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insertdisc5 · 3 years

Note

Hi!! I wanted to ask, in celebration of Deltarune CH. 2, do you have any updated thoughts and head canons about the game?? Like, y'know, similar to a previous ask about Kris in your Deltarune tag? Thanks!

thoughts on kris part 2 i guess???? (part 1 from ch1 here lol)

spoilers for deltarune like woah. this wont be kris focused just random thoughts on everything. thank you for giving me the opportunity to talk

not that many thoughts for this chapter tbh! EDIT LOL: this was a lie i have a lot of thoughts

-just in general i feel like the player isn't the only one controlling kris... like yes the player forced kris to do what happened in the snowgrave route but AT THE SAME TIME idk it feels like there's someone else too. just because of the terrifying voice i suppose. and also the jerky movement kris does every time they get their soul out? unless there's another reason for it... maybe getting your soul out means you walk weird lol

-BUT ALSO i feel like kris is 100% in control when they create fountains. idk it just makes sense kris would create them. to create another world, a better world, A WORLD WHERE THEIR BROTHER IS HERE PERHAPS? i do wonder why they get their soul out then though. i'm all for it sweetie! do whatever! i support you!

-(i am and will be playing deltarune with only kris' best interests in mind. i will not hurt anyone unless kris wants me to. dont worry my little meow meow im on your side! talk to me! no? okay ill stay under the sink its fine)

-speaking of asriel. SUMMER VACATION COLLEGE WHEN? SUMMER VACATION COLLEGE WHEN? SUMMER (starts crying) V-VACATION COLLEGE WHEN

-kris misses their brother so much it's so sad. if you make kris steal 5$ from asriel they take it "reluctantly"? talking to asriel online so often even alphys knows?? the google search?? GOING INTO ASRIEL'S GOOGLE SEARCH ROOM WITH THEIR EYES CLOSED BECAUSE THEY'RE CONVINCED THEY ALREADY KNOW WHATS IN THERE? THAT ONE IS LESS OF A MISSING THING BUT IM LIKE OH MY GOD

-the city walk with susie at the end makes it clear to me that kris really values susie's friendship... kris even sits with her if you spend long enough near the lake like aaaaah ;_;

-and even in snowgrave you spend your last acts with the final boss calling for your friends like YES there's a way bigger creepy aspect to this (kris as more of a Leader who Commands and commands their subjects to come) but still :'0 (and then noelle answers oh my god noelle im so sorry for the trauma)

-berdly. listen. listen. listen. liste

-berdly sucks but [berdly hurts his arm in the battle against queen if you don't save him because he doesnt want to hurt you] [berdly realizing smg's wrong in snowgrave and immediately taking steps to save noelle] berdly is my little crumb nugget. i will protect him.

-noelle. noelle. girlboss!

-like ooooh listen. hearing about the genocide path for undertale. made me go "that is SO COOL. i HAVE to experience it myself this is great. hehehe killing time" and like no regrets. i was fully enjoying the experience knowing i was an awful person. SNOWGRAVE THOUGH. i will never try this myself its too fucked up. casually grooming your childhood friend to murder people <3 and also acting like a weird stalker towards her <3 stockholm syndrome speedrun i will get all the info i can about this but i will never do this myself

-people remarking the kris/player>noelle relationship is similar to the relationship between player>chara in genocide path is like yes. chefs kiss. don't worry we just are making you stronger and everything will be fine "you made me kill my friend? and for what?" this is fine sweetie don't worry about it!!!!!!

-like the amount of details added to snowgrave, like if you equip noelle's watch she notices later? and her battle animations change as time goes on, she gets an ice shield and stops sighing in relief after battle? oh my god? oh my god.

-(berdly is not awake.) JUST KILL ME RIGHT HERE I HAVEN'T STOPPED THINKING ABOUT BERDLY NOT BEING AWAKE!!!!!

-also why didnt he turn into dust. so many possible reasons. is magic a thing in the normal world and perhaps no magic means no dust (theres graves). maybe he isnt dead. maybe hes braindead. maybe he'll come back. either way that boy is now in the closet big enough to put someone in

-also dess' name probably being december AND THATS WHY NOELLE LOST THE SPELLING BEE?!?!??! FUCK ME UP!!!!! JUST FUCK ME UP!!!!!!! OH MY GOD!!!!!!

-also so many good pixel art this chapter. too many? i didnt need pixel art of cardboard noelle falling on the statue. like thank you but please. please it hurts my game artist brain.

-the expressions in this chapter were also top notch. all the unsettling noelle expressions like (i fall over face first)

-i threw away the ball of junk (which i already tried in ch1) and this time the game was like "ARE YOU SURE BC THIS IS A BAD IDEA" and kris felt bitter :'( (it deletes all your items in the dark world)

-i uh fucked up and skipped the susie+noelle scene bc listen last time ralsei mentionned seeing what susie is doing we missed some PRIMO LORE. turns out it just makes you skip the scene and you dont get anything new. welp

-speaking of ralsei well you know. he exists. but im stuck on him going "i just wonder what being ralsei-like even is...?" ralsei my dude there's so much i could say about this. do you feel like you can't be ralsei-like because you feel like you have to be asriel-like

-but also that makes no sense bc susie hasnt even mentioned ralsei looks like asriel. and i cant imagine asriel being so meek. so WHAT GIVES

-ralsei as kris’ “i wish i was a monster just like my bro and family and i’d look like asriel but with red horns [THE HALLOWEEN COSTUME] and my name would be something cool like ralsei instead of a boring human name like kris and im sweet and cute because thats how i act with asriel because ASRIEL MADE ME” theory because that would be cute.

-ASRIEL GOING TO THE CHURCH TO CONFESS HIS "SINS" WHEN "SINS" AREN'T A THING IN THE ANGEL BELIEF LIKE I KNOW THIS INTERACTION WAS TREATED AS A JOKE BUT WHAT THE FUCK ASRIEL?

-kris definitely has a connection with the big red door in the city, judging by what the kids say they probably went there... i feel like this place's dark world will be the Final Dungeon you KNOW some shit happened there. also the sounds you hear when you go there is the phone dark world call's sound slowed down? AND AFTER SNOWGRAVE APPARENTLY YOU CANT HEAR IT ANYMORE? HUWAH?

-speaking of songs the songs were all so good, My Castle Town rules, the berdly snowgrave music is stuck in my head, flashback is uwah wuahah, Until Next Time is so good, AND ALSO A FRIEND NOTICED THE DARK WORLD CITY THEME IS JUST tHE SONG 74 (MOST NOTICEABLE WITH THE SNOWGRAVE VERSION)?????? WHAT DOES IT MEAN????? it might be just "hey its just reuse" BUT MR FOX YOU KNOW WE'RE GONNA READ INTO THIS IS NOELLE THE ONE SINGING IDK BRO!!!!!!!!!!

-asgore dreemurr fired from the force what happun!!!!! game theory is that asgore is related to dess' death/disappearance but eh who knows

-you start the chapter at lvl2 and get to lvl3 after the final boss, a friend mentioned this is probably because we destroyed a world and im :0

-to go back to kris it's still so interesting to figure out who they are based on how they act/people mention them. like kris shaking the ferris wheel car? yeah makes sense i can imagine a pranking kid do this. kris' dance? yeah thats a little silly but i can buy it. doing cool anime poses? well i dunno this doesnt line up PERFECTLY but sure. BUT EVERYTHING THAT HAPPENS IN SNOWGRAVE... especially >proceed like that is such a weird thing that i can't imagine them doing, but i can't completely see the "player" doing either (compare with going to sans -which kris doesnt know- and going "SANS!" because of course the player would know sans), like THATS one of the reasons i feel like there's someone else in there. the weird robotic merciless actions. if im going super meta it feels like there'd be someone else like writing the choices into existence for us to pick you know? gaster probably? god i need to read more gaster theories i completely sidestepped the gaster shit bc i wasnt interested. anyway just spitballing

-(looks at big shot guy) please dont make him the next tumblr guy i beg you

-obligatory "queen was great" mention if only because this part made me laugh a little bit too hard

that was a lot. thank you for letting me talk

#ask tag #deltarune #deltarune spoilers #snowgrave spoilers

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ed-recovery-affirmations · 2 years

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Thank you for replying to my ask and having this blog! I didn't want to tell any detail about my ed I thought that would be very triggering for some people cause it's about losing and gaining weight and dieting so trigger warning!!

But I guess I have always had since high school disturbed body image because diet culture starts affecting you very early on.

In college when I have had depressive episodes one way to cope was restricting my eating and then when I lost the weight I gained when depressed I started to feel better and it was like this yo-yo ish many years.

But oh god last year I had so many things that caused me stress I was living in a survival mode the whole 2021 and maybe still am, and idk why I gained weight guickly maybe it was many things combined. Then when things were bad my bf left me and my friends didn't help me and I was left kinda alone and the only way to cope again was thinking of losing weight. So this is such a classic but my ed was the symptom of my hard life situation and way to cope with the anxiety and stress.

But restricting my eating didnt 'work 'like it used to in the past, I havent been able to lose the gained weight and so my energy and time is still focused on losing that weight even now when im my life situation has improved a bit.

I have talk about my issues with doctors and I feel they haven't been taking my symptoms seriously or have focused just on my depression and anxiety (which are caused by ed so this is a fun cycle). Yesterday I talked to a nutritionist for the first time since applying help and she just said what I already know that even tho ed is a mental health problem the only way to cure is by eating. And that I should stop thinking about losing weight cause that only worsens everything (yeah no shit). And that she can't help me cope with the anxiety it's the other healthcare system that should (have) do(ne) that.

The thing is I have triedddd so much this whole time to take care of my eating but if I had succeeded I wouldn't be having any problems with it still u know?

It's kinda ironic how much I know about ed without being able to do anything. First I need to fix my nutritional status I think that's where everyone starts. And after that maybe intuition eating. I need to learn dbt skill to cope with anxiety and depression. And stop stressing about everything everywhere qll the time. Buying new clothes that fit so looking at my too small clothes wouldn't be so triggering. I need to learn self compassion and find a therapist but they are in high demand so that's really hard. I need to find things that I like about myself and repeat those. But everytime when I fail at trying to fix my daily routine and fix my eating routine I think of it as a setback and its a cycle very hard to get off (I need to wake up early to eat breakfast and lunch early so I wouldn't be so hungry at evening and night cause then I can't sleep properly and then I sleep in and then I eat late and then im hungry at evening and night cause I don't wanna eat too much in the evening and then I sleep in cause my blood sugar is so low from not eating enough in the evening does this make any sense at all) and I think I have ibs from so much stress and I think that's actually the reason I have gained weight like I'm bloated all the time. And i dont have any support cause my depression/ ed made me also isolate from my friends and/or they kinda left me also so yeah. Ummmmm this became a lot longer than i thought. if you read this all thank you and also sorry for dumping all my problems here

Sorry that it took me so long to respond to this - my own life situation is kind of taking a toll on me rn, and I've been slow to respond to people. That will continue to be the case, most likely.

But I'm sorry you've found the system so unhelpful! I really think a competent nutritionist should at least be a little understanding of mental health problems, especially when a lot of people coming to them with additional health needs will probably be coping with a lot and might need a little empathy. I mean, yeah, that's not her main job, but healthcare requires a multipronged approach, especially since her "just eat" directive won't be helpful without someone assisting with the mental health aspect simultaneously. I mean, if she frequently works with ED clients she should know that - "just eat" is such an ineffective directive. I hope you find a therapist or a team of therapists that are capable of helping you.

My advice, though? Break it down for yourself. All of these things are a cycle that feed into one another, so making progress in ANY of these areas you struggle in is still progress. And if you let yourself focus on one thing at once, it might not seem so overwhelming. Also remember that everyone struggles with hard days/moments, so if you slip, it doesn't mean you've lost all your progress. It seems an all-or-nothing approach can be really self-defeating. I get it, though - that's definitely something I still find myself struggling with!

I really hope you find more social support! I don't know if you have any online support groups. I also hope it's okay that I published this ask - I tend to do it unless otherwise specified so that people on here don't feel alone in their struggles. I bet there have been lots of ED sufferers who struggled during the pandemic, who have been feeling a lot of overwhelm and who struggle with finding adequate support and on trying to accept their bodies as-is and who are triggered by things like buying new clothes. I'm wondering if anyone else would like to share their experiences.

#weight mention #restriction cw #ask vent

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the-bjd-community-confess · 3 years

Text

More Divaz confos

Mod: Round two of these, previously: link. There’s some interesting customer reviews in this batch (5 and 8) which may be useful to readers.

1.Vic3mage "the secret bjdivaz vip group is just pictures of boxes coming in and going out". Yeah, between the bitching about d0llshe, asking people to post on doa for them, dunking on ex-customers, posting pics of random doll parts that they can't identify which doll they're supposed to go with, whining about how little money they make, whining when ppl e-mail them, whining. Yeah, other than that it's just boxes, and alpacas u can buy off amazon anyway lol.

~Anonymous

2.The butthurt users crying and guilttripping under every Divaz confession who have never been seen before elsewhere on this blog are extremely unsuspicious and unproblematic and definitely unconnected to Divaz and unbiased in every possible way

~Anonymous

3.idk shit abt bjd1vas but v1cemage i can absolutely tell you the shit about ch0o is 100% accurate, fucker's got a long, long history of being an awful little man that stretches well beyond his involvement in the doll community. between the two i'd still trust bjd1vas over ch00 ch00 the fool any day!

~Anonymous

4.The Z3st and Div4s thing is really silly and both entities were being shady but did they really have to take the DZ waiting room down with them? :( He had even made a separate thread about it......

~Anonymous

5. RE: BJD Divaz

I’ve been a customer of BJD Divaz since they first started, when it was only run by Chart3rline. I even contacted other BJD companies trying to persuade them to work with Divaz as their US representative. Most declined because they didnt like D's commission fee, but I was able to persuade a few of them.

I asked them to purchase a doll off DOA because I couldnt afford the asking price, and while they did, I found out later that instead of agreeing to purchase the seller's price, they negotiated the price to be lower. This significantly cheaper price was not passed down to me. I paid the full price +the commission fee based on that full price. I am disappointed I was not told this. This is when I stopped viewing them as a "friend" and instead, as a business. I dont hold this against them, it’s context to what Im going to say later.

I’ve stopped purchasing from D after my recent order from them. This company usually takes 3 or less months to make a doll. I’ve ordered the doll from D and it took 11 months. They let me know it arrived to them in March and that it will be shipped soon, except it only shipped on July, and only after I sent them several "reminder" emails. Before people in the comments try to put the blame on me for not sending a reminder soon, please keep in mind that I acknowledged the email in March and confirmed everything and they keep stressing to not send them emails because they are busy, I’ve emailed once every month since. I’ve since switched to ACBJD and Ive been happy with communication and the dolls ordered. I imagine ACBJD gets the same amount of emails, but they dont berate their customers if they email more than once.

I regret when people wanted a D0llshe, but not deal with him, I always recommended D. I would warn people of ordering directly and instead go through D. They assured buyers they would be handling communication and all the efforts so they wouldnt worry, except they didn’t. A person that I’ve recommended D to, who surpassed 2 years, keeps messaging me for help because D wouldnt reply to their emails. She is respectful, sweet and a timid person, not a Karen. This person, emailed D without a reply so would email a week later, only to be told that their email would be pushed down to the bottom if emailed again. No response, so she goes to FB and IG, who both tell her to email because they arent the person running orders. Finally got a response that they would get their refund, after D0llshe sends D's payment, but minus the PP fees. 3 months later and theres no refund, only a promise of them getting it later. Why is the customer missing out on fees when they have no doll? Customer emails d0llshe and he says he cant offer refund, because they didn’t order through them, which is understandable, but when all options are out for a customer, do you blame them for chargebacks?

If anyone files a chargeback, D will be blacklisting them from every company they rep, as in blacklisting you from buying direct from those companies. I urge everyone who has negative experiences with D to email the companies they rep instead of venting on confession blogs, and writing your experiences on social media. Make it count and send letters to the companies they represent, and please provide proof because they will try to make you out to be a liar.

Speaking of, they made vague posts on cl0ver singing for charging paypal fees, and that they offer guarantees as an official dealer, except when offering refunds, to non delivered products I might add, they are keeping the fees, and offered no help with d0llshe, even before they ended their dealership with them. Someone on DOA was told to not email them unless the wait time surpassed 1.5 years. They are even so petty that they post screenshots with the full name and address (dox) of the customer on purpose and then delete it out a day later as if they just realized their "mistake".

Before you try to make excuses for them about the fires, keep in mind, I am dealing with a business. The lower price negotiation with the DOA sale, I am in no way obligated to give them a pass or treat them as a friend when they made it clear that our relationship is strictly business. Their issues, are not my issues. D0lk got dragged for not shipping in time, others, including artisans, got dragged for being so late with communication and sending back refunds for cancelled orders. Why does D get to be exempt?

The supporters are the worst part of this, because of instead of being honest so D can improve, they support them for being "real". For example, look how micemage words it, to make it seem like this criticism is from one person, when there are people on addicts who didn’t have good experience. Check the bjd dealers tag here, you will see the supporters in the comments going off on any and all criticism of D. Some have sane comments, but the majority are cult like and try to identify the person venting as if it’s one person. Addicts deletes threads with criticism asking people to instead direct it to their feedback group; which lets be honest, no one is going to do because its "not that bad", and most dont want to join a new group, which is mostly dead.

This is my first and last confession on D, I’ve emailed each company they rep and told them my experience as well as contacting the 3 month wait company, with screenshots of my order, how they handled it, and the excuse they used to put blame on the company for being so late (package arrived march to D, 4 months to be shipped is on D, not the company). I’m not using company or order details because I know they are petty enough to try to identify me and publicly shame me like they have to others. This and the threat of suing is why not many people like to go public with their experience. They just keep feedback neutral, move on and never deal with again.

~Anonymous

6. Listen, I can't take you seriously in regards to BJD!vas because you're posting on a confession blog. If you were serious, you would have posted in buyer beware groups, DoA reviews or the board to get things resolved, or you would have made a complaint to the BBB. And your language makes you come off more as someone with an agenda rather than someone who is trying to warn people. If shipping is the issue, stop buying with standard shipping and pay the extra price for express shipping. I saw one of you complain that it sat with them for 20 days; that's probably because you're not the only one and they more than likely have a queue to check and then ship out. Do mistakes happen? Yes, because we're human. I've been in this hobby for a few years now and it seems like most people know you're going to have to wait, sometimes even outside the expected wait time. And shipping something as big as a doll is a timely endeavor. I shouldn't have to say that.

My point is simply to stop complaining on an confession board and either take it to the places previously mentioned. Posting here behind the anonymous mask makes you sound like a petulant child who didn't get their way right away.

~Anonymous

7.My only issue with BJD Divaz is how I never get any updates. Every email, they tell me to join their facebook page for status updates. I dont have a FB and I dont want to create one. I bought my doll through their website, updates should be posted on their website, or they could send me an email. That isnt asking much.

~Anonymous

8. Since there seems to be a lot of either "completely negative everything sucks" or "everything was sunshine and rainbows" confessions about bjd!vaz I thought I'd chime in with a neutral review.

PROS

-They were always polite and professional in their emails, and gave me very detailed answers to my questions.

-I got exactly what I ordered, so no mix ups or missing parts or anything like that.

-I think them being forthcoming about personal issues (only one person on staff, illness, the flooding isue etc.) on social media is good, since it keeps customers updated as to why there might be delays.

-If you live in the US their shipping is very reasonable.

CONS

-Reply times were varied. Sometimes it could take over a week, sometimes a couple hours.

-My order took about 10mo which, when comparing to other people who ordered through the same company around the same time, was about 3x as long as if I bought it direct and 2x as long if I had gone through a different dealer. I get some of the waiting time is out of their control, but it was kind of ridiculous.

-They dont necessarily ship the same day they send you a tracking number. I wish they said something like, "Here's your tracking number, our pickup is Xday so it should start moving after that" just so I could be aware.

All in all no major complaints. I got my doll and all that. Their lone employee is clearly overwhelmed. I hope they hire another person, if only to give the one a break.

Truthfully, I most likely won't buy through them again. I'd rather pay the international shipping and go direct, than deal with the extensive wait time. I'd still recommend them to someone looking for a very long layaway, though. I paid in full, but if I had a 12mo layaway I would've never known they weren't ready to ship my doll until month 10.

~Anonymous

#BJD #ABJD #BJD Confessions #TrueBJDConfessions #BJD Dealers

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angelthebedsheet · 4 years

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a/n: @tom-hlover i hope this was to your liking! it was a lil hard but i do love tom holland’s spidey so here it is! i just assumed that it was a romantic relationship too !!

lets get it!

——————————————————————————-

okay so first things first?

yall are ATTACHED at the hip

ned and mj clown peter for this all the fucking TIME

like he always walks you to class and sits next to you in class

peter we get it you want this melanin dial it back

and you are a superhero FIEND

anyone who knows you knows you go feral for superheroes and spiderman specifically

mj knows this, ned knows this, peter definitely knows this

mj always just gotta give peter a look like

whenever you start gushing about whatever spidey did that night

“peter did you see him last night?! he looked so amazing!”

“ah yeah n/n i saw!”

internal SCREAMING

like his beautiful amazing talented spectacular crush and best friend is fawning over him ???

mind boggling brothers

i mean your lockscreen is one of those press hold ones that move? so at first it’s a group picture of you, peter, mj and ned then you hold and boom its spidey swinging

peter found this out by accident and simply lost his mind in his room

you would do ANYTHING to see spidey in action and anYTHING TO HELP

bbg just wanna be a hero too 🤪

this day peter couldn’t come over to your house this time bc of his internship and had to leave early

aka code word for spidey shit to do lmao

and you’re a lil bummed

“but petey it’s wednesday and we were supposed watch mean girls and legally blonde.”

“i-i know i’m sorry n/n i’ll make it up to you”

mj and ned heard that and LOST IT

you frowned watching peter book it outta there like the lights were out

i mean my mans usain bolted it

mj and ned couldnt go home with you either so that sucked

you didnt usually walk home by yourself and honestly you really didn’t want to

it mf queens man. it’s not the safest place in the world

you started walking home and decided to buy some snacks n shit bc you saw them glazed donuts lookin real SCRUMPTIOUS AND FRESH in that packet

now you got the snacks secured in your bag and ready to go

you’re walking down the sidewalk when you hear some grunts and scrapping sounds?

you look down the alleyway and literally see your idol spiderman cornered

nuh uh not on your watch

you dropped your bookbag and tied ya braids/locks/afro back and took a running start

just as spidey was about to get punched you KICKED that mf straight in the cheek

spidey is like ????

“get got bitch!”

y/n???? awSHIT

its YOU

on one hand that was badass and two WHY ARE YOU HERE AND NOT HOME???

you grabbed a random pipe laying around and went ham on that bitch

peter is like confused and panicking as he stands up

you are handling your shit you aint need no mf powers

you got the black nasties on that was powerful enough

you are deadass yelling BITCH each time you hit them

peter snaps outta it and pulls you back

bc damn they knocked out alr you were bashing that hoe IN

you drop the pipe and turn to spidey with that big ol smile

peter felt his knees buckle

“you okay spidey? you looked like you needed some help?”

holy shit?

“u-uh t-thank you y–miss”

he had to speak from the belly with that

(i can hear my chorus teacher going SING FROM YOUR DIAPHRAGM)

while yall chatting it up another villain swooped in and threw some shit at yall?

idk how to describe it but it damn near almost impaled you but thankfully peter’s spidey sense kicked in and he pulled you out of the way

even though now you’re in fucking DANGER you’re losing your mind bc you are pressed up against peter’s chest

like damn spidey you really built like that?

peter on the other hand is like shit

cant let the loml aka crush slash bestfriend get hurt but i gotta fight these mfs....

he’s like fuck it man we gon dip just this once and picks you up

“hold onto me real quick?”

“o-oh okay????”

you’re living the fuckin DREAM and wrap your arms around his neck

peter’s trying to stay professional but ... girl you smell good asf and you basically intoxicating babyboy

then he just tHWIPS it outta there and hooks his foot onto your bookbag

shit was sexc even tho that didnt make much sense

yall SWINGING thru the streets with a lil funk and soul

you’re fully living the dream now baby!

he kinda just kicks his foot up and you catch your bookbag before wrapping your arms around his neck again

he swings yall onto a building roof top and you’re in awe

you’ve never seen queens like this before

he lets you go

“woah....”

“beautiful right? one of the benefits of being able to swing around”

“i know thats right...”

he’s just admiring you now

lil did we know tony stark PEEPED that shit thaNKS KAREN

you noticed spidey just staring at you and you lwk feel your cheeks heat up (bc black people don’t blush ❤️)

spidey you deadass left two CRIMINALS out in the open like hurry up

“h-hey can we take a picture together? i wanna show my petey that i met you!”

MY PETEY?????

“o-oh uh sure? also who’s.... who’s petey?”

“oh he’s my best friend! technically his name is peter but i love giving him nicknames.”

bitch oh???

you turned on your phone and show him your lockscreen pointing at peter

“isnt he just adorable?”

palms are sweaty knees weak arms are heavy

“ah. do you. do you like him?”

you kinda just unlock your phone while looking away

“y-yeah i mean who wouldn’t? he’s perfect... 👉🏽👈🏽”

PETER INTERNALLY WENT

bro HE’S ASCENDING

YOU LIKE HIM????

PETER PARKER???

HIMS???

THIS WHITE BOY FROM QUEENS?????

“you like peter?”

“yes.”

“peter parker?”

“yes?”

“oh thank god”

“i beg your pardon?”

PETER....

“oh i um i said that b-because i know him and im pretty sure he likes you back”

“oh???”

“y-yeah. he talks alot about you”

my mans are you really... snitching on yourself?

he really being his own wingman...

“really?”

“yup. i get it too. you’re. you’re beautiful.”

you went

😳

🕶🤏🏾

are my eyes deceiving me or is spiderman calling me BEAUTIFUL???

now yall both flustered

you’re thankful for your beautiful melaninated skin

peter’s thankful for that mf mask

“t-the picture”

“o-oh right”

cue tony PLOTTING like a mf

yall take two cute lil selfies together before spidey realizes he on the fuckin JOB

“ah i have to go let me take you home. where do you live?”

and you tell him your address even tho he already had it memorized by heart

he swang you to your doorstep and waved you goodnight before going back to handle those criminals

after that peter’s finally on his way home when tony pipes up

“was that the girl you always talk about”

“m-mr. stark??? you saw that??”

“all of it. she’s badass i want her on our team.”

“?!”

that night you got an email from tony stark and you RANG UP PETER SO QUICKLY TO LOSE YOUR SHIT ABT NOT ONLY TONY BUT SPIDEY TOO

“PETER OMFG BRO LOOOKKKKK I GOT AN EMAIL FROM TONY AND I ALSO MET SPIDERMAN TODAY. HAVE THE GODS FINALLY CHOSEN ME AS THEIR FAVORITE FOR TODAY????? JAJDJSJDNSKDNXN”

“t-that’s amazing n/n!”

the next day at school you absolutely GLOMPED him and mj

you are BUZZING with energy

mj’s kinda like?? did peter dick you down or some shit why you this hyped in the morning???

peter alr knows and is internally screaming into the void bc you like him back????

you’re already showing mj the pictures like “BRO LOOK HE EVEN HELD MY WAIST YESTERDAY!!”

ned is like 😏

mj is like 😌

they giving peter the LOOK

bc bro.... cmon now peter.

mj and ned dip leaving you to gush to peter alone

“do you think i can really be a hero petey?”

“d-definitely n/n i mean you did save spiderman yesterday”

“you’re right!”

peter has lost his shit too many times

“also petey. i like you alot.”

cheek kiss and dip

petey boy is stunned standing there in the halls like 😳

then he revives himself like ik this pretty bitch didnt just kiss and dip me like that

now he chasing you

alls good

mj and ned got blackmail too

#spiderman x reader #peter parker x reader #peter parker x black!reader #spiderman x black!reader #tom holland #tom holland’s spiderman #ned leeds #mj watson #x black reader #x female reader #spiderman headcanon

173 notes · View notes

spade-riddles · 3 years

Note

Sorry mate TTA but I'm gonna need more cuz it's easy & convenient for you to say all that AFTER the fact. Hell any one of us couldve sent in that ask. Perhaps ur legit but I still feel like ur just another hater making up stuff to make us look stupid.

Anonymous asked:

And we should care, why, Tea Time Anon? I'm not seeing any reason to continue supporting those two women or to put any faith into what you say.

Anonymous asked:

I really really really hope that that teatime anon isnt giving us false hopes. Like im already at the edge, one more step and im out. But right now im taking 2 steps back and hang around… again.

Anonymous asked:

Well! It's a REALLY good thing for the girls that buying out of contracts is a thing, then, isn't it!

Because them doing it ASAP is the ONLY thing that will make it so that the number of people that will support them as a out couple ISN'T so low that you can count them on one hand! 😒🚬

Anonymous asked:

Yeah sure like she moved the re-release of her most successful and most anticipated album ever *at the last minute* because of Karlie. As if she was ever gonna incorporate Karlie while married to a Kushner (the divorce wouldn't have come right away). I used to believe so much in tta. But the timeline of events they describe doesn't make sense. Am not falling for the "pivot" excuse anymore.

Anonymous asked:

“I think you all may have guessed that a PR divorce was planned and cancelled because of his Instagram deletion and subsequent reactivation.” No offense to you SR, but this sounds really manipulative. Make us feel good for something we indeed were assuming to gain our trust in order to then excuse their inconsistencies. Also even if 1989 were to be released on May, Speak Now was never gonna be released in July as they had said. Too short of a rollout for 1989. Explain that TeaTimeAnon. 🤷‍♀️

Anonymous asked:

Renegotiate!? Come on. Nope. Taylor better carry on, cause that is bullshit if true. Hell nah. Karlie is ridiculous to keep agreeing to shit—and Taylor is ridiculous to keep going along with it. Nope. Sorry. 😏

I do feel like something was coming in May for sure. I'm not sure what's going on, but things are for sure off. And it is weird that she all of a sudden announces RED 5 months early after dropping 1989 merch. Cool, no problem, but a weird rollout.

Anonymous asked:

Uh why does KK need money from jerk if she has Taylor? The whole she needs his money thing which is why she’s staying is getting to be an old excuse.

Anonymous asked:

There's no way the jerklie divorce was scheduled for the end of May. The end of the contract maybe. But there's absolutely no way they'd be getting divorced 3 months after the birth of the baby. It would have drawn too much unnecessary attention.

Anonymous asked:

Lmao tea time is just saying what we’ve all been saying. They are NOT legit. Stop trying to convince us that they are. They sound like regular fans taking a guess. Enough

Anonymous asked:

Sigh. I am a long time Kaylor and I really don’t find 🍵 credible. There was nothing in that explanation that we haven’t already speculated about at length on here. Unless there’s some strong corroboration of why they’re a trustworthy source, I really don’t need anymore “tea”.

Anonymous asked:

I mean come on. Would a real insider reveal so many details about Karlie's contract which is STILL ongoing in a place that is HEAVILY monitored by Jerk's team? Are we really that naive to believe that someone is offering such precious info without any care? TTA is either a troll or worse... they're dangling fake hope again right when everyone has started saying how sick and tired they are and how pointless it is to still support them. TTA must prove themselves, or not bother us ever again.

Anonymous asked:

Some of what TTA is saying makes sense... But here's my big question: Is Karlie sad and blue every day for months like Taylor talked about in Hoax? Or is she willingly prolonging her contract, pushing Taylor's re-recording schedule, and making it harder to untangle her and her kid from the K*shners? Both cannot be true. I'm not a big Karlie fan rn, but I think it's the first option. Also, TTA said 1989 TV would drop 5/14. So K renegotiated and T pushed 1989 in under 2 weeks? I'm skeptical.

Anonymous asked:

… so a “PR divorce” was scheduled for May, but instead we get Karlie w Joshua’s mom walking the baby and Karlie posing for pics in their stunt apt and a Father’s Day post? Among other pap walks? Literally makes NO sense.

Anonymous asked:

If anything is worth staying tied to the K*shners when you had a chance to be free, I have no respect left.

Anonymous asked:

can someone clarify what the 3rd part of tta's message?? taylors sm, interviews have been messy? like no?? that was(is) karlie?? the only "mess" on her part are that she sent out clues for multiple albums, and even that I refuse to believe that such a meticuluous planner as taylor did not take absolutely every factor in consideration, especially one as big as jerk renemwing their contract or whatever exactly went down. here im assuming that jerk had the power to single handedly renew [PART 1]

the contract, and that the term 're NEGOTIATE' is used loosely, because what could the kushners possibly have to offer to karlie other than money- black, dishonest, taxpayers' money- even her rep isnt being helped by the kushners, so why would she agree to extending their stupid skit that no one signed up for? and taylor has more than enough money to last 7 lifetimes. and if jerk had the power to renew the contract without karlies involvement, there is just no way that taylor didnt [PART 2/4]

take that into consideration. Also, the 22 weeks and men's day thing is too perfect to be planned on a whim, but it is possible that like some anon had previously said, it was planned for 2022, so we can overlook that. but otherwise, there are only so many possibilities: 1. 1989 was postponed because karlie DECIDED to continue playing house with the kushners for money. in which case, either a) taylor supported her (seems unlikely but still possible) or b) they broke up because of this [PART3/4]

2. karlie and jerk are together for real and have a kid together and karlie refused to being a part of 1989 tv era because she doesnt want kaylor rumours again, which i agree would be unpleasant if she really is with jerk, taylor is or is not with joe, and karlies refusal caused 1989 to pivot, and all of us kaylors are delusional to think there is anything more between them. <PART 4/5>,

3. karlie is, infact, bearding with jerk but kaylor broke up a while ago and taylor doesnt want to relive 1989 tv so soon after her breakup because it would remind her of karlie. 4. they broke up sometime in the past and taylor asked her now ex to be part of the 1989 tv era and she refused. 5. tta is a fraud. these are really the only situations i think are plausible, others are free to add more and share your thoughts on these. <PART 4/5>

also, another thing that has me doubting the credibility of tta is how direct their messages are. there is a chance that spade is/was legit because they spoke the same language as taylor- one of codes and puzzles. but tta's messages are wayy too straightforward to be approved by taylor i think. so either, as another anon requested, show some proof, like maybe a single release date for red tv or something, or stop sending supposed "tips" <PART 5/5>

Anonymous asked:

Convenient that TTA shows up after Red TV has been announced. Taylor has been dropping hints about all her albums since before May. Red tv being next makes sense and there is Easter eggs and evidence that was the case. Also: if negotiations happened at start of May, why was KK dropping 1989 hints as recent as last week. It’s doesn’t make sense.

Anonymous asked:

TTA: What about Speak Now TV coming out on July 9th, like you said last time? That album has nothing to do with Karlie. Taylor said pretty clearly that the next album she's releasing is Red TV. So what's your explanation for Speak Now's release being pushed to some unspecified date?

20 notes · View notes

simpsiren · 4 years

Text

to have and have not.

lee taeyong x reader

“losing me is better than losing you.” - losing you, wonho

main masterlist

description. being close friends with the leader of one of the biggest korean gangs in the underworld wasnt already tough, a big situation falls into your laps that only makes your bond with him even stronger, and maybe perhaps having love to bloom in the process.

genre. mafia au, fwb to lovers au,

warnings. none except for a lot of shooting cudndn

word count. 6,733

a/n. here's a taeyong x reader ff i came up with. its not much but i still hope youll enjoy it :D

lee taeyong. most people, or rather regular people would have a shiver sent down their spine if they heard this name, even if they didnt know how the man looked like. taeyong was, and still currently is very well known in the underworld, but above it as well. he's a well known gang leader amongst all the other gangs that work under one man, mr david chong. basically the mafia boss trumping above all gangs. the police have never been able to catch him, no matter how hard they tried. the policemen would either get shot and killed one by one due to his great ability of using a mere pistol, or would just be killed by taeyong's gang members before taeyong would even appear in their sight. all in all, lee taeyong was a scary man in many ways. not to you though. you found him interesting.

when you were caught hostage by one of the gangs along with one other women you didnt know, and you have the great lee taeyong to get you out of there and have you work under him for debt in a way, you did owe him a lot when a bullet was mere seconds awayfrom going through your brain. you found out that the women who know work under taeyong as well is named val. now, you didnt have much work to do honestly, you would be lounging around in the arcade basement most of the time. you were only told to do small tasks that wasnt that horrifying in any way.

"im dying of boredom!" you whined as you sat up from the very comfortable velvrt couch and faced yuta, who was off duty for tonight. "doesnt boss have anything he needs me to do? i wonder why he even took me in" you folded your arms and rolled your eyes as you let your body slouch and sink into couch. "no one is doing anything right now M. the boss is trying to plan something big from what i hear." yuta shrugged as he took a sip of his vodka. all the members in the gang call you either mal or m, it was a shortened version of your long second name malvisko and you liked being called mal. "yeah well fuck that. im gonna go sleep." you stood up from the couch and waved a small goodbye to yuta before exiting the arcade basement to head to your bedroom, or not.

you tip toed across the halls, making sure no one sees the fact that youre slowly making your way to the boss's office. you arrived at the door without being seem by anyone and right before you were about to open the door, you see jaehyun, taeyong’s right hand man. you looked up to meet his gaze. “you’re here to see mr lee?” you nodded slowly, intimidated by how cold he looks, but no one can beat the gaze of taeyong. “he’s currently feeling stress. try to calm him down a little.” he pats your shoulder before walking past you and disappearing into the hallway. the only person who knows your true relationship with taeyong was jaehyun, and you consider him to be a friend more than a colleague.

you stepped into the room and closed the door behind you. you see taeyong behind his desk with his laptop. he wore his wearing casual attire, which was a hoodie and sweatpants, along with his glasses. you see papers scattered across the table. you slowly walked up to stand beside taeyong. “hey, tae. how’s work going for you?” you placed your hand underneath taeyong’s chin and kisses his cheek lightly. taeyong sighed and took off his glasses and rubbed his temples. “almost all gangs are now working under bishop. what’s worse is that he’s working for that idiot david chong.”

you placed both your hands on his shoulders and massaged them gently as you bit your lip, not entirely sure of what to say. “that sounds pressurising.” you whispered. taeyong scoffed in response. “im going to take revenge on them for killing my brother. he wasnt even involved in this shitshow. ill figure something out.”

you knew about taeyong’s past. you knew that he has worked under mr david chong since he was little but decided rebel, leaving to start his own gang. but now, mr david chong wants him back and will do anything to do so. taeyong is a “precious specimen” as what mr david chong kept calling him. a man who was extremely smart and living in a monstrous world, he did everything he could to survive. it only made his instincts so much stronger. taeyong was like a wild beast in a wild forest, not many were able beat him. you felt honourable for the fact that taeyong lets you know his past. the other members know about it as well, but not as much as you did.

“rest tonight, tae. i want you to sleep.” you leaned forward from behind and whispered into his ear, gently planting light kisses down his neck. taeyong sighed once more and pulled your hand from your shoulder and turned his chair to face you. taeyong pulls you to sit on his lap. “now’s not the time to be doing stuff like that. im sure you know that well.” taeyong glares at you with his piercingly dangerous eyes. you giggled softly, resting your hands on his chest. "i was just advising you to rest, nothing more." you winked teasingly. taeyong scoffed in response and made you stand up. he walked past you and towards the bed, falling onto it almost instantly. you followed suit and sat beside him at the edge of the bed. "youre right. i have a ton of things to do tomorrow." taeyong covers his eyes with his forearm. "im having jaehyun guard you while im away too. its getting dangerous with a whole army of high ranked psychos coming for me. theyll definitely go for those i most treasure before capturing me."

you took a deep breath. "be careful alright? come back to me safe." taeyong chuckled, shaking his head as he sat up straight, going close to you and pecking your lips. "cant exactly do that without having either a bullet in me or a broken rib, but ill come back alive." taeyong wraps his arm around you and pulls you in for a quick kiss before pulling away. "now go. i dont want my men suspecting anything." you nodded and stood up and walked to the door. before you walked through the door, you went back to taeyong to give one last kiss before leaving him for the night.

you were walking down the dimly lit when you suddenly bumped into someone. you looked up to notice it was jeno. one of the younger guys in the gang. "what were you doing boss's office?" jeno asked innocently. you licked your lips nervously, trying to quickly think up an answer. "its fine. i know what you are to him." jeno folded his arms as he smirked widely in a teasing manner. you quickly looked around, making sure you and him were alone. "no one is to hear that you know. im just his friend.. with benefits." you whispered to jeno. jeno giggled. "sure mal. anything you say." he mocked you. "shut it. if taeyong knows that you know he'll probably threaten you to keeo quiet. its good enough that im already warning you." you rolled your eyes and before you were about to make a turn towards another hallway, you look at jeno's way and pressed your index finger to your lip.

you headed to your room and slept as perusual. lucky for you, nothing happened to you that night. taeyong is always scaring you by saying that anyone can kidnap you in the middle of the night, at any time. but god knows taeyong would never let that happen. when you wake up in your large bedroom in your large bed, you looked towards the coffee table to see jaehyun sitting on the comfortable chair, drinking coffee and using his phone. you signalled jaehyun by coughing, making him look your way immediately. "good morning, miss." you sat up from your bed and yawned, turning your head to the full body mirror beside your bed and seeing how terrible you looked. you slipped out of your soft white mattress and grabbed the silk robe, wearing it on before walking over to the coffee table.

“i told you. you didn’t have to call me miss. im your colleague for shit.” you said as you took a seat across jaehyun. he placed the cup of coffee he had in his hand on the table. “sorry, mal. im just used to calling you miss since you have a strong relationship with taeyong.” jaehyun doesn’t look up at you as he quickly glanced his eyes over the words on the newspaper. “jeez im telling you. we’re just friends with benefit. nothing more.” you huffed and folded your arms, slouching into the seat. “by the way, apparently jeno knows about me and taeyong. just keep an eye on him.” you grabbed the cup of tea that was on the table and took a sip. “the gang will be in an uproar if word gets around” you whispered, staring down at your drink. “i will.” jaehyun simply said.

you carried on with your day. most of the gang members are out today. probably because of the big plan that taeyong is doing. he probably also has some gang members to follow him. jaehyun would be with taeyong most of the time but he needed to take care of you since taeyong trusts him with you the most. you could understand. they had a long history together.

“can we please go grocery shopping and cook homemade food? im tired of buying take out.” you whined as you stabbed the fork into the friend chicken that you ordered from kfc. jaehyun took a sip of coca cola and hummed. “im not sure if its safe mal. taeyong wouldn’t want you to be wondering around in public.” you pursed your lips. “but i have you to protect me.” you pouted at jaehyun. he raised his eyebrow in disgust and sighed. “ill call taeyong and ask him.” you shouted a loud yay which made jaehyun flinch back, using his finger to cover his ear as he rolled his eyes and took out his phone to call taeyong. you were trying to hear his conversation with taeyong at the other end of the line by placing your ear close to jaehyun’s phone. you smiled as jaehyun ended the call. “alright. get ready to go. ill wait outside the room.”

you nodded happily as closed the door when jaehyun walked out, skipping your way towards your wardrobe and picking out a simple outfit to go to the supermarket. you made sure you hair looked neat and grabbed your purse and walked out to meet jaehyun. jaehyun leads you out of the hideout and gestured you to get into the car. taeyong normally rode this car but for some reason he chose to take another one to run his errands. you waited as jaehyun gets into the driver’s seat and starts driving to the nearest supermarket.

you two arrived at the supermarket. you realised that it wasnt at all crowded since it was practically 3am in the morning. you only see a few high school students around buying a snack and headed out in a flash. jaehyun helped with pushing the trolley while you picked out ingredients to make jjajangmyeon. you figured that it would be best to make a big batch so that the rest could be saved as leftovers for the other members when they come back in the morning for breakfast. jaehyun kindly offered to pay and the both of you headed out of the supermarket, with jaehyun carrying the groceries.

“thanks for taking me out. its nice to take in some fresh air instead of being couped up in the hideout." you turned towards jaehyun to give him a bright smile but later noticed that jaehyun was looking around suspiciously, his eyes scanning around his surroundings as if the scanner in his mind has detected danger somewhere near you two. you kept quiet for moment, getting scared and you slowly got close to jaehyun. "get down!" jaehyun screamed at you, dropping the groceries and he wrapped his arm around you and drags you to hide behind the car when suddenly a bullet was fired to your direction. you froze, tilting your head up to see jaehyun quickly pulling out his gun from his back pocket, arms streched out to the ground, ready to shoot any second. "its a fucking sniper." jaehyun whispered to you as he looked up towards the buuildings oposite the car, trying to find which building the sniper was stationed at. you didnt know what to do, you were afraid, scared, many feelings were flowing through you. all you could do was look down at the ground, and trust jaehyun with whatever he was doing.

"we're going to get in the car and im going to drive us out of here before the sniper can take another hit, got it? just get into the car as quick as possible and duck down. make sure that he wont be able to see you through the window." you nodded as you quickly processed jaehyun's instructions. "on my signal." jaehyun had his eyes glued on the tall buildings, it was late at night so you could barely see anything, you could never imagine how jaehyun was even able to spot the sniper.

"now!" you immdiately opened the door and got inside the car, closing the door and ducking your body down so as to not be see through the winodw. jaehyun hopped into the driver's seat in a flash and started up the car. you were panting nervously as you felt the car moving at high speed. you heard another bullet being shot at the back of the car. you whinced as you tilted your head up to see jaehyun with his phone beside him, his phone being placed on speaker mode as he called taeyong. "something happened. a sniper tried to shot mal. im heading back to the hideout now." jaehyun said. you heard taeyong shouting a loud 'fuck' before hanging up the call. jaehyun kept silent as he drove you back to the hideout in full speed. in less than 10 minutes, the car was put to a stop. you hugged your purse and you started slowly sitting back up. you looked at jaehyun, who's head and eyes were scanning the area again. jaehyun got out the car and walked to your door, opening it and signaled you to get out, you continues hugging you purse to your chest tightly as you quickly ran towards the hideout and got inside, with jaehyun following you behind.

you took deep breaths and watched jaehyun you looked extremely wary yet calm and collected. you were almost killed and jaehyun looked chill, although you doubt he felt like it. "taeyong's coming. wait for him in the main area." you folowed his instructions and took a seat in the couch of the main area, which basically consisted of a single couch and a very large table. the main area is where everyone would gather if they needed to plan something together, like breaking into a house and sorting out the escape routes etc. you werent part of those meetings but you were always there at the doorframe to see what taeyong and the others were talking about.

you took out your phone, not seeing any messages. you sighed and shoved your phone bac into your purse. it didnt take long for taeyong to come rushing through the door and placing himself on the couch, sitting down beside you and hugging you tightly. you nervously placed your arms around him, seeing the other members aloqly coming into the room. you let out a soft 'uh' into taeyong's ear, signalling taeyong to pull away from you since there were many eyes on you, wierded out that taeyong is being way too touchy with a gang member.

taeyong immediately noticed you hint and pulled away, coughing as he walked toward the huge table and slammed bot his arms down. "bishop is coming, in no time, theyll find out about our hideout and attack." the gang members begin to gather around the table. jaehyun however was standing with his arms folded behind the couch. "splint into groups and disperse. we cant be gathering in big groups like this. leaders take charge." you see the leaders of the sub groups, which were taeil, winwin and johnny nodding their heads to their boss. "those under me. stay low. dont do anything reckless. although it applies to everyone so." taeyong shrugged and sighed, rubbing his temples. "okay thats all. everyone head out tomorrow morning. im calling the leaders in the future to give further orders."

everyone said their goodbyes and exited the room one by one. jaehyu was the last one to stand at the door and before heading out, he gave a look to taeyong, which taeyong responded with a nod and walked out, closing the door behind hi and leaving you and taeyong alone in the main area. taeyong turned towards you and took a seat beside you, looking at you up and down. "im so glad youre safe." taeyog brings his hand uo to cup your cheek and frowned slightly and hugged him tight, digging your face into his chest. taeyong held you close and strokes your hair slowly and placed a kiss on the top of your head. "im not gonna let you go out without me or jaehyun anyore. i cnt imagine what woud happen if you went out alone." taeyong whispered as he pulled away, looking at your face before pulling you into a deep kiss. he pulled himself away from you. "you must be shock from that. im letting you sleep in my room."

you nodded slowly and stood up, following taeyong out of the main area and to his bedroom, which is basically his office. he lets you go inside first and closed the door behind him. he immediately unbottoned his white button up shirt, taking it off and throwing it at the edge of the bed and took a seat on the bed. "why are you so dressed up? you only went to the supermarket." taeyong commented as his eyes scanned you up and down, your outfit looking too bold for going somewhere simple in the middle of the night. "its not often i get to go out of this place. i just wanted to look good." yoy stripped your clothes off till you were in your bra and underwear. you placed your clothes where taeyong's shirt was and picked up his shirt to put it on. "you look nice in my shirt."

you giggled you walked over to the bed and layed down beside taeyong. taeyong cuddled you close, your leg over his and you burry your head deep into his neck. "im going to keep you safe from now on." teyong said, planting kisses on your shoulder. "thats not what a 'friend' says you know." taeyong lets out a 'tsk' before closing his eyes. "sleep," taeyong muttered. you smiled softly and kissed his cheek one last time before falling asleep. to be honest, you didnt know what was yor relationship with taeyong. for now, you only wanted to think of taeyong as your friend with benefit. besides, how can a gang keader even have time to fall in love. you were only there to comfort him, seeing his soft side. you felt that his actions says more than what your relationship with him is, but you chose to not let you imagination wonder too far. you liked taeyong, but you never wanted to interfere with his work by having a relationship with him, thinking that you would be a burden.

the next morning you woke up to see taeyong who just got out of the shower. you yawned and sat up straight, waiting taeyong who’s abs were out in the open, immediately diverting your eyes to it. “you’ve seen it plenty of times but you’re always staring at it like its your first time.” taeyong said calmly. you blinked your eyes and gaze your eyes up at taeyong who was drying his hair with a small towel. you blushed and stood up from the bed. “i cant help it.” you shrugged and begin to unbutton taeyong’s shirt which you slept in and slipped into your own clothes. before you walked out to head to your own room, taeyong pulls you to him by the waist in a swiftly motion and planted a kiss on your lips. “shower and get ready by 9 at the main area. im having a meeting which you need to be there for.” you smiled soft and interlocked your hands with his before letting go and heading out to your room.

you quickly showered and changed your outfit into a more comfortable one, merely only wearing a hoodie and sweatpants. you shoved your phone into your back pocket and and shoved your hands into the sides of your hoodie and walked your way over to the main room.

when you arrived, you see the members that are grouped to be under taeyong standing around. you noticed that taeyong has yet to arrive. you see jeno hanging around the corner with jaemin. you headed over to them, since they’re the only ones you would consider close to. “mal! how was last night? did you have fun?” jeno asked, tilting his head and grinning widely with the smile of a cheshire cat. you furrowed your eyebrows and slapped his should, making him flinch back as he let out a hiss. jaemin looked at the both of you, confused. “what happened last night?” jaemin questioned you. you shook your head with a smile. “oh its nothing. i just played cod with mark last night.” you glared at jeno who still had his smile on. you rolled your eyes and folded your arms. just how does he know everything? you thought to yourself.

you heard the door open, revealing taeyong in a ravishingly beautiful slick black suit. you clicked your tongue in amusement as you eyed him. what’s the occasion for him to be dressing this good? “great everyone’s here. let’s walk through what’s going to happen tonight.” tonight? what is taeyong going to do? is this what he worked long hours for? you listened attentively as taeyong talked about the plan to the members. you were in awe. you weren’t mentioned in the whole plan at all. why did you have to be here? “this needs to be pulled off properly if we’re going to beat that shit. got it? mal, i just need you to stay with me.” taeyong said as he turned his head to the back to face you. you widened your eyes and nodded quickly. “we head out at 12am sharp.” with that, taeyong walked out of the room, leaving everyone to do their own things.

jaemin chuckled. “this is going to be fun.” jaemin said in a sing-song tone. “the fuck is so good about killing a bunch of people jaemin?” you took your phone out to check the time, realising that they had the meeting for four hours and its already 1 in the afternoon. “its the chaos that excites me.” jaemin winked at you, laughing sinisterly and shoved his hands in his trousers and walked out with his shoulders laid back. “he’s only being sadistic. its fine.” you looked at him with a weirded out face. he snorts and jerked your arm with his elbow. “chill m. he’s just joking with you.” members slowly started going out of the main area. you decided to hang out at the arcade area.

the whole day went by quick since you were on your phone the entire time and once it was beginning to get close to 12am. the place started to get hectic with everyone preparing their guns and maing sure they have everything ready before moving out. you however, were just waiting in the main area. you figured that everyone would gather there first so you decided to get your lazy ass out of the arcade room and to the main area.

one by one, members started coming in. you see everyone, including jeno and jaemin with a pistol in hand. you have handled those before but your aiming really sucked. no one in the gang can compare to taeyong's gun skills though. his precision is so good he can shoot someone right in the center of their forehead from such long distances. he liked using old fashioned guns that were different from what the others had since he was more comfortable with it.

by 12am sharp as promised, everyone has gathered in the main area.taeyong gave one last look to all the members and everyone nodded their heads and exited the room swiftly, leaving you, taeyong and jaehyun.

"jaehyun's going to drive us to the mansion. after that, im not letting you out of my sight. got it?" you hummed in response as the three of you proceeded as planned, getting in the car immediately after getting out of the hideout and headed to david chong's mansion.

when you arrived, the car was right in front of the entrance of the mansion. you look through the window andnoticed how extravagant it looked. it looked rich, like it costed millions of dollars, but that is what to be expected from a mafia boss who has money rolling in every second. taeyong asked you to stay put in the car while jaehyun and taeyong got out of the car to talk to the two security guards that were standing at two sides of the entrance and heavily armed with multiple guns strapped on their black vests. taeyong and jaehyun were being checked by the two security guards to avoid having any guns being pointed at david chong, well that made sense.

not long after, jaehyun opened the door of the car and taeyong stood in front of you before grabbing you by the arm and getting you out. you were being pulled to the entrance. the security guards immediately scanning you up and down. "the fuck you looking at my girlfriend for? she's unarmed dont worry." taeyong hissed at them, making them click their tongues and allowing you and teyong to enter, along with jaehyun following behind. did taeyong called you his girlfriend? well that was unexpected.

upon entry, you see a huge grand room which two large sets of stairs on either side, leading and connected together to the second floor, to which a old men stepped out of the shadows of the dimly lit room. "lee taeyong. been awhile since ive seen you in the mansion." taeyong only kept silent, his seemingly cold blooded gaze on david chong. right now, taeyong looked extremely intimidating. although you werent scared by him the first time you met him, this was different. it felt as thoug even his gaze can kill soeone out of fear.

"come back home, taeyong. ill take you under my wing again, and youll live the finest life ever." david chong said. you observed him closely. you thought he looked like those males that become more ugly the more they age. "like hell i would." taeyong said. suddenly, david chong's eyes turned to you. you widened your eyes in fear, but tried to look calm and collected. "who is this beautiful and precious young lady?" he tilted his head and the smiled widly. you were disgusted by the old man was eyeing you right now. taeyong puts a hand on your shoulder. "you remember her right? the girl that your snipers tried to get." the old man started to climb down the stairs. taeyong watching his every step. david chong eventually ended up standing in front of you.

"looking up close, she's more pretty than i thought. could be of use to me." the old man come up close to you, way too close. he placed his thumb on your chin, tilting your head up and he examined your face. your eyes went to taeyong, who instantly pulled you away from him, making you stand behind him. "dont fucking touch her." the old man responded with a loud chuckle. "protective as always. i really did raise you up well." david chong kept his eyes on you. you could tell that taeyong would have ripped his neck open by now, but he kept calm regardless of the overflowing rage at how close david was getting to you.

"how about this? lets arrange a deal." david said, folding his arms in front of him as he stood a foot away from taeyong, who only stared at him fiercely. "i have the girl, and you get your freedom." you widened your eyes, gaze immediately switching from david to taeyong, constantly going back and forth. you felt jaehyun's presense from behind coming closer. "so i dont need your ugly ass and your men tailing my every move if i let her be one your your billions of prostitutes." taeyong raised and eyebrow and laughed histerically, making him look the only crazy one in the room. his eyes grew dark soon after. "try that and you wont see the light of day. though i think today is the last time you ever will." taeyong's eyes glanced to the side where it was dark and in a split second, a gun slided on the floor from the darkness and was in taeyong's arm. immediately, all the members got out from lurking in the darkness, guns all pointed towards david. however, david's men, including bishop's group, appeared on the second floor.

you looked around you in shock, overwhelmed by how much has happened in the blink of an eye. you moved back slightly, feeling jaehyun's hand on your back which made you feel a little safe. you see taeyong pointing his gun towards david's head, to which david responded with a low chuckle. "what, you want to kill me? i have many gangs under me. i could get you devoured in a second." you hear jaehyun letting out a huff as a gun was tossed to him as well. "im not that dumb please."

taeyong wraped his arm around david's neck and turned around to face biship's gang at the second floor. "move and he dies." taeyong shouted, tightening his grip on david's neck. you could tell that bishop's gang members were irritated and taken aback by what taeyong did. taeyong gestured his head towards winwin, who the signalled his gang to go up to the second floor.

"drop your guns." winwin said to the group of men. they were about to put their guns on the floor when a bullet was fired at winwin's shoulder, who immediately whinced in pain. the whole room became a chaos as bishop's gang started to attack. you froze in fear. taeyong shot david in the leg and turned around to look at you. without realising, you see jaehyun on the floor with bishop's members surrounding him. one of the men grabbed you and placed your hands behind your back, tightening his grip. you stared at taeyong with widened eyes, too scared to do anything. you tried to get away from the man's grasp, but clrly you werent strong enough to go against him. you see someone coming up from behind taeyong. "taeyong behind you!" it was too late. taeyong was knocked down unconscious. "taeyong!" you cried out, trying you best to get to taeyong, but you couldnt. you cried as you saw taeyong's body fell to the ground. you realised jaehyun was unconscious as well. it didnt take long for them to knock you out soon after realising the situation you were in.

your eyes fluttered open. you tried to move but realised you were tied up with your hands behind your back and your legs tied together as well. you looked around, trying to process where you were at. it looked like a basement of some sort. the walls looked old and moldt and there was nothing else around you other than taeyong and jaehyun. you started wondering where your other members were at. you wiggled your way towards taeyong who's body was still and wasnt that far away from you. you tried to wake him up by bumping your head on his chest. it didnt take him long to wake up. "mal. fuck they caught us." taeyong muttered under breath as he woke jaehyun up by kicking jaehyun's leg. jaehyun looked around. you saw jaehyun's ear twitch suddenly. he leaned towards the door. "they're coming." jaehyun said. the room fell silent as the door flew open, revealing david alone, walking in. "look at you. i thought you were stronger than this taeyong." david bent down to meet taeyong's eye level. taeyong turned his head away.

"so whats it going to be? the girl, or you?" david walked over to you and grabbed you by the collar and lifted you up, his head getting close to your neck and he took in your scent. you bite your lip and tilted your head away, struggling to kick him away. "smells like money to me." david chuckled. taeyong and jaehyun both hissed at him like snakes. david acted scared, letting out a "woah." sarcastically. "you got one hour to decide. also.." bishop suddenly appeared at the entrance of the door and walked over to taeyong. "pleasure seeing you again." bishop said to taeyong. "to think you would be dumb enough to team up with david. go to hell." taeyong argued. "i thinnk youre the one going to hell, when i torture you to death." bihsop instantly pulls out a night and placed it at taeyong's neck. jaehyun tried to kick it away but to no avail. "im having him torture you while you decide. have fun." with that, david dropped you back to the ground, and left the room. you heard him lock it, just great.

"now, what are we going to do with you three?" bishop romved the knife from taeyong's neck and circled around the three of you. "all we wanted to do was take david's money and bring him to the police for fuck sake." taeyong said as he rolled his eyes. "you shouldnt let me know your plan, idiot." bishop commented when he stopped behind you, pulling your hair, making you whince. "tell me, you ever had sex before?" your raised an eyebrow and kept your mouth shut. "not going to reply i see." out of nowhere, bishop connected his lips with yours and tried kissing you, but you didnt let him, still struggling to get out of his grasp. "get away from her!" taeyong shouted as jaehyun kicked bishop in the stomach with his legs. you fell down and coughed in disgust. bishop laughed, standing up and squat down infront of you. you spit in his face and stared him in the eyes. "fiesty. i see why david could have fun with her." bishop whispered. the only thing you could think about was how furious taeyong looked, his eyes burning in anger.

"well, i didnt come here to torture taeyong so, ill be on my way now." bishop suddenly carried you bridal style. you screamed taeyong and jaehyun's names as you were being carried way from them and out of the room. taeyong looked into your eyes, nodding his head as to signal that you will be fine, and that he'll find a way to get to you. you could only trust him when the door closed, removing taeyong and jaehyun out of your sight.

you didnt know where you being being carried to. you tried to stay calm, but your breathing was completely unstable. bishop noticed how you were acting. "calm down, im only keeping you for myself, i only worked with david to get my hands on you." bishop opened a door and entered the room. it was a bedroom, a good looking one at that, fitting the theme of the whole mansion. "what are you going to do with me?" you asked him, your voice cracking. bishop throws you on the bed and gets on top of you, you shivered as his hand touched your cheek, admirj g your face. "you'll find out soon, love." with that, bishop gets off the bed and walked out the room and locked you in. you looked around, trying to find any possible way to escape. there wasnt a window to escape through and you were unable to come uo with any ideas. you cried as you hugged yourself on the bed, you didnt know what to do. you were away from taeyong. who knows what could happen to you. you cried and cried till your eyes became dry and extemely red.

bishop hasnt come back for awhile now. you closed your eyes and tried to control your breathing, taking in deep breathes to try and calm yourself down, though it was very difficult. you didnt realise you were crying too much to the point where you fell asleep.

you woke up. you werent in the room this time. you looked around, you looked to be in a car. you turned to the front to see jaehyun and taeyong in the front seats, with taeyong driving. "great youre awake. we're heading home, not the hideout though." taeyong said with a monotoned voice. how did you get out? did you fell unconscious or something? you were in bishop's room the last time you were awake. you fell asleep again, too tired to think or even bother to ask yourself questions.

soon, you felt arms carrying you out the car. you fluttered your eyes open to meet taeyong's. he placed a soft kiss at the top fo your head. taeyong carried you to a rundown looking house. the wood on the walls were filled with mold, but it appeared to still be a suitabe place for a hideout. you were placed on a bed and taeyong sat down beside you. he hugged you tightly, and you hugged him back, fully embracing his presence. he plants soft kisses on your neck. you pulled yourself closer to him. "is everyone safe?" you asked with eyes of concern.taeying pulled away from you and smiled softly. "everyone is fine, a few wounded but the doctors are handling that." taeyong pulled you in your a kiss. you wrapped your arms around his neck, while his was placed securedly on your waist. taeyong pulled away and sighed. "im sorry i couldnt protect you." taeyong whispered as he grabbed your hands and places them both on your lap, rubbing your skin lightly with his thumb. you layed a kiss on the side of his lips. "its fine, i was scared, but i knew you would come for me." you smiled softly, trying not to break down again in front of taeyong to make him feel worse.

"i love you." taeyong said. you widened your eyes. "you do?" taeyong hummed and nodded his head in response. you placed your forehead against his. "so we arent friends with benefits?" you asked him again. taeyong gave you wierded out look. "since when were we friends with benefits. i thought you knew that i liked you." you chuckled softly. "you should know youre the kind of person that cant express his feelings well." you commented. taeyong only frowned, to which to kissed it away. "ill keep you safe from now on, no matter what. losing me is better than losing you." taeyong hugged you once again.

after that crazy experience you had, you learned a few things. one, that taeyong was now yours. you didnt have to hide your feelings for him, and the members were apparently happy for you two. well, taeyong would propably rage if anyone opposed it anyways. and two, that you were able to trust taeyong full heartedly. with his strength, you know that he would do anything to keep you safe.

#nct #nct 127 #nct 2020 #nct taeyong #taeyong x reader #nct scenarios #nct imagine #nct x reader #nct ff #nct au #lee taeyong #taeyong #taeyong ff #nct taeyong x reader #lee taeyong x reader

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skinnyghosttears · 3 years

Text

April 22, 2021

8:02 am

Im going out for a walk with the dogs so I'll wait to come back home for weight myself. When I went to dinner yesterday I started to have really bad hungry pain and I was like "lmao you deseeve it for the mess you did" but fr I was happy because this means that even if I ate more that how I planned my body needed more.

As I said I dont answer in the replies under my posts because this is jot my primary blog, but thanks for who spent kind words for me 💗 and for who ask what exercise I do I mainly spend hours on a cyclette my father bought somme years ago, Im 25 and Im jobless rn so I dont have school and I spend entire hours on that thing.

Today should be a good day, I will eat an omelette with protein cheese and some salmon for lunch, me and mom will try to do strawberry ice scream with strawberries and some yogurt, and for dinner I have a soup that should be delicious. If the number on the scale will be fine I will maybe eat a biscuit eith coffee after lunch but who knows.

10:00 am

The number is the same as yesterday and Im so disgusted. Im taking a little break from exercising but holy shit, I will do it exactly as I said. Im honestly exited to go for a walk today, I hope to have enough energy for do it.

Im honestly thinkjg this weight I gained back its just water since I dont really drink enough, and Its really strange that because I ate a little more at dinner (still in deficit) I took back almost 1kg. Wathever, I'll still do the cheat day on saturday because even if I feel the nees to cry when I think about it I know its important.

Oh I forgot to say that I tried the white monster and I love it! So I'll buy it again and use it during the day when I want to binge.

11:22 am

Burned 1000kcal, the scale still said 60,4kg but now im gonna prepare a tea or something.

4:46 pm

I went out for the walk, and then I did ice cream with mom when I came back (only strawberries and yogurt and sweetener, it was delicious and healthy, not too many calories so it will become a safe food this summer). Later mom will exercise too so I will do it again probably lmaooo.

I also sent a voice message to my bff explaining her my problem, it was not that bad back in february so she didnt noticed last time we met.

5:27 pm

Nevermind I feel so full because of that ice cream, I want to cry and mom is not helping, fuck...

9:30 pm

Burned a total of 2000kcal, eaten 782, idk where I found the energy for do all of this but tomorrow I will not exercise, just bring the dogs out for a walk.

My mood is still not the best but Im happy I found a healthy, low cal and delicious thing for the summer. Watch me replace entire meals with just that, omg what a dream.

#ana #proana #thinspiration #thinspo #thin #skinny #ed #tw eating mention #eating diary #eating disorder #eating problems #cw disordered eating

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queenieloveswriting · 4 years

Text

Little orange bottles

A/N unedited little thing from a while ago, found loads of bits in my notes on my phone read this and though id post it let me know your thoughts ////hella old ngl sounds like shit srry ladsssss xoxoxoxoxooxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxTW--Abuse//Blood//Bad thoughs ig sorry not good w warnings sorry if this triggers anhyone

*beep beep beep*

Your alarm rang through the room for what seemed to be the fifth time this morning.It was now 6:30am and school began in two hours unlike the majority of students in kildare county you enjoyed school and, your (only) friend pope definitely made it worthwile.You both loved school,people like his friends jj and John b didn’t like school.

Why are you awake at 6:30 again?....right!

You look over to yourself in your mirror and glance at your schedule sticky taped to the corner;

*DAISYS SCHEDULE*

6:30-wake up

6:45-shower

7:00-get ready

7:20-read

7:50-breakfast/pillz

8:00-head to Heywards

Obeying the list, you hopped into the shower and got yourself prepared for the day, brushing your teeth washing your face and applying a light amount of makeup. A tinted moisturiser, clear mascara and brow gel, In attempt to tame your wild hair you collected into a cute messy ponytail, breaking three hair bands in the possess. Putting your glasses on you choose your outfit, due to the heat you opted for something casual, a blue denim skirt with a black crop top and a oversized blue flannel top covering just to the bottom of you skirt

You went downstairs and packed some fruit into your bag. Opting to take your breakfast as today's lunch, knowing Mrs. Heyward would invite you in for ‘leftovers’ from their breakfast. Shouting goodbye to your mum who was no doubt still in bed exhausted from her night shift.

Running out the door grabbing your phone, headphones and favourite book ‘to kill a mockingbird’. I plugged in my headphones playing my ‘reading playlist’ and read as i walked up to heywards,occasionally looking up so I don’t walk into any unwanted attention. The third time checking your surroundings you realise you made it to popes in record time, because his mom came out ushering you and him in in for ‘leftovers’ .Pope rolled his eyes sending you a silent apology. You didn’t mind though she was more a mother to you than your actual blood.

“Hey nerd "pope greeted you pushing your glasses up your nose

“Hey geek” you replied, slapping his hands away, he pulled you into a quick hug and followed h8im and his mum into the kitchen.

“Whatcha reading this time?”he asked making you laugh slightly “Harper lee my friend” you replied holding up your book as he rolled his eyes “why am I not surprised ,you know the book doesn't change right every time you read it "he asked playfully “I know pope, but it’s a classic and i don’t have enough to get a new book until my shift next week so I’m not complaining “you sassed

“Yeah you're know that I’ve said you can borrow my books anytime “he asked

“Yeah but you won’t let me write notes in the margins pope! "you explained “because what about MY notes “he exclaimed and you both erupted into laughter.God,you're such geeks you mentally sighed.Mrs.Heyward scolded at us both for arguing and gave us some pancakes and fruit.

Mr.Heward barged through the doors shouting about some ‘arrogant snotty kook man’ and turned around shily when he heard you and pope laughing. "daisy hey sweetheart you need me to save you or you alright?” he asked, referring to his wife’s overwhelming mothering. You shook your head quietly declining his offer, smiling you replied “no sir it's fine, "you laughed "Heyward you need any help with deliveries?” you asked hopeful as you needed to buy some things for school. Being a pogue you tended to have to fend yourself, plus it gave you something to do. “Sure do doll, tomorrow morning,7 sharp you’n’my boy can help out and pope make sure you ask that Maybank if he's helping out too, need to know who goes so y'all come back alive”he joked”thank you sir”you shouted as he was halfway out the door.Turning back round to pope “maybank?” you asked, raising your eyebrow hinting you had absolutely no idea who he was talking about,”my friend jj you know the blonde who gets into all the fights i told you about”he answered and you nodded,still searching for an answer ”he's coming tomorrow?” you quizzed “yeah probably,plus i think it's about time you met my friends they all think i made you up”he laughed”c'mon we've gotta eat then go”

As if on queue Mrs Heyward shouted at you from across the hall telling you to eat before it got cold.After scoffing your breakfast down,it was time to leave.After regular smothering from your second mother you left.

“Sorry about them”he mumbled

“It’s fine it’s nice having the whole parents as parents thing you know”you said .Pope knew about your mom not being around or well really a mom.He said you could come round whenever assuring his parents you were just friends,they loved you.

He nodded”you know your welcome whenever”he said and you nodded again

“Yeah but anyways how you feeling today about mrs.spiky hairs test smartass”you joked “we gon ace it y'all ready know her tests are easy”he dragged

“True I’ve got all a’s every time”you smirked

“Yeah same but to be fair even my friend John b could pass them and he didn't know that there were two different there’s until junior year so....”

You laughed “wait I though that jj was the the dumb one”you asked “there both delinquents but gotta love em.I’m brains of the operation anyways it’s my thang ”he sang causing you to laugh at the way he pinched his shirt and pingged it brushing dirt of his shoulders “you should come to the party tonight and meet them if you want?”he asked and you shook your head “i dont know pope,party’s and me aren’t really a good thing you know how my anxiety gets in groups”you said and he nodded “i know it’s fine don’t worry about it but offers there when you want you could even come out just us on the pouge if you wanted “he offered “they really wanna meet me?”you asked “well they wanna meet MY competition “he challenged “not really a competition there bud” you teased patting his shoulder “but I’ll think about it yeah?”you offered “sounds good and here we are” you turned facing each other then back at the school making your way inside.

“Hey i told jj I’d meet with him just before first lesson give him his homework see you there”you gave him a confused look “they go here?”he laughed “yeah didn’t i tell you”you shook your head no “sorry see you in 10 nerd”he waved “in 10 geek”you repli,ex

Waiting for class to start,you set up outside your classroom and put your headphones back in continuing your book. The vibration of the bell and stampedes of teenagers scurry to their first lesson , you ended up waiting for pope who practically ran down the hall and laughed when your eyes met.

You went in taking your seats next to each other this happened up until break. then lunch you’d go to all your lessons together hang out at break,being antisocial in the library, but at lunch he’s always go off,with the pogues you assume,now knowing they go to your school.At lunch you go outside and walk to the bleachers and sit reading basking in the sun.

After your last lesson with pope you both headed home together dropping him off at heywards halfway.

“Mom I’m home”you shouted slamming the door dropping the keys on the sideboard .After no reply you expected her to be at work so you got started on your homework so you could”relax” on the weekend.

It was now 6:30,and pope texted you telling you the party started at seven and the offer was still up before you could reply,you heard your door slam shut and you ran downstairs hoping you could talk to your mum,and catch up.

You see her figure reach for a cupboard that hasn’t been opened in years left. this was bad.

“Hey mama how was work”you asked with a shaky breath

She glared swigging the bottle

“You know what sweetie “she spat “Mama don’t have to go to work an more you wanna know why because i got fired from work apparently they couldn’t handle me anymore,took to many people on,so sweetie work was fucking awful OK”she shouted

“Oh mum I'm sorry what are you going to do i mean i think the heyw--“

“Oh shut up you’re so pathetic you know,I mean you inside on a Friday night? should you be out like a normal teenager huh?god”she scoffed

“What mom I-“by now half the bottle was empath,being drank with such desperation

“I’ll get another job I’ve already got the heywards they can give me more time and an I-I’ll get a side job we’ll be fine w-we have dads money too”

“Sont talk about hijm!It’s your fault your father left you fucking incompetent piece of shit you make everyone want to leave,no wonder you have no friends. I mean look at you your pathetic you know these people in your books there not real DAISY god why can’t you just be normal you drove everyone away.this is your fault”

Tears were now threatening your eyes,but as you looked into the person infront of you,you didnt see sadness,you saw anger,you saw red.

“Mum Im sorry i-ill-“

Before you could say anything she downed the rest of the bottle and threw it at you.glass smashing everywhere cutting you up.your whole arm started to bleed as you cried out in pain your mum hit you,ran out and slammed the door shut.

she hit you.hit you.you ran upstairs not bothering to protect your arm wrapping it up in an old shirt.you needed your best friend,you didn't have many friends but he was yours you knew that nothing anyone said could change your friendship

So you called him running out of your house in todays clothes covered in blood like you’d been in a fucking horror movie

“Heyyy daisy you change your mind”he answered the phone

“Hey pope I-I need some help my mom a-are you still at a-at the p-party”you stuttered

“Woah woah breathe daisy where are you I’ll come get you okay”

“I’m near the boneyard you still there I-I’m sor-ry f-for calling i didn’t kn—“

He cut you off “no shut up it’s fine where are you,are you hurt what happened?”

“My arm s-she h-hit b-bottle “

“Fuck where are you daisy “

“Oh-oh my god there’s so many people here”you were sure you were having a panic attack by now,-you could barely breathe

“Wait daisy I-i see you I’m coming okay wait there”

“O-okay”

Hanging up the phone you were now just balling your eyes out in pain and hurt. You curled up into a ball only looking up when you could hear pope shouting in the distance.

“Shit daisy”he shouted

“I’m sorry I didn’t know where to go,my mum she she my arm I- I”

Pope wasn’t unfamiliar to your panic attacks,usually being the one to calm you from them,/

“Daisy breath okay”he stroked your hair making you look into his eyes

“What happened “he asked and you showed him your arm “shit daisy that’s close to a main artery your losing loads of blood C'mon let’s get you cleaned up back at the chateau “you just nodded following him his hand holding yours hiding you from the people as you walked past. Arriving at a group of people probably his friends,the pogues,. As your vision begins to go hazy you think that maybe your mum was right you are pathetic .He was out on a Friday night ,I looked like the whole damn school was here.he has his life maybe he didn’t want to be your friend maybe he didn’t want to just hurt you .realizing you were fading out he shook you “shit daisy no no no “he cursed“John b keys I need the keys”you heard him say and they were saying something about him getting some “dude shut up this is daisy she’s hurt “you heard him say and all of them looked at you,but you couldn’t bring your eyes too meet them.Soon enough pope was dragging you away and towards a shack,the chateau.

He dragged you inside and you were sitting on the Island In the kitchen/living room,this was a home.

where was your home now?.

“Here lemme see ''he pulled your arm and started to work. It didn’t surprise you he was so good at this he was always good at first aid but this?

Lucky it wasn't on a actual artery but the blood made it look worse,acknowledging the fact you'd been so quiet,he spoke up “hey D look at me “he said pointing your chin up,looking at you straight in your eyes”what happened,when your ready”he asked.As your breathing steadied,you began to speak “my mom,she got back from work sh-she just lost her job a-and”you stuttered,pausing to collect your breathe

“hey it’s okay take your time okay”he calmed you”she hasn’t drank since..”you stopped and he looked in your eyes.Pope knew all about your dad,leaving you when you were about to go into junior year,you never knew why but one day he was their next he wasn’t,pope helped you through it,when you began to get closer.

“Your dad?”he answers for you

You nodded

“She said that it-it was my fault that he left and that she lost her job an”you gulped,recomposing yourself“How I push everyone away and that’s why I have no friends I mean let’s face it”laughiing a breathy laugh “she’s right”popes head snapped up “Daisy!you have me,D its okay I’m you best friend and you know she’s wrong okay now this is going to hurt”he assured you,before you could ask questions your arm burned up from the straight alcohol he’d put on your arm “FUCK POPE SHIT WARNING PLEASE FUCK”you shouted and he laughed,frowning when he came too “Sorry,shit this is bad daisy,like really bad,I dont know what to do,I can just wrap it up But ii think you should go to the hospital“he said and before you could fight,a deep voice filled the room.

“What the fuck is going on pope”curse from the back of the room.After observing the heaps of bloody tissues and your T-shirt laying next to you“What the fuck happened to her man,who is this?”he asked pope who looked up at you,asking the silent of’should i tell him’ you shook your head with pleading eyes

Pity took over popes vision as he answered JJ’s question“Jj this is daisy,daisy jj”he introduced you and you sighed,finally meeting the blue eyed boy with watery vision“hey,sorry we,urm, woke,you”you stuttered “oh i wasn’t sleeping princess”he winked causing you to furror your eyebrows at the boy you heard stories about ,following up to the elephant int he room.”what happened”he asked,re-observing your surroundings,eyes finally meeting your bloody arm “holy shit you gotta fucking c-cat or something”he demanded .Before you could awnser,a half naked girl stumbled out of his room,pouting

“oh you really weren’t joking when you said you weren’t asleep”you giggle then pope accidentally pressed to hard into your arm making you scream “fuck pope Jesus fucking shit”you cursed

“Fuck I’m sorry but its clean and the plasters won’t do much but I’ll wrap it up anyways i still think you might have to go to hospital”you shook your head “no no no no I can’t pope you know that”he sighed “look nerd you know where she cut look how close that is daisy okay” pointing to your bandaged arm jjs eyebrows furrowed in confusion

You tore away from his gaze to the the floors

“Hey jj,what's taking so long sweets”his guest said,in a thick country accent causing him too sigh turning around going back into his room.You don’t know what he said but five minuets later she was storming out the rusted doors,huffing and puffing, and left and he walked back to you two

“Sorry”you looked at him and his eyes softened.You were gorgeous and so innocent who would do this to you?.he asked himself”don’t be she was to Whiny anyways you saved me”you smiled ,slightly rolling your eyes at the player you'd been warned from.

“Daisy”pope snapped you back to reality “hospital?”

“Pope I can’t I-I’ll just go home and-“you babbled

”no no way you're not going back there daisy okay not if your moms like she is right now”he said under his breath in attempt to be secretive

“Your mom?”jj thought out loud and you just looked at him,mentally cursing yourself

Ignoring the blondes “you know i can’t do that pope”you mumbled looking down.

“Why”he snapped

“Because I live there pope”you paused,forgetting the blonde”you know and it’s not like this is new, you know it’ll blow over”you urged,trying to convince yourself

“And what if i doesn't daisy”he quizzed” what are you going to do then”he asked causing you to freeze and stand in silence.

You walked up and hugged him,stifling a sob.Skilfully dodging your arm,you let go of him and held his stare.

“Pope,your my best friend, okay?Well my only friend. You know that, but you gotta understand why I’ve gotta go home,Besides, she’s probably not even in,she left straight after, she’s probably out okay”you insisted”I’ve got that job with you and your dad tomorrow I’ll see you okay”you insisted

After some silence he looked at you,”I’ll drive you home okay and if she’s there your coming back to mine”he hissed”You can crash in the couch like you did last time okay “he urged”let me just go talk to jj okay”he said leaving you in the kitchen ,now only realizing the blonde had left the room.After overhearing some not-so hushed whispers,pope came out followed by a blonde who carried an angered but also slightly pained expression that left you wondering what pope said in there.Did he tell him about your mum?

After snatching the keys from the side,where you left them,he led you guys into the van.You and pope got into the back and he and just hugged you there it was nice he calms you and you calm him .“Hey pope”you break the silence“Yeah”he returned“Sorry”you apologised“Stop”he spat.

You looked up to him,eyebrows arching up in confusion“What?”you pleaded,provoking him to roll his eyes and your tendency to apologise after any slight inconvenience“Doing it”he grumbled“Doing what”you urged,oblivious to what was annoying him“You always apologise,after everything”he answered letting out a slightly breathy laugh“Sorry”you laugh realising you already subconsciously apologised.“See what I mean”he tutted“Right but thank you”you pushed“Always nerd”he promised“Geek”you sassed,falling into a comfortable silence,enjoying who you considered your family now

“Hey daisy” he broke the silence

“Hm”you humed

“Did you take them today”he asked,you sighed

“I thought I’d be okay pope,i was i promise”you pleaded

“Daisy”he sighed

“I hate them pope,they make me feel so deflated,they make me feel like a monster”you mumbled into his shoulder

“You have to take them daisy you know that”he scolded

“I’m know i Just”you paused

“I know”he cut in

“I don’t want to be a monster anymore pope”

“Your not a monster daisy,i promise,you're amazing bub”he praised

Finally pulling up to your house,met with a cleaver driveway you turned back to pope who was checking for the same thing you were “see”you deflated”i'll be fine see you in the morning,7 sharp kids” you teases in his dad's warning tone

“Daisy i still think you should come back to mine i don't think you’ll b--”

You pleaded his anxious babbling with a kiss on the cheek”see you in the morning”you demanded and he sighed

You popped your head through to the front

“Thank you for the ride jj sorry about interrupting your night” you apologised and he smiled at you”no worries princess,we oughta be seeing you in daylight too though”he asked “maybe blondie”you winked giving pope one last hug before you made your way through the door,treading carefully,just to be safe.

#jj #jj outer banks #jj imagine #jj x reader #jj maybank #outerbanks #obx #obxfic #pope heyward #jj x y/n #jj x oc #pope x yn #pope x reader #pope x oc lovetriangle?#newfic #anypotential whatsoever?#I HAVE A PT2 BC IT WAS SO FFFFFING LONG #LMK IF U WANT IT

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anythingandeverything1d · 4 years

Text

Bandmate Harry

“Thank you and goodnight!” Harry yelled, walking off stage. You finished the drum solo, allowing the rest of the band to walk off and then followed suit, waving to the crowd as you walked by. You meet in the circle backstage and high five the rest of the band and Harry.

“We killed it tonight!” you screamed with a smile. Harry gave you the look and you settled down, waiting for the end of show meeting. Some of the tour crew joined in and you rolled your eyes. They were always acting like they were part of the band.

“Great job everyone. Rest up tonight, we do it again tomorrow. Does anyone have any notes they'd like to share?” Harry asked looking around the circle.

One of the lighting guys raised his hand, “What did you think of the lighting tonight, specifically the spotlighting during Falling and Treat People with Kindness?”

“I loved it, great job.” Harry smiled.

“Actually,” you cut in. “I do think you could do a better job. I mean you basically blinded the band during Cherry. We’ve had this problem for weeks now..I feel like we shouldn't have to keep bringing it up.”

Harry gave you a warning look and you gave it right back to him. “I’m sorry about that, is there something you suggest us changing?” the lighting man asked. He looked embarrassed, and he should have. He wasnt doing his job.

“I don't know? Maybe figuring out your job?” you remarked back. Harry intervened.

“Its been going great. Thank you. I don't feel like you need to change anything and its my call.” He shot you a look and you rolled your eyes. “Meetings over, everyone get some sleep.” You turned to walk towards the bus when Harry grabbed the back of your shirt and pulled you into his dressing room. “Sit.” he ordered.

You sat on the couch and crossed your arms looking up at him. “What do I owe this pleasure?”

Harry was pacing in front of you. “How many times have we had this talk now?”

“I don't know...” you grumbled.

“Exactly because its happened too many times. This is getting ridiculous (y/n). The way you treat the tour crew is absolutely unacceptable. You do not run the shows, you are not in charge, and you do not have the ability to talk to people like that. They are equivalent to you and your position on our team.”

“But-”

“No. No buts. This is the last time we are having this talk or you are gone. You're also grounded.”

“Grounded?!” you yelled standing up. “You cant ground me!”

“I just did.”

“Youre not my parents.”

“You're only 16, and your parents left me in charge of you while we were away on tour so yes. Yes I can. No going out tonight.”

“Or what?”

“Or you will be out of the band. I will send you home.”

“You wouldn't do that.”

“I can easily find a drummer, probably one who treats the crew better too.”

“Harry..” you moaned.

“No. Don’t Harry me.” He ran his fingers through his hair and looked at you. “You know that I love you. You know I don't want to have to remove you from the tour...but I will if I have too. Understood?”

“Yes” you mumbled.

“What was that?”

“Yes I understand.” you said. “Now can I go?”

Harry sighed and nodded his head. You walked back to your dressing room. You threw your phone onto the couch and screamed. He thinks he can march in here and tell me what to do. He thinks he's my dad. I don't have to listen to him. I can do whatever I want. Im basically an adult now. Having Harry as your older brother or parent figure on tour was fun...most of the time. He played games, kept you updated on drama, listened to your drama and made sure you were always okay and comfortable. Other times though, like tonight, he overstepped his big brother role. Your phone buzzed and you saw a text from Noah, your boyfriend. *Im outside.* You smiled and ran to the door. Noah was waiting backstage and you tackled him when you got outside. He squeezed your bum and grinned. “Hey you. Ready to go?”

“Go where?”

“Theres this dope night club. They are going to do a Cold Play night.”

“Really?” you asked.

“Yeah. Lets go. We can get food before.”

“Okay let me just grab my jacket.” You kissed his cheek and ran inside. When you walked past Harry’s room, you could hear the shower going. He won't even know. You taped a Do Not Disturb sign on your dressing room door and locked it on your way out. You met Noah outside and he took his hand pulling you to the car waiting.

Your first stop was getting dinner. The two of you stopped off at a restaurant downtown. “Got lucky that you had the night off.” Noah said stuffing another fry into his mouth.

“Yeah. Harry went off on me today again.”

“Again? What for?”

“He thinks that I’m being rude to too many people. The thing is..those people aren't doing their job.”

“Yeah, its not really his place to tell you either. He's not your mom and dad. He's not even related to you.”

“Exactly. He tried grounding me.”

Noah laughed and you kicked him under the table. “Im sorry but thats ridiculous. He grounded you?”

“Yeah thats what he said.”

“Well who does he think he is?”

“I don't know.”

“Well just forget him. We are going to have fun tonight. I’ll even get you drinks.” He winked and you smiled. Noah was 21. He was a bit older than you but you needed an older guy. The ones your age were so immature. After finishing dinner your phone buzzed. *Want to come play games with us?* You rolled your eyes and ignored Harry’s text. He texted again, *Come on (y/n)..you cant stay mad forever*

You texted him back a middle finger emoji and turned your phone off. He was not going to ruin this night. You grabbed Noah’s hand and followed him into the club. When you enter its wall to wall people. Viva la vida is playing and you instantly jump up and pull Noah to the dance floor where you're singing along, “I hear Jerusalem bells are ringing, Roman Cavalry choirs are singing, Be my mirror, my sword and shield, My missionaries in a foreign field, For some reason I can't explain, Once you go there was never, never a honest word, And that was when I ruled the world”

The night was going smoothly. You hadn't heard anything else from Harry and Noah was a lot of fun. He was buying you drink after drink and you had to admit you were feeling it. You were slurring words and tripping over other people. Paradise started playing, it was one of your favorite songs and you instantly started singing. “When she was just a girl she expected the world, But it flew away from her reach, So she ran away in her sleep and dreamed of, Para-para-paradise, para-para-paradise, para-para-paradise, Every time she closed her eyes” Noah came over and danced with you. He roughly pulled you back against him, his fingers digging into your hips. “ow” you mumbled. He kissed down your neck and reached his hands up the skirt you were wearing. “Noah-”

“Shh have a little fun baby.” His fingers pushed through your panties and his lips were sucking on your neck.

“Stop. This isn't what I want to be doing.” You were sobering up real quick. You turned around to push him off but he grabbed your butt hard enough you were going to be bruised. You whimpered in pain.

“Don't be a little pussy.” he said harshly.

“Noah let go.” You pushed against his chest harder and he laughed. He grabbed your wrist and pulled you in.

“Stop fighting (y/n). Just let loose a little.”

“No. Stop.” you pulled away and he grabbed you again “Noah let go. Serious-”

“She said let go.” Harry’s deep voice growled behind you. Your stomach sank. You looked back and Harry looked lethal, it almost scared you. Noah laughed and looked at you.

“Look its your pretend parent.” He expected you to laugh but you were afraid of both situations and didnt do anything. Noah gripped your wrist harder. “Isn't that funny?”

“Yeah.” you fake laughed and pulled your wrist free of his grip. He stumbled forward but Harry stopped him. Harry’s hands were on his chest and his normally bright and cheerful eyes were full of anger.

“When a girl says let go. You let go.” Noah swallowed, recognizing the different side of Harry he was seeing. “Do you even get that she's underage. She's 16 fucking years old and your giving her alcohol and trying this shit? Its illegal.” Noah nodded and tried backing up.

You suddenly got very afraid Harry was going to hit him. “Harry.” you grabbed him and pulled him back. “Lets just go okay? He's not worth it.” Harry seemed to calm down a little. He turned his anger to you and pointed at the door.

“Now.” he grabbed your hand and pulled you from the club. You didnt even say anything. You didnt know what to say. You had been caught red handed.

Harry pushed you into the passenger seat of his black SUV. He buckled you in and then jumped in the driver side. Without saying anything he just started driving. “I’m sorry.” you said. “I know you said not to go out but I just thought it would be fun and Noah said there was a cold play night and I love cold play and” Harry didnt even look over. You sighed and dropped your head into your hands. You started crying, you weren't sure if you were scared after what happened with Noah, drunk from the alcohol, or frustrated that you screwed up with Harry. “I shouldn't have gone. I know I didnt listen. I’m sorry.” Harry pulled over and parked the car. He turned and looked at you.

“Are you okay?” he asked calmly.

“Yeah..” you wiped the tears and looked at him. “I-”

“Stop. I want you to seriously think about it. Are you okay?” You were still crying when you nodded your head. Harry got out, walked around opened your door and hugged you. His arms tightly wrapping around your body. He rubbed your back and just held on until you calmed down. He wiped your cheeks and smiled. “Breathe (y/n).”

You took a shaky deep breath and nodded. Harry had gotten back in the car and was driving somewhere past the arena. “Where are we going?” You started to panic. What if this was it, what if he was sending you home now? “Please...Pleasedoonttakemehome” you cried.

Harry laughed and shook his head. “I’m not taking you home.”

“Where are you taking me?”

Harry pulled into a frozen yogurt shop and smiled. “Come on.” He handed you a cup and told you to get whatever you wanted. You loaded it with fruit candy and chocolate. Harry sat down with his at a table and you followed suit. He watched you calm down while eating the yogurt. “Now. Are you ready to talk about this?” You nodded tears forming again. You tried blinking them away but it wasnt working. “(y/n) youre not in trouble.” Harry said with a sigh.

“I’m not? But-but you said”

“I know. I was wrong. I shouldn't have punished you like that. Its just that youre so frustrating sometimes. I want you to understand where this is all coming from. Youre like my baby sister and I don't want you to make bad decisions. I don't want you to turn out a total bitch.”

You smiled and nodded. “I know.”

“I shouldn't try and parent you. I shouldn't have grounded you. I just need you to know that talking to the crew like that isn't okay.”

“I know. Im trying I really am.”

He nodded. “I know. Thats why Im letting you lying and sneaking out go tonight.”

You nodded. “It won't happen again.”

“I know. I also think we should talk about boys. Can’t you find like a nice church boy? Someone your own age.”

“Harry you do realize I’m always around older guys right?”

“Yeah, which is fine. Just don't date them. There have to be other options. I mean that guy was an absolute dick.” You laughed and Harry laughed. “I don't want to see you get hurt. I thought you were going to end up hurt tonight.”

You nodded. “I almost did but my big bro saved me.”

“I always will.”

---

Got this request forever ago (SORRY) but I hope its what you were expecting! Let me know how old you all are also, I’d love to write more in your perspective vs mine!

xoxo

#one direction #directioners #one direction fanfiction #one direction imagines #Harry Styles #harrystyles #harry styles fanfiction #harry styles imagine #harry styles imagines

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