#i didn't think anything of it until episode 5 when he laughed at 'you wouldn't get that kind of performance from a modern car'

[altruistic-meme]

ive successfully gotten most of my family to watch good omens (s1), including everyone who I thought i COULD convince and 1 who i DIDN'T

[transsongtaewon]

On the screen, a man and a woman kissed in the rain, possibly while crying.

Based on Yoohyun's half-hearted observations on the drama, before this scene, they had broken up no less than three times, destroyed multiple life-long friendships, and been, just, really annoying all the way through. But now they had their happy ending. At least until they found out that the man had slept with the woman's evil twin. Yoohyun wasn't sure if the man knew it was the twin and not the woman, but he also did not particularly care.

He mostly just wanted the drama to end.

Not that he had anything better to do while waiting for Yoojin to get done at the vet clinic. Technically, Yoojin's shift had ended ten minutes ago, but it wasn't like a secretary could just hang up in the middle of a phone-call, no matter how annoying the caller was. At least that's what Yoojin claimed, Yoohyun did not feel the same.

But until Yoojin came to get him, he would just have to sit in the waiting room and watch the drama the clinic for some reason considered suitable waiting-room-entertainment. Maybe it had been chosen because there was an entire arc centered around a dog dying and was therefore deemed thematically relevant for people who came to the clinic to have their dogs put down.

When those episodes aired the waiting room was filled with more sniffles than usual.

Yoohyun really wished the drama had never been filmed back then.

"Did you have to wait long?"

"No, hyung."

Yoojin was wearing the jacket he had been given at his delivery job, still layered above the vet-clinic scrubs, looking exhausted but cheerful. The same as he always did.

Yoohyun smiled at him. Yoojin grinned back.

Yoojin cast a look at the tv where the man and the woman were now holding hands in a park, interrupted by occasional shots of the woman-but-with-glasses-on (the evil twin) looking menacing.

He sighed dreamily. "Ah, love. Beautiful, isn't it?"

Yoohyun was not entirely sure what exactly was supposed to be beautiful about all the miscommunication and tears he had been told by countless shows and movies were the pinnacle of love, but he nodded along anyway.

"And to think one day, my beloved little brother will find love for himself." Yoojin ruffled his hair, making Yoohyun pout a little.

"But I already love you more than anyone, hyung."

Yoojin laughed, clearly touched but also bemused. "But Yoohyun-ah, I don't meant that kind of love. I mean when you grow up and meet a nice girl to settle down with and I get to babysit all my cute nieces and nephews."

"Mhm."

Yoohyun decided not to protest any more. Yoojin seemed to care greatly about Yoohyun's hypothetical romantic future, even if Yoohyun knew deep down that he would never love anyone that way.

He realised this basically the moment the concept of romantic love started being floated around by the adults in his life, be it by the kindergarten teachers calling any boys and girls playing together "little boyfriends and girlfriends" or fairy tales declaring the power of the love's kiss. It all sounded rather silly to him.

Very few seemed to share his perspective on the matter, though. Maybe he was just born different. It wouldn't be the only way he failed to match the expectations for a person.

"Come on, Yoohyun. We have to run if we want to catch the bus."

Yoohyun got up and patted down his school uniform, making sure he didn't leave anything behind in the waiting room. As they went outside, he threw one last glance at where the man and the woman were having carefully choreographed, mostly implied sex and knew that this would never be him.

Written for Sctir Pride Week Day 5: "Born This Way"

[mrs-monaghan]

Hi Shaz, It’s my birthday today but I need cheering up. Can you hit me up with some of your favourite underrated jikook moments and why 💜💛🐰🐤 (and if people can comment some of theirs too if they have any)

First things first, HBD Anon!!!! 🎉🎉🎈🎈🎉🎊🎊🎂🎂🎂🍾🍾🍷🍷🍹🍺🍺🍸🥂🍸🥂🎂🎈🎈

Smile today, don't let anyone bring you down. No matter what. 💜💜

Second of all, u guys that keep sending me asks about my ___ Jikook moments, you are killing me! It's torture. To have to choose from what we have is really hard y'all. It's not easy.

But okay, my favourite underrated Jikook moments. Let's get into it. Again, HBD!! 🎈🎈🎈

Number 1 >> Decoration tah!

For the life of me I cannot explain why I love this moment as much as I do. I just know it puts the biggest smile on my face whenever it comes up in a compilation I'm watching. Idk what it is, I just think this moment is wholesome AF. And when JK reacted to it I DIED!!!! It was everything to me, i was so happy. Of course its underrated, coz they're not really doing anything. Just laughing about and having a good time enjoying each other's company. But I love 2 see it. 😍😍

Number 2>> JK preparing a plate for them and Jimin turning to JK to ask for more soup.

It's so domestic 😭 Because this is how they are on their normal day to day lives. Like Jin told us; JK is Jimin's chef. And as we already saw, JK always makes sure Jimin is very well fed, always. Even blows the soup for him if it's hot and we have seen him feed Jimin many times. This moment, no one talks about, but I just really like it.

Number 3>> When JK was there for Jimin when he got nervous

It criminal that this isn't one of the most popular Jikook moments. The way JK was giving Jimin ALL his attention. The way he was nodding along in encouragement. The way he got closer when Jimin made that mistake. The way JK didn't move back into position until he was sure Jimin had gotten back on track. This moment was e👏🏾very👏🏾thing👏🏾 and I wish we talked about it more. JK did so well as Jimin's boyfriend there. He showed up. He really fucking showed up. I respect this man so damn much for always showing up.

I enjoyed Jeonssy's analysis of this moment. You can watch it here if you like.

Number 4>>> Jimin, kneeling, doing that thing with his tongue while looking up at JK 👀

I think the reason Jikookers don't talk about this moment it's because of how sexually suggestive it is. And you can see the moment Jimin catches himself too. Mans got carried away there for a second. I wasn't around for kitty gang Jimin but I believe it when people say he was wildin'. Like Jimin, please, we know you get down on your knees for the Jungkonda, we did not need a visual. 🙈🙈🙈

I high key love that moment very, very much. 🥵

Number 5>> Jungkook waiting and waiting and waiting for Jimin all because his boyfriend asked him to.

Aish. Y'all don't get it. JK was among the first people who finished. This is episode 126-127. They're some of my favourite episodes that I rewatch all the time. They were so good. Anyway, Mr. Competitive finished 2nd so he was gonna go be among the first people to go home. And he was excited too! But then Mimi said 2 words: Jungkookah, wait. And that's all she wrote 🤭🤭🤭

Y'all aren't getting it. This was actually huge. I wouldn't do that for my sister and I love that bitch. If I finish a game first, and she kept losing and losing and kept me waiting for an hour I would take off. Shit, I'd take off after 20 minutes. You know who I'd wait for though? My partner 😂 Because that's just how it works. Jimin has the boyfriend privilege. Sure this was him being in charge but also this was JK listening to his man and doing exactly what he said. Now I'm thinking about Bon voyage season 4 when JK stayed by the doorway and didn't move simply because Jimin asked. Who said JK doesn't listen to Jimin again? 🤭

Anyway, JK couldn't wait to leave. We can tell by how happy he was when Jimin won rock paper scissors, and yet, he didn't mind waiting for as long as he did for Jimin who finished last. This moment is massive and I think it should be treated as such. 😔

Number 6>> When JK did this.

He probably just wanted to touch his baby. But also, it looks like he made Jimin stop. And Jimin listened and stood there and they did that adorable dance together. The dance part is not underrated. But the way JK touched Jimin is. And I absolutely love this cute, soft moment.

Number 7>> Speaking of touching. This compilation of Jikook touching on stage for the sake of touching. It's actually really subtle and kudos to the Armys who first noticed this is a thing that they do. Jikook absolutely love the stage. JK was asked when he feels most connected to the members and he said he loves when him and Jimin high five on stage. That's when he feels the most connected. He singled out Jimin even though the question was about all of them. And this thing where they touch like this for no reason whatsoever, proves his statement to be true. I freaking love them!

Number 8>> When JK was asked to rate the members and he finally put Jimin as number one. Everyone always talks about JK putting Jimin last in the past. But I'm not sure this moment gets the hype it deserves. This question was stupid AF to begin with but whatever. What I love about this moment is how JK didn't even bother to rate anyone else. He just said Jimin is the most handsome according to his own personal criteria, and then left it at that. Almost like he only cared that Jimin knew he was number one. He wanted Jimin to know he was done playing games. So rating the rest was irrelevant when he'd already made his point.

I also don't think Jimin was expecting this which is a bit sad, idk. But I'm sure he appreciated not being ranked last. Again. However i don't think that was ever going to happen. By this time JK was done pretending he didn't like Jimin on and off camera. He'd stopped pretending he didn't have feelings for him so I think many of us, much like RM, expected JK to place Jimin first at this particular juncture.

Number 9>> Gaaaaaaah! I love this so freaking much!!!! Okay so Jimin is a blusher. We know this. While when he blushes for JK it can be more intense than for other members, Jimin is a blusher. Its a thing he does. JK on the other hand, not so much. Which is why I love this so fucking much. 😍😍 My other underrated moment is JK blushing for Jimin. I literally never see people talk about this even though JK doesn't blush or get shy for anyone else apart from Jimin. I mean look at this!!!

I said look at this!!! Are you looking??

You guys don't listen to me. Did you see?? Especially the black swan one??? Shiet. A bashful JK? Sign me up! JK does not blush for other people. He's not a blusher. Only Jimin can make him that shy. Do y'all get it? This side of JK is reserved for Jimin and Jimin only. He's the only one that affects JK this way. Aaaaah feels. 😭😭😭 FEELS.

It's criminal, absolutely criminal that people overlook shy, blushy JK. I love to see it. I love it so much. I could watch it all day.

Last but not least. Number 10>> This.

I mean, what is wrong with you people? Honestly. By you people I mean antis because... okay first of all, lets watch the video. Not the first part where they sing to eo. That's definitely not an underrated moment. I mean the second part at the concert.

Tweet

Did you see that?

JK doing that 👆🏽 and Jimin doing this, these 2 moments sit at the same table. They outed themselves here guys. And no one was listening. They are telling us look, its him. Its him. They took risks and said fuck it. And they got away with it. Like they get away with everything else. Smh 😑

They literally outed their relationship guys. We should be freaking out more. That moment at that concert is super underrated. And it requires Eagle eyed army to see it. But damn, JK really did that. Wow.

Just wow.

Anyway anon. That's all I got for now. Happy birthday once again. If Jikook isn't real, then neither I'm I.

[zurajanaizurakoda]

Katsura's Lasik Adventure

This post is still on my mind, where Elizabeth discovers that Katsura has always had bad eyesight but hates Amanto technology and refuses to acknowledge that there's anything wrong with him. Specifically when I suggested Elizabeth would want to perform non-consensual Lasik on him while he slept. I'd like to clarify that non-consensual activities are normally very bad but this is a scenario that would very much happen in Gintama, wouldn't be weird by their standards, and would make you laugh. So anyway,

(mild warning for comedic violence, especially if you don't like eye trauma)

Gin and Elizabeth accidentally knock Katsura out while fighting over whether they knock him out or drug him (Of course Gin is on this shit, Elizabeth showed up and indicated through signs that she intended to fuck with Katsura-san in a way that is morally indefensible and technically felony assault, but in the end would be beneficial to him and might even help keep him safe and Gin didn't even put up a pretense of asking for a payment, he was down with that.

(to be fair, I think Gin feels this way about anyone vulnerable to social degradation)

Also, yes, they were arguing about how to kidnap Katsura right in front of him, he's famous for not paying attention.

So anyway, he's already unconscious so why look a gift horse in the mouth. It takes them all of fifteen seconds to convince the Lasik people that Katsura was nervous and got drunk before the procedure (because Gintama) and (because Gintama) it's either a 5 second procedure reminiscent of scanning a barcode or it's a lengthy horror scene reminiscent of the dentist episode where Katsura is strapped into a machine in a blatant rip-off of Clockwork Orange and you don't see the procedure, just the increasingly distressed looks on Gin and Elizabeth's faces as you hear sounds of power tools that should not under any circumstances be used around eyes. You know there is no in between.

In any case Katsura is fine by the next scene and they leave him where he was knocked out. As he's waking up it occurs to them they never came up with a reason for his eyesight to change and as Katsura sees leaves on trees for the first time they run through a dozen unlikely scenarios before they settle on convincing him he must have hit his head in the exact right spot to activate superhuman vision. (Medically plausible! Didn't you hear about that one guy in that one place?) And within a minute Katsura's convinced that his eyesight was always fine but now it's omniscient.

He proceeds to lecture Gin and Elizabeth on their poor eyesight, drawing attention to things any sane person would notice normally like he's unveiling clues at a crime scene, laughs boisterously about everything and being generally insufferable until they mutually decide to kick his ass (most Katsura-centric plots involve this in some way)

To everyone's surprise, he becomes more clumsy (because he's distracted by everything) and his swordsmanship becomes significantly worse (because he's used to fighting based on sound and vague movement and all the new visual information is confusing and overwhelming) And for a week or two Elizabeth and the Yorozuya are forced to shadow him and keep him out of trouble like a Buttons and Mindy episode (90's kids, amirite?)

[wowpindrop]

Reunited | Ed Gamble

For: anon

Request:

I think it’s absolutely messed up how there is no Ed Gamble fic’s and was wondering if you can do a fluffy one for him? I’m not sure at all what it be about and will happily leave that to you but I am ADHD (Inattentive and distractible type) and was wondering if you could include the fic

Summary: you haven't seen Ed for a while due to him being on tour. You are missing him. A lot. Finally you two are reunited.

Notes: Hi! I'm so so sorry that it's taken me this long to write this. I've just started college so life has been very hectic and it took me a long while to think of a storyline I was happy with. I hope you like it and happy reading!

You opened your eyes slowly, groaning at the tiredness that washed over you. Checking your phone you glanced at the time.

4am

Great.

Just what you needed for today. You glanced over at the empty left hand side of the bed, and felt that familiar pang of longing.

How you missed Ed.

You two had been together for a couple of years now. However, you had never been apart for this long.

Ed was on tour, with his show Electric, travelling up and down the country performing to hundreds of fans on a nightly basis.

You were proud of him. Of course you were. Doesn't mean that you weren't jealous of those people that got to see him.

You felt your emotions more than the average person. You'd always been that way. That meant that the sadness you felt at not being able to see you're favourite asshole hurt just that little bit more.

Well you certainly weren't getting back to sleep now.

_____________________________________

You got yourself sorted as you always did. Shower, dressed, breakfast.

When finished, you plonked onto your couch and popped on something to watch. Unsurprisingly it was something Ed was in. An old episode of mock the week to be precise.

It made you smile to see the man you loved laughing so hard at his friends jokes.

You watched another episode.

And another.

You didn't know how many episodes you had gone through before your phone buzzed next to you, making you jump.

It was a message.

Your heart lept when you realised it was from Ed.

It was a fairly encrypted message that you couldn't really decipher. It contained four words:

Train station.

30 minutes.

Ed wasn't due home for a few weeks yet so you were very confused as to what he meant.

That's when you realised the time.

12pm.

Shit. How had that long passed already. You hadn't been sitting there for that long. Right?

Shaking that thought aside, you stood up to go to the train station as your boyfriend had requested. Still really confused as to what he was on about.

_____________________________________

You arrived at the train station about 20 minutes later, the hustle and bustle around you common for London at this time of day.

You stood in the main entrance, not really knowing what to do, back facing the doors behind you.

You stood for about 5 minutes, people constantly milling around you. Some running in the hopes that they wouldn't miss their train. Every now and again someone would brush arms with you accidentally, as the station was so busy.

You were beginning to get impatient. That is until you recieved another message.

Look behind you, dumbass

You frowned. The heck was he on about?

You turned, not seeing anything, until you felt a tap on your shoulder.

You spin back around to be faced with him.

Ed.

He was here, infront of you.

"Shit!" You jumped in suprise, not expecting to see him standing there.

"Did you miss me?" He smirked. You wrapped your arms around him, enveloping him in a huge hug. You smiled so glad he was here.

He ruffled your hair, laughing his all too familiar laugh at your delight. He hugged back and you revelled in the feeling of familiarity it brought you.

"I'll take that as a yes then." He teased, pulling back to look you in the eyes.

"What in the everliving fuck are you doing here, you're meant to be in Brighton tonight." You exclaimed, immediately worried that he would miss his gig.

"Eh. It only takes an hour or two by train. Anyway, I wanted to see my favourite gullible prick."

You flicked his forehead at that. Ed made a slight noise of pain as you laughed at his reaction.

"You have no idea how much I've missed you" you admitted, staring into those blue eyes.

"Me too. Me too" he replied.

You hugged again. Comfortable in each others arms.

Time seemed to stand still. It felt so good to be reunited.

_____________________________________

I hope that was alright. Sorry again for the delay.

I love Ed sm and the fact that there is no fanfiction for him is abysmal. Hopefully this makes up for that.

Hope you have a great day or rest of day!

[gardenerian]

Mel I am wondering when you think Ian told Mickey about Monica. When Ian had his first low episode, Mickey didn't seem to know what bipolar was or that Monica had it. Fiona said it. And then at the beginning of season 5 they both seemed to be avoiding the whole conversation about Ian being sick at all. And then Ian was hospitalized and then arrested and then Monica came back and then they broke up and then Mickey was arrested. I don't know. When do you think they finally had the time to discuss Monica? Ian's connection to her? How he insists he's not like her? Thanksgiving? I don't know. Just having Monica thoughts today.

how could you do this. you KNOW this is one of my favorite things to discuss 😭 and now i have no choice but to delay my ironing to take this way too far and Upset Myself.... but in a way that i thoroughly enjoy???? come on, chrissy. just gotta - *trips over self to start talking* - ugh. anyways. buckle the FUCK UP.

you're right - the timing never really allowed for any real conversation about her. mickey probably asked after ian came to find him in 1x09 - but it was likely surface level and i doubt there was much actual discussion before the Freezer Bang.

"the fuck was that about, gallagher?"/"psycho mom is back."/"fuck."/"yeah." [fumbling for pants ensues]

maybe mickey heard whispers about monica around the neighborhood, just like anyone had heard them about terry. and ian was still so resentful of her in s1/s2. if they talked about anything to do with monica, it probably wasn't her illness. maybe an offhand comment as they got more comfortable with each other in s2/s3. bonding over shitty parents - but not a lot of detail, i wouldn't think. there just wasn't time!

i don't think he talked about her at all in s4/s5. not to anyone. he was too sick and probably too deluded about his time with her. it had to confusing - to be so defensive of her, to want to connect with her, but also to still resent her and feel so viscerally offended at being compared to her? not to mention all the drugs and sexual trauma that resulted from being with her..... while suffering through vast changes and mood swings on top of that? impossible to sort through.

and part of s6 (i think) was internalizing it all. he's so fucking depressed in that season. remind me to go off on that another time. i don't think they would have really talked about her in the s7b arc, either - he probably wanted to talk about his job and laugh and fuck and soak up that time with mickey in the sun.

and then s8. i cannot speak of it askjfh he had nO ONE TO TALK TO ABOUT HER AND I KNOW MICKEY WOULD HAVE LISTENED I AM SICK ABOUT IT.

so i really think their first real conversation about her must have been in prison. isn't that wild? mickey probably picked up clues over the course of their relationship, and he definitely learned about bipolar disorder. but as much as we like to think that ian is chatty and emotional and soft.......... he's a closed book about certain things. and monica + their illness is absolutely part of that. so mickey hearing about monica FROM IAN probably took all these years. not for ian to trust him or anything - but i think. just time for ian to find the vocabulary. and the time. and just to be able to talk about it without so much pain.

so it probably starts with ian talking about what happened, everything that led to the van. losing her and losing mickey, feeling lost. mourning her alone. getting sick and losing control without seeing it again. feeling powerful and special until suddenly it was all over.

i think he probably wanted to be truly heard, finally, by someone that loves him. the siblings tried (mostly), but their own experiences with her clouded it over. which makes sense! but i think as they settled in, and as they told each other the stories that made their time apart, monica finally came into play.

how hard it was to lose such a complicated figure..... how he was the only one (save for carl, who was away at school) that didn't have a last happy moment with her. how his last moments with her were so hurtful and angry. but how he saw her and she saw him. she loved him, she made him feel special, even if she never came through for him. and he'll never see her smile again - and how, despite the pain she caused, he probably always thought he'd see it again.

at first, i think it was about mourning and connecting. letting it all out. they trade their horror stories about mexico, the cartel, the shelter and church, gay jesus..... the recent past, ya know? but then i think that the routine will get to him.

it's good, the structure. wake up, meds, work, downtime, meals, lights out. but i also think that the monotony would get to him before too long. the agitation as he is still recovering from a major episode. so i think that's when he'll start to get frustrated.

because he always said he wasn't like her, right? it drives him in many ways. to avoid putting himself and his family through that pain. but look where he is - he didn't flee, like she might have. he didn't drag his family into the legal battles, either. he's doing his time and trying to make it right.

but with the boredom and frustration and stagnation.... he's gotta wonder how much better he's doing. god. how SLOW recovery feels when the progress is not so visible, and when you have so much more to build up. he lost his job. and i think he'd talk about her more here. how he feared this. how scared he is that this is it. or how his family must be feeling about him now. her stealing from them, leaving them behind, putting them in danger. traumatizing her children on thanksgiving because she could never just get help and stick with it. it'll scare them both, talking about that day. but he's never really had the chance before - life just kept happening.

and this is where mickey kinda gets the earlier picture, i think. the things that were happening in s1/s2 come out. things he'd heard about in passing and pieced together. only now more directly from ian, finally. and his final break in s5 would probably come up here, too. particularly taking yev and ending things with mickey.

this is what they'll work on together. probably always, but starting while they're together all the time in prison. ian's fears of becoming unreliable, unworthy, and irredeemable. mickey's fears of never being able to keep him safe and close, of never being free together again. they'll heal over time together, always working at it.

now - the s4/s5 era. i think that's harder. i still don't think he's talking about all that yet. still vague mentions of being with her, of random memories that might pop up. but this era - the club, the men, the drugs, the uncontrolled mania, the crash. this is more intensive. i'm thinking this is a longer process. i'm not sure what the catalyst is. i'd hoped storylines like 11x03 and HOS might spark it.... in an ideal world, if i were in charge, it would be around here. and your fic, too, with tami and ian working through things together. feeling steady and stable, at last, in a way that allows him to talk about it and heal.

he and mickey have SO MUCH trauma. maybe after frank passes, they have a bit of a wakeup call. life is happening! here it is! to give themselves their best chance, they gotta do some work. so........ hopefully they'll keep talking about her. and not just the hurt! i like to think that mickey will give ian the space to remember her laugh, and the way her fingers felt in his hair. his mom. maybe they'll bring her flowers now and then.

and mickey will know her and ian will remember her, and she won't be such a ghost. she'll just be a fact of his life. someone to learn from, even now. i think ian will always be a little sad for her, but i think the gallaghers will all let go of their rage in time. frank and monica were who they were, and they gave the gallaghers each other. that's huge. ian will always work to live the life his mother never could, and he'll always have mickey there to tell him how well he's doing 🥺

i'm fine, why do you ask????

[leos-soggy-wolf-nuts]

Green Flag: Leo x Kinda-self-insert Episode 3

This is the first episode of this fic I'm writing after reading every route of Echo, so if you notice some kind of change (although, I doubt anyone is paying that much attention) that's probably why; Enjoy!

First disclaimer: I don't know how being a store manager works.

A disclaimer I'll bring over from Episode 1: I do not know how car insurance works.

"So...who's the wolf guy?" asks Ken, the pig who works the till. Ken is a brown-eyed, black-haired, nosey asshole. As his manager, I'll say that he's a good employee. As his friend, I'll say that he very consciously exploits my tendency to overshare. I ignore his question.

"You got a boyfriend, La-nee-oh-ell?"

My name tag at work says 'Lnioel'. He knows I hate it when he calls me that, and I groan accordingly. "He's just driving me to work, my car's a piece of crap."

"And it stinks, too." he retorts.

"Sure did after you were in there." I say under my breath, but loud enough for him to hear.

"Tch. Spiecist." he jokes as he stocks denim jeans on a shelf. The entrance bell dings, and we hush up and do our jobs, the clock ticking in tandem with the low-volume inoffensive music that fills the air for hours, and hours, and hours...and hours...until I'm numb and bleary-eyed.

The door rings again, and in its wake a wolf with red fur. I perk up, and smile a little, though the brain fog has only barely begun to clear. He spots me and walks over.

"It's quitting time, yeah?"

Ken raises his brows at me. I ignore him and check the clock. It's 5 on the dot.

"You're punctual, aren't you?" I say.

"Waiting is a pain. Didn't want to leave you hanging."

I smile at him, and go to get my stuff organized in the office. Papers go back in drawers, and my keys go back in my pocket. It's muscle memory, just like every other part of this job. The monotony is shattered, suddenly, as Leo leans conspicuously on the desk of the office. He's in another good mood.

"You do a lot of managing today?" he asks as I continue to move junk around. I snort.

"I don't even remember. Autopilot, the whole day, I swear."

"Amnesia." he says, enunciating the 'sia'. "How many fingers am I holding up?"

I look over at him with an incredulous expression. He's holding his hands out at me, his thumbs tucked behind his palms, out of view. He's grinning, though a gentle air pushes out of his teeth every half-second. He's trying not to laugh. I jokingly scowl at him and look back at my papers, which I'm trying to avoid showing him, as they're mostly doodles.

"Amnesia wouldn't make my eyes worse, thankfully," I say, suddenly a little too aware of how smudged my glasses are, "but even if I was an amnesiac, I'd have trouble forgetting you."

Bold. Intentionally. Oozing with plausible deniability.

Thankfully, it seems I won't have to deny anything. The wolf slides closer to me. "I'm on your mind, ciervo?"

He's close enough that I can feel his body heat.

And I wanna feel it all over me.

My antlers clack against the wall, and I clear my throat, unsure how to keep playing it cool. Is he just toying with me?

I don't mind being a toy.

Fuck. Fuck. Shit. Okay. I turn my body to lean against the desk just like he is, arms crossed, nonchalant, all casual smiles and ambient machismo.

"Nothing better to think about." I say.

That sounds stupid, but he gets the idea, sliding next to me, then twisting himself to stand right in front of me, so close our knees are touching.

"No boning in the office!" Ken shouts from outside, sounding only semi-serious. Leo and I chuckle, and I feel a pang of loss as he gets further away, beckoning me to join him outside. I spank him on the way out, making his tail jump. As we near the exit, Ken mockingly makes his hands kiss while Leo has his back turned. I flip him off and join the wolf outside. Night is just beginning to touch the horizon, the orange of the sky highlighting Leo's color, just as it had in the morning.

Leo snaps his fingers, remembering something. "I looked at your car today. You mind if I bring you to sign some stuff?" Leo says as the evening air swallows me. I nod. We board the chihuahua, and I grip my seatbelt as Leo slams down on the gas pedal. I'm less stressed out by his driving this time, flowing with the g-force.

CRASH!

"Puchica."

[slowtides]

heyo discussion of panic attack and suicidal ideation

So last night, I had this really long and suspended panic attack that has honestly been bubbling for a while now. It's partly related to considering coming out to my dad and partly related to something else that I can't talk about. But it basically involved this fear that I have that trying to have a future is pointless and fruitless because of mistakes I've made in the past that won't go away.

And it's just been a while since I've had a panic attack I guess. Just the acid in my throat, the cramps in my stomach, the pain in my head, the breaths that wouldn't come. Like everything was swimming around me and I couldn't see past the feelings assaulting my body. It lasted off and on for hours. My hands would tremble and I would coach myself through a breathing exercise and calm down for a minute, and then I would think about it again and it was like a weight that had been lifted was pressing down on me again suddenly. I had been having some nuisance hallucinations and they were getting more and more present, like shadows always on the edge of my eyes. It was so scary and hard and just. paralyzing I guess.

So I started making plans like I always do when I have a panic attack. I won't repeat them, but it was really fucking scary and hard. I don't know. It's hard to write about it without going back into that space, so I won't do it.

And then I remembered that post about suicide that blogger mattfraction made a long time ago. He talked about a suicidal episode he had where he was actually like about to go through with it but remembered that there was a comic series he was reading that hadn't finished publishing, and he really wanted to find out all that happened in that story. And that was what took him out of that moment. He ended up shaving half his pubic hair vertically so every time he looked at his bits he would laugh, and I guess he's still around. I don't know anything about him other than this post that my best friend sent me ten years ago when I was just starting college.

And it's so silly, but it's not silly to me. There's this super long fanfiction that I'm reading. It's over 1.5 million words right now, and there are still at least 500k words of story left that the author hasn't published (they publish every week). And I realized that I really want to find out what happens in this fanfiction, probably more than I have wanted anything else in a really long time. It feels silly to have it written out, but this is a story that I've been reading for years, that brings me so much comfort, that makes me feel like there are things I can be curious about. It is more effective than any career goal or personal mile stone because those are tied up in all the ways I'm afraid to fail or struggle. Because it's just this selfless person giving the gift of their creativity and writing to the world where I can share it. And that's so fucking awesome that I just have to stick with it.

I reread mattfraction's post, and he talks about a friend of his who tried to commit suicide but realized as it happened that he didn't want to go, all because a Van Morrison song came on the radio. And I thought of all the music that I really want to listen to. He also made this long list of things that are small reasons, dust motes, to shake out of suicidal ideation, and none of it is family or friends. But one of them is "who the fuck will love your dog like you do when you're gone?" and I thought of my cat. Who the fuck will love my cat like I do when I'm gone?

Also one of my greatest fears is that I will die at home and be eaten by my cat, and that was the final straw. I started to compartmentalize my feelings and think about short and long term coping mechanisms and solutions, and I made it through the night without relapsing or anything. I slept until 5 pm but that's okay.

I guess what I'm saying is that life can become difficult without warning. And I have possibly become better at managing these feelings than I was when I was younger. And Maybe I should call a doctor or at least a friend.

[feuervogel]

I posted 1,843 times in 2022

That's 378 more posts than 2021!

13 posts created (1%)

1,830 posts reblogged (99%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@sophiamcdougall

@edgeofpanic

@ironedorchid

@dirtyzucchini

@bossymarmalade

I tagged 1,824 of my posts in 2022

Only 1% of my posts had no tags

#cats - 98 posts

#lol - 72 posts

#art by op - 65 posts

#tumblr - 54 posts

#tik toks - 53 posts

#art - 52 posts

#memes - 46 posts

#humor - 33 posts

#uk politics - 28 posts

#hellsite (affectionate) - 28 posts

Longest Tag: 127 characters

#especially since my sister had a completely different relationship with her and wouldn't understand if i talked to her about it

My Top Posts in 2022:

#5

Recent media viewing

I decided to open up Netflix the other day and watch the Sandman adaptation. It's as good as everyone has been saying it is! And episode 5 has some gross bits that you'll see coming if you're paying attention (also, the nice black lady and her dog don't die, if you're worried about that). The Corinthian is EVEN CREEPIER in live action.

I spent a lot of time thinking "God, that actor looks and sounds familiar" whenever the Corinthian was on screen, but I looked him up and he wasn't in anything else I've seen, so I guess he's just got That Kind Of Face (or at least lower half of it, since he's got dark glasses on 95% of the time.)

While I was on Netflix, they showed me recommendations, as algorithms do, and I browsed the anime selection to see if there was anything to add to my (extremely long) watchlist.

I decided to watch Tekken: Bloodline, because deep in my heart of hearts, I love 2D fighting games. Not at all because I've been a JinHwo shipper since the early 2000s, nope. Anyway, it's a Netflix original, originally voiced in English. The voice acting ranges from fine (Jin, Hwoarang, Nina, Paul) to cringe (Jun, Xiaoyu) to comical (Heihachi), and for some completely unknown reason, Heihachi's assistant uses weeb-Japanese and says "hai" when she could say "yes, sir." (Like, this is the ONLY Japanese in the show. I'm not counting uses of sensei, because that's been borrowed into English as a martial arts term, or the time Paul says "Mishima Zaibatsu," because that's been in the US versions of the game since forever.)

Is it any good? It's not bad... It's basically the plot of Tekken 3, with references to 1&2, with Jin finding out about his family and Heihachi being a total asshole (I mean, duh). The character designs are weird, like their faces are too small for their necks and chins are too pointy, and somehow Jin looks like Heero Yuy in profile. I laughed a couple times (Paul (or maybe Nina): You two are friends? Jin & Hwoarang (unison): NO!) and may be on the way to shipping Jin/Hwo/Xiaoyu because they're ADORABLE.

When I got my new computer for Xmas, it came with a free 3-month trial of Apple TV. I didn't do anything about it until they sent me an email that it would go away if I didn't use it, then I signed up. There's actually a good bit of good stuff on there, so I'm keeping it for 4.99 a month.

Severance: suuuuper creepy SF mystery/thriller? where people can sign up to get implants that sever their work lives from their home lives so they can work on something so secret, even their work-selves don't know what it is. Season 1 ends with a massive cliffhanger that was extremely brave, because S2 hadn't been confirmed yet. (It is now.) It stars the guy from Parks & Rec and guest stars Christopher Walken.

The Essex Serpent: based on a book, apparently. Tom Hiddleston plays a vicar who lives out in the wilds in the 1880s or so; Claire Danes is a recently widowed paleontologist. Hiddles is utterly charming, as always; Danes is a bit flat, as always (I've always liked her, but she has about 2 expressions: confused and sad). There's a doctor who wants to date her, and her BFF/maid ALSO wants to date her, but she's only got eyes for the vicar (who's married, of course). Anyway, she hears rumors of a sea monster in the river and goes to investigate it, which is where she meets the vicar and so on. You can tell it's going to be a romance, but that part is somehow not compelling.

For All Mankind: space race AU where the Soviet Union gets to the moon first and NASA has to catch up. A lot of the real-world timeline is changed in ways that are good (space shuttles! moon base!) and bad (USSR doesn't collapse). In season 3, there is an extremely honest depiction of Gay Life in the 90s and of the within-group politics of assimilation or not. I lived through it (before I knew I was queer, or admitted it anyway), and it still punched me in the gut. We've made so much progress in the last 30 years that it's easy to forget just how terrible it was back then and that Don't Ask Don't Tell was the progressive compromise. It made me think about all the puriteens here on tunglr dot com and the stupid discourse about ~flawed media~ and ~problematique~ stuff. They should watch it and maybe fucking learn some history.

The end of season 3 is dfjhadkjghk;djkhgojwhjdfxhvjh basically and season 4 can't come soon enough.

5 notes - Posted August 20, 2022

#4

G witch ep 6

That was extremely fucked up.

They're speed-running all the super fucked-up bits from UC and 00. Good job.

9 notes - Posted November 6, 2022

#3

I have a very specific request, and I'm sure someone here can point me in the direction of acquiring this. (These, I guess; there are two specific fannish things I've wanted for a while.)

The litany against fear, in its entirety, in calligraphy or similar. Not twee. (I'm not actually into Dune, but having basically cognitive behavioral therapy on my wall might help me with my stupid anxiety.)

The Discworld DEATH bit "to be the place where the falling angel meets the rising ape", with or without the rest of the speech. (It's a long speech and would make the piece too busy.) Not twee. Potentially illustrated with silhouettes in the background behind the text.

I have no artistic ability nor any skill at graphic design, and I lack the patience for calligraphy. Thinking about embroidery or cross-stitch makes my fingers hurt. (My mom was an avid cross-stitcher and taught me when I was a kid. I could never hold the needle properly.)

Type of item: poster up to A2 size

Price: up to around 20 € each

13 notes - Posted September 5, 2022

#2

I can't be the only person who wants directors or whoever makes these decisions let Oscar Isaac have his gorgeous salt and pepper hair. A grown-ass man, silver at the temples, charming smile. Please?

Also I saw a comment about Dune that said they "aged him up" to play Duke Leto, and it took everything I had in me not to comment "oh, you mean they didn't make him dye his hair?"

32 notes - Posted January 23, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

Been playing Disco Elysium and I tried on some new pants.

[ID: screenshot from the video game Disco Elysium

YOU - I like regular, normal things.

VOLITION - Mhm, I know you do. These interisolary pants are like wearing a perfect *compromise* in your nether regions. No one will call the Moralintern on you like this, that's for sure.

You're a little more moralist now, buddy. A little more *normal*. Even if you didn't want to be.

COMPOSURE [Medium: Success] - Makes sense. This is what wearing boring office trousers does to you.

end ID]

39 notes - Posted November 25, 2022

Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →

[elithe31st]

father

hawks x gn!reader {platonic}

(ft. tokoyami)

req: me (s....someone please......reque..../nf)

reader desc.: (this is for if i have the reader be forced to wear something/have a quirk) ok so you're covered head to toe in bandages (not like a cast but like you look like a partially unwrapped mummy)

desc: hawks w/ a child....that was rescued from the lov because they were gonna turn you into a nomu...you didn't wanna go into any foster homes so hawks just let you stay with him..you're like 15-16 in this though

you swung up from the couch, sweating and panting like crazy. your head turned this way and that to look around the room you were in. you noticed the bag of groceries on the kitchen island you forgot to put away yesterday and sighed. these last 3 months have had your head twisted.

you got up from the couch—you had a choice if you wanted a bed, but to you the couch was far more comfortable—and started to put away the groceries. you looked at the clock by the windowsil and it read '2:56'. dad doesn't get up until 5 or 6... so he won't see me if im up this early, you thought. you had the habit of thinking people were gonna be mad if you were up before 5 or so, a habit you developed while you were in there.

the leauge of villians hideaway. the place that was covered head to toe in ants and flies. the place that made you shake every time you thought about it. oh well. you decided not to dwell on the past and instead grab (fav snack) {if your food item has to be microwaved lets just pretend its already hot...or something...} out of the bag. you plopped down on the couch and began eating. you grabbed the t.v. remote, making sure to turn it down so you wouldn't wake your father.

after 5 episodes of the same trashy adult sitcom you heard your dads bed creaking, a sign he was up and awake. you quickly threw your (fav snack) container away and moved back to the couch, snuggling into the covers. you quickly grabbed the remote and turned the t.v. off, closing your eyes.

you heard the door open and your heart dropped. you kept telling yourself that he wasn't going to hurt you, but you couldn't convince yourself. you felt your dad come over and scratch your head.

'hey, i heard the t.v. you don't haveta fake sleep around me kid.' he spoke in a calm and tired tone, still ruffling your hair.

you slowly opened your eyes, sighing and sitting up.

's-sorry..' you looked away from your father.

'it's alright kid. if you're wondering, the t.v. didn't wake me up, you're fine and safe with me, haha.' he let go of your hair, noticing the grocery bag was gone. he looked back at you and realized you probably got up before him again.

'hey, i was wondering if you'd like to go on patrol with your old man today? you seem like you need a pick-me-up.' hawks smiled at you, putting his hands behind his head. your eyes shot up at him.

'patrol..? l-like..“im gonna get swarmed with fans” patrol?' you played with your fingers a bit, eyes dropping down to your lap. hawks shrugged.

'ill just tell em to ffff— piss off. how does that sound?' he went to the fridge and grabbed some apples while talking to you.

'uh, well..i don't..have a hero costume or anything, w-wouldn't it look weird?' you laughed a bit, your dad going over and sitting next to you, handing you an apple. you took it and took a bite.

'eh, just put on a cool-looking jacket and some pants. boom, hero costume!' your dad laughed and so did you. he was pretty convincing.

'alright, ill go find something to wear.' you got up and dashed into the guest room he had, closing the door to change. you found a black undershirt and a heavy but loose black jacket with red orange and blue stripes. then, you put on some tights and loose-fitting cargo pants that went down in between your knee and your calf. finally, you put on some tennis shoes and called it done. you went out of your room and sat on the couch, waiting.

'hey kid! when were patrolling—' he opened the bathroom door, half-dressed. '—when were patrolling, i can't have you callin' me dad or anything. im not trying to be mean, i just don't want you bombarded with reporters anytime you step foot out of the apartment, alright?' he held a thumbs up to you.

'so...would that mean i need a hero name?' you stretched, some of your muscles popping and cracking. hawks snapped his fingers.

'i forgot about that. how about we call you (hero name) for now, alright?' hawks threw his jacket on, his wings getting caught. finally, he pulled them through, out on full display. you've always wanted to touch your fathers wings, but they were probably sensitive so you scratched that off your list.

'hey, grab your backpack. after patrolling, ill get more stuff so we can make tacos tonight, deal?' your dad threw you your backpack and you put it on.

'ah, thank you hawks.' you smiled and hawks looked back at you, surprised.

'i-im just getting the hang of it! i don't wanna slip up when were out there, s-so....' you trailed off. hawks laughed and lifted you onto his back.

'ready to fly, kid?'

'....wha-what!?' and with that, hawks jumped out of the window with you on his back, soaring through the sky to his hero agency.

once you two got to his hero agency, he let you down as you both reached his office and went in. you felt like you were almost gonna throw up you were so dizzy. once you got inside, you had to stable yourself on your fathers desk. hawks checked the clock behind his desk.

'alright kid, we just have to wait for ts—' hawks was ultimately cut-off by a boy with a ...bird for a head..!? running in.

'a-am i late?' he looked at hawks worriedly and shook his head no. the bird boy looked at you, and then hawks, and back to you.

'who is this?' he pointed to you and hawks laughed, putting a hand on your back.

'this is my kid, (first name), though their hero name is (hero name).' you blushed out of embarrassment and held out a hand. tsukuyomi shook it and looked back at hawks.

'so, you have a...child?'

'yup, rescued em from that big league of villians attack and they've been stuck with me ever since!' hawks laughed.

'nice to meet you, uh shouldn't we get going..?' you smiled at tsukuyomi and then you turned to your father.

'oh, yeah we should. follow me!' hawks grabbed you and sat you on his back again. you soared through the city once more with tsukuyomi trailing behind. once you 3 got to the destination, hawks set you down and tsukuyomi fell down, his quirk...speaking to you.

'your (hero name), right!? im dark shadow, to- i meaaan tsukuyomis quirk aka best friend!' once the quirk spoke, tsukuyomi shooed it away and assured you that it would not happen again. you smiled as hawks rushed you guys for patrol.

'i...i think im dying.' you were holding onto tsukuyomis shoulder as the three of you took a break. your legs felt like jello after walking and running all day, seriously, how does he do it? hawks was ultimately bombarded with fans once you two stepped foot in the shade.

'ah, we will only have to patrol a little while longer. do not worry.' tsukuyomi pat your hand in comfort as you whined and whined into his shoulder. you guys saw what looked to be like a reporter come up to you both.

'tsukuyomi! may i ask you some questions regarding this rare event?' the reporter held her microphone up to tsukuyomi and waited patiently. tsukuyomi looked at you and you just stumbled away, leaving tsukuyomi to answer questions. you rounded a nearby corner and sitting in the shade away from everyone. you sighed heavily, grabbing your backpack and drinking some water that was inside.

then there was you. you and you alone, sitting in the shade while hawks and tsukuyomis fans walked right past you.

'jeez, is this really what he does every day?' you groaned and got up, ready to face the hoard of people. suddenly, someone bumped into you and you fell. hard. you groaned as the green-haired boy panicked and went up to you. he held out a hand, you took it and he pulled you up, letting go.

'i-i am so sorry! are you hurt!?' the green haired boys face was flushed with embarrassment and you laughed.

'no no, i am quite alright, haha..' you looked away from the boy, scratching the back of your head.

'ah thats a relief, sorry again!' he bowed and scurried off to where hawks and tsukuyomi were. you followed behind and when you got there, the crowd was more bigger than when you weren't there. you saw hawks doing multiple things at once and tsukuyomi talking to various reporters. tsukuyomi spotted you, said what looked like a 'sorry' to the person he was talking to and walked over to you.

'there you are.' he placed his hands on your shoulders.

'i was looking all over for you, you had me worried.' tsukuyomi gave you a dissaproving look.

's-sorry tsuku, i was just around the corner away from the crowd was all. sorry i made you worr—' you were cut off by your arms getting pulled and tsukuyomi looking at the jackets torn up elbows.

'ah, what happened? did you fall? are you hurt?' tsukuyomi looked all over for more injuries, but you just calmed him down. you could tell all the reporters were probably looking at you two.

'im fine, someone just bumped into me and i fell. im not hurt or anything.' you reassured him and put your hands on his shoulders, like he did with you.

'hey, wanna see if i can get hawks to let you stay over to have tacos with us?'

'..tacos? ive never had one, but id be willing to try one.'

'you've NEVER had a taco before!? you're missing out on the best food ever!' you shook tsukuyomi so hard that he was dizzy afterwards. you heard footsteps coming towards you two and you looked up.

...

'are you two dating or something? cuz my friends just found our new hero OTP!' the fangirl squealed at you two and you froze, blushing from embarrassment.

...

what?

'...uhm..? d-dating..? n-no no, we are just friends. besides we have only met today..' tsukuyomi looked away from you and the fangirl. you looked at her up and down and then looked at hawks, who noticed you and immediately walked over.

'sorry about that you two, have to speak with the fans, you know?' hawks put a hand on both your shoulders and glanced at the fangirl who squealed and ran away.

'did that girl give you guys any trouble?' hawks looked at you two sternly.

'no we're fine. are you still up for tacos?' you scratched the back of your head awkwardly and hawks nodded.

'oh um, actually,' both your heads snappes to tsukuyomi who looked nervous. '(hero name) was wondering if i could have..tacos with you guys?'

hawks laughed. 'of course you can, luckily we already have the ingredients. alright, lets get out of here. im starving!' hawks picked you up and tsukuyomi got dark shadow on fly-mode or whatever it was and you three went and flew to your guys' house.

you ran into the kitchen, changed from your sweaty jacket to a tanktop and shorts. you saw tokoyami—whos name you learned while flying— sitting where you slept and your dad cooking.

'hey, yours is ready.' hawks held up a plate which had 2 (small/big), (underfilled/overfilled) tacos on it. you grab it, thanking your dad and you shifted over to the couch, sitting next to tokoyami. you almost devoured the two tacos by the time your dad sat next to you.

'jeez, did you even taste them?' he laughed as he handed tokoyami his tacos.

'yeah, and they were good!' you laughed also and got up, putting your plate in the trash. you washed your hands and yawned. you checked the clock.

'holy shi- smokes! its almost 20:00! tokoyami, don't you have school in the morning!?' you looked at tokoyami, who looked panicked as he dried his hands.

'oh, yes i do have school in the morning. thank you for reminding me, takami. (hawks last name is takami so ykyk) im afraid i have to go now.' he quickly got his shoes on and waved goodbye to you both.

'i hope you will join us next patrol.' tokoyami smiled at you and left. your dad elbowed you.

'you and tokoyami, ey?' he snickered.

'b-be quiet dad!' you shoved him and fell down on the couch, laughing.

'love you dad, goodnight.' you closed your eyes and put the blanket over you. your dad kissed your forehead.

'love you too kid.'

(very sorry that this seems rushed! i really wanted to get this one done because i have an oc exactly like this but his dad is present mic lol)

[astridlaufeydottir]

Connor Rhodes x OC(Astrid Halstead)

Based on season 4 episode 20.

Summary: Connor's wife is 39 weeks pregnant and an ER attending. What happens when someone start shooting in the ER?

"Morning Maggie" I said as I entered the ER.

"Morning, Dr Rhodes! Feel up for a patient?" She asked smiling at me.

"Sure, I need something to pass the time and not think about peeing all the time" I reply laughing at my condition. Being 39 weeks pregnant and working in the ER makes it hard not to pee every 10 minutes.

"Treatment 4, here" she said, handing me the tablet.

"HI there! Lily right? I see here you're 38 weeks?"

"Yes"

"I'm dr Rhodes. 39 weeks" I said smiling at her, thinking that will cheer her up. "Family?"

"I'm her father, Joseph Cooper, this is Edie Thompson" the man replied

"I'm not part of the family-"

"She's adopting my baby" my patient said, clearing the situation.

"I see, well if your father and Edie wouldn't mind stepping outside, I'm going to do a pelvic exam, okay? Let me know if anything hurts"

She nodded her head while her father and Edie walk out. I checked her cervix and she was 2 cm dilated already, when I saw her wince in pain.

"Anything hurts?"

"I'm fine."

"Well you're 2 cm dilated already and by the looks of it you're also having contractions"

"Then make it stop!"

"I'm afraid I can't do that once the baby is full term, Lily."

"I don't care! I scheduled a c-section. I sleep, wake up and he's gone!"

I nodded head at her and before I could say anything, another person came in the room.

"Lily?"

"David you can't be here!"

I stepped outside to give them some privacy, but after only 5 minutes Maggie had to call security. I decided to go upstairs to talk to OB about her situation.

"Good news, Lily. The OB will schedule a c-section today. We'll get you up as soon as a bed clears. Excuse me"

After I excused myself, I went to check on April's patient, since Dr Choi had to take care of another.

As me and April were checking the boy, we heard yelling outside, but didn't payed any attention since probably it was the same man from before. That was until we heard gunshots and people yelling at each other.

April was checking what was going, while I was frantically trying to calm the little boy.

"April what's wrong?" I asked as soon as I saw her pale face.

"Was that a gunshot?!" The kid asked, scared out of his mind.

"Astrid...Dr Rhodes has his hand in someone's chest..and a gun pointed at him"

I'm sorry what? A gun? At Connor?

"Connor?" I almost yelled and went to go out and check on him, but April caught me before I walk out the door.

"HEY! Hey! Calm down! Stay put! Keep quiet, he doesn't know we're in here!" She whispered when suddenly the boy couldn't breath.

"Sats going down, he's not breathing"

I checked his lungs, looked like one of his lungs couldn't function properly.

"April, he needs a chest tube"

She handed everything I needed and managed to place the chest tube while she bagged him. We got to stabilize him for the moment.

"Astrid, your legs!"

I looked down and saw my scrubs wet. That could onlyean one thing. "My water broke." At this time I was hyperventilating, I was about to give birth, Connor was God knows where, a lunatic had a gun, Code Silver in the ER.

"HEY! Deep breaths! Everything is going to be fine, okay?"

After breathing with April, I started to calm down. Until I saw my brother Will, covering the windows with bedsheets. Will was here too?!

"WILL?!"

"Astrid? What the hell are you still doing here? You should've been outside by now!"

"April needed my help with her patient..but now my water broke"

"What? Now?!"

"Listen to me, don't tell Connor! I know he's here too, he has a patient with a GSW"

"HEY! What the hell are you doing? Who's there?" Shit! It was the shooter. Before anyone could say something, I saw Connor pushing his patient out and I hid behind the curtains so he couldn't see. That was the last thing he needed right now. I breathed out a long puff of air, mostly relieved he got to sent the person to the OR, but the first contraction hit me already.

"HEY you! Move!" He shouted at Will, but he didn't move. He was looking at me, not knowing what to do. The shooter came inside and forcefully grabbed my arm. I yelped in pain and fear, while April and Will started shouting at him to let me go.

"If you don't shut up, I'll shoot her!"

"Alright, I'll do everything you need, just don't hurt my baby" I said and put a hand on my belly.

"My girlfriend needs a c-section and that doctor is the only one who can. Convince him!" He pushed towards treatment 2 and I realized that Connor's dad got there earlier. Fuck, this got complicated by the minute.

"D-Dr Rhodes?" I asked as soon as he pushed me inside, while holding the gun to my head. It came out barely audible, but Maggie heard me. As soon as she turned around and saw me, she went pale.

"Connor, turned around slowly" she said to my husband. He raised his hands and turned around slowly, but as soon as he saw me, he dropped the paddles that he still held.

"Astrid?!"

"Connor, you have to do a c-section!"

"I'm not doing anything until he let's you and my father go!" He yelled and I jumped a little, never seeing him this angry.

"Operate on Lily or I'll kill her right here!"

Before I could say anything, Maggie noticed my legs.

"Connor her legs"

When he looked down he could see that my scrubs were still wet.

"Listen, I'm gonna help Lily, but you have to let my wife go and let me move my father to the OR"

"Okay, okay" The shooter pushed me into Maggie and she quickly got a hold of me.

"Hey, babe? Listen to me, you'll be fine, okay? Maggie will help until I finish and then I'll come back, okay?"

"Okay, Okay" I breathed out and yelled as I felt another contraction.

"Astrid, hey! Let's get to on the bed and see what's going on"

She checked my cervix and I could see she was trying to keep calm for me.

"Whats wrong, Maggie?!"

"Nothing, it's fine. You're 8 cm dilated and you'll have to start pushing soon"

"What? No. No, I'm not doing this without Connor"

"I understand, but you have to. It won't be long, okay? I promise, Astrid."

Half an hour later, Maggie propped my legs up and said I was fully dilated.

"Maggie I can't do this!"

"Listen to me, you can and you will, okay?" She said and then I saw a familiar face behind her.

"Hey, what's going on here? Connor sent me to check on you. He's almost done there" Will said and closed the door behind him.

"I'm not going to give birth with my brother in here!"

"Astrid, I'm a doctor. Maggie will need help and besides..I promis, if you poop I will not make fun of you"

"Wha- Poop? Maggie am I going to poop?!"

"No, no! That could happen, but not all woman poop during birth, so it's okay. You're fine, but you need to start pushing"

"AAHHH! HE'S NOT GONNA TOUCH ME AGAIN AFTER THIS" I yelled in pain after pushing for 10 minutes.

"This is fun to watch" Will said laughing.

"WILL, IF YOU DON'T SHUT UP, I WILL BUTTHEAD YOU"

"I'm here, I'm here" Connor said rushing inside.

"Thank God you're here, but if you do this to me again, I will totally kill you, Rhodes"

"I know , I know. I love you, you're doing great"

"Astrid I need you push hard with your next contraction, okay? I can see the baby's head" Maggie said encouraging me.

"Cone on, baby, you're doing great, just push. It's almost over "

Between Connor's voice, my yelling and Maggie's instructions, we heard a tiny cry and everything stopped.

"Congrats you two, you have a beautiful baby boy" Maggie said putting the tiny baby on my chest.

"It's a boy?" I said crying.

"Dr Rhodes will you cut the cord?" She asked Connor, and that was the first time his surgeon hands were shaking.

After me and baby Rhides were cleaned, Connor sat with us on the bed. "He's so little" he said while playing with baby's hand.

"Didn't felt little coming out" I said laughing

"Hey, can I see my nephew now?" Will asked, only his head visible behind the door.

"Come here, Will"

"Hey sis? You really did pooped" I Gasped. I did what now?

"Seriously Halstead?! You couldn't shut up?" Connor was lecturing him.

"You saw too?"

"It's fine babe, woman poop all the time"

"It's not that! It's the fact that you two saw! I hate you both!"

We all started laughing. Connor and Will took turns holding the baby while waiting for out other friends to come visit. Maybe a good thing came out, after all this mess.

[technowoah]

Revolutions Always Fall

You should've learned from L'Manburg. The Butcher Gang was a mistake.

- REQUESTED!

- I tried to put 2 requests in one here.

- its really long 🤧🤞🏽

Prompts!

13) "You made me lose all my faith and trust in you"

38) "They warned me about this.” “About what?” “You.” 

47)“Are you satisfied now...?”

⚠︎ memtions of blood, voilence, fighting, swearing, Technoblade's execution episode. Angst.

Masterlist!

Dear Technoblade,

I wont make the same mistakes again

- an old friend. ♤

Technoblade was always a threat, and you learned that from L'Manburg. You had befriended him when he joined Pogtopia and very quickly you two seemed to click. He saw the world through different eyes and that intrigued you. You wanted to be him, live life the way he does it for just a day.

He was a killing machine, he was smart tactical, but still had the thirst for blood that made him be so smart and tacitcal with how he kills.

You on the other hand were not a big fan of killing, but this war was an exception. This war made you practice, it made you angry, it lit a fire underneath you that you didnt know you had. Along with the other members of Pogtopia, Technoblade helped you fight, how to wield a sword, knife, gun, anything that you can get your hands on you turned it into a weapon, you Soon enough you had mastered weapons and you werent so passive.

You questioned yourself if this was living through Technoblade, the need to fight, hunt, to protect. You felt poweful. As you hold your own crafted swords in your hand you know what you can do. You could do so much damage with this sword, he gave you that sword. It wasn't special at all but you made it special, because in your eyes it was.

"You can do so much with a sword, people just don't know how to use it to its fullest potential. They dont know their full potential either. But now you do."

Thats what he said to you in between those stone walls called Pogtopia.

After what he said to you had done so. Used the sword to your full potential, used anything to your full potential. You wanted to be more and more you became.

"You ready?" Technoblade smirked.

"Hell yeah Im ready to kill that bastard." You smiled

"Woah-oh! You weren't saying this a couple months ago."

"Schlatt deserves it. That's not L'Manburg. This is L'Manburg." You stretched out your arms to the others who were gathering armor and polishing their weapons for the battle yet to come.

You smiled knowing this will all end soon, you wouldn't be in a cave anymore, you wouldn't have to hide the fact that you knew where Wilbur was and that he was planning the attack, Pogtopia will be no more and L'Manburg would be back.

"L'Manburg will be back." You said while taking a sword out of a chest.

"Sure." You heard him scoff beside you.

"What's that supposed to mean?" You asked slightly offended. Wasn't he fighting for the same thing?

"I dont know. Revolutions always fall." He turned his back to you and walked away leaving you to your own thoughts.

You hated it. He was right, he was always right and you hated it. And everyone else did too, they knew he was right. It wasnt what the majority wanted, we wanted L'Manburg while he didn't want to be held by government in the first place. That's what he meant that day in Pogtopia.

L'Manburg, one defeated, was now growing once more. After the "end" of L'Manburg you couldn't forgive him. Your anger and the feeling of betrayal kept growing and growing everyday, every time you picked up that damned sword he gave you. It was the best sword you had, you had enchanted it multiple times. You had to use it, but the only thing was the memories that came with it.

Your anger only worsened as time went on, having to hear about Technoblade and how he was such a threat to L'Manburg only made you want to destroy him and the past you two had created. That would be the closure you needed, but someone was already three steps a head of you.

In spite of your anger you and Quackity had the most magnificent idea to make a gang to finally kill Technoblade for the sake of L'Manburg. The idea was to go confront him at his house and take him back to L'Manburg for an execution. You were on board with the idea 100%. This was better for L'Manburg and better for yourself, finally someone who got you.

Quackity and you planned tirelessly to try and get Technoblade's location and bring him back. The Butcher Gang was made from the cabinet of L'Manburg. During these long days you two grew closer, you two were so different in ways of thinking, but you two shared the same end goal which worked out in your favor. You two went through hell and back just to find out that the easiest way to get to Technoblade was sitting in L'Manburg right at that moment. Philza, some may say Technoblade's only friend at the moment. He was loyal to Technoblade and you dont blame him at all, but you needed to find out where his companion was.

It was all going well, the Butcher Gang had put Phil on house arrest and Tubbo had found a compass that led them straight to Technoblade's location. Everything was going well and according to plan, you didnt want to show it on your face as you saw Technoblade's house from the spot in the woods the Butcher Gang was hiding in, but you wanted this so badly. You didnt where he was going to be, he could've came and bestowed more destruction. It was like knowing he was there, but not knowing when he was going to strike.

The anxiety that came with not knowing where Technoblade was always with you, but now it wont be.

The Butcher Gang ended up taking Technoblade by force back into the city. You were proud that you were all able to get the blood hungry pig-man to come back with you all. He was behind bars with an anvil hanging high over his head. As Tubbo gave his speech your short lived happiness soon faded as a man appeared and smoke filled the area. You started to get attacked by what seemed like Dream and Punz while Tubbo continued to yell for Quackity to pull the lever to finally kill Technoblade.

"Pull the lever Big Q!"

"Kill him Quackity!" You yelled with him.

He did it. The anvil fell fast towards Technoblade's body, but as fast as the anvil landed on him his skin, bones, and blood regenerate and return to its normal state. Your eyes widened as the totem in his hand began to disintegrate into gold dust.

"DAMMIT!" You yelled in agony while Ranboo and Fundy continued to fend off Dream and Punz until they retreated.

Once they did you realized Technoblade was gone, you saw him in the distance running away from the scene, but you couldn't let this happen. You couldn't let the fear of Technoblade being out there doing God knows what forever. The fear of him boiled in your heart as you broke out into a sprint towards Technoblade.

As you ran into a more secluded area you heard footsteps behind you. You glances back to see Quackity following your lead with an axe in his hand. Slowing down a bit you both ran side by side.

"Let's get this son of a bitch!" Quackity huffed as you both came across a cave.

You both knew Technoblade was in there so you both prepared for the mental and physical pain you would both endure. This wasn't like the Butcher Gang where it was 5 against 1, it was 2 against 1 and you've seen Technoblade fight this fight before.

"You ready to kill this bastard?" He calmed his breathing down.

"Of course I am." You kept your eyes foward.

You walked deep into tha cave to see 6 chests and a sign that said "final control room", that bastard. Wanting to be quiet you tried to sneak up on Technoblade, but Quackity's anger got the best of him.

"What the fuck is this Technoblade?! What the hell are you doing here?" He asked gripping his sword too tight.

"It not what it looks like." Technoblade airly laughed. He had an enchanted pickaxe in his hand and an open chest with netherite armor.

"How the hell did that anvil not kill you?!" Quackity yelled.

Technoblade started laughing, he was laughing, he was taunting us. "Do you really think that death can stop me? That you could kill me that easily."

Your emotions tried to get the best of you as you tried not to let frustrated tears fall onto your cheeks.

"How did you do it? What... How did you even do that?"

"You think that can stop me Quackity?" Technoblade asked again.

"Just answer the fucking question!" You yelled before either of them could speak. It was silent for a while before Technoblade slowly spoke up.

"A totem. I used a totem of undying. I always have it on me." He smugly said.

He continued on. "You know what?! You know what? Ive got a lot to say, I was gonna say it at the trial, but we got a little bit interrupted. You know I tried convincing you guys that government was not the answer, the government was actually the cause of all your problems!"

You rolled your eyes as he continued his infamous speech.

"I tried to convince you guys by fighting alongside you as brothers and you cast me aside, you used me. I tried to use force, but you still formed a government! And when I went into hiding, when I retired, when I swore off violence, you hunted me down, you hurt my friends." Technoblade finished.

"Techno you dont understand what we're fighting for!" You started finally finding your voice. "I thought you were for us! You were always against us!"

"I was always for you! I needed you guys to understand!"

"We needed YOU to under-"

Technoblade interrupted you. "You dont understand me! You never did!"

"At least I fucking tried and you gave me so much shit for it! I wanted to be you Technoblade. I wanted to see life through your eyes, I was fascinated by how you walk, fight, your mind."

Your anger began to subside as you continued to speak. "But, you made me lose all my faith and trust in you."

Technoblade laughed again. "Same here! You guys left me! Betrayed me so-"

"So the feeling is mutual." You growled.

It was quite for a minute, but you could feel Quackity's sympathetic stare as you poured your feelings out to a man who dosen't even matter to you.

"They warned me about this." Your arms gestured to the area the three of you were in.

"About what?" Technoblade scoffed.

"About you." You stared at Technoblade. It wasn't a glare, it was more calm.

"Quackity, Tubbo, Fundy...Even Ranboo." You airly chuckled.

You had stopped talking trying to get yourself back together. Quackity caught that you weren't talking anymore so he spoke up.

"What we have up there is a country and what we need here is organization and power. And I dont care how long it fucking takes me or what I have to do to get you Techno. Im going to fucking kill you. Im going to kill you Technoblade." Quackity gripped his axe in his hand.

"I just have one question Quackity." Techno smirked.

"What do you have?" Quackity responded and you took the sword out of the sheath hanging on your hip.

"Do you think you two are enough to kill me? Even unarmed with iron armor?" Technoblade closed the chest that held netherite armor signaling he didn't need that. "Do you think you both could take me?"

"Oh we do." You spoke up. "We need this, Technoblade."

"You know what?" Quackity rose his axe and you followed suit. "Lets find out you son of a bitch!" He charged towards Technoblade and you followed close behind.

Technoblade started running out of the long cave, but you two followed. He threw potions on the ground as he turned around and fought us head on. You were able to get a couple of cuts and hits on him, but he was cutting you more with his pickaxe.

The thing about Quackity was that he thought he was invincible. He kept going full force towards Technoblade, hopefully he would focus on him so you could finally get a critical hit on him. Your heart rate kicked up as your face came too close to his pickaxe. And it kept going, each swing he took towards you became closer and closer until Quackity slashed his arm with his axe.

Technoblade whipped his head his way. "I have a pickaxe and I'll put it right through your teeth!"

Technoblade swung his axe and slashed Quackity's face, including his eye. He then turned his pickaxe to the flat side and swung it, hitting the side of his head. The blow to his head sent him flying against one of the walls of the cave, knocking him out.

He then turned to you and in a flash you could tatse the metal of his pickaxe as it swiped across your face blinding one of your eyes as well as Quackity's. He had hit you on the side of the head like he did with Quackity. Your body was aching as you fell to the ground, your mind slowly shutting down. You were loosing a lot of blood quickly, and so was Quackity. You two knew you were going to find the strength to get out of this cave and follow Technoblade's path out.

You laid on the cave's cold floor realizing that this was a mistake. You were too loyal, easily swayed, you were a follower. You never knew when to stop, from L'Manburg to Pogtopia to The Butcher Gang you seeked things you couldn't have. You couldn't have L'Manburg, neither Pogtopia, you couldn't kill Technoblade and ease your fears snd anxieties. You need to seek that some where else.

Your mind began to slip, and you fell into unconsciousness.

You should've learned. He was right. Revolutions always fall.

The Butcher Gang was a mistake.

Dear Technoblade,

I remembered the day. It still pains me. The day you spawned those wither. I thought you were the traitor, but turns out I was wrong at the time. Im sorry for that.

I also remember when you left me for dead. But I made it out as you see.

But now I am resigning from L'Manburg. Im going my own way, my own path, and I don't want you on my path.

Think of this as closure, something I never got. As I am writing this I dont know why I am giving you closure, lifting a weight off of your shoulders, you dont deserve it.

I know people say that to you alot.

You really made a dent in this damned place.

I hate what you're doing. You get to live in solitude while we get to live in the debris you left here. I wanted to be like you.

I hate to say it, but I learned a lot from you. I hated what I learned, about myself, about you, about the current state of this horrible place.

I wont make the same mistakes again

Are you satisfied now?

- an old friend ♤

[alirhi]

part 5 - both yikes and yay

Coming up on the end, guys! I'm both relieved and sad. While the previous two installments weren't as easy as the first two, this overall has been pretty fun. Well, anyway, no one's here for my pre-show ramblings lol. Let's get to it!

Episode 5: Truth

Oh. Lord. There are things I love about this episode. Walker's whining, blame-deflecting rant is not one of them. Nor is his inability to take any responsibility for his actions.

Bucky swinging Walker around like a hammer is, though. 😂

Sam wiping blood off the shield with his hand? 🤮 Nope. And they really yadda-yadda'd him being allowed to just...walk away with a high-profile murder weapon?

Right. Rewrite for Bucky, not critique whole show. Focus, Ali.

Since Zemo's already taken care of, Bucky meets up with Ayo to make sure they're still good. He reiterates that neither he nor Sam had anything to do with Zemo escaping prison, and apologizes for not sending him right back as soon as they saw him. "Was it worth it, White Wolf?" He shrugs and reluctantly admits, "He did save our lives a couple of times. And the private plane helped. Just tell me he's rotting somewhere he can't get out of this time." "He's being taken to the Raft as we speak," she assures him with a smile. "Hopefully his stay there will be much longer." "Listen, I called because I have a favor to ask you..."

While Sam talks to Isaiah and goes home to work on the boat, Bucky goes to see Raynor. He'd left his burner phone at home, so he doesn't see until he gets back to Brooklyn that she'd tried to get in touch with him. "You called a couple times," he mumbles, fiddling with the phone. "I did." "Sorry. Been a busy week." Raynor chuckles and shakes her head. "Per Cap's orders, you're not on a strict schedule with me anymore. I was just checking in to see how you're doing." He shrugs. "Like I said, busy." "Any nightmares?" At that, he smirks a little. "You think I slept?" She laughs. "Flashbacks?" "No, I'm good." "You're such a bad liar, James." She grins, pointing at him. "It's those big blue anime eyes. They give everything away. So, let's talk about your most recent nightmare." "I didn't have any. I told you, I barely slept-" "Flashback, then. Something's weighing on you." Bucky frowns. "You know, not everything's about my past, Doc. In case you missed it, there's been some crazy stuff going on in the here and now that can 'weigh on you.'" With false sympathy, Raynor sighs and picks up the notebook. "You're never truly free of the horrors of your past, James. All this running around chasing terrorists concerns me. With what you did before, I'm worried this can be very triggering. I need to make sure you're not putting yourself or anyone around you in any danger. I mean, god forbid you snap and hurt Sam-" "I wouldn't," he's quick to assure her, though he looks nervous and doubtful. "Those days are over." He keeps looking at the notebook and fidgeting, visibly trying not to freak out. Raynor smiles and sets it aside. "That's for me to decide. If you want me to sign off that you're perfectly safe, you need to open up, James." "About what?" "Whatever's bothering you. No matter what it is. I've seen this kind of instability before; the smallest thing can trigger regression." Bucky flinches, staring somewhat sullenly at the window. He hates talking to this bitch, but if he might be a danger to Sam... "Alright, fine. I had one... moment. In Madripoor. But it wasn't a big deal." Raynor's smile widens. "Go on." "Zemo pulled this stunt, and it got me thinking about when HYDRA used the Winter Soldier-" "You mean you?" she prods. Bucky frowns, but nods. "Never forget, James. It's not 'The Winter Soldier' - it's you. These are things you did while you were working for HYDRA. Disassociating isn't healthy." He sighs. "Right." Smile returning, Raynor settles back in her seat. "Now... what did Zemo remind you of?" "When the mission was blackmail, not a kill order..."

Cut to Sam and his neighbors talking about getting that boat part off the truck, and a visibly disgruntled Bucky moving it for them.

While they work on the boat together, Sam segues from the topic of Karli into the things he's wanted to bring up over the course of their chase. He starts with the most troubling: "What did you mean by 'wouldn't be the first time'?" Bucky winces, refusing to look at him. "Huh? When?" "Don't play dumb with me, Buck. In Riga, you said-" "Yeah, I know what I said, Sam!" Bucky snaps. "It's nothing. Just drop it." "It's not nothing! What the hell were you talking about?" "You really need clarification?" he practically snarls. "You got the implications behind what Zemo was doing. What did you think I meant?" Sam cringes. "I didn't realize HYDRA moonlighted as a brothel." Bucky snorts and gets back to work. "For enough money or if it scored the right leverage, they had no problem exploring any use of their programming." He shakes his head, mumbling, "They kept tapes. That's how Stark found out about his parents; HYDRA knew Howard's schedule and they set up a camera... They did that a few times, on different types of missions." "Why?" "Advertising, in case anyone wanted to rent a killer," he grumbles, finally turning to look at Sam. He's hiding it the best he can, but there's anguish in his eyes. "And to make sure I always knew who I belonged to. So I'd stop fighting back." He clears his throat and looks away, pretending to concentrate on what he's doing with the boat. "It's hard to want freedom when you're constantly reminded that its price is remembering all the horrible things you've done. The freezing, the electroshock, the trigger words... It all made the memories just... fall away. For a little while. If I started resisting before I could remember details, they sat me down for my greatest hits." Sam lays a hand on Bucky's, waiting for him to look up again. "And you still think you're responsible?" "I did it, didn't I?" "'Under duress' doesn't even begin to cover it! Jesus, Buck! They had complete control over you - The Winter Soldier wasn't you, it was HYDRA's cyborg weapon!" "What difference does-" "If you were evil," Sam growls, "if you were a crazed mass murderer who had no issue killing whoever they told you to, do you think they'd have to go to such insane lengths to make you do it?! That wasn't you. You are not responsible for what HYDRA used your body to do when they stripped away and shoved down everything that made you you." He's not getting through. Sam's logic still isn't strong enough to break through Bucky's guilt, especially not with Raynor's toxic "therapy" shoring it up. Seeing the stubborn refusal to believe him in Bucky's eyes, Sam sighs and gets back to work. To keep Bucky from breaking, he mutters, "So, the staring problem. Did they create that, or fail to correct it?" "Bite me, pigeon." Bucky grins, still shaken and hurting, but grateful for the banter.

When Sam invites him to spend the night and Bucky finally gets some sleep, he has another nightmare. No flashback for details this time, but he jolts awake when he hears Sarah's kids playing and is a little rattled and disoriented for a second before he gets his bearings. Then he sees the boys and we get the pretty, pretty smile and the soft, pensive look.

credit: @msbeliever05 found on google

While he's holding the crow bar in place for Sam, Bucky quietly admits, "You know, it doesn't even have to be the right words. Sometimes just hearing someone speak Russian terrifies me." "That's understandable," Sam assures him. "Everything they did to you, didn't it all happen in Russia?" "Most of it, yeah. That bunker in Siberia basically houses all of my worst nightmares. I was thinking this morning..." He glances toward the house. "What if something happens and I hurt someone? Hurt them?" "You won't." Sam's tone is kind, but firm and leaves no room for argument. "No one can make you hurt anyone you don't want to again, Buck. You're free." "Am I?" The look on Bucky's face is so sad; so lost and devoid of hope. "My life... doesn't feel all that different. My family's gone, my only friend is gone... People either don't see me or they shrink from me. I'm still a ghost." "Yeah, well, now you get to choose who to haunt." Sam shrugs, managing a tiny, half-hearted smile. "It's a start, right?" Bucky chuckles; it's just as weak as Sam's smile, but he's trying. "Is that what I'm doing here? Haunting you?" "Better me than my sister." He grins, and this time it mostly reaches his eyes. "If I'd known you were interested, I'd have made a move on Zemo's plane." Sam gapes at him, expression an odd mix of shocked, amused, and extremely uncomfortable. "That is not what I meant!" Laughing, Bucky moves past him, patting his ass on his way by. "So, no Wilson-Barnes sandwich? Damn. There goes the only good dream I had last night." "Quit making it weird!" Sam sputters, but he's laughing, too. It's obvious Bucky's joking. They get back to work, still laughing and joking around.

Hoo boy. And now we come to The Moment.

"The legacy of that shield is...complicated, to say the least." "When Steve told me what he was planning, I don't think either of us really understood what it felt like for a black man to be handed the shield. How could we? I owe you an apology. I'm sorry." Sam sighs as he takes the shield back. "Thank you." There's a brief, somewhat awkward silence while both men collect their thoughts. Then Sam speaks again. "I can't help wondering still if it's even worth it. I mean, for every Steve Rogers..." He nods to Bucky. "There's a Bucky Barnes. There's someone getting used and abused and hidden away like a dirty secret to make way for this bright, shining symbol. People want Captain America to be perfect and untarnished, but they don't see all the blood spilled to make way for him." Bucky snorts. "Trust me, I know. I was the sniper at his back keeping him from getting his reckless star-spangled head blown off." "Nah." Sam shakes his head. "You're not listening. I'm not talking about what you did, I'm talking about what was done to you. Man, you still don't even see it, do you?" "See what?" "It wasn't your fault." He stares Bucky down, trying to get him to see the truth. "None of it. You were captured, tortured, experimented on... Reduced to a code name because it wasn't enough to strip away your autonomy, they didn't even want you to have an identity." Bucky looks away, not sure what to say to any of this. "You're not a villain, Buck," Sam assures him quietly. "You're an Avenger." "The Avengers are heroes," Bucky protests, scowling. "You save lives. All I did was take them." "We try," he says with a smile and a little shrug, "Sometimes we fail pretty hard, but we try. And so do you. Are you really gonna stand there, after all the times you've had my back, had Steve's back, stood for what's right, even when it would have been so much easier to cut your losses and run, and tell me you're not a hero? Man, I'd throw this thing at your head if I wasn't afraid it'd bounce off and hit me." "Do it," Bucky taunts. "Might knock some sense into you. If you think the Winter Soldier is a hero-" "Not the Winter Soldier," Sam interrupts, poking Bucky's chest. "You. James Bucky Barnes. Cap is gone, but he wasn't the only hero this world had." He smirks. "You just gotta pull your head out of your ass and quit wallowing. Make yourself useful." With a weak attempt at a laugh, Bucky pulls the tiny notebook out of his pocket. "That's what this is all about. I figured... If it worked for Steve, it'd work for me." Sam shakes his head again, frustrated. "Steve's list was all about acclimating to a whole new century. Pop culture and slang and whatever else. Your list? Those names? That's sick, Bucky. That's all about torturing yourself for seventy years worth of actions that weren't your fault to begin with. That's not gonna help you. And Steve's got nothing to do with it." "Yeah, well, Doctor Raynor thinks-" "Raynor?" He waves Bucky silent. "That sad excuse for a shrink that wasted our time and violated your privacy in Baltimore? Tell me you're not listening to that hack!" Bucky shrugs helplessly, looking lost again. "She's my therapist." "She's something," Sam growls, "but therapy's not involved. I don't know what her agenda is, or if she's just grossly incompetent, but if she's got you confronting HYDRA's victims, ripping open your wounds and theirs, that's not therapy. It's not healthy for anyone." Bucky's confused, not sure whether he agrees with Sam or not, and it shows when he weakly argues, "She's helping me cope with what I did; make amends for everything I did as the Winter Soldier. So that maybe I can finally have a life at the end of all this." "You gotta stop looking to other people to tell you who you are." (I fucking love that line! every time I watch this part, I'm like "go, Sam!" ...until the rest of his nonsensical, totally ooc speech, anyway.) "Let me ask you... You still having those nightmares?" "All the time," Bucky confirms with a wry twist of his mouth that can't even be called a smile. "It means I remember; means a part of

me's still there; means a part of the Winter Soldier is still in me." "No it doesn't," Sam snaps. "It means your brain works. Congratulations, you

have memory. That doesn't make you a monster. It makes you impressive, after all the damage your brain has sustained over the years, but not a monster. You up for a little 'tough love'?" "Isn't that what this whole conversation has been?" Sam chuckles, shrugs, and gets back on track. "You wanna climb out of that Hell you're in, do the work. Do it." Bucky holds up the notebook, confused again. "I have been-" "No, you've been wallowing and flogging yourself. I mean face your nightmares, your fears. Sit down and confront those memories and see them for what they are: trauma. Bucky, you're not a reformed operative. You're as much a victim of HYDRA as the people they used you to hurt. You wanna get better? You want a life, a light at the end of that tunnel? Face the darkness and see it for what it truly is. It's not sins to be repented and redeemed, it's PTSD." Touched, Bucky finally manages a real smile. "Good talk."

You know I'm not touching their cute banter as Bucky leaves 💗 So here is where we leave it.

[just-some-random-blogger]

One Million In One Day | 10 (Final)

GOT7 SugarDaddy!Jackson Wang x Reader + Park Jinyoung x Reader | Part 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 Characters: GOT7 Summary: His mother’s final wish is to see him be happy in a relationship, knowing that Jackson would be fine when she left him. But, damn, he didn’t have time for relationships, especially not since he was busy running his father’s billion dollar empire, thus the compromise: you. Word Count: <2k Warnings: Stalking, fighting, cursing, mentioning of illness, TYPOS, etc.

A/N: I literally said I was planning to finish this soon, but guess what HAHHAHAH THAT DIDN'T HAPPEN. I-- Anyway, to @tia-m94, @aquietkerfuffle SKSKSKS here it is. Also maybe actually listen to the song reader begged to play in this chappie lol

Dance, Dance by Fall Out Boy was going to be playing in the club. Why? Because I crawled over to the DJ and wept, begging him to play it. Why I was emotional about it: yes. I was just- yes. Y'know?

Yes.

It was why Nari, at that point, had disowned me. Also Mark, he disowned me too... although I don't actually remember if he was with us at this time.

I did remember where Jinyoung was though. I squint and looked out in the crowd for him.

I was wearing a sparkly violet dress and killer pumps, as in they were killing my feet. I was warned not to remove them though by the sour man watching me, over there with a sweater on and skinny jeans. Who wears sweaters in a dance club?

I mean it's fine, he was kinda cute. Like hecka cute. 10/10 cute you know. Would ask him out.

I finally spot him from where he sat in one of the tables by the bar. I wave at him. He sees me and waves back. I wipe the tears from my face and thank the DJ for promising to play the song for me and make my way to the cute man in a plain-ass lumpy sweater.

"What did the DJ say?" Jinyoung asks me, standing up from the stool and helping me sit.

"Well, first of all, I told him my boyfriend was really mean because he told me I couldn't take these uncomfortable shoes off."

Jinyoung sighs, "I told you to wear sneakers so we wouldn't have this conversation, but you insisted on 'looking hot.'"

I am offended by the air quotes he says.

"I so too am hot, you worthless piece of-" but my face is suddenly in his hands and my lips are being peppered by kisses. He lightly brushes his lips on mine and wipes he side of it, "Ye, ye, I didn't mean it like that, and you know it, pabo. You're absolutely stunning most of the time."

I blink, most-of-the-time doesn't sit right with me, but I'm not really sure why... "I feel like I should still fight with you."

Jinyoung chuckles then raises his brows and points, "Isn't that your song?"

I take a moment and listen. I then promptly freak out and nod. I instantly grab Jinyoung by the hand and drag him out. Once he's on his feet, he scolds, "up, up, up, up, up. What did we talk about earlier?"

I whine, "What is it this time?"

Jinyoung looks me in the eye, "after this song we...?"

I groan, "we go home! Ugh, what a party pooper."

"Just making sure we're on the same page, baby girl."

I make a face and poke Jinyoung's belly, "oooh, am I your baby girl?"

He chuckles and hums. He pulls his hand away from mine to place his arm around my shoulders, "More like shit-faced, childish adult."

I give him a look, "let's break up."

"Ah," he boops my nose, "when you're not under the influence, m'kay? For now, let's dance."

And so dance we did, if you think of flailing your arms and shaking your rump was dancing. But of course it is though.

Jinyoung, as exasperated as he was, actually enjoyed dancing with me, I think. I mean he seemed to be enjoying himself. He had his hands clenched and his arms folded, shaking as if he held two maracas. And I, when I wasn't head banging, I was lovingly looking at him.

"I'm glad that you're my boyfriend."

Jinyoung didn't seem to hear me because he just continues doing his dad-ish dancey-dance. I was about to say it again, but then his eyes catch something and he point at the direction, "Isn't that Jackson?"

"Jackson?" I scrunch my nose, "Jackson who?"

"Jackson Wang, babe. You're sugar daddy."

I take a moment to think about what he said. Jinyoung looks at me and raises a brow. He chuckles, "you're so shitfaced. Jackson's the one who bought us tickets to the Olympics? Got me a job in Seoul? Got you a job in Seoul?"

I wipe my nose, "Well, I know Michael Jackson."

Jinyoung sighs, "come on, let's say hi. Your song's almost over."

The next thing I know, Jinyoung's grabbing my hand and leading me off to the side.

Jackson, who had seen us, wasn't actually with anyone tonight. Bambam actually owned the club, and he had yet to show up. He found the dancing spectacle pretty amusing but there was a this thing in his chest, like something was biting his heart.

Oh fuck, they're coming over.

Jinyoung calls out. Jackson looks over and pulls on a smile, "Aye, Park Jinyoung." They do a bro shake.

I turn to the man in shade and wonder why he's wearing shades indoors, so I ask, "why are you wearing shades indoors?"

Jinyoung sighs. Jackson's lips part in thought, "they look cool?"

The sweater man shakes his head, "she's shitfaced. She cried over this song and doesn't remember who you are. You know know how she gets when she's drunk."

"I'm not drunk!"

Jackson clenches his fist, thinking, how do I still think she's cute when she doesn't remember me when she's drunk?

"Sure," Jinyoung says, turning to man sat alone in the booth, "you with anyone tonight, Seunie?"

I perk up, "Seunie's here?"

Jackson places his head in his hand and turns to Jinyoung, "I'm waiting for Bambam."

Jinyoung chuckles, "don't wait up."

Jackson laughs softly, "I'm giving him a few more minutes"

"That's what I said last time. Bam's excuse was so bad too."

"Stuck in traffic?"

"Stuck in traffic."

"Wait, where's Seunie?" I whine. Jinyoung looks at me and points, "there's your beloved Seunie."

Jackson freezes.

I turn to him and pout, "why are you wearing shades indoors?"

Jinyoung sighs. He takes my face in his hands and mouths slowly, "stay with Jackson. I need to pee."

"I don't need to pee though."

"Which is why you should stay with Jackson."

"But why?"

Jinyoung turns to Jackson and Jackson nods, "it's okay dude, I got it."

Jinyoung takes his leave.

Jackson moves closer, "so, Seunie?"

I turn to him and tilt my head, "Seunie?"

"He's your friend."

"He's my best friend. I love him."

Jackson clears his throat, "but you said you don't know who Jackson Wang is?"

"MmMmm, nope," I pop the p.

Jackson chuckles, "don't do that?"

"Do what?"

He takes a moment to respond. He mutters softly under his breath, "make me want to steal you away."

"Habudabibittiy-doo," I repeat his words.

Jackson sighs.

For a moment, I sit with shades guy in silence until he speaks up again, "He likes you a lot."

"Likes who?"

"You."

"Who likes me?"

"Jackson Wang."

I think for a moment, "Seunie?"

Jackson stills. He debates the consequences. He chuckles, knowing how bad these drunk episodes were. He clarifies the indifference in the question, "Yeah, I, Seunie, like you. So, so much."

"He said that?"

He nods, "he told me."

I blink and nod, "I like him too."

Jackson shakes his head. What a joke. He continues, "Jackson likes you in a way Jinyoung does, but sadder."

I pout my lips, "Sadder? I don't like it when Seunie is sad. He's sad because he misses his mom"

He pushes his shades up his forehead, "He's not sad about liking you like that. He's sad in a way he wants to be the one to bring you home when you're drunk and hold you when you sleep."

"He... felt like that?"

"He felt it when you went on dates, even though they were fake. He feels it until now."

I look at the man and see sadness in his eyes, "don't cry."

He gives a sad laugh, "I'm not sad, I'm happy for you. You glow when you're with him and he glows because of you. When we started hanging out with him, I thought he talked about you to grind my gears, but he just really loves you. I'm glad he does."

"Then why do you look like you're about to cry?"

"It still hurts."

"I'm back," Jinyoung suddenly said. He looks between us and says, "damn, you look like you're about to pass out, both of you."

Jackson clicks his tongue, "I'm tired of waiting from Bambam."

"Well, we're going home too. You need a ride?"

"Nah. I bought my car."

"Good. I really didn't feel like driving across the city for you."

Jackson rolls his eyes, chuckling, "same for you two."

"Not for her though, right? Anything for her," Jinyoung says, looking at Jackson with a smile, then to me, "come on, pabo." He turns around and gathers my arms. He bends down and pulls me up behind him.

"See you next week, Jackson," Jinyoung says. Jackson nods. They have a executive meeting tomorrow. Jinyoung was quickly rising above the ranks. As proud he felt, he felt a little jealous too. He really had not fault to him, huh?

He puts his shades back down and raises a glass, "I'll finish this one."

"Don't drink too much."

"Just the one."

He watches as Jinyoung walks away. He watches her nuzzle against him. He looks to his glass, "anything for her.

[megsironthrone]

Meg's Game of Tales: Tale 13

*Familiar Characters are NOT mine! The original tale of "The Snow Queen" was written by Hans Christian Andersen! As the story is actually 7 parts, I took inspiration from one particular part and a little from the Snow Queen episodes of OUAT.*

Warnings: The Snow Queen AU, magic. I think that's it.

Pairings: Jon Snow x fem!reader

Jon stifled a laugh as Arya glared at Theon defiantly. "You're lying! The Snow Queen doesn't take naughty children! Besides, I'm too old for children's stories. There's no such thing." For years, Theon liked to tease the younger Stark children with stories of the Snow Queen to scare them. It was only a story and Theon had changed it. Still, the real story was one of Jon's favorites. He had no idea that everything he thought he knew about the story was going to change.

*time skip*

The wind howled outside and the cold seeped through the stone walls of the holdfast. Even the fire roaring in the fireplace could only shut out the chill so much. It was the worst winter storm in years. "The Snow Queen is certainly angered tonight," Jon thought to himself then laughed, "It's a story, Jon. Nothing more."

He stopped at the mirror to check his face for injuries. Robb had gotten a bit aggressive during training as he was irritated at the prospect of having to remain indoors. When Jon gazed in the mirror, his brow furrowed. The mirror was cloudy. He used the sleeve of his tunic to wipe down the glass, jumping when he saw the reflection of a woman in the mirror. Jon whipped his head around to see an empty room behind. When he turned back, the reflection was gone.

As the dark-haired young man leaned closer to the mirror, he felt a chill run up his spine. Not the chill of a man suffering in the cold, but the chill of man who was frightened of something that had not even occurred yet. Cracks began to form in the mirror and an almost ethereal voice spoke. "You will see. You will be shown the true nature of people. You will see how they truly are and how they truly fell. And then you shall come to me. You shall rule by my side forever."

The mirror suddenly shattered, sending shards of glass flying at Jon's face. Jon closed his eyes, prepared to feel the stinging cuts, but none came. When he opened his eyes, the mirror was back to normal. There were no cracks to be seen and even the cloudiness was gone. Jon was confused, but shrugged it off after a moment. He went to bed feeling as though someone was watching him.

The next morning, Jon made his way down to breakfast with his family and stopped short. When he gazed upon the faces of everyone but the youngest Starks, he recoiled in disgust. They were themselves, but their eyes were almost demonic, dark and menacing. Their mouths were twisted in feral grins, showing razor sharp teeth. The sight was horrifying. But that wasn't the worst of it.

With their mouths, the family wished him a good morning, but that wasn't all Jon heard. It was if they were speaking in his head. He could feel hatred and malice pouring from them, weighing him down until he could bear it no more. Without even attempting to eat, Jon fled back to his chambers. Every person he passed shared the same terrifying face and same oozing hatred. It was too much. As soon as he was safely in his chambers, Jon slammed the door and barred it. No one was getting to him until he was prepared to leave.

In the back of his mind, Jon remembered the eerie voice from the night before, but he couldn't bring himself to care. He had to leave. Suddenly, as if summoned, the voice spoke again. "I know, young Snow. It hurts. People often hide themselves, but they cannot hide from me. I can help you. I would accept you no matter what." Jon glance over at the mirror to find the same woman staring back at him.

"Y-You're the Snow Queen. The stories said you could use mirrors." The woman chuckled lightly. "I suppose you could call me that, though I prefer Y/N. As I said, come to me, Jon and I will be there for you. Forever." Jon's brows furrowed. "Why?" You let out a sigh and explained that you, although powerful, were lonely. "You aren't afraid of snow or the power it possesses. You could easily be my king, if that is what you wish. You need only follow the brightest star and you will find me. Or remain forever plagued by the demons that pretend to love you."

Now, Jon wasn't a coward by any means, but his visions that morning had shaken him to his very core. Not to mention, his curiosity was piqued. After all why should a powerful being such as you take such an interest in him? He glanced back at your figure in the mirror. You were watching him struggle to make up his mind. After a moment, you sighed. "As I said, the choice is yours. But understand this, I cannot always control what the snow does. It is ruled by my emotions. The longer I wait for your answer, the worse the storm becomes." Before Jon could reply, you disappeared.

True to your word, the storm outside kicked up, harsh winds accompanying the bitter cold as more and more snow began to fall. If it continued too long, Jon wouldn't even be able to leave the castle if he wanted to. Still, he couldn't just up and leave. Could he? Would it even be worth it? He could die before he even walked ten miles. As if in answer to his worries, a particular hard wind blew nearly breaking the glass of his window.

"Alright. I get it. Hurry up," he muttered to himself. It really shouldn't have been such a difficult decision. He should stay with his family. Jon knew that. But at the same time, he couldn't live with seeing them like that every day for the rest of his life. And you were offering him the chance of adventure. Of being something greater than what he was. With that in mind, he glance back at the glass.

"Are you there?" Your vision appeared once more and you smiled, as if you had been just sitting around waiting. "I will find you." Your smile grew and the storm outside began to quiet down. "Then follow the star until you find my castle. It looks to be made of ice. I will look after you on your journey." Once more, Jon was left alone with his thoughts.

The young man quickly threw some things in to a pack, grabbed his sword and snuck out of the castle. The journey was long and hard as he navigated his way through the snow and ice, passed all manner of creatures and more demon-looking people. But even as he trekked through the nasty weather, Jon didn't feel cold or frightened. He knew he should be. After all, snow was beautiful, but deadly. That was its nature. Perhaps he didn't feel afraid because you were watching over him as you said you would.

Jon lost count of how many days he traveled before he finally came upon your castle. It was just as you'd said. White and shining, like ice. It wasn't until he climbing the steps that Jon felt anything even close to fear. Still he kept on. He was too close to turn back now. When he reached the doors, they opened like magic.

Jon wasn't sure how he knew where to go, but he entered the castle and made his way to where he was certain you were. The castle, despite being one of the Snow Queen, felt warm and welcoming. Jon felt at home. So much so that he simply knew just where to go. Sure enough, another set of doors opened to reveal a throne room. You were perched on a throne of what looked like ice or glass and you smiled upon seeing him enter.

He watched as you rose from your seat and made your way down to him. You stopped right in front of him and gazed into his dark eyes. "Why me?" he asked quietly and you chuckled, "Because you believed. No matter what you told others, you always believed I wasn't some story. And now, we shall rule the winter together. Welcome, Jon Snow, my new Snow King."

(a/n: Here you are! Tale 13! We've got 5 more to go!)

[chocosweets]

Request filled for @subarublue 💞🧁

Can I request a short and sweet little fluffy one shot (or just headcanons if a one shot is too much) where maybe Dante (Devil May Cry 5) first begins to realize he’s putting on some weight and feels a little self conscious about it? But he tries to hide it and blow it off like it’s nothing? But Reader notices the weight and his insecurities and lets him know they find him attractive no matter what?

Word Count: 1,416

Dante/Reader, SFW

Tags: Established Relationship, Post-DMC5, DMC5 Spoilers, Weight Gain, Weight Issues, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Insecurity, Affection, Cuddling & Snuggling

Enjoy, Eclair 🍩

***

Squish, squish.

Dante inspected his reflection carefully in the yellowed bathroom mirror as he changed out of his bloodied shirt, fresh after a long job. He prodded his bare flesh and watched as it squished incessantly.

His brows knitted as he continued to test the buoyancy—to see if it actually jiggled. The part of his body in question laid at the bottom of his stomach, underneath his six pack. The smallest bit of flab rounded into a little pouch that was soft to the touch, not hard and well-built like the rest of his muscles.

It was barely noticeable (unless someone pointed it out or felt it carefully), and truthfully he himself hadn’t noticed for all these months—until he’d done a particularly elaborate jump while fighting today and his shirt had scrunched up oddly as he soared and landed. And, well, as Nero has so eloquently put it: Ha! Look at that, the old man’s finally gettin’ fucking chubby!

There had been the usual light-hearted quips thrown back at his nephew, but when he got home he thought he ought to check it out for himself. The last row of his abs was beginning to fade into soft fat, and when he exhaled, the fat at his lower stomach hung over in a small curve below his belly button, brushing against the cool metal of his belt buckle lightly. There was a good portion of it that he could grab with his palm laying against the skin. He groaned a little to himself. Didn't his demonic metabolism usually prevent this sort of thing, as it had for the better part of thirty years?

What a pain. Dante pooled the weak faucet water in his hands and splashed the cool water onto his face. Maybe the kid had been right—and maybe he should lay off the pizza until that bump in his clothes stopped being visible.

------

For the seventh day in a row, you had stopped by the office without seeing any new pizza boxes strewn around the floor.

In fact, it wasn't only that, because you could've easily chalked it up to Lady or Trish—or quite possibly even Vergil, since he almost technically lived at Devil may Cry nowadays—forcing Dante to clean up his filth after the piles and odor had gotten unbearable. Except, it had also been seven days without interrupting him during a meal, or seeing him order any, or of you even smelling the aftermath of the steamy delicacy that still lingered in the air. You had only seen him eat sandwiches for lunch or snack on potato chips during the day, and occasionally pour himself bowls of cereal when you two watched TV late into the night.

Something was definitely up, but what it was, you didn't know. His behavior was mostly the same otherwise and he hadn't been drinking lately either, so you knew he hadn't slipped into another depressive episode or anything similar to that. You were thankful for that, at least, but the fact that he'd been abstaining from his precious pizza and declining all your offers of going out for an ice cream date for a whole week was certainly suspicious.

"Hey, baby." Dante sat up further in his chair when he saw you enter. That same cute smile of his was on his face, but he didn't look as peppy and carefree as usual. "What's cookin', good lookin'?"

Still, you grinned back and waved as you walked toward him. "Nothing much—except for visiting this sexy demon hunter I know."

"Oh yeah?" he goaded back playfully, shifting to face you in his seat as you made your way onto his side of the desk. "Have I met him before?"

"Don't think so," you huffed out between a laugh, and as you said it Dante brought himself up and closer to you—pulling you down into a quick kiss before sitting back down.

You looked around the place nonchalantly as you pulled a chair up for yourself in front of the desk, noting the lack of boxes again. A typical cola and magazine laid on his desktop, but there were still no stray slices of pizza or empty sundae glasses.

When you settled down in your seat, you cleared your throat, and he looked at you expectantly. "So, I guess you haven't had dinner yet? We should order some pizza and eat it over a movie."

Straight to the point, not wasting any time.

You swore he bit his bottom lip guiltily at the mention of his favorite food, and that his eyes lit up brighter than stars. He opened his mouth, though, about to respond, when—his stomach grumbled accordingly, as if pleading for some delicious, gooey pizza, making his eyes widen a fraction in embarrassment.

He laughed awkwardly. "Jeez, is it that obvious?"

"Dante." You gave him a knowing, but gentle look, and he groaned, as if realizing then that there was no point in denying it.

"Fine, I'll fess up." A sigh came out, and then he leaned forward on his desk. "I've just been dieting a little. It's no big deal."

"Dieting?" Your eyebrows creased more in concern than confusion.

"Yeah, aren't you proud of little ol' me? You're always saying I eat too much junk food." But then your brow raised at the obviously poor excuse, knowing that just your nagging alone wouldn't be enough to stop him from indulging. You stared further—and he relented with a sigh. "And, well— Figured it wouldn't look very good to clients if I was too...chubby."

That was putting it lightly, considering that even though he'd quit the pizza and ice cream, he was still devouring just as much food in a day. You could spot the beginning of a squishy-firm beer belly under his clothes when he leaned over and pressed into it like this. Dante picked up his can of soda to sip so he could avoid your gaze.

"That's all?" you asked, careful not to be too accusatory. There was an even more underlying reason here. He would tell you in time when he was ready, and you didn't want to push him too far at once. You reached over, still, and put your hand on his free one. (It made him tense up a little.)

"Yes," he insisted with his voice in a quick hiss. "What's wrong with me trying to slim down a little? I'm gettin' old, you know."

"Th-There's nothing wrong with it!" Damn, this seemed like a touchy subject to approach. So, you pulled out your most convincing voice. "And, well—to be honest, I didn't think you had put on all that much weight."

"Really? You don't think so?" He said it in a sarcastic deadpan, patting his soft lower belly for emphasis and leaning back into his chair. There, you were at least finally getting closer to his real feelings. You stood up and went back to his side of the desk, crouching to eye-level. You looked at him sweetly with a smile, and he seemed to melt. Dante crossed his arms over his chest and looked away almost bashfully when he said, "...Didn't think you'd like me letting myself go and all."

"Awww, don't be all pouty~" You leaned forward to pull him into a hug, holding him close. Your chest pressed to his, and you nuzzled his face with your cheek. "I don't mind if you're nice and soft, really. You're still handsome." He mumbled something under his breath, and you giggled again. "...And you're just too cute when you're pouty like this."

That got a little chuckle out of him, and he pressed a kiss to your neck. "I get it, I get it. No more grumpy Dante tonight, I promise." He relaxed with a sigh and ran his fingers through your hair. It was quiet for a moment. "But you meant all that?"

"Of course! Whether you're a little chubby, or in your devil form, or anything—you're still my Dante no matter what."

The man in question seemed to consider that, and then he shifted to embrace you back fully, nearly crushing you with his heavy grip. "Huh… That's pretty wholesome, babe."

You couldn't help but lift your head up and kiss his cheek as you giggled. "So, pizza?"

"Only if you let me take you on that ice cream date you've been wanting."

"Deal."

You held your hand out, and Dante shook it with gusto.