#i bawled my eyes out at the last two eps

[l13]

The loud thumping wakes you up, and you blink tiredly as the sound persists. You look at your ceiling for a second before you realize someone is knocking at your door. You groan, bringing your duvet over your ear as you snuggle in again.

“Leave me alone,” you mumble against your pillow as the knocking becomes more forceful.

Suddenly there’s silence, and when you finally think that whoever is bothering you has left, the knocking starts again.

You groan, cursing under your breath as you stand up, grabbing your gun from your vanity. You walk to your front door, opening it angrily.

“What-” your outburst dies down at your lips when you lock eyes with the last person you’d expected to see standing outside your apartment, but one you’d longed for, for years.

Your first instinct is to panic, there’s no way you were conscious. The person standing at your door was supposed to be dead.

So you raise your gun up, hand trembling, “This isn’t real.” you choke out, and Vander raises his hands slowly, opening his mouth to speak but you cut him off, “You’re not real, you’re not here.” There are tears dripping down your cheeks, the gun threatening to fall from your hand with how much you were shaking “Y-you’re dead, this can’t-” you clutch at your chest, heaving, and Vander’s hands grab at your shoulders when your knees buckle,

“My love,” The gun slips from your shaky grip and falls to the floor the moment the words leave his mouth. His voice, god fuck, his voice. You’ve dreamed of it, you’re certain you’ve heard it, back when the grief first clawed at your heart, when the illusions spilled into reality to try to mend what was broken.

But this sounded too real, and you gasped when his hand cupped your cheek, thumb wiping the tears that wouldn’t stop falling. “Darling, my darling girl. It’s me,” the sweet but rough sound of his voice sent shivers down your back, and you wanted to drown in it, you wanted to hear it again and again and again until you couldn’t anymore. You blinked rapidly, tears blurring your vision as your eyes danced across his features, the five bright white dots across his forehead would have confused you, if you weren’t on the verge of a panic attack.

You didn’t realize you’d raised your hand to cover his, until you felt the warmth of his hand under your skin. “S-stop, this isn’t real, this isn’t real, this isn’t real,” you squeezed your eyes shut, whispering frantically in order to wake up from this sickly realistic dream, to end this before you woke up and missed his touch again. And yet you craved more, desperately running your hands down his sides, back up to his chest, his shoulders, his back.

God, he felt real, and he was so warm, not like the previous dreams you’ve had when he was always cold, just a silhouette of the man you loved. He even smelled like your Vander. A sob broke through you, and you threw your hands around his neck, crying against his chest. Even if this wasn’t real, you’d still take advantage of this opportunity to feel close to him one last time.

You tried not to cry harder when his arms immediately circled around your torso, hugging you tight to him as you both slipped down to the floor, “Shh sh, love it’s me. Please, look at me,”

“If I do then I’ll wake up and you’ll be gone.” you muttered against his chest, nuzzling closer to him, “Let me have this, just for a moment.”

“You have me, forever.” His rough gravelly voice vibrated against your chest as he spoke, his breath hitting your ear as he nuzzled against your hair, his hands running up and down your back, spreading warmth everywhere.

Too real, too real, too real.

“I miss you so much. I-I can’t-” you take a shuddering breath in, “I can’t live without you. I need you back, please. Please, I’ll do anything.”

“My love, my heart. You beautiful, stunning creature. Look at me, I beg you.”

You could feel him leaning away just so he could cup your jaw, lifting your head up softly, so so softly.

Please.

“Look at me.” he mutters, the softness of his request filled with desperation. You slowly open your eyes, blinking away your tears, gaze immediately locking with his.

Your lips part as you take him in. The color of his eyes was much greyer than you remembered. You raised your hand to follow each feature, each wrinkle of his. After a moment, You brought your other hand up, as well, cupping both his cheeks in your hands, feeling his stubble prickle at your palms. “Vander… This- this can’t be real.” you move to pull away but he cups both your hands, keeping you in place, leaning his forehead against yours, “It can, it is. I’m here honey. I’m here.”

You can’t help but stare at his lips, watching them move as he speaks, your mind trying to make sense of what you’re seeing, hearing, feeling.

Please.

You can’t let yourself get too hopeful because this isn’t possible, and he seems to get it too, so he starts explaining.

He tells you everything. How he was on the verge of death, how a man, Singed, found him, turned him into something vile, but the mutation kept him alive, even if he wasn’t entirely himself. He tells you about how all he felt was pain, but you and the kids were the only thing in his mind the whole time, trying to block away everything else. Tells you about Powder, Vi, and Isha, how they found him, brought him somewhere, a colony of some sort. A man, the Herald, helped him, and “..honest to God he kind of scares me, but it-it didn’t matter then, and it doesn’t matter now because I’m here. I’m here with you.”

Please.

You don’t realize you’ve lost track of time until you’re looking at yourself. You blink quickly, eyebrows furrowing, but then you realize you’re looking at yourself in the mirror. Vander is still holding you tightly, and the side of your face is pressed against his chest, listening to his heartbeat as he whispers sweet nothings against the crown of your head. You stay there, listening to his voice and his heart for what feels like forever.

He grabs your shoulders, pulling you away from him just enough for him to look at you in the eyes, “Are you okay?” he asks, but his voice is muffled, sounding too far away. You blink slowly up at him and he frowns sadly.

“I missed you so much. Even in death I missed you, but I wasn’t selfish enough to wish I could see you again because that would mean you’d-” he cuts himself off, the strands of his hair moving as he shakes his head, eyes clenched shut as if to rid himself of that painful thought. “I-I’m here. I’m real. Darling, I’m alive, and I need you to know this.”

His eyes are pained as he stares down at you, once again cupping your jaw, thumb caressing your cheekbone “Say something.”

“I love you.”

His face immediately crumbles, eyebrows squeezing together as his tears start falling, and he tucks his head against the place between your neck and shoulder, crying as he squeezes you impossible tighter, “I love you.” he chokes out, and you feel him pepper soft kisses over your skin, the brokenness of his voice bringing fresh tears to your eyes as well.

You don’t know how long you stay tangled together like this, just holding each other, but Vander leans back suddenly, looking at you with so much adoration that it makes you want to scream. “Hi,” he mumbles, petting your hair softly, his other hand drawing circles on your back.

You start pressing soft kisses all over his face, not being able to contain your affection, and he closes his eyes, laughing giddily, the deep sound traveling over your skin, spreading warmth everywhere. God, you’ve missed this, missed him. “Hi.” you mutter, pressing one last kiss at the corner of his mouth.

His puffy eyes glance down at your lips, “Can I-”

“Please.”

He kisses you.

2024 © l13 | Do not steal, copy, edit, translate or re-post any of my works.

[pshbites]

LOVE ON AiR: 16. YAP CENTRAL EP.136: did social media ruin relationships?

WARNiNGS » profanity, mentions of d wording, sexual jokes, crying, ynhoon teasing, yn never being safe

wc: 3.1k

episode desc - enjoy your stay today in yap central! as we’ve done the whole cycle, todays episode is a deeper one! we open up with a positive impact we’ve seen on each other. then we go right in with how our presence on social media has affected our relationships. following that up we keep the theme of the deeper episode and go over the influence social media has on us and how we view ourselves. we end the episode off by saying one thing we’ve noticed about one another as we’ve grown and how we think it affects the friendship. the episode ends off on a bittersweet note but we hope you enjoyed your stay today in yap central!

*the 6 of you are seated in your assigned seats. jungwon adjusts the soundboard and riki tests the mic out, then giving him a thumbs up. sunoo sets his mic up a little closer to pick up his audio and looks to the camera, setting his phone down*

sunoo: it’s been so long since we sat in here

giselle: i know like two weeks right?

yn: i think almost three *you say, adjusting your outfit as well as your seating position. riki scoots over so you have more room.*

jungwon: i mean it counts as like a summer break since we didn’t really take one.

kat: good point. you know guys do you guys remember those um fuck what were they called

riki: it would help if you gave a description

kat: shut up im thinking

*the rest of you stare at kat in silence until jungwon breaks the silence to laugh, the rest of you following suit*

jungwon: im sorry it’s just what could it be that has you thinking that long

giselle: she’s using everything in that little brain come on now!

*giselles comment makes the rest of you laugh even harder, kat laughing as well*

kat: i can’t even think of it nevermind

yn: it’s okay babe you’ll find it later.

riki: i have to say these costumes are amazing actually. might be my favorite theme

giselle: you know riki you’ve been hating a lot less recently.

jungwon: i was gonna say that too, he’s a bit nicer

riki: what can i say, finally holding my deal for the new year’s resolution

yn: watch now that we said this he’s gonna be doing some fucked up shit by the time the episode comes out

*a text box pops up on the screen saying “he in fact did do some fucked up shit during the editing process of the episode - jungwon” then disappears after a couple seconds.*

riki: you have no faith in me

yn: simply stating the facts

jungwon: you guys ready for me to sign in?

kat: go for it man *she nods at jungwon who smiles back. jungwon adjusts himself and looks to the camera*

jungwon: beep beep! you’ve arrived in yap central i am your host today, jungwon or aang. starting from my far left we have.

kat: toph

riki: zuko

yn: katara!

giselle: azula

sunoo: appa!! *he shows off his fuzzy appa bucket hat, earning a smile from all of you*

yn: sunoo i love you please don’t die

*sunoo looks at you in horror as the others burst out laughing*

jungwon: anyways.. *nervous laugh* the cycle is complete so today is a deep episode!

giselle: oh my god last time i literally bawled on my way home

kat: won you always pick the most brutal questions

sunoo: i cannot believe you asked us if the younger versions of ourselves would like the us now. like that is so ugh

riki: look at the way he’s smiling i think it’s something torturing again

*jungwon grins evilly at everyone making the rest of you groan in both discomfort and agony.*

jungwon: starting with my first question! what is a positive impact you have noticed on each of us. let’s start with sunoo. you guys don’t have to go one at a time just build it up.

sunoo: okay well.. lay it on me. *he looks to the rest of you, nervously, then shocked at who speaks up first*

riki: you laugh a lot more

*giselles eyes widened as riki spoke, the rest of you sharing the same reaction. everyone stayed quiet so riki could talk.*

riki: like when we were in highschool you always seemed to be bothered, or like you just never really were happy. and i think when we started doing this and you started tiktok you’ve been a lot happier

yn: i was honestly gonna say the same thing. you seem happier when we go out sunoo, like you want to be there.

sunoo: i feel a lot happier, honestly it sounds stupid but doing this with you guys does make me really happy.

kat: i agree. i mean i really wouldn’t trade it for anything.

giselle: awww look at us having our moment!

*both you and sunoo giggle at giselles comment, jungwon nodding to giselle, signaling she’s next*

kat: giselle, you don’t really care what people have to say about you anymore.

jungwon: ahhhh i was gonna say that

kat: like you seem so much more confident now than you did before.

giselle: when though? because i feel like i just started feeling like this overnight.

yn: if i were to pinpoint a time frame id say when you broke up with [BLEEP]

sunoo: no i COMPLETELY agree, like there’s a brightness to you now.

giselle: aw thank you guys *she pouted then smiled*

jungwon: guys please be nice to me.

riki: you’ve always been a natural born leader. i just think you’ve always been positive.

yn: i agree but there’s like a glow to him now

kat: oh my god are you pregnant?

*everyone looks at kat then bursts out laughing. some of you stop but jungwon and giselle can’t stop laughing.*

sunoo: oh my god it has something to do with who gave you that bracelet

jungwon: sunoo seriously *his cheeks turn pink, hand now covering the friendship bracelet*

giselle: oooo who made it for you?

jungwon: it was a mutual swap

yn: mutual swap.. or she gave you that wap?

*the others start laughing again, jungwon as well. riki daps you up*

riki: that was a bar

jungwon: i’m not admitting anything.. on camera.

everyone: OOOOOOOO

jungwon: next! go flame yn!!

yn: not fair, we weren’t even done with you

jungwon: don’t care, you’re not as closed off as you used to be

riki: oh my god yeah, when we were kids you were so shy

yn: really? i feel like im still in my little shell

kat: no i get what they mean. i mean even when i met you, you were really shy.

yn: thank you?

riki: i think jungwon means it in the way that you’re more open to meeting others now. like you enjoy being a people person

yn: ahhh, i see now. i guess the podcast really helped with that. like seeing people say how they enjoy my little bits and just things like that. it sounds conceited but it almost made me feel like people actually valued me? you know.

giselle: i get it, it doesn’t sound conceited babe

yn: okay i don’t like this much attention

giselle: this sounds weird to say but riki has gotten nicer atleast to us

kat: yeah i see

riki: die

sunoo: glad to know you haven’t changed..

jungwon: guess someone doesn’t wanna open up today

riki: oh would you look at that! it’s kats turn!!

yn: i think kats tells us a lot more now. like before you never really told us anything about yourself.

kat: i just have trust issues, it was nothing personal.

giselle: it’s true it took her so long to open up to me

riki: i honestly think the podcast brought out the best in us. surprisingly enough

jungwon: i see what you mean. maybe another way to put it is that we realized how much closer the camera brought us

giselle: or this friendship is just a ploy for jungwon to make more money off of us

*everyone laughs*

sunoo: we’re such coworkers

yn: heard it here first!! giselle hates her friends

giselle: can you stop with that *laughs*

yn: oh i’ll drag it through the mud

giselle: then i’ll drag yn[BLEEP] through the mud

*everyone laughs even harder now, you side eyeing giselle.*

sunoo: she kinda got you there

yn: let’s move on?

jungwon: speaking of relationships. *you glare jungwon down as he chuckles a little, looking at his phone once more.* how do you guys think social media affected your relationships and how do you think social media just influences how you view yourself. you can answer it in any order.

sunoo: i feel like having a presence on social media just makes having a relationship so much harder.

giselle: it kinda does, like people just expect for you to lay out your entire lives on social media.

jungwon: i think it depends on what kind of person you’re with, it’s almost like that person has to be up to your fans standards you know.

yn: i think there’s some people who can be normal about it but at the same time you have to be okay with everyone knowing everything about you.

kat: yeah but then it just shows that people online think that we don’t deserve privacy. it’s fucked up like they’re borderline stalking us you know?

*riki glanced at you as kat spoke, noticing how you stiffened at the word stalking*

riki: a lot of people aren’t okay online, it’s weird. like being so obsessed with someone to the point of finding out their personal information

giselle: if that ever happened to any of us i really don’t know what i would do.

jungwon: i think i honestly would try to sue you know. you have to be a certain level of fucked to do something like that.

yn: yeah, i agree it’s so weird.

kat: i kinda don’t wanna sound like a pick me

riki: just say it, you won’t sound like one.

kat: it’s so much harder being a girl with a social media presence.

sunoo: the fact that you had to hesitate to even say that says everything

jungwon: i really don’t get it either, like i’ve seen both women and men do the same things online and sometimes the guy is worse than the girl and yet it’s always the girl getting attacked and harassed.

giselle: i think it’s because people just view girls as easy targets almost. like a girl could do something completely normal and the internet would spin it to make her a villain

yn: it’s disgusting really, no one really ever really wants to side with a girl.

jungwon: do the comments still get you guys? i mean i know it was really bad in the beginning

kat: actually no i remember when it got bad. it got bad that episode where [BLEEP]

*jungwon and giselle glance at each other then start laughing*

giselle: remind me to edit that out.

yn: honestly no, the comments don’t bother as much anymore. after a while i realized that they’re just saying this because they have nothing else to talk about so i just stopped looking.

kat: i agree, it gets better when you just stop reading the comments all together.

riki: god please take periods away from women and give it all to me.

*you and kat give riki a look then burst out laughing, sunoo jungwon and giselle following that.*

sunoo: can’t stay serious for a second

riki: i would never joke about women in pain

*jungwon and kat keep laughing as riki goes on, unable to take him seriously*

yn: going back to the original question i just think it’s hard, like seeing people overstep a boundary or intrude on your life and just be okay with it

sunoo: and people just say oh well you asked for this um? no i didn’t actually i just wanted post skincare videos

*jungwon snorts, causing a chain reaction for everyone else to laugh*

kat: im glad we haven’t cried in this episode yet.

giselle: oh my god don’t jinx it he still has two more questions

jungwon: you might cry at this next one *kat sends a look to jungwon and he gives her an evil smile* my next question is what changes have we seen in one another as we’ve grown up together. it can be good or bad.

riki: jungwons lost it this is so similar to the first question

yn: i feel like he means overall

jungwon: thank you! atleast someon listens to me

yn: *you look around shocked and confused* oh my god.. did you guys hear that? was that a ghost?

*jungwon stares at you as everyone else laughs at your joke*

sunoo: so are we gonna go around in a circle?

jungwon: no how about.. the person sitting across from you. like riki sits across from giselle so they can say it about each other

kat: wait i wanna start

sunoo: this is too much pressure

kat: *she stares at sunoo and smiles warmly* sunoo i admire your love for us. like i don’t know you always support all of us no matter what and i feel like as we’ve grown closer you just have so much love to give

giselle: that’s so adorable

riki: sunoo i love your videos please don’t die

sunoo: STOP WITH THAT JOKE *he turns to look at kat* thank you kat i love you. i have to say sometimes i feel like you don’t tell us everything but it’s okay, just because we’re your friends doesn’t mean we have to know everything about you. i just want you to know that we’ll always listen no matter what.

*kat stares at sunoo as he smiles at her, then looks down when she feels tears welling up in her eyes. riki looks at giselle and jungwon panicked as they pass him the box of tissues.*

yn: aw babe *you frown looking at her as she lifts her head up to see tears streaming down her cheeks*

sunoo: wait i didn’t mean to make you cry

kat: it’s okay i jinxed myself

*everyone laughs slightly, still worried about her. sunoo moves his mic and gets up to hug kat. they stay like that for a few seconds until he lets go, patting her head. he says something but the mic can’t pick it up then walks back to his seat.*

kat: it’s not that i don’t want there was just a time where i felt like no one really care you know?

jungwon: you’re not obligated to tell us everything, but we care more than you think even if we have weird ways of showing it. *he glares at riki who only throws his hands up*

*the rest of you laugh at riki’s reaction and even kat lets out a chuckle after wiping her tears*

kat: to the viewers watching.. this never happened i am mysterious and batman doesn’t cry

giselle: nurse.. she’s out again

riki: okay giselle! lay it on me! *claps his hands together*

giselle: you use being mean as a cover up you actually care a lot about what people think but you use being rude or mean as a shield.

*sunoo gasps, the rest of you stare in silence because giselle is 100% right*

riki: okay cut the cameras

jungwon: i mean she’s not wrong

riki: if you wanted me to cry it’s not gonna happen

giselle: i know

riki: i hate you guys

sunoo: yeah sure you do

riki: well, since you want a taste of your own medicine *riki clears his throat* you shouldn’t get into another relationship, atleast until you evaluate how you act during them.

giselle: excuse me?

jungwon: weird ass time to admit your feelings

riki: you’re a weirdo that’s not how i meant it

yn: well then how did you mean it

kat: i’m curious

riki: every time i've seen you get into a relationship you just stop acting like yourself. you’re less confident and it’s almost as if you change yourself to please the guy you’re with. I just don’t like seeing any of my friends like that.

*all of you stare in silence at giselle, the air feeling heavy as she pushes her mic away and mumbles something to jungwon then ups and leaves.*

yn: um. is she okay?

jungwon: she needs a second

riki: was it something i said?

jungwon: it’ll be okay, she just said she needs a second.

sunoo: she’ll be okay guys, let’s move on yeah?

yn: okay well.. jungwon i think you bottle a lot of things up, intentional or not.

jungwon: *he sighs, crossing his arms* it’s not intentional i just think you guys have too many worries on your own plates to worry about mine.

kat: even if we have a lot going on that’ll never stop us from wanting to know what’s going on won

jungwon: i know i guess it’s just hard? to admit i need help?

sunoo: there’s never anything wrong with that

jungwon: thanks guys

riki: yeah yeah

jungwon: okay yn, im glad you like yourself more

kat: um

riki: wow!

sunoo: that is certainly a statement

yn: excuse me??

jungwon: no i worded that terribly

*the 5 of you burst out laughing at jungwons poor word choice. within this time giselle walks back in, closing the door slightly. the mics can’t pick it up but riki mouths “im sorry” to her. causing her to shake her head and smile. “it’s good” she mouths back making him smile back.*

jungwon: what i mean to say is that you’re more confident now. not just about yourself but your videos too. i’m glad to see this change in you

yn: thank you won, it means a lot

jungwon: of course

giselle: well this was certainly an episode

yn: one of us always ends up crying

sunoo: that sadist probably likes it too

jungwon: woah? the term isn’t sadist

*the rest of you laugh*

sunoo: let’s have a group hug! everyone up on your feet

*sunoo stands up, kat and giselle following suit. you and jungwon stand up and riki groans, then reluctantly stands up. the 6 of you huddle around one another and go for a group hug. the mics can’t pick up your voices but the recording has slight shuffling and giggles from you 6. after a couple seconds you pull apart and sit back down in your respective seats.*

giselle: i love you guys

kat: me too

sunoo: me three

jungwon: me four

yn: me five

*everyone looks at riki who only rolls his eyes*

riki: me six..

jungwon: well guys hope you enjoyed your stay in yap central we hope you didn’t cry too much. i have been your host jungwon and please make sure to check out our links in this description and like, share, subscribe, and comment! till next time!!

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AUTHORS NOTE » lol UMMMMMMM sorry guys i didnt realize how long it had been without an update WE ARE SO BACK THO

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[lqtraintracks]

20 Questions for Fic Writers

Thank you @maesterchill @danpuff-ao3 and @nv-md for the tag! <333

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

314

2. What’s your total AO3 word count?

1,295,054

3. What fandoms do you write for?

Harry Potter is the big one. I've also written some Captive Prince, Locked Tomb, and one Call Me By Your Name fic

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

Right Hand Red; Hung Like a Horntail; Slip Into My Lover's Hands; Weeds or Wildflowers (written with the very talented @unmistakablyoatmeal); and check this hand 'cause I'm marvelous

5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

I try. I'm seriously behind. The truth is, I'll never get around to replying to them all. I will someday die with a thousand unanswered comments. But I do try. And I read each and every one and they touch my heart. I'm so very grateful for all the wonderful comments I've received and continue to receive!

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

Oof. I hardly ever end things badly. But there was one wee ficlet; lemme go hunt it down. (*plays elevator music*) Ah, here it is: Not-Forever Is Still Forever. It's not MCD or anything. Draco just leaves for Argentina for two years. *shrug emoji* But I like to think I've gotten pretty good at baking some realistic angst into the middle of things, if not writing angty endings. I prefer it that way.

7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

All of them except for Burning the Ground, which is an open ending. I'll be honest, I don't like the word fluff. I'm never trying to write fluff, which, to me, denotes a level of uncomplicated sweetness. Maybe others define it differently. But I don't think happy endings are necessarily fluffy. I want my happy endings to put tears in your eyes, to move you. I want to evoke different things with different sorts of happiness for different phases of life. RHR's ending is about a feeling of freedom mostly, of getting to face the next part of their lives without dread. Take You Home has a similar vibe but with them a bit older; they've experienced the painful and mundane disappointments you have to weather in this life that have nothing to do with fighting a dark wizard and everything to do with existential questions about who we are, how we go on, what do you do when it doesn't work out, when you've changed and you don't know who you are anymore. I loved ending it with all their friends, at a march for trans rights. Heart Like Neon has an ending that makes *me* the most happy. I modeled it after an episode of Grey's Anatomy where you find out at the end of the ep that two important characters got married. The whole ep, none of their friends know, then at the end they play 'Bones' by Josh Record, and you go back in time by a few weeks and you see it. When I wrote the end of HLN, I had that song playing in my head from the end of the party at the Weasley's, to jumping three months earlier, to Harry and Draco in Paris. That's a pretty goddamned happy ending. It makes me cry. <3 (Also the art that @bluebutter-art made for it makes me bawl happy tears!!!)

8. Do you get hate on fics?

I was going to say hardly ever but then I *just* got some last week! LOL. Still, I'm very lucky that it's not even once in a blue moon. That stuff is so arbitrary too. I'm going to quote my good friend @elrhiarhodan: People... they're fuckin nuts. :D

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

LOL yes. A lot of different kinds? I want to try a little of everything as a writer.

10. Do you write crossovers? What’s the craziest one you’ve written?

No. I mean, I probably have a couple times over the course of my literal decades in some fandom or other, but they're not worth noting.

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Yes.

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

Yes, several, and into multiple languages. I think that's so cool!

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

Definitely! In HP I've written with sdk, @the-starryknight and @nv-md, plus I once did a wild round robin with a big group of people. I'm not good at round robins, I've realized. Too much of a control freak.

14. What’s your all time favourite ship?

Drarry, totally. But right up there is Harry/Teddy and Harry/Teddy/Draco. Then Ginny/Pansy, Charlie/Teddy, James Sirius/Albus Severus (with Teddy too sometimes). In CaPri, I love Damen/Laurent, but @linecrosser had totally made me ship when Damen lends Laurent out to Nikandros for a threesome and also Auguste/Laurent. I also hardcore ship my own original characters from my novel. <3

15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

I don't do WiPs really.

16. What are your writing strengths?

Oof, this is tough. Pacing? Interpersonal relationships? Smut, for sure. LOL. I think I do well writing things that are transgressive or maybe even filthy with a lot of tenderness and compassion and deep, deep love mixed in. And I think I'm getting really good at making people cry when I want them to. Readers, that is. :D

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

Convoluted plots. Can't do them. I wish I could. I can't write a mystery to save my life. I'm also pretty bad at heavy angst. I also wish I could write something nonlinear, but my brain just doesn't work that way.

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?

It's interesting that this is a question because it's meaningful to me not because of fic but because of my novel. I have a Spanish-speaking character, fluent in English, but sometimes he says things in Spanish. I'm very VERY lucky that @capiturecs read my novel both as a sensitivity reader for Latinx/Latine/Latino aspects but also to correct my Spanish and make it realistic and conversational! I'll be forever grateful! I also now really REALLY want to learn Spanish! <3

19. First fandom you wrote for?

Sorry, I don't share this publicly.

20. Favourite fic you’ve written?

Oh this is mean. This is cruel. I can't possibly answer this! RHR has got to be in there. Heart Like Neon. Blood and Fire. Phoenix in the Fire. Take You Home. Wonderful Electric (cover me in you). A Pain of Our Choosing. My Name in Your Mouth. Bloom. collarbones like a bow, skin an arrow to the heart. I'll stop there!

Okay, this was fun! I'll tag @corvuscrowned @ruinsplume @floydig @sweet-s0rr0w @lettersbyelise @magpiefngrl @skeptiquewrites and Elr! <3

[stormyoceans]

Monica I'm really scared. It's ep 11 next week. We haven't got Mork crying. (Sam mentioned to me that we haven't even gotten the day bawling scene from the trailer?) This eye donation thing seems a little bit too happy and hopeful for an ep 11.

I know this sounds bad but I really hope day doesn't regain his sight. Because everything the series built up about how blind people also are able to experience this world will all go down the drain. And some part of me knows p'aof will not do that. But then. It's so cruel. To give Day the eyes, the hope of vision just to yank it back so heartlessly. It's so mean. I am scared for next Friday monica.

i feel like i should probably wait to answer you because rn the episode is still too fresh in my mind and i don't have the emotional detachment necessary to be, if not positive, at least not utterly and embarrassingly overdramatic about this but. my mood really flipped a whole 180 degrees because of that ending and ngl. im not doing too well ;;;;;;;

FAIR AMOUNT OF NEGATIVITY UNDER THE CUT I ALREADY APOLOGIZE FOR IT

the thing is. i don't think the surgery next episode is gonna be successful, but i still so deeply dislike this eye donation plotline regardless of how it's gonna end because what's the point of it? if the surgery is successful and day gets his sight back, then it's gonna defeat the entire message of the show. if the surgery fails and day remains blind, then it just feels completely purposeless since he didn't need this to accept his disability and learn that he can still have a fulfilling life: he had already accepted this at songkhla, and it was perfect. honestly the only reason i can think of for them to go down this road is to have the surgery be unsuccessful now, only to end the series with day getting it again after some years and this time working out to show that 'you should never give up hope'. and i can't even begin to explain just how much that wouldn't sit right with me. and i mean i don't have a disability so i obviously don't have any right to say this, but still

not to mention that i actually still feel like those two moments with day and mork crying that we have yet to see are both related to the two of them breaking up because mork doesn't feel like he can take care of day, so they're gonna make him leave until he can prove to day's mom that he can provide for day. which is another thing i would hate

i just don't understand why would they choose all of this when, instead, p'aof could have had mork and day figuring out their future TOGETHER and BOTH trying to prove to day's mom that they can take care of EACH OTHER. like the show made such a point of making day become more independent and empowered but now they're not allowing him to be. i wanna see him walking outside alone with a cane, i wanna see him go back to school and finish his studies, i wanna see him open up his little bookstore while mork works as a cook. it can still happen, i guess, but i still wish it would have been given more focus

im also the kind of dramatic person who can't be like 'at least we have the first 9 episodes, they were perfect and nothing can ruin them'. unfortunately that's not enough for me. unfortunately i need them to stick the landing or it WOULD ruin the entire show for me. and not being able to get back to it and find comfort in morkday would honestly be heartbreaking for me. and you know, obviously the message and the representation of the show is the most important part in this, but also i would be lying if i said i didn't want to have a damn DVD box set of a jimmysea series to actually hold and enjoy since we won't ever have one for vice versa, but what would be the point of buying the last twilight one if i dislike the ending

ANYWAY. im really sorry ismay, i ended up ranting because i needed to vent but im afraid im only making you feel worse with this ;;;;;;; maybe after i sleep on it i will be a bit more optimistic about this but. im really scared too ;;;;;;; for what is worth im holding your hand and im here for you whatever is gonna happen

[djmarinizelablog]

Hello, Dj! Did you watch the last episode? Did you like it?

Hi, yes! I watched it on my own last Friday, and I appreciate all the hard work of MAPPA for animating the last few parts of Attack on Titan. The animation was amazing as always, and I'm sure they had to face a lot of internal and external pressure on how they would go about it.

That said, while I wished they could have cut the 1-hr ep into two 30-minute eps, I respect their decision to combine 4 chapters together as well as their interpretation of the manga. Chapters 131 and 132 were emotionally-heavy in terms of scenes (especially with the consequences of the Rumbling and Hange's sacrifice), while 133 and 134 had a ton of dialogue (with Armin strategizing with the Alliance in the plane and their negotiation with Eren in the Paths). The tone of the first half was completely different from the second half, and we definitely needed to breathe in between. I did like how they ended with the Alliance's entrance of them jumping off the plane, though! (self-plug: reminds me of Free-Falling aherm aherm)

MAPPA also went with a less melancholic song choice of Hiroyuki Sawano's Bauklötze (I was ready to bawl my eyes out had they chosen an instrumental version of Akuma No Ko). There's a line in their chosen song that goes, "We will fight until the burning wind takes our wings" and I think that fits Hange perfectly.

Another thing: Romi Park's delivery of her lines was different from what I expected. That doesn't make it bad, or anything. It's just... completely different. It sounded as if Hange reverted back to their old fanatical self in their last moments. (Whatever happened to character growth?) But I guess if the goal was to show that Hange's penchant for discovery and love for learning Titans never faded during their time as commander, then that makes sense for them to be so overwhelmed with seeing the Colossal Titans one last time that they didn't even notice the expression in Levi's eyes:

But we do have to remember that Attack on Titan is not a melodrama and definitely does not go for overtly romantic undertones, and MAPPA probably has budget and timing constraints in terms of production, so I'm interested on how they would animate the second part of the last episode of the final season in the end. (Do they realize how ridiculous this entire installment sounds?)

I do hope we get a director's commentary on why the producers went with their decisions (on pacing, on dialogues, and song choices), just so we can have some insight on what they wanted to portray versus what was actually portrayed.

Thanks for reading!

[odysseusilver]

About to rewatch the last two eps of Black Sails and I am ready to bawl my eyes out and go into a fugue state afterwards :)

[withleeknow]

oh I was absolutely NOT prepared for the ultimate soft-skz hours in the new ep. THE PAWS AND THEIR HAIRSTYLES WTFFFF. mimo's bear ears have me non-stop pouting:'( that coupled with ot7 bangtan hours this week - the way all platforms imploded after seeing yoongi's face like 🥺🥺 THAT'S OUR BOYYYY the impact of one photo on a whole fandoms' collective emotional state is insane

speaking of which (kinda), is the coldplay concert this weekend? hope you have the BEST TIME SINGING YOUR LUNGS OUT <3 also the fact this aligned so nicely w/ festa/your bday (idk why but this makes me so vicariously(?) happy ^-^) ♡

husband update: https://tinyurl.com/mr23s8pa the contrast b/w his vocals and jyp's is sending me ANYWHOMST-

also another present for your safe travels - https://we.tl/t-wj8V02Xdyg it's the sandwich of all sandwiches (not microwave safe) + I malfunctioned compiling this one 🫡

HELLO HELLO ONIGIRI HOW R U I'M FINALLY BACK HOME. HAVE THIS VIDEO OF ONE OF THE GREATEST MOMENTS OF MY LIFE (no joke) ❗️THE COLDPLAY CONCERT WAS FUCKING AMAZING. i genuinely, genuinely think that it's the best concert i will ever go to in this lifetime. it changed my life, and i don't think that's an exaggeration lol. so many things happening this month have made me so happy and i must say this takes the cake. it's like the perfect belated birthday present that me of last year gave me of right now 😭 they absolutely killed it and i loved it so, so much. nothing will ever top a coldplay concert for me. at my show, they sang an unreleased song live for the first time ever and it was so special and i will always have that memory and honestly i am tearing up rn just typing this and reminiscing last night lol. god. if you ever have the chance to go see coldplay, i would 10000% recommend it you will not regret it. i also filmed the entirety of my universe but tumblr won't let me attach 2 vids in one ask so maybe i'll add it in the next one lol

mimo in the new ep and yoongi reveal 😭 those two things happening back to back devastated me beyond repair. can you believe we finally got a boongi face reveal 😭 i've missed him so much. i still haven't watched the latest suchwita ep bc i know i'll just bawl my eyes out

yo i can't even focus on jypapi's voice bc what on god's green earth is this look... that is... an actual... husband... right there... the hair !! oh my god. if i start daydreaming about another man just know that it's on you. this is why i keep forgetting that he's younger than me bc how does he just look like that then??

the whiplash from husband to the other end of the sandwich bc WHAT is that !?!?!? the hair the glasses the shoulders... heeseung has always been very summer fling coded to me lmao and this is just further cements that concept in my brain. have i told you how much i dig this hair color bc it's really, really, really working for me...

[blueandgreenbutterflies]

I am watching the office for the first time!! 😃😃

[timotey]

#45: Ancient Love Poetry

✨Spoilers!✨

This drama completely took over my life. This hasn't happened to me since... since Word of Honor, I guess? And as much as I adored WoH, not even that drama moved me so deeply.

I wouldn't be able to tell you why exactly ALP touched me so much. I guess it was the theme of self-sacrifice? Of duty and honor and love? And of friendship that lasts hundreds of thousands of years and isn't treated as something, well, less?

Because one of the things that fascinated me was the bond among the three True Gods: Zhi Yang, Tian Qi and Bai Jue. They have known each other for hundreds and hundreds of thousands of years, they protected the three realms together and they died and were reborn in their service to the gods, the immortals and the mortals, and they did it with grace and dignity - and not a little mischief. They bickered and poked fun at each other and sometimes they didn't see each other for thousands of years but the warmth they felt for each other never lessened. And that was simply beautiful.

The main draw for me was Xu Kai as Bai Jue/Bo Xuan/Qing Mu - and he did an absolutely incredible job playing these characters who were one and the same person and not at the same time and at no point had I trouble telling the three of them apart. Even when Qing Mu and Bai Jue stood side by side, I knew who was who. Xu Kai is a truly gifted actor and this drama let him showcase that.

Many, many times was I moved to tears. The last two eps I pretty much bawled through. I stayed up way past midnight to finish the drama and I cried so hard that my heart is still aching this morning and my eyes are all swollen. It was so beautiful.

What I must mention and praise is the CGI. The scenery, the fights, all of them looked so amazing and so real that at no point was I torn out of what was happening, thinking "Looks fake." Especially the fights looked truly epic, like fights between gods should.

Thinking back, there were several moments that truly stood out for me:

When Bai Jue was forced to kill Tian Qi

When the True Gods imprisoned Xuan Yi - and when they later on defeated Wu Huan with the same method

When Qing Mu received Bai Jue's spear

When Qing Mu received the 81 lighting strikes and elevated his position to a demi-god

When Bai Jue and Tian Qi battled together at Bai Jue's second wedding

When Gu Jun died for Hou Chi/Shang Gu

When Tian Qi learned about Bai Jue's plan - and then the moment before the battle with Wu Huan, when he realized that Bai Jue was going to die soon

When Bai Jue talked to his son about the meaning of death

When Bai Jue gave himself over to the Doom of Chaos, dying for Shang Gu with a smile on his face because he managed to save her, after all

When Shang Gu came to the Swamp of Netherill and realized what Bai Jue had done...

So many wonderful moments, and that's just off the top of my head.

Also, the score. LAP's songs not only had a beautiful melody, their text was downright heartbreaking, "when she turns to ash, he guards the three realms for her."

This drama was... it was everything I could've wanted and more. I don't think I've ever rated a drama so high but, yeah, it's a 10.

Rating: 10/10

[ring-h]

Young Royals Season 2  - Ep 5 & 6.

Okay. The Last two episodes. 

I'm not afraid, I'm not afraid, I'm not afraid.

Go!

Ep. 5

Thank you Lisa for the shot with the fish. Best fan-service ever. ❤️☺️

Sandwich. ❤️ (second best)

Cute soft smiles. ❤️

Jan-Olof… the fuck is wrong with that man ?  😡🤬

Felice key-holder? Like…! Felice ❤️‍🔥Always my girl.

You can't say you regret the kisses when you wear purple, Simon, no one believes you my dear. ☺️

Okay, cat/August out of the bag. 😬

I like Santa-shrink. Didn't expect it.

Malin, it's time to make amends !

Ayub my boy, you summed up that really well ! A+ !

I won't empathize with in-love-August. You won't get me.

FULL PURPLE SIMON! 💜

I  want to read that Book about Siv and Malin so bad right now !!!

Simon is gonna be crushed when he'll learn about August and Sara. 😞

Holy… this is your decision Simon. I will support you!

I wanna throw up.

Them. ❤️🥹 

They laughed, like this is something we can laugh about?! I'm bawling my eyes out!! And Elias singing "holy"... ! 😭😭😭

-

Ep. 6

Holy fuck, Alexander. I knew this would bite us in the ass !

Okay, I'm gonna throw up. Like, the tension?!?

Me still not liking Marcus. (And yes he got cheated on, and he really liked Simon, and he was nice with him and so on,  but it's a 'Wilmon endgame only' space here and I'm not sorry.)

ALEXANDER !🤬😱

Could I hate August more? YES.

Felice is such a good friend! ❤️‍🔥 She deserves the fucking Moon.

August + Wille + Simon + GUNS… okay sounds promising. 😬

TOLD YOU IT WAS DANGEROUS! (It would just be another tragic hunting accident, I won't shed a tear.)

(The soundtrack is awesome)

The hug… because yes for Wille, she is yet still his mother. Wish she'd remember.

Switching to spanish to speak about serious stuff with her son when friends are around, is such a multilingual family thing. ❤️

Friendship break-up. No one speaks about how it hurts. 

Yes August, being an awful guy leaves you alone. Maybe that's a lesson you could learn from.

Let's start a revolution Wille. 🔥 I trust you.❤️‍🔥

Friendship. ❤️ Ayub❤️

Let's get ready to rumble!!

Jan-Olof 🤢

Breathe Wille!

Okay okay okay, tension rising. 

HE TOLD HIM! 😍❤️‍🔥🥹🤯🥳😭❤️ I'm bawling so much! It's not 'have a nice Christmas' anymore ! 🥳🥳🥳😭

Fucking Jan-Olof!!!!!

Ugly song compared to Simon's…

SARA NO!

Go sit back, you dickhead. Wille is handling this shit.

Yeah, Santa-shrink! 😘

Messing with the plan, my boy Wille is HANDLING THIS LIKE A PRO.🔥

Not Wille coming out, basically professing his love and making his love for Simon public just when Simon said he was okay with them being a secret! 🥹🥹🥹🥹😭😭😭😭

I cannot handle this. That fucking joy! Lisa Ambjörn you… you GODDESS!!! I'm gonna cry all night but I don't care!! 💜❤️‍🔥

(...and I'm gonna rewatch Jan-Olof having an aneurism 😈)

[mako-neexu]

86 EIGHTY SIX S2 EP11 (reaction but mostly screaming) PART 1

IVE BEEN WAITING FOR SO LONG FOR THIS EPISODE I COULDN’T WAIT TO WATCH IT BY THE TIME I FINISHED THE EP I WAS BAWLING MY EYES OUT

- i legit thought shin was dead but im thankful for his plot armor oh mygod

- god kiri.... i just want to hug the entire nouzen family

- ISTG THE SCENE WITH SHIN’S BROTHER MAKES ME so weaak i swear

-ugh the way shin stood up and his scarf covered him in the flashback???  god i love 86 so much

-SHIN’S ENTIRE TEAM COVERED IN BLOOD I WANT TO PERISH

-”Thank you, Shin”

-one thing i love about this show is that shin isnt the dark and brooding anime protag where he’s nothing but a badass. this episode showed every single emotion he had been keeping and i just--

-im so fucking weak right now

-”Why does every single one of them... leave me alone... die before me...And then tell me we’re the ones who fight to the end...That that’s what makes us who we are...”

-WHEN I SAW KURENA, RAIDEN AND THE OTHERS HAVING THEIR FOR BE LIGHTER AND RAIDEN SAID “We left you alone again, haven’t we?”

-I LOVE THIS SHOW’S USE OF THE BLACK FRAME. LIKE THEM USING IT TO INJURE SHIN’S ARM WAS A COOL USE OF IT.

-ITS ALSO A SYMBOL OF HIS MENTAL STATE god i love this show did you know that??????

-shin’s expressions in the entire episode

-thank you Chiba Shouya-san for voicing Shin!! you really nailed every emotion he felt!!

-when the remaining legion exploded, i really loved the fact that the light in his eyes returned wheeze XD

- ITS SHOUSA

- VLADILENAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA I MISSED YOU SO MUCH

- OH MY GOD SO THE FIELD ISNT REALLY BLUE ITS THE SAME AS THE OP IM GOING INSANE BJTCHCHH

-oh my godd my favorite ship ever THEYRE FINALLY MEETING PLEASE KISS HOLY SHIT

-why,,, why isn’t he getting out i know youre injured BUT OPEN THE HATCH

-SHAKES MY IRON BARS IF YOU TWO DON’T MAKE DIRECT EYE CONTACT THIS EPISODE--

-shes so beautiful and strong. her voice is unwavering holy shit im in love with lena

-”Will you come with me?” excuse me sir thats not how dates WORK?!?!?! get outta thereeeee

”I will stay in this country and continue to fight”.

-shin wanted to her to come with him.... but then when she voiced out her desires..... HIS EYES SOFTENED I LITERALLY CANT

-”Fight? Why? Are you in a hurry to die? Then you would’ve done better not to fight at all. “

-HER EYES. HER EYES. HER EYES!!!!!!!!!!!!

-CRAP THAT WAS SO GOOD. THE WAY SHE LITERALLY STEPPED ON THE BLACK FRAME OF THE EPISODE?!?!??! THAT WAS SO POWERFUL. DAMN

-”Even if I’m not strong enough to win, I won’t embarrass myself by giving up and falling to my knees.”

-”I’ll keep fighting until the very last moment of my life.”

“I know people who lived that way, and they believed that I could do the same.”

“So we...So I... will fight until I reach them, and until I can take them to what lies ahead!”

-i am so stunned i cant even speak verbally right now

-”I am Captain Vladilena Milize, the commander of the former Republic’s Defense Forces.”

-THE FRAME TURNED WHITE AND ITS DISAPPERARING IM GOING TO DISAPPEAR ON THE SPOT TOO I SWEAR I NEED TO SHAKE SOMEONE RGHT NOW

”And I will never run from this war!”

-those spider lilies.... the symbol of death IS EVERY WHERE AROUND THEM. AND HERE THEY ARE. LIVING. BREATHING. FIGHTING TO LIVE EVEN AS THOSE WHO LOVED THEM WILL EVENTUALLY DIE

”Major...”

-THE OP FORESHADOWED THIS!!?!??!?!?! I HAVE TO READ MY LIGHT NOVELS

-CANT THE TWO OF YOU HUG ALREADY

-”What duty do you have to the dead?” AND IT WAS FOLLOWED BY THE FKNGGGGGGGG FIREWORKS andA CERTAIN MEMORY WHO IS THE DIRECTOR OF THIS SHOW I NEED TO SHAKE THEM OVER HOW GOOD THIS IS

”They told me not to forget.”

-shin’s surprised face........please oh my god im breaking down.... im cryinggggggg this episode is too amazing

-”They told me about what would happen. About the Legion’s large-scale assault. And that’s how I survived.”

-”They wanted me to survive.”

-”They told me they wanted to see me again. And that’s why I can still fight.”

“So I want to be who they thought I could be. They’re gone now but I want to get to where they are. To catch up to them...”

-IS THAT THE WHITE PIG PRINCESS DRAWING IM GOING TO CRY EVEN MORE.IM RUNNING OUT OF TISSUES HERE

-”And this time...fight with them.”

THE ENTIRE 86 PICTURE. THE IMAGE. THE ENTIRE TEAM. NO ONE FORGOT.

-NO ONE EVER FORGOT

-”Because... I want to take them beyond this battlefield.”

-Shin.....Oh, Shin.......

-And oh boy lena is not yet done destroying my tear ducts--

[mrscolesprouse]

No I totally understand all of that. The writing is definitely better than Riverdale and I understood the cheating but it hurt non the less. The Riverdale cheating wasn't justified and ruined two relationships just to fit a sing in. Now a whole season later still hasn't fixed it and it's going to finish soon. Hopefully we can get bughead back together soon again.

I can understand Jules and why she did it. However, I look at her and think she wants to fix Rue and then she could fix someone who has an addiction as she couldn't help her mother.

The scene when jules calls her Sponsor broke my heart. She really wants to try this time around but her addiction ergues are too string mixed in her depression and massive trauma and grief of losing her dad. That grief is still raw fir the whole family.

As for Lexi and Fezco I absolutely adore them together. I love their dynamic. I love how Yes it's the bad boy and perfect girl next door stereotype but it's not at all. Their so similar and a like but yet so different.

I love when Maddy baby sits you can really see the caring side to her. She let's down all these walls.

A few episodes back I thought something was definitely going to go on between her and the mother with her asking her to unzip the dress and how that whole scene played out and then we rolled into the last episode with the pool scene and them having a heart to heart. But that could also be taken as Maddys found a mother figure she's comfortable with.

Even if their's a slight age gap between cassie's mom and the other woman it still could work as they may have been in a different year same Kapa house.

It's such a tricky situation with Cassie because yes they weren't dating but deep down it was wrong because she knew the history between Nate and Maddy.

The fact Nate actually gave Jules the tape was a massive shock. I do think that deep down he still loves them.

I wish Kat will be honest with Ethan but she can't as she's not honest with herself. Which is honestly the reality with so many people.

It's interesting what their doing this season I can't wait to see how it pans out.

*i wrote this all thing and then it got deleted so sorry for the delay*

*haven’t watched the last ep so NO SPOILERS PLEASE*

i agree with basically everything you’ve said.

i think jules really cares about rue but yes, would rather rue’s drug problem be fixed then help her get through this time, and i don’t mean ‘get through’ like support her drug problem, i just mean to show her what she has to live for, show her there’s someone there for her. and i know that’s a lot of pressure for jules to be under. but not being able to fix rue does not give her any excuse to cheat on her. (that’s kinda the basic gist of what i said but i can’t remember and i’m really mad cause it was a good explanation)

i think you meant rue but yes i just love that scene. zendaya’s acting is phenomenal. the scene, i think it was a couple eps back, when she walks into the church and labrinth is there, singing, and it switches to her dad was so moving, i was bawling my eyes out. i also love ali talking to gia about how she’s feeling.

I LOVE LEXI AND FEZ. listen, i love fez because i know he got caught up in this life as a kid and he doesn’t want it, he so desperately just wanted to go to lexi’s play and have a normal night. i love them.

i love the side of maddy we see this season. i mean obviously like my heart breaks for her but i loved seeing the vulnerable side to her. she really cares for the kid she babysits and i think maybe she’s projecting her need for a healthy companionship.

yeah i heard people were finding them sexual. i don’t know i didn’t really get that vibe i think it was the scene set up but i honestly think this older woman figure is great for maddy.

i think that would be a really interesting thing to explore, cassie’s mum and samantha (minka kelly) seeing a dynamic with people who aren’t teens are always interesting to be.

i don’t trust cassie as far as i can throw her. she’s pissing me off. she has a victim complex, has no self awareness, and completely shit on all her friends to be with guy who she KNOWS was abusive to her best friend purely because she’s got daddy issues. like babe, we’ve all got daddy issues, i’ve got MAJOR daddy issues, but i have good morals and would never do what she did, so yeah she’s pissing me off. like your dad leaving is not an excuse for you to be a shitty person to your friends. *spoiler alert my dad left, i’m not sleeping with my best friends *abusive* ex-boyfriend*

sorry.

i need a breath.

okay.

nate rubs me the wrong way, but i definitely think he was being genuine and sincere when he gave jules the tape. (also side note, the show didn’t confirm if jules was going to explore her gender identity further after the ‘fuck anyone who’s not a sea blob’ episode, i think we could see her clothing and makeup change up but i don’t know if she changed her pronouns to she/they. online it’s says she/her, but i’m not 100% sure if they’ve changed them, so i don’t mean to misgender jules by referring to her as ‘she/her’)

kat’s gaslighting scene was awful to watch. i hated it. ethan did not deserve that. she should’ve broken up with him and been done with it. the way she did it was very disappointing and made me lose respect for kat. not that we’ve seen ANY of her this season but i hated that. poor ethan. deserved better.

really excited to watch the last ep!!!!!

thanks for this ask i’m sorry it took so long to get an answer! if anyone responds, no spoilers from tonight’s ep! <3

[fizzingwizard]

Another Sunday, another episode of Digimon Adventure: (how tf do I do punctuate??). It is a good time to be a fan of Yagami Taichi.

I remember being 11 years old, the last episode of Digimon Adventure made be bawl my eyes out, and although I was excited for 02, really I just wanted more of Adventure. I guess I’m just slow to like new things (well, I am), but I would have super happy if the producers had been like, “02 will be a reboot for Adventure with the same characters and similar storyline.” And then do the same thing for every new Digimon season xD I’m sure I’m pretty damn alone in that opinion and don’t get me wrong, I love 02, and I think Tamers was good. And yet xD

^The screenshot that sums up the episode: Greymon gets his butt kicked while Taichi hangs on for dear life

I know the bond between children and Digimon is what powers them, and I’m kind of wondering if having a physical connection improves that in this show, because these kids are always riding around on their partners. (Not able exception - Togemon, because ouch. But I expect to see Mimi on her boxing glove at least lol) I have to rationalize it that way because otherwise it’s like why would having an elementary school kid on your head while you rush into the line of fire count as a battle strategy

This ep picks up pretty much where we left off, which means it’s probably only been hours since Yamato joined the group at the fortress. Already the atmosphere is completely changed.

I can see them, but they can’t see me... Ishida Yamato’s modus operandi

more below

Here is a very Digimon-esque tableau: everyone gathered around Koushirou and his computer. Yamato still being standoffish. I imagine he jumped at the chance to stand guard at the entrance so he doesn’t have to get too close to anyone.

Agumon’s fight with MetalTyrannomon went... not so great. Yamato coolly tries to explain to Taichi that evacuating was the only way, otherwise they’d risk all being destroyed, and that would be the end of everything.

Taichi’s fist tightens and begins to shake...

... he doesn’t look like he totally agrees with Yamato’s reasoning, but he doesn’t have a better idea. But, being Taichi, he can’t just let it rest.

Yamato talking to Taichi’s back while Taichi frantically starts to sort out his Feelings is just how they communicate. This is a common shonen anime trope for the hero and his foil. Yamato’s pushing, Taichi’s not exactly hiding, but he doesn’t want to face him until he can face him with resolve.

Yamato: Look at me. Look at me!

Taichi: *sweating* It feels like a hole’s burning in the back of my neck, so... I’ll pass

Taichi finally explains out what’s got him so knotted up: he regrets Ogremon’s death. Like we saw last episode, the battle that began as revenge turned into a battle of samurai pride. And Taichi is evidently a samurai. He wanted to see that battle to the finish, out of mutual respect for the opponent (who he’d never met before and who had been trying to kill him previously... but y’know when you’re kindred spirits that’s all water under the bridge)

Yamato doesn’t really get it. This is where these two are fundamentally different. Taichi attac, Yamato protec, then everybody gets a FIGHT!

I mean, not 100% of the time, but the bottom line is Yamato’s not so big on this pride thing, although he does have pride of his own. But he’s definitely not into taking unnecessary risks, especially if it puts his friends in danger. The trouble is, Taichi doesn’t think he takes unneccessary risks either... just necessary ones ;)

The other kids can already feel the tension increasing and Taichi and Yamato haven’t even raised their voices at each other yet. Lol buckle up kiddos

Jou wonders if he should make them stop, and Mimi instantly turns around and begs him to try. My Joumi heart LEAPT.

TBH I was surprised she did anything at all, I was expecting Jou’s “Should I break them up?” to just end there with nothing happening. Instead we got an adorable Joumi moment where Mimi shows that as much as she teases him, she already somewhat relies on Jou (to be fair, I do think Mimi’s the type to rely on anyone who offers when she’s not sure what to do herself). Jou, being Jou, is unprepared aaaaand wigs out.

Jou: Oh no oh no oh no she actually expects me to get between them?!?! But but I flunked Tough Guy school! That’s literally why I’m a nerd! This girl’s trying to throw me to the wolves!

Fortunately for Jou, he has a redheaded savior.

Sora: Stop it. He’ll wet his pants again and I don’t have any more extras.

Sora shows her insight into people’s hearts and understands that Taichi and Yamato need to hash things out. It’s not dangerous... yet. But the way she’s more or less frozen in place along with the others says she’s... maybe a bit on her guard, at least, lol.

Koushirou, being Kousihrou, is completely oblivious to all of this and focused on his computer.

Oh yeah... the real reason Taichi turned his back to Yamato earlier - whenever they look directly at each other, they suck each others souls out. I CALL BODY SWITCH

I mean jogress

I mean marriage

They spend like the entire first half of the episode arguing omg get a room.

Then... Agumon wakes up!

And even though it’s a cartoon, it’s clear to see the way Taichi’s body fills with relief. I wonder if Yamato didn’t realize or didn’t think Taichi was that worried about Agumon. 99 Yamato tended to feel that Taichi was insensitive to others. But while he can be, Taichi also doesn’t express his emotions in the same way as Yamato. They’re both wont to hide how they feel, but while Yamato goes quiet and aloof, Taichi just acts like everything’s normal. So maybe here, Yamato really thought Ogremon and MetalTyrannomon were the only things on Taichi’s mind. Just a guess.

Awwww montage of cute...

a boy and his dinosaur!!

Maybe to Yamato’s surprise, Agumon totally echoes Taichi’s feelings about Ogremon. “I wanted to settle the score with him.” Weird as it sounds, they made a manly bond with Ogremon and running away just doesn’t sit right. Agumon’s raring to go...

... but his stomach isn’t quite ready yet hahaha.

Yamato’s probably used to Gabumon’s appetie but I suspect Agumon’s tummy growl has errr exceptional resonance

Glad to see the return of the Digimon’s bottomless pit aka stomach. I think it was just last week I complained about that not really being a thing so far. This time it was the other Digimon who went gathering, but I hope to see the human kids rushing around in a frenzy to care for their partners’ appetites soon lol

While the others eat, Taichi and Yamato decide they haven’t finished vampiring each other’s souls and sneak out to the mouth of the cave. Sora follows them to see if she can watch any hot yaoi action.

Lol but I do really like the framing heart. All we can see of the boys is their shadows. Sora keeps her distance but she’s watching them intently from a distance. I assumed she was just gathering more data on how short a leash she needs to keep them on.

Turned out that was not quite correct... reluctant to interrupt though she’d been before, once they start talking about what to do next she adds her input. We’ve got Yamato on Taichi’s one side and Sora on his other side. It’s the beginnings of TAIORATOOOOO *more airhorns*

^I can’t see anything but Goku and Vegeta bahahaha. Also why is eleven-year-old Yamato SO broad-shouldered, between that, his deeper voice, and his perfeclty coifed hair Taichi must seem like a toddling infant to him bahahaha. Like come on Yamato is not a child you must be kidding

Already Yamato is getting into the habit of Looking At Taichi while Taichi Looks At Literally Anything Else.

These two don’t need words. They talk with their vampiric eyes.

Koushirou’s hyper focus on his computer finally pays off and they all gather back around. Everyone starts cheering when the hologram appears even though they don’t know what the heck it is. This is Koushirou, so it must be awesome!

It turns out to be a map of much usefulness.

And it turns out Ogremon was telling the truth about the path to the holy Digimon being straight ahead, while fires Taichi up even more.

^Obligatory ‘Gomamon is cutest Digimon’ cap

Koushirou also gives Taichi special data on MetalTyrannomon, including his weak point. Taichi is THRILLED. He’s happier about this than he is about finding the route to the holy Digimon. This is the difference between Taishiro and Taito guys. When Taichi gets a reckless idea, Yamato tries to talk him down, or at least be sensible about it. Koushirou? Koushirou is a FREAKING ENABLER.

They wait with baited breath for Yamato’s reaction. Though he seems underwhelmed, Yamato admits Koushirou’s information “does seem reliable.” That’s all the permission Taichi needs to go back to freaking out over how awesome Koushirou is.

They come up with a plan to lure MetalTyrannomon away so Taichi can fight him while the others take the chance to escape and head towards the path to the holy Digimon.

^Obligatory ‘Sora is best girl’ cap

Yamato waits for the others to get away before following after... he stalls for a minute as if unsure whether it’s really alright to leave Taichi on his own. In the end he joins the group... All things considered, I think he’s pretty thrown off by Taichi, tbh.

Yamato’s group doesn’t make it far before they encounter a very suspicious looking lake.

^More evidence that Yamato is not really an elementar school kids. He’s clearly at least 15. He’s been routinely failing every year in order to get held back until he can be in the same class as Takeru. That’s the extent of his overprotectiveness

It sure is fortunate that Koushirou’s genius extends to fluency in English or they’d have no idea this lake of dark mist is bad friggin news.

Or... maybe they would have:

Mimi sneaks behind Jou and pulls his middle school exam workbook out of his bag.

And immediately chucks it into the lake.

Where it disintegrates.

This is how Mimi’s mind works. She’s smart! They need to know what would happen if they went into the lake without actually going in it. So they need to put something else in first. So far so good. What should she throw? A stick? A rock? One of Sora’s endless towels?

No, Jou’s workbook. Duhhh.

She probably felt she was killing two birds with one stone here x’D Experiment complete, and Jou prevented from anymore whining about not having time to study. Mimi is chaotic good.

gosh I love Joumi

Jou is lawful neurotic

Greymon shielding Taichi is just soooo cute even if it still feels weird that he has to be up there in the first place

The battle rages between MetalTyrannomon and Greymon, who just won’t quit even though he’s losing... pretty bad... I mean...

He just grabbed a missile with his bare hand...

Taichi: Now I know what it’s like to be a firework

Loop-de-loop! Taichi’s suction cup shoes strike again.

Courage going UP!! Reaching a fever pitch! The evolution that’s been looming for two episodes finally happens!

MetalTyrannomon: Eat my dust!

Woooooooo, MetalGreymon is just as freaky as ever. Always my least favorite evolution in Agumon’s line, but the glowy purple wings are cool.

Also, nipple missiles.

MetalTyrannomon: I can’t believe I was beaten by some meddling kids!

So yeah, we are back to killing Digimon willy-nilly. None of this “but what about their hearts?” shitck. Always found it amazing in 02, a children’s cartoon, that said “Yeah the characters you loved last season were totes murderers but it was justified and sometimes you just have to kill.” And fourteen-year-old Taichi is just like, “Yeah, I’m a murderer, and you should be too.” XD And Miyako hits LadyDevimon with a skateboard. Priceless

This scene is adorable but Taichi’s butt looks so saggy.

I’m kind of wondering how evolution works in this show. They jumped right to jogress in like episode two or something, but we haven’t seen it since (I would sort of expected Taichi to think of it when it was clear MetalTyrannomon was too strong, though I would also expect Yamato to nix that idea both because he doesn’t want to and because to him it’s a pointless fight and not the priority). Since then, the Champion level evolutions went similar to 99 Adventure, with everyone getting their special episode, and I’m sure that’s how it’ll go down with the next level too, but there was no gap at all between going from one level to the next. I’m trying to say, they seem able to reach the next level awfully fast. They didn’t need to meet Gennai and collect the tags and Crests, the Crests appear already uploaded in their Digivices. I’m not complaining, as always I’m glad this show is not just a carbon copy of the old one, but I am curious if evolutions are easier to attain in this series, or if there are going to be more of them and that’s why they come so quick, or if the series just won’t run long enough for there to be significant gaps of time between evolutions.

Episode ends with the group deciding, like I predicted last week, to split up and try the Left and Right routes, since the Straight one is blocked. Gays go right and lesbians go left, of course. :P

This episode was pretty fantabulous, I loved it, Digimon is awesome.

Next week it’s no surprise what we’re gonna get.

WeeeeereGarurumon! Also my least favorite evolution of Gabumon’s line but still cooler than MetalGreymon hahahaha.

I’m also totally stoked for the grouping of Yamato, Jou, and Sora. There’s tons of potential for Yamato and Sora to bond, although my prediction is that while he’ll pretty much like her (even if he won’t admit it to himself), she’s going to find him a little difficult. But she’ll have an easier time talking to him than the others do. I also fully expect Jou to drive Yamato out of his mind lol.

This also means the other group is Taichi, Koushirou, and Mimi. I assume we won’t see too much of them next week, but I hope that means they’ll get their episode the week after, because I am dying for some Taishiro moments. Practically salivating. Also, Koumi fans can probably look forward to Mimi and Koushirou Not Getting each other too, lol

[eabhaalynn]

My 11 Songs of the Decade (because 10 would be boring and is overdone.)

Cigarette Daydreams – Cage the Elephant

The song… This is the closing song of Cage the Elephant’s 2013 album, Melophobia, and the third single released from this album. It describes the pain of someone’s search for their own identity through the musings of a parted lover.

For me… To this day, this is the song I cry to. This always has been me and my friend Iona’s song. It will forever be inseparable from the Ulster Museum and Botanic Gardens in Belfast, from rainy summer’s days and rants about our seemingly massive problems with GCSEs and girls from school. When she went abroad for her gap year, I couldn’t bear to listen to it. It’s another one of these songs that manages to articulate what it feels like to be young and thinking too much.

Key lyric…If we can find a reason, a reason to change Looking for the answer If you can find a reason, a reason to stay Standing in the pouring rain

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uvVJ0v6Vta8

Ribs – Lorde

The song… This is a deep house influenced electronica song that discusses Lorde’s stress over ageing. It was released on her debut album, Pure Heroine, in 2013. It begins ambiently and builds to become increasingly more frantic as the song progresses.

For me… Despite being released when I was a young teenager, this song was written when Lorde was sixteen or seventeen. It articulates exactly what it feels like to be that age, at that stage of life. I’m quite sure teenagers across the globe can relate to that. This song has been the soundtrack of my teenage years, the imagery is both relatable and accessible. Listening now, it gives me a sense of nostalgia, a yearning to be back where I was a year, or two or three years ago. Even now, it is the sound of being alone in a crowd. It is musically perfect, and a piece of exceptional songwriting.

Key lyric…This dream isn't feeling sweet We're reeling through the midnight streets And I've never felt more alone It feels so scary, getting old

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4qaeoz_7cyE

Sign of the Times – Harry Styles

The song…  This is Harry Style’s debut single as a solo artist. It was released in early 2017 and appears on his self-titled debut album. It is a power ballad with eclectic influences from genres such as soft rock, indie rock, glam rock and psychedelic soul. It features Styles’ vocals alongside choral harmonies throughout. It is essentially about avoiding emotion during times of grief and hardship.

For me…This is the song of me leaving school (for the first time). Listening to it now coughs up all the feelings of relief, and yet uncertainty. Excitement, but also nerves. Summer 2017 was a turning point for me. I had had a terrible couple of years over my GCSEs, and overall, my second school was a far better place for me to be than my first one ever was. At the time though, I didn’t know this. Sure, how could I? This song helped me figure out my feelings, and make sense of feeling happy when I really didn’t know what I should have felt at all.

Key lyric…We don't talk enough, we should open up Before it's all too much Will we ever learn? We've been here before It's just what we know

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qN4ooNx77u0

Ride – Lana Del Rey

The song… This song comes from Lana Del Rey’s third EP, Paradise, released in 2012. It served as the first single of this re-release. It is a ballad that includes, among other themes, parental problems, loneliness and alcohol misuse. Del Rey sings over a string drenched, piano driven melody.

For me… This is the song of every summer. It has never been an exceptionally happy song for me, but it is the embodiment of what it is to feel young and alive, if a little bit tired. The glamour of it, alongside the acknowledgement that everything isn’t perfect, but that they will be okay if you just go with the flow, was exactly what I needed at the time it was released. The blissful uncertainty of the summers of being 14 and 15, partnered with the irrelevance of the future, is exactly what this song will always be about for me.

Key lyric… Been trying hard not to get into trouble But I, I've got a war in my mind I just ride, just ride

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Py_-3di1yx0

Don’t Delete the Kisses – Wolf Alice

The song… This is the second single from Wolf Alice’s second album, Visions of a Life. It is characterised as dream pop, synth pop, shoegaze and indie rock. Frontwoman Rowsell referred to it as “one of those, you know, ‘head out the window on a long drive’ kind of tunes.’

For me… If ‘ribs’ is the sound of being seventeen, then surely this is the sound of falling in love. This song is the ultimate love song. I am absolutely convinced of it. It is greater than any one person as it is simply the sound of the feeling. I am very lucky that I actually was falling in love for the first time at the time this was released. I will always be indebted to Ellie Rowsell for being there to tell me in plain English how I was feeling. This song has defined every ‘lovey dovey’ mood I have been in for the last two and a half years. I’m sure most people of my age feel the same. It was written for the era we are living in and it is perfectly suited to it.

Key lyric…I see the signs of a lifetime, you 'til I die

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WqxE-zppu30

Motion Sickness – Phoebe Bridgers

The song… This is the third single from Phoebe Bridger’s 2017 Debut album ‘Stranger in the Alps.’ It describes “being in love with someone who is super mean to you… like conflicted feelings.” Bridger’s stated to radio station KCRW that the song was written about fellow musician Ryan Adams.

For me… Admittedly, I discovered this song late in the decade. But it’s a song about feelings. Like, really hard feelings. This decade, and especially the latter half of it, threw up a lot of feelings, about a lot of things. I suppose this is fairly standard for most people approaching the end of their teenage years. It’s angsty, without being too bothered about anything. It’s raw and honest; articulating everything I’ve felt about everyone at one stage or another, and I’m equally, I’m sure it articulates enough people’s feelings about me.

Key lyric… You said when you met me you were bored And you, you were in a band when I was born

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9sfYpolGCu8

A & E – Brand New Friend

The song… This illustrates the rise and fall of a relationship, and in doing so highlights the more melancholic acoustic side of Northern Irish indie pop group Brand New Friend. It was initially released in 2016 as the closing song of their debut EP, American Wives, but was remastered and re-released on their 2017 album Seatbelts for Airplanes.

For me… This is the song of the medicine application. Bearing in mind I know this band, and know that there is a well-developed meaning to the song that has nothing to do with me, this is the song that I have listened to, and seen live, countless times from the day I decided I wanted to be a doctor to the day I got into medical school and beyond. It is a rare and beautiful connection to have to a song like this, and one for which I am forever going to be grateful. Now, I can’t hear the song live without bawling my wee eyes out. I have come so far, and the band have too, and the song has been with us every step of the way. That truly means the world to me.

Key lyric… She wants to be a paramedic / Wants to save a strangers life / Now she wants to hold my hand / Does she know she’s saving mine?

https://open.spotify.com/track/5RmOfF1s5zW2B942H9OGXT?si=hsauA8iXQN6mXQnL8s0fBw

Brazil – Declan McKenna

The song… McKenna initially self-released this song in December 2014. It is critical of FIFA, of their awarding of the 2014 World Cup to Brazil without addressing the deep rooted and extensive poverty affecting the Nations people. It gained widespread media attention throughout the FIFA corruption scandal, before featuring on his debut album, ‘What do you think about the Car?’ in July 2017. It is an indie rock song that is driven by guitars and synths.

For me… This song was the sound of 2016 and 2017. It was released a while before this but I was fairly late jumping on the bandwagon. It’s a political song, speaking of the injustices behind FIFA and their 2014 World Cup in Brazil. As an angry little leftist, I have always appreciated this. I can only appreciate it more knowing that Declan McKenna himself was only fourteen when he wrote it. For me the song has many happy memories attached to it, from the long summer walks from my house to the nearest village to see my friends who were working as sailing instructors, to attending a tiny gig of Declan McKenna’s in the Oh Yeah Centre in Belfast and being about 6 feet from his face while he was 6 feet from the cusp of fame.

Key lyric…Because you've had your chances, yeah you've had enough I'm gonna burn your house down to spread peace and love

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=duHjQ3BE6D8

Robbers – The 1975

The song… This is the sixth single from the 1975’s self-titled debut album. It was released as a single in May 2014. The song’s concept follows an ill-fated robbery, and was inspired in part by the 1993 film ‘True Romance.’ It is essentially about a relationship in which the partners are too focused on each other to notice the destruction they are each causing.

For me… This song is fairly definitive of my teenage years as a whole. The narrative of a toxic relationship that the writer could not, or would not leave, was one that I always managed to connect to, across all aspects of my life as a young teenager, encountering uncomfortable situations within school and with different people and groups of friends. Matty Healy was (and honestly still is) one of the biggest crushes I’ve ever had. I’ve now heard this song live three different times, at three completely different phases of my life. It is a song with so much meaning, and yet one that has grown and evolved with me throughout the decade.

Key lyric… Now everybody's dead And they're driving past my old school And he's got his gun, he's got his suit on She says, 'Babe, you look so cool'

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Iyy3YOpxL2k

Get Well Soon – Ariana Grande

The song… This is the final song on Grande’s 2017 album ‘Sweetener,’ it is a soul ballad with layered vocals, and is inspired by Grande’s personal anxiety and trauma following the May 2017 terrorist attack following her concert in Manchester. In memory of the 22 victims of this attack, there is a 40 second moment of silence at the end of the song.

For me… I am, and have been, a very anxious person for a very long time. This is something I have never really hid away from, but also never felt up to talking openly about. This song manages to describe the feelings associated with anxiety in a way I have never heard any mainstream musician attempt before. Ariana’s concert which was attacked in May 2017, that which inspired this song, immediately followed her concert that my father and sister had attended, and so the whole song and sequence of events is and always has been very close to home for me.

Key lyric…I'm too much in my head, did you notice? (Girl, what’s wrong with you? Come back down)

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hXU4P6j3TNY

She’s Thunderstorms – Arctic Monkeys

The song… This is the first song from the fourth studio album by arctic monkeys; Suck it and See, released in 2011. It originated when Alex Turner was looking for a new way of complimenting someone. It begins with an Eastern inspired riff and is fairly heavily guitar led, characteristic of this period in the Arctic Monkey’s discography

For me… I’d be lying if I said this isn’t one of my favourite songs of all time. I chose it for this list because it is my favourite song by the arctic monkeys, who are my favourite band. Its subject, Alexa Chung, basically leads the life I wish I had. Even more so at the time this song was written than now. I remember being twelve or thirteen and just wanting someone to write something like this for me. The sheer detail of the lyrics is beautiful and so captivating, they played a huge part in helping me find my love for music in an accessible way. I loved, and still do love, the relationship they had. I feel like it translated so well into his music, and into the popular culture that shaped my teenage years exceptionally well.  

Key lyric…Here is your host, sounds as if she's pretty close When the heat starts growing horns She's thunderstorms

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SQSQnHh4rPE

[agirlwithpurplesouls]

I wanna personally send a letter saying how bad the last ep of dodosolsollalasol was, they had me BAWLING my eyes out for two ep (haven’t cry that hard in months) just for them to gives us that ending, they deserved better final eps😔

[phantomrose96]

new episode. new liveblog. new episode. new liveblog.

Giyuu in the cold-open scene: -does absolutely nothing- me: Oh. Oh fantastic. I’m so glad you’re back. Oh I’d die for you.

The outfits are so goddamn pretty in this show. And Shinobu’s is the new reigning champion of “fuck thats pretty”

Spider-Dad fucking skipped Inosuke across the water. 3 times. like a rock

Yeah uh.... Inosuke acknowledging he’s injured must mean he’s truly fucked.

Inosuke is running away while waist-deep in the water. That’s like the HARDEST way to run away. Get on land with Tanjiro you moron.

Team Rocket Tanjiro is blasting off again

Like Spider-Dad just home-runned him outta the fucking forest. With a cut-down tree. The Kimetsu fight dynamics are fucking wild.

Tanjiro: “Inosuke, don’t die until I get back!” Inosuke: “...” Inosuke: “...” Inosuke: “Wonder why Kentaro wants me to die once he gets back.”

me prior to this episode: “I think that Riu spider kid is the actual member of the twelve demon moons.” Tanjiro: “Be careful Inosuke that Spider Dad is the Twelve Moon Member!” me, genre-savvy and aware of what misdirection is: “Okay so Riu is DEFINITELY the Twelve Moon member”

Yall I’m still wildly emo about Zenitsu being left to just... die alone... doing his best to resist the poison but like, fuck what can he even do beyond just lie there and hope? I’m really emo. Last episode fucked me up.

FUCK that’s a pretty aesthetic.

They’re really doing the MOST with that full moon. Like the full moon serves the functional purpose of letting the MadLad trio actually see and fight at night in the forest. But aesthetically? the most.

Shinobu: Yoo hoo? Hey buddy u fucking ded?

Kentaro’s out here pissing off powerful demons cuz he can’t keep his opinions about family to himself.

Generic looking background character: -appears- me: Oh he’s absolutely dead.

Tanjiro, seeing his 8th Extremely Traumatizing thing of the day: “I need a new job”

The way they’re playing with color to make Riu balls-to-the-walls terrifying is just... really good.

The slow and staggered creep of the camera, the music swell, the colors. Its all really good.

Inosuke:

Inosuke’s brain: 

THE FUCKING POP NOISE WHEN INOSUKE REALIZES “hey wait why the FUCK am i running away?”

THEY FUCKING GAVE HIM DENSER LINES. AND FROZE HIM IN PLACE. FUCKING POP. FUCKING NYOOM.

Inosuke, using his one sword to hammer in his other sword: I beat a mother-fucker with another mother-fucker

THE MOST. SELF-AWARE DUMBASS. NOTHING BUT RESPECT FOR IDIOCY THAT KNOWS ITS OWN IDIOCY.

He can’t READ.

Inosuke has two swords.

Tanjiro vs. Riu set to Undertale’s ‘Spider Dance’ track 

“What doesn’t hurt, doesn’t hurt!” Inosuke... honey.... that’s not healthy...

Fun fact that was revealed earlier in the manga but not translated to the anime: Inosuke’s ability to ‘sense’ out the location of enemies is due to his superior sense of touch. Complementing Tanjiro’s sense of smell, and Zenitsu’s hearing.

the blood smudge on Inosuke’s boar mask looks kinda like the typical anime blush marks, and when we only see his left half of his face it throws me every time

Inosuke literally every moment since his introduction: I’m the best! No one can beat me! I’ll fight anyone! I’ll fight you! I’ll fight your dog! I’ll fight myself! I’m never injured and I’m never hurt and I’m never tired! Anything Monjiro can do I can do even better! There’s no way to beat me in a fight and I’ll never surrender! Inosuke... in this episode:

I’m fucked up all over again...

First Zenitsu now Inosuke

And with Zenitsu it’s at least... expected of his character to want to give up. Not Inosuke. Never Inosuke. That’s fucked up. I’m fucked up. 

Again the color palette. This time the desaturation is what just... drives home the feeling of hopelessness. It’s so good.

Tanjiro: “Whatever you do, don’t die Inosuke” me, clutching my heart: “fuck”

Hey y’know extra sad how all the people who have ever cared about Inosuke, who flash before his eyes while he’s dying, are people we’ve met in series. Inosuke really went 15 straight years of his life with no one ever giving a damn about him.

Inosuke: “No... actually, I WONT lose! I wont! come at me monster!” Spider-dad: -punts Inosuke like a pinball across three separate trees-

It’s like the rock-skipping-across-water but now so much more painful.

He’s literally.... crushing Inosuke’s skull... in order to kill him... Inosuke’s been training specifically to toughen his head... Because he’s mad Tanjiro was able to knock him out with a headbutt... Inosuke might survive SPECIFICALLY because of that dumb grudge... I’m emo again.

His big pretty green eyes are still... funny.

He’s so so young in this it left me wondering “how does Inosuke remember the name his mother gave him” .... and then i remembered:

His name’s written on his fucking underwear. It’s the only piece of identity his mother left him... Fuck.

This leads me to two conclusions: 

1) Inosuke must have transferred his name - despite not even being able to read the words - onto all his clothing since then. 

2) He must have, at some point, asked someone who can read to tell him what it says...

Inosuke, moments from death, remembering the image of his mother’s face for the first time: Who... who are you? me, bawling: you’re supposed to be the comic relief.

fuck YES IT’S GIYUU TIME.

Tomioka “Cool guys don’t look at explosions” Giyuu

Inosuke: “I’ve never seen anyone as cool as this guy.” me: “bitch me too, the fuck.”

Please I just want Giyuu to stick around. If anything, as the only real adult. Also because he’s really fucking cool and I have a type. 

Inosuke: -attacks Spider-Dad earlier in the ep- Inosuke: -his blades snap- me: :0  Tanjiro: -attacks Riu’s spider thread- Tanjiro: -his blade snaps- me:

<:0 !!!!!!!!