#i do have “my spot” where i sit on the steps closest to the ocean and stare into the void while drinking an energy drink or something

[kitkatstu-dies]

Back to school inspo ✨📚

[idk6123]

Family Break (Mauvier X Male Reader)

They feel forever since they managed to get a break. Not just a regular break, a big one. With the constant war going on, it felt like they never going to take a break. But with the end of Sombron, everything seems to end up peaceful, with no sign of war or conflict anything soon.

With the recent success, Veyle was the first one to celebrate. Not just with all of her friends and allies, but with just with her closest friends. So with excitement, she went to Mauvier and his husband, Y/N to invite them to a day to the beach. They agreed, but they weren’t the only ones to get invited. Alear and Marni did as well, but since the divine dragon was too busy with their current duties, they declined. Still, Marni luckily accepted.

So with a bright, sunny day, the four people who left the fell dragon’s army arrived at the beach at the desert land known as Solm. In their swimming gear and both grown men carrying everything they need for today; the group are ready for a fun day. They managed to find a good spot, where’s not too busy, but there are still enjoying the tropical weather.

“Wow! Just look at it!” Veyle looks beyond excitement when she spots the sea. “I can’t wait to get in.”

“I don’t see why you couldn’t.” Marni looks back at Mauvier and Y/N with a smirk. “Any chance you enjoy unpacking our stuff?”

“What? No, we can’t do that!” Veyle responds.

“It’s alright. If you want to swim right now, go ahead Lady Veyle.” Mauvier reassures. “Let Y/N and I set up our belongings.”

“Are you sure?” Veyle asks, not wanting her friends to be left out.

“Yes.” Y/N responds. “It’s only take a couple minutes. Compared what we’ve been through, it’s nothing.”

Veyle still looks unsure. This time, it’s Marni that tries to convince her. “C’mon Lady Veyle. They’re up to this. We can swim together later if you really want to.”

“I guess that’s true.” A smile creeps on the fell child’s face. “Alright, let’s go.”

“That’s what I’m talking about!” Marni looks quiet excited. “Reach ya there!” Without a warning, the armor knight runs towards the ocean.

Veyle looks a bit startled. “What!? Hey, wait for me!” Soon enough, she runs after he friend.

Mauvier and Y/N both smile at the scene as the two girls begin to have a water fight at the beach.

“Never would I imagine they would be friends, but I’m glad they are.” Y/N comments.

“Both of them changed a lot when I first met them.” Mauvier adds. “I suppose the same could be said of us.”

Y/N smiles at his husband. “I agree. Honestly, I was scared when we betrayed the Hounds. And I wished Griss survived. Even part of me wished Zephia did so too. But I’m happy we did.”

Mauvier smiles back. “I wish we could talk more, but we shouldn’t postpone our duties.”

“Right! Let’s unpack!”

The two begin to unpack the bags they brought. Beach blankets, folding chairs, food and cold drinks. Even a parasol, which they putted on. They also have some extra items they brought, such as extra swimsuits, a beach ball and sunscreen.

After packing, Mauvier offered Y/N sunscreen. So he sits behind him to put the lotion on his back. “Ugh, I can feel my skin burning already.”

“At least we’re under a parasol.”

“I feel like that isn’t enough.” Y/N let out a groan. “Maybe we should’ve gone to Fyrene instead?”

Mauvier smiles. “Don’t worry. I putted enough on you, so don’t worry about burn wounds. Speaking of which…” Mauvier stands up and takes a couple of steps forward. “Lady Veyle! Marni! You need to put some sunscreen!”

Veyle and Marni snaps their heads back at them. “We’re coming!” Veyle yells.

Both girls quickly run out of the water to get back at their friends. Once arrived, Veyle and Marni put on the sunscreen. After they’re done, Y/N put on some on the remaining parts of his body. Afterwards, he helps his husband by putting in on his back, returning the favor.

“God, why is it so hot here?” Marni soon complains. “How could anyone live here?”

“I can.” Veyle says with a chirpy voice. “It would be so fun living at the beach. I can just go swimming anything I want. But I suppose that’s true with the Somniel.”

“I hope you’re kidding. That just sounds of everyday sunstrokes.” Although sounding negative, Marni seems to enjoy the small banter. “Speaking of which, I could use some ice cream. Mauvier.”

“You can’t just order him around.” Veyle puts her foot down before Mauvier even had a chance to.

“Why not? I’m sure he’s fine with it.”

“While that is true, I prefer if you could ask it kindlier.” Mauvier says.

“Yeah, yeah.” Marni merely ignores his request. “I’m sure the rest want some too. I heard there are some spicy ones.”

This intrigues Veyle instantly. “There are?”

“Yes. Heard they put some kind of Solmic pepper in it.” Marni explains.

Y/N raises his eyebrow. “Shouldn’t be the first place of ice cream to cool you off? Not making it spicier?”

“I dunno. But it exists. So Veyle, do you want it?”

Veyle looks somewhat guilty, which Mauvier noticed. “No need to be distressed. If you want it, I get it for you.”

“Are you sure?” Veyle asks worriedly.

“I’m sure.” Mauvier smiles. He looks back at Y/N. “I get some of you too.” He stands up.

“You’re a sweetheart.” Y/N complements him.

After a peck on the lips, Mauvier stands up and begin walking around for a stall. About a minute later, after getting pass multiple beach enjoyers, he found a stall, with a man standing behind it.

“Welcome! Anything you want to order?”

“Yes. I want to order some ice creams. Let’s see… one vanilla ice cream cone. One with chocolate and strawberry. And I heard there is one that is spicy…”

“Ah yes, the Hot and Cold Solmic Delicacy. Funny, isn’t it? Never would I thought someone would order these, but it certainly captured an audience.” The man behind the stand comments. “Anyhow, four ice creams, coming up.”

Mauvier can’t help but look back at the sea. To his surprise, he can’t see Y/N, Veyle and Marni from where he’s standing. In the background, the shop keeper is making the ice cream. He notices Mauvier where is looking at.

“Got a fun day?”

“Oh, yes.” Mauvier looks back. “It’s been a while when we could relax.”

“Gotcha. I feel the same. Ever since the Fell Dragon is gone, I sensed everyone else feeling the same way. Speaking of which, I should do something with my family too. It’s been a while since I gone out with my wife and kids.”

“Family…?” Mauvier doesn’t get at first what he meant, until he realizes that he thinks Veyle and Marni are his and Y/N’s children.

“And it’s done. Because you’re with your family, I charge you less. 15 gold please.”

“Ah, yes. Thank you very much.” Mauvier hands over the coins to him

The store clerk hands over the ice cream cone, as well some tissues. “Have a great day, sir.”

“Thank you. You too.”

While Mauvier walks back to the group, he keeps pondering about what the shop keeper said. Y/N is his husband, so it would make sense that they would be family. But Veyle and Marni? Sure, he cares about them a lot. But to the point that they’re family? That he isn’t sure about. He doesn’t disagree with the statement, but merely wondering about it. They were some kind of family back when they were the hounds, but that was different.

Mauvier arrives back with the four ice creams that starts to melt. With a wide smile, Marni is quick to snatch the chocolate one. “Thanks Mauvier!”

Mauvier hands over the spicy one to Veyle. “Thank you so much.”

“You’re welcome.” Mauvier sits down next to Y/N again. “Which one do you want?”

“Uhh… Vanila, just because it’s a classic.”

And so, the four enjoys their cold beverage, all the while chatting like normal people and looking at the beautiful sea. It feels like minutes pass. Everybody ate their ice cream and chatted for minutes to no end.

“I want to go swimming again. Veyle, Mauvier, Y/N, you’re up to it?”

“Always.” Veyle says with a smile. She and Marni stand up. Both of them look back at the couple. “You’re coming?”

“In a minute. There is something I want to discuss with Y/N.” Mauvier replies.

Marni pffts. “Really? You’re on the beach and you’re still stuck upped with your duties? Well, whatever. At least we’re having fun.” With wide smiles, the two sprints back to the sea.

Y/N looks back at his husband, who look deep in thought. “Is there something wrong?”

“No, everything is alright. I’m just lost in thought.”

“All alone?”

Mauvier chuckles. “Just hearing you adding that, I can tell you spend enough time with emblem Corrin.”

“True.” Y/N chuckles. “But enough joking. What’s up?”

“Well, when I was getting ice cream, the store venter mistook us as a family. As in two fathers and their children. And I can’t stop thinking about it. We were some kind of a family back when we were the hounds. But… I don’t know. I view you as family, and I care a great deal for Veyle and Marni, but I’m not sure I would call them a family.”

“So that’s what you’re thinking about.” Y/N comments. “If you want to know my opinion, I view us as some kind of… friend group, I guess? I mean, obviously I view you as my husband. But lady Veyle and Marni are more like little sisters to me rather than children.”

Mauvier let out a quiet hum. “I guess I view them sooner as siblings rather than children as well. Though… I do like the sound of a family.”

“Oh, but we’re a family. We’ve been through so much, it’s not hard to think differently of each other.”

“I meant; I like the idea of having a family. You, me, a son or daughter. Or even multiple children.” Mauvier then realizes the current situation and quickly backs down. “My apologies. I shouldn’t talk something like that when we’re having a trip.”

“No! It’s alright.” Y/N reassures. “I… think it’s a good idea to think about the future, now that we defeated the Fell Dragon.”

“You do?” Mauvier can’t help but smile.

“Yes. Maybe we should think about a place to settle down? With our efforts with the war, I doubt we can’t afford a nice place. Maybe somewhere in Fyrene, or Brodia?”

“That sounds nice. Of course, I want to live near Lady Veyle to continue my duties. But besides that, I’m open to live anywhere.” Mauvier comments.

“Sounds good to me.” Y/N nods. “Once we get a house, that’s when we get children. Since making them is out of the question, as much I love to try.” Mauvier chuckles. “Maybe we should adopt one?”

“That sounds wonderful. I know the experience of being an orphan, as does Marni. And we ended up on a path that most people disagree on, even when we stepped off it. I want to prevent that to happen to any child, with you by my side.”

[adelha-mathilde]

Dancing With Demons (Obey Me!) fic

content: established relationships, casual fluff stuff, romance too

The past few weeks had been spent in preparation for this formal ball in the Demon Lord's Castle. An official welcome to several of the new Fae residence in the Devildom and new students of Fae lineage at RAD. The Avatars of Sin in attendance as well as their pact human. While Solomon and Thirteen were doing their best to remain in the shadows and avoid attention. Simeon and Luke sitting at the same table as Diavolo and Adelha as Barbatos watched the room. Things were going rather well as Adelha acted as overseer to any Fae that approached to speak with Diavolo. While Adelha's own family clan of Fae mingled with the demons and vampires. Adelha had spotted her cousin Verne already making strides in befriending Asmodeus over playful banter. While Adelha's clan leader and adopted guardian spoke at length with Lucifer. Eugene Currier taking a moment to turn his gaze to Adelha and give her his best smile. Which she returned with the same abiding love before Luke asked Adelha another question.

The formal ball was going splendidly for Adelha to finally be asked to dance. Her gaze going up to Barbatos to gladly place her gloved hand in his own. Her seat soon taken by her closest family member and teacher, Claude Gaugain. His muscular frame easing into the chair to have him speak with Simeon on his latest book he was writing. So Adelha walked with Barbatos onto the dance floor with little worries to be swept away into the next song the band began to play. Barbatos leading with perfect steps for Adelha to follow as the demon spoke, "To think that I would get the first dance with you tonight. I am so glad to have such an honor, Margaret." The Dragon maiden chuckled to let Barbatos all but float them across the dance floor. Her smile warm and inviting. "Please. The honor is mine to have you all to myself, Barbatos. If only for now. I know dealing with the fiasco in the kitchen last week had to be stressful." Barbatos gave a sigh to flinch ever so slightly. "To think the whole order I placed was ruined by some accidental mix up of where the crates were placed. I'd think someone sabotaged the delivery for some reason." Adelha huffed to let Barbatos give her a twirl. Her voice even and sweet. "I would say that is exactly what occurred. The Fae do so love their games and tricks to savor pranks and mischief. Hence why I offered to help replace the delivery. In case a Fae really had decided to pull something."

Barbatos visibly considered such to smile as he hummed in thought. "I see. Here I was under the impression the House of Lords might have been involved as well. Or we might assume they were in cahoots with some of the Fae. The possibilities all but beg for an investigation. But that may come later. Let us simply be grateful that everything worked out." Adelha nodded to then give a laugh when Barbatos swept her right off her feet for the next twirl. The two dancing all through the next two songs before Lucifer stepped in. So Barbatos bowed out to let Adelha and Lucifer have the next dance. The butler instead sweeping Adelha's cousin Alma into a dance as Diavolo did the same for Alma's twin sister Agrias. Lucifer took Adelha by the hands to bring her into his embrace. His wings giving a shiver as he hummed in pure contentment. "Ah. The fragrant scent of lavender and the ocean depths. Perfect for a sea dragon that loves to garden. I must say I am quite fond of such, Margaret." Adelha blushed to huff a laugh. "Hence why you've moved a pot of lavender flowers into the House of Lamentation right next to your room. Not very subtle, Luce. But I am glad you decided to sweep me away for a dance. I wanted to make sure you healed after that fight with the rather rude Fae who attacked you."

Lucifer gave a half smirk to sweep Adelha around and chuckle at her. "My my. I can assure you that I am completely fine. Three iron dwarves and two fire djinn are little trouble for me to handle. So why would you think to worry, Margaret?" Adelha makes the point by tracing her hand at Lucifer's shoulder down to his side to give it a rather hard pinch. Which has Lucifer visibly wince to growl out in pain as he turns them so no one might see. Making Adelha huff out and wash healing magic over the hidden damage as she lightly scolds him. "The fact that you are faintly scented of burned flesh and pain was a dead give away. Add in your breath kept hitching and your heart rate is elevated equals to you still being hurt from what those five fools did." Lucifer glares at Adelha to give a low growl from deep in his chest. Bringing her all the closer to whisper in her ear. "Bold little dragon. I will pay you back for that, Margaret Joanna Adelha Mathilde. Mark my words. You are dancing with danger far too casually."

Adelha openly laughs with both warmth and evident amusement as the two of them move about the dance floor with the others. "So he says in a formal ball full of demons and Fae and powerful sorcerers and other deadly folk. And they say you don't have a sense of humor, Lucifer." Lucifer raises an eyebrow to then chuckle at the given implications. Asmodeus and Verne soon moving by them to smile at them as Lucifer gives Adelha a twirl. His words hinting at concern for him to whisper, "Tell me. On a scale of one to ten. How worried should I be that Asmodeus doesn't come home tonight?' Adelha grins to watch as Asmodeus and Verne openly flaunt their moves on the dance floor for Adelha to answer. "Oh my dear beloved Lucifer. The better question is when Asmodeus will make it back from his honeymoon with the vixen to declare she's moving in with you." Lucifer looks stricken at the implication. Then he heaves a hard sigh of air that all but has him deflate. So Adelha leans in to place a chaste kiss to his lips. Her words molten and sweet. "I jest. But Asmodeus is not coming home tonight. Verne will most likely kidnap him for the week. For both of them to have way too much fun and make many good memories."

[mayraki]

“enemies?” - jj maybank

-> sebastianstahn’s gif!

summary: it was clear that their smiliar strong attitudes didn’t fit together, or at least that’s what they thought until someone hurts her and he doesn’t even hesitate on protecting her.

inspired by this post by @whumpster-dumpster and all those reblogs!

warning: jj and y/n being mean. violence, fights, and cursing

masterlist

“Asshole.”

“Idiot.”

“Dumbass.”

“Stupid.”

JJ and you were throwing insults at each other after a silly fight you two had. All the Pogues thought it was silly after all, but it wasn’t for you and JJ. Everything that one did was annoying for the other, and it would just transform into a fight or just rolling eyes annoyed at the other’s actions. It didn’t matter that at the morning you two were laughing with the Pogues after a fun morning riding the waves, it would always end up with you two screaming at each other and ruining the moment for everyone.

It was a normal morning with you and the Pogues riding the waves like always. You were sitting on your surfing board looking at Kie with a smile while she was riding the wave like a fucking pro. You clapped screaming in excitement when she swam closer to you. “That’s what’s up dude!” You yelled and Kie let out a laugh.

“I want to see the real pro ride the wave now.” She answered and you smiled. Without giving Kie an answer you paddled with your hands more deeper into the ocean and waited for the perfect wave. You could feel your heart beating a little bit faster than usual. You loved those excited nerves you always had before riding a wave. You loved it so much that you couldn’t even wait for the next one, even if you were having currently one.

You saw from a far a wave that was big enough for you to ride. So without hesitating, you paddled towards it and prepared your body to ride it like there was no tomorrow. You took the opportunity to stand on your surfing board as the wave was getting closer and closer, to the point that it was already in front of you, waiting for you to ride it.

Your feet were ready to feel the wave and your body to move along with it, but instead, someone quickly moving in front of you caught you off guard, making you lose your balance and fall into the water, almost hitting your head with your board in the process.

You swam to the surface to see who was the person who stole your wave, ready to go off on their face, and the one you saw didn’t surprised you at all.

Once your feet touched the sand you dropped your board and turned around, waiting for the boy to get out of the water. Kie, who saw what just happened was now walking towards you.

“Hey, dude, let it go.” She said seeing your expression. She knew that exact face you were making, that anger in your eyes and your impatient foot going up and down. Kie knew what was coming, just like it went every day.

“Fuck that.” You said once you saw the dumb blonde boy you had so much anger in your body for walk towards where you and Kie where. “He stole my wave when I was already riding it, everyone knows you don’t do that here. He’s going to hear what I have to say.” Your firm tone made Kie understand that you weren’t going to let it go. But before she could say anything else, the blonde boy was already close enough to hear your words. “Was that funny to you?”

JJ, who was now shaking his wet hair looked at you confused and then looked back, checking if you were talking to him. “Do you see me laughing?”

“You stole my fucking wave.” You took a step forward to be more closer to JJ, who let out a grin once he looked down and nodded.

“Oh, right. That was pretty funny.”

“Wow.” You let out a fake laugh. “You love so much being the troublemaker, don’t you? The attention you seek is so sad. I feel sorry for you.”

“Why don’t you move along and leave me the fuck alone, Kook?” He said in a mocking tone since he knew you hated being called that.

At this point, you were so close to him that you could see the grin on his face more clearer now. “You’re a fucking asshole, you know that?”

He nodded looking at you straight in the eyes. “Takes one to know one.” He said getting closer to your face. You had the sudden urge to push him but before you could do something, you felt Kie grabbing your arm and pulling you away from JJ.

“What’s going on?” Pope asked appearing from the waves.

“What do you think it’s going on?” John B asked behind him. “Probably JJ and Y/n going at each other again, like always.”

And John B was right; ‘like always.’

It happened so often that everyone just rolled their eyes and continued with their days while you and him were throwing mean words at each other. It was so common that if it didn’t happen, it felt like something was missing from the day. But it wasn’t like you two hated each other... well, maybe it was. But it was more the fact that you two had too firm attitudes, so similar, that when they met each other they didn’t fit well. And until this day, nothing changed.

“Would you just shut up?” He said annoyed at you while you were talking to Kie, on that other morning at the Chateau.

You turned to him with a disgust expression. “Why would I do what you want? Asshole.” You rolled your eyes before turning to Kie, who just sighed knowing what was about to come.

“We were having a fun conversation until you spoke.” JJ shrugged his shoulders with a little proud smirk.

“About what? The girl that you took to your bed the other night? Yeah, real interesting and new.” You said sarcastically.

“That’s what you need. To get a good laid.” JJ pointed at you. “Too bad your perfect Kook boyfriend can’t give you that.” You felt your heart dropped to you stomach once you heard his words. Kie quickly got up from the chair right after you did, trying to ignore that pain you were feeling in your chest.

“Guys-” Pope said before getting up from the chair and walking between you and JJ. “Stop it. Really, it’s getting very tiring listening to you guys.”

“Blame JJ, he fucking started it.”

“You were the one who talked with your annoying voice, it’s not my fault my ears can’t take it.”

“You’re the annoying one.” You felt your heart beating faster than usual. You didn’t want to let JJ know that his words were starting to hurt you, you couldn’t let that happen. “Just because you aren’t happy here doesn’t mean that you get to take it out on other people!”

“Y/n...” Kie said noticing the hurt in your voice.

“Why don’t you just go back to your perfect huge fucking mansion with your perfect arrogant boyfriend and leave us the fuck alone!”

“Shut the fuck up!” You yelled like you never yelled before. After flipping your middle finger at JJ, you walked out of the Chateau followed by Kie who shook her head to JJ seconds later.

Pope turned to him before letting out a big sigh. “What?” JJ asked confused after watching his best friend’s face.

“Sometimes you’re just too blind and stupid.”

“What did I do?!” JJ asked now turning to John B who was at the kitchen shaking his head.

“Didn’t you hear?” He asked but JJ quickly shook his head. “Her mom moved out a week ago.” John B said softly. “And Rafe broke up with her a week later, because he believes she isn’t a ‘kook material’ anymore. Sarah told me.”

“Too bad.” JJ shrugged his shoulders pretending to not care. He didn’t want to show a soft spot for you and keep his annoyed expression, but this time something clicked inside of him and that strong attitude he had for you somehow didn’t appear on that moment. “She still has a lot. Things that we could only imagine.” He sat down on the couch, leaving his feet on top of the coffee table with the intention to lose himself on his phone and ignore what was going on with him, but then Pope asked softly: “Does she?”

JJ couldn’t seem to stop asking himself that question. She did. He was repeating himself that on and on. He always thought you did, you were a kook, of course you did. After that moment, he didn’t see you at all. Not even with Kie when she came back to the Chateau, or when they were all going to the Wreck to have their normal Friday free dinner that Kie’s dad would often give them.

“Kegger tonight?” John B asked wrapping his arms around Sarah.

“Fuck yeah, bro.” JJ said. He was ready to walk away from the Wreck when Pope asked behind him.

“Is Y/n ok?” He asked Kie. For some reason, JJ didn’t want to hear that conversation, so he turned around to see what John B and Sarah were doing, maybe join their conversation, but then he saw John B’s tongue going down Sarah’s throat, he thought that he didn’t have anything to add to that, so instead, he left his hands inside his pockets and looked down hoping for his ears to focus on something else. But Kie’s voice was louder than everything, or at least JJ thought of that excuse.

“I don’t know man.” Kie said. “I haven’t seen her since she left the Chateau this morning. I tried sneaking into her room but she isn’t answering.”

“Have you tried calling or texting her?”

“Pope, we don’t live in the 80’s, of course I tried that. But no luck. Hopefully she heard about the Kegger tonight, she doesn’t like to miss a party.”

“Yeah, she doesn’t. But we’re talking about a breakup- I’m not saying that I’m not happy they broke up, but, you know, can’t be easy for her.”

“I know, Pope, I know. But for now, all we can hope is that she shows up at the party, and if she doesn’t, I’ll try calling her again.”

“Sounds good.”

“Are we ready to leave or what?” John B asked clapping excited and everyone followed him to his van.

The way to the Kegger, JJ kept thinking Kie’s conversation with Pope. It was true that you and him weren’t the closest friends, not even friends most of the time, but he knew that you weren’t the type to close yourself up like that. Maybe with Pope, or John B, but Kie? That definitely wasn’t good news.

Why do you care so much now JJ? He suddenly asked to himself in his head. And the truth was, he had no fucking clue. He snapped himself out of his thoughts and on that moment noticed the music getting clearer and clearer as the van was moving.

He immediately saw teenagers dancing and drinking on the beach the moment he stepped out of the van once they arrived. It was a normal Kegger party, just like the ones before. So, like every other party, once JJ noticed where the keg was, his feet were already carrying him towards it.

“Is that Y/n?” Kie asked when JJ had his beer in hand. He turned around looking for you expecting to be hard since the beach was full, but he was horribly mistaken, it was the easiest thing.

You were dancing while you were sitting down on someone’s shoulders. Your arms were up in the air and you eyes were closed while singing the song with your entire heart. You were clearly drunk, that wasn’t something difficult to figure it out.

“I think so.” Pope said trying to see you in the dark of the night, but Kie let out a tiny smile and then nodded.

“Oh, it’s definitely Y/n.”

JJ took a sip from his beer without taking his eyes away from you. He has never seen you this drunk, even though you did like to party and have a good time. But like that... on top of some random guy shoulders, he definitely never saw you like that. Maybe the breakup with Rafe did hit you hard. “Maybe you should get her out of there.” He said not really knowing he did. He didn’t look at Kie but she definitely did look at him. She looked at him strangely, confused on why he was worrying for you or even giving a fuck about the situation at all.

“Why? She’s having fun.” This time, JJ did turned to lock eyes with Kie and noticed she had an eyebrow raised. “Why do you care?” She asked but before he could give an answer, she let out a tiny laugh and the left, to join you in the dance floor. JJ didn’t move, he kept there in his place drinking his beer not really knowing what to do with that strange feeling he was having on his stomach.

Meanwhile, the moment your feet touched the sand the same guy that had you in his shoulders wasted no time and grabbed your waist to pull you closer and enjoy the song that was playing together. You weren’t usually the type to dance with guys like this, or at least, you didn’t for a long time because you were in a relationship for as long as you can remember. This was all new for you and you wanted to be honest with yourself, you were liking it. Since the news of your breakup with Rafe started surfing around Outer Banks, specially in the Kook territory, you started to get more attention from boys. At first, that was the last thing you wanted, it still was, but the amount of alcohol you had in your system and the party itself was making you enjoy all the attention you were receiving. Your drunk self was starting to love it, maybe more than you would like.

“Having fun?” The guy asked in your ear softly. You turned around with your eyes still closed to face him with your back and get him even more closer while his hands were still glued to your waist. You nodded biting your lower lip. You opened your eyes to see with blurry eyes your friend Kie talking to some girl and you let out a tiny smile. You wondered with your eyes around the beach to see the other teenagers having fun at the party just like you, expect one. When you locked eyes with the blonde boy you were familiar with your heart skipped a beat. He had his hand inside his pocket while his other was holding his beer, but what surprised you the most was the fact that he was staring you dead in the eyes, not looking away for even a simple second.

“I’m going to have another beer.” You said without breaking the eye contact with JJ. You didn’t know what was controlling your body, or your mind to that point, but you kept staring at him waiting for him to back down and look away, and when he didn’t, you liked it even more. You grinned as you were walking towards the keg that was lonely at the corner of the beach. From the corner of your eye you noticed JJ walking towards you. A little smile escaped your lips but you covered it perfectly by taking the new cup you had in your hands towards your mouth, to take a sip of the cold beer.

“JJ!” You said once you felt him close enough to you. “Are you looking for a girl to fuck and then leave her the next morning?”

“I could ask you the same question.” He said softly and you turned to him with a grin.

“Well, there’s a lot of pretty girls here. But I’m not an asshole like you,” you paused for a second, locking eyes with him after looking around. “I would definitely call her the next morning.”

He looked up and down at you and then shook his head. “Maybe you should stop drinking.”

“Why do you care?” You spited out. “Leave me the fuck alone.”

“I don’t care,” he shook his head quickly and then added: “I just care that you’re acting like a fucking slut and I don’t want to associate with someone like that.”

You felt your heart dropping to your stomach since you’ve never heard him call you that, or anyone. It wasn’t like JJ to say things of the sort. But the alcohol you had in your system controlled your emotions and ate all of them. Your feet started to move towards him, making him take a step back.

“I should say the same thing to you. I should say that every fucking party, JJ. Going around with tourons like there’s no tomorrow. Kissing almost every girl. You don’t get to call me anything.”

“Rafe broke up with you days ago and you’re already acting like this? Can’t imagine what you’d do a week from now?” He let out a tiny laugh but you didn’t respond to his words immediately. It took you by surprise because you haven’t told him anything about the matter. It was true, rumors fly faster than birds around Outer Banks, but you didn’t expect the Pogues to know since it was all Kook news.

“How do you know?” You asked softly but firmly at the same time.

“Doesn’t matter.”

“Yes it does.” You insisted. “Did Kie told you?”

“No.” You felt a tear fighting to come out of your eye but you stopped it by swallowing and eating your strong feeling in your body.

“Fuck you.” You said almost in a whisper with anger. It didn’t matter that the music was loud and that your tone wasn’t much, your distance to him was enough.

“Fuck me?” He said looking down at your lips and then back at your eyes, letting out a tiny fake laugh in the process. “Well, it seems like you want to.”

It didn’t matter to you that you were closer to him than you’ve ever been, you took another step closer and immediately felt his breathing mixing with yours. “If I wanted to fuck you,” you said firmly “I would’ve done it by now.”

Without waiting for an answer, you walked out leaving JJ with his head full of thoughts. Your heart couldn’t stop beating faster than ever, your head started to hurt thinking of your recent fight with JJ and your eyes were getting blurrier that before. Something about that fight seemed different than the ones you had before with him. You didn’t know what it was, and you didn’t want to stay to find out why. So that’s when you decided to call it a night and leave the party to forget everything about the night.

But JJ didn’t have the same plan.

When you said those last words his heart dropped to his stomach. His heart felt like a dagger had stabbed him and then was left there to hurt him until his last day. As soon as he lost you in the crowd he quickly walked to the Chateau and closed the door with strength. His heavy and quick breathing were back. He hold the side of his head and closed his eyes to try and call himself down. The imagine of you came to his head as he was hearing your words on and on. He felt like the air was running out around him, so he walked over to the window and cracked it open so fast that he almost broke it.

The moment he calmed down, he layed down in the bed hoping to fall asleep. He was so used to having moments like that that he didn’t thought much into it. But the moment he closed his eyes again the image of you appeared again in those black wholes. He sighed, already knowing that was going to be a long night.

“Has anyone seen Y/n?” That was the first thing JJ heard the first time he felt himself falling asleep. He opened his eyes and noticed the bright light of the day peeping through the window.

“No, why?” Pope asked on the living room of the Chateau.

“Because she disappeared after last night and she hasn’t come home.” Kie said and JJ noticed her heavy breathing. “Her parents are looking for her everywhere.”

JJ got up from his bed and opened the door quickly to walk towards everyone, but no one looked at him.

“Oh my god, where could she be?” Sarah asked, appearing from behind of John B.

“I don’t know! I’m kinda freaking out here!” Kie covered her face and let out a big breath, trying to take her heart beating back to normal.

“I don’t want to say this,” Pope said “but have you talked to Rafe?”

“No! That’s a good idea. I’ll talk to him. John B and Sarah,” Kie started pointing “go to the Wreck, Pope go to her house to see if she came back. JJ, check the beach.”

“Why do I have to go?” JJ asked with his sleepy voice.

“Fucking shut up! Go!” Kie yelled having non of JJ’s attitude.

Just like Kie told everyone, the whole group left the Chateau immediately. Expect for JJ. He came back to where his shirt was and put it on with a question on his mind: ‘what if what he had said to you was the thing that made you do something terrible?’

JJ knew you weren’t the type to take his insults personally, even though they were. Both of you knew that. It was just child play sometimes. If one said something hurtful, hours later you two just forgot about and carried on to the next fight. But last night, that was something different. JJ never called you that, not even jokingly, and he didn’t even know why he did it. It was one of those moments that you just say things you don’t really mean and regret it later.

As the walk to the beach was ending, JJ found himself hoping that you were there, safe and sound. Even if he didn’t like you sometimes, just like you, he would never wish anything bad happening to you. So the fact that nobody could find you was making his stomach turn a couple of times when the thought of something really bad happening to you might be a reality.

Once his feet touched the sand, he tried his hardest to locate you in the crowd of people that was at the beach that morning. He took a couple of steps closer to the water when his eyes were now going around the ocean, hoping to see your face riding the waves. But you weren’t there.

“Fuck.” He said in a whisper to himself. Just as he was losing hope on that side of the beach and started to walk away, he recognised your hair as you were sitting down letting your feet touch the water of the ocean. The feeling of relief touched his chest so he walked over to you.

The moment he could see your face more clearer he noticed your puffy eyes from crying and that you were wearing the same clothes as yesterday at the party. A sudden feeling of guilt appeared on his stomach and chest, he knew what he had to do. But he wasn’t happily waiting for it.

“Everyone is looking for you.” He said but you didn’t turned around to face him.

“Well, you found me. You can fuck off now.”

“Stop being such a brat.” He said used to the fighting between you two, even if fighting was the last thing he wanted to do right now.

“If you don’t like it, you can go.” Without hearing you, he sat down next to you. “You’re still here.” You said annoyed.

“Don’t make this harder than it already is. I think I’m going to hate myself for saying this,” you turned to him confused but JJ wasn’t looking at you, he was staring down at the sand next to his feet. “but I want to say that I’m sorry for calling you a slut. I shouldn’t have.”

You rolled your eyes and let out a tiny laugh. Even if you did believed his apology, you weren’t going to forgive him that easily. “Stop the act, JJ, you don’t care about how I feel. You never did.”

“That’s true, I don’t.” He quickly responded. You rolled your eyes once again and went back to staring at the ocean. But JJ didn’t. For some reason the sound of the ocean covered the people talking around them and that was the only thing JJ could hear. He kept staring at you and took the opportunity to see some things he never saw before. Those long eyelashes you had were slightly moving because of the wind blowing. Even if your body gave off anger and annoyance, your eyes were saying something completely different. They looked sad and disappointed. Something that JJ understood. You two did have different lives, different stories, but somehow you two ended up feeling similar things, pain, hate, sadness...

Maybe you two had more in common that you and JJ thought.

“Stop fucking staring at me or I’ll kill you.” Your words made JJ snap out of his thoughts.

“Bet, I’ll be waiting.”

You rolled your eyes. “Fuck off.”

“Happily.” JJ said with a firm tone while getting up and walking back to the road.

You two couldn’t help it. Somehow, no matter the circumstances, fighting was always going to happen with you two. It’s like when something horribly happened, fighting with each other released some type of emotion that made each other feel... safe. As strange as that sounded, it was true. Because no matter what was happening, no matter the day, the hour, the other one was there. Throwing words, fighting, being mean, but that didn’t matter, it was there. And that was what you and JJ wanted, something to be there and don’t change.

Lost in his thoughts, JJ didn’t realise that he was already far gone from the beach and that he was closer to the Chateau. The trees that were around him made the scenario more darker, even if it was the middle of the day and the sun was shining. Some voices were getting louder and louder as he was walking. After a couple of seconds, he recognised the voice immediately.

Rafe.

“What is going on?” He asked once he got closer to the group of people that was between the trees. He noticed Kie looking with anger at Rafe, you next to him trying to calm Kie down and Rafe, with a grin on his face once he saw JJ walking towards them.

“Oh, the Pogue is here.” Rafe said. “Great! The party is full.”

“Fucking idiot.” Kie said shaking her head.

“This isn’t your territory, Kook.” JJ said getting closer to Rafe to intimidate him.

“And who are you to tell me where I can be and where I can’t?”

“Guys, stop it.” You said when you saw JJ and Rafe were very close to each other, with so much anger and arrogance in each eye.

“Hold on, hold on, we’re just having fun here.” Rafe lifted his hands and then let out a tiny fake laugh.

“Yeah, so much fun.” JJ said sarcastically. “Leave our side of the island.” His jawline was now clenched and you noticed how his hands were now closed, making his knuckles more paler than they were.

“And what if I don’t?”

“Rafe, don’t.” You said firmly.

“What’s that Y/n?” Rafe said with a grin looking at you. “Should I give this Pogue a lesson?”

You looked at JJ and immediately realized that there was no out of it. This wasn’t going to end well. Your brain started to look for ways to get out, but non of them had a good ending. Calming the boys down wasn’t an option, this wasn’t a movie that with just looking at someone in the eye was going to cut it. This was real life, and sometimes, you have to do what you have to do to protect them, even if that meant hurting them in the process.

You noticed that JJ was getting closer to Rafe, but without hesitating, you quickly got in front of Rafe, making immediately eye contact with JJ. “Why don’t you just go home, JJ.” You said firmly trying to ignore the pain your chest was feeling.

“Y/n...” Kie said surprised.

You knew about JJ’s home life. You knew about his dad and the things that he did to him. But you never talked about it. JJ didn’t want to, in the first place. So that’s what you all decided when you first found out. But you knew, you knew that was going to get him angry at you and not Rafe, that was going to get him out of that situation and get off, just like you wanted.

“What’s that sweetheart?” Rafe asked getting next to you.

“Go home, JJ.” You said almost in a whisper this time. The pain and anger in his eyes made your chest hurt like a dagger had stabbed you multiple times. You wanted this to be over. Now.

“If that’s what you want.” He said, trying to fight the tears in.

“It is.” You said once you felt Rafe’s arm go around your shoulders. JJ did a little nod and then walked away, with his heart on his stomach, just like you.

“Y/n?” Kie asked softly looking at you.

You looked at her with a warm smile, trying your hardest for it to look real. “I’m safe, Kie. It’s done... don’t worry.”

“Yeah, Kie,” Rafe said looking at you with a smile. “don’t worry. She’s fine with me.”

Just like that, Kie left you and Rafe alone. That wasn’t the way that you expected this to end, but the the best ending came out of it, JJ is safe. And for some reason, that’s all that mattered to you right now.

Just like every other night where something was wrong, there was only way the Pogues wanted to fix it: a Kegger. So, with a new keg and music as louder as it can get, the group got a few Pogues and Turouns to start a party.

JJ found himself with a girl on his lap touching him on ways a lot of girls wanted to at that party. He felt the girl’s fingers going through his hair as her lips were getting closer and closer to his lips.

“Why don’t we go so somewhere more quieter?” The blonde girl asked softly against his lips with a smile.

“Maybe we will.” JJ answer, with a grin even though having a girl around wasn’t in the list of things he wanted to do on that moment. He found himself thinking of you multiple times since he left you with Rafe. What he was feeling was a mix of worry and anger, things that he was used to feeling but not because of you. He usually felt annoyed and irritated, so the fact that his feelings did a full turn was totally consuming his brain.

“What are the Kooks doing here?” He heard Kie asked behind him while the blonde girl, that JJ couldn’t seem to remember her name, was playfully touching with his hair.

He slightly turned around to find teenagers with light brown shorts and polo shirts, with their usual arrogant grins and stupid haircuts.

“This isn’t going to end well.” Pope shook his head.

“Is Y/n here?” John B asked with annoyance, once he located Rafe with her eyes.

“The last time I saw her she was with Rafe, so maybe.” Kie said looking around, hoping to find you in the crowd.

“Maybe.” JJ said more to himself than to anyone around him.

He turned around to go back to the girl that was now, even more closer to his lips than before. He needed to get you out of his head, the fact that he couldn’t even if he had a girl on his lap ready to do anything JJ ever did with different girls at parties was so strange that he even thought of moving the girl aside and ending the party and hopefully fall asleep, not like the night before, but when he saw you quickly walking towards the Chateau, his worry grew up even bigger and the thought of leaving the party seemed more interesting now.

The way that you were covering your face with your hand made him furrowed his eyebrows and gently move the girl from his lap, which she complained but JJ was already walking towards the Chateau, leaving everything behind.

“What are you doing here?” He asked once he saw you sitting down on the couch, with your elbows resting on your knees and your hands covering your face.

“Get the fuck out.” You said. The living room of the house was only being illuminated by the light of the moon so JJ couldn’t see you clearly. But he did notice your heavy breathing and your foot going quickly up and down, making the situation even more weirder.

“Y/n-”

“Get out!” You yelled so loudly and out of the blue that it caught JJ off guard, making him take a step back. But he wasn’t done.

“No, what the fuck are you doing here alone? Are you alright?”

“What do you care?” You asked. You were making sure your face wasn’t illuminated by the poor light that was hitting the room. You clearly didn’t want JJ to see you, and he noticed that. “Get out and go back to the girl you were about to fuck.”

“Stop being a fucking brat and look at me for fucks sake!”

“And why should I do what you want JJ?! Leave me the fuck alone!”

“No! No until you tell me what’s going on with you!”

“Why should I?!” You turned around to see him with the anger that you felt in your body, but quickly went back, remembering what you had in your face. “You don’t fucking care.”

JJ was starting to feel irritated and annoyed at your attitude. So he let out a big sigh and covered his face with his hands to calm himself down and not take the situation to an ever more bad turn. But his mind was playing tricks on him. “Alright! Maybe I will go back to the party and fuck the girl I was with because I can’t fucking stand you and your annoying ass!”

You didn’t respond immediately. You felt a tear coming down your cheek and your throat hurting so much you felt the need to rip it out. “I hate you.” You finally said, softer than your prior tone.

“Well... the feeling is mutual.”

“Then fucking leave.”

“You know what? Maybe you and Rafe are fucking perfect for each other. You two are just two spoiled brats that your only concerns are where to buy your next boat!”

“Is that what you think? Is that what you fucking think!?” You’ve had enough of his words, so without thinking your next move, you got up from the couch and walked closer to him. “You’re so fucking blind that you can’t see what’s in front of your eyes no matter how many times you have it in front of you!”

JJ quickly looked down to your lower lip and your chin where he noticed something new in your face. He furrowed his eyebrows and that’s when you remembered. You looked down when you realized it was too late, he saw it.

A little red scratch was on the side of your lower lip, making them a little bit more bigger than usual. The line went perfectly with another one on your chin, making a big red line on the lower side of your face. Something that you hoped JJ didn’t give much thought into it, but you were clearly so dumb to think that.

“What is that?” He asked looking at you in the eyes, but you quickly broke the eye contact.

“Nothing, leave me alone.” You walked back but JJ grabbed your arm, not giving you the opportunity to walk away from him.

“Y/n, you’re hurt!”

“And so fucking what?!” You yelled but he didn’t answered in the same tone, instead he tried to gently grab your chin to see it better.

“Let me see it.”

“Fuck off.” You pushed his hand away and tried to walk away, but the grip that JJ had in your arm didn’t let you. “JJ! Let me go!”

“No, Y/n, let me see it because I think you need to patch it up!”

“Fuck off!” With a quick move, you managed to leave JJ’s grip and walk back, but he tried to take your chin back to his hand. “Stop it JJ!” You yelled but he wasn’t listening, you tried your hardest to move but the pain that you sudden felt was so strong that you gave in, letting JJ grab your chin.

Once he saw that you were more calm, he grabbed your chin more softly and started to caress your chin with his thumb. The only thing that was on your ears was yours and JJ’s heavy breathing because of the sudden movements you just did a couple of seconds ago. He ended so close to your face that you could feel his hot breath against your skin, making you feel butterflies on your stomach.

With his eyes, he slowly started to move from your eyes to your chin while his thumb was still gently caressing your chin. Once his eyes stopped on your scratch, he pulled your face up so the light of the moon could let him see more clearly.

Your eyes couldn’t part from his, how he was watching carefully your wound and how the feeling of his thumb on your chin made you even more weak. This new feeling that you were experiencing was so unexpected that at some point, you being under his eyes, make you feel uncomfortable. Until you saw his jaw getting clenched and the anger in his eyes.

“Who this did to you?” He said firmly going straight to your eyes. His eyes felt like they were penetrating you, so with slow hands you grabbed his hand that was holding your chin with the intention to end the moment right there, but he wasn’t letting it go. “Was it Rafe?” He asked more firmly now, but with more anger in his voice. Once you gave him the eye contact that he was longing for, he immediately understood what your eyes were trying to say. He did a little nod and bit his lower lip once he let go of your chin and did a quick turn to walk out of the house, already knowing where his next stop was going to be. And you did too.

“JJ!” You yelled trying to stop him, but it was too late, he was already out of the house.

“Cameron!” You heard JJ yell once you stepped out of the house with quick steps. You saw how JJ was quickly walking towards Rafe, who was now looking at him with a grin.

“Pogue! It’s Mr. Cameron for y-” Rafe was saying, but JJ’s fist didn’t let him finish since it was already on his face, leaving it with a incredibly big pain.

John B immediately appeared after that and grabbed JJ by the arm, with the help of Pope. You saw Rafe grabbing his chin in pain, but a couple of seconds later he was already going towards JJ, clearly not letting the Pogue get the first and last punch. But your body and hand on his chest made him stop.

“Stop it!”

“You’re very stupid for doing that Pogue!” Rafe yelled with blood all over his mouth and chin, making him look even more crazier than he already was.

“Rafe! Leave him alone!” You yelled again with more anger, hoping to get his attention.

He looked at you disgusted. “You? Defending him?” He pointed at JJ with his eyes on you, but once he heard JJ moving again he went back to him and you turned around, seeing the disaster that was behind you.

“You fucking leave her alone!” JJ yelled while he was being held by his friends. “Fucking asshole!”

“JJ? What is going on?” Kie asked looking worryingly at you and your chin.

“You dirty Pogue!” Rafe moved you aside with strength that almost made you lose balance to go towards JJ, but you recovered quickly and grabbed his arm with your whole strength, making him slower his steps.

“Rafe! Please! Do not hurt him!” This time, it seemed that Rafe heard you and actually took your words into his brain, since he stopped and looked back at you.

“You’re lucky my girl is here, Maybank.” He said looking dead at you in the eyes with a grin coming out of his lips. You felt the tears fighting to come out, but you hold them back, not wanting to show any type of feeling on that moment.

“Your girl?” You heard JJ ask with anger going back and forth from you and Rafe. But after a couple of seconds he stopped on you, with his heavy breathing and the pain in his eyes, he asked softly: “Are you back with him?”

On that moment you knew that Rafe said something that led to Kie also saying something, but you didn’t hear anything of it. All your attention was on JJ and his eyes, you could feel the pain in his eyes just like they were your own. Your heart was beating faster than ever and your mind was having so many questions. Your eyes saw a single tear coming down his cheek and that made your heart drop to your stomach, making you want to leave Rafe’s side and hug him like there was no tomorrow. But before you could do anything else, he let go of John B’s grip and quickly turned around, leaving the beach behind.

Your feet stayed put since you felt Rafe’s arm going around your shoulders, the party still going around you and Kie talking shit about the Kooks, but somehow you couldn’t hear any of it. It was all silence and one thought going on and on on your mind: You don’t do all of that for someone you hate.

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[belphies-cuhm-sluht]

Vacation (Belphie x GN!Reader) Slight NSFW

(Did I go extra hard on the beach fic? Yes. Yes I did. Are my posting hours absolutely horrid... also yes. It's 3:30AM and I finally finished this fic though! YAY! I also did not read through this before I posted. I'll read it when I wake up to check for mistakes. I need a nap.)

Word Count : 5.1K

You loved the beach, everything about it was so relaxing. The sound of the waves crashing onto the shore, the smell of saltwater that was carried to your nose with the ocean’s breeze. The only thing that made being there right now better was the fact that Belphie was there with you. You loved Belphie, everything about him screamed perfection, even though he disagreed most of the time you said he was. His disregard for most of humanity aside from yourself, his constant scowl which he probably thought was menacing and scary but you just found it adorable.

It was shocking at first that he actually agreed to go with you, and you thought for sure that he’d want to stay home and just sleep while, but, much to your surprise, he jumped at the opportunity to go to the beach with you. He even said that it would be fun, which… well he wasn’t wrong… but hearing him say something like that… even if it was mumbled, it was kind of shocking.

“You got a room… in a hotel… that’s on the beach… with a balcony that overlooks the beach?” Belphie said, looking around the room as the two of you walked in. As soon as the door was shut, you dropped your bags to the floor and ran to the balcony doors, throwing them open and running out to lean over the railing with Belphie following close behind and quickly wrapping his arms around you. “Don’t do that. You could have flipped over the edge… dork.”

You could only laugh at his worry, but then again, according to him you were fragile, and humans were inherently clumsy most of the time, so you didn’t really blame him for thinking that you’d accidentally lean too far over and do a front flip over the railing… but it was still kind of funny. “I’m not going to fall over the edge, Belph. I’ve done this a lot. And…” You turned in his arms so you could wrap your own around his waist. “Yes, a balcony with an ocean view. The weather said there would be a thunderstorm this week, and I’m hoping they’re right. I love watching the lightning hit the water… the thunder is so loud. It’s amazing.” He chuckled softly, rolling his eyes as he grabbed your hand and dragged you back into the room, not wanting to leave you on the balcony unattended any longer.

“The storm better not hit until the last day. I want to go surfing.” He said as he grabbed his own bag off the floor and moved it onto the bed, quickly pulling out his bathing suit. You were stuck on the whole surfing thing though because… well… it doesn’t need to be explained. It’s just fucking hot. He snapped his fingers to get your attention after you hadn’t responded, rolling his eyes when you blinked a few times and focused back on him. “You alright? You zoned out for a second there.”

“Mhm… I’m good.” You whispered shyly, dragging your own bags away from the door so you could pull out your own bathing suit. “It’s a good time to go down… everyone is clearing out for the day and the sun isn’t going to be beating as hard.” You weren’t really sure if he was listening, you could still hear him rummaging through his own bag as you talked. You were mainly talking to yourself though, looking up out the balcony doors and watching as the umbrellas on the beach slowly dwindled as everyone started heading back to their own hotels.

“You still need sunscreen.” It actually sounded like he was scolding you, and it wouldn’t be the first time he called your ass out for not wearing it. “I’m not having you get burnt on our first day here. You’ll spend the rest of the vacation in pain, and then I’ll have to hold back from saying I told you so because you won’t be in the mood to hear it. Plus…” He tossed the sunscreen onto the bed that was closest to you before squatting down behind you, trailing his fingers along your neck and down your shoulders. “If you got burnt… you wouldn’t enjoy me touching you as much…”

God damn if he wasn’t right, and you hated that he was right. “Hmph… fine.” You groaned, and honestly, you just hated the way the sunscreen felt. It made your arms stick to your sides and you just felt… sticky… and you could never get it off your hands after putting it on. It was a pain in the ass… but he was right, and you wouldn’t be able to enjoy anything if you got burnt, and you definitely weren’t going to spend an entire week in a nice ass hotel with an ocean view and not at least cuddle with him. “You’re putting it on me though.”

“I never said I wouldn’t.” He said it teasingly, kissing your neck before standing back up. “Go change. The waves look pretty good right now, I want to get down there.” He had already started pulling his shirt off and unbuttoning his shorts as you got up off the floor. It was one thing for him to change in front of the balcony doors, he didn’t really care if anyone saw him naked… But he didn’t want anyone else to see you that way. Only he could, and if someone did happen to see you that way, he’d have to kill them and then it would ruin the vacation and neither of you wanted that.

Of course he held your hand on the way down the beach. He wasn’t going to let anyone else look at you, and even if they did, they’d see that your hand was in his and you were his, so they better just fuck right off with their thoughts and their intentions because it isn’t going to happen and you aren’t going to do the things that they are thinking with anyone but him.

“I hate walking in the sand with flip flops…” You mumbled as your feet sunk into the sand with every step, struggling to take steps because the sand kept basically absorbing your flip flop which is the most annoying shit.

“You could always go barefoot.” He said, as if you didn’t already know that… but also walking barefoot on the beach after the sun had been beating on it for hours wasn’t the most pleasant experience either.

“I’d rather not burn my feet… How close do you want to get to the water anyway? I usually stay close to the top so I don’t have to be around all the people.” Which was the truth. You hated being surrounded by other beach goers, and most of them smelt an awful lot like spray tan or beer or both. The ocean breeze would miraculously always start up whenever they were spraying their spray tans on and it would get in your eyes or your mouth, and you’d just rather not be anywhere near them. Plus… who puts on spray tan at the beach? Just lay in the sun. It’s easier and looks more real because it is real. Ugh… people.

“Close enough that I can still see you from the ocean. Right here should be good…” He stopped right at the middle of where the line of umbrellas started and where there was nobody. It was like an invisible line in the sand, and Belphie decided that he wanted his spot to be on both sides of it. He stuck the umbrella into the sand to mark the spot and you finally let yourself sit down before even putting down the towel. You were tired. Walking through the sand is a workout. “Don’t get too comfortable. You’re forgetting something.” He practically cooed the last part to you, and you knew exactly what he was talking about, but you wished that he had forgotten.

He started digging through the bag that you had loaded with drinks and snacks because the beach experience isn’t complete unless you’ve tried to eat a sandwich while a multitude of seagulls stand at the edge of your towel and squawk at you to feed them. (But you don’t because it’s not healthy for them. Please don’t feed the seagulls your food.) “I don’t need sunscreen. I’m just gonna be sitting under the umbrella the whole time.” He hummed softly, knowing that you were wrong. Who goes to the beach and sits under the umbrella the whole time? You knew that you weren’t going to, but damn… you really hated the feeling of sunscreen. It makes you cringe. Why is it so sticky????

You laid out the towel and decided that it would be pointless to even try to argue against him. He was right in the hotel room about the sunburn, and it wouldn’t be as bad if he was the one rubbing it on you. “I’m sure a little sunscreen is better than a sunburn…” He said as he squirted it onto his hands. “Lay down, I said I’d put it on you.” You quickly obliged, laying on your stomach and resting your head on your arms as he rubbed it together between his hands before placing them on your shoulders. The feeling sent a shiver through you, and you weren’t sure whether it was just because the sunscreen was cold or if it was his touch that made your body respond that way. “You’re cute… relax babe… this isn’t the first time I’ve touched you.” He teased as his hands made their way down your back, squeezing your sides lightly before rubbing slowly over your entire back and then working down to your legs. Luckily your face was hidden in your arms so he couldn’t see your blushing. His touch was doing things to you that you knew you couldn’t act upon on the beach so it would probably be a while before you got up anyway. “Alright, roll over.” He didn’t really wait for you to roll over, taking it upon himself to do it and then smiling smugly when he saw the flustered look on your face.

“I think I’m just gonna…. Stay here for a little bit… while you go out and…” He had already started running his hands over your chest which had made your sentence get cut short. It would be too noticeable that he was making you flustered if you just covered your face now, so you tried to keep calm as his hands continued to work. You let out a gasp as his thumbs accidentally flicked over your nipples, a quiet hum escaping him as he watched them perk up. “Belphie…” You whined, but he only laughed in response, moving his hands lower until they were at your hips. Your eyes grew wider, and he knew exactly why, and for a second you thought he’d just tease you more, but he knew that if he did that you’d just be begging him to take you back to the room and those activities were for later.

He had finally finished, and part of you wished that he hadn’t because obviously you loved having his hands on you like that, but also you were in public and it couldn’t go any further than that either. “So do you want to go down there with me or do you need a minute?” He joked as he got up, grabbing his surfboard and holding it under his arm. “Would you rather me stay up here wi-”

“You can go! I just… Just need a second.” Your voice cracked as you said it, further accentuating just how flustered he had made you. You ran your hands over your face and sighed, to which he laughed at. “Don’t laugh, it’s not funny.” You grumbled. You were now thoroughly turned on, it was hot out, you were covered in sunscreen, and he looked really good standing above you like that.

“It actually is really funny. I’ll meet you down there… oh wait… hold up…” He leaned over, booping your nose with his pointer finger which still had sunscreen on it. You wrinkled your nose at him, sticking your tongue out before rolling over onto your stomach. “Aww, you’ll thank me for it later when your nose is sunburn free and not peeling.” He started walking off, that much you could tell as the sun that he had been blocking finally hit your back.

It didn’t take too long for you to gain back your composure. Now that he was off walking down to the ocean, you could actually focus on calming down and relaxing in the sun that was practically baking you because the umbrella wasn’t blocking out anything now that the sun was setting. The sound of the waves crashing against the shore and the warmth of the sun against your skin had you close to dozing off, but you wanted to see him, you wanted to watch him, so you fought off the urge to fall asleep and pushed yourself up off the towel and started heading down.

The beach had almost completely cleared out aside from the few people who, much like yourself and Belphie, wanted to enjoy it without the screaming children who’d run through the sand and kick it back onto the towels and bodies of unsuspecting people. It was a lot calmer during the evening, and Belphie had a lot of room to do what he wanted to do. Not a lot of people here actually surfed, it was mainly people boogie boarding close to the shore line and riding the smallest waves inland. You on the other hand, you didn’t use a board at all, instead wading out into the deepest part of the ocean until your feet could barely touch the floor, and then when a wave came, you’d jump and ride that shit up to the shore… or get knocked out completely and wash up on the shore looking like you’ve just seen death itself. Either way it’s a blast, and boards held no appeal to you… BUT…

Belphie on the board was a completely different story though. There was something about… him in general that made you so fascinated. Your eyes were basically glued to him, watching intently as he got onto his board and started paddling out deeper. You saw the wave that he was going for, it was forming further back, almost on the horizon line and you knew that it would be huge, which is exactly what he was going for. Go big or go home was always his thing, whether it was with food, pranks against his brothers, and with this as well…clearly. Were you worried, even though you knew that as a demon, he couldn’t actually get severely hurt? Absolutely. He’d probably laugh at you later for worrying, but you also cared about him a lot, so could he blame you? Absolutely not.

You watched as the wave drew closer, and for a second you were beyond worried that it would just crush him since he was sitting there just wading in the water, but as it started closing in, he began paddling again, his board rising with the crest of the wave until he reached the top and stood up. Now, it’s not that you had never seen people surfing before, it’s just that everyone else was boring and you didn’t like them and they weren’t interesting, and they were just… people. Belphie was different. This was your demon and here he was absolutely fucking ripping it, and not only was was he doing it flawlessly, but he looked so fucking good doing it. You wanted to cheer for him, but you also didn’t want to throw him off or anything, so you let out a quiet “yay” as you continued watching. The wave crashed down and broke around him, pushing him closer to you and for a second you thought that he’d ride it all the way up to you, but then he saw you. He pointed at you, the typical finger guns, and then promptly decided to purposely fall back off his board, which made you gasp because like… what the fuck man? Why?

BUT ALSO GOD DAMN. When he reemerged from under the water, he looked fucking…. Hot. And not like, “oh shit it’s summertime and the sun is making things hot” kind of hot… no, it was “holy hell I need to get this man back into the hotel room before I fuck him right here on the beach” type hot, which is still an understatement because there is no way to actually capture the essence of how absolutely hot he is through words. He’s just fucking… hot. He quickly pushed back his hair which was soaked and hanging in his face, and now it was slicked back, which wasn’t a look that you’d usually go for, but on him, again… HOT.

Were you aware that you had been holding your breath as he walked up to you? Nope. But as soon as he reached you, you exhaled sharply and gave him a sheepish smile. “That was… you did… it was great…” You couldn’t think straight and you couldn’t form coherent sentences, and the way you were acting had that smug little smile returning to his face. He knew damn well the way you were feeling, the way he made you feel. He didn’t have to wait for you to fall asleep and see your dreams to know what you were thinking either. But he wasn’t going to let you have it that easily either, he was going to tease you and drag it out as long as he possibly could.

“Come on…” He grabbed your hand, pulling you out into the water which was freezing. It was so cold, your entire body kind of froze up as soon as it reached your mid calves. “It’ll be more cold if you try to slowly get used to it. Just dunk yourself under real quick.” He stopped pulling you long enough to watch you, and what he was suggesting was quite possibly the number one thing you didn’t want to do right now. “I can do it for you if you won’t do it yourself.” He coaxed, stepping a little closer to you. He was serious too, he’d dunk you, whether you were holding your nose or not.

“I-I got it… I can do it…” You mumbled, slowly lowering yourself and then shooting back up when the water reached an area that had been dry before. You could almost see the timer in his head ticking down to the moment where he’d just take over and sweep you off your feet in the most unromantic way just to get you used to the water faster. “Don’t look at me while I… You’re making me nervous!” It was a good excuse. He scoffed and turned away from you, humming the jeopardy song which only made you feel more rushed. “Shush! I’m doing it… I just need a second.”

“You’ve had many seconds. It’s gonna be dark soon.” He joked, tapping his fingers along the water as he started humming louder. You groaned loudly before taking a deep breath, holding your nose, and dropping under the water. And, not surprisingly, it was fucking freezing, and when you quickly pushed yourself back up, the breeze that had really picked up didn’t help… like at all. “There you go. It wasn’t that bad, was it?”

“No… it was worse.” He snorted softly, shaking his head. You couldn’t understand how he wasn’t fazed by it. Whenever he was in bed he’d complain about it being too cold when he was too lazy to reach down and grab his blankets… but swimming in an ice cube tray apparently doesn’t affect him. It made absolutely no sense, but… he looked happy, and he was having fun, and as numb as your body felt from the water, seeing him this way made you feel warm, at least in your heart, where it was important. “So why am I actually in the water right now?” You would have been perfectly fine staying just above where the waves broke, but he must have had something in mind.

“We’re tandem surfing.” He drummed his hands lightly on the board as he looked excitedly over at you as if you knew what that meant. He could see the confusion on your face though, and he sighed softly, pulling you closer to himself and the board. “You’re gonna be on the board with me.” That… sounded like a trainwreck waiting to happen. It would not go well, you knew that much. You wouldn’t be able to even sit on the board without wobbling, and you sure as hell wouldn’t be able to stand on it. “You’ll be fine.” He could see how put off by the idea of it you were. No amount of his arms wrapped around you would make flipping off a surfboard in the middle of a wave worth it.

“Mmmm… Nope… that’s not gonna… Nuh uh….” You were shaking your head quickly, trying to keep your footing even when you were flat on the ground as the waves crashed around you. They were strong, as was the current that was pulling you deeper into the ocean without you even realizing it. “I can just go stand back up there… I’ll watch you. That sounds like a good idea.” You nodded to yourself, turning to start walking away, but his arm was around your waist, holding you close against him and keeping you from walking away.

“I’m not gonna let you fall off. We’re not going far out… and we’re both sitting the whole time.” He murmured against your neck, knowing exactly what he was doing. “Plus… It’s cold out there… and I want to do this with you.” He made you so weak, it wasn’t fair at all. His fingers brushed lightly across your hip as his lips lingered against your skin. He was waiting for an answer, but he already knew what it would be, he just wanted to hear you say it, and he was having way too much fun teasing you like this. “Fine… just… hold it still.” His hand quickly moved away from your waist and he was wearing the biggest smile as he held the board in place as best he could. The waves crashing around it were the biggest issue, and every time you were about to jump up onto it, another wave would push it against you and make you stumble back. “Belphie… It’s not gonna work.” You whined, your head falling back as you sighed loudly.

“I’m holding it as still as I can, you just need to get on. I’ll tell you when, so the waves won’t knock you off.” He was being really persistent with it, which, in it’s own way, was kind of cute. Either he really wanted you on the board with him, or he really wanted to see you fall off. Sure, he liked you, but even you knew there was something… comical… about watching someone fall off a board… especially if they were just sitting. That’s even funnier. “If you do it… we can go right back to the hotel after we’re done… I know you want to do that.” He’s god damn right you want to do that. Not just for… reasons, but the thought of warm dry clothes and being under a blanket and cuddling with him sounded so amazing right now.

It was motivation enough for you to try again, timing your jump before the next wave came and then gripping onto the board like your life depended on it, because you really thought that it did, once you were on. “Okay…. Now what?” Your voice was kind of shaky, and really, you thought you should be rewarded with the hotel just for getting on the board alone. The waves were rocking you, and you felt like you were going to tip at any moment if Belphie let go, and you were really hoping that he wouldn’t, but when you turned to look at him, he was already behind you, getting ready to jump on the board. “Sh-Shouldn’t I be in the back…?” It was a pretty bad time to realize it considering you were already on it, but you still had time to jump off and switch positions.

“Oh… No. If you’re in the back, you’ll just hide your face in my back as soon as the wave starts pushing us, and that’s the best part.” He climbed onto the back of the board, scooting as close to you as possible. “Now hold on, okay? I’m gonna get us a little further out.” Your head whipped around to look at him, your eyes going wide. You were pretty sure he just said that you wouldn’t go out far, but now he’s saying he’s gotta get out further? He chuckled lightly, shaking his head as if he knew what you were thinking. “Not as far as I went. Just far enough to actually have a wave. The swells aren’t going to do much except rock us around a little bit.” He was already paddling out and your hold on the board turned into a death grip.

Once he felt like it was far enough out, he turned the board around, and that’s when you realized just how far you actually were. “I’m gonna die…” You whispered, which only made him laugh more, leaning in to kiss along your shoulder. “That’s not gonna make me feel better.” Your nails were practically digging into the board and your knuckles hurt from how tight you were holding it, but you didn’t really care, you just didn’t want to fall off.

“Oh, the waves coming! Hold on.” As if you weren’t already doing that, and you couldn’t possibly hold on any tighter than you already were. The wave began pushing you up, and you didn’t, not even for a second, enjoy the sensation of it. “Keep your eyes open.” His arms were wrapped tightly around you, and even with his urging, your eyes were shut as tight as possible, already prepared for when you’d fall off. You didn’t want salt water in your eyes, it burned, it hurt, and you were like 99.5% sure that you’d be falling off at some point.

His arms stayed wrapped around you, as tight as possible, ensuring that you wouldn’t fall off the board and you were beyond thankful for that. In a strange way, it didn’t last that long, but at the same time it felt like you were riding the wave forever. You had opened your eyes once, but the sight of the beach growing closer and closer to you was terrifying and you didn’t like it. “Is it done?” You quietly asked, not wanting to open your eyes yet, but you also felt like you’ve slowed down and you could feel the rocking of the waves beneath you again.

“Yes, it’s done. Your eyes were shut the entire time, weren’t they?” He joked, squeezing your hips which made you squirm and fall off the board anyway. His laughter was so loud you could hear it from under the water, and you quickly pushed your feet up against the edge of the board to try to tip him off as well, which didn’t actually work. You got back up, wiping the water from your eyes and glaring at him, still sitting on the board and smiling down at you. “You thought you’d be able to tip me over… that’s cute. You’re cute. Come, we’ll go back now. We can both take a nap before dinner.”

The sand had finally cooled off now that the sun had practically set behind the horizon line, lighting the waves up in pretty pink, orange, and blue hues. If you weren’t so cold, you’d have loved to stay on the beach and watch the sun continue to go down with Belphie right beside you. That could be done another night though, and you were aching to get back inside and take a shower to get the sand off of you, and then just relax in bed.

“I call dibs on the bathroom first.” You called out as you swiped the card to get into the room, rushing ahead of him to drop your beach bag on the floor and run straight into the bathroom. The sand was sticking to you, not just from being in the water, but also the damned sunscreen. It was itchy and it was everywhere, and you wanted to get it off of you as quickly as you could.

“You don’t have to call dibs, I could just get in there with you.” He said it so matter-of-factly that it made you pause for a second. He wasn’t wrong, and it’s not that you’d mind him getting in with you, so you weren’t going to say no. He walked in just as you were getting into the shower, and no matter how many times he had seen you that way, you still got really shy, which he would constantly say is adorable, but it just made you flustered and even more shy than you already were. “Did you have fun?” His voice was soft now, and you could hear that he was becoming tired. You were sure that he’d end up falling asleep on the beach after being in the ocean, it was enough to even knock you out most of the time, but he held onto enough energy to get up into the room.

“Mmhm… I liked watching you more though…” You heard him hum quietly behind you, his hands roaming over your body as he helped get some of the off. You could have done it yourself, but he did it so much better. “Did you have fun?” It sounded like he had fun, and it definitely looked like he had fun. He was laughing and smiling the whole time which was enough for you. His happiness made you happy, as cringy and dorky as that may sound… which is why you never told him that. He’d call you a dork and laugh it off which would just make you flustered and feel silly.

“Mmhm… I have one more thing to do though.” You were confused because you were pretty sure he was talking about dinner and that was supposed to come after the nap. He finished rinsing the sand and soap off you and himself before turning off the shower and stepping out. He didn’t bother with towels, grabbing your hand and pulling you out of the bathroom and pushing you down on the bed, situating himself between your legs and smiling up at you. “I teased you enough on the beach… I think I should finish what I started.”

[adorerdraco]

Bugs and Hisses ✧ Draco x Reader

Summary: Halloween with Draco <3 Friends into BOO’s (teehee)

Warnings: mild drinking nothing tooo crazy but not encouraging it !

Words: 5.2K

A/N: this is my first one shot in like a month and i ofc had to do something for halloween even tho im a tad late but its still a halloweekend KIND OF !!!!!!! </3 I HOPE ITS GOOOD

“No, it’s a stupid holiday.”

Draco crossed his arms in a stubborn child-like way, a scowl on his face as he stared forward towards the front of the class where Snape was giving a lecture on the small but vicious Erkling creatures.

“Come on, please,” you pleaded quietly. Your gaze kept flickering between your easily-irked professor and the pouting blond beside you, hoping that in a few short seconds you would get the answer you were hoping for that way you could get back into your notes instead of possibly getting a detention or losing house points.

In all the years you’ve been friends with the Prince of Slytherin, you learned that he loathed the holiday and any festivities that came with it. Every year, you beg him to go out to one of the many parties that are thrown ranging from small gatherings to full-on blowouts or just do something halloween related with you, but he always refuses. His reasoning, as he put it, was that he was simply ‘too mature to be dressing up as a foul creature.’

You knew he mostly spent the holiday either asleep in his dorm or walking around aimlessly with Crabbe and Goyle to target unsuspecting first-years after the big feast but this year, you finally had enough of his anti-halloween agenda. You wanted to spend the evening and hopefully night with him laughing by your side and showing him how fun everything could be, but most of all - you wanted to see him in a costume.

“Please, if you go I will never ask you for anything ever again,” you tried again once Snape had turned his back to the class. 

Draco pursed his lips as though he was genuinely considering it, his eyes still locked on the back of the greasy-haired professor before he turned slightly to you with a deep sigh. “Fine, but don’t expect this to be an annual thing.”

You gave him a bright smile, holding yourself back from jumping around in your seat and completely pushing aside the desire to throw your arms around him in excitement.

“I promise you’ll have fun.”

He hid the small smile that grew on his face from seeing how happy his answer made you, turning his head down towards his parchment filled with notes that all of a sudden seemed interesting as he avoided your gaze. He wouldn’t admit it, but he was the smallest bit of excited at the thought of spending the holiday with you because he knew that wherever you went or whatever you did, he would be perfectly content with you by his side because for the first time in all your years as friends; he realized only a month ago that the weird fluttering feeling in the pit of his stomach when he was around you or the weird overwhelming warmth that spread throughout his entire body like an ocean of water breaking through a dam - was a crush. He hated it at first, noticing and begrudgingly acknowledging it. He thought it was cliche that he somehow fell for one of his closest friends and mostly, he thought that he was going to ruin the friendship entirely. He wanted to wreck it himself, trying to distance himself from you and being extra mean - but he couldn’t.

He adored your company too much and everything that came with you. He adores your laugh, your smile, your hugs when you greet him and how you somehow give him one each time he needs it the most. He adores the study-buddy system you guys have almost every other week before a quiz or an exam. He adores your bad jokes and clumsy accidents even though those qualities annoy him with anyone else. He adores the way you want him to join you in everything fun you and he especially adores the times when he overhears you talking about him as if he’s your favorite person in the world.

Bottom line, he’s all about you.

So when this season of spookiness came, he was expecting your pleading for him to spend the day with you. Only this time, it only took you a couple times before he ultimately agreed to give in to you.

You were ready to explode with thrill at the thought of what the night held in store for you and you didn’t hide it one bit. When the big Hogwarts Hallowe’en feast was over and every one began spilling out from the Great Hall and into the main foyer, you were searching restlessly for a clean mop of silver hair that almost always stuck out in the mass of students. You weren’t sure if you were able to spot him anywhere in under a few seconds because he was unimaginably important to you, or because his hair was so uniquely bright, or maybe it was how boisterous and loud Crabbe and Goyle always were when they were by him, especially if he was with other Slytherins - but you found him, every single time with ease.

After standing on your tippy-toes several times to overlook the stampede of everyone, you finally spotted Draco leaning across a pillar with his arms crossed and a smirk on his face while he stood in a circle of his House friends that included his two goons and his quidditch teammates. You watched him thoughtfully as you approached, taking slow steps towards the group to admire him from afar and also because they were all slightly intimidating. He looked lost in the conversation, laughs escaping from his upturned lips as he listened to whatever was being said, large pale hands running through his hair every so often when the front pieces of his hair would flop down to his forehead. 

He looked ridiculously good and effortlessly at that.

You weren’t sure if you should interrupt, hesitating a few feet away from them to where they couldn’t sense your presence but you were close enough to see and hear them clearly.

“We’ll see you later tonight then, Malfoy?” One of the boys nodded towards Draco.

“I’ll show up for a bit, I suppose,” he shrugs.

You see him look around the circle of boys, eyes landing on you momentarily and then back to his friends before doing a double-take towards you again in surprise. You tried to ignore the butterflies erupting in your stomach when his smile widens slightly into a short-lived toothy grin while he said a quick goodbye to his friends causing them all to disband and him to start approaching you.

“Are you ready for the halloween of a lifetime?” You ask as he neared.

He rolled his eyes, laughing faintly. “Where am I meeting you, darling?”

The nick name he used so rarely for you made your knees feel weak, a warm blush rushing up your neck and inching onto your cheeks that you knew was going to be very apparent on your face in a few seconds.

“I’ll meet you right here in an hour,” you say quickly.

You didn’t give him time to answer before you turned quickly in the direction of your common room and began rushing away before he could see the effect he had on you that was so clearly appearing on your face.

You didn’t know what the night held for you and Draco or where it would lead you. Unknowing to you, you were both hoping something more could come out of the evening between the two of you. But he wasn’t one to express himself in that department of feelings and you weren’t feeling bold enough to say anything about yours. It was a gray area of hoping that fate could somehow intervene and throw the two of you into what you both wanted without either of you really saying anything - but it was impossible. There was no outcome or situation you had in mind that could lead you into that, so you were stuck desperately hoping that one day things might end up differently.

It was beginning to feel ironic how in your world full of real tangible magic, there wasn’t a magical solution to your problem. You were trapped feeling like a muggle who had to figure things out by themselves, no magic included. The thought of giving him a love potion did cross your mind as a joke, but it wasn’t a genuine or fair option but little did you know, you don’t need a potion for him to feel the same way - because he already did.

Walking into your dorm felt like an exuberant disaster of everyone running around and sitting in front of mirrors with their makeup or dressing into their costumes. It was noisy and filled with chatter and you were in shock from how much clutter everyone was able to make in such a short period of time from when the feast ended to now. A simple spell would clean everything up so you and everybody else didn’t really pay it any mind. 

You maneuvered around the mess of your housemates and towards your bed where your costume was kept in the trunk underneath it, plopping down onto the floor to pull it from the underskirt of your House colored bedding.

“Did he finally say yes?” Your closest roomie friend jumped onto your bed, propping herself up on her elbows and resting her chin on her hands as she watched you dig through your bottomless trunk. 

“Surprisingly, yes,” you answered, hiding the smile on your face. 

She drawled out a teasing ‘ooh,’ poking your arm lightly with her index finger as you shied away and leaned deeper into your trunk. She was the only one who you willingly admitted your crush to as she was the only person you really trusted to not blather it off to someone.

“Will I be seeing you two in the Slytherin common room?” She wiggled her eyebrows. “The boys are throwing a party and I luckily got an invite, you know how they are. So picky with who shows up.”

“You mean they’re pretentious?” You laugh. “But I don’t know if we’ll be going to it. I know Draco obviously got invited but I was thinking we could do other things.”

“Like what?” She questions as if she knew it was going to be something dirty. “I know a few secret spots around the castle-”

“No, get your mind out of the gutter,” you smack her arm lightly. “I honestly have no clue what to do. I didn’t think he’d actually agree because he never does.”

She runs her hands over her face, stifling her laughs of disbelief before she sighed loudly. “I still suggest some broom closets, hidden out of sight.”

You sit up, pushing her from where she was lying while she laughed amusingly at your false horrified reaction that you put on to hide the fact from her that what she was suggestion really was what you wanted. 

“I’ll leave you alone so you can get your costume on,” she smiles, jumping up from your bed and tossing one of your pillows at you as she walked away. You let out a huff, tossing it back onto your duvet before setting your costume down on the spot your friend was lying in.

You stared at it hesitantly, all of a sudden feeling nauseous at the thought of going out later with Draco as if it was some sort of date even though you knew it wasn’t. It was just two friends, hanging out, doing some spooky and fun Halloween activities together and nothing more; so why were you feeling so nervous? You weren’t sure if it was your instincts warning you of something major that was approaching or the fear that what you didn’t have planned was going to bite you in the arse when you continuously told Draco he was going to enjoy himself when you didn’t even know if that was going to be true. You didn’t want to disappoint him and mess it up for you in the future when the holiday came again and you didn’t want this to be the first and last time you experienced it with him. 

The pressure was raining down on you like thick, hard pieces of hail with no end in sight.

As you were getting dressed and doing your makeup for your costume as you liked, (i’m trying to be vague for your own imagination teehee) all you could think about was what in the hell you were going to do once you met up with the Prince of Slytherin. Your train of thought was then derailed into wondering what he was going to be dressed up as or if he was going to be dressed up at all considering the way he is. He was the type to make fun of people who dressed up, that you knew when you ran into him last year as you were walking back to your common room with your friend, both of you in costume and victims of his gentle bullying. He obviously went easier on the two of you since you were there, telling you he was just messing around afterwards and saying he liked yours but once you were out of his sight but still in ear-shot, you heard him and his two minions berating a small group of people that unfortunately passed by them. 

You gave yourself one last look in the floor mirror, letting out a long shaky exhale with your hands clasped together before you started towards the way out of your dorm, through the common room, and ultimately towards the foyer outside the Great Hall where Draco was most likely waiting for you. An hour had gone by since you last saw him, an hour of stress and panic that hadn’t slowed down or stopped.

Your shoes dragged against the stone floors, hugging yourself tightly as you walked nearer towards the spot where you were supposed to meet and as you lifted your gaze - you saw him there, staring right at you with a small grin and just like you expected, no costume.

“Nice costume,” he compliments when you reach him. 

“Where’s yours?” You frown.

“I’m not dressing up. That’s embarrassing,” he shakes his head. 

You scoff, crossing your arms. “You’re the only one not dressed up, that’s embarrassing.”

You don’t know why it was irritating to you that he wasn’t in costume, even if you knew he wasn’t. You figured it was because you were trying to overpower your nervousness with different more consuming feelings, and much to your and Draco’s dismay, it worked. 

You weren’t nervous anymore, just irked.

“I’m staying like this, take it or leave it.”

You rolled your eyes, staring him down and hoping that he would change his mind but he wouldn’t. He was ridiculously stubborn.

In the heat of the moment of a fleeting thought, you decided that if he wasn’t going to be in costume, you would put him in one or at least a hint of one. You pulled your wand out, pointing it onto his striking white hair and with one easy spell, his hair was now a flaming vibrant red.

“Y/N!” He growled, running towards the closest thing that would show off his reflection where he let out a string of frantic curse words. “I look like a bloody Weasley.”

Your laughter caught him off guard, the sound ringing in his ears like music that spread warmth throughout him. You were clutching at your stomach with one hand and pointing at him with the other, giggling wildly at the sight of him with hair that did not suit him at all. He smiled to himself, your glee rubbing off on him abruptly that ate away quickly at his anger.

“You should’ve given me some ratty old hand-me-down robes and I’d look just like Ron,” he notes.

“That’s rude, Draco,” you say still laughing. He smirks, leaving the shiny statue of a knight in armor where he was checking his reflection and back over to you where you were still stuck in between doubling over in laughter and watching him. 

“I’m glad this is funny to you,” he muses. He begins digging into the pocket of his dress pants, taking your vulnerability as a chance for him to tap his wand to the top of your head and before you could react, your whole hair had turned a deep green.

Your laughter immediately ended as you ran towards the suit of armor, your grimacing reflection staring back at you with deep Slytherin green hair and a distorted Draco behind you doubling over just like you were moments ago.

“This looks,” you couldn’t even finish your sentence, the scowl on your face saying enough for you as you turned bitterly towards Draco. 

“Great?” He suggested, his guffawing subsiding into airy chuckles as you stood in front of him. Yours picked up again as you stared up at him, his striking bright red hair looking terribly unfamiliar on him. He was looking down at you, his heart jumping at the sight of you holding back your laughter. “You really do look dashing by the way.”

You swallowed thickly, thankful for the darkness that had settled around the castle and easily hid the scarlet brush appearing on your face. “But my hair is green.”

“Green is my favorite color.”

You opened your mouth to speak, your stomach and heart dropping simultaneously as your mind went completely blank. You pretended to not notice how he took a step closer to you to where he was almost fully against you and he pretended not to notice the way your lips were parted and how your chest was rising and falling a little too heavily as if you were nervous. It was game over for you when his gaze flickered down towards your lips and then back to your eyes, his head leaning down just the slightest like if he were waiting for you to meet him halfway. You were about to get closer to him, about to let your eyes close and give in to what you believed was him wanting to kiss you - but the world had other plans.

“Malfoy! There you are!” Someone boomed, clambering up the steps from the direction of the dungeons. You both jumped away from each other, your attention diverted to the Slytherin boy that interrupted the moment. “Malfoy come on, the party! And you can bring her too.”

You frowned when the boy came up to the two of you, clearly tipsy, dressed as a stereotypical vampire, and over-excited with the fact that Draco was out and willing to participate in Halloween festivities. It seemed like it bothered the now red-head when he looked to you and then back to the Slytherin boy with an apprehensive expression.

The boy, sensing the pause in the air, grabbed onto both you and Draco’s arms and started dragging the two of you towards the Slytherin common room where although the stone walls were thick, the sound of people celebrating inside were easily slipping past the stone slabs. He spoke the password out quickly and as soon as the entrance was open, you were both shoved inside into what looked like the largest party you had ever witnessed in all your years at Hogwarts. It was packed and filled with what looked like half of the school, or at least a huge majority of fifth-years and up. It was loud with music booming from a brand new wizarding-world radio in the middle of the room currently playing a song from the Weird Sisters. It smelled like a mixture of everyone’s perfumes and colognes and like firewhisky. The boy that pushed you two inside quickly passed you two cups of the very potent firewhisky before downing the third one he had in his hand and disappeared into the crowd while screaming for you to enjoy yourselves.

You both stood awkwardly away from the big and rowdy crowd, your drink clenched tightly in your hand against your chest and Draco swishing his around while it was still in the cup.

He wanted to up and run, thinking that someone was going to make a comment about his hair or about him being there, but no one seemed to pay attention to him or that he was there and in a way, he felt relieved by it and less tense by the second. 

“How in the bloody hell did we end up here?” You yelled over the music, putting a hand over his arm that was holding his drink up. You didn’t mean to, but you were glad you did because he glanced down at the contact with a small smile before looking back up to you.

“We got dragged here, remember!” He yelled back. 

“What?” 

“We got dragged here!”

“I can’t hear you!”

He rolled his eyes, bending down towards your ear to repeat himself one last time before you finally heard him over the mayhem around you.

“This is crazy!” You looked around the room, the sight of all the bodies and recklessness being too much as they were all more than likely drunk and oblivious to how stuffy and suffocating the room was becoming.

You looked down at the golden brown liquid sloshing around in your cup, wondering whether or not you should take it, but with the nervousness you felt coming back, it didn’t take you much longer to decide to down your cup and allow the liquid courage to seep into your veins. Draco watched you with amusement, chuckling to himself when you scrunched up your face in disgust from the burn he knew it caused as it went down your throat. He shook his head, deciding to drink his too and it was only minutes that passed before the drink was quickly becoming apparent in your systems. There was something about Firewhisky that always made its mark promptly and it really was courage in a bottle that you were glad was available to you in that moment because you were sure that in just a few minutes you were close to fainting.

You were beginning to sway faintly to the music, the rhythm sounding more loud but distant and more invigorating. You didn’t care anymore if anyone was watching or that Draco was observing you curiously just as he was beginning to lose all sense of holding himself back. He was inching closer to you, his head moving slightly to beat of the song and pure joy etched onto his features when your eyes met his.

“I keep forgetting I turned your hair red!” You yelled up to him, laughing loudly when he ran his hand through it. In your moment of confidence, you reached up and lightly ran your fingers over one of the front pieces hanging over his forehead. He didn’t stop you, his heart hammering against his chest from the drink and his overwhelming crush that was clouding all his senses. “Your hair is so soft!” 

He wanted to pin you up against the wall right then and there. You were peering up at him, just as you were before you were dragged inside by one of his Housemates and as soon as he was about to kiss you. 

“Do you want to get out of here?” He knew to bend down this time for you to hear him to which you responded with a fervent nod. You took his hand in yours, pulling him towards the exit of the common room and he let you lead him into the coldness of the dungeons that bit at his cheeks. It was a stark difference from the warmth inside, the crisp October air being more chilled than what either of you were expecting. It felt nice against your flushed skin and easier to breathe, especially once after the common room closed again and you could hear was muffled talking and music.

Neither of you were drunk and were still aware of pretty much everything, mostly the feelings stirring inside you both that was begging either of you to make a move towards the other. You were just a tad tipsy, and so was he, but it was enough for you to still enjoy the night without the initial awkwardness that oddly settled in between you. It was weird, considering how open and talkative you usually were with each other but there was something about the evening that made it feel like if you didn’t know each other.

“What now?” He asked you with a raised brow, his hand slipping into his pocket.

You smiled, an idea coming to your head that you knew he would love and you didn’t mind doing in the name of Halloween. “Do you want to go mess with people?”

He stared at you with widened eyes, “bloody hell, I love you.”

There was nothing that could have prepared you for his response, your own eyes widening in shock as you stared at him. He felt his face get hot in embarrassment, Merlin, he felt so stupid. He was mentally smacking himself in the head, desperately wishing he could bury himself seven feet under the Earth and staying there until the end of time.

He was about to play off what he said in a joking way, but for the second time that night he was interrupted by a couple that stumbled out of the common room drunkenly snogging each other’s faces off and wholly oblivious to you and Draco standing there in lingering panic. You jumped back into his arms when the couple staggered past you, almost knocking you over in the process of their makeout session and it annoyed you beyond belief. It annoyed you that they were in your way, annoyed that they interrupted you, annoyed that it wasn’t you in their position with the one you wanted. 

You dug your wand out of your pocket, flicking it their way as they rolled onto the wall, still in each other’s hold until the hex that flew from your wand hit the boy causing him to stagger back from the girl and holding his nose in pain. You heard Draco laugh from behind you when bats began to fly out from the boy’s nostrils while the girl screamed and ran away from one of the bats that swept down onto her head. The bats flew out of the dungeon and up the stairs with the boy struggling loudly the whole way up until his panicked screams were no longer heard.

“That was a perfect bat-bogey,” he looks at you proudly. “I feel bad for that poor bloke’s nose.”

“Thank you, thank you,” you bowed jokingly. 

When the sound of the door opened again, you both ran to hide behind a long drape against the wall that didn’t hide your shoes very well and pressed up against your bodies that’s shapes were no doubt visible from the opposite side.

You heard footsteps trail haphazardly down the corridor, their back seemingly facing you and as you both peeked your heads out from behind the drape, Draco nodded towards the boy and pointed his wand towards him. 

“Slugulus Eructo,” you heard him whisper and a stream of green light from his wand hit the back of the boy’s head and as he turned around in surprise while doubling over in pain, his hand clamped tightly over his mouth as slugs began to slip past the spaces between his fingers. When he stood up to run away, you noticed it was the same boy from earlier that stopped you two from the almost kiss and dragged you to the party. You let out a string of giggles as he ran away just like your last victims.

“This is so mean,” you chortle, leaning into him from behind the drape in an attempt to get closer to him. You were feeling bolder when he beamed down at you, feeling happy knowing that although the night was still young, he was having fun. “Thank you for coming with me tonight, I know you don’t like Halloween.” You say quietly.

“You finally convinced me, it’s not that bad,” he grins.

“Why’d you hate it in the first place?”

The question seemed to strike a nerve but the Firewhisky still flowing freely in his veins tore away easily at his defenses so instead of avoiding your question entirely like he usually would, he frowned and let his guard down.

“I don’t hate it,” he answers apprehensively. “My father never let me celebrate it. He never let me dress up. He told me respectable wizards don’t partake in holidays like these.”

His pout made your gut twist in sympathy, your hand instinctively going into his as you squeezed it reassuringly. “It’s never too late to start celebrating. Besides, I don’t see him here stopping you.”

He smiled for what felt like the hundredth time that night, his stained-red hair falling over his eyes as he looked down to his shoes.

“You have a point, darling.”

The door of the common room opened again and what you suspected to be another snogging couple to stumble out from the sound of heavy breathing and multiple shoes scuffling about was something completely different.

“Glad Malfoy stayed with someone else today.” It was Crabbe.

“Yeah, he never lets us go to these parties,” Goyle responds. “Go ahead and thank Y/L/N for freeing us, he fancies her like a fool.”

“Reckon we should go look for them?”

You figured Goyle nodded to him like the blathering idiot he was because in a few short seconds they were running away up the same steps everyone else had. 

You peered up slowly at Draco who was already gaping at you like a deer in headlights. He opened his mouth to speak, but no words came out. The gears in your brain were spinning wildly with happiness, the gossip hopefully being proven true when he didn’t try to deny it. You didn’t realize how close his face was to yours, cheeks tinged with pink from both the firewhisky and sudden shyness and his warm cinnamon breath fanning your face as he looked down at you.

“I can explain,” he finally said.

He didn’t need to; you placed your hands gently on his cheeks, pulling him impossibly closer to you and pressing your lips against his, catching him completely by surprise. His eyes were wide at first, his body rigid and his lips unmoving, but once it finally clicked that this was real and no longer a fantasy that played like a broken record in his head, his lips moved fervently against yours with the rest of his body following. His hands gripped your hips tightly, his fingers squeezing at the hem of your bottoms and his body pushing even further into yours.

Your bottom lip caught lightly in between his teeth as you reluctantly pulled away from him, the both of you breathing raggedly as you searched each other’s eyes.

“I feel the same,” you said softly. “Happy Halloween.”

He smashes his lips hungrily against yours again, his ego growing with each gasp of a delight that escapes your mouth as your hands roamed and tangled themselves into his magically colored strands.

“Very...happy...halloween,” he mutters against your lips in between kisses, a dazy smile adorning your face while he tightened his arms around you.

You just couldn’t wait until next year.

[itsagrimm]

Imperial!Tech 3

Summary: Tech's chip activated instead of Crosshairs so Tech is now an imperial commander tasked to serve the Empire at any cost. But is he willing to do so? And are you, dear Y/N as member of the experimental Elite Squad, willing to follow any order your commander Tech gives?

CN: self-harm, talk of death murder and war crimes, stalker behaviour, soldier life in a fascist state, power imbalance, overreaching behaviour, structural violence, sexually predatory behaviour and the likes, sensual overload, insomnia, references of drug abuse, depression and mental health issues, trauma

Imperial!tech X they*them Y/N reader, afab

Thanks a lot to @eyecandyeoz for your insight, feedback and thoughts. Check out their lovely blog!

I am sorry it took me so long. next part will be faster. I already started writing it.

And feel free to criticise especially concerning my use of CN and if the reader perspective is inclusive for you.

2800 words

Part 1 Part 2 Part 4

Tech collapsed into the chair as soon as Y/N had left the room. He was tired, so tired. He leaned back and put on his glasses. Him taking off his visual aids around Y/N was a degree of trust Tech rarely allowed. He was nearly blind without his glasses and the Kaminoans had considered terminating him for that. Tech was sure Y/N did not even know how much he had surrendered himself to Y/N and their touch. Their oh so soft touch. The memory of it was still fresh on his skin. It raced through is mind which for once was craving to match his body with the need to slow down and take a rest.

But it didn’t.

Y/N was pleasant to be around. Their touch was careful and considered. Only his brothers used to treat him like his. – His brothers, the former clone force 99, had left him behind after they refused to comply with order 66. Due to their divergence the inhibitor chip had not worked while he, Tech, had tried to kill the Jedi. – He had tried to kill a child. – The effect of the inhibitor chip was decreasing. His wound received on Bracca had an 84,743 % chance of damaging the inhibitor chip. But he should investigate further and get the chip out to stop any possible interference with his superior thought process. - Y/N was not aware of the inhibitor chips. He felt the need to tell them. Why? – The Havoc Marauder had not been mentioned on the imperial comm chatter for a while. – Echo was likely to take care of the ship now. – He should get some sustenance. He felt hunger. – Y/N – The Empire expected a degree of loyalty, uniformity, and compliance he was unsure he could deliver for long considering his diverging mind. – what would Hunter do? – the kaminoan proverb “yn’ja tha vaí m°O” was untranslatable into Basic but could be understood in Sit Bisti as “it needs tö be döne för the betterment öf äll”- The Empire was unlikely to grant him the freedom to find his brothers or in fact any freedom. – The canteen might serve Tiingilar tonight – He was a child slave destined to die in approximately 34,6 standard yearly rotations from old age if not sooner. – maybe the canteen will serve uj’alayi too. – Does Y/N speak Mando’an? He should enquire. – Of course, there will be no uj’alayi today. The Kaminoans did not allow sweet foods. – Y/N – How did the atmospheric controls work that ensured breathable air even for the highest floors of coruscanti buildings? - He knew why his brothers left him behind, but why did it feel so painful. – The empire was likely to kill him if he out served his usefulness for them. - He had tried to kill a child. He had killed several children on Onderon. How could he live with that? How could-

Tech forced his thoughts to stop by digging his fingers into his bloody scar.

The sharp pain felt soothing.

“Let’s consider making a list of the most pressing tasks for now.”

He starred at the ceiling.

“The Empire. It is the closest threat to my demise, but it can be my salvation if I am useful. Am I willing and capable to do that?”

His head started spinning again just at the thought of killing another child for the Empire. And yet serving the Empire gave him purpose he wasn’t sure he could muster on his own.

“Where are my brothers? How are they? How do I feel about them?”

Another unpleasant wave of thoughts and feelings washed over Tech before he continued.

“What is with the inhibitor chip inside my head?”

He nodded to himself. That was a rational and containable problem with fixed variables and clear answers. He felt comfortable with that question, pushing aside all the things he might have done due to being under the chips influence.

Only one question was left now.

“Why do I enjoy Y/N presence?”

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Ryloth had a warm and dusty climate during daytime. Y/N felt sweat dripping under the dark armour. The elite squad, including a new ES-03, was ordered to stand close by to Admiral Rampart, the highest imperial officer on Ryloth. And so, they had spent the last rotations following the Admiral around, doing tedious security work and presenting themselves like the Admirals favourite guard dogs to a public very much disliking their military presence. For once, even commander Tech looked annoyed about their not spec-ops appropriate services.

Today they were on the outlook. The Admiral wanted them scanning a large crowd for troublemakers and resistance fighters during a public announcement. Y/N couldn’t blame them. The Twi’lek of Ryloth had spent years fighting for their independence and spilled an ocean of blood on the dusty planet’s surface only to face an Empire now. Half a life ago Y/N would have hated themselves for being a soldier in service of a suppressing ruler. But now it was paid work.

“ES-01?”, Commander Tech brought Y/N back from their thoughts

“I am in position before the crowd.”

“ES-02?”

“Yes sir, I am on the building as you ordered.”

“ES-03?”

“Any nonimperial transmissions are being blocked now.”

“ES-04?”

“The war hawk is ready for take-off in case we need it.”

“Good. Do you register any noteworthy activity?

Y/N gazed through the crowd. They were mostly Twi’lek, waiting to hear from their leaders. All of them were in civilian clothing, none came with visible weapons.

“I can’t spot anything, sir.”

Tech said nothing. But Y/N could hear him type something.

“Analysing previous rebel fighter behaviour and strategies in similar situations they are likely to appear at these coordinates within the crowd today. I am sending you a list for you to especially pay attention to, ONCE.”, he finally said using the moniker the elite squad had given Y/N.

“Yes sir.”

Y/N looked at their holopad and started checking the coordinates commander Tech had calculated. At entry four they spotted their targets.

“Commander. I have a visual about 40 meters from my position, 10 o’clock. There are two fighters. Twi’lek. One female and one male passing. Shade of blue and orange.”

A moment everyone was silent.

“Confirmed.”, ES-02 stated.

Another moment passed.

“Observe them for now. Stay alert.”, Tech ordered before ending the transmission.

High above the Twi’lek senator started to talk. Y/N could not remember his name and paid little attention to his words. Unlike the Twi’lek.

“They are not happy.”, ES-02 stated flatly.

“Yeah thanks, I would not have noticed without you.”

“Always a pleasure to help out, ONCE.”

ES-02 was right. The crowd was angry. The imperial presence, the empty words of some disaffected politician, the fresh memories of the clone war. It was no surprise that the Twi’lek called out for their resistance leaders to speak.

“We want Syndulla! We want Syndulla!”, the crowd chanted.

A different voice from above started speaking. The crowd calmed down, not entirely happy but at least not a raging mob.

“At least we will not have to gun them down, now.”, ES-02 mumbled with a bitter voice.

“Would you really do that, two?”

“You know what they say, good soldiers follow orders, ONCE. And I intend to be one. Especially when I’m getting paid for it.”

XXXXXXXXXXX

Rampart was an asshole. He was a smug little administrator, willing to lie, back-stab and sacrifice whatever needed to achieve his goals. Rampart was the perfect general to handle a loaded situation like the one on Ryloth. And he was no fool.

Y/N hat noticed that he had kept both commander Tech and Howzer, the commanding clone trooper in charge of the regular clone troopers on Ryloth, close. A strategic move. Spec-ops commandos like the elite squad and regular commandos were in constant competition and mistrust to each other. Should one commander not deliver or even consider treason the other would interfere. And Rampart would always end up on the winning side of their clone infighting.

Y/N could here their arguing inside the office.

Commander Tech had ordered for Y/N to wait outside the office for new orders.

More arguing from the office was audible until finally Ramparts voice cut their bickering short.

The door opened and Howzer left. His expression was that of a practised reserved solider hiding his worries.

The door opened again, and commander Tech stepped outside of Ramparts office.

He looked tense.

Instead of a greeting or an order he just started walking. They followed him.

“Clone force 99 is here. But we are kept on a short leash. As always.”, Tech stated, “It is implausible to not use the best tools possible when confronted with a problem. Howzers troopers will not be able to beat them if necessary. Just like they won’t be able or unwilling to beat the Twi’lek should the need arise.”

Since Kamino the commander had started to share more of his thoughts with Y/N. All they had left to do was to listen and ask the right questions.

“Sir, you think Howzer will commit subordination?”

“There is a possibility of him and his men disagreeing with the new imperial leadership and it’s methods. Howzers unit has fought alongside the Twi’leks the past years. Bounds forged in the trenches can be stronger than loyalty to an administrator from Coruscant. But I require further data to assess the likelihood of treason.”

“What about clone force 99?”

“Their abilities and erratic strategies will be a challenge should we … no, should I have to face them.”

“So, we did not get the order to hunt them down?”

“No. Not yet.”

“And yet you already imply them as of importance.”

“It would be a grave strategic mistake to dismiss their presence.”

“So, what is the elite squad going to do about them? What are your orders, sir?”

Tech paused and adjusted his glasses.

“We are going to do nothing.”

“Sir!?”

“Don’t.” There was a warning in his voice. A signal to Y/N not to cross a line, invisible yet perceptible. He was after all a commander and Y/N just a soldier.

“I am sorry. I overstepped. You are in charge.”

He turned, stepped away and looked at Y/N. His eyes scrutinized them like a scientist inspecting a rare specimen of remarkable value.

They shivered.

His gaze was intriguing. It was painful to feel on display like that. And yet it was nearly intimate to be studied by Tech. Unsure if he would finally hit Y/N for their countless discretions or if he just contemplated their objections.

Finally, Tech nodded appeased and continued his walking without any further talk.

“What do you want us to do now, sir?”

Tech stopped.

“What do I want you to do now?”, Tech repeated as if the question had a different meaning to him than it had to Y/N.

He took out his holopad only to put it away again. He cleared his throat.

“I need you to stay alert. The situation is complicated. For now, get some sleep. The chances are below 4,65 % that there will be a significant development within the next two hours. After that I except the elite squad to be combat ready.”

“Yes sir.”

XXXXXXXXX

The Refresher room was empty. Most clones avoided the elite squad, and all the other members of their unit were taking a nap before the night shift which left Y/N to have the large washroom for themselves.

They signed.

Taking a shower and having some alone time to think and feel before finally taking a rest was what they needed.

Y/N started to strip out of the armour.

First, they took of the helmet, then the vambraces and shin guards before getting the shoulder pieces and lifting the heavy breast armour off before finally getting out of the abdomen armour. The black katarn fell to the floor, making loud echoing noises.

Y/N didn’t care. No one was to correct them on their improper handling of equipment here.

And as much as the armour was a useful necessity, it was a heavy burden in more than one way.

Their blacks followed and soon Y/N was standing under the refresher, naked and alone.

The water was hot and painful.

It was a welcome distraction to all the feelings of … well what exactly?

Y/N felt tears running down their face.

No, no, no. It’s just the refresher.

An uptight sob escaped Y/Ns throat. It was all so different from what they imagined. They had entered imperial service for the payment during a desperate time. And ended up witnessing murder after murder, committing murder.

Today they could have become accomplices to killing a crowd of innocent Twi’leks. And Y/N knew that they would have complied with the order to open fire on the civilians if given. How could they not? Surrounded by troopers like them, ordered around by heartless and calculating commanders.

Would Tech give a killing order like this?

Was he that heartless?

He had done so before.

He had killed so many times before their eyes and yet a piece of Y/N refused to see him as a murderer. In fact, they felt shameful about feeling and thinking about Tech – about their commanding officer – at all.

Y/N stopped fighting the tears and cried out loud.

Nobody would know about this.

Nobody would know about their doubt and vulnerability.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

As always sleep had been an unwilling friend to visit Tech. With a sigh he gave up and got up from the cot. As always, his mind was racing. He had tried the breathing techniques Crosshair taught him after a particular long stretch of insomnia, but it didn’t work.

And Tech wasn’t in the mood to experiment with the vast collection of sedatives to force his body to sleep right before possibly facing his brothers and definitely meeting admiral Rampart soon.

Work it was then.

His holopad listed only unchallenging administrative tasks.

The new Shuttle was in top shape.

His weapons were cleaned.

Tech had nothing to keep is overthinking brain in check.

Kriff, his life really was miserable. A never-ending effort to bringing his spiralling mind some peace.

A notification came in.

What a blessing.

Tech looked at the holopad again. It was just a reminder to check on his subordinates, to listen in on their private talks and vital signs.

The order from Imperial Command was an uncomfortable task but it was the best he had to do right now. And listing in on some snoring was better than listening to the elite squads talk like last time. At least it felt less overreaching.

He started with ES-04 and workout down from there. Four was in deep slumber, nothing of interest to note. ES-03 was still new and his sleep was restless, a few murmurs about his home planet and family escaped his lips. ES-02 was dreaming. His heartrate was accelerated. Tech turned his observation of, not interested in the rutting sounds of ES-02.

ES-01 was left. ONCE. Y/N. The thought of peeping into their private life was not only uncomfortable, but it also felt violent to strip Y/N of their peace and privacy.

And yet, Y/N was the only one Tech WANTED to know more about. He felt his desire to learn more about Y/N like a physical need, an addicting obsession Tech knew he needed to be careful with not to indulge.

Was their slumber peaceful and sweet?

Did they have dreams about home?

Or did they fight their nightmares in sleep just like they did awake?

He swallowed.

He was just following an order.

He will do nothing more.

He was just a good soldier.

Y/N wasn’t asleep. Their bucket was off and there were no vital signs coming of them. But the acoustic signal was working.

Y/N was somewhere with a lot of echoes and running water.

Tech felt himself blushing and getting hot.

They were in the shower.

It felt so right to listen in on Y/N. Tech felt bad about it.

The thought of water running down their bare and naked body made Techs mind slow like nothing ever before. The pleasure of a calm mind made him groan.

He hesitated. This was not okay. He shouldn’t listen. He shouldn’t imagine a subordinate like that. He hated that he had to. He hated that the Empire gave him order to do so. But more than that he hated himself for following that order so willingly.

He reached for the off button on his holopad.

A sob.

Was that Y/N? Were they crying?

Tech’s mind went from zero into overdrive. He needed to know who or whatever made you feel like crying. He would find out. And he would remove whatever it was from your life.

Part 4

[shreddedparchment]

A World of Our Own Pt.07

Decrepit Old Grump

9/29/2020

Pairing: Bucky x Reader          Word Count: 5,510

Warnings: language, smut, fluff, angst

A/N: Y’all, I have not edited this chapter much at all. I edited the first part and that’s about it. I’m too tired to edit and I may come back and edit later but I didn’t want to make y’all wait anymore as I already made y’all wait a long time before I came back to it. I’m sorry if it stinks. <3 If you happen to reblog, thanks so much for helping me spread my work. xoxo

Bucky is gutted.

He can feel the weight of his guilt growing as you sit there on the beach staring out at the crashing waves, sky turning an inky purple where it kisses the sea as the sun sets.

Your skin is enveloped by ocean wind, briny and thick it coats you with sea salt making you sticky with its humidity.

In this light, you’re glowing. A beauty. With tears slowly rolling across one cheek then the other as your sorrow wounds you repeatedly. Over and over you play it all in your head. Remembering the sounds of the chopper, the violent swish of tall grass and palms, gunpowder saturating the air as he lays on the ground and you panic over him pressing your hands against his wound.

Reaching up, he feels the spot, pressing his palm flat against the spot now healed and only a little sore.

The slump of your shoulders, the dead weight of your hands as they rest at your sides on the sand without moving, Bucky can see it all from where he stands by the hut.

You’ve given up. All hope gone. Not only are you stuck here on this island forever, but you were betrayed by Ryan.

Someone that Bucky suddenly wonders might have meant more to you than he realized. A real spark.

Of course, Bucky knows that you love him. It’s in your eyes, or it was before you were both permanently marooned here because of him—this is all his fault after all.

Still, maybe you cared more for Ryan than you were willing to admit? Could you have loved him too?

The two of you had been close. Despite your suspicions, your gentle guarding against him, could your spark have turned into real feelings?

Bucky hates this thing, this oozing pit of green sludge he knows is jealousy.

He knows he shouldn’t feel it. This is bigger than who anyone might be attached to emotionally or attracted to physically. This is life and death.

With being left here, all hopes of a real future are gone.

No jobs. No family. No friends. No children…Why had he gone and told you he wanted to have them with you?

How much must that be hurting you now?

Idiot.

Of course, with you hating him now, maybe the very thought of having kids with him is repulsive? He’d never been able to see himself as a father before you. Maybe this is all for the best? No matter how much it hurts to think.

He hesitates, waiting to see if you’ll turn or rise. You haven’t eaten all day and he knows its depression keeping you anchored here to this beach. A final depression. Dark and consuming.

However, he also knows that despite your giving up, even now your eyes scan the horizon for possible ships. Not in hope, merely habit.

When you continue not to move, he breathes in deep to gather his courage and moves towards you slowly.

You don’t even twitch at the sound of his approach.

You don’t even care that he’s there. Do you?

You’ve been so distant since Ryan left, sleeping in his now empty room on the floor. Bucky was willing to give you space at first.

How you must not be able to look at him…

The pit in his stomach widens, bringing with it painful aches of missing you pressed into his side. He misses the smell of your skin and the touch of your lips against his throat when you’d wake up in the middle of the night, searching for comfort.

He's lost you and he has only himself to blame.

However, whether you hate him or not, he can’t let you keep neglecting yourself the way you have. He can’t keep his distance anymore. Not completely.

He’s still responsible for keeping you alive, even more so with Ryan’s deception.

He'll force you if he has to. He needs you. Even if you can never love him again, he needs to see, hear, and know that you’re well.

~~~~~~~~~~

The hiss of the sand as he walks to you is soft with deliberate steps taken towards you then he stops.

Beside you, Bucky crouches and he penetrates your peripherals, filing you with wretched agony at the scowl in place on his beautiful face.

That face had smiled at you once. Kissed you. Assured you of safety. Loved you.

Now…how can he not despise you after your misguided trust?

How can he not hate you for your reckless friendship with that stupid man. You’re so angry at him you can’t even think his name.

You don’t want to remember him, but your heart will not let you forget.

You’d thought it so many times. So often. He’s a good man. A good father. He’s my friend and he’d never do anything to hurt us.

How very wrong you’d been. How foolish and trusting and generally stupid.

“Get up.” Bucky orders, his voice hard like it had once been so long ago when he’d dragged you up from the beach and through the trees where he’d put the fuselage.

You thought you’d heard the last of that voice. If he hates you, you suppose it makes sense that he’d adopt it once again. Why would he speak with love to you when he clearly can’t trust you or your judgement?

It hurts to hear his dislike of you, you can’t bear to see it to. So, you keep your eyes trained on the horizon, looking at nothing.

You don’t answer him either. This upsets him.

“You can’t keep ignoring me. And you can’t keep sitting here, crying your eyes out, not eating.” He huffs, gets to his feet and towers over you, legs spread slightly as he waits for you to look at him maybe, hands flexing in and out of fists.

What does he want from you? How can he expect you to respond to him when he’s like this after months of feeling his love?

He hadn’t even stopped you when you came back to the hut and told him you were going to sleep in the other room.

“Whatever you want.” He’d said in monotone, sitting stiff by the fire after you’d just cleaned, stitched, and dressed his wound.

He let you go; let you sleep away from him. You’d almost hoped he’d ask you back into your room, but he didn’t, and you weren’t bold enough to ask to come back when he so clearly didn’t want you.

“This isn’t helping anyone, Y/N. Get up.” Bucky chastises, driving a nail through your heart with every stern word. “Are you seriously just going to sit there?”

Your lips twitch tempted to shout at him to leave you alone. Very nearly you look up at him and yell at him to let you starve and die because that would leave him unburdened and free of you. But you picture it, his face, all scowly and angry. A hate in those steel ice eyes that had once overflowed with adoration and love.

No, you can’t look at him. It’ll break your heart more than it already does to wake up in the mornings without him at your side.

You mash your lips together, refusing to answer him and tilt your chin up in defiance.

It happens so quickly and you’re all of a sudden upside down, or…close to it.

Bucky swoops down and grabs you, tossing you over his shoulder and you’re not sure how he does it but he won’t let go and he doesn’t seem to have trouble lifting you—he pulled a literal piece of a plane inland so why would he?—as he turns and marches towards the tree line.

“Bucky! Let me go!” You scream, startled as you bounce against his back.

Trying desperately to find a hold on something, you push yourself against his waist but your hands keep slipping over his hips where you finally take hold of the loops of his jeans and use them to anchor yourself so that you’re not bobbing up and down as much.

“Bucky please-” You begin, an attempt to plead with him because this is the closest you’ve been to him in a month and you can smell him. The heat he radiates, just a bit hotter than normal, penetrates every fiber of clothing you’re wearing.

“I don’t know where the hell you got the idea that this behavior is alright. You want to starve yourself? You do it once I’m dead. Do you have any idea what you look like? What you smell like?” Bucky argues, strutting faster as he swerves between the trees.

The embarrassment you feel overwhelms you into silence because you don’t know what you look like or what you smell like. It must not be good if it’s made Bucky this angry. You feel shame suddenly that the man you love is seeing you like this.

For it to get so bad that he breaks whatever distance he’d wanted to keep between the two of you, it must be disgusting.

Your heart is suddenly thrumming for a whole new reason, and you’re very aware of how close to your butt Bucky’s face must be and with his enhanced senses, just how well he must be able to smell.

“Bucky put me down.” You squirm, pushing against him and pulling yourself up enough to grip his shoulders and hold yourself up a little straighter as the fear in you builds.

His arms only tighten around your legs and waist, refusing to loosen his grip as he continues to march forward.

“Bucky…” You push against him harder, a frenzy taking you over as you kick and squirm, hoping to maybe knock him off balance but instead he stops and suddenly, you’re weightless.

You fall for what feels like forever as your face is overtaken with shock. You see his frown as you fall, his eyes boring into yours until you hit water and sink down into cool green waters.

You gasp, swallowing water but quickly find your footing and push yourself up from the floor of what you realize is the bathing pool that Bucky had rebuilt closer to the hut.

You gasp and choke as you surface, eyes wide with panic as you push the water out of your face and try to catch your breath.

“You wanna let yourself fall apart, you do it on the other side of the island where I can’t watch you do it, because I won’t sit here and put up with it, Y/N. I can’t.” Bucky points at you, his finger firm.

“What the fuck, Bucky?!” You gasp, still wheezing from swallowing water.

“I get that this isn’t exactly an ideal situation.” He starts, pacing a step away from you before coming right back up to the lip of that pool and presses his hand to his chest. “I’m not innocent. I’ve been paying for the crimes I’ve committed ever since Steve pulled me back from the brink and I know that I’ve done a lot of wrong since. Getting you stranded here on this island…if I could take it back, I would. If I could fix it so that you weren’t on that plane when they blew it up, I would do it in a heartbeat.

“I get that this is my fault. I understand that them wanting me dead has put you in this fucked up situation, stuck here with no possible escape, and hate me if you want to. That’s fine, I’m used to it. I get it if you never want to speak to me again, but please stop neglecting yourself. If you want to punish me, I’ll think of some other way for you to do it, but please…please don’t make me the reason you die here because I couldn’t stand it, Y/N. I’ll find you a way off of this place.

“I’ll build a raft or a bigger fire or…I’ll think of something, just…I need you to eat something. I need you to take care of yourself. I need you to care. Don’t let what I did hurt you more than I already have.

“I’ll fix this. I promise. Alright?” He’s still fierce in his words, but slowly his anger has receded into begging.

Before you stands a desperate man, asking you to keep living and all you can think about is one thing.

“I…” You swallow hard, fighting the knots in your stomach and the aching squeeze of your heart as a fleeting hope takes shine within it. “I don’t hate you, Bucky.”

The words are mostly air, still too stunned by his speech and certain parts of it in particular to catch your breath fully from the sudden dunk into very cool water.

He takes a breath, staring at you as you look at his feet, shaking your head before finally meeting his eyes.

You blink against the water still dripping down from your hair into them and wipe at the drops that get trapped in your lashes.

“What?” He asks, his own voice rising in pitch in confusion.

“I don’t hate you.” You repeat, this time strongly with a voice so clear that the birds making nest for the night go quiet. “I could never hate you. How could you even think that?”

You lick your lips, wiping more water away from you face while Bucky stares at you, blinking as he processes the words you’ve spoken. It’s clear in his expression the flurry of thoughts that must be speeding through his mind.

“But you moved out of ro-” He begins, but you don’t let him finish, wrapping your arms around yourself to battle the chill that’s begun to set in.

“Because I thought that you were angry with me…because I trusted him. I kept insisting that he was our friend and I was so…so stupid for believing him.” Your voice breaks, pent up sorrow breaking through as you look away from him because you can’t bear to see the look of disappointment on his face when you admit your crimes.

He says nothing.

“If I’d been more careful maybe we might have noticed something sooner? If I hadn’t been so won over by the story of his kid or the way that he pretended to be nice, I’m sorry, Bucky. I’m sorry that I didn’t-”

There’s a splash and you blink against the rush of water. You have no time to search for the source because he’s there, in front of you, his hands wiping away the water from your cheeks.

He presses himself so close that there isn’t a part of you that isn’t touching him. You tilt your head to look at him, meet his eye and see a desperation in his own as his lips curl into a small sad smile. His eyes are soft, his brow is raised at the center as he drinks in your own expression of surprise.

“You really don’t hate me?” He wonders, voice soft and sweet and full of fading anguish.

“No.” You nearly sob, shaking your head as much as you can in his vice-like hold. “I could never hate you, Bucky. I’ve told you before. You’re my hero. My savior in more ways than one stupid. I love you.”

He closes the distance between you, fierce hungry lips painfully pressed to yours until he gets his fill then pulls back to sweep more water away from your cheeks.

“I’m not angry.” He whispers, reaching down to wrap his right arm around you. “I could never be angry with you for seeing the good in people. How can I when that’s what made you dumb enough to love me?”

You laugh, ecstatic and slightly insulted. “Did you just call me dumb?”

“Fuck yeah, I did.” Bucky shakes his head. “Stupid, lovable, dummy. You’re a hothead too. I hate that in a woman.”

His teasing fills your belly with butterflies and sweet warm tumbles.

You laugh again, then reach behind his neck to pull him down for another kiss, this time holding it for longer as you let your lips meld with his. Soft and fluid as a month’s worth of insecurity washes away in the water of the pool.

He sighs, angling your head with his metal hand as he parts his own lips and the heat of his breath parts your own. He deepens the kiss and you welcome him, a small whimper breaking the silence as you melt against his chest.

He pulls back to tilt his head the other way, “Will you come sleep in our bed now?” He asks, before meeting your lips again.

You nod.

“Mmmph.” He moans, pushing you back until you hit the pool’s wall.

He nudges your legs open and you lift yourself easily in the water and wrap them around his waist as he presses in against you, flesh hand sliding down to your bottom to grab a firm hold.

You break the kiss, gasping as his lips drift to your neck until a sudden flash draws your eyes upwards followed by a sudden boom.

Bucky pulls back, staring up at the sky with you.

“This’ll hit in half an hour.” Bucky guesses, and you know it might hit sooner.

“Bad?” You wonder, dropping back down to your feet as you continue to stare at the canopy as it begins to sway more strongly as the wind picks up.

“Bad enough.” Bucky frowns. “I need to go get the tools secured in the hut and check the nets.”

“I’ll help.” You offer and begin to move around him, but he turns back to you, planting you firmly against the wall.

“No. I wasn’t lying when I said you need a bath. You don’t stink as bad as I made it seem, but you haven’t been taking care of yourself, kitten. I’m not okay with what.” He’s stern again but this time, you can’t blame him.

“I’m sorry.” You allow, feeling shame once again for your inability to be strong through this.

“Don’t be.” He shakes his head. “This isn’t your fault. Or mine. We’re just here and we lost our way for a bit. I should have spoken up sooner. We’ll do better, right?”

You nod, eager to move on from this hiccup. “I’ll do better.”

“We’ll do better, Y/N.” He corrects, reaching up to caress your head. “There should still be some soap in the basket. I’ll bring you a change of clothes.”

He pulls himself out of the pool, untying the basket where you keep the soap you’d made up in the branches of a tree away from where animals might find them. He places it beside the edge and as another flash fills the sky, he hurries back towards the beach to prepare for the coming storm.

~~~~~~~~~~

The hut shakes, a charge fills the air, and you sit up gasping. Clutching the thing almost worn blanket close, you turn your head this way and that, searching for the chopper.

“Hey, it’s okay.” Warm arms wrap around your shoulders, pull you closer as the thunder rumbles into nothing.

The rain is still pelting the outside of the hut, a constant stream of white noise as rain and wind thrash the beach and your island home.

The storm has gotten worse over the past few hours, the waves are loud and chaotic, rising higher than they’ve risen since you’ve been here. The beach and campfire where you usually sit and cook are under water.

Bucky building the hut on stilts has paid off and you curl into him as he drags you back down to lay in the plane cushion bed.

“It’s alright, it’s just the storm.” He promises, still half asleep.

You turn towards him, wrapping your arms around him, placing your palm flat against his chest.

“The storm.” You repeat, still mostly asleep yourself.

As your heart begins to slow, you reach up to trace the shape of his ear, slipping your hands up into his hair you pull him down for a kiss.

He gives it to you, his lips gentle and coaxing as he responds eagerly to the attention.

“Bucky…” You fret, thunder overhead shaking the hut once more as lightning flashes and illuminates the inside of the room.

The sky is a black void of weather, scary and unyielding as mother nature asserts her dominance over both your lives.

“It’s okay…” He promises, traces the curve of your body from hip to shoulder, then back down to your hip.

You snuggle closer, pulling him down for another kiss and this one he holds, his tongue slipping past your lips.

Toes curling, you sigh, pushing yourself up over him for only a second before he rolls you onto your back.

Already mostly naked, Bucky pushes his briefs down then pulls your panties aside and without hesitation pushes into you, stretching your heated cunt with his thick throbbing cock.

Both of you freeze, feeling each other for the first time as the sky flashes and thunders.

His mouth finds yours swallowing your moan as you both give in consequences be damned because you’re both here. You’re stuck, deserted, with no hope of rescue and you love him so much.

He thrusts into you, burying himself deep.

It’s a hazy dream, the pleasure his body pulls from you, until he’s pushing your legs open wide and you obey because you want him closer, deeper.

Suddenly the world is crystal clear. Sharp and detailed and you can feel the tip of his cock sliding against the walls of your cunt, prodding and sliding making your legs quiver and flex.

“More…” You beg, hands raking against taut shoulders, tracing cool metal. “…Bucky…”

He pushes himself onto his knees, angling himself up further until he’s mounted you and you’re trapped in the cage of his arms.

He grunts, driving you mad with the sounds he’s making because they’re better than anything you could have dreamt up.

You pull him down until he’s got his full weight on you, crushing you down as his hips continue to thrust.

The wind grows more violent, the rain falls harder. The lightning feels endless and the thunder never stops but you hear none of it as Bucky’s lips kiss your neck, his tongue tracing circles before his teeth bite into your throat.

The heat in your belly swells over, down into your hips and pelvis and your body is overwhelmed with pleasure. Toes curled, arms locked around Bucky’s shoulders, you stop breathing.

Bucky keeps pumping, drilling into you faster as he chases his own release then he stutters, hips clapping against your thighs as he spills into you, grunting with every thrust.

He doesn’t stop. He won’t stop. Even when he’s finished, his lips trail across your skin, searching for more.

He reaches down and pushes the bottom of your shirt all the way up, exposing one breast which he takes into his mouth, nibbling gently.

“More?” He checks, moving to the other, never once pulling away.

“Never stop.” You hope, pushing him until he’s on his back.

As you settle over him, hands pressed against his chest, he licks his lips and traces your sides. Stopping at your hips, he licks his lips in anticipation.

~~~~~~~~~~

“Bucky!” You call, searching the beach in the distance, too tired to walk all the way out to the nets.

“Yeah?” He calls back, his shout distant enough that you know he’s in the water just beyond the rocks.

“Lunch is ready. Come eat before it gets cold.”

“Let me just finish with this trap.”

“Okay but hurry up.” You relent, knowing that he won’t come until he’s satisfied.

You move the fish away from the flame, careful and quick as they’re hot. Placing the extras on one of the trays you’d salvaged way back when from the plane, you move to take your usual seat beside the fire.

Ten months.

It’s been ten months of being stranded on the island. The two made bearable by the fact that Ryan’s betrayal had helped you and Bucky push into a new stage of intimacy.

You have sex often. Maybe not everyday as sometimes you’re both too exhausted to do more than sleep, but often enough that you’ve begun to wonder if you’ve made the right choice to give in.

There is no doubt in your mind that should a baby come, you and the child would be safe and well kept with Bucky at your side. Although the fear still lingers that something could go wrong, with either you or the baby, you’re sure that if you weren’t around to care for it, Bucky would do an amazing job as protector and keeper.

He doesn’t talk about it, but you know he, like you, wonders.

You’d stopped having regular periods well before you and Bucky began to have sex, so there would be no real way for you to know until you got big enough to show.

With a sigh, you push these thoughts away. This worry is only one of many and there are others much more important than a possible child.

With the storms getting worse, and hurricane season almost over, Bucky is sure that the island will see one more storm before it’s really over.

The idea of being caught in more scary weather fills your tummy with big bats and you want to forget the worry almost as soon as you remember it.

You unwrap your fish and pull it apart, careful to avoid the bones as you pick it to pieces and begin to eat.

You’re almost halfway through when Bucky finally settles in across from you, sighing with relief as he smiles and reaches for his plate.

“Everything good with the nets?” You check, mouth full of fish.

“Yeah, they’re fine. Just had to cast it out a little farther. Season’s changing so we might have to look for new fishing spots.” He explains and tears into his fish hungrily.

“We need to find more boar.” You sigh, pulling more bones from your fish. “We need the protein.”

He meets your gaze, blinking slowly as he watches you eat before nodding.

Neither of you has to vocalize your worry about protein and your health in case of a pregnancy.

“I think I spotted some yuca root on the far side of the island too. Some nopal and jícama too. We’ve been eating a lot of fruit; we’ll need to mix in some vegetables…for…it’ll be good for you.” He smiles, trying so hard to be relaxed.

“Vegetables…” You lament, moaning with desire for the long-forgotten tastes.

“I know. I’d love some good french fries.”

“Oh my-why would you bring up french fries?!”

Bucky chuckles. “Sorry. Just popped in there.”

Nervously, you lick your lips of the flavor of fish and set aside your leaf and tray.

“Bucky?”

“Yeah?” He doesn’t look up, focused instead on his food.

“We should make plans, just in case.”

“Not yet.” He sighs, the corners of his mouth curving down.

“We need to.”

“Not yet.” He insists.

“Bucky.” You press.

“Damn it, Y/N,” He looks up at you, shaking his head in resistance. “Not yet.”

“We have to, babe.” You smile sadly, shrugging your shoulders. “You may not want to think about it, but we have to. We gave in and with that comes the chance that the two of us could turn into three and we can’t afford to put this off. If something happens to me while I’m giving birth-”

“Okay!” He cuts you off, nodding. His eyes a little wild as he thinks quicky. “I agree, we need to make plans, but right now I’m not worried about what could happen in months. I need to find the caves Ryan was talking about and take some rations over there so that we have somewhere to go when this hurricane inevitably hits.”

“It might not come.” You argue, more hopeful than right.

“It will.” Bucky assures you. “And I can’t afford to get distracted until we’ve gotten all that setup. We will have this conversation just not yet. Okay? I know you’re worried. So am I.”

“And excited?” You check, a little timidly because yes, although you’re worried, you can’t deny the appeal that having Bucky’s baby holds.

A little one running around that looks like him? Sounds like him? The baby could very well look like you and sound like you too and that wouldn’t be so bad, but a little Bucky is too appealing not to hope for.

Bucky leans towards you, reaching to place his hand over yours as his eyes soften. “Of course, kitten. Yes, I’m excited too. It would be much sooner than I was hoping but I meant it when I said that I wanted this with you.”

Relief washes over you and you’re able to relax a little.

“But we’ll have time for that after I make sure I have somewhere safe for us to go.” He takes his hand back, focusing on his food once again.

You allow him to eat in silence for a bit, leaning back against the palm log as you watch the horizon with unfocused eyes.

A terrible thought has been growing in your mind for a while now. A thought you’ve been too scared to speak aloud for fear of robbing Bucky of his hope. The more determined he gets though you know you can’t avoid it any longer.

“Bucky?”

“Hm?”

“Bucky what if he lied about that too?” You try to subdue your fear as best you can, but you know you can’t hide it all. “What if he was dropped off on the island at some point and then came and joined us as the co-pilot-”

No, wait. You do remember seeing him on the plane though. He really was the co-pilot. Still…

“What if he jumped out and got picked up and then sent back to make sure you were dead? What if there are no caves? What if there’s nowhere safe on the island to sit through a stronger hurricane than the one when we crashed here?”

“The mountains on the other side of the island are large and they go on for almost the entire shoreline. Even if he made up his caves, I’m sure there are some. There has to be.” Bucky insists, determination invigorating his voice. “I’ll find us somewhere safe, kitten. I promise.”

“You’ve been promising me somewhere safe since we landed here. I’m starting to think you mean it.” You tease and hope it’s enough to draw a smile after the cloud you just summoned.

Lucky you, it works, and Bucky huffs a small laugh.

“I love you.” He tells you, voice low and soft.

“I love you, too.”

As the two of you stupidly get lost in each other’s eyes, the sudden sound of a voice echoes in the heated air.

You can’t make out what it says, but it’s clear though distant.

Both your faces are overcome with confusion as you continue to stare at each other.

“What was that?” You wonder, and Bucky shakes his head.

The voice is louder this time, still unintelligible but still clear enough to be a voice.

Bucky suddenly bolts up, turning and running down along the beach from where he’d come.

“Bucky?” You hurry up, chasing after him.

He stops suddenly and squints towards the rocks that jut out into the water blocking the side of the island where you have the nets set up.

“What is it?” You gasp, tired from the run to keep up.

“Shh.” Bucky orders and you swallow hard, trying desperately to quiet your breathing.

“Can anyone hear me?” The voice says, deep and easy. “I am looking for a decrepit old man, probably grumpy. Most definitely surly and usually wearing a frown. Long hair. Needs a cut. Worse looking than me.”

From around the rocks comes a boat, a small vessel meant to travel from a larger ship to land. On it is a whole crew of marines. At the bow holding a steel gray megaphone to his lips is a handsome black man, sturdily built wearing a familiar red and gray suit.

“Bucky…” You gasp, your heart nearly seizing as your brain tries to process the fact that there is a boat full of soldiers right offshore.

“Sam?” Bucky whispers, too shocked to speak any louder.

As this Sam spots the two of you, he breaks into a smile and drops the megaphone to slap against his thigh. He’s ecstatic to see Bucky and when he lifts the megaphone back to his mouth, he laughs once.

“You are a pain in my ass, Barnes.” Sam says, smirking at him from the boat as it stops far enough out that it’ll be an easy swim to reach them. “Why am I always looking for you and why can’t you make it easier? I’m putting a chip in your ass as soon as we get back home.”

[rosyl-stuff]

The Hate Between Us

Paring: Jeong Yunho (Ateez) x reader

Genre: forbidden love, fantasy, The Little Mermaid inspired (not really a retelling), a bit angsty, a bit fluffy

Warnings: violence (nothing too graphic)

Word Count: 1.9k (7-8 minutes reading time)

Synopsis: You are a siren who needs to rip out the hearts of humans as a tribute to the Sea Queen. Yunho is a pirate who hunts sirens. Will you two find your happily ever after?

It was a peaceful night. When you broke through the surface of the water, you were not immediately blinded by the sun, so you could spot Yunho straight away. He was standing up to his ankles in the water and wandering around waiting for you.

When your paths first crossed, it was anything but peaceful. You were on the lookout for prey because the Sea Queen was expecting tribute again. Every year, each siren had to prove their loyalty by bringing her a heart of a human. It was the only way to get recognition in your world. Everything else did not matter. Love did not exist for heartless monsters. From a young age, you tore out the hearts of sailors, pirates and sometimes princes who were on adventures so that the sea queen would recognise you as worthy.

Yunho was a pirate. But not just any pirate. He was part of a notorious siren hunter crew. They were known for their swift and brutal style. None of the captured Sirens ever came back alive. A few were given as trophies and compensation for old crimes to the various royal houses of humans. There they were kept in small pools of water and put on display. Sometimes they were even hunted for fun in those pools. Those that were not given away alive died on the ship while their scales were removed. Siren scales have healing properties for humans and were a much sought-after commodity for which people were willing to pay a lot. This is how Yunho and his crew earned their living.

However, they were not the only ones with this business idea. Other pirates quickly followed suit and, pirate fights in waters where sirens frequented became more common. One of these fights took place when you were actually looking for prey. Both crews were too busy fighting each other to notice you. It was an easy game for you. The first pirate to fall into the water, you would grab and rip out his heart before they drowned. You didn't have to wait long until the first one fell into the water. He tried to swim but wasn't very good at it. There was also a big gash on his side. You quickly swam to him and pulled him further into the depths. When you saw his face for the first time, you hesitated. Most people looked at you with love because they were still under the spell of your singing. But he only looked at you curiously. He didn't seem to be afraid either. His face was angelic and, you couldn't help but look at him a little longer. You had hesitated too long because the next moment a harpoon shot only a few centimetres past you. One of the pirates Yunho was fighting against had followed you into the water. He could swim and dive well and was moving towards you. Without giving it a second thought, you swam away with Yunho in tow. He had run out of air by then and fainted. You laid his motionless body on a rock. You didn't want to risk getting caught by any of the pirates and decided to go somewhere else to get your heart for the sea queen, so you abandoned him there.

Luckily for him, his crew found him quickly and, he survived. The lack of oxygen had made him forget what exactly had saved him. He could only remember your face, but he kept it to himself, even though he dreamt of you every night.

As you still did not bring a heart to the sea queen, you were pressed for time and became more careless. So it happened that you were caught in a net and pulled out of the water onto a ship. You tugged at the net, but no matter what you did, it wouldn't let up. When the net was pulled off your head, you saw his face a second time. He recognised you and, you could see his inner conflict in his eyes. You stopped struggling and wondered if it would help to beg him. He glanced over his shoulder at his comrades. Then he held his hand in front of your face. "I know I owe you one. Now bite my hand and then get off the boat and swim as far away as you can." You hesitated while Yunho gave you an encouraging nod. He moved his hand gently to your lips. Then you bit gently into it. "Harder!" he growled, "It's supposed to be realistic!" You obeyed and, his face contorted in pain. Then he cried out and at the same time pushed you back into the water. You swam away as fast as you could. You tasted his blood for days to come and, his face wouldn't let you go now either. You had heard stories of soul mates. Was he perhaps yours?

So you couldn't help but stay close to the ship all the time. Never too close because Yunho probably wouldn't help you a second time. One night he sat alone on the deck and stared into the far distance of the ocean. Your heart longed to see his face. So you carefully swam closer, fervently hoping that no one was sitting by the radar and that everyone else was asleep. Yunho noticed you embarrassingly early. He grinned at you: "Can't stay away from me, I guess."

So you spent almost every night together. Except when you had to fetch a heart, then you disappeared for a while. In the beginning, Yunho was sure that one day you would get his heart and that you just enjoyed playing with your prey. But you also doubted Yunho's sincerity. After all, you saw him regularly dragging sirens out of the water with his crew and killing them. At any time, one of you could become the victim of the other. Nevertheless, you began to trust each other. Yunho was actually a very gentle person and, his brutal way of life affected him more than he wanted to admit to his crew and especially his captain. It was different with you because he could tell you everything without being judged or called weak. You simply listened and comforted him. You were fascinated by his stories and loved to listen to him. But what you liked most was that he simply liked you. You didn't have to prove yourself to be noticed by him. When you were together, it was just the both of you and not the suffering your species caused each other.

But it was not only the hatred of your species that kept you apart. Yunho had no fin, could not breathe underwater and was a terrible swimmer, even if he tried to get better. You had no legs and couldn't move at all on land. Every time Yunho's ship docked at a port, you met in a small, hidden bay. There you could be closest to each other and, the risk of being caught was lowest.

Tonight was one of those nights. You watch Yunho pacing back and forth. Sometimes you wondered what your legs would look like. Would they be as long as Yunho's or be more on the short side? Would you have muscular thighs like him or, would they be thick or thin like other humans? Sometimes it was the other way round and, you wondered what his tail fin would look like. What colour would it be?

Yunho spotted you and in an instant, a grin spread across his face. He got deeper into the water. You swam towards him. When Yunho was waist-deep in the water, you reached him. Without effort, he grabbed your waist and pulled you out of the water so that you were at eye level. You wrapped your arms around your neck and smiled at him.

"Hi love!" he murmured and put his lips on yours.

It was a very loving kiss.

"I missed you!" you breathed against his lips.

"I missed you too!" he murmured and gave you another quick kiss.

You gently stroked his hair and couldn't really stop grinning. Yunho noticed this and asked,

"Did something good happen today?"

You nodded, yet you hesitated. Yunho wanted you to be careful because you would be executed immediately if anyone found out about you. Yunho was close friends with his crew and the captain. They might be angry or disappointed, but they probably wouldn't kill him. Cautious was not a quality you would use to describe yourself. Especially when it came to finding a solution to your problem.

"Now tell me! What have you done?"

"I was in the forbidden library!"

Yunho sighed. As the name suggested, no one but the Sea Queen was allowed to enter the library. But you had managed to bribe one of the guards to let you in. You took your time and looked for a way for you and Yunho to be together.

"Don't worry, everything went well," you said to reassure Yunho.

"And what if it hadn't gone well? Y/N, you have to stop putting yourself in danger like this."

You pouted. Yunho sighed and gave you another kiss.

"Go on, spit it out! What have you found out?"

You gave him a big smile and, he couldn't help but smile right back at you.

“I found a way to make a potion. The potion will give me legs,” you said excitedly.

Yunho looked at you surprised: “Really? What about the ingredients? Are we able to get them without dying?”

You nodded: "Yes, most of them grow on the land, but with your help, it should be no problem!"

Yunho still looked sceptical.

“Come on, Yunho. Please be happy about it. It won't hurt trying it. None of the ingredients is poisonous."

"I'm just worried. There has to be a catch. I highly doubt a potion will just give legs with no side effects."

And he was right. You tried to hide it, but Yunho noticed it right away. He gave you a soft kiss on the cheek as you avoided eye contact.

“What is the side effect?” he asked you softly.

“Please let us try anyway.”

“Tell me first!” Yunho demanded.

You knew arguing wouldn’t bring you anywhere, so you sighed and said: “If I get my legs, every step I take will feel like I’m walking on broken glass.”

You breathed out audibly and pulled you closer to him.

“You know that will be very painful?" he asked.

You just nodded, even if you have never felt how a piece of glass cute into your body. But it can’t be worse than the pain you felt in your heart when you and Yunho are not together.

“I don’t think I can let you do that!” he mumbled into your hair.

“Please,” you begged, “I don’t want to be separated from you any longer. I want to be together with you.”

“You know that I want that as well. I just don’t want you to suffer the rest of your life," he said with a sigh, "Let me think about it, ok?"

You nodded and gave him a feverish kiss. The discussion was over for now and, you both concentrated on giving each other all the love you could.

Maybe you would find another way to be together. Find a way to bring peace to your species. Maybe you are the start of a change. Maybe you find your happily ever after or, you end up in a tragic love story.

Or you are just another story for hopeless romantics?

A/N: Hope you enjoyed this one. If you liked the concept, I would recommend reading "To Kill A Kingdom" by Alexandra Christo.

[hammeredalcoholic]

my only friend

kira yoshikage / reader ;

rating: mature, no 18+ content yet ; kira & reader are portrayed as 18 years old

hey my fellow gamers, i realized that i did not post this on tumblr yet. here is chapter 1 to this fic! it’s also cross posted on ao3 here.

here is a spotify playlist to go with this fic.

"believe the lies that people tell you you've lost your battle and vines and tiny thorns inside your wound,"

Kira made a mistake. He came to you, begging for you to run away with him.

You did.

chapter 2

The stars glittered against the deep blue of the night sky, reflecting softly against the stark ocean waves that licked against the calm beach. It felt so serene-- so gentle, and still. Like time had stopped or slowed, your breath just barely ghosting over your lips. 

It was nice.

Metal pressed against your back, warmed up by your body heat, stiff and hard but yet still so soft. It felt almost too good to be true-- a beautiful night like this. No kids and families stomping all over the delicate sand, interrupting the sound of the waves crashing against rocks. 

A small sigh lifted you from your thoughts. 

Glancing over, you carefully eyed your companion. His blonde hair tousled and glowing in the moonlight-- ice blue eyes cast out against the sea. He was truly something of beauty himself, had you not known what he was really capable of. 

“What’s on your mind?” The words fell from your mouth without a second thought, almost dropping to a whisper. He shook his head lightly, his eyes being torn away from the water to look at you. 

Such a pretty shade of blue. Pale and glistening-- like a fresh dew on the first day of spring. 

A light drizzle against hard asphalt, pooling and shining-- only to be gone in a second’s notice.

“Just-- A lot on my mind.” Ah, so it’s like that.

Yoshikage never dared to tell you what he was thinking upfront. He didn’t want to seem-- vulnerable? Is that the right word? Weak. Docile. Bound to break. It didn’t seem fair. You were always so-- Strong. Incredible. Someone to look up to. Someone who could clean up his mess.

Sighing softly in response, you leaned back against the cool glass of the windshield. Shuffling through your pocket, you pulled out some cigarettes and a lighter you had managed to pick up from the corner store, thanks to Killer Queen. 

Carefully snatching one out of the pack, you quickly lit it and took a long drag. The smoke filled your lungs, heavy and harsh, causing a small shiver to run down your spine. Nicotine was the best way to end a long day. 

“Those are awful for you.” Yoshikage’s words drifted to your ears, and you blew the smoke in his direction. He flinched and coughed, using his hand to try and maneuver the offending cloud away from him. “Hey! That was uncalled for.” 

“Don’t tell me things I already know, Yoshi.” Your tone dripped with sarcasm, and you shot him a sly grin. “Besides, can’t I have a little break once in a while?” As soon as the words left your lips, Yoshikage slumped in his spot. 

“Where are we going to stay tonight?” The question drifted to your ears, his voice soft and oh so gentle. You shifted your leg up to press against your chest, letting your arm wrap around it. “I dunno. I saw a motel back in town, looked decently cheap.” 

Your partner nodded his head in agreement. “Looked kinda dirty, though.” You had to hold back a laugh at his comment, bringing your cigarette up to take another drag instead. “We’ll be fine. Killer Queen can always just kill any unsavory guests we encounter.”

His eyes drifted back out to the ocean, and his hands twitched in his lap. “I can feel another urge coming on.” Blinking at his words, you let your head sit on your knee, nursing the smoke you had in between your fingers. “Think you can wait until tomorrow?” You asked calmly. 

Yoshikage nodded quickly, bringing a hand up to run through his hair, pulling his bangs out of his eyes. “Yeah. I could also use a hair cut.” Grinning against the fabric of your jeans, you laughed. “I’m sure we could find a barber shop. Unless you want me to do it.” 

His eyes opened wide, and he snapped his head over to you. “I’d never let you near my neck with a pair of scissors.” You laughed at his comment, shaking your head just slightly. Taking a final drag from your cigarette, you put it out against the side of the rusty car. 

“Are you ready to head that way then?” 

“Yeah. Let’s go.” 

The drive to the motel was quiet, much like all of the other drives you took together. The radio softly played in the background-- some upbeat song that you couldn’t really catch the lyrics to, but it seemed like Yoshikage enjoyed it. His fingers were tapping against the passenger side door, in tune with the beat. 

You tried to remember where the motel was, only catching a glance of it earlier. It was on the main road through the town, so it wasn’t hard-- ah. There’s the sign. 

Pulling the car into the parking lot, you parked in a lane that was a decent amount away from the lobby. Yoshikage looked up from his seat, glancing at you. He knew what to do-- it was always like this. Opening the car door and stepping out, he began to slowly walk towards the building.

The air was blowing softly, causing a shiver to run across his arms. Pulling the sleeves of his sweater down, he clutched them to his chest. It was definitely a lot cooler now than it was at the beach. Reaching the door fairly quickly, he pulled it open and stepped inside the dimly lit room.

The man sitting at the counter was elderly-- heavy set, reading some sort of newspaper, his glasses practically falling off his nose. Yoshikage cleared his throat softly, moving closer to the desk. “Excuse me,” He stated quietly, “Do you have a restroom open to the public?” 

As soon as the words left his mouth, Killer Queen materialized behind the man. The stand’s eyes were trained on the set of keys hung up on the wall, trying to decide which one it would take. The elderly man barely looked up from his paper, blinking slowly at Yoshikage. 

“Did you not read the sign on the door?” His voice was harsh, somewhat irritated. It made the younger boy’s nerves tingle, and his hands twitch in his sleeves. “Oh- I suppose I must have missed it,” Yoshikage answered, trying hard not to let his voice quiver. 

Killer Queen had successfully grabbed one of the keys from the hooks in the meantime-- pulling it off carefully, and holding it in it’s hand. After the task was done, it’s eyes went to a stack of magazines that were sitting on the other side of the desk. Kira mentally tried to get it to stop-- “No! Killer Queen--!” 

The magazines flew to the floor in a rush, and Queen quickly deposited the key into Kira’s pocket. The man at the desk jumped in shock, looking around for what could have possibly knocked the papers over. “Er-- I’ll just--” 

Yoshikage made quick work of turning around and leaving. He mentally scolded Killer Queen for causing a scene, before pulling out the key from his pocket. Room 312-- it must be on the other side of the motel. He can at least thank his stand for that.

Quickly sliding into the passenger seat, the blond sighed quietly. “Our room should be on the other side.” You nodded, pulling the car around the building. The parking lot was beat up, it was obvious that the back of the motel didn’t get as much work as the front would. Successfully avoiding some potholes, you managed to park the car a good distance from the rooms. 

Turning the engine off and sliding the keys out, you looked over at your companion. He still seemed to be cold-- shivering just slightly, his hands buried in the sleeves of his sweater. It was cute. “Hey, let’s hurry and get inside. You look like you could use a warm shower.”

His eyes met yours for a split second. 

They were soft-- delicate, almost. Frosty blue dancing along in the shitty light of the lamp posts. 

But there was something else there. 

An emotion-- you didn’t quite know how to describe it. 

He looked away as quickly as he had looked at you, just barely nodding his head. “Yeah,” His voice was small. “Let’s go.” With that, Yoshikage opened the door and got out, walking towards the staircase on the side of the building. 

Huffing out a breath, you just shook your head. Always so secretive-- everything must be so hidden with him. You understood that he liked privacy, maybe more than the average 18 year old boy would, but still. Weren’t you his closest friend?

His only friend?

Shuffling out of the car, you made sure that the door was locked behind you. Speeding up your pace, you managed to catch up with Kira, walking beside him in silence. At times like these, you really wondered why you let yourself get into this mess. 

You could have left Yoshikage on his own. You could have refused his plea, and stayed in Morioh. You might have actually finished high school. 

You might have had a different life. 

But no. You decided to be a good friend, and try to help him escape his consequences. Murder, your mind screamed at you, He killed someone. 

Was it worth it? 

Was it worth dropping everything to help him? 

Kira stopped walking, finally finding the door to your room. Being so deep in thought, you accidentally walked right into him, stumbling back slightly and losing your balance. Just when you thought you were about to hit the cold concrete of the floor, something caught you. 

Yoshikage was looking down at you, Killer Queen holding you against his chest. Sometimes, he really wondered about you. 

“Are you okay?” He didn’t sound angry or upset-- genuinely concerned. That snapped you out of your thoughts within seconds, looking up at him like a deer in headlights. “Yeah, yeah. Sorry, I didn’t mean to run into you.” He just shook his head, a dumb little smile playing against his lips. “C’mon. I think you could use a shower too.” 

Ah.

That’s right. 

Despite whatever crime he may have committed-- Yoshikage Kira is your friend. He has been since elementary school, playing with you and only you. He’s been the only steady companion in your life-- and for that, you’d do anything for him. 

Even if that meant dropping everything.

Fumbling with the key, the blond managed to open the door with minimal struggle. The room was small-- one king sized bed pushed to one corner, a dusty TV on an equally dusty entertainment center, and a small grimy bathroom. It definitely wasn’t any 5 star hotel-- but it would do for tonight. 

Walking in, you kicked off your shoes by the door, and flipped on the light switch. It flickered for a few moments, before finally setting the room in a hazy yellow light. Yoshikage followed behind you, kicking off his own busted chucks and shutting the door behind him. He glanced around the room, before settling on the bed. 

The one bed. 

It wasn’t much of an issue for either of you. Kira didn’t shy away from giving you physical affection-- it wasn’t uncommon for the both of you to cuddle up in the same bed after a long day of driving. It was nice, in your opinion. 

You walked over to the bed and sat down, stretching out your arms, and yawning slightly. “Do you wanna shower first? Or should I?” Yoshikage smiled at you, before moving to sit beside you. “Go ahead. I think I’ll just get up and take one in the morning.” Shaking your head at his response, you grinned. “I dunno, you kinda smell.” 

Mocking offence, Kira glared at you. “Hey! I do not!”

“Stinky boy. Fine, I’ll go shower. Find something good to watch before we go to bed, then.”

Getting up, you grabbed the remote on the TV stand and threw it towards the bed. You shed your jacket on the way to the bathroom, letting it fall to the floor with a dull thud. 

The bathroom wasn’t the cleanest you’ve seen, but at least the water in the shower ran. As the stream warmed up, you took a minute to look at yourself in the mirror. Kira mentioned something about getting a haircut at the beach, and it seemed like it wasn’t a bad idea. Less hair to have to deal with, the better.

Shedding your clothes, you stepped into the shower. The water was nice and hot, hitting your skin and letting all the stress of the day melt down your back. It was a great way to recharge, and calm yourself down before going to bed. 

Using the cheap soap that the motel provided, you washed your hair and body, revelling in the basic smell of mint and lavender. It was nice that Kira had Killer Queen-- it gave you guys the opportunity to not have to sleep in the car, as well as giving you both basic hygiene. 

You kinda wished that you could see it. A “Stand”, as he had once called it, was supposedly your embodiment of a fighting spirit. You weren’t sure where he had learned that, but you chose not to question his sources. From the way that Kira described Queen, it seemed to be a big cat. 

Almost like a sphinx, pink in color, wearing only a small blue skirt with gloves and sandals. If Yoshikage was to get any animal to be paired with, you were happy it was a cat. It mirrored him so well-- calm, quiet, with the occasional thirst for chaos. 

As you slowly got out of your thoughts, you realized that the water had started to turn cold. Quickly shutting off the shower, you stepped out, grabbing a towel and drying yourself off. Bed sounded absolutely amazing right now, and you wondered what Yoshikage had managed to find on the TV. 

Slipping on your pants and shirt, you stepped out into the room. 

Kira was laying on the bed, tucked under the covers, his button up and khakis discarded on the floor next to your jacket. Glancing at the TV, it was some form of late night sitcom, with boring characters and an uninteresting storyline. Dropping your other clothes into the pile, you walked over to the bed. 

“Want me to turn the lights off?” Yoshikage nodded his head just slightly, his eyes already dipping with sleep. “Yes, please.” 

Walking over and flipping the switch, the room was cast in darkness, aside from the low brightness coming from the TV. Moving back over, you slid under the covers, making yourself comfortable. Yoshikage practically latched onto you the second you joined him, pulling you close and settling his head against your chest.

You sighed slightly, letting a smile run along your lips. 

“Good night, Yoshi.” 

“Mmm, night.”

[mrsgiovanna]

Bruno Bucciarati x Fem! Reader

A bit of a drawn out scenario with Bucciarati and the reader in an AU where everyone lives 💭❤️💙

No warnings, just fluff 😅💭

Word Count: 2117

“So Bucciarati, what do you think? I believe she’s the best person for a job like this. She has the ability to judge when to use force and her stand ability is well honed… you have reservations… what’s wrong?”

Bruno wasn’t known to wear his disdain so evidently on his face, but when it came to you, managing his emotions was slightly more difficult than usual. It also didn’t help that Giorno knew him so well. He was Giorno’s closest ally, his most trusted confidant, so he was able to be frank with him and voice concerns that would have otherwise gone unspoken.

“Well, she is strong, but I know she can be reckless when it comes to her own safety, much like someone else, might I add- but that’s a discussion for another day… perhaps, someone should accompany her just as back up in case the situation deteriorates,” suggested Bruno as he walked over to the balcony overlooking the sea. He always felt a sense of calm when looking at the ocean.

“You could always go with her…”

“Is that an order, Giorno?”

“Of course not. Look, I could send a small convoy of bodyguards with her and you’d still worry, Narancia could be tracking every living creature within meters of her and you’d still be uneasy, so rather just go yourself,” explained Giorno, watching him for even a hint of a reaction, which he did detect, but the young Don decided not to comment on that. “That’s settled then, I’ve already texted her asking for her to come over, she should be here soon,”

With Giorno’s words hanging in the air, Bruno turned his gaze back to the ocean, trying to calm the stormy feeling in his chest. Bruno always looked out for you, just as he looked out for everyone in his team. You shared a lot of history with the handsome raven-haired man, both having to join Passione as a necessity at a young age. You joined his team after working with a few other groups under Polpo’s control, finding a place that you truly felt you belonged. You both complemented each other well, compensating for what the other lacked. His maturity manifested in his quick thinking and his naturally kind nature and yours in your ability to put anyone at ease and talk to people at their own level. None of those traits could be mistaken for weakness however, as you were both capable of doing the unthinkable when your group or ideals were threatened.

You hurried along the spotless marble flooring that lead up to Giorno’s study, delicately knocking on the door before entering after hearing a soft invitation to do so.

“Buongiorno, Giogio, Bruno… ” you greet with a sunny smile. Bruno turned around to greet you with a smile while Giorno spoke.

“Buongiorno (y/n), thanks for coming over so quickly, this early in the morning, there’s just something very important that we need to discuss and we could really use your help later on,”

“Of course, sounds serious, I’ll assist in any way possible, you know that, Gio,” you reply, a hint of concern in your voice. The rest of the morning was spent discussing how to go about the mission without attracting any unnecessary attention. Once the strategy was ironed out, you and Bruno left Giorno’s villa and spent the rest of the day making sure you both had everything you would need, giving yourself a couple of hours to get ready before Bruno would come by to pick you up. You would have thought having 2 hours to get ready would be enough but you were mistaken. You just weren’t used to fancy evening gowns and stilettos, even less so to that much makeup, but you needed to channel your inner femme fatal and blend in with the rest of the guests at the flashy event.

Staring at your reflection with a critical eye, you had been tinkering with various accessories and rearranging your hair, this way and that before deciding that it was enough, the longer you took to do all of this, the more your nerves frayed. This would be the first time in years that you and Bruno would be on a mission by yourselves, and it’s definitely the first time ever that he’d be seeing you that dressed up. A wave of self consciousness washed over you, diluting the confidence that you’d been trying to build. Before you had time to further chip away at your confidence, your housekeeper came in to inform you that Bruno had arrived and was waiting for you downstairs.

On the drive over, Bruno thought about you and how much you had grown. When you had met each other, you were both just a pair of kids, who were forced to grow up too quickly. You’d taken everything in your stride though, and had seamlessly integrated into his team. Everyone loved your gentle yet protective nature. You were the one person he could be himself with, the one person who he could express his fears to, that he could fall apart on without any fear of judgment. He was the one who took care of everyone, but you were the only one he’d allow to take care of him.

He was let into your home and waited for you for a short time, barely having a chance to sit when he saw you gracefully descending the spiral staircase. You looked so beautiful, he was rendered speechless for a moment, quickly catching himself before you could notice how he was staring at you.

“(y/n)... you look beautiful, are you ready to leave?”

“Bruno, wow, you clean up well, and thank you… umm, I think I have everything I need, we can go. Thanks for coming with me, Gio told me it was your idea, I’m sure you have a million other things to do,”

“It’s fine, don’t worry about it,” he said through a strained smile, making a mental note to talk to Giorno about that. On the drive to the event, you couldn’t help but steal glances at Bruno… he looked so handsome, swopping out his white spotted suit for a black one, making the gold accents stand out even more. Everything about him was just perfect, from his perfectly cut, jet black hair, to his sparkling blue eyes and his well defined physique, it felt intimidating to have to be next to him for the night.

When you arrived at your destination, it was not difficult to zero in on your target. He was a spoiled, entitled looking brat. Both him and his father were not impressed with Giorno’s new rules for Passione, but stayed regardless, however, when his father died, his bad behavior was left unchecked. He always gave off the impression that he was waiting for an opportunity to betray Giorno. So you wanted to see what he would do when presented with an opportunity to do so.

Everything was going well, you and Bruno were satisfied that he wouldn’t betray the organization after he had passed every test you had set for him. Feeling relieved, Bruno excused himself for a moment to get you both a drink. Unfortunately for you though, you had caught the attention of the very man you were investigating. As he slowly walked toward you with a weird glint in his eyes, you became very aware of how much you needed Bruno there.

“You know, I’ve been waiting all night for that boyfriend of yours to leave so I could talk to you… the name's Elio… ” he says, twirling a lock of your hair in his fingers.

“Approaching a woman you believe is involved? And you should know who Bucciarati is… should you really be referring to him so casually? You’re not making a good case for yourself here, Elio. Now if you’d excuse me,” you made a move to put some distance between yourself and Elio, but in his persistence, he softly grasps your forearm and steps in front of you preventing you from going.

“Awww, don’t be in such a rush to leave signorina, we’re just talking… I was hoping to get to know you a little better, we run in the same circles but haven’t been formally introduced, it’s a crime, really”

You were getting annoyed, both with his persistence and the fact that Bruno was taking forever to come back. You decided to ignore him in the hopes that he’d go away without you having to use your stand or cause a scene.

“Is there a problem here? I’m sorry for taking this long tesoro, I was held up by an associate… in any case, come on, bella, we have to get going now,” You were thankful for Bruno’s intervention, but you were unnerved by how angry his eyes looked and the strong grip he held your hand with. You were confused. Was he angry at you? If not you, then who or what put him in this mood? Those questions swirled around in your mind as Bruno drove you home.

As much as your mind was clouded with unanswered questions, so was Bruno’s mind overtaken by anger. He hated the fact that some creep touched you, and he was even more upset that he couldn’t say or do anything about it… yet. He looked over at you, but your head was turned towards the window so he couldn’t see your face. Were you upset by how he dragged you off? You looked uncomfortable though, what if he read the situation incorrectly…

“Bruno, are you angry at me?”

“What? Of course not,”

“Really? You should let your face know,”

“Well, I guess this is just my face,” explained Bruno. You just nodded in acknowledgment, not really believing it, you knew his resting face well enough, and it wasn’t this. Feeling defeated, you continued to look out of the window until he drove up to your door. You remained quiet, rather choosing to look at your hands to avoid that sharp gaze. A few painfully awkward moments passed like that, before you summoned up your courage to speak. Evidently, Bruno had the same idea as you both turned towards each other and spoke at the same time.

“It’s clear that we both have things we want to say, so let’s talk inside rather?” you suggest, to which Bruno agrees with a small nod.

“I’m the one who interrupted you, so please, go first Bruno,” you say in an encouraging tone, while you both sat down, facing each other.

“Alright, thank you… here goes… I’m not angry at you, not even a little bit… I just lost it when I saw that cretin touching you so casually. You’re the most precious person in the world to me…I… ”

You stayed silent, encouraging Bruno to continue, trying to fight off the fluttery feelings coursing through you from what he just said.

“(y/n)… I love you, I’ve loved you for years now. I’ve been waiting for the right time to tell you… I guess that’s now… look, you don’t have to say anything, I’m sure it’s a lot for you to take in, and all I really want is for you to be happy,” the tenderness in his eyes and voice as he spoke was almost too much to bear, as you gently took his hands in yours.

“I… I love you too… for the longest time. I’ve only ever wanted the best for you, to help you realize your dreams in whatever small way I can. So you must know how happy I am to hear you say those words,”

Being deeply moved, Bruno leaned forward and hooked his finger under your chin to bring your gaze up to meet his own and captured your lips in a sweet but passionate kiss. You smiled into the kiss, tangling your fingers into the blunt ends of his hair, resting your forehead against his when you both had broken away from the kiss.

“You have no idea how long I’ve wanted to do this for,” he says in between a barrage of smaller kisses, suddenly breaking away to look at you.

“Tesoro, are you sure about this? You know first hand how this life can get, there’s always dangers to avoid, storms to weather…”

“Bruno, I don’t think anyone has endured more than us, and I’m certain that whatever else life throws at us, we can tackle together. I would choose to weather your storms with you, than bask in someone else’s sunshine any day.”

That was all the invitation Bruno needed to pull you into another passionate kiss, giving himself permission to indulge his own desires for once.

[moonbeambucky]

Hey Neighbor (Part 17)

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Reader Word Count: 4359 Warnings: fluff, light angst

Summary: You had a plan and then life came along with one of its own. With your future almost derailed you worked hard to get yourself back on track and finally everything seemed to be going right… that is, until your new neighbor moved in.

A/N: I know you’re excited for the wedding but we’re not quite there yet. Although I think you’ll be happy about this... mostly. Feedback is always appreciated!

HEY NEIGHBOR PART 16 | HEY NEIGHBOR MASTERLIST

Somehow it was decided that this was a good idea, that Coney Island wouldn’t be so bad on Memorial Day weekend. You were very wrong.

Everyone had the same idea, filling the subways until they were packed as you made the long trip to Brooklyn. What should have taken just over an hour became closer to two because of overcrowding. It was hard to guarantee that eight people would make it onto the same train with all the pushing and shoving of people ensuring that they made it inside before the doors shut.

By the time you arrived everyone was hungry and the mass of people covering the large Boardwalk only added to the frustration you were all feeling. Clint, Steve, Peggy and Bucky wanted Nathan’s hot dogs while you, Natasha and Wanda didn’t. You decided to split up, going down the Boardwalk to another place that was just as crowded but offered something for each of you.

“There’s no place to sit,” Natasha said, looking around as she held a lobster roll in one hand and a beer in the other.

“Ooh, over there,” you said, pointing to a bench across the Boardwalk that was quickly taken before you had the chance to take even one step towards it.

There were a few high top tables that you could stand up in front of so you quickly ran over to an open one before someone else could. Natasha lined up her food on the table, getting the restaurant’s name in the background as she took a picture.

“Clint just texted me. They’re finally about to order.”

“About time,” Wanda said, taking a bite of her sausage and pepper roll. She nudged over her container of fries towards you and Natasha, silently offering them.

“They’re asking if we should meet up with them by the Wonder Wheel.”

“Sounds good to me,” you said while chewing, covering your mouth so pieces of your cheeseburger didn’t spit out.

Despite the crowds this brief moment felt nice, feeling the breeze from the ocean and the warm sun heating your skin. Memorial Day weekend was the unofficial start of summer and that meant you could finally begin your countdown to graduation. You had three months more to go before you would finally reach your goal and it was… scary. Scary and exciting at the same time but you couldn’t wait for that day.

“So Saturday’s the big wedding huh?” Natasha smirked.

You raised your eyebrow, not giving in to the way she looked at you. “Yes it is but we’re getting there Friday and before you say anything our hotel has two beds, okay? Two of them.” you said, sticking two fingers in front of her face.

Natasha mumbled something under her breath that you didn’t bother to decipher. Nothing was going to happen. A little dancing, a little awkward conversation with people you don’t know and that’s it.

“Horses?” Wanda asked you, tilting her head up so you could get a glimpse. Natasha looked confused but held her tongue.

Music filled your ears as you passed a group of people gathered on the Boardwalk watching others dance. It was nice to see everyone let go and enjoy the sunshine.

Wanda kissed Sam as soon as the groups joined up again in contrast to Natasha. “I don’t like hot dog breath,” she said, looking into her bag for gum or a mint to give Clint.

Making a face she didn’t see, he mockingly signed back Natasha’s words making you laugh since you understood him. Bucky held his left palm up, sliding the middle finger of his right hand over it. To your shock you realized he just signed back “rude” to Clint.

Turning towards him you asked, “When did you learn ASL?”

“When someone told me our neighbor signs.” He smiled widely and you suddenly felt light enough for the breeze to carry you away. “C’mon,” Bucky said, nudging his head for you to start walking with the group.

He adjusted the brim of his baseball cap, which was the only difference between your outfits today as Sam pointed out. You and Bucky were basically matching and he thought it was cute that you coordinated even though it wasn’t planned.

You both wore crisp white t-shirts, jeans (though yours were shorts), and converse sneakers. Arguing that you were wearing red sneakers unlike Bucky’s black ones made no difference, everyone still thought it was a very “coupley” thing to do.

As you walked towards the Wonder Wheel you couldn’t help but stare at Bucky's arms. They had gotten much bigger ever since he started working out with Sam and Steve and those muscles definitely stood out now; tanned skin with a prominent vein running down his arm you couldn’t take your eyes off of.

“Swinging cars? Oh no. I’m good,” Sam said as you approached the line.

“Me too. I’ve got a belly full of hot dogs so I’d rather not,” Clint added.

The group split with Sam, Wanda, Clint and Natasha getting in line for the stationary cars as you, Bucky, Peggy and Steve waited for the swinging ones. When it was time to load into your car there were two benches facing forward. Steve and Peggy took the front one and you guys were in the back. Bucky let you enter first and you sat down quickly so the attendant could close the door, adjusting your bag between your legs on the floor.

Steve turned his head around, smiling at you in a way that made you furrow your brows at him but your unspoken communication was interrupted as the ferris wheel began moving backwards. He faced forward again, reaching his arm around Peggy in the cramped space.

The car stopped suddenly but above you was the shadow of another cart and the sounds of screams as it rocked along its own track. Everybody on the stationary cars were missing out, this was going to be fun.

Half a minute went by before the ferris wheel moved again, this time stopping at a point where your car was able to roll forward. You expected the jolt but it didn’t mean you were prepared for it and somehow you found yourself grabbing Bucky by the shoulder as you screamed with laughter as the cart swung back and forth. He didn’t seem to mind, in fact he wished you kept your hand on him the whole time.

He envied Steve holding Peggy close. When the car reached the top he watched them kiss, a small peck to show affection and Bucky was undeniably jealous. Steve had met the perfect girl in Peggy, and Bucky felt the same way about a certain person sitting next to him.

You only accepted his request to be his wedding date because he begged, he’s sure of that. It was so pathetic for him to plead but he really wanted you to go with him, and shamefully, since he knew you had sworn off dating, this was the closest thing he would ever get.

His profile was still up on the apps, and occasionally he would make plans to meet someone. The closer the wedding got, the less frequent it’s been. He’s not proud of the fact that he’s made dates and cancelled them. He tried his best to remember to cancel in advance but sometimes he would forget, becoming lost in the music he was creating, only to find a few messages with choice language he rightfully deserved from the people he didn’t mean to stand up.

Bucky wasn’t interested in any of them, only one person was always on his mind and yet he knew he would have to let that go. Going to the wedding together isn’t going to help his feelings but he hopes by some strange logic he can allow his heart to live out whatever fantasy is not coming true and then let you go.

“You wanna hit the beach now?” Sam asked, once you all got off the Wonder Wheel.

“Yeah, Nat says my ass is pasty,” Clint replied.

Natasha’s nostrils flared as her eyes widened in shock. “You are not tanning your pasty ass on this public beach Clint!”

Laughter rang out and Clint leaned in to peck a kiss to Natasha’s full lips which relaxed her tense expression. Despite all their teasing they loved each other deeply and it made your heart ache, longing to have a love like theirs.

The crowds on the beach hadn’t let up, not that anyone expected them to. Umbrellas of every color of the rainbow were spread out across the sand and it didn’t look like there was even a spot for all of you to fit among the crowd but that didn’t stop anyone.

Your sneakers crunched on the sand scattered along the wood planks by the entrance, grabbing the hot metal railing to pull them off before you walked down onto the beach. Bucky followed suit, holding his sneakers in hand while everyone else left on their flip flops or slip-on.

The sand was burning hot against your soles that also battled against sharp seashells as you trudged your way to a spot, following behind the group. Clint’s impeccable vision pointed out a spot big enough for all of you and rushed over there staking a claim.

Steve shrugged his shoulder down to let the heavy bag he was carrying for Peggy go. She had packed a large bag with towels, sunscreen and a few collapsible umbrellas. Sam helped Steve by setting up the umbrellas as everyone else worked to set their towels down.

Pulling out a large towel you placed your sneakers inside your tote bag, holding it open for Bucky in case he wanted to protect his from the sand as well.

“Hey where’s your stuff?” you wondered out loud as he placed his sneakers inside.

Bucky clenched his teeth together making an adorable face that told you your answer before he gave it. “When you said we were going to Coney Island I didn’t think you meant the actual beach. I figured food and drinks...” he trailed off, still awkwardly grimacing.

“It’s okay. You can share mine,” you offered. Turning away to unravel the towel, you missed the soft smile that settled on his face at the prospect of being close to you.

Bucky helped smooth out the towel, a pretty teal with gold pineapples printed across the fabric. He let a small huff out under his breath, disappointed by the fact that your towel was bigger than he expected and he didn’t have an excuse to be as close as he hoped. The feeling passed just as quickly as Bucky realized how stupid his thoughts were; you were only offering him the towel, it was not an invitation for anything else.

His mental chastising paused from the moment your hands hooked on the waist of your shorts, pulling them down to reveal a bikini. A sexy snakeskin pattern in a mix of steel blue, black with speckles of white that hugged you like a second skin.

Bucky’s mouth fell open as you pulled off your shirt, revealing the matching top and he had to force his gaze away. His cheeks felt hot and with the shade of the umbrella he’s not sure he could use the sun as an excuse for his bright red face.

Sam caught the interaction, raising an eyebrow to Wanda as his mouth pulled into a deep smirk.

“Hey Bucky!” The sound of Sam’s unexpected voice startled Bucky, making him jump slightly as he whipped his head towards him. “What are you wearing man? Jeans? I hope you don’t have a speedo under them.”

Everyone laughed though the sound of your giggling made Bucky ripen like a tomato. With a shaky voice he dismissed Sam’s claim, wishing he had thought this day through and worn board shorts like everyone else.

“You’re not beach ready!” Sam said, crossing his broad, sculpted arms over his chest.

Frustrated by the sound of another innocent giggle that fell from your lips, Bucky pulled off his shirt tossing it aside. “Happy? I’m beach ready!”

The breath was pulled from your lungs leaving you unable to speak, think or do anything other than stare at Bucky. Your eyes scanned his muscular body up and down, as if he had been sculpted by the gods himself.

Your hands longed to touch every ab that was carved into his stomach and when your gaze continued lower you thought you might go feral. The deep cuts on his hips had your mouth watering and without realizing it your tongue had swept across your lips. It wasn’t until Bucky moved to sit down that your focus was broken.

“You look great,” you stated, clearing the nerves away from your throat. Bucky shrugged it off with a modest half smile, unable to fully embrace the compliment coming from you. “No really, I’m actually jealous. How the fuck do you have that body with all the pizza we’ve been eating?”

Your question made him laugh, wrinkling his nose as the smile spread across his face. The tension had eased although you were very aware of Bucky as you laid on the towel, trying not to stare at him like he was a piece of meat and you hadn’t eaten in weeks.

As Sam spoke about an ER case you were happily distracted, even though you were tempted to ogle Bucky every time he shifted beside you, cringing at the gory details. The hours passed quickly as you laid out, relaxing or talking with Peggy as Natasha, Wanda and Sam went into the water. Bucky sat beside Steve and Clint, the three of them laughing at their conversation.

Peggy spoke in a low whisper, “After the way you looked at him today I don’t think you can fool yourself much longer.”

You didn’t respond because there wasn’t much to say. Peggy saw the look in your eyes, the admission of what you both knew was true and the fear that came along with having feelings for him, knowing it wouldn’t go anywhere.

“Anyone want food? I’m gonna get more hot dogs,” Clint said, wiping sand from the back of his shorts as he stood up.

Both your heads shook and he left just as Natasha was coming back. She pulled out another towel to wrap around herself, “He’s getting food?” she asked despite knowing the answer.

Wanda and Sam returned hand in hand, drying off in the still very warm sun and asking about what everyone wanted to do afterwards.

“I’ve never been on the Cyclone before,” Peggy said, looking at Steve as they both silently recalled the story he told her about throwing up after going on it as a kid.

By the time Clint returned he had already eaten the hot dogs he bought, feigning shock to see everyone packing up. Bucky put his shirt back on, slightly wrinkled from the way he tossed it into your bag, and he caught your gaze as you were slipping on your shorts.

He looked away, lifting the towel and shaking the sand off of it. You helped him fold it up to place back in your bag and Bucky kindly removed both pairs of sneakers to avoid an uncomfortable mess.

When you made it to the Boardwalk you leaned against the railing, wiping sand from the bottom of your feet before putting on your shoes. Bucky did the same though he could still feel grains of uncomfortable sand in his socks.

Natasha and Wanda needed to change so you followed them to the bathroom to use it as everyone else waited. By the time you reached the Cyclone you were paired off to sit with Bucky again, not that you minded.

“Hold up,” Sam began, lifting his hand towards Clint, “You’re okay to ride a rollercoaster after eating but not the swinging ferris wheel?”

Clint nodded as he shrugged in response, not knowing how to explain why. Sam rolled his eyes, sharing a confused look with Wanda. They made sure to sit in the back to be far enough behind Clint, just in case.

You and Bucky were cramped together in the padded leather seats of the historic coaster; packed in like sardines and secured even tighter as the lap bar came down.

“It’s squishing my thighs,” Bucky winced, laughing as the ride began; a sharp right turn before the rickety chain began pulling the car up the hill.

Your hands were both in the air as you went down the first drop but quickly you dropped them, holding on to the padded lap bar because despite having no room to move every forceful turn had you pushing against each other.

Screams were present throughout the ride as the coaster went down steep hills and hard turns and in the end you turned towards Bucky, laughing in the pit of your stomach as you saw his hair, loose and wildly covering his face.

He combed through it with his fingers, taming it as best as he could before trying to get himself out of the seat. Once he was free he held a hand out for you to take and that’s when you felt the ache in your thighs. You hissed as you rubbed them, feeling how sore they were from the rough ride.

“Maybe Bucky could rub them for you,” Natasha whispered in your ear as she passed by, laughing, hand in hand with Clint who, defying all laws, did not throw up.

You rolled your eyes and continued to walk, a little painfully as you were still feeling the dull throb from your legs. Passing a few carnival games Steve and Sam eyed each other, their friendly competitive nature carried over from their workouts to now see who could win the bigger prize for their girl.

“Sam, I’m serious, I don’t want a giant teddy bear,” Wanda insisted but Sam couldn’t hear her.

His focus was on the best spot to aim to knock over the six tin cans. He licked his lips, a confident smile spreading across his face. Winding his arm back he let go, leaving all but one can standing.

“Let me show you how it’s done Sammy,” Steve said with swagger, as he paid for his game.

Peggy and Wanda shared a look as she also expressed no interest in a four foot bear. “Honestly, my apartment is small. I can’t have a massive bear taking up space.”

Thankfully Steve’s aim was no better, leaving two cans standing.

“Oh look at that. All those muscles and you can’t knock down more cans than me. Looks like I should be the Captain now,” Sam snickered.

You and Bucky opted for a much more friendly competition playing alongside Clint and Natasha in the water gun game. The four of you sat down on the padded stools, paying for your game and waiting for the round to begin as more people joined. Beside you a small child sat on his knees on the stool, as his mother held onto him and told him what to aim for.

Grabbing the gun you tried to position it towards the target in advance, ignoring Bucky’s comments about how he has the aim of a sniper so he always wins. At the sound of the bell the water turned on and you were an inch off from the center of the target, quickly adjusting and hoping there was some chance you could still win. The prize didn’t matter, but bragging rights certainly did.

“Number eight’s a winner!” the employee resounded.

To your left you saw Bucky’s wide “I told you so” smile, written across his face that now glowed with the flashing blue light above his winning station. Another sound made you turn your head though, the kid next to you that burst out into tears after losing. Your gaze softened as you watched his mother try to comfort him as the employee asked Bucky what color dinosaur plush he would like as his prize.

“Hey buddy,” Bucky said, ignoring the employee for a moment as he knelt down beside the crying child. “Which color’s your favorite?”

With a few sniffles he lifted his head up, tiny curled hands wiping away his tears as he asked for the purple dinosaur. Bucky proudly handed over the plush toy to the now smiling kid, accepting his mother’s thanks as they walked away.

Your heart was swelling with warmth and when Bucky turned around he was met with a soft smile you couldn’t hide. He turned away smiling, trying to hide the dusting of pink he felt forming on his cheeks.

With everyone feeling a little hungry now you followed Steve who knew about a good place a few blocks away. Walking beside Bucky your fingers brushed against his every so lightly making goosebumps ripple up your arm. You wanted to take his hand, lace your fingers together as a small sign to let him know how you felt but you were too scared.

Steve brought you to a small Mexican place that had an enclosed patio, with good music blasting and brightly colored margaritas that everyone around you seemed to have. The guys pushed two circular tables together so you could all sit, looking over the menu of food which you were hungry for but more importantly drinks that you hoped would give you the courage to grab Bucky’s hand.

Your table was with the girls though Bucky was still beside you, squeezing into the other table next to Steve.

“Mmmm nachos, and ohh tacos… I feel like I haven’t eaten in forever. I want them all,” you joked, reading over the menu.

With food on the table and a strawberry margarita in hand you felt great. Today may have been hot and crowded but it was a perfect day spent with your friends.

Natasha stood up, trying to angle a selfie with everyone in it meaning you had to lean back towards Bucky and after your drink you were a little looser, tipping your head backwards to smile at him. Bucky laughed, smiling back at you before Natasha said she was ready.

Bucky moved in closer, resting his chin on your shoulder, his long hair tickled your neck which made you giggle just as Natasha took the picture. He lingered there for longer than he should have before he sat up straight, ignoring the way Sam looked at him.

Somehow everything felt right. Tonight was the night you were going to let Bucky know how you felt. Your hand slowly inched closer to Bucky’s, reaching out for his left hand resting on his thigh. All you had to do was touch it, a light caress by your fingers, just enough to let him know there’s something you want to say without saying it yet.

“Bucky!”

The high pitched voice of a woman calling out to him made your arm jerk back into the safety of your lap.

Bucky turned to see a woman he unfortunately recognized. Whitney, a bartender he had gone on a date with two months ago and ghosted afterwards. She was nice but there weren’t any sparks. He slept with her anyway, regretfully.

With her head cocked to the side and hands on her hips she smirked as she replied. “You were supposed to text me back!”

“Yeah, sorry about that…” Bucky lied.

“That’s not very nice.” She pouted, playfully swatting at his chest. “And after that night we had!”

Bucky forced a tight smile as he looked past her in the hope that she had friends waiting for her. Whitney continued to flirt, at least that’s what Bucky thought by the sound of her voice, the way she purred her words to him even though he wasn’t paying any attention.

Relief flashed in his eyes when another girl stumbled her way towards them, lacing her arm through Whitney’s to pull her away. Bucky had never been happier to see a drunken mess, because this one was saving him from dealing with her.

“Text me sometime, okay Bucky?” Whitney cooed.

“Uh yeah yeah, sure. It was nice seeing you.” Bucky responded quickly, barely hearing what she had even said.

Before he could turn to sit back down Whitney grabbed him by the collar and pressed her lips against his. You turned away, finding solace in your drink, avoiding eye contact with everyone.

Bucky contemplated if wiping his lips would be too childish even if it’s what he honestly felt like doing. He sat down again, embarrassed that everyone had to witness that.

“So…” Sam began, breaking the ice, “Another hook up huh?”

“What? No. I… No that’s nothing going to happen. Not with her.”

Sam scoffed. “Oh so some other girl then? Have you ever tried actually dating one person?”

Steve blinked a few times at Sam’s candid question even if he agreed with the sentiment. After all this time he still didn’t understand why Bucky was so averse to dating.

“It’s just that…” Bucky started before he let out a grunting sigh.

From the corner of his eye Bucky saw your head turn ever so slightly to listen in. His cheeks began to match your margarita and he knew he couldn’t answer Steve honestly, not when he wanted to have this conversation with you in private. He hates the reputation he’s built up for himself, desperately wanting to be the great boyfriend you once thought he could be.

Bucky shrugged off the question, taking a sip of his drink instead. When his glass hits the table he looks towards you and your eyes meet for a second. His smile seems fake and you know why. He’s holding back from answering the truth because you know he probably wants to have an explicit conversation about all the girls he’s fucked, bragging about every dirty detail to the guys but he can’t because you’re there.

The rest of the night was a blur as all you could think about was how to let go of your feelings because you could never be in a relationship with Bucky.

PART 18

[kpopscenario]

A day on the beach

Pairing: Vernon x Reader

Genre: Fluff

Word Count: 1.8k

Summary: You finally managed to organize the much needed day trip to the beach with your boyfriend - and some other friends who would cause some mixed feelings in Vernon.

A/N: Mentions of jealousy

A sigh of relief escaped my lips as I looked out of the window and finally saw the beach. The weather was just right- not too cold, not too hot. Just perfect not to freeze in only a bikini but also not to sweat like a pig under the sun. I was sitting on the passenger’s seat, next to my boyfriend Vernon, who always wore a content little smile on his face while concentrating on the road. 

“If it takes us ten more minutes to arrive-”

“If you complain one more time, I’m gonna yeet you out of the car”, Chan groaned towards Soonyoung who was now pouting like the immature adult he was. Vernon just took a turn left and then already could drive onto the parking area. 

“Look outside, we’re already here, relax”, the male next to me said in his calm voice. 

Minutes later, we were ready to wander to the actual beach, with all our bags and umbrellas. It was actually hilarious how we kinda looked like we were going on a week trip with everything they insisted on taking with us. As we finally decided a spot that wasn’t in a crowded area, Chan took the towels out, I arranged the umbrellas, Vernon got himself something to drink and Soonyoung immediately got rid of his shirt. That man had been whining during the whole ride about how badly he missed the sea and being able to just lay down on the sand or play beach volleyball. It was cute how excited the pink-haired male was and it didn’t take him more than a minute to run into the waves, making us laugh. He clumsily tripped one meter inside the water- falling face first. Chan only shook his head, half ashamed for his friend, but then got undressed as well. 

“Are we going in too?”

Within a minute, both Vernon and I were ready to join our clumsy clown and so we all went into the quite cold water. While Chan was very passionate about swimming (just like Vernon and Soonyoung), I was quite respectfully approaching them. Not because of the temperature, but because I was paranoid what might swim around my feet without me knowing. Luckily, they knew that and they didn’t splash me with water to rush me. Vernon was patiently waiting for me, like the gentleman and good boyfriend that he was, even asked if I wanted to hold his hand, which I then gladly took to get deeper. Meanwhile the other two were already dipping their heads underwater or splashed each other. 

Although I wasn’t the biggest fan of being in the water, Vernon made sure to always be around if the other two were occupied with something else or too far away. A few minutes in, the three of them started playing with a soft ball while I preferred to watch them being all silly and excited. The sweet thing was Vernon keep checking how far I was away, or if I was comfortable - something I really appreciated him for. His supportive, caring and low-key soft personality made me feel safe in wherever we were and I loved him for that. After a while, I felt my body shivering and I bet my lips were turning purple. 

“I-I think I'm gonna lay down a bit”, I explained before seeing my boyfriend approve with a nod. So I left the water and headed to our place, wanting to feel the soft towel underneath me. As soon as I was out of the ocean, I felt myself relieved, the ocean just wasn’t my thing. But lying on the towel with a book and something to drink was so much better. Therefore I did exactly that, casually watching the three friends playing or making challenges who could swim the fastest. It was clear that we all needed this day off. They hadn’t had a free fully day off in a long while, therefore it was a hell to organize this day trip. But here we were and I couldn’t have been happier. 

I was on the verge of falling asleep with my open book covering my face, as someone was nudging my leg. 

“Whaaat”, I whined and peeked up - only to see Chan with a grin on his face, all wet and his grey hair being stuck to his forehead. 

“I was gonna get myself some ice cream, are you joining?”, before I answered, my eyes gazed towards my boyfriend. “They keep coming up with new challenges.” 

Amused by them, I giggled and then got up and got my purse. The ice cream stand wasn’t too far away so I didn’t mind getting a shirt over the bikini, why should I? 

“One chocolate and one strawberry please”, I ordered, already knowing that Chan would want nothing else but strawberry ice cream, it was always the same. “I still have no idea how you can actually enjoy strawberries.”

“Uh excuse me when that’s the best flavor?”, he scoffed and contently started eating (deliberately using mmmmmmmhs a million times, which made me nudge him). “Not at you coming for me when you’re ordering the most boring flavor. Chocolate- how creative.”

“Aye! I'm gonna give you a brown nose if you don’t stop disrespecting my amazing taste.” 

Back on our towels, we sat next to each other and both enjoyed our ice cream. Eventually, my eyes met with Vernon’s and he waved back with a wide smile that made me giggle. Chan leaned back and supported his weight on his elbows. 

“From afar, Vernon looks like a stick figure dancing in the water.”

That comment from Chan made me burst out into laughter.

“WHERE did that come from?”, still giggling, we now both observed my boyfriend who definitely looked more handsome than a fucking stick figure. But I kinda knew what Chan meant. Vernon wasn’t the one with the broadest shoulders, not that buff, event that didn’t mean he was exactly skinny. he was perfectly fit. I hit Chan’s chest nevertheless and whined. “Vernon DOESN’T look like that, mister. Just because he’s not as buff as Seungcheol? You’re not that buff either, lil boy.”

That caused Chan to sit straight. 

“DON’T call me that, you dwarf. And I am buff! At least more buff than half a year ago, look!”, he then sucked in some air to appear in a more adequate position, flexing not only his broad upper body but also his arms, which indeed have gained muscle weight overtime. 

“Well, okay maybe a tiny little bit. But look”, I started poking the faded outlines of abs. “still squishy here.” 

Little did I know that Vernon’s expression dropped when he looked over - only to see me touching Chan’s body. 

He just wanted to check what I was doing or if I got bored with him still being in the water. But apparently I had very good company. 

When Vernon’s jealous, he doesn’t seem like it from the outside. He wouldn’t look too different than when he’d just woken up or when he’s bored. Just staring but being rather silent. However, he stopped playing with Soonyoung for quite a moment, his eyes fixed on me and how I giggled to things Chan were saying. What was that funny? He was very well aware that Chan had been my closest friend and that since a long time. But something in Vernon’s head told him that we were being more than just friendly right then. 

“Everything okay?”, Soonyoung asked, impatient with his friend not passing the ball back but Vernon then shook the feeling off as well as possible to continue playing. He was very rarely jealous and even if he was, he mostly was mature enough to know what I was doing, or if I was doing it deliberately or accidentally. He didn’t like being jealous. You were in a strong relationship and he was proud to be my number one safe place, although Chan surely counted as one too. One side of him tried to shake it off and let me have fun with my friend, just like Vernon did with Soonyoung. But the curiosity and slightly anxious feeling of jealousy tingled in his fingertips and he kept sighing when looking over, still seeing us talking passionately, pushing each other or even laying down together. 

‘What am I even jealous of’, he mumbled to himself over and over. Literally to the point where he just couldn’t keep looking over. 

“Hey sorry, I need a break”, he mumbled and gave Soonyoung a pressed smile before leaving the water. He couldn’t take his eyes off us not even seeing him approaching until he was literally standing infront of my towel. Like that, he was blocking the sun for me, which made me whine. 

“Step away, love”, I sat up. 

With that, Vernon nodded and lied exactly next to me, on the same big towel which now didn’t leave any more space. 

“Soonyoung called for you, Chan”, he said casually, rubbing his nose to not seem suspicious about lying. His friend surprisedly looked at him and then stood up.

“Alright then, see you later.”

Vernon waited until the distance was big enough to lie on his back and wrap an arm around my shoulder. This made me smile and roll towards him. He didn’t say anything for a while, not knowing if he should even mention being jealous. He literally felt unnecessarily dramatic with this feeling, especially cause it was rare for him. 

“What was that?” “Huh?”

“You touching Chan, giggling and having fun.”

It took me a moment to know what he even meant, and why he was pointing it out in the first place. 

“Is it bad that we were having fun?”, he sighed.

“Of course not, but...”

“Wait”, I interrupted him as I sat up and looked down at him. “Don’t tell me you’re jealous? Are you?”, now he definitely felt embarrassed about his feeling. Him hiding his face behind his hands proved the whole point, making me giggle. “Babbbyyyyyyy, no reason to get jealous of!”

“I know, I know. Ugh sorry, it’s stupid”, he groaned as he felt my weight now half on top of him as I made sure to cuddle him. Giving reassurance would be enough to calm himself down again. It always helped to kiss his shoulder and explaining the context. 

“We .... uh.... he said that you looked like a stick figure in the water. So I defended you by calling him a lil boy and then, you know, he had to flex.” 

That explanation already was enough to make Vernon start laughing, he could imagine the scene way too well. We were now just laying there, giggling and making fun of the situation. And like that, Vernon felt lighter. 

“Thanks for not calling me a stick figure.” “I got you, baby! But it’s cute when you’re jealous.”

[novantinuum]

Fandom: Steven Universe

Rating: T

Words: 600K~

Summary: His family’s not present, the third time he runs away. They never see the creature he becomes.

Early corruption AU.

It’s time to get down to Bismuth.

If you read this and enjoy, I’d greatly appreciate your support through reblogs here, or kudos/comments on AO3 as well. Thank you! <3

____

“So no one wanted to listen to you, huh?” Bismuth asks, leaning her arms atop the custom anvil marking the center of her classroom forge.

Amethyst shrugs, pacing the length of the room. “I mean, to be fair, my theory’s depressing as hell. Part of me can’t blame them for wanting to look the other way.”

“It’s still the closest thing to a lead we’ve got right now,” Lapis— perched atop a mostly-empty counter at the back of the forge— chimes in.

Bismuth nods, squatting to gather a handful of iron pellets from the large burlap sack at her feet. If there’s one thing she acknowledges as rock-solidly true about herself, it’s that she thinks best when she’s working directly with her hands. Truth be told, not many Gems have any use for weapons in Era 3, but the sword forging process itself feels comfortably familiar, enough so that the rhythm of its repetitive steps are a solid way to free up her higher faculties to muse on other things.

Other things such as... how to find a missing comrade and friend. Her centuries of intuition tell her that there’s still plenty they don’t yet understand about the events leading up to Steven’s disappearance.

“She’s right,” she says encouragingly. “And if we change the angle at which we’re approaching this, it’s possible we might finally discover something new. So!” She presses the pellets in her hand together tight, and strolls towards the molten pool sequestered in the far corner so she can heat them to a malleable temperature. “Any ideas?”

Peridot, sitting crisscross on the warm stone close to the tiled line upon which Amethyst is pacing, purses her lips.

“Well...” she hums in start. “For starters, we’ve spent all our time thus far searching for Steven and that monster individually. If we’re theorizing that they could be the same entity, maybe we should switch our focus...”

“To just the monster,” Lapis finishes. “It’s bound to be far bigger than Steven. So, easier to find.”

“We gotta stop searching on land, too,” Amethyst says, crossing alongside the anvil just as Bismuth’s beginning to hammer the billet out into a thin, narrow blade. “We’ve got tons of sensors set up all across the main continents from when we were still tracking down corrupted Gems, but next to nothing in the water. The ocean’s our blind spot.”

Peridot frowns, propping her chin against her palm. “Do you really think it’s just been swimming at sea this whole time?”

“I dunno. Corrupted Gems are weird, man.”

The hydrokinetic Gem snorts suddenly, shielding her laughter with a hand to her mouth. “I mean, I could steal away the whole ocean again, if that’d make the search easier.”

“Dude, that’s a terrible idea.”

Her expression falls flat. “I know. It was a joke. I’ll just expand my search radius on my flights.”

Bismuth begins forming a thin decorative ridge down the center of the sword with her shapeshifted hand and a hammer, a new thought bubbling to the surface.

“Y’know,” she murmurs amidst her detail work, raising a brow, “what would be helpful is if we could maybe... Amethyst, you know a lot about human technology, right?”

“Yeah?”

“Well, isn’t it true that humans can dial up a specific number and make contact with a single, unique person?”

She nods in confirmation.

“And the phone itself is traceable, right? ‘Cause one time, I’m pretty sure I saw Steven using this program to see where his friend Connie was. He was waiting for her to arrive at Little Homeschool to visit.”

Amethyst turns up her nose. “Ugh, I always thought those tracking apps were kinda creepy.”

“But useful, in the right situation,” she states, holding up a firm, resolute finger. “See, that’s the technology I wish we had right now. I wish there was a way to search up the exact current location of a specific Gem, just... without the phone part.”

On the other side of the forge, Peridot raises a hesitant yet hopeful hand.

“Okay, but what if... we could?”

[softjaehyvn]

strangers | l.ty

— angst ; 5k

— mentions of cancer

He loved to work anywhere. It did not matter if it's at home, in a café, or just outside on a bench close to the ocean, if there was one.

Since he traveled a lot, he always had new places to go and continue what he was doing at that moment. But that also meant he had no one who could appreciate his hard work.

No one, until he saw her in that restaurant.

She was the most beautiful woman he had ever seen. He wanted to talk to her, as soon as he heard her sweet voice talking to a man in front of her, softly asking if he was the man she wanted to meet.

As soon as the other man nodded, she smiled so brightly and in Lee Taeyong's eyes, it was the most beautiful smile he had ever seen. And it hurt that this smile was not for him.

He was ripped from his thoughts as someone placed a plate with delicious food in front of him. "I hope you enjoy your meal", the woman said, smiling friendly as Taeyong looked up at her. "Thank you", he answered and started eating.

But he could not stop thinking about her beautiful smile.

Lee Taeyong was back in South Korea. After spending a weekend in Venice and a whole week in Stockholm, he was finally back. writing in other countries always made him feel better because he never got out of his apartment or the studio.

"Hyung, are you back?", Jaemin, one of his best friends asked. the younger male had a spare key just to check-in, just like the rest of his group. Whenever they wanted they could go inside and get something from Taeyong's fridge or whatever they wanted. It was kind of a shared apartment, but the other boys slept at their parent's house since Taeyong's apartment was pretty small for all those people.

"Yeah, finally got back. And I’m so tired", Taeyong whined and got up to greet his friend.

"Then stop working and go to sleep", Jaemin scoffed and let go of Taeyong, just to see the filled pages Taeyong had written in the last week.

"You wrote all of this in just a week? Hyung, I guess I’ve always underestimated you", Jaemin said while reading a bit through the lyrics.

Taeyong started to laugh. "Jaemin, you know I’m always like this", he said. "I can't stop writing when I’m somewhere else. Stockholm and Venice did something to me."

"Venice? You didn't tell me you wanted to travel there! Hyung, I’ve always wanted to go there", Jaemin exclaimed as he continued reading.

"One day we'll go there together, yeah? We all together. It's really beautiful there", Taeyong said and chuckled, he found it adorable how mad Jaemin seemed to be simply because Taeyong had not told him, he would be going to Venice.

"I'm sure you're going to love it there. There were so many places to visit, but I only spent the weekend there. The rest of the week I was in Stockholm as planned", Taeyong explained. "I think of going to Berlin soon. You wanna come, too?", Taeyong asked the younger.

Jaemin nodded. "Yes, of course, hyung. I'll tell Mark, too, then we can go together", he answered.

"That'd be amazing. I missed traveling with you guys", Taeyong smiled, then he yawned. "I think I’m going to bed. If you want to, you can try to work on the lyrics I wrote. We need to hand something to pd-nim soon."

"Yeah, I'll get to it right now. Do you want me to call mark, too? I thought I wouldn't invite him since you're really tired and you know how he can be sometimes “, Jaemin chuckled. "Yeah... thanks for that", Taeyong grinned. "Get to work, Jaemin-ah."

"I. will, hyung", he promised, but then he seemed like he got an idea. "Did you eat something?", he asked. Taeyong just shook his head. "I thought I'll order something when I wake up again", the elder answered. "Forget that, I'm ordering pizza now. You can sleep after you ate", the younger protested and took out his phone, laughing at the elder groaning. "Are you serious? I just want to sleep", he whined.

"Stop being a baby and wait for half an hour. It's not going to kill you. At that time, we could read over your texts", Jaemin said and took out his phone to order something to eat.

"Yeah, okay. that's a good idea, too", Taeyong said and sat down on his couch. They worked on Taeyong's lyrics, Jaemin was impressed by how much Taeyong had written in just a week. Taeyong loved his work. he loved being able to travel around.

Suddenly he remembered you. He remembered your soft smile at that one man and started smiling. he could not stop thinking about you. He remembered your sweet voice, asking the man if he was the one she wanted to meet.

"You okay, hyung? Why are you suddenly smiling?", Jaemin asked. "I'm fine, just thought about someone I saw in Venice", Taeyong answered. "Was it some girl?", his best friend grinned and laughed at Taeyong's panicked look. "Tell me about her. How did you meet her?"

So, he started talking. He told him everything about you, telling his best friend about how much you inspired him to write more love songs. That was something Taeyong always wanted to do but he could not do it since it did not fit the style of songs he usually wrote.

"You're cute, hyung", Jaemin said grinning. "You have a crush on a girl you couldn't even talk to. Who knows, if you're ever going to meet her again."

"I don't care. she inspired me a lot without even knowing", Taeyong chuckled and pointed at his lyrics. "That's the proof."

"I know, hyung... I know", Jaemin only said before he got up to get the pizzas and enjoyed his time with his closest friend.

They just had booked their flight tickets to Berlin and smiled brightly. It had been a long time since Taeyong, Jaemin and Mark had traveled somewhere together and Taeyong had to admit that he missed traveling with his two best friends. He had wanted to do that again and finally, they would do it. 

"We got the tickets and booked our hotel. I hope there will not happen anything bad", Taeyong said. "Don't be such a pessimist. Nothing will happen, okay? We'll fly to Berlin and enjoy our time together. We needed that", Jaemin said smiling and opened a new page on Taeyong's laptop. He looked for something to eat. Taeyong stopped him right away. "No, don't. I went grocery shopping today just to be able to cook something for us", he said. 

Well... Taeyong tried. but as Mark was able to distract him, the food burned and they couldn't eat it. So, they had to order take out. But no one cared. They liked to have their free time and spend them together as best friends. And finally, they were able to spend more time together. Taeyong was excited. In a few days, they would be on the plane to Istanbul, then Berlin. 

"Guys? What do you think about this?", Jaemin asked. he showed the other boys a few lines he just had written. 

The lyrics Jaemin showed them were emotional, full of love. It was completely different from what he would write usually.

"That sounds good", Taeyong commented and smiled.

"Since when are you so emotional?", Mark giggled. He groaned as Jaemin hit him.

"I don't know... probably since I'm dating Seoyeon", Jaemin laughed. The other two boys widened their eyes. They didn't know about Jaemin dating one of the producers of SME, the entertainment they all were working in. 

"Since when are you two dating?!", Taeyong blurted out.

"Oh... I didn't tell you, right? Seoyeon and I are dating for almost two months now. I kind of forgot to tell you about it", Jaemin laughed a bit and his cheeks reddened as always when he got shy.

Long flights were always a little problem for Taeyong. But if he took his medication, it wouldn't be a problem at all. Him having cancer had been a reason to even fire him from his job since there always was the risk of something happening to him. But SME loved him. They loved his lyrics. That's why they would keep him in the company.

Taeyong was truly a genius when talking about song lyrics. Not only the company loved them but the fans of the artists he wrote for and his fans did as well. He enjoyed the reactions and speculations as they were trying to figure out what deeper meaning the lyrics had.

As usual, he had his notebook open and ready to write something down if he would get something in mind that he could work on. But it seemed like his mind was empty. He couldn’t even get one line together that sounded good to him.

“Sorry, you’re sitting on my seat!”, someone said and Taeyong looked up. His eyes widened as he saw you standing there.

“O-oh, I’m sorry. I didn’t notice it”, he hurriedly got up and tried to make space for you. You smiled and stepped back a little so he can get out of the tight spot. When you tried to get to your seat, you tripped and he put his hands on your waist, stopping you from falling.

“Careful”, he said and held your hand until you sat down.

“Thank you”, you answered and tightened your belt as Taeyong sat down next to you.

“You’re welcome. I’m Taeyong by the way. Nice to meet you”, he smiled as he also tightened his belt. His heart started beating faster as you also smiled when you told him your name. He couldn’t believe that you were there, in the same plane as him, and seated right next to you. Was it luck? He honestly didn’t know.

“You kind of seem familiar to me? Is it possible that I saw you somewhere before?”, you then asked him. He nodded.

“I saw you in Venice. It was at that restaurant, what was it called?”, he murmured as he tried to remember the name. “Right! Ai Mercanti was the name.”

„Right! It was such a great place though!”, you said and the moment he saw your smile again, his heart stopped a beat before starting to pound in his chest. He was in love with your smile.

“Where are you traveling?”, Taeyong asked you. He sort of was disappointed when you told him that you would stay in Istanbul for a while before heading back to Seoul for your work. During the flight, Taeyong didn’t even write a little bit into his notebook. He was either sleeping or talking to you.

You thought Taeyong was cute, a passionate person who loved his work over everything. He had shown you a few of his lyrics and surprised you by telling you that he wrote a few of the songs you loved to listen to.

“I didn’t think that I would meet the person who wrote my favorite songs”, you giggled and read over a few drafts he had written down in his notebook.

“Well, you did”, Taeyong answered smiling before he yawned. He checked the time, noticed that you both had been talking for over an hour and he noticed that it was late.

“I think, I will try to sleep. You should, too”, he said and put the blanket he had brought with him over his body. You only nodded, also trying to cuddle yourself into your blanket. Eventually, both of you fell asleep.

“Hyung”, someone was shaking his body softly but it was enough to wake Taeyong eventually up. He looked around confused and noticed that the plane already landed. “We’re in Istanbul. We have to get out and go to our next plane”, Mark said and Taeyong looked to the seat next to him. It was empty. But there was a small piece of paper which he picked up and read it. There was a small text saying that you loved talking to him during the flight and you wrote down your number.

“Who was that?”, Mark asked him curiously, trying to peek on the note. But Taeyong folded it and hid it in his pocket. He only brushed it off with a small “No one” and grabbed his bag where he had put his notebook and other things in. He hurried to get out of the plane and breathed in as soon as he finally was able to get fresh air.

“Now I kind of regret that we didn’t stay here for like a day or something. We could’ve eaten that thing Yuta had recommended us”, Taeyong pouted. 

“Are you sure that it isn’t because of the girl?”, Mark asked him, causing Taeyong to widen his eyes but also shook his head immediately.

“Of course not! She has nothing to do with this. I only spoke to her today. It was the first time I ever talked to her. And I probably won’t ever see her again, so it doesn’t matter”, Taeyong answered. It was a big lie, but he didn’t want to tell the other two boys that he would be meeting up with her as soon as they were back in South Korea.

“Yeah, yeah. Keep on lying to yourself, Taeyongie”, Jaemin laughed and they both finally entered the huge airport. At first, it seemed like the three boys were lost but they were lucky to find someone who spoke fluent English so Mark and Jaemin could ask them for help. It took them around half an hour to finally arrive at their next gate where they would be going to their next plane to Berlin.

All of them were already exhausted. It would take around three more hours on a plane until they would finally in Berlin and would go to their hotel. Taeyong decided to work on his notes for a few songs his manager asked him to write. Soon, there would be a new group debuting and they needed good songs.

While he was thinking about you, possible lines for songs (to be exact, they mostly were love songs) were written in his notebook and he was proud of all the paragraphs he managed to write in only two hours. For the last hour, he decided on sleeping and was woken up by Jaemin as they landed.

His medication was really heavy so he always slept over. One of the boys always had to come over to his place to wake him up so he could at least show up at the company for once. Sometimes, the boys even thought he was dead because he didn’t move at all or even woke up, no matter how hard they tried to wake him.

That usually had been in the beginning after the doctor diagnosed him with his tumor. Now his body got used to the heavy medication and he didn’t pass out a lot anymore. It still happened that he just fell asleep somewhere or even just lose his consciousness when they were on their way home from a long day at the company.

“We landed. We’re in Berlin”, he was all smiley and happy and Taeyong was grateful that he still could see his best friends who were like a family for him happy.

Taeyong got up and took his bag, going to the exit with Jaemin. Mark already was out, waiting for them. The youngest of the three was impatient, wanting to go to their hotel and just sleep. Taeyong put his arm around Mark and smiled. “Don’t worry, we’ll be at the hotel soon and you can sleep as much as you want to. We all need it”, Taeyong said and Mark nodded.

“I’m just exhausted because of the flight. But anyway, how are you feeling? Are you too exhausted?”, Mark asked him worriedly. Taeyong shook his head.

“I’m good. The medicine wasn’t as heavy as I thought it would be. I’m doing okay. I will be able to make it to the hotel without passing out”, he joked but he knew his illness was a sensitive topic to his friends. Taeyong always took his illness way too easy than he actually should.

“If you tried to be funny about your illness, you know I hate that. I’m sorry Taeyong Hyung”, Jaemin said and sighed.

“I know. I shouldn’t take it as easy as I do but I… I try to make the best of it. I’m here with you guys now, I’m living the life of my dreams. I just try to enjoy it. And I know exactly that this whole thing is super sensitive. I get that. But I just try to forget it for a while…”, Taeyong said while they were walking into the airport.

“I also get that. Let’s have a great vacation here, okay? Don’t think about work, don’t think a bit about lyrics. I want you to have your time with us, yeah?”, Jaemin said and Taeyong only smiled when he nodded.

Jaemin might be two years younger than him, but he was truly more mature than someone would expect. He was a dork, yes, he always managed to make the others laugh, but he knew whenever there was a serious moment, he should back off and try to help.

“We should go. I’m getting tired”, Taeyong then said and both Mark and Jaemin kind of panicked as they rushed a little to get out of the airport as soon as possible. Soon, they were in a cab, the driver was luckily speaking a little English, so Mark and Jaemin were able to communicate with him.

No matter how tired he was, Taeyong couldn’t go to sleep without checking the paper you had given him. He smiled as he noticed the small heart next to your number and he immediately took out his phone to save your number. Before he actually texted you, he decided to get ready to sleep.

When he finally was ready to sleep, he took his phone again and opened the still empty chat with you.

“Hey it’s Taeyong ^^”

It didn’t take long until you answered.

“I thought you’d never text me. Was your flight okay?”

“Yes… We just arrived at the hotel. I’m really tired and I will go to sleep now. How is Istanbul?”

“I didn’t go around much yet but the place I’m staying in is so beautiful”

You and Taeyong texted for almost an hour. It didn’t take long until he finally noticed that he actually should sleep. That is what he texted you. You only answered that you were sorry for keeping him up for so long. He smiled at your answer.

“It’s okay, I’ll sleep now, yeah?”

“good night, yongie”

His heart fluttered at the nickname and he couldn’t stop smiling. Taeyong put his phone away and eventually, he fell asleep while he was thinking about you.

“did you sleep well?”

Taeyong looked on his phone as the message arrived. He smiled a little which didn’t go unnoticed by Jaemin and Mark. The boys currently were at a “Who was it?”, Jaemin asked grinning. “Is it the sweet girl you were seated next to?”

“Yes, it’s her”, Taeyong admitted. “Also… do you remember the girl I saw in Venice?” As both of them nodded, Taeyong continued talking. “It’s her.”

Jaemin widened his eyes, he couldn’t believe the luck Taeyong had. He was happy for his best friend and smiled. “I’m so happy for you, Hyung. Seriously, it actually so unbelievable but I’m so glad that you found her and even talk to her now. If it makes you happy, I am happy, too”, Jaemin spoke and Taeyong couldn’t help but smile even more.

“Thank you so much, Jaeminie.”

That evening, you and Taeyong talked on the phone. Neither you nor him were tired since you slept over the whole afternoon to evening and now had time to just talk. He told you about how much you had inspired him to write love songs which weren’t his strength, no matter how often his company asked him to write a few.

“That’s so sweet, god I can’t with this”, you whined and he grinned. “Can you read them out for me again?”

And he did. He just read them, smiling as he imagined your beautiful smile. He truly fell for you before even knowing you and he was sure as soon as he finally got to know you better, he’d be highs over heels in love with you.

“The texts are so beautiful. Which group do you think they will let them record them?”, you asked him. “Only… tell me if you’re actually allowed to. I don’t want to get you in trouble or something.”

“No, it’s okay. I just write too much and sometimes they don’t even use the texts. Then I’m just uploading them on SoundCloud with Jaemin and Mark, my two best friends”, he explained. “I feel like this song might not fit to any group so it might end up being recorded by a few other friends.”

“You sing, too? God, is there anything you can’t do?”, you asked him and giggled. Everything you did made him smile like an idiot. He never thought he could ever fall for someone like this.

“Well, Mark and I are usually doing the rap but some people say I should sing more”, he laughed.

“Could you maybe sing something for me?”, you asked him shyly, not sure if he would do it.

“I’m not so confident with my singing, actually”, he said. “But one day, I will sing for you, promise.”

“You don’t have to, Yongie. It’s okay if you’re not comfortable with it”, you said. “Hey, umm, I need to sleep now, if that’s okay for you? I got an appointment with a salesman early tomorrow and need to rest properly.”

“Of course, angel, I need to sleep now, too”, he said. “Sleep well, Y/N”.”

“You, too, Yongie”, you called him by the nickname again and again, his heart was pounding in his chest. As you hung up, he couldn’t stop thinking about how it would be to see you again. It made him happy that he was able to talk to you, to get to know you. In the moments you two were talking, he seemed to forget about his illness. He seemed to feel healthy and strong while he was actually weak and sick.

It didn’t take him much time to fall asleep again. He slept peaceful and well, better than he had before, ever since his doctor had diagnosed him with cancer. Taeyong didn’t know what made him feel happier when he woke up the next day.

During the small vacation, Taeyong enjoyed his time with his two best friends and… he was happy. He was satisfied with how his life was at the moment.

On the flight back, they were also stopping once in Istanbul, making him question if you already had returned to Seoul since you didn’t have your return tickets yet when Taeyong had called you for the last time two days ago. He didn’t want to bother you as you were there for work and not for vacation.

If he only knew that you were waiting for him to call. You had already finished all your work there and had a few free days which he didn’t know. Also, you were shy, that was enough not to call him.

After the long flight, they were picked up by Johnny; the young Korean-American male was the only one who had a driver’s license and had agreed to pick the three men up as soon as they were back in Seoul. First, he dropped off Mark and Jaemin. When they arrived at Taeyong’s apartment, he smiled and got out of the car, Johnny following him to carry his luggage.

“Thanks, John. I appreciate that”, he said as they were in the elevator.

“Of course, Yongie. If you need help with something else, just ask. I’ll try to help you as much as I can”, Johnny answered and got out of the elevator as it stopped.

Johnny let the bag fall on the ground as he noticed that Taeyong was still in the elevator, held his hand at the door, and stopped it from closing. Taeyong was holding his head and his eyes were closed.

“Did you take your medication?”, Johnny asked him which Taeyong only answered by shaking his head as a no. He forgot to take the pills, causing him not to sleep enough on the flight. “Where are they?”

Johnny helped Taeyong to get out of the elevator and escorted the weak male to his apartment. He helped Taeyong with taking his medication, all of the boys knew about how many pills he had to take so they were able to help when Taeyong wasn’t in the state to help himself.

It took him a little until he felt better and was able to change his clothes on his own. As he looked at his pale body, he noticed a few bruises. At this point, he was used to getting random bruises on his body, they were everywhere now.

“Do you want me to call someone?”, Johnny asked. “I need to go to the studio, PD-nim said there was an emergency with one of the trainees and they need me.”

“No… I’m fine. Wait, no, call Y/N”, Taeyong then said. “I really hope she’s back here...”, he then murmured to himself. Taeyong told him not to say anything about his illness before he handed his phone to Johnny who pressed on the ‘call’ button as soon as he found your contact.

“Yongie?”, you yawned, making Johnny smile.

“It’s Johnny. I’m a friend of Taeyong. He isn’t feeling well after the flight and I would stay at his place but I have to work. Could you come over and maybe stay here until I’m back?”

“Of course. Would you text me the address? I’ll be there as soon as possible”, you answered without even thinking.

“I will. Thanks for doing this, Y/N. I’m looking forward to meet you soon”, Johnny spoke before he hung up and looked to Taeyong who was still scrunching his face in pain and was lying in his bed. “She will be here in around ten minutes. Do you think you would be able to stay awake?”

“Mhm, I think I’ll make it. You should go. The company is also important”, Taeyong said. As soon as Johnny was out, he started to let out all the coughing he was trying to hold in the whole time. He didn’t want to let Johnny see in what kind of a bad situation he was.

He was coughing with no pause, couldn’t breathe properly and he looked up in a panic as someone knocked at the door after a few minutes. Taeyong tried to get up from his bed and walked to the door, he was coughing badly and was weak.

He opened the door and… collapsed.

It was such a surprise for you to see him collapse right in front of you. You panicked and didn’t know what to do for a moment. You tried to pull him up and did everything you learned in a first-aid course, your whole body was shaking because you were scared. What was going on with him?

Meanwhile, you were talking to the emergency.

While you were waiting, you looked through his apartment, walked around but still stayed close so you can watch him. You found his phone and unlocked it by using his fingerprint. As you went through his contacts, you saw the names Jaemin and Mark, remembering how he told you that he’s going on his vacation with them.

Immediately, you called Jaemin.

“Hyung? What’s up?”, he said with a groggy voice. Probably the man was already sleeping.

“It’s Y/N. I…”, before you were able to continue speaking, you burst into crying. “H-he coll-apsed”, you stuttered out. You finally got yourself together and spoke with a much more stable voice. “I don’t know what’s going on.”

While you were talking to Jaemin and tried to calm down, you were walking around the small apartment. And then, you gasped in shock as you saw a little bit of blood. Maybe he coughed out blood as he was trying to open the door.

“I’ll be right over. Or wait, did you call the emergency? If yes, just text me which hospital you’re going to, I’ll go there directly”, Jaemin then said and you only answered him with a ‘yes’ before you hung up.

Soon, the paramedics arrived and after questioning you about who you are and what you were doing in his apartment and all that, they finally brought him to the ambulance and you got into the car as well, driving to the hospital as fast as possible and you were crying, still didn’t know what was going on in there.

“You didn’t know about this?”, Mark asked you. You looked up and shook your head as a no. “I thought he might’ve told you already. You were talking a lot when we were in Berlin.”

“No. He never mentioned it. I was so surprised when he suddenly collapsed after opening the door. At least, he was able to open the door”, you told him then.

“It surprised me. Seriously. He always talked about you when he was back from Venezia. Talked about how beautiful you were for him. If we didn’t stop him, he even might talk for hours about you even though he only saw you for a second. He truly lo-“

“Where is he?!”, Johnny interrupted Mark in his small speech, not allowing the younger male to tell him that Taeyong loved you.

Before Mark could answer him, the doctor arrived. He seemed sad, disappointed in himself. You felt the fear of hearing bad news about Taeyong’s current state.

“I’m sorry”, the medic said, making your heart beat faster.

“He is currently in a coma.”

taglist ;; @wownajaemin​ @n8dlesoupguk​ 

[bandaigaeru]

gravitational pull - seo changbin

→genre: brief fake dating, childhood friends to weird enemies to fake lovers to real lovers →synopsis: he was a glimmering star of hope until he exploded, suspending your relationship into a seesawing gravity. →pairing: changbin x gender neutral reader →word count: 8.1k →warnings: hyunjins kinda mean at one point, mentions of alcohol

i.

Mulch crunches beneath the adolescent shoes of your classmates. One intention is shared, in this playground warfare, and it’s to get a swing.

You disregard the heap rushing towards the ones closest, for your gaze is set on the far end of the swingset. And it is just within your reach. Your eyes narrow as you outstretch a palm, prepared to feel the coolness of the rusty chain.

The chain sways away from you beneath the harsh touch of another boy.

You stare at him with wide eyes, mouth fallen agape.

He smiles, the plastic seat dipping beneath his weight. “This one’s mine.”

A small shake in your tone as you return, “I was here first.”

“So? Everyone knows this is my swing.”

You slowly nod, taking small footsteps backwards. Hwang Hyunjin is bigger than you. And more accustomed with goons of friends. There’s no point in fighting.

Though as you start for the abandoned monkey bars (their vibrant red paint chipped to a sad haze) with blurry vision faulting your path, a voice booms over the rush between your ears.

You glance in the direction. A short boy sits in a stationary swing, smiling as though it is all he’s ever known. He waves you over.

Taking all of the precautions, you glance over your shoulder to make sure he’s talking to you. When you confirm, you drag your feet along the mulch.

You flinch when he stands, bringing guarding forearms to protect your face. The blow never comes.

“You can take my swing,” he says. You peek at him through your shield. His puffy cheeks are still indented with the smile. And his hands, not balled into a fist, lay calmly at his side.

You blink, slowly lowering your defense. “W-Why?”

He laughs, “That’s what friends are for. Duh.”

The laugh that trembles over your lips is shaky and foreign. You reach for the chain.

“I’ll push you!” he declares, rushing behind you as you steady yourself in the small seat.

He pulls you from the ground, the tips of your shoes trailing back amber woodchips.

The tip of your nose kisses the blue sky. Though, inevitably, the time comes when you must fall back to the earth. Steady hands push against your back, returning you to freedom. You find yourself grinning each time.

The next day, Changbin saves you the swing beside him. He waits until you are ready before kicking off on the ground. You swing in sync, sharing a few glances under the sun’s hugging rays.

It only takes a week before he’s begging his mother to arrange a playdate. And to your luck, he follows through with the promises, meeting you at your doorstep that Saturday. He guides you a block over to his house. He must be a good kid if his mother entrusted him with such a task, bringing two first-graders over. One returning home and one in need of a home away from home.

His mother is extremely nice, smiling at you each time you catch her eyes. She sets a plate of fruit on the coffee table while you and Changbin battle over the next Spongebob episode. His sister comes out of her room, too, asking you whether you prefer Barbies or Matchbox.

Elementary school passes like this. Recess is spent with his presence, as is lunch and gym and any class freetime. On the off days that it rains, barring you inside the school, you play Mancala. It’s totally civil. Not once does Changbin storm off when he loses. He merely shrugs and offers to set up the next round.

So unusual, though each time you find yourself smiling.

After an emotional graduation party—emotional for the teachers and family, you mean—he hands you a small piece of paper.

“What’s this?” you curiously look at him. His tie has loosened since the ceremony and his hair is ruffled by his father’s hand.

“My phone number. I won’t be in town this summer, but I still wanna keep touch with you.”

You smile down at the small digits. Neatly, you fold the post-it before slipping it into your pocket. You wrap your arms around his neck, leaning into his touch as he wraps his arms around your waist. “I’m gonna miss you,” you announce, voice muffled by his shoulder.

“It’s only one summer,” he reassures. “Plus, I’ll bring you back something nice. A keychain or something.”

You laugh through the sting that stabs your body, nodding. One summer cannot mark the end of the world, you tell yourself as you watch his car drift over the hill leading into town.

ii.

On the first, dreaded, day of middle school, you scan the halls carefully. The new faces do not scare you as much as the lack of his does. Each call was sent to voicemail. And each time the dial sounded, you frantically returned the phone to the receiver. Maybe he had accidentally miswrote the number. Or maybe he was too busy to return your calls. Summer has that effect on people, you think, where you have so much fun you forget the things you used to do daily. Like a memory disorder.

You finally see him in the lunch line. A breath of fresh air invades your lungs as you rush over to him.

“Changbin! How was your summer? I called, but you never answered,” you grin, nudging his shoulder.

He does not shoot you a glance, nor does he send a glare. Instead, he keeps his eyes glued on his shoes. A sharp pain strikes your chest—that breath might have been poison.

You gently shove his shoulder again, forcing a shaky laugh as you continue, “Hello? Anyone in there?”

The boy in front of him spins on his heel. His eyes are cold, painful, as they meet yours. “Can’t you tell he doesn’t wanna talk to you?” Hyunjin scoffs. “Go somewhere else, dumbass.”

Hesitantly, you look to Changbin. Surely, he’ll defend you, right?

Right?

His eyes have traveled to the lunch menu, displayed on a TV in cheap font. Far away from this conversation.

You nod, looking back to Hyunjin. His abrasive eyes are still waiting for you, eagerly begging you to move on. “Sorry, then,” you murmur as you start for the bathroom that will become your haven.

Behind you, Hyunjin’s loud laugh taunts you. Hidden beneath it is a quieter one that stabs you in the chest. Something painful blurs your vision, twists your insides, and curls the corners of your lips as you try to fight it.

You were a fool to think he was different. Elementary promises should never be trusted.

Secondary school passes in dreary blinks. Watching Changbin run for class president. Bubbling in his name despite everything. Hearing Changbin got the lead role in Cinderella. Showing up despite the physics test you had to study for.

You wonder momentarily if Newton was behind this twisted feeling in your chest. Drawing you to him—like a moth to a flame. You even scan his sister’s Instagram from time to time, finding a picture of Changbin framed carefully beneath the stars, a twinkle in his eye.

You watch from afar as he accepts his diploma, a careful smile seated on your lips.

A bitter taste haunts your tongue as you pack for college.

“This is good for me,” you mutter to yourself. “I’ll be far, far away from him. I can move on.”

Some things are better left unsaid.

iii.

Awkward introductions replay in your memory as you get ready for your first college class. Seven fifteen, physics with Professor Kim. Denoted as one of the best in the country. Physicist and professor, respectively. It would be a lie to say he didn’t take part in your decision to attend this college. And the ocean, which is only a fifteen minute walk (that’s what the RA told you when you moved in).

You arrive with a hot americano precisely on time.

As you climb the lecture hall’s steps, your eyes drift among the sea of unfamiliar faces. One in particular sticks out—a glimmer of hope among the trenches. You raise a hand to wave, a smile quirking your lips. But, at the face directly next to him, you drift back.

Evidently, you didn’t move far enough.

You stand at the edge of the aisle, glancing down at the empty seat. “Hey, is this spot empty?”

Hope looks back at you with shock glazing his features. “Oh my God, Y/N! Of course. I didn’t know you decided to come here,” Minho smiles, tugging his notebook closer to allow you more room.

You pull out the chair, glancing at the boy on the other side of him. “I didn’t really tell anyone where I was going.”

He fills the silence with his tales of life, occasionally glancing at Changbin to see if he wants to add something. Each time, he is met with the boy’s indifferent profile. Mindlessly scrolling through his phone, though not once stopping to read one of the passing captions or like a picture.

Professor Kim claps, fizzling any remaining conversation. The syllabus fades in your mind as you wonder how Changbin’s summer went. Maybe he spent it with his sister. Or perhaps he accompanied a love interest to a string of dates.

This thought shoots a concoction of contradicting emotions through your heart. You return distracted eyes to Professor Kim just as he’s dismissing class, burying a content fist into the customly tailored pocket of his navy suit. Minho turns to you immediately, filling your ears with proposals to coffee and lunch and maybe you could come to the dorm later and catch up. Changbin’s ears perk up as he begs for Minho’s eyes.

For a split second, his eyes fall on you before they dart away.

“I need to get back to my dorm,” you announce when you can finally slip into Minho’s breaths of pause. “My roommate’s waiting.”

“Who’s your roommate? Maybe we know him.”

You fight a laugh when he finally glances back at Changbin, who has long since given up. “His name’s Yang Jeongin.”

iv.

While Minho is overly focused on you, begging you to tell him what happened after he moved in tenth grade, Changbin pretends you do not exist. When the conversations trail outside of the lecture hall, he clings to Minho’s side but does not speak. His eyes stay glued to the sidewalk. Or his textbook, whose cover he seems very invested in.

So when Professor Kim announces a project, your heart thumps a little too fast.

Minho grabs your arm, “Be my partner?”

Changbin kicks his leg. “Dude.”

He glances back at him, as though nothing he has said goes against him. “What? Just join our group.”

Changbin’s eyes find yours reluctantly. They ignite a spark in your fingertips as you reach for a pen. “Can I?”

You smile as your head twitches in a nod. “Of course.”

The plan is this: meet at the library on October 15th (a Saturday, you realize) at 1 P.M. “Expect to be there long, I wanna get this done ASAP,” Minho adds as he downs the rest of your americano.

When the day finally comes, despite your daily prayers that time would somehow freeze or somehow skip over the day, you leave your dorm right when you need to. Early October aids a brusque breeze, and you wrap your jacket around you as you approach the small crosswalk. Your phone buzzes in your pocket, and you dread the inevitable message.

Lee Minho [12:59 P.M.]: Sorry guys, I can’t make it. Mama Lee’s in town and wants to see her favorite son.

It’s too late to go home, you realize, when shoes scrape against the cement and a sigh penetrates the silence. “I cannot stand him,” the voice mutters behind you.

You turn to him, offering pitied condolences with a small smile. “Just the two of us, huh?”

He nods. “Guess so.”

A loud hum draws closer as his foot leans down for the asphalt. You look to the source, seeing a red car barreling down the street. You gasp, grabbing Changbin’s sleeve and tugging him back on the sidewalk. The horn echoes in the back of your head like an alarm.

His eyes are wide when they find yours. “T-Thank you,” he stutters, cocking his head a little. As though, for the first time, he is taking in your appearance.

You realize your grip is still tight on his wrist and you let go, tensing up. “You’re welcome.”

In the library, you work in silence. As though nothing happened outside. As though your entire history lies merely within the timespan of a few weeks. Minho serving as the mutual friend to your forced, awkward friendship.

He shoots you a dizzying look as he turns his packet to you. “Can you look this over?”

The tip of your eraser taps a number. “This has to be meters per second, not centimeters per second.”

A small sigh tumbles over his bottom lip as he realizes, “That’s why the final answer looked so weird. Thank you.”

The corner of your lip must have an opposite gravity to it, because it curls upward without intent.

v.

Returning to class the next Monday leaves the soft hint of a calm lavender in the air. You share a quick, almost childish, glance with Changbin before settling back into the tune of physics. Newtons and joules and all the fun things that make up energy.

The next few weeks pass with a quiet hum, one that hangs in the background and, if you lose sight of it, you’re scared you’ll lose it forever. It’s a time of your life where you will look back with a sigh and whisper, “How did I not realize how good I had it?”

At your peak, you fall onto your bed on a Friday night. Jeongin scribbles impatient homework answers while your eyes fall shut.

The storm of your phone blaring its tune awakes you.

Lee Minho calls to remind you that he expects you to arrive at his ‘rager of a birthday party.’ He tells you the address, enthusiastically repeating himself (like an auctioneer) as you try to find a pad of paper. Jeongin’s jumping up to fix his hair before you even hang up.

You’re really not sure what you expect as you drag your roommate in tow towards the destination. Though, when you feel the tremble of music and hear shouts from the lawn of the frat house, you somehow know you’re in the right place.

The foyer is packed with jumping bodies. Leaning on the stairs, a red solo cup in hand, is the man of the hour. His cheeks are dusted in a light coating of heat and, as you approach him, you notice that glitter brushes soft highlights along his cheekbones.

“Happy early birthday!” you shout over the music.

He dizzily turns to you and drags you towards his chest in a swift motion. “Y/N! Thank you for coming!”

You had no choice. It was either come to the party or admit yourself to Lee Minho’s terrifying grudge list.

Despite this, you return with a grin, “Of course!”

When he lets you go into the stale air, he shoves his cup into your hand. “Try some,” he nods.

You tip the plastic to your lips. As the liquid scrapes the back of your throat, you flinch back. “What is this?” Your face twists.

“Just vodka and Coke.”

You hastily return the cup to him and glance around. Jeongin has disappeared to a desolate corner, you presume. A spark of jealousy runs through your veins.

“Where’s the bathroom?” you find yourself asking Minho.

He points down a vacant hallway and tells you it’s the last door on your left. You thank him before scurrying in that direction.

Your knock echoes, though nothing returns. The pale wood feels cold against your cheek as you listen for any life inside. You find it safe to enter. Instantly, you press your palms against the cold marble. Identical eyes stare into each other in the mirror until your eyes slip to the pale, spotless basin. You stare into the milky dome absently, pondering why you feel so odd being here. And for a moment you forget where you are, lost in the dizzying world of your thoughts.

Until you hear the choked sob from behind the shower curtain.

It takes you by surprise. Hesitantly, you reach out for the navy shield.

“Ch-Changbin?” you stutter, staring down at the boy in a mess of shock.

His legs are drawn to his chest as trails of tears line his cheeks. He lets out a squeak as he looks up to you. Arms fall to his sides as he leans forward. Though, he appears to have no intention of stopping, surrendering himself to gravity.

Your hands find his shoulders merely moments before his nose slams into the porcelain. “Are you drunk?” you whisper.

Though, in return, he sobs. “I’m sorry.”

Something pierces your chest. Your lips part to say something, but the words are clogged in your throat.

“I was such an idiot,” he slurs, swaying gently.

“What’re you talking about?” you finally ask.

His balled fist slams against the tub. “You!” he shouts, face twisting as he releases another cry.

You flinch back.

“My mom always asks how you’re doing, no matter how many times I tell her. My sister still has a grudge. Hell, even Hwang Hyunjin thinks I’m an idiot and he’s the one who tricked me into leaving you!”

He leans his cheek against the wall, once again releasing a cry. Though, this one, he fights to hold back. It scalds the air in a whimper.

Quieter, he admits, “You were the only person I’ve ever felt safe with.”

You sigh, looking down at your shoes. Those days when you wondered what had gone wrong, staring up at your blank ceiling and trying to relive his smile as quiet tears fell to your pillow, wash down the drain.

He watches intently as you climb into the tub. You do not look at him as you slowly lean against the wall he rests his cheek on. Instead, you stare at the mahogany finish of the small cabinets. Regardless, you can feel his eyes burning holes into your cheek. In this cold porcelain cage, all you can hear is the distant thumping of music and the occasional sniffle from the boy beside you. You smile at the familiarity of it, returning you to your former years cozied up on a playground. No worries back then, you jealously note with a muted snicker.

“I missed you,” you finally say. Tears blur your vision, warping the defined lines of wood into a mess of color.

When you bring yourself to look at him, his eyes are closed. You lean a little closer to see if he’s sleeping. Reluctant lips part as he whispers, his breath hot and reeking of tequila, “I missed you too.”

vi.

One of the things you come to realize is that Changbin’s smile has never changed. There’s still that little indent where his cheeks fold over and each time he offers a glimpse at it you are returned to the days of the swing.

Thanks to the drunken night (half drunken night, you should say, since he had enough for both of you), Changbin has allowed a sneak peek back to his life. Strictly over text, though. You’re not sure why he’s never asked to meet up—maybe it’s too much too fast, you think—but you cannot find it in you to complain. He’s back after all these years and that seems to be enough.

So you endure it, texting him until the early hours of the morning and fascinating yourself over all of these things you have missed.

Seo Changbin [2:39 A.M.]: My sister and I went to the elementary school a couple of weeks ago.

Looking at your phone burns your eyes, as does the weird feeling in your chest.

Y/N [2:40 A.M.]: Really? Has it changed much?

Seo Changbin [2:40 A.M.]: The kids after us got all the cool playground equipment :(

Seo Changbin [2:40 A.M.]: I should take you there one day haha. I think that’d be fun.

You fight the giggle that wishes to flee, glancing up at a sleeping Jeongin for reassurance.

Waking up in the morning is aided with fleeting regrets, though beneath it you realize there is a small skip in your step. One that flares a heat in your face when you walk into the physics classroom and reach to meet Changbin’s eyes. And there, waiting, is his gaze and a small smile.

Maybe you have it bad for Seo Changbin, you think, as Professor Kim begins talking about Newton’s Third Law.

vii.

Yang Jeongin is broadcasting his homework onto the cheap projector he bought on Amazon for $50. “Isn’t it so cool?” he marvels as his red pen underlines a key part of his notes.

You absently nod, glaring at your textbook. Between the lines is a screaming thought that cascades a waterfall of forget towards your upcoming exam. You fail to notice your phone buzzing against your bed. Daydreams are dangerous like that.

“Y/N,” Jeongin’s voice finally snaps you out of it. You look to him, standing at the door and lazily holding the knob. “You’ve got a visitor.”

Your heart leaps in your chest as you rush to take his spot. Before you can tug the door open, he presses a hand on your shoulder. “Be careful around him, please.”

You watch as he struts and flops down on his bed, opening a comic book above his head.

As you open the door, a little more hesitant than before the interaction with Jeongin, you smile.

Changbin is watching the end of your hall and playing with the sleeves of his hoodie. When he senses your presence, he finally breaks his trance and offers a smile. He keeps his voice low, “Can I talk to you?”

You nod, ignoring the annoying thump thump of your heart, “Sure. What’s up?”

“In private,” he adds, peeking over your head at Jeongin. Maintaining his hold on the comic book, though his eyes have drifted to you with a parental glare.

You shut the door behind you. His footsteps draw towards the common area, and you follow. There’s a silence draped over you until he abruptly stops in the middle of the hallway and turns to you. “I need you to pretend to date me.”

You blink. “W-What?”

He draws his bottom lip between his teeth momentarily before continuing, “I made a stupid bet and I kind of really need the money.”

A shroud of toughness hides your instant willingness to help. “What do I get out of this?”

His eyes radiate the innocence of a child. They draw you to a distant memory, one that you might have seen in a movie and forced into a memory, but you’re not sure. You were at his house after he broke his arm and he cried, those same eyes staring at you as he whined about how much it hurt. And how itchy his arm was beneath the cast.

Your heart softens, and you have to fight the crumbling beneath your feet.

“Whatever you want,” he assertively nods. “Seriously.”

You sigh. “Do you have a plan?”

“I always have a plan,” he smiles, pulling you into a grateful hug. His hoodie smells vaguely of ramen with a hint of sealike cologne you might find in Lee Minho’s bathroom. You find yourself smiling as your hands rest on his back.

viii.

His hand, admittedly, feels a little odd in your hand. The last time you had held his hand was in second grade, when you went to the zoo on a field trip. Your class was already flooding into the bird exhibit with anticipation and exuberance. But you were crying your eyes out at the mere thought of seeing a parrot. (This unfounded fear is all thanks to Spongebob)

Changbin’s hand slipped into yours and slowly urged you in, mumbling that if you didn’t go you’d get stuck there forever. And then, he had whispered, the parrots might eat us alive. Even then, his hand was oddly clammy and a little sticky.

But now, as he guides you through the small neighborhood, you feel a calm mix of elation and awkwardness. Sure, this is groundbreaking material for you and your “small” crush on him. However, he’s not doing this because he likes you. He’s doing this because he needs some cash and you were a means of aiding him.

“Where are we going?” you ask, a cloud of your breath expanding from your lips. It’s only the beginning of November.

“You’ll see,” he glances over at you, a small smile painted on his pale cheeks.

There’s a small line of shrubs on your side of the sidewalk. Serving as a break in them is a metal archway, accompanied by a small wooden sign reading: Gyeonghwa Park. He turns into it, guiding you into the small fenced area. A two person swing set stands in the corner, absent seats trembling in the breeze. There’s a few wooden benches, though most are tainted in a layer of leaves.

“Ta-da,” he says, gesturing with his free arm at the small park.

You look around to the little duck statue in the corner. “I don’t mean to be rude, but why are we here again?” you turn to him. His hand burns against your skin like a constant reminder.

“I can’t take you to our playground, so I thought we could settle for here as our first fake date,” he smiles. “Plus, we need couple pictures and I think this works well.”

You’re grateful for the breeze that dashes pink across your cheeks, disguising the heat that has rushed to them at his words. “R-Right,” you stutter.

He takes a seat on a leafless bench and slips his phone from his pocket. As you reluctantly sit beside him, you watch as he sends texts to his friends. Nothing regarding you, you presume, but when he feels your eyes he quickly closes the chat.

The pictures are poised carefully, his arm resting on the top of the bench behind you, your head tilted towards his as you smile. Without warning, he presses his lips to your cheek as the shutter clicks. You try not to make your flinch obvious.

He pulls back, smiling slightly as he inquires, “Should we kiss to seal the deal?”

Fire poisons your veins as you stare back at him. The invisible mark his lips had left sizzles in the air. “Do you think we should?” you whisper.

He shrugs. “It’ll make it a bit more believable. We don’t have to if you’re not comfortable, though.”

You shake your head. “No, it’s fine. Kiss me.”

The corners of his lips upturn a little further, sending a shiver down your spine—though maybe it was just the wind. He readjusts his phone, glancing to assure you’re both in frame, before leaning in. At first, his lips merely wander in the air before yours, as though he is thinking about the best way to do this. But then, confident lips press against yours. His touch melts away the numbness in your fingers, the shiver of the cold. In this moment of freedom, you wonder if he had ever wondered what your lips tasted like. Because you sure have.

ix.

Each of your fake dates is constructed with careful attention to detail. A trip to the movies (seeing a film you had mentioned wanting to see very briefly over text). A study ‘date’ that didn’t really feel romantic, though he brought you an americano and a fancy pen he stole from his dad’s work.

But your date today is very special. The diner is filled to the brim with hungry college students and elderly couples. In the back, bunched up against the upholstery, are Changbin’s friends. They throw their heads back to laugh as one tells a stupid joke. Changbin leads you down the aisle slowly. He squeezes your hand, whispering over his shoulder, “Thank you, again, for doing this. It means a lot.”

You smile against your will,“That’s what friends are for.”

As you approach, the new and familiar faces turn to you. Some hold smiles, others hold gaping lips.

“I didn’t think you actually found someone willing to date you,” a boy marvels.

“Let alone Y/N! How come I didn’t know you were dating?” Minho shouts, garnering certain harsh looks from neighboring booths.

A glimmering smile finds your lips as you slide into the booth beside him, “You never asked.”

He scoffs. “Am I supposed to ask when anything life-changing happens?”

Changbin files in beside you, sighing, “Not necessarily, but you talk a lot.”

“How long have you been dating?” a boy across from you asks. His cheeks are dusted with light freckles, and a friendly smile paints across his lips.

“Nearly two months,” you glance at Changbin, who nods. The finer details, he stressed, must be known like the back of your hand. A single hair out of place could be the end.

“Are you serious?” Minho booms. His eyes are wide and his lips are parted. Even his eyebrows raise in awe, scratching dull wrinkles across his forehead.

“You do talk a lot,” you mumble.

Before Minho can have the chance to shout profanities aiding his awe, another boy sighs. “Shut up and congratulate them, okay? This is karma for laughing at him when he wanted in on the bet.”

“Thank you, Chan,” Changbin smiles, wrapping an adept arm around your shoulder. Instinctively, you lean into his touch, resting your head on his shoulder.

As the night unfolds, queued by digging questions and the occasional groan from Minho, you nearly forget that this is an act. That when Changbin presses a kiss to your forehead it’s not real.

Outside of the diner, as his friends disperse into their means of transportation, he cups your cheeks and presses a soft kiss to your lips. When he parts, there’s a small smile and a gloss hanging over his eyes. “Thank you,” he whispers.

x.

He promises to pick you up at five. All that remains is the reward, you realize. A simple favor has brought you here, waiting impatiently for his knock on your door. Your heart beats harshly against your chest.

“Why are you even messing with him?” Jeongin mutters, stirring his ramen with the tips of his chopsticks.

You glance up at him, sighing, “I’m not messing with him. I’m doing him a favor.”

“Yeah, but, why? He’s an asshole, Y/N,” he shakes his head. As he shoves the steaming noodles into his mouth, he hisses at the heat and tilts his head to the side.

You watch him as he gulps down water.

At your prolonged silence, he adds, “When is he supposed to pick you up?”

You tap your phone screen, illuminating the time. “Five minutes ago.”

Jeongin drowns his harsh words with more noodles. Though, in between bites, he says, “Maybe he’s standing you up.”

The thought has crossed your mind, though a hollow in your chest wants to believe he wouldn’t do that. Friends, if that’s what you are, don’t do that.

Seconds drift into minutes. And minutes turn into an hour. Jeongin’s gone through three more ramen cups. Your lips ache as you nervously bite them, jumping for your phone at each notification.

At half past six, Jeongin rests into your bed beside you. “I’m sorry,” he whispers as he wraps a cautious arm around your shoulder.

Though, you do not feel anything aside from the irritation blurring your eyes. “Are you okay?” he asks. These simple words open the floodgate.

xi.

His eyes avert yours as though they had never known you in the first place. Minho doesn’t say anything when you lower yourself in the seat beside him. Instead, he cautiously slips you a small note. Large, scratchy words read: are you okay?

You crumble the note in your palm before tucking it into your bag. He does not bother you for the rest of class. Class travels by in grueling moments. Professor Kim’s voice seems slowed, stripped of any tone. When he finally dismisses class, warning that the semester is ending soon, you haphazardly shove your things into your bag and leave.

Over your shoulder, you hear a low smack and Minho mutter, “What the hell is the matter with you?”

It hurts to admit, given that you had known from the beginning, but Seo Changbin used you. Though, despite the anger you should be feeling, you can only find yourself wondering what he needed the money so badly for.

Back at the dorm, Jeongin silently pulls a piece of cake from the small fridge and hands it to you. “Here,” he mumbles. “My friend made it for you.”

You look up at him. “Why?” Your voice is raw from desuetude, crackles like an old radio.

Jeongin bites his lip, eyes slipping to your comforter. “I told him you were having a rough time. Plus, he knows Changbin, so he knows the story.”

You take the paper plate in your fingertips, dragging it toward you. You poke the delicacy with the tip of your fork. “What’s the story?”

A sigh slips past his lips. “That you guys dated and you broke up. That’s all Changbin told them.”

You nod. He must’ve gotten the money and thrown you away.

Your phone buzzes against the mattress. Jeongin leans over to check who it is. When his eyes meet yours again, he informs, “It’s just Minho.”

So you allow yourself to look at your phone.

Lee Minho [9:20 A.M.]: I’m outside your dorm. Let me in please.

You look up to the door, though your energy is below zero. Jeongin grabs your phone, reading the message, before going to answer the door.

“Hey, Jeongin,” Minho pushes past him. He sits at the foot of your bed. “What happened?”

You blink, eyes staring into his absently. “What?”

“With Changbin. Tell me what happened, please. He won’t tell us anything and I’m starting to get worried for both of you. He’s never this quiet and you’re never this sulky,” he reluctantly rests his hand on your knee.

You look at Jeongin, who stands there with arms against his chest. He shrugs, silently telling you it’s up to you.

You sigh. “Where do I start?”

“The beginning, preferably.”

“I think I fell in love with him, but I can’t tell you when. Maybe it was when we were kids. Maybe it was at the party when he apologized,” you slowly say. The words do not feel like yours. A small pit rumbles in your stomach, begging you to continue. “He wanted a favor, to pretend to date him for that bet you guys made. I didn’t ask why he needed the money or why I should do this for him, given all he did to me. I just went with it. And things were great, as far as fake relationships go.”

In your break of silence, you find yourself smiling at all the fake dates. You wonder if the pictures still live in his phone or if he discarded them the moment he got rid of you.

“So you guys faked the whole thing?” Minho’s eyebrows furrow.

You nod. “He was supposed to pick me up on Saturday, but he stood me up. And now we’re here.”

Minho blinks. “Either Changbin’s a good actor or he’s a fucking asshole.”

“It’s the latter,” Jeongin announces as he crosses to his bed.

Minho shakes his head. “I’ll talk to him.”

“Don’t tell him what I said,” you rush. “About loving him or anything.”

“I won’t. I promise.”

After he leaves, Jeongin loudly sighs. “I knew you were in love with him.”

You look at him, slowly nodding, “I didn’t really make an effort to hide it.”

xii.

There are tears irritating your skin as you pull yourself out of bed. Surviving off of Felix’s cake and Jeongin’s ramen cups is less than attractive, but you cannot build enough will to leave your dorm. You ask Minho to take notes in physics for you and he quickly obliges, no questions asked.

Changbin, still, plagues your mind like venom. Each time you think maybe a nap is in order, you shut your eyes and see his smile. Or you’ll think of his lips on yours as he smiles into the kiss. Your eyes shoot open, chest rising heavily. Even when you stare at your ceiling too long, your brain deems it a screen for a memory to play. Casted like Jeongin’s cheap projector.

There was this once, in fourth grade when you grew bored of the swings so you relocated to the plastic blue tunnel. He blocked off one end while you took the other. On hotter days, you’d lay on top of the tunnel. One day, he looked at you across the plastic and asked, “Do you ever think we’ll be grown ups far away from each other?”

You shook your head so confidently. “No. We’re gonna live together. Like roommates.”

Jeongin comes home from his classes with a cup of coffee. He sets it on your nightstand as he whispers, “I’m spending the night at Chan’s tonight. Call me if you need anything.”

You take a sip of the americano. “Thanks, have fun.”

In his wake is a dreaded silence that reminds you of Changbin’s laugh. Time has only plagued it with a dash of depth.

Your phone buzzes. Hesitantly, you roll over and grab it. The metal is cold against your fingers.

Lee Minho [4:29 P.M.]: Hey, I need you to come to the beach. There’s something I want to show you.

The thing that tipped you over the edge when looking for a college was the beach. As you carefully scouted, the grains of sand kept drawing you back. It’s ironic as you realize that you haven’t been once, despite its proximity. You can already feel the bitter cold against your cheeks as you rise from your bed. Dots of dizziness scatter across your eyes.

The mid November air is cooler than you expected as you step out of the complex. You shove balled fists deeper into your hoodie pocket.

The walk to the beach is shorter than you had expected, only passing ten minutes. You see Minho waiting on the wooden slats leading to the sand. He jumps to preserve his heat.

“Hey,” you call out to him.

He looks to you, daring to unveil a pale hand as he waves. When you’re closer he says, “It’s fucking cold out here.”

You nod, looking out onto the vacant sand. Huddled like a speck of trash is a small figure.

“Why’d you want to meet out here?” you return to look at him, a piercing cold slashing your heart at the realization.

His face softens as he glances out towards the black speck in the sand. “Well, he wanted to meet you here but he wasn’t sure if you’d come if he texted. So he dragged me out here.”

You find yourself laughing. “And you agreed?”

“I didn’t know it was negative twenty out here,” he mutters. “So go and talk to him so I can get back in my car.”

You smile. Your heart thunders against your chest and, even though you know you shouldn’t, your feet move towards the small figure. He tugs you in, time and time again.

You glance over your shoulder when you reach him. Minho’s already gone, as though his presence was merely a ghost. You squat next to Changbin, wrapping your arms around your knees.

He looks at you, though you keep focused on the pale water. Brushing up on the sand, pulling back into the ocean.

“I’m sorry,” he says.

You nod. “You always say that.”

“I really am,” he admits. “I know you probably think I’m an asshole, reasonably so, but I really am sorry for everything.”

You finally look at him. “What’d you need the money for?”

He’s taken aback. He had expected more of a heartbreaking confession, a perspective he had not once explored. “Music equipment,” he says. “It’s really for me, Chan, and Jisung.”

You nod, looking back at the water. “I was just a ragdoll so you could get that.”

“Not really,” he whispers. “It was kinda a double positive for me.”

Furrowed eyebrows turn back to him.

“I got the money,” he starts, “and I also got the luxury of pretending to be yours.”

You blink. Your voice is small, barely audible over a gust of wind, “What?”

“Every time I did something stupid that got in between us, I always knew I’d find my way back to you. I was the tide and you were the moon, reaching out and tugging me back into reality. Time and time again, as we’ve come to understand,” he nods, glancing at his red fingers, bitten by the air.

You stare at him. “So why do you keep pushing me away?”

He shrugs. “There was always the fear that you didn’t want to bring me back.”

You scoff, remembering your childhood and the way he kept drawing you closer. You shake your head, words failing you.

“So truly, I am so sorry. You still have your end of the deal, you know. You get whatever you want. You can tell me to fuck off and I’ll go home. Sure, I’d be a little heartbroken, but-”

You cut him off, “Why would I ever do that?”

“Because I treat you like shit to fuel this stupid ideology that you don’t hate me,” he admits. “Even when I don’t try to be, I’m a selfish asshole. I only kissed you because I wanted to, not because of the stupid pictures for the bet. I only asked you for the favor because I wanted to paint this stupid little picture in my head. I only stood you up because I couldn’t bring myself to face you and admit that my stupid fantasy was over.”

“That’s not selfish,” you say. “That’s just very Seo Changbin of you.”

“I really cannot tell if you hate my guts or not,” he sighs, picking up a handful of sand and watching as it trickles down again.

You shake your head. “Minho didn’t tell you.”

“Tell me what?”

You look back at the empty space where the ghost once stood. A sigh of a distant nostalgia slips from your lips—the times you’ve pictured this moment over and over in your daydreams. However, you did not imagine the bitter bite of the wind nipping at your cheeks. “That I’m in love with you.”

“You what?” he gawks, leaning a bit closer. As though his ears deceive him.

Your eyes return to his as you nod. “I love you. I probably have since we were kids. That’s the only reason I agreed to your favor. Because I, too, wanted to be a little selfish.”

His lips slowly curl up into a smile as he releases an abrasive laugh. “How much did Minho pay you to say that?”

“He didn’t. I’m being completely honest. Why else would I be here if I wasn’t stupidly in love with you, huh?”

“Really?”

“Yes, now can we speed this up? It’s fucking cold out here.”

He presses his lips against yours. You expect them to mold against yours like they had in previous weeks, but now they are fiery. It sends tingles down your spine as he cups your cheek. With those internal feelings finally suspended from your body, you can sigh a breath of relief.

You wonder if younger you would be proud.

xiii.

“Are you guys actually dating now or are you just fucking with us again?” one of Changbin’s friends, Jisung, asks as you slide into the same booth as a few weeks ago.

“They are,” Minho intervenes. “I watched them confess and everything. Like a minister.”

“Bullshit,” you mutter. “You went back to your car as soon as I got there.”

Changbin’s laugh tickles against your ear as he scoots in next to you.

“Well, I guess it’s a good thing we didn’t revoke the award,” the freckled boy, who you’ve now concluded is Felix, observes.

“Why?” Jisung asks, bringing the straw of his soda to his lips.

“Because we would have had to give it right back.”

His friends are very welcoming of you, despite the deception that marked your first greeting. Chan catches you in the parking lot as Changbin and Jisung fight over the extra mint the server placed on the table.

“I just want you to know,” he starts with a smile, “that he really loves you. It’s not a front, I promise.”

Your eyes crinkle at the corners as you ask, “Those are suspicious words. How should I trust you?”

“Because he talks about you all the time. I know more about your childhood than I know about mine. Plus, he’s written three songs about you and we don’t even have the equipment to record anything yet.”

You laugh, “You’re in luck, then.”

His eyebrows furrow. “Why?”

You smile, shaking your head. “You’ll find out.”

Changbin returns to your side, a sullen scowl pressed against his lips as he watches Jisung pop the mint into his mouth. Chan dismisses himself to attend to Felix attempting to teach Minho a taekwondo move.

You look over at Changbin, “You’ve written songs about me?”

His eyes widen, “No? Why would I ever do that?”

A giggle bubbles up from your stomach as you shake your head, starting off to his car. Behind you, he repeats the same question urgently.

xiv.

Seo Changbin is like a pest that flies around your head, begging your attention at all moments of the day. He invited you over to his dorm so you could study together, though when you arrived with your textbook and notes, he appeared offended.

“What?” you asked as you settled on his bed, fluffing pillows before leaning against them.

“Studying doesn’t mean studying, it means cuddling,” he pouted.

It’s lucky for him that Minho isn’t home because if he ever heard those words falling from his lips, he’d never hear the end of it.

So that’s why you’re laying your head on his pillow, his arms wrapped tightly around your waist as you read over your notes.

“What’s the formula for Newton’s law of universal gravitation?” you quiz him when you feel his arms start to loosen with the temptation of sleep.

He hums, “I don’t know. You’re the one with the strong magnetic force. Shouldn’t they call it Y/N’s law of universal gravitation?”

You sigh, setting the spiral notebook on his nightstand before you turn in his arms to face him. The hint of a smile already greets you. You press a soft kiss to the tip of his nose. “What’s your grade in physics?”

He looks up at the ceiling as he pretends to think. “38.”

“What?” you hiss, pulling back away from him as though he has an illness you didn’t know about.

“Hey, don’t look at me like that,” he whines, pulling you back. “I only signed up for the class because it reminded me of you.”

You smile. “Why?”

He shyly pouts, “I may have gone out of my way to hear about you when we were in high school.”

“And you never thought to apologize?” you counter, your smile still reigning.

“You looked like you were doing fine without me,” he shyly admits.

“Changbin,” you shake your head. “I had no friends after Minho moved. I chased after you, thinking maybe something would happen.”

He closes his eyes. “Tell me you didn’t see me in Cinderella.”

“I saw you in Cinderella,” you laugh.

He throws his head back and whines. “The pants they put me in were two sizes too big.”

The memory of him standing on stage and having to hold up his pants, disguising it by having his hands on his hips, brings another laugh to the air. “Did they really not have any clothespins or anything?”

“No!” he exclaims, looking back into your eyes. “Fucking Hyunjin was hoarding them all!”

You feel the vibrations of your laugh against the pillow. It’s good being like this, having him tethered close.

He’s in the middle of saying something, probably further pursuing his complaints about high school or Hyunjin, but you do not care. You press your lips against his. A moment of stillness, thanks to his shock, before he kisses you back.

The only word to describe this feeling brewing in your stomach: bliss. Pure, hot bliss.

You hope gravity will keep you grounded here.