#i don't know of i should colour the blanket
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leafteaposts · 3 months ago
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A drawing with a background! Rip me and.my markers. Me an idiot: I suck at drawing folds, let's make a pattern for the blanket. But shhh, look at the cat!
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uncanny-tranny · 1 year ago
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I laid out the crochet blanket I'm making for my cat, and she's lying on it even though she can only fit two thirds if her body onto it right now and this is making it all worth it 😭😭😭😭
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elenadoeslife · 1 year ago
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I don't think I've had such a bad night of sleep in ages. I couldn't fall asleep for hours. I was physically tired, but my mind kept racing like it was trying to claim pole position in a Grand Prix.
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iid-smile · 2 months ago
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handsy , itadori yuji
x gn!reader ! cuddling in the cold, itadori touches your buttocks, he calls you hot, that's it really...
author's note: um i had this idea in my head but i didnt know who to write for also kinda rushed because i cba
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"baby..." itadori's voice is severely muffled from his lips being pressed against your neck. "it's cold."
you're both facing each other in bed, his arms securely wrapped around your waist and yours just resting on his chest. though it's september, it's not usual for the temperature to drop in such a sudden way.
it's a weird contrast, the way it's so cold outside while it's so warm under the blanket. it makes you want to shrink further into it, but your boyfriend's presence just makes you a tad more reluctant to even move at all.
with only a small hum coming from you, your fingers fiddle with his hoodie strings. it only takes a short time for him to get sulky when you don't respond with words, so you mumble back. "i know, that's why we're cuddling."
he wiggles his legs a bit, which are already tangled with yours. you were half bracing yourself for him to be cold to the touch, but he's just warm. he's always so warm.. how? "it's colddd..." he complains again.
his arms around you tighten a bit, making it slightly harder to breathe, but you know that he just does it subconsciously. "i want hot chocolate.." he murmurs.
by chance, you manage to pick up on his words, your arms moving to wrap around his neck. "you already had some, yuji." shifting closer, you rest your head close to his. not to close that your cheeks are touching, not too far that you can see each other.
itadori remains silent, a small huff coming from him, like he knows better than to argue with you. he's so clingy. and a baby, sometimes. he's acting like you didn't feed him the most filling dinner ever. his favourite too! and hot chocolate on top of that? he should know that's enough. but that pouting expression gets to your weak heart, so you shift around a bit.
you could hear him softly groan, likely from the way your legs move to intertwine with his more, and the way your body heat is now pushed directly up against his. with ease, he nuzzles his face further into your shoulder, hiding it completely. "mhm..." he hums, and you can feel the vibrations of it against your skin.
your fingers curl around his messy locks, and you admire the seemingly natural pink colour as best you can with the minimal light. "mhm what?" you inquire, confused since you didn't ask him a question.
"nevermind the hot chocolate..." his voice is barely comprehensible. "i got something hot right here."
"...you need to specify."
"i mean it both ways. you're hot, and you're hot."
you can only sigh, rolling your eyes. if you didn't find his stupid comments so adorable, and charming, you would've thrown a pillow at him. but unfortunately since you're cuddling, you just allow the cheesy comments to slip by. like usual.
"i hate you." you mutter.
he only responds with a chuckle. "no, you love me."
"i do..." you sigh again. his arms around you loosen up slightly, and one of his hands starts roaming a little.
it's quiet for a while, after itadori's giddy chuckles of course. despite how dark it is, you struggle to keep your eyes closed, feeling your eyelids shake whenever you try, as if you're tense. the only view you really have is his hair shoved in your face, but either way, you don't mind.
being the handsy guy he is, there's not a single spot where he hasn't touched you. shoulder, back, hips, waist, thighs, everywhere. a little thought in your head was telling you they were destined to end up elsewhere, and you're surprised it hasn't happened yet.
or maybe you spoke too soon.
you can feel both of his hands move down to your behind, holding them there like he would if he was carrying you. in feigned annoyance, your lips purse a bit, not that he'd be able to see it anyway. "that's my butt."
itadori giggles, almost sounding snarky in nature. "mhm. your butt." he gives it a light squeeze in emphasis, before starting to rub it with his thumbs. the action is so simple, yet to you it feels so... intimate, loving. in a way that sends a little heat to your cheeks with a red hue that would definitely be visible.
but of course, you let it slide.
there's a few moments of silence that pass, and you're left almost thinking he fell asleep. but his gentle words soon break it, and his one of his hands finds yours, gripping lightly. "i love you... a lot..." he mumbles again, but the words are a lot more clearer this time, and a lot more sincere. a common practice of his that he does right before he drifts off to sleep.
"i love you too. a lot." you whisper back, shuffling as close as you can get to him.
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rynwritesreid · 8 months ago
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I like the way you kiss me| Spencer Reid
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A/N: So, I haven’t written smut in a good while, but I hope this okay. It’s defo romantic, but I promise soon there will be some good angst.
Summary: Spencer is nervous about being in a relationship with you, because of what his friends would think and the age gap you two had. But when it comes down to it, all that matters to him, is you.
Content: Smut 18+. Fluff. Fem!reader. Use of nicknames (just princess). oral(R!receiving). PinV.
Masterlist| request are open| navigation
Spencer Reid knew dating you was playing with fire. You were younger, and you had never been in a serious relationship. Spencer knew if his friends found out about the two of you, he would never hear the end of it. But when he was with you, he didn’t care, all he could think about was you. 
He couldn't resist the way your eyes lit up when you talked about anything you loved, or how your pupils dilated when you were looking at him, or how you laughed when he told any joke.  He was infatuated with you, although he knew he should never have got attached to you.
But despite the risks, Spencer couldn't deny the pull he felt towards you. As he watched you across the table, he couldn't help but smile at the way you crinkled your nose when you were deep in thought. Your passion for life was infectious, and he found himself getting lost in the sparkle of your eyes.
Maybe he loved you, or maybe he loved the idea of you, but he didn’t care. He enjoyed been around someone who saw life as colourful and bright, rather than how he saw it and how the majority of everyone he knew saw it. 
But if Spencer was to ever admit what he truly liked about you, he enjoyed the way you kissed him. How every kiss you gave him was memorable. He could tell with every kiss you missed him when he wasn’t around, you cared about him and that he was the last person you thought about as you drifted asleep.
As the night grew late and the restaurant began to empty, Spencer realised he couldn't keep pretending that what they had was just a casual fling. He needed to admit to himself that he was falling for you, hard and fast. The way your hand felt in his, the sound of your laughter filling his ears, it was all too much to ignore.
"I can't keep pretending that you don't mean everything to me," Spencer whispered, his voice barely above a breath. “You make life worth living. Whenever I see your name flash across my screen, or every time I remember your face, I want to kiss you.”
“Spencer Reid as romantic, who could have imagined.” You chuckled, you felt the same way, but you could never put it into such words. “I feel the same way. I want to be yours.” 
“You’ll always be mine. You are perfect for me, and I am, well perfect for you.” Spencer pressed a soft kiss to your lips, feeling the weight of his confession lifting off his shoulders. In that moment, surrounded by the fading chatter of the restaurant and the gentle glow of the streetlights outside, Spencer knew that he had found something rare and precious with you. As your fingers intertwined with his, he couldn't help but smile, a genuine, unguarded expression of happiness spreading across his face.
*
Spencer flagged down a taxi, he couldn’t wait to get you home. The taxi pulled up to the curb, and Spencer held the door open for you, a small smile playing on his lips. The city lights glimmered in your eyes as you settled into the backseat, his hand finding yours instinctively. The ride home was filled with comfortable silence, the air crackling with unspoken words and promises.
Once the taxi had arrived outside his apartment, he leaped out and open the door for you. “A real gentleman you’ve got there.” The taxi driver smiled, giving you a knowing look as you stepped out onto the sidewalk. Spencer chuckled softly, a hint of colour rising to his cheeks at the driver's comment. Escorting you up to his apartment, he couldn't shake the feeling of contentment that settled over him like a warm blanket.
Once you were in the comfort of his apartment, he grabbed your face and pulled it closer to his. He gazed into your eyes, seeing a reflection of his own desires and emotions staring back at him. Without uttering a single word, he closed the distance between your lips, kissing you with a fervour that spoke volumes about the depth of his feelings for you. In that moment, nothing else in the world mattered to Spencer except for the connection he shared with you.
As the kiss deepened, a wave of passion and longing swept over the both of you, enveloping you in a cocoon of warmth and desire. Spencer's hands moved gently to cup your face, his thumb stroking your cheek tenderly as if to reassure himself that you were real and not just a figment of his imagination.
Maybe it was out of instinct, but Spencer moved his hands down the back of your dress and felt the smooth fabric beneath his fingertips. His fingers found the top of the zipper and he slowly started pulling down, while his mouth found its way to your neck.
Your breath caught in your throat as his lips brushed against your skin, leaving a trail of tingling sensations in their wake. “You are beyond beautiful.” Spencer gently whispered against your skin; his breath warm against your neck.
Spencer's fingers traced a delicate path along your spine as he slowly lowered the zipper of your dress, his touch felt like feathers dancing along your skin. Every nerve in your body felt alive and electrified under his gentle caress, and you couldn't suppress the soft gasp that escaped your lips.
His lips found yours once more, the kiss deep and hungry, filled with a raw intensity that threatened to consume you both. Lost in the heady rush of desire, you tangled your fingers in his hair, pulling him closer as if trying to fuse your very souls together.
Spencer was never the kind of man to hurry into get you naked, he liked taking it slowly, savouring every moment and committing it to memory. His hands moved with purpose, but also with a tenderness that spoke volumes about the depth of his feelings for you. As the dress slipped off your shoulders and pooled at your feet, Spencer's eyes roamed over your exposed skin, drinking in every curve and contour as if committing them to memory.
“I don’t how I ever got so lucky.” His voice was barely above a whisper, his eyes filled with a mixture of adoration and desire. Spencer guided you towards the bed, his eyes never leaving yours. In the soft glow of the moonlight filtering through the curtains, tonight felt more romantic, more intimate.
Spencer gently laid you on his bed, his gaze never wavering from yours. The room was imbued with a sense of intimacy and affection, as if every object bore witness to the love shared between you and Spencer. His fingers traced delicate patterns across your skin.
Though Spencer was still fully clothed, you didn’t feel vulnerable, you felt loved and adored. You felt as if Spencer was your biggest fan. But Spencer, been the gentleman he is, wasn’t going to allow you to be the only one naked. He unbuttoned his shirt slowly, revealing the expanse of his chest as he shed the fabric, every movement deliberate and filled with a silent promise.
As his shirt fell to the floor, Spencer lowered himself onto the bed beside you, his body radiating heat and a quiet intensity. His mouth left a trail of kissed down your body, igniting a trail of fire along your skin as he worshipped every inch of you with his lips and tongue. Each touch was a testament to his adoration, a silent vow of devotion that echoed through the room.
His lips started moving down your body, his lips finding your nipples and gently sucking them, his tongue flicking over them. But they weren’t the centre of his focus, because if Spencer was one thing, he was giving. He loved hearing you moan for him, how you complete surrendered yourself to him. He enjoyed knowing he had ruined anyone else for you, because he knew you the best, he knew what made you squirm. He wasn’t usually the type of man who wanted to ‘own’ something, but you were different. He had always wanted you for himself, even if at the start he was nervous.
His hands moved lower, caressing your hips, your thighs, his fingers dipping into you, the warmth of your body accepting him wholeheartedly. He felt you tremble under his touch, your body responding to his every move, and he felt a surge of power and desire within him.
Your breathing quickened, every gasp and moan a testament to the pleasure that was building within you. Spencer's eyes met yours, the fire in your eyes mirrored in his own. He knew then that this was more than just a physical connection, it was a soul-deep bond that took his breath away.
He paused, the tip of his finger hovering over your sensitive spot, teasing you. You knew what you wanted, and you could tell that Spencer knew it too. He smiled, a warm and genuine smile that made your heart flutter.
"Please," you said, your voice barely above a whisper.
“Please, what princess?” Spencer teasingly asked, stroking your inner thigh with his fingers.
You swallowed hard; your desperation clear in your eyes.
“Use your words.” He insisted, his gaze never leaving yours.
“I need you,” you whispered hoarsely, your cheeks flushing with embarrassment.
His lips were soon on your clit, his tongue plunging inside you, tasting you, exploring you. Your body arched beneath him, a silent plea for him to keep going, to never stop. And he obliged, his tongue darting in and out of you, his fingers working in perfect rhythm, driving you higher and higher until you finally shattered apart underneath him. You came with a cry, your body convulsing beneath his, and he felt the wave of your release wash over him, taking him to a place of pure ecstasy.
As your body relaxed, he pulled away, his eyes never leaving yours, his face a picture of pure satisfaction. He moved up beside you, his hands steadily exploring your body, his lips brushing against the sensitive skin of your neck.
But Spencer was far from done. He knew exactly what you needed; he could read your body like an open book.
Spencer slowly slid inside you, feeling the walls of your body cling to him like a force of nature. He moved slowly at first, savouring every moment of the connection that flowed between them. Your body arched towards him, eager to feel him deep inside, seeking the completion of a desire that had been building for so long.
As he thrust deeper, Spencer's eyes locked onto yours, the intensity of the moment making your heart race and your breath quicken. You wrapped your legs around him, pulling him closer, your body craving the warmth and connection.
He picked up the pace, each stroke more fervent than the last, the sounds of your breath and his groans filling the room. The air was thick with desire and the scent of your arousal, heightening the passion between you.
Your hips met his with each thrust, matching his rhythm and pulling him deeper into you. Every movement felt more intense, every touch more electric. In that moment, you and Spencer became one, moving as one, feeling as one.
Your fingers dug into his back, pulling him closer, every sensation heightening, every touch becoming more intense. Spencer's breathing was ragged, mirroring yours. The room was alive with the sound of your bodies moving in a primal dance, lost in each other's eyes.
Your breathing became higher pitched, signalling your orgasm was coming. You arched your back, your head falling back as you screamed his name. Spencer felt the walls of your pussy clenching tighter around him, and he knew that he was going to cum too.
He thrust harder, feeling the heat of your body engulfing him, taking him over the edge. His orgasm was explosive, shooting wave after wave of pleasure through his body. He held you close, his lips pressed against your neck, his breath still ragged with desire.
Spencer collapsed beside you, his chest heaving, his face flushed with exertion and desire. You lay there, breathing heavily, your bodies still connected. Spencer gently stroked your hair, his expression filled with love and affection. "You are my everything," he whispered, his voice hoarse with emotion. “And I can’t wait to tell the world about you.”
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wileys-russo · 8 months ago
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I had a cute idea I wanted to share because I love the way you write!! Leah has back to back interviews from home and reader is sat on the sofa just watching her, falling more and more in love with how passionate her girl is. Leah gets all blushy and a bit flustered by the gaze. Just a cute fluffy one x
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lock down II l.williamson
"-and then i've got another over zoom with sky sports at three and i should be done for the day." your girlfriend sighed, already tired by her day before it had even begun.
"no rest for the wicked huh?" you hummed, still laid down in bed as the blonde restlessly paced back and forth across the room. "god then i've gotta fit in our gym program too! do you mind if we do it tonight? i know we're not supposed to but that at least gives me a few hours in between." leah groaned in realization.
"leah breath! of course i don't mind babe, its more enjoyable when we do the program together anyway. i'm more than sure we can push it back a few hours and it shouldn't affect the stats too much." you assured her gently as the blonde nodded.
"so much for lock down! everyone's watching bloody netflix and making tiktoks but noo im memorizing scripts and listening to the same witty one liner over and over about how hard it must be to 'work from home' as a footballer." leah mocked, falling backwards onto the bed with a huff.
"but is it?" you questioned as she sat up slightly and turned her head to be able to see you. "is it what?" leah asked with a confused frown. "is it hard to work from home as a footballer?" you questioned with a frown of your own.
one which quickly turned into a grin as your girlfriend lunged at you, ducking your head under the covers as her bony fingers poked and prodded at you, your safety blanket ripped away as the blonde hovered over you.
"you think you're so fucking funny." leah rolled her eyes as your grin grew. "well one of us has to have a sense of humor in this relationship baby, you're not called captain grumpy for nothing." you teased, tapping your lips expectantly.
"cheeky girl." leah tutted but none the less gave into your request, pressing her lips to yours as your hands moved to tangle in her hair, deepening the kiss as she settled on top of you.
but no sooner did the taller girl slip her tongue into your mouth, hands gliding slowly up your bare stomach, did her alarm go off.
"why!" leah pulled away and groaned moodily, flopping down and burying her face in your neck making you chuckle and gently scratch your nails against her scalp as you tapped snooze.
"babe this isn't making me anymore inclined to get up." your girlfriend mumbled against your skin making you smile. "what if i promise to make breakfast and have it ready for when your first interviews done?" you whispered into her hair, squirming as the girl sighed.
"might be working a little." leah admitted making you laugh and press a kiss to her cheek. "mm and what if i make your favorite breakfast?" you hummed, still rhythmically scratching at her scalp.
"the williamson special?" she questioned, the words muffled into your neck but you laughed again. "the williamson special. an omelette with ham, cheese and not a single spec of colour, flavour or vegetables." you teased, squealing as she pinched your hip but pulled her head up.
"you promised not to mock my eating habits." the older girl frowned with a pout that you quickly kissed away. "no i promised not to mock them last week, todays monday. brand new day of opportunity!" you grinned, pushing her hands away where they tickled at the sliver of skin where your shirt had rode up.
"first my speech impediment and now my diet. you really are a wicked awful woman!" leah sighed with a shake of her head as you scoffed.
"my love we've been over this. you don't have a speech impediment, you're just from milton keynes." you whispered against her lips, pulling away right before they could press against hers, pushing her off of you and moving to stand with a stretch.
"now my beloved MK, you're going the right way for the silent treatment missy." leah pointed at you with a glare as you oohed sarcastically. "tempting. is that a promise?" you winked, laughing as she lurched forward and grabbed the back of your top tugging you back down into bed.
"you are very lucky you're cute." your girlfriend tutted from above you, shaking her head. "and you're very lucky i'm so patient." you poked at her nose with an amused smile as leah gasped in mock offence, your girlfriend nothing if not the expert at annoying you.
"you wait for the third one and you won't have time to shower lee." you warned, pushing her fringe out of her face with a soft smile as she leaned over you to tap stop on the second alarm on her phone and looked down at you with a cheeky grin.
"in that case, wanna save some water?"
~
you were trying to concentrate on your own laptop, you really were.
in the spirit of having nothing better to do locked away in your home you'd signed up for an online accounting course, with leah already studying a much higher qualification in the same field she'd been a massive help.
but why would you waste your time looking at tax brackets and finance breakdowns when you could stare at your incredibly fit gorgeous girlfriend who was sat only a few metres away in your direct eyeline.
you smiled at how she threw and flailed her hands about as she spoke, always one to speak expressively and passionately as she was recounting a story from her childhood when she'd played on a boys team and was relentlessly pushed about for being 'just too good'.
it was one of the first things that had you falling deeply for the older girl, how passionate she was. not just about football but with anything she put her mind and heart to, including how fiercely she loved.
not just how she loved you, but how she loved her family, loved football, loved her friends, the girl could be a handful and a stubborn headache at times but nobody could deny that she was also one of the most sincere and loving human beings you'd ever met.
so with that in mind you sighed quietly, a dopey smile on your face as you pined over her like a lovesick puppy, something the pair of you were often teased about by your team mates but it just washed over you like water off a ducks back, both of you far too loved up in your little bubble to pay it any mind.
in fact without leah you were certain you'd have long lost your mind amid this pandemic, the blonde finding little ways every day to make you still feel so special or to have you smile or laugh, two things which rapidly became her favorite reward.
just yesterday she'd woken you up with breakfast in bed and a bunch of flowers just because.
granted she did order the breakfast from a local cafe which was still operating for delivery and you couldn't prove it but you were near certain that she'd stolen the flowers from some of your neighbors front yards on her morning walk.
regardless you were touched by the thoughtful gesture and showered her with sweet kisses as a thank you, even if leah did eat nearly all of your breakfast much to your amusement given it was hardly up to her usual bland unseasoned standards.
you leaned back a little more into the sofa and crossed your legs underneath you, balancing your laptop on a cushion on your lap, a soft smile plastered permanently into your features.
once or twice leah caught your eyes staring over the top of her own laptop, sending you a small grin or a subtle wink before her attention returned back to the interviewer.
you heard him say that the next game would be a drawing one, sliding your laptop away and hurrying to grab a notebook and pen, placing them beside leah who mouthed her thanks as you took a seat across from her at the dining table.
leah gave you a questioning look as you did so but you merely shrugged, gesturing for her to pay attention as she tuned back into the interview. you watched as she was told to draw her wembley stadium, competing against the interviewer.
you smiled as you took her in, the way her eyebrows furrowed in concentration, nostrils flaring in annoyance every now and then as she was unhappy with a stroke of her pen, a small puff of air exhaled from the corner of her mouth as the tip of her tongue pushed out the other side.
you took a photo of her and smiled, placing your phone back down and resting your chin on your hand. leah could feel your stare on her and as she revealed her drawing and you grinned as the tips of her ears and cheeks flushed red.
"stop!" she mouthed at you as you shook your head, still staring at her in admiration as her attention switched back to the interview. finally after what felt like hours of your gaze pinned to her leah was able to wrap it up, saying her goodbyes and clicking end call on the zoom, pushing her laptop closed.
"what?" you smiled innocently as the blonde sat back in her chair and shook her head at you. "you have a staring problem!" she accused with a point as you gasped and held a hand to your chest.
"i do not. i wasn't staring, i was admiring!" you clarified as leah hummed, her chair pushing back with a scrape. "cheeky." leah clicked her tongue as you followed after her to the kitchen, kissing her still slightly pink cheek with a smile as she grabbed a juice out from the fridge.
"leah!" you scoffed as you held your hand out for it to take a mouthful and she slapped her palm against yours with a wink.
last one, sorry babe." the blonde smirked as your mouth formed a small o. "those are mine!" you protested, rushing around the counter and trying to snatch it off her as she pushed you away effortlessly with one hand and downed the juice with the other.
"you are so unbel-" you started to tell her off as she exhaled happily and tossed the empty bottle into the recyling bin with a happy whoop as it landed. "no no wait, let me guess." her finger smushed against your lips silencing you as she stroked her chin as if deep in thought.
"unbelievably sexy?" silence. "no? okay. unbelievably charming?" silence again. "wrong again? mmm unbelievably intelligent?" more silence. "wow thought i had it there. unbelievably-" you wrenched her hand away at that and shook your head.
"unbelievably infuriating!" you rolled your eyes as leah smacked her forehead with a scoff. "that was my next guess!" she tutted with a shake of her head as you sighed, a small smile tugging at the corner of your mouth.
"hey hey don't get all stroppy. there's still three more in there i was only teasing." leah grabbed your waist and pulled your shorter form into her, a noise of surprise leaving your mouth as her hands hooked under your thighs and she hoisted you up to sit on the counter as she settled between your legs.
"how about the williamson special right now?" leah smiled, thumb tracing your bottom lip as you gave her a look of slight confusion. "you want another omelette?" you questioned as your girlfriend shook her head.
"no no baby girl, the real williamson special." leah rasped, hands toying with the waistband of your sweats as you caught onto what she was suggesting.
"mmm and whats that? my memory needs a jog." you hummed, a smile settling onto your own face as the girl leaned in, minty breath fanning your face as her lips were millimeters from yours.
"mind blowingly passionate sex with a guaranteed happy ending, and then-" your eyes fluttered closed as she moved to kiss at your neck, lips trailing from your jaw down to the column of your throat, biting softly before she moved to tug at the lobe of your ear.
"-then we eat potato smileys in bed naked and watch the golf." leah exhaled as you moaned playfully.
"god i love it when you talk dirty to me."
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noira-l · 3 months ago
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𝐌𝐨𝐦𝐞𝐧𝐭 𝐨𝐟 𝐇𝐞𝐚𝐭
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⋆ ★ '𝐘𝐞𝐚𝐫𝐬 𝐭𝐨 𝐜𝐨𝐦𝐞' - 𝐬𝐞𝐫𝐢𝐞𝐬
chapter summary: you woke up, realising how handsome "your husband" is, it made you hot.
pairing: gojo satoru x f!sorcerer reader
warnings: really suggestive, swearing, description of the body, mention of male anatomy, reader is really kinda horny.
author's note: well, I'm ovulating, I'm (not) sorry.
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Okey, what the fuck.
“Morning.” Satoru yawns, stretching. He sits down on the bed back to you. He lifts his arms up, tensing every muscle on this occasion. You watch as his back tips up, showing the years of work he has put into each of his training. You can see a pair of bright pink scars, on his pearly skin, that haven't exactly healed from all the fights he's had.
You followed his sizable hands with your eyes, down to his broad shoulders and a slight taper at the waist, which led lower…
Wait, what are you doing?
Did you just bite your lip? Looking at HIM?
Well, you wanted to slap yourself to get your senses back. Which, as it turns out, you did, unconsciously, because Satoru turned his head slightly toward you, with a smile at which, if you had been standing, your knees would have bent.
“You okay?” one eyebrow raised in a questioning gesture, smile widened, eyes sparkling with a beautiful radiance, profile appeared breathtaking. His gaze slid over your body. You got shivers.
“Yes!” you said it quite loudly, grunted "Good morning.’" you tried to smile as you always do. Although you are sure that your lip trembled.
You ran away with your gaze unable to look at him longer.
He rose energetically from the mattress and walked over to the wardrobe, still with his back to you. You clenched your fists on the blanket. In this angle, his silhouette looked even better, the light coming into the room created shadows on his body that accentuated every bit of his sculpted features. As if he was a sculpture, made by God to be admired, and you fell into a trap when your gaze landed on him.
You unintentionally watched his snowy hair, his broad shoulders, his hands that had just opened his wardrobe and… only now did you see how low his shorts hung on his hips, exposing protruding hip bones.
Oh shit.
He looked so good. His body looked so… delicious.
You were reminded of how sometimes those same bones poke into your back when you're sleeping. And sometimes, wanting to move away from them, you'll rub against something else, you always ignore it..
But...
Occasionally, when your shirt rises a little, you are able to feel his sculpted belly, the warm skin on your back making you shiver on contact. The hot, sweet breath on your neck that was intoxicating and his hands on your waist, holding you close to his hips.
You clenched your thighs together and swallowed nervously. You woke up in just such a position. Pressed tightly against something poking from his shorts. To something that felt hot and hard to you. Something that promised to give you pleasure when you lost yourself in it.
It would be enough, if maybe you just returned his barely existing rubbing against your ass. It would have been enough, if you'd lifted your leg hooking over his hip, opened yourself to him. It would have been enough, if you just said his name, with the lust you now feel inside.
You shake your head. Come on, what are you thinking.
"Hmm…" hummed. He turned to face you with two t-shirts in his hands "I don't know if I should wore white or blue, what do you think?" he looked quite thoughtful, as he alternately applied both colours to his body for you to see.
You think about how someone can have an eight-pack. And why is it him. Your gaze slid across your shirtsleeves and down his belly, to hips and to the barely visible line of white hair that led to…
You started to feel hot.
It wasn't the first time you'd woken up to such a sight, you knew the male anatomy and it had never do anything to you. So why now can you swear you're drooling at the sight of it?
You didn't hear him call you, at all. Mind still too focused on how his muscles lined up on his body, and what they would be like when you really touch them. He put both shirts back on the bedside table.
You let out a surprised sigh, so quiet, almost imperceptible, as he crawled on the bed towards you. Sizable hands moved across the bedding, showing how beautifully they could clench on you. You followed him with your eyes, breathing began to be uneven.
"Sweetie." his closeness and nickname brought warmth to your cheeks. He was so close. Close enough that you could feel his breath. Your gaze wandered to his pretty lips, pink, plump, just begging to be tasted. You could feel yourself beginning to tremble, like your body was on fire.
Please, do something...
"White or Blue?" crystal eyes gazing into yours. Glittering centres shimmered and turned in his half-closed eyes from sleeping. A face decorated with a slight smile, warm to your response.
Please..
"White." muttered, somehow swallowing nerowly the gulp that had appeared in your throat.
The smile only grew bigger. Revealing toothy grin, which often made you irresistible to him.
"I felt that way too, heh." he got up from the bed, taking this t-shirt and putting the other one away in the wardrobe.
You need to run. Now.
You got out of bed, walking over to the dresser to get your things, wanting to change in the bathroom. Legs felt soft and trembbling, heart beating very hard, breath uneven. Managed to get everything ready.
Just as you were about to grab the door handle you heard next to you
"E~? Where you going? I still need help with my pants too." could hear his smile in that statement.
You shut the door loud, hiding how much your cheeks burned with heat.
★ --
Bathroom, you were leaning over the sink trying to calm your breathing. Washing your face, tried to scrub away the red that had appeared on your cheeks. Eyes still glossy, as you looked at yourself.
What is happening to you today?
When changing clothes, you knew you had to change your underwear. You sighed defeted, noticing how soaked you were there.
When was the last time you were so wet?
You glanced down at yourself, cheeks red, sensitive nipples poking out of your shirt, body shaking very softly.
You were pulling off your shirt, trying to change your clothes, as if that would make you not feel so dirty. You started looking for your bra, only to realise that you had left it on the dresser. You have to go back there. In this condition? To him?
Panic. You clutched at your hair nervously.
If he caught you in that state, you couldn't refuse, if he started touching you. You couldn't help it, if he flashed you a smile, said a few affectionate words and grabbed you by the hips again.
Screw it.
You burst into the room, with your arms crossed over your chest. You were confused. He wasn't in the kitchen either. Had he left? You called out to him. Silence answered you. Did he really leave without breakfast? Did he oversleep again?
You hid your face in your hands, thanking the heavens that they had mercy on you today. You don't even want to start thinking where you get these thoughts from, about him, and other things.
You glanced at the clock. It's still quite early, still time left before the kids should be up. You could still feel the pulsation between your legs, gaze wandered to the bed.
It was probably time to take care of yourself.
You still have a moment, right?
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© noira-l 2024 | all rights reserved. do not copy, translate, modify, or redistirbute my work without permission
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tl: @kalopsia-flaneur
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minami-ff · 1 year ago
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I Want My Kids to Have Your Eyes
Levi x Reader (fluff, sfw)
what a bold thing to say to your captain.
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Moonlight hung over the hill like a comforting blanket as you both reclined an arm’s length apart on the soft grass beneath, bodies sinking into the earth. The day had been relentless, a gruelling mission that tested every ounce of strength. Now, in the quiet aftermath, you two found solace gazing upward at the summit’s view, shimmering like scattered diamonds against the canvas of the night sky.
The shared stillness remained comfortable, before you posed a soft interruption to the quietude, "Captain, do you ever think about your future?"
Levi's eyes briefly left the constellations above, attention shifting to you. "Yes, it usually ranges from the next second to the next few months. Which area of land outside the walls to explore, how defensive operations should alter for the next month, which day certain intelligen-”
“Captain-” You interrupted, then hesitated, the vulnerability of the topic making your heart race. "I meant a peaceful future, like having a family, kids?"
Levi's brow furrowed slightly. The thought of it was unfamiliar, impossible. "In this war? That’s far-fetched," he remarked, gaze returning to the stars.
A subtle smile grew on your lips as scenarios played at the back of your mind. "I know, of course, but don’t you ever imagine it? A life after the war, a future where Titans are just stories we tell our children." Levi's expression softened, a fleeting hint of wistfulness in his eyes.
"Like sometimes I think if I had children, I’d take them to play by the oceans, make adorable lunch sets," you continued, "how beautiful they would look if they had your eyes…" Embarrassment started flushing up as you realised you rambled on way too far.
His eyes widened imperceptibly, caught completely off guard by your comment.
"WAIT, that didn’t come out right. I didn’t mean having them with YOU, of course... definitely not…" You trailed off, a splash of pink painfully obvious on your cheeks. Get yourself together y/n, what on earth are you saying to your captain?
“Ouch.” A flicker of disappointment crossed his features. Levi cleared his throat, seemingly caught in the unexpected turn of the conversation. "Well aren’t you very in objection to that idea." he snickered, hiding a trace of sorrow beneath his face.
“Nevermind, I’m sorry, please forget what I said." You apologised in the tense atmosphere.
But Levi didn't dismiss it. Instead, his mind seemingly remained lost in contemplation. "How will your children have my eyes, if they don't have my genetics?" Determined to disprove your faulty reasoning.
You chuckled nervously, "I just mean I hope they’ll be a pretty colour, and delicate shape, like yours."
Levi displayed a rare vulnerability in his expression. He had never given thought to the aesthetic of his eyes; they were simply a part of him, a feature he never considered noteworthy. This was the first time he had received a compliment about them, and it left him momentarily speechless.
"At this rate, my most optimistic guesstimate is that I’ll be slaying titans till I’m 60." You broke the awkwardness joking, "in that case I might not be able to have kids, doubt any man would still take my crinkled self on a date anyway."
"Why not?" Levi replied seriously, his voice a soft echo in the tranquil night. "I won't be even a tiny bit surprised if you're still this beautiful at 85."
A blood-bathed blush adorned your complexion, stomach filling with butterflies and warmth, brain connections zapping around - wondering if he really thought that way, or,
“you’re just saying that.”
Levi sighed, “in all your years of knowing me, when have I ever felt obliged to tell a white lie, Comrade?”
"Right…” You muttered, with all sorts of thoughts doing laps beneath your skull, trying to continue the conversation as level-headed as possible. “Perhaps I'll meet my first love at 99,” a giggle escaping your breath as you joked.
Unexpectedly, Levi's response carried a weight that belied the casual banter. "Well. I think people can be in love without being in a formal relationship. You could easily have your first love now."
Your gaze laid upon his side profile, slightly puzzled by his logic, "but how can you be in love with someone without holding hands, saying mushy things, and all that?"
His head turned towards you, a moment of silence filling the air with eyes drilling into yours, revealing a sincerity that tugged at your heart. "I definitely can."
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lcriedlastnight · 5 months ago
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Hi :)
Is this the request? :
Friends to lovers with Lando and him being absolutely love sick, mesmerised with reader and one time it's just them two together and he says "For my sanity, we should start dating."
anon. i am literally in love with you. thank you soooooo much. mwah!!
tw: fem! reader, swears, lando’s first win, lmk if you want me to add anything.
w/c: 1.6k
the paddock was bustling, the heat was sweltering. after lando's horrible sprint race, everyone on his team was desperate to make today's race go well. they'd gotten the brit his favourite pre-race snack, given him extra blankets and pillows for his drivers room couch, they'd even gotten oscar to agree to not complain about how loud lando's pre- race playlist was! but the one thing (person) that could actually calm lando down and get him into the racing mindset was nowhere to be seen.
you'd been in the cafeteria, lando begging you to come to states for this race, he had told you that there was a feeling in his gut that this race was going to be great. so you braved the miami heat, just for him. just like each and every time you came to a race. you did actually believe that this race would be special, you shared that gut feeling with lando, so you'd begged your boss for time off and told your lecturer that it was a family members wedding in miami that you just found out you were invited to. you didn't really try hard on the excuse for your lecturer, knowing he didn't care less if you were there or not, just as long as you had submitted all the assignments that were due.
so that's why you were sitting at a table in the cafeteria, with your phone on do not disturb and you headphones in blasting your studying playlist in your ears, typing away on your computer. you didn't know that everyone was looking for you. it's not like you were that well hidden anyways, you were just sitting in the corner of the cafeteria and the motor home wasn't that big. it certainly wasn't big enough to lose someone when there was ten plus people searching for them.
you don't notice one of lando's engineers sitting at the opposite side of the table, as you try your best to finish your essay before the race starts. you do, however feel about seven light taps on the table that makes you pull your eyes from the laptop screen in front of you. you pull your left ear free from the music coming through your headphones.
"hi?" you say, looking at the man. you didn't know who he was, just that he was an engineer.
"everyone is looking for you." he tells you, a little frantic. this worries you.
"what? why? what's wrong?" you ask him, not sure if he knew what was wrong or if he was just the messenger.
"dunno." well that answers that. "lando's been asking for you for the past hour and a half. he's been saying it's urgent." your eyebrows raise in concern. you quickly close your laptop and slide your headphone around your neck. you slip out the chair, thanking the engineer, and heading to lando's driver room.
you knock a few times before just opening the door. the sight you see almost makes you burst out laughing. lando is in his fireproofs, you can see the peak of papaya from underneath the multiple blankets on top of him. there must be about seven on top of him, all of them varying in colour and patterns. lando was practically buried under the weight of them all, stuck to the couch. oscar stood at one end of the couch, you suppose he was the one to blame for this, although this could be the work of lando himself. either way you didn't really know what this was supposed achieve.
"what is going on?" you ask after assessing the situation they had both gotten lando into. "i'm really confused right now." you smile though, the scene still hilarious looking.
"we couldn't find you anywhere and lando needed you." oscar explains, although all it does is leave you more confused than when you first walked in. in what way were you the same as seven blankets?
"right. makes sense. seeing as i am seven blankets. i can see how this would help." you tease them, sarcasm dripping from your words as you lay your laptop, phone and headphones on the nearby table.
oscar rolls his eyes, while yours flit to lando who stays quiet to let oscar explain. you swear you could see a hint of red on his cheeks but you don't get enough time to see if it actually is, in fact blush because oscar is talking again and stealing your attention.
"well he told me that to get in the 'racing mindset' he gets you to lay on top of him and rest all of your weight on top of him so i thought putting blankets on top of him would simulate you laying on top of him!" oscar grins, like his idea is actually a good one. you feel like groaning at his dumbness. a part of you is taken aback that lando had told oscar about what he called his 'pre-race ritutal'.
"right well i'm here now, so why don't you go do your own race prep while i sort out whatever is going on here?" you suggest to oscar, he can tell it's not a suggestion though. so he does what he's told, wishing lando good luck on the track but before he closes the door behind him he whispers to you "and you think he doesn't like you like that? he quite literally needs you to lay on top of him to calm him down". you just sigh and walk over to the driver, once oscar is finally gone.
"what are you doing, stupid boy?" you ask, sitting by his feet on the couch. lando only staring back in response. you stare back until he responds.
"missed you?" he offers. this time you can't hold back your laugh. if your eyes were closed from the laughter you would see the way lando's light up at the sound of your laugh. the pride he felt to the one who made you laugh, it was better than any other feeling. once your laughter stops, you pull back the blankets. they actually didn't weigh much at all, which makes you wonder why lando was acting as if he was trapped under them.
"it's like oscar said, i needed you and literally no one could find you so i went to him for help. then he suggested that and i just went along with it." lando helps shrug off the blankets as he properly explains. the brunette ends up sitting next to you, eyes looking into yours.
it's your turn to explain. "i was trying to finish my essay before the race started, seeing as i won't have time tonight. we'll hopefully be going out afterwards." you explain your 'dissapearance’.
lando nod and hums then checks his phone, that was hidden in between blanket layers. it's almost time for him to go out to the garage and he's literally had no time with you at all. how was he supposed to race in these conditions?
"that's alright, love. guess we just need to make up for lost time right now." lando states, his hands grabbing yours and pulling you on top of him. lando's breaths instantly even out. you didn't know if he was panicking and getting in his head about the race or what it was, all you knew was that you laying on top of him, putting all of your weight on him was helping. and that's all you really wanted.
lando's breaths hit you neck at you run your fingers across the bridge of his nose. usually when you guys would do this before races, you would run your fingers through his hair, but his latest injury on the bridge of his nose made you want to run your fingers across his cut lightly. lando shudders but relaxes once your light movements continue. you both stay in that position until an alarm goes off on your phone, signalling at lando needs to be at the garage in five minutes (you always set two alarms because there's no way you're getting lando out of here on time). with the way lando jumps you think he must have been seconds away from falling asleep. he confirms it by muttering "stupid fucking alarm." as grumpily as ever.
"right lan, let's get you moving." you say reluctant as you move off of him. he whines like a child and his arms cling onto your hips to try and stop you. he uses no force so you stand up easily.
"for the sake of my sanity, we should start dating." lando mutters, if it was a decibel quieter, you don't think you would've hear him. but you did. you don't think it was meant for your ears, either judging by the drivers reaction to your "what?".
you can see the cogs turning in his mind, does he try and wrangle himself out of this or does he stand his ground and admit his feelings. he thinks for a second.
"i like you. you're driving me insane. please can i at least take you out on a date?" lando is not above begging, he will literally fall to his knees if it means you will accept his offer. before you can, the alarm goes off on your phone.
you smirk at him, an idea popping into your head. "win today and we'll go out on tuesday." you tell him. lando groans, his head falling onto your shoulder. "if i do you have to give me a winners kiss." lando bargains.
"deal".
safe to say, you never thought that yours and lando's first kiss would be on the parc ferme, after he's just won his first face. nor did you think you would have to be getting ready for a date with him two days later. safe to say that essay was not getting submitted on time.
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winged-self-indulgence · 5 months ago
Text
🔞 Ray x GN!Reader, because I have been neglecting my man. sorry sweetie 🔞
“You’re being a terrible kidnapper by the way.”
Ray tilts his head idly, a sardonic smiles tilting the left corner of his lips at your words. His smirk is playful and dangerous. Knowing.
You lift your chin in mocking defiance from the couch where he’d placed you. It’s probably not as intimidating as you’d hoped considering the ropes binding your arms behind your back. Your legs are free, but it’s not like you could go anywhere. Even if you could somehow manage to escape Ray, his lair (“Please don’t call it that, Star.”) was located on the topmost floor of the tallest apartment building for miles around.
He leans against the glass window-walls that look down onto an ocean of shimmering city lights. Flashes of purples, reds, and gold are blanketed by a moonlit black velvet. The colours reflect off the edges of his face, sharpening gorgeous features and softening others. A cigarette dangles loosely from between long fingers, trailing an almost invisible thread of smoke up to his lips.
Lips that are now stretched in the most self-satisfied smirk you've ever seen.
“You’re staring, Star,” Ray taunts. You snap your head to the side, cursing mentally. You’re hyper-aware of Ray’s tall form as he moves closer, not stopping until he’s standing over your seated form. His free hand reaches up to caress your jaw, knuckles brushing the apples of your cheek. The cigarette is gone, but the scent clings to his skin – somehow warm and enticing – and you can’t quite stifle the urge to lean into his touch.
Fingertips trace your skin, rough pads mapping every spot he had claimed and memorized countless times before.
"Explain yourself," he murmurs, tilting your head up so you’re forced to meet those unfathomably dark eyes. "How am I a bad kidnapper, Star?"
You open your mouth to reply, nothing coming to mind for several seconds. It's as if his gaze is a black hole sapping you of your usual sass and wit. "Um, w-well...well what do you think you should do with me?"
Ray kneels in front of you, which does nothing to make you feel any more in control of this situation. Body still tightly bound, you can do nothing other than pout and writhe in place when he leans closer, lips brushing against your heated cheek.
"Oh, that's an easy one," the villain murmurs into your ear before he gently bites your earlobe. You squeak, barely able to hear his next words through the rush of blood in your veins. "I’d keep you all for myself. Lock you away where no one can find you except me."
Huffing, you manage to regain a bit of your mental faculties and lift your chin with a playful scowl. "Hmph, don't villains usually use traps to keep their victims in place? Iron cages, steel chains, etc.? Come on, Mr. No. 1 Most Wanted Villain, where's the showmanship? Did watching Megamind teach you nothing?!"
A laugh escapes Ray at your demand, a burst of mirth that has you fighting back matching snickers. One hand slides up your arm and, and he pulls you closer until your chest is flush with his. The other grabs you by the waist, tipping you off balance and pinning you to the couch.
"How's this for showmanship, Star?" Ray scoffs as he rakes over your prone form with carnal amusement. His hand leaves your hip, dipping beneath your shirt before tracing upwards and taking the fabric with it. Your nipples pebble in the cool air, vulnerable beneath those void-black eyes.
You’ve gotten a taste of Ray’s possessiveness before – several times in fact – but it never fails to stun you, to send heat rushing between your thighs every time you catch a glimpse of that depthless stare. The lengths he’s gone, that he would go to, for you. Especially after having cast off the NAHA’s paper-thin restrictions.
Fear would be the normal response, the expected emotional outcome. Yet when callused fingers pinch your nipples all you can do is moan.
"So whiny, Star,” Ray coos against your chest, teasing and tasting your buds until they’re bruised and sore. You scream when his mouth closes over the right one, tongue laving over swollen stiff peaks. “And so loud. Is this what you want, hm? You want me to ruin you?"
You can’t speak. The only thing that leaves your throat are helpless, wordless sounds. Ray clicks his teeth, and his hand slides up, applying just the slightest bit of pressure on your throat. A warning.
"What’s that Star?” The villain queries, voice dripping with false curiosity. “Isn’t this what you like? To be helpless under me, in my control. All for my own selfish pleasure? Come on sweetheart, speak up."
“Y-You wish!” you kick out your feet, but Ray simply cants his head to the side and catches your flailing ankle. When he wedges himself firmly between your thighs and hooks your legs over his shoulder, you realize what a terrible mistake you’ve made.
"You little brat…" Ray pushes your ankle further up on his shoulder, restricting you even more as he smirks down at you with a gentle yet terrifying arrogance. It is the look of a wolf watching a caged rabbit, a predator contemplating what to do with cornered prey. Pressing his taller frame against you, Ray’s free hand moves to your hip where the pointer finger dips past the edge of your underwear. It’s barely a brush, and yet the sensation makes your head spin. “Do I have to force it out of you, Star?”
You stubbornly bite your bottom lip, and Ray let out a helpless sigh as if to say, you asked for this.
“Mmph, R-Ray!” The sound of flesh meeting flesh echoes in the room, desperate screams filling the air as you squirm and struggle to escape the steel-trap of Ray’s arms though you know it’s futile. “P-Please, m’sorry–!”
“If you’re so sorry, then stay still,” he grunts, punctuating his words with a harsh thrust, one hard enough to jolt the couch several inches across the floor. Your neck and chest are a canvas of bruises and bite marks. Drool falls from the corner of your lips, filthy and messy. The sight of you underneath him, teary-eyed and begging for mercy, was intoxicating and the ex-hero can’t stop the dangerous smile that crosses his face.
Your body convulses as another orgasm shakes through you, the fifth in the past hour, and Ray groans when you squeeze around his cock. He pulls out to admire the sticky mess between your thighs, cum glazing your puffy hole in a lewd display.
Just as you’re catching your breath, Ray pinches your chin and drags your gaze back to meet his. “Uh-uh, we’re not done Star,” his grin widens at your stricken expression. “I want a proper apology, sweetheart. Now open your mouth and say ah.”
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worldofkuro · 7 months ago
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Painted Smile
Painted Smile VII
<- Previous Chapter | Next Chapter ->
Pairing: Alastor x Female! Reader
Summary: You couldn't wait to meet new friends. What you didn't expect was this smiling little boy, only one year older than you, that would take such a big place in your life.
Notes: 4913 words... I don't know what happened. I'm so tired, it's 1 am but who cares, I needed to drop the new chapters. I really hope you'll enjoy it dears ! Tell me what you think of it! Because I'm dead tired there might have more mistake than usual, I'll check it out tomorrow.
“ And then I kind of kissed him through the blanket.”
You stared as Alice squealed with delight, bouncing on her seat in front of you. You were in your living room,sitting on your sofa, your Mother was out which made you alone with your friend. You just finished telling her what happened two days ago and she seemed delighted while you were… confused. At that moment you didn’t even think, you just… went for the kiss. It wasn’t even a kiss, your lips didn’t touch! You just felt the blanket!
“ And then ? And then ? Don’t leave me hanging, tell me what happened next!” begged Alice while she was squeezing a cushion against her chest. You turned your head toward the chimney’s fire. You were the 20th of December. Christmas was around the corner and then Alastor’s birthday…And you still didn’t have any ideas for a present ! You sighed, you were losing against the clock… “ Hey, are you doing alright ?”
“ Oh, sorry Alice, nothing happened after. He… reassured me and then he went home. But the problem right now is that I don’t have his Chrismas’s present… I don’t even have his birthday’s present!”
“ He was born on the first of January, right ?” You nodded and she tilted her head backward, thinking about a present for your friend. You almost scoffed, you trusted her but if YOU couldn’t find a present for Alastor, how could she do it? “ Hey, before I forget, I asked my parents if I could celebrate Chrismas’s Eve with friends and they said yes!” she clapped her hands together. “ You should come, and bring Alastor with you !”
Going to a soirée with Alastor..? You looked at Alice. She was indeed the daughter of a rich family but she wasn’t like those pompous people who thought they were better than anyone. She was open minded. She made friends with everyone, white people, coloured people, everyone.. And you were surprised her parents were okay with it. Maybe they weren’t closed minded people?
You kind of wanted to see Alastor in this kind of environment, you have never seen him all dressed up since you were kids. It could be fun ! But would he agree ? You could almost hear his voice saying he didn’t want to leave his Mother alone for Chrismas’s Eve.. You didn’t want to leave your mother alone either– Wait, that was it! You would invite Marie to pass Chrismas’s Eve with your Mother and you and Alastor would go to Alice’s soirée and then celebrated Christmas in your own house with Alastor and her mother!  
“ From your smile, I guess it is a yes?” asked Alice with a grin. You winked at her before standing up.
“ It’s a maybe… I don’t know if Alastor would want to come.”
“Mhn.. If he doesn’t want to come, tell him that John will be there.” she said with a teasing expression, like she knew something you didn’t. You raised an eyebrow at her, suspicious.
“ Alice… Did you talk with Alastor when he walked you home?”
“ Oh! Actually yes, he is the one who began to talk. He asked about our relationship, he seemed very protective of you, it was cute!” she beamed as she giggled. You blushed, looking away. “ But you think he would not like a party?  He seemed like he would be the star of the soirée!”
You did know that. Alastor has something that made people want to approach him. He was almost seventeen but he already had so much charisma, he was a proper gentleman. You weren’t blind, you could see more and more young ladies turn their eyes on him when you were walking outside. You wondered if he was aware of it? If he was, he never made a deal of it, he would just smile back at them if they happened to catch his eyes. 
You wondered how ladies would try to approach Alastor. You’ve known him for eight years, so you weren’t impressed by him anymore, if you wanted you would just jump on his back because you were tired and he would carry you home just like. No questions asked. You smiled without noticing, people might have found Alastor difficult to approached but for you, it was as easy as breathing.
You kind of wanted to see people trying to approach Alastor now…
“ Well, I just have to convince Alastor.”
~~
“ I’ll be delighted!”
You blinked, turning your head toward him. He was laying on the tree’s foot, seeming to be reading a book as you were sitting on the swing. It was snowing today, but you both decided to stay outside for a change. The forest was pretty hidden under a white blanket.
You went to Alastor’s house after parting ways with Alice. You did pay attention to the people around, but you didn’t see any man that would be stalking you. You were sure, if there was a stalker, that he would stalk Alice, not you. But Alastor has made you promise that you would pay attention so…
“ Really? You would like to come?” you smiled as you let the swing go, walking toward him. He put his book down and looked up at you with his usual grin, he really seemed excited about it! 
“ Of course dear, going to a soirée with you holding on to my arm? How could I refuse? And I’m sure my Mother would be delighted to celebrate Christmas’s Eve with your mother, as long as we celebrate Christmas with them.” he sketched before sitting up. He tilted his head and you couldn’t help but laugh as you saw a few leaves and snow on his hair. You sat next to him and began to take the leaves out of his hair. In two seconds, Alastor was laying back down on the grass but this time his head was on your thighs. He took his book back and continued his reading as you stroked his hair, looking at the sky.
What kind of dress would you wear? You never went to a soirée before, you needed to look your best, you wanted to impress Alastor. You’ve never really put too much thought into what you wore, you’ll have to ask Alice for advice… You wondered how Alastor was going to show up..
“ Alastor, what are you going to wear?” you looked at him, still playing with his hair, how could his hair be so soft to the touch? He didn’t move his gaze from the book, answering you with a teasing smile.
“ Why? ”
“ Come on, I was just wondering… I don’t know what kind of dress would suit me, I have never been to a fancy soirée. I’m scared of being… underdressed. “ and you didn’t want Alastor to be ashamed of you because of your poor choice of outfit. He stayed silent for a minute and then tilted his head backward on your laps so he could stare into your gaze.
“ Red suits you.” 
You stared in his eyes, the sun made them look almost caramel like. He was so lucky to be this handsome, really ,and he wasn’t even a full grown man yet. You pouted, looking away. How unfair.
“ Well, thank you, does that mean that the only color that suits me is red and I look awful with any other color?” 
“ Oh I didn’t say that. I just want to see you in red.”
You looked at him and couldn’t help the smile sketching your lips. Well, if that’s what he wanted. You took his book off his hands, which he let you do, still looking at you. You put the book next to you, on the grass. 
“ Do you think you'll be able to keep up with me if we have to dance ?” you teased him, raising an eyebrow. His eyes widened before he roared with laughter, holding his belly. You chuckled at his reaction, you knew that Alastor was an amazing dancer, you just wanted to hear him laugh… 
“ Oh my dearest friend, if we happen to dance, trust me, I’ll make it so you wouldn’t be able to walk for some days.” he winked at you with a confident smile. You laughed out loud, throwing your head back.
“ And I’ll make it so you wouldn’t ever consider another partner!” he took your hand in his with a soft smile, caressing your skin. You looked up as you heard someone coming and your eyes met Marie’s. She smiled softly at you, saying it was time for you to go home, she didn’t like you going home at night and didn't want you to catch a cold.
Alastor stood up, before taking his book. You stood up with his help, said goodbye to Marie’s and went back home with Alastor. Since the “stalker” evenement, he didn’t want you to walk home alone. You rolled your eyes at him but at least you could stay with Alastor a little while longer, so it was worth it. You walked together on the road of New Orleans, watching at the shop vitrines if it could give you some ideas for Alastor’s gift.
“ Hey, Alasto-”
You screamed as your foot slid on ice. You felt yourself falling before Alastor wrapped his arms around you and tugged your body against him before gracefully dancing around the freezed road. You stared at him, your eyes wide opened as he made you spin on the freezing floor, but you never fell, he was moving your body, like it was another part of him. You began to laugh happily. You let him take control of your body, letting him make you dance as he wished. Not too long after he made you drop, your head almost touching the ground. You stared at him as he held you firmly, your breath coming in short puff. He was staring intensely at you with a satisfied smile.
“ No matter what, I’ll always catch you if you fall.”
You smiled at him as he straightened you before offering his arm to you. You took it, as you kept walking toward your home and of course, as always, he leaned in to give you a kiss on your forehead before leaving. You stared at him until you couldn’t see him anymore and then you decided to enter your home.
“ Mom~ What would you think about celebrating Christmas’ Eve with Marie~?”
~~~
“ This is a disaster Alice !” 
You fell on your bed,head in your pillow ready to scream bloody murder. You haven’t found a single red dress that suited you. You hated every single dress you had tried ! And Alice’s soirée was tomorrow night ! You didn’t know what to do with your hair, with your makeup and you still didn’t have anything to wear ! 
“ I see… Well, it seems like it’s my time to shine ! Look what I’ve got you !” She took a bag from behind her and put it in front of your bed. You lifted your head from your pillow and opened the bag. Your eyes opened as you saw a beautiful black and red flapper dress. Your eyes were wide open, you’ve only seen this kind of dress with the riches folks. You stared at Alice, your mouth wide open without being able to put words together. “ I know you will look delicious like this, come on, try it on so we can find makeup and hairstyle to go with it!”
“ We can see my legs !”
“ We’ll wear stockings, don’t worry ! It’s almost 1920’s, come on!”
“ We’ll be in 1917 next month!”
“ That’s what I said, come on now!”
You undressed yourself before looking at the dress. It was very pretty and it was shining with so many sparkles… You dressed up and put on some heels and then you looked at yourself in the mirror. You looked… like a woman. You really liked the dress… you moved around a bit, it was comfortable, you feel like you could dance with it! You could feel the flapper moving against your thighs with each movement. You blushed a little and looked at Alice who was staring at you with stars in her eyes.
“ Ooh, yes! You’ll look perfect ! Don’t worry, I’ll have some similar dress, you’ll not feel left out! Now, the makeup and the hairstyle my friend~.”
Oh dear.
~~~
It was the day. You were in front of your mirror. You were wearing your dress, your black heels, you had put a red lipstick on your lips and a bit of mascara. You were so nervous. What if Alastor found you absolutely ridiculous ? Oh you couldn’t live with the humiliation. You heard your door open and turned around to see your mother, staring at you with teary eyes.
“ Oh sweetheart, you look… Breathtaking, your father would be crying…” She went into your bedroom and hugged you which you immediately reciprocated. 
“ I don’t look stupid ?”
“ Baby, no. You look like a grown woman! Oh, how time flies…you're already sixteen...” she smiled before you heard someone ringing at your door making you tense. It was Alastor, you were sure of it. Your Mother smiled at you before winking and then she left you bedroom, going downstairs so she could open the door. You tried to hear what they were saying but you couldn’t hear anything…
You looked at yourself one last time in the mirror.
“ Come on girl. You’re going to an amazing soirée and you’ll enjoy every single second of it, okay?” you nodded at your reflection. Great.
You sighed and then left your bedroom. You took a deep breath and then began to walk down the stairs, your heels making noises against the wooden stairs. You heard Alastor and Marie’s voice getting closer. You saw your mother at the bottom of the stairs with an encouraging smile. 
“ Alastor, come closer, there she is !”
You heard his shoes before finally seeing him.
Oh.
He was beautiful.
His dark hair was slicked back, he didn’t have his glasses on, he was wearing a dark redded suit and he was holding a bouquet of flowers in his right hand. He was staring at you, his eyes wide open. You both stood there, without talking or doing anything else. You took a shaky breath before walking down the stairs until you were in front of him, thanks to your heels you were face to face with him. He was still staring at you with a straining smile. Did he find you ridiculous, did you try too hard? You kissed him softly on both cheeks and you heard him gulp. What was happening to him?
“ Alastor, please say something…” you begged, looking down.
You felt his hand on your face, raising your chin up so he could meet your gaze. His smile was softer and his eyes still had this intense glint that made you relax.
“ I told you, red is our color.” he smirked before giving you the bouquet. You grinned as you stared at the beautiful flowers in front of you and then you looked at Alastor’s eyes. He didn’t even once let his gaze move away from you, it made you feel warm. You smiled brightly as your mother took the flowers from you, putting it in a vase. 
“ You both are so beautiful, but leaving before being late !” Marie said just after taking a picture of you. You took a long coat that hid your figure before leaving with your arm around Alastor’s one. 
“ I can’t wait to be there ! “ you said excitedly. You were still feeling nervous but Alastor by your side, it was getting easier to just be excited about this party. You felt Alastor grip your arm tighter as you walked into a busy road. You tried not to bump into people, and after a thirty minute walk, you find yourself in front of a huge house. Was it a mansion?
You knocked on the huge door and a butler opened the door, eyeing suspiciously but before you could even your mouth you saw Alice running toward you. She was wearing an outfit similar to yours, as promised, but hers was white and blue. She looked almost angelic.
“ You made it ! Come, come, come inside!” 
You walked into a huge reception room and there were already so many people inside. The butler took off your coat making you feel a little cold, so you just stayed against Alastor who put his arms around your shoulder. Alice introduced some of her friends, you could not remember every name, there were too many. Did Alice really know all of them? Some of them looked like real adults, and was that a band that was getting ready? You went with Alastor toward the buffet.
“ Well, what do you think of it so far?” you asked him with a tired smile. He took a drink and sniffed it before putting it back. “ What?”
“ Be careful, some of the brevage have alcohol,” he said before leaning against the wall.” but I’m not surprised. Your friend seems to be the type to always go big.  Being able to pull off this kind of soirée with a war going on? I’m almost impressed.” he said before straightening his tie. 
“ Alastor, is it you?”
You turned to the voice and saw a beautiful lady. She smiled sweetly at Alastor who gave her his usual smile. Who was she? She began to talk with Alastor, ignoring your presence. You tilted your head, it was the first time someone came straight at Alastor with you next to him. She seemed so confident, you almost envied her. Almost. You were a polite girl, you wouldn’t interrupt them but you didn’t want to stand next to them too long, it would get boring quickly. You took a drink from the buffet and sipped it. It was sweet, you wondered what it was. You smirked, you could already imagine Alastor’s face at the disgustingly sweet brevage you just had.
You should prank him. You took another cup and turned toward Alastor before being startled by the band who began to play music. You almost dropped the cup, that was a close call.. You looked at Alastor who was being dragged by the lady toward the dancefloor. 
Wait what? 
You stared at the scene in front of you, as Alastor began to dance with her.
What?
“ Oh, who do we kill before Christmas?” You turned your head toward Alice who was trying to see what you were watching. “ Oh… Oh, yes. Jealous?”
“ No! I’m just .. surprised. I didn’t know Alastor had other female friends.. Come on, let’s dance.” you finished your drink and dragged Alice who eagerly nodded. 
You both danced with each other, smiling. It was fun! The band was playing some good tunes! She gave you a spin who landed you into someone's arms. You looked up and saw John, your school’s mate.
“ You look beautiful like this…” he said as he admired you. You nodded with a confident smile. You didn’t know why but you felt like the most powerful woman right now! He smiled at you, before looking away shyly. “ Care to bless me with a dance?” You laughed, so formal. You took his hand and danced with him, keeping your eyes open to match his steps. You did stop him from lifting you in the air though, you didn’t trust him to keep you up in the air but thankfully he didn’t take it badly.
You took a look at Alastor and couldn’t help but frown. He was dancing amazingly, as always, spinning the woman before tugging her against him. You pouted, you thought he only did that with you.
As the party kept going you were getting more and more agitated. Why was Alastor still not dancing with you? You didn’t know why, but most of the time you were a good girl but when Alastor was included, you could become the worst brat ever. You walked toward the buffet, took another drink and went toward the band, you needed to look confident. You spoke to the singer and he smiled before making some place for you. He placed the microphone in front of you and asked you what song you wanted to sing.
You smirked and asked for a song you and Alastor’s used to dance on when you were younger. You were watching the crowd, took a deep breath and began to sing. You stared at Alastor who was dancing with another girl but once he heard your voice he turned his head toward the scene , where you were standing. You couldn’t feel but something in your belly, just like that his attention was back on you. You saw the girl trying to keep his gaze on her and you smirked. Not today.
Today you were selfish.
You sang like there was no tomorrow, the crowd clapping their hands with the rhythm of the song, you didn’t think you ever sang this good. You had perfect control on your voice, you were even dancing on the stage as the band were giving their all with you. You looked at Alastor who was still dancing with the lady, even if you could see he was getting bored. Well, you could help. You began to sing with more energy, the band making the rhythm faster as well. You could feel your lips sketched into a mocking smile as you saw the girl not being able to keep up with Alastor. Perfect.
You went down the stage , still singing. The crowd parted for you and you couldn’t help but feel excited. You walked toward Alastor, he had his back on you. You slided your hand on his back making him flinch. He turned his head toward you with a surprised expression. You grinned at him, singing before smoothly taking Alastor away from the girl. You both were encircled by the crowd but you didn’t care. Alastor and you danced, never breaking eye contact. You kept the rhythm as fast as you could, every step was nailed, every spin. You would have your back against his chest and then he would spin you so your face was inches away from each other. And then Alastor lifted you in his arms before throwing you in the air. You closed your eyes, feeling perfectly safe. He promised he would always catch you if you were to fall.
You fell down in his arms, your head near the floor but never touching it. You felt his breath on your lips and you opened your eyes, staring right back into his gaze. He was sweating and so were you. You were holding his shoulder, breathing hard. You were both alone in your own world. 
And just like that, the spell broke as the crowd cheered for you. You blinked and Alastor straightened you up with a genuine smile. You grinned at him before you both bowed to the crowd. You went back to the stage, giving back the microphone before going to the buffet, you needed some fresh water.
“ Oh my Lord, you both were.. I don’t even have the words!” squealed Alice as she shook you by the shoulders. You laughed at her reaction , it was just you being petty because Alastor wasn’t paying attention to you.
“It really was amazing.” John said as he clapped while you were drinking a glass of water.
“ That’s what happens when you let us do our things together, let that be a lesson folks.”  Alastor said as he put his arms around your shoulders.  You nudged him but couldn’t contain your laughter. You were having a great time.
You had other dances with Alastor, before people were making little group. You were sitting on a table with Alice,John,Alastor and other people you dind’t know. You didn’t know why, maybe they drank some alcohol but the conversation which was proper began to turn toward something more… spicy?
“ You’ve never kissed before? Hoho, you don’t know what you are missing.” said a lady to John who just blushed. The lady stared languidly at Alastor. “ And you, pretty boy? Have you ever kissed someone ?”  You were ready to tell the lady to back off, you didn’t want her to embarrass Alastor because he didn’t have his first kiss.
“ Yes, I have.”
Huh?
“ Oh, I’m not surprised. And you sweetie?” you felt everyone's eyes on you and you blushed. Even Alice had already kissed someone !
“ N-no, I have never.”
“ Well, why not remedy it tonight, just before Christmas ! John, was it, why don’t you kiss our adorable singer right here?” you flushed even more as John was looking at you, seeming hesitant. 
“ As if my dearest friend’s first kiss would be with such a boring fella, no offense my friend.” said Alastor sarcastly.  You frowned, why would he care! He already had his first kiss and he didn’t even tell you. You stood up.
“ I need some air, I’ll be back.”
You took a sip of your glass with the sweet juice and went out, in the garden. You heels hit the paving stone as you try not to burst out of… of what? sadness? angryness? You sighed as you stared at the stars in the sky, you felt the snow falling on your naked arms. You could even see the air you were breathing.
“ You are going to catch a cold.”
You turned your head toward Alastor as he took off his blazer, ready to hand it to you. You shook your head.
“ No, I needed… I need the cold air.”
“ Why did you lie ?”
“ Pardon?” you turned your body toward him as he took a step toward you.
“ About your first kiss.”
“ I didn’t lie, I’ve never kissed anyone. And unlike you, if I did, I would have told you but Mister Alastor doesn’t care to share such a secret with me, am I right?” you crossed your arms over your chest. He smiled at you mockingly. You felt anger sweltering inside you.
“ Don’t you dare look at me like that, Alastor.”
“ You’ve always been endearingly stupid. My first kiss was with you, in your room, remember ?” he tilted his head as he took another step toward you.
You felt your body relaxed. You couldn’t be angry with him. He didn’t know. He wasn’t reading the same book as you. You have been so embarrassed when he had catched you reading a love story but at least you knew what a first kiss was! 
“ Alastor, a kiss isn’t… A first kiss is something you must share with a special someone. Your lips need to touch the other one.” you blushed as you looked away. “ I think.. Th-The lips need to move against each other an-and..”
You took a step back but his hand found the back of your waist as he softly tugged you against him. You knew he was trying to find your eyes but you were so embarrassed by what you just told him.
“ So, a first kiss must be with a special someone, right?” he waited for you to nod before raising your chin with his finger. “ Then, can I give you my real first kiss?” You stared at him with your eyes wide open, your cheeks flushed red.
“ What..”
“ You are my most special person since childhood… For me, it’s only natural for you to have my first kiss.” he smiled at you, his eyes shining with that oh so familiar glint you were used to seeing each time he was looking at you. “ You don’t have to if you don’t want of course, but–”
“ I want to. You.. You are also my .. most special person…” he nodded with a soft genuine smile that made you feel warm inside. You closed your eyes as you waited for him to kiss you.
“ Nu-uh, keep your eyes on me.” you opened your eyes, blushing furiously.
“ You are supposed to close your eyes when you are kissing someone !”
“ I don’t really care, this is our first kiss, we’ll do it how we want.” he smirked as he approached his face toward you. Your eyes were looking at his lips then his eyes, you couldn't focus on something, you were stressed, you were nervous, you were excited. Your eyes were half closed when you felt his warm lips against your cold one. You looked at his eyes, his gaze piercing your gaze with an intensity too much to bear, you closed your eyes.
It wasn’t like in the book but you didn’t know why, you didn’t care. 
You kept your eyes closed as Alastor stepped back slightly , you could still feel his breath against your mouth. You opened your eyes and gave him a shy smile as he whispered.
“ So dear, have you ever kissed someone ?” you nodded. “ With whom?”
“ Alastor.”
“ How was it?”
“ Perfect.” you smiled at him as he grinned at you before covering your shoulder with his blaze. 
“ Come on now, the soirée needs its stars !”
Tag List: lukneetoonz @martinys-world @littlepoetnova @sirens-and-moonflowers @eris-norwega @tiredflame132 @mo-0-o @vvollerie @boogiemansbitch @sodavizz @tessemerick @slytherin4ever @kammsinn @alastorssimp
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elliexmylove · 1 year ago
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✮˚。⋆ferns and moths⋆。˚✮
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ellie x f!reader
sinopse: you colour in ellie's tattoo while hanging out which leads to something more
cw: making out, swearing , heavily implied smut, confession
i hate this ngl
☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆
the alarm clock beside your bed went off at six am waking you up for what would usually be patrol, the shifts had been recently changed so jesse replaced you. the day was free to you now so you stretched and sprawled out over your bed after turning the alarm off, for the next three hours you slept soundly.
a soft knock on your door woke you slightly, you only turn on your side, now being more comfortable than ever. the knock was louder the second time but not enough for you to really care in your sleepy daze.
knocking for a third time the person clearly did not care if you were sleeping as they banged on your door with their fist, "fuck." you mumbled, pushing yourself up onto your elbow taking a minute to open your eyes. eventually throwing the blankets off of yourself you were met with a chill, the person banged on the door again and continued as you strode to the source of sound.
the door swung open with force as you stood about to greet the person with annoyance, and ellie stood there, fist mid air, about to hit the door again. her eyes widened for a second in surprise until her eyes took you in, cosy plaid pyjamas, hair messy and tired eyes filled with irritation. a small smirk went unnoticed by you,
"hey,"
"morning," you rub your eyes and blink a few times, ellie crosses her arms in the cold,
"i knocked three times,"
"i'm aware."
"what the fuck! it's freezing out here,"
you look at the grey hoodie she's wearing,
"maybe you should have thought about wearing something warmer,"
"i thought you would let me in quicker,"
"why would you assume that."
"i dunno, cause you care about me or whatever,"
you raise your eyebrows with an expressionless face, staring at her,
"yeah okay, come in." you finally decide.
you now notice the snow softly falling outside.
"oh my bad." you laugh
ellie shuts the door behind her and walks to your bed as you're already sitting down, "what's up?" you ask as she takes her shoes off and sits on the bed with her legs crossed getting comfortable,
"i dunno, i thought we could hang out cause we don't have patrol today."
"yeah i just thought we would both sleep in first."
"we can, i just wanted to spend time with you."
you nod with a smile and get back under the covers, ellie does the same, as you get comfortable and stretch your arms above your head, resting them there, "sorry bro i'm just really tired,"
ellie's hand falls onto your face as she lies next to you with her eyes closed letting you know it's okay and to shut up because she's tired too.
you start to fall asleep again almost instantly until ellies body sprawls across your bed, taking up almost all of the space and you groan, "get on your side of the bed." you kick her under the blankets, she softly smiles but doesn't move.
after drifting to sleep again your head turns to the side, squinting to see the time, only thirty minutes had passed, ellie's legs were tangled with yours and there was no space on the bed for you, your mind wandered to pushing her off the bed and you found yourself smiling evilly at the satisfaction in your mind.
while you were picturing shaking her back and forth her head turned toward you, eyes closed and fast asleep. you turned toward her, oxygen no longer filling your lungs as much as it should while your breathing slowed to almost a stop.
her eyes looked so peaceful and pretty as she slept, your eyes dragged down her face to her lips, slightly chapped from not drinking enough water, which you were also guilty of. one strand of hair lay across her freckled skin, before you knew it your fingers tucked it behind her ear leading you to almost choke on your own spit as her beautiful eyes slowly opened, her face lit up in a soft smile.
shiiit you'd hit that
beside you ellie sat up cracking her back and neck, your hands held your cheeks feeling how warm they were. "you slept for long enough now?"
"yeah."
"wanna do something or?"
"sure, you wanna sketch again or something?" i'm cool with just listening to music."
she shrugs and frowns in thought, "yeah, you got a sketchbook or something i can use?"
without saying anything you get off the bed on your way to get the paper and your walkman, ellie reaches over to smack your ass,
"ellie." You groan in frustration as she chuckles amused.
skimming through the pages of your sketchbook filled with doodles you make sure there's a clear page for ellie to use, you'll probably colour in her drawings because you can, so the colouring pencils that have been hiding under your bed for months are about to be disturbed. you pick up the walkman from the table and bend down to look under your bed, seeing the pencils in a container, along with markers.
the bed bounces after you jump on it and you reach your arms out as if to calm the movement,
ellie takes the sketchbook from you and gently smacks you on the head with it, your instincts kick in as you hit her arm, in return you get punched in your arm twice making you wince but only getting you more riled up, ellie gets tackled onto the bed letting you hear her beautiful laugh, she wraps her arms around you tightly as your body fights to get out of the tight grip, the need to beat her up is strong but she's stronger.
Your teeth sink into her arm as you bite her, "ow! what the fuck!" she half laughs in surprise letting you go, she looks at the clearly visible teeth marks in her arm. you then notice her tattoo and look to your markers, a plan made in your mind.
"el can i colour in your tattoo?"
"no! you just bit my arm."
"i've done it before so like, what's the issue here exactly."
she chuckles and nods, "yeah sure." granting permission.
no time was wasted as you begun colouring in, bent down to her arm focusing intently, one of your hands holding her arm in place while the other was carefully colouring the fern dark green.
she stared down at you not planning to look away, your hand on her arm made her feel something deep in her stomach. your breath fanned gently across her skin and her gaze burned holes through your head, the mood quickly changing.
your hand accidentally smudged the ink outside the edge, "shit sorry," you apologise, "you good or do you want me to stop?" once you look up your met with her eyes fixed on you.
"don't stop."
you frown slightly confused at her tone but continue anyway.
your hand gently grips her arm again, she looks at your hair and begins to play with it with her free hand, twirling it around her finger. "what're doing?" you murmur,
"playing with your hair." she said softly
"it feels nice."
"yeah?"
you were careful next to the outline of the fern, making sure not to colour outside the lines in the last bit, sitting up and shuffling over ellie quickly lifted her hand out of your hair unhappily
"dude."
"what? i'm just getting a different colour for the moth, i didn't think you enjoyed playing with my hair that much." you laughed getting a brown marker.
once back in position you looked at ellie who was already staring at you, your eyes glanced down to her lips for a second then focused back on her eyes.
"fuck."
your body heated up slightly, the situation seeming different now. ellie's eyes glared at you relentlessly and without realising it, you licked your lips as they suddenly felt dry, ellie now stared at your lips after you unknowingly drew her attention to them.
silence filled the air and your body grew very hot, you inched closer and her eyes flickered back to yours, "what're you doing?" she said lowly, you felt your stomach flip as you stared directly into her eyes.
"you do know i really fucking like you right?"
"aw. that's so sweet."
her voice alone made your stomach twist into knots.
the silence became agonizing and you didn't know what to do, after a moment she seemed to recognize what you were feeling and stopped teasing,
"i like you too,"
"i really, really like you." she breathed out leaning and crawling on top of you, those words were an understatement for the both of you, you two had liked each other two years ago this was way more than that now.
you sighed as you felt one of her hands rest behind your neck and the other gently cup your cheek, your lips moved together slowly, ellies tongue slid across your lip asking for permission to which to opened your mouth for her, the slow kiss turned into gentle urgency.
minutes went by making you pull away for air, keeping close to her face, the soft feel of her breath fanning over your lips.
"i've wanted to do that for so fucking long y/n."
"really?" You smile sweetly at her confession,
"yeah," she breathes out mirroring your smile
"and i wanna do it more."
she straddles you, tucking the strand of hair behind her ear as she looks down at you. taking no longer than a minute to admire you she answers your silent plea and leans down to kiss you.
a small moan slips out before you can stop it when ellie accidentally moves on you, her eyes widening,
"sorry i didn't mean to-"
"shh, shut up."
"ahh ellie what're you doing?"
ellies lips are now on your neck, making you sigh. "is this okay?"
"yeah- mmphfuck,"
ellie bit down, you lean your head back giving her better access and closing your eyes, she softly licks over the bite to soothe it.
you move under her rubbing against her jeans making her curse quietly, "can i uhm, take your pants off?" she looks at your face carefully, looking for any signs of discomfort. "yeah okay." You smile and lean up to kiss her, "you're sure?" she breaks away to ask, "it's okay if you're not ready i don't wanna rush anything i just-"
"ellie, i want to."
she looked at you unconvinced,
"i don't wanna just fuck you, i want to be with you."
you nearly passed out, giggling internally and kicking your feet,
"i wanna do both."
she raises her eyebrows at you, surprised at your confidence.
"then let's do both."
you lifted yourself half off the bed assisting her in taking your pyjama pants off, she stared seemingly out of it for a second then licked her lips and placed them on yours, hand reaching down under your underwear.
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reidmoony-toast · 2 months ago
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Strawberry Wine. ౨ৎ
"If I was empty space, and you were a formless shape we'd fit"
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Spencer x fem singer!reader
The two times they miss each other, and the one time they don't
content: no use of y/n, fluff, pining galore
cw: lil suggestive? (She sings Chappell Roan)
wc: 2.4k
an: I've been cooking this up for a while, but life has been super busy, so I haven't yet finished the other parts. I'm very sorry if they take a few weeks to finish :[ Anyways, hope you enjoy! <3
| pt.1 | pt.2 | pt.3 | series masterlist ౨ৎ
· · ──────────── ·𖥸· ──────────── · ·
He really wished he wasn’t here. He never should have begrudgingly agreed to Penelope’s crazy plans, no matter how much she bugged him about it. This was about as far opposite to his kind of thing that you could get.
The lights were bright–unbearably so; flashing so much he feared he would have an epileptic episode (if it weren’t for the small fact that he didn’t actually have epilepsy, but he digressed).
The large room was also deafening, filled with fans, all of them buzzing in anticipation. Penelope was not an exception–she bounced up and down like a rogue ball, shrieking in excitement close to every thirty seconds. He would know. He had been counting.
Although he would rather be at the very back (if he had to choose anywhere in this wretched place), Penny had physically forced him into the very front row, only a barrier separating them from the stage.
He didn’t know and definitely didn’t want to know how Penelope had acquired such tickets and at such short notice before the show. He had found that he was better living in ignorance of the borderline illegal habits of his best friend.
He had just endured half an hour of what Penny had called the ‘openers’. He was dismayed to hear that the performance was not the actual concert; he learnt that the hard way when he had asked Penelope if they could leave, which she replied to with a cackle, stating that the band that had just exited the stage was, in fact, not the main event of the evening.
He had buried his face in his hands and let out a loud groan. He only had himself to blame for being caught up in the ‘Garcia puppy eyes’ trap, but it didn’t mean he couldn’t whinge at least a little bit–or a lot bit.
He didn’t know much about this singer girl, only that Penelope was obsessed with her, bringing her up in conversation many a time. He admitted that he often didn’t fully (if at all) listen when Garcia gushed over her–he seemed to always zone out.
He had never properly heard her songs, only in passing when Penelope would blast music in her cave, and he didn’t even have a clue what she looked like.
He was mentally preparing himself for the next few gruelling hours, with Penny jumping up and down beside him, when the lights dimmed, sending the whole room into a frenzy.
He winced at the screaming and whooping coming from all around him. Smoke machines started emitting mist, covering the stage and fogging up the colourful lights. The crowd continued to roar, Penelope squealing next to him and gripping the railing of the barrier.
A figure emerged through the haze, the silhouette showing locks of hair cascading over their shoulders, clad in a silk slip dress that ended at the mid thigh, hugging their curves.
They started singing–a smooth, silky voice wrapped around him, making the room suddenly feel more bearable. He swallowed hard. The singing was beautiful. Sweet and rich, wrapping around him like a cosy blanket.
He raised his eyebrows with pleasant surprise. It was, admittedly, not bad in the slightest. He hated to say it, but he was enjoying it, a lot. More than he should, given that it was new-age pop, not the refined tones of classical music–his favourite genre by far.
All thoughts of music flew out of his head as the owner of the angelic voice stepped into the stage lights, allowing him to properly see her for the first time. His breath left his body as he took her in.
She was gorgeous, stunning–almost ethereal, as her other-worldy voice filled his cochlea, transmitting electrical signals through his nerve pathways to his primary auditory cortex.
Her hair shone in the light, giving her a halo of the highest grade, her bright lips curled into a perfect smile around her words, and her eyes shone with a million glinting stars.
He was utterly enamoured by her–every facial expression, every movement she made, every note she sang was all absorbed thoroughly by his wide eyes.
In no time at all, the first song was over, finishing with loud cheering and clapping from the audience. The angel grinned out at the sea of fans, soaking up the feeling.
Unlike Spencer, she was well and truly in her element, looking as though there was not where else in the world she would rather be.
He gazed in open-mouthed awe at the way she floated effortlessly about the stage–and, of course, that breathtaking smile that scrunched her nose and revealed the prettiest dimples he had ever seen.
He was snapped back to reality with a sharp poke in the side from Penelope, centering his gravity away from the girl on stage and back to where he stood.
“What?” He said loudly, an exasperated look adorning his face as he tore his eyes back to his best friend. She was smirking at him, arms crossed in front of herself.
“You have such a thing for her, I’m surprised you're not drooling right now,” she answered mockingly. He scoffed, dismissing her words with a wave of his hands as he faced the stage again, not wanting to miss a moment of the show. He heard Garcia laugh deeply at his half-hearted denial.
All thoughts of Penelope soon left his mind as the heaven-sent saint started to sing again, striking chords in his heart at every note.
The song came and went again, and Spencer wished they would not go by so fast, so he could see her for as long as possible.
The next song started with a more upbeat track, and the angel laughed, running back down stage, scarily close to where Spencer stood. “She was a, Playboy, Brigitte Bardot,” she started to sing, “She showed me things, I didn't know.”
She stuck out her tongue playfully, shaking her hips, making the satin fabric hugging her curves sway.
“She did it right there, out on the deck,” she bit down on her bottom lip as Spencer’s face heated, realising what the song was about. “Put her canine teeth in the side of my neck.”
She gestured with her fingers to a spot on her neck, pretending as if her fingers were the teeth, tipping her head back with imaginary ecstasy. He swallowed heavily, face hot.
“I'm in the hallway waitin' for ya,” she sang, “Mini skirt and my go-go boots,” on those lyrics, she bent over, running her free hand from her heeled boots and up her legs, jutting her ass out.
Spencer’s mouth fell open in shock. He had never felt like this from only a few minutes of meeting someone, let alone just laying his eyes on them. This was completely out of the ordinary for him, and it left him reeling.
~☆~
Songs flitted by like the butterflies in his stomach, and his gaze was permanently fixated on the captivating women centre-stage. He couldn't tear his eyes away even if he tried–and he most definitely didn't.
A new song started, fading in with a catchy guitar riff, and the crowd went wild, sparking a wide smile on the angel’s face.
The drum beat started, and she strutted down the stage, tipping her head back and shaking her smooth curls out in the dim lights before she began to sing. “Midnight,” she dragged out the end of the word.
“Come and pick me up, no headlights,” she blew a kiss to the fans in front of her, winking as she made her way down the stage towards where Spencer was situated.
Penelope grasped his arm tighter and tighter as she neared, buttery voice washing over him.
“Watch us go ‘round and ‘round each time,” she stretched out the note, rolling her head to the side, eyes landing exactly where Spencer was standing. He froze, dumbstruck, as he locked eyes with her.
He gulped heavily as a cheeky grin adorned her face, soft lips framing perfectly white teeth. She straightened up, continuing the lyrics as she floated even closer to him, never breaking eye contact.
“You got that James Dean daydream look in your eye,” She knelt down on the stage in front of Spencer. His breathing stuttered as his gaze remained on her, utterly entranced.
“And I got that red lip classic thing that you like,” she dragged her thumb across her lip, singing to him through a happy, if not slightly teasing, smile.
“‘Cause we never go out of style, we never go out of style,” He could see her mouth curving around each syllable as she sang into the microphone, eyes still, somehow, on him.
He most definitely looked like an idiot in that moment, with his flushed cheeks and slack-jawed awe of the ethereal woman only a few feet away, but he didn't have it in himself to care.
She had seen him, and not only that, she had actually come over and sat, right there on the stage in front of him. No matter how much he tried to convince himself otherwise, she was–without question–looking, and singing, straight at him.
She leaned impossibly closer, leaving only a few inches between their two faces as she crooned the words into the microphone. His eyes flicked across the features of her face before they settled on her own.
Up close, they were mesmerising– long, thick lashes framed bright irises, sparkling with the light of the night sky– he could almost map out the constellations he knew off by heart from the incandescent twinkles in her eyes.
“You got that long hair, slicked back-” She moved her free hand to hover over the collar of Spencer's shirt, seemingly asking silent consent to touch him.
He shook out of his trance long enough to nod vigorously. She let out a short chuckle, grabbing his collar and carefully but firmly pulling him closer by his shirt. “-white T-shirt.”
His breath hitched as hers ghosted his lips with every exhale, noses almost touching, with hardly any room for the microphone as his heart raced impossibly faster.
“And I got that good girl faith and a tight little skirt.” At that, she pulled away, letting go of his collar as she leaned back to run her free hand over her skirt, smirking at Spencer and his flaming-red face.
“And when we go crashing down, we come back every time,” she repeats, still serenading him. “'Cause we never go out of style, we never go out of style!” She finally stood, winking and blowing a kiss at a thoroughly flustered Spencer as she strutted to another part of the stage.
Spencer stood there, dumbfounded. He couldn't believe she had not only noticed him, but also sang right to him. His shirt was crumpled from where she had gripped it, but he didn't dare fix it. If possible, he would never smooth the rumpled fabric if it meant he could have a reminder of her always.
A rough shake of his shoulder brought him back to the present, Penelope standing astonished next to him, incredulous smile playing on her lips and she all but shrieked in his ear–something along the lines of, ‘You're so lucky!’ and ‘You're so down bad!’.
He didn't pay her any mind, instead keeping his still-red face on her, and her only.
She wandered to different parts of the stage during the remainder of the song, but Spencer didn't miss the more-than-occasional glances she sent his way throughout the next few songs, smile growing each time they locked eyes.
When they did, he matched her smile with his own goofy grin, his heart feeling as if it was beating out of his chest, breathing becoming erratic as he clutched the railing with white knuckles.
~☆~
All too soon, the concert came to an end, accompanied by raucous applause from the crowd. He clapped like a mad thing too, finally understanding why her fans acted the way they did.
The version of him from two hours ago would have teased him relentlessly for this, but he didn't care. It was another completely different version of him, a version that had not yet laid his eyes on her.
It certainly felt like a life-altering moment in his existence. His being was now split into ‘before’ and ‘after’. Before and after her.
She waved and blew kisses enthusiastically as she made her way off stage. He deduced that she would have to walk right past Spencer to get there. He pathetically hoped she would look at him one last time–prayed she cared enough to seek him out once again.
Electricity jolted through his entire body, head to toe, as she locked eyes with Spencer when he was in her direct line of sight.
She gave him a wink and a little wave, biting her lip through a larger-than-life grin; he felt giddy, hand coming up in an awkward half-wave. He silently cursed himself for the stiltedness of his actions.
She, however, didn't have such qualms as she blew him an air kiss, giggling as she turned away, skipping the rest of the way off stage. The screaming continued as the heel of her shoe disappeared behind the side-stage curtain.
He felt oddly hollow as the venue lights came back on, signalling the end of the show. He kept staring at the spot where she had last been, silently hoping she would come back out and sing again. Look at him again.
He blinked hard, finally re-orienting himself, glancing around to see a few people staring at him, whispering to themselves.
They were talking about him–about his encounter. He turned away again, ducking his head as his cheeks burned again.
As quickly as they came, the stares went again, and his eyes flicked back to the stage again. He so badly wanted to meet her, talk to her, even just lay his eyes on her again. That would be enough.
Penelope cleared her throat next to him, and he hummed in response, still not looking away. She snorted. “Come on lover boy, time to leave.”
He turned his attention to see her nod in the direction of the exit.
He gazed back at that spot once more, heaving out a melancholy sigh, before turning away, heading towards the door.
“Yeah, let's go.”
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st4rychnine · 8 months ago
Text
Cheating Spree ★ Suguru Geto
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mature content!
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you can't feel anything anymore; the rain seems to have washed everything away. it soaks through your clothes, chilling you down to the bone, yet you don't care, you can't. you're done caring, you're tired. 
you sigh, finally pausing your long walk to look up at the darkened sky, pouring rain as if it was weeping for you.
then you realize. you're in front of gojo and geto's shared apartment. you gasp, sigh, and think… this was as good a time as any. despite the fact that you're literally a dripping wet mess, you're going to break up with satoru.
when you ring the doorbell, it's suguru that answers.
at a hulking five foot eleven, bulging muscles, obsidian eyes, and unending miles of dark hair, you swear on your life that suguru geto is the most attractive man you'd ever seen. and here he was, standing before you in nothing more than grey sweatpants. 
"you alright? why're you standing in the rain like that; wanna come in?" his voice is low, husky, sexy. you stammer while trying to answer.
"I– is…" you swallow, clear your throat. "Is satoru home? There's… something I'd like to… talk to him about. briefly." it takes everything in you to keep your eyes trained on his.
oh man. when you say the man was built like a Greek God, you meant it. but it was an awful time to thirst over your ex's best friend. even though he was leaning against the door frame without a single care in the world. even though you could clearly see that sexy trail of hair, stretching all the way from his lower abdomen and disappearing into his sweatpants.
holy fuck. 
suguru hums and meets your eyes, amusement dancing in the obsidian depths. then he shakes his head. "nah, I should be asking you that though. earlier, he told me that he was going on some bar date with you, so. unless…” then it dawns on him.
you thought you were behind feelings, but you couldn't stop the small twinge of pain in your chest that your boyfriend was away screwing other girls and lying to his best friend that he was out with you.
it sucked.
you blink at the news, then sigh, resigned. "alright. I'll… be on my way then."
just as you turn around, ready to leave, he stops you with a call of your name. "I don't think you should be out in this weather. come on in. you can stay the night."
you don't have the strength to disagree. 
in about fifteen minutes, you've settled on the couch in one of suguru's old shirts, swathed in blankets with a cup of steaming coffee warming your hands.
suguru's at the kitchen counter, whipping up something small for himself.
the coffee doesn't do it for you. you need something stronger; something to make you forget. "geto? do you happen to have any alcohol on you?”
“uh… I think so. should be somewhere,” he says, opening and closing a few cupboards until he hits the jackpot. he gets out a tall bottle, tinted a dark black, and pops it open. he pours the contents into two glasses, then turns around, hands you one filled with a bromine-coloured liquid.
you accept it gratefully, downing half the glass in a single gulp. 
it's liquid fire, leaving you wincing as it slides down your throat. liquid fire, but it tasted lovely. it had an orange-like flavour with a slightly bitter undertone. "it's nice." you say, and it's true.
suguru smiles. "I know – it's our most expensive." he takes a sip of his drink.  “you can sleep in Satoru's room. I don't think he'll be returning tonight.”
you shake your head, a pang striking your chest. “I'd rather sleep on the sofa.” you say matter-of-factly. 
he hums in response.  “you can take my bed then. i’ll take the sofa.” 
again, you shake your head, insisting on the sofa. the last thing you wanted to do was to make the poor guy uncomfortable. he's already being such a darling, helping out a brokenhearted girl. you didn't want to inconvenience him any further. 
but that's technically what you end up doing because he insists, and you're unable to argue. you down the rest of your drink and hold out your glass for another.
while refilling the glass, Suguru asks, “so… do you want to watch a movie?”
you don't say no.
you end up watching some stupid fucking horror movie, which left you practically trembling against suguru, covering your face and peeking between your fingers.
you hadn't expected it to be this scary. it was a movie that had always been on your to-watch list, and now, you absolutely regret choosing it. it's interesting, but definitely won't leave you with peace of mind for the next few days.
“sorry…” you murmur, voice pitched high and slurred from the alcohol. “I don't do well with horror movies.”
suguru laughs, eyes glued to the screen. “why’d you pick it, then?”
“I don't knowwwww!” you cry, flinching at a scene and covering your eyes. God knows you might share suguru’s bed with him tonight. no, not in that way. “i didn't know it was this scary!”
“it's not even that scary,” he says, still chuckling.
“yeah, maybe to you! we're sharing your bed!” you cling onto his arm, burying your face in his shirt.
“really?” he smirks, and your face burns at the implied meaning. “fine, but you've gotta watch it.”
you shake your head, no.
“please?” suguru asks, trying to pry your hands away from your face. they don't budge. “aw, come on! its only fun if we watch it together!”
“I'm not here to have fun!”
“but you should, regardless of your purpose.” he tries to pry your fingers away from your face, and finally, you give in.
the rest of the movie is spent with you clutching at Suguru for a dear life and screaming, especially when unnecessary. 
by the time the movie is over you're a mess, laughing with tears running down your face. “ne– never again!” you half-sob.
he pats your head. “don't worry, you did good. at least you enjoyed it, yeah?”
you sniff and turn away.
he calls your name. twice. you refuse to answer though, feigning mock anger. although he probably deserves it genuine after forcing you to watch that stupid fucking movie. its your fault though, technically. you shrug and scoff.
Suguru decides in that moment. he's going to fuck you. being honest, he's always wanted to. and now, he's got a chance. he'll take it. oh and, he wanted to piss satoru off. it was well deserved. so once more, he calls you. 
you turn to him, pupils blown wide in the reflected television light, lips wet. damn, he wanted those around his cock.
he shifts closer to you; your lips are almost touching. you have no idea when the energy around the two of you changed.
"you want revenge on Satoru, yeah? well, I've got a plan." he mummurs huskily, his lips brushing yours. 
"wh– what is it?"
"let me fuck you." then he smashes his lips on yours.
the kiss is unlike anything you've ever experienced before – with satoru or otherwise – and, oh boy, you loved it. your lips are pried open, your tongue dancing with his in the most sloppy, lewd kiss you've ever partaken in. 
you know it's wrong. I mean– you're technically cheating on your boyfriend, aren't you?
but even as the thought crosses your mind, you push it away. 
tit for tat.
his hands grip your waist, pulling you even closer to him as the kiss gets even filthier and filthier, then the two of you pull away.
you're left panting and gasping for breath and suguru, well, looks otherwise unaffected. but the growing erection in his grey sweatpants states otherwise.
"you accept?" you swear his voice grows an octave deeper. 
you need him so bad. "ye– yes…" you whisper. "yes sir."
his thumb strokes your cheek, and he presses another kiss to your lips. "I want you to suck my cock for me. would you do that?” he whispers against them. you nod.
your heart beats furiously, head dizzy as you find yourself on your knees. you feel like you're dreaming.
if you are, then it's a good one.
suguru loosens the ropes on his sweatpants and pulls the front down, just enough for his boner to pop out.
it's longer and thicker than anything you've ever seen; not that you'd seen that many anyway. but still. it's length was tremendous – you'd roughly estimated about ten inches, his girth about thee.
all in all, you don't think it'll fit. in your mouth or otherwise.
"you're staring like you're seeing something extraordinary.” suguru smiles
you're about to dish out a mildly disturbed ‘because it is!’ but you hold your tongue and give the tip an experimental lick to stop him, from saying anything else.
then you take a big breath and wet it with your saliva before taking the thing into your mouth. 
the thing is monstrous, the head barely fitting past your lips. you try as possible to keep your teeth away from it, opening your mouth wider than comfortable. tears bead in your eyes, trickling down your cheeks.
you get the head, then the first few inches. you try to work your tongue around it as much as possible; if there was any one thing you learned while with satoru, tongue action was key.
you're less than halfway – about three inches in – and the tip was already poking the back of your throat. you have no idea what to do except keep going. so you take the next two inches. 
the wet suckling noises you make, the tears that stream down your cheeks – they turn suguru on even more, his cock twitching in your mouth. he's literally a grown man, but watching you struggle to get down the sheer length and girth of him is doing things to him. he's a grown man, but he's about to blow his load already. it takes everything in him not to. "fuck– you're doing quite good. you've got a bit more to go."
that certainly gets you going. you squeeze your eyes shut and swallow around him, willing yourself to not choke. you swallow down the next three, whimpering lowly around him. tears prickle at your eyes and trail down your cheeks.
"almost there. come on. thats my girl – fu– yeah?" suguru's voice is audibly strained, his fingers clutching your hair. oh man, he's about to lose it. 
you force yourself down on the last two, your nose finally pressed against his pubes. you tremble, forcing yourself to not choke around it's girth.
you did it! but at what cost?
you open your eyes, looking up at him though your lashes. My guy looks like a Greek god; long black hair sticking to his forehead and the sides of his face and his neck, thick brows furrowed, dark black eyes endless and glossy, and god, he's so fucking fine.
you're dripping through your underwear.
he calls your name in what is almost a moan, gripping your hair in a fist. "shit – fuck, don't look at me like that–"
you hum through a mouthful of dick then shrug. like what?
maintaining eye contact, you pull your head backward, almost choking as his length retracts from your throat. you pull back halfway, then go down again, swallowing the half-length. 
you continue the movements, – retract, then swallow – slow and jerky at first, but eventually, you begin to build a steady pace.
saliva and precum leak out of your mouth, coating his cock with a transparent sheen and suguru groans above you, hands gripping your face as his hips fuck subtly into your mouth.
a mild, salty taste builds at the back of your throat as his precum leaks from the tip of his dick. you use your tongue to pleasure him as much as possible, your jaw aching.
“fuuuuck– agh– shit, that feels good. fuck–” suguru grunts and slips his cock out of your mouth, wetting your cheeks with a mixture of saliva and precum, and smearing your tears.
“wh–” you begin, voice cracking. you clear your throat and start again. “what's wrong?”
“fuck, I'm… if you keep that up, I'm gonna cum.” suguru whispers through breathy pants. 
he's so pretty, you stare for a bit before answering. “that's fine. if you don't cum down my throat, where will you cum?” the alcohol in your blood makes you bolder than usual. 
he makes a sound deep in his throat and slips his cock back into your mouth, gripping the sides of your head and making you take the whole thing fully.
“I'm… I'm gonna fuck your mouth,” he mumbles, strands of dark hair falling over his eyes. slowly, his hips fuck his cock into your mouth, in and out, smearing precum around inside your mouth. 
he gasps lowly with each thrust he makes into your mouth, abdominal muscles tensing as he does so. his eyes are half-lidded, cheeks damp with sweat. 
as the pleasure builds, his hips increase their pace, until his cock is entering and exiting your mouth so fast, you're almost gagging around him. his gasps turn to small groans, his fingers gripping your hair tighter to slam your face into his pubes with each upward thrust he makes.
you can feel how close he is – his cock dripping and twitching in your mouth. you need him to cum, before your jaw cracks open and falls to the floor. so you suck in your cheeks even more, creating a strong vacuum that, from experience, would make Satoru spill instantly. 
it works it's intended effect.
"holy fucking shii–t.” he takes extra care in pronouncing the t. “fuck, keep that up. fuck, im cumming.” he warns, and that, he does.
ropes and ropes of hot salt spill into your mouth, down your throat. you almost choke, try to pull away, but suguru holds you there, letting his cum flow down your throat. it's salty and thick, and more of an acquired taste if anything, but its not completely awful.
Suguru groans deep in his throat with each spurt of him down your throat, his head tilted back, thick hair cascading down his back and sticking to his skin in some places with sweat. his eyes are half closed, cheeks flushed, and jaw locked tight to keep himself from moaning. though your tears, you still can't get over how absolutely beautiful he was.
he holds you there for a good minute, his cum never stopping its flow until it does, and you drag your head back, pulling him out of your mouth.
you cough, splutter. some of his cum exits through your nose and you wince.
“fu–fuck." suguru pants, chest heaving. “fuck, you're an expert.” 
you smile at that. “thanks,” you whisper, voice hoarse.
your skin is flushed, eyes dark and unfocused, a trickle of cum dripping down your jaw. you looked absolutely delectable. suguru could just eat you up.
and he decides he will – you need some loosening up anyways. 
he picks you up, biceps bulging, and you squeal as he all but flings you on the sofa.
before you can think, he's on top of you, lips back on yours, tongue entwined with his. a small moan escapes you, and he groans into your mouth, lips trailing down to your jaw, then your neck. 
“g– get– sugu–ahh! fu–uuh–ck!”
his teeth attack the skin, tongue lapping the fresh bruises as they appear. you know they'll turn an angry colour tomorrow but you can't care. you need him.
his palms trail up the shirt, skimming over your thighs then higher. higher, until–
his thumb brushes your clit and you jolt, body tending under his.
"you're dripping" he mumbles, pushing a thick digit inside you. "just from sucking my dick? fuck." 
you whimper in response.
suguru fucks you with that single finger, pumping it in and out if your drenched pussy. the steady build of pleasure has your legs almost locking around suguru's forearms. 
he adds another finger. That stretches you a bit, and you grit your teeth at the barely-there but still-existent pain. more pumping. the build of pleasure, but faster this time, more intense. your hear the slick, squelching sounds of his fingers in your pussy, and you blush.
his lips are back on yours again, just as insistent. he sucks your bottom lip into his mouth and you gasp as he presses his fingers into you harder, thumb working lazy circles on your clit. you squirm.
"ooh, you like that?" suguru grins. you don't answer, biting your lips to keep back moans. he clicks his tongue. “no, baby, don't keep those precious sounds from me, yeah? come on, good girl.” he whispers huskily into your ear, suddenly curling his finger into you and hitting a spot that makes you see stars.
you yelp, back arching off the sofa, a strangled moan being forced out of your throat. 
"ooh! that's it. I need more from you. can you do that?" he doesn't wait for your response. insistently, his fingers curl inside you, massaging that perfect spot deep inside you and, fuck, you can't help the moans and gasps that tumble out of your lips without permission.
you can't help how good it feels, his fingers stretching you open, slick dripping around his fingers. can't help but think how exquisite it would feel if they were his cock instead. 
you squeeze your eyes shut, back arching against the sofa, with suguru very steadily leading you towards the delicious edge of an orgasm.
“fuck– mmmph! geto, I– ahh!” it hits you like a train. your back arches of the sofa, eyes rolling back in your head from the absolute pleasure. your legs tremble. cunt twitching around his fingers and you try your hardest not to scream.
the pleasure was brain numbing; better than anything that you've ever felt, leaving your body spent and sagging into the sofa, eyes barely able to focus on his lovely face.
it takes every bit of suguru’s self control not to fuck you senseless right then, to lose himself in your tight cunt. instead, he presses his lips on yours, lazily exchanging saliva, and kisses down your body – to your navel, and then–
you jolt, a curse ripping through your throat as a hot, open mouthed kiss is placed on your clit. it startles you, but suguru doesn't give any time to recover, licking and sucking at the little nub like his life depends on it. 
“does that feel good? tell me.” suguru murmurs into your skin. 
unable to form words you moan, running fingers through his thick, black hair. 
“Delicious…” suguru murmurs into the moist flesh, the vibrations going straight to your clit. you almost scream.
suguru geto eats pussy like an expert, his tongue worming his way into you, slurping up your juices wetly like he'd been dehydrated for months. he licks flat-tongued stripes up your clit before sucking it into his mouth, basically playing with it on his tongue.
you're losing it, fingers raking through his dark hair, pressing him into you, legs wrapped tight around his head. you're close; you can practically taste it at this point, with your thigh muscles contracting, stomach clenching. and then–
white.
white and static and the most overwhelming flood of pleasure you've ever felt. it rolls over you in thick, heavy waves, weighing you down and making you practically seize. 
you don't know how long it takes for you to come to your senses. 
by the time you do though, you're at the cusp of another orgasm, suguru still working his ministrations on your clit.
you scream at him to stop. it's too much; you're too sensitive! 
your pleas, however, fall on very deaf ears. he doesn't stop, gripping your hips to keep you in place while he continues. he rolls the tender nub around his tongue like he would a lollipop, and, once more, you're seizing on his tongue.
you black out for longer this time. when you come to, you find suguru looking at you with a mix of fascination and awe, his dark eyes glossy with arousal. his entire upper body is drenched, either with sweat or... something else. it's like someone threw a bucket of water at him.
“more.” he groans, voice husky. “give me more of that.”
before you stutter out denial, his lips are back on your lower ones, tongue-fucking you into ecstasy.
from that point on, you lose track of the number of orgasms you've had that night. all you know is that it was definitely not in the single digits. but the time suguru is done making a meal out of you, you, the couch and suguru are drenched with your bodily fluids. you're also a senseless mess, body still trembling, overstimulated.
suguru kisses up your abdomen, tongue lingering on your nipples before he finally comes up to kiss your forehead.
“I need to- I need to fuck you. you'll let me, won't you?” he questions pleadingly, grinding his erection against your cunt. “pl– fuck– please, I can't go to bed like this.” his eyes are soft, pleading and begging for you. and, fuck, you can't deny him.
suguru wonders why he all of a sudden can't control himself around you. why all he can think about is bottoming out in your warm cunt. it's obviously not the first time he's doing this, definitely not the last… but his cock is the hardest it's ever been, his heart thumping against his ribcage. he chalks it up to the excitement of fucking his best friend's (ex) girlfriend. or maybe the alcohol, though he wasn't one to let something like that affect his judgment. 
but fuck it, whatever. the two of you have gone past the point of no return.
“that's my girl.” he smiles, placing another kiss on your forehead. and then your cheek
you feel the tip of him pressed against you. grunting, he tries to push it in, only for it to slip against your wetness, nudging against your clit.
you whimper at the feeling, heart pounding in your chest.
again, he tries pushing his tip inside you, this time guided by a hand against his pulsing member. it slips inside you with ease and you both moan at the intrusion. 
for you, the pleasure is spiked with pain as his fat cock splits you open at the seams, threatening to unravel you. you hiss and whimper at each inch sliding into you, your pussy pushing him out with each contraction around his dick.
“sh- fuck, you're so fucking tight.” he says through gritted teeth, physical exertion making his muscles tense. “you've gotta loosen up, or i might not pull out in time.”
silently, you wrap your legs around his waist, pulling him closer to you and at the same time making him bottom out. the tip of his cock hits the opening of your cervix and you yelp, pleasure and pain mixing into a hot brew in your stomach and tightening into a cord. 
“...the fuck did that come from?” he groans, voice tight. he rocks his hips into you, gripping your waist tight and hissing. 
you shake your head, unknowing. all you do know is that you need him. right now, as deep inside you as he can go.
had his patience not been worn thin, suguru would have asked you to voice your thoughts. how did it feel? did it hurt? fast or slow? but his cock is so hard and your pussy so tight, his cock might have an aneurysm. he can't even form words to begin with. so he starts with an experimental pace, slow and steady, rocking into you and splitting you open. 
you whine and gasp each time he fully bottoms out into you, the tip of his cock just barely grazing your cervix. the slow pace is exquisite, but you need more. in your current state, you wont accept anything else.
“f– faster, please…” you whine. “harder,”
without hesitation, suguru obliges. for fear of breaking you beyond repair, suguru had started out with a slow, steady pace. however, it seems you didn't want that. and he was grateful. he wasn't sure how much longer he could keep yourself from fucking your pretty pussy senseless.
he does that, hips picking up their pace absolutely fucking the life out of you. the pace he sets makes his hips a blur, his dick reaching places you never knew existed. 
“fuck, you like that? yeah?” 
yeah, you nod as tears spill from your eyes, moans morphing to heavy sobs as the pleasure and slight pain build, heightening to a peak. the cord in your stomach is pulled ridiculously tight, your breathing ragged. 
“fv– fucking– unnghhhhh – ahhhhh—” you say, or rather, try to. it doesn't work out – clearly – your words fucked out of your mouth just as they spill from your lips. 
“trying to say something?” suguru grunts out.
a particularly hard thrust has your barely that there thoughts skittering into nothing with a sharp yelp, back arching off the sofa as you brush dangerously close to your orgasm.
“fuck!–nnn–g–h... fuck– n– m’... m’ gonna cum… shit–” you mumble, eyes rolling back, in your head. your cunt traps suguru in a vice-like grip, your overflowing lubrication the only reason he's able of move properly. he grunts, smashing his lips onto yours and swallowing the sounds coming out of your mouth.
good lord, it feels good. better than anything you've ever had, ever -felt. and holy fuck, you're going to cum. cum yourself unconscious, if you will. it's dangerously close, and you can feel it, creeping up to you, making the edges of your body tingle. it's scary, but feels so good.
“go ahead, doll. come for me, yeah? drench this cock with you.” suguru murmurs in your ear, and suddenly, the orgasm takes hold of you, slamming into you with such force, your back arches violently into suguru’s hold. the cord in your tummy snaps and a scream rips through your throat with the sheer force of the pleasure, and white overtakes your vision before it fades to black.
suguru fucks you through your orgasm, threatening to do you through another. your whole body feels like an exposed nerve, and you don't think you've ever felt as close to death as you do now.
your cunt flutters around his cock, and he hisses as his hold on your hip tightens. fuck, you feel like heaven, your cunt so tight, so wet, so, fucking perfect around him. each time he drags himself out of you, the suction draws him back in, and once he's in, you try to push him back out again. he can't explain why, but that feeling is positively exquisite, and God, he loves it.
“fuck!” he exclaims, face buried in your neck. “fuck, im cumming. fuck, I'm– you’ve… you've gotta tell me where you want it.”
you don't need to think much about the answer. inebriated and incredibly horny, a single word comes to mind. “inside– nnngh!” you breathe, your legs weakly tightening around his waist, drawing him closer to you.
“al– hah!– alright. I'm gonna fuckin’... hah, fuck!” he didn't get to complete his sentence, his muscles stretching taut as a white heat spills inside you.
it's enough to send fireworks exploding behind your tightly closed eyes, your orgasm lighting your body on fire with his cum as the catalyst.
“fuck, ahhhh– you feel so fucking good, hah–” suguru groans as he pours himself into you, teeth clamping down on your shoulder and making you scream. 
he finds his hips rocking into yours once more, fucking you through the aftershocks and overstimulation of both your orgasms.
you shake your head, no. no, no, no more, no! you can't cum any more than you have already or you might die. you shake your head as vigorously as you can, the choked out moans tumbling from your mouth neutralizing your denial.
“fuck, im sorry. one more, yeah? one more, just one more, please,” Suguru whispers breathily into your hair, voice trembling from the pleasure. he can barely breathe, his breath catching his lungs from how good he feels and fuck, its not long before another orgasm creeps up on him, looming over him like a disaster.
and he will be one by the time this is over, he's sure. “fuck, yo– you're g'nna make me cum- again, shit–” 
me too. you think just as you black out for good, chased to unconsciousness by a spill of heat.
you're woken up by a sharp pain in your lower abdomen as you try to change position. you groan, eyes fluttering open, and you find that those hurt too. every single inch of your body hurts, some minor, some major, but it kind of feels like you got into mini car accident. God, and you had an awful sore throat.
at the feel of sheets on your once bare skin, you sit up, realizing that you’re no longer on the couch.
judging from the scent of the room, or the lack thereof, you guess that you’re in suguru’s room. though the sliver of light though the curtains, you can see that it's organised perfectly. 
groaning, you swing your legs over the side of the bed and stand up, trying your best to maintain balance, ignoring the burn of your inner thigh and abdominal muscles, then you walk out of the room, to the kitchen.
the room is an assault of light to your poor eyes and you wince, squinting. vaguely, you can see Suguru standing in front of the kitchen stove. whatever he’s cooking up smells pretty good.
“hi, Suguru.” you say, smiling, walking towards him. the warmth in your face freezes as your eyes catch another person in the room. Gojo. he's sitting on a chair by the kitchen island, typing away at his phone. “hi Satoru.”
he looks up, startled, then confused at your dishevelled appearance. you’d forgotten you wouldn't look the best after last night. “oh. I didn't know you were here.” he says.
“she stopped by last night. good morning.” suguru smiles back at  you, handing you a plate of food. “you'll find some painkillers on the side table in my room. you'll probably need them after last night. and tea for your throat.” he says and you blush at the memory and nod. 
Gojo watches the exchange silently, a pale white brow cocked. “what happened last night?” he questions and Suguru throws him what might have been a glare.
in response to Satoru's question, you shrug. “uh, nothing. I stopped by in the rain and asked for some alcohol to keep warm. I ended up taking a bit too much.” you pop a piece of bacon in your mouth.
“and that explains the bruises on your neck?” he asks and you freeze, heart thumping. then you swallow, making yourself remember that Gojo was also a shitty cheater. it cancels out.
“yeah.”
he coughs out a laugh, bright blue eyes hardening to sapphires. “bullshit.” he says and turns to suguru. “did you fuck her?”
he shrugs, turning off the stove and sliding a plate of food towards gojo.
“what the fuck, Suguru? why would you do that?” he yells, face paling. “you're my fucking best friend, why the fuck would you fuck my girlfriend?”
“ex girlfriend.” you step in instead, voice bleeding with anger and that shuts Gojo up. “sorry, I forgot you were the only one who could cheat.”
satoru, about to open a drawer to pick up a fork, pauses and turns to look at you with an unreadable expression.
“you thought I wouldn't figure it out? you're very bad at keeping secrets.” another peice of bacon in your mouth. suguru hands you a cup of lemon tea. “I actually stopped by yesterday to break up with you. but it seems you'd told your roommate you'd be out with me. why? when you'd told me that you'd be at home having a games night with suguru.”
“that was the plan, but I stepped out.” gojo says, the ice in his eyes reflecting in his voice.
you flinch, but hold your ground. “stepped out for the whole night?”
“I got caught in the rain.”
“which stopped before I went to bed.” 
a rushed breath of air leaves Suguru's mouth as laughter. you roll your eyes. “more like blacked out.” he says under his breath. Gojo's eyes dart to him, then you.
“I… stayed over at a friend's house.” he says carefully. 
“which friend?” 
he pauses, eyes cloudy with thought. “...you won't know them.”
“we share friendship circles. whoever I haven't met, at least I've heard of.” you drum a nail on the table, patience wearing to the width of papyrus paper. he's wasting time with his lies.
“she's–” he starts, and catches himself. your eyes narrow. “they're not from our circle. I met them at a party. I don't have to tell you about every single person I befriend.”
“befriend and fuck.” 
“I didn't fuck her!” Gojo slams his hand on the table in outrage.
“the used condom back at my apartment. was that me? did I use that? the cum stains on my bed–” you scrunch up your face in disgust. “--that was me, right? I grew a dick overnight. stop lying, it doesn't suit you.”
he doesn't have anything to say in return and neither do you. “I'm breaking up with you.”
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puranami · 1 year ago
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✿ It's The Little Things - 3 ✿
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A/N: @leafyturtle come get y'all Franky and Robin fluff! I'm excited for this one, lotsa faves in here >:3c
Summary: Little relationship things with (currently) anime/manga exclusives ✿
Characters: Franky, Robin, Law, Kid, Killer
Content: SFW, G/N reader, language in Kid's (bc it's Kid lol) bottomless fluff ✿
(Part 1 - Luffy, Zoro, Nami, Usopp, Sanji) (Part 2 - Buggy, Shanks, Mihawk) (Part 4 - Crocodile, Rosinante, Doflamingo)
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Franky
✿ Multiply his self-aggrandizing by 100, and that's how he sees you; he is your personal hype man! Every single insecurity, no matter how big or small, will be kissed away, because you are perfect, and you should definitely tell people as such. Wait, you're too shy and don't want to? No worries, Franky's got you, and he'll tell everyone himself. Loudly. No, he won't stop or tone it down; "The world needs to know how super you are!" He loves when you hype him up in turn, and uses it to show you how great self confidence is; and it will rub off on you. He's so proud when you declare how amazing you are, even if it's just to him! "AOW! That's right, babe, you are amazing!" He'll pick you up in those huge, strong arms of his, practically crushing you in a bear hug.
✿ Franky loves to make you any and all gadgets he thinks you'd like, or need. Just as he is constantly upgrading his body, he develops and re-develops things that make your life easier, or that bit cooler! While he likes to surprise you with them, seeing how your eyes light up in wonder as he shows you how it works, he loves it even more when you're involved in the building process; brainstorming ideas, designing, picking out the colour palette, he'll even let you use a blowtorch, just, please be careful, wait what was that twinkle of mischief in your eyes? Okay, no more blowtorch - leave it to the pro! It would kill him if you got hurt on his watch, he's meant to protect you!
✿ He's made up a comfy little alcove in his workshop so you can keep him company while he's working. Soft cushions, blankets, lights so can work on your own hobbies, it's perfect! Even when you were just friends, you were always welcome there, and it's become your little safe space. It's comfy enough to fall asleep there when Franky works late, and he even modified it so that there is room for him to sleep there too. While hanging out, you'll talk about everything, and nothing, what you're both working on, or you'll simply listen to music and enjoy each others presence, and that often leads to loud singing, especially on Franky's part. He'll share his cola with you too, you just bring the snacks - can't work on an empty stomach after all!
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Robin
✿ Robin is very calm and reserved, especially compared to the rest of the crew, so her way of showing affection follows the same pattern. She'll put a gentle hand on your arm, and touch your foreheads together, but her favourite thing to do is to grow an arm out of your own, reaching down to hold your hand, all while on the other side of the room, smiling to herself. If your eyes are sharp, you'll catch the delicate blush on her cheeks when you bring your arm up to kiss her hand, or gently hold it to your cheek. She'll also make a pair of arms to wrap around your waist, or shoulders if you're sat down. She'll hold you personally too, but that is saved for your private quarters or the library.
✿ Part of her flirting is making dark comments and jokes; "I know the best way to your heart, dear." - "Through my stomach?" - "Oh no, that's not very efficient! It's anywhere between the 2nd and 4th ribs." She'll say it with such a loving gaze and gentle smile, and if you didn't know Robin better, you'd be worried she was plotting your murder, but that's just how she is, and you love her for it. She will also tell you all the gruesome details she finds in her books and research. Part of you suspects that she's purposefully trying to spook you so she can comfort you, but really she just finds these thing fascinating. Robin will be ecstatic if you can match her gallows humour, or if you have morbid facts of your own you can share with her.
✿ She takes great comfort in the fact that you love her unconditionally, and that you have always accepted her as she is, morbid interests, and former associations included, and she makes sure that you know she loves you all the same, no matter your quirks, flaws, and mistakes, for that is the beauty of love! You are each others port in the unrelenting storm of life.
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Law
✿ Law is so used to losing the people he loves most, so for him to open up, it will take a lot of time, patience, and understanding. You can't push him on things, and will have to wait for him to come to you - he needs to feel like he has some control over the situation so he can make better judgement calls, and do something if it all goes wrong. It's nothing personal, he just doesn't want to helplessly watch his world fall apart again; he's older, smarter, and much stronger now, he will keep those he cares about safe. Once he's at that point where he feels like he's ready to be open and honest, he is completely dedicated and doggedly loyal, though he isn't very expressive with it.
✿ He shows his love through acts of service; making sure you are eating and sleeping well, tending any injuries you get in day to day life, moving you if you've fallen asleep in a weird place or position so you don't get any aches and pains, or catch a cold. Law hopes that you can feel the love he has for you in each action. He just wants to know you are healthy and well so he doesn't need to worry about you. Well, he says that, but he still worries, he can't help it. You'll need to use his own tactics against him to make sure he actually sleeps and eats instead of just working. It won't always work, sometimes he's working on things that are far too important, but he will relent otherwise.
✿ PDA is not a thing for him. At all. It's almost like he doesn't want to jinx things with the world seeing he has entrusted his heart with another again. On the Polar Tang, when it's just you and the crew, he'll be a little more open, placing a hand on your head or shoulder, matching your pace as he walks beside you, slightly gentler eyes, and the hint of a smile; so subtle, yet the crew sees right through him, and they like to tease you both. Nothing serious, but it still gets them the worst chores in response. In private, when you are alone is the only time will he allow himself to be vulnerable.
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Kid
✿ Given how intense and aggressive he is, you have the patience of a goddamn saint, and guts to back you up. He refuses to lessen himself for anyone; he is who he is, and you can either accept it and embrace him fully, or you can, in his words, "Fuck right off!" It will take a lot to break through the immense barriers he has - he will shout, argue, insult, and to get through, you have to be able to withstand that without crumbling. Shout back! Show him you're not gonna let anyone walk all over you, not even him, earn his respect, then you can build up from there. Once you've wormed your way into that exclusive club of 'We aren't Killer, but Kid still cares about us," he will be ride or die with you, and when he realises he genuinely likes you, or hell, even loves you, he would burn down the world for you if you asked him to.
✿ Out in public, you get no special treatment. It's just safer that way. He can't afford to be looking over his shoulder every other minute to make sure no one is trying to get to him through you. He'll still keep an eye on you of course, but it's indistinguishable from him watching over the rest of the crew. On the Victoria Punk he will be possessive, but not affectionate. Kid will keep you by his side, or drag you onto his lap, just generally manhandling you really, there will be no mistaking who you belong to. Once you're alone he will actually soften up; he knows he's a lot, and he cares deep down, but he's still in charge, he is your captain after all. You should take advantage of this time to get all the affection out of him that you can!
✿ You're one of the few that are actually allowed to hang in his workshop, as long as you don't bother him. He'll entertain some conversation if he's just setting up, or having a break, but once he's in the zone, zip it. He's fine with you watching him work - he's good at what he does and he knows it, but seeing the admiration in your eyes is a nice ego boost. He'll make you things if the mood hits him, particularly bits of jewellery, as it makes it easier to manhandle you from the other side of the room. He's a busy man, he doesn't want to wait for you to look his way and walk over, he wants your attention now!
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Killer
✿ Like Kid, Killer has a tendency to manhandle, but it's not nearly as aggressive; he's a big guy with big, strong muscles, and he just enjoys hauling you around like a sack of potatoes. It gives him the opportunity to hold you close, 'accidentally' touch your butt, and your laughter through it all is just so sweet. He greatly enjoys your presence when he's going about his day, and deeply appreciates any assistance you can offer, such as in the kitchen, and certainly when trying to manage his idiot best friend and crew, as he's essentially the de facto caretaker on board. Often you'll end up sat on his shoulders, acting as an extra pair of eyes and hands - no shenanigans go unnoticed!
✿ You have become an expert at reading Killer's moods and expressions through his mask, every slight shift of his body, and the angle of his head has a very specific meaning. It doesn't help that he's a quiet man in general; balancing Kid's incessant ranting and raving with his well thought out, straight to the point statements. He much prefers to listen to you talk, only talking when he has something to add to the mostly one-sided conversation. He loves having these 'chats' with you sat in his lap, head resting against his broad chest. Sometimes his goatee will tickle the top of your head, and he lives for those giggles.
✿ It will take a long time for him to feel comfortable enough to remove his mask, and you can bet he refuses to laugh around you for the longest time. Just be patient with him, and let him do things when he's ready, and don't make a big deal out of it if something slips; he'll be pretty mortified, so just giving him a loving smile and a gentle touch will reassure him that maybe the things he's insecure about, or straight up hates, aren't as big an issue as he believes them to be. Telling him he is perfect is appreciated, but not effective in building him up, since nothing is perfect really, but seeing you love him unconditionally certainly will give him a boost.
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808 notes · View notes
rancidpancakebatter · 1 year ago
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Picnics at Sunset - [L Lawliet]
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Pairings: L (Death Note) x Female!Reader
Summary: You knew that You cared for Ryusaki very much. You knew you trusted him with your life, and you always felt better when he was around. You knew that you desired his attention and approval more than anyone else’s. You knew that he was beautiful and kind. But you didn’t know if he felt any of those things about you. You didn’t know what those things meant. Or rather, you feared what they could mean, and what that would do to the both of you.
Word Count: 14k words
Content: Swearing, Mentions of death, nudity?, friends to lovers, first kiss, Use of Celcius, touch of angst (it's death Note, come on), Sappy thoughts of love
( Masterlist )
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A/N: I have so much to say, but I'll try to keep it brief. I'm sorry this is so long, but so much of this show cuts to long internal dialogues within a conversation, and I tried to capture that. I think I did well, but it is a little long-winded. I don't know if I'll do a lot of writing for this character, but he got stuck in my head recently, and this was the only way I knew to let him go.
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You sat at your desk, the computer screen you had been staring at for the past three hours was beginning to hurt your head. You leaned back in your chair, rubbing your eyes; then silently cursing as you felt your mascara smear against the pads of your fingers. You needed a break and something other than a slice of cake in your stomach. You looked to your right out of habit, ready to tell your friend that you were taking a break and he should do the same, but his chair was empty.
You looked around the room.
“He stepped outside,” a voice said.
Behind you was Matsuda. You jumped when he spoke, not realising he was there, and he apologised for startling you.
“Yeah, we should get you a bell,” you suggested.
“Yeah, maybe so.” Matsuda laughed. “You know, if you want to bounce ideas off of someone, you can talk to me. I know I can’t come close to Ryusaki’s intelligence, but I’d like to think I have something to offer.”
“It’s okay,” you reassured. “I didn’t really need anything from him, just wanted to see what he was up to.”
“Well, I think he just needed some space to think. You know how he is.” 
“That I do,” You agreed, “And I know If he wants to be alone, he’ll have no problem telling me himself.” 
Matsuda laughed again, “I’m sure you’re right. But I have a feeling he won’t shoo you away. He has a soft spot for you.”
Just the idea of L turning you away had you put out. You crossed your arms, turning away with a huff. “Not if he knows what’s good for him.”
You heard Matsuda chuckling behind you, wishing you luck. 
You marched up the stairs, down the hall, and got in the elevator, heading for the roof. As you made your way, you couldn’t help but admire the walls around you. The building L designed was quite impressive. You greatly enjoyed the glass elevator, preferring it over any others. Once you passed the tenth floor, the city could be seen. You were usually greeted by blinding sun and clear blue skies, but today, the sky was an enchanting apricot colour, blanketed by thick pink clouds heavy with rain. The sun was peaking from behind the silver buildings as if waiting to see you before finally saying goodbye. You waved to the people below, wishing them well on their oblivious wayfaring. 
Soon you reached the top floor, and you pushed open the door to get to the roof access. The door to the roof was already opened, so you called out.
“Ryusaki! You out there?”
You were greeted by silence and tried again.
“I’m alone!”
Only then did you get a reply, “Did you bring any food?”
You chuckled, stepping out onto the roof. “No, I’m sorry.”
L stood out in the open, basking in the fading light and staring at the sky, unbothered by the cold air blowing. He was slouched over and hands firmly in his pockets. He turned his head to you, and the vibrant sky poured over his pale skin, drenching the soft canvas in the colours of monarchs and sunflowers. The light danced around his prominent eyes, flames in a ring of stone. His lips looked kissed by a dreamsicle. You looked away, finding your way back to reality. 
“Did you want me to go back and get something?” You offered, throwing your thumb back towards the door. 
“No,” He said, turning back to the sun, “Watari should be up soon.”
Before you could question, you heard the door open and close and the clinking sound of plates as they made their way up the stairs. 
“Hello, dear,” The old man greeted with a smile. 
He carried a tray with a full tea set in one hand and a wicker basket in the other, with a blanket draped across his arm. You watched as he laid it out on the ground, pulling plates and silverware from the basket along with a candelabra. Ryuga settled himself as Watari lit the candles, then gestured for you to do the same. The only clear spot to sit was right beside him, and you took it as gracefully as possible. 
“I have brought sandwiches and various tea cakes,” Watari explained, “along with Keemun Mao Feng tea and honey. I hope you enjoy.”
You both thanked him and he left, closing the roof exit behind him. L sat, perching next to you, watching as you admired the display. 
“It’s all my favourites,” You observed. “Why did you ask him to bring this?”
His thumb came to rest on his lip, gauging your reaction. 
“I knew you would be getting hungry soon. I told Watari to bring some acceptable food if you didn’t grab any on your way up.”
You furrowed your brows in innocent confusion, “How did you know I’d come?”
His head turned away and you notice his feet shuffling, a tell for his anxiety. 
“You always do.” He said with a shrug. 
Your heart thumped affectionately as he turned his head, and your gaze fell back onto the band of sterling silver in his eyes. You smiled fondly at the man, and he had to look away. He busied himself with the basket, pulling out nicely wrapped sandwiches in brown butcher paper. He read the options out for you and passed you your selections. He then reached in and pulled out a white box with a blue bow. He began to tug at it, then stopped, offering it to you. 
You giggled, unravelling the satin ribbon. When he pulled off the lid, a tiered display stand stood with ten layers of tiny cakes with an array of colours, creams, and toppings. L looked over the selection with a careful eye, then chose a spongy square with a raspberry on top. He pinched it between his fingers and brought it to his lips. You watched his selection process as you braided the ribbon into a piece of your hair, presenting it to your friend with a smile. He nodded in approval, and then you finally took a bite of your sandwich, moaning as the myriad of flavours filled your senses. 
“Oh my god, this is delicious,” you said, pushing it towards Ryusaki, “You’ve gotta try it.”
His chewing stops as he eyes the sandwich in front of him like it were a loaded gun. 
“I’m okay.” He said politely. 
You accepted his dismissal, taking another bite from your sandwich, but still curious about it. 
“Why don’t you eat anything but sugar?” You asked through a mouthful of sourdough. 
“Well,” Ryusaki began, “Desserts tend to be more homogeneous in texture and taste. I find most ‘real’ food reduces my deductive skills by approximately twenty-five percent.”
You looked up at the beauty of the ending day around you and breathed in the air of the city. 
“Do you need your deductive skills right now?” You asked softly, eyes still trained on the sky. 
Moments passed in peaceful silence. You could hear a dog barking and the mummer of the life teeming below you. People going about their everyday lives, despite the horror of this new world. You tried to join them now and then, encouraging Ryusaki to do the same– to have a life outside of, despite of Kira. From your peripherals, you saw him spread his knees apart, sitting in a cross-legged position. You watched as he continued adjusting, trying to find a comfortable position. When he settled, you turned your eyes to his. 
“Would you like some tea?” You asked. 
He nodded his head, and you poured him half a cup from the teapot, filling the rest with cream and sugar, just the way he liked it. He thanked you when you passed it to him, fingers brushing briefly. You could tell he was a little uncomfortable, probably much more in tune with the “loss of thought” he was experiencing than any other person would be. He held his cup in both hands, elbows resting on his knees as he looked into the wheat-coloured drink. You left L to his thoughts, knowing he would share them if he deemed them important. You instead focused on tucking the rest of your sandwich away, opening another to try. You were happy Watari cared enough to cut them into little triangles. 
“What are your plans after the Kira case?”
You nearly choked on your sandwich, not expecting the question. You wiped at your mouth with a napkin, trying to grab your composure. 
“I haven’t given much thought to it,” you said, “but I know it will be a bittersweet moment when we catch him.”
Ryuga sat up a little, his interest piqued as he took another sip of his tea. “What do you mean by that?”
“Well,” you began, “I’ve met a lot of great people by working on this investigation. I don’t imagine our paths will cross much once this is all resolved, even if we do survive. But it makes me happy to think that one day they’ll get to walk into their front doors and hug their families without the fear of them being ripped away as collateral damage.”
“Not to mention,” You continued, “at the risk of sounding selfish, this job has some really nice perks. I’m compensated well, I get free room and board, I haven’t done my own laundry in four months, and I can even get company-provided gourmet picnics on the rooftop. There’s a lot to miss.”
“I must admit, I will miss the camaraderie,” L said softly. “But I fear the fallout from Kira’s arrest more.”
You knew what he meant. If he was right, and Light and Misa were Kira and The Second Kira, then it would destroy the task force. Matsuda’s heart would shatter, as would Mogi’s, though he’d hide it better than the former. Chief Yagami would likely suffer another heart attack, or perhaps snap entirely. And while you yourself didn’t want to believe it, you couldn’t deny what you knew was true. With the proof of shinigami's existence and an otherworldly murder weapon disguised as a harmless notebook downstairs, nothing could be ruled out. You questioned what other powers came with the notebook, and how those powers transferred. 
Bribing Ryuke into answering all your questions was easy enough. It turns out he had never known the taste of a Fuji apple, only enjoying the common red delicious. One was enough to get him hooked. You presented everything you had learned about ownership of the notebook, how it can be passed, and how it affects the user. You and L had come to the same conclusion: sometime in Light’s confinement, he transferred ownership, as did Misa. You knew for sure when Misa visited Light the other day in the lobby. 
At the beginning of the investigation, he refused to toy with her emotions, as it went against his code. And you found it comforting, knowing Kira would have no problem doing that, and Light was immediately opposed. For months, he made no effort to show affection to Misa, rebuffing any advance or innuendo she made, but you watched as he brought her into a hug. You watched as she melted into it, savouring the sparring touch and every word he whispered into her ear. You knew he hadn’t magically fallen in love with the girl, but was using the love she had for him. 
Yes, Light had changed, and the repercussions were terrifying.
Ryusaki was silent. By now, the sun had set, and the moon began climbing up a ladder of stars. The candlelight flickered, making shadows jump and jive across your friend’s face. The shifts were jarring, but the gentle lighting softened his hardened edges. Your eyes traced the slope of his nose, down his plush lips, and his long neck. You wished to stretch out a curious finger to replace your itinerant eyes. 
“Would you like a cake?” Ryusaki asked, changing the subject. You allowed the distraction, deciding you would bring it up again later, but not know. 
You selected one with orange filling and chocolate drizzle. It was delicious, falling apart in your fingers as you ate it. You heard a soft chuckle leave your friend's mouth and you looked up at him confused. He said nothing, instead motioning towards his face. You tilted your head, not understanding what he meant. Before you could ask, L brought a napkin to the corner of your mouth, gently rubbing it across your bottom lip. 
Your heart stopped beating and your lungs stopped breathing. His touch was like the flames of the flickering candles, igniting the skin he polished. His eyes flicked up to yours and you were lost in a pool of obsidian, his pupils vast in the stary night. 
“There,” he said softly, “all gone.”
You searched for your voice, and it came out in a breathy whisper, “Thanks.”
He continued, unbothered by the unprecedented physical contact while you took a sip of your tea, in hopes that would help your unsteady heart. Before you had much time to recover, He spoke again. 
“My favourite colour is blue.”
You blinked dumbly, at the man as he readjusted uncomfortably. 
“My favourite cake is Strawberry Vanilla Sponge Cake,” He continued, “and I sing in the shower.”
You laughed out of shock, and words continued to spill from his mouth like he couldn’t stop them. 
“If I could have a superpower, I would want invisibility. I think four-leaf clovers are ridiculously overblown, but I admire their inherent whimsy. I really like The Beatles, which is very embarrassing as I am British. But even more so because I listen to ‘We Can Work It Out’ when I get frustrated. They bring me a sort of comfort. I’ve always wanted a cat. I think it’s funny when they’re given people names, or named after ridiculous things. If I had one, I’d get a tuxedo cat and name it 3,4,4,5-tetramethylcyclohexa-2,5-dien-1-one.” You open your mouth to ask what that was, but he answered it before you could, “It’s a cyclic dienone, more commonly known as penguinone, and though it has no applicable uses, it’s funny.”
You shake your head, trying to make sense of his sudden urge to tell you all of these things. In his unblinking eyes, you saw something close to desperation and it confused you, forcing you to look away. You missed the way Ryusaki’s face fell. 
“Are you…upset?” he asked cautiously. “I’m sorry if I overshared.”
“No, no,” You reassured, trying to alleviate some of the guilt that filled your chest at his apprehension. “I’m just confused”
“I was trying to establish trust,” he explained cooly. 
Your brows furrowed, “Do you think I don’t trust you?”
“No, I-” he paused, releasing a sigh that moved his shoulders. 
“Ignore me,” he said sadly, “Nothing I say lately seems to make much sense.”
Your heart shattered at the uncertainty in his voice. He usually spoke with such conviction. To hear him unsure, insecure in sensibility– his intelligence, really –it made you nauseous. 
“Ryusaki,” you began, but he looked away. 
“Ryusaki,” you tried again, this time resting a hand on his shoulder, “your sense is still very intact. You’re not the crazy one.”
He looked at your hand, where it rested without hesitancy. 
“Look,” you continued, “Someone is trying to kill you. And it could very likely be your best friend. You’re making more sense than anyone else would in your situation.”
Suddenly his eyes shot to yours. There was a small fire burning there, and you worried that you had upset him. You began to remove your hand, but he rested his on yours, keeping it pressed against his shoulder. Your heart leapt at the contact, and you prayed he didn’t notice. Though, if you knew anything about Ryusaki, he did and already tucked it away as useful information. 
“Light Yagami is not my best friend.” He said simply, “You are.” 
You couldn’t fight the smile that sprouted from the sentiment. 
“Really?” You asked in disbelief.
“Of course, I wouldn’t lie about that.”
Your smile grew more teasing, “But you didn’t even chain yourself to me.”
L smiled too, “I didn’t have to.”
Time passed in silence. It was a bit awkward, your hand remained on his shoulder as the candles burned. You were getting chilly, the night air nipping at you through your t-shirt. L’s hand kept yours still, you were much too nervous to move it away. Especially when you could see your friend thinking very hard. 
He suddenly turned toward you, removing his hand and jostling yours. His thumb came to his lip, running it across and moving the muscle. 
“There are a lot of social customs that I haven’t gotten to participate in, due to my isolated childhood, and even more so because of my dangerous career,” he said, “for instance, I had never had friends until this investigation, and now I have three. But that also means I haven’t experienced a lot of the common experiences that come with friendship.”
He looked you over, trying to gauge your reaction thus far. You seemed at ease but attentive. His eyes darted to the blue streak in your hair, and felt a warmth blossoming in his chest. He was amazed by how light-hearted you could be, despite the heavy burdens you carried. You shone so brightly, he was almost embarrassed to ask you to share.
“I was wondering if you would be willing to help me with that. I think it’s important to my development, and general understanding of the human condition.”
You were delighted to hear that he was thinking about such “trivial” things. As you became closer to L, you quickly realised that he lived a very lonely life. You could tell he had convinced himself that was what he wanted, but you knew a life of work wasn’t enough, and he deserved more. You always encouraged him to take care of more than his brain; to value his body and his spirit as well. 
“Of course L,” you nearly cheered, “what did you have in mind?”
You waited patiently for his response, trying your best not to shrink under his gaze. You were sure that his eyes were a large reason as to why he made such a great detective. When he focused his eyes on someone, it made them feel see-through; like he could see everything that made up that person. Like he could read your thoughts. 
“Can I-“ he began, then stopped. It was rare to see him trip over his words. “I would like- would it be okay if we hugged?”
Lightning struck across the sky, and you flinched, startled by the sound. You looked up into the dark, trying to find the flash of light you knew was long gone. You spotted the thick, rolling clouds hovering above you, and you hadn’t noticed before. Then the thunder rumbled, and the cry was resonant, penetrating your bones as it rolled through you. Then slowly, rain began falling from the sky. A few drops landed on your face, and you could feel them beginning to stick to your clothes. 
When your shock faded away, you looked back at your friend. He was looking at you intently, hunched over like always. You opened your mouth to respond, but L spoke before you. 
“Let’s step inside,” he said, resting his hand on your shoulder like you had before, “you’re shivering.”
You hadn’t realised that you were, but as you looked down at your hands, you couldn’t deny the tremble. He stood and began packing up everything on the blanket, refusing your help when you offered even though the rain had picked up. It was steady now, easily soaking through your clothes and his in turn. Once everything was tucked away, he guided you inside, opening the door for you. 
As you walked down the steps, your mind spun around his words. He had asked to hug you, someone who you thought would be pretty averse to physical touch. You were surprised he let you lay a hand on him at all, and even more surprised when he reciprocated the action. It could’ve just been an experiment, a test to see how it made him feel, but you found yourself reviewing your own results. 
You hadn’t really touched L before. There was no reason to. Even when he fell out of his chair over the whole “Shinigami” thing, you let the others crowd him. Your hands had maybe brushed here and there when passing sweets or documents, but intentional, prolonged contact was never made until today. You couldn’t deny his behaviour had been odd lately, though that was to be expected with the stress he was under. You wondered if he was indulging out of curiosity or a fear of missing out on life. 
You jumped again as another bolt of lightning struck across the sky, followed by the soft beginnings of rain, now slowly collecting on the glass walls around you. You began walking down the hall and jerked your head to beckon Ryusaki, who seemed deep in thought. You watched the rain grow, drops colliding and running down the glass. You stopped to trace the tracks left, your body shuttering against the cold.
“I’m sorry,” your friend spoke quietly, as there was no one but you here, and no reason to raise a voice. “I didn’t mean to make you uncomfortable.”
You looked at him with shock, but he refused to look at you. 
“Ryusaki, I haven’t felt uncomfortable around you since we started this investigation. Why would that change now?” When he didn’t respond, you bumped his shoulder with yours, “Seriously though, if you ever do make me uncomfortable, I won’t let you live it down.”
“Good,” he said, nodding his head. “I’ll hold you to that.”
You both continued to stare off into the distance in silence. You began breathing out hot puffs of air and drawing in the condensation. Meaningless shapes littered the space as you got lost in your thoughts. 
You felt stuck between knowing and knowing nothing. You knew that You cared for Ryusaki very much. You knew you trusted him with your life, and you always felt better when he was around. You knew that you desired his attention and approval more than anyone else’s. You knew that he was beautiful and kind. But you didn’t know if he felt any of those things about you. You didn’t know what those things meant. Or rather, you feared what they could mean, and what that would do to the both of you.
Your thoughts were interrupted once again when you felt a weight on your shoulders, and you looked down to see pale, slender hands embellished with tendons and glistening in the light. Your jaw dropped slightly, seeing him appear so close behind you in your shared reflection. 
“You’re still shivering.” He didn’t look at you, his eyes obscured by his shaggy hair, “A blanket should help.” 
You offered a kind, timid smile in thanks, turning to face him. Your cheeks filled with blood though you couldn’t quite pin down why. Maybe it was just because he was touching you again when he’s never really done that before. Or maybe it was the fact that he was concerned about you. Or maybe it was the intimacy of it all, how close he was and how gentle his touch was. 
His hallowed, all-seeing eyes met yours and you lost your breath. You wanted to look away, feeling pierced by his gaze, but you couldn’t– you wouldn’t. “If this isn’t sufficient, let me know. It’s my fault you’re cold.”
“No, it’s not,” You chuckled as he adjusted the material on your shoulder, “I walked out willingly. Yeah, you baited me into staying with food and tea, but I saw your plan, and I decided to go along with it.”
L smiled shyly, “I never could fool you.”
Your brows furrowed, and your heart sank. 
“Can.” You corrected sternly. “You never can fool me.”
“Ah, Of course.” L said, removing his hands from you and tucking them back into his pockets, “You’re too observant for me to keep a secret. You’re always the first in the room to know what I’m thinking.”
He didn’t directly address his slip-up– referring to himself in the past tense as if he had died –so you didn’t either, instead filing that away under “more things to bring up later”. 
“What can I say?” You teased. “Great minds think alike.”
“That they do,” he muttered, though you could tell his mind had taken him far away again. 
You turned back to the window, and he joined you there. The rain had picked up, the heavy clouds drawing nearer. Your body buzzed with the electricity in the air. You could feel the winds of change surging through the city, and it filled you with determination.
“You should change,” Ryusaki whispered, “you’ll catch a cold.”
“Please,” You said, rolling your eyes and landing on his. “We were out there for less than an hour, and it never dropped below four degrees.”
“That’s still rather cold,” He hid his eyes from you, and you missed the sparks he carried there. “Not to mention the addition of rain.”
“If you’re so worried about my immune system,” you quipped, “studies show that hugs can actually help fight illness.”
That got a reaction out of the man, whipping his head to look at you. 
“Is that so?” He asked, amusement teeming in his thin, grey irises. “Is it the exposure to more germs?”
“Possibly,” You admitted, “But it’s mostly the stress relief. Hugs reduce your cortisol and noradrenaline levels, improving blood pressure and general heart health. Also, with both of our body heats working together, it might help warm me up.”
L brought his thumb to his lip again, pondering your words. 
“Maybe you have a point.” He muttered, “Perhaps we should test this theory.”
You agreed but neither of you moved, both too afraid to make the first move. You had hugged people before. You had hugged your family and many friends, so hugging Ryusaki shouldn’t be that nerve-racking, and yet, your body was buzzing just at the concept. 
Suddenly, L Spread his arms, his figure drowning in his baggy sweater. It happened in slow motion, or at least it felt like it did. He dove towards you, wrapping his arms tightly around you, unintentionally pinning yours to your side, and his chin landed on the crown of your head gently. 
You tensed, not expecting him to just go for it. Your face was pressed into his chest, your nose brushing his collarbone because of how his sweater had shifted. You were suddenly self-conscious breathing on him, trying your best to make sure your lungs were expanding and contracting naturally, but you could feel the awkwardness in your muscles. 
“I don’t think this is working,” He said, his jaw moving against your head, “Your heart rate has only elevated. This seems to be…bothersome to you.”
He slowly removed himself but remained close, focusing his trying eyes on you, hands back in his pockets. “Please, tell me how you feel.”
“Well, firstly, you surprised me.” You couldn’t help but chuckle. Laughter bubbled up due to his unwavering gaze that affected you, though you didn’t want to concede to that. “And second, I’m not sure that counted as a hug. You trapped my arms, so I couldn’t reciprocate it properly.”
“I see,” He said, not showing any emotion you could detect (And you had gotten pretty good at reading L at this point). “What can I do better?”
His determination was…adorable. He was adamant about this, about hugging you better. You wouldn’t have thought this was something he ranked so highly in importance, and you felt flattered. 
“Open your arms again,” You instructed, scooting closer. 
He followed your orders, his head tilting to the side in curiosity. You took a quick breath, then brought your arms around his waist, then rested your ear between his pecs. There you heard his heart. You expected a steady thrum, but instead, the muscle beat like a kick drum without cause. But you supposed if you only fed your body sugar and caffeine, your heart would go crazy too.
He was also much comfier than you expected his skin and bones to be. His frame felt right in your arms, and a word flitted through your mind: safe. He was safe here in your arms, and you felt safe here too. 
You remembered then that he was still standing there with his arms fully extended, like an owl stretching their wings. 
“You can wrap your arms around me like before now,” You said into his chest. 
He did as you said, and you felt an instant relief. Your blanket was wrapped around him, and you were surrounded by L. He was soft, like the petals of a Gardinia– like the ones your mother used to grow. He smelled like chocolate and strawberries, though with his diet, you were sure he sweated out sugar. In the refracted light the droplets cast, it looked just like that, like sugar crystals dancing across his skin.
Your nose picked up hints of lavender you recognised as the fabric softener Watari swore by. You wanted to bottle the sents and wear them yourself. You found yourself snuggling in closer, drawn in by the comforts of L.
You sighed in contentment, closing your eyes. His heartbeat stabilized, beating slower but strong. Slowly, he adjusted himself, bringing his arms tighter around you and turning so his ear rested against you and not his hewn jaw. Many moments went by like that, with nothing but the instrumental played by the rain, steady breathing, and hearts beating. As time went on, your heartbeats began to sync, beating together. You felt warmth spread throughout you at the thought. You liked this. You liked being close to Ryusaki. 
“How long do these usually last?” He whispered into the rich silence. 
“It depends on the friends, everyone’s comfort levels.” You replied thoughtfully. “Some people only hug for a few seconds; others hold each other like this. But it’s recommended that you get at least four hugs a day.”
He hummed, considering your answer. “I definitely haven’t been fulfilling that quota.”
“It’s okay,” You said through a laugh, “Me either.”
“Perhaps,” L said, putting on his detective voice, “If you have found this as enjoyable as I, we could do this more often– try to reach that benchmark more. The act of hugging seems to increase my oxytocin levels, which feels different than the dopamine confections give me. If it affects you the same way, I think that could be good for us both.”
Your laughter danced across this skin. “I can’t believe you can feel the difference between happy hormones.”
“Of course I can.” He said, completely unphased by your disbelief. “Dopamine feels more like I’m doing a good job, and Oxytocin is…”
You waited patiently while he found the words. 
“Oxytocin makes me more…sentimental,” He landed on. 
“I guess that makes sense,” You mumbled into his chest. “Weirdo.”
He chuckled at the title that would have hurt coming from anyone else. 
“I would be okay with that,” You said, addressing his proposal, “If we hugged more often.”
“Great,” He said, and you could hear his smile. L could feel how the cold continued to cling to your skin. Although hugs were supposed to help fight illness, he doubted it was a cure. “We should finish up then so you can change.”
He released his hold on you and began to pull away, but without thinking, you held on tighter, your brows furrowing. 
“What’s wrong?” He asked.
“I’m not sure,” you said honestly. “I just don’t want to leave this.” L brought a hand to his chin, cradling it and trying his best not to jostle you. “Is it the hug that you want, or is it me?”
Your eyes bugged at his question. Immediately, you let go, creating distance as you jumped back. You reacted as if he had struck you instead of asking a straightforward question to better understand the situation. 
Your mouth opened and closed a few times, not unlike a fish plucked from the water.
“Well, I- It’s uh…I mean- heh -what?” You stumbled. Again, L’s shark skin eyes bore into yours, dissecting every stutter and stammer.
“I believe the question was fairly easy to comprehend.” He said plainly, “I asked if it was the hug you wanted or me.”
You felt blood rush to your cheeks. 
“I understood the question,” You weakly defended. 
L’s head dropped once again to the side, his hair flopping loosely as he moved but still weighing down over his face. 
“Then answer it.”
You swallowed. He had cornered you, baiting you by insinuating you weren’t as intelligent as he thought and getting you to confess that you in fact were not confused. But in truth, you were. Because it was true that you were extremely touched-starved. You had dedicated the better half of the last year to catching Kira. You hadn’t had time for much else. You weren’t exactly popular before either. 
You were a criminal, a cyber-robinhood. You had stolen from several pharmaceutical companies and redistributed their funds to families in need. You thought it absolutely abhorrent that the companies could make money off of cancer and diabetes, depriving people of medicine they needed, not wanted. You had done it with your best friend, who was killed by Kira.
She had taught you the ropes and how to hide yourself from the authorities. She, however, had crossed the line. She began targeting government officials, leaking their private messages and phone records to the public. You would have thought that would align with Kira’s morals, but you guess not because she died of a heart attack in your arms. You hadn’t made a friend since, not until Ryusaki. 
You didn’t want him to leave you too. You were terrified that he would be ripped away from you, much like your friend before. But it was more than that. You wanted Ryusaki to live. You wanted him to have a full life, one of joy and contentment. One where his intelligence wasn’t weaponised. One where he could let his guard down and not break his back with his posture. You wanted him to drown in hugs, to never be deprived of comfort again. And you wanted to be by his side to see it.
You had become very attached to the man before you. You admired him, respected him. You found yourself trying to be more like him in many ways. And you felt pride every time he mimicked you. 
“I don’t know.”
L was unconvinced, leaning in closer, “Yes, you do. But you won’t say.”
You stared into his eyes, words eluding you. What could you say? You weren’t even sure what you wanted, what your answer would be. He looked at you curiously, awaiting your response. When you had none, he sighed. 
“Fine then,” He said, turning his investigative gaze away from you. “I will escort you to your room. Hopefully, that will satisfy you.”
You had requested a room here at headquarters and were unsurprised when L told you that he had already built one for everyone on the task force. You had all but moved in during the Kira case. You hadn’t meant to, but it was just easier than taking the train alone after a late night of investigating. With no one to stop you, you would stay up until three ante merīdiem, studying and analysing trends. Sometimes you would crash at your desk, but usually, you would drag yourself away when you noticed your eyes becoming heavy. But now, your apartment was more of a formality than anything else. L knew this and made no comments on the matter. He was happy you stayed here instead, and that the rooms weren’t a complete waste of time and effort. 
As you travelled through the silent halls, you brought your blanket tighter around your shoulders, tensing your jaw so your teeth didn’t chatter. Ryusaki seemed unbothered by the cold. He showed no signs of discomfort other than the way his shoulders folded forward more than they usually did. You wondered if he was just suppressing them or if he truly wasn’t cold. But then you saw a small shiver travel down his spine. 
“You never told me,” you said softly, “what you were doing out there?”
His steady pace was unwavering, his bare feet gently padding across the tiled floors of the hall. 
“Thinking,” He replied but offered nothing more. 
“Of course you were thinking, that’s all you know to do. ” You joked, “What were you thinking about?”
He took a few more steps, then stopped. You continued forward until you were standing side by side. He stared ahead, but you turned to face him. You watched as his face remained flat, unchanged. 
“I was thinking about my death,” he said plainly, continuing his previous pace. “I reviewed my mental record of my will, noting necessary amendments. Due to recent events, I felt it something I reconsider.”
Your stomach twisted at his casualness, and you looked away. How could he say that and have no feeling about it? Or rather, rationalize whatever feelings he had about the situation away?
“You-” You began, your words tripping over the lump in your throat, “you shouldn’t talk like that. You’re not going to die.”
You said it with finality, though your friend heard the subtle desperation, the fear beneath your bravado. 
He stopped again, and when you turned to him, he turned as well. His eyes seemed almost hollow as he spoke. 
“We all die. And I happen to find myself in a position in which I am taunting the reaper.”
L did a lot of staring, and this one you took as a personal challenge. He knew what you meant, and he was purposefully not addressing it. You weren’t backing down; you weren’t folding for him. The other members of the task force often forgot that he was human; you refused to forget. While he was smarter than anyone you had ever met, he wasn’t a supercomputer. He had hopes and dreams; he had fears. 
“We’re here,” he said, interrupting this game of blink.
You hadn’t realised you had arrived at your room and hesitated at the door. 
“Would you like me to step inside?” He offered. 
You nodded. 
“Very well then.”
He opened the door and you stepped in. He closed the door behind him, then stood a few feet into the room, scratching at his leg with his foot. You made your way to your closet, selecting a new shirt and some sweatpants, then went to your dresser, selecting new undergarments.
L looked to the wall after catching a glimpse of the lacey bra you balanced from your finger. You looked to your friend, ready to ask him to turn around, when you noticed his head already turned and a slight rosy hue crawling up his exposed neck. He was usually so devoid of colour; the splash of pink was a nice touch. You wondered what had flustered him and if it had anything to do with you. The thought made you excited, but you chose not to acknowledge that. 
“I’m changing now,” You said, turning away from him. 
L tried his best to keep his eyes off of you, but soon, your hands were in the air as you peeled off your shirt, and his curiosity won. His eyes traced over the exposed skin, counting the vertebrae up your back. His breath hitched slightly as you reached behind you and unlatched your bra. He caught himself imagining what it would look like if you were turned around and ripped his eyes away again. After all, you were his friend, and it was inappropriate to think such things about a friend. Especially one that trusted him enough to change in front of him. He would rather die than abuse your trust. 
Soon, you were wiggling out of your pants, and his eyes betrayed him, following the movement of your hands. The cotton panties you wore were nothing special, plain and purple and a bit cheeky. It clung to the shape of your ass beautifully. His eyes bugged involuntarily, and he decided he could no longer trust himself to be facing you and turned his body. 
As he faced the wall, he considered your interactions today. You had sought him out and then joined him outside despite knowing the discomfort the cold would bring you. Meaning you valued his amusement more than your comfort. You entertained his tangents and encouraged him to try new things, which meant that his general well-being must be something of importance to you. Why else would you go out of your way to protect it?
Yes, you wanted him to be happy and made that a responsibility of your own. You coached him through a new experience and reassured his insecurities about it. He had hugged you for two minutes and thirty seconds, but you had held him for two minutes and thirty-nine seconds. So you enjoyed the physical comfort, and obviously desired more, as you only stopped when he shocked you. 
That’s right, you pulled away when he asked if you "wanted him." So enjoying his company was fine, but once "wanting" became a part of the equation, you rejected it. Or tried your best to. But you didn’t deny that you still desired his presence, allowing him to escort you to your room, where you took off your clothes in front of him. 
When he looked at the incidents individually, it could all be chalked up to you being a good friend– one who trusted and respected him –but he was a better detective than that. He also knew to look at the big picture. In his mind, he replaced himself with other people, like puppets in a play, and saw how your reactions changed.
He found it hard to believe that you would allow someone else on the team to hold you for two minutes, lure you into the rain, or risk them seeing you in your underwear. Which begged the question, why do you treat him differently? How does your perception of him differ from the others?
Then it became abundantly clear, and he was shocked. The conclusion he came to seemed ludicrous, and yet, it was the only one that made sense-- the only one that stood with the evidence. How could this be? There was only one way to know. 
He called your name and you hummed in response, putting on a new shirt and turning to face him. 
“You evaded my question.” He remarked, still looking at the wall. “However, I think your evasion– and the several events surrounding it –has given me a more clear understanding of the answer you were guarding.”
You felt a general unease, not sure you liked the direction his inquisitive mind was heading. You wrung your hands anxiously in front of you, looking at the back of his head. You should have known L wouldn’t let that go. 
“I told you I didn’t know.”
He turned quickly, catching you off guard. He was once again very close to you, his eyes dancing with curiosity and a bit of pride. It was a look you saw when he presented a theory based on new evidence he had finally made sense of that had previously baffled the team. You knew he was confident in whatever he had deduced and was more amused by your responses, watching carefully with a thumb pressed to his lip just a few inches away from your face. 
“But I don’t think it was the complete truth,” he pressed, “which makes it a lie of omission.”
“I didn’t lie,” You quickly defended. 
“But I saw it: a realisation flitting across your face. You looked at the evidence and came to a conclusion. You have some idea as to why you reacted to my question the way you did, and you have an answer. Does the answer put you in a position of vulnerability perhaps?”
You gaped at him, unsure how to respond. However, he continued to think aloud, answering your question for you with his own ramblings. 
“Yes, that must be it. In answering whether you merely wanted more affection or me, it would force you to admit that you had a need that wasn’t being met. And since we had already discussed our general lack of affection in day-to-day life, revealing that you felt you wanted more hugs would not make you uncomfortable… no, it has to be me that you want. That’s the only reason you would react that way. Which makes me wonder, in what way do you want me?
“My phrasing may have impacted your response, as ‘want’ can mean different things in certain contexts. However, if you thought of me in a strictly platonic sense, you would not have assumed I meant anything more than my company. There is, of course, the possibility that previous interactions in male friendships lead you to believe I meant something else, but I think it is more likely that you interpreted it romantically because you have– on some level –romantic feelings for me. And by answering the question honestly, you would have revealed that.”
He paused for a moment before asking, “Am I right?”
Your brain was spinning, repeating every word he had said. He waited patiently as you mulled it over. You tried to disprove his theory, picking each line and defending the opposite, but it became harder and harder the longer you went on. You weren’t sure how you saw the man in front of you. He was your friend, someone you respected and cared for. You valued his opinion and you listened to his advice. But you couldn’t deny that you found him attractive. You had since you first met him. 
After your friend had died, it didn’t take you long to piece together that it was Kira who killed her. You brought your theory to the police, but they didn’t take you seriously. Apparently, there had been many false reports of Kira's murders, and yours was the fifteenth report that day. You continued to argue, but you didn’t even get past the front desk. That night, when you got back home, you decided you would do everything you could to catch the killer. You broke into the police database– which was entirely too easy –then followed up with everyone they suspected. You used your skills to hack into the suspects' computers, scouring through their histories and files, but didn’t find anything incriminating. Except for one man. 
He was too innocent, not even a record of porn on his computer. Most of his search results were quiz questions with brief breaks spent streaming funny videos. He was a studious pupil and the son of a cop. You consulted the police’s notes often and were surprised when they claimed it could be a student. Then soon after, the pattern of killings changed, further proving the theory.
You were convinced it was Light Yagami, but you needed more. So you tried to hack into L’s computer. You knew from the police notes of the meetings that L called in using a computer, meaning he had to have a Wi-Fi connection to talk to them in real time. It took you a while to hack the secure connection, and even longer to get into the computer. You felt defeated– outsmarted –when you realised the only thing on the device was whatever system he used for the calls and whatever connection he used for that was heavily encrypted. 
You thought nothing more of the event until you were picked up off the street a few weeks later. You were grabbed and bound, the assailant immediately gagging and blindfolding you. The drive was long, and you were taken somewhere with winding hallways and cold rooms. You were restrained to a table, straps keeping you upright, and then your gag was removed. 
You yelled in anger, cursing your capture and illustrating all the ways in which you would make them suffer for treating you this way. You only stopped when a robotic voice filled the room. It asked who you were, but you ignored its question, connecting the dots. 
“You’re L,” You said plainly, “The renowned detective. You’ve solved every case you’ve ever taken on. And you apprehended me– confining me and taking away my vision –meaning you must think I’m Kira. You know who I am, that’s why you’ve taken me in.”
He confirmed your suspicions and listed out the crimes you had committed, and your behaviours that made him suspect you. You couldn’t deny his deductions, and instead of trying to prove your innocence, you told him about your own mission to catch Kira. You even apologised for trying to hack him as well, “but you understand, I had to try.”
He kept you tied up for a few, very long days, then let you walk around the room, giving you access to a bed and a few books. Now and then he would check in on you and offered to make amends for the misunderstanding. You only requested that he hear you out. 
You told him about your theories and how you were disregarded by the police. He was the first person to tell you that he believed your friend was murdered and that it had more to do with them talking out against Kira online than the crimes they had committed. And that only angered you more.
Soon, he began to trust you. He showed you his face. He was nothing like you imagined, but everything you expected. He was odd; he looked almost sickly and was very deadpan. But he had a sense of humour, one that was just as odd as him. He was straightforward forward, and you didn’t have to wonder what he was thinking, as he often shared his thoughts. He was kind, having an obvious affinity for sweets, but always willing to share with you. He asked about you and your life, and you could tell he was cataloguing everything you had to say. He listened so intently when you spoke. 
You only grew closer, looking forward to your meetings in the following weeks, and were elated when he told you about the new headquarters and how he wanted to introduce you to the rest of the team. He was impressed by your resourcefulness and intellect, but more importantly your passion. You were driven by revenge, but soon that changed. L believed in you, and you wanted to honour that. 
Despite his quarks, you saw his soft underside, and it drew you in more. He was fascinating to you, alluring. 
Was that normal for a friend? To simply see them and feel better, to seek out their company? Yeah, you guess it was, but you didn’t think it was as normal to think your friend is pretty. Friends don’t trace jaw lines or let their eyes linger on outstretched fingers and moving lips. Is that what you were feeling? Was your confusion and nervousness a result of an unrealised crush on your friend?
“Oh, I see,” Ryusaki mumbled, “It wasn’t an intentional lie; you only just now realised.”
You hated that he could read you as well as he could, and suddenly his proximity was suffocating. You stepped back, hiding from his gaze in your hands. It was bad enough that you had feelings for your best and only friend, but to come to that realisation in front of them –when they have the uncanny ability to practically read minds –was mortifying. You were cornered and unsure what to say. You didn’t even have time to consider what you wanted to do about your feelings before they were made known. 
You could try to deny it, but you didn’t think that would work. Not against L. So you decided to look deeper. You had pieced together how your interactions proved you liked him, but how did L fare? You compared his behaviour towards you to the others. He was kinder with you, often wording things gentler to you than he would care to for anyone else. He provided confections to everyone, but he only offered you bites from his plate. He was more candid about his feelings with you, as well as his thoughts. 
While he often toyed with the investigators, constantly testing their deductive reasoning and loyalty, L only asked what you thought to question his own conclusions. He valued your input more than others on the team, and you knew the task force was aware of that. if you were in the room, Ryusaki was always within arms reach. He never strayed far. He asked about your personal life, and he encouraged you to take breaks. He smiled and laughed around you, something you didn’t see in front of the others. You had seen L’s soft side, but only because he had shown it to you. He was vulnerable with you. But was that just friendship?
No, no there was more. Today, he cared for you, feeding you and treating you to a picnic. He apologised for your condition, completely disregarding his own. He did his best to atone for the wrong he felt he had done, going as far as to wrap you in his own warmth. He didn’t need to. He sought out the contact. Contact he didn’t look for elsewhere. Contacted he requested and asked for more of, in a less than graceful way. Tripping over words was out of character for the normally articulate detective. 
He then stayed by your side, escorting you to your room, again, disregarding the fact that he too was cold and rained on. Furthermore, any other friend would have turned away from you while you changed, but he faced you. You remembered the blush on his face before you changed. Either the idea of you undressing or something he saw you were changing into caused that response. You had difficulty believing this came from a general lack of experience with women. 
If Misa changed in front of him (which is an unavoidable event which has already happened with her room being monitored the way it is), you doubted he would have much of a reaction. Yes, you were sure. His flustered state was a result of you. 
You removed your hands from your face and looked at the man of your affection. He wore a curious look, and you smiled. 
“You’re not upset,” he observed, “Usually, people respond badly to my blunt deductions about their emotions. I expected you to yell or deny, but you’ve done neither.”
You chuckled lightly, “I don’t think there’s a way I could have denied that without further confirming your conclusion.”
“Well, your initial response of hiding from me was sufficient.” he said with a bit of smugness, “But I’m curious as to why you no longer feel the need to.”
“I don’t need to hide my feelings if you already know they exist,” you stated calmly, “And I’m sixty-seven percent sure you share my feelings, making them much less frightening.”
Rysuaki’s hidden eyebrows raised, and his eyes widened. You watched smugly as he said nothing, revelling in the pride of shocking even the great L.
You explained how you reached that conclusion, knowing that would be his first question. When you finished, he looked up to the ceiling, reevaluating the evidence. You watched as his careful mind picked apart your deduction and this time you allowed yourself to appreciate his unique beauty.
You traced the slope of his nose, following it down to the tendons in his neck and where his collar bones poked out from his baggy sweater. You greedily observed the way his clothes hung from his body, nearly swallowing him whole. 
“It is true, I am rather fond of you. I made that more obvious than I intended, however, there’s nothing to be done about it now.” He admitted, “I can’t say I’ve ever had much of a love life or much experience with romantic feelings. I’m not sure how to proceed.”
You patted the spot next to you on the bed, and he crossed the room to join you. To your surprise, he sat with his feet on the floor, hands on his thighs. 
“I think this a good place to start,” you said warmly. “We don’t have to do anything about it yet.”
He nodded but didn’t look at you. You could see the gears churning in his head, then you noticed his hands. There were impressions left in his thighs from his strong grip. Was it possible he was nervous? You couldn’t hide the delight the sight brought you. You thought it was adorable that you were something that could cause him so much grief. But you hated it too. 
You placed your hand on his and he tensed slightly, but didn’t push it away. 
“Hey,” you said softly, “Take a breath. Really, I don’t want you to stress over this. You have enough on your plate.”
He looked at your hand, his face level, silently assessing, and you allowed him the space to do so. His hand twitched a bit under yours before he turned it over, his palm meeting yours and his slender fingers weaving between your digits. 
“What if-” he paused, as if not sure he should say what he was thinking. He took a breath as you instructed, then continued. “What if I want to do something about it?”
You couldn’t contain the smile that spread across your face, and you didn’t feel a need to. 
“Then I would ask what you wanted to do.”
"It's not about what I want." He looked at you, eyes wide and panicked. “What if doing something is stupid and puts you in danger?”
You had never seen L so worked up before, and you were stunned for a moment. You realised he was letting you in, even more than before. He was letting you see his fear, something you're not sure he’s shown anyone willingly. And in this moment, you were reminded that he was just a young man. That his life had barely begun. Yet he had seen horrors you couldn’t imagine. 
“If Light is Kira,” he continued, through gritted teeth. “then you are already endangered enough. But if our relationship is now romantic, he may use you to get to me. He would have no problem killing you if it brought him closer to his goal, and we both know that.”
“Ryusaki…” you tried, rubbing your thumb against the back of his cold, clammy hand. “He already knows I care for you. The others have been teasing me about my favouritism for months now. If he thought I knew anything, or that you would tell me anything, he would have already done it. If he could, he'd probably force me to write your name in the book somehow, so he didn’t have to do it himself.” 
The fire in his eyes fizzled, and now he looked deflated again as if his anger was the only thing giving him the energy to fight. 
“Then, I can’t tell you anything,” he concluded, “and that doesn’t make for a very strong relationship. One of secrecy where I’m forced to keep you at a distance…no that won’t do.”
He let go of your hand, looking away and rising to his feet. You felt that familiar tug in your heart, the one you felt at your desk when you realised he wasn’t beside you, the same feeling when he tried to end the hug. It felt like he was leaving you, and this time, it made you angry.
“Fuck that!” you said a little harsher than you intended. L turned to look at you in surprise; you had never raised your voice to him before (Aside from that time he arrested you and you didn’t know it was him you were cursing). “I refuse to let Kira make any decisions for me. That bastard doesn’t get to stop me from doing anything I want. And I want this, I’ll fight for it.”
You spoke with a vicious resolve, and L had to admit, it was intriguing. 
“I’m done letting him ruin my life. I’m taking charge. I know there’s a way to prove it, to get him to confess. We can do it. We’ll catch that monster and frame his head on the wall.”
L was studying you; you could see it in his analytical eyes. 
“‘Monster’ you say…” he wonders aloud, “There are many types of monsters; the one we face now... he’s a lying monster: He’s cunning, posing as a human, though having no understanding of the human heart. He works hard, but only to appease his own hubris. He seeks friendship even though he does not truly know how to love. I had once said, If I were to encounter such a monster, I would likely be eaten by them... because, in truth, I am that monster.”
He locks eyes with you, his gaze resolute.
“Tell me, honestly, how can you hate Kira and care for me? We are the same beast.” His body towered over yours, the shadows of the light obscuring his face under his hair. He was almost intimidating. “I do not fight for justice but my own amusement. How many lives have I disregarded all because I didn’t find the case challenging enough? How many people have I endangered solving this one? I allowed who I believed to be Kira intimate knowledge of the case, all because I thought it made the game more fun. I view people as disposable, just as Kira does, and manipulate them just as freely. Kira and I are cut from the very same cloth. Yet, you despise him and respect me.”
Your stare was hard and unforgiving. Rage shook your body, and L was sure that you had changed your mind. You hated him now, just as you should. 
“No,” You said sternly, “You can lie to yourself all you want, but I won’t allow you to lie to me.”
You carefully lifted his chin, forcing him to hear you. 
“You are flawed, yes. You certainly have an ego, but that doesn’t make you a monster. If you were presented with the power of the death note, you wouldn’t use it to make yourself a god. You don’t always fight fair, but the criminals you chase don’t either, and it would be silly to try for the high road. That is what makes you such a great detective. You do what needs to be done. But that’s not why I care about you.”
You saw a flicker of surprise on his face before he buried it once again. 
“I care for you. Not L, the world’s greatest detective. I care for the man who treats me kindly and listens to my woes. I care for the man who checks in to make sure I’ve eaten and taken breaks. I care for the man who is so terrified of himself, he hides away from the world. I care for the man who was cursed with a brilliant mind and raised in a world of evil. I don’t care that you’re a genius, I’d love you dumb. I’m not interested in what you can do for me. I just want you.”
You watched as the man closed his eyes, unable to face your reverent judgment. 
“You could step away right now, and I’d never think less of you. You could imprison Light, right or wrong, and I would stand by you. You could tell me that you don’t want this, and I wouldn’t fight you.” You moved your hand from his chin to rest against his cheek. “But if you bow down to Kira– admit defeat when your heart is still beating –I’ll never forgive you.”
His eyes snapped open, and he scanned your face, looking for a lie, but found one. 
“We live in a world where gods of death are real,” you continued, “And that knowledge has made me realise even more that nothing in life is guaranteed. Nothing other than your own resolve. I chose life, and I wish you would choose the same.”
“You speak as if I am trying to kill myself.” he scrutinised. 
“Since the arrest of Higuchi, you’ve stopped investigating," You pressed, "but we both know it’s not because you think we’ve stopped Kira. There’s still a second notebook- a second Kira. And I’m sure you’ve noticed the change in Yagami, almost as if coming in contact with the book has turned him back into Kira. I see the way he looks at you, the way he studies you. Don’t tell me you haven’t noticed.”
“I have,” he confirmed.
“Then why? Why have you stopped trying to catch him? If he is actively trying to catch you– to kill you –and you do nothing to stop it, you are killing yourself. You’re allowing him to win. And I can’t– no, I won’t catch him without you.”
“You wouldn’t avenge me?” He asked curiously. 
“I’m here for my own selfish reasons,” you reminded him, “If you die, then everyone I have left will have been taken by Kira. What motivation would I have left to stop him?”
“I see…” he said flatly, “so if Kira is to be caught, we must both live to see it happen.” 
“Yes, but more so, I would blame you for your death. Avenging you wouldn’t be possible, as you and your killer would be one and the same. I would hate you.”
His hand joined yours, guiding it away from his face and holding it at his side.
“I’m not sure I could rest knowing you hated me. Not when you’re the only person I trust and the only person I can say I’ve ever cared for– besides Watari, of course,” He said softly, “But in all honesty, I’m not sure what to make of it. I can’t control you, and I have no desire to, but allowing you to grow any closer to me is dangerous. And I would hate myself if anything happened to you.”
His fingers traced over the creases in your hand as he spoke, memorising the fate lines. 
“But I can’t deny the attachment I have for you.” he continued, “It clouds my judgement, and I spend valuable time constantly correcting it. I’ve been indulging in delusions of running away with you. Taking you far away from the danger, placing you in a secure palace where you want for nothing, allowing you to lose yourself in all the simple pleasures your poetic mind can conjure. I would rather collect a list of books for your library than face Kira at the moment.”
You felt like crying, his words striking your heart. While it was easy to deduce that he favoured you over the others, such a blatant confession wasn’t something you expected. You knew this fantasy was built in his mind as something to make you happy, but you knew that this was something he wanted as well. To live a life of ease, not as a pawn to world governments. To be free to have intelligence and not be weaponised. You realised then, he was tired. He was exhausted from chasing Kira, exhausted from comparing himself to the enemy. 
“Let’s get out of here then.”
He looked at you curiously. 
“You can afford a break, a real one. Your mind is scattered, and you can’t possibly expect to outsmart Kira if you’re worrying about everything else.” You explained, “I’ll talk to Watari about planning a secure getaway for you but for now…”
You softly grabbed his hand and led him towards the door, “We’re going to your room so you can change. Then we’ll discuss what we’re doing for the night.”
He allowed you to lead him down the hall, saying nothing while you travelled. He only spoke again after you stepped into his room. 
“I am not often surprised,” he marveled “But you continue to amaze me. I can’t predict you. You’re courageous and strong-willed, but always kind. You’re extremely brilliant, but you’re humble about it. But most amazingly, you believe in me– not because of what I’ve done, but because of who I am –and I’ve never met someone who could separate the two.”
You flush under his praise, “You say you can’t predict me, but I swear, you see right through me.”
“I’m sorry,” he said with panic in his eyes, “I didn’t mean to upset you.”
You laughed, the sound affecting L more than he expected. He loved it, loved making you laugh. He wanted to do it as much as possible, but that was something to figure out later. 
“You didn’t,” you reassured, “but I do have something you can do to make it up to me,”
L smirked, knowing you were teasing him. 
“I don’t understand. I didn’t offend, but you claim I need to make amends.”
“You don’t have to. It’s completely up to you.”
“What is it you would have me do?”
You didn’t answer with words, instead spreading your arms and then making a grabby motion towards him. Your smile was soft, gently pulling at your lips. 
“Yes,” he said sweetly, “I suppose we could both use a boost of oxytocin.”
He took slow steps towards you, and then all at once, his arms were around your waist. He pulled you into him, lifting you slightly off the ground, bringing your neck to his hung head. You felt goosebumps where his nose nuzzled into your skin and your heart grew wings, soaring. You held L just as tightly, indulging in his desperate touch and burying your nose into his silky hair. 
“I think we should revise our previous agreement about hugs.” He said after a moment, speaking into your throat. 
“What amendments would you like to make?”
“I think four hugs a day is fine, but I don’t think we should limit ourselves to that. We do need to make up for our lack of hugs in the past after all. Furthermore,” he lifted his head slowly, so as not to knock you in the nose. He would feel horrible for that. “I think we could add or substitute hugs for other forms of affection as well.”
You hummed, and he continued. 
“For instance, you have held my hand twice today, and both times, I felt a similar sort of comfort from the action. In fact, I’ve noticed any skin-to-skin contact with you eases me. Your hand on my face proved that. I tested this theory twice. Once, before our confessions, on the blanket. I placed my hand on the one you had placed on my shoulder. Then again, in your room, by simply touching your hand, tracing your palm instead of holding it. Both yielded similar results.”
You smiled at him fondly, your hands reaching up to play with his hair. As your nails skated across his scalp in lazy circles, his eyes fluttered a bit, his lids resting heavier. 
“So you would like to add hand-holding? I’m fine with that.”
Your sweet voice flooded his mind, and your hands liberated his composure. 
“Either you’re completely clueless to the effect you have on me,” he whispered, “Or you revel in it. And I’m not sure which is more terrifying.”
Your heart skipped a beat, which startled L for a moment, but then he realised it was because of an emotional response and not an attack from Kira. 
“I wonder the same about you.”
L was unfamiliar with the look in your eyes. Your pupils were dilated, and your irises sparkled in the light. He’s never been looked at like that before. Your face looked brighter, and your body language (while restricted in your current position in his arms) was relaxed; open. And suddenly, he was entranced by your lips. You were talking, and he studied the muscles as they moved, unable to focus on anything else. He felt the urge to kiss you, and this shocked him. He forced himself to pay attention to your words. 
“...besides you have all the power really. I know what I want, but if you don’t want me there’s nothing I can do about it. I could never kill you, but even if Kira forced my hand, I don’t know your name. And you’re the only one on the team who knows mine. Whether I like it or not, my heart is in your hands.”
“I would never hurt you,” he quickly defended, almost offended. 
“I know,” you said simply, “That’s why I trust your hands.”
Your gaze was unwavering, your stance absolute. The emotions L tried to contain began stirring restlessly. He no longer felt like he had a hold on them. A hurricane of feelings he couldn’t quite name tore through his chest, and he didn’t know what else to do but act. He surged forward, pressing his lips to yours. It was awkward and brief, as neither of you puckered your lips, just touched them together. He kept his watchful eyes wide as he did so, gauging your response. 
“Was that a kiss?” You finally asked once your silent shock was replaced by a highly amused smile. 
A small frown overtook L’s face. “I fear if you had to ask…” 
His sentence trailed off as he sat you back down on the ground. Then turned to walk to his closet. His was much larger than yours (which was ironic given he wore the same clothes for days straight), and you assumed he elected to change there when he closed the door. Now that he was out of sight, you allowed your excitement to show, jumping up and down and shaking your hands. 
He had kissed you, almost. It was obvious that he didn't have the experience, but your heart swelled at the thought that he wanted those experiences with you. And he did kiss you, he held you in his arms, for no other reason than to hold you close.
You tried your best to calm down, but your bright smile would fool no one. Instead, you tried to focus your attention elsewhere, calling Watari. He had given you his number (or a number) months ago. He told you it was because he saw that you cared for his son and that his son trusted you. He also confessed that he was rather fond of you too. He wanted to see you make it out of this investigation. 
He answered almost immediately. 
“Hello, Ms Ogawa,” He was always careful to use your alias, even if he knew you were alone. “I notice that you’re calling from within headquarters, are you alright?”
“Yes, I’m fine. I was calling because I convinced Ryusaki to take some time off. I need you to plan a trip for him, no shorter than a week but something that’s easily extendable.”
The old man chuckled on the other end of the line. 
“You convinced him to take a break? I didn’t think anyone was capable; I wonder how you managed.” He seemed amused, implying he knew something through his old man wisdom. 
“I’m not entirely certain I did,” L emerged from the closet, looking nearly identical, just less soggy. You smiled at him as he made his way towards you. “But I’ll be very cross with him if he doesn’t. I think he knows that.”
The man you spoke of raised a single eyebrow as if to say, “Oh really?”
You made a similar face that left no room for argument. 
“I see,” Watari continued, “Shall I book this trip for one or two?”
You couldn’t hide your surprise at the question. You didn’t know how to answer. You didn’t have to though as L decided then to grab the phone from your hand, pinching it awkwardly between his fingers. 
“Two,” he replied on your behalf. “We’ll also need a cover so that the others don’t know we’re together.”
“Understood. How soon would you like to leave?”
L returned the phone to you, trusting your decision. 
“We’ll leave tomorrow. We have plans for tonight, and I’d like to rest beforehand.”
“That’s very wise, Ms Ogawa. I’ll send over the itinerary soon.”
“Thank you, Watari.”
You hung up, placing your phone back in your pocket. When you looked up, L’s hand was extended, offering you a sweater. 
“If you intend to go out,” he explained, “You’ll need a sweater.”
You took it gratefully, and he turned his head again, giving you space to change. When you finished pulling the shirt over your head, he looked up and felt like he had swallowed his tongue. He never anticipated that seeing you in his clothes would affect him this way. He was truly smitten by you, and that was something he could no longer deny. 
“Ready?” You asked, disrupting his train of thought. 
He nodded, and you offered him your hand. A small smile spread across his face as he took it. He trusted your hands too, he realised. 
You reached the garage, selecting an inconspicuous sedan for your ventures. L moved to open the door when you stopped him. 
“Wait!” Your heart was in your throat, but you closed your eyes and forced out the words. “My favourite flowers are poppies. I think it’s cool how versatile they are. The moon absolutely amazes me. I understand how its gravitational pull affects our tides, but I still can’t wrap my mind around it. I also really like The Smiths, which raises conflicting feelings in me because I hate Morrison as a person, but man, if he isn’t great as crying into a microphone.”
You heard a soft chuckle and felt a hand reach out to hold your bicep. You took a deep breath, continuing with Ryusaki’s encouragement. 
“I prefer a good milkshake over any other dessert. I think time travel is probably the coolest superpower, but I think it’s too great a power that I wouldn’t trust myself with it. I like cats, but I’ve always wanted a pet raccoon. I don’t think I could get one, morally, but they just look so cute. If I had one, I would love that little guy so much. I would give him a really pretentious name; find a way to grant him Lordship.”
You opened your eyes slowly to see Ryusaki smiling, his thumb tracing circles on your arm. His eyes darted around your face, twinkling in city lights. His heart pounded harder with every word you uttered. Romance was never something he prioritised in his life, it wasn’t something he ever saw happening. Most people were put off by him, and it wasn’t often that he actually met people in his work. He could have lived the rest of his life hiding behind a computer screen, an imperceivable entity known only to one man. But now, he would give anything to stand in the sun with you while you look at him the way you do now. Affection and amnesty dripping from your gaze. 
“I’d like to try and kiss you again,” he said timidly. “If you’d show me how.”
Your smile split your face, feeling overjoyed by his words. Each move you made, he mirrored, hands on cheeks and bodies touching as he matched your steps forward. You jumped up on your tiptoes, pressing a quick kiss to his lips. Ryusaki’s eyes widened comically, and a hand rose to his lips as if he’d find your kiss there. But soon, his shock dissipated, replaced by a look of hunger. 
This time, he led, dropping a hand to your waist to hold you close and using his other to lift your chin. He moved in so slowly, and your body thrummed with the anticipation of contact. He stopped, his lips barely grazing yours, and you couldn’t hide your desperate tremble when you felt his soft breath against your own. He pressed his puckered lips against yours, and you took no time reciprocating. 
You brought a hand to the back of his neck, guiding him and pulling him closer. You felt like you were flying, your heart beating its feathered wings against your ribcage. You pulled your lips away just to bring them back, and you could feel his confidence growing as he tilted his head and his grip on your waist grew tighter. You began moving your lips against his, testing the waters. The rhythm was awkward at first, but he caught it soon enough. 
His chest was rising and falling quickly against you, and he brought his hands up to hold your face. You lost yourself in his touch, in the way he clung to you. You were being consumed and felt no dire to run from it. He caught your bottom lip between his teeth, and you gasped. 
Your eyelids flutter as your brain caught up to what was happening around you. Ryusaki was no longer kissing you but carefully cataloguing the look on your face in his mind. He was reviewing everything he did and how you reacted to it. He had decided that he loved kissing you, and he wanted you to love it too. He wanted love to be something you associated with him, especially now that he knew his brain was making a similar connection. He knew it was probably too soon to say something like that, but he could wait. He would wait forever if he had to. He had the brightest star in the sky in his palms, and he didn’t intend to let this shooting star fall from his grasp. 
You were seeing sides of L that you never thought you would, ones you never thought to look for. He held you like a precious stone, something sacred. He looked at you like you were a wonder to behold, the eighth wonder of the world. It made it hard to breathe, suffocated by his silent adoration. 
“So, where are we going this evening?” He asked from high above. 
“I don’t know,” you said breathlessly, “but we have all of Tokyo, I’m sure we’ll find something.”
He loved this look on you. The joy in your eyes, the lack of stress in your muscles. Your glee was infectious, and he didn’t mind it. 
“As long as you’re by my side, I think anything would do.”
He testingly laid a kiss on your forehead as he said it, and you felt like you would melt to the floor in a pile of goo. You removed a hand from his neck, resting it on his, and were delighted when he instantly intertwined your fingers. 
“Well, I’m not going anywhere, Ryu-”
“Lawliet,” He interjected. You tilt your head, confused, and L does his best not to swoon as you rest your head in his hand on your cheek. “My name is Lawliet.”
You break out into a blinding grin, and Lawiet knows then that smile was the sunlight he was meant to bask in. Those were the rays that would light his darkest nights. The beams that would guide him through the intricate maze of life. 
He had found all he needed. A friend who listens to his grief and grievances. One who cares enough to try and understand his mind and soothe it at the same time. Not for her own convenience, but for his betterment; never pushing the boundary of discomfort but bringing thrill to the change. He found a fresh pair of eyes, for when his get dull and tired, to show him the artistry outside of the ghastly monstrosities he and the world bathed in. A person brave enough to show up, even on the bad days. The whole world could fit in his palms when he held you like this. 
“I’m not going anywhere, Lawliet.” you corrected.
L smiled, squeezing your hands three times. You returned the sentiment with a kiss to the hand you held in your own. 
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I hope you enjoyed the read! Like I said, I don't think I'll do much writing for L, but I really enjoyed this. I hope even if you don't have as much love for this character as I do, you can still get something out of it :))
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