same thing about only really shipping him with men unless it's like. Transing Robert's gender again. I wouldn't say Falcon/Stewart is my ONLY ship for both game/anime versions of them but it is certainly my main ship for both. The ship I fall back to as "default" when I'm not entertaining the thought exercise of another ship for either Falcon or either Stewart. I have a lot of thoughts about Andy's relationship with romance and sexuality and I can see him being demi or aroace. Or poly because his heart is too big to love and devote himself to just one person. The whole multiple identities thing really adds a layer of danger, separation, showing facets of himself and I feel like there are few people he lets close enough to see his whole, vulnerable self beneath.

Coupled with the demi hc, I really prefer shipping him with characters he is already shown to work with and be close to, because I feel that he would never willingly start a romance with someone not already involved in his work as Falcon because of his sense of duty, the danger, or simply because he's just not interested in that sort of thing, and would kindly but firmly rebuff any advances. He kept his own sister out of the loop so she wouldn't be exposed to the danger of being connected to Falcon for crying out loud (kicks him). But if the person is already involved in his line of work and already had an established bond in the show with him, well...free real estate. So basically. Rob, Roy, Ryu (why do all these characters' names start with R??) are fair game for shipping with him in my mind.

I know I started out my F-Zero fic career with Bart/Ryu because of someone else's influence and it still holds a special place in my heart but in general I also prefer shipping Andy with people older than him (Rob, Roy?? we don't know Andy's age really besides "nice middle" lmao). I know this all sounds like me making up reasons why Andy/Rob is the OTP of all time and I swear it isn't JUST that. I like thinking about Andy getting taken care of. I like thinking about a man who is constantly caring for and protecting others getting to rest and be taken care of for a little while. I like the idea of him being able to lean on a presence he's known and trusted for so long that he knows they're a steady anchor who won't begrudge him for not being the perfect paragon. I know this doesn't necessarily have to be someone older but it just adds to the whole dynamic I feel.

All this was a very longwinded way of saying I'm very controlling when it comes to Andy ships in particular which I know directly contradicts what I said about his heart being big enough to love many LMAO sorry Andy 😔 It took me a long time to even think of him as...someone shippable to begin with so I like having full control over the interpretation and chewing on how it would work out a lot when I think about him in romantic relationships. He's a very special character to me (despite my blog being plastered with Stewart) and many others so—again—reiterating that these are only my personal preferences with no bearing on my wish for others do as they please with him and think of this fictional man in whatever scenarios bring you joy.

[juvederm]

is it tough for anyone else to really rank the ud characters like??? let me ramble for a second

separating player base and fandom. i know the players have very BASIC rankings. ie, mike is usually #1, and emily is lowest. like that's a let's players ranking of the characters. i think it's very shallow and boring but. they're like a player. not really a fandom person.

with that out of the way, i don't understand the fandom's rankings of the characters. because for me personally, i like all of them. for every bad thing i have to say about them, i have a positive thing to say. for every action of theirs i criticize, i can also defend them. so i can't really rank them based on bad shit they do

in my eyes, i don't understand hating ashley but liking josh. that doesn't compute to me. or hating jess but liking emily, vice versa. because they're all equally shitty or can do horrible things. and before you say sam, she can like kill everyone in the lodge fire. so yeah. (but a post about sam's character is another post for another late night)

i find every ranking of the characters really boring. like every tier list, every numbered list or anything like that is usually just predictable. you know either emily, jess or ashley is gonna be at the bottom (which is a shame bc those three are in my personal top 4) and you know chris is gonna be high, mike or matt is either high or middle, sam is usually high and josh is high sometimes as well. or really low. it's kind of a toss up.

there's a lot to be said about the low rankings of the female ud characters. i think it's boring when someone ranks emily low, to me that's just bad taste. and like sheep behavior in a way. the game wants you to hate her so... you hate her. that's something the playerbase does, except for maybe a few let's players who enjoyed emily. but majority of them dislike her because she was like. written to be disliked.

not entirely though? she has her redeemable moments but even then people still hate her. like being mean is a death sentence for emily and i find that strange. because the people who say that about her, in the same breath, like michael, who quite literally harassed a girl in the prologue (and emily, jess, ash and matt were also participants so this is what i mean by they're all equally shitty in their own ways)

so that's why i personally can't rank them because... they're all equal in my eyes. and yeah i have 4 that i geek about, and josh is one that i publicly geek about (i know nobody is gonna believe my top 4 but it's: emily, josh, jess and ashley) but i love all them like on the same level. like i have so much to say about all of them. except josh is like. the one i have been thinking of making content for like stories and art, etc, so that's why he dominates a lot of my ud posts bc he's just in my headspace

and also. once you stop thinking about the morality of the characters, ranking them doesn't fucking matter!!!! because they're all put into this horrible situation but not necessarily horrible people. like there's sympathetic moments that i feel like are just glossed over for the sake of saying you dislike them.

this happens for ashley. she's a sweet girl, she's kinda just silly when it comes to humor, and she's jumpy and not a fan of scary things. but god forbid she freaks out and suddenly she's a whiny bitch who's useless compared to chris (that's just misogyny not even gonna hold you) and she does horrible things that people ALSO hold above her head and then forget how she STARTED at the beginning of the game.

i've already said how i feel about the whole "ashley killing chris" thing. you should know that that is an out of character choice for chris who spent the entire basement sequence saying "ashley i won't let you die" only to shoot her? is that not an OOC choice for him? ofc you're gonna get punished for doing that. the game straight up tells you in a TIP: sometimes doing nothing is the best thing to do. which is something you can do in those trigger control-like options.

hell, even josh is like: "mike knows how to treat a lady. hint: it's not to shoot her in the face!" to chris if he shoots ashley (also kinda foreshadowing ? to mike potentially shooting emily) so like. it's not even ashley's fault that YOU chose an out of character option for chris and got punished.

and to conclude this, yes she can kill him but DID U KNOW??? she can also open the door and Save him ??? she doesn't Just kill him no matter what you do. that's absurd.

anyways. i got carried away. in conclusion, ranking the characters in fandom is pretty much useless. i'll end it off with this

you either like all of them or hate all of them.