#i do think conny was a big reason don wanted to go first. hes not letting anyone else go unless he knows theyll be safe

[goldiipond]

hell on earth i was about to go to bed n then i started thinking about don seeing conny during the escape the same way emma and ray saw norman and now im insane

[kashimos-hajime]

no regrets (8/8) | r.b.

summary: For the first time, he thinks of a future he could have, and someone who loves him, and there’s something bright in his heart. Or, Reiner finally understands what peace is.

WARNINGS: MANGA SPOILERS!!! angst, mentions of violence, we get our happy ending :) pairing: reiner braun x fem!reader word count: 6.7k

a/n: welcome to the last chapter!! thank you so much for being on this journey with me. there are a few callbacks to previous chapters so see if you can catch ‘em all heheh 

masterlist

crossposted on ao3 x

Few months ago ymir asked if I could let her write one last letter to krista, and I did let her. I stood over her shoulder the whole time, watching her pen down all this sappy shit and I kept thinking about you the whole time, behind those walls. What you were doing, what you were thinking. Maybe if you thought about me. I dont know.

I’m starting to see the appeal of wrting what youre not strong enough to say to a persons face. I never thought Id find myself on the other end of this stick. for some reason, I thought that I could stop myself, resist the temptation, or maybe that I didnt feel for you as strong as I thought I did once I was away from you. I was wrong.

What do I even say? I mean shit, I can barely see, my limbs are barely in tact, and all of it—shiganshina, it haunts me, even though I cant really remember it that well. Half of it goes black and then I remember hearing your voice, I remember Bertholdt, I remember you screaming.

You couldve walked away. why didnt you walk away? It doesn’t make sens. Why did you think to cut me out? Why did you try to save me? Im trying to make it make sense inmy head. It’s not working.

Fuck I dont know what I was thinking when I asked for a paper and pen. Why am I asking you questions? Its not like ill ever understand. At this point, I think it’s pity thats letting Zeke let me waste ink on trying to write straight. He doesn’t know what im doing, but thats better this way. Better than sleeping—better than eating. I just wanna talk to you and this is as close as I can get. Its my own damn fault, but I dont care. 

I completed my mission. After this, im done. ill give up the rest of my term. I dont want any of that glory anymore. I dont want to be a hero. Im just done.

Fuck, my head hurts so much. I dont really know if what im saying is making sense. Im hoping you never read this.

im sorry. I wish I could explain it to you some day, but chances are, ill be dead soon. Whether for treason or because they need to pass on the Titan, and I wont be able to see you again. Which means youll never know how sorry I am. How much I

Thats okay. I dont think youd believe me now even if I did say anything.

I remember your dream to live by the lake with a bunch of kids. You know I started to wonder if youd mind if they were our kids, not just some orphans who needed a home. I’d imagine one of them with blond hair. Imagine them swimming in the lake.

Never told you that was my dream too. Never knew i could have a dream of my own, something only I wanted and not just something to further marleys damn agenda, til I knew you. Sounds stupid but its true.

I think youd like Marley, if we weren’t sworn enemies. Just want you here with me right now. make me sleep easier knowing you’re there when I wake up. 

Dont want secrets either. Fuck I miss you so bad. I feel s o tired all the time. 

I rember when i first saw you all could think about was how you were the most prettiest girl id ever seen. I don know if you know thats why I tried to distance myself. Knew I couldn’t get distracted from my mison. happened anyway. Wish I could tell you that. 

wish I could tell you I love you. Wish I could see the look on yur face when you try lobster for the first time. Youd love it. Not sweet, but tons of desserts here too.

Shit. And the ring on your finger. ill put a ring on your finger. I promised. i swear ill go home and buy a ring for the moment I see you again. Might not be pretty but will do the best I can.

Olnly wnat only wnat only want to see you again and beg for your forgiveness. Let you know if I had a choice, I wouldnt have done it. Would take it all back, nd stay. i wanted to stay, stay with you and the others. I used to want to spend the rest of my life in those walls, now I think im sick and tired of them dividing people who arent even that differnet.

My eyes are beginning to burn. Worse because the skin is sitll growing back. Fucking hell god I miss you. miss your smile more.

I know i dont deserve your forigvneess forgiveness. I want you to be angry with me. I deserve as much, and I cant ask you to, but 

With love,

Rienr

You fold the letter, eyes closing as your fingers trace where the ink bled, the old tear stains wrinkling the paper beyond measure. Some are older than others, and you trace over his name again, your eyes burning, your throat tight enough to suffocate.

You’re leaning against the wall as everyone disembarks. They had taken Eren off first, Hange and the others getting ready to depart for the city while Connie and Jean lift a covered stretcher too white for the vivacious girl that lays dead beneath it.

They pass you silently, and you catch sight of a certain captain approaching, his pale eyes nearly swallowed by the shadows haunting his face.

“Captain,” you say, straightening. Placing the letter back into the tin, you slide it back into your pocket as he folds a green jacket over his shoulder. You give him a nod.

“You made it out alive,” Levi observes. He stops beside you, eyes more focused on what’s ahead. No doubt he’s not looking forward to having to take Zeke to wherever he needs to go—somewhere far, far away from Eren. You cross your arms. 

“It’s good to see you, too, Levi,” you intone. Sighing, you step in beside him and look out at the Walls you can’t see in the distance, your entire body wrought with a strange fatigue that’s only sewn into muscles by adrenaline leaving the body. “I think I’m going to stay.” He tilts his head to you, eyes flickering to your face, and you mirror the shift, your arms tightening. “I can’t leave this unfinished. Not after Liberio.”

“The farm will have to be abandoned,” he points out. “The kids, too.”

“I’ll make sure I move them where someone can take care of them. Somewhere north, far away from the brothers,” you assure, although still, your heart begins to sink and you close your eyes, exhaling deeply. “I have to hope they understand.”

Levi only nods, and you open your eyes as he wordlessly takes the jacket off his arm and offers it to you. Grasping it wearily, you open your mouth to ask questions but he only sets off, back towards the cabin where Zeke is still being held, and you snap your jaws shut, looking down at the jacket.

When you unfold it, you swallow the hard rock in your throat at the blue and white slipping beween the folds of olive green before there’s a sharp whistle. Looking up, you see the carriages already beginning to load up, and you glance back at the door where the captain has disappeared through before jogging down the ramp.

You slither your arms through the sleeves and shuffle the fabric along your frame as something thumps against your thigh, and you frown, reaching down into your pocket and coming into contact with something smooth and hard.

Withdrawing, your lips part at the green bolo tie gleaming in the lights of the port and you, without another thought, pull it over your head, letting it fall against your breastbone. 

“For your services to the Survey Corps.”

There’s no time to second-guess now. No time to debate.

“Good to have you back,” Hange murmurs as you walk towards the carriage taking Mikasa, Armin, and the others back to the city. You tug the lapels of the jacket tighter around yourself and flash them a weak smile. 

The Wings of Freedom on your arm feel like a brand, and it prickles your skin as you climb in after them.

.

Distantly, he remembers flashes. 

Eren reaching forward for Zeke, the exhaustion ripping him every which way, the sound of ODM gear whizzing in his ears as he tries to make sense of the punctured sensation in his armour.

How he had softened his nape, intending to die then. At least, let his death have some meaning, he had thought. Let him make one last effort to repent for everything he did to Paradis, and to his friends who’d been more family than his own mother.

He slips in an out of consciousness for the next few days. He doesn’t know what is up, what is down, but he does recognize his surroundings blearily, the way his head spinning somehow slowing when he presses his temple to the wooden floor.

How can he almost hear your voice in the echoes of the panels, countered by someone who almost sounds like Annie before he drifts off again.

When Reiner finally regains consciousness again, he wakes to someone crouched down in front of him. Jerking up, he lets out a sound before a palm slaps over his mouth and your face is shoved against his own.

“Shut it,” you whisper fiercely. “It’s just me.”

Your name muffled by your own hand, his eyes begin to burn and you lift your palm away as he sits up and you draw back. You’re dressed in clothes that look like they’ve seen better days but you’re relatively uninjured as you pull back. New lines adorn your face—one of the many prices of their damned war—and you only look exhausted. 

Sitting up, Reiner’s whole body groans as he leans against the wall, but he can’t tear his eyes away from you. Your hands are hovering around his body like you’re scared he’ll collapse and there’s a fracture in your mask.

Something gleams on your finger and his eyes flit to it, his heart lurching when he realizes what it is.

The ring. You’re wearing it. You…

For a moment, a glimmer of their teenage selves shine through and he wants to reach for it—touch it so he can remember what it’s like to be happy. He thinks it’s an awful like now; the swelling of his heart so big he can’t breathe; the way his lungs are static in his chest; how he can’t say anything because there are so many words that want to come out first.

“You’re here. You’re alive,” he finally settles on raspily. Your eyes glint with a youthful pain as you nod.

“So are you.” 

And he doesn’t know who moves first—you or him. Nothing is forgiven as their bodies crash in an embrace that lacks grace, but they cling onto another like the world is ending and they’re the only ones left standing. 

Maybe they are.

He buries his face in your neck, and your arms are so tight around him your fingers dig into his shoulders as your body melts against his and his skeleton sags in his own body.

“I’m sorry,” he whispers against your skin, eyes fluttering shut. “I‘m sorry.” A hand against your neck and an arm around your waist, he wraps his legs around your own and traps you against him. You seem to only sink into him even more.

Is that enough? I don’t want you to hate me.

You suck in a breath, and then it comes out shuddering. “You can spend the rest of what life you have left repenting for making me fall in love with a man who was always supposed to die.”

Softly, in his mind, your voice cools the searing heat of hatred inside him. It’s enough. It has to be.

“I’m sorry,” he says again. It’s like they’re the only words he knows. He can’t remember ever meaning it this much. For him dying, for making you love him, for ever coming to Paradis. For loving you. For loving you. “I’m so sorry.”

“I know. I know.” Your face turns to press against his own. Your lips brush against his jaw and his eyes slide shut, tears rolling down his face. “I read every single one of your letters.” Drawing back, you cup his face in his hands and your fingers smear his tears all over his cheeks as his palm rests against your neck. Thumb stretching up to touch your chin, he feels sobs shuddering in his throat at seeing you again—looking at him almost like you used to. “I can’t begin to understand, but I know you are. And I know you love me.”

Choking, he gasps, “You should hate me.”

“Yeah. Yeah, I should.” You’re crying, too, voice thick, tears stubborn on your cheeks as you give him a watery smile. “I should hate Marley, too. But it’s beautiful there. The water by the sea… I want to be there with you next time. We need to go together, before you leave me alone, okay?”

Reiner doesn’t quite hear you. He hears Marley, and beautiful, and he’s never noticed how beautiful you are when you cry, but right now, it’s the simplest truth he knows. 

“Okay.”

When you tilt his chin up and kiss him softly, something inside him explodes from the gentleness that makes him want to crack in the palm of your hands. It sears him from the inside out, makes him grab onto you like you’ll disappear—this is another dream, isn’t it? 

It has to be. 

You can’t be kissing him again after four years. He doesn’t deserve it. You’re an illusion, something his mind made up to deal with the pain. He’s finally cracked for good, just like Bertholdt said he would, and he’s the devil, not you.

But then you pull away just for a moment to smile, eyes barely open as you look at him with a sad tenderness that wraps him in an invisible embrace, and he is faced with the heart-wrenching reality. 

The sky is falling, you are holding him tightly again, and they’ve lost their years. But you’re here. With him. 

He knows that this isn’t a dream as he feels the coolness of the silver band on your finger and the heaviness in how he knows he hasn’t repented a damn thing. 

Why him?

As you run your hand through his hair, you press their foreheads together.

“And I do want a family with you, by the water if you’d like,” you murmur fleetingly against his mouth and his eyes widen, cheeks burning, entire face crumbling as he turns his face in to your shoulder, crushing you in another brace. Sobbing into your neck, his fingers dig into your shoulders, wrap tight around your waist, squeeze you so close he isn’t sure where you end and he begins and your lips brush the shell of his ear. “Reiner, say it.”

“Please,” he whispers thickly into your skin, and you cradle the back of his head with a hand. He’s nothing more than shambles. “Please, don’t go.”

“I’m not letting you out of my sight again,” you promise. His breath is hot against his own face as you pull his head back and cradle his face again, thumbs brushing away the tears from his red face. “Just a bit more. A bit more and then it’ll be all over, you know?”

And he understands, then, what you want from him. Struggling for breath, for his lungs to stop seizing in his aching chest, he cups your face that turns into his palm on instinct, your face wet with your own tears as, for a moment, they try to pretend this isn’t where they really are.

Like they’re still in that afternoon in Trost, a thousand years ago, with the kids flipping coins into the water fountain and a cream bun between them. Like they’re under the tree, apple juice on your wrist and his lips on yours.

Like it’s those trips to the city, the walks on the Walls. Honey is dripping down your chin and he’s pretending he doesn’t want to kiss you, or there’s grease smeared on his forehead, and you’re reaching up to wipe it off his skin.

Like a thousand moments all at once, and he nods to himself as you brush your hand over his temple. The world outside is startlingly quiet, as if the universe itself stopped everything itself to watch this moment, and Reiner takes a breath that bruises his sternum before he’s holding your left hand where that ring still sits.

And slowly, he pulls it off, whispering as firmly as he can. He’s sure he fails—he’s shaking all over from your presence alone.

“When this is over, I’ll put that ring back on your finger. I promise.”

The smile that splits your face is dazzling. It’s the smile he’s missed since the day he left it.

“We have a lot of things to work out, Reiner Braun.”

And your fingers barely brush his jaw before you’re leaning to press a sweet kiss against his mouth. It’s sugary on his tongue, like honey and apple slices.

.

Your back is warmer when you’re pressed up against Reiner’s. The ship is quiet, and their pinkies are just barely hooked on oen another’s as you stare blankly at the empty space between Connie’s boots. You don’t speak, and Reiner’s gaze is only on you. He can’t look at anything else now that you’re back by his side again.

There’s a cut on your cheek from the fight just half an hour ago, and there’s dried blood along your hands where your knuckles had split open, but everyone seems too exhausted to clean themselves up. 

Reiner himself has a blanket pulled over his shoulders, and he sighs, slouching in his own sack of flesh.

Your head tilts towards him, enough that your temple presses against his cheek. His eyes close and he leans into your touch. Not a word passes by, but their hold on each other’s hands tightens. And Reiner thinks. 

For the first time, he thinks of a future he could have, and someone who loves him, and there’s something bright in his heart. Something that hasn’t burned since he left Marley as a child.

Reiner thinks he doesn’t want to die anymore. He doesn’t want to miss you for another moment.

.

Raising from the steam, you groan, your hands searing from the inside out as you touch your face where you swore every inch of your skin had been stretched, but nothing seems out of sorts as you glance around. Everywhere, all your friends who had turned just as you had are in various states of disoriented. The air is still hissing, crackled with surprised screams and shouts of names as people look for one another across the field. 

It smells like cooked meat and burnt hair, a none-to-pleasant mixture that turns your stomach.

Getting to your feet, you wipe at your face, trying to ignore the weird feeling underneath your nails and the ache seizing your muscles. Trying to ignore the remnants of Eren lingering like a ghost that won’t really leave you alone. You shiver, and a strange cold sweat takes over your body.

He had taken you to the sea, except it wasn’t the shore you were familiar with. There was a cabin nearby, with blonde children running, chasing after one another and a man with golden hair standing on the porch, firewood in his arms as he calls out silently. Or maybe you had been standing too far to hear.

“Eren… where are we?”

“Wherever you think you are,” he had said. “I just brought you where you wanted to be.”

A voice, quiet as a memory, catches your attention. “Here let me help.” A soft wind blows throw the mist, cooling your scorching face as you feel a presence stand behind you.

“Oh, thank you.” You look over your shoulder to see a tall boy, and your heart stops. Mouth dropping open, you stare at his foggy image, but he only smiles fully, a smile so tender it reaches every corner of you as you stumble forward, fingers stretching for him. “Bertholdt!”

His smile grows only that much more, eyes squinting a bit and a flash of teeth before he’s looking at your hand that passes through his chest. All at once, all the hope built up in your chest crumbles, and your hand snaps back, trembling just before him. He lays a hand over your own and your eyes begin to burn, tears slipping down your cheeks.

And then, softly, you barely whisper, “I miss you.”

Bertholdt’s smile merely grows, as if to say everything he couldn’t say before. As if to show he’s at peace now—that your last memory together isn’t every part of him, and your lips press together, trying to stop yourself from shaking.

 Shadows form in the fog, and together, the two look as a freckled boy and another girl steps out of the mist a distance away, beaming like the sun. Connie and Jean stagger to their feet just behind you, and your heart lurches into your throat when you recognize them.

“Marco! Sasha!”

Someone calls your name and you turn around just as arms scoop you up and you let out a surprised noise before settling into Reiner’s arms. Looking over your shoulder to look at Bertholdt, your heart only sinks.

He smiles and Reiner lets out a sharp breath beside you, settling you down. “Bertholdt…” More shapes emerge. A shorter boy accompanied by another taller one, both alike in their features. You recognize one as the Jaw Titan holder before Falco, but the other—

“Marcel!” Reiner chokes out the name, hand stretching out to the fog, but the boy merely tilts his head and waves.

Closing your eyes, hot tears streak over your cooling flesh as you fling your arms around Reiner again and press your face into his neck. He cradles the back of your head, and he feels… somehow weaker, but still, there is that impassable strength in his core that wraps around you as he watches over your shoulder, still clinging on despite your clothes hot enough to burn.

I’m alive, I’m alive, I’m alive, I’m alive. It’s the only thought in your head. Your last clear memory had truly been the others taking flight, and the pain that had ripped apart your body before sewing it back together again in unjust proportions. Your limbs had been too big, your blood racing too warmly through your head as your legs pumped but your brain screamed to stop. 

Your fingers had sank into Reiner’s legs to pull him down and you had watched—watched Jean take a bite out of him—

You shiver and Reiner’s arms tighten around you instinctively, constricting enough to let you know that his attention isn’t on you quite yet.

Boots shifting on the ground tentatively, your knees feel gummy as you draw back long enough to look at him. He still looks over your shoulder, and you follow his gaze to watch the mist retreat. Bertholdt and the other two boys fall into a pool of fog, and your lips part in a farewell, but it’s already too late.

He’s gone.

A wind sweeps through the battlefield, tickling your sweating neck and cooling your boiling blood.

“Hey,” a soft voice croaks.

Their eyes meet in tandem. He regards you softly, like you are the reason the sun rises and the stars hang at the sky. Overwhelmed, you can only cup the back of his neck and pull him into a deep kiss. Your other hand along his jaw, it takes all you can not to pull him into a bone-crushing embrace that’ll send them both to the ground.

“I’m sorry. I’m so sorry,” you whisper hushedly against his mouth, throat swelling as he lets out a soft noise of surprise as you pull him into another tight hug. You don’t care that you’re crushing him, just that his heart is pounding against your own chest. “I couldn’t stop myself. I’m so sorry.” 

His eyes widening, he wraps his hands around your wrists and pulling you back just enough to kiss your fingers that crumple against his mouth. Clasping one of his hands in both of your own, you close your eyes and he uses his free fingers to brush the tears off your cheek before reaching into some dented tin you don’t recognize.

Eyebrows furrowing, you feel the heat leave your entire body, sapping your energy too, and your eyes snap to Reiner who steps back, cracking it open and presenting it to you. 

“You’re not the one who has to be sorry. I don’t think I’m the Armoured Titan anymore,” he whispers. “I don’t know if I get the rest of my life back, but either way, I want to spend the rest of it repenting to you in any way I can, if you’ll allow me to.” A weak smile. “Truth.”

Your throat closes up, and you stare down at the ring so protected, gleaming despite the destruction around them. It looks almost out of place amongst the grime smearing your skin, the sweat drenching their skin, the smell of blood and metal clinging to their clothes, but Reiner only watches you with a tenderness you can barely meet. It’s so overtly overflowing with devotion that your heart is resting on your tongue, seizing control of everything. 

You barely nod, chewing on your lip, trying not to cry even harder as his eyebrows rise in relief and he lets out a long sigh.

He lifts the ring out of the tin, snapping it closed before sliding the band back home onto your finger and all at once, everything floods you. The exhaustion, the pain, the hunger, thirst, grief wrapping around your bones and chaining you to the ground.

It’s over.

The minute he put the ring on your finger, it would mean it was over. No more blood, no more fighting.

Just like he promised.

You barely croak out his name before you fall to your knees. You trust him to catch you, and he does.

[THREE YEARS LATER]

Just after the Rumbling had stopped, you had gone back to Paradis alone and came back with three children to a man who was still uncertain in a world that was changing. 

Since then, you’ve learned so much about the world, about yourself, about Reiner. 

How he’s seized by night terrors even now, just like you, and how one thing that soothes it is going out for a walk while the sun still simmers below the horizon, the sky a dark navy blue spliced with orange rays. The intricate details like him making a point to tie his own tie because his father never taught him how or the way he has to chug his coffee so he has enough energy to get through the day.

And some days are horrible, haunting, but now, it is far outweighed by the good. He teaches Xav how to dress smart, takes the girls out shopping. Sometimes, he’s spotted around Liberio with a flame-haired boy riding his shoulders, you trailing behind hiding a smile behind some ice-cream.

Different nations, foods, cultures surround you now—citizens of countries coming to settle down roots, spread cuisine to Marley. The idea before, of humans so different than you but still similar at the root of it all, existing, still blows your mind. The technologies that you had never seen before, languages you’d never heard, sights you’d never seen, had all swarmed you as you stepped into a new world with him.

But there is always one thing you’ll come back to.

Leaning against the railing in the port city Reiner told you was the harbour he had left twelve years ago, and returned to seven years ago, you watch the clouds travel in slow drags across the pale blue canvas hung high above your head. The water spans for as far as you can see, glimmering under the sun and gorgeous enough to take your breath away. You pull at your coat across your chest absently, ignoring the tender growl of your stomach. 

Breathing in the salty wind, you feel your chest expand at the litle fishing boats a little ways out.

Reiner was right. You don’t get sick of the sea. You never will—not of this much water. You still remember the first time you had swam in it, the salt-water making your hair crisp, the cold sweat forming on your your sun-warmed skin.

You feel a hand on your shoulder. Looking up, you spot blonde hair and warm eyes and smile. Your heart flutters a bit. You shift on your feet.

“Hey.”

“Hey.” Reiner leans down beside you, and you clasp your hands, letting the sea wind curl against your neck. Reaching to slip his hand in between yours, he sighs and you lean against his shoulder, glancing at their pile of interlaced fingers. “Are you okay?”

“Of course,” you whisper, although even still, you can feel a numbing at your fingertips. You remember what it was like to be a Titan, even now. The sensations haunt you—flashes of your own mutated body, the grotesque meat of your hands sinking into the ankles of the man beside you, the bloodcurdling roar spilling out of your throat.

Glancing at their fingers, you watch the flashes of silver of the rings play in the sunlight, your band now having a matching counterpart on his own hand. You grasp his hands tightly, bringing them up to your lips and his own grip tightens when you dust a kiss gently along his scarred knuckles.

“No,” you finally say at length. “I’m not okay. Going back to Paradis makes me nervous as hell, but we’ll manage.” He nods slowly, and you let go of his hands to wrap your arms around his neck. His own encircle your waist, pulling you flush against him and your eyes close at the familiar warmth—a warmth you’ve woken up next to most days for the past three years. 

“Have you eaten yet?” he murmurs, and your fingers play with the soft edges teasing at your pads as his nose presses against your cheek. Your eyes flutter at the soft heat emanating from his skin, and you shake your head, melting against him. With one arm still around you, he slants his body away from just enough to pull a bag out of his pocket and it crinkles as he hands it to you. Taking it, you frown and look inside.

A cream bun. You can’t help the crumbling in your expression and Reiner holds your face in his hands carefully, kissing the corner of your mouth.

“Let’s stay positive,” he whispers. “We don’t know the situation until we get there and Historia briefs us.”

“I know,” you whisper and his entire expression eases at your words. His eyes gaze at you as if you’re the sole centre of his universe, and he cups your jaw more insistently, pulling you in for a gentle kiss, one you ease into, your eyes fluttering shut as his tongue traces the seam of your mouth. Laughing, you feel his little nose scrunch and your heart bounds up into your throat as he pulls back only to kiss you again, softer this time.

“Get a room!” A sharp female voice ruins their moment and you pull back just enough to see a red-headed boy running towards them and Reiner crouches down just in time to scoop Xavier up.

“When are you getting married?” he demands. “I was promised cake when you guys got married.”

“I dunno. When you move out of the house I guess,” you tease and Xavier pouts, rubbing at the side of his nose with the heel of his palm.

“Besides, you got cake for your seventh birthday, buddy,” Reiner groans as the boy twists in his arms. “You’re getting heavy. What are you feeding him?” he adds, smiling roguishly at you and you roll your eyes as Alina and Anya approach, sun hats protecting them from the glaring sun. Alina, grocery bags in hand, waves. Anya, who’d been the one to shout, tucks her coin purse back into her bag before flashing you a great big smile.

Only fifteen and seventeen. You can barely recall what it’s like being that young anymore, but you’re grateful they didn’t spend it the way you did. They get to know beauty, and no limits at all. The former comes naturally, the latter is partially because Reiner spoils them rotten.

Alina picks a flower with velvety purple petals from a bouquet she cradles in her arm, extending it to you.

“For good luck,” she says. “And protection.” Your heart melts at her words and you pause for a moment, looking from the gorgeous bloom to Reiner, occupied with the boy in his arms making silly faces at him. Then, without another moment, you sneak the flower behind his ear and he reaches up immediately to hold it against his head, turning to you in surprise. 

“To protect the both of us,” you explain.

“Thank you. I’ll be extra careful now.” He looks at the girls, setting his free hand on Alina’s head heavily and she flushes, smiling grandly. “You three behave while we’re gone, alright?”

You nod. “Listen to Levi.” 

“And listen to your sister,” Reiner adds to Alina and Xavier. The former rolls her eyes, the latter sticks out his tongue. “I’ll miss you.”

This is their home—their family that tumbles together into a huge hug, and you can’t help but stand back, watching how they all seem to merge into one unit, unaware of where one part of their reach ends and another begins.

As Reiner pulls you into the hug, your heart soars through your body, effortlessly pounding in your throat and in your fingers and everywhere at once. Liquid heat pools everywhere as Xavier screws up his face when you kiss his cheek, the same way Reiner does after he’s eaten something sour.

And maybe it’s a bit different, or a bit broken, the shards of their bloody history still poking at their heels whenever they think you’ve forgotten them, and it’s most definitely not perfect, but you would rather have it like this then anything else.

“Hey, guys!” Breaking apart, the family look over to see Armin, Annie, and Pieck walking over. Gabi and Falco meander a little bit behind, pushing Levi in his wheelchair, and Jean and Connie are running not far behind them, shouting at one another. You stifle a laugh and Xavier shimmies out of Reiner’s hold to run towards them. The girls follow after him, trying to hold back their runs but the closer they get, you can tell the more frantic they are to say goodbye.

So this is what they’ve made a peace. Something, you hope, is good.

Annie bypasses them quickly, making her way over to you and you survey her face as Reiner squeezes your shoulder, walking over to their friends. Her blue eyes are fixed on your face, and you feel your lips curving into a smile as she shoves her hands in her pockets. Her hair is swaying in the wind, gleaming flaxen, and you remind yourself, not for the first time, that Armin and Annie’s kids, if they ever decide they want them, will be gorgeous.

Hope for the future, and all that.

She stops in front of you, tucking a strand behind her ear.

“So,” she says at length, “we’re going back to Paradis. I’m surprised you decided to come with us. You don’t owe any of us anything.”

“I know. But… you’re my best friend. You do the talking, I fly the getaway plane, right?”

“Yeah. There used to be a time when it probably would’ve been the opposite.”

You nod, and they stand in silence for a moment, watching each other. Two women who should not have been friends, but were against all odds. You don’t think you would be here today if it weren’t for Annie.

Your heart lurches and you take a step forward just as she does, her mouth open to say something. You throw your arms around her and she lets out a noise in surprise as you close your eyes. Arms coming underneath yours, her hands dig into your shoulders and you smile against soft hair as she sighs, easing into your hug.

“Finally working together on an actual assignment,” you mumble and her head tilts as her small frame shifts, a hand patting you on the back as a sign for you to back up. “Just like we always said we would.” 

Bluntly: “Just don’t do anything stupid.”

“You, too.” Pulling back, the two look at one another for another soft moment before you remember the bag in your hand and you shift the bun up in the bag, extending it towards her. “Want some?” Her eyebrows rise in faint delight, before she’s reaching over, pinching and tearing a piece off. 

You grin and do the same and you gesture for her to come stand by the rails with you, stuffing the bag into your coat pocket. Leaning against the warm metal again, you hear a seagull call. The plane you’ll be flying to Paradis floats on the water, the technicians giving it the final check before you take off.

If anything goes wrong while you help prepare and oversee accommodations for the rest of the ambassador group, you’ll remember to fire the black signal flare, but you trust Historia. You trust your friends.

You glance over at them, all laughing, and you notice that the flower has gone from Reiner to Pieck, who’s taking it out of her dark hair to tuck it into Jean’s, and his cheeks redden as he brushes it more securely behind his ear.

Annie catches your attention again, pointing out idly that they’ll have to separate soon when they finish with the plane, and you tell her to just wait a couple minutes more as Reiner catches your gaze. Setting Xav, who has somehow wormed his way back into his arms, down, he walks back over to you, and his hand trails purposefully over your back before resting at the nape of your neck, a reassuring weight on your body.

“You guys okay?”

“We’re fine,” Annie replies. “You have a clingy boyfriend,” she tells you. 

“I think it’s charming.”

She rolls her eyes. Reiner smiles, and you pat the railing beside you—silent invitation. He leans in on your other side, clasping his hands and watching the fishermen pull themselves to shore, singing a tune to each other—one familiar to all three of them and one that you wish you could get out of your head. 

“Soon may the Wellerman come…”

A faint breeze tickling at your fingertips as a sharp call for embarkment splits the harbour, you simply sigh and look over at Reiner. “I just want these last few moments to last.” His eyes meet yours, and he leans forward to press a kiss between your eyes. Annie lets out a soft noise of disgust and you bump your hip against her as Reiner pulls back.

Closing your eyes and lifting your head to the wind, you can almost imagine the one person missing standing on the other side of Annie, dark hair like spun, stained bronze and eyes like warm chocolate. He’d smile and tell them not to worry in that sincere way of his that makes you believe every word he says—as long as they were careful, they wouldn’t walk into any traps.

Your chest aches, and your lips tug into a heart-wrenching smile as you begin to sing along. Reiner slips a hand in between yours, pressing his temple against your head and you loop your other arm through Annie’s.

She rests her head on your shoulder, listening to your voice, eyes on the sailors bringing in their haul below them. Reiner hums the shanty softly, distractedly, eyes cast across the sea.

You tilt your head up to the sky, at the stars you cannot see but will join one day, and smile.

[sugar-petals]

♡ Levi Dating A Tall Girl

warnings ⚠️  some innuendo, possessiveness, jealousy, skinship

↳ NOTE. short captain ftw 

You don’t fall backwards the first time he hands you a big ass gun to practice target shooting. Finally someone who doesn’t act like a wobbly fool. Long legs. Better shooting stances. No questions asked. Levi likes that.

You can get the emergency supply tea box from the top shelf. He is jealous, this is cheesy, but still. Levi likes that.

You are hard to overlook. For pragmatic reasons since he lives in sheer chaos and needs to collect his squad from the most unholy places, Levi likes that.

But also... he has to confess he finds it fascinating to see you walk and talk. So, Levi likes that.

You can clean the ceiling. For obvious reasons: Levi likes that.

Paintjobs are easy to you. Levi likes that.

You can carry more weapons on you. Knife here, knife there, knives everywhere. Levi likes that.

Without even knowing or trying, you have a natural bold appearance. People don’t start trouble. The squad is peaceful and diligent in your presence. Him, too. He doesn’t say it, but he admits to himself that he feels protected. Levi likes that. A lot.

It might be outdated in the Survey Corps, but Levi enjoys calling you Madam. You really look like one in your Sunday outfit, just so you know. The height difference makes anyone buy into it. So, you go by „Ma’am“ wherever you go, knowing who addressed you that way first because he respects you. Levi likes that.

The advanced Trojan horse: You can smuggle him almost anywhere when you wear a dress. Levi is kinda going crazy with your legs being so up close though. My, my. What an interesting undercover mission. Levi likes that. You, too. Wink wink nudge nudge.

When cooking, you fool around planting your underboob on Levi’s head while the oven does its thing. He’s cursing a bunch of things. But he can’t deny you’re funny and he really fits in that spot, too. Levi likes that.

Your height means more to scrub in the shower. Levi does not shy away from grabbing a sponge for the ladies as we know. Only select people he will foam up personally, so, this is a knighting. If you can shave him, he can shampoo you, it’s tit for tat. A very cleanly exchange. Levi likes that.

In the comfort of your room, not in his, nor his office or elsewhere, really when nobody is watching — Levi sits on your lap. Plenty of space, so. He fits snugly right there. Levi likes that.

You look great when you ride a horse and handle horses well in general. You can get on there in two seconds without delay. Speed is key. Levi likes that.

And I mean.

What’s not to like, anyway? Levi’s captain crush on you equals your height in terms of intensity.

Technically, you, like all other people, qualify as a brat. A tall, noodly brat. But you’re nice to him and vice versa: Don’t deliberately nor accidentally get on his nerves. So the most he’ll do is grumble at you where others would get a speech. If you make a mistake with the equipment, he won’t let it slide for obvious survival-related reasons, but his tone is noticeably gentler, a crucial tinge.

The whole squad — especially the rowdy members who tease him the most ironically — spirals into envy, but doesn’t say anything lest they want Levi’s frown and explanation on how they were messing around while you worked. The guy’s proud of it and wants to deservedly hype your ethic to be honest.

So let us just note that special fondness he has and let it sink in.

Under the guise of “establishing order”, Levi has an excuse to make his schtick for you heard: Indirectly.

Levi scolds anyone calling you bigfoot or titan girl. His supposed reason: They didn’t clean well. In reality, he’s mad they pick on you but he can’t say it.

The captain is concerned that people don’t ruin your day and he’ll do something about it. That’s pretty damn astounding. Levi hardly bothers getting into other people’s mood management and personal things.

Armin thinks it’s adorable when Levi casually walks between you and Hanji, likely headed somewhere to buy conveniences because Sasha is dying to get food. Connie calls it the ‘Levi Sammich’ and laughs his ass off every. Single. Time.

Mad titan scientist she is, Hanji’s latest experiment involves a two-person battle maneuver where you have to carry Levi piggyback. He initially declines, but it looks adorable indeed, actually. You don’t really have to put efforts into holding him in place awkwardly, his legs are strong. So much about two-person maneuvers, the two of you fight well as a duo, your bodies complement each other. Best believe the same feat applies to what happens between four bedposts.

In more casual settings, he dons his usual scowl when he stands next to you, but he thinks it's sexy that you look at his shoulders from above. You can see the weight on them.

He wishes he had your shoulders. But then again, he wouldn’t want to change bodies at the end of the day, as surprising as it sounds. Levi knows he needs to be a compact little unit to do what he does.

A lot of people taunt you as a couple, but after some time of always reacting with anger right away, he becomes cooler about his self-worth. Levi realizes — man, he knows who he is.

Should you ever faint, he can catch you with ease. Levi Ackerman is the last guy to get crushed by his gf, that we all know. He’s not afraid of your body or your weight. No cowardice, no shame, no questions asked.

And as we know. He got a thing with your legs, don’t even try. Legs legs legs leggy legs, that’s all there is on Levi’s brain when you don’t wear a uniform but skirts during leisure time. He tries to block out that thought, unsuccessfully.

Titans he can go without, but you are his irreplaceable sexy goddess you know. Levi admires you.

Whenever you hit your hip or limbs at an awkwardly set-up table, Levi will position it elsewhere immediately. Low door frames he can’t do anything against, but he will tug at your sleeve twice every time you enter a room while walking behind you so you remember to stay alert. It’s... really cute how he’s tugging at you from below. I need a moment.

In the mornings, an even cuter thing happens: When his legs are too short to reach the ground while he’s sitting on an improvised barber chair of yours. You’re cutting his neck hair while he’s pouty about his tininess. You do your best to organize a smaller chair with Armin’s help later on.

But your height difference also causes some upheaval at the start or the relationship and brings up some deeper wounds.

You can easily help tie Eren’s man bun way up there and that makes Levi extra jealous. In fact, he feels like imploding to the point of creating a black hole. Even Mikasa is fine with it because it’s all on a friendly basis with no thought behind it. Like it’s just helping Eren get his hair under control for squad practice. But Levi sees red:

Out of sheer Ackerspite, he will grow out the top part of his undercut and ask you to tie up his hair, too. This guy is on fire. Like hello, he wants your hands in his hair like that as well!

He orders Mikasa to take care of Eren’s “brat mop on his head” every morning “for the sake of the cleanly survey corps dress code” without exception. Eren is totally confused, Mikasa likes the idea, and you are shocked.

Damn, this guy doesn’t play.

He wants you to stroke and tie only his sacred hair if he’s entirely honest with himself. Best time of the day for him. Levi ends up looking like your smol samurai bodyguard with his new hairstyle. You could fancy that in the long run.

And... you know he is insecure. You always know. And, if you’re honest yourself, are glad to have permission to give him such deliberate affection because he values it so much.

Levi hardly builds any romantic bonds and if he does, he easily feels left out because the truth is, he’s needier than the average person. It’s difficult if there are only few people close enough for that, since Levi needs a lot.

Eren is no viable competition, but you decide you gotta make that clear to the touch-starved little guy. Since... In reality, the man bun discussion is not about Levi being petty just because. It’s about wanting to have that connection with you. And: Your attention. Levi doesn’t look like it, but he needs it. A metric ton.

In fact, Levi is the biggest love-deprived attention whore on the entire island and that’s a hard fact.

So, what to do about it. First: Clean slate needed, because you’re a bit annoyed, too.

You sit down for dinner and talk to Levi about how you are not interested in stealing Eren from Mikasa, nor do you think Levi looks ugly or invisible compared to Eren because of the height. You want to be a helpful squad member and he has no business imposing his brat hair rules to make himself exclusive out of fear, as if you would jump Eren as soon as he doesn’t look. And that he should say when he’s envious or wants something, point-blank. You’re very willing to give him all the attention to the moon and back alright.

Levi, grumpy at himself, apologizes for wanting to control the situation instead of saying that he wishes for time with you and makes tea.

He’s feeling mighty called out but owns up to all of this having been a knee-jerk response. Guy’s hard on himself, but that’s how he adapts his behavior.

The whole truth is, he knows that Eren is a lot easier to be around while he, Levi, is a complicated guy that is arguably hard to approach in random matters, even for loved ones.

He beats himself up for that and wants to be more emotionally and physically accessible to you so you can shower your affections on him the way you want to. That’s what it really boils down to.

That means fishing for old parts of his youth he didn’t allow. Levi wants to challenge himself to be more open to receiving. He knows he keeps his appeal on lock and it’s time to change that because he sees that you enjoy such closeness. Just the way he does, but secretly.

He also says to you that you can always touch him the way you desire after work.

Levi sees how you like being hands-on and how you do it, and makes it firm that you don’t have to walk on eggshells, hold back, or ask like it’s a delicate matter.

Levi sees relationships in simple terms: Since you’re together, of course you can touch him. It’s part of the whole thing by default to him and he even assumed you took it for granted like there’s telepathy going on.

In fact, brace yourself: For the lack of a better word, it’s even his expectation that this happens. Not like an obligation but as in, that you take opportunities is a given to him, he anticipates it.

You reply that it’s good he communicates this, it’s got to be outspoken. His views on how this whole thing goes has to be out in the open. It gives you a lot more clarity on his boundaries, too.

Before another bout of jealousy unearths more taken-for-granted things, Levi realizes he has to make up his mind that he has to talk about his limits.

So, he also says he entrusts it to you to find the very right moments for skinship.

That entails kissing and pinning and sitting close to another. And sex. Which is pretty damn enjoyable with him, the real fucking deal. So steamy. My God.

And he makes it clear he does his paperwork fast and you can always ask, he’s never too busy to postpone things entirely. He’d rather die the next day after winding in the sheets than handling paper. Levi can’t sleep anyways so it gets his mind off. It’s always welcome and he tells you not to be hesitant.

Levi is the type to absolutely pick up the cues right away — and proceed to really make out against a wall really intensely — so you’re under no obligation to wave a giant red cloth in front of him like he’s a Spanish bull or whatever. He gets the hints and goes along. Not to worry.

You also ask Levi what he thinks about you initiating romantic things and he shrugs — „Do what you want.“

The brand of romance Levi is out for you can already guess anyways. Tea and more tea.

For now, that’s where you agree to “leave it at that” after he thanks you for being straightforward.

You launch your first affections before bedtime. He lets you sleep in his bed, damn right. You really have to be a priority to be able to reside there, I’m telling you. Levi rests with one eye open and in his harness, you have all the blanket for yourself to cuddle up in. That won’t stop you from peppering his face with a few very deliberately placed smooches.

Levi can’t deny he’s a sucker for getting forehead kisses. He drops his hygiene protocol just for that. Safe to say his man bun jealousy from earlier that day cools off in no time. Not to say it shatters completely when you go for the gold that is his pretty little mouth. He’s so overwhelmed emotionally, he almost cries. Levi never thought someone would do this with him.

You repeat the same thing next day, behind the barracks after sunset. Levi holds you real tight. He’s so addictive in the best way. Going by how breathless it all winds up to be, he doesn’t want the kisses to end.

What your height is handy for here? He can gaze up to the night sky when he locks lips with you. Levi, as we know, likes seeing the moon and training his neck flexibility anyways. But that’s not the purpose behind why he’s so down to kiss you so passionately, rest assured.

If he tiptoes a little, he can park his pretty face under your chin after you both ran out of air. Levi’s drug... your long neck. He thinks it smells so good.

He murmurs in response, but he actually wants to be gently cooed at and petted when he rests there. Just a little. He’s humming. Ah, so satisfying. Guess you aced the „Do what you want“ part. You’ll do this with him Lord knows for how many times.

Levi cuddles up at your chest later. Plenty of space for him, and he loves how your voice resounds from there.

Oh— by the way. Since Hanji installed one between the two apple trees outside: It’s always nice to sleep in a hammock with a tall girl. The fabric doesn’t fold him in, he can watch the stars with you off duty. You give him a reason to be content, and that’s the sweetest thing. Levi’s all in love, he’s really grateful. You go, Ma’am.

— more levi writings: sub!levi hc | levi’s happy end/tea shop hc

[yodawgiherd]

Be My Valentine

Rating: T

>>>Read on AO3<<<

Originally I had no plans on doing a Valentine's chapter, but then certain someone wrote to me on tumblr, asking for one. I just couldn’t let the person down. So, I cooked something fast up, and I certainly do hope that you all will like it.

Enjoy!

It was a morning same as any other. Mikasa woke up, and still in half-sleep turned to run her hand over the other part of the bed, finding it exactly as empty as she expected. With a sigh, she got up, doing her morning hygiene routines with a tinge of sadness under her skin. Sure, she knew that Eren was more than busy lately, but still, a little part of her expected something from him, at least today. Nothing grand mind you, the greatest gift would be if he just took a day off, and spent it with her, not at work..

To uplift her mindset, Mikasa sang a happy birthday to herself in the shower. It helped. A little bit.

In the kitchen, there was a pot of coffee and some breakfast waiting for her, alongside scribbled note from Eren, which said that he’ll probably remain in the hospital overnight, as surgeries were piling up, so Mikasa shouldn’t wait for him to come back home. Wasn’t the first time in recent weeks, and probably not the last either. Crumpling the paper in her fist, she didn’t even realize how hard she gripped it until her knuckles started bleeding white. Ah well, no reason to dwell on it.

It felt good to immerse herself in work too, forgetting about her birthday altogether, and the reaction, or well, rather lack of one, from her boyfriend. The photoshoot was exactly as taxing as she needed, taking her mind off everything she didn’t want to think about. Dot controlled the scene with his usual calmness and experienced hand, moving around models, objects and props with the sureness of someone who spent over a decade in the business. Everything went smoothly, or Mikasa thought so, which only made her more surprised when Dot called her over at the end of the scene. Did she fuck something up?

“What’s up?”, she asked as she came close, nervously adjusting the red dress she was wearing for the shoot.

“Should something be?”, he raised a bushy eyebrow at her.

“Well, you called me here so..”, Mikasa shrugged, “what did I do wrong?”

“Wrong? Nothing of course, you were amazing as usual. I just wanted to wish you happy birthday, that’s all.”, seeing her surprised face, he grinned, “You didn’t think I’d remember, did you?”

“Well, kind of, yea.. Don’t take it personally Dot, but we don’t know each other so well.”

“Oh, you’re right my girl, but,”, he puffed out his chest a bit, “I do take certain pride in knowing at least the birthdays of my favorite models. And you qualify for that category. 100% “

Mikasa was happy, of course she was, but it did put certain things in perspective. For example, the fact that the man she was working with for just a few months remembered her birthday, while her fiancé didn’t. Bittersweet.

“I got you little something. “the old man continued, pointing at the gown she was wearing, “This dress! You can keep it!”

“I can’t take that, It’s…”

But he was already shaking his head.

“It’s for you, and I won’t change my mind. It looks amazing on you anyway.”

Lacking the words to reply, Mikasa hugged him, whispering a thank you into his ear.

“You know,”, he chuckled, “If I was thirty years younger, I’d totally take this opportunity to drop my hands down below your waist my dear.”

She pinched him.

“Pervert.”

“Just saying how it is.”, taking a step back, Dot looked her up and down, nodding to himself, “But it really does look great on you. Your boyfriend is very lucky, if you don’t mind me saying.”

The answering smile that appeared on Mikasa’s lips was forced. She could look as amazing as she physically could, but if Eren was never home to see her…. then what was the point?

It was rather dark when she left the building, jumping on her bike to take her to the gym. With Eren spending the night at work, again, she really had no reason to just sit home and stare at the wall. Plus, she could buy herself a cake on the way back. Everybody loves cake. The gym was eerily dark as she pulled near, making her wonder if Levi didn’t close it down for the night, but then again, what would he be doing? With a frown, she pushed the door open, her confusion only increasing because it wasn’t locked. And then….

“Surprise!”

A loud cheerful roar from multiple throats and a full-on explosion of light, as someone switched them on, hit her right in the face, making her jump back and take a defensive stance until she realized what was happening. A surprise party. For her birthday. Despite her usual lack of emotion, Mikasa could feel her eyes getting wetter. They remembered after all. Almost everyone was there. Levi, Hange, Ymir, Krista, Armin, Sasha, Connie, even Jean and Hitch. However, a quick look around confirmed her suspicion that the one person she was looking forward the most didn’t make it. Armin must have sensed her slight disappointment, because he stepped forward, looking a bit guilty.

“I called him a few times, but he didn’t pick up. Ymir said that he has a lot of surgeries today, so he’s probably not even checking his phone.”, he looked down at his feet, “I’m sorry, I should have told him earlier. It’s my fault.”

“No, it’s not.”, Ymir stepped him, frowning, “For starters, the stupid workaholic should know himself when his girlfriend’s birthday is, no? And not picking up his phone for the whole day….”, she looked at Mikasa, shrugging, ‘Don’t take it bad, I know that he’s a great guy, but sometimes he’s just.... dumb, really. No other word to describe it.”

“It’s fine, we don’t need Eren to have fun!”, Sasha spoke up, holding up a box. “I made cake!”

The whole gym cheered to that, confirming Mikasa’s musing from earlier. Everybody really did love cake. The party was, in one word, amazing. Sasha really outdid herself, baking not only the prodigious cake but a number of other delicacies, satisfying all kinds of hunger. Drinks were also plentiful, Connie took care of that, and Mikasa didn’t forget to thank him for it. He smiled, and for the rest of the evening looked a tad bit less grumpy than usual. But before Sasha let anyone touch her food, they had to give Mikasa the presents, and she had to unbox them, with her friend right next to her, peering over her shoulder. She got some useful things, like a bottle of cleaning agent from Levi, some stupid things, like a pair of party glasses from Sasha, and even some stuff that made her question if the gifter was serious or not. The bottle of cherry scented lube from Hange made everyone look at her, but all the scientist did was shrug.

“What? It’s useful!”

After this humiliating experience, Sasha finally broke out the food, and the party really began. And yes, she surely didn’t need Eren to have fun, and promptly forgot that he wasn’t even there. Taking a break from all the talking inside, she stepped out for a minute, breathing in the cold night air. After a few seconds, the door opened again, and Jean stepped out, joining her. Rummaging through his pockets, he pulled out a box of cigarettes, offering it to her.

“Want one?”

“Thanks, but I don’t smoke.”

“Well, me neither.”, taking one, he put it in his mouth chewing, “It’s gum, I just figured it would be a good icebreaker.”

Giggling, Mikasa did take one, and for some time they just stood next to each other, trying to triumph over the other by creating a bigger bubble.

“I have a question.”, he started, watching her try and fail to make one, “I watched some of your fights on YouTube, but I couldn’t recognize the style you do. What is it?”

“It’s a mix of different stuff. Levi taught it to me, and I made some changes for it to fit me better over the years.”, Mikasa looked up at him, “I didn’t know that you were into fighting sports.”

“Yea, I don’t like to brag, but I did some Krav Maga during my younger years.”

“That’s good to know. We can spar sometime, if you want to.”

“Let me think about it.”, Jean said out loud, while being quite sure he’s never going to take her up on that offer. Their skill levels were miles apart, and he didn’t really feel like getting beaten to a pulp by his crush.

“Here,”, Jean said after Mikasa did a bubble so big, he was sure he can’t win anymore, “I got you something small too.”

Reaching into his pocket, he pulled out a tiny box, presenting it to her. When she opened it, it revealed a bracelet, and upon closer inspection Mikasa noticed that it was made by a number of interlocked metal horse heads and horseshoes.

“Just a little something to remember me by.”, he said with a half-smile.

“It’s amazing, thank you.”

It looked good on her wrist too, jingling slightly when she shook her hand.

“I tried to stalk you on social media to figure out what you would like, but you don’t have any presence there at all. There is a Facebook account which is yours, but nothing on Instagram, or snapchat. Why’s that?”

“I never really had the need to accumulate internet likes by showing my butt online.”

He grinned.

“Understandable. But some online stuff would help the gym, make it more popular. I could talk to Levi about it if you want.”

“That sounds great, but what would It cost us?”

“Eh, don’t mention it. Think about it as another birthday present.”

The hug he got, that was more than enough for a payment.

Working his jaw, Eren tried hard to focus on the lines of tiny black text in front of him, information about his next patient, the first of today. The nights at the hospital were always something he didn’t really look forward to, but it allowed him to just go back to work first thing in the morning, so he suffered in silence. Yet something was buzzing in his ears, annoying enough for him to look up, only to see that it was Ymir, talking as usual. Well, deciding that he couldn’t get any work done with her around, he put the file down, trying to focus on what she was saying.

“I was thinking like, handcuffs? Maybe a riding crop even. Hell, I don’t know what those people use, and…”

“What the fuck are you talking about?”

Ymir looked down at him, arching an eyebrow.

“Valentine’s! What else? With Krista talking about some rough stuff, I was just thinking that I might as well deliver if she wants it so…”

“Wait, wait, wait. Valentine’s day? When is it?”

“Ehm… Today? Hello?”

Slowly, surely, the facts connected in Eren’s head, making his eyes widen.

“It can’t be.”

“Check the calendar if you don’t trust me, but I assure you that it is. What, why are you so surprised?”

“It can’t be Valentine’s.”, he repeated stubbornly, frowning at his colleague.

It couldn’t be. Because if she was right that meant… that meant…

“I missed Miki’s birthday.”

Ymir shook her head in despair.

“Of course you did, I told you! We had a surprise party four days ago for her, one you were too busy to attend.”

Fuck, he wasn’t paying attention to anything Ymir said lately, doing his best to focus at work. But how could he miss such an important event? Well, the answer was rather easy to figure out. Work. Four days ago, he was here, at the hospital, overnight. Then he came home, only to collapse and fall asleep immediately. When he woke up, Mikasa was still sleeping next to him, and he didn’t feel like waking her , so he left quietly for another two-day shift right here. Dropping his head to his hands, he sighed.

“Fucking hell, I’m so stupid.”

“Yup.”

He looked up, glaring at Ymir.

“How about some emotional support?”

“Why? No one but you is forcing those ungodly hours at you. This shit you’re pulling isn’t going to end well.”

Thanks for nothing Ymir. Hell, now he wanted nothing more than to go and apologize to Mikasa, and spend at least the evening with her, but he was already prepared for the surgery. Damn it.

“I’ll go and tell Erwin I need to leave after this one.”, he declared, standing up.

It made Ymir smirk.

“I’m sure that he’s going to be soooo surprised.”, the irony was thick in her reply.

Eren ignored her.

Mikasa was greatly surprised when he appeared home, in a good way, returning Eren’s kiss with a burning passion, holding him close even when they separated.

“Look,”, he murmured, “I just want to say that I’m sorry for missing your birthday, I really am. I promise I’ll make it up to you.”

“It’s okay,”, she whispered, reaching up and running her hand down his cheek. It jingled. Curious as to see why, Eren caught her palm, pulling it closer to his face. Mikasa had a new bracelet, he noticed, pretty thing of connected metal parts, which upon closer inspection showed to be horse heads and shoes.

“What’s this?”

“A gift from Jean.”, she jingled it again, smiling, “It’s pretty isn’t it?”

Maybe it was the tiredness. Maybe the long working hours without seeing her made him paranoid. Maybe he was just having a bad day. But instead of agreeing, he felt a wave of jealousy hit him, right in the face.

“So, Jean’s giving you gifts now.”, he said, the words carrying even more acid than he intended. Mikasa pulled back, confused expression on her face.

“Well, it was my birthday…”

He interrupted her.

“You do realize that only thing that guy want is to get inside your pants, don’t you?”

“Eren! What the fuck?!”, she looked downright angry now, glaring at him, “I had a birthday, so my friends threw a party for me, one you were too busy to attend I might add. And yes, I got some gifts there, as it usually goes.”

“Wow, I’m so sorry for working!”, he was shouting now, the irrational feelings in his chest swelling, as he gestured around himself, “This doesn’t come from nothing, you know?”

“You’re going to pull that card? Really?”

“I just…”

Looking at her, at the tight line of her lips, at the way her eyebrows were furrowed, her beautiful face so twisted in rage, Eren had a sudden burst of clarity. He was really acting like an asshole. Taking a step back, he shook his head, sighing.

“I need to take a breather. Outside.”

Hearing the door open and close again, Mikasa sat on the couch, putting her head in her hands. So far, this was one hell of a Valentine’s day.

Eren came back about two hours later, finding her still on the couch, idly scratching the tattoo on her wrist. She jumped up when he appeared, opening her mouth, but he held up a hand to silence her.

“First of all, I want to say sorry. For everything. The missed birthday, me lashing out at you for no reason… I’m a dick. Next, I want you to know…”, he scratched the back of his neck, looking away, a bit embarrassed. He was not good at this. “that I love you, and appreciate you, and even with us being together for a very long time.”, manning up, he looked her right in the eyes, a certain intensity in his glare, “I never take you for granted. Every day I wake up next to you is a blessing.”

Mikasa didn’t know how to answer that. So, she kissed him, pouring all her feelings and words into the frantic movements of her lips instead, clutching to Eren’s neck like a lifeline. To her surprise, he pulled back first, pulling a small package out of somewhere in his coat, offering it to her. Sitting on the sofa with the thing in her lap, she slowly opened it, spilling red fabric all over her thighs. It was a scarf, a rather luxurious one, feeling like silk underneath her fingers.

“I really had no idea what to get you.”, Eren declared, taking it from her and wrapping it around her neck, same as all those years ago, “But then I remembered that you still wore my old one, so….”, finishing with his work, he let his hands drop, smiling. “Happy birthday.”

“It’s beautiful,”, Mikasa whispered, feeling the fabric again. It was amazing to touch. “And the only thing I want is you being home more.”, their eyes met, “I miss you.”

“I know. I’ll have to finish this week and the next, but I want to talk to Erwin after, get some time off. I think that I deserve it. He has to cave in, I missed the party because of work.”

“The party was okay, but Sasha made me an amazing cake. Sucks that you missed that one.”, her mouth watered just at the memory, “Delicious.”

But Eren looked far from crestfallen. Standing up, he made a quick visit to the kitchen, returning with a can of whipped cream and a grin, that suggested he had something planned already. Tugging the edge of Mikasa’s shirt over her head, she followed his instruction, quite confused, and before she realized it she was naked, lying beneath him on the couch.

“See, I don’t really mind that,”, a hiss later, something very cold covered her left nipple, making her gasp, “because I got my favorite cake right here anyway.”, another hiss, and this time it was her right that took the hit. “Sasha can’t compare to this.”

“Mikasa did want to say something, comment on his choice of food, but Eren was quite hungry tonight, so dipping his head, he got to work on his treat. And her mind went blank. A lot of “dessert” eating later, and a clean up after, as her whole body was rather sticky from the cream, when they were snuggling together, with Mikasa leeching Eren’s warmth as usual, watching a movie, she couldn’t help but smile. All in all, it was a pretty great Valentine’s day. With countless more to come.

[dave-northern]

Marikina Horror Story

It’s going to be Halloween very soon, and variety shows on TV are already looking for horror stories. I thought that I’d chime in with one of mine.

It was late September about two years ago. Me and my friends were going home from an afternoon of drinking in  Marikina Riverpark. It’s this plot of land that goes from Montalban, San Mateo, all the way across Marikina from one side to the other.

There was a place near Riverpark that Typhoon Ondoy destroyed. It’s called Tumana, and it has the lowest standard of living among all the places in Marikina. Many houses there were made from wood and light materials so almost nothing was left standing after the typhoon. It also suffered the greatest casualties.

There was a shortcut from the Riverpark to the main highway connecting to the town proper, and that was Tumana. Walking through there gave us an eerie vibe, not just because of its history with the typhoon but because of its high crime rate. Drinkers and topless tambays of all stripes were outside that night. It was that kind of holiday.

There was a part of Tumana where the street lights tapered off into nothing. It’s a place where the homes weren’t reconstructed and it was just left a wasteland. It was the shortest way to the main road. 

There were one or two strays passing through, but even as we passed them they paid us no mind. They had this empty look on their face like they were hollowed inside. Their faces were half-down, like they were mulling over something troubling.

A minute or two of walking and we already felt like we were walking down a provincial road. The street lights faded farther and farther behind until we can only see a twinkling of them. The people became fewer and fewer until we found ourselves alone. We passed through a forest-like part of the town, with trees that have branches hanging down like people, right in front of the road where cars would hit them if only they passed by. There were things that we thought were people until we hit them with the flashlight on our phones and realized we were just scaring ourselves.

But there was something that happened, and up until today I can not forget it. 

After about ten minutes of walking without street lights, my friend Jeff stopped and said he’s seeing something in front of us. Off into the distance, about 40 meters or so, there was a man. Or at least it looked like a man. He stood there perfectly still, staring blankly upward.

I thought, what the hell, this would make a perfect opening to an anime about vampires. Teens getting infected and all, trying to hide it from their school and their parents. It’s going to sell in Japan! I was making myself laugh out of this oddity. At least I thought so.

We paused a little bit and tried to compose ourselves. It’s probably just another object that our brains are interpreting as a man. That’s what happens when you put yourself in scary situations, your brain convinces you that what you think is happening is real. It’s a defense mechanism and a damn good one.

I convinced them all to wander closer, and if it was indeed a lunatic, then we could just scram. We walked closer, and closer, and closer--and as if in a blink of an eye, we saw its head rapidly turn toward us. 

I almost had a heart attack. Its body didn’t move. It was like one quick inhuman motion. Its arms were raised upward, like running from a disaster, and I can’t help the feeling of dread and hopelessness to fall upon my being.

All of a sudden, I wondered “What are we doing here?” I wanted to be at home with my kids. Then I stopped myself, because I knew I didn’t have kids. I wondered how I could think that.

We walked closer, and closer, and closer. Our hairs raising every minute we get nearer, until finally, we can light it up with our flashlights. One glance, and we already knew what it was.

It was a mud pile that didn’t even resemble a man up close (though it sure did from a distance.) It was three piles, actually. A big one in the front that formed the torso and head, one at the back that formed the arms, and one further back that formed the legs and the mouth.

You see, it seemed like half the mouth was disconnected from top half. From afar, it almost looked like it was screaming with its mouth agape.

We gave ourselves a laugh and made some coarse jokes about who’s a pussy, who’s a BIGGER pussy and who’s the MAIN-BITCH pussy of that mudman among us. But then we pressed on walking.

We were walking farther down the road and we saw the clouds parting. The moon lit up a part of the stretch we were walking on. We thought, thank goodness. At least some of the creepiness can rub off this town. We really couldn’t take anymore.

A few more minutes of this and we just fell silent. We just wanted to get out of this road and into my place, where there was coffee and pancit canton and unlimited horror movies. My place was like a safehouse for strays that don’t have anything to do on holidays.

I kept thinking why I thought I had a family. I can picture the faces of my kids, they were so clear. It was as if I could go home and find them waiting. But the home I had imagined was different. It was a shanty, wooden, tarpaulin on the windows hitting against the rain... when suddenly, I was woken up by these forceful pushes from Connie, one of the people I was with.

She had this pale, stone-faced demeanor. She was trying to say something.

“Dave, wait. Dave--look, wait--”

I tried to make sense of it.

“Look at what? What are you saying?”

“The man--BEHIND!”

Immediately, my head swung behind her, and I can see what looked like the mudman only significantly CLOSER. It was like 10 steps from where she was. 

For the amount of time we walked, it should have been long out of sight. I felt this sinking feeling in my chest. I felt like there was impending doom.

Connie was nearly in tears and I consoled her. The rest of the group stopped and looked at the brown effigy with barefaced disbelief. How could it have gotten here without us seeing it? We couldn’t have passed another mud pile or we would know. There was something Connie said that struck a chord with me.

“I have to go home to my kids.”

We thought she referred to her cousins that she was taking care of at the time.

We walked a little further on and made a deal that one of us must keep eyes on the mudman at all times. First it was Connie, then Jeff, then Sai, then me. I took the first shift because Connie was still shaken up. It still looked like mud and stone, in a configuration that made our brains trip up. It got farther and farther until it was Jeff’s turn, and then Sai, and then Connie.

A little further down the road, it was Sai’s turn again, and slowly, she started screaming.

“Hey, hey, HEY, look at it--LOOK AT IT!”

In the distance, we saw the mudman, and I’ll never forget it.

Out of the shadow the cloud, we saw it emerge, and it was running toward us. We heard its footsteps colliding with the dirt road. And I remember this horrific shriek coming toward us in the distance. It was like a man unhinged, like he was burning.

I also remember smelling something foul during that time. Like a pig getting burned alive. I looked around and there was that feeling again. Impending doom. Like I’m about to die.

Jeff started to run and so did we. We ran so frantically toward the main road that we began dropping things.

When we reached the main road, people were looking at us funny, like they didn’t want to talk to us for some reason. I came to a table in front of a sari-sari store where there were people drinking and I said,

“Hinahabol kami! Merong baliw don!”

But they just looked at us suspiciously, and said,

“Balot kayo ng putik.”

And they were right. I had mud all over my shoes and pants. How did I get it? The road was dirt but it wasn’t wet!

Then the tambays told us,

“Wag kayong dadaan d’yan pag dis-oras ng gabi. Nananaginip ang mga patay.”

I asked them, what does that mean?

They said,

“Akala ng mga patay buhay pa sila, kaya sinusubukan nilang umuwi sa mga mahal nila.”

I said,

“Bakit nila kami gustong habulin?”

They said,

“Nakakalimot na sila. Kumakapit lang sila sa lahat ng buhay para makaraos. Sa ngayon d’yan muna sila sa kalsadang ‘yan, pero kinabukasan, lalo na para  sa mga kinukuha na ng ibaba, alam nilang wala nang oras.

Naghahanap lang sila ng kasama.”

And that was it. Me and Jeff spoke about that night in our school but no one seemed to believe us. Just a short while later, we were convinced that it didn’t happen and chalked it up to our imagination.

But some nights, I still hear the laughter of children in my dreams and then I smell the stench of mud. A lot of Marikenos have traumatic dreams about what happened in Ondoy but most of us just keep it in the past.

Jeff once told me that he woke up to a bump downstairs when we were in fourth year, and it smelled like there was something burning in the room. Strangely, he found traces of dried earth outside his windowsill the next morning. It was like someone had stepped there with a shoe.

[stevenuniversallyreviews]

Episode 56: Love Letters

“Three’s a crowd.”

So, it turns out time passes in Beach City! Its residents aren’t in a Springfield Limbo where seasons change but ages stay the same, and this opens a whole new realm of possibilities to expand the ongoing narrative of Steven growing up by having him actually grow up. We really shouldn’t take this for granted, considering how easy it is for a cartoon to freeze characters (especially child characters) in time, and honestly my biggest initial takeaway from Love Letters is that it’s the first episode that deals with how the passage of time by itself, rather than a series of events like Steven’s adventures, affects the show and its characters. This is a show where Steven, Lars, and Sadie disappeared for a week and nobody seemed to notice, so yeah, it matters.

The reason time alone is a factor is because we focus on the all-but-forgotten Jamie the Mailman. After a cameo in Mirror Gem/Ocean Gem, Jamie disappears without a trace for thirty episodes. This isn’t remarkable for a side character, especially one whose only other appearance is the first scene of the third episode. Jamie may be sweet and funny in Cheeseburger Backpack, but on a show full of sweet and funny characters he was easily lost in the background.

Well, it turns out his absence for the latter half of Season 1 has an in-universe explanation, one that allows the show to hang a quick lampshade on the common trope of vanishing characters while reintroducing him to those of us that forgot he existed: Jamie was literally gone, looking for his big break in the bright lights and busy streets of the Sunflower State, the big KS itself, home of Dorothy Gale and the Rockin’ Chalkin’ Jayhawks, that’s right, Kansas.

I’m really glad he’s back! Jamie is similar to Ronaldo in his role as a background character and occasional lead whose cluelessness is played for laughs and occasional drama. Both are passionate about self-expression (Jamie through acting, Ronaldo through blogging and the occasional documentary) and show some skill at it, but think themselves masters. However, where Ronaldo fluctuates between funny and grating at the drop of a fedora, Jamie is a consistent force for entertainment; he never reaches the comedic highs of Ronaldo’s A-game, but we never suffer any lows.

The secret, I think, is that Jamie’s core kindness evokes empathy instead of annoyance when he goes off the rails. His silliness doesn’t hurt anyone, and in an episode where he could’ve turned bitter and nasty over romantic rejection, he handles it surprisingly well considering his maturity level in other regards. This reaction may be a thematic necessity to teach Steven and Connie and the audience a generic “honesty is good” lesson, but it sets the tone for Jamie’s fascinating ability to be self-important without being a jerk.

Jamie’s overacting always benefits from Eugene Cordero’s veteran comedy chops, but is amped up even further by Lamar Abrams and Hellen Jo’s delightful brand of hypersilliness (see: Steven and Garnet’s workout in Future Vision, Amethyst’s burial service in Watermelon Steven, all of Rising Tides, Crashing Skies). Jamie’s love letter is zany enough, but actually seeing him write it does wonders to enhance what could have been a simple letter-reading sequence. Even if Jamie didn’t literally write the letter this way, it’s a nice peek into his ridiculous self-image, complete with anime twinkles.

Steven and Connie are classic theatrical meddlers in a classic farce, where love letters gone awry and easily avoidable misunderstandings create melodramatic tension. It’s a nifty twist that they aren’t playing matchmakers despite their resemblance to middlemen like Don Pedro or Dolly Levi, but just want to spare Jamie’s feelings. And I love that Steven, a hero with a weakness for schmaltz, rejects the idea of Jamie and Garnet as a couple even before Garnet does, solidifying that neither the show nor our well-meaning but misguided kids are going in that direction.

(Love Letters also don’t drag out secret of who wrote “Garnet’s” response letter, which further subverts typical farce tropes but probably has more to do with the eleven minute runtime.)

As Jamie says, Steven and Connie are super cute. It’s nice to have them as supporting characters (albeit the characters with the most screen time); we get snippets of them just hanging out in most of their episodes, but this time it doesn’t contrast with more serious drama like Connie’s replacement by a doppelganger or the possible end of their friendship. This is the first full episode of the two kids just being kids since Winter Forecast (oh look, another Jo/Abrams episode), and it’s soon to be followed by Connie’s temporary indoctrination; heavy episodes like Full Disclosure and Sworn to the Sword may be great, but a respite is appreciated.

Fortunately, a calmer (if wackier) tone doesn’t mean Love Letters lacks good character moments. Connie gets a quiet display of her growing emotional intelligence in the back-to-back scenes of Jamie’s admission of multiple rejections and the rewrite of Garnet’s letter. In the first scene, after hearing all about Jamie’s emotionally vulnerable state, she sees no issue with handing him another rejection and has to be stopped by Steven; whether or not ripping off the bandage is the right course of action, Connie’s reaction shows a distinct lack of tact. But in the second scene, she’s the head writer of the revamped letter (using the power of torrid soap opera know-how); even if she and Steven are way off-track in terms of how romance works here, she understands the problem and wants to help.

Little slip-ups and corrections like these do a great job of showing how far Connie has come from Bubble Buddies without losing the realistic awkwardness that makes her so endearing. Her disadvantage to Steven on the emotional intelligence front also continues to even out their relationship, as she schools him in book smarts throughout the series and will soon become a far more capable tactical fighter to his natural talent, a la Katara and Aang. Just because Steven isn’t an idiot and Connie isn’t emotionless doesn’t mean their differences have to go away, and Love Letters is a great example of her lower-key foil duty in action.

Garnet is mostly great as the oblivious, then apathetic subject of Jamie’s affection. Her sexualized emergence from the sea is played for laughs thanks to over-the-top visual effects and Estelle’s exaggerated sultriness. Visually, while her introduction may evoke classic Birth of Venus imagery, the more amusing sight gag can be found in the, erm, interesting positioning of Jamie’s mailsack malebag mailbag as he’s filled with sudden lust:

But back to Garnet. Her instant and insistent dismissal of Jamie may be cold, but it’s fair and faithful to her character: Garnet is locked down on the relationship front, and we’ve seen how little she cares about the feelings of human strangers from her interactions with Kofi (and her general demeanor). She benefits from having little to do with Steven and Connie’s scheming, which makes her another victim of poor communication who gets fed up with what she perceives to be a pushy admirer instead of doubling down on her bluntness to a point that might make her seem mean; it also reinforces how important is to take the feelings of both people involved in a crush into account.

Even so, my biggest/only issue with Love Letters is her final conversation with Jamie, where she dismisses his infatuation as a performance. I guess I get that she’s trying to let him down easier than before and is putting things in a way he understands, but there’s a much better way to differentiate between love and a crush than essentially saying his crush is delusional. As someone who’s had crushes and has been in love, sure, the latter is strong enough to make the former look tame in retrospect. But that doesn’t make infatuation an act, and for a show that’s all about feelings, Steven Universe could do way better at explaining Garnet’s point of view without being condescending about someone’s emotions (especially the emotions of a young audience).

That said, Jamie’s response is somewhat true: local theater, at least, is really solid advice.

Future Vision!

Beyond local theater being in the future, Love Letters gets a nice resolution in Jamie insisting that he’s moved on in I Am My Mom. And then we get to see that, uh, nope, he’s still holding the torch as of Reunited.

Our introduction to Barb is a long time coming, and the fact that she knows Greg telegraphs their low-key and largely off-screen friendship.

If every pork chop were perfect, we wouldn’t have inconsistencies…

Despite Garnet proclaiming that love at first sight doesn’t exist, The Answer more or less shows Ruby and Sapphire’s relationship to be just that. Maybe they spent more time on the surface getting to know each other than it seems, but as per its fairy tale nature, love springs up pretty much immediately. (And it’s great! But maybe don’t have that person be against the notion of instant love.)

We’re the one, we’re the ONE! TWO! THREE! FOUR!

I enjoy the goofiness here and the dedication to a farcical format for a theatrical character, and as I said, the acknowledgment that time is an actual factor for this show earns some points. But beyond not sticking the landing, and it’s honestly just a little too broad to be a favorite.

Top Fifteen

Steven and the Stevens

Mirror Gem

Lion 3: Straight to Video

Alone Together

The Return

Jailbreak

Rose’s Scabbard

Coach Steven

Giant Woman

Winter Forecast

On the Run

Warp Tour

Maximum Capacity

The Test

Ocean Gem

Love ‘em

Laser Light Cannon

Bubble Buddies

Tiger Millionaire

Lion 2: The Movie

Rose’s Room

An Indirect Kiss

Space Race

Garnet’s Universe

Future Vision

Marble Madness

Political Power

Full Disclosure

Joy Ride

Like ‘em

Gem Glow

Frybo

Arcade Mania

So Many Birthdays

Lars and the Cool Kids

Onion Trade

Steven the Sword Fighter

Beach Party

Monster Buddies

Keep Beach City Weird

Watermelon Steven

The Message

Open Book

Story for Steven

Shirt Club

Love Letters

Enh

Cheeseburger Backpack

Together Breakfast

Cat Fingers

Serious Steven

Steven’s Lion

Joking Victim

Secret Team

Say Uncle

No Thanks!

     4. Horror Club      3. Fusion Cuisine      2. House Guest      1. Island Adventure

[lichamonae]

The most beautiful smile

Ok guys, this is it, the eremika fanfic, hope you like it.

This is 4 years after reaching the ocean.

Pairing:  Eremika

Words:  4,000 ~

Rating: Very innocent <3

---------------------------

Wow, I´m tired – She smiles at the reconstructed house, while takes her sweat off her forehead. She is not a smiley person, like, at all; but when she smiles it is very special for her, it´s another level experience in her life.

She ducks to grab her garden tools left in the floor and watches her beautiful white dress *great* – It´s all dirty and wet, I need to take care of my formal clothes, I´m still not get used to be so dressed up. - She shakes off the dirt and enters to the pretty little house.

It looks very different of what it was, but she could not remember all the details. She´s very sure the kitchen counter was in the right side of the house, and the living room wasn’t that big. The walls are a little bit lighter, and the modern fashion took over in some furniture. She just couldn´t find anywhere the same jar she used to put flowers in for Mrs. Jaegar 10 years ago.

Ten years ago…

What kind of person lives everything she lived this past 10 years and still stays alive?, Nobody cares, she thought.

In her room there is a bit amount of her stuff (well, she doesn´t have much), but almost all stayed in the recluts house, even the scarf. She changes and takes off her pony tail. She looks at the mirror – I´m so different. - She can tell is not a girl anymore, like she always have been very tall and strong, always looking bigger than she was, but this was different.

Her face´s shape was more defined, her hair has been growing and growing this past years. She really didn´t care about cutting it anymore, and it was almost getting to the waist – I need to cut it now - But she really liked how it looks on her. Her figure was more delicated than before; she used to do exercises once in a while now so her muscles where less marked. She was relieved about that for some reason.

She looked just like a normal girl, but she wasn´t a normal girl.

*knock knock*

She heard the sound of the door, she wasn´t expecting anybody, but maybe is him – No, is not; maybe they sent Armin again.

-Mikasa! I know you are here, open the door. – She heard Armin's voice *exhales*

Is not that she doesn´t want to see him, she loves Armin with all her heart. But since everything was revealed, she just could not bear watching her best friends die.  And that big fight Eren and she had was too much for her to support; what she was thinking anyways? Who was her to make him change his mind?

-Hi! – She hugged him really tight that he couldn't breathe.

-Oh, *coughs* wow, hi! Stop showing off Mikasa.

-Welcome home, Armin.

She makes the dinner for him and gives him a tea while the meal is ready. Her skills in the kitchen always have been good, but she has been improving. Armin asks himself is there is something that she just couldn´t do.

-Mikasa, wow. Something like this I can't eat it where do I live, you know.

She sits down and stares at him, almost with threatening eyes – So who send you this time?, Levi? Hanji? Sasha???.

-You know Sasha cries all over the place when she misses you… this tea is so great, did Levi teaches you? – He sips his tea without looking Mikasa in the eyes.

-E… eren? It was Eren?

Armin, suddenly looks down, then looks at the ceiling and finally all the house. - You made an amazing job in here, the last time I came there was only one room and the basement; But now, it's like you've recreated the whole house ... Even built just two rooms.

Silence. Armin always was like this, he always perceives others feelings and movements and uses it against them. And he was very persuasive, this kid is dangerous.

-I think you wanna leave in the morning, so if you have something to say, say it now. – Mikasa breaks the silence; she knows what all this is about. They want her, her strength, her skills, and her will to protect Eren no matter what. But she can´t protect him anymore, she can´t protect something that is doomed. Is like they were already dead, she has already lost everything.

-Mikasa, two years ago, he didn't mean all the things he said. He didn’t mean to figth with you like he did. Of all the people around you, Eren is the one who cares the most about you. Even Jean felt sorry for him... well after he almost kills him for talking to you like that.

-“I will wrap it as many times as I need to” – Mikasa says looking in the distance, very nostalgic. Her heart starts to feel this whole again.

-That´s what he said to you right? I mean, that’s what he told me that happened that day.

Mikasa looks at Armin with surprised. Why in the world Eren would talk about that? that was very personal. They were going to die and she tried to ki…

-He told me that maybe, just maybe you tried to kiss him – Armin looked at her with embarrassment while saying those words, he was waiting to Mikasa break the table and kicking him out of the house.

Mikasa relaxed, and breathed very very deeply. *just breathe* *just pretend he didn´t said that*

- Eren and me are very important to you Mikasa, I know Sasha is very important too. If you want us to go and fight without you, I´ll understand, but I know that you won´t never do that. I told you the last time that it was probably that this war was far away, but some soldiers were informed that they are now coming here and they want us dead. They need my titan, Annie and Eren´s to win this. But if we don´t have you, if you don´t protect him, we are screwed.

-Don´t you have Levi? he is enough for all of you, he will protect him.

-Mikasa, I… told him that I will not tell you but, you deserve to know it.

Mikasa felt her cold sweat in her head and arms. She was reckless of leaving Eren on his own this past two years. He needs her, Armin needs her. The only thing Mrs. Jeager told her to do was protect Eren, and she just leave him.

-Eren is coming here, I know this is the selfishest thing in the world, but we need to recover our pride, we deserve to be free. We deserve to live in this world the years that we have left. –Armin stands up and with determination says this words to Mikasa.

She felt how Armin was so brave to say those words to her. Even two years ago, Armin could not stop her.

What happened two years ago was something she didn´t want to think about...

She had been through all stages of lost: Shock, denial, anger, despair, acceptance. This happened, one, two times now? Three, but this time she could not accept it, she couldn´t be angry, she just have to watch the only two humans she cared about just die, the only two persons who live deep in her heart.

They were preparing and developing strategies to contra attack the race who wants them dead. They even were strong enough to fight back those big metal monsters. The titans by their side were very strong, Eren and Armin were very strong. Levi and Mikasa were doing their thing too by taking over the machines and capturing people to gain information. They were two very busy years, and the odds were in their favor. The people inside the walls, the Erdians have a chance to win, to live. But Mikasa just was feeling worst and worst every passing day.

She never looked at the calendar, she stopped every person to celebrated birthdays. She just looked how Eren and Armin´s life were fading, little by little. And they were so, happy? Like if they weren´t weapons, if they weren´t used by the whole humanity inside the walls. Then she started to feel used as well.

-What are you saying, are you out of your mind? – Eren said very angry at her while Mikasa was grabbing him by his arm. This was the second time they were fighting this week, Mikasa wanted to stop him to leave to another misson.

-All that I want is to you to live, maybe you will just die sooner, sooner than your miserable life span – Mikasa was already crying quietly, but her words were very solid and demanding.

- If you don´t want to come, don´t do it, if you want to all humanity die, just wish for it. Until we don't murder them, we are not free, we are not even alive.

Eren screams were very audible tho. Jean, Sasha, Connie and other recluts were listening everything from Eren´s room while they were preparing for leaving.

-They have been fighting like 2 hours now, and Eren is just saying the same bullshit, I´m gonna end this now – Jean was going to Eren´s room but Connie stopped him.

-Don´t be ridiculous. Mikasa would murder you if you stand there, let them have this marriage moment.

-They are not marriage, you asshole, he is just a dick to her all the fucking time and he doens´t even care about her. – Jean said with venom in his mouth, he was just tired of watching her been depressed.

Eren came out of the room yelling at Mikasa and putting his uniform, while Mikasa was behind him. She tried to help him putting on his equipment, but Eren take her off.

-You are not coming – Said Eren with a salty voice

-The you are just gonna die there

-Then I will fucking die, I don´t want your protection anymore. I want to this protecting bullshit stops now.

Mikasa was still putting her scarf, like she was not listening to him, and the others in the living room look other ways, the place was very tense. Eren´s words are always very harsh, but right now he was really pissed off.

They all started to leave the house, but Eren stopped Mikasa.

-I said, you are not going.

Mikasa looked deadly at Eren´s eyes – I´m coming.

-I´m not saying not you to fight, I´m saying you are not coming because of me anymore. If I´m going to die soon I´m going to give everything for our freedom, and you are selfish enough to want me to stop; so that´s the deal.

-I´m going to take you home, where you can live your last years in peace away of all this bullshit

-What fucking house Mikasa? That house is ruinned, that life is ruined. You can´t just pretend this not existed and build a happy family.

In that moment, was the first time in all her life that she really hate him.

”I will wrap it as many times as I need to”

What a liar

-Then I will build a fucking house! –she yelled at him

All of the soldiers turned back to Eren and Mikasa. They could not tell what they just heard. That was Mikasa yelling at Eren. She yelled at him!.

Armin just could not believe. She punched him many times back then, but because he was reckless boy, but this was different.

She was very different, this was not Mikasa. She was thinking now for her, and not just for Eren.

Armin tried to stop her, but she just got in her horse and went as fast as she could. She did it so fast than her scarf fell on the floor, she didn’t even care.

----------

 -I´m a selfish person now Armin, I´m selfish too. I was expecting to Eren just come here, build the house again and try to live like normal people, but we are not normal, I´m not a normal girl.

-Mikasa, I don´t know why the three of us meet, why suddenly we ended up trying to save humanity, but it feels like we all three were destiny to be together, to save this stupid cause. We are not meant to be happy, you know? but I think that if we are together again, we are going to be happy. With the years I have left, the only think that will make me happy is being with you and Eren.

She wanted to hold her tears, be strong but she was afraid to see him again, and then she realized.

-Wait Armin, is he coming here? When is he…

Too late

The door was open, his figure was there. Shit

When she saw Armin a year ago she was shocked. He looked more mature, his factions were more rough and manly. He was so sweet looking, and thanks to that people always look down of him, for his weakness. But now, she was sure that´s not the case anymore. She even though he was a very handsome man, even with more presence than Capitan Erwin back then.

But this was different, because Eren´s eyes were the only thing she could see. His eyes were very big and green, there was a bright light on them, even if his life was fading. Those eyes were looking the whole place. The kitchen, then Mikasa, the table, Mikasa, the rooms, Mikasa. She could not look away of those eyes.

Silence again. What an awkward day.

-Mi..

-Er..

Armin watched the two jerks saying nothing. Looking at each other, mumbling their names, he wanted to laugh, but clearly was not the moment.

Armin took his tea and yawns like he was very tired. – Well, I´m going to rest in one of the rooms Mikasa, so good night both of you.

He left them alone.

Eren was still in the entrance of the house, and Mikasa was still looking at his eyes. He closed the door behind him and took a sit, Mikasa went to the kitchen.

She offered him tea and sat down again in the chair in front of him. She now was looking at some fabric in Eren´s neck. Oh

-Ah… I forgot I have it, take it. – Eren could tell that Mikasa was looking the scarf and took it off. He offered to Mikasa, but she didn´t take it so Eren left it above table

-I´m…

Eren wanted to say something, but he couldn´t. She was, so…mature now. Her hair was so long, shinny. He now understood why Jean was so impressed about Mikasa the first time he saw her.

*Is this how Jean felt the first time he saw Mikasa?* because he was maybe feeling the same, how… how beautiful” He left himself thinking that.

-I´m sorry – finally said Eren.

-I´m sorry too

- I told Armin to leave you alone, I don´t want you to come, but this all shit is going to start again, and I can´t go without talking to you.

-You, don´t want me to come? – Said Mikasa while looking down, he´s saying the same cruel things like back then.

Eren didn´t understand what she was looking so sad, and then he saw Armin in the edge of one of the room´s door doing signs to him. *abort?, what do you mean by… oh fuck*

-No, no, no, that´s not what I meant... Look at this place, you recreated this with all your effort. It is hard for me been here, in our house were everything started, where everything went to hell. But you been here, and doing this, is telling me that I have to be strong for you. Even if you don´t want to fight beside me.

Eren instantly grabbed her hand, she stopped breathing, Armin gasped behind the room´s door.

-What I came to tell you is that, I don´t want to spend the rest of my few years thinking that you are here, alone and hurt because of me. I want you to say good bye to me with a big smile, because your smiles are very rare and precious to me.

*thanks for wrapping this scarf – smiles* they were going to die, and the only thing she could do is thank him, and giving him the most beautiful and biggest smile she had.

Then she suddenly felt the warm of his hand. That hand was very different too. Was a hand of a man, she wanted to fight with him again.

If he was going to fight and die, she will do it too. She will die for him, but this time it would be different, she wasn’t have to protect him, because she felt with his hand he would protect her.

This was the first time she felt he was doing what he promised.

-I´m had plenty of time to think about what happened, and why you left. I´m not a child anymore Mikasa.

*Armin stop fucking smiling* He was trying not to watch Armin behind the door losing his shit.

-Eren... you are tired, I think we should sleep.

*what I did wrong?*

-Don´t… don´t you are going to say anything? – Eren said while grabbing her hand closer with concern.

-I need to think about it, although you said that, Armin is asking me to fight. So I need to consider that, you can sleep in my room where Armin is.

She stands, but no one stopped grabing hands. They looked in the eyes. Mikasa was holding that thought, but she could not anymore.

*Eren told me that maybe you tried to kiss him* Armin you little…

-Good night, Eren. – she finally take her hand off Eren´s and went directly to the main room. She went to bed, and remembered that her pajama was not in that room.

*Perfect, I can´t even move*

She was so embarrassed that she could not talk to Eren about anything. She coul not respond to all those beautifull words that he said to her, because she was so embarrassed. She had already decided to go when she saw how much Eren had grown mentally. She tought all this time that he had already forgot about her.

That night she slept well, because it was the last night of her normal life.

Eren and Armin had to sleep in the same bed. Armin was sleeping very peacefully, but Eren could not stop thinking.

-Armin, hey Armin. Are you sleep?

-Now I´m not, jerk.

-Did I fucked up? With her?

- I think you did just fine.

-I need more than fine, I mean, the last time I practically broke her heart.

-That’s because you´re stupid, and don´t think before opened your big mouth. And that´s why the humanity lost one of their strongest soldiers.

-Thanks Armin, I wanted to feel better, thanks really.

-What I´m saying is that even if it took you this long to came here and said those things to Mikasa, it was worth it. If she come with us, or don´t; that doesn´t matter, because it was worth it.

-I just think that I fucked up, she even didn´t grabbed her scarf... - He said while grabbing the red scarf closer to his face.

-Eren?

-Yeah?

-Don´t you think that Mikasa is the most beautiful woman you have ever seen in this world?. I mean, our world is small compared of what it really is but, I can´t imagine a girl more beautiful than her.

-Wha…..what are you saying that of all the sudden?

-All of the sudden Eren?, you almost confessed to her back there, I just thought that thinking about how she looks is more pleasant than thinking about all this mess.

Eren sighs deeply, Armin was right. He could this night be a normal guy, thinking about the beauty of a woman, he could left that happeded just for tonight.

-I bet Jean is going to loose his mind when he sees her! – Armin says while he was laughing, trying to no laugh hard for Mikasa to hear him.

-Don´t be ridiculous, he´s with that new small girl with black hair, remember?

-Oh, yeah I know, but you know that he has been always nuts about Mikasa. He can´t see you without hate in his eyes since she left.

-Armin, don´t be stupid, we don´t even know is she´s coming with us.

Armin smiled at him, he couldn´t belive how dense Eren is. He doesn´t know if he needs to push him more, but he thinks is the only choice to make this years to really worth. Maybe is not fair for Mikasa to live with that while they are dying in front of her, but they could even die in the war that is coming, so…

-Eren, are you sure she was trying to kiss you ? that day?

Eren looked at Armin with fear, he told him that never again talk about that, this guy has no limits.

-I mean, If that is true I think that now that I talked her about that moment she problably could come.

*For gods sake Armin you did not*

-I told her, sorry. I´m sure that this is selfish, but I want the three of us to fight and win. And then come here once in a while and hang out with you guys, like back then…

Armin knew for sure that Eren was freaking out, because he wasn´t even breathing, but it was the last card for him. With Mikasa they have all the cards to play that deadly game. He was satisfied with what he did, he was very happy, that was a very happy night.

Eren didn´t say anything, what who could he say? Fuck you Armin? Bad bad Armin?. These four years he has changed so much, he had became the lider they all needed, even if he has to do bad things, he will do anything to fulfill their meta, even do things like saying THAT to Mikasa.

*She is not going to come*

The next morning Eren wake up very late, he was over thinking the whole night and slept very late. He went to the bathroom to wash his face and then he remembered he was in his house.

Now that Mikasa wasn´t in front of him, been there felt so overwhelming. It was like a dream been there, in that house, thanks to her. He was so nervious to go to the living room and not seen his mom doing breakfast, or his dad reading the newspaper. He took a big breath and went there.

The breakfast was already in the table and Armin was eating very fast.

-It´s very late Eren, we have to leave asap.

She wasn´t there, sure that she just prepared breakfast and went out to not confront him. He didn´t want to confront her either.

He took his plate and eat as fast as he could, and then she came out of her room.

-I can´t belive that this still fits me, Armin do I take my  3DMG? Or you think it´s not worth it?

She was wearing the whole uniform, and Eren just felt how his heart made a big jump in his chest.

-We will give you another, the tech team have changed some things, you will do it fine with the new desing.

Eren couldn´t take his eyes out of her. It was so nostalgic, but at the same time, she looked so different. Now he understood what Armin was talking about.

-Eren, eat faster, we need to leave. –Mikasa said to him , like if the last two years haven´t happened at all.

-Ok… I´ll hurry.

They took the horses and left, but before they take a look at the house, their house.

-Thanks Mikasa, this means so much to me, the house, I mean. – Eren said to her. Mikasa was still looking at the house that took her two years to build. Maybe she wouldn´t see it again, but it doesn´t matter, because her house is where Eren and Armin are.

-Gotta get going, they are waiting for us-  Armin said and started riding the horse in direction to shinganshina´s outside door.

-Ok, hug me tight, we need to go faster.- Eren said while Mikasa was climbing the horse.

Some of her hair got stucked in her jacket and she got upset – I think is time for cutting my hair again, you know for the 3DMG.

- Don´t, It looks great on you. *oh good, why I just said that* - just… agh do a pony tail or whatever, let´s go, we will explain the strategy in the way.

-----

*See you later, Eren*

She said with her precious smile, the one it was for him with a tear in her eyes.

     ���������������3/��~�"

[wp-yahoo-style-1042-yahoopa-blog]

One Veteran Actress Concurs That Yes, It's 'Pretty Hard' For Women in Hollywood

Zoey Deutch (Photo: Getty Images)

Last night, Hollywood’s Chateau Marmont was buzzing with beautifully brave women – and Jon Hamm – to celebrate actress Zoey Deutch as the 2017 Women In Film Max Mara Face of the Future Award recipient. She will be awarded formally at tonight’s Crystal+Lucy Awards where Elizabeth Banks and Tracee Ellis Ross, among others, will be honored for making change in Hollywood.

Hamm – whose most recent film Baby Driver releases the end of this month – was chatty and social. And he’s a big supporter of women, like Gal Gadot in the smash Wonder Woman, showing Tinseltown that there’s no such thing as a cinematic glass ceiling.

“I’ve had the very good fortune to work with a lot of really talented women on both sides of the camera and I hope that that ceiling is cracked enough that it comes down, because it’s silly,” Hamm told Yahoo Style.

Veteran actress Shohreh Aghdashloo stepped in for some real talk about how tough women have it.

“It’s been pretty hard, not just for me, but for every female in this industry. It’s not that guys don’t like us — guys like their club. They’d rather do it together then sharing it with us. But they also need us, so let’s just take the opportunity and work with them – shoulder to shoulder.”

Nearly all the attendees were donned in head-to-toe MaxMara and so we couldn’t help but wonder: what’s their go-to power outfit?

“I have a problem with big coats,” said Madelyn Deutch, who has worked as an actress but thinks of herself as a writer first and is releasing The Year of Spectacular Men, her first feature film, this week at the Los Angeles Film Festival. It’s a family affair: her mother Lea Thompson directed and sister/honoree of the night Zoey Deutch co-starred in it.

Molly Sims (Photo: Getty Images)

Lea Thompson (Photo: Getty Images)

“The guy I’m dating asked me if we could please go out when not wearing nine trench coats. But I’m like, ‘No. Nine trench coats is my default.’ It’s one coat, but I can’t help myself, it looks like nine because they’re so big. For some reason, I love dusters and floor length big, boss coats. Maybe it makes me feel like [that kind of] boss dude with a big cigar.”

For Scandal politico Bellamy Young, it’s all about the footwear: “I like an amazing pair of heels and they can make me feel invincible. I wore these boots on Lip Sync Battle that as of now I still do not own, but they are aspirational for me. They’re Cesare Paciotti and they have all these buckles and they were like hell on wheels.”

Lea Thompson and Yael Grobglas (Jane the Virgin) agreed: It’s in the shoes. “I have some incredible boots that I wear,” said Thompson. “Sorel made all these crazy new boots — they made these super-cute high boots. I got them as swag at Sundance and I put them on and I felt like a badass. There’s something about boots that make you feel ready to run.”

Grobglas added that feeling empowered is her reason for having lots of shoes. “I pick a pair based on the person I want to be that day. That’s my battle outfit.”

Read more from Yahoo Beauty + Style:

‘Wonder Woman’ Gal Gadot Feels ‘Very Sexy and Very Strong’ in Her Costume

The Glorious Reason Connie Britton Won’t Have Plastic Surgery

Kate Mara Owns a ‘Remarkable’ Number of Sweatpants

The Insulting Roles ‘Pirates’ Star Kaya Scodelario, 25, Won’t Take

Iconic Supermodel Linda Evangelista Admits the Unthinkable: ‘I Like Wrinkles’

‘Swimsuit’ Stunner Kate Upton Says She’s ‘Still Not Confident in a Bathing Suit’

Follow us on Instagram, Facebook, and Pinterest for nonstop inspiration delivered fresh to your feed, every day. For Twitter updates, follow @YahooStyle and @YahooBeauty.

[cupcakeshakesnake]

Watching SU for the first time: SE 1 ep 37~42

Alone Together

Well I’ll be damned

-Sexual innuendos

-HOLY SHIT WTF??

-WHAT

-CONNIE WAS A GEM?!?!?!

-WHAT

-HOW THE FUCK DID HE FUSE WITH A HUMAN

-GARNET’S REALLY HAPPY FOR SOME REASON

-BUT WHAT ABOUT CONNIE

-IS SHE OKAY

-BUT HOW

-GEMS ARE MADE OF MAGIC OR SOME SHIT BUT HUMANS ARE FLESH AND BONE. HOW THE FUCK IS CONNIE ALIVE

-I am so WTF-ing right now

-(Is that like their combines height)

-”You are not two people and you are not one person.”  Yes, Stevonnie, you are exactly 1.5 people.

-Don’t do it

-SHE FUCKING DID IT

-OR IS THAT A HE

-I DON”T EVEN

-Sour’s head looks like a banana

-AIRHORNS

-”KIDS’ SHOW”

-*finger quotes intensifying*

-FUCK OFF YOU PURPLE PEDOPHILE

-THAT’S LITERALLY TWO SEVEN-ISH-YEAR-OLDS FUSED TOGETHER

-So Steven wants to dance and Connie wants to get out of there.

-HOW THE FUCK IS EVERYONE SO OKAY WITH THIS

-what the fuck

The Test

-Is that food monopoly

-Uh oh

PFFFT

-Good luck making Steven pulp

-and slicing Steven in half

-And burning him

-That’s basically what it feels like to play in god mode

-Annnd there’s the builder experience

-”H O O  H O O   H O O”

Future Vision

-Ouch.

-He is not Steven Danger Universe nor is he Steven Cutiepie Universe.

-WHY IS THE RADIO CALLING OUT NUMBERS IN KOREAN

-There are some Korean names in the opening credits.. And they’re hinting a lot at their nationality...? I guess? It’s just that as a Korean, this is a... pleasant surprise. See, when you’re watching an American cartoon show, and then suddenly you hear your native language streaming into your ears outta nowhere in the middle of an ocean full of English...

-Them eyebrows

-Do not tempt fate, Steven.

-OUCH

-Those aren’t wasps, those are Beedrills.

-Nicely done Garnet, Steven is paranoid now.

-STEVEN IT’S NOT EVEN A SHARP KNIFE  IT’S A FLIPPING BUTTER KNIFE

-HOLY FUCK THE LIGHTNING

On The Run

-Uh oh.

-Those mentos robots again.

-This bodes ill.

-”Some gems, like your mother, Garnet, and myself”  Nice leaving out Amethyst there.

-Be careful what you wish for.

-I saw that hanky-tied-to-a-stick in a cartoon when I was like 5 and I tried to imitate it, but turns out it’s a very inefficient way of packing.

-yay Amethyst is singing!

-Wouldn’t Pearl be like HOLY JESUS WHERE IS STEVEN by now

-Stupid Racoon?

-Ohhh so that’s why Pearl left out Amethyst. Because she’s not a Homeworld gem.

-Doesn’t look much like a kindergarten...

-Those machines look like viruses.  The viruses that infect human cells.

-Wait... if those things work like viruses, ok lemme guess  1. The machine thing is sent from Homeworld to Earth, and it uses its drill to bury the gem seeds or eggs or whatever into the ground, much like a virus infecting a cell with its DNA. 2. The earth of the area is infected with gem seeds. 3. Gems hatch, flooding the place. But, question: What happened to the other hatchlings?

-Apparently this world doesn’t have things like Google Earth.

-Well that got really dark.

-HOLY SHIT

-WELL THE WHEEL THING’S A FIRST

-THE SPEAR ROCKET THING’S A FIRST TOO

-HOLY SHIT

-WHAT THE FUCK

-t a c t

-This episode went from

to

in 0.0347 seconds flat

-aaaaaaawwwgh my feeeeeels

aawww

-Much foreshadowing, such wow.

Horror Club

-cringe

-I don’t think someone whose leg is being eaten alive will have the wits to actually state that fact.

-Are you KIDDING me, scarecrows are made of straw

-Ronaldo IS an ass.

-Wonder who that gem is

Winter Forecast

-There, Beach City is finally unstuck from summer. Wait, where’s its autumn?

-A SNEEZE DOESN’T MEAN YOU’RE FUCKING SICK

-Did Steven go back in time again, or was it a dream? Like Inception?

-Whoa, Steven is pretty good at playing the guitar. It’s even as big as he is.

-He can just dig up the snow and find the keys...?

-Uh oh.

-I

-OHH so it is more like Inception

-awkward staring

[captainurahara]

tagged by: @letsriddlemethislucifer tagging: @sakanxde, @elat-us,  @all-of-the-muses, @redbirdwandering, @bevorzug-t, @viciousvizard, @kxchisake (if you all haven’t done it and would like to!)

GENERAL name: Anna

birthday: February 21st

sexual orientation: Bisexual

school status: Sophomore in college

YES/NO drink?: Occasionally

smoke?:  Never have, hopefully never will

eat cake?: Yes. A lot. I love sweets!

believe in true love?: Yeah! But like... in a realistic sense I guess? I’ve never dated but I’m neither optimistic or pessimistic about it. There’s no way that only one person is meant for another, I think people are meant for many other people. If we were only meant for one person in this world then we would never meet them, there’s over 7 billion of us after all! It’s statistically a very low chance you would ever personally meet “the one and only.” There are people out there who will click with you and there are people out there who won’t. Finding someone who is right for you is difficult but it’s possible. And to continue to make things work, both people must choose to love each other and put in effort. I consider anyone who clicks with another and puts in effort and chooses to love you to be “true love,” and more than one person can fit that criteria. (Maybe not all at the same time, though. We meet new people in our different stages of life; what may have been “true love” in our teens may not be the same as “true love” as an older adult.)

afraid of the dark?: No, but I am afraid of things that *could* be in the dark like killers...

cat person?: Yeah but I’m also a dog person. I love both! I’ve only had dogs as pets so far though

virgin?:  Yep

FAVORITES shampoo:  Herbal Essences, though I wish I was rich enough to get more expensive kinds...

disney song:  “Why Should I Worry”, Oliver and Company. Love that Billy Joel + Disney

actress/actor: Idris Elba. God I love him. Probably more but I can’t think of them

car: I had a junky Jeep once, and tbh I want another, just... less junky.

person: Fave people in my life? My family and close friends of course

type of weather: Rain and thunderstorms, especially in the summer

color: Green, of any shade. But I also really like other bright colors & neon colors, (cerulean blue, scarlet red, hot pink, cyan, neon orange, etc.) + black. I’m an artist so it’s hard to choose

90s sitcom: Fresh Prince

QUESTIONS

what is your special talent/skill as a roleplayer?  I can make things look pretty, I guess, and I can make art. Graphic design is my passion. (Yeah I’m saying that sincerely too, I’m a graphic design major)

what is your favorite type of roleplay genre, and why? Comedy and fluff! Real life is already depressing enough for me, so I use humor and cute things to distract me, make me laugh, or make me happy. Personally, focusing on angst or screwed up scenarios too much doesn’t help me mentally. A little bit of it makes things interesting, though!

why did you pick your muse?

Kisuke has been a long time favorite character for me. I love how complex he is as a character... I love his duality. He’s light and goofy and eccentric, but also dark and serious and cunning. And he’s a very flexible and versatile muse too. Despite his complexity and how difficult it appears to be to play him due to his high intelligence, I feel that because he can adapt so easily to situations and people, it actually makes him an easy first muse. I was really scared about playing him on a public online space because I wasn’t certain if anyone would like my interpretation, and ended up holding off playing him publicly for 2 years (plus I was dealing with other stuff.) I’m glad I was finally brave enough to try, because it’s been fun!

And for Tessai, I just really started to love him as a character the more I thought about his relationship with Urahara, Yoruichi, and the kids. He doesn’t get enough credit for doing the things he has done, and I believe that taking his character and expanding it through RP would make me feel really happy. I’m kinda one of the few people who actually like this character, so I want to really make him my own.

if you could write any other muse - but know you don’t have the muse for him/her - who would it be? Lots of Bleach characters, probably the “less popular” ones or background characters. Jinta, Ururu, Don Kanonji, Hachi, Kon, Isane, and Hidetomo Kajomaru come to mind. Baby Nel, Pesche, and Dondochakka would also be fun because they’re weird and silly. Comic relief characters in general would be easy for me to play. For other fandoms, I would love trying Connie or Sadie from Steven Universe, Dipper or Mabel from Gravity falls, Coran from Voltron or any of the Paladins, Sokka from Avatar the Last Airbender, and Bolin from the Legend of Korra, or any robot from Transformers (it’s hard for me to pick one though.)

what is one thing you think you need to work on as a partner? Everything!... Well no, not really. I think communicating how I’d like things to go is a big issue due to my anxiety. I do try but sometimes I just have so much trouble. Also I need to figure out a system that works so I don’t lose or forget ongoing threads...I know I’ve already lost a few. I also need to work on noticing where it’s a good time to either wrap up threads or drop them if I can’t finish for whatever reason. I end up not knowing where to stop and keep going and going until my partner drops.

what would be your warning label to other roleplayers?

#Slow Replier. Really, really slow. Turtle slow. Grandma-walking-across-the-street slow

#Anxious as hell

#Shy as hell

#May goof around a lot

#Basically a marshmallow of a person. Soft, cute, squishy

#Wants to be your friend but doesn’t know how

#Will probably offer to make art for you if we’re friends. Only fulfills these offers 10% of the time so no offense, I have plenty of ideas, just no energy to get ‘em done

#Depressed and stressed but tries her best

what is your favorite episode/scene of your muse?

ALL.

what crack!ships do you have for your muse?

For Kisuke? Anyone and everyone in Bleach. He’s a shippable guy! As for Tessai... that’s tough because no one ships him with anyone, darnit. I don’t consider Tessai and Yoruichi a crack ship, honestly. Maybe Tessai + any of the Visoreds... that would be interesting. Especially him and Hachi! It’d be very cute.

what is your senpai blog?

Basically everyone I tagged in this, plus more. Lol I’m pretty new to this so I consider everyone my senpai~

[dia-luneris]

Defender of the Realm

"They say he's the warrior of light... Like the stories" A voice in the background spoke, in awe. His friend questioned the idea "I heard he's just some adventurer, some midlander looking for glory".

Elenion listened in, then posed a question to her group "So what do you all think? I heard House Fortemps took this man in, and that it was he, along with the Scions who helped defend us". Scar sat beside the hearth, her legs crossed "He could be special for all we know... They do say that there were four warriors of light, back before the Calamity hit. So there being one, doesn't sound too crazy". Lady listened, considering what was said "It's true... He could be what they say. But I suppose only time will tell..."

Gabriel Sorel walked over with a tankard of ale in each hand. Damien Luneris brought two more over, taking a seat near the others. Gabu handed a drink to Scar, keeping one for himself. Damien held one out for Lady, the other staying in his own hand. It was only Eleni who was not allowed to drink. But she smiled regardless.

She was happy to see the man she considered a brother, back among them. There had to be a change in the group make-up however, as he had changed his role in the party.

Damien had taken to wearing the black armour that his father, and his grandfather had donned before him. The greatsword he had been given, had also accompanied him at his new post.

Considering that three front liners were not needed, Scarlett swapped her axe out for a lance. Following the changes, Lady had converted completely to wielding magic. Elenion kept her axe in hand, however, knowing it better than any other weapon. Gabriel did the same with his own device. The contraption the Lalafell wielded, may as well have been part of him.

-

Khatayin busied herself, tidying up the infirmary. It was dinner time for the patients, so it gave her the chance to put things away, and keep the place orderly. Connie had come over with trays of food for them all. The household servants were also there, distributing food among everyone. Not everyone agreed with Ala-Mhigan cuisine, but the doctor told them it would help keep their airways clear.

Khat smiled at the remark, beneath her hood. She hadn't a problem with spices, having grown up with a varied diet at The Steppe. She was wearing a white hood today, reasoning that it would match her uniform better. Doctor Emal had given her a nurse's uniform, and she had decided that she may as well go with the aesthetic.

"Ah, we meet again" Haurchefant smiled, spotting the hooded girl he had come to think fondly of. Khat's eyes widened, and her face grew flush. She was glad to be wearing a hood "Lord Haurchefant!" She brought herself round to face him "How nice to see you..." Khatayin hated how shy this man made her feel. She was uncomfortable with this feeling. 

He seemed to pick up on it, blinking "Are you well, miss Dagasi??" Khat nodded "Yes, I just got distracted. Things have been busy here". Haurchefant gave an understanding nod "I see. I should have expected as much. I hope I won't be bothersome then, by adding to your burdens. You see, my House has taken on three new wards, and I would like to register them for treatment. They are well... but my father has asked me to have them noted, for future care".

Khatayin looked towards the doctor, seeing he was having a break to eat something. He caught her glance, and gave a nod of approval, for her to take down the names. Khat looked back to her visitor "I can get that sorted out for you. It won't be a problem". Haurchefant smiled "Excellent. Thank you miss, Dagasi" He explained their names, and titles, allowing Khat to note them down. 

Connie watched the two, stood beside her husband's desk "I think she likes him..." she whispered. Emal nodded, smiling "One of his brothers could have come in, he didn't have to do it himself. There is a chance he's grown fond of her as well".

Connie took a tray of food "There is still plenty to go around, would you and your friend like to share some, Khatayin?". Khat whirled round, she stood blinking. Connie nodded at her, as if to say go on. Khat took the chance, once the suggestion sank in. She walked over to Connie, taking the tray "Thank you" she spoke, barely audible. 

Lord Haurchefant was quite intrigued by the prospect of trying something different "I have heard of this cuisine... but have yet to sample it." He stroked his chin, admiring the dish now before him. Taking a fork full, and placing it in his mouth, his eyes grew large. For a moment, Khat was worried... "This is delicious!" the man declared, once the fork was removed "What is it??"

"Roast Karakul" Connie answered "It was marinated in a mixture of spices, along with some lemon juice. I steamed some rice to go with, but it goes nice with salad as well".

The Elezen took another bite, eager to taste more. Khatayin took to her own plate, even more eager to eat hers, now that she had seen his reaction. This was turning out to be a good day for her.

They had been busy earlier, dealing with varying patients, ranging from those with illness, to men coming in dragon-related injuries.... So it was easy enough for her to assume, that nothing joyous would happen. She was glad to be proven wrong.

-

Damien Luneris leaned against the stone wall. His breath came out in clouds, dispersing into the cold night. They had come back from their usual patrol, and the others were indoors once more.

Despite being tired, he wanted to be outdoors. Mostly a solitary creature by nature, he had found the constant company to be chafing after a time. He cared for his friends, dearly, but sometimes the silence was welcome. Waiting to recover had taught him to accept his thoughts, and anything that came with them. 

It was meant to attune him to the darker corners of his mind, but it brought an odd sense of peace. He had put duty first for quite some time, but it was liberating to allow himself to wander, at least on a mental level. He had to keep up the appearance of grieving for Elise, after all.

Lady pushed open the doors leading outside, from the mess-hall. The sound of several voices could be heard briefly, until the doors swung closed again. "There you are... How are you holding up?"

"Tired..." Damien answered, his voice lending credence to his words. Lady found a place beside him, pressing her back to the wall herself "Well we did fight a yeti. A friggin big one at that..." Damien smiled, "It was, but it was no match for an angry noble, swinging a war axe". Lady chuckled "Yeah... she really is something". "So are you..." Damien uttered, catching his companion off-guard.

"Your use of magic has really improved. More so, now that you're wearing medium armour. Heavy armour disrupts concentration too much, so it was a good show of skill, that you were able to adapt to it" he explained, causing her to inwardly sigh. 

Lady's eyes looked skyward "I could do better I suppose... Wearing robes would be the more effective thing to do. But my father sent me medium armour, along with my staff". Damien agreed with her father on this point "Robes would be unwise against creatures with claw and fang. I know you aim to stay back, but they can and will find you, when things go south".

"Hmm... speaking of which... We haven't fought any actual dragons yet" she shifted a little, feeling the cold "Not that I'm disappointed, it's just, I feel a little redundant, you know?" Damien nodded,

"Yes, I know what you mean. Believe me, being incapacitated for as long as I was, felt frustrating." He admitted, frowning. Lady brought her hands up, rubbing her arms "I am glad you stayed put though... Khat would have been furious if you ran off..." Damien exhaled "She was" Lady jumped away from the wall in shock "What?! What did you do?!"

"I umm... I did some training with my father... and my wounds opened up again. She was very angry" He confessed. Lady narrowed her eyes in annoyance "Did she hit you? I would have..." 

Damien feigned shock "You would hit your Lord??". Stefania laughed "Well I would certainly be tempted to... You were pretty stupid, doing that". Damien smiled "Yes, it was stupid. But it was useful"

"I'll take your word on it... but seriously, don't do that again". The Midlander warned. "Yes, my Lady..." Damien answered, watching the stars.

-

@thegrumpylizard

[itsworn]

Cackling Nitro Cars Hit Escondido, Barona, and Bakersfield!

Cackle cars coat the eyes, ears, noses, and throats with liquid horsepower.

Nobody is ambivalent about nitromethane. Upon initial exposure to an idling fuel motor, bystanders either sprint away from the sudden assault on eyes, ears, noses, and throats or rush like moths toward the rumble and smell spewing from flaming weedburners and zoomies. Thanks to a curious, noncompetitive activity called cackling, clouds of the stuff are hanging over more places than at any time since drag racing’s golden age a half-century ago—no dragstrip necessary. While supertracks are pricing too many young, impressionable prospects out of the national events that hooked their fathers and granddads, cackling brings tears of joy to the masses at nostalgia meets, neighborhood car shows, and even the SEMA Show. Admission ranges from cheap to free. Even small people can get right up close. Accessibility and proximity depend on how long one can hold one’s breath. (Gas masks are cheating.)

Nitroholics never get enough of the magic juice, though some addicts were seriously tested three times last fall in California. HOT ROD witnessed fuel cars rolling through downtown Escondido one night, push-started on Barona Drag Strip the next day, then cackling and racing at Famoso Raceway three weeks later. Though only one event involved actual competition, this much pop hadn’t gone up in flames in a single month since three rival organizations staged the United Drag Racers Association “Winner” Nationals, American Hot Rod Association Winter (two words) Nationals, and NHRA Winternationals on successive weekends in the mid-1960s. Many of the same drivers, car owners, engine builders, and a legendary announcer who made those Lions, Bee-Line, and Pomona meets so memorable were back on the scene, acting more like rowdy kids than septuagenarians and octogenarians.

This was especially evident at Barona, whose small crowd was top-heavy with heroes. At times, there were more autograph-signers in tents than fans in the ’stands (e.g., grand marshal Bruce Crower, Gary Beck, Jim Brissette, Gary Densham, Larry Dixon Sr., Mendy Fry, Marvin Graham, Red Greth, Rich Guasco, Tom Jobe, Tommy Ivo, Roland Leong, Don Long, Dode Martin, Ed McCulloch, Tom McEwen, Bob Muravez/Floyd Lippencott Jr., Bill Shrewsberry, Joe Schubeck, and Richard Tharp). Retiring announcer Jon “Thunder Lungs” Lundberg, 80, picked the Escondido-Barona double feature as his swan song and miraculously worked night and day without once losing the “Voice of Drag Racing.”

The oldest and youngest of the events were connected by much more than old heroes, old race cars, and old-fashioned loads of 98-percent pop. The newcomer, Steve Gibbs’ inaugural Nitro Revival, owed its existence to the controversial 25th edition that saw him resign his familiar official’s role as the 2016 event opened rather than be forced to enforce the cackling restrictions suddenly ordered by organization headquarters. Shortly thereafter, NHRA’s longtime competition director ended a 48-year relationship by rejecting a consultation contract that “was almost an agreement to stay out of the way,” Gibbs told HRM. “The reunion had become increasingly under the control and operation of the mothership. That all led to what happened in 2016. People came out of there mad, so Ron Johnson and I decided to do something else. Some guys made the choice to go to one, and not the other. A few did both. I didn’t strong-arm anybody.

“You know, the first Cacklefest was an afterthought,” Gibbs continued. “It wasn’t on the 2000 schedule. Greg and I could come up with different things. Everything didn’t have to have the blessing of the mothership. We told the guys that we’d try it if we had time. We pushed off eight cars that Saturday night. It touched a nerve. People started looking for their old cars or building new ones just to cackle. Since then, almost 250 different cars have push-started at some meet or show. Greg and I created a set of rules for them, requiring protective apparel, keeping things reasonable, and fun. I understand NHRA’s concerns, but I think it got to the point where if something might happen, you can’t do it. There’s always an element of risk, and if you can’t try to manage that, then you’re in the wrong business. You don’t want anything to go wrong, but at the same time, it’s motorsports.”

Again this year, Escondido’s Nitro Night and Barona’s Nitro Revival will run back to back on September 28–29, 2018, followed three weeks later by NHRA’s October 19–21 California Hot Rod Reunion. “The reunion was the center of the universe for this group of people for quite a while,” said the guy largely responsible for it. “Now, I’m not sure where that center is, but there needs to be one.”

One thing is for sure: Nostalgia drag racing and the cackle cars it spawned are giving nitroholics everywhere a second golden age of eye, ear, nose, and throat irritation, with no end in sight through that low-hanging, sweet-smelling cloud.

Unlike Civil War reenactors or Renaissance Fair goers, authentic hardware is operated by many of the very same drivers, tuners, and crewpersons who used it in the 1950s and especially the 1960s. Not many 81-year-olds are fit enough to wiggle into—and out of, with some help—a slingshot’s confines, but “TV” Tommy Ivo leaps at opportunities to whack the throttle of Ron Johnson’s reproduction “Barnstormer.” The long-lost original was among fewer than a dozen slingshots built by Rod Pepmuller at the short-lived Ivo Chassis Company.

All kinds of wheeled contraptions come together on Escondido’s Grand Avenue, in turn attracting kids of all ages to a welcoming downtown.

The quantity, quality, and variety of area cruisers far exceed a first-timer’s expectations. Beyond the split-window and Hertz Shelby is Grand Avenue, along which spectators were setting up chairs before noon.

As the supply of surviving slingshots dried up and prices shot up, Ron Johnson—onetime Minnesota Dragways publicist, action photographer, and partner in the Big Wheel fueler—made cloning acceptable by faithfully reincarnating not one, not two, but three of his all-time-favorite 1960s slingshots. Behind the scenes, he’s been instrumental in bringing cackle cars to Escondido and, for the first time this year, to Barona Drag Strip a day later. He was also a two-time cancer victim and one tough hombre, checking out of hospice long enough to enjoy both events. Ten days after hugging Gloria (Mrs. Steve) Gibbs on Grand Avenue, Johnson passed away at home.

Reproducing a particular, personal-favorite car is so commonplace that two clones now exist of the same Surfers’ slingshot, albeit in early versus late iterations. In the course of acquiring period-correct parts to recreate the earliest version, builder Bob Higginson and sole-surviving Surfer Tom Jobe unknowingly obtained what Hilborn identified as the company’s first four-port injector. Jobe reproduced the distinctive scoop. Beyond, sit Ron Johnson’s clones of the Schubert & Herbert Chevy fueler and Ivo’s Barnstormer.

Ironically, the king of making flames for fun is a retired fireman. Bill Pitts (left) decided to make a 392 Chrysler functional to liven up the MagiCar’s static display at early California Hot Rod Reunions. Event directors Steve Gibbs and Greg Sharp invited Pitts to idle the car in the background while announcers read the names of racers and friends who died in the past 12 months. More owners built motors and, boys being boys, lobbied to put their high-gear drivelines to use. Thus did an unscheduled, one-time exhibition accidentally invent the now-trademarked Cacklefest.

Even from behind a restaurant’s glass storefront, side-by-side fuel motors will rattle eardrums. Sarah Beaubara loves her hometown’s annual Nitro Night, but the twins seem undecided.

History’s hottest traditional hot rods are invited to play in the street with dragsters once each year. The Sacramento-based Burkholder brothers hung onto and revived a Chrysler-powered Fiat remembered as one of the north state’s fastest AA/Fuel Altereds.

Canadian Wendy Williams hauled her late father’s famous Top Gasser the length of the West Coast in his original, canvas-topped trailer. Amazingly, the 392 is the same bullet last run by Jack Williams. In the distance are the tower and concession stand. Named for the Barona Band of Mission Indians that owns the reservation property outside Lakeside (San Diego County), eighth-mile Barona Drag Strip was carved out of surrounding hills in layers.

Steve Gibbs, ex-NHRA racemaster turned independent cacklemaster, directed the first commercial gathering of real drag cars at a real dragstrip where no real drag racing occurred. He foresees a profitable future for the Nitro Revival concept here, and possibly at interested venues elsewhere.

With entrants not only allowed but encouraged to push-start or light off fuel motors at will, there wasn’t much quiet time for catching up with old pals. Rich Guasco (left) and Tom McEwen have been shouting over blown fuel motors for six decades.

The newly formed Cacklecar Owners Alliance came up with a new/old twist for Barona’s grand finale, recreating the side-by-side, on-track push-downs that heightened the drama of match-race duels between Chris Karamesines and Tommy Ivo.

As Ron Johnson looked on from the golf cart beside daughter Connie, son Kol Johnson and friend Mark McCormick pulled Ron’s two hobby cars to the line for a side-by-side exhibition launch that closed the single-day Barona program to applause.

Three weeks later at the California Hot Rod Reunion in Bako, on-track practice was offered for drivers of cackle cars and push vehicles, some of whom had never met their respective match. The customized F-100 has just fired the Syndicate Scuderia gas dragster with Wendy Williams aboard.

Unlike either of the single-day, noncompetitive San Diego County shows three weeks prior, Bakersfield’s reunion delivered three full days of for-real fuel racing. Adam Sorokin in the mouse-motored Champion Speed Shop streamliner dropped a close semifinal match to eventual runner-up Jim Murphy, the newly crowned NHRA Hot Rod Heritage Series points champ.

John Hertzig’s Fiat-bodied AA/Fuel Altered demonstrated why a class that NHRA dropped four decades ago not only survives but thrives. By the time photographer Dave Kommel turned to shoot his first downtrack frame, the front tire was already smoking from abuse. Rookie pilot Kurt Cruise somehow kept the shiny side up by repeatedly whacking the throttle—until the right-front wheel and suspension mercifully snapped off, angling the “Awful-Awful” into the right-side wall and a long, grinding halt.

The look on little Crew Young’s mug suggests that nitromethane flows through the veins of father and son. Daddy Jim Young came from Wisconsin to defeat the world’s best modern slingshots and set Top Speed for the breed at 261.78.

Nostalgia Funny Cars ain’t what they used to be just a few short years ago, but there are still a lot of them. More than 30 shooting for 16 spots included Brad Thompson’s swoopy, droopy 1969 Camaro facsimile, which fell in round 2. Photographer Dave Kommel had a clear shot of the front end until the driver’s fiancée, Jana Treur, got in the way, dang it.

The post Cackling Nitro Cars Hit Escondido, Barona, and Bakersfield! appeared first on Hot Rod Network.

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[doedipus]

LP D&D: Grand Magistrate Smith

For this session, Max’s brother Torix was invited to audition for the vacant spot in the party. He plays Zerander, goliath purple dragon knight. His horse is named “Frank.” Torix is a bit of a power gamer, but he doesn’t fall into the trap of expecting everyone to have perfectly min-maxed characters or whatever or going off on us for performing sub-optimally in battle, so it hasn’t really caused any problems of that sort thus far. He’s also the token straight guy, with everyone else but us ostensibly being gay dudes. Aside from the one or two times where he said some pretty crass stuff about trans folk, he’s been pretty solid, though, and we haven’t had any incidents since I stated being open about being trans with the group.

He, Max and I are kind of my current non-tabletop gaming group, though usually he’s playing mount & blade in the background while Max and I play Dark Souls or something. I spent a long time without a decent group after my previous one got fed up with me for being a caustic asshole, but I guess the estrogen has mellowed me out enough that I can socialize with people without chiding them over stupid bullshit fucking constantly.

Also, Escrima’s surname is “Smith,” hence the title.

...Anyway, content under the break

The gang rests up at the estate

Constanza learns everything about Amn

Fear of magic

Kingdom-tier

All nobility is capable of owning land

!!!

Succession is deeds-oriented; not being a cool guy gets your title revoked

Coy attempts to train the displacer beasts

She teaches it to “heel”

Lucas continues to make copies of his spellbook

He realizes that he has become ambidextrous after absorbing Eva

Graham receives a letter from the brothel

Connie has that one dream again

She looks up at her parents

There’s fire everywhere

She’s the one “touched”

Her parents pick her up and run out of the fire

A voice: MOTHER KNOWS

Zerander arrives at the gates of Waterdeep, City of splendors

He’s here on a mission from the leader of his order of knights to assist Rockseeker

His token looks like a dark souls character //Specifically, like some hybrid of Hawkeye Gough and Horace the Hushed

He asks a lady where the market is

“Oh my, you’re quite big”

Huehuehue

As a giant, he attracts stares as he wanders towards the market

Zerander goes looking for an armorer

The shop attendant is predictably taken aback

Armor’s gonna cost extra for size

Zerander sells off his old chainmail to offset the cost

Measuring the giant is the armorer’s greatest trial

We’re gonna need a bigger tape!

Zerander asks the attendant about nearby inns

He is pointed towards the “flying badger”

Hey, the inn’s right next to the market!

The building smells of cooked meat

His stomach rumbles, deafening nearby guests

The innkeeper offers him some roasted phoenix, bleu cheese, and brandy

Innkeeper asks what brought him to town. Being a barmaid, she is fairly pretty, and probably hitting on him

Through mouthfuls of flaming poultry, he explains he’s a bodyguard for Rocky

Innkeeper points him towards the office

He asks about a room

It’s gonna cost extra because he’s gonna need extra beds

He attempts to hit on the innkeeper, but she’s not having it

As he enters the room, he bumps his head on the frame

He drops his gear in the chest in the corner and heads for houseseeker

He’s got his axe and shield still

Zerander searches for houseseeker //Rocky’s house. At some point, I started referring to everything Rocky owns as XXXseeker

He gets lost at first, but finds his way eventually

The 3-INT secretary takes his name down and tells him to wait for Rocky

“Can I make an insight check on the couch?”

The couch bears him no ill will

The building is busy as always

Janice floats down the stairs to bring him to Rocky

Zerander reflexively ducks as he enters the office

Rocky and Zerander attempt to shake hands, but the size differential makes it difficult

Rockseeker tells him about his mission

Also about the party

There’s a paladin

Rocky struggles with pronouns //Graham came out to the party in some semi-cannon RP we did after the session where we crashed Lord Heir’s banquet. Supposedly, he was stealth beforehand, but a couple of NPCs apparently knew what was up as soon as they laid eyes on him, which was weird as hell. I guess that’s what happens when a cis dude GMs trans characters, though

Also a wizard

A bureaucrat

A weirdo

Draggo

WELCOME TO ROCKSEEKER!

Rocky leads Zerander towards the estate

A carriage arrives to take the party to the trial

Graham reads the letter

It’s a news letter from Mister Mister

Hey, there’s a peep show

Ooh, coupons

Rent services for a whole year for 300 gp!!!!!!!!!!!

Graham thinks. Oh no!

He remembers Lucas talking about how Esmeralda is a bad influence

Greg considers going to the trial

Lucas convinces him to come along

Connie asks for something to help her sleep better

Apparently Liza and the spirit of fire are back in town with some cargo

Graham wants to check on his retainers before going to the trial

He has Lucas send to them about the death of Osric

They’re in town already

Escrima has been shouting “mother! Mother!” for the last hour

Jeeves gives him something to subdue him

The carriage is luxury 2.1

It says Rockseeker 2 on the side

The gang heads to dockseeker

Liza went to Baldur’s gate

There’s a pair of airships there

The spirit is wanted in Baldur’s Gate. How weird.

Lucas is worth 15kgp for some reason

Liza is pissed we didn’t tell her much of anything

She returned with a shipment of rubies!

Graham goes to talk with his uncle Cedric

He tells him about the banquet incident

And the bad news about Osric’s death

Cedric is worried about succession

Graham realizes that he hasn’t had contact with the family since

Cedric tells Graham that he should’ve attended the funeral and such

Graham encounters toxic masculinity. How fun!

Verona elected to stay on the island

Lucas tries to apologise to Liza, and she forgives him

Liza “saw things”

The duke of Baldur’s gate is into some shady shit

Gnolls everywhere, walking freely

Not even working as waiters or anything

Escrima comes out of his trance

Mother wants him to take the party to Calimport

A woman was shouting in some strange language

Jeeves tells him he’s been sleeping for like a week

“Are there any garments that I should don?”

Amazingly, Escrima assumes that the trial is more important that seeing Lupe

Escrima gets some nice clothes and a hearty meal before leaving for the courthouse

Escrima gets there before the others, and Merrow is confused

They’re late?

You’re a noble, right?

You can be a judge!

What could possibly go wrong?

You’ll judge him, you’ll convict, and we’ll get to watch an execution!

Escrima does some word association to prepare

The rest of the gang heads for the trial, but there’s heavy traffic

The trial marches on

Heir is accused of high treason

Escrima gasps

A copy of Hier’s letter is passed to the judges

Judges may ask questi-

Escrima starts mumbling nonsense about wolves and mouths and meatbags

That’s a very good point, your honor!

He should seek to be more than just a meatbag

Escrima wonders where Hier learned calligraphy

The judge puts forward that the letter was forged!

Mother tells him that the letter was not a forgery

Escrima tells the crowd that it was not a forgery, and Hier is a TRAITOOOOOOOOOOOOOORRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR

Rocky and Zerander head to the trial

Hey, they get to see a paladin judge a trial. How cool!

Graham’s gonna be a very interesting judge to watch!

Very cool and collected

They hear Escrima shouting

Rockseeker becomes worried

The defense wants to continue with the forgery line

They call out a sister of the night as a defense witness

It’s sister Mary Anne, who was out getting takeout during the battle, I guess

She says that he’s innocent

Mary Anne says that the plot was all the sisters, and Hier was a patsy

Mother says that Escrima should forgive Hier

Hier is declared innocent and released

The gang arrives at the courthouse

It’s quiet. Weird.

Escrima, Merrow, Rocky, and Zerander are the only people there

Graham wonders what happened to the trial

Everyone chews him out

Lucas tells Escrima off

Coy and Lucas try to leave, but Rocky stops them

Rocky introduces Zerander to the party

Lucas takes 3 damage from the handshake

Zerander inexplicably clocks Graham //😒

Lucas asks Rocky about Baldur’s Gate

Rocky knows the sisters are there and that Lucas is wanted there

He worries that Baldur’s Gate will join the sisters

Lucas makes idle threats to Rocky about Greg’s safety

Rocky introduces Connie

PVP occurs, and Zerander completely believes that she’s what they say she is

Rocky can’t find Coy

He introduces Zerander to High Magistrate Escrima

“Your faces... why do they look so long? Have I done something wrong?”

Pls ask us first next time, dear

Watchu Doin’, Coy?

Coy goes looking for Hier

She asks about where he went

She borrows a horse

Hier’s not in the main hall of the inn

The bartender points her upstairs

She thinks she’s stealthed

Coy steals a ring of room keys from a housekeeper

She searches the private rooms

An alchemist opens the first door

“You’re not what I ordered!”

He slams the door in her face

She tries to listen in through another room

But there’s no answer

She unlocks the door, and finds Zerander’s room

There’s a locked chest! Watchu doin’?

Unlocking the chest, apparently

Dude, there’s a dungeoneer’s pack!

Coy leaves the room and locks everything up

Next room!

“Housekeeping!”

A voice answers, but she doesn’t recognize it

It’s a halfling aristocrat guy

“Sorry, wrong room”

“...could it be the right room? I have money!”

There’s a lot of rooms in here

Behind the door, she hears Hier and someone else hyucking it up

Apparently, there was some kind of setup at the trial

Hier’s paying someone 3kgp

Meanwhile, the gang wonders where Coy went

Rocky suggests she might be doing something rash

Lucas asks about fast travelling to Neverwinter

There’s some portals around, but they’re fairly expensive

The gang considers travelling by air

Connie asks Merrow about appointing a stand-in for meetings

Apparently, people do it a lot. Just leave the masks with whomever

Rocky is optimistic about Escrima’s ruling. This is slightly disconcerting

He mentions Mother by name

Lucas glares at Escrima

Escrima hears Lucas staring at him

We’re in a manga now

Jiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii~

Lucas warns Escrima about Mother

Escrima is “Confundled”

Rockseeker gives his condolences to Connie

Coy murders Lord Hier

She draws Suzie, and leaves stealth

She opens the door to the room with Hier and the Lawyer

BANG! The door swings open wildly

The force of the door causes it to bounce off the wall and swing back in her face

She teleports into the room

Coy tells the lawyer to fuck off if he doesn’t want to die

Battle with Lord Hier the Innocent of Waterdeep

Hier draws his own sword and strikes, clipping Coy’s tail

Coy teleports behind Hier

“Nuthin’ personnel, kid...”

Suzie cuts through his body

Blood soaks the room

Hier tries to flee, but Coy teleports in front of him

She quarters him in a flurry of swings

Blood goes everywhere

Lord Hier of Waterdeep is dead

The cleaning lady she stole the keys from sees this and screams

WATCHU DOIN’, COY THEY’RE COMING!

She jumps out a window

Hey Coy, did you know that you’ve just committed a serious crime and will probably be hanged?

Coy jumps around the outside of the tavern

She fumbles a jump in front of the tavern, and lands on her face

Coy runs to the stable. The party is loitering there

Coy demands that Connie disguise her

She cleans the blood off, but that’s the best she could do

Lucas casts invisibility on Coy, who doesn’t stop talking

The gang heads off to the estate

Greg is discussing matters with some nobles

Hey Lucas, how’d the trial go?

Escrima failed us

Greg reminds Lucas that Escrima saved his life several times

Lords Valria and Haliam introduce themselves

They’re talking about organizing a campaign through the southeast

It’s gonna be a month or two before they can start

Greg wants to stay in Waterdeep to oversee the march on Beydale

Coy gives Connie the dagger of breakfast watching //Another magic item. When someone holds it, they see a brief vision of the future. the first couple of times the party used it, the vision included breakfast, hence the name.

She holds it by the blade

There’s a dank corridor

The casters are fighting

Graham charges at a monster

There’s some eggs benedict in the corner

The architecture is distinctly dwarven

Connie grabs the knife

She sees a city surrounded by steam

There’s a hangar being built

Lucas is there, but older

Graham is there, but different

Ooh, an omelette

Gee, that was weird.

A note from Rocky arrives, saying that Hier was murdered, and if they need horses to go looking for him.

No leads on the suspect, somehow

How convenient!

Zerander picks up his armor

Lucas copies spells, and Greg keeps him company

Connie visits the tower of magi

On the way there, the carriage stops in an alley

There’s a person there. She identifies herself as being sister Lake //The cult Connie allegedly belongs to is supposed to basically be the church of scientology. Sister Lake is her auditor.

Lake wants her to return to the monastery

Connie assures her that she’ll be back soon, and will definitely pay her dues

Connie hires a mage with sending to help with the sessions she’ll miss

Connie gives greg the mask, and instructs him to have Mario the sending mage contact her with information

“Aren’t there like, vampires around here or something?”

Lucas messages Rocky about the vampire problem

There’s a letter from Viper

...but Jake had moving stuff to do, so we’ll never know what it said

Escrima talks about how he trained Lupe during the week

She knows to attack gnolls now, which is cool

They could probably ride her now

Let’s go to Casa de Lupe

Zerander hears some screeches from the hangar

Frank freaks out, but Zerander calms him down

Connie tells Escrima to open the bay doors

Zerander sees the wyvern, and pulls out his longsword

“What is that?!?!?!?!”

“We caught her”

Lupe cautiously approaches Zerander

Zerander offers to “fix” Lupe

Oh! You know how to spay a wyvern?

River crossing puzzle! //Idk if it’s come up yet, but being a large party, we tend to have trouble figuring out how to transport people effectively using the items we have. obviously we could just use horses, but this is dungeons and fucking dragons! If we can fly, we’re going to god damn fly!

Lucas on broom //Magic item. It’s a flying broom. Its carry weight is pretty low, so only the lighter characters can really make use of it, but it’s amazing anyway.

Escrima on Lupe

Connie on Broom

Zerander on Lupe

Coy on the fly

Graham on the fly

Lupe launches out of the hangar, and the party takes to the skies with her

END