#i don't think that these results are accurate I think i messed up somewhere

[purplexiasphinx]

was scrolling through alternate fandoms and i am going to kill myself thanks

this quiz sorts through characters from like dozens of fandoms and finds the one you’re most like. I’m not even a little bit surprised by my result

[doberbutts]

Thanks for sharing your story, its so great to hear how well hormones helped you! (Although sorry about how long it took, and the difficulty with top surgery) Im wondering, how does one even ask to see an endocrinologist? Im trying to get my messed up symptoms diagnosed, so i asked if i could get my hormones checked out. But they basically said "no, people only see endos for diabetes and getting pregnant." I know thats bs, so if you know of any magic words or referrals i could try, id appreciate it, thank you

You may want to consider pursuing a second opinion, or finding a doctor willing to dig deeper. People see endocrinologists for all sorts of things, not just pregnancy or diabetes. Any sort of hormonal concern is enough for an endo referral and I'm sorry your doctor is being annoying about it. Your hormones do a lot of the heavy lifting in your body chemically-speaking, and if you have an imbalance anywhere it's usually findable via a blood test that your endo could order. Your regular doctor could order it too, but I'm feeling somewhat doubtful yours will considering the pushback already, and I also feel somewhat doubtful that truthful and accurate doctor interpretation of results would happen with this particular person.

With me it was a bit easier to find a doctor willing to play ball because I have extensive medical history and also you could look at me and see that there had to be an imbalance somewhere because I already had a (fairly sparse) beard and thick body hair and Adam's apple without being on T at all.

If you experience any sort of trouble with your internal or external genitalia, you may be able to get a obgyn (if you have the parts for it) to write the referral if your pcp isn't willing to do so. And if you are an individual who has a penis, I've hears that most doctors are pretty willing to try and figure out penis and testicle problems so you can always try that angle. You may also have to insist, "I know you don't feel an endo is necessary, but for my peace of mind I think I should see one" or something like that.

[general-radix]

It's "Amigurumi Maintenance Time" again! No, I don't have anything better to do right now.

This started with me wanting to re-stuff Dante somehow; stuffing does settle over time, but he'd gotten way too squishy and fragile-feeling compared even to my other early projects (possibly because the stuffing itself was already pretty old). Somehow, it snowballed into a whole lot more work:

In order to re-stuff him, I temporarily opened up a weak spot in his neck stitching; then I extended Dante's hood to try and cover up more of that (which I probably should've redone entirely, but I don't feel like messing with it right now). He also got those two bands on his belt, and another piece of hair to cover up the gap between his hair cap and face.

Vince and Enzo both needed a re-stuff, too. You might've noticed that Vince is looking forward-ish now; I finally decided to correct both his severely offset head and below-subpar neck stitching in one shot. (He's not looking dead-forward, but that works for him.) It's not visible, but I also extended the bottom of his hair cap and added his bottom-most hair spikes, using the same technique for Teresa's cowlick-things.

This is where I was gonna stop... until I managed to undo Enzo's (also shamefully messy) neck stitching without scissors. One separation-and-rejoining later, she has the same pupils as everyone else, an extra row of jacket to hide her neck better, and an actual waistband on her jeans. Plus an extended hair cap, because I was making them too short and thin at first.

At this point, I should've hit the sack--but no, I just had to buff up Jess first. Sewed some of her existing hair in place to try and get the shapes more accurate (and now you can actually see that she has eyelashes), then made an entire second layer of hair, followed by touching up one eye. I think that, aside from maybe one day getting her sunglasses, Jess looks a lot more like herself now.

Somewhere during this time, Thema got a very minor adjustment to one eye (same as Jess's) to make her face more symmetrical.

Final results: the main trio all feel much sturdier and I can stop kicking myself over not thinking of the layer trick when I was making Jess. (If you're wondering: not counting Pavo, Angelus is the only one who didn't need any work.)

...and because I did all of this after an entire day working on two new projects at once--long story--I must take a break, lest my elbows and wrists incite an uprising against the rest of me.

[the-conscious]

Anyone there: I'm so sorry I used to be there nobody respected it or me and it's gotten so so so much worse as a result I know it's hard it's so hard but please learn to respect yourself if no one else will. If faint is risk, may need mobility aid; best time to get a cane is LONG BEFORE you can't walk without one. It's when it just makes you less exhausted, it's when it helps with pain that's tolerable but shouldn't be there in the first place. You can engage in relevant management for disorders you think you might have if you think they'd be helpful without a diagnosis; this medical system is set up to not give a shit until we're REALLY messed up.

The child that complained of joint pain shouldn't be brushed off as having "growing pains" when it's preventing him from living his life when he very well may have had arthritis since he was young that will continue to be ignored until he's an adult and have to argue that Yes he Does need a wheelchair because otherwise he can't leave his house despite the doctor literally prescribing obscenely heavy medicine,

And the child who suspects BPD or any other disorder relatable (cause and affect—neurological issues tend to not manifest in solitude hence relevance) but "doesn't have it yet" needed treatment to prevent it from setting in, needed assistance in dealing with the situations that cause the risk NOT people to call them a stupid self-diagnoser and that that's impossible that young,

Just as the kid nearly passing out from pain and exhaustion climbing the stairs should not have been made to feel like he has to ration his inhaler because he's not SUFFOCATING exactly, all of it

And these children, and children like them, oft grow up to become still-neglected adults, even more incapable of receiving help for the world only seems to become less forgiving to what you don't know or don't have or didn't experience the older you get rather than opening a door for us

It's a cruel cruel set-up; your health and you are worth everything. Preserve it best you can. I know it's hard, I was there, it'll get better soon because people are fighting to change things.

To make a medical system that makes sense, that actually functions, that doesn't tank our lives because they failed to identify a fucking dislocated shoulder and fix it and tried to suggest surgery instead of realising that if they had actually fucking checked to see the shoulder they'd know they could've fixed it with their hands on the spot.

To pilot society in such a way it doesn't fucking hurt people this way anymore, not leaving it in the hands of grossly incompetent leaders that not only let it happen but encourage it.

You are deserving of a higher quality of life than you've been made to feel you do; you deserve no pain, you deserve lungs that are easy to breathe in and legs that are easy to move and if you can't have these things you deserve whatever your most comfortable state of being is, you deserve caring minds that can guide you to understanding how to live your own way rather than making you feel inadequate for daring to so much as be sick and disabled "wrong".

I believe you, I hear you, and I'm far from alone in that. It will get better because we'll make it so one step at a time. Better won't always look how we think it will; we often can't even begin to imagine it accurately from a point of misery. It's a journey and it's exhausting but together it's easier. I know this won't fix anything in an instant, no words could. You'll still be dealing with it all, contending with the barrage of disbelief and the subsequent battle with hopelessness.

But beginning to respect yourself begins somewhere and it begins by being shown tangible self-respect; by listening to people who've been through it, by being given the tools to imagine a way that your life can improve in a realistic way that doesn't just demand you become abled the way they keep trying to force or more disabled or a miracle to happen.

I can't give all that rn my brains tired I'm far from home-free (i got much much much more disabled, did not get respect until very recently and it's still remains unwhole) I can't open the door fully but I can tell you it exists.

This rings true in so many ways

[6okuto]

HNGNNGNH ANGST HOURS would u be willing to do hcs for Felix kinda having some toxic relationship behaviors that remained from his relationship w Rime or maybe like abandonment issues hhhh im so sorry im so sorr

warnings: abandonment issues / trauma responses u guys.....what if i wanted 2 be happy..../lh i don't know if these r toxic more than unhealthy/results of grieving . and i don't think too hard on whether these are canonically accurate because i'd be Sad but i did try to make it realistic to what Could Be/Have Been,, if u will. ngfdnh sorry felix

personally. i think their relationship was good and that felix is healing but i'm going to pretend i don't matter and that i'm wrong and focus on every possible effect not touched on enough

like i don't even need to confirm their relationship problems. having your boyfriend die in your arms is trauma enough i think. But

felix gets (over)protective during any battles because he can't stand the thought of mc getting injured. it gets a little too much sometimes and he has to be reminded that they aren't incapable

sometimes mc teases felix about his little magic mess-ups and he gets very defensive without meaning to

felix feeling the need to prove himself after being with the captain of the starsworn, someone stronger than him, capable of leading

the same felix, though feeling guilty about it, feeling a sense of ? accomplishment? when mc messes up themself before he offers to help

felix finding himself compare mc to rime, with their habits and personality, how they took the astrolabe

he forgets and gets confused as to why mc can't seem to use the relic the same way rime did sometimes

it eats him up because he realizes what he's thinking, but he really does want to help and watch them succeed so he tries his best to shut that part of him off

felix deciding to spend time away from mc so he can stop the guilt he feels whenever it happens

if mc declines his offer of joining them somewhere he gets worried about them being upset or wanting to leave him

when they're alone again felix asks if everything is alright between them or if they have any problems. when mc reassures him he feels relieved but the fear in the back of his head never quite goes away

sometimes he catastrophizes when mc sounds tired or frustrated even when he knows it's not about him and his anxiety spikes and he gets a stomachache or start shaking

felix offering to do things or buying and making things for them, giving more and more while neglecting himself

felix stopping his hobbies and looking away from all of his taxidermy and collections, feeling worse and worse

he catches mc spending time with sage or anisa and laughing at something they've said and his heart wrenches and he hates feeling that way

maybe at the worst moments, when he's happiest, felix remembers mc is from an entirely different world. where they must be loved with their own lives and relationships. he wonders about what they miss, if they'd be happier there, if their time with him was always going to be temporary. he's scared.

he'd support them if they wanted to leave, he wants them to be happy. but at the same time the thought of what would happen if they did and what he'd be left to do makes him feel sick

him trying harder and harder to work on himself so that mc doesn't leave and so he can finally be better all while promising to help them get home, where he'll be alone again

so he tries to detach and keep his distance if only to make their departure less painful even if all he wants is their comfort

[unknown-drug]

🦋 25 things I wish I knew.. 🦋

1. Doing the same exercises over and over again will not help you lose weight. Switch it up, do cardio even if it sucks and no, weight lifting is not gonna make you look bulky. Lean muscle bruns more cals so think about it. It's better to have them than not.

2. If you are to diving in EDs don't do it for someone other than you. Be completely aware of the long term consequences. Do some research. And honestly, they are not worth the hassle.

3. Food is not an enemy. The day it becomes your alie only then will you really reach the ultimate peace of mind conserning food. You have to work with it not against it.

4. Not all diet will work on you. Don't  get discouraged. Try a few and see what's work. Keep in mind to incorporate a little bit of every food group to make sure you won't lack any crucial nutrients. Again do your research.

5. Do not beat yourself too hard if you slip up. It might get you to binge 10x harder too. Nobody is perfect. We all binge once in a while. And it is acutally good when you hit plateaus and stuff.

6. Reaching my GW or even my UGW didn't made me as happy as I first thought. Yes, I was somewhat glad to reach it but I was still not happy with the results..

7. Weighting yourself every single day is not effective because of the water weight an all.. the scale can shift up to 5 lbs a day. I usually do it once or twice max a week. Always on the same day. So you can see a more accurate graph.

8. No one as the same body as you. Your number compare to others might not look the same. So yes your thinspo is all cute but have you considered all the criterias ?? Keep your mind open.

9. Having something to eat in the morning (even if it is your only meal) will helps you kick start your metabolism for the day.

10. Sleep is mandatory. Don't think that staying awake all night doing exercises is helping you. In fact, your metabolism will go down 10 to 20 % if you sleep less than 6h a night. Get the rest you will need it.

11. Liquid cal and solid one are not registered by your body the same way.

12. There is no magical pill, no tea bullshit and no fucking food miracle to lose weight. But if you do take meds like  laxative or diuretic and diet pill of anykind, you have to switch it every so often. Your body will get use to them so they will feel like there aren't working. Do not take more then the recommended amount. I personally never like those because of how harmful they are to you. Be extremely careful if you are using them and please if you see anything out of the ordinary talk to professionals. It can really mess you up in the long run.

13. Stay hydrated. Your body will give up faster if you don't drink enough water compare to food. If you are fasting or anything, this shit is mandatory. And no, coffee and teas should not count in your water intakes. It is so important for weight loss.

14. Fiber. Fiber. Fiber. They are your biggest allies. Keeps you fuller longer and is the best to avoid the need of extra meds.

15. Those who will notice won't be the one you want. And those who are really there for you are not always the one you thought would be.. But do not throw away the help if you need it.

16. Do your own research on your ED. There is so much false information passed along the community you did be surprise. Do not believe everything you find either.

17. If you ever relapse after more than a year of recovery you have to keep in mind that your body has change. Especially if it went through puberty or if it is somewhere in your adulthood. If you plan on using the same old tricks you did as a teenager, I am sorry to announce you that it might not work. Your relapse is like a whole new ed. You have to relearn everything about your body. It has ajusted to your harsh treatment and will definitely not cooperate the way it did before. So keep that in mind.

18. EDs dont have numbers. Someone who is 200+ pounds is as valid as someone who is 100 and under. Stop bullying people cause they are heavier or lighter than you are. We are all in the shit anyways...

19. Take your fucking vitamins. I can't stress that enough but you need them just to make sure your body will not rupture. It can prevent so much side effects to EDs and even trip to the hospital.

20. Even fully recovered, the numbers won't magically stop in your mind. It will stay there lurking in the shadow.. try not to give in to them.

21. Keep yourself accountable. Stop blaming others or your life for things you have done. At the end of the day, you are the one doing everything. Excuses are not gonna help you acheive anything.

21. The sense of control is only temporary... One day you will have to go up agaist your demon and fight them or die trying.. literally.

22. Mixing BPD and anorexia was one of the biggest mistake of my life. Been the depressed and sucidal kid I was it really was a match made in hell. Actually really surprised I am still alive.

23. If you do purge, you have to understand a few things. Even if you were to purge the entirety of your stomach and that only mere second after finishing eating you body has already absorbed portion of the calories ! A general rules is that about 1/3 to 2/3 of it will be left behind. So no, this is not a miracle erase switch. Also, the calorie absortion start in your mouth. So the trick of chewing and spitting the food will still get you cals and it is even worse for your teeths. After a purge, do not brush your teeth. I swear it will fuck up your enamel even more. Try to swish some bicarbonate and water to bring the ph down and swallow half a glass to ease up your oesophagus.

24. This is not a all rainbows and unicorns illness. It is hard to life through and even harder to witness on someone. You will cry and scream.. feel depressed and suicidal in some case. Some of us dissociate during big binge/purge episode.. Get someone you trust or vent once in a while. Don't keep all the emotions inside, it will break you.

25. And finally, If you are not ready mentally for recovery it will never happen. You got to want it to be able to let go of your obsession. It is the hardest thing to do but it is worth it.

[doomedship]

Hello!

Eric did a new cameo and honestly it was just discouraging, earlier cameo’s he was so positive towards chenford and their progress and to a small extent he still is however he’s now said in this new cameo chenford won’t happen this season.

It feels like being strung along to keep ratings up because they know chenford is the biggest attention pull to the show.

Sorry for venting!

I would love to know your thoughts on this

Hmmm yes. I guess it's why I go back and forth on him doing these Cameos. I think it does mess with people's expectations and gets them anxious about what he's said. But they can be revealing.

We should remember the nature of Cameo means that Eric's taking people's money to talk about things on request - as a result, it's a bit of an act, right? He has to give people what they want, which is predominantly upbeat chat and Chenford clues. He also has to be vague enough that nothing is given away for sure. So these Cameos are kind of unreliable sources.

Although I do think he does his best to convey the general direction of travel for Chenford accurately, to the extent of his knowledge.

I'd guess at first Eric probably didn't know a lot about where the season was heading (I don't think they plan much for the season as a whole ahead of what they shoot). So probably in the past he was upbeat about Chenford in a very loose sense because he might have thought there would be meaningful development later on. There was maybe also a novelty factor in him recording these at first which has now worn off as the same questions get asked.

Naturally everyone took his early comments as gospel that things were definitely going somewhere. I think some are still clinging to those early ones even though that moment has well and truly passed, and it's become clearer that there was never a long-term plan to develop the relationship - the crumbs really were just crumbs.

I haven't watched many of them but it seems he's toning back on the encouragement for Chenford, doing a lot more expectation setting (i.e. set your expectations super low because Chenford ain't riding off into the sunset this season). I think that is a reasonable indication that we're going to suffer well into the back end of the season and quite probably for all of it, which stacks up given everything that's happened and the presence of Ashley.

But then the question is, how much does Eric know in advance? Has he actually been told by Alexi that Chenford definitely won't get anything this season? How many scripts has he seen? Could they still change course? Does he not know and he's just trying to keep expectations in check? I have no idea. These are all impossible to answer and they are very necessary to understand the impact of what Eric said.

I'd be inclined to take a pessimistic view, because I actually don't even feel that the show is using Chenford for ratings / pull anymore. It more seems like they don't especially care about Chenford as an audience sector because they know that people will tune in for other reasons (i.e. Nathan), so make the smallest effort possible to include minor clips just so there's something small to toss as scraps on social media every now and then. They rarely include Chenford in the episode teaser trailers and there's just so little content overall you have to conclude that they're not interested in developing this aspect of the show.

It's a bummer and I don't know whether I think it's helpful or not that Eric's making these comments tbh.

[villainessbian]

I think the issue here is there's no good definition of any wave's "ray." If someone's better at physics than me they can correct me, but I think that's accurate.

But only a weak scientist would let that stop them. Science after the cut.

If you want to quantify microwave energy, you can count the energy of a single microwave photon, a single microwave "grain of wave"... and for power, well, it's a bit more of a "how many of those photons does the microwave send per second?" issue.

We have a formula for that. We know e=hν, in which e is the energy of the photon, h is the Planck constant, and ν is the photon's frequency.

We know h is about 6.63 x 10^(-34) J/Hz (that's Joules per Hertz), and ν for microwave ovens is between 2.4 and 2.5 GHz (Gigahertz) or 2.4x10^9 and 2.5x10^9 Hz.

We're multiplying "Joules per Hertz" with "Hertz" so the two "Hertz"es "cancel out" (the same way it does when you play with fractions that only have numbers rather than physics in them), so we're left with "Joules," which is a unit of energy. Okay, this means we didn't mess up the theory. It's always nice to check so you know what you're doing.

We multiply them and we have an energy between 1.59x10^(-24) and 1.66x10^(-24) Joules per photon.

You need a few hundred thousand billion billions of those to heat even a drop of water by one degree Celsius (or Fahrenheit, actually). Good thing then that your microwave oven's magnetron (wave maker) can do that, no sweat. Though that's a bit hard to calculate at home. Please don't put a thermometer on a drop of water in your microwave oven.

But you were wondering about the power, not the energy. Though I'm afraid there's no perfect way to answer because it's hard to say what's "a ray" - I don't know of any way to calculate that by considering the wave as a continuous thing rather than a debit of photons... That said, you have something good that means I don't have to think about it myself. The power output of the magnetron should be written on your microwave oven somewhere, usually on the inside of the door or its frame. It's in Watts. If not, look at the power input (how much the microwave oven draws, often written in the back), and its output should be roughly half of it.

So now you have the total output inside your microwave. Should be somewhere between 700 and 1500 W, typically in the 900~1100 range. But the magnetron sends waves in several directions, to try and bathe your entire food in heat-giving waves. Well, it's kinda bad at this, because it's a precisely-set piece of electronics. It can do just a few directions, really. There's a "wave guide" that prevents it from throwing them around in places where they'll bounce back and make it cook itself, but that's about it. The wave guide is what makes the microwaves go where your food is, which is what we want. But even then, there are only a few places that actually heat up.

Your microwave oven has hot spots, and cold spots. That's why the plate rotates. Otherwise parts of your food are hot and the rest isn't. That's also why the "defrost" setting just goes MMMMMMM (stop) MMMMMMM (stop) MMMMMMM - its goal is actually to stop heating regularly and leave time for the parts that heated up to thaw the rest.

Not every microwave oven has the same amount. And I don't really know if they're the result of the waves going specifically in certain places, or some weird resonating effect after the waves bounced everywhere seventeen times around the inside walls of the oven. Looking at the patterns they make, I'm guessing both. Thing is, waves can add up or subtract from each other depending on things that I won't get into here because it's already getting long. It's the equivalent of how two literal waves on the sea can climb each other or the hole of one can be filled by the crest of the other resulting in a flat sea, but with "intensity and polarity of the generated electromagnetic fields" instead of "is the water high or low." Shit, I did get into it. It's a cool thing, sue me.

But if you want to know how much power is experienced in any one spot of your microwave, your best shot is (1) learning the full power output of your microwave oven (2) dividing that by the number of hot spots it has. If the hot spots look like spots in the first place, because sometimes they don't. Then you should do some area calculation, it's more tedious but still relatively easy.

Why divide? Because if there are four hot spots, then only one fourth of the power can go to any one. If there are six, only one sixth of the power goes to any one. Etc.

And there's a fun way to see exactly that!

Put something in that'll cook in a showy way, or burn (for instance, moistened paper on a cardboard plate), or melt (like marshmallows or chocolate). But first, remove the carousel. Otherwise your food will move and it won't show. Don't put grapes in. I'm serious, don't put grapes in your microwave oven. It'll make plasma, which is super cool scientifically speaking, what with the intense blue flame-like apparitions, but will cost you your microwave oven. And trigger your fire alarm. And the grape won't even taste good.

The link I gave you shows cool effects with Indian snacks. You can see where any microwave oven does heat stuff with that kind of trick, and reveal the invisible patterns of energy going on when you press the button.

Buttered toast will work, but stuff that burns is clearer. And these appalams apparently are efficient too!

Note: that will not only tell you the answer to your question, but reveal how good your microwave oven is - or how bad it is. You can literally diagnose whether your microwave oven, that marvel of modern engineering that uses strong magnets to influence the paths of electrons through weird acts of resonance, is a piece of shit - using just a few crackers.

Science, bitch.

the pain of trying to figure out how much power is behind a single microwave ray while a kitchen appliance exists

[themadauthorshatter]

More Ineffable Husbands Headcanons! Because I love these guys

Due to his immunity to and ability to breathe fire, Aziraphale once referred to Crowley as a dragon. Crowley was not amused.

Crowley hated Hell because it was hot, everyone was too close, and, only being the guy that caused his own misery than others', people always openly asked why he was still around or when Hastur and Ligur would just MAKE him be more useful for the powers of evil, so it quickly became a thing of 'everyone's too close to me and wants me dead. HELP.' He cannot stand being shoulder to shoulder with someone while walking, like walking close enough to everyone's close enough to touch each other and breathing on each other's necks. Even sneaking around as a snake and going in small places freaks him out. He can stand being in Aziraphale's place, but still looks over his shoulder, just in case.

On the other end, Aziraphale DETESTED Heaven with a passion. It was cold, no one talked, it smelled like cold, stale air all the time, and people were more concerned about themselves, the war, and the archangels than anything else. He grew to resent the cold, the silence, the echo of his own voice, and all the open space. There weren't any books, either. He has been to Crowley's place and he doesn't mind it, but he stays close to Crowley because he doesn't want to be alone in a large space again.

So yeah, Crowley's personal hell is a very, VERY small hot room, like a closet or a pantry and Aziraphale's personal hell is a a cold, empty building with no carpet, all windows, and no furniture, except for a few metal folding chairs.

Crowley has balance issues, even after all his time on Earth. He also has a bit of numbness in his arms and legs. (Snek)

Don't take a picture of Aziraphale and Crowley. Aziraphale just doesn't like it(look up biblically accurate angels and look at the principalities), and Crowley looks freaky as hell. Like he looks like a man-serpent thing. And the sound bothers him.

Crowley does not shed his skin... in front of Aziraphale.

Ways the two playfully annoy each other: Crowley adds too much pepper to his drink and says he's having and wonderful meal, Aziraphale purposely gets plant names wrong, Crowley reads AND ANNOTATES a book IN RED INK, Aziraphale walks around barefoot, Crowley asks what Aziraphale is doing when they're just chilling, and Aziraphale will wear all tartan clothing.

Aziraphale once did the 'What the fluff' challenge with a sleepy Crowley and it scared him witless.

This is based off of the fact, I think, that Crowley does have a sweet tooth and off a deleted scene in Good Omens, so Crowley indeed invented chocolate for Aziraphale, but whenever he failed he was sure to clean the mess. It gave him a sugar high for 42 hours straight and the resulting hangover knocked him out for a week.

Aziraphale isn't good with alcohol, but the man can hold his spices like a champ.

Crowley cannot handle salt. At all. Kind of like Holy water, it burns him, except it's a burn that he can heal from.

Aziraphale prefers showers because it reminds him of rain, while Crowley takes baths because it's quiet amd he can calm down.

Hastur and Ligur have 'confronted' Crowley on his job performance. He doesn't like talking about it and often says he only remembers leaving the room with a broken arm and being unable to walk because his back- from his neck to his waist- hurt like a son of a bitch. Yes, he has scars.

Aziraphale saw the Spanish Enquisition. He hated it.

During a war, while in bad spirits and ready to go sleep through the year, Crowley stumbled upon Aziraphale as he pretended to be dead, as a way to 'play his part' on Earth. It wasn’t cowardice, as he did some fighting, but Crowley was still surprised to see him. The two left and went somewhere that was as peaceful as possible to wait out the rest of the war. Worth it.

The two take turns preening each other's wings.

Want to know why Crowley wasn't around for a while after Bastille? Well, Hastur and Ligur got a hold of him and... well, let's just say they taught him to (A) be a faster runner and (B) not kept too comfortable around humans or being a human because, inhabiting the form of one, that means he can be broken very, VERY easily until there's nothing to fix.

I will make an analysis post on the relationship between Crowley and Hastur and Ligur, like his connection to them.

Back on track, Aziraphale and Crowley have shared a bed from time to time, like a sleepover, and it's usually the same: the two are back to back for a while before falling asleep and awaking in each other's arms. In variation, Aziraphale will stay up to read a little and catch Crowley having a bad dream(because he used to sleep in Hell) and has to ruffle his hair or do the forehead to nose rub/tuckle to calm him back down. In another variation, Aziraphale will dose off only to wake up and find Crowley watching him or guarding the room because he used to sleep in Hell, and because he wants to keep Aziraphale safe. And he just likes seeing his angel sleep; is not a creepy thing, it just reminds him that he's not alone in enjoying 'human' things.

Crowley is not a fan of dogs. One chased him while he was in snake form.

Aziraphale doesn't hate technology by any means. He just prefers talking to people face to face(specifically Crowley).

Don't ask about the snake marks on the sides of Crowley's head. Just don't.

You know how cats and dogs have that thing where in certain light their pupils change color and they see in the dark? Crowley does the exact same thing and it has woken up Aziraphale so many times. It never scared him, it just made him literally pull Crowley into bed so he could sleep.

Crowley hates the horsemen because he lost a bet to all of them.

You know the Squid Game version of Red Light, Green Light? Aziraphale would win by only stopping at 'Red light,' and Crowley would win by staying low and creeping.

Of all the archangels, Crowley actually liked Michael best. They got along well, but that was before the Fall.

[ceescedasticity]

perspectives on the AFTERMATH of the first kinslaying, ii

(you might want to check out the other parts first)

(and/or read what’s on AO3)

Queen Nénwen:

An aid party of a dozen Vanyar — six healers and six more general helpers — arrived so soon after the ships left that they must have set out not only before the fighting was over but before any of Arafinwë or Nolofinwë's people knew anything was happening. Possibly they were advised by the Holy Ones. Possibly some in Fëanáro's host told wives they'd left in Tirion, who then passed word along quietly.

I hope it was the latter because I feel a Holy One who took notice of the battle might have had more productive courses of action available to them than sending a dozen Vanyar who would only arrive hours later.

In addition to their help with the many wounded, they also provided some special-formulation miruvor that restored to Duimiwen and Nettë to functionality… remarkably quickly.

Duimiwen Elulindiel:

Yes, when a Vanyarin healer gave me cordial, I headbutted her and broke her nose. She was very understanding. Even with the cordial I was too weary to be embarrassed.

Grandfather asked me if I'd rather organize searching the rubble of the Cradle and its neighbors for survivors or go around reassuring people that they could come out of hiding and start recovery efforts now. I picked the first immediately. He sent Nettë to do the second. …It didn't occur to me at the time but I can't imagine he would have sent Nettë to the Cradle even if I'd chosen otherwise — not with Aunt Néthalinda under there somewhere. I wonder what he would have done.

Nettë Glavariel:

I never believed Angaráto and Aikanáro about Vanyarin cordials, either. Showed me.

I'm told I did a decent job reassuring people and directing them to the temporary hospitals. I felt like I was on the verge of tears the entire time and probably visibly wanted to hide under my bed, but maybe not.

There were a lot of questions about who was dead, who was alive and wounded, who was still missing, and—

Shortly before this — after the Darkening but before the Noldor went mad — I was involved in an attempt to compile a list of all Grandfather's subjects for the first time. Well, Grandfather says that when they set out from Cuiviénen, he and Grandmother and Elwë between them knew every one of the Nelyar undertaking the journey by name and face, but I don't think I believe that. Regardless, no one was keeping track of everyone during the Noontide.

But then the Trees were dead, and— I don't know if it was the lack of light or… the relevant Valie… being preoccupied, but two-thirds of the prospective grain harvest died. Fruit trees didn't die, but they didn't start fruiting, either, and the ones which had already started were stunted. Even little kitchen gardens like our people had grown on Tol Eressëa or back in Beleriand, under the stars, got droopy.

Fortunately the grass seemed fine so most of the herds were all right so far, and fish seemed unaffected, but we still had a looming food shortage. We were planning of centralization of existing stores and then distributing them according to need, and to do that we'd need to know what the need was, which meant an accurate count of people and descriptions of their states of maturity.

(In the end we didn't need to, because when the Vanyar aid parties realized how much trouble we were having, they sent for some of the Maiar who'd been keeping things growing in Valinor proper. We'd had no idea that was an option.) (Anyway. Trying to count people.)

We were patching together guild records and tax records and court records, and just adding people we thought wouldn't be in any other records, and the result was a mess. A lot of people weren't on it, and a lot of people were on it more than once. And that was the best we had.

Why this is relevant is that it's very hard to come up with a definitive list of people who aren't accounted for when you don't have a list of people who need to be accounted for.

I ended up just telling people to write down — or find someone to write down — what they knew and what they wanted to know, and we'd… try to come up with something.

I have no idea why people were reassured by this.

[theclassiccake]

Hello! excuse me, i wanted to ask you for some advice in writing, i'm trying writing Characters like Facilier for some ideas i have for my s/i, but it's jjust gives me writing block, how do you do to come up with scenarios or ideas for him? or just whats comes to mind work? Thanks!! :)))

Writing advice ay? 🤔

I'll try my best to explain, bare with me please ty <3

So for Facilier, I've gotten some inspiration from fics and other works about him. I try to go off from the movie as much as I can, but he's not really shown a lot.

What really helps me though is considering his personality and the time he's from. I don't normally explore those kinds of themes into my work, but I try to consider how he would feel or act.

(I mean his motive in the movie is understandable. He lives in a segregated country in the 1920s. A really messed up point in time, it's no wonder he wants to rip off the rich.)

I'd imagine that he still has a moral compass if anything.

Regarding his personality, he's a con man. A swindler with a silver tongue. Or as Naveen put it best, he's very charismatic. And as a villian, I think that makes him even more dangerous than his magic.

When it comes to the scenarios, I just like to think that he's charming with his partner as well. The ol' southern hospitality if you will. In my drafts, I try to make him compassionate yet still at little withdrawn.

He owes the Loa, he's pretty much in a constant state of anxiety if the film proves anything. He's just.. really good at masking it.

Meaning he's not very good or at least used to talking about his feelings. I doubt there was anyone to stop and listen to him.

His reputation precedes him. He's only known as "The Shadowman" and I'm sure people are afraid just at the mere mention of that nickname. As a result, he's used to feeling isolated. He's used to being alone.

During the times I have more requests than anticipated, I try to pace myself. If I need a break from writing, I do so to make sure I don't burn myself out.

With that being said, your first draft doesn't need to be "perfect" or "accurate". It's whatever you feel like writing and whatever you want to share or just write for yourself. That's something I've been doing recently.

(I have a habit of repeating phrases, so I'm trying to expand my vocabulary.)

And don't stress too much about proofreading either, there's always a chance to revise and edit whenever you can. Part of the reason why I enjoy posting my works on here so much.

Overall, just do what you feel is best! It's always good to start somewhere, even if you're still learning. :^]

[wickedbarnes]

Romeo and Juliet | Ted Logan x Reader

A prompt by the lovely @ringa-starr. Thank you for sending this one in! Hopefully I gave it the justice it deserved.

NOTE: I'm very sorry if my portrayal of Ted isn't accurate to the one in the movies. I promise I'll try and do better.

WARNING: Fluff. Slight Angst.

--

Ted took a deep breath as he bounced his leg nervously as he awaited the result regarding his audition for Romeo. But he wasn't alone. You and Bill were also waiting with him. You had auditioned for the part of Juliet while Bill had also auditioned for the part of Romeo. For Juliet, it was down to you and another student while Bill and Ted were the ones competing for the role of Romeo.

In all honesty, Ted wouldn't mind if Bill got the role. He was his best friend after all. But somehow, he hoped he'd be the one getting it considering he wants to do the play with you, if ever you'd be the one getting the role of Juliet but that's already a question he knew the answer of.

Ted was never a fan of theatrical plays nor did he master the art of acting. But he pushed himself through and did his best to rehearse for this play. He couldn't afford making mistakes, he was determined to get this part. However, his thoughts have abruptly stopped the moment Mrs. Atkins, the play director, called you and the other girl back inside the audition room.

It didn't take that long before you bursted out of the audition room, yelling in victory while having the biggest smile on your face. You didn't even give a second thought on hugging both your best friends excitedly before pulling away and taking a deep breath.

"I got the part!" You beamed, causing Ted to smile widely at you before both him and Bill did their infamous air guitar gesture.

"That's most excellent, Y/N! You deserve it!" Bill ruffled your hair while Ted reached over to pinch your cheek affectionately. But the celebration was cut short when the Director called for his and Bill's name.

Upon taking another deep breath, the duo made their way inside and closed the door behind them before sitting down on the chair infront of the Director and the two others that were also going to manage the play.

"Both of you are surprisingly good at acting. I think the both of you excerted more effort than the ones who have auditioned earlier but of course, we only have to pick one for the role of Romeo." Mrs. Atkins began as she looked down at the list that she had in her hands before averting her eyes back to the two boys in front of her.

Ted looked down at his hands as he bit his bottom lip nervously and let out a breath before he began to chant silently in his head.

Please be me, please be me, please be me, please be me, please be-

"Congratulations, Mr. Preston Esq. You'll be starring as Romeo for the play." Ted immediately looked up at Mrs. Atkins who had reached over to shake Bill's hand. Bill gasped in surprised and quickly jumped up from his seat, shaking Mrs. Atkins' hand along with the others and thanking them profusely.

"I'm sorry, Ted. You were really good, I have to be honest with that. But we just found something in Bill that we didn't quite find in you when you were portraying Romeo. You would've been a great Romeo. You would've matched well with Y/N!" Mrs. Atkins gave Ted an apologetic look but Ted immediately smiled at him and shook his head.

"Nonsense, Mrs. Atkins. My buddy Bill here deserves to get the part. The experience I got from audition has been most triumphant." Ted did a fancy bow that made the people in front of him chuckle.

As they got out of the audition room, Bill immediately made his way towards you and hugged you excitedly while Ted chose to fall behind, a small smile tugging on his lips as he watched how excited you were that Bill got the part.

"Congratulations, dude. I'm sure you're gonna be excellent out there. And of course, you too, Y/N." Ted smiled as Bill threw his arm over his shoulder.

There was no doubt Bill deserved to get the part. But deep down, he was hoping it'd be him. He had this plan, you see. That he'd finally confess his feelings to you after the whole ordeal. And the fact that there was a kissing scene in the play only motivated him to push for the role. After that, he'd ask you out to the upcoming prom.

But it seems that fate had other plans.

--

It had been a few weeks since you and Bill had been casted for the role of Romeo and Juliet. And that meant you two spent more time together doing rehearsals. And that also meant less time with Ted. Ted had tried his best to understand your side but he couldn't help the fact that he felt as if he was being pushed away.

He also tried to ignore the pain in his chest whenever Bill would rehearse his lines to you, acting as Romeo and looking at you with these eyes while saying such affectionate words. But it was hard. It resulted to him being easily irritated and quite distant. But it only angered him more when it seemed as if you and Bill were too busy to even notice how he's doing.

It was the night before the much awaited play. And despite how upset Ted got over the whole situation, he promised he'd be there somewhere in the auditorium watching the play. He wouldn't miss it for the world. He knew how hard you and Bill worked for it. But the feeling of jealousy still hasn't left his body. Ted somehow felt selfish.

"I'm so nervous, Ted. What if I mess up? What if people aren't satisfied with my performance?" You sighed deeply and looked up at Ted with your bright doe eyes, "I worked so hard for this, I can't afford to make a mistake."

Ted's heart softened at the sight of you. You were wearing the most beautiful dress he had ever seen. Your hair and makeup done to perfection and it only made him fall for you even more. You looked like an angel.

"Y/N, that's bogus. Stop being so hard on yourself. I know you'll do great, I just do. Don't stress yourself out too much and enjoy your time out there. As long as you're happy with what you're doing, people will enjoy your performance." Ted smiled and tucked a loose piece of hair behind your ear.

"How would you know that?" You asked and Ted would stare at you with this look on his face. Seriousness etched on his features as he replied.

"Because I believe in you. I always have." His words definitely caught you off guard. Ted wasn't one to be so serious but there were times that he was. And his words of encouragement made your stomach do a back flip.

"I don't know what I'd do without you, Ted Logan." A smile made its way to your face and Ted did too. But deep down, he knew you had only meant those words platonically.

"Now go be excellent out there."

--

After bidding both you and Bill good luck, Ted had situated himself in a seat that wasn't too far nor too near the stage. He was excited yet nervous to watch the play. But once it started, Ted found himself completely enamoured with the story and with you. Your beauty was unlike no other and the fact that the light was hitting your features so perfectly was only adding up to the fact that you were indeed the prettiest of the bunch.

But then, the kissing scene began.

Ted found himself gripping his seat tightly as he watched Bill cup your face as he slowly leaned in. His jaw clenched the moment your lips touched and letting it move in sync. Ted shouldn't be jealous. He shouldn't but he couldn't help it. The scene in front of him was becoming a blur and he now realized that tears were forming in his eyes and almost immediately, he stood up and made his way outside of the auditorium in a hasty pace.

You had seen the whole thing. But didn't see the how heartbroken Ted looked before he walked away. You had willed yourself to push through because the last thing you wanted was to mess up just because you got distracted. Somehow, along the way up until the play had finished, you hoped for Ted to come back. But his seat remained empty.

After all of the cast had bowed down, you looked at Bill but it seemed as if he didn't even notice Ted's untimely departure. Once you all got backstage, you immediately your way to your corner and quietly shed a tear until you heard Bill approaching you with the happiest look on his face.

"That was the most triumphant play I've ever done! Congrats to us, dudette!" He beamed and his energy caused you to smile a bit.

"Congrats to us." You replied, engulfing Bill in a hug before he let go of you and looked around.

"Where's Ted?" He asked confusingly and upon the mention of his name, anger and sadness bubbled inside you.

"He walked out." You said, your hands clenching into fists.

"What?"

"He walked out. I saw him earlier after we did the kissing scene." You sighed and felt your tears welling up in your eyes, "I thought he wanted to watch us, I thought he said I was good. I thought he was only going for a bathroom break but he never returned."

You were so proud with the work you've done with Ted that you just couldn't wait to show him. All the times you've spent apart from him, you had silently promised it'd be worth it. You wanted to make him proud, to impress him even. You had silently hoped that maybe after this play he'd be able to see you as something more... something more than a friend.

But maybe you were wrong.

"Let me find him, Y/N. He's not like this at all, it's so heinous and very bogus. Stay here and I'll-"

"Bill!" Bill looked back and saw his parents waving excitedly at him. Sighing, he put a comforting hand on your shoulder before he walked over to them.

The unsettling feeling in your stomach irritated you and you found yourself making your way past everyone, trying your best to acknowledge the ones who congratulated you. Once you made your way outside the auditorium, the wind gently hit you causing your white dress to flow freely with the wind.

Your eyes scanned the area until you had eventually found Ted's familiar figure sitting on a nearby bench, his back turned towards you. Taking a deep breath, you angrily marched your way to him until you were standing by his side, seeing that he was slouched forward, arms resting on his thighs while he absentmindedly fumbled with a piece of grass.

"How could you? I thought you said you were going to watch the play, Ted. I thought you said I was good. I thought you were going to support Bill and I tonight!" You exclaimed, "I worked so hard on that play and I was so excited for you to see it and what did you do? You walk out! That's such an asshole move, Ted. So... so heinous of you!"

Your outburst only caused Ted to chuckle, seeming as that was the first time he had heard you talk like him and Bill. But this angered you more.

"Are you even listening to me, Theodore?! God, you're not even looking at me!"

"Because if I do, I don't know if I can stop myself, Y/N, and I don't want to do something that might ruin our friendship!" Ted backfired causing you to snap your mouth shut as he turned his head up to look at you.

The sight of you in a flowy white dress caused Ted's mouth to go dry. You looked so fucking beautiful and he had no idea how to deal with it. And with the way the moonlight was delicately hitting your face made everything so complicated.

"What do you mean, Ted?"

Ted let out a scoff at your question as he stood up and frustratedly ran his fingers through his long, thick mop of hair.

"Y/N, I couldn't watch the play for any longer, not because I'm not proud of you, not because I don't think you're any good. But because I couldn't stand you kissing Bill."

"Ted, it's just acting-"

"I know it's just acting, Y/N, that's the thing! But for the life of me, I can't seem to fathom the image of you kissing someone that isn't me." Ted had let the words out before he could even think them through, "The moment you kissed Bill on that stage, I felt like my heart's gonna burst with jealousy. It was very heinous of me, I know. But what I'd give anything to be in Bill's place."

You stood frozen on your spot, trying to decipher whether you were hearing Ted's words right. You had discreetly pinched your thighs to try and wake yourself up from his dream but realized this was all reality.

"Why do you think I wanted to play Romeo so bad? Why do you think I did my best to get that role? I wanted so badly to do that play with you but I know I shouldn't be selfish so when Bill got it, I had no choice but to be happy for him. God, Y/N, you have no idea how deep I am in this because of you. I was even going to ask you to go to prom with me!"

A gasp escaped your lips but Ted took your reaction in a negative way. In his mind, he already knew you were going to reject him. Why would someone like you go out with someone like him? He was lucky he got the chance to be friends with you. In his mind, he was nothing special, he was too weird and he felt as if he wasn't even that smart. You deserved someone much better than he is.

"Ted..."

"No, Y/N, I get it. I know what you're going to say. But before this friendships ends, I just want to let this out of my chest." He took a deep breath and closed his eyes for a moment before opening them again, his warm chocolate eyes looking back into yours.

"Ted..." You said once again, trying to get his attention when he began to take a step closer to you.

"Y/N. I, Theodore Logan, am incredibly, deeply, excellently in love with you. I have been ever since you bought me my favorite snacks when I got upset even when it was raining. I have been ever since I found out how adorable you look when you snort whenever you laugh. Or how you silently sing to yourself whenever you do your homework or that one time you saved a dog from getting hit by a car. No part of you is worth calling bogus. And with all the babes I've seen here in San Dimas, you're the only one that matters."

You hadn't known what came over you but one moment you were standing in front of your dorky best friend and the next your lips were suddenly on his. You could tell how shocked Ted was by the sudden action but he soon relaxed and reciprocated your kiss, moving his lips in sync with yours. His kiss was gentle yet firm and passionate. It was as he was desperate to kiss you more but was afraid to scare you away.

Soon enough, you pulled away and tried to catch your breath, resting your forehead against his as a smile made its way to both your faces.

"Bogus, Ted. What took you so long?" You giggled, a soft blush making its way to your face as Ted laughed giddily in response.

"Lack of courage. But it's all worth since this is the most triumphant night of my life, my Juliet." His words made a melodius laugh escape your lips as you threw your head back in laughter.

"Such a dork you are, my Romeo." You smiled just as Ted leaned in to press another kiss on your lips, his arms wrapping around your waist.

However, you soon broke away when you heard someone yell in surprise.

"Woah!" Bill looked back and forth at the both of you, his face contorted into a look of shock while you and Ted had the same look on your faces. Neither of you said anything until the duo did their infamous air guitar gesture.

"Excellent!" They said in unison as you stood there laughing and shaking your head at your best friend and hopefully new boyfriend, Ted.

[imaginexmeintheuniverse]

Ok girlie I see your tags on the prompts and I’m. Here. For. It. Please do i’m the only one who gets your costume and apparently that makes you wanna rip my clothes off with my baby Peter maximoff I’m so freaking thirsty for him

i’m the only one whogets your costume and apparently that makes you wanna rip my clothes off +we’re secret friends with benefits and you accidentally wore my shirt to theparty so you’re pretending you came as me and it turns out your impression ofme is on point and you know me better than I know myself are you sure you’renot in love with me??

Word count: 1, 845

A/N: GIRL I GOT YOU

“I thought you said you weren’t going to dress up forthis,” Peter appears before you with a gust of wind that blows your loosehair back.

Raising an eyebrow at him, you lift your arms up at theelbows and reply, “I’m not…?”

The corners of his mouth curl up in a smirk as he looks youup and down, and realizes you aren’t aware that you’re wearing his shirt. Thelook of utter confusion on your face changes slowly as you look down to see thefamiliar Pink Floyd Dark Side of the Moonalbum cover print on the front of your— well, Peter’s t-shirt.

“Shit.”You curse under your breath, hoping no one else will notice that the shirt yourwearing isn’t yours.

“Hey, isn’t that Peter’s shirt?” Jubilee chirps,popping up out of nowhere with Kurt by her side and you start to panic becausethat really didn’t take long. Normally,you probably wouldn’t make a huge deal about wearing a friend’s shirt, butPeter isn’t like the rest of your friends, given the circumstances whichresulted in you wearing it. You had stayed in Peter’s bed while he was gettinghis costume ready after your, ehm, activitiesearlier. Long story short, you must have left too quickly and picked up thewrong shirt from the pile of clothes on the floor as you made your swift exit.

“Uh, y-yeah—” you stutter, completely caughtoff-guard, and as if on cue, the rest of the squad shows up. Great.

“Is Y/N wearing Peter’s shirt?” Scott asks,slightly confused.

“Yeah,” Peter interjects, saving you from beinggrilled. “I’m so much cooler than all of you that she decided to dress upas me.”

“Wow, Y/N,” Warren dramatically puts a hand overhis chest. “I thought we had something special.”

“Way to put some effort into your costume,” Jean snorts,her lips curved in a teasing grin.

“Yeah, it seems like she’s just missing a little—”Peter zooms off before finishing his sentence, and as per usual, he’s back asfast as he left. You don’t have time to blink before you find yourself with hissilver leather jacket around your shoulders and he’s grinning down at you as hegently places his goggles on your head. You smile back up at him, silentlythanking him as you slide your arms through the sleeves of his flashy jacket.

“And what are you supposed to be?” Jubilee asks, examiningPeter like he’s a foreign entity.

It takes you no time at all recognize Peter’s costume; apin-striped suit, the jacket a little wide and boxy, his hair is slicked down,and to top it all off, a pencil moustache. You and Peter spent hoursmarathoning the Addams Family on old recorded tapes, how could you not know?

“I think he’s supposed to be a gangster like from thoseold movies you showed me,” Kurt guesses, and Peter shakes his head inresponse.

“I’m actually—”

“I think you gangster costume is missing a fedora,”Scott comments, and Peter drags out an exasperated sigh.

“All right, I give up,” Peter throws his hands upin surrender. “I’m gonna go get a drink.”

The crowd parts as he speeds his way through to therefreshments table— which at this point, is a punch bowl mixed withgod-knows-what, with  a stack of cups anda few bottles of different drinks and alcohol. Meanwhile, you and the rest ofthe group start to converse, dance, and play Halloween-themed party games. Uponrequest, you start doing your impression of Peter— which you totally nail— andhave everyone in a fit of laughter as the night goes on.

You can only dance around and play party games so muchbefore you become a sweaty mess, so you make a short trip to the bathroom tocool down. When you exit, you see Peter leaning back on the wall of thehallway, waiting for you with a red cup in each hand, one of which he holds outto you.

“Merci,”You accept the cup with a sly smile, and he seems taken aback. You eyes don’tleave his as you bring the cup up to your lips and you see his slightlysurprised expression change to a pleased one. “Don’t think I haven’tnoticed your costume, mon chérie.”

“Cara mía,”A smile takes over his features and there is nothing he can do to stop it. Infact, he’d be telling the biggest lie he’s ever told if he said that you beingthe only person to get his costume andspeaking French didn’t turn him on.

“So, what do you think of my impression of you?”you ask, a playful smirk curving your lips.

“It could use some work,” he says nonchalantly, shiftingso that his side leans on the wall.

“Please,”You roll your eyes, and punch him lightly on the bicep. “I totally nailedyou!”

“Yeah you did,” he smirks, as you mentally slapyourself because you should have seen it coming. “Speaking of which,”He takes a step closer to you and his voice takes on a mischievous tone. Yourchests are mere inches apart, and as the seconds pass, Peter  gets increasingly impatient. All he wants todo is tear your— err— his clothes offof you. “We should totally go somewhere and get weird with eachother.”

Dismissing his last comment, you take another sip of yourdrink. “I’ve got you pinned—”

“Yeah you will—”

“I know you better than you know yourself.” Yourgaze bores into his big brown eyes . His pupils are totally blown and there’s ahint of something else you can’t quite put your finger on. The tension onlythickens between you and him, and it feels different than the usual sexualbuild up. It’s the same feeling that made you rush out of his room earlier.

That feeling was so small when you and Peter first startedyour— for lack of a better word— arrangement.You were friends, but not that close; he was attractive, but not someone yousaw as a romantic prospect. As the weeks passed, you started hanging aroundmore with him afterwards, and him with you. Like every friends-with-benefitsagreement, you’re supposed to call it off the second someone catches feelings,but as you realized that afternoon, it turns out you’ve been repressing a lotof feelings for a while now.

To make things more confusing, it was something so simplethat brought on your great epiphany. You had stayed in his bed after sex,clothed in nothing but your underwear and one of his oversized sweaters whilehe showered. He came back to find you had fallen asleep, and woke you up withthe sweetest kiss. His lips felt softer than usual, he smelled of soap, and thewet tips of his hair tickled your cheeks. The smile you saw when you openedyour eyes, made you feel like you were exactly where you were supposed to be.The second he turned around and headed to his closet, it hit you all at onceand you panicked. That’s when you ditched the sweater and left in a hurry,picking up the wrong shirt in the process.

Going through your memory, you swear there are times wherehe had those feelings. Every time, you got scared and must have thought aboutcalling the whole thing off a dozen times, but you and him fell into a grooveand somewhere along the way you subconsciously got attached. And now, as hestands in front of you, you search his eyes for that same spark and you’re moreconfused than ever.

“So you’ve been paying attention to me,” You snortat the cocky expression on his face, once again repressing the hell out of yourfeelings and keep up the back and forth flirting game the two of you alwaysplay. “If I didn’t know any better, I’d say you’re in love with me.”

“Don’t flatter yourself—” You tip your cup andgulp down the rest of whatever liquid is in it— it tastes like rum and coke,but not quite the same. “We made rules for a reason, remember?” Ruleswhich you’ve already broken.

After all this time you’d think you’d be used to it, but itfeels like all oxygen has escaped your lungs when you notice that his lips are real close to yours. His eyes dart downand come back up to meet yours. “Are you sure you’re not in love with me,Y/L/N?” He’s giving you major heart palpitations and your stomach is doingsome crazy flips, but you definitely can’t tell him that.

“Don’t push it, Maximoff.” You crush the empty cupin your hand and watch it turn to dust and eventually disappear as you vaporizeit. “I’ll see you later— my room.” He’s not sure what it is aboutthat that kind of turns him on, but he definitely doesn’t hate it. Spinning onyour heel, you call over your shoulder as you make your way back to the party, “Andget rid of the pencil stache!”

Before you can join back with the rest of the squad, you’restopped by your best friend— and she just about startled the crap out of you.“So, were you ever going to tell me about you and Peter?”

“Were you eavesdropping?!”

“How long have you guys been a thing?”

“Were you— uh we're— we’re not a thing—”

“I’m gonna take a wild guess… three months?”

“Accurate.”

You and Jean keep going back and forth, her firing questionsat you, and you trying your best to dodge them until she asks the one thatstops you.

“How long have you been in love with him?”

You freeze for a moment before turning into a stutteringmess. “I-I- love? P-Peter? No— I don't—” You think your heart mightjump right out of your chest and you jump to the first conclusion you can thinkof. “You read my mind?!”

“Not yours,”she specifies, eyes darting over to where Peter is dancing like a mad man.“It’s hard not to hear histhoughts when he’s pretty much screaming them, trust me I’ve tried.”

“I swear I wanted to tell you, but we agreed on certain,ehm, terms and conditions when thisstarted— we thought it would be better if no one knew.”

“It’s okay,” you’re a little surprised, but gladthat she’s hugging you instead of being salty about not telling her. You’re notsure why you expected anything different, she’s always been supportive. ���Butare you sure you’re not in love withhim?” It’s almost chilling; those same words came from Peter just momentsago. You look over to where he’s dancing like a total dad, and that samefeeling washes over you again. You’re not sure whether or not you can lie toyour best friend— it wouldn’t make a difference even if you did because youboth already know the answer to that question.

Masterlist | Request a Halloween/Autumn drabble!