#i complain all semester about how mentally taxed i am and how much i need a break and the minute i get the break i asked for

[mountmortar]

i think me finally being done with this semester really cements how absolutely lost i am without some sort of deadline hanging over my head because now i'm just sitting here bored out of my mind constantly refreshing my grades to see whether or not my professor put in the final exam for my calculus class yet. and once that happens and i either jump for joy or cry about it i'm diving directly into a book i bought about python and also continuing to self-study java so i'm ahead of the game for next semester's programming class because that way i'll be able to focus more on the next calculus class because i know that one's gonna wipe me the fuck out as well

[fandom-blackhole]

Lilac and Mimosa?

Plant Asks

Lilac: your aesthetic?

I specifically am a mix of dark academia, grunge, and cottage core. I dress more grunge/dark academia, when I try anyway lol, but my decorating leans more towards a mix or dark academia and cottage core.

Mimosa: what are you struggling with right now?

Ok so I need a bit of a rant so I'm using this to do that, but I'm gonna do it under the cut so if you don't want to read through a blocky paragraph you don't have too

So everything im struggling with or worried about is literally revolving around school. So to explain a little I took a year off because last year my anxiety sky rocketed and I wasn't able to make it to classes because I was having several panic attacks just for the thought of going. In the end im kind of glad I did take a year because of covid and everything because from what I heard last semester out there was BAD with covid cases.

Now I am also only one 3 hour class from getting my associates, so I made the decision to take a year for mental health reasons, and so I could work and save up money because I planned on transferring to a university this fall and just sending one class back to finish off my associates. This idea has left me with nothing but constant worrying. First off every single job I have gotten to save money has fallen through in some way shape or form. There isn't much in small town Kansas, and because of my anxiety it's really hard for me to work in retail or at a restaurant, I've done both in the past and because I don't emote much people always assume im a bitch no matter how hard I try. So I've looked for smaller things, I babysat for a while, and still do occasionally, but I went from get like $150 a week to roughly $20 here and there because the hours changed. Then I was watching a dog for my sister's friend because her mother didn't want it home alone while she was at school. And that was nice and all until they started complaining about paying me too much, I asked for 10$ a day and I was watching the dog from 7:30 am to 3:30-4 pm AND I was feeding the dog so in reality I was loosing money because that dog went through bags of food like they were nothing. Now we are at the present where I have no job and 20$ to my name. I still have some scholarship money saved away but I have nothing and im so fucking scared because I come from a very lower middle class family, no one can help me. Not to mention no one knows where our tax info is so I havent been able to finish my FAFSA application yet....

As for my next worry, the university I applied to has yet to send me an email or letter or even call me. I don't know what to do and the only thing I got from them was an email saying they got my application. I want to call them but just thinking about it gives me cold sweats and makes me nauseous. But I'm gonna have to get over that and call them soon.

Right now, my only idea is to go back to the community college i was attending and spend a year there taking more classes, purely because I changed my major so there are classes I can take for that while I try and get everything under control.

I just feel like I'm falling into the hole that I told myself I wouldn't. My biggest fear is being stuck here in small town Kansas working a factory job and barely scrapping by. I've seen what that does to the people close to me, and I can't end up like that.

I don't know, I just needed the rant and this showed up, so sorry anon for clogging up your ask with this, but I needed to get this off my chest. Much love darling 💕

[a-woman-apart]

Falling in Fall

The change of seasons can bring a number of challenges. Some of these can be psychological, and others, physical. For one thing, my nose has been running like an Olympic sprinter, and every so often my shallow breathing is interrupted by a “Dracula sneeze”. Allergies are just another energy drain on my already taxed faculties. My fatigue has risen to the point that I scheduled yet another appointment with my primary care physician to try to figure out whether there is a physical component to something that very well could be largely psychological.

I told my doctor about my depression- which she rated as “moderate to severe” based on a screening- and she said that it may indeed be causing my fatigue, but she wanted to rule something else out. She noted that I had complained of fatigue before, and that it may be caused partially by all of the psych drugs that I take, since all of my previous blood tests had come back normal (thyroid, iron levels, etc.). The only test that I had never received was one for vitamin D deficiency. She ordered that test for me, and told me to take vitamin D3 and B12, in addition to the multivitamin I told her I was already taking. Hopefully these will help alleviate some of my symptoms.

It is no secret that there is a big chance that I have simply run myself into the ground. I took four classes over the summer- two in summer I and summer II respectively- as well as working at a dollar store on the weekends. I also took voice lessons during summer I. During the 10 days in between the end of summer II and the beginning of fall semester, I was actually working three jobs. I had given notice at one job and I was in the middle of fulfilling the two weeks when I started the third one, a retail job. I had completed summer with four A’s and one B, and I had worked my tail off to achieve that.

Honestly, I do not know if I should be proud of what I accomplished, or whether I should kick myself for stretching myself so thin. I did what I had to do to survive. Now I receive SSDI, so I can just focus on my main job and on my classes; no more second job. The main problem now is my depression, which arose immediately when I started having to go back on campus again. Musically, I did not get to do most of the things that I wanted to do over the summer, and I have felt as though I am lagging behind my classmates, both in terms of creativity and enthusiasm. Maybe it isn’t fair to compare myself to them, because I was working a lot and I had CORE classes to be concerned with, but I still feel less and less like an “authentic” music student every day.

I was supposed to be graduating at the end of fall, but I ended up dropping Chorus, a classical voice ensemble that I needed to graduate. Two weekends had passed and I realized that each time I was too exhausted to focus on the material for Monday. Even though the nature of old spirituals is to deal with deep pain, I just couldn’t hear myself harmonizing to “Old Wayfaring Stranger” and crooning on about how lost I was. Despite this, I did enjoy a lot of things about singing with the group, but I just couldn’t picture myself on stage with them this year. This kind of music has to come from the heart, and my heart was not in it this time.

Ultimately, I really wrestled with the idea of just fulfilling my final ensemble requirement in the spring. Even if I had graduated in the fall, I wouldn’t be able to walk until after spring semester anyway. I have just been possessed by this terrible sense of urgency and desperation as my education is drawing to a close. I wanted so badly to be done, to be holding my degree in my hands, to realize that I had actually done it. Now two years stretch into three (or four, if you count my prereqs), and I still don’t know if I’m doing all of this correctly.

Even though I can hear my best friend saying in my head, “It’s a marathon, not a sprint” I can’t help but feel at least somewhat disappointed with how things have gone. When I talk to my caseworker about my depression these days, she asks “What do you think is causing this?” or “Why do you feel this way?” and I can only come up with vague generalities. “I just feel tired all the time” or “I don’t know, it just feels like everything is too hard” and “I just don’t have the energy to do the things that I used to do.” She suggests that maybe nothing has changed, that maybe I am creating difficulties for myself. She suggests affirmations. She reminds me of how much I already accomplished, and again, how nothing has really changed.

I cannot explain how things have changed, but they have. Depression has settled on me like a heavy cloak. I just feel weighted down; I just feel heavy. Moving my limbs takes more effort these days. I derive little to no pleasure from anything that I do. In fact, food might be one of the few things that I am still more-or-less able to enjoy, as strange as that may sound. The only other thing I can think of that really helps is listening to music. In general, though, it is a struggle to get out of bed every morning, not always because I feel depressed but more because of the physical exhaustion that can be associated with depression. A lot of the time, I just feel numb and empty, almost like I am only existing as a theoretical concept.

Even when I look back at everything that I “accomplished’ over the summer, it feels like those things happened to someone else. It all feels so distant and far away; it doesn’t feel like me. I can’t help but wonder if there was a brief wave of hypomania that propelled me through all of that, and this is the major “wipeout”. That was the crescendo and this is the diminuendo. Such is the bipolar tradition of dancing between two poles.

You know that depression is severe when you have to start letting things go, when suddenly you realize why mood disorders are accepted by the government as a disability. The weekend that I almost committed suicide was a weekend where I was expected to go to my retail job and participate in a massive inventory that might’ve lasted until 2 am. I had already given in my two weeks’ notice, but my time was not supposed to be up until the 17th of September and it was only September 8th. Based on how I had been feeling physically earlier that day, and emotionally even a week before that, I knew that I probably should not attempt it. Not to mention the fact that I had had school on Monday morning.

In the end, based on advice from concerned family, I dropped the job early, and I dropped that Monday morning class. I spent the weekend eating soup and drinking tea, and watching Hulu in my pajamas. Sure, I needed it. Sure, I had been doing too much, but even though I have less responsibilities now my recovery is moving at a snail pace. The problem is that I felt like I could do anything before, and suddenly that feeling was taken away from me. Maybe thinking that I could do it all was fairly erroneous. My point is, that depression has taken away my ability to do things, including some things that I really love. Sure, nobody wants to work a second job, but I had made a commitment and I was unable to follow through. Chorus was not my first choice in an ensemble, but my goal was to graduate in the fall and I did not meet that goal.

I’m sure you��re thinking “So what? Life goes on”. The truth is that I have always been afraid that life would go on without me. I spent almost five years in the tenacious grip of bipolar disorder. Hospitalizations for me were a yearly affair. I was on an off medication, and in and out of my mind. It was a dark period in my history, and towards the end of it I had already given up on having a life and a future. All of my college dreams, all of my goals for work and a social life, I had given up on all of it. I was just existing from day to day, too numb to even care that I had become completely broken.

Then a series of events happened that slowly changed my perspective and gave me hope. I moved out of my parents’ house. I started volunteering. I started working. I started going to school. Slowly the pieces of the puzzle started to come together. The more success I experienced, though, the more that I have been afraid that it will all be taken away from me. I have been afraid that this is all some big misunderstanding, that no, I am not capable of doing these things that I have been doing for almost five years now. One day, the “real me” will come back in and dash to pieces all of the beauty that I have been able to cultivate for all of this time.

Really, though, I have been more than fortunate, and I always used to attribute that good fortune to a higher power. Recently, though, as you all know, the foundations of my faith have been shaken. That is a struggle that is really meant to discussed in another post; actually, there are many posts on here regarding my deconversion. I don’t think, however, that I can ever totally discuss my mental health without including that component. Maybe, one day my apostasy will be matter-of-fact for me, but right now I am not there yet.

Despite everything that is happening on the inside, there are certain outward factors that have contributed to my depression. My dad is going through some serious challenges with his health. Again, this would be a good time to call on God, if I still believed in the existence of an all-powerful God. I do believe that there are some things that we cannot explain, and that it is possible for someone to make an incredible turnaround. Human beings are more resilient than we realize. There are documented instances of when someone has made a remarkable recovery by believing they had received a special medical treatment that they never actually received. In other words, I will never fully dismiss faith as important to someone’s recovery, but at this time I am very much preparing for the worst.

So, do I still have hope? Yes, and no. It is unmistakable that I have made some amazing strides in my life, and that I am likely to continue to experience some degree of success in the future. Even though I have had to drop things, “functioning” is not really the problem for me. I still eat, bathe, and sleep. I still get up and go to work and school. The problem is the feeling. Yes, I know that emotions aren’t everything, but anhedonia (lack of pleasure in things once enjoyed) is a very real and devastating symptom of depression. Also, the physical pain, the fatigue, and the daily struggle to just fucking move takes its toll as well. It is incredibly exhausting to fight symptoms all day long, and I am so tired of going from depression medicine to depression medicine trying to find something that really works. What it all boils down to is, “I was ‘fine’ at one point- why can’t I be ‘fine’ now?”

I’ll end with a Paramore lyric from the song “Hard Times” off the album “After Laughter”.  

All that I want / Is to wake up fine / Tell me that I’m alright / That I ain’t gonna die / All that I want / Is a hole in the ground / Tell me when It’s alright / For me to come out

Hard times / Gonna make you wonder why you even try / Hard times / Gonna take you down and laugh when you cry / These lives / And I still don’t know how I even survived / Hard times (Hard times)

And I gotta get to rock bottom!

[gh0stbear]

just more venting

in no particular order, some things that are quickly eating away at me:

chastizes me for being honest with my feelings and snaps at me for it constantly

criticizes every fucking decision I ever make!! (e.g. “I’m going to buy a $30 pedicure when i get my tax return after this semester from hell” “...” “what?” “i just can’t believe you would do something so stupid just so you can come back and complain every other week about having an empty pantry”)

repeatedly tells me I'm sharing too much of how i’m feeling (whether positive or negative) and it's overwhelming her

hardly ever offers praise for my accomplishments, when i always go out of my way to do it for her

tries to make me feel bad about not knowing much about her in way of trivial things like her favorite color or animal, even though she only seems to ever talk about her life when she's angry about a specific person or situation and otherwise does not tell me ANYTHING--normally, I’m a very attentive person when it comes to my friend’s likes and interests

when I'm in a good mood, rejects my displays of affection and brushes off/ignores any excitement I try to share with her via phone calls or sending her links to things I found

gets angry when I display signs of neurodivergent behavior (e.g. going nonverbal, not speaking loud enough, rambling, not being able to stop talking, talking about a special interest, laughing off my excitement, etc. etc.) even when I try really hard to “correct my behavior”

complains about her amazing, sweet, humble, kind boyfriend who worships the ground she looks down on because of those very traits, knowing that I would kill to have someone like that in my life and i’m desperately lonely

makes everything hetero (even characters widely accepted as queer in canon and/or in fandom) and plays the victim when I mention how that bothers me, a queer person who uses these characters to cope

throws away comments that imply i am weak/don’t try enough/have no reason to complain just because she never fucking stops or does anything that doesn’t fit into her robot-like rational view of the world

THEN gets upset when she senses (because I never fucking voice my feelings anymore when it comes to her) that I’m comparing myself to her even though she does it ALL THE TIME

and maybe the thing that upsets me the most!!

resents and guilt trips me for admitting myself into a mental hospital when things finally reached a tipping point, even though she's (A) encouraged me to admit myself in the past, (B) ignored weeks of me trying to tell her that I was struggling and needed support she wouldn't give, and (C) done all of the aforementioned bs DESPITE ME ALSO making sure she had the facility’s contact info when i didn’t even give that information to my parents

do not r*///*g

I leave conversations feeling angry and frustrated and hurt more often than not these days, but I’m too afraid of saying anything so as not to upset her as if she isn’t always upset with me anyway!!!

[bloginstantmooncollector-blog]

How much should I expect to pay for car insurance? 19 year old African American in Georgia.?

"How much should I expect to pay for car insurance? 19 year old African American in Georgia.?

Driving a 1999 jeep grand cherokee or a 99 honda civic. What do you think I should expect to pay?

BEST ANSWER:  Try this site where you can compare quotes: : http://averageinsurancecost.xyz/index.html?src=tumblr 

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Listen it has crossed my mind, since i live in an area with many, many 1965,66 mustangs (that are half restored, with okay engines) for sale for like 1200$ right, pretty beat up, but motor is fine. and i am 16, and i see these mustangs fly by, unnoticed and un-bought, and i thought i might want one for myself, for personal use. so what would be a average yearly (monthly also if you can) insurance cost, for personal use, say 5000-12000 miles a year, don't give me crap about mpg, or safety, or you won't find one for that price (looking at local paper, 8 listings, lowest one 750$ runs!, highest 1500$ runs!) okay THESE ARE ALL COUPES!!! NOT FATBACKS, (But try and list if you can, sepretly of course) PS: DON'T ANSWER THIS IF YOU HAVE ABSOLUTELY NO IDEA WHAT YOU ARE TALKING ABOUT, PREFERABLE MUSTANG INTHUSIST, OR OWNER PLEASE!!! i am 16, no bad driving record, curently male, white, kentucky citizen, well another question, how much do you think a passenger and drivers side door for a 1965/66 coupe would go for, and what about a seat (passenger/driver) saw one that was close to restored missing a few things. thought i might ask as well. please help!""

""Young adult, no health insurance, I need help!?""

I am going to make this simple as possible: During this year, Jan to March, I have been on my parent's insurance, NJ FamilyCare, which we were enrolled under free-care because we were horribly under the poverty line, or above it? We're poor, that's it. And on April 1st, I was terminated from my insurance, they are saying I am 19 years of age, thus I have no insurance. Late August we (as a family) re-applied with all our names, and sent the papers in. But with a lot of research, I knew I shouldn't have been, under the Affordable Care Act I should have been on my parent's insurance until the age of 26. I meet the requirements: 1. Dependent Adult (19 years old) 2. Full - time student, no college insurance. 3. No insurance for 6 months now. 4. Not employed. I know for a fact, that being a full-time student, and being unemployed, shouldn't affect this, but maybe it is? I talked to a representative from the welfare office, (where my parents applied) and the lady (rudely) told me that because I am 19, and in school, I was terminated. And my social worker won't be done looking at the papers until late November. WTF? That doesn't make sense, so I kept the battle on, and told her that I should be covered under the law. But after some bullsh*tting around, she hung up on me. So I called again. And this time, another lady was saying, her son who is 20 years old, is insured under her insurance, and that I should come in with my parents, and tell our social worker that I am a full time student, who can't afford to be employed, (because of my 21 credit semester), I am dependent, and I have no job. I was like, well, it's not like I don't want a job, I just can't find the time to have one. I used to work 12 hour shifts, so don't think I don't like to work. The main reason I need the insurance, is because of my ADHD and Mania. I also always get sick, and have kidney problems. But with this, I still can't imagine why I was terminated. The lady told me I shouldn't have been under the law, but different people have different ideas... So, I will go to my social worker on the Tuesday, and find out what's happening. But I know I should be covered, and at least for my sake until I am 23-24. To which I plan to graduate and get my own insurance, and home. But if it doesn't work out, what other low-payment options are there? I heard about NJ Protect, but it's expensive on my part, and no way can I burden my parents with out-of-pocket payments. Thanks in advance.""

""How long until a DUI goes off your driving record, for insurance purposes?

My husband got one in 05 in Washington State. I heard it was three years and then you don't have to disclose the DUI to an insurance company. I will be policy shopping soon and I don't want my rates any higher than necessary.

18 Year Old Male's Car Insurance?

Hi, I passed my driving test in September 2010. I've been looking at insurance quotes for small run arounds like Renault Clios, Vauxhall Corsa's, Volkswagen Polo's etc but cant find anything lower than 6000, and thats without evening paying another 1400 for the car itself ! I've been thinking about getting insured on my dads Toyota Corolla, its a 1.4 diesel hatchback and he's had his license for 30 years and his premium is 400. If i were to get insured on it the price would be 2500, do you think thats worth it or is it better to shop around and get insured on my own name ? I just want to use the car now and then rather than using it regularly because i dont really need to right now..""

""My 18-year-old brother is addicted to meth. He wants to quit, but can't afford rehab, no insurance.?""

He is not interested in NA or any faith-based program. Are there any proven state-funded programs or at least semi-affordable programs? He lives in Cali. He dropped out of high school and has little motivation to do anything, despite being smart and good-looking. My parents basically let him do whatever he wants, and I don't trust them to change or be able to help. He wants to learn to discipline himself and get a job, etc. but first he needs to kick the drugs.""

Proof of insurance.?

I feel like an idiot asking this question but what do i bring to prove proof of insurance? is it possible to send the latest copy of my health insurance bill? or is there a specific piece of paper?

Health Insurance in California!?

Hi there, My girlfriend and I are getting married next year. I am British and she's American and I'm going to move to California to live her. I am just wondering how the whole health insurance matter works in California as there is no national health insurance as far as i know! Thanks guys!""

Average cost for motorcycle/scooter insurance?

Im considering getting a scooter or small motorcycle, and was just trying to estimate my monthly payments, including insurance. Could you please give me an estimate or exact numbers on how much i should expect to pay? And is it generally cheaper with a smaller bike? cheapest with a scooter? Im 25, no accidents or tickets whatsoever, and am looking for something between 80 and 250 ccs.... Thanks!!!!!!!""

Should you be able to buy home owners insurance when your house catches fire?

Your house catches fire. You call the fire department and as they're fighting the blaze, you're on the phone looking for home owner's insurance to cover your loss. Do ...show more""

Why public opt for health insurance and not public opt for health auto insurance?

Just a random question. Auto insurance is required in most (if not all) states. Health insurance is not yet. They both cost about the same out of pocket. Just curious as to why people who support public option are not also complaining about the cost of mandatory liability.

We res the cheapest place to get car insurance?

We res the cheapest place to get car insurance?

How is automobile insurance not extortion?

How is automobile insurance not extortion?

How much would insurance be for a seventeen year old female driving 1999 Chevrolet?

I am sixteen i turn seventeen soon. My grandma will not keep me on her insurance About how much will insurance be for me as a 17 year old female driving a 1999 Chevrolet

Unemployment Insurance in California?

I currently receive unemployment insurance. On the check stub it states that my claim expires on 07/2008, although the balance noted on there is less than what I usually receive. I believe its because the 6 month period has ended. My questions is, can I reopen up the claim? Am I still eligible to receive my unemployment insurance until my claim has expired which is 07/2008? I was told that you can claim unemployment insurance for a year, so I don't understand why I only received it for 6 months. I was with my previous employer for 7 years, so it's not like I worked wherever for a short period of time. And I am actively seeking a job, although I have a few expectations so I haven't accepted any offers plus I'm a single mother and I have to work around my parent's schedule cause its way too expensive to leave my daughter at a decent daycare that I can trust. Hopefully someone out there can help me with a few information.""

Dodge Stealth insurance with a salvage title?

How will the fact that the 1991 Dodge Stealth I'm planing on buying has a salvage title affect my insurance? I got quotes from Progressive Gieco Esurance and Allstate from anywhere from 675 to 780 for 6 months. So anyone have any ideas on how its going to change or if I can even get it insured? If it matters the engine went out and was rebuilt.

I haven't received my national insurance?

I'm 16, going to turn 17 this year. I am from Bolivia (south america) I have live in the UK for 7 years and I don't received any benefits ... I haven't received my national insurance and i don't know why if any one knows why or how i can get? then please tell me thank you""

""Cheap car insurance, I'm 21 had my license 2months?""

Hi I'm in the uk, I'm male, 21, had my license 2months and I need cheap car insurance please.""

Lamborghini insurance price?

please tell me the price of lamborghini insurance. I am looking for a 2009 Gallardo [ cost 220,000 dollars] i am 32 and have a clean traffic record in everything!! dont say theres an old saying if you have to ask u cnat afford!! p.s. i make 500k a year i have been looking for insurance and have an answer just trieng to see what you guys think im not sh*tting you!!""

Is my car insurance going to be cheaper because i getting a learners permit first?

Is my car insurance going to be cheaper because i getting a learners permit first?

""Whats a good, less expensive, insurance for a younger driver?""

i'm 19 and have had my liscence since i turned 16, i have a clean driving record and even got a perfect score on my driving test 3 years back. My car's been under my dad's name for the last three years but i plan to move out soon and want to switch the car into my name. does anyone know of a good, less expensive car insurance that would be affordable, and not have high rates just because i'm a younger driver.""

Would vehicle wrapping my car a different colour effect insurance cost much / at all?

Hi I work at a vehicle graphics / signs company Weve had an idea that my car would look amazing in a different colour and we can get the wrapping material in cheap. So it will be about 40x cheaper than spraying. I have also seen a carbon wrapped golf the other day and it was perfect. Only question is if i was to make the colour change ( car doesnt usually come in this colour) would it make the insurance cost go up much or at all? Also same with alloy wheel spraying? Many Thanks

50cc moped scooter insurance?

I live in PA. I am thinking about geting a moped scooter 50cc. About how much does insurance cost?

""My husband is retiring next year and I am unemployed and only 55, how do I get affordable health insurance?""

I have alot of health issues and I need to make sure I have coverage. I have been looking for a job with benefits, but so far no luck. I am 55 and my husband will be 63 when he retires. I need an insurance with no prior health exceptions.""

Car insurance question?

What is the normal price range for monthly payments on car insurance? I'm 23, female, with no prior accidents.""

How much should I expect to pay for car insurance? 19 year old African American in Georgia.?

Driving a 1999 jeep grand cherokee or a 99 honda civic. What do you think I should expect to pay?

Name on car insurance?

Is it possible to buy a car under my name but have the car's insurance under my dads name?

""Can't afford car insurance, parents won't help?""

OK im 17 and a guy. I passed my test about a month ago so i can drive :) My parents agreed that they would pay insurance for me if i paid for lessons and the car. Ive saved up for years and scrounged all the money i have and had just enough. Anyway i now only have 1500 left and i cant find any car insurance near to that. My dad keeps saying he will do it one evening but its been a month so i asked him today because he had nothing to do, and he just started shouting at me for always going on and i should go get a '******* job because im a lazy little ****'. This is pretty unfair as i work hard at school, get straight A's, never in trouble with the police like most people who live near and don't drink or do drugs unlike most my friends. How should i get him to pay for it, its not even though he's paying all of it, im putting up prob 60% of it and he promised to pay for all of it :(""

NC Divers License and insurance?

My boyfriend is looking to get his license for the first time and we have a question about insurance. As far as I know, in the state of NC you cannot get your license w/o having car insurance. How can you get your license w/o having a car to issue insurance on? In other words, if he doesn't have a vehicle, why do they require you to have insurance before obtaining your license?""

""For a 16 year old how much does insurance cost for a year, an average, and what is out there that is the best?""

insurance plan, only answer if u have insurance or have experience""

Michigan Motorcycle Insurance?

I live in Michigan I only ride my motorcycle during the spring and summer, which comes out to be about 6 months of the year. the rest of the time the bike is stored, with no riders. My question is can I get some sort of insurance where I'm covered for six months and the rest of the time it in storage it's on a storage like insurance? I know you can in New Jersey because my friends have in however can you in Michigan? if so could you post a link or where you got this infor from so i can contact them further thank you""

Individual health insurance?

I am currently shopping around for individual health insurance and just wondered if anyone had any helpful info in regards to different companies. Who do you currently have health/dental/vision/life insurance through? I have been looking at Blue Cross Blue Shield but I'm just not sure. I am engaged and will eventually want to add my future spouse, therefore needing a family plan. I know this will vary depending on what type of coverage we want and what we are willing to spend. I do not have a very large budget for all of this but do know it's important. Trying to find the best deal out there for an affordable price. Thanks for any helpful advice! :)""

Is ehealth insurance good?

i just bought insurance there. then checked out scams im freaking out a little but my mom says in no big deal. its just other broker trying to compete. I called ehealth and asked if i was to buy from the medical place myself would it cost me less? They said no, they charge no brokers fee. so Im a little confused. Help anyone? thank you!""

Anyone know a cheap insurance companies for first time drivers?

I've got my test tomorrow, so i want to try and set up some insurance but its hard for me to find quotes under 2k""

North Carolina Health Insurance?

Right now I have blue cross and blue sheild insurance. It's becoming ridiculous to pay each month and deductibles are through the roof! I'm a healthy 25 yr old female. I need to know, what are some insurance companies in the state of North Carolina that are cheaper, but are still helpful with doctor's visits and prescriptions. What health insurance do you have and what's the cost? Any help or opinions about would be great! thanks:))))""

Do transformers buy life insurance or car insurance?

i recently bought a Transformer and i'm not sure what kind of insurance i should get for it. They're alive and stuff so maybe life insurence but also they are a vehicle when they are in disguise, what do you think?""

""If my car is totalled, will the people's insurance who hit me give me kelly blue book value and take my car?,?""

I was t-boned the other day and am pretty sure my car will be totalled, it still runs great, and i love the car. the accident was the other persons fault. if it IS toatalled, will her ...show more""

Is the discount rate for car insurance for students GPA cumulative?

I am in California and my semester GPA fell a little under 3.0 but my cumulative is still 3.0 will that affect my car insurance discount? And if so by how much?

How much will insurance go up with PLPD as a teen driver involved in fender bender?

I have a plpd insurance and am a teen driver..got into a fender bender yesterday and was at fault ..how much should my insurance go up?

How much will it costs me to cancel my Car Insurance?

Hi guys, I pay monthly installments on my car insurance and renewed my policy on 2nd February. Anyhow to cut a long story short I've bought a house with my fiancee and I work in Leeds now, and figured that it's cheaper to buy a monthly ticket for the train than it is to drive there, so want to cancel my insurance asap. I rang my insurance firm and they didn't give me an exact cost, only an admin fee of 29.95 to cancel, but mentioned that it is carried out on a 'pro-rata' basis. What does this mean and how much roughly am I looking to pay? I pay 51.00 a month at the moment...I'm confused.com! Thanks guys!! D""

How much would motorcycle insurance cost?

Hello, i'm 20 about to be 21 in december, but i'm gonna be going for my motorcycle license in a week, an planning on buying a kawasaki ninja 250R since it has good reviews, but i'm wondering how much it would be for insurance i'm just going for motorcycle license cause i don't like cars, trucks etc. but yeah so i don't have a normal license so i have no driving record of crashes etc. i'm in indianapolis, IN cause i know states vary. Rob""

""Can I drive someone esles car, I f I dont have car insurance?""

Hi everybody, I have a quick question. My friend sometimes gives me a car. His car is insured and registered. But I don't have a car and don't have a car insurance obviously. Another thing is that he was my roommate and my drivers license are registered for the same address as his dl. Right now I live in another place. I have heard that if your drivers licenses are registered for the same address it might be a problem. So my questions are: - Is that ok for me to drive his car? - And should I change my drivers licens address ? or this is not true about this rumor?""

How much do you guys pay for Honda S2000 car insurance?

I got a quote for 490 for 6 months. Full coverage from state farm for a 04 Honda s2000. Is this good?

Has anyone moved to pennsylvania from new jersey?

i was considering moving to pennsylvania because I've heard the cost of living is a little less expensive than what it is in NJ.And I see alot of people are living in PA that commute to work in NJ/NY so there must be some reason people would be willing to make such a long commute just to live in PA.I live in Northern NJ somewhat close to Newark with my parents and i wana move out but cant afford the rent in NJ.I need some advice and opinions on whether moving will be better or will I be better off staying in NJ.Ive been considering also Washington DC, Maryland,Virginia. Can anyone tell me what towns in PA are cheapest to live, is car insurance cheaper than NJ etc. things like that.Thanx in Advance. O yea and if i wanted to keep my job and commute how far is the drive from nj to pa.i work close to NY""

If a have a named Driver on my car insurance will it make a any Difference in price?

If a have a named Driver on my car insurance will it make a any Difference in price?

What car insurance do you recommend?

There's probably 100's of car insurance companies. What do you have? Are you happy with it? How do the rates compare? How do you get treated after a claim? Ever dealt with those advertised on TV? Who have you had bad experiences with?

Insurance while in the military?

How does insurance work when the car is registered in another state which for me is california and I'm currently stationed in texas. What address would i use if my car is with me in texas but is registered in cali.

Motorcycle insruance guess for 17 year old female (Indiana)?

I'm a 17 year old female and I live in Indiana so I would not be riding year round. I have good grades and I will have completed the safety course. I'm looking at probably something older and 400cc. If any other under 18 year old has insurance and knows PERSONALLY how much it would cost please let me know.

How can we get cheaper car rental insurance(coming from BC) when renting a car for a week from Trudeau Airport?

A year ago when we rented a car it was exorbitant(over $500) and I know the insurance is available in Manitoba if you buy it there before departure. Does BC have a similar set up for car insurance? Any assistance you may give would be greatly appreciated.

Car Insurance for a 17 year old ? Rough price needed.?

Hi, My son is 17 in a couple of months, need a rough guess on how much insurance will be on a low groupage car (peugeot 106 1.0 etc). He'll be provisional but will have his mother on the insurance also. We're in Teesside so not out in the sticks but not a city postcode. Any rough ideas will be great. Thanks.""

Car insurance rates in Ontario for new driver?

I plan to import my '01 Camry from USA to missisuaga. How much shd I expect to pay p.m. in car Insurance rates ? I have 3 yrs clean driving history in USA.Will my driving history in USA help with getting a better rate in canada ? Initially I will have only a US drivers license.Pls help shed light on my doubts ..

How much should I expect to pay for car insurance? 19 year old African American in Georgia.?

Driving a 1999 jeep grand cherokee or a 99 honda civic. What do you think I should expect to pay?

Why is my car insurance ridiculously expensive?

I've been using go compare for a Peugeot 206 1.1 litre petrol, and have been given quotes of about 6-8 thousand pound! I know for young drivers (im seventeen) car insurance is expensive but I was expecting 2-3 grand, am I maybe using a bad site?""

Paying for car insurance I don' need while being oversees?

I plan an extended overseas travel this summer (lasting about 3-4 months). During this time, I will not be using my car in the U.S. I simply will lock it in a garage. I'd like to know how I can avoid paying for my car insurance (or lower my insurance bill) during this time. I understand that I can simply return my plates and drop the insurance before leaving but then upon my arrival back to the U.S. I will be with no insurance at all, and will need to get a new one (this will not happen instantly). Is there an option or insurance company that serves people who are away from the U.S. but who want to get covered when they return right away?""

How much would my insurance be for a mustang GT if im 18 and no tickets or bad credit?

How much would my insurance be for a mustang GT if im 18 and no tickets or bad credit?

How can I get prenatal insurance?

I live in Iowa and I am pregant my bday is in four days il be 18. I don't have health insurance I live with my bf. I could marry him and have insurance but I want to explore all options but I need. Health insurance what all can I do?

Is there affordable health insurance out there for someone who has had high blood pressure?

Is there affordable health insurance out there for someone who has had high blood pressure?

Can anyone tell me of an affordable health insurance for self employed people?

Can anyone tell me of an affordable health insurance for self employed people?

How much (on average) does it cost to get insured?

I have been doing side cleaning for some friends and family so of course I'm not insured or bonded. But I can make anywhere from $50-$80 for less then 2 hours of work. I started working PT at a cleaning company so that I could get more experience (and a little more pay) and learn a bit about the business. Of course what I'm learning is that instead of making the full $50-$80 for my services I'm making only 20% and the rest of course goes to the company! I feel I can do much better on my own and really want to work towards that so I know my best bet is to get insurance and bonding. Roughly what is the premium for it? I guess I wouldn't need to be insured for no more then $25,000 -$50,000. And are bonding and insurance liability fees seperate?? Any help would be appreciated. thanks""

Anyone know anything about Alliance for Affordable Services ...its a health benefits program ??

I got a call about this program, and met with the representative today..everything sounds good..but I'm trying to do some research online about customer reviews and can't find ...show more""

How much cash will be taken due to the Affordable Health Care Act?

I ask how much cash will the IRS deduct from my refund due to me not having any health insurance? OK I know its bad that I have no health care but I just found a full time job a month ago that provides health care that I can afford and use. I did not have any health insurance for the 2012 year and just learned that the IRS will take cash from you refund due to the poor, i.e, me, not having insurance. So can somebody tell me (who is actuality intelligent and knows taxes) how much cash I will loose for this B.S. Law? P.S. Please don't comment just to tell me I'm a lazy jerk who just won't spend the money to get health insurance. I work very hard and work two part time jobs just to have food and shelter. I understand that insurance is high due to people getting hurt and can't afford the bill so it gets written off. When I get hurt or sick I stay at home and heal myself, I don't abuse the system! I just can't afford the monthly payment for health care with my other bills!""

Confused about insurance law in CA?

Hey guys, I obtained my license a couple weeks back but I do not have insurance, meaning I was not added to my parent's premiums yet and do not have my own as well. However, the car that I drive does have insurance on it. Just clarifying, but technically, it is illegal for me to drive as of right now correct? Or is it legal for me to drive as long as the car has insurance? Thanks!""

Which auto insurance do you recommend?

I had a Scion XA 2006 and I just got a MINI Cooper 2007. I was insured under my parents insurance at AAA but with the change of cars our insurance would increase twice as much. I'm going to leave their policy and open my own. I'm 22 and I'm a full time student (GPA 3.5), which insurance do you recommend? I have road side assistance with AAA.""

Car insurance......Anyone else's gone up this year?

I'm still driving the same car and living at the same address, and I also took off 2 other named drivers from my policy to try to minimise the cost but it's still gone up by about 60 pounds......""

Can I pay a AAA Auto Insurance bill online?

I'm in California but I don't know if that makes any diffrence.

How much a month for loan and insurance for a 350z?

Ok so I'm gonna be 20 in a couple months and I'm tired of driving my crappy integra. I've been saving up and I'm set on getting a 350z. My price range is about 12,000 tops. If I put a down payment of about 5 or 6 grand how much would I pay per month for the loan. And how much would I pay a month for the loan along with the insurance. I'm on my parents plan. I don't know much about interest rates. Can you give me estimates on different lengths of loans and interest rates Thanks ily""

How much is car insurance for a 16 yr old girl in FL?

i want a car, something sporty but it can also be 4 dr too. =]""

I was in a car accident. My car was deem a total lost. The insurance towed my car away. I waited 1 year?

trying to get my claim paid. Today I received a letter from some car auction center, stating that I had to go get my car or they will charge me storage per day. now my car was a honda 05 I originally finaced the car and still owe money on the car. like 13000. The insurance company is not paying my claim. The finance company gave me a charge off on my credit. Now If I go pick up this car. is the car now mines? I do not have the title. How do I get the title.""

""Find the total monthly payment, including taxes and insurance?""

Mortage: 72,890 Interest Rate: 5.5% Term of Loan: 15 years Annual Taxes:$1850 Annual Insurance: $545""

Do I need to switch car insurance for being out of state temperaily? Am I still covered?

I have car insurance in Florida, but I'm going to be going to school in New Jersey for probably for 2 years. Do I need to switch my car insurance or will I still be covered under FL rates? My DL has my Florida address and my car is registered in Florida. I plan on going back, so what should I do? Thanks (I'm with State Farm BTW)""

How much is adding my teenager to my insurance policy?

how much is the averge amount that i would have to pay when i add my teen to my auto-insurance policy..with their own car.

Accounting for Insurance Premium that is Financed?

I'm learning bookkeeping. I have some difficulty getting the right balance sheet entries. ABC LLC has their insurance financed by a third party. Which specific balance sheet accounts are involved in this? I'm assuming it's not a Note Payable - Cash relationship and I don't think prepaid exps are involved either. Much appreciated help

Which type of insurance is the best for a family insurance and Child insurance in India?

I want to know more detail about the insurance in India for Child and Family.

""How can forcing us to buy health insurance, be the same as mandatory car insurance?""

I don't own a car, so I don't pay car insurance. Nobody is forcing me to buy it. But under the Obama individual mandate, we will all have to buy insurance or get fined. This is based on the assumption that you will get sick and not be able to afford your own care, and so will choose to be a burden. Those are a lot of assumptions. Can we force somebody to buy something that they don't want, based on assumptions that may or may not be true??""

Cheapest California Auto Insurance?

Any One Can Tell Me The Cheapest California Auto Insurance

Urgent care? Do I need insurance?

So I really need to go to urgent care but will they even look at me if I tell them I don't have insurance and don't even have a job...? I would go to the hospital... But like I said... I have no insurance and no job.

16 yr old car insurance?

I'm about to turn 16, and about to get a car (Volvo cross country) I will have another 2 main drivers on the account. How much will it be in a roundabout? Also I will be 16^ I have a completely clean record C average And a male""

How much should I expect to pay for car insurance? 19 year old African American in Georgia.?

Driving a 1999 jeep grand cherokee or a 99 honda civic. What do you think I should expect to pay?

https://www.linkedin.com/pulse/americans-excited-brand-new-affordable-2014-health-insurance-branch"

[yeswesaythings]

On Becoming Better

I: Okay, so to start, when do you think your self-improvement journey began?

L: I guess the biggest leg of the journey so far started about the spring semester of college, 2016, I guess I can assign a real start date. The spring semester was probably the worst semester I’ve had so far. Luckily, there’s only been three, so it’s like a small pool to pick from, but hopefully it never gets that dark again. It was just a very bad mixing of things, emotionally and in terms of workload, and I ended up crashing and making a lot of very poor choices grade-wise and physically. So I don’t want to go back there and I don’t want to handle things the way that I handled it back then. I just want to do better, I guess, and that’s the drive that’s kind of been there since that happened.

I: So, is it mainly mental, physical, psychological?

L: I kind of break it up into parts. I have a desire to always be improving physically because that hasn’t always been the case. I’ve gone on little explosions where I’d drop forty, fifty pounds and I get in really good shape and I can run a million years and I can do a pushup for every grain of sand on Earth. And then I have episodes where I just eat and eat and eat and eat and eat and I sleep and I play video games and do absolutely nothing and I gain all the weight back, and then I feel awful about it. So, physically, I definitely want to improve there. Emotionally, it’s kind of been the same story. There are times where I feel absolutely on top of the world. And then there are times where I actually feel like I’m in this absolute pit and I don’t know how to get out of it. There are just times that I just sit around and I do a lot of crying, and just that kind of stuff, I guess. So, I do kind of break it up into different things. I categorize. Like, physically, I want to- It’s a goal, like I want to eat right and work out a certain amount. And if I don’t do that, then I won’t give up and try again next week. I’ll be like, “Okay, I messed up. But let’s keep going. Let’s keep working this week.” Because if I leave it off until next week, then that’s just more room to go backwards and that doesn’t fly. Emotionally, it’s the same deal. I just try to be better. I try to be relatively better every day and obviously, there are external factors that don’t always make that true. But I feel like I try to work on something that gets me down or bums me out, I try to focus on that. And every time it happens, I try to focus on not being as bummed out about it or finding a way to stop being as bummed out about it. Just, something like that.

I: There are some people that are of the opinion that if you want to improve yourself, that you should not be around people that are not in that same mindset. What do you feel about that? For example, there’s the quote, “You are the average of the five people you spend the most time with.” If you’re trying to self-improve and you’re around a bunch of people that themselves, really aren’t looking to improve, is that wise to do on your part, even if you’ve been friends for so long? Do you still associate with them?

L: I definitely haven’t blocked anybody out of my life. That’s a lie, actually. I just realized that. There are a couple people, I guess, that I have blocked out of my life because they were a negative influence on my life. Actually, two people. One of them was this girl that was a huge- She was mentally taxing to be around. She did absolutely nothing but complain to me. She degraded me, she talked down to me a lot, she told me that I wasn’t worth very much. She told me, on thing specifically that I remember, is right after I went through my big black belt test that I lost fifty pounds for. I went through three days of sleepless hell during the test. The second we got out of it, I went to eat to celebrate and she was like, “Hey, you shouldn’t eat like that or you’re gonna gain all that weight right back.” She said things like that and it just, in the moment, it was probably the most hurtful thing. I mean, there have been more hurtful things that have been said, but in that moment it was probably the most angry I’ve been at somebody for saying something. So, I got her out of my life, and she- It was an improvement, absolutely. I don’t miss having that person around. And then there was another that was basically- We had a sort of relationship right at the end of my spring semester, after all of that stuff happened. And she got me involved in things I didn’t want to be involved in, I guess. So, I got out of that situation and I feel like that was definitely a good idea. But I feel like in the general, that most people I haven’t had to remove from my life. Even though some people won’t be in that mindset, they won’t be in the mindset of constantly improving, they still will be the kind of people that learn and they grow, even though they’re not working on it. Or they’re not- It’s not in the front of their mind, I guess. But everyone has the capacity to learn from things, and to grow from their experiences, as long as they realize when they’ve had a learning opportunity. And I feel like, for some people, knowing a learning opportunity comes easily and for some people, it takes a lot of work. And that’s why I’m working on it so hard. Is because I feel like I need more work to realize it, I guess.

I: Do you have an end goal in mind? Or is it just “improve” as the goal?

L: I feel like I do have a couple of end goals in mind. Ideally, I guess, the thing I’ve been looking at physically is I want to get rid of my love handles, which is such a weird, arbitrary goal to have, but I feel like I can get there. I feel like as long as I keep slowly and gradually improving, I can get there in a healthy way, in a more healthy way than just a miracle diet that then I gain them right back, like two months later. And emotionally speaking, I want to be a little bit better at handling things, obviously. Like, that’s the most broad way I can probably describe it, but I want to have a better system for dealing with things. I don’t want to jump to anger at some of the times that I jump to anger. I don’t want to immediately be sad at some points. I want to be the kind of guy that can be stuck in bumper to bumper traffic and not be really all that worried, or be all that anxious.

I: Which of your goals at the moment, or habits, do you think that you’re doing really well on and which are some that you feel like you have been slipping on, or still need major improvement?

L: Well, this week in particular has been a fun one. I got some news that turned out to be fake, and that news drove me up the wall, furious. Like, stark-raving mad. So, I got angry about it and that anger and stress led me to have a couple of days of poor eating habits. I haven’t worked out this week. So, this specific week has been a low, but I’m also planning on turning it around and hitting it extremely hard, starting pretty much right now, I guess. Like, I don’t see any reason to be fed up over it anymore. It’s just kind of like- It’s just one of those things that once you realize it, once you realize that a thing is happening, then that is the moment where you have a choice as to whether or not you’re actually going to act or improve on that thing. If you don’t realize it, if you don’t look inside and you’re like, “Woah, okay, this thing is going on,” then it’s not always as easy as just, “Oh, I should stop being angry”, I guess.

I: I’ve asked you this before, but do you do any sort of meditation or journaling as that source of introspection to fix these sort of things?

L: I am trying to get into meditation more. I used to meditate on and off and I’m trying to get back there now to the point where I meditate. Meditation and yoga, specifically. I’m trying to get some stretching done every morning and a little bit of just breathing and relaxing. Like, focusing on breathing done every night. In terms of journaling, I feel like that could be a very good idea. I haven’t acted on that yet, though. That might be a next step.

I: For people that are wanting to self-improve but they’re not really sure how you even begin something like that- As it is, that idea by itself is extremely vague. What do you tell them? How do I begin this journey?

L: Well, in terms of the physical, I feel like for a majority of people, if you want to improve physically, then there’s a very simple answer. It is: Find someone who definitely knows what they’re talking about. Whether it’s a health advisor or a friend who practices good health, there are people out there who are able to give you much better advice than the Internet can give you. And so, once you realize what a goal of yours is, then it becomes a lot easier to start working towards those goals as long as you have the baseline information. Like, knowledge really is power when it comes to that. But I actually mentioned something that is also very important. I feel like the first step should probably be having those goals. If you don’t know what you want, you just say, “I’m going to improve myself,” then it is just going to be a vague mess. Like, once you say, “I want to improve myself and I want to constantly improve,” you need to have those goals in mind. You need to definitely have specific things that you want to work on, whether they’re small little goals or they’re big, overarching goals, or they’re both. They just need to be goals.

I: A lot of self-improvement advice- For example, if you go on the subreddit for self-improvement, you see all the various things that have people wondering, “How do I do this? How do I better myself?” And the usual examples of things that people tell them to do usually wind up being along similar lines, like eat better, drink more water, sleep more, read more books, this, this, and this. After a while, doesn’t it almost feel like, “Oh, we just all sort of become the same sort of person,”? While we may be a really healthy, good person, it almost feels like we’re losing a bit of our own selves, our own uniqueness. Playing devil’s advocate here.

L: That is a good point. That is 100% a good point. That is why, in terms of some things, I looked at it and I said, “You know what, if I’m going to do this right, I’m going to do it my way.” I’ve had a couple of things where people have thought that I’m not approaching it in the most efficient way possible. And I’ve decided that that’s just going to be because it’s me.

I: What’s an example of that?

L: An example of that is, I have a friend who trains at the same martial arts academy that I do and she eats perfectly. Her diet is absolutely 100% spot-on. And I don’t think she’s had a slip in three years, or something. She does an amazing job keeping her eating habits in check, and because of that, she is very, very in shape. Like, she’s in very good shape because she also works out a lot. And so, I’ve realized that maybe one day I’ll be there, but for now, I still like Wendy’s and Chinese food and tacos and all those things. I still eat those things, I still enjoy those things. I eat more in moderation and I eat not always to be stuffed to the brim. Sometimes I eat just to hold myself over for a while. Sometimes I’ll just have a granola bar or something. But there are still plenty of opportunities where I eat and I don’t feel bad about it. I will have days where I’m like, “Okay, I’m gonna go crazy and I’m gonna binge out,” and that’s just part of the process. Those days don’t always have to be failure days. Those are just days that you have to plan for and you have to take into account, leave in the big picture, kind of.

I: As a more general question, what is it that you think makes you, yourself, unique? Different than other people?

L: Makes me different than other people? Well, I’d say compared to other people…

I: Not just in terms of self-improvement either. Just as your person as a whole, what defines you? It’s a bit of a big question I’ve sprung on you.

L: Yeah, yeah. I’d say I’m happy. I’d say I’m significantly more outgoing then I used to be, at least. I can talk to people, I can have a good time. I hang out with people if I want to, but I’ve also got an introverted side, so some days I like to just be alone, be relaxed, just go on a nice hike out in the woods. I can be fairly energetic. I can be pretty damn energetic, to be honest. Ooh, this is a good question.

I: Take your time.

L: I guess, one big thing that I see is I try my hardest not to complain about things, and I try my hardest not to use things as excuses. For example, even though this week has been kind of a failure for me, and a lot of it is probably because of the things that happened in my personal life, I’m not trying to use that as an excuse. I’m just analyzing it as a failure. But back to the not complaining part, I have noticed recently that there is a lot of inherent negativity in people’s mindsets about things, and I try my hardest not to be negative about everything because I just feel like that degrades the esprit de corps, I think?

I: The overall mood.

L: The mood, the morale. I feel like it needs to be bolstered constantly. It seems like everyone is always down and out about something and I feel like there’s a lot of world out there. And people keep missing the forest, not even through a tree, but through a fucking leaf. That is, actually, funnily enough, something that I’m trying to improve on. Trying to hopefully make people a little bit more optimistic, I guess? It’s one thing that I’d like to do.

I: I mean, if I can be honest with you, you’ve been actually a huge inspiration in terms of self-improvement this last- How long have we been here? Four weeks, so a month or so. Because when I had that conversation with you a couple weeks ago, and I had talked about how I felt that cynicism was the default position for people to go into. It was way too easy to fall into. And then being a positive, genuine, sincere person was really hard to do. As a result, a worthwhile goal I decided after that was that I’m going to become that kind of person. And I don’t know if you’ve noticed at all, I’ve tried to be more positive since then.

L: Yeah, definitely.

I: And the hardest part about it is that when you shift your mindset into thinking when someone says something, instead of agreeing with them, saying, “Yeah, that’s awful, that’s bad,” you sort of have to shift your mind and say, “No, wait a second, let’s look at the positive side of this. There’s something here we can learn about.”

L: Exactly. Now, it’s so easy to just be negative and make degrading jokes about things like depression and suicide and make really dark conversation into your laughing point, your everything, but I feel like for every car that splashes you on a rainy day, there’s a backpack with a laptop in it that didn’t get wet. I feel like for every teacher who drones on and on in class, there’s an opportunity to learn still present. I feel like people view things in the wrong way and it just feels like the kind of thing that everyone can improve on. Like, even the most optimistic person has a bad day.

I: And that’s something I’ve definitely run into as well, that there are times when it just feels like, “I am tired, I am miserable at the moment.” And if someone comes up to me with some sort of complaint, what does my brain want to do? It wants to go, “Yeah!” I want to just say, “Absolutely! Life is awful. Life sucks right now.” And it’s just so much effort and energy to say, “No, come on, let’s be happy. Let’s smile.” And the problem with it, too, is that it can come across as extremely fake, sometimes. If you are always this positive person, there’s this idea that, “Oh, no one is actually that happy all the time. They’re obviously putting up some sort front as a result.” And maybe there’s too much of a stigma against being “fake”. I don’t know, what’s your take on that?

L: I feel like in the context you’re talking about, that could be a sign to a very negative society looking at someone who is different and saying, “Why are they different? Why can’t I be that way?” And instead of trying to improve themselves, they look at that and they say, “Oh, it’s because they’re ‘that way’. It’s because they’re hiding the fact that they’re on the same level as I am, instead of just admitting it, and admitting to how terrible and cynical this world is.”

I: So there’s almost sort of a revealed truth in cynicism people feel. “Oh, if you’ve claimed that the world is awful, then you see something that other people don’t see.” There’s “maturity” to it.

L: Yeah, definitely, definitely, absolutely. It’s almost unfortunate how accurate that is. I mean, you can see it in modern media. A lot, actually. Some of the funniest shows on TV right now- Like, I’ll admit they’re absolutely hilarious, like Rick and Morty and shows like that. They are completely grounded in a very- It’s almost like laughing at how absolutely terrible everything is. And they say it like that. They say it like it’s an absolute fact, that everything has to be terrible. And I just- I mean, if it works for them, that’s cool.

I: But there’s a distinction to be made. That’s a show. In that case, that’s where we put our art, where we put our emotions. And so we can make a show that says, “Everything is awful,” and express our emotions that way, but still admit that the real world itself does not reflect what the show is here. I mean, it’s just like, we enjoy movies with lots of violence and people are getting heads blown off left and right. But we can admit we enjoy that while at the same saying, “We don’t actually enjoy that in real life.” There’s sort of that separation. And so we can enjoy shows like Rick and Morty that say, “Oh, everything is awful,” and cynicism, and we can laugh at it and say, “Ha, there’s a bit of truth to that, sort of.” But then we can look at the real world and say, “But let’s hold on for a second here.” This is a fictional show at the end of the day.

L: Yeah, I definitely agree with that, and I hope that that is the general there. But if I had to judge simply based upon the way some people view everything and how it seems like they can’t get through a full conversation without some sort of negativity, then it gets a little bit more iffy, to me, I guess.

I: How do you convince someone that their viewpoint of the world is wrong? Do you straight out admit and tell them, “I’m sorry, but the way that you view the world is extremely flawed,” or do you basically hope that they learn from example and say, “This person’s actually happy all the time even though I believe the world is awful. Maybe I’m wrong.”

L: I guess leading by example is definitely a better approach. I don’t think that there’s any good way to say, or any constructive way to say, “Hey, you’re digging yourself into a pit of despair and you could snap out of it if you wanted to.”

I: Because with a topic like this, depression always comes in at some point, too, and that’s not something you can tell someone, “Be happy now. It’s your choice.” There are a lot of people who are going for self-improvement that, one of their biggest hurdles is the fact that they are depressed. And so, though they keep improving, they still have that- I don’t know if baggage is the right word, but they have this extra thing that goes along with them, and it’s just a matter of how do you become a more positive person when something that is beyond your control is telling you, “No, too bad”? Another hard question.

L: Oh yeah. That is a part of it that has been an issue in the past. I mean, I’ve been to places where I don’t know if it was a full depression, but it was depressive symptoms, and those depressive symptoms lasted for quite a while. One thing that I realized was that there are things that people say will help with those kind of things. But those things are, like, running, and getting out there, and getting active. And the kind of things that you wouldn’t dream of doing when you’re in that state. The kind of thing that- It’s like the biggest hurdle of the world just to start thinking about doing something that is seen as a solution. Going to get therapy can be seen as giving up. Going for a run, well, most people don’t like running. It’s just that kind of thing, but amplified. So I definitely agree that it is a very difficult place to be, and it makes the journey way harder. I guess it’s an issue of momentum. I mean, no matter where you are in life, if you make a habit out of something, you’re going to tend to do it more often. We’re momentum-based beings. Once we’ve started something, we don’t stop doing something unless we have a reason to stop doing something, unless something makes us stop doing something. So, that’s kind of what helped me. I eventually just started forcing myself to do it, just decided to force myself to do things, and I almost- I kind of channeled the negative energy. Instead of being a, “I don’t want to do this,” into a, “I’m going to do this.” I guess, I kind of tried to channel it into a more determined light. And that’s kind of where I got myself by the end of it. It definitely wasn’t like that at the start at all. But it was just kind of momentum-based. I just had to make that first step. The first step was the hardest step. And then every step after that has been easier and easier.

I: Going back to a comment you said earlier, that seeing therapy, seeking help, is considered giving up, to an extent. It’s perceived as that. Not necessarily that you believe that. But why is there that perception? Why is there this idea that you have to do everything yourself?

L: I feel like it’s sort of a social stigma. I feel like people are- I don’t know, I feel like a lot of modern life has almost become a contest to kind of be like, “I’m going through the most crap, by myself.” Like, “I have put the heaviest workload on me. Look at what I’m doing.” Or, “I am putting the most work on myself,” or “I’m having the worst day,” or “I’m having the worst week,” or “I’m having the worst year,” or that kind of mindset. But even though they have that sort of mindset, at the same time, people will look at people who are trying to get help and look at people who are trying to not have as hard of a time, and they will judge them for it, they will pass judgement. And they will say, “No. What? Why would you do that?” Or, I guess, they just don’t always understand it. I guess on a completely different train of thought, actually, people who don’t need therapy will not understand why you would get therapy. They’ll think, you know, “Why do you need it? It doesn’t make sense.” They’ll be looking from the outside and they’ll say, “But your life seems alright.” So, I guess, people don’t know everything about a situation, so when they look at a situation, they’ll say, “You’re kind of taking an easier way out.” They just don’t understand.

I: It almost seems like the opposite of participation trophies, in a way. You have people complaining that, “Oh, they got a trophy, they got an award for doing nothing at all. They just showed up and participated.” But now it’s suddenly a- They’re trying to get an award for being- I don’t know, something that’s not actually a thing that you want.

L: Yeah, I guess that ties back into the cynical world. I mean, it’s an angry, unhappy place and you’ve got to find a way to be happy in it. I mean, there’s going to be bad influences, there’s going to be people who grind your gears, people who just try to pull you down with them, and it’s not easy to go against that society. But I guess it’s something that I deem important.

I: Regardless of what you personally perceive of it, how do you think religion helps in terms of this viewpoint?

L: I feel like it can definitely can go both ways, and it is completely based upon the interpretation or the context that you come into because there’s definitely a lot of controversy around different parts and different aspects of religion. But there are cynics and hateful people on either side, just as there are very kind and very open-minded people on either side. So, I feel…

I: Overall, because for any group, there’s always going to be people that are extremely negative, extremely positive. But as a whole, what is your take on it?

L: I guess to put it concisely, if you are a cynical person, it’s not going to matter if you are a cynical atheist, a cynical Buddhist, or a cynical Christian. You’re still going to be cynical at heart. Now, they may teach you, depending on the religion, they may teach you to be a certain way, they may teach you to act a certain way, and they may teach you to think a certain way. But the thing is it doesn’t mean that you’re going to. You may be able to preach it, but that doesn’t mean that you practice it.

I: So, do you think, for example, if elementary schools started having classes that were something along the lines of teaching positivity, that in the end, it wouldn’t do much good because it would be up to the kids themselves, and not necessarily any outside influences?

L: That seems kind of like abstinent leaning sex education that occurs in middle and high schools. It seems like it would be as successful as that would be, in my humble opinion.

I: Which is that they don’t work?

L: Not at all.

I: Alright, well I think that’s good then. Thank you for your time.

L: Yeah.