#i call her ourple or glass

[sketchingdemonss]

day5 ... DA SIBLIGNS

[the-acid-pear]

Had a dream about disability. Tried to run because we were playing this game (except people were getting legit infected by something and turning into like purple blueberries but they seemed ok so nevermind that) but when I tried to run my back twisted back and made me scream and stumble, forcing me to walk my way back to the cabin (this was like a school trip, it was night, we were in a field). I explained to them I couldn't walk and they didn't give much if any of a reaction just ok, as if they had significantly more important things to deal with. In their defense we had two ourple children in the room and one getting worse. I had previously been infected so I just hung around inside the house for some reason, we spoke. Eventually everyone left, and I tried to leave too, but it was dark. As I walked into the night, I started to lose my sight. From a faint glow of the night to pitch darkness. I called out for a dog, it didn't come. I tried to push through anyway. I kept calling out for anyone as I walked on the hard ground, shoeless, it hurt. I didn't know where I'd end I was hoping I'd simply run into the house, and I did. Still blind I tried to squeeze thru a gap but I quickly realized it wasn't the door, so I moved more and found it. Inside I saw my grandma, in this dream, an indigenous looking woman who was only shown as a little chibi drawing of just her face, who shook her finger at me lecturing me for relying on the dog so much, telling me she got rid of it. I didn't say anything. I tried to look for my glasses, I had two pairs. They'd help me see in the dark. I went into a greenhouse while still stumbling around. Some friends came pick me up, I still couldn't see. I stumbled around, they didn't slow down or question my need. I want back. I went to a greenhouse, there was light, and there was a dog. I got on my knees and held its face before breaking down. "grandma, you can't kill a guard dog."

Then I saw a comic like sequence seeing myself as the character I embodied (the one eyed elf from dunmeshi, idk his name) and a robot like representation of myself: a screen head thin and square covered with a yellow sticky note and basic body with tube libs chunky circular joints and a box for ribcage; exposed wires and my colors were cold and blueish greys. We were standing against a red orange sunset though, the lighting was morphing details. I don't remember the details, but it was simply a long ramble about identity and who I am and who they want me to be but in true disabled fashion even if I tried to be that robot I'd still fail because there's some things you simply can't ignore. I ended as the robot in the end, in the final panel.

Then it cut to some fucking cartoony fantasy cheese/grub???? tasting and it really pissed me off bc i was really invested in the other dream.