#i can not go to my partner with these concerns bc he's the one who introduced me to Arcane and LoL

[vershautece]

girl i'm japanese and his tweet abt the birthrate issue in japan lowkey had me like 🥵 bc.. although not perfect, he's got some points! if anyones interested —due to the ongoing issues/movement here, and in korea — he actually had really good reception and high praise to that tweet + the isekai life "can this trash be illegal" one (it got translated in forums) bc its soooo rare to see a man, let alone a westerner, showing an interest and giving an opinion abt asian society that accurately highlights the flaws of MEN for once instead of women! (and without it coming off as a white man fetishising us too!! re: his distaste towards isekai games, maid/anime cafes, and him actually viewing women as partners not characters) like ik i shouldn't be turned on by the bare minimum but.. comparing him to the microdick men we face daily who are the most abhorrently violent misogynistic pigs to exist, yet loveee to blame the declining birthrates on women/feminism/misandry etc. its truly like day and night 😭 i would've loveeed to just talk and banter w him coz i know he's open minded and curious, and (in my delusional mind) to have just been a voice of compassion to stray him away from that manospheric stoic lean he seemed so lost abt :( (and give him a pass to joke abt the birthrate tally going up while i let him hit it raw ok listen!! ik its speculation he liked asian girls but let us have it kdfkdk i would happily be the most submissive tradwife for him) ps. love ur blog sm thanks for being a safe space for us degenerates 🩷

tysm haha 🩵🩵

thank u for this insight!! when we first saw his twitter i saw some ppl saying he’s just one of those white men who likes to fetishise asian women and critique japanese culture from a superior sort of view but i thought his tweets were actually really insightful and proof of his genuine care about cultures and humanity (i doubt that those ppl who had the opposite interpretation of the tweet would still agree with what they said now, bc that was when everyone thought he was red pilled lol but now we know what sort of person he is) so it’s good to hear that that’s how u received his tweet too! also on the call with gurwinder he was so concerned about loss of human connection in japan, it’s a genuine interest for him

[inkskinned]

she says he won't let her get a dog, which is fine, because they're in an apartment, and that's the kind of thing people say about their partners. he won't let me get a dog. and you're at a dinner party and you tilt your head a little to the side just like that dog he won't let her get, because is this the thing that's going to upset you? you don't know every corner of their relationship, she could be joking, they could have had so many healthy conversations about the dog, right, and maybe she's not letting herself get the dog because of money and time and whatever. but, like, she did say let

and she wants to move away from his hometown and he wants to stay and then he tells you with a wink and a conspiratorial stage whisper don't worry i'll convince her and she laughs about it - so clearly this is something they laugh about. but you do just stand there and stare at him like what the fuck, man. you can't say what you want to say which is why do you get the final say on everything because they're both obviously aware of the other person's stance on this and have obviously had private conversations about it and what are you going to do about it except make a scene and then he'll be mad at you and call you one of those bitches behind your back and she'll cut you off, which is a loss that doesn't feel worth it just because he makes you a little skeeved out every 3rd comment

and they both agree he just isn't the type to get flowers which is fine because everyone shows love differently, and are you really gonna judge someone based on their sense of individual relationship responsibility? maybe he's constantly cleaning her car and writing her poems and making her furniture or something. maybe she doesn't even like flowers and this is perfect, actually. and no you couldn't date him, obviously, ew; but like, she tells you she's happy. you almost send her a tiktok that says don't be 25 and the cool girl that doesn't need anything, you'll hate not getting flowers at 30, but that's like, starting drama & you shouldn't start drama needlessly.

and you're a little older than her but not so much older you can pull the whole trust me on this one babe thing and besides that wouldn't have worked anyway (when does it ever) and besides you have trauma so you and your therapist both agree that you're always looking for a problem even when there isn't one. and you tell yourself that just because you see them for 15 minutes every month does not mean you can identify every single red flag based on a single shitty half-joking(?) comment

and besides, what are you going to do? she says i actually wanted another stand mixer but thankfully he stops me when i'm about to spend too much money and you're standing there like are you okay? is this normal? is this just something people say? and again - what are you going to do?

to your therapist you try to language it - it's not, like, any of my business. but sometimes, doesn't it feel like - you should do something. there's got to be something, right? you've tried dropping little hints but they sail right through and you've tried having a single serious conversation and she got upset because why does it matter to you, yes it's different but we're happy, it doesn't need to make sense to you and you're like. really unwilling to push a boundary about it anymore; because the truth is that you know logically it shouldn't matter to you, as long as both parties are happy.

and besides, you've been wrong before. it's just... like, every time you see them both, something else happens, some kind of shiver down your spine like do you even hear each other when you talk. it's their strange, bickering orbit. just the way he's on his phone through dinner or watching sports instead of helping in the kitchen or, fuck, another one of these little throwaway comments he makes about we'll see about that, babe. she laughs when he calls her passions stupid shit and meanwhile she gets him tickets to see the knicks and he tells you well at least she's smart about something and still! it's none of your business.

you say get the dog anyway and she laughs. like, this is is you being funny. and not you saying - no really. get the dog. get the dog and get out of here. pack up and start running.

[allroseshave-their-pricks]

y'all please give me the strength to NOT get into LoL as a coping mechanism for Arcane ending

[mr-bas00nist]

Maybe like the uncle of toge who has the same curse speech and uses it to make their partner come as much as they want as often as they want?

I was thinking gojo for this request but honestly do whoever you’d prefer bc you deserve it 🧡

Follow My Command

✧.*-Sub! Gojo Satoru x Dom! Male! Reader

✧.*-Cw: Overstimulation, daddy kink and a spank like once and blowjobs

Being an older cursed speech user meant you knew how to use your technique. You didn’t have to speak rice ball ingredients like your nephew did, although, you used too. Now, as a talented sorcerer, you knew what words to avoid and which ones to speak. It wasn’t a huge concern anymore like it used to be.

You had met Gojo on a mission a while back. After the mission ended you two talked for a while since he noticed your telltale cursed speech marks. He explained to you that he actually knew your nephew to which you couldn’t help but smile to yourself. Your nephew was funny and a sweetheart, good to know he was helping him get stronger.

Eventually you two were sent on more missions and you ran into him more when you visited Toge. So you two just decided to talk to each other out of work. You two hit it off on a personal level and became good friends. Then, even more.

‎‧₊˚✧Timeskip✧˚₊‎‧

You and Satoru were currently relaxing at home, you had a lazy arm hung over his waist. “Can I ask you something baby?” You and Satoru’s relationship was still new so you two still hadn’t done certain things. “Sure.” You responded as you tilted your head.

That list included sex. “Well, we’ve been together long enough,” Satoru paused glancing around with a smile. “We should have sex.” You smiled softly and nodded. “I’d love to-“ Satoru smirked as he put a finger up though, pausing you

“But, I say you add your cursed technique to it.” He smirked as he tapped your lips then moved to your tattoos. You hummed as you stuck your tongue out in thought. “Okay.” You nodded as you gripped his face kissing him. You leaned into his ear with a smile on your face.

“Get undressed and wait patiently on the bed.” You told him as he obeyed (obviously) with a giddy smile on his face. When you went upstairs you saw him laying on the bed with his cock standing in attention. He panted with a small sheen of sweat on his face.

You smiled walking over as you hummed sitting on the bed as you took your pants off. “Get on your knees and suck me off.” He obviously couldn’t say no so he got down and unbuckled your pants. His warm glossy lips enveloping your tip as he let out a content noise.

You moaned softly as his head gently bobbed up and down. He peered up at you through white lashes before refocusing on your pelvis. You gripped his white hair before leaning your head back. “Shit- slack your jaw.” You felt his jaw loosen as you pulled his face back to you.

You groaned as you fucked his mouth with vigor. He gagged and choked as he gripped your thighs while you bobbed his face up and down. “Are you okay Satoru?” You asked through rough movements. You looked down to see his eyes colorful blue eyes were rolled back in his head, tears cascading down his face as he choked violently.

You laugh to yourself before ordering another command. “Breathe through your nose.” You heard him take a sharp inhale through his nose as his eyes came down a bit. Your orgasm crashed into you unexpectedly as you pulled his face down into you, nose hitting your pelvis.

You gently pulled his head off as he panted. Mouth dripping with your cum and his spit as his jaw remained slack, his blue eyes reddened from crying. You smiled as he then swallowed giving you a dumb smile. You smiled before uttering a small, “cum.”

You saw Satoru keen over as he let out a loud moan, cum spurting out on the hardwood floors. His eyes widened as he saw you give an innocent smile. “T-that’s a dirty fucking trick-!” He spoke before letting out another moan. “Cum again.” He mewled as his eyes rolled back.

You smiled before glancing over to the bed as you spoke. “Go on the bed face down, ass up.” He crawled up on the bed as you smacked his ass while he went by. You hummed as you gripped his hips tightly as you set your dick on his ass.

“This is gonna be a long night you know?” You asked with a smirk in your voice. To which Satoru whined softly. You gave a smack to his ass as you rubbed it softly. “Answer me.” You spoke with a soft pout.

“Yes daddy.”

A/n: Had a lot of fun writing this one! I have a Choso story coming up next then I’ve got a wholesome one with Raiden from MGS. Hope you guys enjoyed, keep requesting ✌🏽.

[haveihitanerve]

We’re going down, down the sea lads. Hold onto your sheep!

The Lighthouse Commentary- (bc one of you lovelies suggested it :))

Sam’s face immediately starting strong because what XD

“... you cant close up a lighthouse.” Sam’s initial confusion. Oh brother this is gonna be fun…

Luke’s cackling off to the side as Tom grins

“I meant for me.” Quick save AJ, nicely done, very good

“Its quite late.” “it is really late!” Aj sounds ready to genuinely cry, i feel like this was performed at a really late time in real life and AJ wants to go to bed lol 

“Maybe this job isn't for yoUUU!” idk but i like the way he said it- also still feel like they’re referencing the comedy show/real life and not the characters in the play- idk why i feel like this but something about their speaking patterns lmao

“This job is for me!” >:( 

“Lighthouse-man.” “li-lighthouse-man?” “yeah. yeah.” Thats right Aj- stand your ground!

“Im doing this on internship-” “you're doing an internship-” glad you both got to say it boys, really solidified the internship bit, nice

“I've never seen a woman. I don't- what's that?” AJ making everything more drastic and chaotic, perfect, that's what i like to see XD

And breaking Sam along with it, beautiful

“The LIGHT!” reaches for it- ok aj, commit, nice :D

The eyes rolling allllll the way into the back of his head is totally not terrifying-

“The light is great. The light keeps sheeps- ships-sheets-” AJ breaking fully as he explodes a laugh but trying to maintain character at the same time is hilarious he looks like he's shitting XD

“There's nothing like the light of a woman's laughter.” damn sam. That's poetic. If my future partner don't say that i don't want ‘em

Tom’s little sheep mehhrrr is beautiful

“A rumspringa.” Sam purposefully using words he knows AJ doesn't know what they mean- asshole XD

“You know the amish.” “...yeees?” “.Go on.” Sam you menace XD

AJ throwing a glance at Tom for help

“Why are you telling ME to go on? You brought it up!” Fair point, very fair point, Sam’s just being mean lmaoo

Ok AJ does not, in fact, know who Amish are, but its fine, after a quick little giggle break Sam is incorporating a family called Amish into the story, so its fine XD

“Going down… down the sea.” I appreciate his commitment i gotta be honest

“Do- do you mean South?” They just cant let AJ have anything can they? Lol

“Do you know what happened?” Sam: “...i think i can guess” LMAOOO

“Through the smoke..” “the smoke?!?!?” Sam is genuinely concerned lol. “Through the smoke, cause there was fire on the ship.” “oh shit!” Sam did not see that coming XD

“Through the- it was really bad!” Now aj feels the need to explain his story, wonderful 

Luke giving flashback noises, and AJ just repeating them??? Brilliant teamwork boys, 10/10 lol

Tom, of course, cant be excluded: keep going DOWN lads!!! Keep going DOWN the sea!!!

Luke and Tom have casually taken over the scene now XD

“By the way- by “down the sea” do you mean south???” They just really cant let Aj live!!!! Lmaooo

“My brother passed away.” oh my gods Aj what kind of lore are you giving yourself????

‘“MY SON! MY ONLY SON!” Luke, no no, Aj is still alive- “APART FROM MY OTHER SON!” There you go, now Aj keeps going- “WHO I DON'T RESPECT AT ALL!!!” now that just seems unnecessary - XD

“THE CONSTANT DISAPPOINTMENT!” Oh luke is still going, oka- “I BET HE’D RATHER BE ON FUCKING LAND!!” Luke!!! Let him finish his traumatic backstory about why he wants to be a lighthouse keeper!!!! Come on!!! XD

“So I don't care- bout how fucking great women are!” the smile as he says it because ohhh noo thats not how he meant that to come across at all lmaooo XD

“Im just saying… give it a go.” And that was too much for AJ and we get another quick laugh, beautiful 

Sam casually stealing the chair luke was going to sit on to force him to grab another one lol

“Oh the sheep aren't shitting like they used to.” I love how unwilling they are to let a single mistake go, its absolutely fantastic lol! Also Sam’s sheep impression is spot on

“Daughter.” “oh!” Tom was not expecting that to be his role, but ok then :) 

“Like someones- shutting the curtains randomly!” Side eyes AJ hard 

[sheep panic]

[sheep straining] love how sams automatic reaction is to just do the opposite of what luke said lol

“The sheep are just too inbred.” Sam:... *wait a fucking minute*..? He took that personally lmaooo

“That ones got a mostly bald face.” Luke: *looks at Aj* Sam: *also looks around* Tom: no you you fucking idiots-

[sheep baas] fuck you -sam really did take it personally, but then again, Tom also made it personal XD

“The easen- eastern portion.” “the easen-eastern portion yeah.” Tom XD

“Look at this sheep holding another sheep!” Tom, i just don't think thats what his stagecraft is lol

Sam: *contemplating how to do this*... wasn't what i was going for, but…

Luke's explosion of laughter and the way Tom made direct eye contact with Sam when he said it lol

“Oh no my eyes betray me!” *waits expectantly for a clue as to wtf sam is holding*

“The quality of the wooool is poor.” He really needed to emphasize that word lol.

“Fuck you.” are those the only words this sheep can say???XD

“Going under? You mean its going- “down the sea”??” Tom really missed not being a part of the first scene i think…

“South you might say.” But only might! ;)

“Maybe we could send the sheep?” Tom sounds genuinely surprised that he himself suggested it

“I would be up for, sending the sheep *starts giggling* to be the main character!” *sam preparing himself, fastening up a tie and grabbing his briefcase* “of this story!” i love how both Tom and Sam are fashioning it in a way as though they are asking Luke for permission to do it XD

“Are you sure? Cause i was throwing it out there but..” of course now you backpedal Tom- make it his fault if the plot fails XD- smarttttt

“Why don't we go together?” “ahh fuck.” Sam really hates this storyline lmaooo

“You know i've never seen a man!” Sam’s absolutely done with all of them lmaoooooo

SAM! For legal reasons i will not be transcribing the action he did, but i shall give you the captions- [;)]

“They want one☝️thing!” “And whats that?” “se-ee-ex.” Luke’s disappointed turn around to look at Sam while he barely holds it together XD

“Well where are they gonna get that???” Tom, you beautiful beautiful child, his only purpose right now is to piss off the other three and i adore that for him

HES LITERALLY GIGGLING- this man is too cute omg-

Sam: *in sheep gesticulation* please just send me, i don't care that i have to play two characters in one scene, and that one of them is a sheep, tom is out of his fucking mind, please luke you know its smart- 

Or at least thats what i got from it

Luke’s little giggle and pat of Sam’s arm when Aj cuts their scene 🤧 so cute-

“Whats it like up there?” “Sorry?” *gets terrifyingly close* “whats. It. like. Up. there.” Aj looks disgusted and mildly put off but not totally concerned and i love that for their friendship :) 

“Its fucking dark though.” Luke is bamboozled. “Oh its fuck- you think its fucking dark up there??? With a great big fucking light?!?!” he slipped accents there for a sec and went into distraught Luke lol (i don't think aj knows how a lighthouse works, or what it even is, and if the boys knew that then they are evil and brilliant, and if they didn't then its still amusing as hell XD)

“Shining *starts laughing as AJ also breaks* in your eyes???” AJ is struggling to get the story right lol. “Do you have any idea what you do for a job???” I think Luke is genuinely curious lmaoo

Sam now having to step in because AJ has confused him too much so he has to clarify it too XD they're such idiots and i adore it

Tom joining the scene because he feels left out- classic

“Ill settle this honey-” oh sam 🫣

“NO IT WAS-” “AAAEEHHUUHUHAA!” Mocking each other like proper siblings XD this is the best thing ever

“I just wanted some fresh air :(“ leave him alone sam! “In the basement.” ofc the last jabbed parting words XD

AJ’s annoyed grin. “Alright- fucking- im outside now!” LMAOOOO

“Will you stop standing with your hooves on your hips?” Sam: *casually strikes a pose and baas annoyingly with a grin because he knows itll piss Tom off more* XD

Again, for legal reasons, not going to transcribe that 😑

“Excuse me-?” “oh!” Tom’s little gasp that makes Luke have to clamp a hand over his mouth to stop laughing. Gorgeous boys 

“Its a man..” The quiet awe- tom you're brilliant omg never change

“What the fuck are you?” YESS!!!! Both sides XD this is the best thing in my life 

“You're- you're a woman.” even tom cant stop his grin- they are such cuties omfg-

“Supposed to be a man are you?” Sam, never one to let an insult aimed at AJ go unnoticed: [baaa] nice ✋

“Thats right im a lighthouse keeper.” “[baa] what?” Sam cocking his head because wow Aj you just casually stole his job and lied to the first woman you've ever met. Tsk tsk

“Whats your name?” “poppy.” ok aj you're off the hook because now Sam is looking at Tom judgmentally lmaooo

“Oh its cause your sisters called poppy oh alright.” ….. Excuse me for one second. *leaves to go scream into the void* im back….. They just FUCKING- KNOW?>?????? THE NAME OF HIS SIST- AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH *im gonna go die of cuteness for one sec gimme a moment* idk why but the subtle reminders they are friends and actually know each other kill me. Anyway carry on-

Luke loosing it as Tom connects the dots and Tom motioning the “gears turning” to AJ to try and get him to get it too XD

(Atp they've just abandoned the “yes, and?” joke and started a “aj said one thing wrong once and now we’re gonna make this entire play all about it” and honestly, im here for it)

Also atp they're just competing to see who can make Sam stay in the scene and stand the longest and who can annoy the others the most and i am even more here for that lol

“My dad named me after the sheep.” the way Sam’s tongue is in his cheek as he watches Tom incorporate it into the story and his slow turn away

“Shes an old sheep now.” Sams eyebrows shoot into his hairline

“My names Clint.” “Clint?” Tom’s eyebrows are also in his hairline. “Are you sure?” (psst, Master Ybobb! Its bobby)

Tom treating Sam’s [baaing] as the translator game and just going off the rails lmaoo

“But the lights inside the curtain.” and thats too much for Sam- the way he leans against Tom for emotional support is so cute- 😭💗

Sam is soooo close to ripping his hair out, Tom is thoroughly enjoying whatever the hell i going on, and Luke is just laughing at them all

“Are all men this stupid?” Sam’s head bob as he points to Aj- help😭 hes trying his best guys! (seriously tho, what does Aj think a lighthouse is?)

“Are all women like you?” AJ had to come up with something didn't he lol

“Im just trying to be a good lighthouse keeper and im new at it!” poor baby. “Well you're clearly not.” ooooooohhhhhh. Damn tom. Ruthless

“My sheep will deal with you.” Smart Tom, very smart

AJ just casually stemming his hand against Sam’s forehead XD

“One.. two… three.” Sam, baby i just don't think hes gonna pick up on that 😭

“Im not sure whats happening.” yeah…

“Oh please know what this is.” Sam sounds genuinely distressed, poor guy😭😂

More cocaine, poor sam 

Sam and Tom are done with him 😭

“I've just got this bitch here-” AJ thoroughly enjoyed caling Tom that lol XD

“You cheeky fuck.” Aj though he could sit down lol

“Its nice to have a female presence in the lighthouse.” “thank you.” Turns judgmentally to Aj

“Your intern? Your INTERN, is it?” wow Tom, not holding back at all, very nice XD

[one more!] audience member i love you- especially because its funny but also because it made luke laugh lol

“Someones right on the rule of three :D” *seems genuinely overjoyed at this fact* “don't give it to em” “I wont!” oh come on guys!! “Make them wait for it!” thank you sam “Ill make them wait- THE INTERN!” diva turn and he gave us what we wanted, perfection

Ajs grin when it happens too, Sam might be suffering, but the other three are thoroughly enjoying this lol

“By the way whats his name?” “clint.” oh no sam not you too!

“Clint.” Tom sounds so judgy 😭

Sam: they say his father was a sea-men Tom: *eyebrows shoot up, then back down* thats how all little boys are made, aye

TOM!!! XD

“Sorry who- who offered you any part of it? I DIDN'T OFFER YOU ANY PART OF IT!” gorgeous work tom, flawless

“But he never talks about his mum.” guys, its almost the end of the play, why are we adding more plot???

“It seems like you want to give me some sort of backstory.” some people might call this meta, but if i were having a convo with a dude and they said this line, i would also think they want to give me backstory lol

“The light!” “the curtains!” at least they picked up on both stagecrafts. “Why would that make any difference?” “why both-?” “why both?” “why not just one of those things- *starts laughing*” they really cant let aj rest at all can they?? Lol

“Now the light isn't getting in from the outside!” Tom’s spin, now hes starting to get a little done with AJ just like Sam lol! “Oh! If only the curtains were open, this lightbulb would be giving light!” poor AJ 😭😂

“-head like a fucking egg-” fully breaks character and shatters the fourth wall XD

“Hey you! You bald fucker!” Sam: *gasps as though he hasn't just said the literal exact thing only slightly less bluntly* :0

“Yes? Can i help you?” Luke annoyed now too, glorious XD

“Grant i don't need you, fuck off grant.” “i feel like we've bullied him a lot today.” you don't say XD Lukes helpless shrug. “I know but hes pissed me off!” I love the way Aj just stays out of frame lol- hes not getting involved until he has to 

“You called me a bald fucker.” AJ’s strut onto the stage is iconic “i've got a whole head of hair in this scene you little twat.” Luke and Aj both laughing at each other- cuties. 

“Hey!” now Tom joins, because the scene wasn't chaotic enough. “What are you calling this 6’5 muscular powerhouse a little twat for?!?!” XD i cant anymore-

“Im gonna leave again!” you do that King

[sheep running off a cliff]

[sheep landing SPECTACULARLY]

“The one who gets made fun of. *brilliant mocking of Sam follows, beautiful*” theyre such siblings your honor its wonderful

“Stupid egg!” Sam’s cackle off stage is amazing

“What do you mean they make fun of you?” AJ’s grin as he circles luke- luke you literally started the scene with “you bald fucker!” like come on, XD

“James, the lighthouse keeper. And this new *starts laughing* bitch woman that i just met!” 

“I hope you're not talking about my daughter!?!?” “Was she tall?” “Aye.” “like freakishly tall-” trying desperately to level the playing field XD help aj- 

“Aye, like me! 6’5!” Luke really enjoyed Tom’s addition didn't he lol

“Weirdly tall.” “yeah yeah yeah, weirdly tall yeah. HUGE adams apple.” oh so now theyre teaming up on tom, i see, i see- theyre such fucking siblings dude XD

*laughing at their skilled insults together*

“My mother was wonderful.” “...okay.” yeah Luke, just smile and nod, good plan, who knows what to answer to that in these situations because i sure don't

“It seems like you wanna give us some sort of backstory…” sneaky sam, sneaky sneaky…

*exits while baaaing* AJ: *no no, we cant let this go* no you come here *the finger flick he does- help* Luke: *because he is a gremlin agent of chaos* no no you come here,

Poor sam doesn't get a break from a single scene 😭 thats what he gets for trying to be a cheeky sneaky little shit tho lmaooo

“She said “go.” *makes direct eye contact* “go down the sea.” yes AJ!!! SPEAK YOUR TRUTH!!!

Sam singing quietly in the background, not sure what hes singing but its great, adds ambiance

“Anyway what’d you want?” *forgets what scene hes in* “Im having a stroke over here.” luke please help him out XD

“It was my wife.” *dramatic gasp* Sam: *obliterates the fourth wall as a sheep* what a twist

“Good thing he didn't fuck your daughter.” Sam go back to being a sheep and baaing please-

AJ’s small smile as he appreciates Sam’s joke

“I wish this sheep would run off a fucking cliff.” getting his anger out for all the jokes XD

LUke laughing- with the tongue in his cheek- ahh hes so cute

Sam just flipping Aj off and making him laugh before finally getting to leave a scene XD

“Mario come back!” Tom having drag Sam from the chair because fucks sake he just got to sit down- but nope! Hes gotta be in every scene lmaoooo

“You're gonna be here til the bitter end.” Sam’s head hang of sadness as Tom breaks the fourth wall lol

“Father, have i missed some plot details?” I fear you might've poppy. Also sam rubbing his nose as an aside to pretend seeking cocaine again, brilliant

“I saw you die that day.” “no- no” “no-” “oh gods.” they're all so disappointed its wonderful XD

“Ill use all my human bits okay?” So the inbred joke did grant some uses didn't it Sam?

“Whats wrong with your sheep?” AJ taking joy in pointing out their mistakes now lol

“We gotta finish this show in five minutes-” Sam is done lmaoooo

“Im getting madness from the lighthouse-” The way sam pauses his struggle to actually laugh at that and grabs AJ’s waist, idk why i guess he just needed to hold onto someone to keep from falling apart at the seams-

“I am a sheep. *deep inhale* I’m gonna do some cocaine.” i think that was just sam and not sheep sam… XD

Sam: *finally gets to sit down* “You are my half son-” Sam: *fuck* no- no- no -NO

“You- nothing- NOTHING!” real sam coming out again… lmaooo

“So you, you're my cousin!” Tom fully understood what was happening, he was the only one who remembered bobby’s name- he was just being a litte shit and i fully believe that- AJ’s grin reveals he knows it too- fuckng hell- and Luke’s little jump as he screams “NO!” is adorable

AJ and Tom grinning at each other like dorks while Sam loses it and Luke tries to separate them

“WILL YOU-” AJ and Tom making eye contact and nodding, because hell yeah this bit’ll get ‘em goooood “MARRY ME?!?!” 

Sam explodes, Luke finally decides to end the chaos, and Tom and AJ are thoroughly enjoying themselves

Tom’s little backrub for Sam at the end… awwww

And luke’s consoling pat as AJ just grins and Sam tries not to murder them all XD

@flamingbluepanda @snek-of-eden @dawn-speckled

Sooooo an alternate title for the video could just be “Four Best Friends Competing to Piss Each Other Off The Most” but, y'know, i like The Lighthouse too. 

Anyway this was one of the most chaotic, belly aching, cheeks hurting play of theirs i have seen up to date and i loved every minute of it. AJ was just adding more plot and plotholes, Tom’s only goal was to antagonize everyone who stepped into his line of vision, (specifically Sam), Luke was somewhat trying to follow the plot but mainly just going for insults and gremlin activities, and Sam was losing his mind. :) beautiful. 10/10. 

(also, the way that this is one of the only plays where they forget to say “and hopefully an end” is kinda ironic lmaoo)

anyway hope you enjoyed it as much as i did :)

[plaguechyld]

I HAVE A REQUEST FOR YOU!!!

Gently fucking kagaya to sleep bc he's been so stressed lately :((( He's trying so hard to stay awake but he's just too sleepy and and comfortable.

OMG YESYESYEYSYEYSYESSS AHHH ❤️❤️

This poor man is so stressed, always visiting the graves of the dead slayers. :(( His body just can’t take the long walks but that doesn’t stop him from trying, but when he heard that Kyojuro died he was just so upset even if he wouldn’t show it. :(( He really wants to stay up all night again memorizing his dead slayers names but his body is just so weak and tired from all the stress. :((( So it’s up to his dear partner to fuck him to sleep, but make sure to be gentle with him, he can’t take it if you’re rough and/or mean. :(

Contains: 18+ content, soft sex, Dom!Reader, Sub!Kagaya, Reader being a gentle dom, cute fluffy sex

Kagaya’s hand shakes as he reaches it up and gently pinches the bridge of his nose, tiredness fogged his mind and it made him hard to listen to you reading out the seemingly never ending list of deceased slayers.

He was so determined to not let his weariness get the best of him. In his mind he needed to memorize his fallen comrades, if he didn’t know their names then who would?

“Dear, could you repeat the name you said… I didn’t quite get it. I’m sorry..” Kagaya says quietly, his voice is sleepy and his blind eyes are half lidded. You can’t help but feel concerned for your husband, and also admire him. He showed so much effort despite his ailing state, never once stopping despite his sickness. You sigh softly and rest your hand over Kagaya’s slightly shaky one and rub the back of his hand with your thumb. Gently, you ease him out of his chair wordlessly, helping him up and having him lay down on your shared bed. He looks up at you with his sightless eyes, a calmly confused look on his face.

“Y/n, why have you.. laid me down? I need to memorize more names…” He says softly. Kagaya is surprised when he’s met by your gentle hand rubbing his cheek, though he leans into the touch. His cheeks redden slightly when he feels you ease your way on top of him.

“Y/n…” He starts, however you cut him over with a finger being placed on his lips. “You need to rest, you’re working too hard, my dear.” You say to him in that gentle voice he loves oh so much. He was about to protest when he feels your soft lips on his neck, making him suck in a soft gasp. Almost instinctively, he spreads his legs, blush coating his cheeks even more now. You smile softly at him and even though he can’t see it, he can feel it.

“But dear..” He’s interrupted by a yawn coming from him as he holds onto you. “I.. I need to.” You make a sound in disagreement and no matter how much Kagaya want’s to continue, he knows he can’t without you reading the names out. He squeaks softly when he feels you push his legs up, making his thighs rest beside his head. He knows what’s coming and while he isn’t truly against it, he still wants to keep going. However you don’t let him get a word in because when he opens his mouth to speak, he’s met with a warm tongue. You let his legs fall back against the bed, knowing he couldn’t take that position for long. It was more of a non verbal cue to let him know what you were going to do.

He let out a soft and content sigh when he felt your hands gently caressing his body while undoing his robe. You continue your deep kiss with the man you love most for a while longer, only pulling away when you had managed to completely strip him of all his clothes. He blushed softly, knowing his body was exposed and vulnerable to you. You leaned in and started placing soft and gentle kisses on his neck, making different patterns that mainly consist of hearts. Your hands rub his chest for a bit before you pinch his nipples with care and gentleness. The action elicited a soft moan from the ravenette.

You moved your mouth down, trailing more kisses along the way. Eventually you reached one of his nipples. You take the soft skin in your mouth, playing with the sensitive bud and making Kagaya’s back arch slightly in surprise. He tugged softly at your kimono, too shy to say anything. With a soft chuckle you pull him into another deep kiss while pushing his legs apart.

He felt your fingers slowly push into his hole, making him let out a muffled whimper into your mouth. You savor the sound as it’s not often the two of you indulge in sexual activity, Kagaya often deciding he is too busy. However tonight was one of those nights.

You gently stretch his hole, pressing your fingers against his prostate. Kagaya lets out a soft whimper, his hands moving to hold onto your back. His legs shake slightly, he was always weaker when it came to times like this.

Your fingers draw out moans and whimpers as Kagaya presses himself down on them, trying to fuck himself on your fingers weakly. He let out a soft whine when you pull your fingers from his loosened hole, his mind was too fuzzy to realize you had finished prepping him and were preparing to actually fuck him. He cries out softly when he feels your tip pushing into him and he holds onto you tighter, trying to bury his face in your neck. Soon enough you completely sheath yourself in him, his walls squeeze you tightly as he lets out a moan.

Kagaya’s eyes drift closed no matter how hard he tried to fight his urge to sleep. He let out soft moans and whimpers with every gentle thrust of your hips. He just couldn’t help it, he feels so comfortable and good in your arms. He held weakly onto you still, but his grip was loose.

“Y-y/n…” He whimpered out in a warning, signaling that he was close. You press a gentle kiss to his forehead and roll your hips faster, causing him to let out a louder and longer moan. He just couldn’t help himself, he feels so warm and full and his body needed sleep so desperately. He lets out a soft cry when gets close to orgasming. He’s so so close and he shakily reaches for your face. Naturally you comply and kiss him deeply as ropes of white pearlescent cum shoots from his dick. The stimulation and intense feelings are too much for Kagaya and sleep tugs him away, causing him to pass out in your arms. You smile gently at him and place a final kiss on his forehead before retreating to retrieve a rag to clean your husband with.

[itsyagurlchip]

Hihi! ^w^ saw your requests were open annnd i was wondering if you could do a husk x reader [romantic + established relationship] where reader is his lucky charm. Like he just has such good luck when they’re around him (especially when he’s gambling). Just make it super cute n fluffy :3

☀︎⋆.ೃ࿔*:･The Best Gamble Love Can Give☀︎⋆.ೃ࿔*:･

ᯓᡣ𐭩 warnings: super fluff attack(!) cussing(!) gambling/alcohol addiction(!) wife-coded reader(!)

ᯓᡣ𐭩Guys I swear to God if y'all don't correct my grammar imma find y'all houses and eat your waffle fries/j. This one is super cute anon! Thank you for requesting <33 I want to make some hearts explode with this one. Would you be fine if I made you Husk's spouse? (tehe)

ᯓᡣ𐭩 Even if he didn't win, he still has you. And that's more than luck could ever grant.

ᯓᡣ𐭩 !!For those who don't play, Speed is a game where you have 20 cards to discard, and two discard piles. You have to place down each card (one by one) as fast as you can, in order, and whoever runs out of cards first wins. If there are no more cards to place, you grab from the piles on the sides to continue the game. All while keeping 5 cards in your hand at a time. While you don't need to know this in order to read the story- it will be helpful to know bc I'm not that good at explaining card games.!!

Husk kept on losing, and it was starting to piss him off. Today's redemption exercise was to practice to eliminate the need for gambling; ironically, Husk was chosen to lead the rounds of games. The current game was Speed, with Hellish versions of playing cards.

And he was losing. So. Bad.

Everyone was sitting in the main area, with the usual furniture switched out for tables and chairs. Husk growled, but kept his composure.

"Where's the serenity at, dear Husker? Getting 'chaff' now are we? I guess the cat does lose it's skill, after getting too curious of course." Alastor said, antagonizing him further. Husk banged his fist on the table, making the sinner in front of him jump a bit.

"Fuck!" He grumbles out. The first 5 were won easily, but for some reason these past 30 something games have been no luck.

At first, the goal of the exercise was to play a few games, and quit. You know, to discourage bad behavior but still have fun. But right now, even without a genuine bet, he was setting a bad example. He knows. The sinner in front of him was playing swiftly and skillfully. His wing twitched and he grimaced as his mind stuttered.

But he just had to win. He has to keep going.

Charlie was getting concerned, but he waved her off. Everyone else was finished with their rounds of games, it was time for a new activity. But Husk wasn't gonna allow himself to lose like this.

Not to a damned practice game.

Then you walked next to him. One by one, he rapidly placed down cards in order. His partner did as well, speed was the game afterall. His ear twitched as your heels softly clacked against the floor.

"Hey Husk, baby. You doin' any good?" You said, your voice dripping like honey over his ears. But then he remembered the game. You were worried, Vaggie told you he's been going on like this for hours non-stop. It's almost nighttime.

"Yea, don' worry. Imma win this game in just a minute." He responded, gruffly as he missed the chance to place his ace. He put down a 4 over the five in the second discard pile then. 2 cards left in his deck, but none that followed the order of the discard pile. Fuck.

His partner had 1 card left, probably a king considering the cards that were already placed down.

You kissed his fluffy forehead, relishing in the near silent purr he let out.

"Alright sweetheart, finish up the game so everyone can go to sleep." You fidgeted with his ears in your hands for a bit, before letting go and sitting at the bar.

Watching from afar, you saw that he won. But he wanted to play again. This time though, you didn't allow it. Vaggie saw that you had it handled, so she went up to the elevator. Probably to her room with Charlie, you guessed.

You stood up, walking towards him again with a glass of whiskey, swished with chocolate hints. You placed it in front of him while he was shuffling the cards, not before taking a sip.

The affectionate way it is then.

"Hey, you." You said, slowly rubbing up and down on his fur. You could feel it bristle in shivers before relaxing. Your chin rested on top of his head, lifting a bit to see what he was doing.

"Hey? You just talked to me a few minutes ago." He began to set the cards up, so you pluck them up and stacked them away into a withered box. His wing flapped in annoyance.

"I know," you chuckled. "I just knew you wouldn't last long without a drink. Nothin' too sweet of course." You finished, pushing the drink towards him.

While you couldn't eliminate his addictions, you could switch them for others in small amounts, enough to distract him to bed. You can't fix him, he can only help himself when he chooses to. You both know that.

"You know me too well, Sugarpie." Husk smiled, before talking a gulp of the glass you gave him. Half of it was gone. "No cherry?"

You laughed a bit, placing the box in your pocket to put away later. No one was in the room, no one you could see anyway.

"Naw." You rested your chin back down on his head, wrapping your arms around him neck a bit. "You would just swing it away. No appreciation for its flavor-" You scoffed amusedly at the thought.

He was now distracted away from the cards and now on you, good. You could hear Alastor snicker before walking away.

"Ready to go to bed?"

ᯓᡣ𐭩

In the dark room, you slept. Husk didn't.

He was wide awake, in a way that still made him feel tired, but not sleep. On his back, he looked up at the ceiling in mindless thought.

Husk didn't mind though, as long as it didn't affect your sleep. He looked at you. Your breaths were soft, and slow. His eyes dilated, though one could never really prove it.

Grabbing onto your waist, he cuddles into your side just a bit more, and relaxes with a deep sigh.

You, in your half asleep state, reach for him. In which you succeed, running your fingers through the tuffs of his ears in an unknown rhythm. Husk purred freely now, he loved it when this happened.

How lucky was he, of all people in this shitty hell, to still have his wife in the afterlife? Sure, you may not have done great things, but he was afraid that the two of you would forever be separated by heaven.

How lucky was he, in all of his shitty problems and mental shit, to be able to still have you around? To have you want him around?

That thought had brought a soft smile to his face. In all of his gambles, this was the best one he's ever made.

I think I remember who asked this, but then again I'm answering this one late. soooo, if I tag you incorrectly I'm so sorry (@kltira )

I think imma call this place the "debriefing space" bc I always wanna ramble, but I'm never sure where. Also, so people won't have to read this before the oneshot/fic. Nothing here will be specific, maybe things I'm thinking while writing, or things that I sorta wanna discuss.

Rather than being a lucky charm, I was thinking reader to be more of a saving grace for Husk. Which he already finds lucky enough. While you are motivation to win, it doesn't always secure his place for it.

I know this trope is kinds overused, but you and Husk were married during life (yippee!!). You guys are just two old people who want to spend time with each other lmao. I sorta headcannon that when he starts to get too into his addiction, you kind of save him (BUT NOT FROM ALASTOR LMAO/hj) and that was one of the reasons why he married you. Not only to keep himself in control, but to see you guys thrive together <33

you are quite literally his only silence from this hellhole.

{Can we just talk about how when Angel Dust nonconsensually touches Husk ppl call it "cute" and "aww", but when Valentino nonconsensually touches Angel it's now bad? likkke. we love the show but we gotta get some new writers for season 2 and fans who don't mischaracterize everything they see.

I'm now only really starting to think about this- and the double standard is starting to be more noticeable to me. Like when Sir Pentious was saying "no" but those demons still dragged him into the sex room. But that scene was used for entertainment rather than "Hey this is a serious moment" like Valentino was.

I'm all for HuskerDust, but you gotta realize when a character does something bad and does nothing to redeem from it, no matter if they're a part of the main cast or not. (isn't that what the show is supposed to be about- redemption? y'all do understand how destructive this behavior is and how it can easily make HuskerDust toxic right?). }

we need the option for another 'keep reading' thingy bc I talk too much. ignore my yapping.

૮₍˶• .•⑅₎ა tags: @kittykittyanon @bonefanatic @oleander-nin @towomatos @thealphagirl

૮₍˶• .•⑅₎ა@ziipzeepzop-eez @wheezdostuff @spongejuice @cyb3r-st4r @matteo-hamato

@clown-froggi

if you would like to be added, check my blog. if you would like to be added, check my blog. SEE? I SAID IT TWICE!!

[blossoms-phan]

Hi! I am a X escapee relatively recent Dan & Phil returnee who loves your posts, you seem so reasonable. I have just been given what felt like a 90 min presentation detailing how my innocent assumption that Dan and Phil were anything other than platonic housemates was incorrect and offensive.

The lecture i was given included every reference that highlighted, amongst other things: their "obvious" separate bedrooms, bathrooms, towels, angles of items shown in bedrooms, closets, mentions of wanting to go out and meet other men, lack of real concern (X words, not mine) at each others medical emergencies and every use of bro and friend that they have said post hiatus. It was very detailed, they were very insistent and I was very apologetic. I decided to flee the X hostility and head back to tumblr, but here everyone appears to think they are together. So now I am confused and don't want to offend a whole new group of people.

I think what set the X people off was i said "partner" as I was under the, I now know, incorrect impression that they went public years ago. Oops. Don't trust the internet is what I have learned from this. I thought all this drama would have died out long ago, but I assume this is a topic to stay far away from still? Thanks

hi anon! first of all, thank you for saying that (still can’t believe I’ve garnered enough attention on here that people specifically like my posts!), I really appreciate it. second of all imma be so real with you I am a person that still primarily refers to “X” as twitter bc I refuse to get with the times so this greatly confused me until I realized there was only one possible platform with those kind of people you could be talking about. i’m sorry you endured that exhausting sounding lecture and welcome you to phannie tumblr with open arms 🫶

i am here to gently reassure you that you can take what dnp say and do and show and form your own opinions about it, don’t let anyone tell you you’re right or wrong for drawing conclusions or making assumptions. however I will also be so bold and tell you why that individual is so blatantly wrong and maybe clear some of your confusion.

first of all, i think dnp would refer to themselves as anything but "platonic housemates." it all comes back to this but i dare someone to look me in the eyes and be so fr when saying that just because they've never stated in words "we're dating/boyfriends/partners etc" the simple fact that they share a mortgage on a "forever home" together, (according to them) spend literally all their time together, are partners in work/life/play (vacations), share families (dan being uncle to phil's niece) implies anything other than them being life partners. i'd also like to draw attention back to possibly the most blatantly open statement either of them has made about the nature of their relationship, in dan's video titled "basically i'm gay" where he describes them as "actual soulmates" and more. there are lots of people who have been discussing/answering posts about the concept of a "hard launch" recently which i could direct you to and i am of the mind that there's nothing wrong with conceptualizing the idea of a hard launch or them being more open to sharing details of their romantic relationship to an extent, but BIG is the most profound public statement of the nature of their relationship and, in my humble opinion, "the" hard launch as dan QUITE LITERALLY says "more than just romantic" and goes on to say he and phil are private people and that that's all he will say of it for now (keep in mind it's been 5 years since this statement- still relevant but minds can change, specifically theirs in terms of what they feel more comfortable and open sharing in a post-comeback world)

now moving on to the "references" you mentioned. again, highlighting literally any of this as "proof" that they are just friends or whatever is utterly ridiculous but i'll still go through it for funsies. i'd like to challenge this person that claims they have "obvious" seperate bedrooms by saying... what is so obvious about it?? dnp are highly aware that whatever they share with us will be analyzed or viewed under a microscope, so obviously they've carefully chosen which parts of the phouse to show us and they're not going to be like oh yeah this is OUR bedroom where we sleep TOGETHER every night. now i'm aware that yes, the "black" bedroom with dan's closet is more obviously a dan room that has been claimed as "his" bedroom. can't find it to link rn but they have posted a photo of the shelf of that room and while it is mostly dan stuff on the shelves, there was also a photo of phil's family and some of phil's books and items on the shelves. storage? sure, but if someone wants to claim that makes it so obviously dan's room then i can say that having phil's stuff in there could also point to them sharing the space. the room that phil films amazingphil videos in has been called a guest room/bed by them both, and in terms of rooms we've seen that just leaves the green room. imho everything points towards this being another guest room/possibly a room for family specifically to stay when they come- iirc nothing has been said to claim this as phil's room other than the fact that there is a painting by his dad and he occasionally films in there. i'm not going to pretend to know the ins and outs of their sleeping arrangements, but i think for two adults that own a huge house together and spend a lot of time together and have a lot of their own things it's perfectly reasonable to have "separate" bedrooms, multiple bathrooms/their own towels (?? i don't get this one i assume they're referring to the part of the golden pig video but like. obviously they have their own towels wtf lmao) and utter those things more on camera and then sleep together/share spaces in their own time.

once again, dan and phil know what they're doing. they are in control of what they show and share. calling each other "bro" and "friend" is an intentional choice and very much second nature at this point after doing it on camera for years. also it's not wrong or implies that they aren't romantic- i am of the opinion that they are friends first and they know that too. however, in a post-hiatus/comeback world, it almost feels pointed at this point. like a joke. a wink wink, nudge nudge, look-to-camera "we know you know" thing that they're keeping going just because they can.

in terms of the "going out and meeting other men" bit i assume they refer to jokes made by dan in the wad era? again, i'm not going to dive deep into this but dan is a comedian and post-coming out, wad and those other shows were the first time in his life he was able to be openly, unapologetically gay and himself and i think he was allowed to make a few grindr jokes for the fun of it. if dan values privacy in terms of his personal life, i highly doubt he would go around telling everyone he was hooking up with dudes- these are jokes plain and simple. but if you're interested @freckliedan has a wonderful post about dnp and the concept of monogamy/them sleeping with other people that i don't entirely disagree with and that is worded much better than i ever could so. i'd also like to talk to this person bc in what fucking world have they EVER shown a "lack of concern" at each others medical emergencies????? this is possibly the most baffling claim out of all of these to me. dan could not have made it more clear how scared/worried/traumatized he was by phil literally almost dying recently, and there have been more instances than i can count of him just being there for phil during all of his more recent health issues/scares. if this is referring to the eye incident, again i'm not going to pretend i know all the ins and outs of their relationship bc i don't- we know what they tell us. literally everything about this they said in a joking way, i don't know why people got their panties in a bunch- phil sending dan alone doesn't mean he doesn't care about him or anything, i honestly don't think he wouldn't have been much help going and i think they both kind of knew this, they were just playing it up to be a funny anecdote because they're entertainers. it's what they do. they've been making stories out of their lives for 15 years.

this is getting far too long and rambley as i don't know how to rein in my yapping when responding to asks but. i promise you're fine. discussing their relationship isn't "drama" or some forbidden thing, it happens on here a lot actually. except you will find most people on here use critical thinking and what dan and phil knowingly share with us, as adults with brains, to draw conclusions about their relationship based on everything from the way they look at each other to the little ways they tell us they care about and love each other bc they do. and that's not something they shy from now. come join us! don't let people tell you you're wrong for thinking they're partners bc in the nicest way possible, they literally are (if you want to sugarcoat it and say life partners instead of romantic go ahead bc they've literally described themselves as companions through life which is a more poetic way of saying partners imo) and respectfully anyone who thinks otherwise is in denial at this point

[canisbrutus]

Hey I really like your headcanons !!! What’s your view on the main three’s relationship with each other?

why thank ya, color me flattered lol. let me see.. this will be Long

Gary & Jimmy 🐍🐕

tragic doomed toxic yaoi etc etc

ultimately they're two sides of the same coin, opposite eachother in a way. both are simultaneously victims and perpetrators, though they differ in motive and response

while jimmy might be too daft to realize, gary knows this and absolutely hates it.

like a fine mix of admiration jealousy and spite

jimmy meanwhile is just fed up his bullshit

but at the same time he doesnt *hate* him.

jimmy doesnt really hate anyone tbh hes just easily pissed off

after the betrayal jimmy is annoyed at best and personally hurt at worst. but he can shrug it off with ease. he doesnt hold grudges

which is yet another thing that drives gary nuts

before the betrayal though. jimmy made gary feel Weird. jimmy's too genuine. too upfront. too honest. Too Real.

he took their friendship seriously. very very few people willingly stood beside gary, minus petey who we'll get to later

and that made him ? scared. confused even. absolutely nobody could be equal with him. even if he liked their relationship

anyway. this vvv

Petey & Gary 🐇🐍

petey primarily hung around gary because he was familiar and it was better than being alone, yes.

but also, these two go back a fair ways. like elementary.

as such, petey knows more about gary than he would like him to.

gary has been through a Lot. he's also Lost a Lot.

petey is one of the few 'things' he has left that really means anything to him.

or. he was, anyway. before the betrayal

shortly after the fight in the pit he got in an argument with gary. cut him deep where it hurts. mentioned something he maybe shouldnt have.

got beaten bloody and thrown away. and gary devolved from there.

despite this petey doesnt really hold it against him either

there's some guilt to him. perhaps a bit of self loathing.

but he couldnt approach gary on his own. his nerves were too shot.

sure gary threw his friend jimmy to russell. and sure gary's been picking on him for years at this point. but to beat the shit out of him, his best friend, after he's stayed with him for just about a decade?

he couldnt trust him again

he hardly trusted him to begin with honestly, gary had been beating him down and making sure he knew whatever prior cuts he made at him didnt hurt in the slightest before.

thankfully jimmy isnt as sensitive as he is.

~~~~~

Jimmy & Petey 🐕🐇

poor kids. two peas in a pod thrown under the bus

petey may have been apprehensive of jimmy at first, due to his general attitude and knack for mayhem.

but as time passed jimmy showed his true colors and proved to be a Good person (if prone to manipulation)

it wasnt long before petey started to trust him more than gary. and after the betrayal, jimmy was all he really had.

(admittedly he did try to join the nerds but earnest called him a faggot and said no)

petey isnt meek. he isn't soft. his venom is often dwarfed by everyone else's, but he still holds a rage. even if he keeps it inside. part of him did want to get back at gary. but another part still felt concern for his old friend spiraling like mad. even moreso considering he pushed him the way he did, with that argument mentioned.

im saying this ^ bc he felt an obligation to advise jimmy on what to do, especially regarding gary. hoping he could get him calmed tf down so they could go back to normal, as friends, again.

but they werent particularly close. kinda like business partners. jimmy blowing him off half the time didnt help matters.

but again. petey didnt have anyone else.

just a poor guy caught in the middle of their homoerotic rivalry

~~~~~

i have so many lores for these stupid cunts.

anyway reminder that my inbox is open for requests in general. woof

[hc masterpost link]

[fourphoenixfeathers]

Tags from @hotmothsummer

ASK AND YOU SHALL RECEIVE. I'm still very much cooking but I'll write down what I'm thinking so far.

I love these two so much. It's absolutely insane how the two bots least likely to trust anyone became partners, and while the show wouldn't upset the status quo so majorly, I really wanted to see Auto Berserk go a different way.

So Starscream is sick of Megatron's scrap, and getting abandoned on the battlefield was the last straw. Red Alert is on a hair trigger and thinks the autobots are going to take him apart for scraps. Starscream spots an opportunity!

He pulls Red Alert aside to hide him from the autobots and start his plotting and scheming. It's them two against the world now, and if they can get the negavator, no one will be able to stop them anymore. Starscream wants to finally be on top (but secretly he just wants to finally be safe) and Red Alert wants the security (even though his personality will always find something to be paranoid about). They need therapy your honor.

Starscream is in a pretty good place here! Red Alert isn't hard to manipulate, all Starscream has to do is play into his fears. It's free partner (but watch out)!

I have this vivid image in my head of Red Alert jumping at the slightest of sounds, interpreting anything and everything as a threat to him and his new partner. On one hand, it's kind of annoying to keep talking him down from a false alarm, but on the other... Starscream never had anyone by his side before who was so genuinely concerned for his safety. He's always had to look out for number one because no one else would. Skyfire was the only one who would, but even after he was found in the ice, that didn't last long. Uh oh, he's getting attached.

On Red Alert 's end, he's getting to see a completely different side of Starscream. The flaky SIC gets so much scrap for his cowardice and general gremlin behavior (not to mention how the autobots literally joke about the Megatron domestic abuse), but without the autobots or the decepticons around, Starscream is surprisingly competent. It'll definitely give him something to think about when his logic circuits aren't buzzing like bees on crack.

Then they capture the negavator. All the factions and the two defectors are in one high stakes fight. Red Alert's not doing too hot, Starscream wants to make sure he doesn't leave him for rejoin the autobots without stressing him out so much he explodes, and then Megatron chooses this moment to come in like the kool aid man.

It comes down to this: claim he was getting the weapon for Megatron... Or stick with Red Alert. The answer is obvious isn't it? Megatron will kill him if he doesn't get into his good graces immediately. But Starscream hesitates. The reason he got into this mess was that Megatron left him for dead even when he wasn't being actively traitorous. He's alive as long as he is useful, and even that isn't a guarantee. But for all his paranoia, Red never threatened Starscream's life.

Red Alert sees Starscream's hesitation, and for a moment he fears Starscream will betray him. He should have known not to trust the Decepticon notorious for his treachery. But Starscream instead calls for a tactical retreat for the defectors.

I'm a bit fuzzy on what happens next, but the gist of it is Starscream chose Red Alert over Megatron, and Red returns the favor. They are besties, do not separate. On one hand, I want Screamy to have more defector vacation bc there's no way he'd drop everything and join the autobots so easily. But at the same time, using his null ray to calm down Red Alert's overactive circuits is a temporary measure, and Red will have to get medical attention sooner or later, and when he does he will return to his own faction.

They are so star crossed. They worked so well together when they both acted as neutrals (ignoring the gaslighting. Shhhh it's my sandbox now I do what I want) but that can't last and it's 😭😭😭🥺🥺🥺. Unless Starscream gets his head out of his tailpipe. Hence, I'm grabbing him by the throat and shoving him in the redemption bin. Somehow.

[depressopax]

hiii! im not sure if you write for gus (brba/bcs) but if you do, could i request a few headcanons (sfw or nsfw) of him with a gender neutral partner if possible :0 maybe qualities he finds attractive/would like in a partner, physically or personality wise or whatever you have in mind:] tysm ! i hope youre having a good one ♡

Tysm for the request!! <3 I made it into some relationship headcanons but tried mentioning what he likes in a partner etc… It may have turned out a bit dark lol, sorry ‘bout that 😭 Anywaysss hope ya like it! Have a good day anon!! 🫶

Gus Fring relationship headcanons

Fandom - Breaking Bad/Better call Saul

Gus x gn!reader - (N)SFW headcanons

Pairing: Gus Fring x gender-neutral reader Genre: Fluff, smut, (kinda angst too??), headcanons Warning(s): Slightly possessive Gus, cuss words. Sexual content (marked further down as “NSFW”, MDNI! Dom/sub dynamic, degradation. Words: 1.4k Summary: Being in a relationship with Gus Fring would include…  English is not my main language, if I make any spelling mistakes please let me know so I can improve my writing! <3 || AO3 link || Masterlist || Request ||

SFW

First time Gus saw you was at Los Pollos Hermanos.

You were there with some friends and you immediately caught his eye.

Maybe it was your smile, your eyes or the way you talked to your friends that made his heart skip a beat

That, or the fact you and him made eye contact at least 4 times. 

But because of his dangerous life and past relationship traumas, he let you slip through his fingers, to not drag you into his chaos.

Or so he thought at least.

Truth is, you felt a spark, too. There was something dangerous about him, but also something charming.

Curious as you were, you went to LPH more often, hoping to catch a glimpse of the mysterious man - eventually learning he’s the manager. 

Gus of course noticed you being there more often. Ignoring you got harder.

One day you decided to shoot your shot - the same day he decided to strike a conversation with you. 

You learned his name is Gustavo Fring.

There was something about his smile and way of talking that charmed you.

But he also seemed very reserved and troubled. He seemed afraid to answer your flirting and got really flustered from it.

Just as you were about to give up your flirting attempts, he surprised you by asking you out on a date.

Of course, you said yes.

Gus enjoys good food and luxury, so it was no surprise he took you to a 5-star restaurant for the first date - his treat.

Not having been on a “real date” in over a decade, Gus was a nervous wreck lmao

Luckily he is good at handling stress. You barely noticed the emotions he kept under the surface. 

The date went really well. Gus is a good listener and listened to you in a way that was rare.

Even when you got a bit too nerdy about your interests, he listened with a smile. 

 But it did make you a bit concerned when he dodged questions about his own personal life. 

He realized himself how weird that must've come across, getting anxious that you wouldn’t contact him again.

Luckily, you did. 

Gus kept taking you on dates. 

The more he got to know you, the harder he fell in love. 

Actually - he figured he was in love already after the first kiss. 

Once getting clarity in what he felt, he knew what he had to do - Telling you the truth about who he is.

The fear of losing you was big. 

…But the fear of you staying, becoming part of his dangers - was bigger.

He explained to you how he had fallen in love with you, before dropping the bomb.

You were shocked, of course. 

After some days of thinking about what he’d told you, you made a decision.

Upon telling him; Gus felt a wave of emotions: Confusion, happiness, relief but also anxiety. But he put all that aside. 

Gus officially became your boyfriend and you couldn’t be more happy - neither could he.

All dangers aside - Gus does everything to be “boyfriend material” lol

His love language is touch, and words of affirmation.

He doesn’t let a day go by without telling you how much he loves you. 

He always wants you close - just holding your hand makes him feel good. 

He also likes spoiling you - expensive gifts, homemade dinners, road trips with him etc… 

He basically spends all his spare-time with you.

You spend a lot of time in his house, with or without him.

He has money, enough to provide you safety. 

Because of his enemies, and dangerous life, Gus gets very overprotective and a bit possessive.

Ngl he’d probably hire a bodyguard for you whenever you are away in another town with friends/family 😭 Or ask Mike to keep an eye on you lol

He’d be too paranoid to openly be in a relationship with you - but tell a few people he really trusted. If he could, he’d tell the whole world tho. He loves you and it frustrates him to not be able to tell people.

Gus is very good at reading people, so he often can see if something is wrong.

He’s a good listener and tries to always see things from your POV

He rarely gets mad at you either. 

Most of the time he’s calm and understanding.

He tries to always be there for you, if not with advice, at least with support and to offer you comfort. 

He also gives really good hugs 😌✨

Same goes for your interests/hobbies. He learns for example how to crochet, paint or whatever so you can make it a date.

He’ll let you talk about things you like for hours

Gus is not the type of person that likes indoor activities. Of course he appreciates movie nights, but I feel like he enjoys spending time outdoors.

Going hiking, walks in the forest, sightseeing etc etc

Weather doesn’t really matter to him. He’s def one of those that tells you to “Dress depending on the weather 🤪🤪” 

He enjoys cooking food for you, but also with you.

He’ll teach you some old family recipes 

When eating, he lits candles and makes it cozy so it feels like a restaurant. 

Gus appreciates movie nights too. Snacks, wine and cuddles whilst watching something.

Gus is cheesy in the way of envisioning his future with you.

He knows that one day, he wants to marry you.

As for starting a family, he’d like that - if you want to have kids too, ofc.

Otherwise he’ll just be happy to marry you and always have you by his side.

To summarize: Gus is very overprotective when it comes to you, but his criminal lifestyle aside - he loves you deeply and a relationship with him would be passionate.

NSFW

I feel like he’s definitely a dom

But more of a soft dom.

He’s on top, always. Convincing him otherwise is not easy.

He can get pretty rough, but would never hurt you or make you uncomfortable.

His sex drive isn’t that high, but he makes an exception for you.

Besides, you just happen to turn him on a lot 🤭

He prefers to do it at home and in bed

However… If you happen to tease him when in public, he’ll find a private spot and just take you there. “You couldn’t wait until we got home? Pathetic” …As he thrusts into you and muffles your moans with his palm

He prefers to take you at a fast pace, one that’ll leave you breathless.

He has a lot of pent up frustrations and releases all tension in the bedroom. 

He’ll have you laying under him, pinning your wrist over your head as he makes you into a moaning mess.

He has a lot of stamina and can go at it for hours.

If he’s feeling rude, he’ll have you beg for him and/or plead for him to slow down to give you a break.

Only for him to laugh and tease you for it “My poor baby… Look at me.” “I’m not done with you just yet.” “Be good for me, my love.”

When it comes to you, he likes both praising and degrading you - doing so equally.

He’ll have sweet nicknames for you as well as insulting ones.

After sex, you’ll be covered in hickeys, which he’ll praise you for.

He prefers giving oral, merely because he’s in full control of your pleasure. 

When going down on you, he’s a tease.

He’ll have you begging for him to use his mouth on you.

And he knows how to do it, too.

Gus likes using his hands too, to stimulate your area or other body parts.

He’ll grab your hips, thighs etc roughly, hard enough to leave marks.

When receiving, he likes being in control too.

He’ll hold your head still and move his hips to his own liking.

Gus prioritizes aftercare. He wouldn’t go to sleep without being reassured you’re ok after a rough session.

He’ll clean you and the bed up, run a bath for you, cuddle, give massage etc

Although he can be meanie during sex, he gives affection, praise and love afterwards, putting the dominant act away. 

He falls asleep after you. 

Since he’s rough in bed, you often end up falling asleep faster than usual - especially when he hugs you lovingly too. 

He likes seeing your sleeping figure and falling asleep knowing that you’re all his… 

[ooc-themis-cattails]

Can I just say how much I appreciate the diversity of ace identities in ISAT and all the detail about it?

(spoilers ahoy)

I love how at first Sif sees the porn scroll as "people doing fun things" but later admits it doesn't interest them at all. Their first response is to say what they know they're "supposed" to think it is, what everyone else is probably going to think it is. But then they learn that it's really ok to admit that they're not into it.

At first Sif is like "why does Beau like me?" but after a while they start to find him cute because they understand the emotion behind his feelings, and while they're not sure if they can actually take it as far as a sexual relationship, they're interested in figuring it out, because for them, that doesn't gross them out, it's just not a drive. This is so relatable to me and I love seeing it bc it's not the typical ace in fiction where like, this character is ace so we mustn't put them in a ship because we should assume it'd gross them out. Sif can be ace but not entirely horrified by sex, and Sif may be romantic (I don't know if even Sif knows whether they are romantic or not)-- I suspect they are demiromantic because it's the intimacy and familiarity of Beau's emotions that makes them start to feel things about the moment by the tree, to the point where they miss it when he doesn't try.

Mirabelle going through the dating service papers is the most wonderful scene because this is what it was like to be ace when I was in my early twenties. Most people didn't know it was a thing, and friends/family were very helpfully concerned that you should find a partner in order to not be alone, because the theory was that it was a basic human need for everyone. I did exactly what Mirabelle did, and had the same kind of reaction: "I have to pick one of these people to try dating because I have to figure out how to be sexually interested in someone so that I can do the whole partnership thing that everyone says you need to do in order to have a fulfilling adult life." Looking at pictures of people trying to figure out how to be attracted to them, or what you like, when the answer is really that you're just Not. And you're kind of torn because some part of you knows that this isn't going to work, but the other part of you legit believes that it's like staying hydrated, you have to do it for your own good even if you're not thirsty.

Mirabelle's being into fictional romance and shipping, just not into doing it herself, is also such a good detail. I'm not aro so I can't speak to that myself, but still, it's a thing. She's emotionally invested in the dynamics between people, she loves watching the details of how they play out, and that's completely separate from ever wanting to do it herself. I've seen it in others and I definitely get that from the perspective of an ace person reading smut-- you can very much enjoy a dynamic without wanting to BE in the dynamic yourself.

Sif coming to understand how attraction works from the outside: "Wait, you can't choose who you get a crush on? That explains so much!" The line made me wince because it's so self-deprecating-- they're probably thinking they're not good enough for Beau-- but I also very much appreciate the realism of how... nobody explains to you how attraction works because they assume you know what it's like, and you probably don't ask because it's embarrassing if they assume that you're an immature late bloomer with no experience of the world, rather than someone who will never have a libido no matter what they've seen. It's so easy to feel infantilized or to infantilize yourself if you're not comfortable with your ace identity. Both Mirabelle and Sif are young enough that they struggle a bit with whether this is really their identity or whether they've just not figured it out yet. In reality, at their age, this probably IS who they are. But they're also a bit hesitant to rule it out because it's really hard to know that you are NOT something, and (given that Mirabelle hadn't really considered the possibility that she's aroace) the culture doesn't seem to have a lot of representation or support for the idea. It's obvious to the player, well, if this is how they feel, then they're ace! But neither one of them can quite settle on that for sure. Because, unlike being attracted to someone where you can go "well that sure did happen", being not attracted to someone is a nonproof. So Mirabelle keeps trying, and Sif doesn't know that their reaction will seem valid to others (as evidenced by the change in how they describe the scroll). Odile, who is aro and who seems to be not entirely ace but isn't exactly the thirstiest plant in the garden, has a different position. She seems to pretty much know where she's at, which makes sense for her age, but we can't really tell if she's always been okay with it or if it's been an issue. We don't know if Ka Bu is a more uptight culture, or how long society has been normalizing non-hetero identities, but we do know she had no female role models, so if any of this heteronormative business was an issue, I imagine it contributed a lot to her feeling of outsiderness. I'd love to know more about how Odile's sexuality impacted her life but she's obviously not about to infodump it on a bunch of 20 year olds, so it remains a mystery. Nonetheless it's pretty great that there's an older aro character, illustrating that people have always been this way, it's just easier for young people to discover it now because they feel more allowed to not be heterosexual. [eta: @butterflyknifepoisoning reminded me that I've misremembered this and Odile isn't actually aro, she's had hatecrushes before and explained them to Mirabelle. Which I kind of sort of remember now! Not sure why I thought she was aro, my memory is crap sometimes. It's still a far cry from yamato nadeshiko, but yeah. Point taken]

...In the end, I find it extremely refreshing that there's a whole RPG party here and only ONE of them experiences sexual attraction, and it's a flamboyant gay-seeming dude with a poorly-kept-secret crush on an enby they/he. ISAT is so cool, it's the best aroace representation I have seen in fiction so far ever.

[theinfinitedivides]

it's telling how some people who were in denial that assad's snub/exclusion from marketing had anything to do with racism and Islamophobia (throwing all kinds of insults for months that we're being delusional, that w'ere doomposting) are also lamenting how the awards nominations are now "pitting jacob and sam against each other". their outrage feels performative as hell, when they act more concerned with "homophobic amc" splitting up their imaginary rpf ship rather than understanding that racism is the reason a white man was propped up at the expense of the main POC who had the most screentime this season. i'm actually annoyed that fans were even trying to write rpf fix it fic of jacob comforting poor sam at the awards ceremony??? (is That what they focused on from this controversy?), it's so obvious they treat this jacob like an accessory to his white coworker.

they don't get to pretend that amc wasn't being racist and islamophobic when they threw assad under the bus.... only to evoke jacob's name when they're mad that he should have been nominated alongside sam, as if this season wasn't carried by jacob, delainey and assad. there's no excuse for why sam is repeatedly promoted over one or two of them, or all three of them. i'm sick and tired of not only amc but also all these fandom hypocrites.

anon came in my inbox so hot i had to check to see where the fire was before i burned myself, goddamn. had to let this one sit and cook. let it marinate. let it fucking soak up all that juicy shit and then serve and eat bc truly what else is there to say? what else can i say about this that hasn't already been said in better ways with more evidence. what the fuck. i will never forget accidently ending up on that side of the fandom where they're convinced that 1. JA is not straight (ok. fair. their prerogative. i have my list of celebrities who are assigned bi until further notice. i function with the baseline that people in general are assigned bi until further notice i just don't put that on the internet all the time) and 2. he married his wife as a beard and he and Sam are dating BTS—look, i have no problem with RPF. live and let live peace and love on planet earth etc etc i am an RPF warrior but that right there? that's some scary scary shit. 'if Sam wins at the awards Jacob is going to be there and they're going to hold hands on the red carpet and—' stop. the levels of presumption and delusion and tokenism can only go so far, you do not see me saying Eric and Jo Anne are going to pull up to their next event together with Assad hanging off their arm as their third and believing it with my whole chest. that's for the great fic writers of Zamasian to solve not me to invent wholecloth as fact

heading back to the point from that quick detour (aka understanding that racism is the reason a white man was propped up at the expense of the main POC who had the most screentime this season, as you said)—honestly we need to send the Jassad-Delainey crew some fucking ice packs bc i know. i know their backs hurt from carrying s2. i know they still do. i'm talking spa treatments getaways salary raises whatever they need bc they are continuously overlooked by the people and outlets propping up the white man who was barely here and they're still giving 1000%. in fact you want to talk about white men that should have been propped up on the side in terms of screentime let's talk Ben Daniels. hit after hit after hit as scum of the earth Santiago (and he put the Iago in his name. he was on his Othello shit) and no submissions. none. now granted i know he's been going through a period of grief after the loss of his partner + he was technically a guest star so maybe he asked not to be submitted. maybe they decided not to regardless. my point is you had Santiago giving more depth and dialogue and just *motions* everything than Dreamstat hanging around to be Louis' glorified inner critic and manifestation of his intrusive thoughts. the writing was on the wall from the minute we saw how they were treating Assad this time around the awards we were the canary in the coalmine telling you that Jacob and Delainey could be next bc of pisspoor promotion and what did we get? accusations of anti-Blackness and taking away appreciation for their success so no. you don't get to use them to hide behind your bitchass behavior Jacob especially. you're the same type of people who pulled up like some freaks and said that Armand should get back with his maker or get assaulted in s3 just to spite the fans blowing the whistle do not let his initials even touch the inside of your mouth

and the Islamophobia........................ hoo boy. Assad has been unapologetically open about his upbringing and religious background for years. he's said that he talked with Rolin about his thought process and approach to this multi-faceted role he knows what he brings to the table in this starvation economy and we thank him for it. AMC isn't thanking him for it when they choose to use his scenes as social media promo without acknowledging it in the FYC rounds and the fandom certainly isn't thanking him every time some shit comes up and people turn a blind eye. hey. newsflash. you want to not be a racist dick you have to not be a racist dick to anybody. you can't handpick a few of our Black siblings and be like see i'm not racist and then turn around and act like our South Asian siblings are talking out of their ass when they bring up the kind of stereotypical rhetoric that has been used in this fandom to talk about Armand. i ain't even telling y'all to like Armand i'm telling y'all to stop reverting to the vilest shit possible to say since you don't, just like some of you Lestat fans will take every opportunity to make Louis look like the aggressor and abuser in that relationship. fuck that

see now. i said what else is there to say but anon you got me fired up you see how long this is. awa. anyway i'm a strong believer in if you put that kind of energy out it is going to come back. by hook or by crook by God or the universe or your own motherfucking actions Crapaud going to come and pull up in your driveway and smoke your pipe. choke you choking there on the fumes. who doesn't hear will feel rope long but you hanging eventually wi

[mantequillamcwhoremick]

Is there a both option? I mean the question is how far would Cartman go and risk alienating Kenny and I think the answer is quite a lot and the track record really shows that he can get away with basically anything and not get disavowed from the friend group 🤔 so there isn’t really a disincentive to not try to break them up, especially if he thinks they will eventually get over it and return to status quo.

Though on the other hand I do think it could go the route where depending on what lengths he goes to…while it might not permanently sour any relationship Cartman has with the two boy separately, but I couldn’t say the same with complete confidence for the Kenny and Butters connection. I think if any dysfunction starts interfering with Cartman’s schemes, he might get fed up and try to fix it somewhat 🤔 Although somewhat as a side note though he already spews vitriolic hate speech and slurs, I would have a hard time believing he wouldn’t find some way to take advantage of the Bunny relationship and be more embolden to start saying even darker more heinous stuff because he believes he would receive less push back as *insert sound bite “How can I be homophobic my b*tch is gay🎶” *

(In reference to this poll)

True, Cartman would definitely take advantage of his friends being in a gay relationship to get out of any accusations of homophobia just to spew even more homophobic crap, but while Kenny is arguably closest to him out of the main 4, I kinda feel like he doesn't need KENNY to be the friend he takes advantage of bc of this. He would just as much say this about Stan and Kyle (even if they aren't even together lmao) and he is pretty much canonically 1000% on board with THEM being in a gay relationship (see "Cupid Me" and "Guitar Queero").

Some people reblogged the poll with some interesting takes, and I gotta say what convinced me the most is the fact that Cartman just kinda has it out for Butters at all times lmao. I'm convinced he would think that Kenny can do better, and especially if Kenny started calling Cartman out on how he treats Butters, he'd think Butters is "corrupting" Kenny and trying to ruin his and Kenny's BFF-ship.

The way he reacted in concern about Kenny's girlfriend being a slut who would just "throw his heart in his face" in the episode "The Ring" has me convinced, that Cartman somewhat weirdly cares about Kenny's relationships, and not just in a self-serving way. This isn't in an attempt to alienate Kenny, but rather alienate the potential partner, and we've seen a LOT of instances in which Cartman does not have any qualms about painting Butters as the bad guy and/or someone to be made fun of.

As much as I'd love to advocate for some kind of compassion Cartman could express for Butters, their friendship is just not built on that. Butters and Cartman get along well enough, but only as long as Butters goes along with everything Cartman says. Once he goes against it, Cartman either goes LIVID or completely dismisses/invalidates his concerns. Some good episode where you can conclude this, are "Let Them Eat Goo", "The Death of Eric Cartman", "DikinBaus Hotdogs", "Poor and Stupid", "The Magic Bush", "Tegridy Farms", "Super Fun Time" and about a hundred more, but when I think of Butters & Cartman's friendship these are the ones that first come to mind.

The only instances where he kind of seems to care about Butters' distress in small ways are in "The Magic Bush" and briefly in "Super Fun Time", but it's not significant enough to qualify for the genuine respect I see him show Kenny (or even Stan). I can write a whole essay about the nuance of Cartman and Butters' friendship, but that's for some other time. In short: Cartman really likes having Butters do whatever he says, and Butters doesn't even need to do anything particularly defiant for Cartman to start putting him down (ex. the ending of the "The Death of Eric Cartman" episode.) If Kenny, who is Cartman's weird soft spot, started going against Cartman in favor of Butters, whose established dynamic with Cartman completely benefits him, I can imagine that this would rub Cartman the wrong way.

I could be convinced though, that once Cartman realizes how sad it made Kenny, if (thanks to one of Cartman's schemes) his and Butters' relationship were to not work out, Cartman would begrudgingly take some kind of pity on Kenny (and maybe even Butters) and recognize that being together is what makes them both happy. He then would do another scheme that gets them back together, and "Smug Alert"-esque not want them to know that it's thanks to him hahahh

So yeah, it could be kind of "both", but, in my humble opinion, only AFTER Cartman damages their relationship almost beyond repair in an attempt to keep them apart. Which is why I, personally, would still go for the "manipulative-anti-matchmaker" option. But I purposely didn't add a "both" option bc most people would go for that without thinking it over too much lmao

Thank you so much for the ask anon, sorry for taking so long to respond but you truly made me think about this a lot ahaha this kinda turned into an analysis of the trio more than an answer to your ask, I hope you don't mind. You made my braincells fire off

[wonuwrites]

Hiiiii 💖 I love your writing! I have a suggestion. Wonwoo and y/n at dinner with the members. Both are lightweights and both get a little tipsy. The members either coo, roll their eyes, or do their best to help while they take care of drunk shy Wonwoo who is taking care of drunk shy y/n. You can do it with another member if you like (Wonu's my bias right now and I don't think he drinks as much as the others). Anyway no pressure, thank you! love, @mykpopficblog

DRUNK WONU MAKES BRAIN GO BRRR I'M SO EXCITED FOR THIS~~~ also thank you so much for the request and compliment <33 it means a lot <3

Warnings: fluffy, mentions alcohol, mentions light teasings, suggestive if you squint and lean forward a bit, basically just a fluffy one shot/drabble

Words: 350 words.

If you want a song just listen to this album tbh bc both Wonwoo x Reader are down bad for each other. (I was listening to End Game, So It Goes, and Dress while writing tho xo)

You were not one who drank often. Anyone who knew you knew this. Alcohol and you were not best friends. You were a textbook lightweight and tonight you proved it. You tried to hang and drink with Mingyu and Seokmin's significant others but after about two Somaek's (Soju + Beer) you were feeling it.

Tonight, Seventeen, their management, their friends, and their significant others were celebrating the new album release and had just finished listening to the album and now you were all celebrating.

You took another sip of your Somaek and made eye contact with your equally lightweight boyfriend who was sitting at the bar next to Chan who was teasing him for already feeling whatever he had been drinking. Your tipsy brain had just thought that maybe he needed some saving so you attempted to make your way over to him only to falling in the process.

"Aigoo" Seokmin's partner coo'd before laughing along with you and Mingyu's partner. Wonwoo quickly got up concerned at you being a mess and attempted to wobble over to you to make sure you were okay. This caused the rest of Seventeen to have divided reactions.

Seungkwan, Mingyu, and Minghao were concerned for their hyung while Seokmin, Chan, Seungcheol, and Jisoo all laughed at his antics.

You looked up at Wonwoo who was just staring at you with a soft smile while asking if you were okay. For a moment it was just you and him, him and you. Your best friend and his best friend. It made your heart swell and get a bit teary eyed which to anyone else would be confusing especially because you were just laughing, but Wonwoo understood what was going on.

He helped you up from the floor and gave you a quick peck before leading you back to where he was sitting next to Chan. He loved you so much and you loved him. The rest of the night, both of you just snuggled at the table while watching everyone laugh and continue to drink. You both felt so much peace and it was wonderful.

~~~~~~~~

I struggled having inspiration to write this. Might make a part 2 when I get more inspo xo

[partycatty]

Hi so this is gonna be LOONGG, but I’ve been cooking this up in my head and the scenarios before bed so be ready for the plot I’ve created over a few weeks. You can use as much or as little of this as you want, but I really love your writing style and can’t wait to see what you do with this:3

Alright, so Bi-Han is married and his partner (who I always envisioned as chubby personally) have been married for a short time now, and Bi-Han is still somewhat distant. Your sex lives aren’t being neglected at all, but your emotional and non-sexual physical needs are!! Bi-Han shows his wife little to no affection in public, it’s better in private but barely so. He won’t even hold hands in public!! Like he is so unimaginably stiff and cold that his wife starts to think that maybe he think that they’re disgusting or doesn’t actually love them!!

This makes his wife fall into a Depressed state bc she loves him wholeheartedly and all he’s done so far is talk about getting them pregnant and brush off affections. Was she now stuck in a loveless marriage forever? Out of Anxiety and Depression she loses her appetite and loses some weight, to the point of concern from Bi-Han AND his brothers. But they can’t get an answer her them bc all she seem to do these days is sleep and eat. They don’t train, meditate, smile, laugh, walk in the gardens, nothing!! And Bi-Han only sees his wife when she’s asleep or falling asleep and muttering about how it’s nothing.

Kuai Liang eventually grows worried for her health and with the help of Tomas corners them. She breaks instantly, collapsing into heart wrenching sobs against Tomas. For her sake they take her back to your room, and she spills her guts. Both are horrified by this news, they can read their brother exceptionally well and are well aware that all he wants to do is be near her (and inside her) all the fucking time. He’s just apparently ass at expressing this.

While Tomas comforts her, Kuai Liang runs straight to Bi-Han. His eldest brother was pouring over maps a long since cold breakfast beside him. Kuai Liang does not knock and nearly jumps over his brothers desk to pull him along. Bi-Han was going to be mad, but then he says like “I’ve figured out what’s going on with your wife” so he can’t really be mad now can he? She was losing weight rapidly and had become a shell of herself, it kept him up most nights. Kuai Laing spills everything and Bi-Han can feel his heart break into a million peices. It was him causing you this anguish?

Bi-Han was raised to only think of his clan and their betterment, and the only reason he thought he’d ever marry was for heirs. Affection was not common in his family, not until Tomas came along and he was a teen then, and thought that affection was stupid and for babies. But clearly his wife needed it, so perhaps it wasn’t as dumb as he thought it was.

He demands Kuai Liang take him to her, and when he sees you just wailing into his youngest brothers shoulder? Sure a part of him was jealous but he couldn’t really think about that right now. He takes you from Tomas and into his arms, and promptly sends his brothers away. Once they were gone, he lays down on the bed and held her against his chest.

He doesn’t know what to say, other than constant blubbering apologies about neglecting you. He says I love you more than he’s ever said them before in his life, and kisses her face about a billion times. His hands keep her in place, but her arms are around his neck and he can feel her breathing slowly even out on his collarbones. This is so intimate, so precious that he feels lightheaded. For so long he had pushed her and the thought of affection aside it had warped his view of both. He knew his wife was strong, but she also needed the comfort of a hug more often than thought.

Eventually you calm down enough to talk so he shifts his position into a sitting one, keeping her caged in his arms all the while. Now his hands are rubbing along her curves and he’s apologizing again, and he’s explaining himself (probably over explaining really) because he was so scared that he would lose her to his own actions. And she’s just so understanding, probably too understanding, and hugging him telling him it’s okay, and that she knows that this is how she is. But her brain just spiraled into a state by itself.

Bi-Han doesn’t forgive himself, and he doubts he ever will. But for now, he smiles and nods (a bit stiffly), then he leans down and kisses her sweet lips. And it’s so tender and loving and gentle it catches her off guard. Bi-Han was a very rough lover and sure he’d kissed her before but he hadn’t kissed her like *that* before. When they pull away, he asks her if she’s hungry, (he will send for food no matter what she says) and what she’d like to eat.

Lunch arrives quickly, and he watches her eat the entire meal (plus a bit of his own he put on her plate) smiling gently. Once she was fed he opened his arms again to her, and just holds her. Did he have duties? Oh yeah, he had a lot he was supposed to do today. But now, his wife was much more important than anything else in the world. Eventually she asks him to join her in the gardens, and he agrees.

There in the flower garden he had planted for her as a wedding gift, they spent the rest of the day. And that night, Bi-Han sends for a filling dinner that he shares with his beloved in their shared room. And his beautiful wife sleeps soundly, head on his shoulder with her breath brushing over his chest. (And maybe things get a little spicy too at some point, but I don’t think he’d be all that rough after the day they had;} )