#i call it...semi chibi. or whateve

[thedolsideblog]

time for school! who are you gonna spend your time with? 📝

[suntoru]

𝚑𝚎𝚊𝚛𝚝𝚜𝚝𝚛𝚒𝚗𝚐𝚜 𝚊𝚝𝚝𝚊𝚌𝚑𝚎𝚍 𝚙𝚝. 𝟸

synopsis: you find a gigantic stuffed bear at your desk for valentine’s day! how does your bnha best friend react when it’s not from them?

a/n: bnha version <3 hope you’re all doing good

warnings: a bit of swearing, fluff, crack, semi-angst

genshin version

izuku really tries for you :((((( he tears up, inside his heart breaks a lil bit seeing you so happy with the stuffie, but he doesn’t want you to see him being upset. he pretends to be excited for you, but the smile doesn’t really reach his eyes. he knows it’s unreasonable to be mad at a pile of fluff and fabric… but… he js wants to be your favourite again 🥺

“y/n! …oh, you’re busy cuddling with the bear? …i guess i’ll just go over there then…”

bakugo absolutely loses it. you have no idea why he’s so pissy today, did you do something wrong? when class ends, he doesn’t wait for you to get your stuff like usual, and he doesn’t sit with you at lunch… it stings a lot bit more than you think, you feel so alone. ending up in tears, you call him sobbing, telling him you’re sorry for what you did wrong :( he comes barging into your room five seconds later and crouches over you, wiping a stray tear dripping down your face.

“listen dumbass, i’m… sorry. no, you didn’t do anything wrong. here, i got you your favourite chocolate so you’d stop your whining.”

todoroki’s confused. who gave you this giant bear? why didn’t they give it to you themselves? and most importantly, why does he feel his heart twist? he decides he doesn’t like this feeling. he tells himself it’s illogical to be jealous of an inanimate object, but after class, he takes you to the nearest plushie store and tells you to pick out whatever you want. or better yet, why not just buy the entire store? 

“hmm? what do you mean i’m insane? of course i can afford it, would i offer it if i couldn’t?” yes

kirishima is genuinely happy for you. of course you’d get a stuffie, he thinks you’re amazing and that you totally deserve it! he even hypes you up, telling you that you’re super manly n his favourite person. when you open up your locker after lunch, you’ll find a chibi crimson riot plushie and a polaroid camera photo of you and him during the sports festival 💗

“that bear is super cute! just like you <3”

kaminari hates it. he hates your attention not being on him, he hates that you hug the bear but not him. so what does he do? he tries to gaslight you into throwing it out 💀💀 throwing shade at the bear, getting offended when you defend it, and being all pouty when you huff at him. he squats in a corner, pursing his lips together, mumbling under his breath about how he’ll zap the bear in the balls later 🤩.

“stupid bear… who do you think you are, taking all of y/n’s attention?”

shinsou looks like he couldn’t care less, and for a while, he doesn’t. but when you start to no longer take naps with him because now you have a cuddle buddy, that’s when he has a problem. he physically snatches the bear off his delicately placed spot and tosses it carelessly on the ground. he wiggles onto your bed next to you, taking the place of the bear who was there seconds ago. he swipes the drool off the corner of your mouth before joining you in slumber.

“why the bear is on the ground? it must have fell off.”

tamaki is insecure of it. do you like it better than him? why do you call it your new best friend? have you replaced him? you clearly notice when he starts to get distant, but you can’t figure out why. is it because you’ve been spending more time with nejire? that must be it! when you apologize to him for accidentally ignoring him for your friend, he sighs in relief. at least you still want to be his friend and maybe more

“i-it’s really no big deal. i get it if you like nejire better than me. wait… nejire?” 

dabi doesn’t give a shit. i mean, he’s confident that you won’t leave him because you both have unresolved feelings for each other, but that doesn’t stop him from burning poor teddy into a crisp :( don’t worry though, he’ll just ‘buy’ you another one! he doesn’t mind another late night run with you, especially if it makes you happy. 

“hah? those ashes are from… my cigarettes. maybe shiggy or toga has your plushie.”

hawks juts his lips into a pretty pout. he’d make a really good stuffie too, y’know… if only you’d notice his feelings for you. but on another note, he leaves hints that he just released a new line of hawks chibi plushie, and he just happens to have a couple extra… pouts further when you suggest that he should hand them out to fans next time he’s at an event.

“what? that’s- not what i meant…”

[teecupangel]

On a matter of better parents - and the quote from one of fics I've read that basically implied William (possibly even yours?) should better be prepared to answer to Altair Ibn La-Ahad about his treatment if Desmond in afterlife... Imagine William passing on and really having to face all the past assassin's who may or may not have been semi aware of Desmond coasting along, and certainly were returning favor by watching his life now

We going to assume everyone who has died is in the same afterlife and not in, you know, whatever Isu bs Alexios/Kassandra went through in Elysium/Underworld/etc

By the time Bill died, Desmond would technically be dead long enough to be buddy-buddy with the rest of the dead populace of the AC franchise so... it's not just gonna be the Assassins who want to 'talk' to Bill.

My idea is that you will see Bill sitting on his heels/legs which is commonly called seiza like this:

But without the mat. The thing about this type of sitting is that it takes lots of practice to keep sitting like this for hours without feeling any pain or discomfort so it's a kind of torture for those unfamiliar with it.

So he's sitting like that and someone has placed a sign on his chest that says "Fucked up my son really badly, come yell at me" like one of those bad pet photos.

Then you'll see two long lines of people just waiting to have a go at him. The lines are so long that people are holding up signs that say "line ends here" and "priority line for ASSASSINS ONLY" then a smaller sign that is duct taped to it that says "except if you have a valid id that confirms your blood relation with William or Desmond Miles"

The lines are so long and the afterlife is... well, time is meaningless in the afterlife anyway, so everyone is just lining up and some are still walking towards the end of the line (and maybe some have already had a go but are lining up again). The loudest voice that could be heard is Claudia Auditore shouting on a megaphone

AN HOUR PER PERSON ONLY UNLESS YOU HAVE COUPONS! ALL COUPON HOLDERS MUST BE CHECKED HERE FIRST! MAXIMUM OF 3 COUPONS PER SESSION ONLY! IF YOU HAVE MORE THAN 3 COUPONS-

Claudia takes the time to glare at Altaïr, Ezio, and Connor who are actually in the normal line. Altaïr is glaring back at her, Ezio is looking at his sister with puppy dog eyes that don't work on Claudia at all and Connor looks so embarrassed being part of the shenanigans that Altaïr and Ezio had done earlier in Desmond's 'honor'. She aims the megaphone directly at them.

YOU CAN ONLY USE 3 COUPONS AT A TIME AND MUST REJOIN THE LINE! YOU CANNOT JOIN THE PRIORITY LINE AFTER USING 20 COUPONS AND MUST JOIN THE NORMAL LINE! WE DO NOT ACCEPT 100 COUPONS FOR A SINGLE SESSION! I REPEAT. WE DO NOT ACCEPT 100 COUPONS FOR A SINGLE SESSION! A BADGE SAYING 'DESMOND'S FAVORITE' DOES NOT GRANT ANY SPECIAL TREATMENT!

"But it is official!" Ezio shouts proudly as he showed the badge pinned to his robes (the badge has a chibi drawing of Desmond doing two thumbs up and a dorky smile and, if you squint really hard, you might see a familiar signature just at the edge of the drawing) while Connor tries to hide behind the two badge-wearing dumbasses even though his height and build makes that impossible. His own badge shines even as he hides behind the two.

And then Layla takes the megaphone from Claudia and aims it at the lines themselves

DUE TO DESMOND MILES' GENETIC MAKEUP, THE RATIO OF PRIORITY LINE TO NORMAL LINE WILL BE 3 TO 1! THANK YOU!

Just as Layla returns the megaphone to Claudia, someone from the very end of the line that sounds a hella lot like Rodrigo Borgia shouts "What does that even mean?!"

Claudia just places the megaphone by Layla's face as Layla shouts

IT MEANS 3 PEOPLE FROM THE PRIORITY LINE CAN HAVE A GO AT HIM THEN 1 PERSON FROM THE NORMAL LINE CAN GO NEXT THEN WE GO BACK TO THE PRIORITY LINE!

There's a bit of noise going everywhere and Layla groans as she shouts

JUST, EVERYONE LISTEN TO MALIK AND BAYEK'S INSTRUCTIONS WHEN YOU GET TO THE FRONT!

"Bayek's in the priority line!" Somebody that sounds like Taharqa shouts in the middle of the normal line.

Layla turns to look at the priority line and, yeah, Bayek is there, waving three coupons at her with a smile on his face so she grabs the megaphone from Claudia and shouts in his direction.

YOU ALREADY HAD YOUR SESSION, BAYEK! IF YOU HAVE MORE COUPONS-

Layla turns to Claudia and whispers, "How many coupons has he already used?"

Claudia shows her thirty-three coupons that say "This is a Desmond Miles approved coupon to shout at my father for an hour. signed, Desmond Miles" with a chibi drawing of desmond doing the "(ﾉ≧ڡ≦) Teehee~!" expression (and a small signature of Leonardo da Vinci by the picture) and had been hastily (and angrily) written over with BAYEK at each one in Claudia's handwriting. All thirty-three of those coupons have already been noted with the word 'DONE' on them as well. Layla rolls her eyes and turns back to Bayek

JOIN THE NORMAL LINE, BAYEK! PRIORITY LINE IS ONLY FOR ASSASSINS WHO HASN'T HAD A SESSION YET AND HAVEN'T USED UP 20 COUPONS YET!

There's a clearing of throat and Claudia elbows Layla hard. Seeing Maria Auditore raise an eyebrow at her as she stood at the priority line. Layla sheepishly used the megaphone to add

AND ANYONE WHO CAN SUBMIT A VALID ID THAT CAN CONFIRM THEY HAVE BLOOD RELATIONS WITH WILLIAM OR DESMOND MILES. THANK YOU.

Layla runs back to where Bill is and hopes Malik is holding down the fort now that Bayek has rejoined the line.

So Claudia is repeating the same instructions, sometimes adding in the following:

ANYONE NOT FOLLOWING THESE INSTRUCTIONS AND GIVING US AN EXCUSE OF 'EVERYTHING IS PERMITTED' WILL BE BANNED FROM JOINING THE LINE FOR THE NEXT 24 HOURS.

CLAY KACZMAREK IS BANNED FOR THE NEXT 45 HOURS FOR NOT FOLLOWING THE 1 HOUR PER SESSION RULE AND MAKING HIS OWN CLAY COUPONS. WE DO NOT ACCEPT CLAY COUPONS! I REPEAT WE DO NOT ACCEPT CLAY COUPONS.

WE ARE CURRENTLY IN THE PROCESS OF ADDING MORE EVENTS WITH WILLIAM MILES. AT THE MOMENT, THIS EVENT IS SPECIFICALLY FOR HIS TREATMENT OF HIS OWN SON, DESMOND MILES. EVENTS FOR OTHER PEOPLE OR OTHER GRIEVANCES ARE CURRENTLY BEING PLANNED AND WE WILL ANNOUNCE OTHER EVENTS WHEN IT'S READY. IF YOU BELIEVE YOU HAVE THE RIGHT TO YOUR OWN EVENT, PLEASE TALK TO RANDVI AT THE INFORMATION DESK. THANK YOU!

ANYONE CAUGHT SMUGGLING ANY OF THESE BANNED PEOPLE INTO THE LINE WILL BE BANNED FOR THE NEXT 24 HOURS AS WELL.

99 HOURS REMAINING: EDWARD JAMES KENWAY, ALEXIOS AND KASSANDRA OF SPARTA, AND EIVOR VARINSDOTTIR FOR ATTEMPTED ASSAULT WHILE DRUNK.

70 HOURS REMAINING: MARIA THORPE IBN-LA'AHAD FOR POSSESSION OF FIREARMS AND INTENT TO USE FIREARMS.

67 HOURS REMAINING: CHARLES LEE AND OTHER COLONIAL RITES TEMPLARS, INCLUDING SHAY CORMAC, FOR INSTIGATING THE 'HAYTHAM KENWAY IS BEST DAD' MOVEMENT.

52 HOURS REMAINING: JACOB FRYE FOR SMUGGLING DESMOND THE DOG INTO THE LINE AND ORDERING SAID DOG TO BITE WILLIAM MILES' PENI-

"Excuse me."

Claudia looks down from the box podium that she had been given to stand on.

"I was kicked out of the priority line-"

Claudia aims the megaphone directly at him

PRIORITY LINE IS FOR ASSASSINS AND ANYONE WHO CAN SUBMIT A VALID ID THAT CAN CONFIRM THEY HAVE BLOOD RELATIONS WITH WILLIAM OR DESMOND MILES ONLY. PLEASE GO TO THE NORMAL LINE.

"But I'm an Assassin."

Claudia stares at him for a moment before grumbling under her breath "the nerves of some people..."

She aims the megaphone where Malik is stationed as he's keeping a timer to make sure no one goes over the one-hour limit (unless with coupons) and says

MALIK, ARE WE COUNTING AL MUALIM AS AN ASSASSIN OR A TEMPLAR?

A loud chorus of angry and irritated shouts rang all over the two lines and you can barely hear someone that sounds oddly like Robert de Sablé shout "Put him next to William Miles!"

"He betrayed the Brotherhood! Normal line for him!" Malik shouts and it's almost hard to hear him because of how long the distance between them is and the other angry shouts.

Claudia turns her megaphone back to the old man and says.

YOUR BETRAYAL HAS INVALIDATED YOUR ASSASSIN STATUS. NORMAL LINE!

==== Meanwhile ====

Desmond is just signing more and more coupons while Leonardo and Sofia are printing more and more coupons using the fastest printer that Leonardo himself made together with Alexander Graham Bell. All coupons are being delivered by Darim and Sef Ibn-La'Ahad, Flavia and Marcello Auditore, and Io:nhiòte and her two other siblings. Coupons are free to order but priorities are given to anyone with Ibn-La'Ahad, Auditore, and Kenway bloodlines.

Shouts of "NEPOTISM!" are ignored.

Shouts of "FAVORITISM!" are answered with "Hell yeah, we are!" without any shame.

[talzana]

hii!! this is like my first time ever requesting and you can always ignore this or whatever if you don't want to do it but can i request a headcanon for shiratorizawa (if that's okay) where they have a manager (the reader) and during their 1st to 2nd year they were like soooo short but during the break before their 3rd year, they grew so tall and the team's just like 😀❓

i can kind of (?) relate to this?? except i haven’t grown at all. anyways, i hope you like it 😭💕

WOW, YOU GREW

Warning(s): Spoilers (If you watched all of the four seasons, then it should be fine)

Description: During your first and second year at Shiratorizawa High School, you were short. What happens if after the break before your third year, you grow way taller?

Reposts are appreciated!

• When people looked at you, the first thing they noticed was your height.

• You were considered short for a second-year, and if you had to guess, you were probably one of the shortest people in your school.

• It frustrated you to no ends, like, why did you have to be so short? Even so, why was that a bad thing?

• You became a manager of the team when Ushiwaka and Tendou had joined it, of course, they both had mixed reactions to seeing you there.

• Ushijima just looked you up and down and said, “your short.”

• You were just like, um, I know? What do you want me to do about it?

• He literally had to look down on you whenever he spoke to you, something you absolutely hated.

• As for Tendou, the first time he saw you, he couldn’t help but tease you for your height.

• “What’s a middle-schooler doing here?”

• If you looked close enough, he looked genuinely confused.

• You just stared blankly at him, then moving on to the coach of the volleyball team to ask if you could become a manager.

• Normally, the team didn’t have managers, but coach Washijo could see the determination in your eyes, he couldn’t help but say yes.

• As a manager, you did have some trouble doing stuff because of your height, like reaching up for something that the coach asked you to get.

• Though you never asked for help, you just found other ways to do stuff, like standing on boxes or chairs for stuff you couldn’t reach.

• Tendou would call you ‘chibi-chan’, and every time he did, you glared at him.

• Over time, the nickname did grow on you, though.

• For Ushijima, he was indifferent towards you, a reason why you respected him.

• You and Semi got into arguments a lot, which usually started when he mentioned something about you being short.

• When you got back from summer after your first year, you only grew a few centimetres, something you were definitely upset about.

• Yunohama thought you were a first year, and when he learned otherwise, he couldn’t help but be embarrassed.

• You just laughed it off, not wanting to further embarrass him.

• Shirabu was respectful towards you, though you knew that along with Yunohama, he also thought you were a first-year, he just didn’t say anything.

• Your second-year was pretty normal considering your team went to nationals during your first-year, so you were pretty used to that.

• Now, during the summer break, you grew a lot.

• You were much taller than before, although still not as tall as the boys on the volleyball team; but that was usually the case.

• So, when you entered the gym during your first year, everyone was a little confused, by a little, I mean a lot.

• They seriously thought you had a twin sister, like how could you grow that much during such a short period of time?

• Tendou couldn’t use your head as an arm-rest anymore, something that he used to do a lot.

• Believe me, you were extremely happy about that.

• The new first years, Goshiki, Akakura and Shibata recognized you as a third-year, not making the same mistake the second-years did.

• You could reach things without trouble, and overall your height made things so much easier for you to do as a manager.

• Tendou still called you Chibi-chan, because you were still shorter than all of the third years, but not by much.

• You were no longer the short manager, and you and Semi found yourself in less arguments because of it.

• No one could use your height against you anymore, and for that, you were glad.

[selinakidreams]

Ship your moots!!!

👁y’all done it now, I was WAITING for this one OO I’m gonna spoil my moots SO bad ! I love you guys 👁

this is gonna be long I’m so sorry

@keishinslove - carter,,,, I love you and I love you w me mister keishin ukai- NOT just because that’s your ✨mans✨ but because I fuckin see it with my eyes. mister man is out here smoking a cig while he waits for you to get off of work. everyone is out here looking at him like “who dat b he’s sexy” and then you walk out and he drops the smoke on the floor, steps on it, and smiles as you make eye contact. You smile too, finally allowing exhaustion take over as you slump in the welcoming hug he pulls you into. He’s like, “I know baby, let’s go home and I can make us some ramen and tea.” The rest of the night is full of terribly sung songs, heavy MAKEOUT sessions (maybe more) and feathered touches along your skin. He’ll take good care of you (in every means) and that’s all I want for you <3

@alto-march-of-death al I ship you with tsukki- now let me tell you why. I see you with someone who’s very reserved with who they show their emotions to,, now because you deal with youngsters,,,,,,,,, that’s a lot of energy put towards you all at once. Tall blond dino dude will be there for you but in ways that make you feel special and the lack of energy he shows is almost calming to you. like like I just see on a day where zoom has been a bit too much and parents were DUMb- you slink over to your couch- after class is over- to find tsukki there, watching animal planet, and bam you plop down and curl up in his side- no words needed. His eyes don’t leave the screen but a long fingered hand lands on your thigh, his thumb doing that thing that makes butterflies flutter in your rib cage. It’s peaceful. Nice.

@kmorgzz ENERGY. POSITIVITY. COMPASSION. All things you and hinata share <3 OOOOOO KAR YOURE ALWAYS THE SWEETEST AND LET ME TELL YOU !!!! YOU DESERVE THAT SAME SWEETNESS. sorry I’m yelling but hear me out !!! You guys are always doing SOMETHING. he’s restless and you take on the energy he gives off. You guys tend to do stuff that you wanna do because whatever you want, he wants !! Normally, it’s outside (cause he’s the sun and he makes you feel like you’re on cloud nine !!) ; could be walks that lead into picnics or something super sweet!! Always wants to make sure you’re smiling !!!!!! ALWAYS. oh also he’s such a big himbo that he just—— yk what I’m gonna shut my trap just,, oh MAN he just loves you SO much and will never run out of ways to show you

@introloves Jax... FR fr I ship you and bokuto SO hard. like this man is and deserves sunshine— that is exactly what you are. TWO SUNSHINE BEINGS. I just SEE it. wholly. he’s just so open to everything and anything !!! Sometimes a bit.. daft... but you definitely talk him through things and he heavily appreciates that & everything you do for him. you know what,, y’all would soak in lavender baths together. Your back against his front, your eyes closed and body relaxed in the warm water; the sent of lavender following the steam that rises from the bath. He likes to play with your soft hair and whisper about how much he loves you and how you are one of the best people in his life. How did he ever get so lucky?

@novvabeam jackieeee,,, miss ma’am.. I ship you with daichi. lemme explain. This man is like a horse- not many can ride him but for those who do, it’s a lifelong partnership. Dude is so !! Into you it’s CRAZY. He is obsessed with how soft and kind you are one minute, and the next his head is spinning by how powerful and strong you can be. Mad respect™️. First date (idea suggested by you) was at this really cute local ice cream shop where you two bonded over how absolutely different your flavors were. I see it.

@pinkoushi ellen + Suga; clear as day. soft cuddles and every day fikas. very chaotic neutral energy but constant attention and praise is given. (Me trying not to make something based off my memories in Sweden but is gonna do it anyways) like I could see him being so excited to move to Sweden for the education system lowkey- but before he started the school year, you just wanted to take him around the country and visit all the “popular places” before settling down. Lots and lots of train rides. you would be sitting across from each other- you’re semi asleep, head pressed against the window and he’s just watching as the fleeting golden light hits you, making you all glowy. he feels so warm, so content.

@chaotickatts katts ;) I hear sakusa is calling your name. loud and clear. man puts up with NO bullshit and neither do you. Your communication skills are off the charts; calm cool, collected- that’s you two. But I also think that you add a lot more fun in his life- like he loves every second with you- he shows that he appreciates it in your guys’ shared love language, more often than not. And he adds this grounding element to your relationship that makes you feel capable of anything- and you make sure to tell him every day. I hc that people call you the parents of the group. Your guys’ bathroom is very clean, well organized, and used quite often. he loves seeing you in his jersey when you’re brushing your teeth, on your way to heading to bed, makes him feel all fuzzy,, a feeling that was quite foreign to him until you came along.

@spikesbimbo valentine... is that even a question- Aran. duh. Pretty lady, both of you are CRAZY for each other except he shows you in little ways (in public) that make your heart spin. You know those pictures of Vanessa hudgens and Austin butler?? the one where she’s twirling around and he’s just smiling? that’s the vibe I get in the relationship; you’re fun, loud, and outwardly fun while he’s just happy to be in your presence!! you make him laugh... a lot. It’s really refreshing to most of his friends. You and you’re cute goofy ass are just so important to him. I see it now- you guys are shopping at an outdoor mall, drinks in your hand and he’s carrying most of your guys’ purchases in one hand while the other is being swung by you. You’ve got big doe eyes as you look at every store, until you turn around, and flash him the biggest smile. “Want some? I’m almost out!” You’d say as you thrust him the drink. He’ll smile, a flash of pearly whites greeted you as he nodded and said a small “yeah,” before wrapping his lips around the straw.

@hajimeshon-ee menace, baby. it’s obviously gonna be iwa for you. big beefy to help you fight people who are being assholes. those same beefy arms that pull you in from behind- your back against his front. LOTS OF FUCKING FOREHEAD KISSES. ESPECIALLY WHEN YOURE POUTING TO HIM. sorry I don’t make the rules. He honestly thinks you’re the cutest thing, your fire matches his and sometimes actually stumps him to where he has no retorts. He likes to help you with your work sometimes, like when he sees it’s a bit too overwhelming for you, he’ll wordlessly sit down and take some of the papers that have been scattered across the table. Later you take the time to show him how grateful you are, wether it’s through a night where he gets to choose what both of you will watch or.. other things... he’ll appreciate every single second.

@kuroosusagichan meeeellll <3 business man kuroo is summoning you on his lap, he can’t focus unless you’re with him!! Oh GOD the dynamic Between you two makes me lightheaded!! Okay so idk is this is obvious but like dude has a size kink- not just sexually though. It’s like a cute AND sexy thing for him. Dude just loves how tiny and soft you are. But don’t get it twisted, he’s not completely fooled by your innocent act- you’re a clever little minx sometimes, but most of the time youre just the sweetest person. You’re like the angel that holds him back from being an asshole. He likes himself better when you’re around. Oh but he’ll also call you chibi-chan. Period. OH YEA! loves it when you show up to his place of work- no matter how swamped he is, he’ll always make time for his little sweetheart. You like to visit when you saw he was visibly stressed in the mornings, you bring him little things taht make him smile like his favorite iced tea or your a sweet lil cookie. He’ll make you stay with him for the rest of the day, doing your own separate things but also being in each other’s company relaxes the both of you.

@scorpiomoonslutt hey bitch, you needy lil whore <3 it’s gotta be Ushijima for me. Your size kink is just.................... thrown in his face and my god he’s living. You make him realize things he didn’t even think were possible- but anything is possible with you, apparently. The way his eyes go WIDE when he hears you SNAP at people. He had no idea that someone so small.. could shut someone up that fast... especially when it’s someone almost twice her size. He actually doesn’t even know how to react when the other person leaves, there’s wayyyy too many things going on in his head. He’s proud, impressed, turned on, curious, but most of all- speechless. He kinda... wants to see you do that again.

@dymphnasprose dymphna !! kyoutani!!! It just makes sense!! big angri boy needs parts on the head from a saint, such as yourself. He knows you’re not looking to fix him- which is why he allowed himself to open up to you. You love him just the way he is and it almost drove him a lil nuts. I could see the breaking point now- just before you two would get together. He would be yelling at you, screaming things like “how could you possibly like me ?” At first he wouldn’t let you get close to him but after several steps that never budged when he neared you, he gradually let you touch his heated skin. He was breathing heavy, trying to put together how someone so wonderful could be interested in someone who was so angry. I just feel that you would cup his face and whisper, “I like you because you’re you- it doesn’t matter who I am in comparison to you. I like you, taro.” There would be no need for gushy details, that alone opened a small part of his heart to love- throughout the years, the opening continued to grow and grow. He would be someone who just!! Loves you!!! And hates the rest of the world <3 idk I just love it jdbsjnd

[angrymongol01-archived]

A/N: Am reposting two of my shelved discontinued fem!Hinata fics from my old blog here (for exposure ig? Also I didn't delete them completely there, they're just posted privately lol); for those who've read the original post before and wondering why this blog repost another blog's work, supplies~!! OP here, filling this blog with some Haikyuu content from last October. Enjoy ^^;; ALSO DO NOT SEND HATE ORZ smh

My Masterlist

Prologue | 01 | Omake 01

tho it doesn't looked like an extra chapter at all smh ahaha

Omake 01

wc: 1.9k words

warning: mentions of thigh touching (and probs kidnapping but not implied), a bit of OOC-ness, a few ‘damn’ mentions.

note: indented paragraphs -> flashbacks

*NOTE: since purple/violet is unavailable via PC (using desktop beta lol), I'll use yellow for Ushijima instead.

“…ta…nata…Hinata!”

A female’s voice continued calling her from her deep slumber.

The faint smell of ammonia wafted in the air.

Eyelids slowly opened as she regained consciousness.

“Ah, thank goodness you’re awake now, Hina-chan!”

“Yachi-san?” She groggily glanced at her friend.

“I’ll tell the others she’s awake!” Suddenly, the owner of that voice earlier, Date Tech’s manager, Nametsu Mai, stood up and headed outside the door. Yachi nodded her thanks.

“W-what happened… Where am I? Is this not our—the managers’—room?” she asked.

Hinata started to sit up from where she was laying but wobbled.

Luckily, Yachi and their second-year senpai Kinoshita Hisashi helped her out and gently positioned their fellow member on one corner of the classroom-slash-makeshift sleeping area.

Her senpai sheepishly replied to Hinata, “This is Date Tech’s sleeping quarters. We were having our first practice match of the day, against them, when Sugawara-san called to inform that they’ve found you together with Shiratorizawa, and their captain carried you on—“

The decoy shivered, thinking about the restroom incident hours ago.

“—and fainted on Ushijima’s shoulder. Ma~n, Suga-san’s so furious back then Kageyama had to stop him from killing them.” Kinoshita chuckled.

“Your room’s kinda far away from where they found you, so the managers decided to drop you off here since it’s the nearest one.”

Hinata sweatdropped, a bit embarrassed.

“Ah… thank you, and sorry for whatever inconvenience I have caused earlier…”

Yachi shook her head. “No, no, it’s fine! You’ve done nothing wrong, Hina-chan~,” she grinned at the orange-haired girl.

Smiled back also.

Then she suddenly facepalmed. “I forgot about the practice match! Is it still going yet?”

“It finished an hour ago, we lost—2-1,” a scowling Kageyama answered, trudging towards the three.

“K-k-kageyama…!!!” the female middle blocker blanched with fear, hands gripping the blanket draped on her lap, while the raven-haired setter shot a menacing glare at her, which she averted. “I’m… I’m sorry for—“

“Are you alright?” he quietly asked Hinata, his hand perched on her head.

His deep blue eyes swimming with concern and worry.

She felt a slight flush on her cheeks while meeting his gaze.

“H-hai, I’m fine!” the chibi assured Kageyama. “Nothing to worry about, Bakayama-kun~!”

And she smiled at him.

The boy suddenly became hot and turned to look away from her, hiding his flustered face with the back of his hand.

“H-hinata boke… idiot,” Kageyama stuttered, his heart thumping louder than normal.

Ahh… he sure is whipped for Hinata, that Kageyama boy, Kinoshita thought, shaking his head.

While their blonde manager only giggled.

Recovering from his blushing mess a while ago, the raven-haired setter took a deep breath, narrowed his eyes at Hinata and quipped.

“But I guess you do know that we lost in the match earlier because of your carelessness around your surroundings, right, dumbass?”

He smirked.

This pissed the female decoy and threw in some punches at Kageyama, which he constantly dodged. “Shut up, you!! I said I’m sorry, alright?!”

“No, you did not!”

“Yes, I did, Bakayama!”

There goes their ‘lovers’ quarrel’ again… hahaha…

“Hinata!” Sugawara’s sweet voice boomed inside the room as he entered together with their team’s captain Sawamura Daichi. Beside them tagged along Hinata’s friend from Date Tech, fellow middle blocker Aone Takanobu.

“Ah, Sugawara-san!” The first-year idiot duo stopped their bickering when the gray-haired setter all of a sudden hugged her.

Hc’d Suga and Hinata are chummy-chummy but in a mother/daughter sort of way.

He is, after all, Karasuno’s Sugamama.

“Honey, are you alright now? Did those Shiratorizawa bastards hurt you? Don’t lie to me!” She blinked in reply, baffled.

He might cry in an instant now—

“Oi, Suga, calm down,” Daichi said, drawing circles at the fellow third-year’s back to calm him down.

Aone then stepped closer besides Hinata and sat with his legs crossed, his eyes gazing at hers like Kageyama’s.

“Are you okay?” he asked her, his deep voice nearly startled both Hinata, Yachi and Kinoshita.

Date Tech’s one-third of the famous Iron Wall is a man of few words, and his replies were mostly grunts, hand gestures, and nods.

So it’s rare for him to speak, or ask a question, especially to a member of the opposite sex—or, in this case, at Karasuno’s Number 10. At Hinata Shouyou.

She held both hands at Aone’s now flustered cheeks, and grinned.

“I’m okay now, Aone-san! Don’t worry too much~ nn?” She tilted her head while looking at him.

C-cute… she’s cute, No-Eyebrows thought to himself. Even the other boys thought so, too.

Then he nodded.

Hinata patted his shoulders. “Good!”

Ahhh the power of friendship, feat. AoHina—

“Say, Hina-chan,” Yachi looked at the orange-haired girl. “Care to say to us why you fainted on Ushijima-san’s shoulder?”

The chibi stilled herself, cheeks starting to get a bit red. Kageyama noticed it.

“A-a-ano!! H-hinata-chan, it’s o-okay if you d-don’t have to tell us! S-sorry for asking such a foolish q-question—“

“Yachi-san, calm yourself down, too—,” the captain sweatdropped.

Looking at the people around her, Hinata slowly opened her mouth to speak.

“My thighs are kind of ticklish when being touched,” she muttered, face in an embarrassed state.

“Ha?” “Ticklish?”

“He—Ushijima-san touched the back of my thighs, but just to keep myself from falling down his shoulder!” the female middle blocker said aloud, pouting. “That’s why I… f-fainted earlier.”

Her partner remembered the face she made while being carried on Ushijima Wakatoshi’s shoulder.

“USHIJIMA-SA—hyaah! …P-please… stop—“

A vein pop ticked on the raven-haired setter’s face, his jawline twitching slightly.

Kageyama’s fists gripped hard, his face a big scowling mess.

Damn that Ushiwaka guy—

Another dark aura emitted on another corner as vein pops ticked on both Dadchi and Sugamama.

Wearing their scary faces.

Both Hinata, Yachi and Kinoshita panicked, while Aone furrowed his brows.

“Did you bring some shovels, Daichi?”

“They’re inside the bus compartment, Suga.”

“Good. We’re digging some graves for some perverted volleyball dorks to bury down later—wanna help us, Kageyama?”

———

Meanwhile, at Shiratorizawa’s side of the training camp, the members were at the sidelines, taking a break from practice when—

“ACHOO!!!” Tendou sniffled for the nth time already ever since coming back to the gym with Ushijima after the incident with Karasuno’s Number 10. “Uh, yizz…”

“Tendou-san, are you really alright?” their team’s first-year ace-in-the-making Goshiki Tsutomu asked, his face scrunched with worry. “You’re sneezing constantly.”

The redhead shook it off with a wave of his hand in reply, and smiled grimly.

“Yeah, I’m a-OK, thanks for your concern, Tsutomu-kun!”

“Oi, are you sick?” Shiratorizawa’s team mom third-year setter Semi Eita stared at his fellow third-year teammate with disgust. “If you are, please stay away from us! We don’t wanna get infected by your cold… Goshiki, don’t go near him!” “Eh? But, senpai—“

Tendou narrowed his eyes on him. “Semi-Semi, if I do have a cold, I will first go straight at ya and share my germs, duh!”

“DON’T CALL ME BY THAT STUPID NICKNAME, YOU IDIOT!” the team mom seethed, throwing a pack of tissues at the middle blocker in reply, hitting his arm.

A quarrel ensued at Shiratorizawa—

“Okay, guys, that’s enough! Save your bickering later at lunch period,” another third-year, Oohira Reon, chided and managed to stop both Tendou and Semi from tearing off their heads.

While the rest of the team just sighed and/or watched at a distance.

“Ano sa…”

Some of them turned their heads at the semi-deep voice of second-year starting setter Shirabu Kenjiro.

Idk how to describe voice ranges ‘cept high-pitch, deep blah blah sorry—

“Tendou-san, you mentioned earlier that you and Ushijima-san met Karasuno’s Number 10, right?”

“Aye~ we have!” the redhead then nudged Ushijima, who was sitting near him, on the side. “Right, Wakatoshi-kun?”

He nodded. “Un. We met Hinata Shouyou early this morning, outside the gym.”

“EHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!! You two met that cute sunshine already upon arrival!?!!” Both their libero, Yamagata Hayato, and middle blocker, Kawanishi Taichi, squawked at their captain.

Their faces looked like (‘◉⌓◉’), with Kawanishi gripping the collar of Shirabu’s shirt, shaking wildly.

“T-taichi, stop shaking me, goddammit—!” Whack!

Said second-year middle blocker started to wail in a dramatic way.

“WHYYYYYYYYYYY—!!”

Dunno how to grasp Kawanishi’s personality here tbh so stfu dejk—

“We were about to bring her here back though…” Then Ushijima’s usual stoic face darkened a bit.

“…if only those Karasuno setters didn’t show up.”

“Ah, that Kageyama guy and their vice-captain, isn’t it? Number 2?” Shirabu pointed out. “That guy’s really scary even though he has the face of an angel; their captain also.”

Oohira asked, “Wait… so you two attempted to kidnap the girl?”

“No, no, ‘kidnapping’ will only cause us trouble,” Tendou said, waving his hand in a disapproving way.

“Let’s call it ‘luring her with some sweets then put her inside a potato sack’—“

“ARE YOU A DOWNRIGHT LOLICON!?!!” Semi screamed straight at the Guess Monster’s face, pissed at his earlier statement.

Tendou vs Semi, Round 2–

“I-I heard from Date Tech’s Koganegawa-san that Hinata-chan fainted on you, Ushijima-san,” Goshiki stammered, red tinge on both his cheeks due to embarrassment, maybe? “Is that true?”

Ushiwaka nodded curtly. “Ye—“

“EHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!! SHE DID WHAAAAAAAAAAT!?!!” Both Yamagata and Kawanishi squawked again, interrupting his response.

Their faces now looked like (● ˃̶͈̀ロ˂̶͈́)੭ꠥ⁾⁾, with Kawanishi again gripping the collar of Shirabu’s shirt, shaking wildly.

“KAWANISHIIIIII!” An uppercut.

Chaos ensued inside the Shiratorizawa Academy (High School Division) Men’s Volleyball Club.

Their captain declared to himself, his olive-colored eyes shone with determination:

We will take Hinata Shouyou here, in Shiratorizawa. She should have (come here). Whatever the consequences be.

“WHAT IN THE WORLD ARE YOU SLACKING OFF, YOU NIMRODS!!! GET YOUR ASSES BACK TO PRACTICE!!!!”

“HAI!!!!”

———

How did the supposed-to-be ‘rumor’ begin? It all started when…

“Aaaarrrggghhh!! This is not right, Ryuu!”

“Huh? What d’you mean ‘not right’, Noya?”

“I want to sit next to our cute kouhai Shouyou on the bus earlier, but it’s always that bastard Kageyama who gets to sit beside her!! Hnnnnnngh—!!! He gets to touch Shouyou’s hair whenever she dozes off, or place her head on his shoulder to sleep on! Or-or maybe even take a candid shot of her sleeping cutely—dammit!!! This is frustrating!!!!!”

“Ahhh~ I know how you feel, bro! I, too, want to sit next to our precious Hinata-chan on the bus! B-but… Noya, what about Kiyoko-san?”

“Ryuu bro, our loyalty is always on our beautiful goddess Kiyoko-san—BUT SHE’S DIFFERENT FROM SHOUYOU! Our kouhai is literally the epitome of a living sunshine~! She cures our blues away! Remember that time during our match with Wakunan, when you were kind of down about Daichi-san’s injury then Shouyou suddenly hugged and peppered you with words of encouragement?”

“Oh, yeah! It calmed my senses down… and also! Remember when you came back from your suspension, and me and Hinata noticed bruises—“

idk I really need to refresh my HQ knowledge by rereading the whole manga orz—

“—on your arms? Ma~n, she freaked out and began applying those with some ointment she had in her bag. And you told me later that time Hinata’s hands were very soft even though she spiked and blocked so many balls in her lifetime? Also that expression on your face! So priceless!”

“Ahhhh~ I wanna touch Shouyou’s soft hands again longer! Not just a high five—but holding hands!”

“Me too~ Damn, I wish there’d be some kind of (rotational?) seating arrangement whenever we’re on the bus, traveling to matches and stuff…”

“Ryuu! Noya! Heya!”

“Tora! Our shitty (city) boy from Tokyo—wassup!”

“We can’t wait to play another game against you guys later! ww”

“Same here!”

“Ah, what are you guys talking about?”

“OUR PRECIOUS KOUHAI HINATA/SHOUYOU!!!”

“Eh? Shrimpy-chan? What about her?”

“It’s like this….—“

The two crows and mohawked cat walked their way inside the camp premises, talking.

Unbeknownst to them, two eagles accidentally eavesdropped on the earlier conversation.

DO NOT REPOST/EDIT WITHOUT PERMISSION. PLAGIARISM IS A CRIME, KIDS. LIKES ESPECIALLY REBLOGS ARE HIGHLY APPRECIATED. ALL WORKS © angrymongol01 - 2021.

[zee-writes-and-draws]

Could I request a Raian Kure with an fem s/o who he sees again after disappearing not by choice, but they do keep in contact. Maybe she returns with baby girl. Bonus if Erioh is completely taken with her like Karla. (og sent from sol-chibi-writer)

A/n: @sol-chibi-writer no prob! (Sorry this is so late, my laptop deleted my go draft and i got caught up in appointments and essays, so i only had time to re-write this a few hours ago.)

——

Whatever Raian was expecting, it wasn’t her running into the Kure home. Her irregular footsteps, her voice, her cheesy slacky grin, he hadn’t seen those in almost a year. It can’t be her, she left, but it is.

Normally Rain wouldn’t let anyone this close, but here he was, being hugged to death by her. It had to be her. The grip on his upper back instead of lower, the slight smell of dying but not yet dead flowers, the scars on her forehead all confirm it. Only she knew where that one ticklish spot on his back was, and she was pressing it now the way she always did.

“I’m back, I’m back, it’s me Raian, it’s me”

“(Name), where the hell did you go? Why did you go! WHY!” Maybe Raian should be relieved she’s back, but he’s mostly pissed. (Name) left almost a year ago and, sure, she called, but she promised to be back in April! It’s fucking October now! “WHERE THE FUCK DID YOU GO YOU ROTTEN-” Thank god she kisses him then because he had no actual insult planned there.

“Look, Raian, I didn’t want to leave, I got kidnapped. They took all of my stuff, and their home base was in fucking Hicksville, Michigan. I got out after about two months, but with the injuries and the, other thing, I couldn’t come back until about now.” Okay, that might be a semi-valid excuse to not have answered the phone and calling him from a payphone instead, but what injury could hold (name) back for that long? Raiain had seen this woman catch bullets and run on broken bones. She didn’t get that injured.

“Why did they kidnap you? And what “other” fucking thing?”

“Well, a) because I was, err am, was, your girlfriend, and b) I, ummm, kinda,” she’s stalling. The last time she stalled was never.

Bad sign.

“I, uhhhh, waskindasortapregnantandgavebirthandwehaveadaughternow.”

Pause.

What.

“We,” he motions to both of them, “we have-have kid? You-Y-You were pregnant?” Smooth, he knows, but the fuck? When?

“Yes. You needed a kid to help with the whole ‘Kure clan strength’ thing. Erioh said I was a good candidate because I was strong enough. We both agreed to not use protection once we both found out we were clean. You came in me. That’s how children are made.” (Name)’s slow semi-patronizing explanation, combined with her how unhooking what he thought was a backpack to reveal it as a backwards baby carrier, makes the situation fully sink in.

“How old’s she?”

“Four months. She has your eyes, and your annoying tendency to bitch whenever I leave the room for longer than an hour.” There’s no venom in either of their voices.

“She got a name yet?”

“I was thinking we could decide together, but-” Whatever (Name) was about to say is drowned out by the people running in.

“See, I told you, Reichi! (Name)’s back!”

“She is, Henzo, so you were right. Gramps, she’s holding a baby. (Name), is the baby-”

“Yep. All black eyes, just like her daddy over here.”

“Let me see her! Quickly! Hello, my great-great-little granddaughter, hello!”

“Give me my fuckin kid back!”

“Watch the language, (Name)!”

“Shut it Henzo! That’s our kid gramps just stole, she’s allowed to swear if he doesn’t GIVE US THE FUCKIN KID BACK!”

“My beautiful great-great-granddaughter.”

“Let me go, Reichii!”

“Fuck you!”

“Watch the fucking language!”

Whoever this child ends up taking after, she’ll certainly have a delightful family to deal with.

——

END

[luminisvii]

Am I losing my shit about fanfiction again? You BET! It’s time for Tell to lose her goddamn mind about some truly awful fanfic! It’s my blog, I get to do what I want! And that’s to talk about how people are more blessed than they believe since they didn’t read this!

Today I’m going to talk about Super Smash Sisters: Damsel to Hero. Given the title uses a word like Damsel in it and it’s rated M, this is going to be GREAT

content warning for well what do you think a horny man on the internet would write ie: cheating, incest, terrible depictions of women being horny, violence (I don’t explain any of this in detail so you’re welcome. but it is mentioned) I’m not linking this thing because you guys don’t deserve this.

It took me forever to finish the entire fic, and I actually wrote most of this before finishing. You may say “Wait a second Tell, you need to fully read the work in order to discuss it!” No I do NOT. Trust me, this doesn’t need to be finished to understand. I needed moral support for this, I couldn’t have possibly read this by myself. I feel really sorry for my poor friends that have to deal with this horse shit with me because it’s kind of got a bit of je ne sai completely godawful. I’m semi tough and can stomach some senseless nonsense pretty nicely, but the real heroes here are my friends for toughing out the rampant sex and terrible female character writing all mixed with Call of Duty plot and characters. You thought this was about Smash Bros? WRONG! 

I know exactly jack about the author, Yamagata, other than they are probably some poor horny straight guy in high school or maybe a genius troll. We just don’t know. Either way they were pretty dedicated. The fic itself is 91,621 words and 45 chapters, and apparently on hiatus but we all know hiatus is just another word for dead. It’s better off that way. All good awful fics end on a cliffhanger.

The premise, as the title implies, is that all the men of Smash are kidnapped by nazis or some shit after a failed drug raid and it’s up to all the women to save them of which there are Zelda, Peach, and Samus because this was written in the Brawl era. You might think “Wait, isn’t that not a lot of female characters?” right you are! The author decides to bring in tons of female characters from all sorts of video games and anime. A personal favorite is a major character in this fic is Bright Noah from Gundam, notably not a woman. I love him! I’m disappointed he hasn’t slapped anyone yet! What’s the point of importing Bright Noah into a fanfic if he isn’t going to deliver a Bright Slap? Sorry folks, there’s gonna be me getting distracted about Gundam once in a while.

I can’t remember exactly what happens because the chapters really blur together quickly. They’re almost always first half violence in COD land and second half really bad lesbian sex scenes. See, the title is a misnomer. The women don’t actually do a lot of hero work. It’s still handled by men. Ones who aren’t even from Smash Bros. Bright Noah and another guy called Hargrove who I’m not familiar with are constantly telling the women what to do and while the women sometimes go on missions to fight Nazis or whatever, half the time we’re following some random male characters. A good friend had no idea one of them was Tuxedo Mask because they used his dub name and we spent like ten chapters with this idiot before realizing it was him. They just spend their time fighting different various enemies from real life as opposed to smash. So the guys fight and then the women all fuck because when your boyfriend is missing you have to immediately bang the nearest female out of grief. It’s not cheating if it’s gay! Even worse is there’s a lot of incest because apparently that’s how women act, too. Also for some reason when the women DO fight it plays exactly like the men’s side but with Bright Noah just telling them what to do. Also for some reason Peach just fucking kills people and I’m not really sure how to deal with that. Like, yeah, I guess.

Let’s try to do a plot recap but that’s going to be difficult because I’m not sure what the plot is. Okay, in theory, I do. But we’re just circling around and doing the same thing so many times that I’m plain lost. 

In theory, the plot is as mentioned before. The men of Smash get kidnapped and turned to trophies by Nazis. I’m noting that besides Nazis the men are all brutally murdered in order to turn them into trophies. Then it turns out that Samus, Peach, and Zelda are safe because they were at the Smash Mansion cleaning and having sex as princesses and bounty hunters are known to do. Then they find out from Bright that the men have been kidnapped so they have to form a task force against them. So there’s a long ass paragraph of characters, many of which do not have speaking lines until much later anyway, but they’re all female characters from other games or anime. I’m really into Fire Emblem and there’s a bunch of those so time to cry. Bright has to tell these women to stop being so damn emotional and be ready to start murdering. 

Also in the first chapter, we have the reveal of the villain, some Tabuu knock-off named Emerald. She too recruits a ton of villainous characters who all introduce themselves AFTER THEY’VE BEEN RATTLED OFF IN PARAGRAPH FORM. You didn’t get it the first time? They’re all going to painstakingly state their name and identity. Admittedly it’s kind of funny to have Cell in a room with Liquid Snake and Ashnard. Also who invited Valtome? They didn’t even invite Zelgius. Maybe our favorite Begnion General figured out that a certain thirsty ass senator was gonna be there and stayed in bed today. Okay, fewer tangents, I promise. 

With the establishing of all the villains and heroes, everything instantly turns to shit. Half the time we’re not even following a group who’s connected to the main characters and when we are with the main characters they are either having terrible sex or shooting nazis. This sounds like it’d be funnier than it is but it’s really Grade A Depressing. I can’t tell what’s going on or why and since I have exactly no knowledge of Call of Duty I’m afraid I don’t know anything about our actual protagonists either. Every chapter starts with some pretentious usually WWII related quote and involves some guys dying and then some ladies bonking. It’s the same format every time and after a while I feel like this is some advanced torture method. 

Among the bad sex is for some reason moms are banging their elementary school age daughters because their husbands are out. Women are so horny they’d rather fuck their children than wait long enough for their husbands. It’s so messed up. My eyes naturally glaze over on the sex scenes because they’re kind of clinically written and something about cute pussies or whatever. I feel bad for Bright Noah, he has to break up these badly written orgies to talk more about the nonexistent plot. Bright Noah needs a raise. All in all the sex is something that maybe a 13 year old boy might find hot if he hasn’t managed to read all the other way better smut fics out there. If 13 year old boys even do things like that. 

Since there’s no way for me to coherently walk through the plot since each scene hardly seems to amount to anything besides either violence or a roll in the hay, I’ll just have to start briefly talking about the few notable things that happen, probably out of order. Who the fuck even knows what chapters these happened in? I sure don’t! 

First off, a lot of the women conscripted into the task force have supernatural powers but they’re just given guns. I also think the author has something for Krystal or whatever since we focus on her a lot for no good reason. The women are also often infiltrating secret bases to nazis or other bad guys that I’m not as well versed in because admittedly I’m not that interested in the history of warfare, modern or old. I just assume this is a COD thing. But in order to infiltrate the bases, they just wave papers at literally every guy they come across and that does it somehow. I started going ballistic and every time they mentioned papers I would start screeching again. They get stopped by some dude and he’s always like “Where are your papers?” and they ALWAYS have the papers and then they go past but the author FEELS THE NEED TO KEEP BRINGING IT UP. It’s like The Black Fucking Mountains again. Something I’ve learned about myself is that I do poorly with overly repetitive writing, so I wonder why I’m reading world’s most repetitive piece ever penned for fun. I can’t recall anything that happens in any chapters.

Somewhere in the mix they actually save Ike, Marth, and Roy. Somehow the most in character thing in the entire fic happens with them when it’s offhandedly mentioned that they sometimes dogpile into the same bed as a joke. What was more shocking to me is that suddenly Ike is a total nuclear bomb genius out of nowhere. Sure, he’s from a medieval fantasy setting, he knows what nukes are. We finally get some more plot. Apparently Emerald is trying to develop some insanely powerful nuke in order to destroy the trophies of the remaining captured heroes. See, she’s holding them ransom so she can get… money? Power? Fame?

Trying to do this from memory is so hard. I did My Inner Life practically all from memory, only going in there for the copy and pasted quotes! What the heck? This fic just slides off my brain. I don’t know if finishing it is even worth it since it’s not like I’m reading any of the sex scenes in detail (I mean why would I, a woman with decent taste, want to read about usagi feeling up chibi usa) and I sure as hell can’t understand the Call of Duty parts so in conclusion this fic really wasn’t targeted at me. 

But whatever. So now the main crew has to slaughter their way to bomb storage or development or something. Some of the COD guys died and I didn’t notice, some of the villains died (tragically Valtome was K.I.A.) and all in all too much sex was happening. Seriously, Mist has sex on her brother’s bed, that’s kind of nasty. I don’t know why I’m so hung up on all of that. It’s like the piss drinking thing, it’s a minor offense in a long line of “HOLY FUCKING SHIT” but here’s where I get derailed. 

How many times can I say that this fic is terrible? Because it is. I don’t understand who a lot of these characters are and why they’re here or what they’re doing. I managed to read to the end and all that I learned was Shadow the Hedgehog apparently cheated on Rouge with some guy called Makarov who is another major villain. What, so when Rouge cheats on him with another woman it’s fine, but when he cheats on her with a man he gets killed for it? I smell double standard! Don’t worry, I’m a feminist, I support equal rights of everyone getting punished for their perpetual horniness. Still, there’s this shocking turn of events where the men are somehow the ones who aren’t constantly obsessed with sex and the women are going around topless and banging each other constantly while homosexuality in men is seen as evil and wrong. For some reason I think the person who wrote this might be a man. He feels the need to remind us, 40 chapters in, that there will be No Yaoi scenes but plenty of Yuri. No shit dude, like, fuck! I didn’t know! 

Towards the end, Washington DC gets overrun by Colombians and the team has to kill them. There’s some drawn out attack sequence where everything is described in monotonous detail with military terms I don’t understand. I have a general revulsion to military weeaboos as they are sometimes called, so this stuff turns my stomach. It also features Kenichi, the main character of the animated Metropolis adaptation, which I DID see a long time ago! This little boy is killing people! It’s fine! Also it mentions Frau Bow from Gundam and discusses that she’s training to fight in a mobile suit to help support, but Peach and Samus are the ones who actually use the mobile suits. Peach kills people in the RX-78-2. I’m not sure how to feel about that. Another aside is King Boo is in the mix and he dies. How do ghosts die? Asking for a friend. 

There’s also some weird aside of the COD guys doing an arrest in Disneyland. Gaz, Soap, and Price all go there guns akimbo and chase down some dudes and some people die. I don’t think Disney would like that. This also comes out of nowhere, Gaz was playing fucking Go with this dude called Katsuie and it was practically a smash cut transition of “well I arrested a guy in Disneyland once wanna HEAR about it?” and it was. Something. I don’t understand why we did this.

We end with Krystal and Fox discussing that she’s breaking up with him because while he was held hostage, she got engaged to a woman and is unceremoniously dumping him. The scene was honestly kind of funny for the fact that she was having a lesbian three way in his fucking bathroom and then was like “Yeah we’re not dating anymore. I’m engaged. Later idiot!” while naked. Shortly after it’s decided that they need to bomb some German base, I think. So Bright Noah tells the crew to suit up and get ready, and so Krystal and her Lesbians fly off to go fight. Krystal ends up in a one on one with a dude called Scales who I’m unfamiliar with since I don’t know Star Fox lore but I’m sure it’s super important to Krystal. The duel ends so badly that Fox needs to jump in and he and Scales end up plummeting to their death out a window and also getting blown up by grenades. Fox just fucking died for the girlfriend that cheated on him the second he wasn’t home. Honey, you deserve more than this, and Krystal deserves to be treated better by the narrative as well. He gives his blessing as he’s dying, though, so it’s fine. 

The whole thing ends shortly after that. It was never completed, not that I think it could be, since I read all 91k words and I still don’t understand who is who, what’s going on, or why things are happening. Even if I did know all the characters featured I don’t think it’d help. I know about 50% of them and it’s not helpful at all. I completely forgot that Emerald is a thing. She’s the main villain! She’s hardly in it! The guy should have cut the shit and just written 

Tell’s recommendation? Don’t read this unless you’re really, truly a masochist. It’s not funny enough most of the time to justify the insanity. It’s sexist and racist. Chapters monotonously drone on with the same things happening almost every time. The bad sex isn’t even funny. Save yourself the trouble and if you really must know, check out the first few chapters only and then call it. The author has other works that I haven’t read but I’m not sure that I will based on the quality of this work, and they also published something as recently as 2017 meaning they could probably rise from the hiatus grave and kick my ass for trash talking them. 

One Sentence Review: Bright Noah doesn’t slap anyone. 

[fathercharlesoffdensen]

LA LA Land

(I want to pretend this isn't Important Enough to me to spend actual time parsing out and posting on Tumblr, but, well, there you go.)

I used to think the 'Loki's Army' moniker was a mostly harmless, if somewhat overzealous, appreciation for a Loki whose presence in the MCU was pretty much exactly what one would expect from Joss Whedon, aka a glossy, smirky, smarmy baddie with hot one-liners and a great costume. The Loki in Avengers (2012) is precisely what MCU execs likely had in mind when they called on the character to be a semi-sympathetic Magneto-Joker hybrid, and it worked well enough. In the early days of the MCU, no one cared too much about casual sexism or on-screen representation of minorities or even the Chitauri being a sloppy metaphor for an America still reeling from 9/11, and so it was even kind of cute to gigglingly don chibi Loki baby tees at cons and movie premieres ordering people to kneel and "keep calm, you mewling quims :3." Mind, I still had a knee-jerk reaction to said moniker from the get-go because, like most fandom terminology, it was fucking embarrassing (miss me with all the 'kerfuffle,' et al bullshit, thanks), and I was born with the soul of a 900-year-old woman apparently, but no one would have taken you seriously for positing a legitimate complaint about it at the time.

I think things have evolved a bit since then, though. Even beyond fandom's collective consciousness over various social issues and what have you, it's come to pass that Loki's character arc has been fleshed out. Far from being a winking, "you kill because it's fun," Draco Malfoy-esque, cookie cutter bad guy, we now know that Loki's actions during Avengers (2012) were at least 3/4s because he was literally being mind-controlled and monitored by Thanos, and maybe 1/4 him keying into his surface-level reputation as said winking, posturing baddie so he could make a good show of attempting to pull off the whole Tesseract heist. Are there aspects of his overall performance where he seemed to legitimately be enjoying himself? Sure. Dude is one culture's embodiment of the very essence of chaos, after all. Even when his actions in Thor (2011) seem to hinge on his troubled family life, there's still an aspect of it all where Loki's sense of "just a bit of fun" pushes the boundaries of what's appropriate, and it probably always will. Still, there now seems to be a sharp divide in post-Ragnarok, pre-Endgame fandom between Loki fen:

1. People (often queer, kink-friendly, fandom veterans) who appreciate that Loki is a complicated little fucker, without denying that this includes his considerable flaws - namely, a penchant for Making Things Worse for himself and others in his immediate vicinity due to his sensitivity and pride. Loki is absolutely sympathetic, and the rough patches in his upbringing and subsequent fucking up by Thanos are upsetting, but showing him on-screen gradually putting his relationship with his family members into perspective, including going a ways towards mending his relationship with Thor specifically, is championed as understandable and positive character growth. Naturally, a lot of these types of Loki fans ship Thorki, or at least strongly appreciate that the strengthening of their brotherly bond is a sign of maturity for them both. Likewise, the things Loki must do out of sheer survival when the chips are down (e.g.: Whatever might have happened between him and the Grandmaster) are a sign of his inner strength, not a blemish on his morality. Even so, not all of Loki's coping mechanisms are healthy, and no one around him is perfect either (where's the fun in that?), so ish gets messy still; you know, like life.

2. The second type of Loki fan still clings to the Loki's Army alignment, seemingly unaware that it only ever championed a pale facsimile of everyone's favorite trickster in the first place. In other fandoms, these fans generally dislike the w00bified character's canon relationships with anyone (consider Anakin fans who despise Obi-Wan), and LA types seem to be no exception. Loki's small ambition to be a king from way back when seems to be their endgame for him, and a pox on anyone who, Odin forbid, thinks it's okay for him to move beyond that over the course of like six movies. LA fen generally err on the conservative side of things; like their Tumblr blogs filled with lengthy screeds of meta that always seems just slightly off in its conclusions (e.g.: That Taika Waititi and Chris Hemsworth formed an I Hate Tom Hiddleston clique on the set of Ragnarok, my personal favorite crackpot theory), they seem annoyed by attempts to paint their hero in a humorous light, taking it for disrespect, and/or the implication that Loki is anything but a pious, delicate waif who has been ruthlessly manhandled by everyone from his (to be fair, legitimately emotionally abusive) father to (apparently) Captain America, for making fun of him for being scared of thunder and lightning that one time.

I guess what irks me the most past being embarrassed that I care about other people being Wrong on the Internet is the implication from the latter type of Loki fans that the former type is 'moronic' for, I guess, not placing Loki's tumultuous family background at the forefront of their pity party for him and legitimately pretending all of his other misdeeds and what have you do not exist. Even taking into account like, women who become pen pals with serial killers in prison and the whole 'everyone's a hero in their own mind' adage and whatnot, it still baffles me a bit. In the grand scheme of things, I guess the hardest part is having to warily spot-check Loki-centric blogs before following them, so like, I'll live, but still, ugh.

(Topaz, no.)

[sootaitil]

Glasses in art

This is entirely for me, so feel free to completely bypass this post from such a nothing account.

As a self-proclaimed artist, and as someone who wears glasses, it gets on my nerves after a while of looking at characters who wears glasses, but it's obvious the artist didn't realize even glasses with small prescriptions warp the face under them when looking through the lens at the wearer. Now, this mostly comes from the place of my glasses warp my image to a pretty extreme margin, I have extremely heavy prescriptions (yes, more than one, I have an astigmatism). This means that even if you aren't close to me, you can tell just how blind I am.

'But what does this have to do with art, ya stupid cat?'

I'm getting to that. My favorite thing to draw is characters, mostly one-off designs that never go anywhere. When I draw these characters, I almost never add glasses.

'Why?' you may ask. Well here's the answer.

It's freaking HARD!

What a lot of people don't realize when drawing characters with glasses, is that there's a lot more to it than just slappin' on a couple of squares and calling it a day. Depending on the frame and shape of the character's face, a lot can affect the overall design. And the great thing about that is that a lot of artists realize all but one thing about glasses, and unfortunately that one thing is the whole point of glasses.

THE PRESCRIPTION

If there is no warp at all, that means no prescription, meaning the glasses are costume. Not real. And I see this issue with semi-realistic art the most. It doesn't bother me that much if the style of the art is mostly cartoonish, but when people with more realistic styles forget that one detail, it can totally break the illusion, and my suspension of disbelief.

For me, because I'm extremely near-sighted, my glasses make my eyes look a little smaller, and the sides of my face are a good half-inch farther in than the rest of my face. To compensate for this odd affect, I have giant frames (they're about half the height of my face if you exclude my forehead). And I know people who do the opposite to minimize the affect, getting the smallest frames they can get away with.

If your character wears glasses, remember this, it adds to the realism more than it subtracts from the character's attractiveness. And if you don't feel like it, make there a reason why they wear fake lenses, or glasses at all.

Or do as I do and avoid it like the coward I am!

But don't really quit, even I am working on how to fit glasses in my more realistic style.

But all this is void if you draw in a cartoon style like I mostly do. Of which case, glasses pretty much are just a couple of (whatever shape) slapped on a face.

Even that can have a bit more effort. For my cartoon-y style I make the eyes noticably smaller than characters that don't wear them. But that's pretty all there is to drawing cartoon glasses.

And yes all that still applies to anime and chibi.

You're welcome from some random, dumbass cat who can magically type.

[shimmersing]

Okay it was more like 4 people. ;_; OMG guys. I feel so loved.

Questions from @aearyn:

1: Corn or Flour tortillas? Street tacos: corn. The bullshit I make? Flour.

2. Last book you read? Uhm. Huh. The last one I finished would have been the Lost Plot, third from the Invisible Library series. But you guys are keeping me so busy with fanfic I literally haven’t read a book in months. NOT SORRY AT ALL.

3. Top 3 fave actors? Clark Gregg (dude is SO nice), Oscar Issac (delicious), & Marina Squerciati (adorable).

4. Sun or Rain? I’m gonna say rain because I don’t get to enjoy it often in Colorado.

5. Beer or wine? Neither, really, though I’ll enjoy a lambic or sour if they’re not too hoppy. I love cider (REAL cider, fuck that Angry Orchard bullshit, blegh, that’s not cider it’s fucking nasty apple juice), or something mixed (I like Dr. Pepper & whipped cream vodka at the moment!).

6. Do you prefer calling someone or emailing/texting? God please email or text, I hate talking on the phone.

7. Where would you go on vacation if money was no object? Japan, Morocco, or NYC for like a looooong stay where I can pretend I’m a local.

8. Do you have any tattoos? Two: the Jedi Order symbol on my right shoulder; a semi-colon on my left wrist.

9. What did you major in/are you majoring in at university? I have a masters in curriculum & instruction, as well as minors in visual art & music, because I couldn’t decide what I wanted to be when I grew up.

10. Fave author? YOU GUYS! Followed by Catherynne M. Valente & Sarah J. Maas.

11. Romance or action? BOTH GIMMIE GIMMIE.

From @the-empires-weapon: (I’m gonna put this under a cut because it’s long af and content warning for kind of intense gender & sexuality discussion.)

(Also not gotta tag anyone else because brain is empty and I think we’ve all done it like three times already. XD)

Favorite band? Sooooo, most of my favorite artists happen to have a band also? Sara Bareilles, for example. Who also has the Waitress Band with the Broadway show. Just go with me.

Would you rather live by the beach, or by the mountains? If I don’t live by the mountains I don’t know which direction I’m facing. Honestly tho, I love both.

Have you attended university, and if so, what did you study? If you didn’t, what’s your area of expertise, or what would you have studied if you went to a school of higher learning? I have a masters in curriculum & instruction (elementary teaching), as well as minors in visual arts & music. Uhhhh, it took me a long time to figure out what I wanted to be when I grow up. Still not actually sure most of the time.

What character has influenced you the most in life? I’m gonna say Sailormoon, and here’s why: I got online and into cosplay because of Sailormoon, and met my best friends through those fandoms. We’ve been in each others’ weddings and they’re my kiddo’s surrogate aunts & uncles.

What kind of art do you like seeing from others? What’s your favorite style, of sorts? I... like... art? Like most of it? I like everything! Chibi style, uh, cartoony or comic stuff, realistic stuff... alas, I have no idea the appropriate terms for any of that stuff. BUT I LOVE IT.

What do you prefer: Youtube, Netflix, or cable? Youtube is a trashfire, and we don’t have cable anymore. So Netflix it is!

What kind of sensations belong with sex? (I’m curious because I’ve *always* had the idea that pain is just a part of sex, regardless of virginity, and apparently that is not the case??) FYI: answering as a straight, married cis-female. Sometimes comfort and closeness that doesn’t necessarily come with a lot of that physical lust or climax, but very emotionally fulfilling. Sometimes the exact opposite like “I have been thinking about banging you all day and we have a half hour before we have to pick up the kid so get in here.” Hahaha, sometimes, it’s even a little obligatory, like “yeah, we’re both tired and not really feeling it but this is an important part of our relationship to maintain, so we’re gonna work up to it.” I guess that’s sort of more emotional sensations? Physical pleasure is probably a primary motivator, but I think my husband and my relationship is also strongly influenced by the emotional connection, too. Neither of us are into pain (lube is your friend no matter what your method), tickles are fun (humor is also important - if it’s funny, you’re doin’ it right), whatever physical actions that drive anticipation. TOUCH, pure and simple. I have no idea if I’ve even answered the question at this stage. XD It’s my hope everyone can have a partner(s) (who wants) who can communicate and learn with feels good and what doesn’t. (PS: my first time wasn’t painful - awkward af, but not painful. All that virginity bullshit is myth and social construct designed to disenfranchise women.)

To my trans* friends: how and when did you learn that you were trans*? To my cis friends: have you ever thought about gender and how it might’ve applied to you? For genderqueer folk (or anybody who’s just feeling awkward about the gender question), what’s your favorite fruit? Gender is a social construct; you are who you are; you are valid, you are real. I am constantly in awe of the strength and courage of folks who are forced to struggle over who they ARE. You are the bravest people in the world. I think fitting into the cis-female pattern gives me a lot of privilege, and I want to use that privilege to make sure others feel safe and happy.

What is the earliest meme you can remember from your first days on the internet? God. I don’t know if it counts as a meme, but we used to have webrings that you’d join and then it’d literally be a ‘ring’ of websites linked to each other. And they all had themes and shit. God, the 00s.

What’s one weird thing that fascinates you? Durians.

Do you believe in the supernatural. If you do, what kind of things do you believe in? If not, what’s the reason? I’m not sure, actually. I’m a very Scully-style skeptic: I want an experiment to be repeatable. I want solid scientific method. 

[italicwatches]

Comic Girls - Episode 02

Why do I let myself stare into the abyss. …Anyways, anime. Anime is a good distraction. It’s Comic Girls, episode 02! Here we GO!

-It’s a new day at the dorm. The landlady is handling a chat with Kaos’s editor, who seems to be getting pegged into the motherly role for our little pink moeblob. And she can confirm that everything’s going great between all the girls, they’re getting along wonderfully…

-As Koyume puts Kaos’s long hair up into some twin buns. So what’s the over-under on the whole damn dorm turning Kaos into their doll slash mascot? But, they’re going out on a trip today! And not alone either, they’ll have Ruki and Tsuba—

-TSUBASA HAS ARRIVED! FULL SERIOUS MODE ACHIEVED! FEEL HER MANLY CHUUNI CHARM, YE LESBIANS, AND TREMBLE!

-Ruki quietly pulls her idiot roommate back to make her put on normal clothes. But even normal clothes still have Koyume swept up in her manly chuuni charm.

-Opening! Yep there are those lilies. If anyone turns out to really be a bear, I called it now.

-So where’s the gang going? Into Shinjuku, into the city proper! Into the kind of place where the trains are packed and the crowds are thick! So thick that Kaos finds herself being swept up in the sea of people, unable to escape…! At least until Ruki starts hauling people together. Ruki and Tsubasa, and Kaos quickly realizes all that damn manly charm Tsubasa has.

-Sidenote, just so we’re clear, I’m not the only one who’s just calling her Kaos all the time. Everyone is. We have heard her real name all of once, and I’m not sure what it is without looking it up. She’s just Kaos, through and through.

-Anyways, where do they end up first? Well, Kaos wants to go to a big proper book store…And woooowwww, this is a big place. Also I’m about 80% sure the fictional books the girls call out, like Super Exciting Paradise and Pretty Highness, are shoujo-ai books at the least. But that’s not all they find…Tsubasa’s latest work, the very same series they were just assisting on a few days ago, is on the shelf! And with a popup ad and the cover displayed! Holy shit they’re in the presence of not just an impossible amount of manly charm, but a GOD.

-So Koyume has to buy, like, five copies. As does Kaos. Even though Tsubasa has multiple copies of every volume to be given away as gifts. But you’re not going full otaku, or full hard crush, unless you’re spending money you don’t have to feed the machine. But eventually, they have their things…

-So what’s the next step? To a super trendy cafe! Where Kaos freaks out because only super cool high school girls can go in there. One, none of them are cool. Two, you’re a high school girl. Three, chill. Also Ruki insisted on lunch because if she doesn’t, Tsubasa will burn through all of her blood sugar at the art supply store and get dizzy. Again. So shut up and eat your damn crepe.

-And when the crepes arrive, Kaos doesn’t know how to handle something so cute, in a place full of nothing but trendy cute sexy young women in tiny miniskirts…Until finally Koyume feeds her the dang crepe.

-Finally to the art supply store and the meat we came here for. Kaos is freaking out at the density of the place. But, first step for her is she wants a full set of things she’d need as an assistant to be able to help everyone else out on the fly. Necessities it is! Forward MARCH! And then Tsubasa sees something she wants and she’s just gone, lost in her own fan behavior. Enthusiastic Tsubasa is kind of adorable, by the way.

-Then she picks up a feathered quill pen and sure, it looks cool, but it just seems impractical…

-And then Koyume says she looks cool with it and Tsubasa immediately goes FULL SERIOUS. Four-Quill Dip Style! And now she’s going to buy them all! Plus a ton of ink and new dip pens, as Koyume keeps trying to imitate her…And Tsubasa tries to encourage her to find her own path, but Koyume is most firmly motivated by, well, being like her Tsubasa-sama. It’s all that manly charm.

-So, quick sidenote, let’s explain fancy pens! While the analog comic artist has a lot of different options, there are essentially three major camps worth discussing for doing ink lines. These can be summed up in tech pens, brush and fountain pens, and dip pens. Some of this might get covered in the episode itself, but I love talking about stupid shit, so.

-Tech pens, or technical pens, started life as engineer’s tools before artists found them; you might be familiar with the Sakura Micron line if you’re a fucking weeb like myself. These are noted for a small, semi-flexible tip that gives a very consistent line width, and of course have an internal ink reservoir. Their greatest asset, this consistency, is also their chief weakness: A 0.5 millimeter tech pen is basically always going to put out a 0.5 millimeter line no matter which way you turn it or press it. This is fine, even preferable for more basic linework, but if you want to do more complex stuff…

-Then you need to consider brush and fountain pens. These are very different tools, but I’ve bundled them together to talk about them since they carry some similar advantages and disadvantages. Both still use an internal ink reservoir, though whether it’s pre-installed in a disposable or can be refilled varies. A brush pen uses an actual, quite flexible brush tip of I waaaaannna say a firm foam material, but don’t quite me on that, while a fountain pen uses a metal nib against a ribbed feed. The chief advantage here is flexibility; because firmness and angle matter, you can vary line width from stroke to stroke, or even within the stroke, by controlling your pen. The downside, naturally, is that you have to provide that control. Getting a line to stay at that 0.5 millimeter width the tech pen offers so easily, can be real hard with a brush pen, and not that much easier with a fountain pen. You don’t have as much flex with the fountain pen, but the size and shape of the nib give you a lot of control over like shape: Slightly modified forms, with a sharp-cornered square tip, are standard for Western style calligraphy, to give you an idea of what you can do with one.

-Lastly, and most simply thanks to all the previous stuff, are dip pens and straight-up brushes! These ultimately feed into the same idea as the fountain pen and brush pen, with one key difference: No ink reservoir. You have to dip into ink each time for your lines. This carries some advantages and disadvantages of its own, but it mostly feeds into the idea of control. Dip pens require very little commitment to a single shape for very long, as well as letting you do things to effect through how much or little ink you allow to fill the feed. All of this goes even further with the brush, though I’m gonna level with you, I don’t know of any manga artists who just use a brush like they’re doing fuckin’ sumi-e. I’m sure they exist, but they’re not likely to be found in the Jump-ass battle manga I typically read.

-Oh, and as ever, don’t quote me on this stuff I’m not an expert support your local library okay BACK TO THE SHOW

-So Tsubasa’s showing how you can use an overfull dip pen to create a really cool blood splatter effect by literally splattering the ink across the page, which is a skill Koyume wouldn’t even need while doing shoujo manga…And then Kaos sees their art pieces, from Tsubasa’s stern manly elf boy to the adorable shoujo girl from Koyume that he’s protecting…Aaand the best she can do is one of her cute chibi little characters in a very rough rendition of a knight’s armor, cheering them on.

-So where else are they going? To the screen tone section! Ruki is all gushing about new flower designs, which she inevitably ends up buying a bunch of. Koyume is imagining using them for cute flowing dresses on her girls. Ruki is imagining using them for sexy underwear. …Well, Ruki will be able to keep using the same pack for a lot longer, then, at least.

-Another aside while we’re talking craft, what are screen tones? You may have heard of them in previous manga-making shows and books, but the idea is really quite simple! They’re literally a pattern printed onto a very thin translucent sheet with a modest adhesive backing. When working in analog, you can get complex patterns easily by cutting out the rough shape of whatever you’re filling out of a matching screen tone sheet, adhering it down over your work, then using an x-acto knife to gently trace over the actual line edges and peel off the stuff you don’t need. You can easily recognize screen tone use because they tend to stay in the midtones, and are very consistent, being mass-produced and printed. Their most common uses are for complex symbolic backgrounds, and clothing patterns, but there are plenty of more complex and elaborate uses various artists have come up with!

-Back to the show. Ruki finds some cool bubbly background tones that Koyume can use…While Tsubasa’s going for the super-contrasty black and white lightning at FULL INTENSITY. And Kaos is buying lots of grim dark spoopy shadows. As for Ruki herself…She needs lots of smooth coverage for all the nudity coming up in her next work. Which means bubbly splotches, as Kaos asks what they’re for, and oh god she can’t admit the truth to this tiny innocent fetus.

-And then Koyume finds the cool patterned masking tape! …It’s patterned masking tape. Washi tape. If anyone you know goes to a craft store regularly or has a Pinterest account, you have seen this stuff. Tape in general is useful for keeping things firmly in place while working on your manuscript in an analog world, and, well, the cute patterns are because they are all teenaged girls. Mostly, Ruki ends up despairing when they start trying to pick sexy patterns for her, not some cute bubbly thing like everyone else got. I’m sorry, Ruki, but you have a reputation now.

-Also Tsubasa hears some girls debating pens and goes over to be all Cool and Manly and Get Their Numbers. …Okay mostly she goes over to offer help from a position of experience but I’m not wrong. So soon she leads them to some useful supplies for starting off drawing manga, and they’re all swept up in Tsubasa’s manly charm and Ruki’s gentle guidance and see themselves in Koyume and you can grow up to draw manga someday too, little pink haired moeblob!

-I’m sorry, Kaos.

-I mean, fuck, what else do you say to that, right?

-Eventually they can actually buy their stuff…Well, Koyume can buy most of her stuff. She’s a little shy after the books and the crepe. She’s gonna have to get rid of all of this cute masking tape…

-So Tsubasa picks it up to buy instead. And Kaos’s, too. A gift for both of you as thanks for the help the other day. Both girls are even more smitten than before. I didn’t think that was possible, but here we are.

-By the time they’re on the way back, it’s late in the day, and Kaos feels motivated to push even harder…Aaaand then they end up using the entire night chatting, and it’s time to get a few hours of sleep in the grim morning…

-When Tsubasa turns the TV on and the morning news is talking about the end of Golden Week.

-They have school.

-In like an hour.

-FUCK

-Episode 02: “Back to School”

-And Kaos gets to try on her new high school uniform, and she feels like she’s a real manga protag—

-And then she sees Ruki in her perfect setup and Tsubasa with her gives-no-fucks jacket and she realizes she’s just a background character next to these cool stylish girls she wants to smooch. …Oh and Koyume does the fucking shoujo manga toast-mouth run.

-Okay, to actual school! Where…

-I should have expected this.

-Tsubasa is the prince of the school.

-ofcourse.gif

-Also that cool splatter pattern on her shirt? …She spilled ink on it and just let it dry. How do you do this? Anyways, Tsubasa is the cool prince, and Ruki is the unapproachable stylish onee…sama…People are totally starting to realize she does something sketchy. Ruki, this is gonna be a lot less bad if they know you draw naughty manga than if they think you’re going and playing hostess to creepy old men or something.

-Oh and it comes out that Ruki and Tsubasa are the same age as our rookies. I’m sorry, they’re not older and more mature, those are just stress lines from the grim reality of a working mangaka lifestyle. Also Koyume is totally enthralled by the sexy slightly-stern homeroom teacher! So enthralled she puts a bow on her. And Kaos just wants to be scolded by the beautiful teacher lady. Truly you are Ruki’s apprentice.

-And then it turns out that while Ruki and Tsubasa are in the same class as Kaos, Koyume is in a different class. Alas, poor Koyume, no stern beautiful teacher lady for you. And that’s when Kaos realizes she hasn’t used her real name in so long she’s doubting her ability to write and pronounce it. She’s been going by Kaos around everyone. Everywhere. And people are staring. Trendy beautiful high school girls are staring, at her, with doubt in their eyes. So this, isn’t, ideal…But she finally pulls herself together despite the nervousness. That kid’s a real mess.

-Especially when she realizes she brought her manga pen case and not her school pen case. So instead of mechanical pencils and ballpoint pens, it’s dip pens, fat black markers and a screen tone pressing tool. …Well shit. And then people notice and Kaos cracks like an egg. If I hadn’t wanted to get a shot of each character for an episode…And then girls start asking her getting-to-know-you questions, which include her hobbies.

-So what are Kaos’s non-manga-drawing hobbies? She ingests tons of otaku media full of cute waifus and collects their slightly ecchi bishoujo figurines. But that’s not something you can say out loud. And the questions keep coming and Kaos just straight up faints. Which means a trip to the nurse’s office…And Koyume coming to check on her, before being dragged off by her new normal friends to get lunch. She’s already gotten friends. Alas, poor Kaos.

-At least you’ve got your fellow weirdos. But, yeah, Kaos suffers from social anxiety. I know these feelings all too well, even if they got expressed rather differently due to my own circumstances. Also when Ruki offers to get her moved closer to them in class, and Kaos’s look of appreciation just breaks Ruki as she has to keep herself from doing things to this sweet innocent zygote. …It doesn’t work very well.

-But Tsubasa’s advice is also that you don’t need to worry nearly so much about actually talking to people, making tons of friends, as you do about observing them…Learning from them. And that really hits home for Kaos, who’s been struggling with how to portray Normal High School Girls…Oh and Tsubasa’s advice is rounded off with her big buff bad guy sketch she’s been working on the whole time. You’re absurd.

-At the end of the schoolday, Koyume immediately comes and clings to her sweet little Kaos…And also she’s immediately made friends and had chats with girls who have actual boyfriends. Tsubasa and Ruki quietly despair at their own lack of success in love. Just steal these two rookies into the night, it’ll be fine. Mostly fine. It’ll work out. The law will never catch you.

-So, back to the dorm? Back to the dorm. When they run into…A stray kitty! TAKE THE KITTY HOME DO IT NOW. I DEMAND IT. And Kaos gets all the kitties. Except for one scared little kitty in the distance, so nervous, even as it lets her pick it up…She knows this fear, you sweet precious creature! KEEP THE CAT.

-Credits!

She better keep that cat.

And hey, another huge log. I blame the amount of setup, and also the amount of time we spent talking about craft materials. Next time should be more room to loosen up since we can broaden out to scene-level recap more. In theory. We’ll see what happens in episode THREE of Comic Girls! Wait for it!

[onehoetrash]

[Baekhyun Fanfic] Heaven - Chapter 5

Byun Baekhyun x OC

'I cannot remember exactly the first time your soul whispered to mine, but I know you woke it. And it has never slept since.’ - JmStorm

[Chapter 1] [Chapter 2] [Chapter 3] [Chapter 4] Chapter 5 [Chapter 6]

I ran as fast as my human legs could carry me, but it wasn’t fast enough. My vision blurred as the bright lights of a truck blinded me, outlining only a silhouette- his silhouette. Tears blurred my vision, my legs growing weak. It was too late- I was too late. I wouldn’t reach him on time, I couldn’t save him this time. I heard the impact. The sound of the truck hitting him- the shatter of a windscreen and then the small thump as his body hit the road, motionless. My legs gave out as I stumbled and crawled over to him. I could feel the hot tears stream down my face at the familiar circumstance, only from a different perspective. I screamed into the empty darkness.

 I was shaken awake, tears streaming down my cheeks, a scream leaving my lips. “Hana? Hey, it’s okay. It was just a dream.” Baekhyun’s soothing voice reached my ears and I snapped myself back to reality, looking up at his concerned face and dishevelled hair. He had called me Hana. When the boys had asked my name earlier that evening, I had told them that I didn’t have one. This was a new life for me, I could be anyone I chose to be. Baekhyun had said he would help me choose a suitable name.

“Hana? Why Hana?” I asked him as I sat up. He smiled shyly at me and sat on my bed.

“I’ll tell you another day- do you want to talk about your nightmare? It must have been pretty bad, you were screaming and,“ he reached up to wipe away one of my tears with his thumb, he had such a gentle touch, “you’re crying.” I looked at him for a moment as he watched me with gentle eyes. He was truly so sweet and warm and gentle. The love I had felt for him before I died had remained, and with each passing second as I sat and looked at him, it grew exponentially. “Hana?” The name passed his lips again. The name he had chosen for me. I smiled internally at the thought. “Hey, are you okay?” He waved his hand in front of my face and I snapped out of it.

 What was I doing? I had known him for less than 24 hours. “Uh, I’m okay, it was just…” I didn’t know how to explain it to him or even if I should, “It was nothing.” I glanced at the clock on the wall, it was 3 o clock in the morning. “It’s the middle of the night, you should go to bed. I’m sorry for waking you up.” He smiled at me, looking unsure of whether he should go or not. I gave him a reassuring smile until he slowly got up off the bed, walked to the door, whispered a goodnight, turned off the light and closed the door behind him. I couldn’t go back to sleep- the nightmare lurked in the back off my head, seeming all too vivid in my recollection of it.

 It wasn’t long before I heard shuffling and the opening and closing of doors. I knew that the boys would have to wake up early to go to promotions. It had only been an hour and I was grateful that Baekhyun would be able to sleep in since I disturbed him. I probably woke them all up, actually. I felt guilty knowing how tired they probably were since promotional periods are always so physically demanding.

 I briefly contemplated leaving my room to say good morning and offer to make them breakfast before I remembered that I was the only female in the dorm and the chance of at least one of them parading around without a reasonable amount of clothing on was dangerously low- so instead I watched the sunlight filter into the room through the small gap in the curtains until the noise outside had faded and I deemed it safe to leave.

 I soundlessly padded across the wooden floor to the kitchen, where a pile of empty cereal bowls greeted me from the sink. I hope they feed them properly when they get to the music show, I worried especially because Sehun was looking ghostly thin. I scratched around in drawers and cupboards and raided the fridge to find something for breakfast. Eventually I found a viable option of pancake mix with enough other ingredients to make for Baekhyun and I.

 Whilst in the middle of making the last pancake, I saw movement in the corner of my eye and turned to see a very tired looking Baekhyun rubbing his eye with a pout on his lips shuffling towards me. As he got closer his eyes locked onto the plate of perfectly golden pancakes and his eyes lit up. “Pancakes!” he yelled happily and the biggest smile spread across his face. I laughed at his cuteness before I handed him a plate quickly- the look on his face told me that if I didn’t give him some he would literally fight me. As I plated my last pancake we sat down at the dining table that was far too small to ever be able to accommodate 12 boys and all the food they would eat.

 We fell into a comfortable silence as we sat across from each other, concentrating on our respective plate of pancakes. He made small cute noises as he ate and I had to stop myself from giggling at him every time. “So, we’re going shopping today right?” He asked almost excitedly as he swallowed his last bite, making it sound as if it were up to me.

“Yeah, unless you want to share your clothes with me.” I was joking but I saw something barely noticeable change in his eyes and it made my stomach do flips. I got up out of my chair, leaning over to take his plate before walking towards the sink.

“I mean you look good in them,” he said casually before panic spread across his face as he realised what he had unintentionally implied, “I mean they fit you well- like they fit your shape- uh,” I held my hand over my mouth, trying to conceal the smile that had spread across my face and hoped he didn’t noticed the shade of pink that tinted my cheeks.

“I know what you meant Baekhyun, it’s okay,” he visibly relaxed and offered to help me with washing all the dishes.

 Once the dishes were done we relaxed on the couch and he put on a Korean movie that he insisted I had to watch after telling him I hadn’t watched any Korean films whatsoever. About half way through the movie I felt the fatigue from the lack of a proper night’s sleep set in. I tried my best to stay awake but eventually my eyes drifted closed.

 I woke up to the sound of the front door opening. When I opened my eyes and took in my surroundings, I realised my head was rested on Baekhyun’s shoulder. I looked up to his face only to meet his gentle gaze and I quickly withdrew my head from his shoulder. “What time is it?” I asked as 5 exhausted looking boys passed us, minds focused on shower and bed.

“10pm.” Baekhyun answered. I slept for that long?! I looked at him in shock before his manager told us it was time to go to the mall and get me clothes and other stuff.

 The mall was absolutely quiet when we arrived. He left Baekhyun and I alone- with a warning- and we started walking down the long, wide corridors looking left and right into the shop windows that we passed. When a store caught my eye we would go in and wonder the aisles, Baekhyun helping me choose clothes. He had a pretty good taste in fashion. Every time we went to checkout he would pull out a credit card with a cheeky grin on his face. “Did Suho really give you his credit card?” I asked as we left a shop- bags weighing down my arms. He nodded as he put his wallet back into his jacket pocket and took the bags from me.

“You wanna buy something to eat? I’m kinda hungry. Carrying all these bags really takes energy.” He pretended to be tired panting as he walked long. I laughed at him before I pointed out the fact that I didn’t make him carry the bags and that we hadn’t even moved 10 steps. He laughed in response and returned to being a semi-normal human-being.

“Yeah, I’m hungry too. What is Suho buying us to eat?” We both giggled.

“Whatever you want, Hana.” I smiled sheepishly at his use of my new name and looked at the ground before telling him that I wanted ice cream.

 Of course we found the most expensive brand of ice cream we possibly could (Baekhyun’s idea, not mine)- and we laughed together at the thought of Suho seeing the transactions pop up on his phone and probably screaming. By the end of the shopping spree Baekhyun’s arm muscles were struggling to carry all the bags as I carried the two lightest ones. I offered to help but he refused- said he had to prove that he was a strong macho man.

 The number of times he had made me laugh that night was uncountable- he really was a fool sometimes. But a cute fool, I thought to myself as I rested my head on my pillow, feeling fresh and comfortable in my new pyjamas. “They’re soft and cute, just like you,” I recalled what Baekhyun had said when he pointed them out, and I playfully hit him on the arm. He feigned hurt but I liked them too so I bought them (well, Suho bought them). They were baby blue and had cute little chibi characters on them. Baekhyun and I had bonded a lot over those few hours together. I fell asleep peacefully with a smile on my face and a warm feeling in my heart.

[NEXT CHAPTER]

[deadphoenx]

Who Are Those Chibi Characters? [10 Anniversary Special]

So you’re now accustomed to the gallery and all its intricacies. But you’re probably wondering what those Chibi characters are adorning the header (and several other areas, like on Twitter, DeviantArt, Pixiv, and the 10 Anniversary Poster). I’ve already explained a little bit on both DeviantArt and Pixiv where they come from. But now I’ll give a full explanation as to when they were created, what they were associated with, what years they represent, and if they’ll still have any use in any projects or stories I create.

I should probably start with the fish, the odd-man out of the entire group. Finne is my mascot. He technically debuted in 2006 under a different name and part of a fan-game idea. However in 2009, I started drawing him more frequently among my friends and family, acting as something of a calling card whenever I was around and I wanted to leave behind a drawing. He was quick and easy to draw compared to other characters I’ve done. He soon became part of my “DeadPhoenX” logo in 2010. My gaming blog “The Wired Fish” was also named after him and incorporated into the site’s logo. Today, he’s still in almost everything I do. As a matter of fact, since 2015 he’s included as an Easter egg in all original art (not fanart) that I do. Think can you find him? He represents years 2010-2013. Artwork With Finne: He's everywhere! 

Chelsí is the next one, full name Chelsí Pleinair. Her creation is an interesting case and is something that almost every girl in this group has in common. She was created in 2004 as “Chelsea” and was a schoolgirl with a French Painter theme. Her design was inspired by a line of Lollipop Girls dolls that my sister was collecting. The story she was included in was actually a hentai story I had concepts of. However that went nowhere with the story being scrapped (but the characters being retained for repurposing in other stories). She was then (somewhat subconsciously) repurposed for a medieval fantasy story as a French-themed princess around late 2005. Like before, it too was hentai themed. However that story was scrapped too (with the characters being retained as well). So she was never drawn again until 2015. There was a ribbed sweater craze going on in the ecchi art community, and I was wondering how I could get in on it. Then I remembered having a French painter girl in my repertoire of characters that wore a sweater. So I brought her back with her old design and under a new name spelling, Chelsí, and made her sweater ribbed. Once uploaded, she became my postergirl for everything I do, representing the art side of things. Since she debuted in very late 2015 but had more art in 2016, she represents 2016. Artwork with Chelsí: What Am I Going to Draw Today (2015), No Valentine's Day Pic (2016), I'm Ready To Paint (2016), Chelsí's Summer Fashion (2016), Joyeuse Saint Valentin (2017), Zis Chandail, It'z So Low! [Virgin Killer Sweater] (2017) 

The catgirl, Rhapsody, was actually something of an error in both name and design. Starting with the name, she was actually a short-and-pink-haired catgirl. She debuted with a set of 5 catgirls and was part of a regular story idea I had. You can still find her tucked away in my DeviantArt gallery. All catgirls I’ve ever drawn had musically themed names. Here’s where the error part comes in. I had another catgirl under a different name that has the current white paws, pink stripes, and blonde hair look. She was part of a hentai story idea that saw all the catgirls from the normal story repurposed to here and completely naked. So she was a new addition to the group. When it came time to draw her and Lullaby together on DeviantArt, I realized too late that I accidentally named the new girl Rhapsody. So I pretty much gave her the Street Fighter II treatment. She would stay as Rhapsody while the old one would have whatever name the new girl originally had. She represents her online debut year, 2007. Artwork with Rhapsody: Wanna Play a Game (2007), Purrrfect Valentine's Day (2015) 

Belinda comes from the second hentai story idea that Chelsí once appeared in. All I could remember was that she was a witch, and that’s about it. Any details about her relevance to the story were all forgotten. In 2015, I wanted to get in on the Halloween art and had the perfect character I could use. So I brought back Belinda from the Scraps ghetto and gave her the full artwork treatment 10 years later (since the story she was in was conceived in 2005). She currently doesn’t have much of a story and is really only made for anything Halloween/spooky themed. Since she made her online debut in 2006, that’s the year she represents. Artwork with Belinda: Belinda's Halloween Rush (2015) Next is Harriette. She came from the same hentai story that Rhapsody came from. Talking more about that story, the theme of it was mythical fantasy-creature girls. Not necessarily monster girls, but things like Mermaids, wood nymphs, fairies, angels, catgirls, etc. Harriette (whose original name was simply Fluffy), was one of only two bunnygirls in that story. She never made her debut online and was never repurposed for any other story. When Easter 2015 was close by, I figured it was time I drew her again. However since Japanese artists and quite a bit of the ecchi/hentai community like it, I decided to make her a bit thicker this time, as well as give her a new name. Her name is actually a pun on “Hare”, which actually gave me a hard time sometimes when I would say her name out loud and trying to squeeze the “Hare” in there. I’ve since given up and just pronounce it like normal. Since someone already has 2015, Harriette’s online debut year, she instead represents 2005, the year before I joined DeviantArt (and having any online presence). Artwork with Harriette: Harriette Easter Surprise (2015), Please... Gimme That Chocolate Carrot (2017)

The No-Name Mermaid comes from the same hentai story as Harriette and Rhapsody. She actually had a name back then, however around that time naming things didn’t really work too well. I can’t remember her name right now, but it was probably something simple and dumb. So now she doesn’t have a name. She was paired with another mermaid in that story that I might draw in the future. I wanted to do something water themed in 2015 that would help me flex my background-making muscles at the time. In bringing her back, I changed up her tail fin design a bit, and also made the tied hair more straight instead of making it flow out like big strands. She represents her online debut year, 2015. Maybe she’ll finally have a name before the decade ends! Artwork with the No-Name Mermaid: Sailing Through The Sea (2015) 

Lola’s origin is actually kinda forgotten. I can’t quite remember if she came from either a hentai story or a different story. Regardless, she ended up getting repurposed for the only story idea to make it to DeviantArt, Devangie’s Fairy Tale. She herself made her debut in 2007 with a light counterpart. However I made the mistake of building up her individual story, as well as others, before building up the world she would inhabit. This is something that I did a lot during my highschool/pre-online days. This would result in a lot of stories getting the axe and the characters shelved or repurposed. This would also include Devangie’s Fairy Tale. That story has been abandoned with all the human characters (except one of them) getting shelved. The fairies that were in that story might get repurposed back into the hentai that they were once in. I currently have plans to repurpose Lola into a normal story, this time without her light half. She represents year 2007. Artwork with Lola: Hell Hath No Fury (2007), Darket of Lolitas (2007)

Lady Jess comes from a series of girls I drew in 2009 called the BladeLadies. At the time, I was really into rock and heavy metal, getting a metal poster calendar and got inspired by the music video Ghost Town by the group Shiny Toy Guns. I remember sketching out a more realistic semi-nude Heavy-Metal inspired woman in a small sketchbook I had. Right next to her I drew this tiny puppet like thing with a cartoonish blade, a helmet covering half her head, and very pointy torpedo-tits. I wondered what this would look like if it was drawn larger. So I did that on the next page. I then got the idea to draw more of them with different boob deformations and weapons. The end result was seven of them being made. Also around this time was when I would change programs right in the middle of the series, forcibly getting switched from Picture Publisher 7 to GIMP. This was when my artwork creating skills would improve with better hardware. Lady Jess represents 2009. Artwork with Lady Mimi: Bladeladies - Lady Jess (2009)

Lady Mimi is my newest creation, making her debut in 2014 with the series BladeLadies 2nd. She was actually conceived soon after the first wave of BladeLadies ended, most likely around 2009/2010. The old theme of BladeLadies 2nd was actually based on gore, building up from the first wave’s theme of rock and heavy metal. I had drawn some BladeLadies concepts, with a few catching on. One of them was Lady Mimi with the giant piecing in her tongue and the tongue length being much shorter than now. At this time however, I had really bad artist block as well as college work eating up a huge chunk of my time. On top of that, I ended up realizing how bad I actually was at drawing gore. Upon my return to making pics on DeviantArt, I decided to bring back the BladeLadies. The theme was switched from gore to a circus, and this some had something of a story unlike the first wave. But it’s very minimal right now so that I can build the world first. Lady Mimi represents 2014. Artwork with Lady Mimi: BladeLadies 2nd (2014).

Meet the newest girl to the chibi parade, Xiuying Gushan! Like many of the other girls, Xiuying had her start in a hentai story. And like the others, when that story folded, they were all shelved. Due to my lack of knowledge on the specifics of Chinese and Japanese culture and language back then, Xiuying's original name wasn't even Chinese, but Japanese. I had desires to bring her back for a while, but I didn't find a good time to do it. I finally had a chance during this year's Lunar New Year celebration. The release did something of a snag, but I was able to upload the pic close enough to the Lunar New Year Date to be relevent enough. Currently, Xiuying is being utuilized in a story as high-ranking general. The story details won't be known anytime soon however. Xiuying represent 2017. Artwork with Xiuying: Natsuko Nakahara (2005, old name), Elegant Flower of the Lone Mountain (2017).

[thebookbeard-blog]

January was a weird month. I went through the first few days of 2017 feeling like I was coming down from a hangover of 2016, and I wish I meant that literally (I stayed in on New Year's Eve, partly because my mother spent the day at the hospital, partly because screw the idea of celebrating 2016). And then January just kept on going, and it just got weirder and weirder. You know what I'm talking about.

So I wanted to start out my reading year as gently as possible. I don't think I could have handled anything else. I wanted to pick out books that, to me at least, seemed warm and inviting.

Dr. Seuss & Mr. Geisel by Judith and Neil Morgan seemed like it fit the bill. I had already been inspired by kaptainkristian's superb video essay on Dr. Seuss and his rhyming techniques to finally pick this up (it had been sitting on my shelves for a while). Writer biographies are among my favorite things to read, anyway, so this seemed like a good place to start.

And it was. And it was indeed a gentle book, too -- although this didn’t always work to it’s advantage.

The Morgans were apparently good friends and neighbors of the Geisels, and so had access to a wealth of information and intimacies that would not have been available to many other would-be biographers. And this very much shows through in the book -- it reads very intimate. It’s an admiring and affectionate look at the life and labors of a well-beloved author.

A bit too admiring and affectionate at times, it turns out.

This is a mostly thorough book, covering Geisel's work from a very young age, up to college and adulthood and beyond. This life work is divided into chapters covering whatever big work Geisel was putting out that year (he really was a prolific man). A couple of these deal heavily with Geisel's political cartoons he created during the Second World War. The Morgans are quick to praise their artistry and ingenuity as well as the influence that they held, all the while glossing over the fact that a lot of them happened to also be extremely racist and anti-Japanese. This is a fact of Dr. Seuss that I had known for a while, and so I was on the look-out for discussion about it within the book. Alas. I wanted to make note of this in light of the fact that some of these cartoons have recently regained some prominence, given certain current events.

One other instance of the book being too gentle on its subject has to do with the chapter covering the death by suicide of Helen Palmer -- Geisel's first wife and a children’s author in her own right. It's a sad and somber account, and you feel like the the authors are writing about the death of an actual friend and person, and of a subject, which is commendable. I learned later, though, that one of the major reasons Helen decided to take her own life was the fact that Geisel was apparently having an affair with one of their close friends -- the same woman that later became his second wife. This is, given the Morgans relationship with the Geisels, an understandable enough omission, to be sure, but it is also a very glaring one in retrospect.

And I guess an argument could be made about the ethics and moralities of having such personal things in a book that, to be fair, largely focuses on the creative aspect of its subject. But I'm of the opinion that unpleasant details like this should be acknowledged and discussed. Especially so in biographies of well-known and well-loved. They are the things that show us that the people we admire are every bit as flawed and damaged as the rest of us, but are still capable of making the occasional magic.

Those are just two examples that I thought were interesting to think about. As I said, though, the bulk of the book deals with the creative work of an imminently fascinating and intensely prolific figure, and it does so wonderfully -- the chapters dealing the creation Seuss's "major" books being particularly illuminating. 

Dr. Seuss was and still is an influential and inspiring figure, warts and all. He was an artist -- a proper artist -- who did a tremendous amount of good, not just for children’s literature, but for literature in general. And he was, much like the Cat in the Hat, a trickster figure, larger than life itself. Large enough to cast a deep shadow over an entire industry.

It’s just important to recognize the rest of it all, too.

Seconds by Bryan Lee O'Malley was the second book I read this year -- something that was completely unintentional but still greatly pleases me. Lost at Sea was the third. Both were re-reads.

Seconds is about Katie Clay, head chef of a relatively successful restaurant who dreams of one day opening up her own. After a series of setbacks that keeps delaying this dream she is visited by a house spirit who gives her the ability the change past mistakes by ingesting some mushrooms.

So, you know, hardcore realism.

O'Malley's books seem to come into my life at pivotal moments. Scott Pilgrim was a very formative book for me: I was an insufferable hipster kid with insufferable hipster friends, and was close enough to the age of the characters that I saw my life reflected on its cartoony pages -- which was an interesting and dissecting kind of experience, to say the least. It's a hell of a thing to see a reflection of yourself in the hero of a story only to realize that both the hero and yourself have actually been complete and utter gits all this time ha ha ha let me tell you.

Seconds also came out at an age-appropriate time, and again I saw myself reflected in the main character, Katie, with her dreams and her passions and her fear of failure and mundane complacency. I was in my second year of a projected three-year stint at an office job, but, much like Katie and her bigger and fancier restaurant, I had higher and loftier aspirations.

When I came to re-read it a couple of weeks ago, I was closer to the character not only in terms of age (we were both 29 now), but in situation as well. I was still at my office job (fifth year of the projected three year stint) and while being extremely good and efficient at it, and appreciating the job’s relative safety, I found myself, like Katie, being frustrated by the mundane realities and setbacks of life. Trying to keep up with dreams is a challenge, but I wish it didn't always have to feel that way. It's exhausting.

Seconds is a story about taking control of your narrative at the expense of other people, and the meaning and consequences of it. It's a story about do-overs and what-ifs and what-might-have-beens. The main character finds all this out via the use of magic mushrooms, and while I'm not exactly fitting to go out into the real world in search of some enchanted fungi, I'm not going to say I wouldn't do the same as Katie did were I to come across such a thing.

This was, I believe, my third time reading the book. I've taken away something new after each read, and my love for it keeps growing exponentially. It's definitely O'Malley's most mature work, both in terms of themes and story, as well as art -- combining his hyper-graphic, chibi style of cartooning with the semi-realistic backgrounds and props of Jason Fischer and the gorgeous expressionist coloring of Nathan Fairbairn. 

They all compliment and enhance each other so well. Seconds has become my favorite of Bryan's books.

Lost at Sea is the only O'Malley book I've read at a time when I wasn't anywhere close to the age of the characters, since they are all teenagers. And this is very much a teenager story, all about trying to find yourself and the embarking on road trips in order to do so. It's a story about that deep and lonely aimlessness all moody and sensitive adolescents inevitably feel. 

It’s a feeling that we never really manage to outgrow, the vestiges of which manage to remain etched onto our aging souls, surfacing mostly during terribly long and existential nights. I was very much feeling when I first picked it up last year, and I was still feeling that when I decided to read it again this year. It helped both times. One of those books you read as an adult and wish you could go back in time and make a younger version of you read it as well. Maybe with the help of some mushrooms....

I love Bryan Lee O'Malley's books a lot. I hope he keeps making them for ever.

Between these I was also reading the collection Jillian Tamaki's SuperMutant Magic Academy, her gorgeous and gorgeously weird webcomic. Ostensibly the story of a group of super powered/magical/gifted teenagers at a boarding school, it’s described as a mash-up between Harry Potter and the X-Men, but really it's nothing like these. It is its own strange little thing.

I love that you can tell it began as an excuse for Tamaki to just let loose on the page. Tamaki is known for her crisp and clean line art that she uses for her books, but the art in a lot of SuperMutant strips -- and especially in the early ones -- are rough, almost sloppy, as if they were done quickly and in the moment. It fits the throw-away nature of the humor. The art style starts to get tighter as the strip goes on, and the light gags begin give way to darker jokes and meditations. Tamaki never chooses to permanently stay in one form or the other, though, neither in terms of art or story -- they never stop fluctuating. This gives the comic a kind of fluidity that make the strips range from the relatively straightforward

to the surreal

to the somber

more or less on a strip-to-strip basis.

(My favorites of these are the ones featuring Everlasting Boy, her immortal, silent character, whose strips consist of what I can only call playful existentialism.)

The strips are mostly self-contained, one-shot things, although the last few dozen that end the collection feature a poignant take on the Chosen One story that is so wonderfully and beautifully done that it borders on frustrating (it is so short). It's so good that it could have been expanded to it's own graphic novel. Maybe one day. What do you think, E.B.?