#i did not like going to that church

[genderqueer-karma]

good morning i just remembered the time my dad took me to his church for crimbo service when i was eight and the pastor made a sexual joke about the virgin mary. during his sermon. anyway.

[whilomm]

oh okay heres one:

"sleepaway camp"= you go there for at least a few days, a week, sometimes several weeks, and sleep there, as opposed to a """camp""" where you go for the day and your parents or whoever picks you up afterward (those arent really camps, but like. idk when i went to "space camp" it was a weeklong but not sleepaway). in the U.S. at least, the typical image of a sleepaway camp involves staying in cabins, dunno how common it is/what it looks like in other countries.

for the first few i just mean like. not necessarily a stealth church camp, just like. idk, a camp where theres also an Assumption Of Christianity and just general vibes without being actually church camp. So, there might not be daily services and jesusy dedicatwd activities, but maybe theres still a prayer said over meals and shit. Which i assume might exist...

(oh and @reblogforsamplesize if u wanna)

[doctorsiren]

he’s mad she ratted him out

[anghraine]

jenndoesnotcare replied to this post:

Every time LDS kids come to my neighborhood I am so so nice to them. I hope they remember the blue haired lady who was kind, when people try to convince them the outside world is bad and scary. (Also they are always so young! I want to feed them cookies and give them Diana Wynne Jones books or something)

Thank you! Honestly, this sort of kindness can go a really long way, even if it doesn't seem like it at the time.

LDS children and missionaries (and the majority of the latter are barely of age) are often the people who interact the most with non-Mormons on a daily basis, and thus are kind of the "face" of the Church to non-Mormons a lot of the time. As a result, they're frequently the ones who actually experience the brunt of antagonism towards the Church, which only reinforces the distrust they've already been taught to feel towards the rest of the world.

It's not that the Church doesn't deserve this antagonism, but a lot of people seem to take this enormous pride in showing up Mormon teenagers who have spent most of their lives under intense social pressure, instruction, expectation, and close observation from both their peers and from older authorities in the Church (it largely operates on seniority, so young unmarried people in particular tend to have very little power within its hierarchies). Being "owned" for clout by non-Mormons doesn't prove anything to most of them except that their leaders and parents are right and they can't trust people outside the Church.

The fact that the Church usually does provide a tightly-knit community, a distinct and familiar culture, and a well-developed infrastructure for supporting its members' needs as long as they do [xyz] means that there can be very concrete benefits to staying in the Church, staying closeted, whatever. So if, additionally, a Mormon kid has every reason to think that nobody outside the Church is going to extend compassion or kindness towards them, that the rest of the world really is as hostile and dangerous as they've been told, the stakes for leaving are all the higher, despite the costs of staying.

So people from "outside" who disrupt this narrative of a hostile, threatening world that cannot conceivably understand their experiences or perspectives can be really important. It's important for them to know that there are communities and reliable support systems outside the Church, that leaving the Church does not have to mean being a pariah in every context, that there are concrete resources outside the Church, that compassion and decency in ordinary day-to-day life is not the province of any particular religion or sect and can be found anywhere. This kind of information can be really important evidence for people to have when they are deciding how much they're willing to risk losing.

So yeah, all of this is to say that you're doing a good thing that may well provide a lifeline for very vulnerable people, even if you don't personally see results at the time.

[hotmessmaxpress]

vale is a god that marc was raised to worship. raised to be devout, spending long weekends on pilgrimages. his mother touches his cheeks gently when he tells her about god, about reverence. she blesses him until he's old enough to bless her, and he gently wipes away her tears of joy.

marc is a shining star of the religious order. as he grows older and travels more, spreading the word of god, he becomes more recognizable. he's charismatic and personable and people love him.

so he meets God.

God seeks him out, greets him when marc is alone. he's kneeling in the church, surrounded by a comforting blanket of incense and candle smoke, when the feet appear in front of him. when he looks up, God is standing before the altar. marc is terrified and awed and madly in love with the man before him.

he has spent so many hours in adoration, speaking to God like they're friends, and now God is in front of him, speaking back.

God continues to talk to marc, appearing when marc kneels for adoration. for their first few meetings he stands in front of him, talking while marc stares with starry eyes and sore knees. eventually he sits beside him, and they talk like friends. it never becomes less intense for marc, who always shakes slightly for hours afterward.

marc loves him. marc loves him with his entire heart and soul.

marc starts talking to others about his experiences. telling the world how he talks to God, what he's really like. he's as popular as ever, and people beg to meet him and to learn what insights and wisdom he's gained from his meetings with God. people flock to hear his sermons, to receive blessings from the man who is so connected to God. the man who is so holy by association.

and God doesn't like it.

how dare marc become so popular using his name? vale is God, and marc is only a man. how could the world treat marc with reverence when it should belong to Him?

and God spits snakes the next time he talks to marc. marc begs, explaining that the reverence the people have for marc is only because marc brings them closer to God. marc would never try and take the love that belongs to vale. he wouldn't. and isn't God the one who made marc this way? charismatic and popular? how could God be angry at marc for bringing people to the light?

but God doesn't see it. He doesn't understand.

he sneers at marc, no longer sitting with him. he casts glares down at marc while marc kneels, begging. marc spends hours wanting desperately to feel vale's love.

it never comes.

and then the church burns.

alex drags marc out of the building while marc sobs, palms burned and dirty with ash. he screams and sobs and people watch on. people know, somehow, that it was God himself who burnt the church. they know that marc is cast out, no longer holy. how dare he claim to be loved by God, when God would go so far as to burn his temple?

so marc goes into exile, with his patient brother for companionship.

the worst part, though, is that marc never stops praying. he never stops dropping to his knees to speak to God. even if God has abandoned him, marc can't help but pray.

[slushiebrain]

since i did traditional art last year and since i've started studying again and so have less free time, this year i'm doing pale gamkar week a little differently than my usual art (in the hopes it'll save me some time ; -- ;) i'm aiming for a little more cartoony and a whole lot sillier! i didn't have time to draw yesterday so today i'm posting both day 1 and day 2 of @pale-gamkar-week 2024 prompts: laughter and bath!

i might do full colours for these at some point but this is as good as it gets for now lol

[ink-blot-thoughts]

It is so eternally funny to me that the Fatui have acquired every single gnosis peacefully... except for Venti.

Zhongli had his contract, Yae Miko traded Ei's, Nahida also traded hers and Ei's, and Neuvilette just gave that shit away. Like we're introduced to them as stealing all the Gnoses and then they drop that shit immediately.

Even worse, they steal it from Venti. Fucking Venti. Mr Had a 500 Year Nap. Mr Tells His City To Be Free and Fucks Off. Mr Steals Wine For Himself. That dude. That's the one it was necessary to dropkick.

Like Signora could have sauntered up with an apple in one hand and a bottle of wine in the other and Venti would have given up his gnosis faster than you can say 'Freedom'.

And even if we go with the theory that Venti knows much more than he let's on, he would've have probably given it away anyway considering what we know now about the third Descender and all.

Like Signora had zero need for the bitchslap-dropkick-combo but she needed the Fatui to have a girl boss reputation so she did anyway. Rate. We stan a proactive Queen ig.

[high-voltage-rat]

Actually I'm still thinking about it. Another interesting way in which RvB is anti-war is the way that the Director fills the role of a villain and antagonist (especially in the Recollections trilogy, where he's a faceless villain we never see but is responsible for everything that happens).

In his memos to the Chairman, the Director emphasizes his sense of duty and obligation to the military- he becomes irate for the first time when he feels that it's being implied that he was derelict in his duty... or that the work he did out of that duty is being criticized for being against the military's interests. He also talks about Allison's death in a way I find... interesting.

"You see; I never had the chance to serve in battle. Nor did fate provide me the opportunity to sacrifice myself for humanity as it did for so many others in the Great War. Someone extremely dear to me was lost very early in my life. My mind has always plagued me with the question: If the choice had been placed in my hands, could I have saved her? [...] But, given the events of these past few weeks, I feel confident that had I been given the chance, I would have made those sacrifices myself... Had I only the chance."

The idea of sacrifice is central to the way he talks about his wife's loss, to the way he talks about the war in general. He talks of sacrifice with a sense of veneration- that it's something he aspires to do, that he longs for. There's a few ways we can interpret "I would have made those sacrifices myself"...

-That in Allison's place, he thinks he would have laid down his life too.

-That if given the chance, he would have given his life to save hers.

But most interestingly...

-That he would have sacrificed Allison's life for the continued survival of humanity, if that was what duty called for.

...And personally, I think all 3 are true.

In most war media, the Director's perspective on sacrifice is very common. Sacrifice is glorious and heroic- to die in battle is an honour- and it's the only way to ensure the group you serve survives. This is a tool of propaganda- nobody wants to go to war just for the sake of it, you have to give them a reason that the risk of dying or being permanently disabled isn't just acceptable, but desirable. Beyond that, most people don't want to do things they think are immoral- you have to convince them it's important, a necessary lesser evil. You teach them to sacrifice their morals, too.

The way they train soldiers to follow orders and to kill, is to convince them that they, and the people around them, and the people they care about, will all die if they don't. It's drilled into your head from day one. It's the way they ensure their commanding officers won't shy away from sending their men off to die. The message is constant- sacrifice is your duty, and duty ensures your people's survival.

In the Director's eyes, the damage Project Freelancer caused was his sacrifice. He never got the opportunity to sacrifice himself during the war- so he sacrificed others, as military brass do. The Freelancers- including his daughter. The countless sim troopers. Any people he considered "collateral damage" on missions. And when the opportunity to do so presented itself, he sacrificed a copy of himself- Alpha- and he sacrificed a copy of Allison- Tex.

The very thing that derailed his life- the loss of his wife- he made it happen again. He put her copy in dangerous situations, let her exist in the position of constant repeated failure, created the circumstances that would eventually lead to her death. He put their daughter in deadly situations that nearly killed her repeatedly, provided her with impossible expectations leading to self-destructive behaviours in the name of duty, implanted her with two AI knowing they could cause her permanent harm. He was confident he "would have made those sacrifices himself" because he did.

The Director is the embodiment of the military war machine. As an antagonist, he is a warning against buying into the glorification of sacrifice. He's a condemnation of the idea that one should be willing to do anything to win a war- that duty to the military is the thing that ensures survival... All the messages that are pushed to ensure recruitment and obedience of soldiers.

He's a reminder that swallowing the propaganda leads to you doing terrible things... and in the end, you're a broken man left mourning the losses that you suffered even as you repeated them, convinced that it was all necessary.

[deservedgrace]

one of the more frustrating aspects of ex evangelical/ex cult stuff for me personally is how hard it is to talk about. and part of that is the emotional side of it, yeah it's a shitload of cumulative and compounding trauma and trauma is hard to talk about sometimes. but it's not always hard to talk about, or at least equally hard to talk about, and the thing that's honestly more frustrating to me about that is how... extensive it is, how impossible it is to give an accurate picture of what it was like, especially succinctly. there are so many things that you need context for. there's so much that doesn't really sound that bad unless you have other information. so much was normalized to me that i have a hard time knowing what's actually "normal" and what's "yikes" to other people because i simply don't always have the context for "normal". there's so much that's normalized in society and churches that gets dismissed as "normal" when it really, really shouldn't be. there's so much i just don't remember because it slipped out of my brain the same as "normal" unimportant memories because my brain didn't process it as abuse or traumatic at the time due to that lack of context of what "normal" is; it was normal to me and just what people did and how people acted and what people said. and the thing that happens is all of this compiles into me sounding like i'm exaggerating and whining about a "normal church experience" because it's just so impossible to describe how all-encompassing being in a cult is if you don't have that experience.

[purpleshadow-star]

It's Valentines Day but it's also Ash Wednesday so uhh... some headcanons about that second thing.

Tilda wasn't super religious, but she'd drag Aaron to church every so often when he was growing up

After Tilda, Aaron doesn't actively practice religion much, but he'll do some things like get ashes on Ash Wednesday and observe lent

Nicky and Renee go to get their ashes together every year with a silent Aaron grumpily tagging along

They go in the morning after morning work out, but before their classes start, so once afternoon practice is over, they all end up with just a smudge of black on their foreheads

After living with Aaron and Nicky and a few other Christian households over the years, Andrew has gotten into the habit of not eating meat on Fridays during lent

Abby is also Christian, but she doesn't go to Church much and gets her ashes at a separate time than the Foxes

During lent, Abby will sometimes invite the Foxes over to her house for a seafood dinner on Fridays

Abby doesn't usually give anything up for lent, but Renee, Nicky and Aaron do

The girls' last year before they graduate, Renee gives up sweets for lent, and Andrew makes sure to eat twice the amount of candy around her just to be annoying

Nicky gives up alcohol and complains at least five times a day (and almost gives in on some particularly hard nights), but he manages to make it to the end without giving in

Andrew suggests that Aaron give up Katelyn for lent during a joint session with Bee, and he is not amused

Aaron ends up giving up video games, and he complains about it just as much as Nicky complains about the alcohol, but he also makes it to the end without giving in

Andrew walks into practice on Ash Wednesday and tells Wymack in a deadpan voice that he gave up exy for lent so he can't play. Wymack knows Andrew doesn't observe lent and makes him change out with everyone else, but Neil cracks up at the incredulous look Wymack has for the second before he calls Andrew out on it and that makes the extra lap (that Andrew doesn't actually do) worth it to Andrew

Neil makes a joke about Andrew giving up ice cream even though he knows Andrew doesn't officially observe lent, and Andrew doesn't talk to him for five hours out of spite

[plulp]

This implies Sydney the bully (preppy privileged rebel rich boy with teacher dad) and Whitney the pure/fallen (poor church boy. Idk less ideas 4 him) - Separate Anon.

OKAY SEPARATE ANON. NOW WE'RE COOKIN.

[aeonophagic]

me, the jester, asked the court if yaoi could bloom even on a battlefield. the court was so kind as to even help me care for the fields for it to sprout and then bloom — is it my fault?

bonus

[moomoorare]

Need I remind everyone Purgatory is done and it was just a game, for FUN!!!!! Same will be for purgatory 2!!! I understand having bias and favorite teams but do not in any case bring down others because yours is too special or whatever, they were all the same, they were all trapped in there with tensions high and did things they normally wouldn't, the characters acted accordingly to their lore, it's okay to be upset at some decisions made but god don't make it a state affair. It was just Block game rp alroiughtt

[arodeku]

In light of recent events (everyone collectively losing all hope of dapg is coming back in 2024) I went back and checked when the first videos of each year were posted in the past and I'm glad to inform you all that every single time a video was uploaded no sooner than the 17th and no later than the 20th. Please chill.

[tragedycoded]

seven deadly sins tag!

Ohhh shiiiit thanks @the-golden-comet! And bbgirl @sableglass!!

Rules: which of your OCs would you assign to which of the seven deadly sins and why?

With the caveat that everything about the seven deadly sins I know from watching the movie Se7en and I am using the Wikipedia page as an instruction manual, let's gooooo!

Greed: Technically it's Royston. Of my five main OCs, he's the only one who acquires more wealth than anyone could ever possibly do anything with (look up how far a dollar went in the 1870s if you want to have a minor heart attack.) He doesn't give back to the community, only shares his Knowledge with one person, and thinks it's cute that he has multiple bounties on his head. But he's not avaricious, bc one would need to not be a...

Sloth: ... which Royston also is. And there's a lot of overlap between his psychopathic/attention-deficit traits and what the Church considered slothful behavior so hmmmm. Second answer is Khalid based solely on the fact he's physically inactive and can't run in ALM2.0 because Reasons.

Wrath: After seeing Hofer's performance in the Bad Ending, I'm never calling Royston the trigger-happy one again. This man's emotional repression is lethal.

Gluttony: Royston is a "dainty" and "expensive" eater (Thomas Aquinas's words, not mine.) He has a legit survived-a-stabbing-to-the-guts reason for this. Thomas Aquinas doesn't give a fuck.

Envy: [huge sigh] He's also vain, has a high opinion of himself, and gets jealous of Molly, Sullivan's horse, no fewer than three times in one novel.

Lust: I'm giving this one to Sullivan. I know I rip on Royston for being a horny little bastard, but Sullivan wilds out a bit in Book 2 and I say GOOD FOR HIM HE EARNED IT.

Pride: I have to call him out for something besides being a skinny nerd: Khalid. And I can tell you why in one word. I'm not going to, bc I don't want to end up in the search engine. But you all know what word it is.

Tag, suckers! <3

@lychhiker-writes @cowboybrunch @finickyfelix @saturnine-saturneight

@ashfordlabs @autism-purgatory @noblebs @aintgonnatakethis

@the-golden-comet @asablehart @mauvecatfic @leahnardo-da-veggie

@sableglass @gioiaalbanoart @words-after-midnight

@lavender-bloom @jev-urisk @wyked-ao3

[moregraceful]

max and i are closing in on launching [redacted sports rpf charity fest] and i am once again pondering how do i write "experience with writing form emails and manipulating google forms in ways no one has dreamed of" in a cover letter without saying "i did it for the rpf grind"...like there's no way unless everyone in this microsoft teams meeting gets really cool about a bunch of stuff really quickly. you know