#i can't take anymore emotions i am a hollow husk

[fabled-lady-twilla]

"So, how's the Jujutsu Kaisen/My Hero Academia fandoms doing right now?"

DANGER, DANGER! THIS IS NOT A DRILL. I REPEAT, THIS IS NOT A DRILL! ALL HANDS ON DECK! SPOILERS AND MISERY AHEAD!

WE ARE NOT OKAY!

WE ARE 100% ABSOLUTELY NOT OKAY!

IN THE SPAN OF LITERALLY LESS THAN FOUR DAYS, BOTH FANDOM'S BELOVED WHITE-HAIRED FAVORITES, WHICH GEGE & HORIKOSHI HAVE TEASED/HINTED/TORTURED US WITH POTENTIALLY GETTING A HAPPY ENDING, ONLY RIP THAT POSSIBILITY OUT FROM UNDERNEATH US LIKE NOTHING!

THIS IS LITERALLY THE CURRENT STATE OF BOTH FANDOMS:

HOW DO YOU THINK WE FEEL, TF? WE ARE EXPLODING ALL OVER TUMBLR/TWITTER/REDDIT/ETC. ALTERNATING BETWEEN YELLING AT OURSELVES AND EACH OTHER AND DROWNING OUR SORROWS IN COPIUM JUICE. 😭😭😭

[burning-fcols]

"Fuck you asshole! I opened up to you! I trusted you! You knew how much that shit would hurt me but you went and did it anyway! Go to double hell!" husk @ angeI for break up verse -  ✩   「 @helluvaxhazbin 」   ✩  

「 ☆ 」 Every. Damn. Time... Every time Angel thinks they're getting somewhat close to a reconciliation— even if they can't risk going back to how they used to be, they can still not want to rip each other's throats out —it ends up like this. Screaming their lungs out, spewing vile at one another. Lies and truths intermingled so intensely it's difficult to figure out which is which. Hatred and love and anguish an uncontrollable fire burning within his gut, threatening to incinerate him like all the stories of Hell insisted would happen. Frankly, he'd rather that than this.

Angel knows he messed up. He handled things horribly between them... had hurt Husk in a clumsy effort to keep him SAFE. Yet he can't entirely regret his decision. Only how it had happened. He was nothing but bad news for the feline... A pretty bit of poison that was going to get Husk killed in he continued to indulge. Angel never has been one to openly feel sorry for himself. Always submitted to someone else's will, pulled along like a puppet, he's careful never to show how much the strings dig into his skin. How every faux choice makes him feel less and less alive... But this time, having played the unknown martyr instead of the self-preserving asshole—

Is it really so bad for him to want Husk to accept WHY he did it?

No. Husk can't know. Who knows what the idiotic feline might suggest if he was aware Val was the reason Angel didn't want to be with him anymore. He's too loyal. Too hard-headed. He might not see the situation as clearly as the spider does. Better he thinks Angel came to the conclusion on his own... and merely regrets how it had tumbled out of him. Even if that makes apologies ring hollow even to Angel's ears.

❝ SHUT UP! JUST SHUT TH' FUCK UP!! ❞ Voice breaks, throat aching from more than being overworked in the studio. Fists clenched in front of him, claws dig into shaky palms. Entire form trembling, tears pool in his eyes, feeling hot as his boiling blood as they drip down a reddened face, ❝ I said I was sorry! How many times do I have ta keep sayin' it 'til ya get it through yer thick skull?! I hurt you! I KNOW I hurt you! An' I fuckin' HATE myself for it, alright?! An' if I could do it again, I would'a handled things diff'rent! But I CAN'T! I can't fix th' shitty thing I've done! ❞

Raising his gaze, desperation still overwhelms the glossy hues despite the indignant fire alongside it, ❝ I get why ya hate me, I DO. But I also can't fuckin' stand it... I-I can't... I can't keep doin' this. ❞ Voice loses it's edge the longer he speaks, clenched fists reluctantly falling to his sides. Tense posture loosening in defeat, wide eyes take in Husk as if actually watching him die. But at least Husk is only leaving his life instead of— ... It still hurts. More than anything that's happened so far.

❝ It hurts too much... Ev'rytime I'm around you, I— I feel like I'm dyin' all ova' again. There's esctasy an'— an' escape... an' it's ev'rythin' I eva' wanted. But then reality sinks in. An' I rememba' where I am an' WHO I am an' all the fucked up shit I did an' that you fuckin' hate me an'— an' it's not an escape at all. I don' WANT this. I don' want ta feel this way. ❞ I didn't want to DIE. ❝ An' I know you don' eitha'. ❞ That's why one of them has to stop this. ONE of them has to get clean, before they both overdose on whatever twisted relationship they've gotten hooked on now.

❝ I love ya, Husk. ❞ He mutters without looking at the other man, sweet words bitter on his tongue. Wiping at his eyes with an arm, it does nothing to stop the barrage of tears, ❝ An' I didn' go through all this shit ta keep ya safe, only ta make yer life a Double Hell... ❞ Emotions clouding his judgement and forcing his words, Angel doesn't notice his slip of the tongue. ❝ So, fine. I'll fuck off an' leave ya alone... Fer good now. ❞ No more hate-fucking. No more forgetting in the moment. No more playing pretend in the softness of the afterglow. No more clinging to the rare moments when things are unexpectedly soft the entire way through...

No more hopes lifted when things are soft even WITHOUT sex, only for them to come crashing back down when reality shows itself again. 「 ☆ 」

[goodolddumbbanana]

When the light is gone.

What if after Sun revives, he was no longer the same. Like Soulless Sam from Supernatural, he will be a husk. Like he still cares about his family, but his feelings no longer be there, only purely pretend as the results of his old self.

(Sun doesn't feel love, or hate or guilt with anyone, towards anyone. His emotions become empty and hollow, because, he doesn't mind if Moon or Nexus does anything.)

Strangely, he becomes more happy, more like his old self, because now, he just realizes nothing in his control and... He just doesn't mind or suffer from his emotions.

Just like with Nexus, but because Sun only lost his emotions and not his brain, he doesn't go through Nexus cringe emo villain rebel tennage phase.

He is just the same good old Sun, with a little... Different.

I think it would be sweet angsty if Moon and maybe Nexus try to make up to Sun, try to beg for Sun forgiveness but Sun no longer needs their apologies.

He just doesn't care.

Of course Sun still appreciates it. Sun likes having brothers, and he hates being lonely, and even though his feelings become so shallow, it doesn't take Sun's care for his family out of him.

I think it would be justified and funny if this time, everyone suffers except Sun. My boy is having a great time, when he doesn't have mental breakdown from anxious or the traumatic events anymore.

Heck, even right now if Puppet wants him to do or choose whatever choice they like to, he would gladly do that for her/him.

And of course he couldn't understand why everyone around him felt sad when seeing him like that.

While Earth cries whenever she talks to him, or Lunar looks at him with nervous and sad eyes, like he couldn't stand seeing another man wearing his brother's face, but still there are some relief in his voice because Lunar knows he feels more happy that way. Moon and Nexus got it worse.

Moon - MF just got back from death, and I bet Sun's death is related directly or indirectly to him or Nexus. To see his brother, telling him how awful he was with a smile on his face, and whatever love in Sun eyes was no longer there. His brother sees him and treats him just like a stranger, a parent he has to deal with in kindergarten.

I don't know if it would be worse or hilarious, if suddenly, Moon now has to be the one who has the moral compass.

Like, he has to chase Sun around, repeatedly yelling at Sun:

"No Sun, you can't yell at the kid because it touches your barrels. "

Or

"No Sun. We can't use Lunar's power to lure Creator. I know he can handle it himself, but it is still your brother!!"

And...

"No, Sun. Do not hang out with Dark Sun just because you think he has a lot of cool stuff and he is a version of you. He is evil!!!"

"And get away from Nexus!!! I don't care if that little shit used to be me. The moment he killed you, he was just another villain we have to deal with!"

And of course some of the angst moments...

"I am sorry, I am sorry Sun... It's all my fault..."

Again. Sun wonders when is the time Moon get tired of it.

Same old routine now, Moon hugged Sun tremblingly in his breakdown, his fingers, in a desperate attempt, almost scratching Sun's metal shell. Moon's voice sounded like he was about to cry, and if it was the Sun in the past, he would feel extremely guilty and loved and try to comfort Moon.

Now, Sun just felt bored with a little uncomfortable because he had to maintain the same position, with his hand clumsily patting Moon's hat while his mind was wandering. It's not that Sun doesn't appreciate Moon's worry and concern for Sun, but it's starting to get too much out of time and it's giving Sun no time to clean up.

"There there, Moon." Sun tries to think how he used to comfort and empathy with the other. "Do you want to watch a movie? Or playing a game? I need to clean the daycare right now... And I can't stay here with you like that ..."

And don't think I forget about Nexus and Dark Sun.

Due to the situation, if Sun after revives meet Nexus and Dark Sun first or Moon have mental breakdown again and hit Sun and feeling too shamed to crawl back to apologise to Sun right now which leads to Sun is being alone when the two duo meets him.

Nexus neither feels extremely guilty about what he has done and snaps out of his phase when he sees Sun become just like this, just like him.

Or happy to see Sun still want him and no longer be limited by his moral.

(Like he likes Dark Sun, but Nexus is not an idiot. He knows Dark Sun has some hidden plans for him. Only Sun, only his brother is always loyal to him, and now he is back, and now he wants to choose him, to choose Nexus instead of that creature Moon. ) .Yeah, I love Sun and Nexus relationship so much, more than with the Old Moon. Suit me.

But... Still. Slowly but surely, Nexus will have his guilt eat him alive. Seeing how Sun becomes so not... Sun while still being him, maybe will make Nexus feel sick at the stomach.

(he feels so wrong... Seeing Sun like that. Sun is supposed to be angry at him, to disappoint at him. Not looking at him like that, like He doesn't do anything wrong or worse, like Sun doesn't care if he doesn't do anything wrong.)

And Dark Sun is just like having a buddy to play games with. (He sees everything so hilarious he goes full supportive at Sun with a glass of wine in his hand...)

I have a feeling that when Sun is killed and revived he won't recover quickly, he'd be more like Lunar but maybe even worse where instead of getting up and running around he's just quiet, broken, and doesn't speak with anyone, but that's my take either way I think he'll take it worse than the others who've died

100% true.

I mean same, dear anon. I think that Sun won't recover too quickly.

And I think that it might be for the better.. I mean that it'd give Moon a chance to finally be the better brother.. to finally try for Sun..

I mean that if Moon will take care of Sun in such a state it'll show that he cares.. no more leaving Sun in the house alone.. he'll be just there for Sun.. really showing that he cares..

I just really want to see Moon trying to be better for Sun.. showing that he cares.. not only saying that he cares but showing it..

But to say it shortly, I agree with you, dear anon.