#i didnt read the whole thing so hopefully it was bc he genuinely didnt like her then but he seriously reads like an old man

[twentyfivemiceinatrenchcoat]

hey ari!!! hope ur doing super well <33 i dropped by to ask u a few things…….

let me know whenever u find the time to read my gojo fic… i made a few revisions over time and i’d rlly love to hear ur thoughts o valued gojo lover ;; its become very important to me , but no pressure :33

AND. need ur most brainrotting thoughts about sashishu por favor. for. research. yeah… research 🙇‍♂️

riko !!!! i hope ur doing super super well urself, im doing just fine <33 trying to finish this fic im writing so i can (hopefully) post it today pshjdh BUT its going good so far !!

i know i alr said it but !! i am so so excited to read ur gojo fic !! if i dont have time today then i will tmrw 🙏🙏 cant wait to rb it w a huge rant i took a lil peek at it n i can already tell its gonna be so good….

AND RIKO. tysm i appreciate u like no other, ive been waiting for a chance to rant abt my Absolute Beloveds……… this might get long im sorry but sashisu make me. genuinely insane

OK SO. just generally speaking…… to me, the biggest sashisu appeal is just. how grounded they are. to me. i feel like both jjk trios are very realistic but in different ways!!

like. the 2018 trio are just !! good friends and they care for each other and they have fun together. AND most importantly; they can be open w each other !! like all three of them are a lillll closed off and obviously traumatized but they can still be sincere with one another. yuji talks openly w both megumi and nobara, megumi’s whole arc revolves around him getting comfortable with the idea of leaning on others and being saved by others, and nobara’s whole character hinges on her just being unabashedly herself.

AND I LOVE THEM i really do but sashisu r just so….. different and also similar and they feel so real to me even though theyre all insane in the head.

because contrary to the 2018 trio, theyre all sort of. Cunts pshjdhd. LIKE. high school satoru is a brat and he thinks he can make friends by being a bully and hes kind despite that but hes also sooo infuriating, and suguru acts like hes better but hes rly not. theyre both assholes. same w shoko!! shes literally out here casually underage smoking and all three of them get in trouble n then blame it on each other n its just…. theyre just so fun. they bully each other but u can TELL theres love there.

and the greatest difference between the 2018 and 2006trio is that the former can be open with each other, but the latter cant. sashisu are doomed as a trio because theyre all so closed off and traumatized and repressed and they will never be as sincere with each other as yuji/megumi/nobara are.

and to me, thats the main reason why suguru defects !! not that its their fault, but the fact that they didnt notice — or maybe the fact that they DID notice but didnt know how to broach the subject — is the one factor that makes his defection almost unavoidable to me. because his best friends, his most loved people, were never the type to be vulnerable like that. and neither was he !!

theyre just so DOOMED riko….. suguru couldnt open his heart to satoru or shoko, satoru didnt notice suguru’s silence bc he was too busy making himself strong enough to protect them, and we dont know how shoko felt but she obviously didnt do anything even if she did notice smth was off. neither of them saw how much suguru was suffering, and suguru was extremely depressed and isolated and never once gave them the chance to help him.

the three of them just werent the type to have heartfelt conversations in the same way the other trio does, and i think sashisu just… figured they didnt need to. that they had that bond together and that it would always be enough. bc all three of them have these incredible powers that make them isolated and kind of miserable, but they were able to be kids only when they were together. during that one year, they got to feel that slice of normalcy and genuine friendship.

and then they lost it !! and shoko and satoru both regret it !!! and they were never able to hate suguru, and he was never able to hate them, even at the very end !!! and the thing that always breaks me is that its just so, so evident that they all loved each other. but it wasnt enough !! and i think thats such a …. grounded and real depiction of how it can be to love someone who’s ill, or traumatized, while you yourself are ill or traumatized. and you might love each other, and it might still not be enough. but the fact that the love was there still matters.

they were three child soldiers who only found comfort in each other, and they all crumbled under the weight of the world but even at the very end they still loved each other.

and for sashisu, that love never disappeared — both shoko and satoru became more responsible after suguru left, and together theyre able to protect so many of the students and their coworkers. and theyre still traumatized and arguably even MORE repressed but the two of them still stick together, and theres a comfort in knowing theyll always have that. (im ignoring the current manga arc its not canon to me idc)

THIS IS ALREADY SO LOONNGG i just. i ADORE them. theyre so good. but !! if we’re moving past just general analysis of them then !! i love to think abt…. sashisu x reader……. maybe one day ill finish my sss x reader series psjdjdj but !!!

i just think itd be such a fun n comfortable dynamic ?? bc they all complete each other in a way…. satoru is just kinda hyper n cuddly n sweet, n suguru is calm and teasing n warm…. and shoko is so chill but also so caring and . i Need them. all of them r so gorgeous i would fall to my knees and cry if i just saw them relaxing by the couch.

i feel like a reader dynamic w them would just be the four of u living together and spending the rest of ur lives doing the same things u did in high school….. going to karaoke n getting in trouble and eating food . etc etc. maybe getting a couple cats…. and a bunch of plants that would all die if it werent for suguru pshjdjs.

in conclusion they make me feel ill <3

(also riko…. pls read the pink lighter by nosferatui, its a sashisu fix-it time travel fic and its one of my favorites ever !! i still havent finished it but its complete and it genuinely changed my life the writing is so good it hurts)

[gluion]

hi best friend!!!

1. my favorite fic of yours - the sunwo fic which is also the first fic of yours ive ever read but istg the whole concept of it was so interesting and new !!!

3. the best character youve written for - imo u write sunwoo rlly well but also senior jacob w his van <33 owns my heart

8. what i like most abt your writing - that each fic has a deeper meaning/purpose and its not just a love plot but always has something a bit more that makes me think

11. something i hope you write - my sweet romantic eric request uhm...

14. a fic i didnt expect to like so much - your changmin series!!! I didnt originally expect to like the childhood romance trope bc i feel like ive read it so many times already but ur take on it was so fresh and cute and enjoyable to read!!:)

BAR T_____T OH I HAVE SO MUCH TO SAY </3

first off, i'm still so happy to know that you like that fic :') i have this weird love-hate relationship with it but i always feel so ??? reassured?? like it genuinely means the world esp for it being my very first fic to begin with

second, THANK YOU SO MUCH??!??!?!?!? OH MYGOD T____T i feel like a part of me was very conscious abt how i wrote sunwoo bc idk if i did him justice !!! or if his character really reflected him u know </3 so im very happy that it worked out in the end :]]] AND OFC MY JACOB... HE IS SO SENIOR CODED URGHHHHHHH SO I CANT BLAME U!!!

and thank u for noticing that :')) when it comes to reading books, i've always found myself avoiding mainly romance books (mainly bc i get bored </3), and ive always appreciated books that hold so much more than just romance, you know? and i feel like thats the type of principle i want to follow :]] not saying that theres anything wrong with mainly romance books (bc i finally find myself consuming that), but just more of a personal goal :] something i want to keep doing for my longer fics really

AND BAR DONT WORRY.... IT'S LITERALLY THE NEXT THING I WANT TO WRITE IVE BEEN TRYING TO THINK OF A PLOT JUST SO THAT IT DOES UR REQ JUSTICE!!!

and thank u for loving my jichang fic :') it's a very personal fic to me. i super get it that the trope is sooo overused and may make ppl hesitant to read it, but i like to think that the major theme of friendship is what made it different in the end </3

bar i love you so much T___T thank you for this </3 i still need to read ur eric fic i am very excited to read it this weekend hopefully </3 i love you always

[s0fter-sin]

has anyone read the demon trappers series? i read it when i was a kid and remembered the love interest of the 17 yr old mc was older and had worked with her dad and called her girl instead of her name and i was trying to remember how old he was. i googled it. he’s 23. why the hell was this guy written like a wholeass 40 yr old man??

[bthump]

Do you think guts genuinely loved griffith? Im saying this bc i feel like guts was just as fooled with the “image” griffith presented just as anyone else in the band. Its true griffith let him in on a side of him he wouldnt show anyone else but that still didnt really much affect the way guts idolized him and saw him as this great unreachable being (even going as far as dodging griffith’s attempts at opening up lol) i know that stems from guts’ own issues and insecurities but it still bugs me tbh. I love these two so much but theres always this voice in the back of my head bringing this up lol so i had to see what you think of it.

The way I see it, Guts' issues, and the way he put Griffith on a pedestal, didn't really start to get in the way of their relationship until Promrose Hall.

Before that there are a few instances of Guts treating Griffith like a leader, asking if it's an order when Griffith makes him rear guard in chapter 15, and "just order me to do it" with Julius' assassination, but those are pretty mild, and more like foreshadowing for when Guts' issues raise their head properly after Promrose Hall, rather than an actual problem. It’s part of how Miura shows why Guts is so easily swayed by the Promrose Hall speech.

Like Guts definitely admires Griffith a whole lot, but I don't think he sees him as a perfect godlike unreachable person until Promrose. He genuinely sees Griffith as his friend, presumably moreso than any of the other Hawks throughout those three years based on how Griffith treats him and how other characters comment on their closeness, which is one big reason the Promrose Speech and Griffith's little "I don't have any friends" line fucks him up so bad imo.

And this actually made me re-read chapter 16 and write a little thing on that wrt Guts’ early impression of Griffith, so here’s a pseudo part 2 to this answer lol.

So basically yes, I think Guts definitely genuinely loved Griffith, and had the potential to have an even deeper and more real connection with him that unfortunately Promrose Hall cut off at the quick. Thanks for the ask, hopefully this was a decent answer!

[bronanlynch]

fluff, slow burn, if they lived, secret agent

fluff five things you’re digging right now? 1) I’m gonna hopefully be running a game of scum & villainy for the sff soc rpg oneshot event this saturday and it’s basically be gay do crimes in space: the game

2) I gotta officially pick a dissertation topic soon which means I am back on my bullshit of yelling abt lesbian vikings and I’m like. remembering why I wanted to do this as my thesis bc it’s a good topic actually

3) every arc of ftlcast is extremely good but the most recent one was abt lady demon hunters and was very very good and fun to listen to

4) I just finished an essay on bog bodies which means I now have a spreadsheet of the most important bog bodies and a bunch of info abt them including which ones where staked down and therefore probably vampires (I mostly joking abt the vampire thing but not abt how glad I am that I have this spreadsheet now bc a thing that archaeology as a field could really use is more searchable databases w a bunch of compiled data instead of just. a bunch of individual case studies that u somehow gotta hunt down w like. dark magic or some shit)

5) I’ve been watching the good place and it’s really good actually I am in general not a comedy person bc I don’t. trust most comedy to not be Bad abt Things but it’s genuinely funny and says some cool nuanced things abt like. ethics and redemption arcs and the kind of positive “if there’s no inherent purpose to life why not just try to help each other bc we can” nihilism that appeals to me specifically

slow burn best fictional slow burn couple and what makes it great? the only reason I didn’t talk abt this for the last question is bc I wanna yell abt it here but I’ve been reading mo dao zu shi which is a book abt necromancy in ancient china which is very cool and good but more importantly it took 100 chapters and like 17 years of incredibly fraught mutual pining for the main couple to tell each other that they are in fact really very much in love w each other……. they’re so In Love that everyone has been assuming they’re already together for a long time (including 13 of those years while one of them was literally dead) (it’s ok he gets better he gets like. resurrected in the first chapter it’s a whole Thing) but neither of them believed that the other one actually liked them and Oh Boy I Die…….

(I looked on the wiki to try to find a timeline to figure out exactly how many Years they’ve been pining and it refers to them as husbands which is. technically spoilers bc the translation hasn’t gotten to the end yet but. god. wow I love them)

if they lived  meanest thing an author has ever done to you personally, and how do you plan to exact revenge? I am going to be angry every day of my life that there are some cool+interesting characters in g*me of thr*nes whomst I am still incredibly emotionally invested in despite having extremely strong negative feelings abt so much of the series and my revenge is going to be writing something that’s like. the pieces that I like except actually good and by good I mean. without the sexism/etc. and the whole. grimdark edgy “everything is awful” thing. I am going to personally give sansa stark the happiness she deserves and also a gf

spy/secret agent au what kind of spy would you be? not a very good one probably, I can’t even convince people to let me into places where I’m literally supposed to be, how am I supposed to get them to let me in where I’m not supposed to be

I’d be like. the consultant they bring in to tell them abt some archaeology thing that’s relevant to the mission for some reason. or some sort of filing room intern who accidentally discovers some Important Secret and probably gets killed off before I can tell the main characters

[cow3survivor]

Ep. 12: “Go Back On Mute” - Jennet

JENNET

trying to strategize and my mind is blanking... missing ethan hours :pensivestrawberry:

JONES

https://youtu.be/NrJhg-j-6WI

JESSICA

Here is what happened last round, another essay by Jessica. So everyone started targeting Lindsay again. This was not ideal for me because I'd like to keep Lindsay in the game as long as possible -- right now she is in my final 3 but she also is extremely unlikely to vote against me or really do anything against me. When I came online, everyone was acting as if this had just already been decided which was super annoying. Mikey said "I've heavily heard Lindsay" and it's like.... from who?? From our alliance of three other people?? That isn't heavily, that's everyone else making a decision and just saying I have to go along with it. The annoying thing was I couldn't really push too strongly for Lindsay to stay without that looking suspicious, plus apparently she doesn't really talk to a lot of people so like... I can only do so much. Then I spoke with Jake an hour before the vote and he suggested voting Sam. I said that I found that to be a waste of a move because Sam doesn't have a lot of close allies so we could always just vote him later. Also personally I wanted Sam to stay because I don't think he'd ever vote me out but I didn't say that. Obviously I preferred Sam leaving over Lindsay though, so I mean I'll take what I can get. Then as Jake and I were on call, he gets added to a chat with Jennet, Sammy, and Mikey. I find this very suspicious because ummm I'm supposed to be aligned with three of those four people and it's a very Choice Decision to leave me out of that. I extra do not love that move because I feel like Sammy and Mikey were basically willing to ruin their relationships with me to keep Jennet in the game; they played it off like "oh well I just like Jennet more than Lindsay, we aren't aligned" but I'm not buying it. I don't think Jennet made that chat entirely on her own without any prompting -- I'm pretty sure Sammy and/or Mikey told her not to put me in it which is giving me a huge pause. I told Jake that what we should do is make sure Shane/Lindsay/Sam were voting Jennet, figure out who Jennet/Sammy/Mikey (and mysteriously Jones, who Sammy just magically happened to get to vote his way? Okay...) were voting and then we could just pick who left. I said that personally I didn't want to keep Jennet over Sam because that chat was making me feel like there was a three or four person alliance we weren't in and that if we took out Jennet, we'd be breaking that up. Then I had to talk with Shane and Lindsay which was ummm interesting to say the least. I like working with them but they just??? Will do and say things that make no sense. Like Shane said if we couldn't get the votes on Jennet, we needed to vote for Jake. Ummmmm I am not voting for Jake, Jake tells me things and might be my only lifeline in this game. Anyways, I told them please do not do that let's vote Jennet. Then during the vote, I messaged Jake and I said hey what do you want to do, Sam or Jennet? He told me Sam buuut I said that I was still doing Jennet because I was worried about that alliance being a thing. He told me he'd do that too but then ended up switching back to Sam which is not a big deal, I don't think there's a big conspiracy there I think he genuinely changed his mind during the vote. Even if I knew he was voting Sam, I probably would not have done it? Just because I wasn't supposed to know what was going on.... although I haven't officially said that to Mikey and Sammy. After the vote I nicely :) confronted both of them (which quick note --- how can y'all not only lie to an alliance member but?? not even approach them after the vote????? jury management found dead). They originally tried to tell me it was very last second / imply it was made through a game of telephone and not an organized chat but I was like uhhhh nice try I know that isn't the case. This round if we could get Sammy out.... that would be really truly amazing. I do not want that vote block he has going into the final 7 and even though he says he trusts me, I feel like we just don't connect strategically in a way where I feel like I can actually trust him with information. It's weird everyone thinks Jake is playing the middle because I honestly think Sammy is. A f7 without Sammy is great because I feel like everyone would be very fractured, like when Daisy left, and then they'll all need me to move forward so I'll (hopefully!) be safe. But in order to vote out Sammy, I need Jake (and possibly Jones? or Mikey?) to be on board. For now I'm working on Jake and if I can get him on board, I might let him take the leap to tell Mikey and then I will approach him afterwards. I'm hoping Jake could also pull in Jennet or Jones to make that happen but it's hard to say. I know Jones and Sammy are friends outside of this so I'm very hesitant to try and break that up and Jennet I really cannot read. She's dug her heels in when I've tried to talk strategy with her before and I also get the sense she's too focused on what has happened in the past instead of what could be happening right now. But if Jake tells her the plan, maybe I could get Sammy/Jennet/Mikey/Jones against Jake/Shane/Lindsay, I pull Mikey over and/or Sammy wastes his vote cancel? Who knows.... hopefully people come online soon!

SAMMY

Tbh...I am feeling a bit annoyed in this round with my allies. I am one of the few original Brookesia left so obviously I am feeling a bit nervous that there could be connections too strong for me to surpass. The alliance I am in (called) wants to go after Jess. While I didn't want to contest this idea, I felt as if Jess wasn't going after me so this isn't really great for my game? I want Jess in this game more than I want others so like I tried pushing the Lindsay agenda a bit more just cause I would rather OG Brookesia people not keep going as it looks like that's the trajectory of the game right now. I need to find a way to split up Jake/Jones/Jennet as well and it seems like the best bet is to go after Jake. I know Jones already expressed her feelings about getting rid of Jennet in the future anyways so I know that connection isn't as strong as her and Jakes. I know Jess/Shane/Lindsay all think alike. Mikey wants to do whatever the alliance wants to do. I considered using my vote block power this round but I just don't know if it's worth giving up right now if that makes sense? Like I could flip to Jess/Shane/Lindsay and use a vote block and then vote out like Jake? I love Jake but I just can't be a part of an alliance knowing there are three people who have a tighter connection with each other than they do with me. I need to flip but I don't know if this is the round to do it in. ugg decisions. I love Jess so much and I want to tell her that her name is going around but I don't want it to fall back on me that I leaked so I really just want to observe as much as possible and make my decision right before the deadline teehee.

JENNET

after tribal i spent like 30 minutes being gaslight by shane and then letting jessica guilt trip herself, a good week

(a little later)

shane won immunity and i bet hes jumping for joy since i told him hes my #1 target but the gag of it all is i want miss jessica out bc shes won a few challenges and shes very complacent/ doesnt make her own moves and just does what others say

(after making a gameplan)

after tribal i spent like 30 minutes being gaslight by shane and then letting jessica guilt trip herself, a good week

JESSICA

I think we may have the votes to get Sammy out.... hopefully Jake is being honest and will at least tie it because I think if he does, we've got this! If he isn't and I am voted out, I just have to say yikes @ Sammy @ Jennet @ Jones ignoring me all day before voting for me? Once again, jury management found dead. Hopefully I survive!

MIKEY

there really isnt any. these ppl are predictable and boring. I wouldnt mind leaving so i  didnt have to pretend to care about their boring lives. im kidding but im not tbh. anyways im voting lindsay shes very fun but i want her out

JAKE

Okay so no video this week I’m with ~*family*~ but in short I’m continuing my flip-flopping and I’m trying to gun for Sammy this round... he’s just so dangerous and clearly the Touchy Subjects questions are telling of how “safe” he is and the kind of chances he has to win the whole game. So right now we’ve got four votes for Sammy if Shane Lindsay and Jess are being truthful, and if the “five” is being truthful then they should be voting for Lindsay (or Jessica because apparently no one here can make up their minds lmaoooo). I’m hoping that Jennet doesn’t want to go to rocks and she flips to vote Sammy but I’m going to stick with this group, I think keeping Sammy any longer is really risky (especially with his supposed relationship with Jones and Daisy and the potential that he has a block vote advantage??  Just found out about that today eek). So in short I’m hoping Sammy goes this week and hopefully I don’t totally burn the bridge with Mikey and Jennet and Jones? We’ll see hehe 🤪 xoxo gossip girl

SHANE

https://drive.google.com/drive/folders/1UpF46NGRB-92jGSyhbOeRSAPgqImwT43

LINDSAY

https://drive.google.com/file/d/1901p_EYd1N_iKGJKG6YeMTbedcGPcYNW/view?usp=drivesdk

[jynandor]

tlj spoilers under cut

WARNING: IF YOU’RE ON MOBILE AND YOU HAVENT SEEN THE MOVIE PLEASE DON’T SCROLL DOWN MY BLOG BECAUSE "READ MORE" DOESNT WORK!!!

-----------

this is very messy okay? i just came back

i don’t even know where to begin honestly. i think overall it was a good movie, but i personally failed to connect with some storylines and some characters’ actions. btw, this has absolutely nothing to do with rey’s parentage; i left that whole discourse a long time ago so i stopped caring. 

so to put some highlights first

- LEIA ORGANA USING THE FORCE. LEIA ORGANA DOING ANYTHING, WHAT A LEGEND

- MY LORD AND SAVIOR GARETH EDWARDS that little cameo made me smile 

- final scene between luke and kylo even though i knew luke wasnt actually present, it was aesthetically pleasing

- binary sunset :(

- LUKE AND LEIA REUNITING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 

- connix <3

- i liked crait wolves and those creatures from canto bight (man, i cant remember what they are called…um… damn), caretakers were very cute

things that made go what the hell am i watching

- luke milking that space cow, why (even though i laughed)

- porgs in general, they were cute but slightly annoying

- some of the humor was a bit dull but then again i liked few scenes

aaaaaaand things that got me completely underwhelmed (sadly, plenty of things)

- paige tico dying after like 5 minutes, a big disappointment but i knew this would happen. maybe storywise it made sense because it was something that drove rose’s story later on. still i wish she didnt die so quickly (but she was also a hero ♥)

- i expected a lot more from kylo’s turn :/ so the whole thing didn’t work for me. that being said...

- luke deciding to kill ben was OOC for him (i hope someone asks mark about this soon because i am 99,99% sure he agrees)

- kylo’s shirtless scene was unnecessary

- rey and kylo’s connection, so many of their scenes genuinely made me cringe. i also felt like rey’s own development got slightly sidelined and the movie focused more on her relationship with kylo.

- snoke’s death and  everything about him. i just went …..THAT’S IT? okay… 

- i said i didnt care about rey’s parentage and, while that’s true, i dont see how addressing who her parents were “payed off emotionally” but okay rian, you do you. im saying this bc most fans (me too, at some point last year but not anymore) had a lot of expectations set from TFA, interviews etc…. you know what i mean by this. let me clear it up right away: her parents being some random dead people doesnt make me love rey less, she’s amazing no matter who she is. i just wish things were handled way differently before this movie. i didnt see the point in so much mystery rather than having your audience guess and speculate for two whole years. also the way kylo spoke to her in that scene was a clear example of emotional abuse (”your parents are dead, they never cared, you have nothing and no one left but me”)

- DJ’s “turn” again finn and rose was predictable. his character wasn’t even necessary for the plot

- i wasn’t a big fan of how poe’s character was handled

- finn/rose forced romance

- phasma, oh my god… do i need to say this? DO I NEED TO SAY THIS?  gwen baby i am so sorry :/ she deserved a lot better

- hux took too much screentime again, why is he still around? who the fuck cares?  

and…. finally (doesnt fit in any “category”)

- luke’s death.  BECAUSE sadly i was indirectly spoiled about it earlier.... but even if i wasnt, it wouldn’t have surprised me :(

…

so uh, 7/10 from me… or 7.5/10? 

EDIT: 3/10 it’s what she deserves. 

i will probably watch another time, hopefully i will change my mind about some stuff. idk this “review” (again, incoherent MESS of a post) might seem a little harsh but i expected a lot more. yes, that’s it. nope didnt change my mind, it’s even worse.

EDIT 2: so a lot of people seem to think kylo must’ve lied to rey about her parents. which is plausible, it could be that he did. but you know what? even though i am not a fan of the way they resolved this in TLJ, i’d  be pretty annoyed if they went “HAH! GOTCHA! KYLO LIED” two years from now. it would be redundant and even worse than what we got. i dont even want to talk about this issue again, but this is how i feel right now.

[travellers-survivor-old-west]

Episode 4: “Just gotta try to wiggle myself in some where”- Austin

I kinda wish our tribe would lose just so I could see where the lines are tbh. Also I have a bad feeling that at a swap/merge our tribe is gonna be picked off because we’re going in with the most numbers and on a base level that’s dangerous; however, I do think it could be deeper than that because of the preconceived relationships and I’m looking forward to seeing who goes home tonight and where we go from here.

This round was a little wild for me. Austin has been my fave since the beginning and we finally created an alliance. We both liked eve so that was easy but we wanted one more person. This is where things got a little complicated. Him and eve both liked isaac but honestly i wasnt feeling isaac and love pat. But i didnt want to push too hard so we just went ahead with isaac. 

BUT we also talked to pat and will have ANOTHER alliance with him (so austin, pat and me). SO basically im working with everyone right now except keaton. Im glad our tribe has been killing it because that means no TC wooo 

We tribe swapped so that is fun. It's always interesting to have a switch up. I have still yet to be screwed by a tribe swap in my entire history of playing ORGs which is something I am happy with. This is one of the best iterations of a tribe I can think of actually. I can forge a closer bond with Xander and Dylan, because now if we lose I won't need to vote one of them out, they become my core 3. So, right after the swap I made an OG Malakoff chat with myself, Xander, and Dylan. I just wanted the immediacy to show that I was serious in wanting to stick to that, which I am. I have communicated several times that I want to work with Isaac, so ideally Austin will go in the event that we lose. I feel bad because he is a sweetheart, but he doesn't fit into my strategy, and if anyone understands game being game, he does.

I love my new tribe??? Not only is nick still here so that gives me a safety net, the sammy I like is here. Pat is here. No idea who eve is but that’s okay too. I’m loving this. Inb4 I get voted out next Bc they actually really fucking hate me :^). Byebye payton it was nice kinda knowing you? Hello ~hopefully~ friends <3

I forgot Austin has a date with Mary Jane daily so Im gonna have to cut him some slack.

Tribe swap....just what I didn't want to happen . I dont ha e my #1 ashley with me but at least I got issac here. Jared is on my tribe now too so that could go either way for me because he knows how I play the game. Gonna have to pull something out if my ass here .

This is for Alyssa you dumb ugly fat white bitch why you keep asking me for a confessional with trifling dirty white racist ass big fat bitch x Anyways. Made an alliance with Pat and Sammy! V excited to work with them but we’re snapping in immunity so, I don’t see why we would need to vote off Vi.... I mean someone at tribal! Hehe

Well....we got our last handed to us. I'm not happy going to tribal bc I feel I'll be the one going. I talk with jared and issac the most but I feel jared will stick with xander and dylan. Just gotta try to wiggle myself in some where.

I have been busy the past couple of days so this challenge being a endurance/speed comp was a struggle. And it looks like my team didn't do much. To help... It's fine we can get out one of these other two dead weights. Speaking of them. Im glad the swap merged me with two allies but the other two just suck to talk to... And that's coming from me .. Jess knows what I'm talking about. Anyways I don't want them here and want them gone. As for my allies. I like Jared a lot we are getting along and enjoying ourselves. He's definitely the one I trust most in this game and hopefully it gets me to merge where I can start phase 2 and hopefully get far. Dylan is fine .. he's offline a lot but he's from old tribe so like it helps. 

Just finished the challenge, OH MY GOD i suck at trivia but thankfully sammy snapped and we won, thank u sammy love u so much!!! Still dont believe he is straight tho x IM JOKING PLS DONT KILL MEDFHNSJFDH

I hate confessions. That’s my confession for the round... jkjk. Eh there isn’t much to talk about now that it’s tribal time. I hope whoever from our og tribe stays safe but I forgot who is there so oops. Sammy killed it. I still call bs on the centipede question but oh well. It wouldn’t have changed the result. It would have just made the gap close by 1. 

LOVE MY NEW TRIBE. So happy we swapped. I’m with actual love of my life ASHLEY!!! And Chloe is amazing too. Aidan popped off in the challenge. Keaton is Keaton. This is a good group and I’m glad they did rlly well in the challenge. I love this kind of thing but I wasn’t able to constantly be on my phone all weekend bc that’s rude :( so I’m glad it worked out. Hoping the tribe swap works out in our favor and Xander jared and Dylan stay together for the vote. Idk if Isaac and jared are friends??? I hope Isaac leaves because he knows I’m a ‘threat’ in games and because I think Ashley yelled at him once. Idk who Austin is but Ashley likes him. But idk how likely that is if Isaac and jared have a connection. As long as jared stays safe ifgaf who leaves.

Yowza. We got absolutely wrecked in the challlenge. I don't WANT to lose any challenges, but I believe in the long run I should be happy to take this L. As another way to show my loyalty, I decided to give my idol progress in the chat with Xander and Dylan. I noticed Dylan never reciprocated so that gives me 1 reason to be wary. Then, Dylan posted a very inappropriate joke in the tribe chat in reference to Survivor Thailand, and the word "rape" was used, so that was the 2nd thing to make me uneasy. At first, Dylan and Xander had no opinion on who to vote, so I voiced that I would like to vote Austin- then Dylan remembered who Isaac is and said "he can go." I eventually got things back on track to target Austin, but Dylan better be careful- it's 3 strikes and you're out with me. I have a good relationship with Isaac so I wouldn't be surprised to see Dylan go if we lose again.

Day 9 on the survivor tribe. My thoughts are about toes and only toes. They are consuming my entire day. I exist merely to think of toes. 

Also Chloe...

Okay so I’m just gonna throw down some of my thoughts right now since I’ve been very quiet in confessionals. I fucking hate these small ass fucking tribes. It makes the thought of going to tribal terrifying because your odds of going home are increased. Since the swap ive actually really been enjoying my time, I really like my new tribe and I feel I can actually connect with these people better than on my first tribe. I am glad to actually have Aidan with me because he’s like THE person I want to work with from my og tribe, along with Vi. I still have my reservations on Nick even though I think he’s nice I can’t trust him as far as I could throw him. I really feel that the trivia challenge brought us closer together as a tribe since what’s a better bonding experience than yelling at Jess that she’s wrong 50 times in one day. I think we’re all collectively quite strong and I really hope that means we can slide past for a while without going to tribal. 

Honestly i always forget what i confess from last time but i still think I’m in a good position in the game. However I really do not want to go to tribal because I don’t want to show my cards. Eve and Pat both want me to work with them so we have an alliance and then Vi and Nick approached me and want to work with me as well. This was completely surprising to me bc I felt as if I would just be an easy vote out if we were to go to tribal since I’m a lone wolf. However I’m in the middle and I feel somewhat powerful knowing that people want to keep me and want to work with me. Me and nick have had a rocky relationship in past games but i think he’s a great person. He’s just a wildcard. I love vi and i think she’s the sweetest person to have ever existed but my gut is telling me to work with pat and Eve atleast for the first vote. Hopefully I don’t have to make the decision but who knows. That’s all I have for now other than I think the idol system isn’t anything I keep getting zapped. I feel like a fly in a southern home...ZAP.

I couldn’t remember the day so I put 69. I hate this tribe with my whole heart and my whole bussy. Jared is the only one giving me any sort of shot at making it passed this round. Austin is a slime ball who will do anything to save his own skin, Xander is dead apparently, and Dylan has been tracking down places where famous people died. I feel like this is my own personal hell and while I’ve been assured that Austin is going home (which I wouldn’t be surprised was a lie) I still have to make a swap or a merge and with the clowns on this tribe being inactive and never talking about anything but Star Wars or not talking at all I don’t know how possible it is to win a goddamn challenge. 

*insert Da'vonne pretends to be shoocked gif at a swap* Since it didn't happen at 16 I wasn't surprised too see it at 15 but I'm glad because three tribes provides for much more buffer. My initial reaction to my tribe was positive as I saw that I had Chloe and three new people in the mix. I'm not gonna lie that I was getting bored on my old tribe but I do hope that Nick is doing alright. He's one ally that I'd love to connect with again... Vi is alright too but I don't know how strong of a connection we fostered. First impressions of my new tribemates: Keaton - I heard he was fucking with my friend in another game so my guard was up but I tried and he seems aloof and random with his contributions but it makes sense since he's playing 4 games at once. Will probably work off of the others who contribute in challenges? We'll see. Ashley - Sweet and seems like a hard worker. Not too much of a read on her yet Owen - He seems nice and genuine but not much of a read from a game perspective yet. It seems the split is 2-2-1 on my tribe from previous tribes but I don't know how strict to tribal lines people are going to play but I can feel some aloofness with Keaton and Ashley is traveling so... that's that on that. If we were going to tribal I have no idea what the fuck would happen but I want to strengthen connections. Honestly I think we can make it to the merge without hitting an elimination but who knows. THANKFULLLLLLLY my ass had a lucky night on the railroads and jumped to spot number fifty and apparently found a STEAL A VOTE. This is what I DESERVE. Thank you Old West Gods for blessing me, the star, with this iconic power. I'm glad I have it in my back pocket and I'm not telling a fucking soul. If it needs to be used, it will be flaunted and I will pop shit. Hopefully I can save it for after merge but if I need to control a pre-merge vote just to get my way, I'm going to do it. 

https://soundcloud.com/user-327042896/dylan-ep-2

[briteboy]

yelling @ santi, i’m evil again (what else is new), SOME REALLY REALLY OLD ASKS, one GoT spoiler at the very bottom (beware)

*angrily slaps santi* GET YOUR SELF TOGETHER YAH POOP HEAD

Lou and Fiona deserve happiness pls let it happen ty

they do ;-; it will happen, don’t worry, no one suffers forever <3 i’ve actually been planning out lou’s story and i’m excited to actualize it hehe

I just read all of Santis story. Dear god, it is amazing. I cannot begin to describe how much I love it. I have been really sick lately and have such a hard time concentrating on anything for more than one second but I have not been able to look away from this story, not even when I re-read it for the third time. You are an amazing writer and I have fallen in love with every charachter you have introduced. I teared up so many times and my heart began beating fast, it was really an experience.

OH MY GOD ;___________; YOU READ IT THREE TIMES WHAATDOSOIGODFSKL holy shit thank you so much, i don’t even know what to say right now lmao ;-; i’m just kinda in awe that i was able to grab your attention like that and that you enjoyed it so much and just askjdjfsd THANK YOU i can’t say anything else but just thank you, people like you make this all worth it <3 

A case of the novembers is the kinda story you read and you just know its going to stick with you for awhile. Like ones day, you'll be long gone in the future, doing something totally different, older wiser, all that bullshit, and you'll just randomly remember what a bittersweet story it was.

OMFG ;___; holy heck asjdjnfkdkjs this really got me right in the heart lmao. that’s the kind of story it’s always been for me and seeing other people interpret it that way as well is just mind boggling, thank you <3 

You are evil. My poor heart hurts. ;______________;

you've ruined my life

Life hack: listen to the entire Hamilton soundtrack whilst working out at the gym. By the end of it, you'll have lost half your body weight due to sweating and crying at the same time (pls help this was such a bad decision)

OMG that’s me with grimes’ art angels lmao i go hord to kill v maim and venus fly

hamilton fans also go hord i respect it. learn more about history get swole killing two birds with one stone

Okay this is so fucking random but a while ago you did a post where you talked about perfect bby gianni saying that he spent a lot of time in introspection and like Thank you 'cause now I have a word to put on this thing I do when I try to figure why I feel certain things or what my relationship with people/random shit is and why and yeah I kind of understand myself a little better now so thx a lot!!! 😘😘😘 Also, you're great.

i think i was actually talking about santi (’cause that’s where we’re at right now, in that period of introspection for him heheh) but YES omg that makes me so happy ;-; it’s a good word lmao and i do the same thing, in fact i’m always trying to figure out my relationships with everything in order to understand myself more. that’s kinda why i’m so into astrology haha. i’m glad you finally got to pin down that feeling for yourself, it’s the best when that happens <3 YOU’RE GREAT TOO 💫

NOOOOOOOO MY FAVS THIS CAN'T... LOU.... SANTI PLS... THIS IS A RIOT 😭😭

let’s start protesting santi in the streets

Hi!! Umm I'm guessing you do but just in case, did you know there was a tear accessory? I think it's an eyeliner (cause you mentioned having to draw them yourself)

yeah i do! i mentioned the ones by s-club, i’ve used those a couple times. but i like drawing them myself because i feel like it’s weird to have the same single teardrop every time one of my characters cries (and we all know they’ve been crying a lot lately lmfao) if they didn’t cry often i probably wouldn’t feel compelled to draw the tears. but i don’t mind drawing them honestly, it’s kinda fun lmao. thanks for your consideration <3 

so im sitting here thinkin....... what if santi goes on this trip and coms back and lou is in a relationship!?!?!

👏santi👏get👏it👏together👏

HE’S TRYIN

i want to die

AAAH SOLE DEVELOPMENT BETWEEN CUTE DEVIL CHILD AND I ALMOST DIED TWICE TATOO MAN YES

I HAD TO READ THIS LIKE THREE TIMES TO UNDERSTAND IT LMFAOSDOJDKF BUT YES their relationship kills me the most ;__;

wait santi tried to kys :'(

WHERE U BEEN he did  :{

what font do u use in your histories?

arial!

hi u have a really pretty blog and I hope you have a good day

THIS IS SO SWEET I DON’T DESERVE IT ;-; I HOPE YOU HAVE A GOOD DAY TOO HONEYBEE 🌻

nyooooooom

I WENT M.I.A FOR A LITTLE AND I COME BACK TO READ UP ON THE STORY AND HOW DARE YOU ASHDDJFKL

@teishajenaie on instagram looks like Rooney to me, idk if you'd agree but ??

i see it!! definitely in the eyes and nose. also sorry i answered this literally like 3 months later lmao

gooey by glass animals gives me santi vibes :) ive been listening to it on repeat (bc im tht bitch) and it was making me think of you and his story! c: i hope you dont mind me over here lmao anyway, im excited to see where it goes and real excited for a back story for lou!! <3 lots of love

omg haha that’s actually funny because i used it in that one scene of him tripping, although it’s like completely a gianni song to me (at least personality-wise, it’s even on his playlist on my character page) and noooo i don’t mind, i love that song and i love when people recommend me songs!! i have a whole bunch of recommendations in my inbox that i need to acknowledge omg. anyway I’M EXCITED THAT YOU’RE EXCITED, especially for lou’s story, it’s coming up reeeeeal soon <333

i feel so late to the party but i Just started reading your story like five minutes ago and im absolutely entranced by it already and i cant wait to catch up and finally understand what to heck is going on

this was sent literally forever ago when santi and molly were out there being wild in the desert lmao so i hope you caught up and everything. “entranced” omg that’s such a wonderful word i’m honored

i didnt think i could love you more but the fact that you watch arrested development makes me so happy. i cry. my boyfriend has a mr manager, bluths frozen bananas shirt thats literally my favorite thing ever.

OMGGG YES i watched it once forever ago and i need to re-watch it asap lmao. I’M PRETTY SURE I BOUGHT THAT SAME EXACT SHIRT FOR MY BROTHER FOR CHRISTMAS ONE YEAR

Just a biiig prank. Huge

this one is from so long ago i don’t remember the context but i laughed at loud when i read it. huge

i was playing with uncharted for the first time today and they said Navarro in it and i was like THATS MY BOI SANTIII

santi infiltrating everyone’s lives my bf played uncharted tho!! it looked cool. like indiana jones. i liked the marketplace part. a monkey stole his apple

Hi sunny! I really am in love with your story (even if it's tearing me apart at the moment) and just wanted to say you're cool Stay strong ma dude

HI THANK YOU <333 you’re also cool my dude and i’m sorry for tearing you apart (if it makes you feel any better this story tears me apart on a daily basis)

what packs and expansions do u have for ur game?

ummmmmm all of them except vintage glamour and fitness stuff. i wish i didn’t buy some of the stuff packs lmao but what can ya do i actually didn’t even get vampires or bowling or parenthood until like a month ago lmao i’m late to the party

Oh shit she's been dead hasn't she. Like this is all a drug or alcohol infused bender of mollys memory, she's probably never left. They're probably still at the hospital. I hope I fucking wrong but shit I also hope not. Poor santi

we’re so far past this but i just wanted to publish this anyway lmao it was a good theory! and this person was so sure of it it kinda made me wish it was true lol. sorry if that disappointed you but i’ll always remember this one in my sad sad heart 💔

how long did it take for you to make friends here? I started a simblr because I really like storytelling with my sims & I thought it'd be fun to meet people who enjoy that, too, especially since I don't have many friends irl...but I've been here for quite a few months now and it seems like no one even cares that I'm here....everyone I try to interact with pretty much ignores me after a message or two....I'm just feeling really discouraged about my presence here :/

I’M REALLY SORRY I DIDN’T ANSWER THIS SOONER ASKJDKJFSDKA (i’m sure it didn’t help the fact that you feel ignored, i really really hope you see this) but okay uhhhhhhh i only had acquaintances from 2015 up until like this year? then i started really becoming close with people. so it took a while lol, but i think everyone starts off slow because it’s mostly about the actual game we’re playing at first and then making friends just happens through that. don’t get discouraged, like i said it took a while for me. you really just need to reach out to the people you’d like to become friends with, reply to their posts, give your genuine thoughts, say something that’ll make their day...people notice that no matter what they have going on, i promise. i hope you’re still here and hanging in there. don’t get caught up in who’s talking to you or not talking to you, just do your thing, enjoy what you do, and people will notice you. <3

3. Hi so I just wanted to say that I love your story, I'm here for every update. I'm an s3 player I play s4 every once in awhile but s3 has my soul. I love Santi and I know he will be happy in the end, whether it's with Lou or not(hopefully it is tho) I only want him to be happy. I go through so many emotions in one post, like this is a tv drama and I can’t wait for the next episode. This is the end of my cut and paste. Have a nice day.❤️

HI HELLO <3 this is so sweet and i can’t believe you actually care about my story lmao thank you i’m glad you have faith in his happy ending, i don’t want anyone to think i genuinely like making my characters suffer lmao. i only do it to make the happy ending more satisfying. asjdfjksd comparing my stuff to film or tv always makes me so giddy so THANK YOU ily <333

"Suicide before you see this tear fall down my eyes" (Beyonce) reminds me of Molly's situation soooo muchhhh aaaahhhhh

OMG YES what a good connection. good song good connection yaeeahhh better call molly with the good hair

Ummmm... hello! I just read through your whole story with Santi and I'm like... holy fuck. Not only is your story wonderful, your editing is so good. I'm surprised I didn't shove my eyes up against my computer screen. Please continue making wonderful things and being great. Signing off 12:31 in the morning, I hope you have as much fun as you want to

“as much fun as you want to” omfgasdkngjd why did that make me laugh so much. don’t have too much fun, have the responsible amount of fun anyway HELLO thank you soooooO much ;-; pls don’t shove ur eyes up against the screen i’m almost positive that’s not good for them. but i appreciate this so much thank YOU for being great <3 signing off at 2:18 in the morning after ignoring this message for months now (i’m sorryyyyyyy) but um ily

HELLO??? I JUST READ A SERIOUS CASE OF NOVEMBER FOR THE FIRST TIME AND I'M LIKE CRYING???? y u do dis to me I hate you and love you at the same time

(I need to rant I'm sorry) My uncle is really positive towards the army and war and stuff like that and all day he's been going on about how it should be mandatory to serve in the military, especially for "little brat girls" like me? And it's stressing me out so much I want to cry :( The army and war is something that genuinely scares me and I don't want anything to do with it, but he's just going on and on! What should I do?

this is literally sooooooooo late and i feel so bad i’m sorry, i hope this still helps you out and i hope you see it tho okay. i’m pretty sure this was even before the trans military ban like whew idek what your uncle must think about that. tbh just ignore him, like i know it’s hurtful but like...what is his point in telling you this? i would’ve literally been like (sarcastically) “ok then sign me up” but i’m also a lil shit so that’s probably not the best thing to say. but really like the only thing he’s trying to do is feel powerful by means of expressing his militaristic (no pun intended) opinions to someone far younger than him. it’s so that he feels bigger and better than you (especially by calling you a brat). he’s a sad man and anyone who relies on the military, of all things, to shape a person probably doesn’t have a strong sense of self anyway. i love you okay, just ignore him, don’t let him stress you out <3

I'm a little high and it's late but I have a lot of courage now so I've been following you for a while and I just want to tell you how much I love your story! I have come across other places on tumblr who do this but none have captured me as this one did! You are amazing and I am in love with this story! Thanks fo being you! :)

ONMG YOU HAD TO BE HIGH TO SEND THIS LMAO that was me this weekend anyway thank you so much, it floors me every time anyone says these kinds of things to me and it never gets old ;-; you are so amazing ok <333

you can't possibly be offended by a homophobic joke in game of thrones, it's set in medieval times. they had several lgbt characters in it, it's not the show that's homophobic, it's the characters, which is accurate for that time period.

o i can and i will lmao i mean i get where you’re coming from but with that logic you could say it’s only accurate to put homophobic jokes in today’s media just because people are still homophobic in the time live in. i know it’s the characters, but you do understand that someone writes those characters, right? it’s bad writing. it’s lazy and pandering and because of that it’s offensive. idk if you know the exact dialogue i was referring to but it was so completely unnecessary lmfao. they could’ve made a million other jokes. regardless of how it offended me it was just BAD lmao

SPOILER BELOW OK DON’T SAY I DIDN’T WARN YA

@ I wanna watch GoT anon: don't. It's just so fucking bad. The definition of overhyped tbh (and btw, sunny, PLS HELP HE SCREWED HIS FUCKING AUNT WTH)

LMAO SOMEONE ACTUALLY AGREES WITH ME? wow bless u. it is definitely overhyped, like it was good at first but it’s been riding that hype through these past couple of seasons to disguise the bad writing. i understand being entertained by it, but i’m always surprised when people think it’s actually well written at this point...it’s so cringey and now thanks to the season finale this fanbase will be justifying incest. great!

OK MOVE ALONG NOW

[ts-seychelles]

EP. 4 - “SURVIVOR GODS I’M BEGGING FOR YOUR MERCY” - VILMA

whoever complained about free rice, ya moms a ho

Tbh I hate this. Vilma is a sweetheart and i love her. But like, we need the numbers in the long run. And apparently Jared will not hesitate to lie to people, as I was told by Ash and will just try to make you feel safe. So it would be easy if Nicole was here and if we lose again, I think it would be best to get rid of her because then Jared has no one but us. but at the same time, I know Nicole is smart enough to know that Ruben, Alex and Johnny are HUGE threats in this game and they are a force to be reckoned with.

So yeah nothing is happening because we keep winning hehe. I love that for us. I’m hoping they kill Vilma this round, just so another Malabar doesn’t go home. But honestly Vilma is iconic and deserves better so idfk tbh. I feel like my closest ally rn is Johnny. I think he’s so annoying but in like a kid brother kind of way. I just want to like smack him sometimes. But he’s cool. He means well. We’ve gone to the end in another game together so he knows I can beat him, but I think for the time being he’s good to work with. Also, Zach can choke. I want to keep him for the excel skills, but KILL HIM FOR FUCKING CALLING THE CHAT 80 TIMES LAST NIGHT

Rip me. My tribe lost immunity and I'm about to get voted out even though I've been one of the biggest, if not the biggest, challenge contributor of my tribe. The other tribe sent Nicole to ghost island which wasn't a surprise to me since I'm not close with any of them, plus her boyfriend is literally on that tribe so yay. They sent me to death! I've been begging people for my life and basically offering to be their bitch, and they've said they'd consider keeping me but honestly it doesn't look good. Tribal is only two hours away and it is starting to look like I'm going home. People have quit responding to me. Wish I had that idol right now. I'm gonna copy my ramblings here: 22.37 UGHHH this is so hard Everyone has said they'd consider saving me but they're probably just saying it to make me feel better Ash seems the most genuine though But no one has told me any other name so if nothing changes during the next few hours I'm out 22.55 I'm trying to be their bitch all they have to do is believe me LOL I would honestly be down working with these guys on the long term since I think my og tribe was way more active and I was practically on the outs there too, why would I want to work with someone I can't beat at the end But I'm not sure they believe me Even though the fact they sent Nicole to Ghost Island really proves she's way better connected to the other side than I am But I definitely understand the appeal of staying united since nobody from og Lazare has been voted out yet Too bad they'd be sending home their weakest link if they decide to vote me out so it doesn't really matter 23.38 Everyone stopped answering me :'( 0.46 SURVIVOR GODS I'M BEGGING FOR YOUR MERCY It has been a fun game just wish I was able to stay in it longer. </3 It's partially my fault though, I kinda failed to connect with people and haven't started many conversations. Socializing is hard. Ugh.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OryTpBiwm14

Okay so I'm fully expecting an OTTN if we do get an edgic, because I'm playing a little slimy. This immunity would have been pretty easy to get a solid 30 at least on but, I settled for ten because....we gotta get rid of this tribes dead weight. I love Augusto to pieces, Regan is good with me and Vilma is a doll. But, Sam and Ash don't deserve to place higher than anyone else left in this game. On top of that, there were two distinct scenarios I could see happening, which I talked about in my chat so I'll just copy/ paste that here: Long story short I feel like Sam isn’t doing anything and Ash isn’t doing anything so there’s at least two people lower than me on my tribe, where as in the Takamaka tribe Dan might die if they lose, and Jared might die in Malabar if they lose. Based on old tribe lines maybe I’m wrong but either way, if Malabar wins there’s an OK chance I’ll be sent to ghost island. If Takamaka wins there’s a big chance someone would vote against me will be sent to ghost island. I can’t afford either people who I feel are kind of ride or die obviously bc of personal reasons to get voted out Especially when there’s a good chance people will find them threats higher than me at merge Bc big scary challenge beast men Based on old scores they’ve been sending the shittiest performer to ghost island or the person who they think will be most likely voted out so, if I paint this picture like I did poorly that might even favor me I really thought 10 was throwing the comp and doing a bad job but it turns out, Regan doesn't know how to read so she...really did that. On top of that, I DID get sent to Ghost Island! So that was a fun twist because I think tribal can go three ways. Sam goes because she never does the challenges on time Ash goes because she always leaves the challenge until last minute Vilma goes because she's not original Malabar. If I would have stayed and they wanted to vote Vilma, I would have had to vote her out thus tipping off Alex that I'm not down with his whole Pagong idea of the Malabar's at merge. But, alas! I don't have to get any blood on my hands at this tribal. Instead....I got a fun little surprise at Ghost Island! But more on that later :) Toodles.

2.41 Ugh it's me :'( Regan and Augusto are apparently pushing for me Ash seems to be the only one who'd seriously consider keeping me THIS IS NOT FAIRRRRR Nicole has apparently told Augusto how Alex was controlling the og Lazare I don't necessarily agree with that Like, he did tell his opinions on things and I could see why it could be off-putting But I wouldn't go as far as to say he was controlling the tribe I tried to tell Augusto that it wasn't true to make him question Nicole's honesty but idk if it worked But what would I actually know since I was an outsider there too This is so sad Vilma, 17th place YAY From 7th to 17th Also it's definitely too early to pull shenanigans and lie I have an idol After they'd found out I lied they'd hate me RIP RIP RIP I think I've used all my cards 3.14 I really wish all the pre game relationships wouldn't affect the game so much People just want to play with their friends! Which totally makes sense Would be funny to take Samantha and Ash to vote one of Regan/Augusto out But I don't think that could happen 3.38 Yep I'm done for Tried to inform Ash about Nicole's relationship with Regan & Augusto and they're definitely concerned but not concerned enough to flip for me haha I think I've done all I coulddd Shit

YEET we won I didnt wanna have to vote out Jared

With work being hell I am just glad to once again be safe and not have to worry hopefully I can catch a break and show my worth in this game, I am a player, I am a fighter

[blackrupee]

Wow your life sounds complicated right now I'm sorry for that. So you aren't gonna have any managers what the fuck? And OH MY GOD I hate when people come in to eat so close to close!!!! ( I work @ zaxbys) if someone is acting passive aggressive I would act even more passive aggressive- make that bitch regret it- regarding the 2 guys: 2 guys is better than no guys:))) wish the first one didn't pressure you though. How did the 2nd one hurt you? - and I care so don't worry about boring me

hi hello would you like to read a novel on my life thanks i talk too much (tldrs at end)

nah like.. we had been managing with a general manager and 3 assistant managers even though we really need 4 so as not to overwork anyone. we recently hired a new one from a corporate arbys (we’re franchised) and two just quit. like i mentioned, theyre not coming back even though the original plan was that their new jobs would be only temporary (6 weeks). sooooo now we have a general manager who only works weekday day shifts, one assistant manager who is relatively new (she had been working at this place for a while but was promoted to manager 6ish months ago) and another who is brand new but still has some experience. they said theyre looking to promote from within initially, but they might have to hire outside people if no suitable potential manager is picked. id love to get manager pay and its not like managers do anything hard so id be WILLING to be a manager..like the whole reason why i got trained on backline was because we have such a big turnover rate with backline people since it fucking SUCKS and i was wanting to be helpful and flexible. so like. thats what i offerred. but one assistant manager was like “lmao all youd do is swear at the customers” and im like bitch when have i ever?? i talk shit about them all the time but ive only sworn IN FRONT OF a customer twice and neither time was it directed at them. but i mean im sitting on a small handful of customer complaints so its not like the gm would even consider me probably. idk dude. i can be nice if you pay me to be nice. but i get paid to do food and do it fast……….so

but yeah literallyyyyyyyyy i have no idea how people can be so??? inconsiderate???? and they dont??? care??? im learning that my contant frustration with people in my personal interactions is due to a disconnect between what i value in  expectations and what actually happens. like. when i go somewhere i already KNOW what i want, so i say it quickly and competently. i preface a lot of my interactions with people im requesting food or services from with “i’m sorry but…”. i phrase things as “could i get” as opposed to “get me” or “i want” which sound HELLA rude tbh. id always have my money ready at the window or the register, im always trying to pay attention and not miss anything or just….be rude in any way bc i know fast food fucking sucks. i know some of the people i interact with probably hate their job as much as i do and i want to be the smallest burden i can be. and it seems like nearly no one else has these same values???? and i dont understand how people can just??? be? so? inconsiderate?

also yes bitch im the queen of passive aggression. literally the night before i was working a short shift and my friend was closing frontline and this bitch was closing drivethrough. i just got the okay to clock out and i was like “bye! have a beautiful night! just know that i love you so much and ive everything ive ever said has always been fake until this point! never meant anything ive ever said until now especially if your name starts with k or ends with ristin (drivethrough girl/the one whos being so difficult is named kristin) but just know that i love you!” and basically being really dramatic and extra as satire.

i guess for context the whole reason she decided to be mad at me was the other night when she was drunk and was like “do you even likeeeeeee meeee i feel like you hateeeee meeee wahh wahh wahhhh” even though im like…..yes bitch i enjoy your company? i joke/use hyperbole/satire/irony/whatever a lot but like occasionally id be like “ey yo you know its all jokes right u know i love u right” just to ensure that she knows but she fucking. ignores it all. i feel like she so desperately WANTS me to hate her and tbh i got fucking sick and tired of hearing her complain all the time about this shit! i fucking hate repeating myself! so sure. if you want me to hate you so fucking much there. i hate you. i fucking hate you so fucking much. like is that what you want to hear? is that validating? are you fucking happy?

its so fucking frustrating

but i will not be held accountable for her decision to be upset. because thats what it is. she wants to be upset, and she wants me to be responsible for it when its literally not my responsibility. i am absolutely not going to stand for this shit like i kind of want to say its emotional abuse lmaooo but im just so fucking sick of it. 

everyone knows that i take chicken tenders and turnovers that would be thrown out at the end of the night and she was closing frontline yesterday and made a point to throw out the turnovers right next to me without asking if i wanted any/leaving any for me. i mean i completely expected her to be that petty of a bitch so it was kind of funny tbhonestly. also im p sure she unfollowed me here lmaoo

with regards to the guys and this paragraph could get a bit tmi/nsfw: yeah the first one kind of sucked but i feel like a little bit of the New Person Nerves have worn down so id do better if we were to hookup again. because like i totally would love to have fucked him but…..anxiety. he was hot tho. like 10/10 body and ass holy shit. plus he complimented me on my ass eating so (assuming that was genuine and not a vapid ego boost haha paranoia am i right) hopefully he comes back for seconds. 

second guy ive had a longish history with. started talking to him at the beginning of last fall semester and we hooked up kinda regularly for about a month. things fell apart, we both understood that we wouldn’t be good dating wise but still enjoyed meaningless cuddles. whatever. it got to a point where he would only hit me up like once every month and a half or so and towards like january-ish he hits me up again. so im like nice cool lets chill. im getting ready for this but my phone is in the other room. while im doing this he drove by my place to pick me up (since he was on his way back from nashville), didnt get a response to an “im here” text (bc i was busy and tbh not expecting him to do that), and left. he lives within like walking distance tho so im like “?? sorry i was busy are you still out or should i walk over?“ and he texts me like “sorry hold up a thing just happened” and im like…….okay. so im just.. waiting around for him. periodically texting like “hey are we good for tonight and whats going on?” because like there was some drama with his friend? hes like.. apologizing and shit but this goes on for an hour. BUT. the ENTIRE time he’s dealing with this friend problem or whatever he’s literally on grindr. and at the end of this hour im like in full blown paranoia panic mode and i literally text him something mentioning this and he BLOCKS ME ON GRINDR so im like ??????!!!!??? and i text him (all while saying “not to be crazy or paranoid bc im probably coming off that way but like could i get an answer or something??”) AND HE LITERALLY SAYS HE DELETED HIS GRINDR. but thats a LIE because i have a secondary account to see like……if guys are still on grindr/if a thing with a guy might turn into something more like if i see he’s not on grindr as much?? thats prob incredibly stalkerish and probably really creepy but hey. thats me. so i KNOW he lied to me but i cant really say “hey ur a liar” without disclosing this weird creepy stalker part of me (funnily enough this isnt the first time a guy has lied to me and i caught it with my secondary account! so it proves to have some function use in the end. not totally crazy). so. yeah. that was the incident. after this i dont trust him at all, and i still dont, but i had it in my mind to like somehow get him to fall in love with me just so i could break his heart for doing this? never really worked out. so now im at the point where im like….eh he’s a piece of shit and i hate him but ill cuddle with him bc it feels good

back to nsfw/tmi: the sex was okay. he’s weird about people being near his like….dick and stuff because he was raped and i totally get it bc i was too but he was comfortable enough for me to finger him and my finger still hurts from where he clenched when he came lmaoooooo. was totally hot tho. and i got to east his ass so im like eyyyyyyyy. its been so long since ive eaten ass so having it two consecutive nights in a row has been cathartic.

tldr; we have 2 assisant managers and a gm rn. looking for more

tldr; bitch. same.

tldr; bitch. same.

tldr; he’s a liar

[intothespideyverses]

what I imagine going down next season (as a result of everything that happened in sesson 3) warning for discussion of suicide/self-harm:

SHINY

-ok since the whole sex subplot was never really resolved (they SAID they talked but we didnt see shit so) I think this would be a good time to introduce ace!Shay. Now another part of me would also like for shiny to have sex just so esme could stop fucking with m'daughter's head but shay seemed way too opposed to the idea of sex in general (and not in a nervous way, but in a "why would I ever have sex?" kinda way). And maybe once Shay's comfortable with being ace she can just deck esme right in the nose idc idc idc she had it coming! Fuck a $230 skirt bih! Tiny would be weirded out and probably disappointed at first but bc he’s literally the perfect bf he'd come around eventually. Hopefully they could highlight that there are ways to be intimate in a relationship w/o having sex. I just want shiny happiness and for people (lola up until she apologized, esme) to stop going out of their way to make shay feel so insecure and then getting mad at her when she reacts to their bs.

-speaking of which as much as I hate to see her miserable I think shay needs an angsty storyline. She solves her problems so quickly and efficiently, we never even see the emotions she must be going through. i don’t think her being ace would cause her too much stress, she'd do her research for a bit, have a fight with tiny about it (maybe even suggest to keep the relationship open, which would offend tiny) but other than that the real source of angst would come from esme. lets say esme finds out, y’all already know she would never let shay hear the end of it. that, on top of esme being EVERYWHERE and the two of them competing to be both the smartest and most athletic girl in school, would probably really get to shay's psyche. maybe esme goes too far one day, and shay just says fuck it and throws hands?? or maybe she breaks her phone?? idk something rly impulsive bc shay doesn't normally make impulsive decisions. of course esme makes shay out to be the irrational one and shay tries to quit the track team, her grades start slipping, etc etc. esme gets bored without having someone to compete against, or maybe she notices the change in shay's demeanor (and bc of maya’s suicide attempt and her mom) is afraid she pushed shay over the edge. they talk after class one day, esme still being bitchy but by the end a little teary eyed. I think their talk would be reminiscent of anya and holly j in season 8?? 9?? where anya was all like "why are you so mean to me" and hj's like "bc u let me bitch :)" so esme CLEARLY isn't gonna take any real responsibility for bullying shay but shay decides that shes NOT gonna be the bigger person for once. Idk how this would end but I definitely want shay to be more confident by the end, and for esme to learn when to stand down.

-Tiny's line about shay just seeing him as a "good nerd boy" rly stuck out to me. How much does shay know about tiny's past?? This definitely has to be brought up at some point, and I really thought the show would've mentioned that but w/e. Shay probably knows SOMETHING about the gang stuff but not how far it goes, or his family, etc. Tiny has an image that he keeps from everyone else but saves only for shay, which is adorable (they have boggle ((is that like scrabble???)) dates...need me a freak like that) but at some point shays gonna have to see the rest of him. Tiny is tired of shay assuming so much about his intentions too. That and shay not wanting sex period will (in my vision for s4) definitely be the biggest conflicts for shiny, but they'll work through them quickly bc unlike every other couple on this show they actually know how to communicate :)

-also how does tiny feel about the crash?? he looked all the way fucked up when they rushed him into the hospital so...he has to have some sorta trauma from that come on now

TRILES/MOLA

-this is gonna be messy lol. triles and mola are two very polarizing ships so we already kno theres gonna be some mess once tristans back at school. tristan may have been all "okay w/e idc" at the play but we all know once his petty ass is able to speak he's gonna go out of his way to make lolas life living hell. its truly gonna be slutshaming for days, and lets not forget the biphobia. he wont really direct any anger at miles, except tight-lipped quickly concealed bitterness. i can already picture these scenes yall like this is literally what is gonna happen WATCH.

-miles is of course gonna still feel guilty about the whole knocking her up thing, and he rly does love her and values her friendship (their friendship was so cute) so he's gonna want to keep hanging out with her (it’ll start off with just checking up on her every now and then like craig after manny’s abortion, but it’ll grow to miles getting an actual job at lola’s, etc). tristan will be okay with this on the surface but as soon as he and lola are alone (maybe tris is @ the hollingsworth household while lolas there for frankie or hell even miles and miles leaves to get some snacks or something) tristan just lays into her!! on some "you were NOTHING to him" shit. on some "you tried to trap him with a baby" shit!! some “he never loved you, just pitied you” shit!!!! and then tris is all back to smiles the second miles comes back. lola’s on the verge of tears but keeps this to herself cause she doesnt want to start drama so soon after tristan coming back and bc she loves miles too much etc etc. miles of course eventually finds out, and he and tris have the fight of the century where it ALL comes out.

-now I just read a list of PERFECT mola headcanons (by @beach-city-mystery-girl!) that should definitely happen throughout the season! idk if triles will stay together or if mola becomes official but at some point someones gonna be all "make. a. DECISION" at miles so!!

-lola should also find value in being alone and being comfortable with herself. she and yael become genuine friends (bc she needs someone outside of frankie and shay and miles) and form a weird almost symbiotic relationship where they give each other advice on things the other lacks. baaz flips between trying to flirt with her and making insensitive comments about her abortion. lola finally sets him straight for once and for all. 

-maybe something goes down at the restaurant? idk I just started caring about lola’s existence yesterday idk how this goes

-I think frankie eventually finds out that miles and lola hooked up, idk how but she does and she’s not happy about it yikes.

-actually after just reading another great post (by tristanmiligay), a lot of tristan’s insecurities could also lie in the fact that he’s disabled now. maybe miles rly wants to get tris up on his feet again and do something FUN and EXCITING but homeboi literally just got out of a coma and can’t make it, so I can see miles asking lola to go instead (like maybe its a couples thing and he already reserved it or w/e) and that kinda sets tristan off the first time. he’ll probably try to force himself to heal faster, maybe even injuring himself further in the process? he’s gonna have a lot of self-doubt and internalized ableism like the post said :/, and all of that is gonna manifest in hate for lola. 

ZASHA/GRONAH (is that what we're calling it??) 

-okay so this section is kinda tied into the maya section and rly just centered around grace so yeah. but thats mainly bc there wont rly be any drama between zasha (except like normal preparing for college type stuff, like zoe wants to go to some rly good school far away and rasha wants to stay in toronto bc she just got there).

-zoe's pretending to be fine with getting kicked out but its absolutely destroying her on the inside. she and her mom were so close despite everything. zoe starts going thru mad identity issues bc everything about her was sculpted by her mom. if shes not in her life anymore then who is she? she keeps replaying "i love you despite who you are" in her head and its killing her. she sometimes sneaks out of grace's room at night and leaves voice messages on her moms phone (which ms. Rivas never responds to) and ends every night crying on the couch. grace grows super concerned for her but has no idea how to balance both helping maya out and helping zoe. one day at school grace tries to confront zoe about the voicemails but zoe brushes it off and says something cute like "being with rasha makes it all worth it" but grace is still like 👀.

-grace then moves on to trying to help maya but maya is sick and tired of everyone walking on eggshells around her and she tells grace shes fine and that she needs to back off, but grace knows somethings still off. later that day she spots zoe in the student council office trying to call her mom and leaving an angry voicemail, ripping mama rivas to shreds!! "you were never a good mother, a mother who cant love her own daughter shouldnt even be having kids, i hate you, go to hell" type of shit. at the last minute she realizes she doesnt mean half of that (or she does mean it but that scares her) and tries to backtrack but by then the voicemail's already been sent. zoe starts freaking out and crying again and leaves another one like "im sorry I didnt mean any of that please just let me come back. Im sorry, im sorry, im sorry" like just saying sorry over and over again, and grace finally steps in like "sorry for the voicemail or sorry for being gay?" and confronts zoe again. zoe tries to get the attention off of her by asking about maya and grace is like "she's 'fine' just like how you're 'fine'. cut the bs binch" or whatever and zoe breaks all the way down, but before grace can comfort her she sees maya and esme fighting outside the office and she runs out to stop it. zoe, now that shes alone and still crying, contemplates self harming again (im gonna end this here cause this is long enough I deadass would write this whole episode if I could)

-anyway juggling between her upcoming surgery, college apps, and two lowkey suicidal best friends, grace is stressed tf out. this is where gronah steps in lol. i dont care much about jonah but i do know hes much more interesting and likeable when he's with grace. he gives her advice and shit and they go on a bunch of golfing dates, grace maybe takes him to yoga or something, they help each other with college apps, and well gronah happens! jonah basically goes from boring to manic pixie dream boy who tries to show grace that life is worth living and blah blah yall know the drill

-rasha needs a plot outside of zoe and i think her pursuing acting could be a thing!! she goes out to casting calls but every director says something along the line of "we just...envisioned someone else for the role" or "we dont rly think you'd...fit" bc shes muslim and then the one time she gets picked up for a student film, its about a terrorist attack and rasha doesnt realize until she shows up to rehearsal. she goes off on the director (and reminds her that most terrorist attacks are domestic lol) and runs off to goldi and they talk. maybe she tries to write her own webseries (probably with the help of winston) and it becomes a hit!! maybe we could have a probably cheesy as hell famous youtuber plot (and vijay gets jealous lol) and they have some sorta subscriber war where everyones taking sides. baaz, yael, and hunter try to sabotage rasha's show and bc our girl loves scheming she hits them back even harder :).

-also maybe we find out what happens to her friend back in syria? i dont want her to have too many depressing plots so maybe her friend is okay physically but not mentally and she has to deal with that :(

MAYA

-so like I already said maya's done with everyone bullshitting her and being overbearingly nice, so she starts closing herself off. this just makes everyone even more worried tho, so she forces herself back into music and her studies. grace and jonah are all over her, zig always looks guilty as fuck and treats her like a baby, miles forgot she existed but if they pass each other in the hall he'll ask how shes doing, zoe hugs her randomly one day, and esme...esmes the worst one. she starts lowkey stalking maya and its getting on her last nerve.

-she avoids saad like the plague at first, but eventually realizes that he's the only person who doesnt treat her any differently (or so she thinks). they go to the roof one day (cause that shit is never locked no matter how many suicide attempts happened up there) to talk things out, and saad completely switches gears. "what were you thinking??? why would you do that???" type of stuff. maya gets mad at him talks shit about his pictures maybe, idk. saad reminds her that its a coping mechanism after everything that happened in syria, maybe he says he once contemplated too?? idk all the ideas I have are depressing moving on

-one day maya explodes on everyone after she dissapears for a bit (umm maybe she was chosen to perform a song at a school event but, after hearing some girls talking about her suicide attempt in the bathroom, she decides to ditch) bc everyone (grace, jonah, zig, esme, zoe maybe) gang up on her to check if shes okay. she goes off, saying "none of you cared before i tried to kill myself so why care now?" and idk where I was going with this, I want maya happiness and closure but idk how to get there smh.

-uhh she finds hoot! she goes home after school and finds hoot stuffed in the back of her closet. she writes a bittersweet song and after a long talk with her mom, decides to call grace. maybe grace invites her over for a sleepover?? and zoe and maya can finally have a real conversation since The Incident too! Also grace can kinda kill 2 birds with one stone.

FRANKIE'S ANNOYING ASS

-I cant stand this child but shes the writers' baby so she'll get at least 5 main plots next season oh my god. My wishful thinking speaking, but maybe she'll learn its okay to be alone and finally learn to like herself! Hopefully she sees the value in sticking to the sidelines and helping her friends through their issues. Ooh, maybe she learns how to be a good ally after gorillagate and educates her brothers on why their many intolerances are wrong (lbr here, hunter probably uses "triggered" as an insult and continues to call all the refugees "scary", same with miles) BUT come on this is degrassi :) so the writers are probably gonna throw in a new male character for frankie to obsess over. Well, either a newbie or someone completely random thats already in the cast like fucking baaz or saad.

Z*SME

-zig and esme spend a lot of their time obsessing over maya I think, esme bc she sees her mom in maya and zig bc he feels like he made her do it. umm noah fence but i dont rly care about these two so thats all I got lol

if anyone has any specific headcanon requests I’d love some!

[celestialallstars]

Episode #4: “Everyone hates a puzzle god.” - Drew

This swap was PERFECTO, well, had I been on Nu Orfeo, it would have been but, Nu Tuatha was my next best choice and already it is great! I have Kori/Bryce and then Loris for sure. I talked with Mitch and Sharky a bit, so I'm optimistic on that. But I go and talk to Stephen. Lo & behold, he tells me there's a rumor that Kori and Bryce are working together. He says he heard it from Jared, but I figure hey, why am I not living a little? I say wow if we lose they go but...I immediately told Zach haha what he wishes to do with it is up to him, but if the rumor happens to spread, then I guess we'll see. If Mitch happened to feel this way, then I can at least use it to avoid being a target for a little while, even if I am sticking with KB.. this is gonna be one heck of an intriguing dynamic!

Oh my goodness, what a great swap! I got Chris, I got Bryce, and I got Mitch all of whom I doubt will be voting me. If I play my cards right I'll also be able to use this opportunity to get closer to Sharky or Loris in the event we never go to tribal. Ideally I wanna make sure me and Loris are especially good since Sharky seems the more likely first boot from our tribe.

I'm not sure what to make of this 24 hour challenge, wanna be optimistic but who knows.

I fucking love Alyssa, literally as soon as we swapped she looked at my teammates, messaged two of them to talk to me and gave me info on Zach and Stephen having history in the season. The equivalent of like "Okay go to the backdoor, meet the guard and tell them you like to fly with the eagles, he'll let you in, tell them you're with me and I'll leave the rest to you." So while yes I am the odd duckling out being the only one from Cyrena I'm going to do my best to work with what I have.

So not very much has changed on Tuatha as far as I can tell. My tribe winning the immunity challenge has helped me delay any confrontation between my 2 alliances which is great, as it should theoretically allow me to maintain relationships with all 6 members of the tribe. Still, it's going to keep being important to win immunity or pray for a swap in order to keep these groups from clashing.

Jared and Rhys are still a ? for me. I don't know why/how Rhys was able to convince Kori to invite Jared to the alliance of 5 instead of Mitch, and it worries me that those 2 may have a stronger bond than I immediately suspected. Hopefully I'll have an opportunity to deal with that when the time comes.

We're going to lose. I hate for it to sound so defeated/pessimistic, but the fact of the matter is unless we have a turn around in the AM, then I only see this setting the pace for the remainder. I know Bryce and Kori must be sleep. Mitch is trying, Loris possibly went back to sleep? And I guess Sharky is shooting for a late night swim or something. Regardless, I'm just already going over who the best person to leave would be for me. Unfortunately, with Kori/Bryce and then Loris, that only leaves me with Mitch or Sharky. Personally...I'd be open to Sharky, just cause, yea it would've been cool for Orfeo Seven to be a thing, but like I only feel secure with Zach/Loris and that's to a certain degree. All in all, this might be the tribal for Sharky to go and if the others are very sad over it, well, I guess they will have to come to terms with it.  I know Mitch is with Stephen and now that I know Steph is gonna probs wanna target Kori/Bryce, I'll need him and Mitch around for them to battle it out against each other...hmm decisions.

So we swapped. Yay. I have Jared. Yay. Stephen, eh kinda doesn’t speak to me a lot, well he speaks to me the least in my tribe. But we’re in an alliance. So I’m gonna have to figure how to navigate that.

Chloe Mo and a Zach all talk to me more than Stephen. So If I can figure out a way to maintain numbers and sack off Stephen, bye bye Stephen.

Also Mo is amazing. Staying up to try to prove worth in challenges 😍 no one deserves mo.

Y'all know me, one wrong social interaction which ends in humiliation or making me look like a dingus will ruin my entire day. Like oh no one laughed at my joke? Time to disappear into nothing and mope for a couple hours.

I’m lowkey scared about this challenge. I’m on my phone which sucks cause I can’t really do much in terms of puzzles. I can do them just always not the first one to finish. So looks like I’m not doing much yikes.

hi! we swapped! um. the last 2 hours. what a mess. so. like. kori posted a screenshot that showed the names of all his alliances and like. i told everyone maybe... ?? i told zach and then.. mitch.. and then.. i confronted bryce bc one was called 'three kings' so it was obv him chris and kori.. and bryce confirmed it. then sharky does the same thing but oh well thats insignificant hes only in 1. also. me and mitch r like. close now!! all because of this mess. but kori hates me. hehee

So the tribe swap has hit, and I'm back with my old pal Zach! You know, the person from my season who I tried to vote out like a million times before finally succeeding due to finding the idol at F5. Woohoo.

In all seriousness, though, I'm kinda happy to be on a tribe with him because he's a challenge beast and I don't think our relationship is totally unworkable. I made it clear to Zach as soon as the swap happened that I wanted to work with him, not against him, so hopefully that'll work out.

Chloe and Mo are 2 people I've also been working to get to know since the game began so I'm not too worried about them targeting me right away. I think this is a strong group overall.

And then there's Jared and Rhys. Probably not the first 2 people I would've chose to swap with but at the very least they both have incentive to keep me around. We are in an alliance together after all!

I made the decision to tell Chris about my situation with Mitch and the alliances on OG Tuatha because I really want them both to survive and unite with them at merge, and if Chris knows that Mitch was on the bottom of the totem pole on Tuatha, then maybe he'll take it into consideration.

So I had a glimmer of hope but we lost it and that's okay. I already prepared myself to vote for Sharky and it seems that is where we're headed...and yet craziness ensued in the time I was away! Kori accidentally reveals three kings and I try and do what I can to talk to others but nobody has said anything so they're either good at hiding things or they legit dropped it after questioning Bryce and Kori. ON TOP of it all, I learn from Loris that Sharkys alliance chat could be from an org..with Drew, Chloe and maybe Matt. It would definitely explain why Chloe didnt except the alliance offer..so that is fun. And now Stephen has told me he/Bryce/Kori/Rhys had majority alliance. So now I have a lot of info. It's just mattering how to use it

Shoutout to Drew for carrying everyone’s ass while drunk for half the challenge

I wanna explain my plan. It might sound ridiculous but... shut up. So I have this chart I made to show who’s doing the best and worst in challenges. I made four charts, three for each tribe, and one for everyone overall. The overall chart comes in handy if I make it to merge. So my dumb strategy is using said charts to kind of vaguely suggest who should be voted out each round. For example Tuatha is going to tribal and Mitch is doing the worst statistically so I can see him being eliminated (Mitch ily I’m sorry if you’re reading this). The bumpy part happens when and if I get to merge. Because then I’m going to be playing with a bunch of incredible comp players. My goal is to kind of use them as a way of getting to the end, by pinning them against one another until eventually it’s just me. Several problems in this plan, the first one is if my tribe goes to tribal which isn’t super severe because like I said I do feel comfy socially but I am doing the worst statistically so there’s a chance I could be eliminated. Second problem this is a very fragile plan and one crack could leave me looking like a goat trying to make something out of nothing and I’m not tryna get biggest goat in touchy subjects again. Will this all fail? Most likely. Am I gonna try to be a cool strategic genius? Yeah. But it’s worth a shot. Ok rereading this whole thing I’m kinda thinking this plan is garbo but I took so much time to write it so I’m gonna send it anyway.

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I’ve been like bouncing in between moods of. “I’m gonna be an early out” and “I’m gonna go far/win.” Right now I’m feeling like an early out again.

appreciation the thumbnail + title please.

God, the last 24 hours  could not have gone worst. We lost the challenge, AND I was such a dumb idiot that I posted a screenshot in the tribe chat where you could see my alliances.

So naturally I had to basically inform anyone I was aligned with that it happened. I feel like such a flop right now. I've missed the window 3 times for searching for an idol, and it's just like how can I be so absent minded. I need to get myself together if I want to even make the merge let alone win the game.

So far the only people I know for sure saw the Screenshot are Loris and Zach. Chances are other people know and just haven't told me. I'm just trying to keep a level head after having a mental breakdown over what an idiot I've been. We're at tribal and I'm hoping the votes on Sharky are there because we do talk the least. (I'd rather Loris goes but we're actually in a chat together because apparently Jared and him talk a ton.) I have 0 desire to keep working with Loris though, so if I can push it I wanna send Loris home next if we lose again, he literally went up to Bryce asking if he was in Three Kings and tried to draw attention to my screenshot without flat out saying it in tribe chat, asking Mitch if he saw it etc etc.

It's obvious he's trying to basically draw attention to me because I did win our season. His fake-nice apologeticism isn't fazing me. If it's genuine, well he's bad at seeming sincere then since the actions I've seen don't reflect it.

Boy I hope I wake up and get my shit together because I really need to. Granted I could also be seeing myself going right now, so who knows. I haven't been the most useful in the challenges even though I've never not been trying. So hopefully I stick around for awhile longer. I've still got so much more I've set out to do and I don't want to get sent home without accomplishing any of it.

So we SWAPPED and I wanna give a little bit of insight as to my thoughts. New tuatha consists of me loris chris sharky kori and bryce. The first challenge was this 24 hour puzzle crap where Zach and Drew H from the other respective tribes CARRIED their teams to victory. It is about 5 hours before tribal and I already feel like I am on the bottom again. IDK WHAT IM DOING WRONG. I always seem to be on the bottom premerge,  but thankfully this is how I flourish. I am SO good at getting out of situations like these and finding myself in a power position at merge because nobody wants to get rid of me. RN I created a chat with Loris and myself just so he can keep me updated on what is HAPPENING with chris and sharky, and i also have my old alliance with Jared and Stephen who i hope are doing ok. The targets for this round are me and sharky for being perceived as inactive. The vote should be 5-1 with Sharky going, but it HAS crossed my mind to throw a vote on like Bryce to shake the cage a little bit. I dont trust Bryce one bit and I feel like he'd throw me to the curb the first chance he gets unless loris keeps him in check.

Everyone hates a puzzle god mwah!!

Lol so we swapped, I get Michael and Alyssa but the former blue tribe has 4/6 majority here, I like them enough as people but like...we're just gonna go ahead and not go to tribal here, if I have to drag them to the immunity statue kicking and fucking screaming. Which is what I did. F17 ladies

Fourth tribal safe. It’s a weird feeling to be safe so many times in a row but I’m glad my all stars game is getting off to a strong start by making connections here there and everywhere. I’m praying for Sharky tonight because I know that he’s close to me and Chloe so if he goes it’s definitely worse case scenario.

So it seems sides are forming so that's cool. Mitch is possibly going to end up with me [and Loris] and then there would be Bryce and Kori. However, after chatting with Stephen and Jared yesterday, I've concluded that I am in a pickle! Let's say Kori/Bryce are legit about this Three Kings thing. Well, I know I'm a possible third wheel for it. On top of that, I'm assuming Mitch might get boned if we lose again, however, Stephen trusts Mitch a lot and so wants us to use him to take shots at Bryce/Kori if we lose again. Mind you, according to Jared, Stephen is a sneaky dude (Sneaky Pete), and him and Rhys don't trust him longterm. SO what does this all mean? All of my allies are hot messes. And on top of it all, I am beginning to feel for Sharky. Yes! I get that its been optimal for me to get him out, but it still sort of sucks now that I've talked with him more. Unfortunately, it is for the best he goes for my game right this instant and hopefully the wrath of him and his allies shant be too horrible.

So we swapped!!! And by some fucking miracle, we have a majority of me, jack, Alyssa and Bodhi. Was very unexpected tbh but we'll take it! Michael and Drew joined us which is good cause they r both v.good at challenges which I would hope means we can immunity run. Cause no thank u hate tribal not dealing with that. Drew also like carried us in the challenge which was a yeet, I swear I tried tho hehe. Mo and rhys I want to try and get to work together, would be very fun n flirty. Sharky messaged me like "lol I'm leaving" and if he does, I'm fucking fighting people, cause that is NOT ON. HE is my one true love and if he leaves I will be annoyed so much and will be quite fucked tbh.love that for me!!

at orientation last year we were told about a “rule of 7” to not overcommit ourselves. I’ve just about doubled that threshold and depending how the next few days go it might go even higher. Pray for me.

I wish I had more energy to dedicate to this game but i need to fucking relax in my free time. So I’ll talk to people at my current rate and hopefully that’ll get me to merge. Then I’ll drop all other responsibilities and fucking dominate.

I really think the game is starting to slow down for me. Now what I mean by that is I am continuing to get more woke and more misty, and the aura of this being all stars and the spectacle of the other players being so great is starting to dissapear.

I feel very much as though I have perfected my craft in terms of how I like to play, and I'm doing it very well here. It's cool to think about on a meta level like from AnnaJane's perspective: "oh my god Jared did really well for himself in Wakea and had major influence to where some people couldn't even notice, I wonder how he'll stack up against these all stars." I can feel myself back in that zone and coming into my own even in this field. To the point where these legends like Chris and Bryce and Sharky, I know deep down that I can play ball with them. Now, they may beat me at the end of the day and I may go home at some point, but I can understand even at this moment that I am probably top 3 if not the #1 best player here. Or at least I CAN be.

I want to zoom in on this and really get my shit together and take advantage of what is in front of me because with the game dynamics as they are, I can very clearly see myself as the winner. I need to keep doing what I'm doing, but at the same time make myself dissapear and be able to do this undetected.

My new strategy is called "fast and loose" because I'm going to get into these conversations, knock it out of the park and get out. Leave people feeling good about me every time I leave the room. I don't need to spend a ton of time working on anyone to the point they can tell what I'm doing. Calls? After tonight they are done. Not calling with anybody unless they ask. I want to be gaining social capital and influencing people's decisions without being detected so it has to be a hit and run.

I will reevaluate my position soon and probably recalculate my alliances, maybe I was wrong about Stephen and I need to get closer with him while no one else is. But at this moment I need targets going into the merge. That's how I'm gonna set it up. I want everyone to be shooting at each other and then at the key moment boom challenge advantage, boom idol, boom you gotta vote out Bryce can't vote for me, oh look I'm at the end.

Having the One World twist is so interesting because in a usual game when you don’t know everyone until you get to merge usually. You don’t know what’s going on, on the enemy tribe, you don’t know who’s inactive, who is starting drama or who is messy in challenges. Because you’re focusing all your social energy into your tribe alone so when someone you haven’t made contact with on the enemy tribe gets eliminated you think nothing of it. But here there are no walls, you can see and communicate with everyone and it’s in your best interest to focus your social energy into the one world chat because that’s what everyone else is doing. So my point in saying this is it’s now incredibly difficult to imagine having to lose 8 people before we get to the final 10. Because literally everyone is social, there are like two quiet people but everyone else you talk to on the daily and everyone is kicking ass in these challenges (except like two people). I think that’s why I keep thinking myself as an early out is because it’s so hard to imagine anyone else getting voted out. But fuck that I got shit to prove.

I can’t even begin to explain how it feels to have been immune for 10 days in a row. My glow up front wakea is real.

Bodhi wants to get the 4 of us OG Cyrena's in a majority alliance, which is super convenient bc we can just combine our alliances into one. Problem is? I would HATE to vote either Drew or Michael out, especially given Drew singlehandedly got us immunity this time. So if there was ever time for an immunity streak...

Also I keep forgetting to search for idols this is why I never find one

________________________________________________________________

Sharky is voted out 5-1.

[nauseoussuggestion]

we were going through a sort of imaginative prayer today at this jr core retreat. the idea was to have this conversation with Jesus. the first prompt was to close your eyes and put yourself somewhere youre comfortable in whether it be at home or at some paradise

it took a lot of tries to see where i was with Jesus. first it was the fence in front of the house at night, which was where i went w andrew after i walked out of my moms car and ran off. then it was the godspell set and all four of the people i saw it with were there. then it was just me and the guy who played Jesus. then it was my emo corner in the church. i settled on the white bench beside the door and gate at the light house. it was hard to have a conversation with him. the only image i would see of Jesus was that of my role models and spiritual leaders like chavez or andrew or geo or that guy who played Jesus in godspell. i probably shouldnt be doing all this name dropping. one of the prompts was to look Jesus in the eye during your conversation. there were reminders throughout to keep breathing and looking in Jesuss eyes but the entire time it was the eyes of,, them yknow. i eventually got in the vibe of it and it was flashing in and out but i was there. this was the reading they were saying (it was around the time i had already started the convo). its one of the two options of Gospel readings we had during pentecost sunday this year. i heard it yesterday during tntt but i never wrapped my head around it. i have a soft spot for pentecost in my heart bc it always seemed so changing. the apostles were a mess and fire happened and i felt from day 1 it was a day of change and courage and confirmation. 

JN 15:26-27; 16:12-15

Jesus said to his disciples: "When the Advocate comes whom I will send you from the Father, the Spirit of truth that proceeds from the Father, “Spirit of truth”. God asked me if i knew he loved me. i said yes. i then asked him why i couldnt love him. thats the first time i admitted to myself that. 

he will testify to me. And you also testify, because you have been with me from the beginning. “you also testify” i thought about the fact that ive wanted to do testimonies for so long. how i dont have the courage to and how i dont have enough to say. i asked God again why i didnt love him. “because you have been with me from the beginning” im probably interpreting this wrong but ig i felt like God was giving me a high five for believing in him and that i knew hes been there since day 1. that i stayed here even if i didnt feel authentic or worth.  "I have much more to tell you, but you cannot bear it now. this one hurt. its stupid but i thought of it as God not being able to tell me why i couldnt love him. i do i think. i dont know how to feel it and i dont know how to act on it through prayer but i believe in God. im just bad at this. the better interpretatino of this is probably to say ‘hey man right now you dont know why youre so apathetic and unfeeling towards God. hell tell you eventually’ But when he comes, the Spirit of truth, he will guide you to all truth. He will not speak on his own, but he will speak what he hears, didn’t think much during abt this part. was focused on the whole ‘God aint telling you the truth yet’  and will declare to you the things that are coming. hopefully my death? i want nothing more than to be rid of my inability to focus on what matters He will glorify me, because he will take from what is mine and declare it to you. Everything that the Father has is mine; for this reason I told you that he will take from what is mine and declare it to you." this ones. oof. “take from what is mine and declare it to you” i heard Jesus say hed give me the love he has for humanity to me. i heard my dad saying that everything he owned, money or otherwise, was mine to have. the love Jesus has for humanity. dang. 

my mindset in the faith is wrong i know it. this was such a weird prayerful raw moment for me though i needed to write it down somewhere. i cant forget this one. i dont know what it means to love God and i dont know if i do. i mean i know i do but at the same time all these actions and genuine forgetting of him. yikes. i dont know. its not just “hey i dont talk to you anymore i dont love you anymore”. i dont know how to explain it. the sharing of love Jesus has for humanity really comforted me though. i don tknow what to do with all of this i feel so lost and scared and stupid and damned to hell.

[survivormoheli]

Tribal Council #5 - One World

Welcome, everyone, to our one world tribal council where only the Ouani tribe can be voted out.

Eric, Blake, and Elliot, as this is your first tribal council, please dip your torches.

AnnMarie, how important is trust in a tribal council this big? Do you trust anyone who comes to you, or are you skeptical of everyone?

I'm open to all discussions with everybody in a tribal so large. Trust is important, but easy to maintain. To me, you are innocent until proven guilty, and unless you have lied to me, I'm open to any idea you may have. No plan is good or bad, and nobody is truly good and evil in a game like this.

Blake, you had the worst score in the challenge. Do you think this will ultimately put a target on your back? Do you think the strategy is past ‘keep the tribe strong’?

Ultimately I hope my GOD awful score doesn't put a target on my back... but hey who knows they may be thinking about the merge and be like well that kid wont be any competition for individual immunity so lets keep him around. The strategy about keeping the tribe strong I don't know if that is so relevant now bc so many people have formed relationships. But if my tribe still wants a strong team then I may be on the chopping block...

Bryan, how confident are you in the game post-one world? Do you think your position on your new tribe will be solid after all of this round’s drama?

Dani, after getting a strike in the challenge, do you think you’ll be targeted? How do you assure your fellow players that you’ll be active enough to take part in their plans?

Oh Jay... ENOUGH! Enough is ENOUGH IVE HAD IT! I feel like I’m taking CRAZY pills every time you ask me a god forsaken question... anyways. To answer your question. First of all, I didn’t understand the challenge and had no desire to understand it. Second of all, I had to volunteer all day today so I was just not for it. In other words, Yes. I AM ACTIVE ENOUGH.

Elliot, how has the tribe swap influenced game dynamics? Do you feel more solid with your new tribe or with the old? How do you think the game will have changed after this one world tribal?

The tribe swap has definitely changed the game- you get comfortable and then the tribes all swap around. While there are people I trust on both my tribe, and people I don't, for me this vote comes down to who I think has been the most genuine with me, and while that might alienate me from some people that's a risk I'm going to have to take.

Eric, congratulations on attending your first tribal council this late in the game! How do you sus out where the vote is since you don’t have prior experience with tribals? How do you maximize this opportunity to send the right person home?

Thanks for the warm welcome! haha It's kind of exciting to finally be at a tribal council, especially one where I'm immune. I guess it's important to take the time to chat with others, see how they all feel and take the time to understand what's truly going on. This is a very unique opportunity since everybody on the game is here to vote and it can create a unique voting trend.

Andreas, how much do you think old tribal lines and old alliances will influence this vote?

This vote is all about old tribal lines and old alliances. So I think, this will influence the vote for 100%.

JG, there’s no way for a majority alliance to have existed since tribes are currently smaller than the number needed for a majority, so how do votes get determined in a one world tribal? Is there a cohesive voting block, or will it be a heavily split vote?

Honestly, we won't know until tribal. There are so many strong players who want to still be here the next round and with so few people to be voted its gonna make for a interesting tribal .... I also think this has the potential to shake up any pre-existing shiz. .... oh and hi lynn

Lynn, after the drama between you and JG last round, do you think that animosity will come to a head as you’re one of the people who could potentially be eliminated?

Um the animosity is most definitely coming to a head. I mean even now everyone can obviously see JG doesn’t know how to keep my name from out of his messages to the gc so far. there’s no way you can stop people from believing what they want and JG is obviously coming after me so we’ll see what happens.

Phoenix, what do you think of Tara’s decision to make one world happen?

I mean, I know she was in a rush and people wanted it to happen, so it happened. I don't blame her or anything haha

Raffy, as the numbers dwindle down, how do you set yourself up to be in a good position for the merge?

You be social and hope to god people are being truthful. I want to trust people, but this is Survivor. Trust only goes as far as the things backing up that trust. When people vote together, you trust them. However, things can shift dramatically within the span of one tribal. I don't know how to set myself up for merge, but I pray to god that I am doing all that I can

Richie, my question to you is as simple as it is classic: what will you be basing your vote on tonight?

what will i be basing my vote on tonight???? well i'm safe and so is everyone on our tribe so my stake in this vote is hopefully going to make a proactive move that will help make the next vote i'm not safe at a little bit more manageable?????????

Tara, let us in on the logic behind putting the one world tribal in place. Do you think this will help you seem MORE or LESS trustworthy long term?

umm i honestly was just like walking down a rly busy corridor and i was stressing bcos i had to answer quick bcos i had already kept ppl waiting like 20 minutes so i asked in the tribe chat what ppl wanted n ya here we are. umm i honestly don't know what ppl will think of this! i hope they take the time to make new friends and have fun and not stress too much.

Tim, on a scale of 1-10, how rat-like/snake-like is this game? Do you feel you’re playing with trustworthy people, or are you constantly watching your back?

On a scale of one to 10 I'd have to rate the game as of now as a 6. There ARE snakes somewhere because they are inevitable. However, there are different types. You have your garden snake, small and sneaky but common and mostly harmless when they bite. Your Phythons, the big bad snakes who think they're running the show but their fangs hold no venom. They are only deadly one you've came within their ever so "trusting" grip, but from a distance, they are spottable if you know what you are looking for. Finally you have your Black Mambas. NOW these snakes... are deadly asf. You may not even see them coming but once they bite your life in the game is up. I'd advise that you stay as far away as possible from this breed but their camoflage leaves you unable to know who or where they are.

I feel as though everyone is trustworthy but the extent at which they are varies depending on the context of the situation as well as your previous trust.

I’ll read the votes.

First Vote: Bryan

¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Second Vote: Blake

you did not speak to me. you tried to do something way beyond your ability. you were messy. good bye.

Third Vote: Bryan:

Under his eye

Fourth Vote: Blake

That’s two votes Bryan, two votes Blake, 10 votes left.

Fifth Vote: Bryan

Out! OUT! GET OUT!

Sixth Vote: Blake

sorry I have to stick to my guns ....

That’s three votes Bryan, three votes Blake, 8 votes left.

Seventh Vote: Bryan

in tears uh, hey everyone… karma got its kiss for me! puckers lips uh i cant go to JONATHAN’S right now because i got a…. a ticket because apparently you’resupposedtopulloverforanemergencyvehicle and i didn’t know laughs listen, my life is extremely going downhill cause im getting acne, and im getting fat and im blading right here if you cant see the whole triangle there like a piece of hair, im balding IM BALDING i’m turning ugly and my face is going to be fat for the rest of the day and i cant even SHOWER BEFORE WORK because im not going to be home on time! and that fat ass indiana cries the fat ass indiana cop…. gave me a ticket…. and he’s like “do you know about this law?” i didn’t so i said “no”… because i didnt talking through tears and it’s so much money and i only have FOURTY SEVEN DOLLARS and im not even supposed to go under fifty and im going to get fined by my bank

try not to hold-

SHUT UUUUUUUUUUUUUUP!! im going to get fined by my bank for having under fifty dollars ♫ and i already owe my parents four hundred something dollars and i owe my friend’s mom eighty and i cant get a job now but everything’s fine cough and im oKAY and my parents are really mad at me and my life is going downhiiiill ♫ so if anyone wants to be like a nice person laughs through tears and give me money to pay for this fucking ticket because i dont have it inhales i’mgoingtoleavemypaypal link but like winks thats me winking BUT MY EYES ARE TOO SWOLLEN TO WINK cries and i called to see if i could serve jail time instead of paying but no one answered so i left a voicemail asking if it were an option for me to serve jail time instead of paying inhales you’re going to get arrested for that they’re going to be like this dumbest bitch then they’re going to arrest you crying isn’t that the point that’s what he wants and my friends are laughing while i’m having an emotional breakdown crying SHOW ME SUPPOOOOOOORT crying laughing screams into pillow

Eighth Vote: Bryan

it's hard to not take an opportunity like this to vote out a very strong and experienced player. I wish you the best!

Ninth Vote: Bryan

It sucks that you have to go home but sometimes it be like that

Tenth vote, and the next person voted out of Survivor Athena Moheli: Bryan

Lol sorry bud

The remaining votes were also for Bryan.

Eleventh Vote: Bryan

You're a really nice dude, it just has to be done

Twelfth Vote: Bryan

¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Thirteenth Vote: Bryan

Fourteenth vote:

Bryan, you will have a few moments to send any last words before everyone is removed from this chat.

[cow3survivor]

Ep. 5: “Nothing to Report” - Jabari

JENNET 

jennet vs ethan? more like jennet + ethan😀😀😉😉

(a little later)

plan was a success, i know thats right!

ETHAN

Somehow the Pennino vote worked, and Pennino if you are reading this, you really are an amazing guy, and I hope we get a second chance someday. That being said, you are too smart and self-aware, and that is dangerous. For this round, the reward challenge is interesting. I haven't met everyone in the game yet, so I don't know if people are looking at challenge results yet, and I have done my best to have middling performances, but winning this would mean I get put in the spotlight again for winning 2 individual rewards, so that potentially makes me nervous. More than anything, I want to avoid tribal, I don't think there would be a repeat of last time if we go again. I anticipate a swap in 1-2 more votes, either to 2 or 4 tribes. Video conf coming soon :D

JABARI

The girls and I flopped on the reward challenge and Ethan came up like a beast. I really feel out tribe of 5 is doing well and hopefully we can pull win and stay together. If not I Imagine Sam will be out, as for idol searches nothing to report though I feel I am getting close.

JAKE

https://youtu.be/FM19WJ1tTmk witty catchphrase, y'know?

SAM

https://youtu.be/MrYZw3I22ms

JESSICA

Me when I found the idol: :) Me when the hosts told me I had to gamble my vote like 13 times in order to get it: :( I really wish we’d lost now so Nicole could be out and I could have an idol! If we don’t swap next time and it’s there, I’m taking the idol and throwing the challenge. Then we can vote Nicole out and I can have an idol! Will my allies be suspicious that I didn’t vote at that tribal? Not if it’s unanimous for Nicole which you KNOW I’d be doing the work to make happen. If we do swap, I’ll probably go get the idol anyways UNLESS we swap to tribes of 5 and my tribe is bad. But even then, I might as well go get it because I could play it that round if I needed to. Um not much else happened this round! I hope we merge soon.

LINDSAY

sorry ur getting text today ok im so fucin ajfdkhsakjlfhsalkjfhskjfhksjd i hate this anyways i think the tribe is split into two duos and then me - jennet and jabari /ethan and sam. pennino was kinda my duo but also eh. i think ethan has an idol or at the very least an advantage. a f r a i d not sure what to do. could stick w jennet and jabari and hope for the best or preemptively flip and try to make it w ethan and sam... i think there'll be a tribe swap soon but ajsfhsaldfhsdkj afraid if there's too few calumma come merge we'll be fucked but sokka pulled it off before it's not impossible we'll be okay depending. but if i piss off jennet or jabari calumma might not vibe w me following so i'll be stuck at the bottom of the totem pole w old not calumma and that's not a good spot to be either.  :( my "lets do something fun" says lets flip fuck it, but my loyal ass/wants to make it to merge this game ass says sticking w calumma is my best bet. jabari was posting cryptic shit last night so im gonna lead into that and see what hapepns anyways fuck this tribal. fuck tribal. i love all of these people i dont want to vote them out like genuinely there's no one here i want to see gone i HATE THIS anyways if i flip on calumma id probably go jennet bc she's a bigger threat than jabari iirc and if i stay loyal i'd probably aim for ethan bc sam is the more obvious target i... think?

JONES

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ApcRUkdtxm4

JENNET

going go tribal again im SUPER nervous... i formed a tight alliance with ethan and sam and i feel bad for betraying the girls but this will help propel me in the long run and i have to take this shot

JESSICA

REALLY hoping we don't swap tonight...... that way I can instantly go get the idol! Or if we do swap, I hope I stay on Calumma. I think I should have actually just gone for the idol but I was worried about needing my vote at next tribal and not knowing what's ahead. Like imagine if I went for it, I lost my vote, and I only got the idol to be good for one round. Or for no rounds. It literally would have been useless and I would hate to swap and have no idol AND no vote. At least now if we swap, I definitely have one of those things! I'm not interested in gambling everything to get nothing so it just didn't seem like a smart choice. I did consider taking it and only gambling once just so Nicole definitely didn't get the idol but that didn't seem like a good idea. She only has like a 1/25 chance of finding it IF she's been guessing every single day and even if she does find it and we don't swap, my guess is Pete will want to throw his vote on Mikey which is fine with me because that is their relationship that will be affected, not mine. 24/25 odds Nicole has no idol is better than a 1/13 chance of losing my vote right? I'm honestly not sure as I still to this day cannot do any math <3 I have been saying this whole game I think we're going to swap at 15 into 3 tribes of 5 so hopefully I am wrong! And we swap at 14 or even better do not swap at all again until the merge. At least I will know who could have the idol if we swap. Narrowing this down is useful, as is knowing that the all 3 pre-merge tribe idols likely have expirations close to final 8/9 and probably aren't good until f5. Plus I'll get the chance to try and get another idol from a different tribe (or find out that someone else already has it too!). You may notice I didn't mention my other teammates in this confessional. Well that is because none of them are really here and nothing is going on since we've been winning. I have still been talking to Mikey and Pete on and off but Lovelis seems to be pretty busy so he hasn't been here. And Nicole...... has left me on read again. We just do not know what is going on there.

LOVELIS

WOO we won immunity!! I'm anticipating a swap soon so I'm tryna stay as cool with Mikey and Nicole as I can just in case I'm put on a tribe with them again, but I do hope I can stay with Shane or Jessica in the future because those two are the ones I get on with the most for sure, and I'd feel more comfortable moving forward on a tribe with them for now! I don't think Nicole has any trust in me after the Nash elimination so I'd be more weary if I had to work with her in order to save myself in the long run, but let's see what the future holds shall we!

SAM

https://youtu.be/F0Zt0L8lScA

ETHAN

Ok this tribal is terrifying. Apparently lindsay and jabari are trying to blindside me by telling me the vote is Sam, and this could be a super good bait from Jennet to try to get Sam to idol. If they’re playing logically, they vote Sam if that’s the case anyways. It wouldn’t make much sense for Jennet to spill, not vote with us, and vote for me, I hope these people are logical, because I’m operating under the assumption that they are.

MADISON

I honestly have to laugh at Shane messing up 2 times during the challenges, us having the lowest counting score, and still being immune at the end of the day. It's truly beautiful. Daisy won the reward so she will be attending the tribal tonight and I hope she can give us an idea of how the dynamics are on another tribe. It's hard when there hasn't really been much to do on Brookesia so having a little bit of info could go a long way in this game.

NICOLE

Hello! So we won. I was having a little bit of a hard time this round if I'm being honest so I'm glad we won immunity because I think I definitely would have hit the road if we did not. Logic puzzles are really gonna be my legacy in this game huh...anyway, I have been searching for idols everyday and have not found ANYTHING except a second guess which I already used to find nothing. Even worse it seems that everywhere I look something has already been found! Which means other people have things! Which stinks. But, I think I'm in a pretty good spot if we swap after this round.  But if we stay on this tribe....yikes!

JENNET 

super nervous, i have TWO alliances with the same name... hoping that helps me at tribal so when i say the name of it, both groups thinks its them😳😳

(a little later)

told ethan and sam what jabari and lindsay have planned for them... hoping it doesnt blow up in my face

(after searching for an idol)

was hoping to vote out lindsay bc shes been playing this like shes our leader but shes the stronger competitor and i dont want to push sam and ethan too much

SHANE

https://drive.google.com/drive/folders/1-RKbRCfntNc75XUsCg7iKmFfxne0qcMt

SAMMY

i feel like this game is nonexistent lately...I do want to say Shane is lucky bc in the counting challenge he messes up like 2-3 times and i was like ...blinks.... idk but luckily we managed to escape tribal council once again so our odds going far and having numbers are pretty high I’d say? I feel like a swap is coming tho so I’m a bit nervous! My confessionals are gonna remain dry for now sorry mwah

DAISY

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fuVm7kTkEL4 ugh sorry its so shitty this didnt go as planned and i give up. love u all. kiss kisss

PETE

I’m pretty sure Nicole may still get numbers against me when the time comes. I’m nervous for a merge but honestly i’ll be grateful if I even make it to one for the first time lmao like at this point I may have a few numbers but I’m hoping another struggling alliance picks Jessica and I up at the merge and we can rest in majority for a little bit at the start of it. I was thinking about maybe throwing one challenge so we can either A. Vote off Nicole who is a big threat and could do damage later on. or B. Vote off Mikey who could be a secret snake which could win a couple more trust points with Nicole and maybe pick up and ally there. I’m not sure. I did save Nicole in one light by redirecting my alliance’s target from her to Nash, but in another, I didn’t side with her in voting off Mikey so she lost her ally. It’s complex, I feel like throwing a challenge AND not throwing a challenge could both be the mistake I look back on when I get voted out later on. i dunno send help lmao

TRIBAL COUNCIL

JABARI EXIT INTERVIEW