#i been discussing with my sister kdramas and how it would be great if they adapted JA novels

[lily-s-world]

RIP Jane Austen, you would have loved korean dramas.

[whattodowithace]

Title: The Babysitter

Pairing: Byeongkwan x Reader

Writer: Whattodowithkpop [Lio]

Genre: Fluff; Slight Angst

Word Count: 2205

Summary: Byeongkwan took a job as a babysitter, but this wasn’t what he was expecting to happen.

A/N: This is based off the Kdrama ‘My Little Baby’. It’s not exactly dad!ace but I hope you enjoy it none the less.

*****

"Bold of you to assume I'm cut out for this." Byeongkwan glares at Jun, holding an ad in his hand seeking help for a babysitter.

"You need the job, plus you're like a kid yourself, you'll do fine." Jun laughs at the deadpan expression on Byeongkwan's face.

Jun was right. Byeongkwan needed the job, and Jun happened to know someone who was in search of a babysitter. Byeongkwan had never babysat anything in his life, but when you’re pinched for cash you’ll take anything.

“Fine.” Byeongkwan agrees, smoothing out the paper in his hands to read the details.

Byeongkwan dialed the number nervously, doubts upon doubts entering his mind. The phone rang a few times, Byeongkwan letting out a breath he didn't realize he was holding in, thinking he'd luck out without having to actually respond.

Unfortunately for him, she picked up on the last ring, a soft, feminine voice saying hello over the line. Byeongkwan's throat dried suddenly, nerves surging through him.

Jun nods his head at the younger, his eyes wide as he told him to speak through gestures.

The phone's voice asks if anyone was there.

"Yes!" Byeongkwan blurts out, wincing at his own voice. "Sorry, I was just calling about the babysitting ad."

"Oh yes!" She exclaims through the phone. "That's great. Can we set up an interview?"

Byeongkwan took a moment to respond, shocked at her forwardness. "Sure.. Yea, that's fine." He stutters.

The woman introduces herself, asking for his name.

"My name is Byeongkwan." He smiles, feeling more comfortable the more he talks with her, realizing she truly was as nice as Jun said she was. "I'm a friend of Park Junhee."

"Little Park Junhee?" She squeals in excitement, making Byeongkwan laugh.

"He's not so little." Byeongkwan smirks at Jun who looks at him with a shocked expression.

She laughs, bringing Byeongkwan back to her. "That's great! I'll text you after I get off work and we can work out an interview time."

"Okay, that sounds good." Byeongkwan agrees, the pair saying their goodbyes before hanging up.

"That sounded good!" Jun cheers as the two boys continue walking to meet up with the rest of the group.

"I hope the interview goes well." Byeongkwan nods.

Jun gives him a look, an eyebrow raised. "You were so hesitant just a minute ago."

Byeongkwan rolls his eyes. "Mothers are usually very strict and terrifying when it comes to their kids, of course I was nervous. But she sounds nice!"

Jun nods, his thoughts running wild as they approached their destination.

~

Byeongkwan received a text from his new possible employer. A time for an interview that he was currently waiting at as his hands rubbed together nervously.

He hadn't met the mom or the child he'd be babysitting, which only made his nerves worse as he knocked on the apartment door. He hears a faint 'I'm coming' before loud footsteps approach the door. The door swings to reveal a young woman, a woman much younger than Byeongkwan was prepared for.

"You must be Byeongkwan." She smiles warmly as she invites him in.

Byeongkwan's nerves skyrocket as he walks into the apartment.

"It's nice to meet you." Byeongkwan bows. "In.. In person, I mean."

She giggles at his nervousness, offering him a drink and inviting him to sit down. He does watching her as she prepared some water for the both of them.

"I have to confess." She starts as she sits next to him, handing him a glass. "I called Junhee's sister to ask about you. She and Junhee both had only good things to say about you."

"Oh." Byeongkwan nods, sipping his water lightly.

"They said you're really good with kids." She says. "Haneul is really a good kid, I wouldn't ask someone to watch him if he wasn't."

"I'm glad to hear that." Byeongkwan smiles. "Can I meet him?"

"He's not home right now." She tells him. "He's with his dad this weekend."

Byeongkwan nodded.

"How about we talk about the job some more?" She asks, Byeongkwan agreeing.

The two discuss terms and requirements for some time. Byeongkwan was surprised how forward she was, telling him she wanted someone that would stay a long time so that Haneul wouldn't have to get used to different sitters. She was generous about it and kind with all of Byeongkwan's concerns. With each question asked and answered, the likelihood of him getting hired skyrocketed. And by the end of the interview, that's exactly what happened.

"Byeongkwan." She catches his attention just before he leaves. "Thank you so much, I really appreciate it."

Byeongkwan smiles, some small amounts of excitement bubbling through him. "Of course."

~

It really didn't take long for Byeongkwan and Haneul to get close. Haneul was as good as his mom said he was, hardly ever giving Byeongkwan trouble. The two of them would play around a lot. Byeongkwan worried Hanuel's mom would get upset the first time she came home and they were messing around with nerf guns. However, she just laughed and made the two dinner. Overall, the dynamics of all relationships were good. Byeongkwan and Haneul got along and played until she got home, she often made them both dinner and Byeongkwan was able to have good conversations with her. Everything had been pleasant and happy! Until the day the papers came.

Haneul's parents were still married up to this point, but the day she received the divorce papers was a glum day. Byeongkwan didn't know much about Haneul's dad, but he knew every time she talked to him she would grow sad and distant. Byoengkwan knew he probably shouldn't have felt a twinge of anger, but he did every time he heard about Haneul's dad.

He hated seeing her and Haneul sad. He hated that the father made them sad. It wasn't until the papers came that he realized how much he started to care for the two of them. As he watched her wipe away the stray tears that fell from her eyes his heart twisted in hurt and anger. Byeongkwan was angry that her ex husband had made her cry. He did his best to distract Haneul from seeing his mom upset, continuing the game of battleship they had started. He was playing the game, but his mind wasn't fully focused on it. He watched as she made dinner, her shoulders slumped as she continually ran her fingers through her hair. Byeongkwan had the sudden urge to comfort her and tell her it was going to be okay. But he was just the babysitter, there was nothing he could do except try to keep Haneul occupied and happy.

She made a quick dinner, not feeling up to making the long meal she usually did. She ate quietly, only speaking when she wanted to keep Haneul conversing about his day. She smiled at him, but Byeongkwan saw the sadness behind it.

They ate quickly before she asked Haneul to go play with the kids across the hall. Haneul nodded as he went, it was often that he went to play with them after dinner, so it was nothing out of the ordinary. She waited before Haneul closed the door before she sighed heavily.

"You don't have to say anything." Byeongkwan breaks the silence, watching some small tears fall over her cheeks.

"Sorry you had to see me cry." She laughs quietly, hoping to lighten the situation.

"It's okay." Byeongkwan tentatively reaches a hand out to her hand, holding it gently. "It's stressful, don't feel bad for crying."

She was able to keep from sobbing, but she was exhausted and Byeongkwan could tell.

"I wanted to ask if you could watch Haneul on Saturday." She starts, looking into his eyes. His heart breaking as he saw them filled with tears. "That's the court date."

"Of course I can watch him." Byoengkwan nods, smiling widely in the hopes it would make her feel better.

"You've been a life saver, Byeongkwan." She looks down laughing again to keep from crying.

Byeongkwan's heart picks up speed at her words as she wipes the tears away.

"Haneul adores you." She looks up with a tearful smile.

"I adore him too." Byeongkwan admits, his mouth wanting to say he adored her as well, but knew it wasn't the time for that.

She smiles a genuine smile. "I'm glad."

~

That had been weeks ago. It wasn't the last time Byeongkwan witnessed her tears and with each one that fell, his heart fell harder for her. His anger grew hotter against the man that used to be her husband when he stated he wanted nothing to do with Haneul. Haneul was saddened, but he was okay. Unbeknownst to Byeongkwan, Haneul liked Byeongkwan more and was more worried of him leaving him than his dad.

Byeongkwan wasn't going to leave, though. He wanted to protect them both. He grew to love them, but he was worried it would only complicate things. Not only was he younger than her, but he was the babysitter.

He had vented to Jun about it hundreds of times, Byeongkwan frustrated about the whole thing. Jun always told him the same thing.

"If you don't make a move you'll regret it forever."

"But when is the right time?"

Byeongkwan still didn't know the answer to that question. He had hoped the right moment would present itself, but it never did. He feared he would never make his move because he was too cowardice.

~

It was a late evening, one like countless others they had spent together. The three were eating dinner, Haneul telling his mom about his day as usual. It was no secret where Haneul had gotten his boldness from, his mom had exhibited it on countless occasions. But neither one of them were prepared for the bold statement that came from his mouth.

"I had fun today, Dad." His eyes trained on Byeongkwan.

Byeongkwan's eyes widened as Haneul's stared into them.

"Hanel l, I'm... not your... dad." Byeongkwan stated carefully, hoping not to hurt his feelings in any way.

"I know." Haneul nods, a wide smile on his face. "But, you treat me like the other dads treat their kids."

Byeongkwan looks up to her, his face held a shocked expression as his gaze fluttered between the two.

She stared at Byeongkwan, a thousand feelings rushing over her. She had never payed much attention to how Byeongkwan had treated Haneul, she just knew they got along. But after Haneul's statement, she begin to look back, recognizing the signs. Her mind ran a mile a minute as it processed Haneul's words and Byeongkwans actions up to this point. Now when she looked at Byeongkwan, her heart picked up, joy flooding to it as she realized how wonderful he had been not only to Haneul, but to her also.

"Haneul honey, do you want to play with the kids across the hall?" She asks him, her eyes only leaving Byeongkwan for a second.

Haneul sighs as he gets off his chair. "I know why you send me there after dinner." He trudges to the door, his final statement causing Byeongkwan to choke on air and for her to gasp. "I know what moms and dads do together."

Haneul closes the door, leaving the two in an awkward silence.

It's a few moments before she breaks it. "I don't know where that came from."

"It's fine." Byeongkwan waves his hands in front of him frantically.

Byeongkwan's eyes drop to his lap where he twiddles his thumbs. She watches him quietly, trying to find her next words.

"You treat Haneul like your own son." She states, Byeongkwan lifting his head to look into her eyes.

"He's a really good kid." Byeongkwan admits with a small smile. "I hope I have a son like him one day."

"And you treat me..." She continues, Byeongkwan tensing as he waits for her next words with baited breath. "You treat me like a loving husband would treat his wife."

Byeongkwan gulps nervously, his eyes darting back to his hands.

"Why didn't I notice sooner?" She asks herself, a smile breaking out on her face.

She stands to approach Byeongkwan, grabbing his face gently to make him look at her.

"Why didn't I notice sooner?" She whispers as she looks down at Byeongkwan.

"You... I just..." Byeongkwan stumbles over his words, his voice shaky as he feels the warmth of her hands cover his cheeks.

"I want to protect you. Both of you."

She smiles at him, bringing his lips to hers in a soft kiss, first of many to come for the couple.

~

The woman from across the hall welcomes the young boy into her home, her own sons coming out to play with him.

"My mom and dad are at it again." He states dramatically.

"Mom and dad?" The mother asks with confusion, knowing about her neighbors recent divorce.

"Yea, they're doing what mom and dads do." He sighs, again, dramatically.

"What do moms and dads do?" She asks him, her confusion only growing.

He leans on his tip toes, beckoning her down with his hand.

"They kiss." He whispers in her ear, going off to play with his friends.

[p---leia]

Ancient Writer of dreams and nightmares: I am 71 (-one month), and have been writing (making up tales) since I was three. I can still remember my Pawpaw whittling a pencil for me, and Mawmaw tearing a piece of brown grocery bag for me to write on. They weren't 'poor', but writing paper wasn't to be wasted on a 'kid' just for fun. I carefully scripted my first short story.

Of course my 'letters' looked more like ancient Hanguel, so I had to read it to my "captured" audience. I really don't remember the story, but as my grandparents had a yard full of chickens and my dog, Mutt, liked to chase them (because of this we 'both' got into trouble -- because I always joined the chase) I most probably wrote about that.

My Pawpaw was a story-teller. For several years I thought there really was a baby found in the wilds of the African jungle and raised by the great apes. I thought he was the luckiest babe, EVER!

Then I found Pawpaw's books about three years after he died. I was eleven when he died, and felt that my best friend had abandoned me. But when I found those books I realized just where Tarzan actually came from and went to. I read everyone of those books and got the complete picture. THEN..

Well, Pawpaw also told stories of Daniel Boone and Davey Crocket...before I saw them on Disney. Then, of course, I went to school and learned what I already knew. Pawpaw was an excellent story-teller and never mixed up his facts, time-lines, or characters.

Growing up under his influence had a lot to do with how I developed as a story-teller. At family gatherings when I meet cousins I haven't seen in decades, they STILL remember me and the stories that I used to tell them. My children and grandchildren have grown up with me re-telling Pawpaw's old stories, and sharing many that I made up on the spot.

But I think what I read in my early years developed my writing style.

I was just turned eight when I read my first Shakespeare, MIDSUMMER NIGHT'S DREAM. He was my first favorite author. Then I was forced to read Romeo and Juliet. I was disgusted by the fact that TRAGEDY was made famous as a ROMANCE! Even at the innocent (then) age of fourteen, I was disgusted with the idea that it was considered romantic for 'anyone', let alone 'teenagers' to commit suicide over unrequited love.

My sister (now 68) and I recently discussed this play. Because she had a 'forbidden' teenage love, she said that she related to the story (even though she had never read it). GASP! It was required reading in ninth grade!

I remember our dad breaking up my sister and her boyfriend, who was really cool. He was a hard working farm boy who had saved his money to buy a motorcycle. AND his own car. But he wasn't good enough for my sister. smh

I always thought her story would make a great LifeTime movie. But I'm not touching it. She would 'skin me' for sharing with the world her broken heart. And if I added the stuff that sells today, she'd scalp me for lying. Not a win situation at all. So, I will write notes in my "Random Jottings Journal" for future decendants who might grow into writers or story-tellers.

By the way, the title "RANDOM JOTTINGS" came from a sci-fi book that I read as a kid in the fifties. I don't remember the author, although I'm pretty sure it 'might' be from a Heinlein juvenile book. But I've never found a reference to any sci-fi books using that term. SO!!! If anyone recognizes "RANDOM JOTTINGS", which was a note book that a professor/scientist/genius used to keep his 'thoughts', PLEASE share the author's name and the title of the book!!! Thank You.

In the meantime, I referenced Shakespeare. James Oliver Curwood wrote about Kazan, the Wolf Dog, and later Baree, Son of Kazan. From those two books, read when I was eleven, I searched for and found other books about Canada. Later there was Walter Farley, author of the Black Stallion, and the Island Stallion series. I think I met my FIRST friendly alien in the Island Stallion Races.

Of course, Edgar Rice Burroughs taught me much false history about the jungles of Africa, as well as the Moon and Mars. But I loved every 'read-under-the-covers-with a-flashlight' minute! I believe he was a contemporary of Zane Grey, because he wrote a few non-jungle and non-space stories, too. Which led me to Zane Grey.

Having read both of their biographies at a young age, I learned about the hardships of being a writer. I should say 'the hardships of a struggling writer'. I have never had a problem writing. Since I write for 'fun' and not 'profit', the few short stories I've had published were by local press, and a State magazine.

No, my struggles have centered around graduating high school, and completing college, stuggling to satisfy my husband, a 'Mr. Spock in the Flesh' personality, and later raising two children without benefit of parental support or child support. But we survived in the middle of laughter and many tears. And my made up stories about children lost in the woods who were rescued by a great friendly bear, or wolf. Or dog. And sometimes by a great Black Panther - a by product of one of my Pawpaw's 'local historical tales'.

I understand that publishers detest stories that begin with "It was a dark and stormy night.." But let me tell you, some of the BEST bedtime stories occur on stormy nights when the power has gone out, and it's too hot for candles or lanterns. That shadow that stands darkest in the corner and seems to be moving towards the bed is actually grandma come to check on the kids, and stands quiet so not to disturb the kids if they're already asleep. But since they are awake, and they see her 'shadow', she becomes the old crone who lives in the castle dungeon, and has slipped her chains to visit with the 'wee folk'. But there are no fairies out on such a blustery night, so the old crone comes to visit with the 'wee bairn', who fall all over themselves to get out of bed and sit around her to hear her stories of 'long ago' and other 'dark and stormy nights'. Again -- unpublished, because publishers don't like ... LOL

Of course there's always On-Line publishing. But that involves more work than actual writing.

Back to the writrs who influenced my writing:

While I enjoy a good Western, an adventurous space trek, or time travel, I also enjoy the occasional Historical Romance. Georgette Heyer was my first! I still re-read her amazing books. Of course there's Jane Austen.

There are a myriad of modern writers that I have read over the last five decades. Heinlen, Asimov, Norton, Bradley, McCaffrey, Moon, Stirling, Krentz/Castle/Quick, and Moening, just to name a few of the ones whose books I have in my personal library.

Those older authors did affect my writing style to develope as I read their stories. The later authors helped me to move into the late 20th century. But I'm not so sure that I like the 21st century so much. It's all about being politically 'correct'. If you aren't ashamed of your gender, your race, your country, your religion, your culture, your family, your history, then you are prejudiced. That's just too much guilt to have to live with.

I'm still dealing with my mom's death from ten years ago. I was her care-giver for five years. Her doctor had given her nine months. I still worry if I did enough for her in those last years.

And though my children are grown with their own families, I worry that I wasn't a good enough parent. And I worthy as a grandmother? How was I as an older sister? I was responsible as a moral guide when our parents were at work. Was I a good neighbor? A good support in our Church? And Hollywood wants me to feel guilt about something I can't change?!!

I'm an old woman who still likes being a woman and enjoys liking men. I'm not just white. I'm also mixed with a bit of Native American, and even a drop of -- OMG!!! --- Black. snicker.

That's a serious joke, because as a kid I had a recuring nightmare that I was a black man being judged by a group of people in white hoods I was hanged amidst their fiery torches. I always thought those white hoods represented the Catholic Church, because at that young age I didn't know about the Ku Klux Klan. Even though I grew up in the South, my family was not involved with that group of out-lawrey. Thank God!

Still, I'm supposed to feel shame? For something not even my family supported.

I've always believed there's a hint of Fae in my DNA. Because I love dancing in the light of the full moon, and flying with the owls who perch outside my bedroom window and call to invite me to follow the moon's shadow. If I am part Fae, I know it came from my mother's people. They were Irish mixed with Alabama Indians who believed in the Nunnehi aka Immortal, and the Yunwi Tsunsdi, aka Little People.

ALSO, while there's no DNA proof of ancestry, I've always been a 'closet Chinese'.

In the Fifties, when WW2 was still fresh, and we were involved with the 'Korean Conflict', and at odds with China, I would sneak around the radio, turn down the volume, and tune into 'that wierd channel' that sometimes played Opera, or Chinese music. Ahhh. I would close my eyes and wander through the few visuals I'd found in books, or the occasional movie. (before color tv)

A year or two ago I was totally depressed and disgusted with American TV. Hollywood has become so political, so wierd. Their programming is no longer for entertainment, but to 'educate, enlighten, or to inform'. zzzzz

Then I found KDrama!!!!! Korean TV. Japanese Tv. squeal!!! Chinese TV.

The rom/coms are sweet and 'pure'. Okay. I'm realistic. This is not a reflection of real life on any planet. But the innocence of the early 1950s programs is there. Similar to Disney's 'Summer Magic'. I'm happy with those dramas that remind me of thati nnocence. I have found a few dramas that shared more than I cared for, and I do enjoy an occasional 'romp'. But I've always preferred the Lady and Gentleman characters.

And watching these programs have reminded me of those fairy tales and legends from my childhood that had been sprinkled with the Occasional Oriental myth, legend, and children's tale.

Then I remembered my FIRST historical legend. "The White Stag" by Kate Seredy, is the tale of Atilla the Hun!

I recently found a copy of that book and am waiting for a quiet time, when the power is out and there's nothing to do. Then I will use one of the many flashlights I bought for a huge hurricane, and relax on the sofa beneath an open window and read this legend once again. I live in Florida. The odds of this happening increases as the summer progresses. I can't wait to learn if my memory of this tale of Atilla the Hun remained true, or has been distorted in the last half of a century.

Most of the tales that I write involve space adventures, the occasioanl ghost, and encounters with fairies, the evil ones, not the romantic ideal fairy. smh

I've never been very good with romance or comedy. But thanks to the recent influence of the Asian productions, I have re-formatted one of my dark adventures and turned it into a rom/com.

I love a good joke, but very seldom get the point or see the humor. And I can NEVER remember the punch line if I try to share a joke. My family have said they will write on my tombstone --

"I don't remember the punchline ... but it was funny."

But as I write humorous lines or events I find myself laughing. Or crying at sad events. And I am all 'giggly' when I write what is supposed to be innocent romance between a young and shy couple. But I have never felt that my own reactions were a true guide to how the story might come across to a 'reader'.

As it happens, I have two sisters younger than I am. My middle sister is bored easily and immediately redirects our conversation to something about 'her'. Okay. I understand. She is lonely, needy, and maybe a bit selfish? Not judging. She's the 'middle child' and that's her excuse. ROFL..

But the youngest sister is my greatest fan who declares that I am an awesome writer. "I love you, sister, dear."

So she visited me last week and patiently listened as I read the first chapter. She listened quietly, and I wondered if I had 'read her to sleep'. sigh. Boring books are often the best sleeping pill. Then I heard her laugh.

Squeals/Dancing/hooting/flying around the room in ecstasy!!

Okay! At least one person has laughed. And she's not that easily 'tickled'.

So, I will always carry on and write. But now I feel that at least I might be following a path strewn with "Black-Eyed-Susans, honeybees, butterflies, and bunnies".

I don't know if anyone will read this, or will enjoy it. I hope so. While sharing bits of my youth, my worries, and my concern about certain ones of my 'stories', I actually had ideas for developing 'new' stories.

I am always amazed when writers say they are 'blocked'. I have only to open my eyes to see a world around me that no one else can envision. I listen to a song, and I'm in a different world, time, planet. A gift from Pawpaw, and Mother's DNA.

It is my oldest granddaughter's birthday this month, and I don't know what to give her for her birthday. But when she was younger, she always asked me to tell her a story. I think that I will pull out one of my OLD/ANCIENT tales that I wrote when her dad was her age and make it into a book for her.

p---leia aka Mamma KayeLee

7/19/2020

[betweenlifeandfiction]

Another me  (part 2)

Imagine you become someone else. That’s what happens to Kang Min Sun. After unclear circumstances she starts new life as Hana. That’s how she meets Kwon Jiyong and the rest of YG artists. At first it seems like a dream but nobody’s life perfect and soon Min Sun will learn this lesson.

Genre: melodrama/comedy/fantasty

It’s meant to be wrote in style of kdrama. Jiyong as a male lead and Seunghyun as a second lead. Reader as Min Sun/Hana- female lead.

Part 1

Kim Ha Na, more known as Hana. She debuted in 2014 as a solo artist after being the YG trainee. Her first album was sucessful and later she recorded two songs with T.O.P and G-Dragon. She also had few cameos in dramas. She’s said to have come back at the end of this year.

These were basic information about a person who was apparently you now. Or you was actually this person. In her body. Trying to figure it out was causing another panic attacks so you just decided to stay glued to computer and continue reading information about Kim Hana. You stucked in some apartment and before you left hospital, bodyguard had to deal with reporters in front of building. Until your leg was broken you had to act like you was really a person in whom body you lived. You had to act you remember things so you tried to find as much news about Hana as possible. You had to act that you’re not scared of a fact that you actually moved in time from 1998 to 2018.

Hana, you can search Internet on your phone. It’s uncomfortable to sit at the table woth plastered leg. You manager said and put this weird, flat thing on a desk. Your previous phone looked simpler but this one was colorful and had big screen without keyboard. It looked so complicated and it was locked by password that you didn’t remember.

Want me to help you to sit on bed? Manager asked you.

I.. I wanna eat ramen. you changed subject.

Ramen? You always eat greece salad at this hour.

You stopped yourself from making surprised face. Your manager came up to fridge. You would normally tell him to mind his business but you tightened your mouth to stop yourself from comments. This girl seemed polite and strict. Unlike you with your bad temper and laziness. You looked again at beautiful furnitures around you. This place looked expensive.

It’s a dream to live in so great apartment. you sighed to yourself.

That’s why it’s yours. This is one of your favourites, isn’t it? Man added and gave you your salad.

Do I have another apartments? you asked without thinking. He looked at you surprised behind his round glasses. Ah.. Right. Now I remember. Everything comes back to my mind.

You doubted it sounded reliably but it was better than nothing. Then your manager said he would leave your for a while to buy more products to your kitchen. It was so unusual to be treated this way. For the next week you literally studied from Internet about korean wave, idols and YG artists. Meantime you started private rehabilitation with doctor at your home. Even beautician came to take care of your skin and nails. You felt like a princess.

Ah.. What a beautiful life. you sighed and took another seafood from your plate. You was sitting on the folding chair in fluffy robe. Month have passed in the blink of an eye.

Hana, your mother calls you. your menager told you and he took your iphone from a table and handed it to you.

My mom? you said with enthusiasm before you realized he didn’t mean your real mom. It felt awkward at first but later you just acted like you really talked by phone with someone who was your mother. You planned to find out about her and leave this place after convalescence.

No. There’s really no need to fly from USA, mom. I’m getting better. you said at the end when Mrs.Kim suggested to visit you.

Anyway. I’ll visit you in nearer future. Call me more often.

Yes. Thanks. Bye, mom.

Few minutes later when you ened your conversation, your phone started to ring again. You saw a name on a lockscreen: Yang Hyun Suk.

Answer for me. you asked your menager.

Oh.. Ok. he mumbled. Yes, Mr. Yang? Here’s Park Dae Hyun. Yes. She’s better now. Doctor said she will be able to walk without struches soon. Meeting? Tomorrow? Yes, sir. I think we will handle it. Goodbye.

What meeting? you asked when Dae Hyun disconnected.

All artists have a meeting with CEO to sum up current projects and establish new things.

When next day your driver stopped a car in front of YG buildling, you couldn’t believe what you saw. Dozens of photoreporters and not less of fans gathered close to your car. Your manager told you to put sunglasses on and asked two bodyguards to go out first.

Hana! Hana! group of girls started to scream when you went on the sidewalk. You collides with your bodyguard’s back when he pushed away intrusive reporter. Now you knew you was said to hide behind sunglasses. Flashes of cameras were so blinding. Everybody around tried to come closer and take a photo or record you. Second bodyguard and your manager helped you to walk by crutches and enter entrance. When you finally came to elevator, you could say that you felt safe. Your manager opened a door to big conference room. All eyes turned to you.

Welcome back, Hana. Please, take a seat. you heard familiar voice. It was CEO Yang. You watched few videoclips with him during your stay at apartment. You actually got know about all of these people in room. Three man on the left were from Epik High. Then girls from Blackpink and boys from Winner. You still didn’t remember names of all of them.

Good morning. you said and you barely bowed.

Here’s free place. said a man with small eyes and prominent nose. It was Kang Daesung. Rest of members were sitting next to him on the right side. When you sat, you looked closely. You recognized that man behind dark glasses was T.O.P. You was curious if he was as handsome as on photos but you could only see his profile. The next one was a dark-haired man in weird clothes, G-Dragon. He had a face that even women could envy. Then it was maknae of Big Bang, Seungri. He looked at you and smiled at the same time with Taeyang who was next to him. You shyly bowed what was nothing like you but it was a first time when so many handsome men was looking at you at the same time. It felt so great to live like a celebrity and be a real beauty. Maybe I should live this dream a little bit longer? You thought.

Ok. If everybody’s present, let’s start. CEO annouced. He discussed with Winner about their tour and then he looked at you.

Hana-sshi, we’re glad that you’re fine. YG will take care about press but I would like you to give an interview after few months. Reporters are at the building so please, agree with Dae Hyun if you want to make a short statement. It’s the best moment when they know that you arrived here.

Yes. you answered shortly.

We will talk about that planned collaboration with GD when you fully recover. Mr. Yang continued. You stifled your moan, hearing this. So you was meant to start some project with GD? Shit..

We will talk it out when Hana will be in good shape. Meantime I will be re-writing a song. you heard Kwon Ji Yong.

That’s all right. CEO said and looked at you again. I hope it won’t take more than a month for you to be able to work again. I’m really rooting for this project but that schedule is not a problem for you.

I will work hard. You anwered just like these all idols from videos used to say. These informations helped you a lot to deal with this situation but after Mr Yang’s words you suddenly felt so helpless. Trainees worked hard for years to improve their singing and dancing skills. You had no preparation, you couldn’t sing or dance, you didn’t know how to talk with press and the most importantly you was different person with your own memories and experiences.

I’m fully responsible for someone’s sucess now. you whispered to yourself when you left a room.

What? your menager asked you.

Nothing. I need to go to bathroom. you suddenly said.

I can’t go to female..

I know. I’m able to pee on my own. Don’t worry. you interrupted him. He looked embarrased. You entered toilet and looked around. It was only you. You wanted to try again with phone call to your mom. You only wanted to hear her voice. The last time there was no answer. Maybe she changed her number? It’s been ten years. Your heart was beating so fast and then you heard someone’s voice.

Hello?

You froze. Female voice asked again. It sounded exactly like your sister’s. But she was living in Busan and you wasn’t that close.

H-Hello? you stuttered.

Who’s there?

You knew she couldn’t recognize you when your voice was different so you found a new solution.

Hello. Is it Mrs.Kang‘s phone?

Oh.. Yes. But she can’t talk. Your sister answered.

When can I call her then?

Who are you? She asked you after a while. She was always suspicious.

I’m.. Sun Min’s friend from high school. I lost her number and some of former friends wanted to meet up.

I’m sorry.. You probably didn’t know it. She said with tensed voice. My sister is dead for ten years.

Suddenly you wasn’t able to make any sound. You even couldn’t move. It felt like you was close to fainting.

I’m really sorry but I can’t help you. I thought that all of her friends knew. I’m at the hospital. Our mother had a stroke few months ago.

Then you could only hear her crying. And you was crying with her. On the other side of line. When you already disconnected and fell to the ground. Your sob mingled with a sound of falling crutches.

Mom.. I’m sorry. You sobbed loudly and touched your chest with pain. It felt like something was tearing apart inside of you. I’m dead, I’m dead..

What’s happening there? some low voice came out behind a door.

I’m dead.. I died. You kept repeating in silent voice. Tears were still falling. You saw long legs in black, laquered boots in front of you.

Hana? What happend?

You looked up. Choi Seunghyun was standing in the doorstep.

Where’s you menager? he kept asking. Some man behind him, moved closer and picked up your crutches. They both looked shocked and you slowly realized that you was sitting in the middle of the public toilet with probably blurred make-up and red eyes. This pain inside was so strong and you couldn’t do anything. And you didn’t want to move. Do anything.

Come on. Seunghyun said and grabbed your hands. You forced yourself to stand up.

Hana!

Your manager showed up. Tht other man gave you crutches and put sunglasses on your face.

That’s better when you’re leaving in front of many people. he suggested.

What’s going on? I only left to buy coffe. Your menager said.

Why did you leave her when you know she has problems with walking now? Seunghyun said with irritation. You looked into his eyes behind dark glasses. His eyes had so deep, dark shade and thick lashes.

Aish.. She always drinks coffe at this hour. I thought it won’t take that long. Your manager kept whining when four of you walked corridor.

Thank you. I’m thankful. You said to T.O.P and grabbed his hand. He shuddered with surprise.

Are you ok? You don’t seem good. Why did you cry? Men next to him- probably his manager asked.

It’s this accident.. you started and tears started falling down your cheeks again.

Aigoo.. She’s still stressed. Let’s go home, Hana. You can drink coffe in car. You manager said and took you by hand. Thank you for help. He said to T.O.P and his manager.

Hana, we’re family. You can count on us. T.O.P suddenly said. You nodded and went to elevator. It felt like this man was the one who understood what a real nervous breakdown meant. He seemed empathic. Maybe that’s why you grabbed his hand without thinking. It’s been a long time since someone sympathized with you.