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wqnwoos · 4 months ago

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You were once deeply and irrevocably in love with Kwon Soonyoung, and it’s incredibly hard to avoid that fact when he works literally two offices down from you. It’s even harder to avoid when you’re stuck in a broken elevator with him for hours, and he seems determined to dissect everything that went wrong three years ago.

⇢ pairing: kwon soonyoung x f!reader

⇢ genre: angst, fluff, exes!au, lawyer!au

⇢ wc: 5.6k

⇢ warnings: minor alcohol consumption, lots of flashbacks

⇢ a/n: early happy new year!! this is my gift to u all <3 thank u to @haologram for hosting this collab and for just being alive. and thank you SOO much to ally @lovetaroandtaemin and em @gyuswhore for beta'ing i appreciate u both endlessly 💗

as part of the don’t hate, litigate! collab hosted by the wonderful @haologram

SOMETIMES IT TRULY feels like God, or the stars in your skies, or whatever the hell is controlling your fate down on this measly earth, hates you.

Sometimes it truly feels like this indefinite being is determined to deal you the worst set of cards, and this – this trumps all. Being stuck in an elevator with your ex-boyfriend sounds like the beginning of a shitty romcom, except it’s not. It’s your life, and it’s been your life for the past eight minutes, since the metal box you stepped in ground to a creaky, noisy halt halfway between the sixth and seventh floor.

And it takes eight minutes before Soonyoung sighs resignedly. “Are you just going to ignore me forever?”

Forever, you think, is your least favourite word. There were a lot of things you thought you’d have forever, and one of them is standing right next to you.

You swallow thickly. Your reply comes measured and clipped. “For as long as possible.”

When he speaks next, you can hear the attempt at a forced smile in his tone. “Well, you kinda just failed.”

You stay silent. If anyone had told you five years ago that Kwon Soonyoung would be begging to talk to you and you’d be ignoring him, you would have called them crazy; and yet, here you are. Ignoring him like your sanity depends on it, because actually, it does. So for the past eight minutes – nine now, but who’s counting? – you’ve barely spoken a word. You’re both stuck; the recovery team can’t make it for two hours at least; and God hates you, basically.

Soonyoung’s trying to make the most of it, and you’re not letting him.

He says your name, ever so softly. “Really, though. How – how have you been?”

It’s weird, going from years of no contact to working together. It’s been a year since Soonyoung joined your company, but it hasn’t become any easier. Not when he’s such an open book, so fucking easy for you to read. Every time you cross paths, he gets this look in his eyes – sad puppy, you’ve nicknamed it. Now is no different.

“I’ve been okay,” you say finally, stiltedly. You’ve never been able to resist that face, and you’re pretty sure he knows it too. “What about you?”

The silence is painful, but the way he says fine stings a little bit more. You know when he’s lying, and he never used to do that to you.

“So…” He shifts his weight awkwardly, huffing out an uncomfortable laugh as he gazes intently at his shoes. “This is weird, right?”

You match him with an equally uncomfortable smile. “The weirdest.”

“Our longest conversation after forever,” he says. “But I wasn’t expecting it to go like this.”

You cock your head to the side, fixing him with a questioning gaze. All hopes of ignoring him are sailing out the hypothetical window. “How were you expecting it to go?”

Soonyoung looks up at you with one of those embarrassed, endearing smiles. “Better.”

There’s a pregnant pause, and then – “You know, Jeonghan calls you the one that got away.”

He’s always had a habit of dropping things like that on you; things that leave you a little winded.

“That makes it sound like I escaped,” you say, with an ease you don’t feel.

Clearly, Soonyoung doesn’t feel it either — he exhales heavily. “Maybe you did. Escape, I mean.”

You snap your head towards him, eyes almost owlish in your surprise; “You’re not serious.” When he doesn’t say anything, you continue haphazardly, “Soonyoung, that’s not — there wasn’t anything to escape from.”

Your ex-boyfriend looks miserable. Avoids eye contact, staring fixedly at his shoes with a dejected expression he can’t properly disguise; even throughout the three years of your relationship, you rarely saw him like this. He looks…

Heartbroken, your mind suggests.

“I’m serious,” you insist again, pushing the thought out of your mind. “You weren’t a bad boyfriend, Soonyoung.”

He snorts then. “Okay, we both know that isn’t true.”

“It is!”

“If we had, like, a counter of who fucked up however many times, I would leave you in the dust.”

You don’t know how to tell him this might even be half of it. This weird pedestal he puts you on – it’s not even guilt-tripping. You’ve seen that, but never from him; Soonyoung just truly, sincerely feels bad. Whenever you look back on your relationship, which is more often than you’d care to admit, it’s plain as day. He truly, sincerely feels that he has never deserved you. Like you’re something out of this world, out of his world.

“Wow.” Soonyoung huffs out the one word, and it’s half a laugh, half admiration. “You are so out of my league.”

“Stop,” you whine, pushing his shoulder lightly. “Don’t say stupid things like that.”

“Well, not everyone gets to date the prettiest girl in law school,” he retorts quickly, lifting his brows. “Not sure why I of all people get to, but thank you.”

“Stop it,” you repeat, rolling your eyes and fixing the tie he’s wearing. “You’re gorgeous and you know it. You should know it, at least.”

“Not just that!” he protests quickly. “I just mean… you’re so smart. And good. And kind, and funny, and — ”

“Ah, yes! Of course, Kwon Soonyoung, known famously for being mean and horrible and extremely unfunny,” you say sarcastically, before tugging his tie and pressing a quick kiss to his lips. “I choose my league, and you’re the only one in it.”

“That doesn’t make any sense,” he murmurs, slightly breathless.

“Oh, shut up and kiss me.”

There were a lot of things that went wrong with you and Soonyoung. You’d started off wonderful: both of you bright, flaming, drawn to each other like magnets. You managed the stresses of law school, graduated together, and lined up jobs – jobs that were miles and miles from each other.`

There were lots of things that went wrong with you and Soonyoung, but if you had to pick one, it would be long distance.

“When did we stop trying?”

The question makes you snort. “What, you want a date and a time?”

Soonyoung smiles ruefully, but there’s nothing happy about it. It’s more of a painful grimace. That’s always been the way with you both: you deflect, he feels. He doesn’t hide the way you do, not from anyone. And for a few years, he was the only one who you didn’t hide from.

Maybe that’s what has you opening your mouth again. “I could probably give you one. A date, I mean.”

Soonyoung hugs his knees to his chest, eyes searching your face. You can read him so well it physically makes you ache. The hint of uncertainty in his eyes, the twitching of his fingers – he’s nervous. He’s torn between wanting to know what you have to say and the strong sneaking premonition that it might hurt. “Go on,” he says finally, just as you knew he would.

Honestly, you don’t have an exact date. Things fell apart slowly, and then all at once. A toppling tower – leaning, leaning, leaning, until it crashed.

“There were probably a few things,” you say, softly. “My birthday, for a start.”

He winces reflexively. “That…” he begins, and then breathes out, shutting his eyes. “I don’t think I’ll ever be able to make up for that.”

“I mean, in the end, it wasn’t that big of a deal.” You’re not sure why you’re trying to reassure him, even if it's true. You forgave him almost immediately.

“Shit.”

Soonyoung’s first eloquent word when he walks into the apartment only means you become sure of what you already suspected. He takes in the half-eaten cake on the table, candles blown out and tossed to the side, the scraps of wrapping paper littering the floor, the cards; you take in his face. And you know, as quick and as simple as that – he forgot.

Some small part of you had been holding a sneaking hope that maybe this was just an elaborate attempt at a surprise. You’d told him once, months and months ago, that you didn’t think ignoring people on their birthday to surprise them later was a very nice thing to do. But you’d rather he forgot that than your entire birthday.

His eyes meet yours, both of you frozen to your places. Him at the doorway, you at the table. The distance between you isn’t more than a few metres, but suddenly it feels like an engulfing abyss. Still, even from the other side, you can feel the guilt pouring out of him.

“Shit,” he says again, before rushing his words out. “Shit, baby, I’m so sorry.”

You haven’t cried all day. You haven’t let yourself, but this has your eyes brimming over before you can control it.

“I’m going to bed,” you say finally, hugging yourself tightly, making yourself smaller. The apartment is warm, but you suddenly feel freezing. And despite your best efforts, there’s a waver in your voice, verging on a crack. “I’m tired.”

You glance over the remains of your birthday party, one that you plastered a fake, painful smile on the whole way through, and then you turn to leave.

“Baby, wait,” he implores quickly, and takes a step towards you — you mirror it immediately with a step back, and it makes him pause, his expression falling even further. “Baby.”

“You’re not allowed to call me that.” Your voice is obviously shaking now. “Not today. Maybe — maybe tomorrow.”

Maybe tomorrow you’ll be able to hear his excuses, his promises, but today, you’re allowed to be upset. You’ll let yourself have today, at the very least.

He’d driven hours to see you that day, but he’d still forgotten why he was there. You hadn’t really celebrated your birthday before you met him. Soonyoung was the one who made it a big deal, back when you first started dating, and even now, there’s a sharp pang in your chest when you remember how hurt you were that day.

“You made up for it tenfold,” you remind him now, because it’s true. He made the rest of the week practically a utopia, once you banned him from apologising. And he’d been so busy at work, so incredibly tired the whole month before, and you could understand. Both that he upset you, and that it was an innocent mistake. And you’ve never seen more sincere apologies than those that came from Soonyoung.

He looks grim, shakes his head, but doesn’t say any more. Probably because you’ve had this conversation a few times already, both of you too stubborn to give in.

“Keep going,” he says, then, looking at you head on. “What else?”

All of a sudden, you don’t want to talk about what else. All of a sudden, you’re annoyed with him, his stupid face, this stupid elevator. “Do we have to do this?” Your voice has switched from somewhat reassuring to harsh – for want of a better word, angry. It makes his brown eyes a little round with surprise, his mouth parting a little.

“What?”

“What else and what if have been on my mind for three years, Soonyoung,” you say acidly. “Forgive me if I don’t really want to talk about it to your face.”

Again, his mouth opens a little bit, stays open as he tries to form words. Until he gives up, seals his lips and nods. “Alright. Okay. That’s fine.”

“I know it’s fine!” you cry out, only more angry that he won’t argue back. You’re lawyers, it’s what you do. And just to be petty, you add — “Besides, I bet your girlfriend wouldn’t be happy about this anyway.”

Finally, his passive poker face drops, and he looks a little confused. “My what?”

Immediately, you regret opening your mouth, but it’s too late to back down. “Your girlfriend. You know, that girl from accounting.”

“The girl fr— You mean Rachel?” Soonyoung gapes at you, and something in you bridles, until he continues. “Mrs Choi, who's married to her wife and adopting a kid next year?”

Well, now you feel stupid as fuck.

“I don’t have a girlfriend,” he continues, and if you weren’t afraid to look at him right now, you’d swear he was hiding a smirk.

“Whatever. I don’t care. Why are we even talking about this?” you snap, irritated and embarrassed.

He still sounds smug. “You brought it up.”

“You sit with her every lunch hour,” you mutter, heat creeping up your neck. “I just assumed.”

“Well, there’s nothing there. So don’t worry.”

“I’m not worried! I don’t care who you date, Soonyoung!”

He looks a little taken aback, blinking once or twice, cockiness gone without a trace. “Wow,” he says, finally. If you didn’t know him as well as you did, you wouldn’t notice the slight tremble in his voice. “That’s the first time you’ve said my name since — ”

He cuts himself off, but you complete the sentence in your head — three years ago. Three years since you packed up and walked out of his life. It feels like a decade ago; it feels like last week. You’d been so sure that you wouldn’t see his face again after that, that it was a decided end of a full four years of your life. Until last year, when he’d waltzed straight back into your life, this time at your workplace.

“This is the new hire.” Your boss is speaking, but you’re still finishing up the last sentence on the document you’re working on, and you listen absently as he fires a couple instructions — “Jeon, you’ll show him around. Filing system, get him logged on, the works.”

You look up then, to cast Wonwoo a knowing smile, because he always gets lumped with showing around the newbies, but halfway to making eye contact with your friend, you catch the familiar tilt of a jaw, the soft lines of a nose you know so well.

You’ve seen Soonyoung in a hundred people since you left him. You’re always looking over your shoulder at the bus stop, at the grocery store, at the library, finding a tiny piece of him in everyone and everything, a tiny piece that lodges itself tight and sharp into your throat until you take a second look, until you see unfamiliar eyes or too dark hair or shorter legs. Until you find something to make you swallow, exhale, and keep walking.

Now, your second look doesn’t yield anything unfamiliar. Except maybe his hair, gone from blonde to black, but everything else — everything else. It’s him, and he looks just as shocked to see you as you are to see him. There’s a heavy moment that seems only heavy to the two of you, everyone else still talking, the boss still giving instructions, but you and Soonyoung are looking at each other, dumbfounded, and all you can think about is the distinct taste of bile in your throat and the tie he’s wearing is the one you got him for his birthday.

Your initial plan is to avoid him. He foils that plan within two hours, cornering you in the break room, whispering urgently, “I had no idea you worked here, I swear I’m not, like, following you or – ”

The thought hadn’t even crossed your mind, and you just pin him with a blank stare.

“I could quit.”

You’re shaking your head before he can even finish the sentence. “I’m not so butthurt that I can’t be a professional.”

“Right,” Soonyoung nods, breathing out a little. His lips are chapped. He never used to wear lip balm, just used to borrow yours. You hate yourself a little for remembering that.

The memory almost makes your lips twist with an sardonic smile. “I was so pissed when you showed up here.”

You can see his half smile, rueful and charming, through your peripheral vision. “I felt so bad about it, you know. But you just seemed annoyed when I saw you in the break room, so I figured you weren’t… mad or upset or anything.”

“I went straight from the break room to cry in the bathroom for fifteen minutes,” you admit truthfully. “I had to tell Wonwoo I had curry for breakfast.”

“You cried?”

You scowl. “I’m not saying it to be pitied, Soonyoung. I’m just saying, I’m not, like, some heartless jerk with no feelings. Of course I was upset.”

“I know that,” he says quickly, vehemently. “Of course I know that.” He hesitates, and then continues, words practically inching out of him. “It’s not really my place to ask, but… you and Wonwoo… are you guys…?”

“You’re right,” you say, and press your cheek onto your knees to fix him with your eyes. “It’s not your business. But that’d be hypocritical of me, so… no. No, we’re just friends. I’m friends with his girlfriend too, Cam, she works at the plant shop down the road.”

Soonyoung tilts his head back, lets out one of those breathy laughs that aren’t really laughs. “It’s so weird that you have new friends now.”

“Thanks,” you say, dripping with sarcasm.

“Not like that! I just mean I’m so used to – like, it used to be our friends, you know what I mean?”

“Not since three years ago,” you say with false lightness, because when you lost Soonyoung, you lost the friends he brought you too. You catch the glint of pity in his eyes again, and scoff. “It’s not a big deal. They were your friends first.”

Frowning, he speaks again. “First doesn’t matter. It didn’t matter to them either. Seungkwan said you were the one who stopped answering their calls.”

It’s true, and the feeling still burns a little, because Seungkwan and Jeonghan had called so many times. Even Vernon called a couple times, and you weren’t even that close to him, but Soonyoung has always attracted good people. Like calls to like. Maybe that’s why you ended up leaving.

“I was trying to make it easier,” you say bluntly., “for them to choose you.”

Your ex-boyfriend clicks his tongue, rakes a hand through his dark hair. “It’s not about sides, ___, for fuck’s sake.”

“Well, it felt like it at the time, alright?” Your words come out louder than you mean them to, and you pause, trying to quell your defensiveness.

Soonyoung raises his hands in half-hearted surrender. “Alright. Alright.”

Something in your stomach feels acidic. Leaning your head back against the cool wall of the elevator, you manage to meet his eyes apologetically. “How – how are they, though? Seungkwan and everyone?”

Graciously, he ignores your quick show of temper. “They’re good. Seungkwan’s working freelance photography now. Jeonghan still hates his job, but keeps getting promoted anyway.”

Jeonghan. You told him you thought you were going to break up before you even told Soonyoung. You wonder if he remembers it, because that night is seared into your memory – New Year’s Eve, three years ago.

You’re much drunker than you ever intended to be when you finally find a place to sit in the cramped apartment, waved over by a sympathetic looking Jeonghan. He pats your head affectionately as you groan.

“Feeling alright?”

“No,” you say elaborately.

Jeonghan never pries, which is probably what makes people tell him everything. He only raises his eyebrows at you, a hint of scepticism toying with his smile.

You look away, eyes drawn immediately to your boyfriend, laughing in the middle of the kitchen. Throwing his head back, squeezing his eyes shut, looking so fucking happy; when you see him like this, your heart always feels so incredibly warm and so incredibly full.

Except today, there’s something else intertwining it, something similar to dread, and it causes the faint smile on your face to fade a little.

Jeonghan sees it, of course, and when you look back at him, his eyebrows only raise higher.

You sink further into that horrible, looming feeling. “Jeonghan.”

“___.”

“I think I’m going to break up with him this year.”

If you didn’t know Jeonghan as well as you do, you’d think the information hadn’t affected him at all; his features remain completely impassive, but you catch the flash of surprise in his eyes. He stays quiet for a long time, the silence between you filled with thumping bass and indistinct conversation, until finally, he asks the only question there is to ask. “Why?”

It’s ridiculous, how one word can bring you to the verge of tears. But that one word holds so much weight – why would you break up with him? Why would you, when you’ve pictured a future with him a thousand times over?

Why would you leave the best thing that ever happened to you?

You blink back the tears, and Jeonghan waits.

His voice is soft, but you still hear him under the din of the party. “Is this about your birthday?”

You shake your head quickly. “No.” You stop. “Maybe. It’s – there’s just – little stupid things.”

“Little things add up,” Jeonghan says gently. You hate how he’s already understanding.

“Sometimes – ” You swallow thickly. “Sometimes I just feel so far away from him.”

You don’t have to explain that you don’t mean physically. Because that’s part of it, but it’s not all of it, but without you saying that, Jeonghan knows. You barely notice when he takes your plastic red cup from your hands, setting it on the table next to him. “And I know he loves me, and he’d never hurt me on purpose, and – he’s been so good to me, Jeonghan.”

Jeonghan only hums, waits for you to continue. And you do, the alcohol only pushing more words out of your mouth. “The distance,” you say, “is killing us.” You rub furiously at your eyes. “No matter how hard we try, Jeonghan, it’s not working, and I feel like – I’m the only one who can see that. He’s ignoring it, but we can’t keep going like this.”

Jeonghan hesitates for a second, looking torn, more torn than you’ve ever seen him look. “Do you still love him?”

Tears blur your vision again, but don’t quite escape this time. “I don’t know how to stop.”

When you kiss Soonyoung after the countdown, your cheeks are wet.

“Long distance.”

“What?”

“You asked what else,” you say, picking at your nails. “I think it was the distance. I think that’s what – you know. Broke us up.”

Soonyoung has that look in his eyes, the one where he wants to argue but knows he’s going to lose, knows that you’re right. He breathes out, licks his lips and tries to speak. “We tried so hard.”

It’s not even a counter-argument. You agree with him, even. The two of you were brilliant at long distance, until you weren’t. Hours-long video calls, surprise weekend visits, staying over for the holidays, until it all started collapsing. Weekly movie nights kept getting postponed. Visits had to decrease in number. You were missing each other’s calls – if one of you wasn’t working late, the other always was. It was like the entire universe was working against you both, and suddenly, you felt like a burden rather than a lover, and Soonyoung would probably say the same. It’s hard not to feel that way, when you’re celebrating your anniversary over FaceTime and both of you keep dozing off while the other talks.

In a way, Soonyoung is right: you both tried so hard. In a way, he’s so wrong: neither of you tried hard enough.

Towards the end of it all, you were too tired to fight. Both of you were. The breakup was a quiet affair, mostly. You brought it up first, standing in the kitchen of Soonyoung’s apartment after realising you had no idea where he kept his cereal bowls.

“Soonyoung?”

“Babe, I told you, it’s the third cupboard from the left,” he calls, but he’s rounding the corner to his kitchen anyway. He stops in his tracks when he sees your face, smile fading, and for a second, time freezes.

“Soonyoung,” you say again, quieter.

And he knows. “Don’t,” he says, faintly, but there’s no weight behind it, because he knows.

Tears are already brimming your eyes, and you’re wrapping your arms around yourself, shaking your head. “I can’t,” you say, and you’re not sure what you mean. I can’t end it. I can’t keep going.

The picture before him is enough for Soonyoung, and any defence, any fight he still had in him (because he’s always been the more tenacious) drains. He gives in, same as you.

“Okay,” he says, in a voice that’ll haunt you for years to come, a clashing harmony of gentle and damning. “Okay.”

You try to formulate words. You fail. All that you can say is “Soonyoung.” before you trail off.

You don’t finish. He gives you a tired, forced smile, says something about, “We had a good run, didn’t we?”, but you’re too busy trying to wrench the tears back into your eyes to focus properly. Your efforts are in vain, of course, tears slipping down your cheeks hot and heavy, no matter how much you try to stop.

“I’m sorry,” you say tearfully, but he shakes his head.

“Don’t be sorry.”

After that, he only helps you load your bags into your car and says thank you when you give him the house keys. He does everything so quietly, so methodically, so defeatedly. It’s like he’s just lost a war he’s been fighting for far too long.

It turns out that in the end, four years can be reduced down to this: two cardboard boxes, three bin bags, and two broken hearts.

It’s your fault, in technical terms. You finished this. You’re the one who said the words, or almost said them, the one who spelled out what was so obviously ignored. More than once, because you’d tried this before, six months ago. Soonyoung was the one who fought back. He’d said no, of course, that first time. He’d said no with tears in his eyes, like it was a surprise to him, like he couldn’t see it the way you saw it — that you were on two very different paths.

Soonyoung didn’t believe in following diverging paths, he believed in forcing yourself straight ahead hand-in-hand, come hell or high water. He believed in it, until he didn’t, and then he let you go.

When it’s time for you to leave, he accepts the hug you can’t help but fling on him just before you step in the car. Both of your arms around each other, fitting into place like you have a hundred times before, but so much tighter and so much briefer this time. Soonyoung clings to you like he’s never going to see you again, because he isn’t. You cling to him like this is the last time you’ll ever hug him, because it is.

And then both of you are pulling away, laughing awkwardly at the wet patch you’ve left on his shirt, and then you’re getting in your car and he’s waving you off and it’s over, just like that.

“It’s kind of ironic, isn’t it?” There’s an acerbic quality to Soonyoung’s laugh as he continues. “We broke up because of distance, and here we fucking are.”

There’s a metre and a half between you two.

“Maybe it was a dumb reason,” you say. Voicing the thought that’s tormented you since the day you drove away. Because maybe it was stupid. Maybe it was a temporary rough patch, and if you’d stayed, if you’d fought a little more and a little longer, you’d still have Soonyoung.

But you didn’t, and you don’t.

There’s a heavy expression on Soonyoung’s face, a strange mix of anger and confusion and guilt. “Maybe,” he says, at last. There’s the vaguest trace of bitterness, the little tiny sting that reminds you again that you’re the one who called it quits.

“It felt like the weight of the world at the time,” you say ashamedly, squeezing your eyes shut for a second.

Soonyoung takes the chance and scoots closer to you, sitting against the wall with you, shoulder-to-shoulder. (How easy it would be to just rest your head there, as you’ve done a thousand times before.) “It can’t have been easy,” he says, patting your hand with his own. Warm and familiar in its unfamiliarity, which is when you realise you’ve misread him, for once – he’s not bitter. He’s empathetic.

“It wasn’t stupid,” Soonyoung continues softly, rubbing his eyes, “but God, I wish you’d just talked to me. Actually — I wish we’d talked to each other.”

“Yes, well,” you say dryly, wondering if he’s going to catch your reference, “I’ve always had a problem with communication.”

He catches it; it makes him pause, lift up his head, give you a tiny smile.

It takes you a minute to register that the seat across from you has been occupied. When you do look up, you realise Soonyoung’s mouth has been moving since he sat down, and you haven’t heard a word of it. Also, somewhere between the class you guys shared two days ago and his presence in the library this morning, his hair’s gone from a discreet dark brown to a particularly indiscreet blond.

“I’m sorry,” you shake your head, taking out your earphones and setting down your pen. “What?”

“I said – do you have a problem with communication or something?” Despite the nature of his words, he’s practically beaming at you.

You blink at him, bewildered. “I mean… maybe? But — what?”

He holds up his phone. “Project,” he explains elaborately. “I’ve been texting, and I didn’t get a reply, and then I saw you over here, so I thought I’d ask.”

You frown, grabbing your phone. “I didn’t get any texts.”

Soonyoung mirrors your expression, tapping at his screen, and you’re struck by how much the blond suits him. As did the brown. As did the black he had a semester ago. Not that you’ve been keeping track, but it’s hard to not notice someone like Soonyoung. Even if the first time you talked to him was two days ago to organise the project you’ve been paired up for — you know him. Of him, at least.

He swivels his screen round to face you, showing you a contact with your name and what you quickly realise is almost your number. You smile a little awkwardly, tapping the last digit. “That’s meant to be a seven. You’ve got an eight.”

“Fuck,” he exhales, “that explains it. Who the hell have I been texting about litigation then?”

Something about his expression and his tone is so comical it makes you laugh, which surprises him a little – he glances up at you with a blatantly admiring smile, and he taps the edge of the desk. “Your eyes light up when you laugh, did you know?” And as quickly as he says it, he moves on, gesturing to your phone. “I’ll text you about the project, okay?”

He’s like a hurricane, and you’re trying your best to keep up. “Okay,” you agree confusedly, still hot-faced from the sudden compliment. “Yes. That’s — yes.”

As he gets up to leave again, he shoots you another one of those blinding, dazzling smiles, and sticks his hand out. “We’re friends now, right?”

His question sounds childishly sweet, and you can’t find it in yourself to do anything other than agree.

Your one little reference sets you both off. You spend the next two hours talking and talking and talking, every other sentence beginning with “Remember when…”, as the two of you dredge up the long-buried memories of four long years spent together.

Soonyoung talks about the massive crush he had on you before you even got paired up for the project. You talk about how you never believed him, even when he did ask you out – it took three tries before you understood how serious he was. And then you remember the time Soonyoung sprinted from campus to his accommodation and back just to get you the calculator you forgot for your exam – and the time you both went to a frat party and ended up playing the most intense game of UNO in the bathroom with Vernon, which ended in a drunk Soonyoung trying to flush the cards down the toilet.

He talks about the surprise party you threw for his birthday, and you talk about the time he tried to make you pancakes for National Girlfriend Day and failed horribly. You ate them anyway.

You don’t, however, talk about other things, even if you remember them. You remember Soonyoung kissing your forehead every morning he woke up next to you. You remember him buying your favourite flowers for your favourite vase every week. You remember coming home after a long day to food already delivered and paid for when he was working hours and hours away. You remember being so incredibly in love that it made you giddy and so in love it made you calm. And you don’t talk about it, just store it away somewhere as a reminder of what love is meant to feel like. If four years with Soonyoung brought you anything, it’s that: it taught you how to love and be loved.

When the recovery team finally arrives, you leave the elevator feeling like a new person. It doesn’t hurt when you look at Soonyoung anymore, there’s only a vague, warm fondness. And he can look you in the eye now, which he does. He smiles at you, sticks out his hand the same way he did all those years ago.

“We’re friends now, right?”

an / AHHH!!!!!! i know this fic is only like 5k but it took a lot out of me so i’d love to hear your thoughts. literally any thoughts. i wanted this fic to be longer but it happened this way and. what can i do. i may be the author but im NOT in control. it’s not a fic i’m 100% proud of but i think it’ll still hold a special place in my heart!!!! i love an angsty exes au.

anyway — this will be my last fic this year!!! see you all in 2025 and thank you so much for all the notes and all the reblogs and all the wonderful conversations this year i love you

perm taglist: @n4mj00nvq @eoieopda @som1ig @glowunderthemoon

@wondering-out-loud @tokitosun @hannyoontify @sahazzy

@dokyeomin @icyminghao @smilehui @nicholasluvbot @lvlystars

@immabecreepin @hanniehaee @kokoiinuts @astrozuya @doublasting

@yepimthatonequirkyteenager @qaramu @weird-bookworm @phenomenalgirl9

@lightnjng @strnsvt @onlyyjeonghan @athanasiasakura

@iamawkwardandshy @twilghtkoo @yuuyeonie @lllucere

@pearlesscentt

@sourkimchi @porridgesblog

#DHLCollab #seventeen x reader #hoshi x reader #hoshi fluff #hoshi angst #seventeen fluff #soonyoung fluff #soonyoung x reader #seventeen fic #hoshi fic #soonyoung fic #seventeen angst #soonyoung angst

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channieschaoscorner · 5 days ago

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New Beginnings - Stray Kids x female!9th member

Pairing: Chan x 9th Member

Summary: You find out your best friend is getting his chance but all he can think about is how he needs you there with him.

Genre: Fluff mainly, little bit of angst

A/N: Hi guys <3 A nice one with a happy ending to make up for the tears on the last few posts, I hope you enjoy :) This can be read alongside my other 9th member writings, there are a few things that tie them all together <3

Part Two

Masterlist

────୨ৎ────

The JYPE building was always buzzing with people but the only difference today was everyone was talking about the same thing.

The new survival show.

The announcement had been made throughout the company that a new boy group would be formed and they would fight to make it to the end and all debut together. It was exciting, it was intense, it was everything you had been dreaming about. The opportunity to prove yourself and be able to finally debut.

You had already made a name for yourself within the company, spending so many years as a trainee had led to you to your current position. You were senior to many of the younger and newer trainees which often left you teaching and mentoring them, being a reassuring presence in their life for when things got tough, a helping hand for hard practices or monthly evaluations. No one doubted your skills, it was just never the right time to debut you. It wasn’t that the company didn’t appreciate your work, you had often been called in to assist with other groups choreography, the friendships you’d made with others before their own debut had meant they wanted your input on their own concepts.

You’d finished a particularly intense rehearsal session with some of the new rookies when you heard the rumours. You didn’t mean to listen in on their conversations but it was hard not to, not when all the building was discussing was who would be participating in the survival show.

“I’ve heard he gets to choose his own members.”

“No, they’ll have to be approved first. They won’t just let anyone on the show.”

“I don’t know, he’s been here so long. I think they’ll let him take who he wants.”

Your ears pricked at that but you stayed silent.

You kept to yourself for the rest of the day, going through the motions in your own practices, helping the younger trainees, working on a solo project for the evaluations. It had all but been officially confirmed who would be leading the new group, you wanted to wait until he told you himself. No point in feeling your emotions until you knew for sure. It didn’t stop the negativity creeping in though as the day went on, that gnawing feeling at the back on your brain, the part that you tried your hardest to bury down and keep hidden. The selfish, ugly part of you that if you found out it was true, would be upset, disappointed, angry and would selfishly want him to fail so he could stay with you. It was the darkest corner of your mind that made you deeply ashamed to even have those thoughts but it didn’t reflect how you actually felt, in the end, you desperately wanted him to succeed. He had been waiting for his chance so long, much longer than you, you just didn’t anticipate how much it would hurt the day he would finally get it and move on, leaving you behind in his shadow.

The incessant battle of those thoughts is what drove you into a practice room late at night, long since abandoned for the day. It gave you the shelter you needed from the world. The shelter to feel your feelings and move through them in the hopes that when you saw him, you could congratulate him and truly be happy. You connected your phone to the speakers and hit shuffle, you flicked through until you landed on something that pulled at your chest. You weren’t too fussed on the movements, this wasn’t for anything in particular, it didn’t need to be perfect or polished. It was raw and emotional. You had never been great at talking about your feelings, often choosing the option to dance through them instead.

“I knew I’d find you here.” A voice from behind you interrupted your movements.

You opened your eyes and looked into the mirrors, focusing on the person behind you. You bit back a grin, making the choice to ignore the realisation that this wouldn’t be your norm anymore.

“Stalker.”

Chan smiled but it didn’t reach his eyes and he adjusted his backpack as he stepped forward. He was pulling at the straps and bouncing on his feet, unable to keep himself still.

He was nervous.

You knew what this meant.

“I heard the news.” You spoke for him. “Congratulations.”

His eyes widened. “I didn’t realise how many people were talking about it, I was hoping I could talk to you about it first.”

“It’s a big deal, it’s all anyone can talk about.”

He opened his mouth and then closed it again, hesitating at voicing the concerns in head. “It doesn’t feel real.” He admitted. “I’ve waited for this for so long, what if I can’t do it? What if I’m a terrible leader and they don’t actually let us debut in the end.”

Your heart ached for him, you understood the anxiety of this better than most. The added stress on top of being a long standing trainee was often that people expected you to excel from all the experience you had gained. The added pressure on top of that never helped.

You stepped forward and rested your hand gently on his arm. “It’s because you’ve waited so long that you’re going to be able to do it. You know you can do this, don’t doubt yourself now when it’s finally happening.”

His eyes met your own, searching for confirmation that you actually believed what you were saying and that it wasn’t just for his benefit. You held his gaze and squeezed his arm. “You’re going to be amazing. I don’t know anyone else who deserves this more. You can do this.”

He nodded and rolled his shoulders back. “I can do this.”

“You can do this.” You squeezed his arm once more before letting go, you walked away to pick up your bag, making the spontaneous decision to leave with him, it wouldn’t do you any good staying here and working yourself to the bone tonight. You waited for him to walk out the door first and flicked the lights off, closing the door behind you. You walked side by side out of the building, enjoying the silence until you broke it.

“You better remember me when you’re famous. I want a front row ticket to your first show.”

Chan threw his head back and laughed properly for the first time that day.

“There’s not a hope of me ever forgetting about you.”

────୨ৎ────

Chan had made his decision that night when he came to find you but he couldn’t act on it then. If he was being completely honest with himself, he’d been walking around in a daze since finding out about the show. He felt like he was watching himself from someone else’s point of view, merely existing for the sake of it. He gave polite thanks to the congratulations, one word answers to deflect when he was cornered with questions about who he would pick and swallowing down the urge to cry at how his life was about to change. He’d be lying if he said he didn’t want to find you straight away to talk to you about it but he knew he couldn’t. He was all too aware of what your schedule was like now, ever since you had finished school the company had you in practice after practice, singing, dancing, rapping. If it wasn’t your own practices then it was the rookies and if it wasn’t the rookies then it was choreographers and idols that wanted your opinion on routines. He’d never tell you but he was scared they wouldn’t debut you because if they did the loss that would come from it would be too great. An unofficial teacher, mentor, choreographer. Not that you weren’t credited for your work but he knew it wasn’t what you wanted.

When he walked into the practice room and saw you dancing, he couldn’t help but long for the comfort and stability of your friendship. Your friendship had come at a time in his life when he was closed off from most. Too dark, too moody and too closed off had prevented others from trying but the night he had barged in on you practising had switched something in him. He saw the possibility there, someone like him, someone that understood him and even though it terrified him, he let you in.

In the years that followed, you had both been a constant support to each other. An unshakeable presence in each other’s lives. The idea that he would have to leave you behind in order to pursue the opportunity in front of him made him feel ill.

Not that he would ever say it to you though.

He could imagine what you would say, the chastising, the lecture of how he needed to forget about you and move on. This was his chance and he needed to take it. Take it and run, leave you behind and don’t look back.

An impossible task.

If he had thought about it more carefully, he would have asked you first. He would have sat you down and explained his plan, how he thought it could work and what you thought about the whole situation.

He did none of that.

Instead he marched into JYP’s office, fuelled by panic and fear at the thought of his life moving on without you in it. The idea of you becoming disconnected and a person who would be referred to as ‘someone who he used to know’ is what drove him to send the email at 3am requesting an urgent meeting. He spoke almost feverishly about what an asset you would be, how much you could contribute to the group, you’d known him for years, you both understood each others work styles, you would be strength in dancing that he was lacking in. He would be able to produce and could trust you fully for choreographing. It wasn’t a want to have you in the group, it was a need.

JYP stayed silent, taking in the rambling. He took an opportunity to speak when Chan finally took a breath. He held up his hand to stop him starting on another rant again. “I think you’ve made your point.”

Chan shifting uncomfortably in his chair, eyes glancing at the clock on the wall and he felt his face start to burn when he realised just how long he had been rambling for.

“I can see you feel passionate about Y/N joining. I won’t lie to you, I have my reservations about this. The plan was for a boy group, we have no plans to start debuting co-ed groups.”

Chan opened his mouth, ready to go off again on how much of an asset you could be.

“But…” JYP continued. “I do also appreciate that I told you could choose who you wanted for this so if you believe that she’ll be a strong contender for you, I’m inclined to trust you.”

The room tipped and Chan gripped the sides of his chair. The metal dug uncomfortably into his hand but he forced himself to grip it tighter, needing the stabilisation and grounding that it gave him.

“I want to speak to her first. Bring her here and we can discuss it more.”

Chan nodded, bowed and practically fell out the office door. He was stunned at himself for what he had just done, now he needed to find you. Clearly JYP was under the impression he had discussed this with you first, that would’ve been the smarter thing to do but it was too late for that kind of logic now.

Chan tore through the corridors of the building, by chance you had sent him a copy of your schedule weeks ago when he needed you for something. He was in autopilot, his legs carried him towards the room you would be heading into. He spotted your head in the crowd and like all of his decisions so far, he acted first and would kick himself for it later.

“Y/N!” He voice carried down the hallway.

Your head snapped around, along with the others who were going to train. He pushed past the embarrassment and forced his way through the crowd with muttered apologies.

“I need to talk to you.”

“I’m about to go into practice, can it wait?’

He shook his head, he spun on the spot searching for somewhere to speak to you. In the end, he settled for the staircase. He gripped your arm and pulled you behind him, ignoring the noise you made and being pulled with no warning.

“What is going on?”

“Do it with me.” His eyes were feverish and he was hot and clammy to the extent that you actually put your hand onto his forehead. “Are you ok?”

“I’m fine.” He pulled your hand off him but kept a tight grip on your fingers. “Do it with me. The survival show. Join the group. It doesn’t feel right to do it without you. I don’t want to do it without you.”

Your jaw dropped, caught so off guard by him concerning you with this that you were rendered speechless (which was a hard thing to do), in the back of his head he was momentarily impressed with himself and made a note to bring it up again later.

“But it’s a boy group. What about the others? What about JYP? What about-” You had found your voice again, words falling out rapidly that if it was anyone else in front of you they would find it hard to keep up.

“I don’t care.” Chan cut you off. “I don’t want anyone there who has a problem with you and I don’t want anyone there if it means you can’t be. I need you for this.”

You ran your hands through your hair, tugging it on it nervously. “What about JYP? He told you it would be a boy group on the survival show, he won’t be happy about this.”

“That’s why I needed to speak to you. He already knows, he wants to speak to you now about it. That’s why I needed you now.”

His grip on your hand was still tight, his gaze unwavering, searching your face for any clue about what you were thinking.

“Do it with me.” He pleaded.

“Ok.” You breathed, your brain was running at a 100 miles an hour and it was all you could get out.

“Ok?” He asked, needed you to say it again.

“I think you’re insane for this but ok. Ok, I’ll join the survival show.”

Chan stared at you for a moment, desperately searching for any sign of doubt or uncertainty but when he found none he let your hand go and flung himself at you. His arms wrapped around your shoulders and he pulled you in, jumping and cheering.

“Ok let’s go, we can’t keep him waiting.” He picked your bag up and settled for grabbing your hand again to pull you down the hallway back to the office. Not that you needed to be pulled though, you kept up with his pace allowing the excitement to settle in that not only were you about to get your chance, you were getting it with you best friend.

────୨ৎ────

Taglist: @m-325 @imeverycliche @mythicmochi @hynjnnie @mbioooo0000

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vantaeries · 1 year ago

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YOUR FUTURE SPOUSE : PICK A PILE

FIRST IMPRESSION VS AFTER THEY KNOW YOU

PILE 1 PILE 2

PILE 3 PILE 4

Hello everyone ! I'm Rin! I'm an intuitive tarot reader. It's been almost one and a half since I've been learning about tarot, divination and astrology so I decided to channel general reading for everyone! It's my first public reading ever, so hopefully you like it

Disclaimer : This is a general reading. It may or may not resonate with you. Please take what resonates and leave what doesn't. Remember, the energies can change from time to time. So pick wisely.

How to pick : Close your eyes, take a deep breath and clear your mind. Trust your intuition and choose a pile that you are most drawn to.

PILE 1

At first, they see you as a person they are willing to risk it all for. Anyone who doubts you, your FS is willing to go up against anyone for you. They see someone who is strong for learning from your past mistakes. Due to this, they see you as someone they somewhat fear. 'I want to know them, but what if they reject me? What if they misinterpret my intentions toward them?' They feel stuck. One moment they want to approach you, but then they are afraid to because you are intimidating to them.

After they get to know you better, they start to see you as someone who brings a lot of excitement into their life. They are obsessed and passionate about you! Don't be surprised if they start to become more flirtatious and clingy. Your presence brings a lot of transformative experiences and forces them to step out of their comfort zone or remain stuck in the past.

PILE 2

They think you're driven and hardworking, focused on your future. But because you're so into your work, they feel a bit distant from you and wonder if you're really right for them. Still, they're hopeful they can break down your walls and get to know you better.

As they learn more about you, they realize you're the one they've been searching for. You make their life feel magical, and they're falling for you even more. They start to see they misjudged you at first and want to take their time to be sure. They like you a lot, but they need a bit more time before committing fully. Until then, they see this relationship moving towards something serious, like getting engaged or married.

PILE 3

This person is clearly infatuated with you and sees you as their perfect match. However, they may place unrealistic expectations on you, causing you stress with their demands. They come across as somewhat obsessed with you, finding you incredibly attractive and wanting to exert control. Yet, you stand firm in your strength and maturity, refusing to be manipulated.

When they realize they can't easily sway you, they may begin to distance themselves and keep secrets. You don't need to rescue or change them; instead, show them your strength and worth. As they reflect on their mistakes and change for the better, they'll come to understand and appreciate you more deeply

PILE 4

They view you as an option among several others, still undecided on whether to approach you. Oh! They are a player. You are unapproachable to them because you are playing hard to get but it's just you want to enjoy your single phase. They don't have any strong feelings towards you until they learn more about you. It was your personality that made them attracted to you.

Your strong personality intrigues them, prompting a sense of urgency to pursue you before someone else does, possibly leading to impulsive decisions. It's possible this attraction is one-sided, as some of you may be content with your single status and not anticipate their advances, potentially resulting in rejection. Nonetheless, they're determined not to give up and will strive to impress you, especially in terms of financial achievements, hoping to change your perception of them. They feel insecure and jealous seeing you with others, fearing they may fall short of your standards, prompting them to work hard to improve themselves.

Take care y'all

#tarot reading #tarot #tarot community #free tarot #pick a pile #pick a card #pac reading #tarotblr #divination #future spouse

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jirsungs · 6 months ago

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first halloween... gone wrong? | dms drabble #4

word count: 1.6k words

pairing: drummer!jisung x girlfriend!reader

synopsis: halloween was never your favorite. you would choose christmas over it in a heartbeat, but with your dorky drummer boyfriend who absolutely loves it never leaving your side, you might just tolerate the spooky holiday. (set in the drum me, stupid universe but can be read as a standalone!)

warnings: a knife is mentioned, the dms!couple is flirty and GROSS, but most of this is just fluff.

a/n: HIIII 😭 jirsungs nation, rise! it's been 2 weeks since any story related post has been uploaded, and i just want to deeply apologize for not being here ): i missed writing and putting my delusions down in a google doc. but i hope you guys enjoy this short drum me stupid drabble and missed these cutie patooties as much as i did ☹️ as always, feedback is ALWAYS loved and appreciated! happy reading <3

You were never fond of Halloween. Sure, you loved being able to go all out in costumes and go to Halloween parties with your friends, but you knew immediately that once those plans were over, you were left in your own accompaniment once again.

Some people would be joyful with spending the rest of their nights after parties and such alone, but you? You were used to the party scene and loved it when it never ended. Lucky for you, your dorky boyfriend of a few months, Park Jisung, always kept the party going.

“Hey, have you guys seen Ji?” You asked Ningning and her boyfriend, Jeno, after finally spotting them dancing together on the dance floor. Your voice was louder than usual due to Michael Jackson's Thriller bumping from the party speakers.

“No, we thought he was with you." Ning looks over to Jeno. “I thought he came with you and the guys.”

You both wait for Jeno's reply, but he just shrugs. “He was supposed to, but he was the last one to get ready. If anyone knows where he is, that's Chenle.”

You click your tongue. “I figured. I'm going to keep looking for him. Thanks, guys!”

Ning’s shout of “Good luck!” was the last thing you heard before you committed to walking through the crowd of musty bodies. You were surprised at how many people went all out on their Halloween costumes this year. Your surprise wasn't a bad thing though; if anything, you loved it.

You almost second-guessed your choice of costume. With you and Ning being the only girls in the group, you felt that it was right if the both of you matched. The angel costumes were cute; you were wearing a black tight dress while she wore white, but taking a look at the decided costumes this year, you began to feel basic.

Once you're out of the crowd, you spot Haechan, Mark, and Yeonjun in the corner. You take notice of Yeonjun trying his best to impress some girl while the two boys next to him silently judge, taking occasional sips out of their red solo cups.

Haechan, in his Pennywise makeup and attire, sees you walking towards them, tilting his head at your costume. “What are you supposed to be? A demonic angel?”

Mark snickers at his friend's comment, which you pout at. “No. I'm just an angel who happens to wear black. And says you, Pennywise, isn't your costume like... super basic?”

Haechan gasps, his hand on his chest for the dramatic effect. Mark rolls his eyes and answers your question instead.

“Every year, the Rockway guys do a group costume. This year, we somehow decided on iconic horror movie killers.”

“Ahhh… So, that explains your Leatherface mask.”

With a nod of his head, Mark replies with a “Yup.”

You glance back at the party, and the sudden remembrance of why you came up to them in the first place hits you. “Oh! By the way, have you guys seen Jisung? I literally can't find him anywhere.”

Your body physically sulks at their answers, telling you they haven't seen him in a while. With your hope slowly decreasing and the urge to ditch the party increasing, you decide to call him one last time. If he doesn’t answer, you’ll cut the party short and head home, unfortunately finding the comfort of your bed more enjoyable than being here. You loved the company of your friends, but it bummed you out that you haven’t seen your boyfriend all night after him telling you that he’ll be here.

After bidding your goodbyes to the group and giving Jeno the responsibility to get Ning home safely, you make your way to your car. It's late October with the breeze finally coming through, resulting in you rubbing your arms in hopes for warmth. As you walk, your ears pick up on the sounds of your heels clicking against the sidewalk cement until they pick up another pair of footsteps near you. At first, you don’t sweat it, already aware of the scattered groups outside of the frat.

But as you walk more down towards your car, the shuffling footsteps don’t leave you. Okay, you’ve had enough of this. Your slight irritation was slowly increasing due to this sudden interruption of your plans to waste the rest of your night away by changing out of this angel get-up and watching comfort films.

The only person you craved to see you in this costume was nowhere to be found, anyway. Finally turning around, you face the person but stay near your car for safety reasons.

“Who are you, and why do you keep following me?” You ask.

You didn’t mean to have your words come out sharply, but when you found out your culprit to be someone in a Ghostface costume, it only made you roll your eyes.

“I don’t mean to be rude, but if you’re just here to mess with me, is it okay if you can choose someone else? I really don’t have the energy for this.”

A beat passes and still no response from the person. It was almost as if their feet were stuck in the cement; you were starting to feel chills at the creepy mask staring back at you. But then, your brain starts to put the pieces together.

The replay of what Mark told you earlier back at the party plays in your head. “Every year, the Rockway guys do a group costume. This year, we somehow decided on iconic horror movie killers.” Would it be a coincidence that Jisung, who you haven’t seen all night, just happens to be right in front of you?

Your face softens at the thought of the mysterious Ghostface being your boyfriend. “Ji, baby, if that’s you, I’m going to smack you. Where have you been all night? I called you three times.”

Still no answer, but now they were slowly walking towards you, revealing what they were holding behind them to be a knife. From where you’re standing, you couldn’t tell if it’s real or a fake replica, but that doesn’t stop your grip on the driver seat handle tightening, ready to pull on it and get the hell out of here.

But you try one last time. “Okay, quit it. This isn't funny.”

By this point, the wondering thoughts of whether this was Jisung or not cloud your mind. You’re now close to each other, and the Ghostface still hasn’t said anything.

You know what? Fuck it! You’re not dying today!

You tug the car door open, ready to rush inside, but the masked John Doe shuts the door before you can. Their gloved hand doesn’t budge on the door, making their body lean against it and impossible for you to get inside.

The fact that they haven’t shoved the knife into your body by now has you suspicious and less frightened, but more agitated. Finally, they remove the mask from their face, revealing—

“Hi, pretty angel.”

Your stupid, cheekily smiling boyfriend.

He has no time to lean in and give you an apologetic kiss on the lips before you smack him on the chest and punch his arm. “You motherfucker!”

“Ow! What the hell was that for?”

Your eyes squint at him asking you that, resulting in another punch to his arm. “Don’t ‘what the hell was that for’ me! You scared the shit out of me!”

You’re about to smack his chest again, but Jisung’s reflex hits faster than yours. Not giving you another opportunity to hit him, he’s quick to take hold of both of your wrists, which you immediately try to get out of. You hate (love) how strong he’s been getting. With his constant drumming and going to the gym with the guys on the side, it became more and more difficult for you to get out of his grip.

With your hands unable to move, he takes the chance and plants quick kisses all over your face. Your face flusters quickly with you trying to move away from his lips. He knows he got you when your tugging to get out of his hands stops and you start giggling.

“Ji, stop it!” Your giggles only increase when his kisses do, leading him to drop your hands and place his on your waist instead.

“I missed you. I’m sorry I didn’t answer; I wanted to keep up the bit of scaring you.” He says after giving you a big cheek kiss and pulling you closer to his chest.

You can’t stop the giddy smile forming on your face. “It’s okay. Just never scare me like that again or I will—” you point your pointy finger on his chest, almost in warning, creating some space between you two, “cut your balls off.”

But he pays no mind to your threat, smiling down at you like a loser in love. “Yes, ma’am. Never again.”

You encircle your arms around his waist, looking up at him doe-eyed. “Now, can we please go home and watch comfort movies?”

“Can I first admire how fuckin’ gorgeous you look in this and then go home?”

Oh. You forgot you had this costume on.

Your cheeks heat up at his words. “Language, Park. You could’ve admired this all you wanted earlier if you didn’t leave me alone the whole night.”

He pouts, “Will I at least see this costume some other time, baby?”

"Hmm.” You pretend to think. “I guess, you just have to wait and see.”

“Why wait when I can see it on you tomorrow?” There's a glint in his eyes, and you know it can only mean trouble.

“Easy, drummer boy.”

Little did he know that his almost insulting prank on you sparked an idea in your head. But it’s best to save that for next year, right?

You guess, with Park Jisung by your side, you wouldn’t mind waiting another year to see what other Halloween pranks he has in store for you.

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ghostlyferrettarot · 7 months ago

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♥︎Pick a picture: 🍊🧡Channeled letter from your person🧡🍊

•Pile 1 •Pile 2 •Pile 3

❗️This is a collective reading, take what resonates and leave the rest❗️

✨️Paid Services ✨️ (Natal charts and tarot readings) Open!

🫧Join my Patreon for exclusive content!🫧

🧡If you like my work you can support me through Ko-fi. Thank you!🧡

🍊Masterlist🍊

🍨Pile 1:

"Hello, dear, I hope you are doing well. I am actually feeling a little more cheerful today, although there is always a void without your company. It is amazing how our moods can vary, don't you think? I woke up this morning with a smile, perhaps influenced by the beautiful weather around us. You know how much we love to enjoy the sunshine, the flowers that bloom; today is one of those days that seems straight out of a dream. I would love for you to be here by my side, because your presence transforms everything around me. Life feels more bearable and joyful when you are with me, and that is something I value immensely. I want you to know how important you are to me; sometimes words fail to express the depth of my feelings, but I love you more than you can imagine.

Although there are those who fail to see how wonderful you are, I am lucky to know your true worth. Always listen to your heart and trust your intuition, because it will lead you to what really matters in life. Remember that I will always be here to support you in every step you take.

I love you with all my being..."

🍎Pile 2:

"Hi, I hope you are well. I am sure you are, because you have always been the brightest one in our relationship ;). I want you to know how proud I am of everything you have achieved so far. Sometimes, it can be difficult to see our own successes, especially when we face challenges, but you have overcome so many barriers that this little stumble should not discourage you at all.

It is important to remain confident in yourself and that you never forget how valuable you are. You do not need to depend on anyone or anything to achieve your dreams, and time should not be a source of anxiety. Take the time you need to reflect and move forward at your own pace. Remember that one mistake does not define your path, and it is essential that you enjoy every step of the process.

Take care of yourself and see you soon... will always be here to support you and remind you how amazing you are. I love you with all my heart and I wish you to continue to shine with all your light. Your ability to overcome obstacles and move forward is admirable, and I am here to accompany you every step of your journey.

Your person..."

🫐Pile 3:

"Hello again! Sometimes, in those moments when you seem to not notice me, I am the one who sends you signals. I know it may sound strange, but I want you to know that I am here to support you on your path throughout this life. If there is anything I can do to help you, I will not hesitate to do so, because your well-being is very important to me.

Do not worry, I am working so that we can meet soon, and I know that you are also looking forward to it. What you have achieved in your healing process is truly admirable. Putting your needs before those of others, even if it is a challenge, is a great step that you have taken. I am very proud of you for having made that decision, as it shows a strength and self-love that are essential for personal growth.

You may not believe it, but it is those small changes and achievements that bring us closer and closer to truly knowing ourselves. I'm sure you can feel my presence around you, can't you? I want you to know that I appreciate you deeply and I'm looking forward to the moment when we can see each other.

Take care of yourself and see you soon..."

🧡🍊Thanks for reading and tell me if it resonated 🍊🧡

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rhiannonsknife · 5 months ago

Note

heyyy first of all, i just needed to say that your writing is soooo fucking good like i was genuinely impressed when you said that english isn't your first language because I can't imagine how this could get any better. Also, it isn’t only about the way you write but also the way you just get each character perfectly. That's just... woah, just woah. So yeah, I hope you keep on writing for a long time for the sake of everyone's happiness lol

And lastly, you remembered us about how you also write for the rest of the yellowjackets, not that I don't enjoy the whole "let's give love to all ella purnell's characters" thing going on here buuuut i remembered one scenario has been in my mind for a while and I'd love if you wrote about it.

Shauna, after losing so much to the wilderness, carries this relentless, overwhelming anger that keeps most of the other girls at a distance. Even those who aren't outright scared of her still know better than to get too close. She obviously needs love and comfort, but god help anyone who tries to say that to her. And then r decides to take a shot, carefully inching closer without setting her off. Slowly but surely, r makes progress. First, just being allowed in Shauna's space, then a hand on her shoulder, brushing her hand, maybe even touching her hair. When Shauna finally lets her guard down, r sees just how touch-starved she really is, how deeply she needs someone to just be there, to be her person.

Shauna and r start disappearing for hours, slipping off to somewhere, maybe the airplane, where r can pepper her face with kisses, making her feel safe. And Shauna just lets herself melt in those moments, holding r close.

my mind just goes ogdofgkditwukymg w her

── NO ONE COULD SAVE ME BUT YOU

— summary: shauna shipman needs a hug. that’s it. that’s the summary.

— warnings: hurt/comfort. canon typical dark themes. implied cannibalism (duh). child loss. etc. so: angst. some fluff. did not beta-read this. + i had no clue how to start or end this fic.

— a/n: woah thank you so so much!! i genuinely appreciate that <3 i’m not planning on stopping any time soon! anyway, i hope you like how this turned out!!

out here, she’s lost everything. you all know it, though none of you dares to actually talk about it. it doesn’t come as much of a surprise that she’s beginning to lose herself too. it’s concerning all the same.

shauna still gets her chores done, so it is not like you don’t have her support in this poorly built system, this attempt to keep things under control when -really- all last restraints of control were lost the morning you’d found jackie’s body, buried in the snow, and with all that came after that. the things no one ever speaks about.

perhaps that is why none of the girls have approached her yet: as long as she does what she’s supposed to do, why would anyone try and cross her, or potentially upset her? after what she’s done to lottie, it’s no surprise. sometimes, in moments during which you find yourself staring at her hands for reasons beyond you, you can see the flash of a scar, standing out against the thin skin of her knuckles.

maybe they’re scared of her. or scared of what she’s become, out here. it doesn’t make a difference. maybe you should all be scared of what you’ve become.

either way, it’s not fair. you obviously know that she needs the same comfort some of the other girls have found in each other, whether shauna wants to admit it or not.

so you -with nothing better to do for the most part- make it your mission to be this comfort for her.

at first, shauna gives you short, cold responses when you try to make small talk, but you keep at it. there’s nowhere to go anyway, nowhere she could flee to get away from your slightly awkward attempts to just talk. it’s a first step.

gradually, you notice her replies get a little longer, her posture softens, just slightly, and she doesn’t seem so quick to brush you off. a small sign, but it means you’re beginning to earn her trust. you don’t talk, not always. sometimes, you’ll just linger nearby and watch her prepare the last remaining pieces of meat or sit in the same room as she scribbles in the journal she’s brought from home.

sitting with shauna in silence becomes its own form of closeness; she doesn’t say much, but she lets you be near her. you can’t remember, now that you think about it, when she was last hugged. when she last felt the touch of another person. your heart aches at this realization. could it have been jackie? it already feels like a whole lifetime ago, that she'd been among the group.

over time, she actually starts letting you sit close enough that your legs touch. you hope it’s her way of saying that maybe she doesn’t mind your presence as much as she lets on.

one day, after a particularly hard night, you take a chance and rest a hand on shauna’s shoulder. you’ve noticed, even from a distance, that she doesn’t sleep well. truthfully, no one out here does. but, with your makeshift mattress closest to the spot she’s preoccupied in the farthest corner of the room, you often notice the way she flinches in her sleep, or shoots up in the middle of the night, panting heavily.

when you notice it that night, you slip out of the more or less comfortable ‘warmth’ of your blankets and make your way over to her.

she tenses, but for a moment, she doesn’t pull away. her silence feels like a monumental moment, a sign that she’s slowly starting to let her walls down. you sit like this, hidden by the darkness of the cabin and with none of the others awake, for a long moment. neither of you moves, neither of you even dares to breathe, afraid it’ll pass by as fast as it has come. then, she shrugs away from your grip and mutters: “i’m fine”. she’s not, obviously. but you take it as a small victory. you’ve felt the way she relaxed under your hold, the way she didn’t immediately push you away.

as weeks pass, you notice shauna becoming less and less guarded in your presence. she’s still wary, still sharp, but you can sense the small shifts, a quiet murmur here, a shared look there, that suggest she’s warming up to having you close.

maybe that night is what’s to blame, or maybe she’s genuinely beginning to realize how much she craves the warmth of another person. your warmth.

it’s one of these days where she’s angrily scribbling down words into her journal when shauna reaches a first ‘breaking point’. she’s sitting beside you in silence, the weight of the wilderness and the day pressing down on both of you. the only noise is the angry scrape of her pencil against paper. in a rare moment of boldness, you reach out, brushing a strand of her hair back from her face.

you’re not sure why you do it. but shauna seems so far away from everything, so detached from the reality you live in, that you just want to offer her something grounding.

her first reaction is to freeze, her eyes widening with a flicker of surprise, and you nearly pull your hand away, wondering if you’ve overstepped. but instead, shauna lets out a breath and holds still, allowing you to tuck the strand behind her ear. as your fingers brush her cheek, you can feel her breath catch, her defenses lowering just a little. it’s a brief, fragile moment, but one that feels much bigger to you: an unspoken acknowledgment that maybe, just maybe, she’ll allow more of this.

that’s when things begin to change: shauna starts looking for you after difficult moments, lingering by your side in ways that tell you she needs someone, even if she won’t say it; too stubborn to ever admit it out loud. she lets you take her hand quietly, her thumb rubbing yours a wordless promise that, just for a while, she’ll let you be her safe place.

it becomes routine for you and shauna to disappear to some quiet spot when the cabin feels too heavy. no one has figured you out yet, although you’re sure that they can put two and two together by now: tai has caught your eye, the last time you sneaked off together and lottie has long claimed that the wilderness has its fucked up ways of communicating with her. whether any of it is true or not, something about the glances she shoots in your direction tells you that she knows. that she might even appreciate it, though that could just be because she won’t be the outlet for shauna’s anger anymore.

after a particularly tense exchange with the others, she brushes past you, muttering, “let’s go.” you follow her immediately, of course, and the two of you wind through the forest until you reach the plane’s wreckage. inside, it’s silent and dim, a place that’s somehow managed to become a safe haven. the last reminder of civilization, somewhere far far away from you.

shauna lets herself lean back against the metal frame, shoulders dropping in relief, her usual guarded expression softening as you sit close beside her.

she doesn’t say anything, but her hand finds yours, squeezing it tightly, as if she’s grounding herself in your presence. then, in a rare show of vulnerability, she leans her head on your shoulder, her eyes closing as she lets out a shaky sigh. you wrap an arm around her, pull her closer, and let her melt into you, feeling her tension slowly give way as she buries her face in the crook of your neck.

together, you stay like that for hours, just holding each other. shauna curls into your arms, letting herself fully relax in the quiet. you actually dare to cradle her head and press gentle kisses to her forehead, feeling her melt into your embrace, and trusting you in a way she hasn’t trusted anyone else in a long, long time.

“you’re…you’re way too soft for this place, you know that?” you hear her whispering. she doesn’t stop you, though.

when it’s time to return, shauna doesn’t say a word but gives you a look that says it all: gratitude, trust, and something almost like relief.

even when you’re not together, shauna’s glances toward you become longer, her eyes lingering with something that remains unspoken, as if she’s trying to understand this newfound feeling.

around the others, she is still hesitant to be openly affectionate. in the cabin, it is only late at night, when it’s just the two of you, that she lets herself fall into your arms. It’s the only time she allows herself to be unguarded, clinging to you silently as if afraid you’ll vanish too if she lets go.

that same night, you catch a quiet confession under her ragged breath. she’s facing the other way, letting you spoon her from behind. only this way, does she dare to open up about how everything seems to slip away from her. she’s scared but hides it behind anger and frustration. you’re the first person allowed to see her tears.

you can’t even begin to imagine what she’s going through. all the things she’s been robbed of: girlhood, like all of you. even if you’re ever rescued (which seems less likely with every day that passes) how are you supposed to move on? how are you supposed to live, like none of this ever happened? her best friend, who no one dares to talk about anymore, afraid it’ll bring back the things you’ve done. it’s like she was never here at all which, you think, must be even worse. motherhood, too, though she never even wanted it. no one seems to acknowledge that, out of everyone out here, she might just be the one to have lost everything to the wilderness.

in an attempt to comfort her, you trace mindless shapes against the back of her hand, slowly soothing her back to sleep. the letters of her name, a loopy S, gliding across her scarred knuckles with a tenderness so contrary to everything these hands have done. your own name, next. you hear a gentle chuckle coming from shauna. she knows what you’re doing, of course. you don’t stop.

the outline of wiskayok, as you remember from the map. she doesn’t seem to recognize this one, a little crease between her brows. “home” you tell her quietly and the crease vanishes.

it feels surreal that, somewhere out there, home is still a place. that wiskayok still exists to the people, to your families, your classmates, and everyone else back there. that it’s more than just a fading memory.

“you suck at drawing” she finally manages. it’s the first time you can hear the glimpse of amusement in her voice.

“what? you think you’re any better?” you whisper quietly, wanting it to last.

shauna shifts beside you, and takes your hand with a gentleness you didn’t think she possessed still.

now it’s your turn to lay back and feel. she starts with words. “yellowjackets” she spells out. a small smile flashes over your features as shauna studies your face attentively. then, though it’s harder to make out, she traces the word: “champions”. your heart feels heavy with everything that could’ve been.

shapes are next: a tiny heart, resembling the shape of jackie's necklace, then a simple circle.

"that's a soccer ball" she whispers expertly. for the first time, you laugh. it only lasts a short moment before you remember where you are, and that the others are trying to sleep just a couple of meters from you.

you fall asleep with her hand in your own, as both of your eyes grow too tired and you drift off together.

other nights, when she’s fast asleep and -for once- doesn’t seem haunted by nightmares, you find yourself watching over her. it’s the only time you get to see her the way she’d once been: when her features aren’t tense or pained, but relaxed. when she’s the girl you met at the very first soccer practice years ago, who hasn’t known any of the things that’ll happen to her in this lifetime. you stay up all night, only realizing how much time has passed when light starts spilling into the cabin and she stirs up.

you know shauna hates being pitied. so while you do feel for her, instead of asking if she’s okay, you just stay close, offering your warmth and presence. when shauna’s frustration bubbles over, she lets herself scream or cry in your arms, knowing you won’t turn her away. you hold her tightly all through the waves of emotions, murmuring quiet reassurances, and she clings to you, even as she struggles to accept that someone genuinely cares.

“everyone else… they don’t understand. they couldn’t. but you-“ she murmurs softly. “you’re the only one who sees me. the only one who wants to.”

shauna begins to show subtle signs of protectiveness over you, too: always looking out for you and offering the little comforts she can manage. even though her gestures are often quieter than yours, and less obvious, she's found her own way of showing she’s come to care for you, and that she’s willing to fight for you as much as you’re willing to be there for her out there!! <3

#˙💌 ̟ !! ─ my works #shauna shipman #shauna shipman x reader #shauna shipman x female reader #shauna shipman x fem!reader #shauna shipman x you #yellowjackets #yellowjackets x reader #yellowjackets x you

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walkingnearfoxes · 2 months ago

Text

The Space Between the Lines (Homelander x Reader) - Chapter 3

1.7k words. 18+. Warnings for stalking and the Homelander being horny. She/Her Teacher Reader.

There are a dozen teachers who would kill for this job. You’re just not sure that you’re one of them.

The Homelander had been watching you for weeks.

He didn't have much of a choice. He clearly couldn't trust Ashley and her merry band of mediocrity to pick an educator for Ryan. These "teachers" brought to him were either idiots, ugly as goddamn sin, or too busy shitting their pants at the sight of him to educate his son. One bald and sweaty winner was all three; he took care of that one. That dumbass wouldn't be teaching anyone any time soon.

Clearly, to ensure the best possible future for his son, the Homelander needed to step in. He looked at the curriculum. He re-mapped the lessons with wide-eyed instructional designers. He looked at the resumes. He burned the resumes. He asked Ashley whether she was picking these fuckers out of the sewers or the prisons.

And then, to her luck, she found you.

At first, he wasn't very impressed. You were young, first of all. Educated, sure. Cute, even. But young. Weren’t the best teachers supposed to be ancient? Set in their ways?

"She won an award for education, sir," Ashley had offered at his evident ambivalence. Your file was displayed across the screens of the conference room. The Homelander sat back in his usual chair, gloved fingers drumming at the arms.

He rolled his eyes. "Did she win by having a fucking pulse? Honestly, Ashley, after the zombies you sent me-"

But then she clicked on the video that came with your award profile. It showed a clip of one of your lessons - an introduction to the War of 1812 with a rambunctious group of middle schoolers. He would have fried them immediately, but you were the image of calm.

It was the way you held yourself that caught his attention. You had energy, but you were always in control. You answered each question the little shits had for you concisely and even joked with one or two of them. When a student reached for the cell phone bulging in their jean pocket, your glare across the room was enough to stop them and give you a mumbled apology.

You cared. You cared deeply.

He stared at the screen for another minute, his gaze following you across the screen. Finally, he nodded. "Bring her in."

Ashley looked like she might just come from relief. "Absolutely, sir," She breathed and turned to the computer for all of two seconds before her dirt brain got distracted. "I-I should mention, she doesn't have a background in math or science-"

"Oh, boo hoo." The Homelander drawled as he stood. "Now we won't know how a plant fucks itself. Half that shit isn't real, Ashley. Just bring her in."

He didn't take part in the interviews. He had actual work to do and lives to save. The notes that Ashley gave him were all things he already knew. You were quick, intelligent, and wanted to make a difference. No shit. He didn't need an hour-long conversation to know that. He knew that keeping an eye on you was much better than any performance task. He did the actual work.

It was comical to him how little people paid attention. He was invisible to all the ants if he didn't want to be spotted. He easily flew from building to building, neighborhood to neighborhood, all to learn more about cute, unsuspecting little you. You weren’t hard to find; Vought had all of your information before you even applied.

His findings were boring as fuck at first. You had a small group of friends, you read all the fucking time, but you kept yourself in shape. He appreciated the last part, at least. But you weren’t as refreshing as he thought you would be from the teaching video. The only thing that slightly caught his curiosity was the mysterious relationship to your family. Your mother called about twice a week - sometimes more. From his x-ray vision and superior hearing through the ancient walls of your apartment, he learned enough to know your family didn't live far away, but you made no effort to visit them. Every time your mother called, he saw your lips thin and your eyes narrow. You usually were doing something else while speaking to her - browsing the Internet, pacing the living room, even punching a pillow. Why, he wondered? Maybe mommy and daddy were neglectful of you. A favored sibling, maybe? Drugs? There are limitless possibilities, but you never spoke about it to anyone. Was it a minor issue then, or were you so selfless that you didn't want to bother anyone with your problems? His mind drifted to the matter more than once. He didn’t quite comprehend what would make someone distance themselves from their blood when it was so close at hand.

Then, there was the run.

You very stupidly liked to go for runs at night. Alone. With headphones on. It was like you were asking to be gutted. Sure enough, only about two weeks into his watch, a mindless oaf of a man found you at a stoplight. From his standing perch on a nearby rooftop, his body cloaked in shadow, the Homelander rolled his eyes.

Was he going to have to save you already? Christ.

But then, he noticed your movements. The man was to your back, but you had already turned off your music and lowered your headphones. You already knew he was there.

"You lost, baby girl?" The man murmured, stopping a mere five inches from your back. "I can bring ya home and warm ya up..."

You turned to look at him, and the smile on your face - a grin full of teeth - wasn't polite. It was a warning. "I'm just fine, buddy. Now walk away."

The man bristled - he had a good foot of height on you and about three times the fucking body mass - but then your smile disappeared. The Homelander saw the way your eyes changed. There was something darker. Something he was intimately familiar with.

The man swallowed, stuffed his hands in his pockets, and shuffled backward. "Right. Sorry. Ma'am."

You watched him for a long moment, ensuring he truthfully intended to leave you alone. Once you were sure, the Homelander watched as you put your headphones back in and carried on as if nothing had happened.

Oh.

You weren't just a cute little teacher. There was something else.

His lips twitched upwards in approval. There was another twitch down south, but that wasn't too surprising. He’d always admired strong women. He could take care of that later; the few “accidental” peaks of you in your shower had given him plenty of material.

So, he told Ashley to hire you and continued to keep an eye on you. It wasn't out of surveillance now; it was out of curiosity. He didn't see another glimpse of that side of you again, but that would come with time. You weren't perfect. Your clothes were boring, you couldn't nail down a signature scent, and he loathed your roommate.

But that look. He could do something with that look.

And so he sat and watched as you taught his son. He had to admit that you were good. Ryan was paying attention, and he was smiling. He was smiling a little too much - he certainly never smiled that much with him - but what was important was that he was learning. What was also important was that you were slowly becoming more at ease. You had stopped your adorably nervous glances at him about 20 minutes ago, and adrenaline had stopped obnoxiously pumping through your body. He could barely detect the scent anymore.

You were explaining how the colonists had grown independent from Britain when Ryan's brows began furrowing.

You, the diligent educator that you are, notice right away. "What's up?"

"I'm...a little confused," Ryan admits.

You smile encouragingly. "Well, share with the class. It's my job to help with that."

Ryan points to his textbook. The Homelander can see from across the table that he's touching an image of a plantation. "You said George Washington had slaves?"

You hesitate, and your eyes move to glance at the Homelander. He says nothing, the same polite smile on his face. You look back to Ryan. "That's right."

Ryan's frown deepens. "He wanted the colonies to be free but he had slaves?"

Uh oh.

The Homelander laughs, and it's the first sound he's made this entire lesson. Ryan meets his eyes immediately, and you barely mask a flinch. "Whoa there, buddy," He says, standing up from his place at the table. "It's a little more complicated than that."

There's barely a beat after his words before you reply. "Yeah, their whole idea of freedom is a bit...convoluted."

The Homelander blinks and raises a brow. "What do you mean, teach?"

Your smile is polite, but your eyes are a bit less so. "I mean that Ryan is making a good point. It's a bit hypocritical."

He scoffs and steps forward, his hands moving to his hips. "Are you calling our founding father a hypocrite?"

There it is. There's that look in your eye. Without missing a beat, you nod your head. "Yes."

He hadn’t expected to see it again so soon - certainly not directed at him. But there it is.

There is a long silence interrupted only by Ryan's fingers anxiously tapping against the table. It's death to the Homelander's eardrums, but he doesn't care. He's staring at you, waiting for you to flinch or murmur an apology like all those other mudpeople did. You don't.

"Well, on that exciting note, I think we can call it for today," He announces, turning to give his son a warm smile. "Ryan, you earned yourself some Tournament of Heroes time."

Ryan turns to look at you - a decision that makes the Homelander's fists clench on his hips - and you smile back at the boy. "Same time tomorrow?"

Ryan smiles shyly back. "Yeah. Definitely." He stands up slowly, closes his notebook, and looks at his father. "Do you wanna come play, Dad?"

The Homelander grins. "Sure thing. You set up the VS5 and I'll be there in a jiff," But he looks back at you with a wink. "I just gotta have a word with Miss Benedict Arnold here before she rushes out on me."

The way your pulse skyrockets makes his heart sing.

#the boys #homelander #homelander x reader #homelander x you #my writing #turns out grieving makes it easier to write for this weirdo

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sgojoenthusiast · 2 years ago

Text

clingy.

✧.* gojo satoru x reader

summary:

gojo can't stand when he's away from you and you're not here to help him out.

cw: not proof read!!!, gojo is VERY clingy & slightly obsessed w reader (who wouldn't be???), nsfw, fluff if you squint, smut, use of 'baby', fem reader, dry humping, nudes, degradation & humiliation, penetration, not much prep tbh, crying, teasing, choking, dom reader/ sub gojo.

word count: 1.8k

likes, comments and reposts are deeply appreciated! <3 enjoy.

-`♡´-

Gojo can't handle being away from you. Not just because he misses your smile, your voice, making you laugh, watching movies with you or even just sitting in silence with you. Because yes, he does miss that stuff, but also because ever since being with you, no fist or toy could possibly get him off like you do.

Sure, if he tried, he definitely could get himself off. But, he refuses. Only you can make him feel good, and he is set on that fact.

The feeling of knowing that it's your hand. He's under your control. It stimulates him in a way no one else could because, simply enough, they weren't you. They didn't have your delicate hands yet harsh grip. They didn't have a voice like honey or skin like heaven.

So, when one of you are away for a mission, he’d call you every night, begging for you to help him. He's explained to you so many times how much he struggles to be away from you during times like this, yet you never quite understand him.

However, on this date specifically, you had made plans with your friends to go to a restaurant and catch up. You had only planned to stay out for a few hours and stupidly thought Gojo would be fine by himself.

1 new notification. 2 new notifications. 5 new notifications. 11 new notificati-

"Hey do you wanna get that? It seems important." one of your friends said, as you scrambled to silence your phone.

"It's fine, it's just Satoru. He's probably wondering what he's supposed to eat tonight or something. He can wait a few hours."

Attachment: 3 images.

You didn't think much of it, often he would send you photos of his face along with a message similar to "look at what you're missing babe???"

What you didn't expect, was a picture of a very prominent bulge in his sweatpants, his hand palming it. The two after that, showed his hardened cock in his hand, precum dripping down it as his thumb ran over his swollen tip.

You immediately turned your phone off and looked to the side of you to check your friend hadn't seen the image. Luckily, she was immersed in a conversation with your friends sitting opposite you.

You took a shaky deep breath, and reopened your phone to check what the other eleven messages were.

"babyyyy:(( wya?? i'm so lonely" "fuckfuckfuck just saw the vid you took of us last night baby. come home." and then several other messages along the lines of him begging you to answer him, and all the stuff he wanted to do to you. Of course, by the looks of things and how pissed you were at him spamming you messages like this, you'd be doing most of the controlling tonight.

Incoming call from Toru<3

Your friends looked at you with concern. Your shaky breaths were doing nothing to help portray a collected composure. “Sorry- I'm just gonna take this real quick." Each of them gave you an understanding look as you walked out to the back, where no one could see or hear you before you answered his call.

"Gojo, I am so unbelievably pissed off at you right now, don't even try to pretend you have no clue where I am 'cause you know damn well it's right there in the fucking calendar."

Heavy panting and strained whines was the only response you got for a solid five seconds before he replied with desperate moans and pleas.

“I can’t- I just can't on my own! It's not enough, I need you pleaseee-“

"'Toru, I'm out with my friends! I'll be home in like three hours, can't you just wait--"

"Three hours?!" he gasped dramatically. To anyone else, they would have thought he was bleeding out from his whines, cries and the way he was pleading you to leave like his life depended on it.

"Yes, Satoru, three hours." you looked around, seeing if there was anyone listening in nearby before continuing. "Satoru, you can either wait three hours like a good boy, and I'll let you come when I come home. Or, you can continue calling me whilst I'm out with my friends and I won't let you come for a week. Fuck that, i wont even fucking touch you for a week. Now, which is it, Gojo?"

With the combination of you using his last name and your terrifying threat, his eyes widened as he mumbled out a quick apology and immediately hung up. He craved you from a distance yet waited excitedly in anticipation for the night’s upcoming events.

Whilst you knew your threat was harsh, you also knew it was a completely empty one. Because, despite your annoyed tone, hearing Gojo whine on the other side of the phone had you pressing your legs together and biting your lip. Not even you could spend an entire week without touching him once.

However, it did the trick. For the entirety of the time you spend out with your friends, you didn't receive a single notification with his name on it (you just know he's saved at least twenty videos so he can show them to you whilst you're cuddling later). It was as if he's erased himself completely or destroyed his phone just to secure being able to feel you against him later.

Exactly three hours after your call, he waited patiently on the sofa, his leg bouncing up and down eagerly. He glanced at the clock maybe seven or eight times before he heard your keys in the door.

As you walked in, you barely had time to take off your coat and hang it up before Satoru's lips were on yours with a fervent intensity. His hands clung to your body desperately, attempting pathetically to get your clothes off before you pushed him onto the sofa.

"Patience, Satoru. You were being so naughty earlier." he looked up at you with wide eyes.

"But I didn't message or call you once!" he pleaded.

Gently, you cupped his face in your palm, running your thumb along his cheek. "I know, baby." you mocked.

Suddenly, Gojo grabbed you by the waist, pulling you on top of him. "You told me- hahh- I could- c-cum" he muttered, grinding his clothed dick against you helplessly. Your hand reached behind his head as you grabbed a fistful of his hair, tugging hardly.

"Fuck- why would I let you cum after pulling shit like this, huh? Shit-" you moaned at the feeling of him rutting against you.

"Cause I'm, fuuckk, not letting you go-" he mumbled into your shoulder as he continued to thrust himself against you.

"Wouldn't you rather come inside me, baby? Hmm? You look fucking pathetic right now," you laughed, tauntingly. "Seriously, aren't you embarrassed, Gojo? Humping me like a fucking dog. You've got no control over this pathetic dick, do you? You're just some slut desperate for attention."

He stopped moving at your degrading words as he buried himself in your shoulder. You smiled at your victory, as you commanded him to lay back on the sofa and take his clothes off. You did the same, as you straddled his lap whilst he looked up at you in awe.

"Pleasepleaseplease- I've needed this all fucking day." he begged, tears welling up in his eyes as he bucked his hips up into your own.

You grabbed his dick carefully, stroking it slowly and rubbing the tip with your thumb. He moaned at the feeling of your hands, begging you without shame just to put it in and fuck him like he deserves.

However, your malicious teasing never relented, as you continued to give him very light touches, and very occasionally a small lick from between his legs.

He lay in front of you, heaving breathlessly as his mindless babbles grew into ridiculous moans and incoherent begs. His hair was splayed over his forehead and stuck to him because of the sweat, but never had you seen a more beautiful display as his chest rose up and down. His lips were closed in a slight pout, and his eyes were half shut from the constant edging, his arm covering them slightly.

However, his eyes immediately flew open and his hand grabbed desperately onto the sofa when you shifted your position to directly above his dick.

You sink down slowly, the pain fading loosely into pleasure over time. You moved your hips up and down slowly, as he gripped tightly onto your waist, urging you to go faster when you could.

Soon, you were bouncing on him relentlessly as his moans and whines intertwined with your own like your fingers which slid up his body to weave into his.

You leaned down, taking his lips into a passionate kiss, silencing the sounds of his thoughtless moans.

His mind was blank with pleasure, the only image was your pussy sliding up and down his dick. He untangled your hands as he ran them up your body and towards your breasts, grabbing and flicking your nipples - trying to make you feel even a fraction of the heaven he was experiencing.

One of his hands trailed down towards your pussy as he began to rub your clit. You gasped at the feeling, one of your hands flying straight to his throat as you squeezed tightly.

Before realising what you had done, you felt Satoru cum immediately inside of you, both his hands moving to grab onto your thighs as he reached his high.

As he lay beneath you, panting, you tilted your head at him curiously with a slight smirk on your lips which screamed "oh?". His face flushed with embarrassment. One, at the fact he had just came without you, and two at the fact that all it took was for you to choke him just a little bit for him to come immediately.

Before you had realised he liked your hands around his neck, you had retracted them, placing them on his chest. You grinned deviously as your hands began to slide up his body, a finger stopping to tilt his chin up so he was making direct eye contact with you, before continuing to wrap your hand around his neck. He groaned lowly at the connection, yet the sharp feeling of being overstimulated took over as you lifted your lips up before slamming them down ruthlessly.

He threw his head back and whined loudly, bucking his hips up into yours. "Cant take it anymore-- fuuuckkk!"

"Hmm? But you were the one who asked me if you could come? I'm giving you what you want, aren't I? Stupid, spoiled brat." you continued to move your hips up and down his cock, knowing if he really wanted you to stop, he'd say the safe word. "Plus, I haven't come yet. You're not gonna be a selfish brat too, are you? Don't you wanna make me come?"

He nodded his head incessantly. "Wanna make you come too..." he panted out breathlessly, bucking his hips up into you and moving his hand back down to your clit.

You continued like that for what felt like hours. He wasn't sure how many times he came, yet one thing was certain, and that was no matter how many hours you spent fucking him so roughly, he still hadn't had enough of your touch as you lay in bed during the dark hours of the night with his head by your chest as he showed you all the funny videos he couldn't send you earlier.

.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。.

☾ ⋆･ﾟ:⋆･ﾟsgojoenthusiast

#fanfic #smut #jjk smut #gojo satoru x you #gojo x reader #gojo fanfic #gojo satoru x reader #jjk fanfic #jjk x reader #jjk x you #gojo x you #satoru gojo x reader #gojo smut #gojo satoru smut #jujutsu kaisen smut #jujutsu kaisen x reader #fluff and smut #gojo fluff #🌙 jujutsu kaisen

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taystarotoverload · 2 years ago

Text

WHO is your Future Spouse?

‼��WARNING‼️: some 18+ & looooottttssss of detail 😮‍💨

☆ this is JUST a general reading so take what resonates leave what doesn’t. we’re going to be diving into 9 different topics about details on who your future spouse is, and some extra little goodies at the end😉

☆ how to PICK A PILE: Breathe in deeply for 3 and out for 5. Meditate on each picture continuing this manual breathing. Ask spirit out loud or in your head “who is my future spouse” and meditate on it. You’ll hear a number or see a number pop into your head, or maybe you’ll feel drawn to a certain pile. whatever works for you go for it! if you’re new to pick a piles this may be difficult at first, but as you read and watch them more and more the process becomes much easier! 😊

☆ DECKS USED:

Tarot:

A.E. Waite Tarot (pile 1) Cat Tarot (pile 2) Wild Unknown (pile 3)

Oracle:

Fairy Wisdom Oracle, Wild Mystic, Romance Angels

☆ lastly thank you thank you to my guides and your guides for offering me and providing me the energy, knowledge, and guidance to do this reading. 🤍

PILE 1

your energy check in:

these are clarifying cards for you and your currently energy, this helps me connect to you further and also makes sure this reading is right for you! <3

the fool - the world - ace of wands - page of swords

so what i’m seeing is you’re 100% a leader. you also love going out, you love the outdoors, you love nature and seeing life for what it’s truly about. i see you’re somebody who doesn’t let the hardships of life run you down and ruin you. i see you’re somebody who is a go getter and isn’t afraid to be adventurous and courageous and step out of their comfort zone. you like being the person you are and you’re not going to let anyone stop you. i’m also seeing that right now you’re in a transition. your life is transforming alot right now, you might be given many job opportunities or travel opportunities and you’re just thinking “wow when did i get so lucky?” lol i’m also seeing that you ?recently? just got out of a really rocky situation or part of your life and this is why your energy is so bright and vibrant. i’m viewing you as the sun pile 1 you seem very extroverted at times. again with the leadership this is what is leading you towards these amazing opportunities. you’re a big helping hand to others and people appreciate you greatly.

oracle: Magic Frog

so even though pile 1 you seem very bright and good energy, you have a bad problem overworking yourself and giving yourself a hard time. i’m seeing that when it comes to your work and the time you spend creating these ideas and being a leader you never seem to put in time for yourself. it’s always “i need to do this i need to do that” spirit is asking you to just chill. that’s a cool way of putting it but relaxing is good for you. especially for right now i’m seeing you just need a nice hot bath, some oils, some wine (if you’re of age😉) and some slow gentle music. don’t be afraid to have fun and have a good time! you don’t have to live in an endless boring cycle where you feel like you’re going nowhere in life, because the universe has so much to offer!

other messages: childlike, green eyes, brown hair, olive skin, pisces, leo, taurus, aquarius, scorpio, white cloth, yellow, sun, golden retriever

Their Energy:

2 of swords - 5 of pentacles - the empress - page of pentacles

so basically this is very much opposite energy here lol. i’m seeing for you pile 1 your future spouse has been through a LOT. they have faced many battles and challenges physically and mentally. in the physical world i’m seeing that they have been perhaps stabbed in the back by people closest to them. or they were manipulated in some way? something to do with friendships here but im seeing that they are someone who has been through a lot. and they’re currently going through their own battles right now but it’s starting to cool down. they may be somebody you’d associate with the rain?? only cause i keep seeing like grey rain clouds and then like the calm after the storm type of thing. your future spouses energy is very introverted which is definitely opposite to yours, because even if you pile 1 are introverted they take the crown lol. they are somebody who doesn’t open up to people quickly and is very very protective of their energy. but do not be mistake because they aren’t weak in any way. they are very strong person. they don’t need your protection or others they know how to protect themselves when needed. they may be a little bit hard headed but it’s not big deal lol… i’m seeing that they are working towards a better future for themselves. they don’t want to stay stuck dwelling on the past but they can’t seem to help it sometimes. they are in dire need of shadow work lol. also off topic but y’all have similar energy in some ways. they’re a very creative person aswell and i was just getting that you could meet them through creative projects.. perhaps through work or some sort of activity. i’m also getting that their energy seems very feminine??? but take what resonated obvi!!

oracle: bubble rider

this is just confirming what i said previously. spirit wants to give your person a helping hand and a push of wisdom. they need to start thinking about themselves in the moment because they’re so worried and fixated on other people that they don’t make time for themselves!!! this is something that they really really need to work on and work through because life is going to throw challenges at them and they’re going to have to learn from it. the picture illustrates a girl looking defeated on a bubble and seems to be curled up towards herself. and this is your future spouse's energy. they need to just open up and be apart of the moment be apart of the world. they need to not be afraid of a little bit of challenge in their life because they will come out stronger.

other messages: feminine, wounded, trauma, fake friends, badass, blonde, curves, aries

your fav things abt your fs:

3 of cups: they are somebody who seems to love close relationships with friends and family. they cherish those close connections. i think when they become comfortable with you they open up a side of them you didn’t know existed. they are honestly a totally different person behind closed doors and it’s something you admire. especially how they treat their family and friends you’re just like ‘where have you been all my life?????’

6 of wands: even though your fs isn’t somebody who is really out there and super extroverted they have these really amazing creative ideas and projects that they bring into light and offer to whatever work they’re putting in. and im seeing that people around them are extremely grateful towards them for it because it offers a lot of things and opportunities for others and also benefits the project. this is something that you admire about them is that they’re just extremely intelligent in what they do.

the lovers: i’m seeing this person has a really good balance between feminine and masculine? like it's honestly pretty attractive to you because you’re like “wow i didn’t know it did that” type of energy haha

10 of cups: they’re very grateful for what people give to them and how they receive things. they aren’t somebody who is stuck up, and is childish in things that they want. i’m seeing that especially when it comes to you they’re very protective towards your emotions and feelings because they cherish you greatly. i see that this relationship will be very new to them or it will be different from what they’ve had in the past.

king of cups: wow okay they’re big on protecting. i'm not seeing overprotective but i’m just seeing that they’re very careful with you. like you’re very precious to them and they just never want to hurt you in any way. very black cat energy if i’m being totally honest haha

their fav things abt you:

knight of swords: so like i said earlier you’re go getters if you want something you’re going to get it and there is no stopping you. i’m seeing that you can be assertive and very blunt and they really like that about you. they really like that you don’t give up easily and can stick up for yourself.

7 of wands: again with the assertiveness. your leadership really shows up when it’s needed and you aren’t afraid of change and making change. you’re somebody who likes to bring facts to the table and defend yourself and what you believe in because to you, that’s what is right. your fs really does admire this about you, and it might influence them a little bit to be as strong and confident as you are. i’m seeing that you might be somebody who is big in being an activist and you really like change. maybe in the work place, your daily life, or just the world. it’s something that you strive to do.

ace of swords: when you are given an opportunity you will take it, but not before you sit and think about it. you aren’t the type to just go into an idea blind, you sit and analyze the outcome to things (this is where overworking could come into the picture) and your future spouse again is influenced by this and intrigued and it’s something they admire about you because in their eyes you’re strong.

ace of cups: you are somebody who is able to express lots of self love and practices self love. this is something you and your future spouse might even do together is practice self love. because again you don’t let the hardships of life run you over and ruin you, you get up and live.

the chariot: you’re probably a very spiritual person and if not spiritual it is something intrigues you. and this goes for any religion but it is something that you defend but also aren’t afraid to express and acknowledge. i think your future spouse could find this to be very educational and often asks you about and it’s something that you’re very willing to sit down and talk about. your interests are always extremely interesting to your fs.

their personality:

2 of wands - page of swords - queen of swords - 5 of cups - 3 of cups - 10 of cups

i’m just getting that this person has alot of love to give. like a lot. they might be really romantic or cheesy at times….?? so they are somebody who can very passionate about their interest and would want to tell you all about it. if they have a creative idea they want to be able to fulfill this desire and treat it in any way. i’m seeing that they’re not so much of a go getter like you, but they aren’t afraid to take action towards the things they want. i am seeing though that they don’t open up well and again are very protective of their energy’s. they aren’t quick to tell you what’s wrong with them and it may have to be something you ‘force’ out of them. sometimes they bottle up their feelings wayyyy too much you have to kind of show them the brighter side of things. i do see that they may struggle with mental health issues and this negatively effects them but it isn’t something that effects the relationship. they don’t let their mental health get in the way of the relationship, which is probably why you will probably have to poke them a little bit to hear what’s the matter lol. I really do feel like their weak spot IS family and friends though. this is probably the biggest influence to what they’ve dealt with in the past and so i’m seeing that close family and friends are deeply cherished and respected. they’re somebody who can have a very cheerful and bright attitude around people they’re closest to. it’s a side that you do really like to see because they’re the type to put on a mask in public ykwim?? they’re very good at hiding that side of them.

how they will make you feel:

5 of pentacles - 8 of wands - the lovers - knight of swords - 3 of pentacles

so what i’m getting is that you may feel very confused at times on how your fs feels. i’m seeing this is because they don’t open up, but since you’re very unaware of it you can feel very left in the dark. i’m seeing they don’t intend to do this and you may ask them “did i do something wrong?” it honestly like breaks their heart lol. this is something that they definitely would need to work on. however they’re easily able to redeem themselves. i’m seeing here that they can be very busy but they’re able to make time for you. when they say something they mean it, so if you guys have a planned date and something comes up they are not rescheduling it. they are doing it that day lol. also i’m seeing that they seem to be more of a listener than a talker and this makes you feel very heard. you may be more of a talker and so you think “oh my god i’m talking their ear off” but they love hearing what you have to say. i’m also seeing that they’re very very protective of you. and this makes you feel very grounded and nurtured. maybe you haven’t felt this way in the past and this person just brings you lots of comfort and joy. they also make you feel confident asfffff. i’m seeing at times you can be very insecure and when you express this to them they’re like “excuse me???” because in their eyes you’re the most perfect human being they’ve ever laid their eyes on. this could also be from them being a romantic they show you how beautiful you are to them… iykwim.

their looks:

the hermit - 10 of swords - the hierophant - 7 of cups - 8 of cups - the tower

so immediately i thought abt their eyes. they might have very sleepy looking eyes or they might look “dead”. their eye color too might be a dark dark brown color. i’m seeing that they could have king eyelashes. their eyes are very prominent. i’m seeing that they could bleach their hair? maybe they have naturally dark hair but they bleach it to be white or blonde. im seeing that their hair could be mid length or could be slightly long. guys could be a bit on the longer side and girls could be a little bit shorter. nothing too short or too long. i’m seeing that they might have very very pale skin… like ghost white. 😭 i’m not seeing dark skin. i am seeing them being fairly short. they’re def shorter than you lol. this person skin is also so??? they for sure have a skincare routine. they have this thing where they have to look good. i’m seeing their style might be a bit edgy but it’s a very unique style. they’re not very alternative or gothic just sort of edgy, but they put together their outfits well. i’m seeing they like to at least look nice wherever they’re going they don’t look ‘musty’ or like they don’t shower. they might be the total opposite of you tbh??? like this is a person people are quick to make assumptions about. and you’re sooooo quick to defend them lol. i’m seeing them as very skinny too. i don’t see them working out so much so they could very skinny and scrawny lol. they’re definitely someone people look at, some people find them to be attractive and some seem to assume a lot about them. but at the end of the day you know them for how they truly are. your fav thing abt them is their eyes tho like it won’t leave my head. tbh they’re kind of intimidating to people.

their love language:

the lovers - wheel of fortune - the empress - 8 of swords - the tower - death

your fs might be a bit of gift giver. they like showering you with gifts. they think about you 24/7 and they want you to know that. i do see acts of service being a big one too. they love helping you, they love being there for you. but pile 1 you are a very independent pile. i’m seeing this might be very annoying to you at times cause you’re like “i got it it’s fine” and your fs is like “no no let me help” this might be something you have to tell them annoys you or makes you feel a bit incompetent BECAUSE you feel like you’re being babied or it comes off as them thinking you can’t do it yourself. which is definitely NOT what their intentions are at all. im seeing words of affirmation being another one too; they love giving you compliments they love making you feel better. they are your shoulder to cry on whenever you need it. they just want to be there for you 24/7 365. they’re so down bad it’s making me sick lol

how they will comfort you:

the hermit - 7 of pentacles - 6 of swords - 8 of wands

i’m seeing that whenever you’re going through something in your life mentally you aren’t the type to seek out help so much. and your future spouse understands this and is very patient with you. also when you’re sick too?? i’m seeing you might be a bit of a crybaby when you’re sick lol and it doesn’t bother your future spouse because all they want to do is protect you. i’m seeing that if you were struggling mentally they wouldn’t bother you with questions but they’d let you know they’re there whenever you need them. they understand more than anyone how it feels, so you can go to them and they will listen. they are honestly an amazing listener. they are really good at giving you guidance and offering you good advice when you need it. i’m seeing they’re the type of person who likes to be very factual and blunt without hurting your feelings, and it’s something that does help you grow and learn especially in the relationship.

First Times:

First Meet: 7 of pentacles - Strength

so the setting is outdoorsy?? i’m seeing something again with work and an activity and i’m seeing that your fs may already work there and this is a transition from your old work to working there. i’m seeing that the energy is very tense with this person. i don’t see you two meeting each other immediately i think it’d be one of those you see then from across the room??? you’d make the first move im seeing lol. i’m also seeing that you immediately find them so incredibly attractive and may ask around about them and to them you don’t catch their eye as much. they could be single when you first meet though but they aren’t really thinking about a relationship.

First Date: 8 of wands - 8 of swords

so i’m ngl i’m getting such awkward energy hahaha i’m seeing that you’re going to feel very excited but also very anxious. this date may be all your idea and so you’re trying your best to woo them lol. i’m seeing also that your person might come off as uninterested at first but believe me they’re just as nervous as you are. i’m seeing they’re trying to impress you as best they can but they’re so awkward lol you’re going to find it very cute. i’m seeing that this date will be very intimate but it will be in a social setting. so i’m seeing that a nice little restaurant. i’m also seeing this could be a thing you guys do at the end of the day?? tbh something you’d see on tv. so a little cliche but also very very romantic. also i’m just seeing so many smiles and love eyes???? y’all are cheesy stop it

First Kiss: Ace of cups - 3 of pentacles

this is so funny to me because both of y’all will initiate the kiss. yk how and please try to understand this, you know how sometimes with first kisses one person initiates the kiss and it’s either a hit or miss. you and your fs will be so down bad that y’all will just feel the energy. like good lord just make out already pls i can’t take this tension. i’m seeing that one of you will start to lean in and the other person is like “hell yea” and they lean in too. like y’all can read each others minds istg y’all are so in tune with each other. your first kiss can be when y’all are alone together?? maybe when yall are having a deep conversation and you guys just bond over something. y’all are so in love at this moment i’m just… wow.

their shadow side:

page of cups - 6 of wands - page of pentacles - 2 of wands - 3 of cups - king of pentacles - knight of pentacles - 9 of swords

i’m seeing that this person can be very selfish. i’m only seeing that this selfish side comes out during conflict. i’m seeing they can be a major know it all about things and can be very “i’m right youre wrong” they can be very childish in the way they think and can be very hard headed. i’m seeing that they have this energy especially when they’re stressed out too, that you really can’t get them to stop thinking like this unless you really humble them. i’m seeing when they’re angry it’s just them acting very childish and very selfish and this can be something that you talk to them about. they’re not necessarily like it towards you but they can definitely be that way towards other people. im seeing they can very childish in what they say if they get into an argument with you, but it’s one of those things where you talk to them like an adult and it snaps them back to reality. they definitely need a reality check from time to time ngl…

Extra Messages!!:

Shaman: keyword: Teacher

trust in divine timing. trust that things are working out towards you and your future spouse. don’t try to rush things, and definitely don’t try to undermine any of spirits work. the universe is working in your favor, so remember to thank the universe everyday. you and your future spouse will be able to heal each others energy and heal that inner child. don’t lose this once in a lifetime connection.

Memory: your past life may be very battled and torn. try to reconcile with your past self and find what parts of you do really need the healing. don’t be afraid of feeling those emotions you buried deep down, they are meant to find you in this lifetime.

Very Soon: You may meet this person very soon or in a matter of a few months. don’t rush this connection. this person will make their way to you when you BOTH are ready. disappointment will only lead you to failure, be grateful for what the universe has to offer you.

what chakra is their weakest: Heart Chakra

what chakra is their strongest: solar plexus chakra

extra key: earth sign, lilac, quartz, past life regression, outside activity, gold, aventurine, yellow jade, yes, african american, you already know them, white, black, foreign, green eyes, 1111, 5555, 9999, street style

your song: let the light in - lana del rey

thank you so so much for allowing me to give you this read and offer guidance on your future spouse! i hope this reading brought you some clarity and opened your eyes about this person. good luck on your journey with love and please like + repost !! <3 feedback is greatly appreciated 🤍

PILE 2

your energy check in:

these are clarifying cards for you and your current energy, this helps me connect to you further and also makes sure this reading is right for you! <3

knight of pentacles - queen of swords - king of cups - the sun

i’m getting that you are a very mature pile. i’m seeing that you’re very intelligent as well. in school you may be honor roll or have been offered many scholarships. i’m seeing that you have a lot of emotional stability. you’re very wise in how you talk to others and people often find themselves coming to you for advice. i’m seeing you may be a bit of a therapist haha i’m also seeing that you could be very wealthy or come from a wealthy family?? or you are just really good with money?? some of you want to be a lawyer…? you’re such a balanced calm energy pile 2 i feel so safe in your presence. you could be very attractive too?? like i see a lot of people have their eyes on you. you’re not afraid of expressing your boundaries to people as well, and i see you’re very careful with who you consider close friends. you have a very positive outlook on life. you’re very good at manifesting too.

oracle: too many dragons

you may have been drawn to pile 1. i see you are a very hardworking pile. you are somebody who is constantly busy constantly doing something. i see that you live off a routine and a schedule, and you’re the type to not be so big with change and getting out of routine. i think this can often scare you and stress you out. don’t be afraid of a little change once in a while. change is good! spirit wants you to be able to express sides of yourself without fear and without embarrassment and disappointment. it’s okay to be a little silly at times, you don’t always need to be serious.

other messages: leo, dark hair, brown hair; freckles, sharp brows, curly hair, tanned skin, dark skin, long fingers, muscles, working out, 1212

their energy:

ace of swords - five of wands - seven of pentacles - the sun

i’m seeing that you and your future spouse are honestly very similar in ways. i’m seeing that’s how you two really bond and connect is because you both have shared interests and can connect on things like that together. i’m seeing your fs can be a little… sassy. they have a little bit of an attitude to them and tend to get into conflict easily. i’m seeing that you might actually really like this about them because you find it cute. it’s just small things they do. they may make sassy remarks that makes you turn your head like “what did you just say?” this person also might be opposite to you when it comes to money. i see they may like a little bit of a shopping spree… and aren’t so good at saving money like you. this is something that you could easily teach them and help them work out. i’m also seeing that your future spouse could be very spiritual. i’m seeing they could be into tarot and astrology and if not that they are big on religion. this could be something you two bond over as well.

oracle: when fairies go bad

i’m seeing that your future spouse is somebody who hides alot of things. this might be a bit of a shock when they mention something that has negatively affected them in the past. they’re somebody who can put up a front and seem like they’re absolutely perfect and then they open up to you and you’re like “i would’ve never expected this” and this is exactly their goal they hate when people try to read them. i’m seeing that they are very protective over themselves and their energy and so theyre not exactly willing to open up completely. this is something they need to work on and control because keeping secrets and hiding things especially from you could cause conflict and issues in the future. even if they have no bad intentions.

other messages: leo, earth sign, green eyes, dark skin, white teeth, vampire fangs???, childlike

your fav things abt your fs:

the fool: your future spouse is able to get up and have fun. it’s never a dull moment with them because they’re just full of so much energy and they’re able to have fun wherever they are. if you have an idea or want to go out with them they are more than willing to do it. i see that they love adventures and love seeing what the world has to offer them. they may be really connected with nature.

temperance: again what i was saying earlier i’m seeing that your person could be very spiritual or very religious in some way. i see they love to talk about their beliefs and offer guidance, and they’re not annoying about it at all. but when you ask them questions about it, they become very passionate and go on little rants and tangents lol. i’m seeing that to you this offers you lots of wisdom and knowledges you in many ways because you see the world differently in their eyes. they may be a pisces?? or have pisces in their chart.

eight of wands: i’m seeing that your person is very extroverted and very social. i’m seeing that they have alot of friends and this is because they’re able to bond with a lot of people and this is how they keep friendships. they’re really good at carrying conversations and even starting them. they aren’t afraid to take the lead in things. you are often wowed by how well they’re able to connect with complete strangers, and this is just like mind blowing to you. i see you may be a bit of an ambivert (some of you) so this person takes the lead in some convos. sometimes you can’t even get a word in! lol

the star: your person is so so so confident and comfortable in their own skin. the card illustrates a cat knocking over a glass full of water, and this to me resembles how they just don’t let stuff get in their way. they don’t let the bad parts of the world negatively affect their way of living. they take this as a way of growth and they take this as a challenge. they love the feeling of adrenaline they get when they do something. but you will admire how this person carries themselves. because they have no care in the world. they put themselves first because they know that the world will never stop for them. this person is just wow their energy is so healing and so balanced. they’re literally the definition of the sun.

the tower: this is just continuing from what i was saying previously. change is possible. to you, you need to follow a routine and if something changes it may feel like the end of the world to you. but to them. they love change. they admire change. change is what keeps them going. they like to live on the wild side a bit, they like to step out of their comfort zone, they’re the type to say yolo (😭) they aren’t afraid to be a little dangerous because they find routines and schedules to be boring. they honestly might have gotten into trouble at school sometimes??? just got that little message there haha

their fav things abt you:

(i wasn’t going to do it but y’all got an extra card lol)

four of cups: your person honestly loves that you have a routine and a schedule you follow. to them it makes you seem very intelligent and mature. they also like the differing aspects of you hating change and them loving it because… they want to spice up your life a bit. you might be very bored in life when you meet this person that you step out of your own comfort zone and let them lead the way. they want to show you the world in a totally different perspective.

six of swords: you’re somebody who isn’t afraid to show your sensitive side and be emotional. since you are very comfortable with yourself and aren’t afraid to open up. this person isn’t so comfortable with showing their vulnerable side because they like to put up a front at times, but you don’t. you don’t people judge you for how you’re feeling because they’re feelings. they really like when they see all these sides of you because it reminds them of how human you are.

ten of pentacles: like i said previously some of you may be very wealthy and some of this could be inherited from your family. and if you aren’t wealthy i am seeing for a lot of you, you’re good with saving money and spending money correctly. im seeing that your fs really loves how well you take care of your money and don’t spend it all in one go (unlike them…😬) i’m seeing that you’re also very humble and not cocky at all. especially with how some of you may be very wealthy or just because you can take care of your money well, they like how you don’t shove it down people’s throats. you’re a very humble person.

ace of wands: i’m seeing you coming home to your spouse and just telling them about your day and all of these ideas and opportunities you were given and you telling them your input that you thought about and at the end of it they’re just jaw dropped. like you’re so intelligent in their eyes because you see the world in such a unique way. they would have never thought of it like that, iykwim.

knight of cups: you’re literally their ideal type. you’re everything they’ve ever wished for and more. i’m seeing that when you come into their life they’re just astounded on how somebody like you actually exists. like in their mind they manifested you cause there’s no way lol. i’m seeing that you’re just somebody they’ve always wanted and so some of you they may be lowkey obsessed cause they don’t want to lose you, but others of you they’re just so madly in love haha

the chariot: i’m seeing that you’re somebody who likes to move fast. you don’t stop for anybody, and this is one of the many things that you and your spouse relate to is you both just keep on moving. this is often because of your routine that life just begins to be one endless cycle so obviously the world moves a lot quicker, but either way you don’t slow down you like that when an idea or opportunity happens you take it.

their personality:

the lovers - queen of swords - king of cups - eight of swords - five of pentacles - four of cups - page of wands

they are big on standing up for themselves and others. they are the type of person who isn’t afraid to say anything, which is why they tend to get into a lot of conflict. i’m seeing that this person tends to be loud and isn’t the type to secretly talk crap abt somebody behind their back. they say it to their face. your spouse is confrontational fs. but they do this for the ones they love. it isn’t attention seeking or trying to be center of attention, it’s them protecting their loved ones from any evil energy’s. they hear one bad thing about you and they’re either trying to find out every little detail abt this person to ruin their life or they’re face to face abt to fight. they’re not intimidating but you really don’t want to get on their bad side lol. they also can have such a soft side to them. besides the extroverted behavior they are capable of relaxing and really listening into others feelings and energy. it might come as a surprise but they have a lot of wisdom of their own to share. they again aren’t big on opening up and tend to hide their feelings from you and others, they hate being perceived as weak. they are very adventurous and very impulsive at times, but they know how to have fun.

how they will make you feel:

knight of pentacles - the hierophant - ten of swords - four of pentacles - the hanged man

i see that you may often be discredited for your work and can feel very unheard and unseen by people around you. i see that your ideas are often extremely important and extremely helpful to your community but it’s seen by jealous eyes. this is why your work is pushed down. your spouse is so supportive in everything you do. i see that they will listen to every.single.idea. you have. i see that they will make you feel very heard and seen, and at some point their opinion is the only one you care about. they will make you feel secure and understood, i’m seeing that they are one to validate your feelings. they don’t ever want to make you feel invalidated and often try to understand every side to an argument. i’m seeing that they are somebody who will definitely make you surrender these dark thoughts and trade them into more hopeful feelings. i’m seeing that they might even offer you shadow work ideas… they will bring you lots of faith and i see this will benefit you greatly.

their looks:

the hermit - the fool - death - five of swords - queen of pentacles - nine of swords

so i’m seeing dark skin and hair. somebody who may have hair that is pretty short. so maybe girls are short guys are a bit long but both prefer their hair shorter. some of you they may like to dye it a dark color. mostly seeing dark brown. i’m seeing they have a very innocent look to them, they look very youthful? they may be younger than you or they just take really good care of their skin and their body. again i was seeing they like to work out and may have some muscles to them. sleeper build?? i don’t see their style being very edgy, unlike pile 1 they’re very into brighter colors. and even then they might like very toned colors. especially colors that compliment their skin and hair. i’m seeing that they may have a bit of an rbf. suuupperrr strong aura people are attracted to this person because of their aura. i’m seeing that they may also look confused all the time (???) like the lights are on but nobody’s home haha. i’m also seeing that they could have a large nose or their nose is very prominent? nice smile. good cheekbones too. i’m seeing that they could be fairly feminine or they are more comfortable in their feminine side. i’m seeing that they’re short asf tho definitely shorter than you. actually some of you might be the same height…. they will never be taller than you that’s for sure. so either same height - shorter. their neck???? something abt their neck you really like i- idk. some of you really like their legs too, they don’t skip leg day. could have a noticeable scar somewhere??? on the face or arms… they look so innocent and cute to people but then they open their mouth and people are wishing they never thought that lol you love your fs though this doesn’t bother you ahsha could also be younger than you. pouty lips too? their chin might be a bit prominent aswell. slim face.

their love language:

the tower - four of wands - queen of cups - 2 of wands - ten of swords

physical touch 110% this person love love loves touching you. hugging you, kissing you, etc they have to have their hands on you 24/7. they try not to be annoying but they can’t help it they’re so down bad for you. i’m ngl i’m seeing ‘that one couple in line at the fair’ iykyk … they love physical touch im seeing them wrapping their arms around you when you’re doing something. some of you they hold onto your waist when out in public, they let people know you’re taken that’s for sure. words of affirmation. this is especially seen when they notice you’re stressed or something is bothering you, they shower you with affirmations to make you feel better. they try to cheer you up by making you laugh… some of you this will not work but i’m seeing that they try anyways haha. theyre very into flirting with you too, i see any chance they get they flirt with you. they like to make you flustered in public. i’m seeing they whisper things into your ear when you’re out and it catches you off guard, they like to see you looking red in the face or shocked because it makes them want to do it more lol.

how they will comfort you:

five of wands - 2 of cups - queen of pentacles - six of cups

again with the words of affirmation, i’m seeing that you can overthink really badly over things and can feel very overwhelmed and your fs will do everything in their power to cheer you up. they love to tell you everything they love about you, everything they cherish about you etc. i’m seeing that literally NEVER want to see you get hurt. in their eyes you’re the most precious thing to them, and if anything were to happen to you they will feel like it’s the end of the world. like you stub your toe or something and suddenly they’re carrying you to bed, making your favorite dinner, etc. like they’re so down bad this is sickening. lol. i’m also seeing that they are very blunt to you about things, they let you know if you’re in the wrong abt something, they might be a tough love type of person. they want to make you feel secure and keep that positive mindset but they also don’t want you to get too in your head about things. i’m seeing that you will feel so much better after you rant to them about something because they’re just so good at correlating their words.

First times:

First Meet: Ace of swords - the high priestess

so i feel like most of pile 2 might meet their fs online. on a dating app or some type of social media. it could be you who finds them first, or them who finds you first idk. but i am seeing that you guys will immediately hit it off. like the energy is very calm and relaxed. this brings me back to saying y’all have shared interests because you definitely do. and you two will probably bond really quickly like “oh you look this too? let’s meet up rn” like LMAO y’all are just both certain this is the right person for you. i see you both will be laughing a lot when you meet and alot of smiles. you might find your fs to be really funny?? like they’re probably a naturally funny person and it’s a plus to you. like green flag for sure.

First Date: judgement - ace of cups

so for your first date i’m seeing somewhere outdoors OR an arcade or somewhere where you can do lots of things. i’m seeing that the energy here is very vibrant and fun. you both will be smiling alot and having a great time and it’s just an overall fun experience. i do see there being major tension between the two of you and i think it’s because you two just know you’re meant for each other. like i wouldn’t be surprised if y’all started dating after your first date because the love is just there. y’all will find out so much about each other because you guys just feel so comfortable in each others energy.

First Kiss: The magician - the emperor

so definitely seeing you initiating the kiss. the emperor card literally screams “do it” like i see you hesitating to kiss them but spirit will be screaming in your ear “do it do it do it” like chanting LMAO. i see that you might catch them off guard when you kiss them, you might have your hand on their cheek/jaw. or they will. i’m seeing that they could have been talking about something or busy and then boom you give them a big ol smooch. i see the energy and feelings are mutual and they will kiss back cause in their heads they’re saying “hell yea” LMAO. like they’ve been waiting ages for you to kiss them, they def weren’t going to make the first move lolz.

their shadow side:

temperance - king of cups - six of cups - the lovers - five of cups - queen of pentacles

i’m seeing your future spouse can honestly be extremely childish and immature. i keep hearing the word ‘mean’. they can say things that make you go “why did you just say that?” cause it could have been disrespectful or just something incredibly hurtful. i’m seeing that they are mostly this way towards themselves tho. you will often see them being extremely ill towards themselves and saying mean things about themselves and you’re like “why are you saying this about yourself?” because on the outside they like to be seen as happy and perfect but behind closed doors they can be insecure. pile 2 some of you do want to have a family and kids, but your fs may have a hard time coming to terms with this. i think they may have some generational trauma and so they’ve grown into this person now and they may be exactly like the person who gave them this trauma. iykwim. they either 1) don’t want to be a parent just because or 2) don’t want to be a parent because they know they’ll be just like the person who raised them. not all of you but some of y’all’s fs may say things in spite of the moment. during arguments they can be extremely childish and immature and say things to hurt your feelings. (this is a really unhealthy thing in a relationship so definitely if this is happening talk to them about it. y’all don’t deserve that type of energy from anyone.)

Extra Messages !!:

The Oldest Fairy: so i’m seeing that you might be afraid of losing this youthful side to you, and you may be afraid of getting older. im seeing that spirit wants you to know that you shouldn’t be afraid of getting older and maturing, your fs will be put into your life so that you don’t lose this childish side to you. they will show you parts of you that you’ve never seen before. don’t be afraid of getting older.

Love: y’all are literally the cutest. i’ve been cheesing this entire reading because you two are inseparable. y’all are meant to be. y’all are perfect for each other. this love is once in a lifetime. this love is infinite. even after death your love for one another will stay known. you guys may have had a past life together because you two are so familiar and so in tune with each others energy it’s insane. you might not have been in many or any relationships pile 2 so this relationship is very new it feels very new and very raw and it will show you the world in such a magical way. y’all are precious stop.

Let Go of Control Issues: allow this situation to unfold naturally. i didn’t put this in the shadow side but they might have some control issues. but you also. i’m getting that you’re really urging and pulling this relationship to happen NOW but spirit says it needs to wait. don’t rush things pile 2 the universe knows that when you receive this love you won’t be disappointed.

what chakra is their weakest: heart chakra

what chakra is their strongest: crown chakra

your song: nervous - Shawn Mendes

extra key: water sign, rose, rose quartz, opal, aventurine, clear quartz, 222, blonde, brunette, dyed hair, air sign, earth sign, few years 1-5, green eyes, twin flame, lives close to that area, from that area, 666, 555, 1212, 3333, 9999, 5555, street style, no, gemini, scorpio

PILE 3

your energy check in:

these are clarifying cards for you and your currently energy, this helps me connect to you further and also makes sure this reading is right for you! <3

eight of wands - mother of swords - the sun - eight of swords

you seem to be a very optimistic pile 3. i’m seeing that you went through intense struggles in your life, you went through soooo much in the past and you’re finally transitioning into this happier and more sustainable way of living. i’m seeing a lot of you are divinely protected. whether you realize it or not you are protected. and not just from the divine but people around you, you have a whole army behind you pile 3. i’m not saying it’s impossible for bad things to happen to you, but it will take a lot of work because the universe is not letting this energy come back into your life. pile 3 you feel so comfortable in your skin. you feel so balanced and you feel finally understood and finally seen. you don’t feel broken, and forgotten about, and misunderstood. people are finally seeing you for who you truly are. you are able to get up in the mornings and actually live life. i do see you still struggle with having to live with the memories of what happened to you in the past. it seems that though you’ve healed or are currently healing you still live with this haunting memory or you just find yourself reliving those moments again. remember that spirit is always with you and you will always have somebody there. you aren’t alone 🤍

oracle: reflections

pile 3 shadow work is so beneficial for you. in this time you are feeling stuck, confused, lost, drained at moments. and this is because there is something within yourself that you need to change. change is your best option. don’t be scared to let go of things that no longer serve you. they’re in the past. they hold you no greater good. they formed you into the person you are today, but that doesn’t mean it needs to stay in your life. sticking with the original plans is a good idea, but don’t be afraid to switch things up. you control this part of your life now, nobody else. let this ego go.

extra messages: dark hair, eyeliner, pigtails, full lips, leo, trauma, mama, gothic, curvy, earth sign, fire sign

their energy:

daughter of pentacles - father of cups - three of pentacles - the devil

okay like. let me go on a rant really quickly. pile 3 y’all are one tough bunch. y’all have been through SHIT. and guess what? so has your future spouse. pile 2 i was talking about how they will bond over personal interests like music, hobbies, etc. pile 3 y’all are sooooo different. i see that it’s one of those things where nobody else understood you except each other. you have grown through hell and back, and so has your future spouse. you will find yourself so amazed that somebody like this has gone through so much, and they’d think the same thing. y’all might meet through group therapy tbh but that might be stretching it. anywho your person is definitely an empath. they feel everyone’s emotions x10. they can read people sooooo well?? they can read people like an open book. i’m seeing they might be very masculine and you might be very feminine. they’re very sensitive and can take things personally lol. bad coping mechanism ngl. i see that they can have a very toxic mindset towards things and be seen as pessimistic, this can be a turn off to you when you meet them. i think you can understand why they feel this way once you get to know them better.

oracle: fairies

i’m seeing your future spouse can have a very unique look to them. their style may be odd to strangers, something about the way they present themselves could be perceived as weird or ‘different’ to people. i’m seeing to you this person is very different from your past. they aren’t so much your type, but i do see that you connect with them in some way. i see maybe their personality is what makes them more attractive to you andddd they are so sweet?? like they’re absolutely precious lolz they could be a hippie tbh… or something similar to it.

extra message: long blonde hair, no sleep, pale skin, water sign, pisces, cancer, capricorn, scorpio, 1212

your fav things about them:

five of cups: this card is normally a very sad card but the energy im getting is that you love how far theyve come. you love that they never gave up and theyre here with you now. i’m seeing that they open up to you about alot of things they struggle with and they tell you when theyre not feeling their best and you appreciate that. you look up to them pile 3.

the hanged man: you like how they like to view every perspective of a situation. i see that theyre somebody who puts time and effort into things, and when things don’t work out people can’t tell them “they didn’t try”. your future spouse loves to put in effort into things and relationships.

four of pentacles: you enjoy how theyre they are. it gives you some hope for the world. you’re really good at working with others, and can be somewhat of a people person. (might even say post people pleaser??) they might be big multitasker, and this is like somewhat amazing to them cause youre like “whatttt…???”

two of cups: they treat you so well. they make you feel so loved and appreciated. you’ve never felt this way about anyone before. they show you what true love actually is. you may have been betrayed in the past by someone who you thought you could trust (who you might have been dating). i see you are very protective of your energy and when they come into your life they show you that the love you had before wasn’t real. you feel very safe with them.

six of pentacles: they like to spoil you tbh. i don’t see them being somebody with alot of money, but they do try to gift you things. i just saw somebody plucking a flower and gifting it to their spouse. them with you tbh. you love how well they treat you (like i said before) they just want to give you the world is all i’m seeing because they hate hate hate seeing you down. they’re soooo protective of you.

their fav things about you:

king of cups: when you meet them you will be very grounded and this will stay. you may already be very grounded but i’m just seeing like… you have so much balance in your life once you meet this person. this person honeslty is the cherry on top. they will love how you’re able to include them into your life, but also be very independent. i see they may struggle with being a tad bit dependent at times, and so they view you as sort of their grounding.

nine of swords: pile 3 do you like to journal or write?? i see some of you that could be a hobby of yours. your future spouse adores this. they will never overstep your boundaries, but if you ever wanted to share a little bit of your knowledge/hobby with them they are zoned in. they LOVE hearing about your special interests.

the world: pile 3 arent y’all some dreamers. i swear y’all live in the clouds. you also are a very grateful in a lot of things. you may have close relationships with family and they enjoy it. they love seeing this nurturing side of you. they love seeing how careful and gentle you can be.

son of pentacles: you’re very wise in the sense of finances and business? some of you might be really good in your work or you are just extremely wise in the way you handle situations. i see you guys can receive lots of luck. you may be very lucky. you future spouse actually really likes this lol. they like how lucky you are cause they believe that you deserve it.

son of swords: pile 3 yall might be a little intimidating…. but your future spouse??? tbh. it turns them on a little bit. like. they love seeing this scary side to you??? they love when you get defensive and protective. they might be very deer in headlights and you're very saber tooth tiger (literally just a random animal i thought of ngl??) they like feeling protected and safe with you, and likes seeing that darker side you have.

their personality:

the sun - six of pentacles - daughter of wands - three of swords - the tower - the lovers

okay so first off i heard they might be a bit of a hoarder… that goes for some. anywho. this person is such a damaged energy. they’ve gone through so much shit in their life. the three of swords makes me think that they were betrayed by close friends?? and this is because your person really loves helping people. they love being there for people. they might do charity work? or they do some type of fundraiser? it brings them bliss, joy, it warms their heart to see people getting the help they need. goodness pile 3 your future spouse is suuuppppeeerrrr sensitive. i literally just seen them in the verge of tears 24/7. like you’re somebody who’s really tough and might hide your emotions well… yea not ur spouse. they are so close to breaking down lolz. they love hugs by the way. i’m seeing they just have so much love to give? they are the type of person to put others happiness before their own, which is probably why they were betrayed in the past. they are def a people pleaser at times, this is something they need to work on. they really just want to be there for everybody, and is just an extreme empath with a lot of big kid emotions. i don’t see you finding this annoying, but i do see them crying over cute animal vids and you’re just looking at them confused haha

how they will make you feel:

the magician - death - the empress - two of pentacles - three of wands - seven of cups

pile 3 let me just say i love y’all’s connection. everything about this relationship has my heart melting. i didn’t do this for the other two piles but i felt the urge to read bottom of the deck energy and when i flipped it over boom the wheel of fortune. pile 3 your connection will feel too good to be true. you’ll feel like you’re in a dream. some of you might lucid dream a lot im seeing. this connection will feel so unreal, so close, so intimate. when i saw the magician card i thought “oh they balance each others energy” book the two of pentacles came out. sooo many clarifications from spirit. when i saw the death card i heard your future spouse literally saying “change is good for you”. you guys are tied together. i was getting twin flame energy but tbh i feel like y’all are lowkey soulmates. y’all are meant to be together in this time and many times after that. you two only understand each other. i see that you guys are so raw and authentic and real. pile 2 their fs keeps secrets from them, not you pile 3. you and your fs lets you see every single side of themselves. y’all aren’t afraid to be human. this connection has lasted lifetimes, you don’t care how angry or how dramatic the other person can be because this love you two have is strong. yk how some people it’s an ick when somebody acts a certain way??? yea you guys literally don’t care. you will love each other just as much as you did yesterday and more. you make each other feel so complete. you make each other feel so balanced. you open up to each other and break down these walls y’all built up all those years ago. you are so real with this person and it makes you feel so emotional because you know that only they could understand you. i love this pile so much stop

their looks:

three of swords - temperance - eight of pentacles - six of swords - ace of wands - the magician

so i’m seeing if they have light skin or pale skin their hair is darker, and if they have darker skin their hair is lighter?? and not even just white or blonde hair like they probably dye it a brighter color. im seeing they have pin straight hair or really loose curls. some have wavy hair but it’s mostly straight hair vibes tbh. i’m seeing that in the winter they may wear brighter colors, but in the fall,spring, and summer they wear darker colors lol??? okay so listen to me on this, but im seeing that they look lowkey dead. like pile 1 i was talking abt how their eyes look like dead/sleepy your person lowkey looks like a zombie. (and no nothing bad to why they look like this, some of them just look like that) but this isnt saying they don’t take care of themselves. they do take care of themselves 100%. im seeing that their nose might be fairly big? their lips might be very small too. some of them have piercing blue eyes. like bright blue. others have honey or hazel. nothing too dark i’m seeing. could be super super skinny. long fingers?? they’re tall too? might be taller than you. people aren’t intimidated by this person at all, i see people think they look very innocent and nice. like they just have this very sweet look to them tbh. i see people can tell this person has gone through stuff too, i see they might be a bit of a target at times and other times people are really careful with them. i see this is definitely odd one out energy, people perceive this person as different.

their love language:

the sun - nine of cups - the moon - father of swords - daughter of cups

acts of service for sure they want to GIVE TO YOUUU. they want to help you out in any way they can. literally will give you foot rubs(??) i’m seeing they will cook for you. so gift giving by be one too. i’m seeing they just want to help you out in any way. definitely loves quality time as well. this is somebody who will find comfort in just complete silence with you. they will hold you while they watch tv or read, and while you’re doing something else. they just want to be in your presence. i see them being a really good listener to your rants too. but it’s balanced cause you listen to them really well too. y’all are so comfortable with each other this is adorable. they also know all of your favorite things??? you might idk like to crochet and this person will find something for you to crochet, or they will buy you a crochet pin or like a magnet that says something abt crochet on it idk LMAO they want to let you know that they do actually care what you have to say to them. they are really good at showing it haha

how they will comfort you:

three of pentacles - six of swords - nine of pentacles - the magician

they want to try and take you out if you’re not feeling good mentally. you may want to stay inside and not do anything and your fs is like “uh no? you’re going to get your butt up and we’re gonna cheer you up” they know keeping you cooped up won’t make you feel better. if you’re sick this person will treat you like a god/goddess. they will make sure you are being fed well, you’re getting the right medicine at the right time, etc. when you’re sick it’s like terrible to them. some of them might be a germaphobe tbh. i’m seeing that they do like to take care of you. you feel like you’re burdening them but remember they love to help people. when you’re feeling under the weather or not good mentally they’re here for you 110%. they also might try and spoil you a little bit to make you feel better. they will literally do whatever you want haha

First Times:

First Meet: four of swords - mother of cups

i saw a museum? somewhere very calm and relaxed and where your emotions can run freely. somewhere where art can be or is expressed. could meet in a garden? or somewhere extremely colorful there is a lot of color. im seeing that you two will be very drawn towards each other but you both will be too nervous to come up and say anything lol. i am seeing you may be introduced to each other by a friend? that might be how you kick off the convo and then boom y’all are obsessed with each other. i think your spouse might offer a date idea near the end of the convo… 👀

First Date: two of wands - the moon

ok ok so im gonna take the moon card literally and say that y’all might stargaze on your first date. but this would be after the actual start of the date. y’all will definitely go somewhere outdoors. y’all might meet around the summer time. a lot of fairs happen in the summer time and im just seeing that happening ngl. y’all will go somewhere where a lot of people are present, but it feels like it’s just the two of you. this date will be soooo nerve wracking to both of you. so many awkward giggles and awkward movements. this is like teenage love, like holding their hand for the first time. you’ll feel very young with this person. i do see y’all not wanting this date to end so you go stargazing… some of you not all. but you both really just want to stay in each others energy for ever.

First Kiss: the chariot - mother of swords

okay i’m not going to lie, i wasn’t going to say it but i felt like you were going to have your first kiss on your first day and these cards kind of clarified that. i do feel like this relationship might move a bit fast for you pile 3 but there is so much passion between you two. like i am seeing you two lowkey having your first kiss really quickly if not on your first date. i’m seeing this doesn’t scare either of you because you both have so much love for each other. it’s honestly extremely intimate, i’m seeing that this kiss will last a long time and you both won’t really stop kissing hahah. i’m not seeing you two getting into a relationship immediately though… some of you yes others of you it will take just some time. but i do see this first kiss happening fairly quickly and neither of you are disappointed. tension tension tension.

their shadow side:

four of swords - ten of wands - son of wands - the star - the magician - eight of swords - daughter of pentacles - the empress

okay so this is somebody who can be very conflicting?? they might confuse you sometimes on how they’re feeling and this can annoy you. this person has alot of blockage in their life. they are stuck right now and will continue to be, in seeing that they have a lot of people against them? they might be somebody who uses their emotions as an excuse sometimes. and this can be really hurtful cause it can be seen as very manipulative. they are somebody who is extremely emotional and extremely in tune with you and nature but they just have this really dark side to them. they are somebody who doesn’t really change alot about themselves. it’s ironic cause they tell you that change is a good thing and that change can help you, but they refuse to change themselves.

Extra Messages!!:

Book Fairy: don’t be afraid to go out and try something new don’t be afraid to try new things and do something different in your life. something that challenges your intellect and makes you really think. change change change. you and your fs will explore these types of changes together. they’re i’ll definitely be the type to show you the world in many different ways.

Joy: you’re able to view the world in a positive way. you are able to go out and have fun. don’t let people places or things stop you from living life. the only person that should matter to you is you. be open to receiving joy and happiness in your life.

Worth Waiting For: divine timing is at work in your love life. this relationship is something that will change your life for only good reasons. i am seeing that this will bring you lots of abundance and clarity and you will feel at home with this person. there is no i’ll energy towards this connection, you two are meant for each other.

what chakra is their weakest: root chakra

what chakra is their strongest: heart chakra

your song: I Hear a Symphony - Cody Fry

Extra Key: 333,444, air/earth/water, marigold, carnelian, dioptase, sunstone, red jasper, aventurine, white, green eyes, grey hair, from that area, 444, 5555, 777, 2222, casual style, street style, NO, fire sign, gemini, in a while 5+

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charliedawn · 3 months ago

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Hi Charlie! Kindly coming into your ask box- First of all how are you? I adore your stories, I read them whenever I'm feeling down and it's perfect whenever I want to forget about my real life problems haha.

I was wondering how would the slashers react to a Hungarian y/n? Obviously I never found anyone writing about this scenario, for we 'hungries' are few. I'm actually Székely (Hungarians who speak the older version of the language and live in a different region than actual Hungarians), which means I'm Transylvanian. Like how would they react finding out that reader can literally move around with a bottle of alcohol on their head without it sliding off? Having long hair that is traditionally braided in two, and red ribbons braided in it (this is female case, which means the girl is 'on the market'), being able to speak multiple languages, meeting bears every single month given living in forest mountains, and owning traditional clothes that in old times mean high status? I'm sorry that this sounds so personal but like all my life (ever since I found out about slashers) I wanted to know how one might react to this kind of situation, given most fandoms, OBVIOUSLY include English reader. You can ignore if you want and sorry if u don't understand what I wrote :')

If you don't want to write for this (like I feel like I'm being too specific and personal with things) then I guess how they would react to reader with an interesting accent- all my English friends told me they love how I speak it's funny for them. Sending hugs and kisses I adore ur work <3

No need to apologize ! My pleasure. This is a really unique and interesting request, and I had fun searching what a Székely reader would be like. I hope I did it right. 😆

Slashers React to a Székely Reader

Jason Voorhees

Jason, being deeply connected to his own forested home, would be fascinated by your experiences with bears. He’s used to dealing with intruders, but meeting a bear every month ? That’s next-level survival. He’d probably view you as someone incredibly strong and capable, which earns you a lot of respect in his eyes. Your ability to balance a bottle on your head would both impress and confuse him—he’d tilt his head like how ? He is a clumsy man and if he tried the same, no bottle would survive. If you let him touch your traditional clothes, he’d be extra careful, appreciating the craftsmanship and the colors.

Michael Myers

Michael doesn’t react outwardly, but he watches. A lot. He’d probably test your balancing skills by suddenly throwing something your way while you’re carrying the bottle. If you catch it without dropping the bottle, you’d get a slow approving nod. He might also silently grab a red ribbon from your hair, just to see how you react—if you snatch it back, he’ll keep doing it just to mess with you. But, he would also appreciate the traditions and understand your connection to nature—since nature is fairly important to him as well. If you could, he would ask you to learn the language. True, he would not be able to speak it—but just hearing it would make him happy. He would also ask you to teach him your traditional dishes.

Brahms Heelshire

Brahms would fixate on your braids and ribbons. He’d like the idea of your clothes being a ‘status’ marker since Brahms is from a higher-class family himself. But the ribbons…he would like them, but might get possessive, asking you to remove the ribbons or change their color so others don’t think you’re ‘on the market.’ Because you are not. You are HIS friend. No sharing or letting someone take you away from him. He’d also adore your ability to speak multiple languages, insisting you talk to him in Hungarian just so he can hear how it sounds. Your traditional clothes ? He’d want you to wear them all the time in the manor, seeing them as regal and elegant.

Bo & Vincent Sinclair

Bo would act like he’s unimpressed but would secretly be very intrigued. He’d tease you about the bottle-balancing trick—"Alright, but can ya do that while runnin’ ?"—but would absolutely brag about it to tourists before luring them into his trap. He would show them your trick and kill them while they are dumbstruck. Or he would ask you to bring his beers like that—and exclusively like that. And when he first saw you in your traditional clothes ? He was mesmerised. You looked like a damn princess. When you told him what the braids and ribbons meant though…Bo suddenly grabbed your braids and quickly pulled your braids loose…On the market ? Like hell you are…

Vincent, on the other hand, would love your traditional clothes. He’d want to sketch you in them, fascinated by the detail and historical meaning behind them. He would love to take pictures of you too. He would ask you about your culture and be really interested. He would also be impressed by the bottle trick and would immediately inform Bo because Bo would be impressed too for sure.

Norman Bates

Norman would see you as someone from another world—elegant, mysterious, and old-fashioned in the best way. He’d be captivated by your hair and the meaning behind the ribbons, maybe a little too curious about your availability status. If you ever wear your traditional clothes, he’d compare you to an old painting, romanticizing it. Your survival stories about the mountains and bears would leave him both impressed and slightly intimidated.

Norman *comes up behind you and slowly wraps his arms around you from behind* : "…Te vagy gyönyörű, drágám."

He would learn the recipes for Székely Gulyás (Székely stew), Puliszka (A cornmeal dish similar to polenta, eaten with cheese, milk, or stew) and Töltött Káposzta (Stuffed cabbage, a staple at Székely celebrations) to surprise you.

Freddy Krueger

Freddy would not take you seriously at first—until he sees the bottle trick. Then, suddenly, he’s got a new game to play. He’d try to mess with you by making dream versions of your traditional clothes wrong just to see if you notice the inaccuracies. He’d also probably joke about the bears—"So, what, you got one as a pet ?" If you start speaking Hungarian with him, though ? He’d hate it—he loves running his mouth, and now he doesn’t know what you’re saying. He would have to get a dictionary. He doesn’t like reading.

Pennywise & Penny

Pennywise would see you as someone tied to old traditions, which he respects in a strange way. He’d enjoy the idea of you carrying history with you. Penny, on the other hand, would love that you meet bears regularly—he’d probably insist that the next time you see one, you have to bring him along. The bottle-balancing trick ? Oh, now it’s a game. He’d try to distract you just to see if you mess up.

Penny would definitely imitate you and laugh as he starts dancing with three bottles on his head.

Jack Torrance

Jack would instantly bond with you over alcohol—if you can balance a bottle on your head, you must know good drinks, right ? He’d want to drink with you, hear your stories, and maybe even try balancing a bottle himself (bad idea). Your language skills would impress him, but he’d be especially curious about your encounters with bears—probably comparing it to his experiences in the snowy Overlook. He would also use you as an inspiration for his work and ask you questions about your traditions. He would also be interested in learning your language.

Ghostface! Eddie Munson

Eddie would be so hyped about your skills. "Dude, that’s metal as hell ! You walk around with a bottle on your head and survive bear encounters ? Like…what ?" He’d immediately ask you to teach him your language, failing horribly but loving every second. Your traditional clothes would remind him of a fantasy character, and he’d start calling you things like “the warrior queen of Transylvania.” He’d also be obsessed with the fact that you speak multiple languages—every time you switch to Hungarian, he’d dramatically pretend to swoon.

You: "A mosolyod beragyogja a napomat."

Him *looking at you with a big smile* : "I didn’t understand a single word that just came out of your mouth, but I love it."

#fandoms #imagine #fanfic #slashers #pennywise 1990 #pennywise 2017 #pennywise x reader #michael myers x reader #freddy krueger x reader #jason voorhees x reader #brahms heelshire x reader #bo sinclair x reader #vincent sinclair x reader #eddie munson #ghostface x reader #ghostface eddie munson #norman bates x reader

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andypantsx3 · 11 months ago

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andie's wips for gaza — ˖˚˳⊹

hi all! i'm not sure if this is something anyone would be interested in but i'm giving it a shot. i have a little capacity to contribute to fics for gaza's option to sponsor a wip. below are a couple of my wips i think i can realistically deliver all or most of before end of year, divided into current wips + a few smutty one shots i hope you might be interested in. if any more of my time clears up i can add more & let y'all know!!

i'm setting the threshold at the standard rate of $1 donation per 100 words, any extra would be sooo incredibly appreciated but obviously not at all required! notes on how this will all work below my wips.

update 5/29 — ˖˚˳⊹

All of my WIPs have been fully funded! I am so deeply grateful to everyone who donated and/or helped spread the word. I promise to work hard and write fics that live up to just how much this means to me. If you still have capacity to donate, I encourage you to check out the other authors participating and help fund their WIPs too. Thank you so much; your generosity means the entire world to me.

current wips — ˖˚˳⊹

something in the water : todoroki shouto x reader

As a future marine biologist, you’ve scored big on your final internship: a summer in the tropics, researching the waters off the coast of a lush, sunny island. But what you thought would be all beach days and piña coladas turns out to be the revelation of a lifetime when you haul in a handsome merprince, and discover not everything in these waters is quite as it seems. — estimated remaining wc: 3 chapters @ 3k each (9,000 total words) — donated wc: 9,000/9,000 words fully sponsored! — progress tracker: 3,800/9,000 words

ready or knot : todoroki shouto x reader

Todoroki Shouto is so unsettlingly beautiful, you’re certain he has to be an omega. That is, until a chance encounter with a pushy alpha reveals you were incredibly mistaken—and the surprises don’t stop there. Shouto's suddenly mystifying behavior adds another layer of complexity to an already confusing inter-agency investigation. It would be so much easier to figure things out—and suppress your growing feelings—if only Shouto would stop being so strangely attentive to you... — estimated remaining wc: 5 chapters @ 2.5k each (12,500 words) — donated wc: 12,600/12,500 words fully sponsored! — progress tracker: 200/12,500 words

new wips (smutty one shots) — ˖˚˳⊹

by the book : midoriya izuku x reader

When your pro hero boyfriend comes home to find you studying, he suddenly takes a great interest in helping out. You find his methods... questionable. contents: nsft, hysterical literature (reading out loud while sexually stimulated), pro hero deku, slight intelligence kink, gn + afab reader, cunnilingus, established relationship, fluff — estimated wc: 2,500 words — donated wc: 2,500/2,500 words fully sponsored! — progress tracker: 3,000/2,500 words completed!

loads of fun : todoroki shouto x reader

After moving into your first apartment together, Shouto seems more amorous than ever. You're not sure why—but when he catches you doing a load of laundry, more than your clothes are about to get tumbled. contents: nsft, pro hero au, domesticity kink, gn + afab reader established relationship, fluff, emotional sex — estimated wc: 2,500 words — donated wc: 2,500/2,500 words fully sponsored! — progress tracker: 2,800/2,500 words completed!

filling in : bakugou katsuki x reader

A production assistant for an erotic arts studio, you think you've seen every ridiculous plot line under the sun. But not even porn tropes can compare to the absurd reality you find yourself in when the on-screen talent goes missing, and you're asked to fill in opposite the studio's number one star Bakugou Katsuki. contents: thee classic oh-no-the-porn-talent-has-gone-missing-let's-sub-a-rando-in trope, no quirks au, pornstar bakugou, soft dom bakugou, gn + afab reader, unrequited-requited crush — estimated wc: 3,000 words — donated wc: 3,000/3,000 words fully sponsored! — progress tracker: 8,200/3,000 words completed!

notes — ˖˚˳⊹

rate: $1 (USD) donation per 100 words, any extra would be sooo incredibly appreciated but obviously not at all required!

how it works (you): send me an ask with the wip you're donating towards and a screenshot of your donation to any fund from this list, a charity of your choice (please make sure it's verified), or my preferred one here! please do not send the same screenshot to multiple authors, and please make sure any personal information is scrubbed from your screenshot as i will be supplying @ficsforgaza with the proof of your donation!! i will aim to update the donated wc section of each wip in this post so there's not overlap in what people are donating for.

how it works (me): i will log my progress below each wip (the progress tracker section of each) & will commit to updating that count weekly. i will work in the rough order of donations received, by adding that number of words to each wip. this also means that for $5 i could add 500 words but not publish until the chapter or oneshot is completed, so please be aware of that!! my goal is to at least publish every single word people have donated for by end of year, but obviously things can happen & i will provide updates if anything gets in the way of that!

if you have any further questions please let me know!! i've never done something like this and it's very probable i've left something unclear lol.

lastly i'd like to thank you in advance for helping out if you can, but no worries if not! i also know times are tough and money is tight, and i'd encourage you to check out the other writers on @ficsforgaza's list of participants when published to see if you'd rather spend your money on one of their wips (or their custom requests!) before selecting mine!! the money goes towards a good cause either way.

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benispunk · 6 months ago

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Who's that girl?

Chapter 4: Before We Speak

Logan always has to be the strong figure, even when everything wants to fall apart.

logan howlett x reader

TW: language, D&W, mentions of dark backgrounds.

A/N: hello lovelies!! fourth chapter is up whoop whoop🎉. this one is entirely focused on Logan because why not? this is a day in our little honey badger's life and I'm not sorry for anything. it could have been way worse. thanks for all the support on this series!! enjoy this part <3

→ this fic is inspired by the TV Show New Girl, Wade and Logan aren't Deadpool and Wolverine (no powers/mutant gene etc) but I did take most of their character traits and storyline!!

Masterlist / Previous Part / Next Part

Beep Beep Beep Be—

Sometimes Logan wondered how he still hadn’t destroyed that damn alarm clock. He woke up slowly, his body heavy from the comfort of sleep. Finally glancing at his worst enemy of his every morning, he read: 5:30 AM. Time to start the day.

He got up and opened the blinds, though the sun wasn’t up yet, and except for some other people in other buildings, nobody was up yet either.

After a quick shower and pulling on some shirt and jeans, Logan grabbed his keys and backpack, trying not to make too much noise for his roommates that were probably still sleeping deeply.

You’ll sleep later, Logan.

As he stepped outside of the building, the cool morning air hit his face, waking him up fully.

Logan was the one in charge of opening the center and he preferred going there way earlier than everyone else just to get a moment of peace and calm before the chaos started. He checked every room and classes, making sure everything was ready for the day and once this was done, he sat down and served himself one well-deserved cup of (disgusting) coffee.

The center was a large, well-worn building. It wasn't much to look at from the outside—just a faded brick structure with narrow windows—but inside, it was full of life. Colorful posters lined the walls, some painted by the kids themselves, and inspirational quotes were scattered around, the kind that Logan never really cared for but knew meant something to someone.

The lounge area where he sat was small but cozy, with mismatched chairs and a sagging couch that had seen better days. A few shelves were filled with books and board games, and the corner had a coffee station that barely worked. Yet, this was his place— a refuge in the chaos.

Beyond the lounge, the rest of the center sprawled out: classrooms where kids of all ages learned in their own ways, sensory rooms with soft lights and calming music, a large gym where activities were held, and a garden out back where they often took the kids for fresh air. It was more than just a special school; it was a sanctuary for those who needed it.

As Logan scanned the room, his thoughts drifted. He wasn’t one to reflect much, but opening the center every day before anyone else arrived had become his ritual, a moment to prepare for the storm of the day ahead. Today would be like any other— he’d make sure the supplies were ready, the classrooms set, and his mind focused.

He was pulled out of his thoughts by the hum of the automatic doors opening.

“Good morning, Logan.”

Logan’s daydream was interrupted by the familiar voice of Charles. The older man entered the lounge in his wheelchair, his presence as steady as ever. Charles had been the head of the center for as long as Logan could remember.

Logan nodded, setting down his coffee. “Morning, Charles.”

Charles wheeled himself closer, pausing just in front of Logan. “Early, as always. You know, you don’t have to get here before the sun’s up every day.”

Logan grunted in response, though there was a faint smile pulling at the corner of his lips. “Old habits die hard.”

Charles chuckled. “Well, I appreciate it. Keeps the place running smoothly.” He paused, glancing around the lounge, his expression softening. “How’s everything looking for today?”

Logan leaned back, arms crossed over his chest. “Classes are prepped, gym’s ready. Couple new kids starting this week, so I’ll be keeping an eye on them. Should be a normal day.”

Charles nodded thoughtfully, though there was something in his eyes that made Logan pause. “What?” Logan asked.

“Just thinking,” Charles said, his voice dropping a bit. “It’s a shame, isn’t it? All this work, and now…” He trailed off, and Logan knew exactly what he meant. The center was struggling. Funding cuts, low enrollment— there had been rumors for months now that they might not last much longer. It wasn’t the first time Charles had hinted at it, but hearing it out loud still hit Logan in the gut every time.

“We’ll figure it out,” Logan said, though even he wasn’t sure how much he believed it.

Charles nodded again, but there was a heaviness to the gesture. “I hope you’re right, Logan. For their sake.” he said, gesturing vaguely towards the classrooms, where the kids would soon arrive, full of energy and life.

Logan didn’t respond. He wasn’t one for long conversations, especially not ones that reminded him of things he couldn’t fix. Instead, he stood up and grabbed his coffee, raising it towards Charles in a silent gesture. “I’ll be in the gym.”

Charles watched him go, his expression unreadable.

The gym was Logan’s favorite part of the center. High ceilings, wide-open spaces, and the kind of place where he could let the kids run wild. He liked the controlled chaos of it all—kids bouncing off the walls, their laughter echoing, and the satisfaction of seeing them engage in a world that often felt too overwhelming for them. Here, they were free. Here, they were just kids.

As he stepped inside, Logan could already hear the hum of the day beginning. Soon the first teachers would trickle in. He checked the schedule on the clipboard hanging by the door, making mental notes of the day’s activities. But even as he planned, his thoughts lingered on Charles' words.

What if the center shut down? What would happen to the kids? What would he do?

He shoved the thought away for now, focusing on the present. There were kids to be taken care of today, and that's what mattered.

A sharp sound of footsteps echoed through the hallway, pulling Logan's attention to the door. The first wave of staff was arriving.

The first few kids arrived not long after them. Logan could hear their familiar voices echoing down the hallway, some excited, some grumpy from early wake-ups, but all of them ready to start their day. As they trickled in, Logan stood by the entrance to greet them.

"Morning, Bobby," Logan said as a boy with dark, tousled hair bounded through the door, his backpack almost as big as he was.

"Morning, Mr. Howlett!" Bobby called back with a wide grin, not slowing down as he headed straight for the gym.

Next was Kitty, one of the quieter students, who gave him a shy wave as she walked in, hugging her notebook to her chest.

"Morning, Kitty," Logan said softly, offering her a small smile. She nodded without a word, as always, but Logan could see the relief in her eyes. She always felt safe here.

The rest of the group trickled in—about a dozen kids in all, each with their own unique personalities and quirks. Logan knew them well, better than most. He could read their moods just by the way they walked in, and today seemed to be a good day. No tantrums, no meltdowns. Yet.

Once everyone was inside, Logan led them to the first class of the day. History wasn’t always the easiest subject to teach, but Logan had a way of making it work. He kept things simple, focusing on the stories behind the facts— because that’s what kids understood best, the stories.

As they settled into their seats, Logan stood at the front of the small classroom, a whiteboard behind him and a map of the world pinned to the wall.

"Alright, who remembers what we talked about last week?" Logan asked, his deep voice quiet but commanding enough to capture the attention of the room.

A few hands shot up— Bobby’s was the first, as always.

Logan nodded to him. "Go ahead, Bobby."

"We talked about Ancient Egypt! You said they had these huge tombs for their kings and queens, and they put all their treasures inside."

"That’s right," Logan said, crossing his arms and leaning against his desk. "The pyramids. But they didn’t just put treasures inside. What else?"

Kitty, who was usually too shy to speak up, raised her hand cautiously. Logan gave her an encouraging nod.

"Um, they put their pets inside too?" she said softly.

"Exactly. Sometimes pets, sometimes even servants." Logan smiled at her, watching her shoulders relax slightly. "Why do you think they did that?"

Bobby’s hand shot up again, but Logan pointed to a girl in the back who rarely spoke— Laura. The girl was staring at the map, lost in thought, but when Logan called her name, she blinked and looked around.

"Uh… because they thought they’d need them in the afterlife?" Laura said hesitantly.

"Right again," Logan replied. "They believed the afterlife was just another version of this life, so they wanted to bring everything with them that they’d need. It’s like packing for a trip, but instead of clothes, you’re bringing your pets and gold." He gave a small smile, which earned a few giggles from the class.

Logan continued the lesson, writing down some words on the board and telling stories of ancient rulers and their grand tombs. He kept the pace slow, knowing some of the kids needed extra time to process, and he made sure to check in with everyone throughout the lesson, gauging their engagement.

As the lesson wrapped up, the bell rang for the morning break, and the kids shuffled out of the classroom, excited to stretch their legs. Logan watched them go, making a mental note of who seemed engaged and who might need extra help later.

He was about to head out for a quick break himself when he noticed someone lingering by the door— Laura, the girl from earlier. She stood there, clutching the straps of her backpack, staring at the floor.

She had joined the center about a year ago, a girl with sharp eyes and a sharper tongue, quick to push people away before they could get too close. Her file said she’d been in and out of foster homes, and she had a history of acting out, of disappearing for days at a time. But Logan saw through it. She wasn’t just acting out for the sake of rebellion. It was survival for her. Trust didn’t come easy.

Each of these kids had been through so much stuff, things they didn’t deserve, things they weren’t even supposed to know at their age, and yet here they were, because the regular system wouldn’t take the risk of taking them in. That’s why this center existed, to help those kids and teenagers society had already rejected.

They were only children. It broke his heart every single day.

Laura was always on edge, always watching. Logan noticed the way she sized people up, the way her eyes darted around the room like she was waiting for something bad to happen.

When she first started at the center, they had clashed. Logan’s patience and calm demeanor only seemed to irritate her more. She didn’t talk unless she had to, and even then, it was usually a one-word answer.

Today, Laura had been quiet. Too quiet.

Logan had learned to read her tells, and something was off.

As the bell rang for the break, she didn’t move. The other kids bolted out of the classroom like they always did, but Laura stayed behind, her eyes still fixed on the window, her jaw clenched.

Logan leaned against his desk, waiting until the room was empty before speaking. "You’re gonna miss your break if you sit there all day."

She didn’t respond. Typical Laura.

Logan watched her for a moment before crossing the room and sitting down in the chair next to her, his body turned toward her but giving her space.

"You alright, kid?" he asked, his voice low and calm, like he was talking to a wild animal he didn’t want to spook.

Laura’s gaze didn’t shift, but her grip on the edge of her chair tightened.

"I know you," she muttered after a long silence, her voice rough. "You’re just waiting for me to screw up again."

Logan sighed softly, shaking his head. "Not here to wait for you to screw up. I’m here to help you."

Laura scoffed. "Yeah, right."

Logan leaned forward, resting his elbows on his knees. "You think I’m doing this for fun? Waking up at 5:30 every morning to come here because I got nothing better to do?"

She finally turned her head to look at him, her eyes narrowing like she was trying to figure out his angle.

"You don’t get it," she said, her voice harsh. "You don’t know what it’s like."

Logan met her gaze, unflinching. "Maybe I don’t know your exact story, but I’ve seen enough, and I know enough to get the picture. And I know you’re not alone, even if it feels like it."

Her eyes flickered for a second, something passing over her face before the hardened mask came back. She looked away, her jaw tightening again, and for a moment, Logan thought the conversation was over. But then she spoke again, quieter this time.

"I don’t wanna be here anymore," she whispered, her voice barely audible.

Logan frowned. "What do you mean?"

Laura’s shoulders tensed, and she gripped the chair so hard her knuckles went white. "This place. This... stupid center. I don’t belong here. I can’t—" She cut herself off, shaking her head in frustration, as if the words were too much to get out.

Logan let out a slow breath. He’d seen this before— the tipping point where a kid was ready to run, because staying still felt too risky.

"You don’t have to do this alone," Logan said gently. "If it feels like too much, we can work on that. Together. But you gotta tell me what's really going on, Laura. Or Professor Xavier. Anybody, really.»

For the first time, Laura’s mask cracked. Her eyes filled with frustration, but behind it, Logan could see the fear. The vulnerability she never let anyone see.

"I don’t belong anywhere," she muttered, her voice shaking. "No one gives a damn. Everyone leaves."

Logan stayed silent for a beat, letting her words sink into the space between them.

"That’s not true," Logan said softly. "You’re here. You’re fighting. You show up every day, even when it’s hard. That says a lot about you, more than you think."

Laura’s eyes flickered toward him, suspicious, but something about his tone made her stay.

"You know what I think?" Logan continued. "I think you’re stronger than you think. And if you want to talk, if you want to work through this... We’re all here. You don’t have to run."

Laura didn’t respond right away, but her shoulders slumped just a bit. The tension that had been coiling inside her all day seemed to ease, if only slightly.

"I don’t know if I can," she muttered.

Logan nodded, standing up slowly and giving her space. "You don’t have to decide today. Just know that the door’s open whenever you’re ready."

He started walking toward the door, expecting her to stay where she was, but then he heard her voice again, small and uncertain.

"Logan?" she asked, and for the first time, she used his name instead of calling him "Mr. Howlett."

"My name is Logan but for some legal reason you have to call me Mr.Howlett," he would say on the first day of school every year.

He turned around, his brows raised.

"Thanks," she said quietly, her gaze dropping back to her hands.

Logan nodded, a faint smile tugging at the corner of his lips. "Anytime, kid."

As he left the room, he felt a familiar heaviness settle in his chest, one that always came after a conversation like that. The weight of seeing a kid like Laura— someone who was so close to falling through the cracks, struggling to keep her head above water.

But for now, at least, she was still fighting. And Logan would be there to help her keep going, one step at a time.

As Logan left the classroom, the conversation with Laura replayed in his mind, lingering like a heavy weight on his chest. It was the kind of talk that always stuck with him, reminders of the pain these kids carried, the damage they fought to keep hidden.

He walked down the empty hallway, each step feeling slower, heavier. His usual routine of checking on classrooms and prepping for the next lesson seemed far away. All he could think about was Laura’s words, her quiet admission that she didn’t think she belonged anywhere, and how familiar that feeling was.

Logan knew that weight all too well.

He pushed open the door to the staff lounge, needing a moment to collect himself. The clock on the wall told him there were still ten minutes before the next class. It wasn’t enough time to shake this feeling, but he’d take what he could get.

Sinking into one of the chairs, Logan rubbed his hands over his face, trying to push the conversation out of his mind. But it wouldn’t leave him. It never did. It wasn’t just Laura. Every kid at the center carried a similar burden. They all had their demons, their scars. And each one of those conversations weighed him down, little by little.

It was part of the job, but that didn’t make it any easier.

The faint sound of a bell rang out in the hallway, signaling the start of the next class. Logan stood up slowly, taking a deep breath before heading out to meet his students. He had to pull it together. For them.

But as he walked back into the classroom, the weight of the conversation with Laura still clung to him like a dark cloud.

The day dragged on, and no matter how hard Logan tried to focus, his mind kept drifting back to the look on Laura’s face— the fear and vulnerability hidden beneath her tough exterior. He kept thinking about how much these kids reminded him of his own past, his own battles.

By the time the final bell rang, Logan was exhausted. Not from the physical strain, but from the emotional toll the day had taken on him.

Just as he was packing up to leave, he spotted Wade through the classroom window. He was standing there with a goofy grin on his face, holding up a small box of donuts and a coffee.

But something felt... off. Wade’s smile didn’t reach his eyes like it usually did. He looked tense, distracted. Logan frowned but said nothing at first.

Wade sauntered into the classroom, his usual bravado on full display. “Hey, I come bearing gifts. You looked like you could use a sugar rush.”

Logan took the coffee, eyeing Wade carefully. “Thanks, man. You okay?”

Wade waved off the question with a laugh that sounded a little too loud. “Me? Of course! I’m always okay. What’re you talking about?”

Logan didn’t press further, but he wasn’t convinced. Wade’s humor had always been a shield, something to hide behind when things got too real. He knew that well enough by now.

"Alright," Logan said quietly, breaking off a piece of the donut and offering it to Wade. "If you say so."

Wade took the donut with a shrug, as if nothing was wrong, but Logan could see the tension in his shoulders. They sat there in silence for a while, chewing slowly. Wade broke the silence first, launching into one of his stories—something about a weird couple at last night’s gig and how he had to improvise a joke to get out of an awkward heckling situation.

Logan just nodded along, smirking occasionally at Wade’s antics. He wasn’t much of a talker, especially compared to Wade, but they had their dynamic down by now. Wade talked, Logan listened. That was how it worked. It wasn’t until Wade’s voice grew a little more strained that Logan felt the crack in his friend’s usual confidence.

As they walked out of the center, Wade was still rattling off his story, his words slightly more rushed than usual.

“I swear, man, if this one guy hadn’t backed off, I would’ve—"

“You sure you’re okay?” Logan asked again, cutting him off, his voice quieter this time, more concerned.

Wade immediately put his mask back on, laughing a little too loudly again. “Of course! Stop worrying about me, peanut. You’ve got your own crap to deal with. Speaking of which, how’s it going with Y/N, huh? Been hanging out together without me, yet?”

Logan rolled his eyes, though Wade’s obvious attempt to change the subject didn’t go unnoticed. “She’s our roommate, Wade.”

“Sure, sure,” Wade said with a wink. “Got it.”

Logan let it go. Pushing Wade wouldn’t get him anywhere. They’d been through this before. He’d talk when he was ready, and when that time came, Logan would be there.

Back at the apartment, the scent of something delicious greeted them as soon as they walked in the door. Y/N was in the kitchen, apron on, stirring a pot of what looked like some kind of stew.

“Hey, perfect timing,” she called over her shoulder. “Dinner’s almost ready.”

Logan grunted a small thank you, setting his bag down by the door, but Wade was, as always, much more dramatic.

“Y/N, you absolute angel,” Wade gushed, dramatically placing a hand over his heart. “I don’t deserve this! But I’ll take it.”

Y/N chuckled, glancing up at them both. “Long day?”

“You could say that,” Wade replied, but his usual humor seemed thinner, more like a front than ever before. He shot Logan a quick look, as if daring him to say anything. Logan just gave a subtle shake of his head and headed into the living room.

The shadows of the day lingered, tightening around him. He settled onto the couch, his mind racing back to Laura’s quiet admission. It was hard to shake the feeling that he was somehow failing her, as if his own past could offer her a lifeline he wasn’t made to provide.

Wade followed him in, his usual bravado on display but lacking its usual spark. “Hey, did you hear me? I was talking about the heckler,” Wade said, attempting to recapture the lightness that had slipped away from him.

“Yeah, I heard you,” Logan replied, trying to match Wade's tone. He could feel the edges of his own thoughts creeping in, threatening to overshadow their banter. “Sounds like you handled it well.”

“Of course! I’m the best,” Wade said with a grin, though it faltered slightly as he caught Logan’s gaze. “Seriously though, what’s up? You’ve been quiet. Did your kids hit you with one of those heavy questions again?”

Logan opened his mouth to respond, but the words stuck in his throat. He didn’t want to drag Wade into his emotional turmoil, especially when his friend was clearly wrestling with something of his own. Instead, he forced a small smile. “Just a long day.”

Wade nodded, his gaze scrutinizing. “You know, you could talk about it, right? We’re here for you.”

Logan shrugged, the weight of Wade’s words hitting harder than expected. He appreciated Wade’s willingness to listen, but he also felt that familiar instinct to shield his friend from the darkness that came with his memories. “I’m good, really.”

Just then, Y/N emerged from the kitchen, carrying a pot. “Dinner’s ready!” she announced, her smile brightening the room. It smelled delicious. He loved that she was settling so well into their dynamic.

“Thanks, Y/N. You’re the best,” Logan said, feeling a warmth spread through him at her kindness.

Wade leaned back on the couch, crossing his arms with a playful smirk. “You’re amazing,” he gushed, placing a hand dramatically over his heart. “You might be my favorite roommate I’ve ever had.”

Y/N chuckled, glancing between them. “Just trying to make something nice. Hope it’s okay!”

“Looks great,” Logan assured her, though he could see the uncertainty flickering in her eyes. She was still getting used to their routine, just as he was getting used to having her around.

As they gathered around the table, Logan focused on the meal, the rich aromas helping to distract him from his thoughts. Wade filled the silence with jokes and stories. Logan nodded along, trying to engage, but he could feel the tension in Wade’s shoulders, just as he sensed it in his own.

After dinner, as Y/N began to clear the table, Logan stood up to help her. “Let me take those,” he offered, reaching for the plates.

“Thanks,” she replied, her eyes meeting his briefly. He appreciated her easy smile, the way she brought a sense of warmth to their home, but he was still aware of how new everything felt.

Wade lingered at the table, looking at both of them with an unreadable expression. “You two sure seem cozy over there,” he teased, but there was a hint of something more serious in his tone.

Logan glared at him from the kitchen as the man just winked.

Bastard.

Once the table was cleared, they settled onto the couch. Logan leaned back, taking a moment to breathe. He felt the weight of the day settle in once more, but he was grateful for the distraction of Y/N and Wade. No matter how heavy the conversations, he knew he wasn’t alone in this.

“Alright, what’s next? Movie night?” Wade suggested, a little too brightly.

“Sounds good to me,” Y/N replied.

Logan nodded, grateful for the opportunity to escape, even if just for a little while. They flicked through the channels, laughter and light banter filling the room, but a part of Logan couldn’t shake the feeling that the shadows were still lurking just beyond the surface. Still, for now, he had this moment— this family —and it was enough.

XXX

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