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Payback
Dom!Xavier Thorpe x Female OC smut
WARNING! If you are under 18 yrs old, do not read this piece. I do not take responsibility for anything if you proceed.
Masterlist is pinned on my blog. Check it out cuz I can't link it.
This takes place after Hop-frogs win the Poe Cup - timeline not specified.
Valerye was sure she and the Ophelia Hall would win this year. So sure in fact, she offhandedly made a bet with her boyfriend Xavier. It was quite simple - if he won, she would be his to order around for the rest of the day. But this wouldn't happen of course, because she's not going to lose... Right? The thing is, she didn't expect the motivation it gave Xavier to prove her wrong. And, oh boy, he did way more to her.
Turns out, her submissive partner was not-so-submissive that night.
Valerye was standing in the middle of her dorm room in a gobsmacked silence. She could feel the heat rising to her cheeks, her heart racing, as the realisation of the consequences of the bet she made with Xavier before the Poe Cup were gradually dawning on her. And it seemed Xavier was immensely enjoying her despair.
“You want me to do what?” She breathed, shivers trickling down her spine.
He was still in the jester costume, hat in hand, leaning against the wall with a self-satisfied smirk on his painted face.
“I won. On your terms, may I remind you.” He took a few steps towards her and threw the clown hat onto the bed, freeing his hands. When he looked back at her, there was something in his eyes that made her breath shaky. Something that made her feel the heat creep around her back and neck, nesting between her legs. However, she straightened and looked him back in the eye, challenging him. She was the dominant one. No way in hell she would give in that easily.
“So?”
He stopped right before her, making her strain her neck to keep looking at him. She barely reached his shoulders. He lowered himself to her level, his breath fanning her neck, making her stifle a sigh of pleasure. His long fingers ghosted her shoulder, leaving goosebumps where they touched her hot skin. A few loose hairs escaped from his bun and tickled the side of her face.
Just a few nights ago, she was pulling at them, exposing his long neck for her to bite while she was riding him on the floor of his art studio. He was falling apart underneath her, needy and whiny, desperately bucking his hips and begging to finally let him cum. She could see the bitemarks she left on his neck despite the layer of white paint covering it.
And yet, somehow she knew Xavier Thorpe wasn’t about to plead to torture him like that right now.
“So you better get out of those clothes, kitten. Surely, you don’t want to break the promise, do you?” She felt his teeth graze her earlobe and she moaned quietly before she could stop herself. She knew he had his signature smirk plastered on his face again, clearly proud of his effect on her. She huffed, exasperated by his sudden boldness. She didn’t like taking orders, she never had to take orders like this from him, but her pride didn’t let her back down. She most certainly would not break a promise.
He went to sit down in a chair beside a full-length mirror, watching her undress. His smile didn’t falter under her annoyed gaze - on the contrary. A wide grin spread across his face, the clown paint making him look wicked.
He motioned for her to come closer. Valerye frowned - he was still in his costume. He patted his thigh before she could open her mouth to ask what the hell he was playing at. She pursed her lips, feeling more embarrassed by the second, but she sat down on his long legs, completely naked. He purred contentedly, his hands caressing her arms and chest, placing wet, open mouthed kisses along the line of her jawline, neck and underneath her ears, the way he knew would make her lean into him for more. And this is exactly what he needed.
He swiftly turned her body around, pushing her back flush against his chest and sunk his teeth into the side of her neck, making her yelp in surprise. Before she registered what was going on, she had either leg hooked over his knees and he spread them wide, locking her in place.
There she was, fully nude and completely exposed on her boyfriend’s lap, unable to close her legs, looking at herself in the full-length mirror in front of them. She felt herself go red in the face, earning another smirk from Xavier.
“Don’t tell me you’re shy now.” He feigned worry, teasing her skin with the tips of his fingers, grazing over her most sensitive areas. “I want to see you whole.”
She moaned softly at his words, and then louder whimpers formed in her throat when she felt his mouth on a particular sweet spot at the base of her shoulder. And with that, his hands travelled down her body, working their magic on her hardened nipples, one going even further to rub her clit. She stiffened against him with her mouth agape, moaning breathlessly as he picked up the pace.
“God, you’re so fucking wet”, he groaned into her neck, nipping at her in all the right places.
Soon, she was wailing desperately under his touch, back arched into him, hyperventilating. His skilled fingers worked mercilessly on her sensitive, now swollen clit. She couldn’t think of anything, her mind going blank in and out again, desperately wanting to reach the sweet release. She inched towards it, slowly, moving against his palm when suddenly, she was past the point of no return. And Xavier felt it too, the way her body went rigid, when she got incredibly hot to the touch and almost stopped breathing. His breath got caught in his throat too, his eyes going wide, looking at Valerye’s reaction in the mirror in front, wishing to remember every single detail about this image. He could feel his dick straining against the material of the costume.
She came undone, moaning throatily, and he felt his hand getting soaked in hot fluid. His brain stopped working for a second, processing what had just happened. He blinked, looking down to find a small clear puddle at his feet. Valerye sensed his body tensed behind her, heard him inhaling through his teeth.
“Oh my god, I’m so sorry, I–”
She met his eyes in the mirror - his pupils blown out, eyes wide and unblinking. He looked insane with this clown like face paint for a moment. And suddenly, he resumed, rubbing her with much more vigour, breathing quickly against her ear.
“Do it again,” he growled, growing even harder with every moment. He wanted to see it again, to feel how much she couldn’t control herself from the pleasure he was giving her. However, she kept shifting back and forth, squealing and whimpering, trying to avoid his fingers. It was too much for her to endure, the hot jolts coursing through her body almost painful, she was so overstimulated.
He grasped her face and forced her head hard towards him.
“Again!” He snarled, his eyes lustful and demanding, looking even more deranged with the creepy, smudged jester makeup on. Something caught his eye right next to her head and a wide, sinister looking grin slowly spread on his face.
“...or I will make you.”
Valerye’s breath hitched in her throat when she realised what he meant. She told him about her toys on several occasions but never actually used one with him - and right now he was looking at one. A very particular one - the one she intended to use on him tonight, if he lost the race - as he was supposed to. The one charging in plain sight on her bedside table. The one capable of the most intense torture, the one able to make her, force her to cum in mere seconds on one of the lowest levels. And by the looks of it, he knew what it could do as well. His knowing smile, accentuated by the red lines of his makeup, told her he must’ve googled "the magic wand" - surely more than once. This fucker. Her body started to tremble in anxious anticipation. Excitement mixed with fear and desire made her skin break out in goosebumps. She knew for sure she wouldn't be able to stand the intensity of it all.
“Xavier”, her voice small and shaky, embarrassment written all over her red cheeks. She squeaked pitifully when his fingers brushed her swollen clit, as he hitched his knees higher, making it impossible for her to stand up on her own now. “I can’t take this, it’s too much–”
“Too much already? After just one orgasm? Ooh no,” he cooed mockingly, “my poor, poor vixen. Too bad you have no say in this tonight.” He kept toying with her, sliding her sensitive nub between his slick, skillful fingers, deaf to her pitiful pleading. Without a warning, he grabbed her by her throat with his free hand - forcefully enough to drive the point across. “And now. Do. It. Again.”
Valerye’s eyes went wide with shock as she inhaled sharply through gritted teeth. His large palm clasped around her neck, covering it entirely, obstructed the airflow enough to make her slightly dizzy. She hated not being in control. She was always the one who dictated the rules, who made Xavier crumble under her touch, not the other way around. But now, her mind gradually escaped her once again, more and more with each time he licked and kissed her neck in just the right places and each time his fingers repeatedly stroked her oh so overly sensitive clit, she couldn’t fight it anymore. She knew she was at his mercy, completely defenceless against him. She absolutely loved and hated every second of it. And the new, ungodly sounds forming in her constricted throat were only sealing her fate further.
Xavier’s eyes bore into her in the mirror, savoring every inch of the reflection it provided. Her naked body, fully on display for him. There she was, dripping wet because of him, legs spread wide just for him. The way she writhed on top of his thighs, almost crying from overstimulation, made him want to push her down into the floor and rail her swollen pussy raw. He relished in the friction her bucking hips provided through his costume and the sweet, desperate sounds escaping her lips, mixed with oh god, too much, and I can’t on repeat. Even now, Valerye made his head clouded with lust.
Xavier bit her neck again to steady his mind. No, not now. He wanted to pay her back for all those times she made him cry and beg for relief. He wanted to drive her to the point of madness, the same way she did when she kept ruining his orgasms over and over again. He wanted to make her babble incoherently, his name the only thing etched in her barely conscious mind, exactly like she did it with him, time and time again. And most importantly, he wanted her to squirt on him, again and again, and again. But he had to make sure.
“Do you want to use the safeword?”
Even now, a burning flame of pride rose in Valerye’s heaving chest. He never used it and she didn’t want to either. He slowed his movements, giving her enough time to glare at him in the mirror. He had this stupid smirk on his clown-painted face that always made her go weak in the knees. She pursed her lips into a thin line, not wanting to admit she wanted more of this torture, not wanting to fuel his now overly inflated ego. He chuckled, seeing her prideful stare. Not for long.
“Hm?” He inquired. Without breaking eye contact, he slowly brought his slick covered fingers towards his mouth and licked them clean, humming with pleasure. He knew how much she loved his tongue on her. “You always taste so good, Val.”
This was enough for her. She whimpered, a pained expression on her face and pleaded quietly.
“What was that? Didn’t catch that.”
“Are you really going to make me beg?” You fucking dick, Valerye thought.
“Oh, absolutely.” Xavier smiled widely, clearly enjoying the power he held over her.
She took a deep breath.
“Xavi, please…”
“Yes?” He reached towards the nightstand, raising his eyebrows to indicate he was expecting more of her. Valerye swallowed hard, eyeing the toy in his hand.
“...I want more.”
“Uh-huh.”
“Please.”
“Uh-hm..?”
This absolute fucking dick. He obviously tried very hard not to grin and she was seconds away from losing her mind.
“Xavier, please, I want you, make me cum for you, please. I’m begging you.”
His fingers dug in the flesh of her thighs at those words. He steadied himself, breathing slowly and doing everything in his power not to push his throbbing cock inside her this second.
“I’d love to, Valerye.” He groaned.
She felt the tip of the toy touch her exposed clit. Before she could brace herself for what’s to come, he turned it on. And she lost her mind to the absolute forceful pleasure the vibrator provided. A strangled scream came out of her throat as she kicked, writhed and cried, trying to get away from his hands and this overwhelming pleasure. He wasn’t having it.
The mind numbing vibrations stopped for a second. She felt herself slip from Xavier’s thighs onto the chair, just to have her legs hitched up and pinned at both sides of her head, as he latched his mouth onto her incredibly soft and swollen pussy. But this sweet break didn’t last very long either. Even stronger vibrations were now biting at her clit, making her wail like if she was possessed. She felt as if she was on fire and was about to burst into actual flames, when she felt the orgasm. A second later it hit her like a ton of bricks, making her spasm and writhe and squirt. She heard a stifled hoarse moaning that wasn’t her own from between her legs. And when she opened her eyes, Xavier was hunched over her, panting like a feral dog, fighting with the pants of the costume. His face was soaked wet because of her, face paint running down his neck and dripping at his front. He didn’t seem to notice, too blinded by the wild lust he felt right now. He wanted Val to wet his face again but he couldn’t fight himself anymore. He needed to be inside her. Right. Now.
She felt him push his hard cock forcefully inside her, stretching her wonderfully. She was so wet she didn’t need any time adjusting - and thankfully so, because Xavier just simply lost control.
Her mind went haywire. The immense pleasure occupied every single part of her body, making her babble incoherently, slurring a mix of 'yes', 'fuck', 'god' and 'Xavier' was driving him closer and closer to his own release. He couldn’t think straight, his hips pounding her in feverish, animalistic almost, frenzy, hitting all the sweet spots that made her see sparks before her eyes. And then, she came again, screaming his name, scratching his arms, chest and back, pulling him into his own release right after her own.
Xavier Thorpe savoured every part of the image that was present before his eyes. Valerye, spread on the bedsheets, entangled with him in a blissful embrace, was slowly slipping into uncosciousness, feebly reciprocating his kisses. It was truly the most beautiful payback he could ever wish for.
#xavier thorpe#xavier thorpe x oc#xavier thorpe smut#xavier smut#xavier thorpe fanfic#xavier thorpe jester#xavier thorpe jester costume#xavier thorpe clown makeup#oh no he's hot#how the turn tables#dom!xavier thorpe#dom!xavier#mentions of sub!xavier#part of a series mayhaps?#or a whole story in the making?#i don't know how into tumblr#oh my here we go
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unfortunately my dunmeshi welfare vision is an unusually catty kabru. practise safe binding my friends
(笨蛋 = dumbass, idiot, dimwit, etc.)
#dungeon meshi#dunmeshi#kabru of utaya#art#my stuff#thinly veiled attempt to find more people Please i want to find mutuals#i don't know how this tumblr networking business works#kabru dungeon meshi
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bring back zooterkins, the best 17th-century swear word
I don't normally do Just Characters Swearing, but. ...this kind of wrote itself and then wouldn't leave my head. it comes from both a piece of character-writing advice that has always stuck with me, and also my conviction that Leona is 1000% funnier as a character if his dialogue has to stay G-rated. let Kalim say fuck, but don't let Leona say bastard.
(I'm sorry)
#art#twisted wonderland#(sort of atemporally somewhere between episodes 6 and 7?)#(i - i wanted that lilia joke okay)#long post#tumblr went 'you can post up to 30 images now :)' and i was like well okay then#anyway once again i'm sorry#i'd say i don't know why i did this but actually it is because i wanted kalim to scandalize everyone#i tried to keep it...you know...tasteful. a tasteful amount of fucks.#hey remember how the framing premise for the original birthday interviews was that yuu worked for the school paper#because i have never forgotten. in my head they are still getting up to all kinds of wacky reporting hijinks.
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because sometimes there are invisible tests and invisible rules and you're just supposed to ... know the rule. someone you thought of as a friend asks you for book recommendations, so you give her a list of like 30 books, each with a brief blurb and why you like it. later, you find out she screenshotted the list and send it out to a group chat with the note: what an absolute freak can you believe this. you saw the responses: emojis where people are rolling over laughing. too much and obsessive and actually kind of creepy in the comments. you thought you'd been doing the right thing. she'd asked, right? an invisible rule: this is what happens when you get too excited.
you aren't supposed to laugh at your own jokes, so you don't, but then you're too serious. you're not supposed to be too loud, but then people say you're too quiet. you aren't supposed to get passionate about things, but then you're shy, boring. you aren't supposed to talk too much, but then people are mad when you're not good at replying.
you fold yourself into a prettier paper crane. since you never know what is "selfish" and what is "charity," you give yourself over, fully. you'd rather be empty and over-generous - you'd rather eat your own boundaries than have even one person believe that you're mean. since you don't know what the thing is that will make them hate you, you simply scrub yourself clean of any form of roughness. if you are perfect and smiling and funny, they can love you. if you are always there for them and never admit what's happening and never mention your past and never make them uncomfortable - you can make up for it. you can earn it.
don't fuck up. they're all testing you, always. they're tolerating you. whatever secret club happened, over a summer somewhere - during some activity you didn't get to attend - everyone else just... figured it out. like they got some kind of award or examination that allowed them to know how-to-be-normal. how to fit. and for the rest of your life, you've been playing catch-up. you've been trying to prove that - haha! you get it! that the joke they're telling, the people they are, the manual they got- yeah, you've totally read it.
if you can just divide yourself in two - the lovable one, and the one that is you - you can do this. you can walk the line. they can laugh and accept you. if you are always-balanced, never burdensome, a delight to have in class, champagne and glittering and never gawky or florescent or god-forbid cringe: you can get away with it.
you stare at your therapist, whom you can make jokes with, and who laughs at your jokes, because you are so fucking good at people-pleasing. you smile at her, and she asks you how you're doing, and you automatically say i'm good, thanks, how are you? while the answer swims somewhere in your little lizard brain:
how long have you been doing this now? mastering the art of your body and mind like you're piloting a puppet. has it worked? what do you mean that all you feel is... just exhausted. pick yourself up, the tightrope has no net. after all, you're cheating, somehow, but nobody seems to know you actually flunked the test. it's working!
aren't you happy yet?
#almost wrote the champagne line as ''effervescent'' but legit could not write it without saying ''effervescent like a snail''#ah tumblr...#writeblr#warm up#idk . having trouble writing rn#ps i don't like to talk about it . it is my medical information. but before you ask. yes this is about being on the spectrum#i really don't like when ppl make my writing about how im [whatever ID]. i want it to ring true for the people who it rings true for#i don't want it to be like ''awwwww look at this person!!! she's the EXCEPTION!!! :)" .....#no.... not really.....#idk something gross happens whenever i admit to certain conditions and i turn into like inspiration p*rnography#like yes they actually let us use keyboards these days#furthermore i just... dont feel comfortable talking about this part of me. i had too bad of a childhood. adhd is one thing...#this one im like. still coming to terms with. which is like. my own journey.#idk. just please be kind. some things are more private than others. this one feels private to me.#i do not know how to help others w/this . and i do not know how to help myself. i will talk about it if im ever ready. idk if that will#actually ever happen#ty in advance i love u im kissing you we are kissing somewhere on the spectrum
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happy diluc day 🍓
#artists on tumblr#genshin impact#fanart#diluc ragnvindr#diluc#kaeya alberich#kaeya#happy birthday diluc#i don't know how to make candles but they're making candles in the last one
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woke up and someone spilled vanilla extract all over my dash, so as punishment you strange little beasties are getting all the VANILLA FACTS i know:
vanilla is the 2nd most expensive spice in the world (2nd to saffron)
which is why more than 99% of what we call "vanilla extract" is actually vanillin (vanilla's dominant flavor compound) and is not extracted from real vanilla.
luckily, even professionals struggle to tell the difference when it comes to things like baked goods. but there is a distinct difference in non-heat treated products like vanilla ice cream. real vanilla has a more complex, individualized flavor profile.
why is vanilla so expensive? because it is a ridiculously delicate & demanding crop. complete primadonna.
vanilla beans come from vanilla orchids. these crazy flowers bloom for A SINGLE DAY and have to be HAND-POLLINATED in a process that is exhausting, delicate, and requires specialist knowledge passed down over generations.
then, if you're lucky, you get vanilla beans.
which then require months of further specialized treatment.
the entire process takes about a year and can go wrong at any stage
vanilla has been cultivated for over 800 years (possibly much longer). the first known cultivators are the Totonac, an indigenous people of Mexico.
the Aztecs used it as a sweetener to balance out the bitter taste of cocoa. it was popular in a drink called xocolatl--the precursor to modern hot chocolate!
it is only pollinated by a very specific orchid bee!!!
which is why no fruit could be grown outside of Mexico until the 1800s
Edmond Albius, born into slavery, invented the pollination method we still use today--launching a global industry when he was just 12 years old.
today, the majority of the world's vanilla is grown in Madagascar
if you want real vanilla, read the labels carefully--it's harder to find than you think!
in conclusion, those tiny black specks you see in fancy vanilla ice cream? those are vanilla bean seeds! itty bitty orchid seeds!!! they are delicious and also a PRISSY BITCH!
(src)
#Vanilla Extract#i open the tumblr app and immediately my nostrils are invaded by the overwhelming stench of vanilla#also if you want real vanilla extract at a discount: check out stores like HomeGoods TJMaxx Marshalls etc#the foodstuffs section tends to have fancy nonperishables for much cheaper than upscale grocery stores#you can get things like saffron truffles fancy oils at surprising prices#still expensive but like. 50% cheaper#or just shoplift if that's your thing i won't tell you how to live your life#did i just spend an hour writing this? yes. why did i do that? i don't KNOW
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I'm sending everyone who sees this some mad gender euphoria. It should arrive within 3-5 business days. If there is an issue with the status of your gender euphoria... uhmmm yeah I'm sorry idk how to fix that but I send hugs and well wishes
🏳️⚧️🏳️⚧️🏳️⚧️🏳️⚧️🏳️⚧️🏳️⚧️🏳️⚧️🏳️⚧️🏳️⚧️🏳️⚧️🏳️⚧️🏳️⚧️🏳️⚧️🏳️⚧️🏳️⚧️🏳️⚧️🏳️⚧️🏳️⚧️🏳️⚧️🏳️⚧️🏳️⚧️🏳️⚧️🏳️⚧️🏳️⚧️🏳️⚧️🏳️⚧️🏳️⚧️🏳️⚧️🏳️⚧️🏳️⚧️🏳️⚧️🏳️⚧️🏳️⚧️🏳️⚧️🏳️⚧️🏳️⚧️🏳️⚧️🏳️⚧️🏳️⚧️🏳️⚧️🏳️⚧️🏳️⚧️🏳️⚧️🏳️⚧️🏳️⚧️🏳️⚧️🏳️⚧️🏳️⚧️🏳️⚧️🏳️⚧️🏳️⚧️🏳️⚧️🏳️⚧️🏳️⚧️🏳️⚧️🏳️⚧️🏳️⚧️🏳️⚧️🏳️⚧️🏳️⚧️🏳️⚧️🏳️⚧️🏳️⚧️🏳️⚧️🏳️⚧️🏳️⚧️🏳️⚧️🏳️⚧️🏳️⚧️🏳️⚧️🏳️⚧️🏳️⚧️
#trans#transgender#pride#self care#trans joy#transfem#trans rights#lgbtqia+#lgbt#lgbtqia#lgbtq community#i still don't know how to use tumblr#transgender love#lgbtq#genderfluid#gender identity#gender fluid#nonbinary#enby#gender euphoria#genderqueer
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the easy grip on the knife. the leg over the seat. the hand over the other seat. the sassy "come get it" move. you know the bitch is smiling behind that mask even as he said the line.
#i can't believe i'm saying this#DEADPOOL CAN GET IT#Logan I'm sobbing I understand why you lunged at him#I would too bestie#it's the sass for me folks#paint that car white as much as they painted it red my god#a deadpool thirst post? from me? more likely than you'd think#this is a branch in realities i know it#i've never had Feelings for this motherfucker until this movie#all i'm left with is anger now because WHAT DOES HE WANT FROM ME#camera crew could have just made it landscape but noooooo they had to do a medium shot of this son of a bitch#i'm sending an especially affectionate fuck you in ryan reynolds' direction#i love how you love deadpool#deadpool#wolverine#deadpool and wolverine#wade wilson#logan howlett#poolverine#deadclaws#don't get me wrong i've always adored deadpool's personality. nobody's that hilarious and not have humongous balls i mean trauma.#but i've never went 'why he kinda' until this specific shot right here#@ camera crew why the fuck did you zoom in? WHY?#for me? well it's infuriating#do it again#gif is credit to the owner#30 tags aren't enough for me to dismantle how this shot made me feel. tumblr you gotta update#damn tumblr i'm tryna feed a village here#guys just find my other post
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your stitches are good, but not the best - your hands are twitching to the beat of your heart. but they're going to be perfect soon, whether you want them to be or not.
#i hope u all can hear me scream#yeah.#i still don't know if i like how i drew him or not#but it's gonna be there anyway#barghestland#art#artists on tumblr#bg3 fanart#bg3#astarion#also yeah it's a non-vampire-yet-astarion#had to make myself sad with it#hjHFIO*WYS$E(*TGUY($EY*!!!!!!!!!!#thanks
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i got all the achievements in this cult simulator so next step is to draw some fanart??
#cult of the lamb#cotl lamb#cotl leshy#my art#digital#i don't know how to draw animals or furries or anything this was an attempt#leshy noises are my favorite he's adorable#also jfc creating posts on tumblr feels like ass these days#sketch
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watching gravity falls for the first time at the request of my little sister and i just watched a tale of two stans and CRIED
#gravity falls#gravity falls fanart#mabel pines#dipper pines#dipper and mabel#grunkle stan#stan pines#i LOVE grunkle stan sm#it's a great show!#i can feel it inscribing itself on my brain lol#art#illustration#digital art#fanart#artists on tumblr#clip studio paint#csp#bill cipher#i literally was like why is this triangle guy bothering the children?? and my sister was like uhhh he's the main villain lol#NO SPOILERS PLEASE I BEG i know the show came out like 10 yrs ago but i don't know how it ends#i viscerally remember my sister walking around going the author of the journals...my BROTHER and i was like what are you TALKING about
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pick your battles
#my art#my stuff#art#comic#original art#pride 2024#pride month#trans allegory..... or not even allegory. just trans .... ^_^#i technically cannot come out yet but i don't think the people who i need to not see this stalk my tumblr#i know they stalk everything else like my twitter and my instagram but this might be safe#so fuck it we yap. this is a comic about picking your battles#this is a comic about how for almost a year now everyone at home in singapore has been crying about my sore throat#my terrible fucked up voice. my you know. etc#i came out as not cis and using they/them pronouns in 2015 when i was 14#but no one ever used my pronouns. none of my classmates or friends even up until i left for college in 2020#from 2020 onwards every year i wrote an angry vulnreable essay about how much it hurts that they dont remember#and people would dm me apologizing on their hands and knees and commending my bravery#and then forget about it all over again. id ont mean 'they misgender me and then catch it and apologize and correct themselves'#i mean they dont even get that far#and so you might ask yourself: why have you kept them around all this time?#and i would have to explain that by pure bad luck i grew up in the most conservative close minded community#that all of my ex classmates that stayed in singapore are cishet and upper middle class and chinese singaporean#that i Am the trans person. that they were able to ignore me for a decade partially because there was no one else#so this is a comic about how there is dignity and grace in staying in the closet sometimes#about how not everyone deserves to see you at your happiest. about how some people can go fuck themselves#you know your truth and THATS THE ONLY THING THAT MATTERS!!! YEAH!!! i love you
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The tac net crash chapter is one of my favorites so far~
Ah and. Guess what. I just discovered that including this post, I made 50 pieces of fanart for Mistakes on mistakes until.. I’m so sane and normal about this story can you tell👍
#maccadam#transformers#fic fanart#momu fanart#jazz#prowl#jazzprowl#considering the speed and the amount of fanart#….yeah I can see why tumblr thought I was a bot lmao#also#I mostly read during night and then drawing from memory during day so uhhhhh the accuracy is questionable haha#mainly I feel like half of the time I don’t know how tf Jazz looks. The guy switching between his looks so often jdjfjfj#IM. SO GLAD THEY RESOLVED THEIR DRAMA EHEHBJGJ#The scene in medbay was so damn cute#oh my goddddd#the scene of the tac net crash#muah#loved it~#you know the thing is - I'm a biiiig fan of mutual feelings and actions#the scene of the kiss was absolutely great but it was a bit one sided#Jazz cared about Prowl but Prowl was far more concerned about information safety and strategy and stuff#but this?? mmmm~ Them caring for each other#Prowl using his last moments of consciousness to ask Jazz if he is mad at him#Prowl actually deeply caring of what Jazz thinks about him now when he knows Prowl killed his friends#i don't know how to explain#kisses are great but this (points) this is my favorite five star meal right here#also there is something so funny about Prowl slowly discovering fow fucked up Jazz is and just accepting it#but being so scared when Jazz discover how fucked up he is. Only for Jazz to be like “boo I knew about your fuckedupness from the start”
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Seen a lot of posts about people coming into your notifications out of nothing and liking your entire blog, but here's a shoutout to the people who do Not follow you, who appear out of nowhere, reblog One (1) post that you are Not the op of, and then you never see them again. Where did you come from girl.
#EDITED bc I think this one goes on ppls recommended pages now#HEY GUYS the question in this post is rhetorical ! i don't actually care. you can stop telling me honeys its ok#i like the mystery. i don't needta know everything#also when i say shoutout. i mean it. i love you guys i am not annoyed. you're all wonderful. keep doing you.#posts by ME#tumblr#like ... you didn't find the post thru tags because I just reblogged it#i made no addition. how did you find me#be free you majestic creatures I'm glad I got to witness you in passing#how tf tho.#did you look at my blog but only one post made the cut. amazing. i love you.
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good listener - purity - messy eater - false prophet
my little collection of bloody priests because i can't live a year without drawing one :)
#cw blood#never is too early for October yaay#firts two are from around 2022-2023 and the rest are recent#just decided to show it to yall since i lined up them together 😅#they're really random lmao#i messed up with hands on the last one but well ughhhh lets ignore it :')#once again i have no idea how to tag non fandom art daaaamn#artists on tumblr#horror art#ink art#inktober#my art#<--- i honestly don't know why i use this tag only for non fandom drawings a bit stupid but yeahhh
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Memories of the past.
#wangxian#wei wuxian#lan wangji#wei ying#lan zhan#mo dao zu shi#mdzs#the grandmaster of demonic cultivation#myart#wow wangxian how rare can you believe it?#yeah... you'll know why I drew them soon hehehe#ANYWAY I love them actually even if I don't draw them often#also tumblr is doing something with the colors and I'm not sure if it's actually what I think it is but eh#I was frantically looking for yiling laozu references while drawing this and then I look up from my computer and there's his face on my wal#I forgot I had official art in my wall of prints#can you believe I drew this last week and forgot to post it?#edit: turns out tumblr is really sensitive to wether or not an image is in rgb or cmyn
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