#i can see the river from it. and it's far enough out that i dont see too many people

[orcelito]

I'm In The Woods Again

Im gonna end up making a post like this every time I go to sit in the woods. Which is kind of a lot.

[landos-meat-rider]

1999, part four - final part!

oh my gosh. final part and what a surprise, she's a long one again💀💀ive loved writing this silly little series so so much and i love all of you very very much🫶🏽🫶🏽🫶🏽please give me requests on what to write next bc my mind is completely blank rn, all i can think of is the cold war and bolsheviks from my history revison and i dont think they would make v good fics🤡🤡

lmk what you think of this part and your fav moments, enjoy!!

warnings: tiny angst, mostly fluff, swearing

conrad fisher masterlist

masterlist

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conrad’s pov

Since Y/n is unable to hold a phone herself, I'm tasked with a lot, but I didn't fully realize the worry of her family until she had me working through each task with her.

No wonder she’s overwhelmed. The number of texts from Laurel, Mom, Belly, Jere and Steven she has to sift through in a given hour would drive anyone insane.

Or maybe I'm just going crazy by sitting this close to her. The smell of her coconut soap is permanently ingrained into my memory as she sits flush against me, pointing at different texts with her uninjured hand.

I can tell her nerves grow stronger as the Uber near the hospital.

Her knees bounce up and down as she dictates message after message I need to send, confusing me more and more with every word.

The work doesn't stop there. After we check in, a nurse hands us a clipboard filled with pages of information that need to be filled out. Y/n stares at it like it might catch on fire at any moment.

"Here." I pass it to her.

Her eyes shift toward the exit. "Will you help me please? I can't write like this." Her voice drops to a barely audible whisper.

"Okay. Tell me your answers and I'll write them down."

Her throat bobs as she scans the first line. It takes her far longer than necessary to read the first question.

"Do you mind reading the questions aloud for me? I'm too stressed to concentrate right now." Her overcompensating smile irritates me.

"Are you sure? Some of the questions are probably personal."

Don't be a dick. Just do what she says.

"I don't care.”

The rigid way she sits in her chair says the complete opposite.

She seems to be one minute away from breaking down, so I concede. I sigh as I grab the pen and get started on the first question. The paperwork doesn't take us as long as I anticipated, so Y/n and I sit together in silence. She stares at the exit longingly.

The way her eyes dart around the room as she gnaws on her bottom lip makes me feel merciful enough to save her from the anxiety eating her up inside.

“If it's any consolation, I hate hospitals too."

Her head swings toward the direction of my voice.

"Yeah?"

I nod. "Haven't been to one since…"

"I know." she says as she sees my chest heaves as I remember the millions of times we’ve been here before.

I keep my eyes focused on the soundless television playing in one corner.

Her good hand clasps onto mine and gives it a squeeze. I'm grateful she understands me enough not to ask any other questions. The idea of offering another raw part of myself feels like a betrayal of the years I've spent carefully developing a certain kind of persona.

"I hate them too." Her voice cracks.

"Why?"

She stares down at her swollen hand. “My dad…” She pauses, and I give her hand a reassuring squeeze like she gave me. "Let's just say mom ended up in the ER a couple of times for being clumsy."

I take a deep breath to stave off the anger bubbling beneath the surface. "And did you have issues with being clumsy?" If she says yes, I swear to God two men will end up floating in the Chicago River tonight.

She shakes her head rather aggressively. "No. No." My rapid heart rate can be heard through my ears. "If you were, you can tell me." While I can't promise I won't do anything about it, I can promise to make him hurt. A lot. With sulfuric acid or something, those pre-med studies are starting to come in handy now.

The overwhelming sense of protectiveness hits me hard, and I don't shy away from it. There is nothing I hate more than men who use their fists against innocent women and children.

"It never got to that point. Suze made sure of it." she says with a small smile.

"How?"

"She caught onto the signs and interfered before things got bad. Used her savings from my grandpa's life insurance policy to help Mom get a divorce and start a new life." A tear slips down her face, and I can't stand the sight of it.

I brush it away with the pad of my thumb, but the damp trail still lingers. A driving force inside of me wants to erase the sad look on her face. "Did her plan also happen to include a jug of sulfuric acid?"

She forces out a laugh. "I think concrete shoes were more in style back then."

I fake shudder. "Remind me to never make mom angry again."

"Forget her, you'd have to deal with me." She holds up her injured hand like a war trophy.

"I'm absolutely terrified."

"Miss Y/n?" a nurse calls out.

Y/n doesn't move at the sound of her name.

"That's you." I place my hand on her thigh and give it a squeeze.

She sucks in a deep breath as she stares down at my hand.

Her chair nearly tumbles behind her as she bolts out of the seat, throwing her one good hand up in the air. "I'm here!"

The nurse leads us through the emergency room bay.

Individual beds line the wall, each area divided by a paper curtain.

The empty bed meant for Y/n is unacceptable. Between the person retching behind one partition and the individual on the other side hacking up their lung, I refuse to let her be seen here.

"I'd like my…my friend, to be taken care of in a private suite," I speak up. I know I sound snotty right now but honestly, I’ll be damned if I let her already horrible hospital experience get any worse.

The nurse grimaces as her gaze licks across my body. "This is a hospital. Not the Ritz. Take a seat and wait for the doctor like everyone else."

Y/n hops on the bed without any complaint, and I'm tempted to grab her and go elsewhere. The nurse doesn't seem the least bit bothered by all the noise happening around us as she checks Y/n’s vitals and asks some routine questions.

Y/n answers each one while chewing her bottom lip raw. This atmosphere couldn't put anyone at ease, least of all her.

The nurse hangs the clipboard at the foot of the bed, and I decide to try again.

"I'll pay whatever it takes to have her seen somewhere quieter. Money is no object."

The nurse only replies by shutting the paper curtain in my face.

Y/n laughs while I stare at the curtain, dumbfounded to be treated like this.

"You find this funny?"

She nods, her eyes alight for the first time all night. "Did you see her face when you said money is no object? I think if she didn't put the clipboard away, she would have slapped your face with it."

"It's not my fault she isn't accustomed to how things are done in the real world."

"Wake up baby. You're living in the real world." She waves around our room.

"It's terrifying." I say, looking away so she couldn’t see the blush that appeared on my face at the nickname.

"Come here. I'II make it better." Y/n pats the bed.

Doubtful, but I'm a glutton for giving her what she wants lately. Paper crinkles as I sit next to her. I take up most of the bed, giving her little room to get away from me. My thigh brushes against hers. She tries to scoot away, but there isn't enough space.

“Isn’t this cozy?" she quips.

I give her a small smile before she asks, “Hey! Let me see your tattoo.”

God I’d forgotten all about them. I move the collar of my shirt to show the two small ivy leaves we’d gotten. She gasps and gently touches my skin, “Oh my gosh it’s so pretty Connie.” she stares at it for a moment before I ask to see hers.

She lifts up her shirt on the side, exposing her ribcage and the two matching leaves.

“I can’t believe you agreed to get a Taylor Swift referenced tattoo with me Con.” she says as I admire the tattoo for a bit.

I smile until saying, “Hey I might be quiet and mopey but at least I have good taste in music.”

She softly smiles at me before eyeing the IV bag with horror before checking out the exit.

"What’s wrong?”

She leans closer to me and whispers, "Is now a bad time to admit I pass out whenever someone tries to stick a needle in me?"

My lips lift at the corners. I don't know why I find the idea hilarious, given her ability to watch eight consecutive hours of true crime documentaries without so much as flinching.

"You're afraid of needles?"

She sputters. "No. I'm not afraid. It just happens to be a bodily reaction I can't control."

“That's good then because the nurse needs to set you up with that IV when she comes back."

“No! Don't tell me that! I thought she was one of the good ones.”

I nod, pressing my lips together to prevent myself from laughing.

"She lied to me!" She bolts from the seat and would have tripped over her own heels if I didn't reach out and catch her.

*Careful." I place her back on the bed and decide to stand guard in case she gets any ideas to flee the scene.

Her eyes fit from me to the gap between two curtains, as if she is thinking how she can get past me.

"I'm joking.”

She scans my face for the truth before she slaps my shoulder with her good hand. "Asshole! I believed you!"

Laughter explodes out of me like a bomb, stunning her.

“Did you just laugh?”

"No."

“Yes." Someone calls out from the other side of the curtain.

“Now, do you mind shutting up? Some of us are trying to get some sleep over here after having our stomach pumped."

Fuck this place and the people in here. "We're leaving."

"Not so fast. You can't leave before I check you out." The doctor strolls in and points at the bed with his clipboard.

Y/n remains tight-lipped as the doctor checks her chart. He asks her some questions about how she got hurt, all while staring me up and down like I'm the person she was trying to injure. She is taken away for a few scans, and my breathing doesn't return to normal until the nurse brings her back.

That should be my first sign that things are getting out of hand on my end. I'm inching closer to an emotional minefield without any kind of map, only one wrong step away from exploding.

The doctor checks the scans. "It looks like you have a boxer's fracture."

Her face brightens. "That sounds badass."

I glare at her. "Calm down, Muhammad Ali. I wouldn't count today as a victory by any means."

The doctor's eyes lighten. "Next time, avoid any initial contact on the fourth and fifth knuckles."

"Please don't encourage her."

The doctor shakes his head with a laugh before giving Y/n a detailed set of instructions regarding the healing time. I'm skeptical about the whole visit and, given the setting, doubtful about the level of care. I'll be damned if Y/n sustains permanent injuries because of Dean. My chest tightens at the idea.

“Great Thanks, Doc!" She hops off the bed, but I hold my arm out, stopping her

"I’d like a second opinion." The command bursts out of me without any rhyme or reason. Deep down, I know a boxer's fracture isn't the worst thing that could have happened. But things aren't right in my head where Y/n is concerned. At least not anymore.

Both of the doctor's eyebrows arch. "For a small fracture?"

"Don't mind him. He tends to be a bit overbearing." She shoots me a look as if I'm the crazy one out of the two of us.

"Okay..." the doctor says.

Maybe I am losing it because why else would I care?

You hate it when she cries.

You wouldn't mind murdering someone who hurt her.

You took her to the hospital even though you despise them with every fibre of your being.

The signs all point to one thing: our situation is quickly crumbling, and I'm the only one to blame.

Y/n interrupts my thoughts. "I'll be sure to wear the brace for a few weeks and avoid any kind of activities that could aggravate the injury."

"Perfect. And don't forget to schedule a follow-up visit with your physician. "The doctor gives me one last look before handing Y/n the discharge paperwork. "Nice meeting you."

"Will you help me with this?" She holds out the clipboard with her left hand as the doctor leaves.

I grab it from her and fill it out.

She checks the time on her phone. "Well, at least that didn't take as long as I thought it would. I'm sure you're dying to get back home."

That's the scary thing. I didn't think about anything or anyone once during our entire time here because making sure she was taken care of was my only concern. I've spent the past seventeen years of my life thinking solely about my future, and all it took was one girl to make me completely forget about my responsibilities for a few hours.

As if that doesn't scare me enough, it only takes one glance at her makeshift brace to make my blood burn hot under my skin. I know exactly why her injury angers me more than anything else.

It's the same reason I feel the urge to push Jere away from her whenever he gets too close or the way I unexplainably need to see her whenever she is out of my sight for longer than a few hours.

You’re in love with her.

Fuck.

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y/n’s pov

We’re in an Uber on the way home, sitting in comfortable silence until Conrad breaks it.

“Why’d you get with Dean anyway?” My stomach doubles over.

Comfortable silence is so overrated.

I sigh. I’ve been dreading this question for ages now.

“I don’t know.” I answer vaguely.

Conrad gives me a puzzled look, “What do you mean you don't know? You must’ve had a reason.”

His restlessness gets me more agitated.

“I don’t know Conrad. I don’t know why I got with him, I don’t know why I was waiting on you for so long either.” I look out the window as the car stops in front of the house.

“What? What do you mean?” he says as I get out the car and speed up to the front door, taking the keys out of my pocket and refusing to carry on with this conversation anymore.

Conrad keeps yelling after me as he follows me upstairs to my room, both of us trying to ignore everyone else who joined Conrad and are trying to ask their own questions.

I slam my door shut and collapse on my bed hearing Conrad trying to calm everyone down and telling them everything that's happened until he asks them all to give me some space for now.

I cry in the silence as I hear everyone leaving from outside the door until it opens.

“Hey.”

Steven. Thank God.

“Steve…” I say sniffling.

He looks at me with a sad smile before sitting on the bed with me and taking me in his arms.

“Con told us everything,” he says after a few minutes of holding me, “did you really get a boxer's fracture?”

I laugh in tears before showing him my hand and saying, “You should see the other guy.”

Steven and I laugh together before going back to the silence as he hugs me.

“He really cares about you, you know.”

“No he doesn’t. He hates me. I yelled at him and now I’m crying here on my bed like an idiot.”

“Did he say anything to you?” Steven looks down at me.

I shake my head before saying, “He asked why I got with Dean.”

“Oh. That’s not too bad.”

“No it’s not.”

“Then why are you so upset?”

“Because I’ve been waiting for Conrad for so long and I’m just sick and tired of always being there to help him get over his breakups when he’d be so much better off with me. I know I sound selfish and none of my reasons are justified but I just thought that after everything we’ve been through together, he’d maybe like me just a little bit.”

Steven hugs me again and softly says, “He does.”

After that almost everyone but Conrad came in to check up on me and make sure I was okay, making me feel even more guilty about being all emotional like this. It’s not until Susannah’s holding me and whispering sweet nothings that my eyes start to feel heavy.

I think I fell asleep after that, I don’t remember much except waking up to the sun shining its very unwelcome face in my eyes.

I step out of my room after freshening up and I’m about to make my way to the kitchen for food until I’m stopped by something in the hallway.

Or should I say someone.

“Conrad,” I bend down and stroke his hair out of his face, “Conrad wake up.” I say gently.

He stirs for a minute before sitting up and taking my hands in his.

“Have you been out here all night?” I ask.

“Yes.” he says in a raspy voice.

God that voice would make my knees give out if I wasn’t already on the floor with him.

“Why?”

“I need to talk to you.”

I sigh before he interrupts me, “Listen, I heard everything you said to Steven last night and I know I shouldn’t have and I was eavesdropping but I’m sorry it was by accident. And I know I don’t deserve any more of your time…I’ve already wasted a lot of it but just hear me out for ten minutes.”

“No.” I try to get out of his grasp.

“Stop fighting and give me ten minutes.”

“No way.”

“Nine then.”

“Five.”

“Eight and a half.”

“Six.”

“Seven.”

I pause, knowing that he won’t let me go anywhere before I hear him out.

“You don’t deserve seven seconds, let alone seven minutes of my time.”

“How about seven words then?”

I laugh. “I’d like to see you try.”

“I am falling in love with you.”

I blink up at him. Either I am still sleeping or I must have not heard him correctly because there is no way Conrad Fisher just admitted that he is falling in love with me.

Absolutely no fucking way.

Right?

I squeeze my eyes shut as if that can erase the words from my memory.

"You're joking.

"I'm not."

"This is just another part of your game." I try to push him away, but he doesn't budge.

"It stopped being a game for me a long time ago."

"You're lying."

His brows pull together. "Ask me why I hate when people touch my bookshelf."

"Are you serious right now? What does that have to do with any of this?" I think back to his bookshelf he won’t let any of the others go near but loves to let me organise and re-organise each year.

"Because I did it for you."

"I'm sorry, what?"

"I read somewhere online that organising objects like books and things is good for people with anxiety, because then they can feel in control of something and know exactly what to expect especially if things are the same as they've predicted all the time. You love reading too, so I changed it. Bought all the books you like to read so that you’d stay and read with me more often. I forced everyone else out of my room and especially away from that bookshelf. All because I wanted to help you."

Emotions clog my throat, preventing my ability to reply.

What can I possibly say that could compare to that?

Conrad doesn't give me an option as he continues. "Want to know why I kept this plant you got me?" he says pointing to the small green cactus with “Don’t be a prick” written on the pot that we could see looking into his room from the hallway.

I nod.

"Because it was the first time someone got me a present that made me laugh."

If hearts could melt into puddles, mine would be liquified right about now.

I take a deep breath.

Remember what he did.

“Con that doesn't change anything you still ignored me for a whole year. Every time I tried to call you or text you, you’d just leave me on read or decline, and now you’re telling me you love me? Who does that?"

"Someone who doesn't understand the first thing about loving someone, but is willing to try if you give me a chance."

"You want me to give you a chance after everything? Do you think I'm stupid?"

He winces, and a bit of my anger fades away at his vulnerability.

"Intelligence has nothing to do with this."

"Easy for you to say when you're not the one who feels like a fool."

"Really? Because based on your reaction today, I'm feeling pretty damn foolish for ever admitting that I'm falling in love with you." He gets up off the floor, leaving me feeling chilled to the bone.

"Con..." I reach out, but he takes a step back.

My eyes sting from his rejection. It hurts.

“I’m not asking you to love me back. I don't expect that and I'm not sure if I ever will because I'm the furthest thing for lovable. I'm selfish, and rude, and don't know the first thing about being in a proper relationship with someone. But that doesn't mean I’m not willing to try for you if you let me."

How am I supposed to be angry at him when he thinks he is unlovable?

A pain rips through my chest at the thought of him talking about himself this way.

I get up off the floor and walk straight into his chest. His arms quickly wrap themselves around my waist, holding me even tighter.

"Just because you make selfish choices doesn't mean you're a selfish person. At least not completely."

This boy had been there for Belly, Steven, me and Jere for years without any kind of payback, especially when Susannah was going through her cancer and despite feeling an immense amount of pain himself, he shoved all his emotions aside so that he could be there for us. For me. If that isn't a selfless sacrifice, I don't know what is.

"Your logic is half-baked at best."

"So is yours, seeing as you called yourself unlovable."

His body tenses. "I'm stating facts."

"I don't know what bullshit your father told you over the years, but it's not true. Your brother loves you."

"He’s obligated to."

"No one is obligated to love someone else. Blood or not."

He takes a deep breath. "You're right."

I smile up at him. "I could get used to hearing those words."

He reaches up and cups my cheek. "Give me a chance and I'll tell you them every single day."

I sigh and look away. "I don't know.”

"Tell me what's stopping you."

"You don't do relationships."

“Good thing our feelings lead us here rather than our minds, and mine are willing to try then."

I avoid his penetrating gaze. "What if my feelings are telling me to run?”

“It's cute you think you can outrun me, but I'll give you a head start just to make things interesting." he smiles down at me.

"Do you always have an answer for everything?"

"Not for the one that matters most." The way he looks at me stirs up something deep inside of me.

Longing. I want to give him a chance, regardless of the potential fallout.

You might get hurt.

I might, but I might miss out on something special because I’m too afraid of the what ifs. I'm done being that person. Even if it means getting hurt, I'd rather try and fail than never try at all.

I stand on the tips of my toes and press my lips against his.

He holds me tight against his chest, as if he is afraid of letting me go.

I pull away, only to clasp onto his chin. "This could be a disaster, but I'm willing to try."

He shuts me up by pushing his lips against mine, sealing our new deal. The way he kisses me is different than any time before. He cups my face with the palms of his hands as his lips mold against mine, teasing me until I feel dizzy. His thumb brushes across my cheek back and forth, and heat rushes down my spine straight to my belly. He makes me feel cherished. Protected.

Loved in a way that makes me never want to come back down to reality.

I could spend forever being kissed like this and still feel like it isn't enough. While Conrad might not be the best with words, his kiss says it all.

He is falling in love with me. And I’m falling in love with him. No translation necessary.

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ahh i cant believe its finished omg😔💔...

anyways, onto the next one😍🙏

again please lmk what you think of this and please give me requests on what to do next!!

[theosconfessions]

if youd like to read the stephens from the beginning you can over here :)

if youd like to read the stephens continued you can over here:)

@ohsosims

theo- yeah we moved pretty fast

scarlett- for someone who didnt want to settle down you did. but he was worthy of that right?

theo- [smirks] you know im not fan of you being passive aggressive as fuck right now. why dont you skip all this shit and ask me what you want to ask me.

scarlett- okay if dustin was the type youd settle down for. whyd you cheat on him twice? i mean the second time you full on left us. him everything you built. the first time well you just couldnt control your dick.

theo- turn the cameras off.

scarlett- sure

theo- im being serious turn the cameras off. im not putting this out there for everyone but if you have questions. fair enough. turn them off.

scarlett- cut the live, blake. say what you need to. but my phones still recording .for dad.

theo- dad knows everything im about to say to you.

scarlett- so say it again.

theo- thank you. so the first time was just stupid and im paying for that with my health. you want answers to why i left you guys and although dustin and i have been good for awhile. i never apologized to you, robin or river. that was my oversight. i could it here and give excuses but there are none. the problemw ith these types of shows, scarlett. especially with guys like me who are completely full of themselves..these shows feed into that. a house full of people who want to fuck me? as a young guy? are you kidding me? i mean, scar do you really think that it was just marlee and lillie i was involved with before dustin? i thought everyone wanted me and i acted as such. so all that aside, i turn 50. im married, i have a five year old you at home to take care of since marlees head is so far up jamis ass by then. BUT the problem is im still thinking like that. like everyone wants me. how could i say no i thought. it had nothing to do with your dad.dustin wanting kids. it had everything to dowith me. im a shitty person. no excuses. i left. and then i woke up. and then sex with strangers wasnt hitting like it did before. woke up alone strung out. still had to go to work . still had to see your father everyday knowing what i did to him. the worst thing ive ever done was hurt that man. it wasnt a quick forgive for him. i was on my knees literally some days. and he rightfully told me to fuck off. he had you guys to look out for.

scarlett- how did you get dad to forgive you? i barely remember you moving back in. you were just there.

theo- wasnt easy . like at all. and i didnt deserve his forgiveness. it took time a lot of it. i had to prove that he could trust me again. we started right back at the beginning. less sex this time though.

scarlett-youre gross

theo- some things dont change

scarlett- do you think dad trusts you now?

theo- if he doesnt? he has every right not to. but id hope in the ten years that weve patched things up that he does. id like to think he does.

scarlett- i still dont

theo- understandable. i dont think river or robin really trust me either. but im grateful youre giving me a chance scarlett. that youre even speaking to me. even if this thing started off as a witchhunt. and your dads probably going to kill me when i get home.

scarlett-[sighs] blake, start the live.

theo- whats this?

scarlett- just wrapping up. do you have any regrets in doing the bachelor?

theo- i regret how i treated the people on it.

scarlett- advice for people going into it?

theo- mm dont think with your dick.

scarlett- charming.

theo- im a charming guy.

scarlett- and where does the future take you,theo?

[hanzhen0506]

~’Enough Saying Sorry!’~

Hello! Its Zhan! Im back with another Youngjae fic, (I am loyal to Hanjin okay, its just- Youngjae in this comeback is something else istg) Thank you and enjoy reading! Muahhh

The music stop and everybody collapse on the ground from tiredly dancing. “I think thats enough for now.” Shinyu announce, getting up. “Teokkbeokki for dinner!” Kyungmin cheered as the others join. “Wait for a moment, I havent contacted y/n” Youngjae inform and they all groan.

“The lovebirds really cant seperate huh?” Jihoon teased with Dohoon.

“Just leave him be, we can wait for a few minutes. We also need to consider how she’s doing after what happen” Shinyu said. Youngjae thanked him and hurriedly grab his phone that was silent for 3 hours. These days lately was a pretty tough week. He and you officially revealed your relationship towards his fans and although the majority happily accept you both. There was still some anti’s who sends mean and hateful comments, going as far as invading both of your privacy too. So he turned on his phone only to see your multiple miss calls and texts, even including your friend’s miss calls and texts

“Jae-ie, can we meet now?”

“Jae-ie, what are you doing right now?”

“I really need you right now.”

“I just had a shitty day and one of the worst nightmares please answer me.”

“I need your help.”

“Youngjae, where are you?”

“Hey Youngjae! Its y/n’s friend, ____. I just wanna check is she with you? She hasnt been answering me and all so Im a little worried. If she’s with you right now then thats great. Sorry for interrupting you again and please contact as soon as you can 🙏.” He freak out seeing your friend’s text.

“Y/n’s missing, I have to go find her!” He said, packing his bag while the members freak out. Dohoon stop him from moving. “Woah, what do you mean she’s missing? And do you even know where you’re going? We should report the police about this!”

“Listen, I dont have time and im worried for her. Report it to the police for me, I need to start searching for her.” He said pushing Dohoon away and leaving the Hybe building. He took the taxi to your apartment that was luckily near. Arriving, he open the door with the spare key and tried to look around for you in the place. “Y/n?” He shouted looking around. Once he open the bedroom his anxiety heighten. There is not a single soul in the house and there were no clues whatsoever of your whereabouts. He opened his phone and called everybody you knew, colleagues, friends, families and yet none of them about where you are at all. He notices something shining when the sun was setting on your desk. He took a closer and it was the promise ring he gave you for your one year anniversary with your phone by the side. Under it was a letter, for him.

“Dear Youngjae,

Whatever you do, please, dont find me. I notice how clingy I have towards you and hope that you dont find me annoying. I have been rethinking that maybe I should leave you alone for a while. Your comeback is coming closer right? You should focus on that right now. Im at my comfort place, so you dont need to worry about me. -Y/n”

He thank the gods for finding the letter and bring you ring. Running towards the Han River bridge before the sun sets, his body is aching and screaming to stop running and use a taxi, but he doesn’t care and wants to see you no matter what. He kept running and running until he can finally see you again in the middle of the bridge. You always find the bridge interesting due to the beautiful sight and lights surrounding it, how long it is, the cold temperature that you would use as an excuse to hug him and of course the suicidal cases. He just wishes you wont do it too.

In the far distance, he teared up at the sight. You were sitting on the railing of the bridge, a habit you often do that sometimes scare him. But your face looked so peaceful, looking at the sunset. He carefully walk towards you and hug you tighlty from behind. “Jae-ie?” You gasp as he placed his face on your shoulder. “You scared me..” He sniffles, making you look back. “Im sorry.” You said gently and he just tightens in response. “I-I thought I was gonna lose you, you dont know how much you worried me.”

“Im sorry.. There was this fan, who was following me and kept asking me questions. I had to hide but they now know where I live and all so I panic. They finally went home, but I still felt unsafe, so I went here to clear things off my mind. Im sorry-“

“Enough saying sorry!” He shouted. “I should be the one to say sorry to you. I was too busy with practice that I ignored your messages. I wasnt there to stop the fans and comfort you, and it took me a while to find your whereabouts even though I should have known. Its my fault for leaving you alone..”

You shook your head, carefully turning around while Youngjae holds your hips. “I know you wont do that purposefully, and I appreciate. But we must admit that it was also my fault for leaving and not contacting anybody, Im sorry.” You said holding his face as he tears up again. He pulled you closer and hugged. “I forgive you, I will always forgive you. Im so sorry.” He sobbed on your shoulder as you too, cried as it is the first time you ever see him cry. You caressed his hair as you hold onto him tightly. Finally the sun sets, revealing the moon and the lights surrounding the bridge turns on.

“Ill make sure to talk to the company about the fan.” Youngjae said and you nod. “Lets go home,” he said. Carrying you princess style towards a nearby bench outside of the bridge. Ordering a taxi for you both.

Arriving to the TWS dorms, all the members circled around you looking worried. You reassured them that everything is fine, although they were hesitant they all left the both of you alone, making sure to keep an extra portion of the teokkbeokki for you. Inside his bathroom, he pampered you with a bath, massage, skin care and of course kisses and cuddles. Youngjae makes sure that the fan will get a warning by talking to the company as he doesnt want to see you in that state again. He pulled you close in the bed, spooning you and hum your favorite songs, helping you drift asleep and he joins you after.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

(Please do not steal my works!)

[sasoxichomoshi]

Ashlesh analysis

Since im the only person in the face of this world that is deranged enough about Nilah to go beyond the mortal realm seeking for answers, i felt i had the responsibility to write this post with as much info as i could

frequently i feel like people dont know how to address or read ashlesh since 1) he's subortinated to nilah (as if he was an accessory, and not an entirely different entity, but i understand why this overlap happens) and 2) it's not like we have a lot of info on him to begin with

or that's i think people like to believe; i mean, yes he has less lore that directly mentions him than fiddlesticks, but i believe that with a bit of reading we can infer a lot from ashlesh, and that's why im here writing this post

1. DUALITY

first i would like to point out something interesting that (so far) just happened with ashlesh: the fact that he has two different titles

for me, it speaks about ashlesh complexity as a character - he resonates in duality, joy under his influence can mean multiple things, his waters cut deep but they also veil against harm, he gives power but takes the soul

i feel like (at some point) ashlesh was closer to humanity (meaning that he helped humans thrive at the same time he fed on them, yk like cattle) than to his siblings - The Ten Kings - and that's why he was granted two titles, he seems to go beyond the "just consume" that we see from fiddle, yes he fed on humans but he understand how to do this

the devil is smarter

this of course is a past that we'll probably never know about ashlesh; if it was once written, the river of fate has likely washed it away long ago

2. AMBITIONS

despite mysterious, ashlesh seems to have a clear and audacious goal: fight the heavens

it's transparent like water that ashlesh harbours resentment towards the celestial realm above and it has a good reason: it was the celestials that trapped him

here's the story

For those who dont know, the new fiddlesticks and zoe got a small connection in lore - in one of the old splasharts, fiddle carries a key, but upon receiving his rework, it was not there anymore

so people started noticing that the key that once belonged to fiddle was now in the hands of a mischievous little (and too powerful) girl

(this lore event is also present in fiddle's biography)

but after all, what this key was for?

Carnivalnites (or Jared Rosen), the main writer behind fiddle rework, rell, viego and nilah, answered it in an old tweet (now deleted) what the key was for

note 1: "beautiful and terrible in its joy", the duality concept strikes again

note 2: by the way it's put and by the way jared talks about the "something else" (that we now know it's ashlesh), it seems that at early stages the demon of joy was meant to be a lesser demon that was under fiddle sphere of influence (this concept is confirmed by the demonology annotation image from noxus that came out with fiddle rework) but with nilah release they have since moved from this concept cause now ashlesh is one of the ten kings alongside fiddlesticks

with all this information we can confirm that ashlesh is deeply tied with targon, or more specific to the celestial realm beyond

celestial beings trapped ashlesh for some unknown reason, possibly the demon was posing some kind of direct threat to them so he had to be locked

...

my personal theory is that ashlesh got kicked from the celestial realm, tried to build up his own "kingdom" below on runeterra, but also got denied this option and the celestials locked him away as a final punishment

"She read of the mad king Viego and his tragic fall, the genesis of the first dragons, and the foundation of the universe in the Kathkan tradition."

how is this possible? cause ashlesh himself is a star that once resided on the celestial realm and upon coming to the world below, he turned into the demon we know

Ashlesha (or Āśleṣā) is the 9th nakshatra (constellation) of the Hindu astrology; it's symbol is the sea serpent and its element is water. The head of the snake (in Hydra constellation) corresponds to the star Āshleshā.

interestingly, fiddlesticks bio also mentions this strange and otherworldly nature

An evil gone from the world for numberless centuries—long enough that the warnings of a nascent humanity passed into rumor, then myth, then legend… until all that remained were simple fables. An entity so utterly alien that it defies almost all contemporary knowledge of magic.

note 3: about the "turning into a demon" part, fiddle's bio is full of "it got turned into" imageries, of men and animals transforming with demonic power, so i dare say that is not impossible for ashlesh turning into a demon;

last, but not least, to make this even joyful (and funnier) i present you all the Star Guardian Version of the story (Jared worked on Another Sky novel for SG 2022 event too, so the thematics overlap)

ashlesh the STAR of joy

remember how fiddlesticks and zoe were (also) related in Another Sky? yup yup

(i feel somehow that zoe also was the key to free ashlesh in this AU too)

with these i finish my thoughts, thank you for those who read it !

[barbatoskisser]

Hello humans! Quick warning - I spam sometimes and I just reblog ang type wtv. Consider this q blog full of whatever catches my eye. May contain smut but I try to keep this as sfw & friendly as possible <3

Pronouns here for those who want to compliment but dunno how <3 (i love you all, i need to update it, but its pretty accurate for now!)

Commissioms OPEN 0/5 link here for info

PSA - not terribly active due to irl reasons!! Dw, ill explain everything once I have a chance. But yeah, I'm mostly on discord because thats where a lot of my friends congregate. May still reblog occassionally. Asks are always open, just might take a min for me to respond !

Name

Adin River Barbatos

Age

19...somehow? I don't know either.

Pronouns

He/Its but if it/its just feels awkward to you, they/them is fine (in moderation). Primarily I use he/him though.

Rules / Guidelines

Very much basically just don't be an asshole to me or my mutuals and to protected groups. I support palestine and ukraine, gay and trans, and I'm far from neurotypical. I'm white too, but nyeh. Overall I dont support racism, zionism, homophobia, transphobia, and abelism. Be nice. Not as enforced but if your a minor and think "oh hey neat! A sfw adult blog!" Thats cool but dont be surprosed if I randomly rb a venti smut or spicy venti, lyney, xingqiu, or aether fanart. I fullhearted consider all above as adults and now willing to debate it. If you don't think so, just block me. If genshin ever says directly "[character] is under 18 years of age." And its one of the few, then no shit I'll get rid of this but otherwise it stays up. Eitherway, yeah, no promises i wont reblog spicy occassionally. Be warned and dont interact with that stuff unless ur a legal adult. Also, preferrably, keep drama to a minimum. If a mutual of mine, or someone ypu may think of as a mutual of mine, does something problematic send me a dm and be respectful about it. I'll investigate and if I find it absolutely appalling I'll no longer be friends with them. But just know 9 times out of 10, I really dont care about what my friends post about (see: "problematic" fics. I DON'T CARE. If it doesnt involve in real life humans, i do not give less of a shit.) Unless its in real life that someone did sonething illegal then I'll give a shit. Otherwise, yeah, i'll side with my friends. No offense.

Friends

@definesanity , @archaicanathema , @gunterdon , @unkownknowledge , @pale-value , just to name a few. They're all great [chefs kiss]. I'm always open to gaining more mutuals, but preferably be 16 or older. I don't understand gen alpha or anyone under 16. They confuse me. Henceforth; please be over that age otherwise I'll feel like I'm talking to a toddler. And i doubt you wsnt to be treated like a toddler. Anyone born past the 2010s atp is a toddler to me. I'm a 2005s kid.

Species

Am catboy future vtuber / streamer with secret human. Hint, a friend of mine. Also, if you ask my friend gunter, he'll say eldritch creature. So, honestly, who knows ~ ehe.

Fandoms/Interests

Hunter x Hunter, Genshin Impact, Ouran High School Host Club, Lunasmr audios, That Time I Got Reincarnated As A Slime...If its popular enough, I've probably watched it. I used to play Honkai Star Rail, but I've since fallen out of it. Kuma Kuma Kuma Bear, some others. Essentially, quite a number of modern isekai. Up to Overhaul arc of my hero academia with no plans on finishing, all of Hunter x Hunter, all of Dragom Ball Z, up to the universe tournament arc in Super, All of Slime in the anime adaptation. Though i do have webnovel spoilers. By the grace of the gods (pleasw someone yell at me about it. I beg you), Lowkey getting into Monkey Kid lego edition

Okay as I'm rewriting this I've watched a lot, and I mean a lot of shit. So ask me about a show if its not on here. The only ones I can say I haven't watched are demon slayer, attack on titan, naruto, and one piece. Maybe one day, but certainly not today. Currently about to start a few new series. On youtube I'm starting to watch Grian and Kaboodle. Damn their fun. I dont know if its on here, too lazy to check, but also pLEASE ALSO YELL TO ME ABOUT IRUMA KUN. I LOVE IRUMA KUN SM. I NEED MORE IRUMA KUN MOOTS.

Favorite character(s)

Killua Zoldyck, Gon Freecss, Venti / Barbatos, Goku, Illumi Zoldyck, Ryoma Takebayoshi, Alluka and Nanika Zoldyck, Kurapika Kurta, Izuku Midoriya, Shouto Todoroki, Rimuru Tempest / Satoru Mikami, Milim, Veldora Tempest, Paimon, Xiao, Gorou, Lyney, Lynette, Arlechhino, Furina, Zhongli / Rex Lapis, Focalors, Karma Akabane, Korosensei, Nagisa Shiota, the rezt are kinda forgettable. Mavuika, Nahida, Mualani, Kachina, and more to come. I love so many different characters its not even funny.

Other Things

Congrats if you've read down this much! Here would be a secret code for a silly but the co-conspirator said no. You'll have to wait!

[nikethestatue]

I’m seeing everyone talk about plot holes and inconsistencies in HOFAS. I read the book very quickly in another language and so I don’t really remember these. What are some plot holes in HOFAS?

One thing that’s been bugging me is, probably the only hole I caught, is the concept of limbs growing back for the Vanir, but this doesn’t happen in TOG or ACOTAR. Now that we know the Fae of Midgard are exactly the Fae of ACOTAR, and the Shifters are exactly the Fae of TOG, and it doesn’t seem like any type of evolution has occurred to change the Midgard Fae at all, im confused how regeneration is a thing. I suppose it’s never directly been mentioned in TOG. But Lucien is missing an eye. That faerie in book 1 ACOTAR had his wings ripped out by Amarantha and died from it. We know angels can regrow theirs. I know Cassian and Azriel have their wings shredded and healed at different points, but to me that seemed more like skin regrowing after being damaged rather than whole limbs regrowing. Idk, these things dont bug me severely but it is noticeable…

Just off he top of my head:

Amren who arrived during the time of the asteri/daglan can offer almost no info on them

She was in Prison during Fionn's/Theia's time, but regardless, she supposedly was there in the beginning and she can't provide any insight to anyone

Bryce arrives and conveniently, they just KNOW that she is gonna go exactly where the slithering beasts are...right

When someone drops from the sky or whatever and tells you that your whole world might be re-invaded and you have a history with these immensely powerful creatures who want to come back to your planet, asking 'may i look into your head' is just fucking dumb. It doesn't make you the King of Consent. It makes you the Lord of Dumbness. Why even have this daemati power if you never use it, even to save your people and your world potentially, because you are so...honourable? Come on. That's just ridiculously stupid. And oh-so convenient.

15 thousand years is a long time, but the amount of history that the Fae lose in that time is kind of dramatic. They conveniently remember nothing about their beginnings or anything that's connected to their past. But it doesnt make sense that they would forget because they live thousands of years. That time span could be only 4-6 generations. So their 15k is equivalent to our 200 years. We DEFINITELY know what happened 200 years ago. Like between Rhys and his dad alone, it's 1,500 life span. If grandpa High Lord lives for 2K years before, and another great-grandpa for another 2-3K years, we are REAL close to 15K. But no one remembers shit.

They dont even remember who built Velaris.

So for 15K years, NO ONE, not one person bothered to go on a walkabout in Hewn City, to check out all these walls with all these stories on them. It took Bryce to drop in and just miraculously look at a wall and see the entire history of prythian just like that.

Apparently, Azriel forgot how to winnow. So they needed some very elaborate way of crossing some river. Because he couldnt just transport them across it...

According to SJM 15,000 years is close enough to have an unbelievable resemblance between Ruhn and Rhys so much so that they look like twins, all because they shared some ancient ancestor. But apparently it's far enough for Rhys to know nothing about this ancestor, even though he is her direct descendant.

You have Rhys, whose blood is 'programmed' into the Prison and its wards, you have AMren who spent TWO THOUSAND years in Prison, you have Lanthys, a death god who heard the Harp and its note singing, you have the Bone Carver who imprisoned himself willingly in Prison--and yet NOT ONE OF THEM sensed the presence of an Asteri sleeping in a glass coffin beneath their feet.

Yet Super Bryce found the sleeping Asteri in 2 days. And managed to kill her too.

I can go on and on, but I think you get the point.

Prythians look like backward dopes and maybe they are, but I don't think they are supposed to be? Like the MOST POWERFUL HIGH LORD IN HISTORY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! was taken by some girl in pink sneakers. Not to mention her stealing Azriel's prized unique dagger just like that.

[exiledelle]

(this might end up being a long post, sorry about that)

been seeing some posts (mainly on twitter but i dont like to post there) about creating new fangames for the other human souls in undertale, inspired by undertale yellow, and im all for it.

honestly for years ive even thought about trying my hand at something like it, but unfortunately ive never been able to hold motivation long enough to actually learn how, so i dont have the skills to do anything. BUT, i DO have a rough concept:

going to put this after a cut though so people who dont want to read can just move on

OKAY SO. the big town in ruins. thats obviously something. its probably going to be explored by one of the other soul fangames eventually anyway, heck, ts!underswap already goes into it, but in fairness ts!underswap is a whole au, so its technically not the same. but theres a specific thought im having in mind regarding it:

so the cyan souls stuff, the ribbon and toy knife, is found in the ruins. of course this doesnt exactly mean thats as far as they got, maybe they simply left them behind, replaced them with something else, or they were given as a gift for someone who for some reason decided not to hold onto them anymore. but what if it WAS the furthest they got, or at least where they spent most of their time??

also obviously im not suggesting a hilariously short fangame that barely gets into anything. what i am thinking of though, is a story that twists and turns back and forth through the same area. you start in the ruins, and stay in the ruins for the majority of the game, maybe the humans content to just stay with toriel and wait instead of trying to leave and reach asgore immediately. but maybe theres something going on in the alleys of the ruined town that pushes them to explore it, discover sub-areas, possibly entirely new regions that connect to the ruins but are dead ends instead of leading into the greater underground. and the game just ends up with this one kid having a whole metroidvania mystery adventure or something, all still in the same style as undertale.

i dont have any ideas for mechanics, characters, what the story would even be, or what all the different areas could end up being, the most i can picture is maybe something to do with the scarlet tree toriel has, recontextualizing that into something, maybe you get to explore a part of ut yellows dark ruins that clover never sees, or maybe an area inspired by this unused track from undertale yellow thats either a not-underwater coral reef (think something like coral highlands from monster hunter world or that one area i forget the name of from tiny tinas wonderlands), or a region built over a massive lake, maybe its where waterfalls rivers end up (although thatd probably work way better if the story actually led further out from ruins, possibly a final area to parallel hotlands/core)

not sure. again, i dont have the skills to try making this myself, would love if i could and absolutely would try though, would be fun trying to flesh something out. as it stands right now though, thats about all ive got :p just thought itd be fun to try and toss this into the wind, even if nothing ever happens from it

[wsdanon]

hii ^_^ did you know that to sail up wind you have to be at a 45 degree angle to directly upwind. anything closer is called being in irons and you will not be able to leverage the wind to move forward. to move across this space is called tacking, and the boom (the metal pole that holds the sail at a 90 degree angle to the mast) will swing across the boat and the crew will have to jump to the other side of the boat so the crew doesn't add to the weight of the wind on the sail, capsizing the boat. this isnt so much a worry on larger sailing vessels, but on something like a racing dinghy (anywhere from 14 to 18 ft) if you dont move to the windward side fast enough, you will definitely flip the boat. Tacking is relatively safe, and the boom doesn't move far when you cross the wind, as it's held in place by the main sheet, the rope that attaches to the boom and controls the amount of slack on the sail. jibing, on the other hand, is a maneuver where you cross the wind while heading downwind. This can be rather tricky in a small boat that is easily capsized. When heading downwind, the sail will be at at almost a 90 degree angle to the rest of the boat, hanging out over the water. When you cross the wind while heading downwind, the boom will violently swing across the boat and over to hang out above the water on the other side.

Very brief lesson on tacking and jibing if you do not know about it already ^_^ hopefully this is worth anything.

on the other hand, im super interested abt what you have cooking for yamwbfv. Whats in store for tazercraft and fit at the base they're checking out? where do they go after?

hi \o/ i didn't actually know much about sailing this is very interesting! if i decide on a yamwbfv ending where they sail out of there (aka mike's current plan) i'm coming back to this ask lol. i think the most i've done with boats is rowboat on a river which is much less complicated

for your question (and i'll put it under a cut because it contains slight/vague spoilers):

at the base isn't too much. mostly just need to tick off some things (getting fresh water, cleaning up a bit, some conversations) the content of the conversation i want to happen here will be me trying to expand on fit's character more. i want to expand on things that are a bit more specific to him outside of just the queerness. there are a few things i have in mind to touch on but only one of them will be coming up in this next chapter--which i've already started now \o/

that being said, i judge chapter length based on approximate word count + whether the ideas i wanted to address are finished. if i feel like the word count is under what i'm aiming for i'll add something else (this hasn't really happened yet but i keep it in mind) so maybe more stuff will come up at the end of the chapter i'll have to see how i'm feeling

i don't mind mentioning this because it was kind of in the list that happened in chapter three but next thing to check off is going mining + setting up their new base. not sure whether it'll happen in this chapter coming up or the next but there will be some talk of fit and pac's prosthetics. on a wider scale: mike is still kind of emotionally regaining strength after everything that happened in the last chapter so he'll be taking a bit of a backseat for the moment. he'll still be doing stuff, just not taking centre stage as much

i have a lot of ideas both my own and from prompts that i'm working through (which is good because this is supposed to be a slowburn lol) so i won't go into all of them here but i hope this little bit interests you \o/

[rogdona]

drop the oc lore 👀

Youre my first ask hiiiiii 👋👋👋

(I TRIED TO MAKE IT SHORT I SWEARR but it got kinda long so ill put it under a read more so i dont clog ur dashh)

idk which oc you want to know more ab so ill choose elias, ullula and rogdona(the one my blog is named after!!) Since theyre the ones w a set story thats kept p consistent w time.

-

so basically ullula is a goddess who elias' family worshipped. They were p active in her church and very devout

they town they lived in was kinda isolated, near the forest and the river

ullula, taking the form of a surubi (idk the english word 😔) visits elias when he was a kid and ventured to the river, he recognized her as the goddess, they talked, he kept visiting

eventually they got closer, ullula had thought it was a good idea to interact with her followers but didnt expect eli to become so attached (yknow that one text.. something something divinity will stain your fingers like a pomegranate, spit you out dark red and wanting, greedy human fingers grasping at what u can reach)

She decides to test him, see how far hes willing to go because maybe they can go back to being friends instead of him becoming a blind follower whod rather listen to her than reason... But twas too late ��� eli failed the test (something something perhaps abraham failed the test. God never speaks to abraham again)

Ullula doesnt appear before him again, thinking it best not to involve herself anymore and keeping her distance. Elias, distraught, keeps seeking her out, waiting for her by the river, making himself more present at church in hopes of fixing what she saw broken, etc

Years pass, ullula still missing. He takes over the church after the last leaders passing, having worked there for many years starting some time after ullulas disappearence

He puts his everything into the church, every event planned meticulously, every sermon spoken with reverence unmatched, but it was not enough to bring ullula back

Years keep passing and hes getting desperate, everything is done the way its supposed to so why isnt she coming??

He gets to the conclusion that maybe its because time feels different for them both, after all, for a god thats lived since forever a few decades might be nothing at all, right?

He starts feeling like hes running out of time, despite having a good part of his life that hes yet to live so he seeks out a creature of the forest to strike a deal with

Those who know say its unwise to venture into the deep of the forest, especially alone, but he keeps going and bumps into rogdona who finds amusement in his wild eyes and lack of composure, and decides to help him out.

Both of them want more time, and elias can get it, of course! but it doesnt come from nowhere, he has to take it from someone. So they strike a deal, rogdona will lead him to lost people in the forest and elias will take their time for both to share

But thats terrible! Ullula would never approve of him taking a life...but. but. But! If they were lost in the forest and going to die anyways, surely she'll understand? After all, death by his knife will be far kinder that whatever fate awaits them should a creature find them, they love playing with their food

So there it goes, now that he has all the time in the world he keeps taking care of the church w a little extra help in the form of a sphinx-like creature

[aidontdraw]

I gotta rewatch Naruto... Because I'm not sure how their government works. I'm kinda settling on, it doesn't.

The Ninja Villages seem to be their own city states. Whos main export is their military power. Simple enough.

These City States have to report to their countries Daimyo. Which each country has its own political leadership, it all seems to be the same type. A Feudal System with various Lords owning Lands. Each doing land lord stuff with it. Cool, no problem.

These City States can negotiate with other City States in their own behalf at Gokage Summons. There are limitations, because they need to get approval from their Daimyo to do war stuff. Or else Daddy D stops paying the bills. All simple shit.

The City States also get military funding from their own country based on, what appears to be contract work. Because we know Suna didnt get paid for the Fourth Ninja War, because their Daimyo said, "Sorry, thats ninja business." So not a steady source of income.

(Except the Cloud does seem to get a steady stream of money, because they grew during the disarmament. So I guess it's based on how nice your sugar daddy is.)

However they are not limited to only working with one Daimyo. They can, and Konoha has, work with other countries political leaders. With out any problems from their own country's political leader. Which is why Konoha Crush happened, because Konoha was undercutting Suna pieces to the Wind Daimyo during a time of disarmament(tight purse strings).

They can also work with Feudal Lords, both their country and others. We see Narutos group working for the Snow, Nomads, and others. They can also work with people of the merchant class of again their own countries and other countries. It's how we got to meet Haku and Zabuza.

City Stares can and do own land in countries not their own. And can and has gifted it to other City States. Like when Konoha gifted Suna fertile farming land in the River Country. And for some reason they just planted flowers, go off king.

So these Villages do not have to be loyal to their own country. Whcih fair enough.

But now lets think of war. Each of the wars we know are called Ninja Wars. Whcih does signify that there has to be normal war going on. Especially since we know some Daimyos dont pay for Ninja Wars. With all these diffrent Feudal Lords thoes bitches gotta be fighting for land... And hiring ninja to do so. Do the villages just consider that contract work and not really a war because its not happening to them? Maybe?

But they treat mercenaries like they are different things. They call the Akatsuki mercenaries, because they are an independent group getting contracts from everywhere... Including Ninja Villages!

And I just feel like they need to restructure their government, because its like, who do you even work for? And why are you working for them, if you can kick their ass. You have magic nukes and they don't. And your begging them for money?

Then there's Samurai, which are said to be more poweful than ninja, but lets be real... No they aren't. But they do seem to occupy a similar social status as Ninja. So like where do they come into play?

Also, do we ever get into the fact that there's non-human races in Naruto? Like fuck the aliens... I wanna know about the cat people.

Also summons have their own hierarchies and land whats up with them? Like I forget if their lands are on the same earth or if they are on a different plane of existence. I think its the same earth super far away, because in the Pain fight they are like normal travel would take days/weeks... Idk

[sleepkey]

having my mom need so much support and disability is so stressful to be around and has made existing harder than it usually is

told my dad i struggle on a good day

i keep having mental breaks

my only breaks are when i dissociate while playing games or listen to asmr falling asleep but even then i get smacked with reality constantly

its hard enough taking care of myself i am not built for this and the guilt is only making it harder

my mom has done so much for me and i cant do anything for her

i feel useless on top of it like i havent been eating but asking my dad to get me food isnt an option because he is constantly helping my mom... hes in his 70s and most of the work goes to him i dont want him to wear himself ragged because ill actually lose it if anything happens to him

i keep fantasizing about going down to the river to stare into the water and my paranoia says thats dangerous like im gonna do something dumb but realistically i just need out of the house

problem is as with doing literally anything i frankly dont have the energy

i can barely eat sleep or do anything more than the ABSOLUTE bare minimum

my will to live is being sucked out of me more and more by the day

i need out of here but anywhere else is too expensive and im poor

grateful i work from home so like i can mask it all to earn enough money to survive cuz if i still worked in store id be missing work

im just so lost and everything is a haze i can barely function

where can i turn is there a light at the end of the tunnel? is the rest of my life doomed to look like this until she passes away? i dont want to wish for her death but i see no other salvation...

wish someone would come save me but help is so far away (literally most of my friends are long distance and anybody nearby cant do anything of impact)

my dad is the only one i can find hope in but he has so much on his plate and at his age putting more on him makes me feel terrible

maybe im going around in circles but thats about how my brain has been lately. best i can do is survive and do what im told in ways that make the most minimal issues possible

id rather starve myself than be another burden

[wc-wild-rewrite]

Forest of Secrets reread! Honestly, i really like this one! Specifics will be at the end in the My Thoughts section but overall, 9/10

Too much weird abelistic pity though

Prolouge

Again, stretching the "bracken-colored" defintion here

Shoutout to Graypool for taking them in and keeping quiet for so long, must've been hard

Rip mosskit though

Chapter 1

3 days after the chapter 30 windclan fight

Its the gathering again, still leafbare

Atleast these two arent bickering again

Ah, exposition of the last book, we meet again

Windclan has lost an elder, wonder which one

Wow two expositions in one scene

Theres that very 2009 ... again

Oh, ive learnt it was actually 2003

Chapter 2

Again, very storyteller explanation from Ravenpaw, though it comes off far more intentional this time

Im glad Ravenpaw's doing alright

Deadfoot!!! My guy!! Love him

Chapter 3

Oh fuck sake not Spottedleaf again

This prophecy better make sense bc i do not remember water having anything to damn well do with this book

Chapter 4

Aww, bracken standing up for his mentor. He shouldnt, considering the training neglect, but its the thought that counts

I dont think im physically disabled enough to dictate the use of 'crippled' but :/

Yellowfang!!

Fireheart i dont think you get the right to feel bad about her injury when shes perfectly fine with her new path, can we have less pity please

"For Cinderpaw, crippled" again. Can we not.

See now Fireheart sees where Grey's coming from

Mistyfoot's aware of them, interesting

"Isnt she great" yeah, she is, i agree with you greystripe

Mistyfoot is shockingly calm about this. I can picture her as butch if she was anthro.

Chapter 5

Oh god, more exposition

Brackenpaw is not ginger, why is he described as ginger and not bracken colored!

Oh no they did the same for thornpaw

But that does mean they must be 6 moons by now

"For thunderclan, anyway" lmao

Polite to bring prey when meeting another clan, or elders specifically?

Chapter 6

Oo, badass grandma

Bluestar getting awfully defensive there

I like the 'thistles and thorns' as a swear

Chapter 7

Haha brokentail's being bullied by kits, serves the bastard right

Even darkstripe finds it funny

Ok damn why is fireheart so mad about this

For once i agree with darkstripe, kits werent doing anything wrong

Oof the kittypet explanation is like explaining hes adopted

"A helpless cat like blind brokentail" thats still a kit-murdering dictator, my guy

"Anxious that cloudkit may have hurt the injured cinderpaw" ok jesus fucking christ shes nearly a grown cat a kitten isnt gonna hurt her can we stop the coddling

Chapter 8

They know the term rubbish

Aww, cloud being a little teacher to ash and fern, thats cute. Cloudtail med cat au sounds interesting

Hm, brackenpaw catching a bird that nearly flew away with a jump. Foreshadowing?

Taking ol' tyranny grandpa out for a walk, eh darkstripe?

Chapter 9

I like dappletail, shes so nice

Is tigerclaw already meeting up with bloodclan? Or the remainders of brokenstar's rogues?

Princess my beloved your so enthusiastic

Chapter 10

Completely unnecessary chapter cut, but ok

Goldenflower is expecting, and already decently along, seemingly

Chapter 11

Uh oh, flooded river

I gotta admit, tigerclaw's a good deputy when hes not being evil

Greystripe has river-based trauma

Chapter 12

Crookedstar is not as soft of a leader as i thought he was

I dont like leopardfur or blackclaw

Loving graypool tho

Yeah its breaking the code but technically the code says about not letting kits die and starvation is a cause of death so theres arguments to be made their still within code

Chapter 13

I like this clan mingling, its nice

Stonefur seems like a cool guy, i like him

Oh greystripe

Chapter 14

Oh cloudkit, your tracking skills are impressive but you gotta keep that mouth shut, buddy

Chapter 15

Longtail swaggered towards him

I really like the arc 1 elders, their so fun

I like that we get to see tigerclaw being nice for a minute, even though hes definitely conspiring

Chapter 16

Almost been another moon

Tigerclaw's either really good at acting or he didnt actually expect it to break, maybe he realised fireheart's death would look too suspicious?

Chapter 17

Longtail saves the day

God i love yellowfang and her adopted kits

Wow, even tigerclaw approves of her being the medicine cat

Chapter 18

Time for the gathering, 3 days have passed

Chapter 19

I dont like Nightstar

Good job, Brackenpaw!

Chapter 20

Deadfoot nooo

Yay, morningflower!

Dont drag fireheart into this

Ok, yeah, bluestar kin reveal, but can we focus on Yellowfang saying "adopted clan?" Thats adorable

Chapter 21

Hell yeah, Brackenfur! I love him so much

Oh, poor greystripe, silverstream's death scene hurts to read

And cinderpaw! Poor girl did her best

I like how tigerclaw is just utterly shocked, he didnt see this coming

Chapter 22

Ah, goldenflower had her kits! Welcome, bramble and tawny

Speckletail shut up, wheres mistlekit?

Good to see Goldenflower's had a change of heart

Aww cinderpaw noo

Interesting that tigerclaw respects medicine cats so much

God i love yellowfang so much

Ah, theres the kin reveal

Chapter 23

God, bluestar's explanation is chilling, i can feel her suffering

Oh, great, sandstorm's back to hating them

Chapter 24

Two days since silverstream's death

Ah, willowpelt's expecting. And theres that ol' whitestorm discourse

In cloud's defense, has anyone actually told him the code?

I think Cloudpaw has been adopted by the elders

Chapter 25

Princess!!! And cloudpaw's growing on me, i think i like him

Chapter 26

Always love more cinderpelt and yellowfang content

Half moon ceremony, yay

Cinderpaw gave a joyful wiggle!!!

I love cinderpaw so much, but someone get this girl in therapy

Fireheart can we stop the pity when shes clearly very happy

Ah, heres tigerclaw's big traitor moment

Chapter 27

Brokenstar you coniving mangy bastard

Yeah, go Thornpaw!

Tigerstar giving his evil monologue there, love that for him

Chapter 28

Pin the bastard!

Oh no, bluestar, you good?

And whats this! Riverclan with a steel chair!

Au where tigerclaw just fuckin bleeds out while being pinned

Darkstripe and Longtail stay, smart move, you two

Ok, good, dustpelt's not a complete asshole, then

Chapter 29

Au where brokentail joins thunderclan

Also yikes his death was dark

Im pretty sure thats not how yewberries kill, though

How do you scratch your tounge?

Spottedleaf really said do not be afraid, ok biblically accurate angel cat

"Oh spottedleaf" wheres that "we're really in it now' meme

Chapter 30

Whitestorm being great as always

I like the crowfood being used as an omen

Aww, goldenflower considering them as her own

Ough, poor fireheart (and greystripe)

My thoughts

9/10, definitely much better than the second one. Too much abelistic pity, though, so a point removed. I don't have any complaints for this book aside from that, really. Spottedleaf was mildly less prevelant this time, which is good. Tigerclaw's evil reveal and exit were cool, and silverstream's death hurt me way more than i thought it would. Overall, good.

[nyphren]

witness "theory" from a noob

ive been playing destiny for two months only so i dont think im knowledgeable enough to come up real theories but ive got some ideas and decided to write them down just to see what everyone thinks.

so take this less as a real theory and more as an "wouldnt that be neat?" kind of thing. i have no links to lore entries, no sources from when x character said y, etc. this is all from reading lore theories since i started playing in march.

also i bet someone already came up with something similar at some point.

the theory is: the witness isn't the first knife. it is the amalgamation of people who lost the flower game so far.

for this theory to work im operating under these assumptions:

the vex are the winners of the flower game.

the river of souls is some sort of dimension/plane that "contains" the souls/memories of literally everyone who already died and also connects everyone living (see strand).

the first knife was "created" to maintain the winnower's vision.

the first knife's purpose

so why isnt the witness the first knife? to me, it's simple: the first knife was created the instant the gardener tried to influence the flower game and, more importantly, it was created with the intent of stopping them from doing so. the first knife's purpose was to keep the game as it was before this new set of rules (aka paracausality) because that is what the winnower wanted. therefore, the first knife does not want to erase all life in the universe/flower game, nor does it want to stop anyone from dying. it was wants to go back to the status quo.

the witness does not want that (as far as i can tell). from its reveal at the end of witch queen:

you promised them life… but deliver only death. as you have for so many before. enough. enough death. enough life.

the witness wants to... stop everything, i guess. i see it more as trying to break free from the flower game than trying to restore the vanilla flower game.

if we agree that the vex are the winners of the flower game, it would be in the best interest of the first knife to have them take over the universe. but the witness does not want that. actually, the witness spares no thought for the vex and focuses only on the traveler. more than that, it seems to almost resent the traveler too. why?

the river of souls

as we learn in lightfall, the river of souls connects all things. we can't control it, we kind of just vibe within it. orisis says that all minds are connected in this web of consciousness - we can tap into this web to use strand. the qugu, an ancient race exterminated by the hive, could use the darkness to commune with their ancestors; i think we can assume they used the river of souls for that. so: souls of the dead can be found within the river of souls. it is a place (thing? plane?) where both the living and the departed can exist.

which includes the souls of the many civilizations who were killed by the hive or simply died out for other reasons. if the universe was still just the flower game in the garden, these people would be the flowers who perished, the ones taken over by the vex. they lost. that could make them angry, no?

mara says of the witness "beneath all else, that being cradles rage enough to burn the stars themselves to cinders." at the altar of reflection, two of savathun's lines are about the witness once being mortal and its people being blessed - in one line by the light, in the other by the shadow. but in both this people found power and knowledge, they were not content with it, and the same power and knowledge turned greed and despair. this people, then, changed forever.

i believe one of these lines is true - the one about the witness' people being blessed by light. i believe they flourished under the traveler's protection, and at some point they found out about the winnower and the gardener and how the universe is still kind of game for these forces (even if they arent actually beings, just forces - the garden does not need to be literal here). and then this civilization lost. maybe learning about the flower game gave them an existential crisis, maybe it made them resent the traveler for using them (in a way). we have little to no knowledge of how the traveler behaved before it started to flee the witness and abandon its chosen. maybe it always left after a while. who knows. but this civilization lost, it was furious and it absolutely hated the flower game.

then they went into the river of souls and in some way, somehow, "escaped" from it, if it was a prison at all, and became the witness. and they - now it - was furious. as mara said, it had rage enough to burn the stars to cinders. and it blamed the traveler, while also pitying it in a way.

at the end of lightfall it says:

the universe makes us all victim… and perpetrator… of its infinite cruelty. you, more than any, suffer both fates. be free.

which i translate as:

the flower game is fucking ridiculous. you, the traveler, kept trying to play it with new rules without a care for the peoples who STILL died, new shape in the horizon or not. but you also gave life and saw it die so you also suffered by playing this game. im freeing you from it.

imo, the witness is called the witness because it, well, witnessed the flower game in action. it is a witness for the dead. maybe it is an amalgamation of many civilizations who lost, not only one. it watched as the flower game happened for reals and saw all the suffering and all the deaths it created

also the witness seems to be emerging from water in its first appearance which probably just for the cool factor but it is neat

the final shape is not the final shape

the winnower's final shape is not the witness' final shape. the winnower wanted to keep the vex as the winners because they were the one true final shape since the beginning (or before the beginning i guess). they had no love for the vex, mind; their purpose was to cull the garden, to observe the flowers grow and die until the final shape emerged.

the witness does not want or care about that at all (imo). the final shape for the witness is not playing the flower game. it is, in a way, nothingness.

the winnower's final shape = the original final shape from before the gardener's silliness, which we assume is the vex. the flower game as it should be.

the witness' final shape = no death, no life. no flower game at all.

the traveler is a terraformer

light = physical, dark = metaphysical, right?

the darkness is all about emotion, memory, dreams and nightmares. the traveler/light deals in tangible stuff. plants. a nice atmosphere. good soil. and... ghosts, which are completely sentient beings with emotions, fears and wants. which seems more like a darkness thing but it could be explained away as "life", kind of.

but! maybe they are from the darkness in some way. maybe they are from the river of souls as well and that's why the witness can speak through our ghost. they are one and the same. i mean, ghosts follow the traveler's will but they don't truly know WHY or WHAT the traveler wants. see hive ghosts. or our ghost having existential crisis about the traveler every other expansion.

also, they are called GHOSTS. maybe they are really ghosts, as in, souls from people who already died. who knows.

and yes i will talk about final fantasy xiv

so, ffxiv is my main game. its last expansion, endwalker, also concluded a ten year saga. said saga was also about darkness vs light. no, i'm not saying one copied the other (witch queen - aka where the witness was revealed - was released like 3 months after endwalker so one copying the other would be impossible) but even though they are very different games they are using similar tropes. as is tradition. see wow and the whole light vs shadow, life vs death, etc. so while i was watching the many videos summarizing the lore of destiny, i couldn't help but feel a sense of deja vu.

SPOILERS FOR ENDWALKER BELLOW. if you havent played ffxiv, i think it will still make some sense. probably. if you don't want spoilers you can jump to the next section.

the main antagonist of endwalker, final boss of the darkness vs light saga, is not the embodiment of darkness or light. it's the endsinger, an nihilistic empath. look at stuff she says in endwalker:

that they [other civilizations] would never be free of fear and sorrow, anger and despair - of loneliness - so long as they yet lived.

and:

there is no need to struggle in vain, for in nihility awaits salvation.

and more:

but even death, we learned, isn't truly the end. it is but a part of the cycle of rebirth.[…] true salvation lies not in dying. it lies in not being born.

and if we go back to the witness:

you promised them life… but deliver only death. as you have for so many before. enough. enough death. enough life.

which i believe to be the same sentiment: living is meaningless. even dying is not enough, because (if the witness really came from the river of souls) we are all connected anyway. we are still in the cycle/flower game.

here's more from the endsinger (spoken to the player):

come, let me relieve you of your burden. you have suffered enough.

and the witness, again (spoken to/about the traveler):

the universe makes us all victim… and perpetrator… of its infinite cruelty. you, more than any, suffer both fates. be free.

the endsinger and the witness are our salvation. they will relieve us from existing - from suffering, from being the plaything of fate and other people (ffxiv) and/or of higher forces (destiny). they will deliver us back into nothingness.

i could be bringing too much of ffxiv into destiny, of course, but the games follow a similar path re: light and dark. the warrior of light and the guardian both start serving the light because the light is good and darkness is evil (base games + first expansions). then we learn that the darkness is not necessarily evil at all (shadowbringers for ffxiv, beyond light for destiny) and that the light can be bad (also shadowbringers, then witch queen for destiny). i mean, the name of the expansion is shadowbringers and we use the darkness now in destiny. we can tap into both.

(these are common tropes! we could be following the same path!)

this all makes me believe that we might have a final showdown in destiny that will be a bit similar to the one in ffxiv. the endsinger was the downfall of her creators (the ancients). i believe the witness will be (or try to be) the downfall of its own creators as well (the winnower and the gardener and, of course, the flower game). the one thing that is different here is that the endsinger never used darkness in any way - she used dynamis, which is completely apart from dark or light. but the witness does use darkness. so idk. maybe this is all nonsense!! maybe im seeing ffxiv in everything!!

though i do like the idea of the end boss of the darkness and light saga not being the light or the darkness. it wasn't in ffxiv. maybe it wont be in destiny.

final considerations

there are problems. and thoughts.

if the witness isn't the first knife, where the hell is the first knife? or the winnower?

i mean, maybe the traveler is the gardener, maybe it is a servant of the gardener - it doesn't matter right now. for all intents and purposes it follows the gardener's vision. so where is the thing that serves the winnower's vision? why is it allowing the traveler to prance about willy-nilly?

it isn't, you say. the thing that serves the winnower's vision is the witness and this whole theory is wrong.

which could be true, fair enough. but! maybe the creation-will-be-the-downfall-of-creator trope is already in play here. maybe the witness ate the darkness (winnower) and now it wants to drink the light (isn't there a wall somewhere that says something like this? the drinking the light thing?)

for all i know the veil could be the first knife. a link between dark and light. a window into the memory of the universe. feels kind of like the traveler. yada yada. i'm spitballing here.

where has the witness gone? ive seen theories that maybe it went back in time to the garden. which i can see. maybe it wants to kill the traveler/gardener, go back to the garden and stop the flower game from ever existing.

which would mean that the traveler isn't gone or dead, it just... got eaten and is currently not existing in some weird way. who knows. we still have access to the light, right?

veil -> window into mind and memory of the universe -> river of souls connects all living and dead things aka the universe itself -> strand which comes from the river of souls is stronger near the veil -> the river of souls is the mind and memory of the universe, the veil is its window -> the witness comes from the river of souls and is now using its window to get a glimpse of a memory/mind of the universe -> which is the garden. idk!

if the ghosts come from the river of souls, how the traveler has access to it since its a darkness thing? hm

that's it, i guess. like i said, im a destiny noob so this might be all wrong. who knows!!! i should be working.

[potatoesandsunshine]

hi anna now i dont have a New fic ask game for u but what i CAN do is send u more from that one from like last week. 6, 12, 15, 25, 34? :)

thank u abby <3 it made me really happy to do these :) 

6. Vaguely spoil one of your fics without telling us which one it is

depressed woman decides to invent a new, sexier form of self-destruction, only to stumble into one of the oldest forms of self-destruction there is

12. What fandom do you want to write for more often?

literally any of them the writing output has not been good more video games!! i wanna write dragon age stuff i have a BUNCH of dragon age ideas and we’re at the point where i am able to overcome the Fear Of People Wanting Me To Be Lore Compliant. i’ve discovered ‘fuck it who cares’ in a real way. older games too - it was so fun writing about oblivion when i did my last playthrough, and i’ve got a skyrim idea that’s been on the backburner for about ten years so it should almost be time to write it. but also i just need to branch out from critical role; i like it so much but i get really stuck in a rut with it these days. if i had the brain space to get into a new tv show i’d even take something with that - my best friend had been trying to get me into true blood for a couple years now so maybe there’s potential in that direction. i’ve been kicking around a silly percy jackson idea after the tv series came out? i kinda just feel like tv is the way forward

15. What fic of yours would you most like to rewrite?

the one that is by far my most popular fic, revolutions in new orbit. i’m glad it makes people happy. i got a comment on it really recently from someone who still loves it! unfortunately i think it suffers from ‘wrote it in a rush four years ago’ syndrome and it is RIDDLED with things that bug me. i hate the pacing. i think the word choice is clumsy. parts that are supposed to have tension feel flat to me. there are so many FUCKING commas

25. Which fic do you think is your saddest?

probably chili, quiche, casserole, a taz amnesty fic from truly forever ago. it’s another that i see as sort of clumsy writing, but it’s literally all about sympathy meals and draws extremely heavily from my own experience with trying to support people in grief. it’s a much more real-life based fic than the couple of ‘oh this character died here’s my farewell to them’ oneshots i’ve written, and i really needed it at the time.

34. What title do you want to use, but can't figure out a story to fit?

you like to think that you’re immune to the stuff (yes from addicted to love :P i love that song sm. can we talk about the florence and the machine cover yet)

no amount of coffee, no amount of crying (from gotta have you by the weepies. can we talk about the samia cover yet)

not everyone’s got a sleeve where they can wear their heart (from riding into the sunset in a busted car by free cake for every creature)

the madness on young lovers’ lips (fast like a match) (from fast like a match by river whyless)

yes we get naked but not naked enough (from every body by thao)

as you know i love songs i love lyrics and a lot of times i hear something and think ‘that’s a title’

[sosos-adventures]

General impressions about Vietnam so far:

1: the traffic. People mostly get around by using a scooter. They sont care about crosswalks, the mostly care about traffic lights though. But if you cross a road and a scooter wants to turn right, they will. So alway look out for them. To survive, just confidently cross the road and NEVER walk backwards. So as a pedestrian its ok to get along. Biking in big cities I would not recommend. In smaller cities like Hoi An it works quite well. Just go with the flow, dont hesitate and just bike confidently enough to seem like you know what you are doing. Funfact: our bikes here in Hoi An dont really have breaks. So having to suddenly stop because a scooter is crossing your way is not as easy and probably looks super funny to our surrounding.

2: traffic part 2. When checking google maps, you can see that distances like 30km take over an hour by car/bus. The roadnetwork is not as good as others and generally there is so mich traffic that there is no chance to get somehwere fast. Sadly there are also almost no local buses to find online. If you plan on visiting cool sightseeing spots like My Son for example, you have to book an "expensive" shuttle. Tahts how we lost a lot of money already. Also in Vietnam google maps doesnt have the symbol for bikes. Instead you see the symbol for motorbikes. So whenever we take the bike we have no idea how long we actually need to get from A to B.

3: Dogs everywhere. No matter where you go, in every street you can find some dogs. Not the bigger ones. Usually there are many smaller dogs. We dont know if they are stray dogs or belong to someone. Its really interesting to see how they behave so differently based on the city. In Mui Ne for example the dogs were super protective about their street and barked a lot. In Hoi An there are so many dogs but they dont bark, they dont run around mich. They just sit in their street and look at us. We thought people might drug them so they are calm.

4: trash. We knew that visiting an asian country will be very different to what we are used to when it comes to trash. People use plastuc bags for EVERYTHING. Even the tiniest thing comes with a plastic bag. The streets have lots of garbage bags around and trash at the sidewalks which isnt that bad actually. More frustrating is the fact that novody seems to care about what happens with the trash. In Hoi An every night people sell little paper lanterns with candles in it to the tourist to put them in the river for some nice light shows. They burn down and float with the river somewhere or are washed up. Also whats up with these trash cans here in Ho An? Just for tourists?

5: restaurants. There are so many touristic places you can eat food. More expensive ones and cheaper ones where apparently locals also eat. We tried some different kinds of restaurants and usually they serve all types of food. From local disheds to american burgers, italian pizza etc. Even the smalles resgaurants have a huge variety of food. How do they prepare all of these different types of food in just one small kitchen? Still strabge to us. But at least we are getting better at finding cheap restaurants to eat at where they serve lots of local dishes to try for just 2-3€ a meal. Sadly most of the food is not vegetarian. It tastes really good but its hard to find veggie meals.

6: healthy stomach: the myth about ice cubes and raw veggies. I have been to Asia before and learned not to drink tap water, drinks with ice in it, nor to eat raw veggies or salad. We were super careful the first 3 days and kept seeing other tourists eating salad, veggies and drinking the water they offer you in the restaurant. Google told us that its safe to drink drinks with ice cubes that have a hole in it because they are manifactured. On our day trip to the Mekong Delta we met 2 other Germans who told us that they so far have eaten and drunk everytjing without any consequences. So now we are starting to relax a little more and risk it. Lets see how that will go.