#i deserve some beautiful art of my blorbos that i didnt have to create. but the thought of asking someone to draw my ocs is akfjlfjksjas
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was gonna buy myself something ive had in my etsy faves for a while as a lil gift to myself & to cheer me up, but i just hear my conscious echo "material possessions wont fill the hole in your heart" so now im bummed out
#i should still. but i know it wont make me any less emotionally strained#i deserve it. ive been living in survival mode for weeks now#but its just gonna be an empty gesture because i know after a few days the novelty will wear off with nothing in its place. idk#maybe my gift to myself should be a commission? ive only purchased one before and it was like 8 years ago#i deserve some beautiful art of my blorbos that i didnt have to create. but the thought of asking someone to draw my ocs is akfjlfjksjas#i feel the cringe embarrassment already 😩😭😖🤡#maybe i will. we'll see#emma rambles#personal
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