#i don't have the energy to explain myself on this one
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dustpages · 1 day ago
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PornMum
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I opened the front door of my flat with a loud bang. I was pissed, the shooting was called off last minute and I had travelled for two hours to reach the location.
" Hi, Mum." my little boy greeted me from his bedroom. 
It was the middle of the summer and the only thing he had been doing so far was reading and playing video games, I was aware he didn't like to socialize with his peers. I was his only parent, his father left us when he was just born.
" Honey I'll be to you in a second.” I yelled across the house walking to the kitchen to get myself something to drink. I was thirsty and sweaty, even though I had dyed my hair blonde and I was wearing just a top and skirt the heat was unbearable. 
I took some cold water from the fridge and drank it at once.  
I put the glass back in its place and headed to my son’s room, knocking softly before entering. He looked up from the screen and smiled. "How have you been?" I asked him sitting beside him.
He shrugged. "Alright, just read some manga."
"You need to go out more." I opined, trying not to sound too harsh but concerned about him being stuck at home all day long without seeing anyone else. 
He swiftly dodged my gaze and sighed deeply. " Whatever. Why are you home so early today?" he questioned. 
I sat on his bed. " My last schedule was cancelled last minute." I explained without giving him too much information.
He was just 12 years old and being told I was one of the most successful, requested and appreciated JAV actresses in Japan wasn't something I would share with him. He knew me as Mina, the kind and loving mother who always cooked delicious dinner for him. Not the one that was an adult film actress. 
"Oh, what happened then?" he asked innocently. 
I tried to explain my situation without making any reference to the industry I worked for. " The director told me they wanted to postpone it. So I came home." 
He nodded. " I see."
I glanced at him, looking him in the eyes. " Hey, do you want to eat something? I'm hungry, let’s prepare something together." I suggested with a smile. He agreed.
We went to the kitchen hand in hand, he was still short and thin for his age. But his blue eyes made up for it. We both loved cooking and baking, especially him since he enjoyed eating sweets, I did my best to make sure he had a balanced diet.
While we were cooking some of the tomato sauce for the spaghetti landed on my clothes, staining both top and skirt. 
" Dammit." he cussed. He has stirred the sauce with too much energy causing the little mess on my outfit.
" Do not worry, honey." I reassured him and got off my skirt and top right there in the kitchen. His eyes widened in surprise.
"What are you doing, mum?!" he said, sounding embarrassed.
I giggled and caressed his cheek. " Don’t be silly, this is nothing. You’ve seen my butt many times before." I teased him, bending over to clean the stains from the floor. 
My ass was on full display for him and I could feel him staring at my cheeks, so plump and round, my pussy lips covered with just my small panties. It was nothing new for him to see me almost completely nude since I rarely wore anything around the house but his reaction was strange, he looked flushed and nervous. 
“ Mum... Are you going to take your underwear off as well?" he stuttered. 
I turned around to look at him. " What?! No! Of course not." I laughed nervously. " Unless you asked for it."
He became red as the tomato sauce. " I don't know what you are talking about." he ran out of the kitchen and into the living room.
I sighed and turned off the stove. Slowly I made my way to him, who was sat the sofa fidgeting with his hands on in lap.
" What's wrong baby?" I asked him sitting next to him.
He didn't say anything for a good minute, busy in deep thought. " I do have a problem in my underwear," he affirmed not sparing a glance to me.
"  How come?" I inquired.
" They're wet." he whispered so low I barely heard it. " And it doesn't stop leaking." he continued. 
His words sent shivers down my spine, I couldn't believe it. 
" Let me see." I gently pulled him to stand and unbuttoned his trousers. His briefs were soaked through with precum. 
" This is normal honey. All boys your age leak precum now and then. Especially when they see a hot girl." I told him trying to reassure him. He blushed again.
"It never occurred before." he panicked.
"Well, maybe you liked what you saw earlier." I mused.
 " Maybe you liked your mum’s body." I added teasingly. 
" That’s ok honey, it’s normal to think your mother is sexy." I encouraged him.
He seemed to relax a bit. " But it’s not appropriate." he complained.
I stood up and cupped his face. " Nothing is wrong, honey. You’re my son, but also a boy." I comforted him, feeling somehow attracted to him.
" Now, if you excuse me I'm going to change. You can stay here or join me." I winked at him. His eyes fixed on mine for a few seconds before nodding in agreement. 
As soon as we were inside my bedroom I closed the door and locked it. Then I stripped from my bra and panties. My son looked at me wide-eyed, taking in my naked form.
" Come here." I said walking to him. I felt him tremble as our bodies touched. My hands caressed his back, slowly descending to squeeze his bum. 
"Do you like it?" I asked him. He nodded shyly.
I kissed his neck softly, moving my hands to grab his cock through his trousers. He gasped as I stroked him over his pants. " Take it out for me." I commanded him. 
He obeyed me pulling out his dick. It was bigger than expected for a boy of his age, yet far from the ones I had to deal with at work. I gave him a few strokes while kissing his neck and biting his earlobes. He moaned in pleasure. 
" Mum, my member doesn't get soft." he affirmed worriedly in between moans. 
"  It’s ok honey. I'll make it soft." I assured him. I knelt in front of him, licking the tip of his penis. His legs wobbled.
" Mum..." he moaned my name. I took him fully in my mouth sucking and bobbing my head, tasting him for the first time.
I worked shipped his dick for less than 2 minutes and he shuddered in front of me. "I- I'm feeling a warm sensation spreading all over my body." he stated worried. " What is happening?"
I chucked releasing his dick from my mount and enveloping it into my hand. " You are cumming." I explained stroking faster.
" Am I supposed to feel something like this!?" he shouted losing control over himself.
I kept stroking until he exploded all over my breasts, covering them with his load. He fell on the bed exhausted, breathing heavily. 
I wiped my chest clean using some tissues and lay next to him. " See, it’s ok baby. There is nothing to be ashamed of." I told him smiling. He nodded still catching his breath.
" Mum can you explain to me what just happened?" he questioned me shyly.
" You see,  honey, you reached orgasm. Your member released semen and it felt good." I explained to him.
His eyes widen in shock. " Does it happen to women as well?" 
I laughed at his ingenuity. " It does, you made me  so horny that I want to have sex right now." I confessed.
He blushed but said nothing. Instead, he stared at my breasts. I could tell he wanted me to. 
" You want to fuck me, don't you?" I asked bluntly, biting my lower lip.
He looked at me puzzled. " What does it even mean?" 
I chuckled. " Let me show you instead."
I climbed on top of him and started grinding against his thighs. He hardened instantly. 
I knew I should have gone easy on him. It was his first time and me being used to dealing with men more experienced and older than him was a risk for him, if I did go to ride him the same way I usually did with other cocks he would break in half. But I couldn’t help it, I craved him so much. 
I was horny to stop and he looked so cute under me, so innocent. I needed to fuck him, I needed him to fill me and stretch my insides.
I rubbed my slit against his hardness, feeling the head of his dick poking me. 
" What are you doing?" he whimpered.
" I'm riding your dick baby." I moaned. I aligned myself perfectly with his member and impaled myself on it. He let out a sharp intake of air as he felt himself inside of me. 
The feeling was satisfying, he wasn't big enough to give me any issue stretching my pussy. I started to move my hips up and down, feeling his cock hitting my cervix each time I lowered myself onto him. I was moaning loudly and panting hard.
He was enjoying it as well, he held my waist firmly with his hand. I leaned forward and kissed him, feeling his tongue dancing with mine. Our teeth clicked together as I bounced on him harder and harder.
As I was expecting his member throbbed inside of me after a few minutes. I had to play smart not to make him feel bad about his performance, even though I was enjoying it thoroughly. 
" Baby, I can't take it anymore." I lied. " Please cum."  
His eyes lit up. " Really?"
I nodded and kept bouncing on him, not letting him stop thrusting into me. " Yes, cum inside of me." I begged.
He gasped at my words and buried his face into my neck as he unloaded himself deep into my womb. His arms wrapped tightly around my back, holding me close to him.
When he finished pumping his seed into me we collapsed on the mattress, panting and sweating profusely. " Did I do a good job?" he asked me shyly. I kissed his forehead. " Perfect."
I couldn't afford to tell him I wanted to keep going all night long." You can sleep here, tonight." I informed him. 
He hugged me tightly. " Thank you mum."
I wrapped my arms around him as well, feeling how his heart was still beating fast and strong.
The next few days flew like always, I had been called for a few shootings and my baby kept staying in his room days in and days out. 
It was a tiring Friday night, I plopped on the sofa wearing a white top and a matching pair of shorts. I had worked all the afternoon filming different scenes.
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" Baby, I'm back." I called my son.
He came into the living room carrying his laptop, he was dead serious. " We need to talk." his blue eyes made me shiver more than the air conditioner. 
" Wha.." I tried to speak, but he cut me off. " Hear me out first."
It was unusual for him to be this cold with me. " I was doing some of my homework today and one of the requests was to look on Google for some information about our relatives and guess what happened as soon as I entered your name?" he was slightly losing his temperament. 
"  I don't understand." I said confused.
" All the results were about you and your career as AV Idol!!" he exclaimed. " All those fucking films you've done! And how people call you 'JAV Queen' because you are the most requested actress!" 
I stared at him shocked. " Well.."
" Well, what?" he interrupted me again. " You told me while we were fucking that you couldn't take anymore, and yet your last video that hit the charts was you begging a man with an 11 inches dick to keep fucking you and filling your tight pussy!"
My jaw dropped. " Um... I didn't want to lie to you." I stammered. I wanted to hide under the rug.
He shook his head. " Of course, you didn't!" he yelled. His little body was shaking in anger.
" Baby let me explain." I talked in a lower tone.
" Alright." he affirmed. " Explain to me the reason why you lied to me during our first time."
I sighed, hoping for the best. " Because I wanted to make you feel good about yourself." 
He glared at me. " If you cared about me you would have told me the truth." he huffed.
" Baby!" I pleaded. " You have seen in my videos how wild I am, I didn't want to break you or to scare you. And I wanted you to have a special time with your mother, no matter the circumstances."
He crossed his arms and pouted. " Is it true you love other men more than me?"
I shook my head. " Absolutely not! I love you more than anything in the world, but I enjoy sex with them."
" I'm well aware of that now, no need to remark it." he spat.
I sighed and walked in front of him. " What do you want me to do to make it up to you?"
I raised his chin defiantly. " Tell me."
He avoided my gaze. " Have you saved enough money?" he questioned. 
" More than you and I can spend in a lifetime." I replied honestly. " Why?"
He stared at me dead in the eyes. " I want you to retire, to leave that disgusting industry behind you and be just my mother, the one who is just special to me. Just my mother."
I looked at him, feeling conflicted. " Baby, money aside, how are we gonna deal with the lack of affection I crave for?" I asked him softly.
His eyes flamed. " I crave for you. I'm young and you could mould me as you please to fulfil all you need." his voice was firm.
I smirked widely. "  You do, huh?". " Yes." he nodded.
" Show me then." I challenged him. 
And he did, he proved to be more eager and greedy than any other man I had ever met. He ate me out like he was starving, making me scream and squirt in his mouth.
" Bed." I moaned, my legs were trembling from my climax. He took my hand and walked to my bedroom. 
" Baby, we are not done yet. You know, right.?" I asked him kneeling in the middle of the mattress. 
He nodded and crawled towards me. I reached down and grabbed his dick into my hand.
" I'm gonna make you ready." I stroked his length slowly and licked his head, taking him into my mouth and sucking hungrily. " You taste so sweet, baby." I praised him, feeling his precum leaking on my tongue. 
He moaned in delight and grabbed my head with his hands, pushing me down on his cock. I gagged a bit as he fucked my mouth.
After a few minutes, I pushed him away from me and lay down. " Fuck me now, baby." I urged him.
He positioned himself in between my thighs, lining up his member to my pussy and pressing it into me. He filled me, his thickness stretched my inner walls and I screamed in pain and pleasure.
" Harder, baby." I egged him on. His thrusts were slow at the beginning but became rougher as he gained confidence.
He slammed into me furiously and I let out screams of joy. He grabbed my ankles and placed them on his shoulders, pounding me relentlessly.
I felt him pulsing inside of me and squeezed my muscles around him.
" Cum, baby." I demanded.
He let out a strangled cry and released himself into my hole. I felt his hot seed coating my insides and it was glorious, so much so it triggered my orgasm and I climaxed around him. He collapsed on top of me, spent.
" That was great baby." I purred satisfied, stroking his head.
" Can we do it again?" he asked curiously.
" We will. Soon." I promised him. " You’re gonna be the king of this house from now on." 
He laughed. " Funny. Are you gonna retire for real?" he questioned. 
" I will, but there is one last shot I need to do the day after tomorrow that I cannot cancel so out of the blue." I replied. " But I want you to be on set with me, to see how everything goes." I proposed.
" Ok." he agreed. I cuddled with him and drifted away, thinking of all the dirty things I wanted to do with him. 
The day of the shoot arrived and I was nervous but excited at the same time, not only because it would be my last scene but also because my son would be present to watch it. 
We drove to the location which was a luxurious mansion, I had shot here a few times already and I knew exactly where I would find my colleagues and the crew. 
We reached the dressing room and my son followed me in, watching as I undressed and put on the costume chosen for the occasion. It was a black dress and a pair of high heels.
" It's not bad." he commented as I spun around to check how my dress fit me from behind. 
I looked at him amused. " Just not bad?" 
He looked on the floor. " You are extremely sexy." he mumbled.
I laughed. " You're such a good boy." I praised him. I leaned down and pecked his forehead, noticing as he blushed. 
I cupped his chin. " Remember, this is all for fun, and you need to remember that."
He nodded solemnly. " I promise to behave." 
" Good boy." I kissed him again.
The producer of the film came into the room to fetch me. " Hey Mina, we are all ready for you outside. This will be your last scene, do your best.
I grinned. " Of course." I waved at my son and left the dressing room. 
I stepped on set and found my partner for the shoot, the famous 11-inch dick named Jax.  He was a tall guy with broad shoulders, dark brown hair and hazel eyes. His cock was so thick that the guys on set used to compare it to a cucumber. 
" Hello, Mina." he greeted me with a smile.
I returned it. " Nice to meet you again."
" So, we will be playing as lovers cheating on their spouses and we end up having passionate sex." the producer explained.
" Sounds perfect." I approved, already knowing the script. 
" Action!" the director shouted. 
The scene began with us dancing and drinking alcohol at the party hosted in the house. It went smoothly until we reached the part where we were meant to kiss passionately and start fooling around. 
Everything changed when he slipped his hand into my dress and grabbed my breast. My eyes darted to my son standing behind the camera, he looked surprised by the sudden touch but not upset. He had an odd expression on his face, a mixture of confusion and lust. 
The scene proceeds with us groping each other. Jax pinched my nipples and slid his hand up my thigh and to my mound, caressing it through the fabric of my panties. I gasped in pleasure.
I glanced at my son again, he had a hard time hiding his boner and I felt sorry for him. " Sorry honey." I mouthed to him, hoping he could read my lips. 
He didn't seem bothered and gestured for me to continue.
We moved to the sofa and the director ordered us to remove our clothes. I obliged stripping out of my dress, leaving me bare apart from my bra and panties. Jax followed my example.
"  Let's try some foreplay, Jax can you eat her out." the director said, addressing my partner.
Jax didn't need to be told twice, he pushed me onto the sofa and settled himself in between my legs. 
His tongue was very skilled and had me writhing in pleasure within seconds, he licked my labia and my clit, sucking on my nub greedily. I moaned loudly as I felt myself nearing my release. 
My hand pushed him deeper into my folds, urging him to go on. He lapped at me eagerly, sending sparks through my body.
I looked at my son again and found him touching himself through his trousers, his face was red in embarrassment. I felt sorry for putting him in that position, but at the same time, it was arousing to see him so affected by the sight of me getting eaten out. 
Jax stopped suddenly and my gaze snapped back on him as he kneeled in front of me, holding his throbbing member. " She tastes wonderful." he complimented. 
I spread my legs further inviting him to enter me. He plunged into me, stretching me like a rag doll. I arched my back at the sudden invasion and moaned. 
" Mina, you have a tight pussy." he grunted. " I'm not even halfway in."
He began thrusting, slowly at first, allowing me to adjust to his size. Once he was fully seated in my channel he picked up his pace, pounding me fiercely.
I moaned at his ministration, my hands clawed at the cushion of the sofa.
" Oh god!" I shouted in pleasure. " Yes! Fuck me like that." I cried out as he hit my spot, rubbing it repeatedly.
My body trembled as he kept ramming me, I was at his complete mercy. My orgasm came overbearingly, causing me to convulse wildly. 
He fucked me through my climax, not stopping in the slightest. 
He was proving himself to be one of the best actors in the business. " Change position." the director ordered. 
We ended up in a reverse cowgirl. My legs were still trembling from the aftershock of my climax but I managed to sit on him, impaling myself on his cock.
I started to bounce on him, rubbing myself against his pelvis. His hands grabbed my tits from behind and kneaded them roughly. 
I was getting close again he rubbed my clit with his big fingers, making me clench around his shaft. " Yes!" I screamed, reaching another orgasm.
I collapsed on him, feeling exhausted from the intensity of my climaxes. He lifted me from his member, causing me to whine from the loss of him.
He pushed me face down on the sofa and entered me doggy style. 
His thrusts were savage and violent, he pounded me relentlessly. I loved it, the feeling of being owned by him. My body shook as he slammed into me, my tits jiggling.
His hands gripped my waist, keeping me still and preventing me from escaping his onslaught. 
" Fuck yes! Give it all to me." I screamed as he drilled into me.
"You adore my fat dick, don't you slut?" he groaned in my ear. I nodded eagerly.
Suddenly he slowed his thrusts and his member started to twitch inside of me. " Ahhh! Cum inside of me!" I shouted, squeezing him tightly.
He moaned and spurted his load into me, coating my insides with his seed. His movements were becoming slower and slower until he stopped entirely. He pulled out of me leaving me empty.
" Cut!" the director announced. 
I felt dizzy from the number of climaxes I had reached and tired from the scene. Jax helped me stand up and I thanked him. My gaze wandered searching for my son, finding him sitting far behind the camera and staring at me with an unreadable expression. 
He approached me with hesitant steps, avoiding eye contact. " So, you liked it, huh?" I teased him. 
" At first yes, while you were still making eye contact with me." he asserted. " But not at all while you two got lost fucking like animals." 
I chuckled and patted his head. " Baby, you gotta understand  that sex is not all about romance, sometimes you just wanna get lost in the act."
He avoided responding to me and walked back to the car. I pitied him, he must have been hurt by the way I acted during the shoot. 
I got cleaned and bid my farewell to all the cast, I found my baby boy playing with his phone while leaning on the car. He barely acknowledged my presence when I sat next to him. I drove back home, not daring to ask him how he felt.
" I'll order some dinner and we can watch a movie together, how does it sound?" I proposed as soon as we were in the safety of our house. 
He shrugged and kept on his phone. I decided to give him space and not bother him for the rest of the evening. 
I woke up to the sound of a knock on the door. " May I come in?" his voice was low and tender.  
I sat up and opened the door. " Of course baby, what are you doing here so late?"
He walked into my room and closed the door behind him. I could smell his cologne, a scent so fresh and enticing. " Can I sleep here tonight?" he asked shyly. 
" Of course." I welcomed him.
He hesitated not moving a centimetre. " Baby, if you want to be my partner you gotta be more confident within yourself." I began. 
" I quit as you requested, now let me show you how good I am." I added signaling him to lie with me on the bed.
He complied and snuggled next to me. I cupped his face. " Don't you want me, baby?" I whispered seductively. 
"I do." he confirmed. I kissed his lips, tasting his sweetness.
" Good. Now, let’s take off these pesky clothes." I cooed.
He stripped quickly, showing me his lean body and his hard dick. It was still impressive considering he hadn't hit puberty yet.
I removed my shirt and panties and straddled him. " Show me what you can do." I dared him.
He held my hips and guided me onto his dick, impaling me easily, I squeaked in shock. He moved his hips under me and I bounced on him, my tits swaying wildly as he pumped into me from below. 
I leaned forward and kissed his forehead, feeling the sweat droplets forming on his skin. I pressed my chest to his and kissed him passionately as he fucked me.
He reached up and played with my tits, fondling them gently. I moaned at the pleasure of it all. His finger traced circles around my nipple causing me to shudder.
He picked up speed and his thrusts became more intense, slamming into me repeatedly. I cried out in bliss from his ministrations. 
" You are gonna came me cum." I told him staring into his eyes.  
His eyes darkened. " I know, you are." he affirmed.
" Yes, baby." I moaned. I rubbed myself against him feeling his thickness fill me.
He grasped my waist and rolled us over, putting himself in control. He pinned me beneath him and fucked me savagely, his thrusts powerful and deep.
" Ahhh!" I cried out, my body shivering in ecstasy. " Make me yours." I begged.
He grunted, his expression twisted in pleasure. " Mine." he muttered. " Only mine."
His body tensed and his cock pulsed inside of me. He growled and spilt himself into me, filling my hole with his load. 
I orgasmed around him, squeezing his dick and milking him for more. 
We stayed connected for a few moments, breathing heavily, sweat dripping on our bodies.
I rolled my hips around his sensitive length. " You did good, baby." I made him moan. " But mommy demands more." 
He sighed happily but concern. " I'll do my best." he promised.
" Oh baby, I won't let you do anything less than your best and more." I rolled us once more. " You stay still and let me take care of you." 
He nodded. " Whatever you want."
I began to move my hips slowly, rotating and grinding around his semi-erect cock. His breath hitched in response. 
"You want my mouth again?" I teased. He nodded vigorously. 
I crawled down his body and took him into my mouth, sucking and licking his head and shaft.
His member grew bigger in my mouth as I pleasured it with my tongue. His hips bucked up as I sucked him, eager for more of me. 
He gasped and claimed me on him, I aligned him at my entrance and sank onto him, taking his length in one go. 
He cursed at the feeling of my inner walls gripping his hardness. His eyes roamed my body, drinking in the view of me on top of him. 
I rocked my hips, taking him deep into my core. His hands kneaded my ass as I bounced on his dick. 
I leaned down and kissed him, moaning at the feeling of his tongue in my mouth. He sucked my bottom lip and nibbled on my neck.
I moved my hips faster, increasing the pace of our coupling. His hand reached down and rubbed my clit, causing me to moan louder. 
" Yes!" I shouted as he rubbed my bud with his fingers. " You know how to make me  feel good."
His hand felt magical on my body, playing my clit. I rode him harder and harder, feeling my orgasm approaching rapidly. 
" Baby, try to hold back." I warned him, my body gave in and gushed out a torrent of liquid all over his stomach and cock.
I kept grinding on him through my climax, my muscles clenched around him.
He grunted in pain and pleasure. " Mommy!" he cried out. 
I held him still inside of me during my climax. 
I leaned in, kissing his lips eagerly. " Bravo, you didn't come yet." I praised him. " Now do all you desire to  me." 
His eyes darkened in desire. " Turn around." he demanded. I complied, crawling on my hands and knees in front of him.
" Spread your legs." he ordered. I did as told.
" What a beautiful ass you have." he complimented, slapping my cheeks lightly. 
I moaned at the sting. " Harder, baby. Spank it."
He obliged smacking me harder, reddening my skin. 
" Now, fuck it." I demanded. He didn't hesitate to plunge into me from behind, driving his cock deep inside of me.
His thrusts were brutal and relentless, he slapped my ass every time he bottomed out into me. My pussy clenched around him in pleasure.
" Ohhh!" I screamed.
His grip on my hip tightened as he fucked me wildly, his balls slapping against my thighs. His grunts were becoming more desperate and loud.
I leaned forward, bracing myself on the headboard. He bent over me and grabbed my tits, fondling and twisting them. His hot breath brushed against my ear.
" You like this?" he panted. " Being fucked by your son?"
"Yes." I breathed out. " More." I pleaded.
His fingers found my clit and rubbed it vigorously. I was close to reaching my climax again. 
" Cum with me." I ordered.
He didn't argue. " I'm going to cum!" he shouted and slammed into me one last time before he emptied himself inside of me.
I squeezed his cock as he released his seed, milking him for all his worth. He collapsed on top of me, spent. 
We remained there for a few minutes, his weight pressing down on me and his breath on my skin. His member still inside of me. 
" That was great baby." I praised him.
He rolled off me and we cuddled in bed. " Thanks." he replied.
" You deserve it." I caressed his cheek. " I love you." I admitted. 
"And I love you too, mum." he answered me. His eyes were heavy with exhaustion, his eyelids drooping shut. I watched him fall asleep, lulled by the rhythm of my heartbeat. I wrapped my arms around him and fell asleep too. 
I woke up by the tip of his fingers tracing different paths on my body, his eyes looked at me with utter devotion.  " Hi." he greeted me.
We cuddled for a bit, he got more clingy and affectionate than ever. " Baby, you gotta think to find a girlfriend sooner or later." I stated.
He frowned and squeezed my flesh in his hand. " Do not say blasphemous things." he hissed. " I won't leave you alone NEVER."
I smirked. " That's my boy." 
Flesh pressed on flesh, as we explored each other’s bodies with carnal abandon. Together we steadily built to a crescendo of ecstasy. Our faces contorted with bliss,  our breaths quickened, and our bodies tensed. We were one being, united in our mutual pleasure.
We crested the wave of rapture together. I cried out, overcome with euphoria, as he filled me with his essence. His cries mingled with mine, creating a symphony of passion.
As our bodies calmed, he collapsed on me. We shared a tender kiss, savouring the remnants of our climax. We basked in the glow of our union, our souls entwined in love.  Our embrace was eternal, a testament to the depth of our bond. We knew that nothing could ever sever the ties that bound us together.
In the silence that followed, we shared a moment of pure understanding. Our connection transcended the boundaries of familial relations, and we were one in spirit and flesh. Our love was pure, untainted by the judgement of others. We had discovered our brand of heaven, right here on earth.
Together, we embarked on a journey of endless exploration, driven by the burning fire of our desires. Every day brought new experiences, fresh adventures that fueled our passion. Our love thrived in the secrecy of our sanctuary, free from the world's prying eyes.
In our hidden paradise, we indulged in a life of hedonistic pleasures, surrendering ourselves to the whims of our hearts. We revelled in the ecstasy of our love, secure in the knowledge that we were truly, madly, deeply in love.
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rutobuka2 · 3 days ago
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I've been wanting to ask for a while but never was brave enough to. I'm not a very good artist myself but whenever I try to do a comic by the second panel; my art, mind and hand are all worn out from doing one panel.
How do you keep your panels and art style so consistent throughout the comic?
hi!! thank you for being brave to talk to me! I really enjoy discussing technique!
I think comics seem simple and easy to make, but they're a looong process.
👉First of all: start small. like, ONE page small. TWO pages, etc. just tell one joke, or one kiss, etc. it'll make the entire process less daunting. but do think of the beats of the story like...
1- character A is doing a thing 2- character B makes a comment 3- character A gets embarrassed
/ end
something simple, but you can cut up each little beat into two panels if you like, or just keep it at 3 and explain more with the dialogue.
👉for the drawing part, you should really start with a really ugly basic sketch to outline what kind of dialogue and story progression you want to make on each page.
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this is a sketch of page 11 of my Bunny Crossing comic:
as you can see, I put a lot of focus on drawing the more delicate moment where Bilbo notices Thorin remembered the comment, so I just actually drew his face in detail there. But the rest was just enough for me to know later where each character is, or if I needed to draw a background, where the dialogue should go, and such.
👉divide your work into days. if it makes you exhausted, you can take one entire day to draw the rough sketch. Then, another day for the dialogue and speech bubbles. Then, another day to actually draw the panels and the more polished sketches of each character. Then, another day for the lineart. Then, shading. etc.
👉try drawing grayscale first. Don't add colors until you're sure you'll have the energy to finish it! It'll get you used to the process, you'll iron out any errors easier.
👉consistency comes from the process itself. I try to be careful while drawing the sketches for my panels, because a good sketch can help you so much in the long run!
👉look for reference on other people's work! manga artists and western artists have loads of footage of themselves drawing online, you'll get inspired for sure!
I hope this helped a little bit! Do respect your own rhythm! 💖 also, if it doesn't help, not everyone likes to draw comics, and that's ok! It IS a very repetitive process. static illustrations are amazing too, and I envy the skill!
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astracora · 3 days ago
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Hi! Idk if u take writing/drabble requests but I'm chronically ill and have wondered how the LaDS boys would treat a chronically ill MC. Thank u for reading!
Hey! I've never taken writing requests (primarily cause I have no idea if I could do them justice or offer what people are after). As a chronically ill person myself, and as someone who writes their main mc as chronically ill, I'm a little bias, in that I personally think the boys would treat their partner with understanding, love and affection regardless of who that person is or what they're dealing with!
For basic pov overviews though! (All chronic illnesses represent differently! I'm working mostly off personal experience without being TOO specific.)
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- Zayne is probably the most initially knowledgeable about the nature of chronic illness. He'll have seen plenty of people struggling and managing their own around his job. He's also shown to research topics that are important to him. There's very little doubt in my mind that the man would pull up every medical document and every study done, working late into the night in his free time to make sure he has a specific understanding for what you'd be going through.
- He's also probably the one who pushes more to make sure things get done. Medical appointments, any medication that's required. He's harsher on things that can harm you, cause a flare-up or increase the strain on your body. He cares and he worries, and he just wants to help alleviate what he can.
- It can be frustrating and overwhelming, he's not perfect, no one can be when it comes to offering support, especially for things that have no cure. If you explain to him how it makes you feel, he walks back and tries to find alternatives. Softens his approach somewhat. He's a logical man so he'll always jump to trying to give a solution, but he cares so deeply, if you say you just need an ear. He'll be there.
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- Raffy is interesting because his reactions to his lemurian biology make my brain go 'oh he probably gets it' but instinctually. That sometimes things hurt more, sometimes days are just harder, sometimes it takes more energy and willpower to exist than expected. Thinking about his recent card especially, and the way his health dipped in and out. The way it was obvious he's weaker and gets sick without moisture or water. It's a different reasoning, but he understands to some degree.
- He's the king of creative solutions and the one most likely to focus on trying to inject joy and laughter into your life. He's also a man who doesn't care about money, canonically this boy is the 'what does it cost 10 dollars'. So whatever you might need, he's bought before you've even thought about it. (Even if he does tend to buy those really useless trend items that absolutely don't help with your condition and they're just a scam... so so many out there.) He may not have the best ways to help, but he'll never ever treat you differently. Love in his eyes, a masterpiece in his heart. Raffy will absolutely never stop wanting to paint you no matter what.
- His words can be harsh, he might say something that hurts without meaning too, a joke that doesn't land, or a tone that itches more than you'd like. Somedays you aren't bothered, somedays it hurts. He'll always give a heartfelt apology, and adjust the way he acts so it doesn't happen again. I can imagine him making a mood tracker, how are you feeling today? Move the smilie face if you know.
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- Xavier is the one who sits you down and wants to talk about it most. Not because he won't do his own research, he's happy to, but he needs to know how you feel above all else. He needs to know how to support you, especially out in the field. He's your combat and mission partner. He's also incredibly observant. He'll notice when a flare up starts. He'll notice if your mood is dropping. He'll notice when you're starting to feel like you're drowning. He's also nearby, at all times. He checks in on you constantly. Through messages or just dropping in. (He promises the food he brings is takeout and not a remnant of a burned down kitchen.)
- Do you want someone to keep you company at night so it's less lonely? Do you want him to stay around and help ease aches and pains. He and Zayne especially know good massage techniques. Xavier because fighting can destroy your body without good upkeep. He'll go out and grab things for you. He'll assist you happily. He totally didn't buy more cleaning robots so you can worry less about the stuff around your house when you can barely leave your bed.
- He's wary on the battlefield, probably initially treating you like glass. It's because he worries and he cares. He doesn't want anything to happen to you. Sometimes that bothers you though. You live with this, you have for years, and you know how to live with it. He's protective by nature, but he also trusts you to tell him when you've hit your limit. While he's always ready to step in, it has to be by absolutely necessity or your permission.
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- Sylus is a researcher too, but unlike Zayne, he has no basis to work off. As evidenced by his stories and texts, however, he will learn ANY skill in order to help the MC, or make his own life easier to control. This is no different, I think the only difference would be, his first instinct is not to go to medical documents and studies. He goes to people. Finds leading experts, no matter the cost, learns from others with conditions similar or as close to yours as he can. He wants to be able to have a proper conversation with you about your chronic illness, so feels like he has to have a good basis of understanding before he starts. He wants to be able to ask important questions, to piece together context. To sit you down and give you OPTIONS. Because sometimes it's really hard to know what you need, and sometimes someone telling you what they can offer is better to give you somewhere to start.
- He's also another 'throw money at it' kind of person, but he will buy you the kind of equipment to help that hospitals use. This man buys top range shit, that he KNOWS will have some effect on lessoning your strain or alleviating some degree of pain. Is there a tool the doctor suggested that you think could help? He bought it yesterday, he got five, he doesn't want to leave them in his other bases incase something happens but he's willing to have Luke and Kieran bring them to you wherever you are. Will set up grocery shop orders for you, doesn't care how much it is, does it make your life easier? Alright, it's done. While admittedly he leans a lot on money to help, it's the best way he knows to help.
- Probably struggles initially with his job, with the stress of his general life, his degree of injuries and how stress and strain can directly impact a chronic illness. It probably causes him to pull away a little bit. He cares a lot, and because of that he worries he'll be a hindrance more than a help. Would be the type of person to try to help from afar, forgetting how deeply important it is to have a support system that's available and physical to help. While he'll try to keep the worst away from you (I don't want to give you anymore nightmares of me), he'll listen and stop pulling away when he realises that him being there means everything. So becomes far more physically present as well, though the amount of money he wants to spend on you probably does not go down.
Fundamentally though, the boys are all people who even with their flaws, would listen and learn and attempt to be as supportive as they possibly can be. Days are hard, and life can be tough, and chronic illness is exhausting to combat. It could never make them love you any less, they're in to the long haul. They just might occasionally need a little nudge to really understand what you want from them.
Every last one would understand things like cancellations because of bad days or mood swings and low moods, would be willing to do your grocery shops, would go to doctors appointments with you, assist with physical therapy if needed, so this is less about how they'd treat you, and more the methods they go about it.
I hope that was kind of what you were after! 💖
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allthegothihopgirls · 1 year ago
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'going to georgia' by the mountain goats but it's about lee everett during twdg s1
#.#i don't have the energy to explain myself on this one#i have a lot of complex thoughts about this that i dont think i can fully articulate rn#twdg#lee everett#oh actually im going to elaborate on one part of this because i might forget#the whole 'crossing the macon county line' repeating part of the song#lee grew up in macon#and i like the emphasis in the song of not just travelling to georgia#but having to go through macon to be there#(having to get over a hurdle to get somewhere)#and to lee the first time they go to macon after the apocalypse begins. thats still his home.#but by the time he leaves and they're back on their way to their final destination#hes gotten closure. and knows that place itsnt him anymore#but yeah theres that one part in the song where it replaces the macon line#with “this is nowhere. going to georgia”. which would be him letting go of macon. and all of his past. focusing on his current self + goal#and with all the verses and everything#i like to think that clementine. whilst softening him up as person#also makes lee unbind himself from his past. most of which he stores in macon#because of not only growing up there#but also feeling the guilt of showing up there again after his conviction#because that was the only place he could still call home#and knowing every good memory he had left was tainted with that one mistake. because all he had nothing else but his home#so yeah. after the apocalypse. before he got the closure in macon#that was the one place he had unfinished business. and its what was holding him back#so being able to say#he's simply 'crossing the macon county line' in the end. not even regarding it as nowhere. regarding it for what it was.#is monumental#even more#its not acknowledging that macon is a place of negative significance for him
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inkly-heart · 8 months ago
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please don’t be sad little sprout, you are loved 🌱 🖤
🌱
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atalienart · 5 months ago
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Being yelled at by some clerk as if you're a twelve year old who didn't do her homework while you're a grown woman is a surreal experience.
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keeps-ache · 12 days ago
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having tea this lovely morning bc i got my yearly Bad Throat+Nose Time :) never fails
#just me hi#On phone cuz I don't have the energy to grab my computer rn lmaoo#Anyway I get this Every Year since I was like. hm well for as long as I can remember but we all know we can't trust that Lmfvshfh#Though usually I get it around Christmas. Like a couple weeks or Days before christmas which sucks cuz I like singing the carols at mass </#But no carols this year + I only got it last night so that's interesting I guess hfvshf#//BTW this tea feels like it has licorice in it#I can't taste it exactly but if you know what I'm talking about licorice tea gives a Feeling#In the mouth. Can't quite explain it I just know it's good lol#/it's uncomfortable to swallowwwww wauhhhh :(#Still caught myself doing carols earlier though so we're not at the stage where we borderline can't speak ehe :3#I've had 3 kinds of can't speak from this thing before and they all hurt lmfvshf 💥#I've had the Genuinely Can't Make Sounds Oh The Agony Ohhhhh#I've had the Whispering For Weeks#And I've also had that odd one that is Can't Use My Upper Pitch So I'm Stuck Speaking From The Chest Which Is Annoying lolll#Still have my normal voice rn though even though it's like eating fistfuls of woodshavings :D#/Also I have been RAPID fire sneezing. Olympic stuff you would not Believe#ma believes it's trolly just the sudden weather change which would make sense#But again this happens every year without fail so#/it's not contagious either I'm just suffering alone. Can't even take any of my siblings down with me what kind of torment is this#//ooouu my tea's cooling down :3 I can now sippy#//i have gotta do smth aby the autocorrect on this phone it's killing me Gkfvhsg#Gonna go fix that rn TOODLES
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kaesaaurelia · 1 year ago
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My mom's spent a bunch of time arguing with me about how I should be a lawyer and I keep telling her I fucking hate arguing and conflict and the fact that I'm arguing at all is being used against me. :\
Also she keeps insisting I could do it because I'm sooo smart. There's thousands of lawyers out there who are dumber than me, that isn't the issue, the issue is do I have the temperament and how much more can my mental health take.
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copia · 3 months ago
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been a sleep token fan since january; listened to ascensionism for the first time today. don't ask. point is i should be used to them and vessel's genre-defying ways by now but the switch-up at ~1:47 still made me laugh out loud
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evermoredeluxe · 1 year ago
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I think being from Central America just like other specific areas of the world gave me a thick skin when it came to anything fandom related, it sounds bad but I don't expect anything from anyone because people don't even call this part of the continent by it's name. Like yeah coming to concerts here makes zero sense if your tour is Taylor sized I get it, I'm also a debut swiftie but how is she ever gonna chose me for anything it makes no sense. I just live in peace, of course I would love to meet her but that's just not happening so I can either be disappointed or accept it.
no i 100% feel you. maybe i feel the way i do because i was originally an indian fan.
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momochiiee-reblogs · 1 year ago
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Being screamed at for things that aren't my fault seems to be a norm in this house
There's cookware scattered an dirty? Guess who gets blamed for it? The exact one that almost never has spoons for cooking in the first place
I live cleaning the trail after me so they won't have any reason to scream at me, but my brother leaves absolute messes behind him and the screams are for me
Fuck off
#momochiiee mussings#then people ask why it's almost impossible to hear me walking around#I've grown used to avoiding at all costs being noticed and leaving anything that can tell I was through there#when I get up from the table I'm always told to put their dishes in the dishwasher as I am putting mine#then the days I'm not around no one fucking cleans the table after themselves and I am still the one that gets called dirty and messy#my room is a mess YES. but the rest of the house isn't my room and therefore Isn't my living space and I must make sure I do not litter#I clean my own room when I have the spoons for it and refuse for anyone else to do it for me. it's my mess and I must deal with it myself#why do they insist I am to blame for their own mess of the kitchen when I barely have the energy to cook once a month???#and it's not like they don't entrust other chores to me#but I digress I'm just mad because I've been blamed for the mess my dad and brother did and blamed on me just because I went there#every time I happen to have the energy to cook they complain about my cooking or blame messes on me even if I handwash & put away everything#it would be nice if they spared a fucking word of appreciation every now and then#I'm not asking them to call me endearingly but at least to not spit on any tiny effort I manage to make... or blame me for their mistakes#I'm starting to see how as soon as I am rendered jobless mid December I'll start to get screamed at again more often#and get the I'm a nuisance treatment because I can't afford basic stuff anymore#it's going to be a long year for sure... but I must put my all on the intensive classes so I can score a good job#If I manage... I will finally be able to get out of here and have my own space without any more screams#and without them brushing off my sensory triggers every time I try to explain how certain things and situations get me anxious af
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purring-tiefling · 2 years ago
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not vent but vent. like. i think i would attribute anything negative to venting. anyways it's in the tags
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noxtivagus · 2 years ago
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i get distracted so easily but i promise i'll get more done ! eventually aaaa 🫶🏼
#🌙.rambles#i find it so amusing how wnvr i have a new interest i always get into it so deeply#a week ago i listened to sm architects songs n searched up sm lyrics n read articles too n now this week it's#switched to the 1975 n i'm listening to sm of their songs too n reading even more articles n watching stuff n YEAH N#oh dear. i shld be doing my assignments due like 24 hours from now n they're easy n i'm nearly done#that's the thing i'm srs nearly done but i keep on getting distracted 😭 n then other stuff too i wna do but forget hflkasdjfd#can't blame me though bcs isn't there just so much to life? n other than all these responsibilities n. survival i suppose. in this society#i just want to live n. learn everything. understand as much as i can and be understood.#be at peace w all the contradictions in life.. 'always' is never possible but i do know i'll endlessly keep on going on until my end#sorry. that doesn't really make sense i just contradicted myself 💀 theres rlly just sm n. it's weird bcs.. i've rlly known extremes so well#like w apollo i have a twin i know how it is to have. such a deep and close relationship with another person. we're like#familial soulmates fr so ik how to direct my energy so.. yk yeah so IDK HOW TO EXPLAIN BUT#maybe a better comparison is. yk when i love something i'm super passionate about it. obvious i have phases here n then but#i have. a wide range of interests but. arghhh no not quite that as well. so.. the range n that intensity? coexisting?#n it's overwhelming often bcs it's too much. n in the past trying to do more than i could rlly drained me like. sm at the same time#but then yk that time for me where i mostly just played ffxiv. uh. help i don't know how to say it n then i forgot what i was gna write#ah. it's just a lot. i really can't write it enough. such is one of the limits of being human#but.. the strong thought i have of how these stuff make more important things more meaningful is just#at the same time there's. another thought that battles it w a similar intensity. n i feel too deeply i think too much of it#but if you were to ask me how i was doing right now i'd say. perhaps stressed yes but i'm doing alright right now. actually maybe not#HELP NO I'M NOT DOING THIS ANYMORE I'M CONFUSING MYSELF W MY OWN WORDS 😭 dw tho i am fine just rather frustrated with time#i want to do so much but yk i have these priorities that i need to do.. i mean. not really 'need'. but.#ah i just love thinking of how life is in relation to society n its people n then w. i forgot how to say it.. but yk. just the universe#it's so heavy thinking about these heavy things so often. the intense desire to understand n be understood..#to learn and to be learned. or maybe these songs r making me think of how. there's just so much. in life n death n everything#there's so much i don't know n again n again i keep on saying that while there's so much i don't know in every single aspect#there's.. people that r specifically one of my greatest weaknesses w just how unpredictable we are. i love it though but at the same time#it's uh. yeah. thinking of time n the past n present n future n how it's filled with so much is something that i want to#i want to take all of it in but it's also so overwhelming n i'm just at odds with my own self rn but i'm fine#words aren't enough honestly. but i want to convey it somehow. so i'll do what is right for me. in time.
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gu6chan · 26 days ago
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Semi-hot take but I feel like whenever ppl harp on "existentialism" as a trademark of a game being "deep" and "philosophical" it's bc 90% of the time they don't know what other topics in philosophy there even are to be discussed
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fortunately-bi · 8 months ago
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...... If I went on a hiatus for who knows how long again would y'all hate me....... 👉👈
#i just spent like an hour writing and rewriting a post trying to explain myself amd its just so hard to put into words#im bored here but not in a ew not enough content for the dopamine hit shit#in like a every time i scroll through I dont smile I dont see anything that makes me happy at all i dont get a laugh or anything#its just mindless brain rotting scrolling nothing wasting my time hoping maybe ill see a new artist to follow or something#and every time its nothing#so much nothing taking up so much of my time and space in my life and i already dont have a lot of time to begin with#ive made some awesome friends here ive had lovers from here ive had people who are no longer on this earth from here who ill never forget#i dont think ive really enjoyed anything on here in 7 years#ive left before for a really long time i think like a year or more or something#and i wont be totally unreachable of people message me ill respond but im so sick of this stupid app taking up my life#and all i ever get out of it is getting mad or getting depressed over shit that really is t worth my mental state over#all i ever feel on here is that the world fuckin sucks and theres not even anything here to make hanging around worth it#im not new to this site making me suicidal for an abundance of reasons and im luckily in a spot where i wont actually hurt myself#its just ideation and intrusive thoughts but its a pattern i cant keep ignoring#also im old tumblr im old tumblr and i think i will always be old tumblr im just not catching on to new shit anymore#the fact im even saying anything about a hiatus should show how pld tumblr i am no one does this anymore lol#i just don't want to be here anymore i dont really want to be anywhere online anymore tbh#its always something and i cant mentally keep up with it anymore i have too much going on in my life#my wife is having cancer removed on Tuesday im a lead teacher who has to take care of i think 8 babies now#i have problems i have actual problems that need me and need me to be as there as i can be#i cant be spiraling over stuff online on top of real world problems im in no position to do anything about on top of personal life problems#that are drastically affecting my life at home and hurting my family and loved ones#i have a mass in my thyroid which is so big i choke to the point i stop breathing if I dont have my meds i throw up all day#i have to see a neurologist because at best i have a pinched nerve at worst im having seizures and i might have to move states again#i dont have it in me to come on here and see stuff that makes me upset for the chance i might see something i like#and i can unfollow people and whatever but I dont have the energy or time to sift through people i follow on here#if you want to talk in dms or asks or you want to send me posts pls by all means continue to do so thats fine#but i think i need to take the app out of my line of sight again for a bit and just be in the moment again same with twitter#anyways i love yall i promise i am safe and not in harms way im just stressed af and i have got to start cutting things out that#arent doing anything other then making me miserable
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appleblueberry-pie · 10 months ago
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Explaining your First Love to the Yandere's
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A/N: "The Yandere's", meaning as many yandere's i think I can characterize as yandere's as perfectly as possible without burning myself out. Also, are the pictures too much?????? Also, I couldn't find a good pic for Sugu without picking the one where he's literally going insane LMAOOO. Love how my semi-debut for my yandere characterization for him is shown w a not so pleasant picture of him(they're all perfect). Anyways, this is probably gonna be my most chaotic, yet organized, post about jjk ever. I have a solid plan and will go through with it. It's friday and this is me "letting loose" before the weekend. Also, the first love story will be pulled from my own experience. With multiple twists to it to make it sound as interesting as possible.
SCENARIO:
"Mmmm. I remember my first love." You hum in a pleasant tone as you start to reminisce events of who you first gave your heart to. "I loved him so much, it was insane. Because....we grew up with each other. We used to be like this." You twist your fingers together, smiling at him as you explain. "He was an embodiment of me, as I was of him. I don't remember a time we weren't friends. I think it helps to mention that our mom's were friends and they were neighbors. So....we've always known each other. He's a year older than me."
You two were out in the park on the grass. He suggested a little picnic together, hoping to bring you two closer so he could possibly make more moves to be more than a friend. But you were so oblivious to it, even going as far as talking of your first love as if you still missed this stupid asshole.
"I still miss him." You go silent for a few seconds and stare down at the checkered blanket, smiling. He gapes a little and resists the urge to scoff. "We both loved playing video games, we watched the same tv shows, went to the same elementary school....a lot of things happened between us. He didn't like me back, though. I confessed to him when I was 9 and he said no." You laugh. "But even then, I still loved him. I still feel it, too. For some reason, my love for others doesn't really go away. Just sits at the bottom of my heart to make more room for others."
You sigh and continue talking about the guy. "He just grew more and more....attractive as I grew up. I am pretty sure he's why I have my type that I have in men currently. He's very tall....a deep voice." You sigh, closing your eyes to remember. "Relaxed, closed off.....I heard him on the phone when our moms were talking a month ago. He sounds....so different. I don't even know what I'd do with myself if I saw him again." In real time, he watched you unravel slowly to show how.....inf*tuated you were with this guy. You were so focused on naming his qualities. As if you could picture him perfectly in your mind.
"I'm so glad we don't talk to each other anymore. I ruined our relationship. Said a few inappropriate things I shouldn't have said at the wrong time. I haven't spoken to him in....6 years. And I'd rather it stay that way, honestly. Because he's a rather boring person outside of his physical attributes. But I have attachment issues." You pick up one of the snacks laid out between the two of you. "Yeah. I'm done talking about him. I would rather not think of him anymore."
YANDERE REACTIONS:
Sukuna:
Sukuna was baffled. Anger, frustration, fear, and even jealousy kept his tongue from moving. He thought this moment wouldn't ever happen in his life. He thought this wasn't a possibility. Your extreme disloyalty to him was what made him clench his hands in anger. But if he rationally thought about this, you don't know. You don't know how much he loves you. How much the Ryomen Sukuna loves you. You were supposed to be his in all lifetimes. He felt like he absolutely knew you were pure. You smelled pure and your energy felt pure when he first met you. So why were you fixing your mouth to say such disgusting and unfaithful words to him as if he wasn't right there?
He wanted to ask you if you've been trying to give yourself to him like a whore, but he knew that was just him overreacting. He wouldn't ever say such things to you, anyways. He wanted to change for you and was trying, starting with these stupid little date settings he knew you loved. A fucking park. And here he was being stabbed in the chest multiple times without your knowledge of it. It was all your doing.
He might be human in this lifetime. He might be nothing but a mere human for you to toy with freely, and he would let you do it to him. But he would never allow a puny roach get in the way of getting what he deserves. He deserves you and he will have you, one way or another. And if that means cutting a small piece of your heart out just to keep the rest, then so be it. He can't have any piece of you in him. Just thinking about him makes another vessel pop in his body somewhere. He will kill this thing.
Kento:
Maybe he was overbearing. He really just couldn't help but feel insecure. There should be no real reason for you to bring up a man from the past. Someone that should clearly be out of your mind. Was he boring? What did that fool have that he didn't? And why did you mention it while you two were on this date??(It wasn't a date, but it felt like it to him) Maybe he was too plain. Men like him were just smokers and loners, of course you'd bring up someone else that can satiate your desire for real love. It's all because he couldn't. Not in the way you want to be loved.
But he knew, he knew that he was enough. He knew he was your type as well, so, what did you mean by he was the type you have in men?? What does that mean for him? Will you use him and throw him away? He doesn't want to be used and tossed out like trash. He wanted to be yours forever. He wanted to be your man. Your man. He wanted to be your lover, your obsesser and the one you obsess over, not that imbecile. He wanted to be skin to skin, he wanted to be under your skin, he wanted to make his mark on you and for you to do the same to him. He deserves your love. But here you are expressing it for another man you haven't even spoken to in over 6 years. He deserves that type of commitment, there's nothing he's done to deserve it this late.
"I love you." The words slip out like oil on water. And it makes his heart oh, so much lighter.
Suguru:
"Heavens. I'm glad you aren't talking with him now." Suguru chuckles and shakes his head, peeling off more strawberry leaves for you. "This is why." He points with the strawberry at the people walking past and then gives you the strawberry. "This is why I don't want you talking with them. They do this to hold you in their clutches, I've seen it." Suguru sighs as he recalls your story in his mind. Jesus, was it trying to hypnotize you? If so, it was working. No worries, it won't be around to mess with your mind much longer.
"They actively lie, they laze around, let their emotions control them, and then try to manipulate you to stay with them to be their stepping stool." He brushes your hair back neatly, and you scrunch your eyebrows at his words. "But I know you're better than him. Better than all of them." He calls out your name and stares into your eyes with a look that makes you flustered. What is his problem?
"You are the light. You are one of the most strongest and intelligent sorcerers I have seen of this time. You hold up your potential and continue to blow my mind with how beautiful your soul is. I am constantly drawn to you and your energy, I never get enough of it. I don't ever want to hinder you and I don't want anyone else to hinder your energy. That's why I will kill that filthy animal that tried to touch you." It's scary, the way he maintains eye contact with you and spits the nastiest insult about the man you once loved with your whole heart.
"I can't wait to get to know you better. You've been teaching me so much. Maybe you can tell me about your favorite nature spots and we can relax there whenever you're free. And sometime later, I could also take you to meet my family. You'll love my two daughters." He laughs lightly, knowing Nanako and Mimiko would adore finally having a real mother worth of raising them. Together, you and him would be unstoppable.
Choso:
Choso was finished with peeling the mandarin for you. You kind of were confused about how he went about doing this, though. Because all over his lap were the smallest bits of mandarin peels you've ever seen. But the mandarin looked perfect. He obviously took his time. He handed it to you softly, smiling. You accept it happily and begin peeling.
He was surprised he didn't rip the thing apart then and there. Maybe be should peel things more often. The way you so freely spoke about your love for another man when your soulmate was sitting right next to you, peeling fruit open for you was preposterous. He needed a hug. A lemonade, had to kill someone, something. But he stopped killing people for you(secretly), so he has to resort to acting like he's peeling off that devil's skin. Starting from where the shiny skin first shows. The first piece is always the hardest to pick off and it's hard to choose where to begin. But soon enough, the color underneath began to show. He slowly picked off every. Little. Piece. He heard a yelp of pain and cries of "sorry's" in his head for every piece.
Every single little piece made the air smell more and more sweet and tangy. The more you spoke, the faster he picked. The stronger the smell was. So citrus-y and delicious. It made him smile. He loved peeling this mandarin. Then picking off white strips connected to the mandarin itself, so that it was smoother and you had no access peel. Like veins, they came off one by one. He simply stared at it when he was done. Smooth, perfect. Scattered remains laying everywhere on his lap.
He's never felt this way before. What were you doing to him? What is this twisting feeling in his gut that makes him want to puke? Why can't he breathe? Why does he want to kill the kids and mothers at the playground not too far away? He needs you to calm him down.
He hates this park.
"Here you go, angel." He hands it to you, smiling. You looked a little confused at first, but then took it from him, opening it to take a slice. "Oh, this looks real nice, Cho. ......Why are you smiling like that?" He shrugs, picking up one of the strawberries you brought from your place. "Like what...?"
Toji:
Toji was silent. The awkward silence he was creating between the two of you made you nervous. He was sitting close to you, leaning over to you, his arm supporting his weight behind your back with your shoulder touching his chest. He was just staring down at the bowl of strawberries. ".....Toji?" Your soft voice made him sigh.
No, he couldn't do it. Killing you won't kill the pain and anger in his chest. This was probably the angriest he's ever been. He wanted to shout at you to apologize for how you were making him feel. But what he really wanted was to feel your lips on his and for you to shut the fuck up. For some reason, every time you open your mouth, it always ends with him degrading further and further off the side of sanity and just going completely ballistic.
You saw his hand on his hip. The hip that wasn't actually his hip, but was his gun he was resting his hand on. He would feel so much better if those shrieking rats would shut up. Fucking rodents running around you two freely like he wasn't about to ruin everyone's day.
He wouldn't say he was often traumatized, but he could've went his whole life without hearing that story. Now he has to find a random man and kill him for stealing your heart. I mean, the least the bastard could've done was reciprocate his feelings and not leave you feeling helpless. "I could treat you better than that dick." You flinch at his words before smiling, averting your gaze as well. "Oh....." He leans in closer to your face. "Where does he live, huh? Is it the prick with the glasses?" "No?" "The one you work with?" "I-I told you I haven't-" "Eh, whatever. I'll find him and kill him." He smiles at your bashfulness and grabs a few strawberries from the patch.
Sometimes he forgets you don't care much for how he says things. If the right message gets across, you usually don't mind how he says it. But he just blatantly threatened to kill him. You grab the leafless strawberries from his hands and begin eating. Nah. You were his, for sure. He sighs and lays down on the blanket, staring up at the blue sky.
Satoru:
Satoru nodded along with your words, his hands trembling. When you smiled, he did. When you sighed, he would, too. And when you finished your story, he had to swallow the thick bile in his throat. You were just....recalling old memories, that's all. Nothing else. He tried to focus on the grass blades he felt through the blanket. He tried to focus on the sounds of the kids running around squealing.
He watched you eat some of the cold grapes he brought you. They were big, and you praised him lightly for finding such a great batch. He nods quietly and stares down at his lap. Everything was fine. You were fine, and so was he. "Satoru...?" Honey dripping naturally in your voice makes his head turn automatically. The worry etched on your face made the strings holding his mind together break one by one. "Are you alright..? You're sweating."
Nothing was fine. He can't believe you just said that to him. Why would you..? Why did...? Why?.....wait, why?? Why??? Why why why why why why WHY would you do that? Why would you say that to him? He sacrificed so much for you. He killed all of the assassins that went after you when the higher ups found out about you and him getting closer. He paid off your parent's debt secretly. He paid your rent. He woke up early in the mornings to talk to you because he knows you like to wake up to see the sunset. He memorized all of your schedules when you have special weeks, special breaks, he memorized all days that you memorized, he knows what mattress you like to sleep on, he knows how you like certain foods to be seasoned, he knows your favorite weather and season, he didn't fucking learn all of this about you for nothing!! WHY don't you ever appreciate everything he's ever done for you? Why don't you notice him? Why don't you love him? He stalks you every day to understand the type of man you would want to live under your roof and be under your covers and that wasn't enough.
He's been so alone all of his fucking life. No one understood him like you do. He couldn't help but open his ribcage, breaking them off of his body to one by one to let you touch his hot beating heart with your cold fingers. He wants you inside of his heart forever and never let you go, can't you understand that? He hasn't slept in three days, predetermining what he was going to say to you during this picnic, and you tell him that?? Just fucking kill him. Kill him, kick his face, spit on him, ruin him like you're doing now. He clearly doesn't matter.
"Satoru??"
He's supposed to be the one you compare playing video games with, he is supposed to be the one you watch the same tv shows with, he was supposed to go to the same school as you!! His skin is on fire, he can't breathe, his mind hurts, the grass blades are irritating his skin and the children are making his migraine worse. Are you saying something? He can't hear you. His ears are ringing.
He wants to be him. He wants to rip open the skin and spine of the man who lived in your soul since the dawn of time and crawl into his body to experience what he experienced. He wants to do all of those things with you as kids and live with you, grow with you, let him be your infatuation. He wants to rewind time. He wants to die. He wants both of you to die and be reborn to be given a second chance he can never ever have.
"Satoru!"
Your face is twisted into heavy concern and slight fear. Satoru sat in front of you, staring at you. He hasn't moved in three entire minutes. His face was covered in bucket loads of sweat, his lips twisted into a tight smile that threatened to break into a million pieces. The corners of his lips wobbled as if he was going to cry, but his eyes were wide open and dry. His legs, arms, and back stiff as he sits in such an uncomfortable position, it had to hurt. You were scared for him.
Can he hear you? You slowly raise on of your hands to touch his cheek and he flinches under your touch, finally blinking. "Yes?" You purse your lips and bring out a cold water bottle from your basket. "Here, maybe you should drink some water." He takes the water bottle you dropped into his hand. "Thank you." He whispers and sighs, twisting open the cap. You watch him guzzle the whole thing in 5 seconds. "......maybe we should go indoors." He nods, closing the now empty water bottle. "Yeah. The sun is hurting my eyes."
No part 2's. Because I don't like continuing old plot and I love seeing people go crazy for me not continuing good content.
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