#i blame criminal minds and my tv show addiction as a child

[aengelren]

wait what is this😭is there a markiplier pandemic going on i feel like i’m being toyed with

what’s your guy’s favorite youtuber and tiktoker?

[not-easy-being-green-124]

Rage.

I am suddenly filled with just...an unsettling amount of Rage at how much baby me went through because no one knew. 

No one knew that I didn’t process the world like they did. No one knew how much I was struggling. No one knew how much fear I was hiding. No one knew because no one asked. No one knew because I didn’t know better. I thought the world was just...like this. I thought everyone had some secret that I didn’t have. I thought I was a bitch. I thought I was defective. I thought there was something wrong with me. I thought I was weak. I thought I was a bitch. I can’t tell you how many times I had that exact thought in my head. I thought I was a sinner. I thought I was a bad christian. I thought I. Was. Bad. That, that’s another one. The fear that I was bad, defective, broken, wrong. I can’t explain how much that thought dominated my teen years. Bad for liking MacGyver. Bad for liking whump. Bad for reading to much. Bad for getting lost in my head. Bad for getting obsessed with the Beatles. Bad for laughing too loud. Bad for being disrespectful and not knowing. I was wrong, bad, broken, a bitch, too hard to handle, too much to deal with, too much for my parents. I needed to suck it up, try harder, do better, stop crying, stop being me. I was never enough. I was always too much.

I’m angry. I’m angry because my mom knew something was wrong. I’m angry because I got punished for chewing on barbies and “didn’t know why”. I’m angry for all the times I was punished for something I didn’t know I did wrong. I’m angry that when I said I didn’t know why I had done something, I was punished. And I’m angry because we went to therapists. Because no one who was supposed to help me was able to see what was really going on. I don’t know whose fault that is. I don’t know that I really blame anyone particularly?

I guess....I wish somewhere, someone would have looked me in the eyes and said “hey. this isn’t normal. you aren’t responsible for this. you’re thirteen. life shouldn’t be this hard, this scary. we’re going to help you.” But nobody did. Because in rural america, the only time people sought mental health was when they were abused, broken, gang members, drug addicts. No one knew what to do with an autistic adhd and budding bipolar child who hadn’t had the typical amount of “trauma”. They shuffled me around, stuck me in a mental institution, put me on meds that just made me numb. They asked me what I thought. I didn’t know. I was terrified of life. I was 13 and I was afraid to live. I didn’t want to die. I just didn’t want to be afraid anymore. 

No one gave me a hug.

No one cared that years later, I was still scared from 9/11. No one cared that my grandma died when I was six or my grandpa when I was 13. I literally told a therapist that my grandma died, then 9/11 happened, then my grandpa died and all of that really upset me. Her response? “Those events were spread out over 6 years. That can’t have triggered anything.” I remember that moment so damn clearly. A licensed therapist told me that what I identified as triggers didn’t count. (I saw her twice more, then quit. I hated her.) No one cared, no one asked, and I just decided to keep it all inside.

I kept all the bad sensory input, all the emotions, all the confusion inside until it erupted in anxiety attacks that I thought would drown me. And all they told us? “Don’t let her talk about it too much”. Apparently that’s how you break an “anxious ocd” child of compulsive thoughts? So I learned to shut up. I learned not to talk about how I felt. I saw how it wore my mom down. I saw how she crumbled when I asked to “talk”. I saw how it affected her. And I saw how other people didn’t have that need. How other people didn’t have to talk, didn’t seem to have this gnawing pit of anxiety inside of them. How other people didn’t freak out over certain things. And I saw how other people responded when I laughed, when I was happy, when I smiled, when I acted like them.

So I learned. I learned to survive. I learned not to cry in front of people. I learned not to admit I was afraid. I learned not to admit I was struggling. I learned how to act. And I kept acting until my body gave out on me from the stress, until I started to dissociate from reality. Until the hurricane inside me scared me so much.

And now you tell me that all of this? Is because I’m wired differently? That I could have had help? That I could have stimmed, danced, laughed, not hated myself for years? That my brain is wired in such a way that makes obsessions (hyperfixations) natural, normal, and healthy for me? 

I see people collect things. I see people go to Comic Con. I see people surround themselves with figurines and posters and songs. I see people draw their favorite characters and binge watch TV shows. I see this and I am amazed. I didn’t know this was possible. I didn’t know you could do that. I didn’t know it was allowed. I didn’t know you could fill your house with Doctor Who posters, talk for hours about Criminal Minds, write fanfiction for Endeavour. I didn’t know you could have stim toys. 

I didn’t know that I was allowed to be loved.

I’m angry because even now, I feel the need to add a disclaimer here. To say it “wasn’t that bad”. To say that I was loved, I was happy, people did try. It’s true. But so is everything else I said.

I’m angry. And I think...I think that’s okay. I think that might be part of healing. I think that might be the first step towards rebuilding all the broken ruins of who I was once.

[lahuertas]

perfect match for that mc ask meme ^^

GET TO KNOW MY MC’S ASK MEME.   /   KAI PARK.

how tall are they?

she’s pretty average in height - about 5′5″.

how do they tend to dress?

she likes to keep a balance between comfortable and cool. her go-to outfit would be black ripped jeans, a cropped tee, a leather or bomber jacket and either converse or vans, both of which she has more pairs than any human could ever possibly need. when it comes to special occasions or hitting the town however, comfort goes out the window; it’s all about looking good. seriously, getting ready is an all day event for her and nadia whenever they’re going out somewhere in the evening.

do they like how they look?

yes! of all my mc’s, she’s definitely one of the most confident in regards to her appearance. 

are they an only child or do they have any siblings?

an only child, however nadia is practically a sister to her.

are they a morning person or night owl?

good luck waking her up before 10am. seriously.

are they a cat person or a dog person?

if she wasn’t already a dog person, dipper definitely swayed things that way.

got any favourite foods?

kai is a serious junk food addict. if she could live off of pizza, burgers and doughnuts, she would. 

how about favourite drinks?

peach iced tea is a fave for her! 

what are their favourite movies/tv shows?

she’s actually a horror movie fanatic! nadia hates it whenever it’s kai’s choice for movie night because she’s totally squeamish and for kai, the gorier the movie is the better. as for tv, she’s a big fan of shows like criminal minds. 

do they have any hidden talents?

she’s extremely flexible - she did gymnastics all the way through from childhood to high school.

do they believe in love at first sight?

definitely!

who is their love interest?

damien nazario. 

what are they afraid of?

losing the people she loves, especially after the events of perfect match. post-book I headcanon her as struggling with some pretty severe night terrors regarding this. 

what are their guilty pleasures?

trashy reality tv. blame nadia for getting her hooked. 

what was their dream job as a kid? is it still their dream?

as a kid, her and nadia had big plans to become a world famous popstar duo. suffice to say, that’s no longer her dream.

have they ever broken a bone?

nope. 

have they ever been in trouble with the law?

besides a speeding ticket in college, no.

+ three other random facts about them!

she took a year off between high school and college to save money and to travel europe for a couple of months, she has a birthmark on her inner left thigh that she swears is she shaped like a heart (damien doesn’t see it - he says it just looks like a blob) and she loves doing crossword puzzles. 

[asctx]

http://www.thetimes.co.uk/article/hollywoods-evil-secret-mxsb5f3zl Sunday Times (London, England). (May 22, 2016) ================== Oliver Thring met Elijah Wood to talk about his latest film, but the Lord of the Rings star and former child actor had other ideas. Out poured revelations about convicted paedophiles working openly in Hollywood — and deep relief that he had escaped unscathed ================== Elijah Wood was just eight when he arrived in Hollywood, the blue­-eyed son of Iowa delicatessen owners. He had been modelling in Midwestern shopping centres for four years when his mother brought him to California to launch his career in show business. Long before Peter Jackson cast him as Frodo Baggins, the hobbit protagonist of the Lord of the Rings trilogy, Wood was a child star. He took the lead in a remake of the dolphin film Flipper and before that shared top billing with Macaulay Culkin in The Good Son. Now he knows he was lucky to escape childhood unharmed. Allegations that powerful figures in Hollywood have been sheltering child abusers have become impossible to ignore in recent years. During the past decade several convictions have been secured —­­ and far more accusations levelled ­­— against wealthy and important people in the industry. Some of these criminals have left prison, returned to Hollywood and begun working again with children. Sitting in a Los Angeles restaurant to promote his latest film, The Trust, Wood compares revelations of child abuse in Hollywood to those that surfaced in Britain after the death of Jimmy Savile. "You all grew up with Savile —­­ Jesus, it must have been devastating. Clearly something major was going on in Hollywood. It was all organised. There are a lot of vipers in this industry, people who only have their own interests in mind. There is darkness in the underbelly —­­ if you can imagine it, it's probably happened. "What upsets me about these situations is that the victims can't speak as loudly as the people in power," he adds. "That's the tragedy of attempting to reveal what is happening to innocent people: they can be squashed, but their lives have been irreparably damaged." Wood says his mother, Debra, protected him: "She was far more concerned with raising me to be a good human than facilitating my career. I never went to parties where that kind of thing was going on. This bizarre industry presents so many paths to temptation. If you don't have some kind of foundation, typically from family, then it will be difficult to deal with." Other child actors did not have his luck. Corey Feldman was perhaps the biggest child star of the 1980s, a hero in such hits as Gremlins, The Goonies, Stand by Me and The Lost Boys. In 2011 Feldman decided to speak out about the abuse he had suffered as a young actor. "The No 1 problem in Hollywood was and is —­­ and always will be —­­ paedophilia," he said, adding that by the time he was 14 he was "surrounded" by molesters. Feldman met another child actor, Corey Haim, on a film set in the mid-­1980s. They became best friends, starring in numerous movies together and sharing their own television show. Describing their first meeting in his memoir, Feldman wrote: "An adult male had convinced Corey that it was perfectly normal for older men and younger boys in the business to have sexual relations ... So they walked off to a secluded area between two trailers ... and Haim allowed himself to be sodomised." Haim asked Feldman: "So I guess we should play around like that too?" He replied: "No, that's not what kids do, man." In 2012 Feldman told a British tabloid: "When I was 14 and 15, things were happening to me. These older men were leching around like vultures. It was basically me lying there pretending I was asleep and them going about their business." Both actors went on to suffer mental health problems, alcoholism and addiction to drugs including crack and heroin. In 2010, aged 38, Haim died of pneumonia, having reportedly entered rehab 15 times. Feldman said a "Hollywood mogul" was to blame for his friend's death, adding: "The people who did this to me are still out there and still working ­­— some of the richest, most powerful people in this business." "PEOPLE look at Corey Feldman and think he's a drug addict, so why should they listen to him?" says Anne Henry, co­founder of the BizParentz Foundation, an organisation established to protect child actors. "But that plays into the predators' hands. They don't want victims to be believed. We estimate that about 75% of the child actors who 'went off the rails' suffered earlier abuse. Drug addiction, alcoholism, suicide attempts, wandering through life without a purpose —­­ they can all be symptoms." In the mid-­2000s Henry was the proud mother of an 11-­year-­old child actor when she spotted shirtless photographs of him trading on eBay for up to $400 each. "My kid wasn't famous," she says. "But pictures of Leonardo DiCaprio when he was 11 were only selling for 10 bucks so I was worried." She realised that a number of eBay users were trading photographs of young boys, who were often semi­-naked and staring up into the camera in positions that mimicked child abuse. Henry says her research led her "to websites where men boasted about following these kids, where they 'screencapped' little boys on the TV every night. We found fetish sites: one still exists that is focused on little boys working in the entertainment industry, full of pictures of them in wet swimsuits. We eventually learnt that our kids' photographs were being used as gateways to child pornography sites." Bob Villard, an agent who managed the young DiCaprio and Tobey Maguire, was convicted of selling images of children on eBay. As far back as 1987 Villard had been found in possession of child pornography and in 2005 he was sentenced to eight years in prison for committing a "lewd act" on a 13­-year-­old boy who had asked him for acting lessons. There is no suggestion that DiCaprio or Maguire was ever a victim of abuse. Henry felt ill at what she had discovered. She began educating other parents of child actors —­­ including several famous ones ­­— about what was taking place. And then, she says, the stories of sexual assault began to pour in. In the past 10 years Henry claims she has heard hundreds of episodes of alleged abuse of child actors in Hollywood, ranging from inappropriate comments to sexual violence and rape. "We believe Hollywood is currently sheltering about 100 active abusers," she says at home in Los Angeles. "The tsunami of claims has begun. This problem has been endemic in Hollywood for a long time and it's finally coming to light." WHAT should have brought the issue even greater attention is a documentary called An Open Secret by the Oscar-nominated director Amy Berg. The film, which is not easy to watch, either in practical terms or because of its content, tells the stories of five former child actors who claim to be victims of serious abuse. Some of their attackers have gone to jail. Evan Henzi, 22, tells me by email that "sexual abuse is a huge problem in Hollywood and there is absolutely no support system". He was molested dozens of times over several years from the age of 11 by his agent, a paedophile named Martin Weiss. In home­-movie footage recorded at a birthday party in the Henzi family home, one young boy turns to the camera and says: "I'm getting a massage and it feels great, and I don't care whether or not it looks bad." "It's above the waist," says Weiss, who is touching the boy. "It's not bad." Henzi eventually helped to secure Weiss's conviction after, he writes, "a moment of truth for myself. I secretly recorded an hour-­long conversation in which my abuser admitted he sexually abused me. I decided to beat fear with truth." But Weiss spent just six months in prison. "I was worried that he could try to harm me because he threatened me when I was younger," Henzi once said. Weiss is now rumoured to be working again in the entertainment industry. The most explosive allegations of Hollywood paedophilia surround "pool parties" at a Los Angeles mansion in the late 1990s. These were hosted primarily by one man, Marc Collins-­Rector. He had co­founded Digital Entertainment Network (DEN), a precursor to YouTube and Netflix, which generated its own content —­­ some of it with overtly pederastic tones —­­ for online release. DEN attracted almost $100m of investment from Hollywood giants, including David Geffen and Michael Huffington, as well as Bryan Singer, now one of the most feted directors in Hollywood, and the film maker behind The Usual Suspects and the billion dollar­-grossing X-­Men franchise. Geffen, Huffington and Singer are all alleged to have been at the parties but none is accused of any wrongdoing. At these parties, Collins­-Rector and other men are said to have sexually assaulted at least six teenage boys, according to lawsuits filed in 2000 and 2014. Michael Egan, who was a teenager at the time of the alleged abuse in 1999, sued Singer and two other men, alleging serious sexual abuse. He had to drop this suit after he was found to have been contradicting himself. A federal judge also accused him of lying in court. Singer has denied all claims of child abuse and said the accusations against him were a "sick, twisted shakedown". Another convicted paedophile, Brian Peck, was also a guest at the parties. Singer had given him cameo roles in two of the X­-Men films and asked him to join him for the director's commentary on one of the movies' DVDs. In 2004 Peck was found guilty of abusing a famous young actor on the Nickelodeon network. After prison Peck returned to Hollywood, where he accepted a role as a dialogue coach on the sitcom Anger Management, starring Charlie Sheen. Peck later went on to play, of all things, a sex education teacher in a film. Henry is outraged that Peck still works in Hollywood: "I'm disgusted with the people who continue to hire him. I hope audiences will vote with their wallets. Don't watch these films: make it clear to the studios that you won't have anything to do with organisations that re­-employ convicted predators." And if you were considering seeing An Open Secret, that may not be easy. Matthew Valentinas, its executive producer, has said: "There was major interest at Cannes [in 2014]. They'd say, 'We love it, don't show it to anyone else.' But then someone on the business side would step in and all of a sudden there was no longer interest." The film failed to find a distributor and apparently never will, though online message boards suggest viewers are keen to see it and it can be found on YouTube. To make matters worse, its other executive producer, Gabe Hoffman, apparently fell out with its director and was last year reported to be taking her to court for not "co­operating" in the film's promotion. Valentinas referred me to Hoffman when I asked to speak to him about child abuse in Hollywood; neither Hoffman nor Berg returned my emails. HOLLYWOOD'S reluctance to promote An Open Secret can be contrasted with its enthusiasm for films dealing with child abuse that took place elsewhere. As Henzi says: "In recent years, the movie industry has done a great job bringing these issues to the fore, but when it comes to sex crimes committed by its own, everyone is more hush-­hush." Spotlight, the account of an American newspaper's dogged investigation into child rapists in the Catholic church, won the best picture at the Oscars in March. Berg herself was previously nominated for an Academy Award for her 2006 documentary into a similar scandal, Deliver Us From Evil. Consequently, questions of a cover-­up have surfaced. "I don't believe that the most powerful people in Hollywood are sitting in a darkened room plotting to spread paedophilia," says Henry. "But very bad people are still working here, protected by their friends. Worse, the media and entertainment industries have a cosy relationship in this country —­­ and we've already had one Hollywood actor become president. This is why we've been relying on British media to report this story much more than American media." Hoffman has said An Open Secret "makes it clear that Hollywood is not adequately policing itself". And Wood told me that having seen An Open Secret, he believes the film "only scratches the surface. I feel there was much more to this story than it articulates." Roman Polanski was charged in 1977 with five offences, including rape, drugging and sodomising, against a 13­-year­-old girl. He did a plea bargain and was convicted of unlawful sexual intercourse with a minor. Fearing a jail sentence, Polanski fled the US and has never returned. He continues to make films in Europe and has received an Oscar while being the subject of an Interpol "red notice" for absconding. "Everyone wants to f*** young girls," he once opined in an interview. The tragedy of that gruesome Hollywood trope, the "casting couch", is its victims: young actors of both sexes forced to grant sexual favours to directors and producers, and damaged as a result. Henry says she and her family have received numerous death threats from "emissaries of people accused of abuse ... We've had to move home twice, increase our security. People have parked outside our house and watched us. We're tired and weary —­­ but with the evidence we have, we could have made 10 films like An Open Secret." Henzi writes in an email: "The thing about Hollywood is that there is not some secret 'illuminati' or top agenda. Just because someone is a famous director or actor does not give them immunity from the law. My dream is to see an established presence in Hollywood advocating against child sexual abuse, rape, sexual harassment and all sex crimes." He may have some time to wait. I ask Wood whether he believes this is still a problem for Hollywood. "From my reading and research," he says, "I've been led down dark paths to realise that these things probably still are happening. If you're innocent, you have very little knowledge of the world and you want to succeed, people with parasitic interests will see you as their prey."

[kill-it-with-an-x-burner]

that one BNHA/KHR I was writing

I love KHR and have also been a fan of BNHA even before the anime came out. Since I haven’t written anything in a long time, I thought “hey, why not give it a try again?” So I brainstormed on what plot it should have.

Both Tsuna and Izuku are my favorite characters in their respective series, but I have a better grasp on writing Tsuna so I decided to focus on him.

This story is basically Tsuna gets stranded in another world -> becomes homeless. WIP title is Aimless but might change once I finish it. (maybe call it Homeless!Tsuna AU for now idk)

I’m actually 5k+ words into it and decided to share a preview.

Attracting chaos must be Tsuna's special talent.

He always thought of himself as an average person, but ever since Reborn came to his life, all the powers that be in the universe have somehow conspired together to keep throwing him in every bullshit situation possible.

Or more specifically, how he ended up in a different world and somehow turned their society on its head. 

(By accident, to boot.)

Being homeless was hard.

They faced prejudice every single day. Not a lot of people were willing to help them, and at times, the government would ignore their plights, too. Some belittled and treated them as a lesser species— comparable to a stain on society that's no better than a villain. They thought that all were drunkards or drug addicts.

The worst part of it was being vulnerable and helpless to criminals. There were a handful who could defend themselves, but the rest can't. Small-time thieves see them as easy prey. Delinquents see them as a convenient punching bag. To top it all off, fellow vagrants who turned to crimes harassed them as well.

Tsuna was used to having a roof over his head and three meals a day; he had to adapt if he wanted to survive. Like any other homeless, he had nothing but the clothes on his back— no money, no place to stay, and no credentials. He resorted to begging, scavenging, and sleeping in numerous spots such as bus stops and behind the dumpsters because Japan had no homeless shelters.

Seeking help from the police would only land him in the foster care system, although many there never get adopted and after reaching their age of majority, often end up as homeless themselves.

Living in the streets was more dangerous than usual, because it was just Tsuna's luck to get stranded in a world of superhumans. Criminals were formidable enough on their own; what more when you give them superpowers?

Dammit, Kawahira.

It was all his fault, really. One moment, the man was saying something about his new destiny after rejecting the Vongola boss position and the next, Tsuna found himself standing in the back of a rundown building, with not a single hint on what he had to do.

The brunet was relieved that until now, he has his intuition to guide him. If it were gone, he would have long been wasted in the streets. He's had a few close calls as proof— from almost encountering a mugger to a group of thugs who were prowling the city at night. 

Unfortunately for him, it's also his intuition that led him to various kinds of trouble.

It went like this: Tsuna was on his way to the park where he usually slept.

He was grateful that he got a surgical mask and a (terrible, puke-colored) scarf from a nice old lady that morning for it was a chilly night. Normally, he wandered the streets past midnight in case he might be taken in for loitering, but the local police stopped their night patrol ahead of schedule.

Of course, that much luck had to be countered by an unfortunate chain of events, because Tsuna was simply that unlucky.

A few blocks away from the park, Tsuna's intuition tingled. He didn't know why it wanted him to hurry, but he learned long ago not to oppose it. Sometimes, it was blatant (avoiding a chance encounter with dangerous people) and others, it made him do illogical things (staying put in one spot for hours). Most of the time, it merely made him hyperaware to the point that he could tell what someone ate for their breakfast.

In all honesty, it's a bit disturbing; but it has yet to lead him astray.

Tsuna immediately heard the familiar click of a gun and terrified gasps, and he felt his stomach drop.

He discreetly turned around a corner and hid behind a dumpster. Tsuna's eyes roamed the scene until he spotted a man blocking the path of a woman and presumably, her child. The mother and daughter pair were shivering out of fear and the cold, whilst the man had a foreboding grin on his face as he commanded them to hand over their valuables.

It was akin to a scene from a TV show or a movie; the man was robbing them at gunpoint in the middle of the street, paying no mind to any spectators. Tsuna himself caught a glimpse of a few witnesses in the distance; one was even hastily grabbing their phone from their bag. With that, he reckoned that the police would come to investigate soon. 

The wisest course of action is to walk away. He was homeless for crying out loud— he didn't want to get involved with more trouble. Report the crime and give a statement once the commotion has died off. From what he could tell, the mugger will be able to get away before the police could arrive. But then he saw the unadulterated fear on both victims' faces and the mugger has not yet noticed anyone else—

Tsuna, for all his compassion and bleeding heart, was not a wise person. Moreover, Fuuta even ranked him as number one amongst those who can't refuse requests and ignore people in need. 

If this was back at home, he would have exercised more caution lest he wanted to attract unwanted attention; but since this was a superhuman society, he figured it wouldn't hurt to use and reveal his Flames. 

(He wrapped the scarf around his head to cover his hair and cast a shadow over his eyes just in case, though.)

"I'm probably going to regret this."

Tsuna then took a deep breath to steel himself for the reckless stunt he was about to pull off.

With one swift kick, Tsuna swept the man's legs and the mugger fell. In fact, he didn't even need to use his Flames. They were fortunate that when the man accidentally pulled the trigger, nobody got shot (although it did elicit horrified screams from both the victims and the witnesses). Somehow, the mugger must've hit his head on the ground, because he was already unconscious the moment Tsuna looked over him when he didn't move. 

Well, that was anticlimactic.

Everyone remained gaping at him. Although, who could blame them? It's not every day that you'd see a short boy come out of nowhere and knock a mugger off his feet.

The woman wouldn't stop bowing and thanking him. Tsuna blushed at her praise and rubbed the back of his head sheepishly. He didn't expect it to go so smoothly, but all's well that ends well, he supposed.

"Thanks, mister!" The little girl had stars in her eyes as she looked at him. "Are you a hero?"

Tsuna gave her an awkward smile— not that she could see with the mask covering it up. "Um, not really. I was just... you know, passing by."

"Really?" She furrowed her eyebrows, clearly not believing him. "You look like one."

The brunet looked down at his outfit. He didn't see anything peculiar about it — it was nothing but a plain hoodie and pants — not an attire that screams 'HERO!'. When he voiced his confusion, the girl pointed at the scarf wrapped around his head and the surgical mask on his face. 

"You're hiding your face and you have that scarf. Only heroes would have secret identities and wear those clothes."

He points at the scarf. "It's just an old ugly scarf."

"It is," The girl nods at him. Tsuna was a bit offended on how quick she was to agree with him. I mean, it was unsightly, yet he's wearing it anyway. "But if it's your hero costume, then it doesn't have to be pretty." Point taken. The brunet would have said more if arguing with a child wasn't fruitless.

The mother finally stopped bowing. "I don't know how I can ever repay you, young man."

"No, it's fine. I didn't do this for a reward. You don't need a reason to help others!" He spluttered. "Anyways, I'm going to uh, go home or something," Tsuna mumbled. It was still a good hour before midnight, but he inferred that it's about time to go on his way and get an extra hour of sleep in the park until morning patrol the next day. Besides, once the police come, they'd reprimand him for his stunt and he was too exhausted to deal with that.

When he was walking away, the mother called out to him. "By the way, what's your name? We'd at least like to know the brave young man who saved us!"

He waved his hand in dismissal. "Don't worry about it."

[didyoutakemygingerale]

Let's Talk About Martin Stein!

I've noticed recently in the Legends of Tomorrow fandom that a lot of people are getting very upset with this character. Particularly in reference to how he is treating a certain criminal with a rat. I am not trying to justify Stein's actions anymore than I would try to justify Snart stealing things or pulling a gun on Sara. I have however realized that there is a radical difference in how Stein is perceived as compared to how Mick and Snart are perceived. I think part of this has to do with the fact that Stein's arrogance is seen entirely as the result of him being an old straight white man. I feel like there's a bias on tumblr that negatively reflects on characters that are old straight white men and I understand that they are commonly the most privileged group, but TV shows are rarely simply and a good narrative has layers to it. Stein was a victim of at least emotional and verbal abuse as a child and this has been getting over looked for far too long. Symptoms Of Child Abuse In Adults: - Emotional difficulties such as anger, anxiety, sadness, or low self-esteem We've seen Stein's temper regularly directed at others and himself. - mental health problems such as depression, eating disorders, post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD), self harm, suicidal thoughts While an argument could be made for Stein having PTSD, I wouldn't suggest abuse as the direct, or only, cause. - problems with drugs or alcohol We quite regularly see Stein turn to alcohol when he is upset about something. Jax even remarks on his at one point by asking if Stein is drinking whiskey. - disturbing thoughts, emotions, and memories that cause distress or confusion I have seen no evidence for this one as of yet. - poor physical health such as obesity, aches and pains Anyone who has watched the show knows that Stein is a workaholic how can and has missed meals for it. - struggling with parenting or relationships He directly says he was always worried about becoming a father because of his father. - worrying that their abuser is still a threat Again, I have no evidence of this one. - learning difficulties, lower educational attainment, difficulties in communicating He doesn't have known learning difficulties and definitely did not have lower educational attainment, but he does have a lot of communication difficulties. - behavioural problems including anti-social behaviour, criminal behaviour I think a strong argument could be made for Stein being anti-social. He refuses to follow the universities protocol when he is first mentioned as the team leader for FIRESTORM in Flash 1x10. That's the basics, but it goes a lot deeper than that. I mostly noticed the abuse symptoms when comparing his character to Snart and Mick. Mick is known to have an abusive father. Lines such as: "You sound just like my dad," (LOT 1x12) make that clear. Snart is also known to have an abusive father. I'm not even going to explain that one with a quote. What is under played in my opinion is that it seems that the only other crew member in a similar situation is Martin Stein. A fact that goes under represented because it's not as obvious a form of abuse. Stein mentions in LOT 1x11 that his father was a 'degenerate gambler' and often got his son to sit in on card games (my guess is to help him cheat) and in season 2 (not sure of the episode) Stein says that he was always afraid to have children because he didn't want them to have a father like he did. That all may not seem that bad, but if you read between the lines it speaks volumes. Stein's abuse wasn't physical it was verbal and emotional. I wouldn't be surprised if his father took every opportunity to tell him that he was stupid, weak, and useless. The arrogance and refusal to believe that someone else's brain was needed to save the day is likely a direct result. Stein, Snart, and Mick are really the three best examples of adults who where abused as children I have seen in a long time. They each tackle a different outcome of that situation. Snart falls into learned habits and the footsteps of the person he hates so much. I would think that even though his father is dead he's still terrified of the man. Good examples of this can be seen in Flash 2x03, specifically when Lewis tries to touch Snart and he backs away. Mick struggles with an addiction. For pyromaniacs, fire is easily comparable to a drug. The synapses that fire in their brains when they see a flame are identical to those of a drug addict when they come into position of their chosen substance. Mick is very much in that situation and eventually it may kill him. Stein has been rebelling against his father since he could. He's put all his effort into proving that he didn't have to be like him that he could be better. He always expects himself to improve and pushes himself too hard. Regardless though the words would still haunt him. He has a doctorate, but Mick's brain was more useful therefore he is dumb. We have seen Stein berate himself for his arrogance before in LOT 1x02 when he saw that his arrogant ways hadn't changed from young adulthood. I would like to suggest that the sort of arrogance on display there and continuing throughout the series is a left over defence from a childhood of being told he was stupid, weak, and useless. You cannot excuse the actions of people who were physically abused and blame someone who was verbally abused for theirs. This is such a damaging double standard and the abuse that Stein suffered deserves to be recognized. Does this excuse his actions? Absolutely not. But, Stein is a victim of abuse who rarely is acknowledged as such. He probably has a lot more in common with Mick and Snat than he or they are willing to admit. The three of them have all made mistakes and they all have said/done some terrible things, but to ignore one character's abuse in favour of outlining another characters seems wrong to me. It's not often that we see TV Show's portray verbal and emotional abuse, so please keep this in mind when considering scenes between Stein and other characters.

[etnanotvshows]

❤ Veronica Mars ❤ Big Binge(Re)watching on one of my favourite series. ❤ It's summer, in this moment of the year usually the empty tv schedules lets me some holes in my (limited) free time and so i decided to do something that was rolling in my mind for quite a while now: rewatching veronica mars conpletely. This serie is one of my favest ever and i rewatched it a lot of times through the years but since the movie came out i never rewatched the whole thing all together. When i went to watch the movie at its release date it had been quite a while since i last saw veronica mars and so i'm sure i missed a couple of references here and there. Now i wanted to catch 'em all. XD With that said, after a few weeks spent on rewatching this pearl of a serie i have a couple of thoughts and question marks i have to note down. As a refresh of memory season three left us with many questions: - Veronica was with Piz at the end of the serie but when Logan beat up the ass of the scumbag that released her "sex tape" out in the open she smiled at him like a thanks (or something that could be seen as more for the LoVe fans) so we do not get to clearly see who she ends up with. - The Sheriff election: with Don Lamb now dead Keith was temporarily filling the place but only an election could make him permanent. However at the last minute his investigator and rival Vinny Van Lowe joined the "race" and emerged as his counter part in the fight for the job of the sheriff of Neptune. Since Vinny has been cooperating with the criminal family Fitzpatrick during all season 3, and was also plenty supported by them during elections, it was going to be a hard fight for Keith to win; however we do not get to see who the winner is, we are only left at the final scene of the last episode with Veronica voting for her dad. - Veronica's "stage" for the FBI is plenty mentioned during the serie, although when she misunderstands her Criminology Professor's intentions she makes a stepback in the will to join this stage but after that, when all is cleared, she still shows greatly interest for this opportunity. We are left with her happy about the acception from the FBI for her internship in virginia and Piz's face not exactly excited. - Wallace was joining the summer program of the group helping the child-soldiers in Uganda in the 18th episode of s3. - Mac left animalist Bronson (whyyyyyy?????) for helper-cheating-in-exams Max but in her last scenes wasn't too happy of Max's total lack of interest in college since his extra curricular activity was more than good for his wallet. And that's about it.. Probably some other minor stuff but that's what strikes out my attention the most. So here we go, beware for anyone that didnt see the movie yet from here on there are SPOILERS. Now we go to the 2014 movie of Veronica Mars. Set around 10 years after s3: - Veronica's lovestories have a hole from "9 years ago" to "1 year ago". The movie starts off having her together with Piz but it's been mentioned by Piz that they have not been together for these past 10 years. Veronica and Piz are back together only since 1 year and he mentions they had a relationship in college (that we know in fact) 9 years ago, but that's it. Logan also is surprised to find out that she is currently with Piz, but anyways they didn't stay in contact with eachother for these past years. - The current sheriff of Neptune turns out to be another Lamb, Don's brother, however more corrupted and less "capable" than the Lamb we know of. (wtf a brand new brother pulled out of a magic hat) A question mark remains: who won, years before, the election? Keith or Vincent? Nothing has been clearly stated about this in the movie; however when Veronica refreshes the viewers' memory with a brief description of the characters, at the moment to introduce Vinny she just says "private eye" and nothing else. She could have added "former sheriff" or any of her classic subtle comments to let us know his incapability to do the Sheriff but she did not. This leads me to think that Vinny didn't win the election. Just speculatively speaking, Keith could have won and stayed in her Sheriff job for the 5 (? Correct me here, im just guessing) years as the rules/laws say, so i can suppose that Neptune got worser after Keith's sheriff career finished. Right now he's returned to his private eye job with newer and technologic spy stuff. He is still mentioned as "former Sherif" by random characters but it's not specified the period of time they refer to (if when the Lilly Kane's murder occurred or if it was years later post elections). - The famous FBI internship.. Was blandly forgotten in the movie. Back then, after s3 finished, the staff produced a teaser trailer known as 4×00 where Veronica was FBI (letting us assume that the internship went well and that, possibly, after college she became an FBI agent, giving a pretty decent idea of what season 4 would have been about. Sadly as we all know, that never happened due to low ratings), but as of now, in the current storyline of the movie that important opportunity, that was also overly stressed in s3, was like never happened. What's more is that when we get to see our sweet former cop-agent Leo D'Amato he asks Veronica about the famous FBI thing but she says something like "you have heard wrong" or something. It's officially never happened. Moreover, according to Veronica's inner monologues she has left her investigative career (which we could guess it includes the possibility of the FBI internship) because -and here a brand new line of stortytelling starts- it was too addictive to her like drougs are with toxic-addicteds or like alchool is for alcholists. I have to say: this complete "take over" of the serie's main soul transformed into "something bad" it disappointed me. Now we get to see an apparently changed Veronica who has totallt left the private eye career and is now facing the chance of a Lawyer career. Wow. That is some change. Isnt it? Im not disappointed in the idea of change of interests for our protagonist, im disappointed instead in the "change of personality" the movie gave her and in the "exorcising" process of her private eye experience which was like her whole world. Her being. On a side note we get to see someone else changed: Logan is in the military now, aviation if i must guess. - Wallace's experience in Uganda: never spoken of. Well not that we can demand that 10 years later they are still talking of what they did so much time before, but even a super small slight mention wouldn't have hurt anyone. Well, let's talk abou Wallace a bit more: he was an extremely talented athlete and his dream was to become an engeneer. He wasn't super smart at was having some difficulties in his engeneer class but he was trying hard and it seemed he was achieving enough results to pass the class but who knows what happened. In this department as well nothing has been said anymore. For what regards his athlete talents it looks instead that he didnt pursue a professional athlete career but remained in the "same field" acting as a coach now, completely different from what fans might have expected. - Mac. She is always been a nice character, now we see her adult version working for Kane industries, a short cut of hair and woth no mentionable-worthing love stories currently. She is alone, i was sorry to see her with no one (well Wallace also is still single), of course no comments about her previous boyfriend/s be it Bronson or Max here either. Now to a new point to discuss that arised: - Weevil. Personally i always loved his character, probably almost as much as i love Logan. Thankfully they didnt make his character going out of the stage with the arrival of Herst college in s3, and since his arrest at the end of s2, made a sensed storyline that he strived to find a job that hired former inmates therefor he was hired as the janitor in Herst college to wisely keep him in the cast. Back in s3 he was interviewed in criminology class and confessed that it was hard for him not to go back to his old bad habits but that he was also trying hard to pursue the right path. Now in the movie he is surprisingly changed a lot: he is married with a beautiful wife which he visibly loves, in addition he has a lovely daughter whom he adores. He has a proper job now, he has his own car workshop. He dresses with normal clothes and is 100% legit. Doesn't touch a bike since 5 or so years (which is when his daughter was born). I loved how he changed. However he can still be a badass if needed (see when he joins Logan in the fight to protect Veronica's honor at the high school reunion) and also brave and selfless (see when he helps that car assaulted by the new generation of PCH bikers band). However that is exactly where i want to go: the scene where he helps the "poor person" in the car (which we later find out was the damn Celeste Kane). In her panic the stupid rich woman shoots at Weevil who was just going to help her and not only she hurts him but she also doesn't say anything when the Sheriff fabricates evidence and place a gun in Weevil's hand. The thing goes on and he's at the hospital and has to face assault accusation and the Kane bitch still doesnt say anything. Now. I don't know if it was just the damn Sheriff's fault (but i don't think she would get easily intimidated by him, since she is way more powerful than him) or if it was her idea to blame Weevil just to avoid any news of her shooting at her helper, but still what the hell man. What the hell. Concerning Weevil's case, later we see Keith in car with agent Sax that was willing to testify about the illegal behaviour of the sheriff and his men but he get murdered with a planned car incident. So we have no evidence to help Weevil's case. Keeping on with this his storyline we jump ahead to the end of the movie: we see him at Keith's office and they say he is still not out of the woods. Damn! The video esposing Sheriff's illegal behaviour of willing to pursue Logan as murderer just because he didn't care, didn't proof his illegal corrupted behaviour as well regarding the arrest of innocent people falsily accused like Weevil. So that video didn't proof Weevil's innocence and his charges are still on. I was hoping for the movie to solve that part of the story too but they just did not. They left it there. C'mon! This thing pissed me off. Poor Weevil, he deserves more love! He has a family now, he cant face false charges.