#i catch fucking covid
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my birthday’s tomorrow and i’m 90% sure i have covid!! great!! fantastic!! 26 is off to a very smell and taste-less start!!
#i literally have not left my house since before christmas and the one time i do#i catch fucking covid#FOR THE FIFTH TIME SINCE 2020 MIGHT I ADD#miss corona can’t seem to let me go 🥰
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i said i would draw my ocs wearing masks and here they are
#havent drawn monk and mathias in ages LMAO#i actually think sally might like to wear cute colored type masks#i was thinking monk might be more stringent about which mask she wears but i realise that cloth masks are reusable#and she might prefer that. mathias is DEFINITELY the type to be strict about it though#he does NOT want to catch covid from anyone bro.#ok thinking a bit more about it monk probably wears what she can get. shes got the cloth masks#but if theyre in possession of some better masks shes not against it#art#ocs#oh my fucking god 'traffic light trio' is already a tag 😭😭😭😭#was it a tag 5 years ago???#IT WASNT!!!!! I WAS FIRST
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man
#maybe im being pessimistic abt this. im not saying u should wear a mask every waking moment of your life god knows i cant#but also. hell no i dont trust u if anything i distrust u ppl even more after how things played out for the past 3 years#like there are situations where it might be inevitable catching covid. most of my family members are nurses and in constant contact#but there are also a ton of ways to make that risk low as possible like masking and wearing a face shield and having sanitizer#for me its not enough to just say oh we're in a small group and we're all vaccinated#motherfucker your kid is sick from preschool EVERY TIME WE VISIT. of course ill be wearing a mask she gave me covid last year#also no the fuck it isnt seasonal the cases go up because lack of caution makes the virus spread and mutate especially around times when#ppl gather. add that with virus transmission in cold weather and its a matter of different factors increasing the risk of spread#im also tired of ppl not understanding that i wont be their responsibility if i do get sick. maybe they can help me recover#but at the end of the day the risk of death and long term health is all on me. i cant change that#the govt barely gives me accommodations what makes u think theyll do anything for every individual case of long covid or worse#im so tired. im so tired#i dont even know if its possible to want this to be over anymore i just wish we didnt have to deal with this in the first place#ALSO COUGH INTO YOUR SLEEVE SERIOUSLY HOW IS THIS SO HARD TO REMEMBER#oh its just a cold/dry throat its not like i have covid or anything. no!! its basic hygiene!!! how is this so hard to understand!!!!!!!!!!#and no this isnt abt whether people have the means to protect themselves this is me bitching abt my relatives not taking me seriously#vent#my art#myart#doodles#covid 19
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It's all "Kids Need To Be Back In School!!" until city schools are so underfunded that multiple schools have to close for multiple days because there's no air condition and it's still hot out, or in winter there's no heat (while the former governor and centrist darling uses state funds to install a heated driveway at the governor's mansion)
#baltimore#us education#larry hogan#this happened every fucking year before covid and now that kids are back in school it's happening again#it's pretty damn obvious that parents wanted kids back in school not for the kids' mental health#but to get the kids 'out of their hair'#how's that working for you now#(i should be charitable and acknowledge that lower income families couldn't afford childcare and hold down a job#but like. medical bills are expensive if i a kid catches covid or brings it home)
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any other disabled people feel like they're losing their mind trying to get anyone around them to give a flying fuck about protecting others. i had a blood test today and the nurse had a cold and was sniffing and snuffling all over the place, not wearing a mask, not making any effort to turn away, and i'm sitting there just as fucking immunocompromised as i was four years ago when they were all in PPE and i'm wondering what the fuck's going on tbh
#nobody on public transport is masked anymore. NOBODY.#it used to be I'd see a handful even if most people weren't#now... nothing. nobody#and every week another person i know gets covid and somebody else admits they have long covid#everyone is getting sicker and nobody is giving a fuck anymore!!!#my friend fucking died from this!! four years and three weeks ago!!! and it's like it never fucking happened!!!#we've learned fucking NOTHING we've put NO SAFEGUARDS in place#it's bullshit#i don't want to be wearing a mask forever but they won't even ventilate the goddamn GP surgery properly#so that i don't catch every single illness in that waiting room#god#personal#the nurse also deadnamed me and was clearly so mad about testing my hormone levels#so. you know. great appointment all round.
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Like three of my coworkers in the past month have tested positive for covid, every day I see new ppl on my dash mentioning that they’ve caught covid, every day I see and hear from ppl who have come down w something that looks like covid but the test came back negative but also they can only afford to test once bc tests aren’t free anymore and the more accurate tests are also more expensive so there’s no way to know if it was a false negative, and yet nobody masks anymore. hell world hell world
#meg talks#like i feel like im losing my mind. i will admit that ive probably gotten too bold abt going out in public#but at least i never go out without wearing a clean n95#and then i immediately look around and see no one else is wearing one and im like well fuck me i guess.#i refuse to get on an airplane or have anyone come visit me via plane bc fucking every time someone ik gets on a plane#they come back with covid#and i just keep thinking back to the start of the pandemic and the efforts to flatten the curve#and how if we’d just fucking. done it. if the lockdown wasn’t lifted so fast. we could have killed covid#instead we’re going on four years of this. and ppl just act like life is normal again#well it’s not normal for me. catching covid could ruin my body and cost me my job and then what#but nobody cares bc most precautions protect other ppl around us more than they protect ourselves#and nobody gives a shit abt the disabled#nor do they want to think abt the fact that they are one covid infection away from being disabled themselves
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Since doctors are useless after intensive research I'm putting POTS, fibromyalgia, osteoporosis and arthritis on the table and will try to test for them because I'm seriously sick of being sick! This is starting to seriously impact my life negatively...
#can barely drive without severe pain shortly after#the office is hell#facing the screen for hours on end is hell#and on days like today even laying down on my side is hell#I have 4 heat patches on#along with heat gel#all for a temporary relief#I still insist that covid and its fucking vaccine caused this#I was a model of health early 2020#i was bragging about not even catching a cold in YEARS#this suckkkkkkksssssssss#I am complaining a lot#but the amount of discomfort I'm in is driving me slowly but surely insane
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#**mine#covid#covid 19#I'm getting medicated rn and I can't catch my neurologist for a fucking check up it's so annoying#anyways im assuming most ppl will say no ;/
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isolating on my parent’s farm for a week ama
#the past three days have been fucking NUTS#culminating in my car battery dead. 2 of my roommates testing positive for covid. replacing my Own Car Battery. and driving an hour in the#middle of the night to get to my parents house so if I didn’t catch covid i won’t. and if i did then I won’t spread it. also im babysitting#the farm this weekend#anyways. im sexy and ill never die#ask me questions to keep me company this week so i don’t LOSE IT#iinryer talk
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#ashamed and alarmed to discover that much like teachers#people who work closely with folks who spend a lot of time on the streets#and in shelters#or in buildings that offer services to the disadvantaged#will catch every fucking thing that goes around#just like their clients do#which sucks more for them#by like a whole fucking lot#but also sucks for my boyfriend who needs to do his job which is to help them and would rather not have to do that while sick#but we don't have a choice and they don't have a choice and this work MUST be done#so he has to try to do it anyway and hope he can hold up#desr god he is tough#for a soft guy#it also sucks for me because i catch almost all of it too#we have each been sick three times this year#and i know people do deal with and are dealing with way worse so i feel bad being mad about it#not mad at the people or my boyfriend but mad at the whole situation#this is infuriating and between us this year we could have fulfilled the snot needs of the entire nation if there were a shortage#i hope i don't catch whatever this is#and i hope our immune systems are not so ravaged by the covid we had a year ago that we cannot build a more robust immunity to rhinoviruses#ughhh stupid flesh hovels
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couchsurfing via hookup app is a safe and reliable means by which to have a roof over my head
#manifesting#i should purchase a lottery ticket#woof woof#im out of housing end of month and so not looking forward to a shelter#I hate being disabled. I don't have the stamina to fuck enough to get a bed every night.#also don't want to catch covid but fate will do wtv the hell. I'll see if I can get another booster soon
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i keep waking up every three hours which is nice because thats how long youre supposed ti wait between each strepsil. unforties they dont do anything. i am suffering
#ive had my flu and covid jab so idk if this is just a bad cough or a different strain of covid but im so pissed off#i wear a mask whenever i go out but no one i live with cares so i catch everything off of them#what part of im disabled and it all hurts extra bad for me do you not understand#theyre literally gonna kill me. im gonna die and its gonna be my stupid fucking brother's fault. lol
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sighs
#if i died tonight after eating this mcdonalds id probably give a sigh of relief and go peacefully#im so fucking DONE crying for hours upon coming home#from work. well the remaining hours i have anyway considering i cant even cry bc i have to do everything else#cant i just catch covid come on no one in this fucking town is wearing masks JUST GIVE ME SOMETHING???????????#im SICK#my hand has gotten WORSE and out of stress i slept bad and i lost like 40% of my body motion.#cant look up cant look down#not to the left and barely to the right at all im MISERABLE#he barely let me go home without getting on my knees to wipe down the entire place#“cause you're sick so get better yeah you're starting early on monday:)”#MAYUBE IF YOU HADNT WORKED ME LIKE A FUCKING DOG WHILE MY WRIST AND TENDONS ARE IN FUCKING PINCH I WOULDNT BE HERE
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that last post mentioning masks got me thinking about how like... i quite literally cannot wear a mask at all times due to one of my disabilities. i TRY to wear one when i can but it isnt always an option for me, which fucking sucks because im terrified of getting sick and potentially worsening the very disability that prevents me from consistently masking. and hardly anyone masks anymore so its not like theyre helping to keep me or anyone else safe lmfao. to spell it out very plainly i am PRO-MASK so dont put words in my mouth here please.
i experience heat intolerance, as a symptom of some kind of muscle weakness fatigue issue that still hasnt been properly diagnosed. my body temperature runs warm, im overly sensitive to my environment, and physical activity makes it worse. if i overheat, my muscle weakness (and nausea, and brain fog, and-) will flare up and ill be forced to rest for what could range from minutes to hours to days to weeks to months depending on how bad it is. i have to take IMMEDIATE action when i notice myself getting too warm because i cant risk that, and taking immediate action includes removing anything i can thats keeping me warm, including masks.
so when i walk to work in the summer bc i have exactly zero alternate options? most likely cant mask right away when i come in unless the weather is cooler than usual, because i need to take like half an hour for my body temperature to go back to normal.
moving around more than usual during my shift? the physical activity is gonna increase my temperature and ill have to take my mask off.
going somewhere other than work, having to either walk or take the bus? either way i have to spend time in the sun and so again i will probably need a cool down period once i get inside / on the bus, depending on how hot the weather is.
and theres an intersection here of my multiple disabilities and my poverty. i cant drive due to another illness, and i cant afford to use a rideshare service or even regularly take the bus, so walking in the heat is my only option to get to work. my work options are limited because i couldnt complete college and cant perform heavy physical labor, so i have to stick with a retail job that requires a lot of moving throughout the store, which itself is physical labor that can potentially make me sick if i go overboard.
mostly i just wanted to put this out there because i never really see people talk about actual reasons they cant wear masks, its almost always antimaskers who dont give a damn about people like me. but if you take anything from my ranting, let it be these two points:
while most people who dont wear masks are just making that choice because they dont like doing so or dont think its important anymore, a few of us out here literally cannot always mask despite knowing its a risk to ourselves and others; and
IF YOU CAN MASK PLEASE KEEP FUCKING MASKING. covid still exists! disabled people still exist! many of us are extra susceptible to the long term effects of covid! please fucking help to protect us! please give a shit about us! i feel like im shouting into the void here because i hardly see anyone mask anymore but please.
#ok to rb#just a couple weeks ago my roommate got sick with a covid scare and it was fucking terrifying to think i might catch it again#i know most people see covid as something mostly or entirely in the past but it isnt#and some of us are still scared and trying to survive#spoonie#covid#covid cw
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Welp, I can safely say that October and Halloween have been ruined for me. I envy everyone who can actually look forward to the festivities because my heart is just not in it this year :/
#vent#it's been a shitty month and I'm not looking forward to the future#we still have stray cats we need to catch#work is kind of a shitshow and the encroaching holiday rush is not helping#my friend has been in the hospital on a ventilator for days and i still don't know what exactly is wrong with him besides fluid in his lungs#(he's gonna be okay but I'm still worried sick)#the election is looming and I can't even begin to think about the future of our country right now#and just to top it all off i got a jury summons#I'm just waiting to get in a car accident or get covid or get screamed at by a customer#it's been the type of shitty month that makes me wish i could just stop existing for awhile#I've been going between longing for a nice day trip into nature to reset and just straight up wanting to die#and i get that most of this doesn't sound that bad but with my GAD and social anxiety on top of my depression it's all too much#the worst part is this guilt complex that's been eating at me#I'm convinced I'm a bad evil person who should die horribly and it's hard to recover from that when it's constantly playing in my head#I will never ever be good enough and it fucking hurts#it doesn't matter what sort of evidence there is otherwise#somehow someway my brain will convince me that it's fake and that I'm horrible and should kill myself#all i can do these days is play video games and try not to think about anything
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Once again I truly did not expect Asthma to be the defining chronic health condition of my adult life but I really do be getting Every Single Respiratory Infection In Chicago even with Xolair, two inhalers, a nebulizer, mast cell stabilizers, allergy shots, COVID nasal spray, and never leaving the house sans kn95 mask. My lungs suck sooo bad
#I don't get the flu I don't get other illnesses I even avoid COVID surprisingly well#But I will get like combination RSV/pneumonia in July#I didn't catch the cold that Everyone at work had! I literally Only catch respiratory illnesses because of fucking. Asthma#Hospitals keep recruiting me for experimental drug trials I am not kidding
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