#i am truly sorry if the second option is confusing i tried my best to explain

[vickyvicarious]

I feel sorry, really and truly sorry, for two of the poor fellows. Oh, Mina, I am so happy that I don't know what to do with myself. [...] You and I, Mina dear, who are engaged and are going to settle down soon soberly into old married women, can despise vanity. Well, I must tell you about the three, but you must keep it a secret, dear, from every one, except, of course, Jonathan. You will tell him, because I would, if I were in your place, certainly tell Arthur. [...] Arthur has just gone, and I feel in better spirits than when I left off, so I can go on telling you about the day. [...] It seems that a man always does find a girl alone. No, he doesn't, for Arthur tried twice to make a chance, and I helping him all I could; I am not ashamed to say it now. [...] I do not know myself if I shall ever speak slang; I do not know if Arthur likes it, as I have never heard him use any as yet. [...] Oh, why must a man like that be made unhappy when there are lots of girls about who would worship the very ground he trod on? I know I would if I were free—only I don't want to be free. My dear, this quite upset me, and I feel I cannot write of happiness just at once, after telling you of it; and I don't wish to tell of the number three until it can be all happy.

Lucy and Arthur are super cute together collection. It's clear throughout her letter that she wants to tell Mina everything in order, and give proper due to the two men whose proposals she rejected. But throughout, her excitement at having Arthur's feelings for her confirmed keeps bubbling up. She's at her most playful at the start of the letter, jokingly superior about how she and Mina are practically old married women above such things already. She comes back multiple times to the idea of her married life with Arthur, when she will tell him everything, when she'll learn if he likes slang (continuity error there, but she's anticipating using the same kind of language as him). Later on she emphasizes that she doesn't want to be free, has been trying her best to help Arthur get a chance to propose, she doesn't want to talk about him until she can do so with all her focus on how happy she is with him.

When she stops the letter for a while, she mentions Arthur has just left. This gives us a couple options. First: he's been there since his proposal, just hanging out. This is super cute because it suggest that he wants to spend as much time with her as he can right away. Also super cute because it means Lucy was so excited to share her news with Mina that she started writing the letter while he was still there (perhaps once he got pulled into a conversation with her mother?). And then she felt she needed to go through it all in the proper order, and when she got caught up in her sadness about Seward, Arthur returned to cheer her up again enough that she was ready to continue the letter when he finally had to leave. Adorable. Second: Arthur left after his successful proposal, and Lucy began writing to Mina. But then he was so happy that he came back again to spend more time with her. Maybe even this time was an anticipated/official visit that her mother knew about, and he snuck in first to propose because he'd been trying and kept missing his chance. Either way it's so so cute. Imagine him showing up for a formal visit and just constantly looking to Lucy so excitedly before he drops the news that he has asked for and been granted her hand. Or she's writing her letter, gets sad, takes a break, then gets surprised with another unexpected visitor - but it's Arthur again, too giddy to stay away for long. And then he sees she is upset and helps her to feel better before he has to leave again. Adorable.

And, of course, the pinnacle:

P.S.—Oh, about number Three—I needn't tell you of number Three, need I? Besides, it was all so confused; it seemed only a moment from his coming into the room till both his arms were round me, and he was kissing me. I am very, very happy, and I don't know what I have done to deserve it. I must only try in the future to show that I am not ungrateful to God for all His goodness to me in sending to me such a lover, such a husband, and such a friend.

The excitement, too jumbled to even talk about clearly! The deep affection and feeling so happy she doesn't know how she could deserve it. That ending, where she loves his friendship, his romantic affection, and the domestic life together she anticipates with him. The fact that she was going to leave this to another letter because she didn't want to be sad when she wrote it. But then she couldn't not gush about him at least a little and came back to add it in a PS.

They're super duper cute together, I love them.

[idgivemyeyesfor-mattmurdock]

omg omg omg ok i just had the most random idea - this may be a slightly long one but

what if y/n is a teacher/nun in the church, and takes care of matt while he stays there post explosion. they get closer and eventually date, and y/n ends up pregnant. maggie argues with both of them and accidentally lets slip that she doesn't want y/n to live the same life that she did - because the murdock boys are the same

and thats how matt finds out who his mother is and y/n comforts him (awww)

sidenote: i'm just gonna stop asking anonymously lol

Part One:

hope ur ok - Olivia Rodrigo

Pairing: Matt Murdock x Fem reader Trigger Warning: if ur allergic to fluff then back away.

A teacher. You, a teacher?

Well, who could doubt it? you weren't that religious that you'd become a nun, but a teacher was a happy medium. Actually, you had never been to a church before, but you took the job offer when St.Agnes's was offering it... but truly you had always wanted to teach.

Teaching children was the equivalent to being the change. Truth was you were tired of complaining about the world, so you decided to do something about it.

You'd been a St.Agnes's for four years now. After getting your masters in education, you decided that staying in new york was the best option. Though, once you got you're first job-- thats when DareDevil decided to start playing around.

Your parents tried getting you to go back home, but-- what good were you going to do in (y/h/t)? teach the kids you grew up with and that's it? no. Yo New York you went and stayed

You hadn't prayed until He came to the church after the explosion. though, you didn't know it was a he because nobody every dared to mention his gender.

how would it feel? being blind and having no idea where you were at. It was a terrible two in one deal not a lot of people could deal with, especially for a group of older nuns who were ached and never had a day off.

today you allowed the kids to take the day off, along with the nuns, so it would just be you helping this mystery blind person for a day so that the sisters could get a rest.

It was what? five am when you walked in.

As you opened the door, the squeak woke Matt up, and so did you're footsteps. Though, he didn't recognize your scentl or the way you're weight shifted on the floorboards. his fiery vision was practically eliminated, so all he saw was a blank sheet of paper.

Once your eyes laid on him, you noticed that he was shirtless and sweating. He hadn't shaved in weeks, and his beard was nearly an inch long.

Your heart began to race as you got closer and laid your eyes on his tensed muscles. Though, you fixated your train of thought on the fact that he was sweating and obviously confused.

"Hello?" asked Matt as you got closer.

"Hi, yes, sorry-- are you hot? you're sweating."

"...I'm aware." said Matt with annoyance, "you're not Maggie."

"No, I am not." you firmly responded as you placed the bowl of water on the night stand, "Sister Maggie is taking a fast today from serving. Since you care so much, I am pleased to tell you that she will be back tomorrow."

"Thank god." whispered Matt with a sigh, "she doesnt give me a break."

"A break? who says I'm going to give you a break" you asked as you dipped the porcelain towel into the bowl of water.

"Your not?"

"why would I?" you asked as you sat on the wooden chair by his bed.

"Blind guy, just sitting here, what would you do with me?"

"Make you recite your times tables."

"intriguing." responded Matt as his de-focused eyes attempted to find your voice,

"why do you say that?" asked Matt as he felt you place the warm cloth over his chest.

"I'm a teacher, It's my job."

"you're a teacher." said Matt

As you stopped for a second, placing the cloth back into the water you asked, "you're surprised?"

"no, not surprised, just stunned."

"Stunned is a synonym for surprised."

as she squeezed the blood out of the rag, you looked over to Matt who was enjoying the argument, "I'm not stunned, surprised or astonished. Just, you don't sound like a teacher."

"well," you said as you placed the warm cloth back on his chest, and began to run it up his neck, "when you have to teach twenty five blind sixteen-year-olds how to read braille-- you learn to pick up on the attitude."

"you're a blind teacher?" asked Matt.

"you're full of questions."

"well, you're the teacher, so I'd expect you to have the answers."

Matt heard the muscles in your cheeks stretch as you replied in a lower tone, "To answer, you're question, yes. I am a blind teacher."

"what do you do?" asked Matt as he felt you press down on an area of his neck where he had stitches, "just braille?"

"everything." you responded as you removed the cloth and placed it on the side of the night stand, "chemistry, history, math, reading, writing-- social skills. Sometimes they teach me."

"they do?" asked Matt as he heard you open the drawer that was under the nightstand.

"well, --"

"Matthew, Matthew Murdock."

"Well, Matthew, I've never been blind. So, everyday I do get reminded how it feels to be blind. Like, I'd never thought a guy would dump his girlfriend just because she couldn't look at him."

his lips pressed into a fine line as you took out a black long sleeve from his drawer, you said, "I also get taught how some people are happy they can't see. I get to know the pleasure of somebody saying that they are happy they never have to see the face of their algebra 2 teacher again."

"i agree with that one." responded Matt with a laugh, "so," asked Matt as he heard you unfold the long sleeve, "what have I taught you teach?"

nicknames already?

"that you're not so different then my students."

[zakariaxwolfe]

Zak rolled his eyes, "I know it wasn't D. But if you expected to drop this bomb and then be able to walk away again then I really don't know what's wrong with you. That's fucking cruel." How could he give her up a second time? Let her escape his hold and disappear again? Not when he spent every day missing her. She may not have done this to hurt him, but she was. After everything he had just been through he only felt more pain and confusion. Why did this all have to happen and why all at once? He felt like he was being overloaded and yet he still had so many problems left to deal with.

"This changes everything, Daniela!" He raised his voice just a little but remembered Soph was just in the other room and tried hard to reign it in. "You may not need any more fucking questions but I got a million running through my head. Mostly starting with what the actual fuck!" The pure shock was starting to subside and he was now getting flashed with all the other stages. "Oh, I don't know the fact that I nearly just died." It was a bit of a low blow but it hurt that she apparently wouldn't shed a tear, compared to the many that ran down his face for her.

"No." He said firmly shaking his head, "I am sorry you had to go through what you did, but we were never forced into this. Maybe before you came to us, but Mom and Pa never put that pressure on any of us and besides," he paused, "You didn't have to fake your fucking death to walk away! I would have helped you. Mom would have. I don't understand why you felt the need to do what you did, and I know that I probably never will. But that was just far D, it couldn't have been the only option to be free of this. The only thing I can really think of is that what you wanted and that hurts. Were we really that bad you could just dust your hands off us, your family, and walk away?" Maybe he needed to take a step back and process this all, but right now he was too angry, sad, and a million other things.

"And now you want me to keep this from her?" Zak ran his hands through his hair. What was even going on? "Don't put that blame on me. I'm not the one who let her believe you died. I was there through it all. I held her while she cried herself to sleep Daniela, I spend every single of your birthdays with her visiting your fucking grave. Do not put this burden on me." He didn't need the added stress but he sure in hell got it now. Even in his anger, he kept looking at her in disbelief. Like he still wasn't sure if she was a ghost or not. But his next words through him of kilter, "Jason knew?" There was no way his best friend would keep this from him. None. Jason saw firsthand the pain they went through when they lost her. He watched her move closer to the door, "Don't you dare walk out that door?" He might have been angry, but he still loved her. "Not before you get your ass over here and give your big brother a hug." Because that's when the tears finally slipped from his eyes and the crack in his voice bled his emotions. That's when he truly felt shattered.

Was it the publicity of the attack what had brought her here? Had it not been plastered all over the news, would she have come? Would the idea of another loss have dragged her from the depths if it was only something she'd heard through the hidden lines of communication she upheld with his world? His anger struck - and she did all she could beneath the weight of it. He had every right to the anger, to unleashing it upon her. The choices she'd made were selfish - she'd known that since the moment she'd made them, but the truth was that she'd felt as if she'd have no other choice. How much more loss and guilt - and anger would she have been forced to feel if she'd stayed? If she'd allowed her life to be shrouded by the darkened underworld of the city? She didn't move - didn't need to bite back against anything that might have risen in retort to his anger. Of all the things she'd taken from him - from their mother, she'd let him keep this. As he spilled the details that she'd not known, Daniela felt the roiling sickness pool in the pit of her stomach. So close - so close to death. Could he truly not see why she'd left? Now, starting right back at her - couldn't he see? This life - everything they risked, day in and day out. Daniela couldn't stomach it. Hues flicker between him and the hallway his daughter had disappeared down only moments before hand. A little girl; now forced to live with the trauma of this world. Even if she'd left, the cycle would never break. There would always be some innocence left to poison. Would little Sofia walk the path Daniela should have? Side by side with her brother - ruling the MC with an iron fist? Raging war with the factions of the underworld? Or would she too, turn from it? Too broken to handle it any longer? "I'm..--" Her apology, condolences, they'd mean nothing. There was no bringing them back, no erasing the trauma.

Hues narrow at his accusation. At the fact that he's not entirely wrong. Every move she made, was heavily lacquered in selfishness. Even now, as she stood here, she knew that there was nothing good that could come of her being here, not while she held the intention of disappearing again. "My coming here wasn't some well thought out ploy to manipulate and hurt you, Zak." She spoke with a sharpened tone, defiant and filled with conviction. "I didn't come here to cause more problems. Watching you would have raised more questions," undoubtedly, more eyes would be on him now than ever before - observing those around them with a scrutiny that wasn't there prior. They'd shut their ranks down - loyalty didn't mean trust, and the watching eyes of a pertinent stranger would have cause more trouble than even this was worth. At least in her eyes. "I don't need more questions. And this changes nothing." She repeated, more for herself than for him. If she could slip in an out, never to be thought of again, maybe she'd find a way to live with it.

"And what about what I cry for, Zak?" She shot back at him without further thought. Gone was her intention to let him be angry. "What about all the things that this life forced me to feel well before I was ever ready to? It doesn't matter whether there was never any pressure to be part of all of this - we were, whether we wanted to or not. Our entire life was this club. This was all I would have ever been if I'd stayed." She stepped back, towards the door she'd entered through. At least that hadn't changed - anger in one, meant the other felt it too. Even if they were never connected by blood - Zak would always feel like more of a brother than sometimes her own felt. "Tell her. Tell her I'm alive, and you're the one breaking her heart a second time." As if she hadn't felt the guilt in leaving, she didn't need it a second time. "You, Jason and... - Dylan are the only people who know for certain that I'm still alive. Nobody else needs to know, and that's your choice to make."

[fourfucksake]

i’m...sorry

pairing: chris evans x fem!reader

warnings: language, slight DV(?)

word count: 953

in a nutshell: admitting to Chris that you have cheated on him

I fucked up.

I knew I fucked up.

There were no words to describe how horrible I truly felt about my doings. One minute I am having the best time at a movie premier with a man I truly love and the next minute I am fucked into oblivion by a man I don’t even know. Well, kind of at least. I did know of him. I heard many amazing stories about his capabilities in bed. Rumours spread around extremely quickly in Hollywood and there is no denying in that.

Seven days. Seven whole days it has taken me to collect myself and tell Chris. He didn’t believe it at first. He didn’t believe it at second or third or fourth either.

He did believe it when I told him how the man did me. Where and for how long he did me. That is when he believed me.

I bit my lower lip, looking at Chris who was sat at a table. The silence between us was lasting too long. I couldn’t stand it.

‘Was it me, Y/N?’ He asked, finally looking up at me. I opened my mouth although no words flew out. All of sudden my ability to form sentences was gone and I couldn’t restore it for the life of me. ‘Please, tell me. Tell me what it was. I wanna know what was missing. Something must’ve been missing if you decided you want to get fucked by a different man. Now I wonder if you was faking every pathetic moan that those lips of yours let out whenever I was inside of you. I wanna know what the problem was, tell me, ’ He spat, I could tell he was getting angrier and angrier each second.

I was lacking an answer. Truly, I had no idea what to tell him. I was drunk and stupid, that was it. Was it a valuable excuse that should make him want to forgive me? No, absolutely not. I would’ve never forgiven myself if I was in his shoes. I knew I wouldn’t. My pride and my emotional damage from the past wouldn’t allow me to forgive him.

‘Tell me what it fucking was!’ He shouted; his voice sounded out in the whole room. Even Doger looked up, getting awaken from his nap. He always tried to defend me by growling at Chris whenever we had a disagreement. The poor creature was probably ready to do it right now even though I was the only person that was worthy of a loud bark.

‘No, it wasn’t you. I cannot explain what it was. All I can say is that I am sorry. I don’t know what else to tell you, I truly don’t.’ I shrugged my arms, was I looking careless? Probably, because Chris looked in a way that was unfamiliar with me, it was strange to me.

‘You’re just a fucking slut, you know that, right? You’re a piece of fucking shit,’ He spat, piercing a whole in my face. I didn’t want to defend myself; he was right.

‘Was it worth it? Huh?’ He raised his eyebrows, coming nearer my body. I didn’t move, I felt frozen. A part of me, a sickly confused part of me, wanted him to fuck me up. I deserved it. I needed him to beat me up, mess me up, whatever. I was worthy of that. ‘Fucking speak up!’ He shouted again., pushing me back. I managed to balance myself enough not to fall, swallowing a huge lump in my throat.

The dog jumped up from the coach, running towards us while loudly yapping at the man in front of him. We both looked at him. Chris with pity more than anything else.

‘Your mummy is a cunt, Dodger. Don’t defend her.’ He said with an evil laugh, shaking his head. Was it comical? Slightly, yes. He was upset and he knew the screams won’t help. Going back in time and changing what has happened between us was not an option.

He mumbled a few curse words as he walked around the house, collecting his wallet and car keys. It was late and he was angry, driving probably was not the best option right now. I should’ve said something but how would I even say that. I had no authority over him now.

If I could go back in time, I would’ve declined that date offer he gave me on a set couple of years ago. I didn’t deserve him. Right now, he has probably hated me more than anyone else in the world but overall, I have hated myself so much since my own creation that his intensified feelings could still never compete with my dysfunctional way of thinking.

I have done it again. I self-sabotaged myself. I have done it purposefully. The relationship was too good to be true, so I have managed to mess it up as I felt like this was what I deserve. To lose someone so beautiful should be a sin. I was definitely going to hell anyway, but this only made my portfolio richer in Satan’s eyes.

‘Take all your shit and get the fuck out of my house, you understand that? I want you gone by the time I’m back,’ He didn’t even look at me. He sounded firm and certain but his emotions where completely unclear to me. I didn’t even stop him. There was no point of doing so. Was I supposed to comfort him? I think he would have tried to kill me if I even touched him.

I watched him leave. He wasn’t only leaving the house that we once happily shared. He was leaving the life that we once happily shared.

[jazziergin]

Re @coffeeorderwrites

Hey all. I said I would post once Sal had her baby and had time to settle in a bit so this is that post. She's had a beautiful baby girl and had the following message for anyone interested.

Hi friends! It took a minute to get my brain together enough for a message and in the meantime Darren has quite stolen my thunder. I've also had a daughter with a colour as part of her name. At least it's a colour if you're French. Or just fancy. I think my little girl is possibly even more beautiful than their's though, just one mother's opinion 😜

Anyway. Why am I writing a message when I did the equivalent of mysteriously disappearing into the fog never to be seen again? Jas told me that several people got in touch with her about my deactivation and all the nice messages people left which is just so... touching and lovely and overwhelming in a good way. I'm really not used to people caring all that much about what I do and it's just wild to think I affected people in some way even in passing. I am full of love.

The other side of that though was realising that I'd left a certain level of confusion and upset behind and that is quite literally the last thing I want. The love I have for the people in this fandom is enormous and if you're thinking 'she doesn't mean me', I do. I mean you reading this right now.

I wanted to step away for several reasons but imma try and keep this short.

First. I knew even before my daughter was born she was going to need some extra care and attention and, while there are always options, my only option is to be there to help her live the best most amazing life. I dedicated a lot of love and time and energy to fandom and while the love is still there the time and energy is not and probably won't be for the foreseeable future.

Second. I do have a tendency to put my all into everything I do and that puts me on the fast train to burn out. I had so many unanswered asks and undone requests and unfinished wips and unfulfilled promised that I was just starting to feel buried by it. I haven't been unable to write properly for a while and even my ability to create was very impeded by the end.

I did a game that asked what My Thing was and someone said my Thing was not finishing what I start and. Yes they were just being needlessly unpleasant but they also weren't wrong? I feel like I just have nothing left to give to you all and Tumblr was starting to feel like a weight hanging on me rather than something fun to do. I knew that if I just tried to step away the temptation to look at what was happening would always be there. It just not being there any more sounded the best option for me personally and ultimately you gotta look after yourself first my loves, I hope you know that too.

I've left my fics in place because I know one of them was a source of comfort for people that I would never want to take away. I just don't want any more notifications about it I suppose. It seems dramatic in hindsight but to me this is what makes the most sense.

I said I would keep it short so those are the bare essentials. The reason I didn't say goodbye is because I just didn't want any fanfair. I used to joke about it a lot but I truly am allergic to attention. But I am really sorry to anyone that was hurt. My only regret is acting in a way that caused alarm or upset because I met so many special people in this fandom.

If you were my mutual I adore you, if we ever interacted even in tags that goes double. I have so much love for the people here and had a ton of fun with you all and I wish you all well. Hopefully this message can serve as the goodbye I should have given beforehand and if you ever think of me you think of me fondly.

So until we meet again, take it sleazy 💖💖💖

Tagging some people she mentioned may be interested, feel free to ignore though ( her words). Also one of them just said Cat Wife so let me know if you know who that is!

@hippohead @1908jmd @hopefulobjectmiracle @jedthesecretdreamer @backslashdelta @hummels-turn @make-it-klaine @itstruthtime @razzberryhairgel

[imagine-a-life-like-this]

Too Many Mistakes - Part 2 (S.CB)

Warnings : swearing, mentions of cheating, smoking

Word Count : 2008

Synopsis : a year after she left, she was face to face with him once again. in the past, she forgave him without him trying. but this time, he was going to prove to her that he could be the man she deserved.

Author’s Note : i wasn’t intending to write a part 2, but an anon requested it so I wrote it for them. i hope you enjoy this part 2! if anyone else has any requests, let me know. i’ll try my best!

He spent the next year alone, waking up in an empty bed made for two, her side completely untouched. Sitting at the table to eat, looking at the empty chair across from him wondering if she was eating wherever she was. Coming home to the place that no longer feels like home, not with her gone.

           He messed up time and time again, that he knew. She was always forgiving, loving him in a way he knows he never deserved. He no longer goes to the club, no longer entertains other women, and instead spends his days alone, holding onto a love he knows deserves better. But he wants to be better; for her. Anything for her.

           After traveling for a couple months, she returned to Seoul, moving into a new apartment, and getting her life back on track. She enrolled in university after finding her dream and got a delivery job that works around her school hours. After a year, things were finally falling back into place.

           Until they fell apart. She stood in front of the place she once called home, holding a bag filled with an order she knew all too well. It’s been a year, but he was still the same. He was still the only man she’s ever loved, but today he was just a customer. “Y/N.” Her name always sounded the best coming from him.

           “Delivery.” She handed him the brown paper bag. “Cash or card?” She already knew the answer, pulling out the portable debit machine and handing it over before he could even say a word. She took this time to study him. His hair was a mess, sticking up in random directions, and he had dark circles under his eyes. When the machine was back in her hands, she turned to leave, hoping he would let her go.

           “Can I talk to you?” But he didn’t. It’s been a year since he’s last seen her, and he wanted to take her in just a little longer. He doesn’t deserve anything from her, not even a minute of her time, but he was going to ask. And she gave it to him. As if one year hadn’t passed, as if he was still her boyfriend. She stood in front of him, waiting for another excuse like all the ones from the past. “I’m sorry for not loving you the way I should.” But they didn’t come.

           “What’s your excuse this time?” He didn’t say anything at first, not used to the bite of her words. He didn’t deserve her forgiveness, and sorry is nowhere near enough to fix the hurt he gave her, and he knew that. He knew a year was a long time, people change in shorter periods of time, but he couldn’t help but miss the girl she once was. So loving, so forgiving. But he knows he’s the reason she changed, he’s the reason her walls are built so high up.

           “I don’t have one, not this time. I’ve been kicking myself in the ass ever since you left. But I know I deserved to be left. You’re a diamond, but I treated you like dirt.” He took a step closer to her and her feet stayed planted on the ground. “And I just want you to know how sorry I am.”

           “I don’t forgive you.” He nodded but still took another step closer to her. “I forgave you too many times. You no longer deserve my forgiveness.”

           “Let me earn it.” Her eyes went wide at his words. “I never did anything in the past to earn your forgiveness. So let me earn it this time.” He was still the same Changbin that stole her heart all those years ago, but he was so different from the Changbin she left a year ago. She knows he doesn’t deserve this chance; he doesn’t deserve her. But he’s still the man that owns her heart. No matter how hard she tried to forget him, how hard she tried to move on, it still came down to him. She always came back to him.

           “I make no promises, but you can try.” A soft smile spread across his lips before he pulled her in for a hug. He still smelled like her Changbin, but he hugged her tighter. He held her as if she would disappear if he let go. “I have to get back to work, but my number is still the same.” She pushed him away, got into her car, and drove away.

           She didn’t expect him to reach out, to actually try and earn her forgiveness. But he did. He woke up earlier to deliver her favourite coffee from her favourite café every morning before her class. He spent his weekends with her, giving her the attention she had to beg for in the past. He tried his best to show her he was going to love her right this time; if he got the chance.

           “Are you free this weekend?” Jisung, a classmate and friend, asked as they exited the school. “I have a show on Saturday and I was hoping you’d come.” She could see the hope in his eyes and happily agreed.

           “Y/N!” Her and Jisung looked in the direction of the voice calling her name. Changbin pushed himself off his car and walked towards them. “Did you want to grab something to eat before your shift?” Jisung looked between the ex-couple, wondering who this man was, and why she never brought him up before.

           “Sure. I’ll see you tomorrow, Sungie.” She waved goodbye to her confused friend and followed Changbin to his car, getting in when he opened the door for her.

           She really didn’t want to fall in love again, especially with Changbin. But he makes it so hard when he looks at her like she’s the only girl in the world. And to Changbin, she is. She is the only girl he’s ever loved, the only girl he will ever love. He can’t believe he ever allowed another girl to take him away from the beautiful girl in front of him. No one has ever compared.

           “Where are you going?” Changbin asked as he stood in the living room of her apartment, watching her rush around to finish getting ready. They spend every weekend together, but now here she is getting ready to spend Saturday evening with another man.

           “I told you yesterday, Bin. Jisung has a show tonight and I promised I’d be there.” She grabbed her purse from the kitchen table before walking towards the door to put her shoes on. “You can come if you want.” He didn’t hesitate in following her out the door and to the club Jisung was performing at. A club Changbin recognized all too well. It’s been 14 months since he last stepped foot in this club.

           The place was crowded, more than he remembered, but she seemed to know exactly where to go. He wondered how many times she’s been here. If she always goes to Jisung’s shows. Is he the person that kept her company all these months? “You made it!” Jisung exclaimed when he saw her, throwing his arms around her.

           “Have I ever missed one of your shows, Sungie?” Changbin stood back a couple steps, watching the way the two interact. She doesn’t seem to hold back with Jisung, not the way she holds back with him. Her smile was wide and she seemed truly happy, happier than when she’s with him. “I hope you don’t mind, but I brought Changbin.” At the mention of his name, Changbin took the few steps forward and properly introduced himself.

           “Nice to meet you, Changbin.” He could immediately tell why the two of them got along. Within seconds, Changbin knew Jisung was a better option for her. Jisung would never make the mistakes he made.

           Jisung soon disappeared backstage to prepare. “I think you’ll really like him, Bin.” He smiled as he draped his arm across her shoulders, keeping her close to him. He fully expected her to push him away, but she moved closer to him, smiling softly back at him.

           “If you think I will, then I’m sure I will.” People were surrounding them, but his eyes were only on her. He only has eyes for her.

           “Oh my god! Binnie, is that you?!” Changbin turned when he heard his name over the loud chatter around him, his arm falling from her shoulders as he came face to face with a girl he barely recognized. “It is you!” She wrapped her arms around him, but he didn’t return the hug, instead pushing her off him. “Oh come on Binnie, it’s me!”

           “I’m sorry. I don’t remember you, and I’m here with someone.” He turned to introduce this strange girl to his true love, but she disappeared. Immediately, he started searching for her, frantically running through the crowds of people, desperate to explain that he truly only had eyes for her. He will only have eyes for her.

           After searching the whole club, he made his way outside, spotting the love of his life sharing a cigarette with a man he didn’t recognize. A man with a kind face and broad shoulders. As he got closer, he could see Jisung beside them, shaking his head at whatever she was saying. “Y/N.” Changbin softly called out, causing all three of them to look at him.

           “No.” Jisung said, taking a protective step in front of her, but she pushed herself forward, telling Jisung it was okay.

           “I wanted to believe you, Bin, but you haven’t changed. You’ll never change. I can’t forgive you, no matter how hard you try to earn it. So just walk away.” She turned back to Jisung and the other man, but Changbin wasn’t going to back down, he wasn’t going to lose her again.

           “No. I’m not going to walk away. Not this time, not any time.” When she faced him this time, he could see the tears that threatened to fall, but he refused to be the reason she cried, not this time. “I promise you I have no idea who that girl was. If you had waited just a couple more seconds, you would have seen me push her off and try to introduce her to you. Because I’m all about you. I made mistakes in the past, too many to count, but I will never make those mistakes again. Because I know what it’s like to be without you, and it’s fucking hell, Y/N.” His voice was getting louder and louder the more he spoke, but he had years to make up for. Years of sitting idly by while he watched her hurt. She always fixed everything even when it wasn’t hurt fault. Now it’s his turn. “I stopped going out after you left. I didn’t even try to move on because I knew no one could ever compare to you. It’s always been you, and I wish I realized that before I ruined everything. But I am not walking away. I am never going to stop trying to earn your forgiveness. Because I love you, and I fight for what I love.”

           “What if I can never forgive you?” She met his eyes as the tears began to fall. He cupped her face, wiping away the tears with his thumbs.

           “Then I’ll never stop trying to earn it. Because you’re worth it, Y/N.”

           “You really didn’t know her?”

           “Not a clue.” He whispered, wiping another tear as he blinked back his own. He sees now just how badly he broke her, but he will spend a lifetime putting her back together.

           “Kiss me.” She whispered. And he did. No hesitation. She knew there was still things they had to work on, things to talk about. He made a lot of mistakes in the past, and she forgave him too many times. She forgave him without him having to work for it, but not this time. This time, Changbin earned her forgiveness.

[angelguk]

→ pu$$y fairy — a jeongguk scenario

member: jeon jungkook

word count: 3.2k

genre: smut + college!au + jeongguk and oc are in a weird fwbs without the friendship part just the benefits except jaykay lowkey has feelings + virginity au

warnings: virgin!oc / blowjob / we talk about dicks for a bit / oc is strange / jaykay is confused / cum swallowing / first times / not really edited / mingyu the meddling best fwend

soundtrack: on the way, jhene aiko + hold on (slowed and reverb), the internet

Jeongguk doesn’t hate Mingyu. He truly doesn’t. He is one of his closest friends after all; he’d held him up after Jeongguk had dumped half a keg down his throat and his legs had promptly collapsed.  He’d also been a successful wingman for when Jeongguk was aiming to add Seolhyun to the list of girls he’d bagged, sent pictures of his organic chemistry notes when Jeongguk had missed more than half of the classes in high school and didn’t laugh at him when he was heart-broken over Sua and borderline depressed. He was a true friend; someone Jeongguk could rely on. It was a simple brother-like relationship that Jeongguk deeply treasured. So no, he could never hate Mingyu – but he could absolutely long to punch that insufferable asshole in the face.

He should have known this was going to go downhill exceptionally fast the moment you stumbled into his room, wide-eyed and nervous in your unsure steps. When his pants had hit the ground, the shock in your eyes was a dead giveaway to how messy this whole arrangement was going to be. The second clear sign was when you jumped out his window because the sight of his bare dick terrified you.

And this was all the result of Mingyu being a meddling shit who didn’t know when to mind his business.

He remembers it with a clarity that makes his shoulders tense, how Mingyu had snuck you into the conversation while twisting a soju bottle in his hands.

“Yo… JK…. You mind if I ask you a question?” He’d said. Jeongguk shrugged, focused on flipping the meat on the grill because he was starving and the prospect of cooked meat was a lot more appealing than feigning interest in a conversation. “Alright…," Mingyu took his silence as a cue to speak. “Have you ever fucked a virgin?”

He should have known then. He really should have known.

“I don’t know. I don’t ask any questions when I’m hard,” Jeongguk had replied, unknowing of the dangerous path this conversation was guiding him down.

“Yeah and most of the time you don’t fuck on an actual bed. I’m not even surprised you don’t ask questions.”

“Hey!” Jeongguk had swung the tongs around. “I ask important ones, like consent and making sure we’ve got a condom around. But virginity? Not my concern.”

“Seems a bit…. Whorish to me.”

“Not whorish. I just have my priorities elsewhere… Like cumming for example.”

Mingyu had sighed as he poured him a shot, the air leaving his lips heavy. “I shouldn’t even be asking you to be honest. You’re a decent guy but your kind of a dickhead when it comes to sex.”

“How does not pondering on virginity make me dickhead? Again, as I said, priorities are elsewhere.”

“Dude you’ve never even tried to have meaningful sex at least once in your life. When was the last time you were actually emotionally invested in the person you were sleeping with? Hmm?”

The answer was Sua and he knew that but Mingyu was decent enough to keep her name out of his mouth, the judging look in his eyes saying enough.

“You know… I don’t do well with the whole emotional thing. I prefer it physical. It’s less messy. But what does this even have to do with virginity?” Jeongguk hated to admit it but he was somewhat interested in where this conversation was going. If only he knew it was leading to a massive train wreck of the one thing, he steered clear from – emotions.

Mingyu had just sighed again, tipping the soju bottle into his shot glass once more. “There’s a girl who I’d like you to meet.”

He’d scoffed, mouth stuffed with a perilla leaf wrap. “You know I don’t do blind dates.”

“It’s not a blind date,” Mingyu had retorted, the glance he threw at his friend’s direction precarious. “She wants you to take her virginity.”

Jeongguk had choked. Of course, he had. Even if sex didn’t mean much to him, taking someone’s first time like that felt very transactional. And Jeongguk wasn’t that big of a dickhead. But then Mingyu had opened his mouth, spewing various details about your life to him that he would rather have not heard over a KBBQ lunch. You were a friend from one of his business lectures, rather eccentric but sweet and funny. You were also a virgin and terrified of approaching men on your own, one of the reasons Mingyu had sprung up this arrangement. Jeongguk wasn’t one to fall into things like this but it was too late. Mingyu was a marketing major for a reason, he knew how to spin words in his favour, convince people into agreeing to things that they normally would not. And that’s how Jeongguk found himself staring at your retreating figure after you’d thrown your body right out his window, landing hard on the lawn of the house he rented with Namjoon and Seokjin. The crazy thing was that you’d gotten up immediately, not showing any sign of a broken bone or injuries, before promptly sprinting down the road to the bus stop. He should have known then. He really should have known. And yet, here he is, pants discarded on the floor of his room and his dick aching from being unrelieved for longer than it’s ever been, while you crouch over him, squinting at his penis like it’s a foreign object that could kill you.

“Could you please stop staring at my penis like that.” He says it out of frustration, but also the way you’re examining his length makes him feel self-conscious in a way he hasn’t felt like in a long time.

“Sorry,” you murmur, not breaking eye contact with his dick. “I’m just… fascinated. It’s rather….” The sentence tapers out and you swallow hard as if it pains you to admit it, “...Ugly.”

Jeongguk decides then and there he hates you.

“I mean... It’s not that it’s ugly!” you swiftly attempt to amend, catching the glare he directs at you. “It’s also big!”

“I know. And you just said it was ugly,” Jeongguk retorts, weighing the options in his head. Either get a poor blowjob from a girl he’s terrified of (but also bizarrely attracted too) or kick you out of his room and finish himself off. The situation sucks either way but it’s better than the last time when you’d leapt out of the window like a gazelle.

“I misspoke,” you say, gently falling onto your knees. You flash him a shy smile, a soft delicate little thing that makes your eyes glitter and Jeongguk instantly picks the first option. “It’s just different to what I expected it to look like.”

He scoffs, swallowing hard on the sudden lump in his throat. “There’s no way you haven’t seen a dick before. You don’t watch porn?”

The grimace you make is enough of an answer. “I have… Not all the time though, it’s too much for me sometimes. Also, it’s weird seeing it in real life and not, like, through a screen.”

“Noted. But still, it’s not that ugly,” Jeongguk murmurs, trying not to compare his penis to the visuals he has in his head. His pride is wounded from that comment he won’t deny it.

“It kinda is,” you reply. Jeongguk flicks your forehead in retaliation. “Ow! Why’d you do that.” There’s that stupid pout in your lips as you glower at him. He despises how his dick twitches at the sudden thought of your pretty mouth wrapped around his length. Despises it even more when you gasp at the slight motion trembling through him. “It moves?!”

“Yeah,” Jeongguk sighs, wondering how on Earth you’re over the age of twenty and still like this. “It does. Also, don’t insult my dick. It’s rude.”

“Sorry again,” you pause as if you’re considering whether what you might utter next is offensive. You open your mouth anyway, unable to comprehend the fact that your words are slowly chipping away at his ego. “It’s kinda scary that it moves.”

“Oh my god, you are the literal worst.” Jeongguk thinks his boner might evaporate. It’s a miracle it’s lasted this long. You’d sauntered into his room around half an hour again and he’d been hard from the get-go. Truly amazing his balls hadn’t shrivelled up yet. “You know you’re about to blow me off right?”

“I know… I’m stupid,” you counter, eyebrows furrowing together like you’re attempting to figure out exactly how Jeongguk’s dick works. It’d be very simple if you just asked him. It’s essentially an up and down motion, some swirls, a lot of wetness. Nothing too difficult. But when you glance up at him, the innocent glaze over your eyes almost hopeless, he can tell it feels the same as defusing a bomb. “I just… Don’t know what to do. Show me?”

And there it is - the foolish little thing that landed Jeongguk here half-naked on the edge of his bed in the first place. Even though you were mildly repulsed by the male autonomy you were still so eager to learn. Something Jeongguk didn’t know he would be into until you posed that question and his balls tightened in a way they have never done before.

“Okay,” he mumbles, hoping you don’t suspect the twitch that runs through his length when you say that. Not like you would, to be fair.

But then you sweep your hair back, lean in fast, no preparation or anything before your breath is brushing against his crotch and Jeongguk nearly screams.

“Woah, woah, woah! I thought you just asked me to show you? What are you doing?” Maybe he scuttles further down the bed, terrified of the rush of heat you send straight to his gut.  

Your eyes flicker upward, bright and ingenuous. “Am I doing it wrong?”

“You’re not -,” Jeongguk sighs breath weighing through the air. “You’re not doing it wrong. I just think... We should go slow right? It’s your first time? Maybe don’t rush into it?”

“I watched a YouTube video and they said to do it like that,” you reply. Jeongguk can’t help but blink at you, brain reeling from attempting to understand your being.

“You watched a - never mind. You’re giving me a headache. And I thought you knew nothing. Porn would have been a better research alternative but to each their own.”

“I did it for preparation! I didn't know it’d be this nerve-wracking in real life. And, I told you, real dicks are gross. She used a dildo.”

“How is a dildo any different to a real dick?” Jeongguk fingers dig into the mattress a little harder when you lean it once more, gingerly resting your head against his knee.

“It’s just different. Less grotesque. And they come in various colours.”

He might just actually scream. “It’s literally made to replicate a penis.”

You sigh, your breath skipping against his skin. The room is suddenly tight, closing in on him and you’re not even really touching him. And then you catch your lip between your teeth, pressing down with a quick thoughtful bite. “I think you’re deflecting right now.”

“I’m not,” he splutters. “Why would I even be deflecting right now?”

“I mean, we’re having a conversation about dildos when your dick is hard and I’m meant to be blowing you. Sounds like deflection doesn’t it?” He hates the way your eyes glitter, bright and captivating as your gaze locks into his.

“Like I said,” Jeongguk retorts, “We should take it slow.”

“Okay then. I’m done talking about dildos unless you have anything else to add?”

“I don’t,” he murmurs, “Okay then, onto giving a blowjob.”

“Onto giving a blowjob,” you reiterate. And then, like a psychopath, you smile. “Where should I start?”

He hates that body is on edge right now, hands trembling even though he hides them by squeezing his bed-sheets tight. “Try giving it a lick first? You can put your hand around the base too - if you want to.”

“Here?” His knees nearly buckle when you wrap your warm palm around his length, grip firm around the base of his cock. But that’s nothing to the gentle lap of your tongue against the side of his cock, a quick little thing and nearly launches him off the bed.

“Oh - uh - yeah, there.” His voice sounds far off and without warning your mouth is against him once more, tongue a sinful little thing that slips along his length, wet and warm and so sneaky he’s unsure of what to respond with apart from an instinctual buck of his hips. It’s easy like this, your tongue pressed against his cock and your hands slowly dragging upwards, placing a perfect pressure along his length that leaves him sighing into the air of his bedroom. Your movements grow more direct, reading the increasing desperation in Jeongguk’s body as he moves closer and closer to you, waiting until you feel sure enough. And then, finally, your mouth sinks onto him.

He nearly whimpers. Nearly. There’s a heat pooling in his gut and ebbs through every muscle and nerve, the coil of his desire springing tighter with each inch that slips down your throat. You take him so well, Jeongguk can’t help but watch in awe, the wideness in your eyes making him harder than he’s ever been in his life. Even with your inexperience, the way you swallow his cock is obscene. It’s an imagery Jeongguk engraves in his memory, purposefully stored because he knows he’ll think about it whenever his desires override his logical thoughts again. You lap him up like you want this, a soft moan echoing from your throat and along his length as you move deeper, mouth plaint to his dick. He forces himself to sit still, give you the time to adjust, lick and taste to your leisure, forcing the impending wave of heat back down into his gut. He holds it there even when you move away, the sound of your wet mouth popping off his dick permeating the air.

And of course, you lick your lips afterwards, a swift swipe of your pink tongue against them, your eyes trained on his.

“Like that?” you ask.

Jeongguk’s going to die. He is. And you’ll be the reason why listed on his death certificate.

“Yeah,” he murmurs, chest tight with want. “Like that.”

You lean back in without question, mouth taking his length like you were made for it and your hand works against the parts of him you can’t reach just yet. His mind wanders as his eyes take in this sight of you, on your knees and mouth open wide just for him. Someday he’d like to see if you could truly take his length, all of it. Down your throat. Hard and fast like his hips wanted to go. But this is more than perfect. How you concentrate on blowing him like you want to see him spill himself down your throat. It’s almost adorable, the earnestness in your gaze every time your eyes flicker upwards as your mouth moves along his cock. He likes this more than he’s willing to admit, the slowness in your pace, how your tongue is shy sometimes when it laves against his tip. It’s a change from what he usually gets - and a welcome one too. A tiny part of him feels like it would be fitting to hold your hand. You’re so pretty too, especially when your lips are on him. He’d like to take care of you, see what your face looked like when his tongue was deep inside of you, know what your taste like as you moan out his name. He doesn’t even register the words as they leave his mouth, head lost in the images colouring his thoughts.

“Taking me so well, baby,” he can’t help the grunt, the pet name natural to him, “So pretty with my cock in your mouth.”

And you hum like you like it - like you like pleasing him, sinking further down until his tip bumps against the back of your throat. The zip down his spine nearly sends him spiralling.

“Baby,” he feels it then, when your eyes shift to meet his, the snap in his gut. “F-fuck, I’m gonna cum. You need to stop right now if you don’t want to down your throat.”

But you don’t, moving faster like the twitch of his dick in your mouth spurs him on, your lips firm as they wrap around him. He doesn’t hold in his moves this time, hips gently moving up to meet your mouth, the tremor running through his bulky thighs nothing but a warning before it hits him hard. A wave of heat, melting through his muscles as his eyes flutter shut, your tongue lapping him right up, no protest as he unravels down your throat. It’s over in an instant but Jeongguk feels like mush, head floating and his bones soft with how hard his back hits the mattress. You pull off his length a second later, letting him feel you swallow all of him first.

“Holy shit.” His mouth is still disconnected from his brain.

There’s a beat of silence, so awkward that Jeongguk shuffles himself back onto his elbows even though his bones feel like giving way. And then your laugh tinkles through the air, a soft gentle thing that makes his heart seize in his chest.

“That… wasn’t so bad,” you say, staring at him with an ease that spikes an urge to press his lips against yours in his heart.

“Oh,” he replies, like an idiot. “You liked it?”

“Well, it didn’t suck… pun intended. Your moans are really loud.”

Jeongguk blushes - he blushes - even after the stupid joke you made.

“Um, yeah. I do, I guess. Sorry, I kind of forgot to show you what to do. But you’re a bit of a natural, to be honest.” He abhors the diffidence in his voice.

“I guessed that,” you retort, the smile on your face hypnotic, “From your really loud moaning.”

“Can you - fuck how do you ruin any intimate moment when it happens?”

“Guess I’m a natural at that too,” you say it with a laugh, and Jeongguk can’t help the smile that tugs against his lips.

“Um,” he tries, fully aware of the front view seat you were getting of his soft dick. He sits up to try and shield it, feeling awfully exposed. “If you’d like… I could return the favour?”

“No, I’m good.” There’s zero hesitation in your voice and you’re up before Jeongguk can think of a decent excuse to keep you in his room. “Maybe another time? I’ll text you. Bye Jeongguk.”

It’s then he regrets not encouraging you to undress earlier, his assumption that this would be the worst blowjob of his life incredibly incorrect. Perhaps if your clothes were scattered around his bedroom he could have found a way to convince you into his sheets while you searched for them. But you’re fully dressed, already bounding out of his door like his dick wasn’t down your throat moments ago. He watches you go with forlornness, mouth dry with words he’s incapable of expressing at this very instance and his heart oddly warm at the sight of your skipping away with a carefreeness he admires. He still hates that you’re leaving, perhaps the only positive of this situation is that you’re using his bedroom door instead of his window.

“Bye,” Jeongguk mumbles into the vacant air. You don’t even catch it, shooting him a quick grin before you’re bounding down the stairs as if this doesn’t even matter to you. A stumble on a stepping stone to something greater. He plucks up his phone, pants still lost somewhere on the floor. Blocking Mingyu for twenty-four hours should be enough of a punishment, right?

mingyu the man [10:21pm]

bro..

you alive?

jaykay [10:26pm]

i focking hate u

u know that right?

mingyu the man [10:31pm]

you dont my g

how was it?

did she jump out the window this time?

jaykay [10:34pm]

worse

mingyu the man [10:37pm]

bro wtf wot she do??

jaykay [10:40pm]

she actually gave me head

mingyu the man [10:45pm]

????

how is that worse dude you’re just as weird as her

jaykay [10:46pm]

ITS WORSE CAUSE I LIKED IT

mingyu the man [10:51pm]

damn....

you like crazy coochie don’t you

jaykay [10:52pm]

WHAT R U EVEN

MAN FUCK

I HATE U

mingyu the man [10:53pm]

lmao u don’t i brought her into your life u lurve me

im best man for the wedding

not jaehyun

u got dat right

jaykay [10:56pm]

i hope you fall into a ditch and die

mingyu the man [10:58pm]

okay big man

you gon see her again tho?

jaykay [10:59pm]

....maybe

idk man im fucked up right now

like???

SHE JUMPED OUT THE WINDOW??

mingyu the man [11:01pm]

and u still invited her over to suck your dick again

crazy coochie got u bad bruh

jaykay [11:06pm]

FUCK U

mingyu the man [11:11pm]

mhmm if thats what u say

i have a class wid her to tomorrow

any messages u want to pass on?

hello?

[mingyu the man is blocked]

hello? jaykayyyyyy

JAYKAY

SEAGULL

damn he got it bad

[justcourttee]

New idea!!! Could you write a story where Mari and Tim are full-blooded siblings except Mari was taken away from the Drakes. Mari would be Dick's age in this. The Drake's finally pass away so Bruce goes to adopt Tim but he's having trouble because Marinette is doing the same. It's a custody battle. Tim is confused because he doesn't know Mari (she was taken away before she was born and CPS wasn't dealing with that family again) but Mari knows about him. Maybe Dick/Mari?

I have a feeling I took this in a different direction than you meant for it to be, but I hope you still like it :) @elements1999

Tim’s Decision

There were two things that Timothy Jackson Drake was sure of.

One, that he had never seen Dick so flustered before in his life. The poor guy was tripping over his own feet, stumbling into the court hallway as if he had been drinking all morning, his face resembling something close to the apple Bruce forced him to eat for breakfast.

And the second, well, he was sure he had never met someone as persistently, annoyingly, upbeat as Dick Grayson until seconds ago when she reached out her hand to introduce herself.

“Marinette Dupain-Cheng. I’m sorry we have to meet under these circumstances, Timothy. This isn’t my first time reaching out, but it certainly is my first time getting through. Maybe after this, we can grab a bite to eat, get to know each other?”

Tim slightly withdrew his hand, reaching out to steady a swaying Dick. He wanted to ask him what could’ve warranted this behavior from him, but he wasn’t sure he was prepared to hear the answer.

“Miss Dupain-Cheng-”

“Please, call me Marinette! I’m not married, nor am I a middle-aged woman. I’m only 21 after all. You’re 14, right Timothy?”

“If I call you by your name, call me Tim. Timothy sounds like a rich brat.”

Marinette’s giggle earned a small smile from the boy. He had no idea who she was, but her presence was soothing and he didn’t feel any immediate danger. Besides, she wasn’t the first person to approach him in the past week. News of his parent’s death traveled very quickly and many people attempted to adopt him in hopes that his fortune would be theirs.

Bruce was quick to wave them off, offering to adopt Tim himself, but before Tim could even think about accepting, CPS contacted Bruce with the proposal from one Marinette Dupain-Cheng.

“I hadn’t realized that Bruce Wayne had caught your attention. I really want to make sure that you are able to have a regular childhood or at least some resemblance of a few normal years. If you think Bruce is a better option for you, I promise I’ll pull out right now, but if you have any doubts at all, I want to let you know that I want to fight for you, Tim.”

“I haven’t made any decisions yet and considering Bruce let me meet with you, I have to assume you’re not after my parent’s fortune.”

Marinette’s smile tightened at the mention of the fortune or was it his parents? He couldn’t tell. She was definitely holding something back, but they had just met and he wasn’t in any position to be pressuring her for some answers. What he was in the position to do was knock some sense into a now drooling Dick Grayson.

“Knock it off will you, you’re heavy and gross. You’re making a fool of the Wayne name and aren’t you supposed to be my guardian today?”

Dick muttered out something that sounded like an okay, but if Tim was honest, he wasn’t sure it was anything more than a few syllables to lower his guard.

“This is what Bruce considers a capable guardian? I’m not sure I trust him as far as I could throw him. What can it do?”

Marinette reached forward, poking Dick’s cheek, enough force to snap him out of whatever daze he had been in the past hour.

“Dick Grayson-Wayne ma’am, a pleasure to meet you.” Instantly he bowed, his hand extended as if he were waiting for something that wouldn’t come.

“Mhmm, so you are Bruce’s ward? You look like you could be his blood child. Does he have a thing for dark hair and light eyes? Creepy.”

Dick’s hand clutched his chest as if he had been struck directly in his core. Marinette turned her attention from him and back to where Tim stood.

“Anyways, I believe we mentioned lunch earlier. I’ve already submitted my application to CPS and after this formal meeting, you’re free to meet up with me whenever you would like as long as a third party comes with us. Can you think of anyone you want to come with us?”

Tim glanced to the side where he could feel Dick’s puppy eyes boring into him. He wouldn’t be his first choice but if it came down to him of Jaime, he was pretty sure he had a better chance of reigning in Dick.

“Do you mind if Dick comes with us?”

Marinette’s smile was shaken with uncertainty as if she was thinking of protesting but didn’t want to overstep any boundaries. Tim felt terrible putting her in the position but he was sure that Dick was her best chance given his options. “Of course not, where would you like to go?”

The lunch moved smoothly with Tim learning so much about her. She was originally from the Gotham foster system herself, but a young couple who couldn’t have kids adopted her at a younger age, moving her to Paris with them. She attended the equivalent of middle and high school over there where she met many lifelong friends. Starting late in her middle school years, she upstarted a fashion business where she had several big-name clients months into her start-up. Now she made personal designs, but many were taken care of by her team. She only stitched a very few commissions for close personal friends.

She was remarkable, someone who truly started from nothing. His parents did something similar as did Bruce’s. It was something he wanted for himself, something he wasn’t sure he could ever achieve with either his or Bruce’s fortune.

The custody battle was put on hold at Tim’s request. He was really intrigued by Marinette and Bruce pressuring him to take his time and really think over his choices finally led him to that decision. However, no matter how much Bruce tried to be a neutral party in the matter, Tim could feel the strain it put on their work relationship.

The more he saw Marinette, the more mess-ups occurred on patrol. Bruce would constantly tread into Tim’s area, always dropping in on his battles. It was as if he lost all trust in Tim as if he was trying to rely less on him, trying to go back to doing things on his own.

It was so frustrating. No matter how many times he told Bruce that he could still be Robin no matter who he chose, it seemed to mean nothing to him. He continually waved him off, claiming to have no idea what he was talking about.

A month after he met Marinette, Tim snuck out for the first time, begging her to meet him at a coffee shop near her hotel.

“Tim, this is dangerous. If CPS finds out we meet behind Bruce’s back, it could nullify my application.”

“I know, I know.” His head dropped to the table, buried in his arms trying to suffocate his frustration. “I just needed to get away from all of them. I think the fact that I consider you a serious option really upsets Bruce. It’s not that I don’t consider him a serious option as well, it’s just-he’s just-”

Tim let out a sigh, slowly sitting back up unsure where his thoughts were taking him.

“Tim,” Marinette reached across the table, laying her hand on his arm. “if this is too stressful for you, I can pull out of this.”

Her touch was so gentle, so soothing. It felt like the mother he never had, the kind of mother he yearned for but never realized. He really didn’t want her to leave his life just because he couldn’t give up being Robin.

“I just feel so selfish,” his vision started to blur, Marinette’s figure coming in and out of focus. “I want to keep the life I’ve made for myself here, but I also don’t feel like I can grow the way I want to under Bruce’s supervision.”

Marinette didn’t say anything for a moment, she just allowed him to cry, her thumb moving in small circles on his arm. Tim reveled in the feeling, reveled in the silence. He hadn’t had this in a while, he hadn’t had comfort for as long as he could remember. Even at his parent’s funeral, people just commented on how strong he was and how smart he was and told him he would be just fine. Not once did anyone try to hug him or ask if he was okay. They just assumed.

Everyone always just assumed.

“Tim, I haven’t been 100% honest with you since I met you. I didn’t want it to mess with your decision, but I think it’s time you knew.”

“I already know.” Tim moved his arms from her touch, his heart throbbing from the loss of touch. “I did my research on you, especially considering how Bruce let me meet you so quickly. You’ve done a lot of work to bury it, but the Will mentioned you, or at least your old name.”

Marinette’s smile was tight, her eyes as watery as his.

“Is that what’s holding you back from making the decision you want to make?”

Tim wanted to deny that he had no clear choice, but that was a lie he had been feeding himself. He wanted to stay with Bruce, in Gotham. His life was here, his friends were here, his passions were here. The only thing that wasn’t, was her.

“I want Bruce to be my official guardian. I want to be Tim Drake-Wayne.” Marinette nodded, understanding pouring from her and crashing into him. He felt like all the stress from the past month had been pushed out and replaced with relief. “But I really did want to get to know you, I didn’t want to make a decision because you would be out of my life for good. I’ve already lost you once, CPS took you didn’t they?”

“Right before mom became pregnant with you. I’m sure it happened to you too, but I was only six. They left me alone, not even a butler or maid to watch after me. They tried to argue with CPS that I was a competent child who could handle groceries and looking after myself but they didn’t buy it. My existence hadn’t even been released to the public so they didn’t take it too hard, losing me that is. But you, they immediately brought you into the limelight, almost like a challenge to CPS, I’m assuming that’s why they didn’t get involved for you no matter how many times my parent’s called and reported them.”

Tim couldn’t help the chuckle that bubbled out. It seemed to have shocked Marinette too as she gave way to her own giggle threatening to spill.

“Marinette, can I ask you something selfish?”

“Of course, mon frère.” Her hand reached back across the table, gripping his tightly as if pressing him to ask the question he dreaded most.

“Will you still be apart of my life? I’m not asking you to move to Gotham, but maybe a monthly trip? A weekly dinner? Something? I just don’t want to lose you again.”

The tears that had been pooling in her eyes finally slipped free, her smile blinding.

“I wouldn’t have it any other way.”

. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

“Bruce, Marinette is coming over for game night tonight!”

“Marinette?” Dick’s head popped around the corner, the red plastered by the mere mention of her name. It sickened Tim. “But I have patrol tonight! Bruce can’t the police do their jobs for one night!”

Bruce chuckled as he set up the table, a stack of every board game imaginable piled in the middle.

“I suppose you can push it back from 11 to 5 to 2 to 5. After all, I’m not heartless.”

Tim let out an involuntary groan as he slipped into the couch, wishing it would swallow him whole.

“Whose side are you on here Bruce? She’s already your honorable daughter. Do you really need her to be part of your legal family that bad?”

“I haven’t the slightest clue what you mean.” His smirk only made Tim want to fold in on himself even more.

“Bruce, if you’re gonna set me up, can it at least be with Tim’s more attractive siblings? Like what about that Jason guy? Or Barbara Gordan?” Tim popped up in his seat, a smile beaming from ear to ear.

“Marinette’s here!” He waved her over to the seat beside him before a certain older lovebird could intervene.

“I am attractive! Why won’t you accept me Marinette?” Dick wiped away fake tears as he fell dramatically to the floor by her feet.

Tim could feel his heart overflowing for the first time in years. His life felt so fulfilled, like all of the missing pieces finally found a place. As the night continued on, only one thought stayed prominent in his mind.

He couldn’t be happier with his decision.

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[mypalbuck]

HE LOVES ME, HE LOVES ME NOT. 

↳ In which sometimes loving people from afar has dire consequences. (hanahaki au)

pairing: bucky barnes x fem!reader

warnings: angst, slight panic attack, mentions of coughing petals and trouble breathing. 

word count: 3k 

You and Bucky have been friends since you were little. He was your special person and you were his. Your friends always used to joke that the two of you would end up getting married considering how joint at the hip you were, and for a while you truly believed it. No matter what life had thrown at you, your paths always seemed to cross. You were his special person and he was yours, until one day she came into his life.

She was radiant.

The kind of girl you always aspired to be like, long beautiful hair, a smile that could outshine the sun and the worst trait of all... a genuinely nice person. You think it was this quality that made you hate her the most, she was perfect for Bucky and you couldn’t deny it one bit. That's why you shut your mouth and held back your tears when Bucky came to you one day and handed you an envelope.

You are invited to the wedding of Bucky Barnes and…

Your first instinct was to pinch yourself which earned you a strange look from Bucky. Your second instinct was the laugh, how ironic. Your third instinct was to cry, to beg him not to get married. The fourth was the sudden urge to cough, strange but you would soon realise that you would suffer greatly from a love lost. As you looked back up at Bucky who was eagerly waiting for your approval, you decided it was best to smile as genuinely as you could and congratulate him on getting someone as perfect as her to be his wife. Little did Bucky know that you went home that night and began to cough up the petals of a striped carnation.

The day had finally arrived, from today onwards Bucky would officially be yours no longer. You could no longer call him anymore in the middle of the night when you felt anxious and needed someone with you to lull you to sleep. You could no longer ask him to be your date to Tony’s parties where all your colleagues would showcase their happy relationships. You could no longer be even the tiniest bit selfish and just want to be around him. He no longer needed you, so you had to learn to no longer need him.

You decided to quickly grab some more concealer to cover up your puffy eyes, from your room at the Avenger’s Facility or Home as you like to call it. The previous night Wanda and Natasha decided to rent a hotel room for you all to have a girl’s night, a fun night to try and calm your nerves and prepare yourself physically and mentally for the day you would never be ready for. It helped for a bit you had to give it to your best friends, but once the two drifted to sleep, the overwhelming sadness crept back up to you and you spent another lonely night coughing. 

Grabbing the handle you swung your bedroom door open only to hear movement already coming from your room. “Nat, did you find the shoes? I think they were in the shoebox up the top…” looking up you expected to see your red-haired friend, but instead met the eyes of the one person you didn’t want to see right now.

“Hey…” Bucky spoke sheepishly having been caught getting dressed in a room that isn’t his. You tried to hold your tears back, your chest began to tighten. The fates have such sick and twisted humour. Out of all the rooms he could have chosen to get dressed in, it had to be yours. The room where you two would have secret movie nights. The room that served as Bucky’s oasis when he first moved in with the Avengers, the only room he felt comfortable enough to sleep in because you were there to hold him when he had a nightmare. The room which you would cry yourself to sleep in every night after the blip happened, hoping and praying that one day Bucky would come home to you and he did.

But you waited too long, double guessing if he liked you or not instead of just ripping the bandaid off and confessing. 

“Sorry for taking over your room, Doll. I just needed some space from everyone to think.” the nickname sending shivers down your spine, in response you nodded your head and waved your hand afraid of what might come out of your mouth if you spoke. Quickly you moved to your bed and took a seat, your eyes hungrily trying to take a mental note of every little feature of Bucky’s you had grown to love, as after today there would be no more longing gazes. A cough left your mouth as he reached over to put his suit jacket on, of course you always thought he was attractive but there was just something about him today that left you speechless.

Bucky caught you staring at him from the mirror and moved to sit next to you “Y/N, you’re here.” he spoke almost breathlessly, which confused you slightly. “Of course I'm here, I couldn’t miss my best friend’s wedding.” That was the first lie of the day. You had been pondering all night as to whether or not you went, but you know that by not going Bucky would have a lot of questions.

“Still can’t tie a tie?” you laughed softly, moving over to help the man out. After a moment of silence you decided to distract yourself from the close proximity that you sat to him. “Are you nervous?” Bucky let out a shaky laugh at this as you finished his tie and took a step back.”It’s totally normal to be nervous you know, Buck. You’re getting married!” moving back to your previous spot, you let him keep getting ready as you watched him begin to pace.

“Am I making the right decision, Y/N?” eyes wide, tears begin to brim your eyes as you prepare yourself for the second lie of the day. “Yes, Bucky. You’re making the right decision.” Suddenly the bed dipped next to you and Bucky’s head was on your shoulder, face burrowed into your neck. An action Bucky had grown fond of over time, slowly you began to stroke his hair, trying to calm him down as you felt him starting to panic. His head quickly shot off your shoulder as he turned his body to face you. “I don’t think I can marry her. I-I love you, Doll!”  

“W-what?!” you yelped, quickly standing up and beginning to pace around your bedroom, breathing becoming ragged as you could feel more petals coming up your throat. You moved back over to Bucky and whacked the back of his head. “WHAT THE HECK Y/N?” he rubbed the back of his head which had begun to throb. You turned around fuming and pointed angrily at him “WHAT THE HECK? BUCKY, YOU’RE ABOUT TO GET MARRIED!” breaths starting to become short you rushed out of your room and into the bathroom, locking the door. Luckily you had made it into the bathroom coughing into the sink before Bucky could see the petals. “Y/N, let me in…” Bucky spoke from the other side of the door as rinse your mouth under the tap.

“Y/N… You know I can just break the door down.” Bucky spoke softly, you could hear him moving to sit with his back against the other side of the door. “Jarvis, make sure Bucky doesn’t get into this bathroom” You spoke shakily to the AI. “I’m sorry Miss L/N, but protocol will not allow me to do so unless the facility is under attack. “Dammit” you spoke, moving to sit against the door in case Bucky tried to pick the lock. “Do you really love me Bucky?” you spoke wearily, trying not to get your hopes up. You knew it was just his nerves talking but a small part of you was hopeful that he really did return the intense feelings you had for him, it would solve a lot of problems for you. A soft chuckle could be heard before Bucky replied “Why are you questioning it? We’ve been friends since we were kids. You stuck by me even after Hydra turned me into a monster, instead of running you stayed. You always stay. For that I will always love you.” You let out a bitter laugh at this “I’ve seen love in different forms, Bucky. What you feel towards me is familiar love, I’m the safe option…” more tears left your eyes as you began to grasp what was happening.

You sat in the bathroom in silence for a few minutes, silent tears falling as you tried to muffle your sobs. “Do you love me?” Bucky spoke breaking the silence, his voice evidently sad. Here came the third lie you would tell today “I loved you. Loved, past tense.” you only hoped that he wouldn’t pick up on you lying through your teeth, but you knew better than that.

“Maybe if you looked me in the eyes when you said that, I’d actually believe you.” hurt evident in his voice. Moving towards the door, you learnt your ear against it. Bucky at this point had moved away from the door which was your cue to quickly leave the bathroom. Slowly you move your hand towards the handle and open it, but before you could escape Bucky had pulled you into a tight hug which you couldn’t break free of. “B-Bucky, let me go.” you pleaded, trying to push at his chest to separate the two of you. “Do you love me, Y/N?” Bucky asked again, this time he loosened his grip to look at you. 

Mustering as much courage as you could, you look at him with a serious expression “I loved you. Loved, past tense.” the fourth lie of the day. A single tear slipped down Bucky’s cheek. Sighing deeply, you pull one of the flowers you had neatly placed in your hair and pinned it to his jacket pocket. “Good luck, I’ll see you out there.” smiling weakly you move out the door. Looking over your shoulder, you watch as Bucky inspects the flower. 

A striped carnation.

I’m sorry I can’t be with you, I wish I could. This is what a striped carnation symbolises, the regret that a love cannot be shared.

Quickly walking out of the bathroom and down the hallway, you take a moment to support yourself against the wall, “I do love you, Bucky. So damn much.”

“Y/N! There you are!” a voice spoke from down the hall as the figure rushed towards you. Quickly wiping your eyes, you came face to face with Steve, your other best friend. Noticing your tears, he spoke knowingly “He told you didn’t he?” with the single nod of your head, he pulled you into a tight hug. “I love him, Steve.” you begin to sob into his chest as he pulls you down the hallway to somewhere more private, which ended up being his car. “So he told you, huh…” Steve spoke, before running a hand through his hair and sighing. “You told him you loved him back right?” Steve asked as if it was the most obvious thing in the world. Shaking your head no you begin to cry more, prompting Steve to take his handkerchief out of his jacket pocket and hand it to you. “No. Just- just please get me out of here.” nodding his head, Steve put his seatbelt on. 

“Y/N!” The front door slammed open as Bucky yelled after you. “Steve, please start the car.” Steve looked between you and Bucky before sighing sadly and starting the car. You slump back into the seat, eyes flickering over to the side mirror of the car, heart shattering as you spot Bucky standing in the driveway, shoulders slumped and eyes staring longingly in your direction.

“I can turn the car around...” Steve spoke softly. You open your mouth about to cave in but were cut off by the buzzing of my phone. 

Sarge 💘

I have so much I need to say, please, please come back.

More tears ran down your face as you read the pleading message. “Why’d you do it?” Steve spoke up, eyes never leaving the road. “Why’d I do what?” you responded, locking your phone and putting it in the cupholder. Ignoring the continuous flash of your screen which you assumed to be new messages from Bucky. “Everyone knows you love him back, Why’d you tell him that you don’t?” Taking a deep breath, you close your eyes. “I never intended to hurt him... but I will not be a homewrecker. I thought that I’d be alright, that I could handle being around Bucky. But I underestimated how strong my feelings were… Steve, I’m coughing flower petals.”

“I saw it. The carnation, Y/N. I know what it means...” Steve spoke sadly. “What do I do Steve? Am I going to die?” Steve quickly turned the car around and began driving back to the house. “Steve, what are you doing?” You panicked, hoping that Steve wasn’t driving back to Bucky like you thought he was. “You are going to speak to Bucky, I know he loves you back.” Steve spoke firmly, not allowing himself to be swayed as you began to cough again. “I’m not going to watch you die Y/N, especially not when it’s an easy fix. Your love isn’t unrequited!” laughing bitterly you picked up some of the petals from your lap and held them out to the super soldier “Then why all the petals?” Steve grabbed a napkin from the glovebox and took the flowers from you “I will take those to Bruce to look at while you talk to Bucky”. 

“I’m not doing this Steve!” you spoke ready to open the door of the moving car, but before you realised it you were parked in front of the facility and your door was being opened by Steve who was dragging you inside and back into your bedroom. The door was slammed shut and you could hear it being locked from the outside. “Jarvis, unlock my door please.” you commanded but there was no response. Sighing, you closed your eyes and slid down onto the floor. “Y/N?...” a soft voice spoke which made you open your eyes again hastily. Bucky was now crouching in front of you with a worried expression on his face. Your chest began to tighten and you could feel petals inching up your throat. “No, no, no, no!” you stood up and began tugging on the door handle as you began to cough excessively. “Y/N, what is going on?” Bucky swiftly picked you up bridal style and carried you to the bed as struggled to breathe.

“Y/N! Y/N! Doll! Just look at me okay, look at me and match my breaths.” Looking at Bucky you breathed in and out copying his breathing pattern, allowing you to slowly catch your breath again. Stroking your hair comforting, Bucky physically relaxed for a second before a sad expression formed on his face. Standing up, Bucky examined the petals on the floor before turning back to you “You’re sick.” you opened your mouth to disagree but you couldn’t. “I’m- I…” You let out a defeated sigh and moved to try unlocking the door again but Bucky grabbed your arm and pulled you into a hug. You began to cry. 

There was no place you would rather be than in the arms of the man you loved but you knew deep in your heart he was meant for another. “I love you, Bucky.” Your sudden words made Bucky’s eyes go wide. He couldn’t believe what he was hearing. You took a deep breath savouring the moment before pushing yourself from his grasp.

“But I shouldn’t be here…”

Closing his eyes, a single tear slipped down his cheek as he gingerly interlaced his fingers with yours. “I know.” he spoke, taking off his wedding band and twirling it between his fingers. “Our timing was off.” you spoke, looking down at all the flower petals that had scattered the floor. “Yeah.” he replied letting out a bitter chuckle and squeezing your hand. 

You knew the answer to the next question would break your heart, but you still asked it anyway. “Do you love her?” there was a moment of silence before Bucky nodded his head yes. You knew deep down that you weren’t fated to be together and there was nothing you could do about it. “Then that’s all that matters.” you spoke calmly before taking the ring out of Bucky’s hand and sliding it back onto his ring finger.

“But I love you too-” Bucky interjected, grabbing your face in his hands. Tears brimming his eyes as he gently caressed your face. Smiling sadly you removed his hands from your face and moved over a bit. “You can’t love us both”. The two of you stood there in silence, hands still interlocked. “I know what you have, Y/N. You’ll die.” Bucky’s voice cracked, making things so much harder for you. Turning to face him, you smile as genuinely as you could “Or maybe I won’t, I’m a healer Buck. Maybe I can heal myself.” Bucky smiled sadly down at you before kissing your head and moving to sit on the bed. He was torn, you could tell and it broke your heart that you were the reason for his internal conflict.

He wanted to save you, because in all truth he did love you. But suddenly a thought crossed his mind. Before he knew of your feelings for him, why was he not coughing petals over the thought of you not returning his feelings. Was it because he moved on with her? Was he really in love with you? Or was it familiar love like you had said? Only time could tell, but time is something you didn’t have.

Deep down you both knew nothing but love could save you. 

Oh what luck some must have. To love and to be loved in returned. 

[h2bakugou]

Hi there! Can I please request the main three + Kirishima with an s/o who has younger siblings and is used to them buttering them up thinking it’ll help them avoid getting into trouble so when their boyfriend compliment them they instinctively turn to him and is all like “Alright you demons, what did you do this time?” Before realizing that it’s just their boyfriend? Thanks!

a/n: hi!! of course! this request is super cute, having siblings is both a treasure and a nightmare lmfao. thank you for the request love!!

headcanon: them with an s/o who has younger siblings

key: (y/n) - your name / (f/n) - first name / (l/n) - last name / (e/c) - eye color / (h/c) - hair color / (y/q) - your quirk

warnings: fluff, swearing

»»————-　★　————-««

izuku midoriya

»»————-　★　————-««

Having younger siblings is truly a blessing. Sometimes.

You love your siblings, you do, but they are pure chaos. 

“Did we ever tell you how pretty you are?” Your younger sister’s voice rang out. You were just shopping for some snacks and they wanted to come with you.

You knew they’d done something. They always buttered you up so you wouldn’t get mad. But no matter what they did, you’d still love them. Being stern was just a way of teaching them, you wouldn’t go as far as actually hurting them if they did something bad.

“What’d you do this time?” You question, turning around to eye both your younger sister and brother.

Covered almost head to toe in what you assumed was baking flour, your brother and sister smiled back up at you. You let out a small laugh before returning to your older sibling instinct.

“What were you guys even doing?!” You placed the snack you’d picked up in your basket and sighed, taking both of their hands and walking over an aisle where the opened bags of flour laid, covering the floor.

“We wanted to get the sugar you needed! So we stood on the shelves to get it.” Your younger sister spoke softly, smiling.

“I see. Well next time, if you can’t reach something, ask first okay? You could get hurt if you fall back.” 

No matter the situation, you always try to make the moment a teachable lesson. They’re still growing, they’re going to make mistakes. That’s okay.

If there’s anything you can do, you just want to teach them the right way to do things, or at least the best of the options.

“We will!” Your brother promises, hugging you, coating you in flour from your waist down.

“You’re going to need to pay for the bags of flour.” A store employee speaks, already bringing the equipment to clean it up.

“Of course, here you go.” You hand over the money and head to check out, bringing your flour-coated siblings along.

“We’re gonna get a bubble bath after this!” Your younger sister spoke up, which started your brother.

“Bubble bath! Bubble bath!”

It’s a long day of cleaning up before you can relax.

You sometimes forget you’re at the dorms. Despite not actually having your siblings around, you still feel like whipping Mineta into shape is about as close as you can get.

It never works, but maybe one day it will.

“You look beautiful, (Y/n).” The comment totally throws you off. And you’re quick to come with a response.

“What’d you demons do this time-”

Realizing it was Izuku who complimented you, you immediately started to feel flustered.

“What?!” Izuku’s a bit confused. You waved your hands and eventually hid your face.

“My younger siblings always butter me up and compliment me when they’ve done something. I forgot I was at the dorms for a second.” You laugh. Midoriya smiles and gives you a hug.

“That’s so cute. I didn’t know you had siblings.” You hug Midoriya back and sigh.

“I love them to death, they’re little shits but I wouldn’t have it any other way.”

»»————-　★　————-««

katsuki bakugou

»»————-　★　————-««

Your younger brother reminds you a lot of Bakugou. He’s loud and obnoxious, but he can be sweet.

It doesn’t change the fact that the little devil practically butters you up when he knows he’s done something to get in trouble.

For example, the time he put superglue on his teacher’s chair. 

“You know I love you so so much and I wouldn’t have anyone else be the best older sibling?” Your brother smiled at you, even handing you a store-bought cupcake.

“Something seems...suspicious. Is there hot sauce in this cupcake?” You eye the cupcake.

“No.” Your brother laughs.

“What’d you do then?” You quirk an eyebrow up at him, waiting for what line of trouble you’d have to get him out of now.

“I sorta put superglue on my teacher’s chair and now they’re going to call home and I don’t want mom to be mad at me, it was just a harmless prank and no one got hurt!” Your brother explained. Despite wanting to burst out laughing, you knew where he was coming from. 

“Alright. I’ll talk to them, and I imagine I’ll have to sign something too?” You set the cupcake down on the counter and look at your brother.

“Yup!”

You extended a hand for a high-five which your brother joyfully completes.

“Good prank, but let’s not do it again. I might not always be able to pick up the calls made home.” You gave him a hug, ruffling his hair.

“Thank you for being honest with me.” You smiled.

“You’re welcome!”

Your brother, while being a little devil, was honest. You’d tried your best to help teach him while he was growing up that honesty was a good quality in someone strong, and your brother wanted to be the strongest.

Answering the phone call, you sat beside your brother, telling them how it wouldn’t happen again and that if need be, you’d replaced the pants his teacher had been wearing that day as a sort of apology.

Also signing the note that ‘proper punishment’ would be distributed for his actions, you packed it up in his bag for the next day.

Being in the dorms was honestly a bit lonely. You loved your brother, albeit he was chaotic, you missed him coming to you with his tales of how he was king of the schoolyard.

Walking down the seemingly empty hallway toward your dorm, a compliment threw you off.

“Did I ever tell you how much I loved you?” The voice didn’t belong to your brother but your first instinct was to ask what the hell he’d done now.

“What’d you do this time?” You turn and see your blonde boyfriend staring at you with a funny look on his face.

“I mean uh...hey Bakugou!” You can feel your face heat up.

“I was saying I loved you, I didn’t do anything.” Bakugou confronted you. You nodded and let out a laugh.

“I have a brother who says the same thing to me when he gets into trouble.” You lay your arms across his shoulders.

“He reminds me a lot of you actually. He wants to be the strongest hero ever one day.” You smile, knowing that Bakugou’s goal was pretty close to that.

“Oh really? Well, he’ll have to surpass me!” 

“I think you’d really get along with one another. He’s a secret All Might fanboy too.”

»»————-　★　————-««

shoto todoroki

»»————-　★　————-««

Todoroki knows what it’s like to have siblings, but being the youngest himself, he wasn’t aware of what it was like to be an older sibling.

You, on the other hand, were an older sibling. You had a younger sister that was quite devious.

She usually found herself getting into trouble out and about, whether it be in school, or whenever you went out to the store with her, she always caused some chaos.

Like the time she ‘laid a trap’ in one of the grocery store aisles.

She’d spilled some water and waited for someone to come and walk through the puddle. But she was caught before someone did something.

The store attendant brought her over to you where she proceeded to butter you up.

“You’re so beautiful, I love you so much you know that right?” She smiled, grabbing onto your hand.

“Oh yeah, what’d you do this time?” You ask, turning your attention toward her.

“She spilled water all over the floor which could’ve lead to an accident. I’m going to have to ask you both to check out and leave.” The attendant wasn’t happy. You were a little upset but you’d make this moment memorable.

“Just a second please.” You spoke to the attendant before bending down to your sister’s level.

“Why did you spill water on the floor?” You asked, waiting for her response.

“I was laying a trap!” 

“Yes, but what could’ve happened if someone got caught up in the trap?” You asked, holding her hands as she starts to come to a realization.

“They could’ve gotten hurt.” She speaks softly.

“Mhmm, and would you want someone to get hurt?” You tilt your head to the side.

“No. Only bad guys hurt people.” She nodded, her smaller fingers looping with yours.

“That’s right, and you want to be a hero one day right? Like All Might?” You smile.

“Yup! He’s the coolest!” 

“Alright, so no more laying traps! Let’s apologize okay?” You turn to the store attendant who seems almost impressed by how fast you’d turned the interaction to positive instead of negative.

“I’m sorry Mr. Man! It won’t happen again! I’m gonna be the next All Might!” Your sister cheers as you head out of the store, not buying anything.

You take your sister with you to the dorms on one of your days off. You promised she could meet All Might, and while they’re playing in the common room, you completely blank at a compliment made to you.

“You’re so beautiful.” Todoroki says softly.

“What’d you do- Sho!” You try not to embarrass yourself. You look over and see that your sister is still playing with All Might, holding his action figure and zipping around imaginatively.

“I didn’t do anything. Why do you ask?” Shoto hugs you briefly before looking at you with concern.

“No no, my sister usually compliments me before telling me she got into trouble. I blanked for a second.” You reassure him that he hadn’t done anything. You give him a quick kiss on his cheek before looking back to watch your sister.

“I didn’t know you had a sister until today.” Todoroki smiles, holding your hand.

“She’s a little rascal but I love her. You’re the youngest of your family aren’t you?” You nudge him.

“I am-”

“Awe you’re the baby!” You hug him, poking his cheek and teasing him lightly.

“I’m 16, not an infant-”

»»————-　★　————-««

eijiro kirishima

»»————-　★　————-««

Your little brother is quite spirited. He’s chaotic but as sweet as can be.

But he never fails to butter you up when he gets into trouble.

“You’re so pretty, red really is your color!” He smiles as he stands before you, holding something behind his back.

“Mhm, what trouble did you find yourself in now?” You ask, sitting down in a chair at your kitchen table.

“I need someone to sign my report card, and my grades are low.” He says softly. He’s a bit sad, and for some reason, you feel upset.

“I can sign it for you, but why are your grades low?” You ask, looking at his report card. His math grade was dangerously close to failing, and his science grade wasn’t too high either.

“I fell behind.” He speaks quietly, ready for a scolding.

“I’ll sign your report card, but can you promise me something?” You ask, getting a pen ready.

“Mhm!” He lights up, a half-smile on his lips, still worried he’s about to get yelled at.

“If you need help, ask for it. There’s nothing wrong or unmanly about asking for help.” Quoting your boyfriend, you feel a bit silly. You sign off on his report card and hand it back to him, ruffling his hair.

“I have a study group you can come to if you want, you could meet Eijiro!” You know it’s probably a bit overwhelming to study with a bunch of high schoolers while being so young, but you’re positive Bakugou would help him out.

“Yes! I wanna go!” He smiles, vibrating with excitement.

On the day of the study group, Kirishima compliments you like he usually does. But being so focused on picking your brother up for the study group you space out.

“You’re so pretty, and wow red is so you’re color!” Kirishima comments, his favorite red sweater resting over your shoulders.

“What’d you do this time...” You freeze when you notice it’s Kirishima complimenting you instead of your younger brother.

“I just complimented you is all!” Kirishima smiles, his toothy grin making you smile as well. You hug him and laugh.

“I know, my brother tends to call me pretty when he gets into trouble. He’s coming to the study group tonight actually.”

“Awesome! wait you have a brother?” Kirishima’s excited, probably more excited to meet your brother than he is.

When you return with your brother and arrive at the study group, everyone is happy to meet him.

“This is Ei, my boyfriend.” You introduce your brother to Kirishima.

“What’s up, little man?!” Kirishima gives your brother a fist bump and smiles.

“I see why you chose him.” Your brother comments. You turn red, shaking his head.

“He’s about as red as you are!” Your brother teases you, poking fun at your blush. You sigh and sit down with him, showing him the basics.

“Bakugou can you help me with number four?” Your brother bravely approaches the blonde who isn’t exploding for once.

It’s the most calm you’ve seen Bakugou in a while. But your brother learns a lot from him, and from Kirishima. 

Kirishima loves your little brother and he’s happy he got to meet him.

»»————-　★　————-««

masterlist

[jawabear]

(2) Rule Breaker (Bucky Barnes x Reader)

Not my GIF

A/N: so here’s the part two of Rule Breaker. It’s a little bit longer than I originally planned and it is also 87% smut (that’s probably not an accurate figure but you get my point). I hope you enjoy it as much as the first part. This one is happier so...yay. Sorry for any mistakes. Stay safe.

Genre: Angst, Fluff, Smut

Warnings: fem!reader, smutty things, oral (fem receiving), fingering, *slight* arm kink, can you blame me, Bucky being cute, but also hot, Maybe Bucky is a little shy

Summary: Bucky has another name to add to his list of his amends

Part 1

It had been nearly a month.

Nearly a whole month had past and he hadn’t seen her once. She hadn’t called him or texted him. But he hadn’t called her either. He just assumed that she was done with him now after what he did. But he wasn’t done with her.

“So why don’t you call her?” Dr Raynor asked him as she tilted her head to the side a little.

“She won’t want to speak to me” he mumbled as he fiddled with the leather gloves covering his hands.

“How can you be so sure of that?”

“Because of the way she looked at me. She smiled but I could see the pain in her eyes. I told you I hurt her. I broke her heart. Why would she ever want to talk to me again?” Bucky question, Dr Raynor could hear slight anger in his voice, something she hadn’t heard in him before. But he was angry at himself, she could tell that.

“Because, if what you’ve told me about her is true, then she isn’t the type of person to cast someone aside after one mishap. Especially not you. You’ve told me she is a forgiving person, James. And she must care for you as much as you care for her, which I can tell is a lot”

“I don’t think she’ll forgive me” he said to himself.

“As a condition of your pardon, you have three rules to follow” Raynor continued “you broke rule number two. You admitted that to me. So now, you have to make amends”

Bucky didn’t say anything and just looked away. For once he actually agreed with her. He did need to make amends. He needed to fix his broken relationship. Fix her broken heart.

“But what if she doesn’t let me?” Bucky muttered under his breath. He was thinking out loud, but it was also a genuine question. What if she didn’t accept his apology? What if she had moved on? Found someone better than him.

“You won’t know until you try” Raynor shrugged. Bucky let out a dry laugh at the comment. Something he had heard since he was kid. “You either try and make amends, or I have you arrested for breaking the terms of your pardon”

“That’s a little extreme don’t you think doc?” He questioned.

“Maybe you need a little extreme to motivate you to do the right thing” he frowned slightly still not looking at her. “Now, I know I haven’t met her. But I have met you before, during and after being with her. And if I’m being honest, I much prefer the person you were during being with her. And I’m sure you do too”

Bucky could stop thinking about Dr Raynor’s words on his way home. There was truth in them that was terrifying to him. He knew she was right. He would have to apologise to her and make amends for breaking rule number two. But the same questions he had asked himself were still lingering in the back of his mind. What if she didn’t accept his apology, and what if she had moved on already?

It wouldn’t be difficult for her in finding another partner. She was perfect and could get anyone she wanted. But he selfishly wanted himself to be the only person she’s with. He felt a little sick at the thought of her being with someone else. They wouldn’t be able to make her happy the way he did. But perhaps at the same time, they wouldn’t break her heart the way he did.

There were too many thoughts in his head. So many that it got to a dangerous point where he felt his head was going to explode. The feelings inside him were ones he hadn’t felt since his HYDRA days. Things he hadn’t felt since being with her. The feelings of fear, anger, and sadness.

Bucky needed her.

He knew why he needed her. He knew why he wanted her. She made everything okay.

When he was with her, it felt as though he was back in Wakanda. Back in his calm. With her, the world wasn’t moving at a million miles a minuet. It moved as fast as he wanted it to move. With her, he felt like he was in control. He felt like he was truly free.

And he wanted that freedom back. He hated that his thoughts were clouded again like before. He hated that he felt so conflicted like before. He hated that he felt so out of control, so trapped, so alone just like before. Only she could make him better. Only she could make him free.

It was late now. It was dark out but the streets were just as busy as they were in the day light. Such is the way of people. Such is the way of the city that never sleeps. But aside from that, he was far more concerned with the fact that in all his clouded judgment his feet had brought him to place he longed to be. Not his own home, but hers.

He knew the road to her place probably better than he did his own. Her place was nicer than his, for starters, she had furniture. And more importantly, it was where she was.

But now Bucky began to feel panic more than anything. Panic that he was stood outside her door and she was most likely inside. He began to quickly weigh up his options. Either leave and try and forget all about her, or stay and hope for the best in apologising to her.

Knowing that trying to forget her and moving one would be utterly impossible for him, his only other option was to knock on her door and stage out his apology.

His metal hand knocked slowly three times on the wood of her door. And so he waited. While waiting, he mapped out a vague script of what he wanted to say to her. But there was so much he wanted to say to her that it was nearly impossible to try and shorten it down. Especially since at any second she could’ve opened the door.

But when her door opened, all his thoughts disappeared. His script was torn up and forgotten. All his earlier emotions of anger, fear and sadness had washed away. He was just happy to see her again. He was overwhelmed at seeing her again. Not just with happiness, but relief and guilt to go along side it too. It was quite a strange feeling. But what mattered more was that she was there in front of him.

“James?” She said quietly. She didn’t looked angry at seeing him. Or sad. She looked a little confused. And her confusion only increased at what he did next.

He didn’t really know what came over him. Perhaps it was the overwhelming emotions that cause him to do what he did. He surged forwards, taking her face in his gloved hands and pushing his lips against hers in a desperate kiss. He walked her backwards into her apartment, the door swinging shut and locking behind them.

Bucky didn’t know where here was walking her too. Just to the nearest stopping point he guessed. That was her kitchen table. The place where most their monumental moments happened. It was where they had their first date, where they shared their first kiss, where they shared their stories and when they both first said ‘I love you’. And now it would be the home of his desperate plea for her forgiveness.

He pulled his trembling lips from her but still held her face in his hands. He didn’t care about the tears falling down his face, and he didn’t care that he probably looked crazy, his emotions were building up inside him and his words tumbled from his lips.

“I know I...I have no right to be here. No right to be...kissing you after what I did. But (Y/N)...I want you to know how sorry I am. I’m so sorry for hurting you. I never wanted to. I was just...scared. So scared of being in a relationship. Scared of being with you. Being with someone so perfect. I don’t deserve you. But I love you” he sobbed as he began kissing her again “I love you so much. You are what I’m looking for. I only want you. I only need you”

He was expecting her to push him away which is why he was so desperate to kiss her for as long as he could, he was terrified that this would be the last chance he would ever get to be with her.

She did push him away but not forever. She smiled at him and took his face in her gentle hands, wiping away his fast flowing tears that didn’t cease no matter how hard he tried to conceal them. “You don’t need to apologise to me, Bucky” she whispered “even though it did hurt, I accepted your reasoning. I understand that for someone like you, being in a relationship is probably terrifying. I just wanted you to be happy which I why I let it go. But in a selfish way, I want you to be happy with me. Because I love you Bucky. And I’ll always be here to love you. I’ll always be here for you”

Bucky didn’t reply but instead forced his lips on hers again in a more passionate kiss than before. She smiled into the kiss and slipped her arms around his neck. He moved his around her waist and lifted her off the floor, her legs immediately wrapping around his waist as he carried her to her bedroom still knowing the exact path to take to get there.

He lay her in the centre of her bed, putting her down gently carful not to damage the precious being that she was. He pulled his lips off her and pressed a light kiss to her forehead “you do make me happy. Happier than anyone else has” his hands began to wander over her body and she sank into every touch. “Let me show you how happy you make me” Bucky’s voice was lower now and more rough. It sent a small shiver down her spine and she nodded her head making him chuckle a little.

Bucky’s fingers trialled up under her shirt making her shiver at the cool touch of his metal hand against her warm skin. As his fingers moved up her body, he took her shirt with them. Pulling it over her head and tossing it to the side now trailing kisses down her torso making love to every inch of her bare skin.

“I’m never letting you go again...” he whispered before dragging his tongue down the navel between her breasts, silently thanking what ever god there was above him for the fact she had decided not to wear a bra for whatever reason. “You’re going to be stuck with me forever” he smirked as he looked up at her.

Her hands rose to his cheeks and pulled his face back to hers, pushing her lips against his. “I don’t want to be anywhere else” she muttered against his lips before he shoved his tongue into her mouth.

He hummed against her lips as he licked all the inside of her mouth reclaiming what was his. Her fingers threaded themselves into his soft hair gently tugging on the strands as his tongue still continued its journey inside her wet cavern.

Cool fingers slid back up her sides and the black metal fingers began circling her nipple before pinching it and making her squeak “Bucky” she said breathlessly as he pulled back from her lips looking a little too proud of himself.

“I’ve still got it” he joked making her laugh before he kneaded her breast in his hand. Her head rolled backwards giving him prime access to her luscious neck that he loved so much. Bucky waisted no time in attaching his lips to her neck, sucking on that perfect spot while still gently squeezing at her breast. Her hands fell to his shoulders, gripping them lightly as she pressed her knees against his hips, trying in vain to suppress the wetness forming between her legs.

(Y/N) curled her fingers, rolling the fabric of his jacket in them making her groan a little. She wanted to feel him again. But not with this jacket on, not with his shirt on either. But she was far to content in the lush feeling of the way he so expertly made love to her neck. His tongue massaging her skin before sinking his teeth into it and them going back to rubbing his tongue over it. It was a pattern. A cycle. One that she desperately loved.

But right now, what she would love more than that, was to see that well built body of his. “Bucky” She hummed as she began pushing at his shoulders slightly, a signal for him to pull away. When he did, he looked down at her in concern, worried he had done something wrong.

“What is it?” He asked quickly. Her hands slipped down his front, unzipping his jacket as they went before she slid her fingers up under his shirt tracing the outline of his abs.

“I want to see you..” she whispered dangerously close to his lips. He let out what could only be described as a growl before shrugging off his jacket before sending it off in the same direction as he had her shirt. He sat back on his knees and pulled his shirt over his head before flinging that too to the slowly growing pile of clothes.

When entering her bedroom, he hadn’t bothered to turn on the light. So the only light that could be seen was that from the hallway of her apartment and the light from the bustling city outside. Both made his body glow like a god. He was simply heavenly.

She pushed herself up into a sitting position. It was now her turn to show him some love. She peppered wet kisses all over his chest, paying more attention to his collar bones, knowing he loved it when she kissed him there. He let out a gasp of almost relief at getting to feel her lips on his body again. His teeth sunk into his bottom lip as he relished in the feeling of her lips and tongue everywhere on his torso and her hands everywhere else.

But as much as he love it, he had to stop her. He was the one who had to make it up to her. He was the one who had to make amends. Bucky brought his hands down onto her shoulders and pushed her away from him, looking down at her as she looked up at him.

Quite the sight she was. The patched of wet on her neck from his kisses shone in the dim but colourful light from the city. Her eyes were somehow both innocent and devious. And her lips were parted, letting out soft pants that fluttered against his skin.

“This is about you, doll” he whispered to her in a low voice as he carefully pushed her back down onto the bed “this is only about you” she didn’t answer him with words but just gave him a kind look which he took as a sign to continue.

And continue he did.

Once again, his mouth fell on her skin, moving further and further down her body. His fingers hooked into the waist band of her pyjama bottoms making sure to get her underwear as well before effortlessly pulling them down and tossing them to the pile. Now leaving her in all her naked glory. Bucky got to his knees again and looked down at her. She was the heavenly one to him. Glowing like a goddess. Shining like a queen. And she was all his. Bucky smiled at the thought before shuffling further down her bed and slowing himself between her thighs, now face to face with her glistening wetness.

“Oh baby” he whispered, more to himself really. He slipped his arms around her thighs to pulled her closer to him. His tongue slipped out past his lips and teased her clit making her whimper as her finger slid back into his hair. He did thins a couple more times before giving her what she wanted.

His tongue flattened between her folds making her moan and arch her back into the air. “Bucky..” she moaned, her fingers tightening in his hair. Her voice trailed off into desperate gasps, rolling her hips into his mouth. He didn’t try to stop her. He was just as desperate for her as she was for him.

His arms tightened around her thighs holding her closer to him, his face now literally buried between her legs eating her out like a starved man. But in some respects he was, he was one month starved of her. He was going to make up for that lost time.

Bucky’s mouth had now fully engulfed her mound making her writhe with pleasure under him, moaning his name and digging her nails into his scalp making his groan in response, the vibrations sent more pleasure coursing through her body. His tongue swirled round and round her clit.

She cried out his name when he sucked harshly on her sensitive bud, her hips bucking up against his mouth “fuck...Bucky..” she panted. But Bucky didn’t respond, he just carried on eating his month overdue meal.

It wasn’t long before she felt her climax approaching. This she didn’t need to vocalise. Bucky could always tell when she was close without her having to say a word. So he went harder making her mouth fall open and her hands go limp in his hair as pleasure consumed every inch of her being. He hummed along with her breathless moans and slowed his tongue, working her through her climax before removing his mouth from her and slipping his arms from her thighs.

“Was that good?” He asked. A rhetorical question. He knew the answer already.

“Yes...” was all she could say, her body still reeling from the intense pleasure.

He kissed his way back up her chest and ghosted his lips over her “do you want some more?” He whispered roughly making her body tingle. (Y/N) couldn’t answer him with words, nor any action. All she could do was whimper in agreement, but that was good enough for him.

Bucky’s fingers wandered back down her sides as he pushed his lips back onto hers in a deep and slightly sloppy kiss, his tongue wasting no time in intruding into her mouth, not that she was in any fit state to deny him access anyway. (Y/N) could feel the cool metal fingers dance along her slick folds and she instinctively spread her legs a little more.

“So you do want more?” He asked with a dark chuckle as he pulled back from her lips again. She looked up at him through her lashes and hazy eyes.

“Yes James...” she whispered knowing what it did to him when she said his name. It drove him crazy. This whole venture had caused great strain in his boxers, he was rock hard but he knew he could hold out for a little longer. He still didn’t feel he had made amends yet.

He sat back in his knees again and ran his hands along the curves of her body, bringing them both between her thighs and dragging both thumbs between her folds. The contrast of his warm flesh and his cold metal thumbs was simply divine. It was making her head spin as he continued to massage her pussy. It was so dizzying that she almost missed his question.

“Which one do you want?” He asked her. She knew it was in reference to which hand she wanted him to finger her with. Ideally she wanted both but she had always favoured his left. Something about that metal arm could work wonders that nothing or no one else could.

(Y/N) brought her hands to his shoulders and glided her right hand down his left arm. The look in her eyes was indication enough that his left was the one she wanted, although, he could’ve guessed that before he even asked. His flesh hand rested on her stomach to hold her hips in place as he sunk two cold fingers into her heated core.

She let out a strangled moan and reached out for his wrist as he began pumping his metal fingers in and out of her soaking pussy. Her eyes bore into the almost black metal of his vibranium arm. She hadn’t, in their month apart, forgotten how much she loved his metal arm, but her memory had failed to replicate just how amazing it made her feel. She became a whimpering and moan mess under his touch, incapable of saying anything other that splutters of his name.

Bucky looked down at his treasure with fond and almost proud eyes. Proud that he was able to bring such a strong willed, beautiful woman down to such a submissive being. Her eyes rolled to the back of her head as she became utterly at his mercy, she was completely speechless and practically breathless as well.

He didn’t go fast, but he didn’t go slow either. He always knew the perfect pace to set to drive her crazy. His fingers were still just as dizzying as before and she was rendered completely useless under his touch. But that was what he wanted. He wanted her to feel the best she possibly could. He wanted to make her feel the best she possibly could. And he almost was. Almost.

“Bucky...please..” she pleaded.

“Please what baby?” He asked, twisting and turning his fingers inside her making her face twist and turn with pleasure.

“I want...fuck...I want you...” she managed to say. Bucky hummed lightly to himself and eased his fingers out of her, placing her fingers on her clit and guiding them round in circles. She looked at him in confusion but he only smirked down at her.

“I don’t want your pleasure to end, doll” he told her before reaching over to the beside table knowing there would be condoms in there. He was right. He fished one out and took it between his teeth before momentarily climbing off the bed to rid himself of his bottoms layers of clothing.

She watched him with keen eyes as he undressed himself, her fingers still circling her clit as thoughts began to fill her mind of what was to come. With his clothes now gone, he ripped open the foil packet and slipped the item onto his solid length before climbing back onto the bed. He gave her a final look to make sure she was still okay. (Y/N) nodded her head a little, giving him the go ahead.

Her fingers stopped and there was a brief moment between them before he began pushing himself inside her making them both groan in pleasure and relief. “Fuck..” he hissed “I forgot how tight you are”

“Hmm...and I forgot how big you are..” she said, her fingers stroking over his v-line as he continued to sink himself into her.

He let out a long breath as he finally bottomed out in her. He felt weak but in a good way. Perhaps a better way to describe it would be relaxed. He fell onto his forearms either side of her head, his face right up close to hers. “I love you” he whispered.

“I love you” she whispered back with a soft smile. Her hands dropped from his hair falling flat on the pillow, he took it upon his to entangle his fingers with her, gripping her hand lightly as he began to slowly roll his hips along hers.

Out of all the things she loved about Bucky, this was near the top of the list. Not the sex as such. The fact that he always wanted to hold her hands as he fucked her. No matter what position it was, he always found a way to have at least on of her hands in his. She didn’t know why and she didn’t want to ask. She didn’t know if he was really even aware that he did it and she was afraid that if she asked then he would stop. But she guessed that perhaps it was a comfort thing, because it definitely brought comfort to her.

Her room was soon filled with the sound of skin on skin, whimpers, pants, moan and groans, and the sound of them whispering sweet nothing and words of praise to each other as his hips gradually began picking up their pace.

Bucky was in heaven. He had almost forgotten how good it felt to be inside her. To have her slick walls pull him in. She was utterly divine. Despite this though, he didn’t much like hearing the sounds he was making. So he buried his face in her neck again in an attempt to muffled his noises at least. It worked for the most part. She was making him feel so good that he couldn’t suppress his noises, but now the sounds of her were really the only ones he could hear.

And they were music to his ears. Sweet, sweet music as her fingernails dug into the back of his hand. He had now established his pace. Not too fast, not too slow. Not too hard but hard enough to ensure he hit that spot inside her perfectly every time. He wanted her to forget about everting else and just remember this. The here and now. And he though the best way to do that was to send white hot pleasure coursing through her veins, making her see stars and making his name the only thing she could say.

That was most certainly the case. It felt as though her body was on fire. His hips angled perfectly to hit that special spot every time. And his smell. That wonderful smell of his only heightened her pleasure. Filling her nose and making her dizzy. Everything about him was dizzying. But in the best possible way. She wouldn’t have it any different and she certainly wasn’t willing to let him go a second time and risk loosing him forever.

Bucky’s hips seemed to falter briefly as he let out a weak moan, his arms shaking a little too. He was close. And so was she. Both of them were squeezing each other’s hands as he drove his hips just that little bit faster and harder into her, his breath coming out in hot, fast pants against the wet skin of her neck. “(Y/N)...Oh fuck...(Y/N)” he moaned against her.

“B-Bucky...James...come with me” his body shook from hearing his name fall so sweetly off her lips. He managed to pull his head from her neck and slammed his lips down onto her, he always wanted to be kissing her if he could when they came. Just another one of the many things she adored about him.

His breath picked up even more and his fingers began to flex in hers before he rolled his forehead onto hers, their pants of pleasure mixing. He let out a somewhat strangled moan as he came, she followed closely behind him, her walls flexing around his throbbing length as she arched her back into his chest, he knees digging into his waist again.

He began to slow his hips, bringing them both down from their glorious highs. His lips found hers again in lighter kisses. “Fuck...” he whispered “god you’re so good..”

“Me?” She giggled “it’s you who’s the good one”

“Well..” he began between kisses “it takes two to tango I guess”

She all but burst out laughing at this “oh wow!” She said happily making him smile brightly “you are something else Mr Barnes. And I love you for it”

“I love you for a lot of things. That pretty laugh and beautiful smile for one” he told her. He released his hands from hers and slowly pulled out of her before getting off the bed and padding to the bathroom to discard his condom. Whilst he was doing that, (Y/N) sat up, her body still relishing in the pleasure, and leaned over the bed to fish out his shirt before searching for a clean pair of underwear to put on. She also pulled out his boxers knowing he slept in nothing else but them.

She laid them out on the bed before climbing under the sheets and waiting for him to come back. Thankfully it wasn’t long. He walked back into her room in all his naked glory. Her face burned as if she were a teenager seeing a naked body for the first time and not a person who had just been fucked so beautifully by said naked man.

Bucky spied his boxers and picked them up of the bed muttering a thanks as he slipped them on and slipped into bed next to her. Before she had a chance to attempt to snuggle into him, he wrapped his arms around her and buried his face into her neck, holding her flush against him.

For a while, there was a silence between them. It was Bucky who finally broke it by taking in a long breath and letting it back out.

“(Y/N)” he said quietly to her as she slowly ran her fingers through his soft hair. She hummed in response “I really am sorry...for what I did. I don’t really know what I was thinking-“

“Bucky, don’t” she stopped him from continuing his pointless apology “I’ve already forgiven you and I was never angry with you in the first place. I told you already. I understand your reasoning. But I don’t want to hear you apologising any more. It’s in the past. Now, I just want to spend each day with you”

“You will because I don’t want to leave you and I don’t want you to leave me. I want a constant in my life that isn’t just regret or pain. I want happiness and love. And only the happiness and love that you give me”

“I don’t plan on ever letting you go that easy again Bucky. Like it or not, you’re stuck with me”

“Perfect”

15/04/21

[bangtangalicious]

the glow up (5) | pjm, jjk

pairing: jimin x reader x jungkook

summary: after going off to college, you & your best friend committed to working out. a year later, the results show, and you cant wait for your hot hometown friends to see you. now all you wanna do is wild out and have lots of sex, and enjoy it without feeling insecure

genre: angst, smut, childhoodfriends!au weightloss!au (is that a thing) friends-to-lovers!au

word count: 3k

warnings: college boys fighting, jimin’s abs, everyone’s abs, misogyny, mentions of sexual harassment, light smut: threesome (mxmxf), tittie fuck, cock warming, a single spank, gaslighting, toxic behavior, slut shaming

part 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7                                                    masterlist

It was another scorching day. Your stomach turned at the prospect of the day ahead of you. Today was Hobi’s annual summer party. Every summer he would have a big party with literally everyone from your old high school.

Hobi’s party had a notorious reputation of being the scene where all the summer flings were established. You and Jimin would always go together and leave together, never getting too involved. It was boys like Taehyung and Jungkook who really got wild at this.

You hadn’t even thought about how different this party would be for you now, especially after Jimin’s. Normally you and him would catch up with old friends, drink a little bit, but mostly just enjoy the music and have fun together.

Not only would you not be able to hang out with Jimin, but you also would not be able to avoid the heart of party. Hook-up central. The pool.

You shuddered thinking about the last time you were in a pool, where Jungkook had just groped you so openly and you just let him. You liked it. 

You tried to convince yourself that Jungkook’s actions lately didn’t effect you, but for some reason the thought would leave you with a sour taste in your mouth. You and Jungkook had always been cordial, he was part of your friend group, but you two were never specifically that close. You were comfortable with him, but Taehyung was definitely more approachable even back then.

You had texted Taehyung about going to the party together, but he had already made plans to go with Jungkook, and that was the last person you wanted to see.

You really only had one option left.

Next thing you know, you’re back at Jimin’s doorstep, remembering with a wave of guilt how you left him to go fool around with Taehyung just around a week ago. You rang the doorbell.

“Who is it?” You heard from inside.

“It’s me”

Nothing.

“Jimin?”

The door cracked open slightly. Jimin was shirtless, his skin now significantly tanned from when you last saw him, and also his muscles surprisingly more defined. He had clearly been working out a lot since you last saw him.

“Oh hey” His eyes softened when the met yours but you could see the sadness in them. Your heart clenched. You pushed past the door and threw yourself into his arms, giving him the tightest hug you could conjure. “Are you okay?” His familiar scent overwhelmed you, and you wanted to just melt into him.

You nodded, cheek pressed against his shoulder, “God I missed you so much. Jimin stroked your back affectionately before pressing his lips to the top of your head. You looked up at him. “I am so sorry Jimin”

Jimin forced a slight smile, “It’s…fine. What’s going on, is everything okay?”

Not leaving his arms for a second you spilled. You told him everything that transpired. Every thought you had, Every regret. You told him about what really happened at his party, what happened after. You told him about jungkook, taehyung, everything. You could no longer bare to keep anything from your best friend.

You hadn’t noticed, but Jimin was now clenching your waist tightly, his eyes raging.

“Jungkook did what” After a few moments of silence to take in everything you said, Jimin was furious.

You took his hands into yours and sat him down on his bed. “Look it doesn’t matter.” Lies. “I just, I’m so sorry about all of this. I’m such an idiot—“

Jimin pulled away from you, shaking his head. “No way. You have no reason to be sorry. This is NOT your fault. I’m going to fucking kill Jungkook” He tilted his head in anger.

“Jimin, it’s okay just—“

“It’s OKAY?” Jimin yelled, “You’re OKAY with the fact that Jungkook just fucking stuck his fingers in you? And…that fucking Taehyung too…he didn’t do anything to stop him? What the fuck?”

“It’s really not like that Jimin” Jimin ignored you and cracked his knuckles.

“I didn’t” Your voice went small, “I didn’t try and stop him. It’s my fault” Jimin stared at you.

“You know, you could be a lot of things, but I would have never thought you were stupid.” He inhaled sharply before easing his voice back to an appropriate volume, “Are you okay? Like seriously.”

“I think so.”

“Shit y/n. SHIT” Jimin tossed a pillow across the room in frustration before buying his head in his lap.

“Jimin…” You ran your hand through his hair as he tried to calm down.

“I’m the one that should be sorry. God I was such as ass to you. After we had sex too, ugh I regret it so much. The things I said I mean…not the sex. You’re my best friend, it’s my job to protect you and be there for you, and make sure you don’t get hurt. I made our relationship complicated and I’m sorry.” Jim-in raised his face, giving up an intense look, “But so help me y/n, if Jeon Jungkook or Kim Taehyung have the audacity to show their face to me tonight, I will FUCKING end them”

Jimin decided it was best for you two to stick together like usual during the party. You decided to forgo the swimwear completely for the evening, opting instead for a a pair of denim shorts and a tube top. Jimin would have preferred you cover up more, but he didn’t say anything. You put a glittery body spray that added a nice shimmer to your skin in the sunlight.

Hobi’s house was gigantic. Even after all these years, it always excited you to come see all the new things they may have added. Flat screen TVs in the kitchen, a glow in the dark pool table, a whole dance floor, each year brough surprises. Hobi’s pool was on the roof of the house, infinity style. You could already hear the music blasting. It was comforting that there were already a lot of people there, so your entrance could go unnoticed. You saw Taehyung’s white convertible parked from the corner of your eye, letting you know he was already there. Jimin parked the car. You both sat for a while, simply listening the loud bass vibrate your surroundings. The music gave you a sense of confidence. You reached for Jimin’s hand but he pulled it away.

“Let’s just be normal tonight” He tried to smile. You wanted to roll your eyes. He was so hot and cold. You got out of the car. You could see people standing around smoking, old friends hugging and taking selfies. Red plastic cups everywhere. Shirtless guys, bikini-clad girls, familiar faces. It felt like an out of body experience. You followed Jimin, who chose to wear a loose white muscle tee that showed off his toned arms.

“Oh my GOD! Y/n!” You heard some familiar voices of girls from your high school. You smiled and waved, “GIRL YOU LOOK SO GOOD YESSS” You giggled. More girls crowded you, fawning you with compliments, but the attention was short living, as soon they noticed Jimin who was by your side.

Now this glow up made them drool.

“Park Jimin!” “Have you been working out?” “Holy shit, wanna come over later?” “Jiminieeee I missed you oh my gosh”

Good. Take him away sea of ladies. You thought to yourself. Jimin turned to look back at you in worry as he got dragged away. You winked and gave him a supportive thumbs up. Once Jimin was out of sight, you decided to look for Taehyung. 

Where to look first? The pool. You climbed the stairs until you finally got to Hobi’s rooftop, walking out into the intense sun. The pool was packed, music louder here than before. People seemed to be having a great time. There was volleyball, chicken, all sorts of games happening. People were jumping, splashing, it was truly a sight to behold. You saw Junkook right away, with a girl on his shoulders wrestling playfully with Hobi in the water. You stared at him, jaw clenching at how carefree he looked.

“Princess” You turned to see Taehyung, dressed still in partially unbuttoned Hawaiian shirt. In his hand was a cup of what you assumed was beer. “Good to see you” He places a firm kiss onto your lips, lingering a bit. You flinched at the sudden action.

“Taehyung what the fuck” You whispered, looking around to make sure no one had seen you. Taehyung chuckled, wrapping his hand around your waist. His eyes followed where you had been looking earlier.

“Wanna dance with me?” You had no response. Especially because while the two of you were strictly hooking up, Taehyung did seem to really like you, but you suddenly felt overwhelmed. So many people would see you two together. Someone would tell Jimin. And then Jimin would start a fight. Taehyung noticed your hesitation.

“I…I’ll be right back” You wiggled out of Taehyungs grasp and rapidly made your way through the crowd before he could stop you. You barely glanced back long enough to see a confused and slightly hurt look on Taehyung’s face.

It wasn’t long before you heard a whistle.

“Y/n! Babe! Get that sexy ass in the pool” Jungkook cat called. Hobi playfully splashed him, rolling his eyes. The girl on his shoulders just giggled. “Bet I could take you both, if you know what I mean” He winked. You glared at him.

“Excuse me” You felt yourself getting dizzy as Jimin’s voice came booming across the pool. You had no idea when he got up here. He had a few girls surrounding him, but his eyes were glued onto you and Jungkook, who was still in the pool a few feet away from you. He made his way over to you, pulling you back behind him, gritting his teeth. “Get out of the pool Jeon” He spat.

“Nah I’m good Jimin. But hey, I’d be down to share. You me and y/n. Sounds fun” You could hear Hobi mention to the girl that she should probably leave.

“I can’t believe I’ve let you live this long after what you did” Jimin growled, curling his hands into a fist.

Jungkook ran a hand through his hair and smirked, “The fuck did I do? She’s the one screwing Taehyung left right and center. Get mad at her. Bros before Hoes” You placed your hands on Jimin’s arm to keep him from jumping into the pool and pounding Jungkook’s face.

“Jungkook, that’s enough” Hobi said, trying to keep a playful demeanor, “Come on guys, let’s not kill the vibe. Take it inside”

“Any guy here could make a move on her and she’d sleep with them. Because she can. She’s a slut now.” Jungkook raised himself out of the pool, the water dripping down his intense muscles. His tattoos gleamed in the sunlight.

“Inside. Now.” Hobi’s voice became more stern. Jungkook put his hands up in defense. You followed Jimin’s lead and went down into the house, Jungkook trailing closely behind. The three of you reached Hobi’s bedroom.

“Tell me one good reason that I shouldn’t smash your face” Jimin sneered. Jungkook, to your dismay, could not stop smiling.

“I dare you to try”

“Guys!” You finally intervened. “Please, let’s just talk it out” You plopped down on Hobi’s bed. “I wanna get back to the party so just make it quick”

Jungkook suddenly pulled down his shorts. You quickly covered your eyes and Jimin yelled out “What the fuck are you doing?”

“Let’s just have sex.” He whined “It would be so good, think about it. It’s like revenge sex, hate sex, jealous sex all in one.”

You could hear him stroke himself slightly, and you opened your eyes to watch. Jungkook had a body of a God. Your heart raced, unsure if this was a dream.

“You’re insane. I am not having sex with you. And y/n is definitely not.” Jimin approached Jungkook with the intention of pushing him away, but Jungkook was stronger, and simply held Jimin in place, kissing him on the lips. Your eyes widened at the scene. Never would you have thought you would see two of the hottest guys you knew kissing right in front of your eyes.

Jimin pushed Jungkook back, “Dude what the fuck?”

Jungkook licked his lips, “Come on Jimin, don’t be a prude, live a little. It’s an experience”

“My problem isn’t fucking you, it’s you fucking Y/N”

Jungkook turned to you. “Do you want to do this? Do you wanna try it out?”

You bit your lip. You did fantasize about having one someday, just not necessarily with these people. However, Jungkook looked stunning and Jimin made your heart race. It could be amazing.

“I guess I’d be down to experiment…but I don’t know if I’ll like it” You commented, hugging your knees to your chest. Jungkook knelt down and kissed the tops of your knees.

“Oh baby girl, there’s no stopping me once I get my hands on you”

You didn’t have time to process what he said before he was pulling down your shorts and pulling off your top. Your naked breasts bounced in front of his eyes.

“Oh fuck yes” He muttered. He motioned for Jimin to join him on the ground. Next thing you knew, both boys were on their knees before you, each one with their mouth latched to one of your breasts. It was the most erotic sensation you had ever felt. It was overwhelming, and you couldn’t help the loud moans that slid past your lips.

“Oh my…holy…shit that feels” Your sentences were unable to form, it was as if the electric pulses of the way their tongues circled and lapped at your sensitive nipples shut down the rest of your brain. Waves of heat seared through your veins and your hips bucked up unconsciously. Jungkook, who was already naked, helped you lay back on the bed.

“Now, Jimin. Since you two actually like each other or whatever, I’ll let you pick.” He motioned towards your body that was squirming around and begging for their attention. “Pussy or tits”

Jimin frowned at Jungkook’s coarse language, but scanned your body nevertheless, considering his options.

“You are not getting inside her.” He mumbled. Jungkook shrugged.

“Either works” He climbed over your face so that his knees were on either side of you. His large hands pushed your breasts together as he let his long, thick cock slap against your glittering skin. The view wasn’t ideal, but once you felt Jimin’s soft fingers caressing your thighs, you relaxed immediately.

“Condom?” Jungkook asked. Jimin smirked slightly and shook his head. “Oh wow, Park Jimin’s gonna take his bitch raw. Impressive”

“I’m protected you idiot” You mumbled, shutting your eyes so you could focus on the feeling of Jungkook slowly sliding his cock in between your heaving breasts. The invasion accelerated your heartrate. The way his tip just rubbed against the valley of your chest almost feverishly as he picked up his face. You were so turned on you couldn’t believe it.

Jungkook let out soft grunts as he thrusted into you. Meanwhile you could hear Jimin undress and start stroking himself, the sound of skin on skin driving you wild. Your thighs trembled in anticipation.

Finally Jimin was hard and ready for you. He watched carefully as Jungkook fucked your tits mercilessly, his hands clenching your breasts so harshly you were afraid they might bruise. You felt Jimin tease your exposed folds with the tip of his cock. You let out a whimper when he backed up a little to continue stroking himself.

“Jimin” You whined helplessly, “Jimin please. I wanna feel you please”

“I…” Jimin still wasn’t sure that he wanted to do this. Seeing you, with Jungkook almost sitting on your face and using you like a sex doll, it made him feel queasy.

“Jimin baby please I need you” Your voice almost sounded to him like a cry for help. His eyes narrowed at Jungkook who was too fucked out to notice.

Suddenly you felt something wet sprawl all over your stomach. Jungkook came. Everywhere.

“Fuck that was so good” He groaned, releasing his hold on your aching breasts only long enough to slap them harshly before squeezing them again one last time. He carefully got off of you and stood up. You opened your eyes to see Jimin still standing where he was, only this time with his cock out in his hand. Jungkook began to dress himself.

“You missed out Jimin. Oh well” He winked, and as if nothing happened, he was gone.

You and Jimin were silent.

“I…” Jimin stuttered, slightly embarrassed that he froze up and didn’t join in, “I just…couldn’t. The way he was just, using you, I felt…dirty”

You sighed. “Come here” He obeyed, cuddling up behind you. He wasn’t as hard as he could be, so you figured you might as well assist him with that.

You reached down and began stroking his cock. He nestled his face into your neck.

“I’m so sorry y/n” He whispered before letting out a pleasurable whine “I’m so sorry”

He kept apologizing as you jacked him off, eventually spitting in your hands to increase speed at which you pumped him up and down along his length. Something about his pitiful whining was turning you on a lot. You wrapped your whole hand around his cock and guided it in between your ass. Jimin moaned loudly.

“Oh my godddd” He exhaled as you wiggled your ass back and he entered you from behind. “Can we just stay like this for a bit baby? Can you keep my cock warm while I cuddle you hm?”

You nodded, and he softly kissed your neck.

“You’re mine. I’m never sharing you again”

<-----previous                                                                 next------>

A/N: i know the smut was very much not satisfying in this, i promise the next part is nice n dirty. hehe. 

taglist: (lmk if you wanna be added!!) @honeyspillings @hollowtree10

[assemble-revengers]

Nexus Split

**Contains spoilers for Loki**

Pairing: Loki x Reader

Word Count: 2203

Prompt: “Why does it sound like you’re saying goodbye?”

Author’s Note: I woke up and chose violence today.

--

Time was hard to grasp before this whole mess began, but it at least had some structure regardless of how ethereal it seemed. There was structure and a time and place and you just happened to be in the wrong place at the right time so it seemed when you also made a move to snatch up the Tesseract the second you saw Loki move in New York. That’s how you got into this mess and honestly there were many things you had regretted initially. For instance, why couldn’t you have minded your own business?

Well, if you had you wouldn’t have had the opportunity to meet Loki, and at the moment? That felt worth more than anything. It hadn’t started that way -- the two of you were practically at each other’s throats and when you weren’t bickering between each other you were being confused by the politics of the TVA and time in general.

In a wild turn of events you became an unpaid intern all over again. You supposed it was better than dying or “being pruned”. You still were confused as ever by the lingo and even though you had tried your best to pay attention to the onboarding process, but frankly you were still wrapping your head around the prospect of the TVA in general. How had no one even considered this being a possibility? Where did these people come from? It seemed that it just...was? But if that was the case, why was there an onboarding process?

Miss Minutes was terrifying -- she was just so...eerie and popped up randomly and honestly you just wanted a nap. Or to wake up from this bizarre dream.

The worst part was the notion of running into other variants, namely the fact that a variant that had been targeting members of the TVA happened to be a Loki-variant.

“Wonderful,” you retorted, interrupting Mobius with disdain, “There’s another one of him.”

The aforementioned god was sitting across a table from you and you weren’t entirely sure how he was taking the whole thing. According to him, the tesseract was useless here. A paper weight. Another beyond weird thing that the TVA brought.

“We should team up,” a voice interrupted your spacing out and it took you a moment to realize that the voice belonged to Loki. And he was talking to you.

You blinked a few times incredulously, “You have been nothing but cruel to me since we met. Why would I ever help you?” Honestly, the audacity of men.

“I am sorry about that, by the way,” he answered, “I was going through something.”

You couldn’t help the laugh you let out, covering your mouth immediately to try to mute the sound and avoid any more attention. “Aw, that makes it all better.”

There was no reason to hide your sarcasm, and he knew that. You could tell from the way he blanched for a moment before resuming his composure, obviously trying to turn on some godly charm or something onto you, “I was. I truly am sorry.”

“Loki, you stole the Tesseract, tried to take over the world and brought a bunch of crazy alien things into New York City,” you listed, counting off the things on your fingers, “And now because you went after the stupid Tesseract again, with a room full of Avengers I might add, I cannot return to my life which wasn’t that impressive, but at this moment? I kind of miss it. So, no, I don’t accept your apology.” He was silent after that and you went back to your mind palace spiraling about the logistics of what was happening to you.

It was not a great day for you. Week? Hour? Time was weird. It was even more weird when you were suddenly having to do research into the Loki-variant-assassin. Going through files and files of different instances in time was tedious. It was interesting in that some of the things had already happened, were going to happen, and were happening in places you had never even heard of. It was during this that you and Loki had begun to work more collaboratively.

In fact, the moment you guys had made the connection that it was apocalypses? You taught the god of mischief the importance of a high five. Or rather, never leaving someone hanging because you chased him down, yelling at him until he returned the high five before you even allowed him to present your findings to Mobius. The bond continued when you both were treated like unhinged criminals or starved, ravenous animals by pretty much everyone other than Mobius who was...friendly as ever.

You did not have a lot of options in terms of trust. While Mobius seemed genuine, there was no way you could possibly know. The issue was that the only thing that was any level of normal in your eyes was Loki which was...laughable, but he was from your timeline. The two of you were in this together sort of because at this point you wanted to go home and it seemed he did too after the whole semantics of this whole thing. Or maybe he wanted to take over the TVA. Regardless, it gave you some hope that he might be kind and put you into your timeline where you belong.

The feelings came out of nowhere. In fact, you hadn’t even realized it happened until there was a chance for you both to chase after the Loki-variant (or Sylvie as you would learn later) and before Loki went through the portal, he reached a hand out for you, Mobius yelling and you found your feet moving on their own accord, turning to mouth ‘Sorry’ to Mobius before grabbing Loki’s hand and rushing through the portal.

Sylvie was interesting and endearing and was someone you instantly found yourself drawn to. You felt sympathetic to her story, and maybe that was dangerous. Dangerous, but gave you another sliver of hope despite the fact things were bleak. Very bleak. Being on Lamentis-1 about to explode and everyone die bleak. Despite this, the two of you sat and chatted in your booth at the bar while Loki got absolutely hammered and even began to softly serenade you in what you assumed was Asgardian (this was after he sung to the whole room) and you found yourself pulling him back down to the chairs and pulling him into a hug while you laughed.

“Loki, I have no idea what you’re saying,” you giggled, pulling away from him, “But I think you’ve had enough.”

“Darling, I think I’m just getting started,” he answered with the smoothness of butter on a hot pancake. You couldn’t help the burning of your ears and the rest of the blush that began to dance across your features. Sylvie coughed. Moment interrupted (Thankfully? You don’t know). Back to the business of the world ending and no way out. Maybe that’s what let all of you decide to unload tales of the past. Yours was boring and...uneventful comparatively which led you to remain relatively quiet as both Loki and Sylvie talked.

Hearing all of Sylvie’s plight and what brought her to that moment had both you and Loki feeling empathetic. You felt anger that this whole this was allowed and deemed ‘okay’ by the TVA. An entity that really had no checks and balances as far as you could see. You pretended to ignore Sylvie and Loki bonding. You felt your stomach tighten. Envy was ugly and green really was never your color.

But that triggered the TVA rolling up and taking the three of you back. You weren’t sure what you were expecting. You weren’t expecting yourself to start fighting. Your restraints, the situation, the fact you were separated from Sylvie and more importantly Loki. You were utterly alone in your cell, screaming for them to let you out. The person interrogating you entered, tried asking you questions that you just couldn’t hear. Your head was swimming and it was almost as if you were hearing things like you were underwater. Fight or flight and apparently your entire being chose to fight.

Per someone’s orders you were moved, you lit up the moment you saw Loki and soon you were joined by Sylvie. Your restraints were removed and your eyes began watering as you rushed to Loki’s side, grabbing his hand as he gave yours a reassuring squeeze, moving so that he was shielding you from the front. The next thing you knew and before you had a moment to process, Mobius was pruned in front of you and Loki moved to shield you further.

Surprisingly, you were not entirely useless in the fight that ensued, but couldn’t help but feel entirely out of your element. The closest you had ever been to being in a fight in the past was when you were five and some girl stole your crayons and had the nerve to try to eat them.

Your adrenaline was pumping when you turned to Loki a feeling like being shocked by a plug while also being burned by a pan that had been on the stove. You were confused, Loki was yelling something. You couldn’t hear. You reach for him, desperate to calm him down or maybe it was because you subconsciously knew what was happening and you were terrified. The hot, electric feeling spread across your body before what felt like you were dropped in ice cold water and suddenly...your eyes blinked awake. You weren’t at the TVA.

Instead, you found yourself on the run (you hated yourself for missing out on all that gym time because your cardio could use some work) from a cloud that ate things. You would learn that you were in The Void, the evil vacuum of the cloud was called Alioth, and that there were even more Loki variants. One was an alligator. He was your favorite.

Your Loki also turned up and you practically threw yourself into his arms in relief, “I thought I lost you, you idiot.”

“I could say the same to you, pet,” he responded, murmuring into the crook of your shoulder. Reunions had to be cut short after you introduced the other variants, (“And this Loki is an alligator! How cool is that! He’s my favorite of all of you, no offense.”) and now you were seeking shelter to hide from Alioth and...well survive you supposed.

President Loki and the other Lokis were...a lot. In fact, there were so many Lokis that you were beginning to get a tension headache trying to keep up with everything that was going on. Some of them seemed to recognize you, including President Loki that informed you that you were late and with the wrong people (“No? I don’t even know who you are?” “You will.”)

Reuniting with Sylvie and Mobius brought even more relief. Sylvie seemed to think she could enchant the Alioth. You protested quite a bit before she was able to convince you otherwise. There was a way out. You had a chance to go back to the TVA and sort things with Mobius. Maybe go back to where you belong. Maybe stay. You weren’t sure, but it seemed Loki, your-Loki was hesitating.

Mobius was opening the portal behind you to the TVA. You stood with your hand firmly within Loki’s, fingers interlaced as you bid Sylvie a small, quiet ‘good luck, you’ve got this’. You and Loki were right by the portal, a sliver from stepping in before Loki stops, pulling you so that you two were facing each other, your back to the portal.

“What’s wrong?” you ask concerned.

“I’m staying,” Loki affirms, “To help Sylvie, to...do this.”

“Okay,” you lament. You were staying too. You tried to move to leave the portal Loki gave Mobius a heartfelt hug, which ended up being a group hug since Loki wouldn’t let go of you. In fact, as soon as Mobius was released from the hug, you were engulfed into Loki’s arms where you practically melted. The hug ended far too soon, but Loki didn’t release you, holding your face in his hands as he pressed his forehead to yours. It made your heart warm and peace washed over you.

“Loki…” you sigh, feeling an entire lifetime of emotions flooding your system, “I…”

“Shh,” he cuts you off, “I know. I feel the same...but I can’t bear to hear it.”

“Why does it sound like you’re saying goodbye?” You inquire, voice cracking. You felt frozen in place as panic began to bubble up under your skin.

“Because you’re not staying with me,” he murmurs weakly, pressing a soft kiss to your forehead, “I love you, Y/N. Remember that, please.”

Before you could respond, you were shoved by a great force. You couldn’t even react as your grip was easily broken, your sense of balance knocked out from under you. Mobius had already stepped through the portal...surely it wasn’t still up? You landed on the ground, having been knocked off your feet, but you were no longer in the void.

You felt your heart shattering. You couldn’t even cry. He was gone.

[dinthehottotty]

A Thing About Silver (Part 2)

Summary: You face Din after sleeping with Cobb, partially out of spite and fight with Mando. 

Warnings: Angst, smut, gratitious smut. So much. More creampies. Unprotected sex. This is fanfiction. USE PROTECTION. Slight Dom!Din

A/N: I enjoyed writing this wayyyy too much. Good luck. Also I rushed a little bit towards the end cause I’m tired.

Part 1

Mando was moved on to cleaning his blaster now, still waiting. It made you sick.

Ducking your head, you shuffle through the sand and don't bother to look at him as you approach the little dome. He doesn't say anything as you climb the steps he sits on and wordlessly move toward the building.

Sleep called for you.

Leather snatches your wrist, not delicate at all. "Look at me," he manages. It's got no bite. No edge. It's soft and coaxing. Too sweet for your eager ears because now tears are welling in your eyes again at the shame. Immediately you know the truth of things. There is no illusion that you've truly and sorely fucked up. The worry in his voice twists you apart. Would you ever be able to repair the shot your hurt pride took?

Instead you squeeze your eyes shut and tilt your head back, desperately hoping that he won't insist. But it's Din. "Please, look at me," he begs. The attempt to steel yourself and stand your ground crumbles like the sand in your boots.

"I can't," you manage, voice breaking harshly. "Let me go." You pull your hand away and trudge into the little room he'd rented. The child was long since passed out in his floating crib. There was a tiny kitchenette in the corner, one that had been cleaned but a bowl still sat at the table. Then there was a bed and a sofa. Toward the back sat a door, you assume to the 'fresher.

You can hear Din following behind you, heavy boots making the floors creak. "You should eat something," he tries, voice turning tense but he's still just as soft as before. Instead of listening, you move toward the sofa and sink down on it, the fresh tears hot on your cheeks.

There is a split second between when he moves around and sees the tears, and him reaching for you. "Don't," you rasp.

"Did he hurt you?" He snarls, despite his gentleness of his hands flutter over you.

"No," you snap back at him. Finally glaring deep into the visor of his helm. It lasts only a moment. "No, Din, he didn't do anything wrong." You sniffle and fixate on a spot on the wall, then stop fighting the urge and curl in on yourself. How could you sit here and feel sorry for yourself when you'd ruined everything so easily. All for a quick fuck. (Well, not necessarily quick.) You'd pushed and prodded, always hoping for a different reaction but deep down, you'd always known the truth. Din didn't love you in that way.

He paces across the floor in front of you, very quiet, very anxious. Despite feeling the increasing anxiety from it, you decide to push it down. Your own frustration twisting and tightening like a coil. The air was heavy.

That is until your eyes fall on the floating cradle in the corner. Your heartaches, you weren't just losing Din. The kid would go with him.

You had two options. This was an ugly sore that neither of you could ignore. Should you try to resolve it now? Best case, you ride out this wave of shame and stick with Din and the child. They were home to you, but you'd be subjected to the truth that Din would never love you in this way. Trust was probably broken and until you both had mended from the hurt of the situation, the ship couldn't sail smoothly. You'd have to learn to not love Din in that manner, if that was possible. You fear that it would make you bitter. How long would you be staying with Din? Until the kid was gone? Would he be okay after he'd delivered him? Should you both spend the next few nights thinking and settling on your stupidity or would that just encourage further brewing? You didn't know if you could trust yourself to stay level headed or not burst into wails if Din so much as raised his voice.

But you needed it. You need him to scream at you about your recklessness. You needed to be shamed because how could you possibly take Din being this sweet and worried about you. Bile worked it's way up from your stomach, fighting with burning fingertips.

His pacing froze, seeming to watch you with distress, but you couldn't tear your blurred eyes from the levitating bassinette.

"Are you going to leave me?" He asks, his voice much firmer than before.

"I..." You start but slowly trailed off. There were too many words in your head. It was muddled and confused. In the very center of it was the enormous weight of shame and guilt. The utter dread cored from them but gravitating all of the negativity that surrounds your situation. It was tossing you in the oceans of panic, you were drowning. Din's anxiety was driving him to go rigid.

The idea of going to sleep was teasing you. Your eyelids were heavy. What time was it even? It was an empty thought. You wouldn't sleep. Just chasing your tail endlessly.

Din is moving between you and the kid and you realize the possessive tone his voice had carried. The real question was he wanted to ask was 'are you going to try to steal my child?' and he had obviously taken that as a threat. How this must look, you gazing longingly at the sleeping babe in his cradle and not giving the man a true answer.

Your eyes move up the curves of beskar that blocked your view of the little one. More hurt is rising. He wasn't worried you'd leave. He was worried you'd take the wrinkly green baby. Somehow you felt the need to blame the metal that separated him from you. You didn't normally curse the only think that had kept him alive this long, but it seemed to mock you like in Cobb's hut. It spurs a dangerous thought.

If Din wanted to fight, you'd fight.

"Wouldn't you like that? Like me to just walk away?" You hiss, rising off the couch to stare at him. Din's helmet doesn't waver a bit as you close in enough to see the puffiness of your eyes.

"Do you want to walk away?" He snaps back.

"Wouldn't that be easier!" You give a sarcastic laugh. "One of your problems could just walk away! Just say it! Just say you want me to leave you alone!" You shove at his chest weakly.

"Stop," he orders sharply. "You don't know what your talking about."

"Really!? Are you kriffing kidding, Din?"

"You need to eat and go to bed."

"Do you somehow have this sick notion that I'm your kid, too? Because I'm not! I am not a child! I am a hurt, angry, and frustrated adult woman!"

Din places his hands on his hips and towers over you. "Stop putting words in my mouth. Where are you even getting these ideas?"

"You treat me like a kid! I'm trying to show you I'm not one!"

"Well, you're acting worse than one right now!" He snarls through his modulator. You grit your teeth at his response. That one hurt. You knew it was true, the spotchka from tonight had left early tonight. It hadn't been enough to truly get you drunk.

"I have no problem listening to you when you give me a damn reason! Just fucking explain things!"

"I don't want to argue with you." He resolves.

"THERE IT IS!" You nearly screech. "That! You barely give me any scraps! You are so fucking hard to read sometimes and I fucking hate it! All I wanted was you to tell me 'no' tonight but instead you just stared! YOU JUST WATCHED ME WALK AWAY!" Din's visor drops at that. It's not trained on you, but off to the side, down towards the floor. "I COULDN'T EVEN ENJOY IT BECAUSE YOU WERE FUCKING THERE THE WHOLE TIME LIKE SOME DEVIL!" You break, sobbing.

His head twists up. "What?"

"You just stare and mock and-"

"I have never mocked you," he butts quieter than before.

"Why didn't you say 'no'?" You snap, eyes blazing, needing an answer.

He only gives you silence. You squeeze your lips into a hard line in the deafening scream of it. Shaking your head, you twist away. "Fucking great," you mutter to yourself.

A hand reaches tentatively for you, it brushes over the underside of your wrist and onto your palm. "What do you mean I was there?" He asks softly.

"You don't get to do that," you warn him, drawing your hand away again. Normally, you would blissfully sunk into his rare touch but you couldn't shake off the fire that was filling you. Guilt was nagging the back of your mind, knowing you were punishing good behavior. It was fruitless. He didn't want to touch you like that. "You don't get to answers from me while avoiding your own. That's not fair to me!"

Din sighs, turning his head to the side. "I'm... I'm not always good... with words." That one hurts more than you expect to. This man was bound to carve you up and spit you out.

You stop, turning your head towards him. You can see him shift his weight, stepping closer. He's standing right behind you. For the millionth time, you wished that fucking armor wasn't blocking his expressions from you.

"I... don't, just so you know."

"Don't what?"

"Want you to leave."

"Why don't I believe that?" You prod, still feeling antagonistic. Din steps closer, he grasps your arm and turns you. He twists you about so suddenly and forcefully that you're taken by surprise. A gasp leaves you when he suddenly grasps your face.

The air stills as you vibrate with the sudden aggression he's showing. His boots hit hard and heavy. Each step is slow and steady, his helmet only inches from your face that he's tilting up in the borderline painful grip he's got on your face. He's forcing you to walk backwards, supporting your form with the other hand that's gripping your arm. Air is suddenly harder to acquire. The air twisting tightly. "Bruise your cervix?" He prompts lowly. It drags across his tongue, extra ragged. "Use you. Make you feel something." It's not possible for your heart to beat out of your chest but when he's done walking you backwards, you feel like it will.

The air has changed, charged with the electricity of anticipation rather than shame and rage.

"Did Cobb do that?" He asks, nearly whispering. It's not an accusation. You glance towards the bassinette where the kid still sleeps, amazingly.

"I used him," you admit, shame filling you, he doesn't give you the opportunity to dwell on it too long because he's shoving you backwards onto something soft. The bed.

Cue the swell of disbelief. Mando leans down and immediately starts working at your pants, tugging them open effectively. He gathers the edges in his hands just as you remember what is currently leaking from between your thighs. You gasp out, "Din, wait!" much softer than you intend. Your voice failing you in the way you need it to.

Too late. He tugs the fabric down your legs effectively. Once glance tells you enough, he's staring at the mess that is was made between your thighs. "You let him cum in you?" His helm tilts up to your face that you cover with your hands. Your brain is too busy trying to decide if he's awed or offended by the newly reveled information. You try to press your thighs together.

"I'm sorry," you plead between the palms on your face.

Din hooks his hands roughly under your knees and jerks. You're dragged over the bed until your bare ass is seated at the end of the bed and then he pushes your knees up and apart and just... just stares. It's enough of a sight to have you peaking from behind your hands. "Are you sore?"

Fuck, you were supposed to be fighting not... not... well, what even was this? Some kind of slut-shaming? Was it bad that you were this turned on by it. The morbid curiosity was battling the mortification at being examined by the Mandalorian bounty hunter in this manner. His fingers were squeezing and massaging where they rested under your knees, trying to coax an answer from you. "Ah... a little, I suppose."

"Doesn't sound bruised to me."

You gulp.

"Don't move." How could you? You were petrified and incredibly, embarrassingly aroused. He lifts his hands from your legs, leaving you hanging on whatever he decided to torture you with.

The last thing you expect is for those gloves to make their way to his belt and unbuckle it. "I said, 'don't move'," he repeats, pausing in his movements. It's only when he says that you notice you've propped yourself up to get a better view of him. Suddenly bashful, you sink back down to your back. "Open them further," he rumbles lowly. None of his words seem to have any aggression despite his aggressive actions. His town maybe low and he might be ordering you around but there is no real bark to him. It's raspy in a way that you've never heard from him. Drawn out slow in a way that indicates he's in no rush. The balance has you spinning.

But fuck, pulling his pants open and you nearly wheeze when a he palms your forehead, pushing it back into the bed while he reaches within the confides of his clothes. Your left with only a view of the ceiling and his wrist. His bronzed skin peaks out just a hair. "You don't get to look."

"Oh, shit," you breathe, squeezing your eyes shut. What sort of wet dream were you stuck in? There was no way-

Something runs across your most sensitive area, something too thick to be a finger. You gasp and arch as it hits your oversensitive clit right off the bat. A little 'ah' leaves you for only a moment. "It's your eyes," he says and you think you've missed something when he wheezes it out. Then he lines up and slowly, maker, so slowly and completely unhindered, he's breaching you with the cock you've been dreaming of for months. You give a torn moan and arch up, grasping at the sheets. Still it's quiet because of all the things tonight, this is the last thing you want the kid seeing. "Ca-can't speak when... when you look at me." Heat blooms in your chest. He's still pushing deeper. He sinks against your cervix like no one's done before and pushes against it. When his pelvis meets yours, it's stretching you almost painfully. Your cervix is straining at the intrusion. It's lewd how wet it sounds already.

"Din," you sigh.

He gives a shaky groan when you squeeze around him. "Sh-should've told you 'no'," he admits, drawing back. And then he drives back in with force enough to make you cry out, and open further for him. "Ruin you," he murmurs with such a slur you wonder if he's drunk on it. And then his hips start to canter deep and hard. Not fast. Just deep and hard, stretching you beyond what you think you can. You're left mewling and trembling beneath him. "Should go... shove my...," he curses and his hand shifts from your forehead to your throat. "Shove my blaster, ah, kriff, down Vanth's throat."

Wait, he was jealous? Fuck, did that make you clamp down on him.

"Shit, like that?" He rasps out, still like he's whispering to you. "Want you," he promises, lower down so his chest is pinning you to the bed. He's so heavy, but you don't feel like you're breathing anyway. "All the time."

Please, don't let this be another delusion. Please.

"Did-did you just say... say that you saw me... to piss me off?" He urges.

"No," your arms tangle around him, grasping for purchase on his back. "No, I want you so- Kriff! Feels so good - want you so bad, s-saw you the whole time." He shudders in your hold, rolling the cool helmet against your neck as he continued his unhurried pace. He was going to kill you at this rate. "Please," you beg, "Please, Din. F-faster. Need it."

"No, I'm using you," he responds. A hand grips your hip and it's like he doesn't know whether he wants to push you further into the bed or pull you closer.

A familiar feeling rises in you, another orgasm creeping closer. The thought is pushed from your mind as the other hand covers your eyes. The one gripping your hip disappears and then something drops onto the bed. "Don't... don't look." Unmodulated and raw. Din is kissing you then. His mouth wet and hot and welcoming in this inferno of a hut.

He tastes so good and his tongue slips against yours eagerly. You would tear your eyes out if it meant you could feel his soft stubble against your mouth like this. You moan into his mouth and he eats it up with a particularly hard thrust. "Stay," he groans. "Be mine, be mine, be mine, bemine, beminebeminebemine...." he mantras like he can't breathe. His hips are finally moving faster.

"Yours," you promise, "Yours, yours, yours." You've lost your mind, unable to even conjure why you were mad at him in the first place because this sweet haze was too thick to look through and it takes you a moment to realize it’s a slow orgasm releasing. It’s not overwhelming, it’s just hot and sticky. It has you stretching across the sheets. His teeth sink into your neck as you shake below him. He settles down when you begin your own mantra. Instead, he grinds deeply into you. You're only vaguely aware of the way you both grasp and tug each other closer.

It's not long after before he spills himself into you with a string of expletives. "I'm sorry," he whispers against your neck. It's so nice to feel his breath for once.

"Me too." And nothing else seemed to be needed for it. It's not long before he's rocking his hips and spill his own seed out around himself.

You kind of like his beskar in this instance. The room feels too hot and it's cool against you both. Yeah, you could get used to this. Maybe tomorrow you'll remember what you're supposed to be fighting about.

Taglist: 

@lxdyred​, and I promised to tag you in this, Ava, have some iffy smut. @buttercup--bee​

[morganaspendragonss]

turning page

After TK saves a patient’s life on a call, Tommy has a proposal for him.

i saw the promo photos for 2.06 and the summary for 2.07 and uhhh this happened? thanks to @immortalstrand and @laelipoo for poking me to do this and to @221tardisimpala for looking it over for me!

ao3 | 1.6k | season 2 speculation

“You handled yourself well out there today.”

TK jumps and swears, the new voice breaking him from his focus on his chores. He turns around, scowling, only for his eyes to blow wide as he spots Captain Vega watching him, her mouth twitching in amusement.

“Captain Vega,” he stammers. “Sorry, I didn’t realise it was you.”

She smiles and waves him off. “No, it was my fault for not giving you any warning. Though, as far as heart attacks go, it’s not a bad place to have one.”

He laughs awkwardly, and they trail off into an uncomfortable silence. TK scuffs the floor with his boot, not wanting to offend her by going back to work, but also not quite sure if the conversation is over. Fortunately, she quickly takes pity on him.

“I just wanted to say, thanks for stepping in earlier,” she says. “You did well.”

TK shrugs, tamping down the pride he feels at her words. “I was just doing my job.”

“I’d say you were doing a fair bit more than ‘just your job’.” Her eyebrows are raised and she takes a sip of her coffee, looking at him appraisingly. “Look, it’s no secret that I’ve had my...misgivings about Pearce. And after what happened today… Well, let’s just say that young woman is lucky you were there to help.”

“Anyone would have done the same,” TK deflects, though he’s not entirely sure why. “Marjan, or Paul, or…”

He trails off, flushing under her gaze. Captain Vega isn’t particularly intimidating, but there’s a distinct weight to this conversation that extends beyond simple praise. Not that the praise isn’t nice, but TK can tell it’s not what she came here to say, not truly. 

He clears his throat. “I’m sure Pearce will get there,” he offers. “But he’s only on trial, right? You’ll be able to find someone good if he, you know. Doesn’t.”

She levels him with a pointed gaze. “I think I already have.”

“Oh.” TK nods slowly. He’s got no idea why she’s telling him any of this; it seems more like a conversation for his dad, or literally anyone else that isn’t him. He tells her as much, surprised when she laughs and shakes her head. “What am I missing?”

She moves closer, TK inexplicably feeling more and more nervous with each passing second.

“You, TK,” she says, and his eyes widen. “I’m asking if you’d like to take the post.”

“Oh,” he repeats. “I, um. I -”

“You don’t have to give me an answer right away,” she interrupts. “I’d prefer it if you didn’t, actually. Take your time; you know where to find me.”

With a nod and an encouraging smile, Captain Vega turns to walk away. She gets as far as the staircase when TK calls after her, the question burning in his chest.

“Can I ask you something?” 

At her nod, TK hesitates a moment, biting his lip. “Why me?”

The question seems to surprise her. “Why not you?”

“I’m not the only one with medic training,” he points out. “And I’m sure you’ve had plenty of other applicants.”

“That’s all true,” Captain Vega accedes, walking back over to him. “But you are the best field medic we’ve got. You’re already integrated with the team; it’ll be a much easier adjustment than bringing someone entirely new in. And…” She hesitates, then places a hand on his arm. “I hope I’m not overstepping the line here, but I have to ask. Being a firefighter - who are you doing it for?”

TK shifts uncomfortably, his eyes flicking up to his dad’s office. It’s not an unfamiliar question - even though he decided to stay after the shooting, it’s been sitting at the back of his mind ever since, constantly niggling at him - but he hadn’t expected it, especially not from Captain Vega. She pats his arm sympathetically, then steps away, smiling gently.

“I’ll leave you to think about it,” she says. “I think you could do some really great work with us, TK, but if you truly don’t want the position, I won’t push. Let me know, okay?”

“I will.”

When she walks away this time, TK lets her go, staring after her retreating back long after she’s out of sight. He replays the conversation in his head, mind reeling at the implications of becoming a paramedic. It’s not an option he’s considered before, always too set on being a firefighter to think about anything else. And yet… Now that Captain Vega’s laid it out for him, it makes a frightening amount of sense. He could do it; he knows he could. 

Does he want to, though?

He doesn’t get time to think on it further as, for the second time in fifteen minutes, someone tries to give him a heart attack.

“What did Captain Vega want?” Marjan asks from behind him. 

Once he’s got his racing heart back under control, TK turns, shrugging. “Nothing. She was just thanking me for that call earlier.”

“Uh huh,” she says. “And that’s got you looking so constipated?”

“Shut up.” He scowls; Marjan grins. “Haven’t you got chores to do?”

“Haven’t you?” But she’s moving past him, playfully punching his shoulder as she goes. “Let us know if you ever feel like talking about what’s really eating you.”

“Yeah.”

*

TK chews on his nail, his other hand tapping an erratic rhythm on Carlos’s counter. He hasn’t been able to stop thinking about Captain Vega’s proposal, and the more he does so, the more he wonders about actually taking her up on it. 

From the sink, Carlos clears his throat. TK looks up, confused by the pointed look on his face.

“What?”

Carlos huffs a laugh. “First the pacing, now this. What’s going on?”

“It’s nothing,” he says on reflex. Then, at Carlos’s raised eyebrows, “Okay, it’s something.”

Carlos abandons the cooking, coming over to lean on the counter opposite TK. “Wanna talk about it?”

“We had a call today,” he starts. “There was a pretty serious medical situation, and the new paramedic we’ve got on trial - Pearce - was supposed to be helping Captain Vega. He choked. I had to step in and get the patient stabilised so she could be transported to hospital.”

“Good job you were there, then,” Carlos puts in, a small smile on his face.

TK returns it. “That’s what Captain Vega said,” he continues. “She came up to me near the end of shift, thanked me, and… She offered me the position, Carlos.”

“As paramedic?”

At TK’s nod, Carlos’s face breaks out into a huge grin. “That’s amazing!” His smile falters when TK meets his eyes, doubt written all over his face. “Unless… You don’t want it?”

TK shrugs hopelessly. “I have no idea. I think maybe I do? I just… Being a firefighter is all I’ve ever known. It’s not that taking this would mean I couldn’t do it anymore, I’m pretty sure I could work both sides, and I’d still be with the same team. Pretty much nothing would change, but right now, it feels like everything would. Do you know what I mean?”

He looks at Carlos desperately, grateful for the understanding he sees in his face. Carlos reaches across the counter and takes his hands.

“I do,” he says quietly. “But it also sounds like you have your answer.”

TK hesitates, then nods slowly, a small smile on his lips. Carlos is right - he knows exactly what he wants.

*

A few days later, he’s standing outside his dad’s office, nerves roiling in his stomach. His dad looks up before he can knock, looking startled at the sight of TK at the door.

“TK?”

He smiles awkwardly. “You got a minute, Cap?”

His dad looks up sharply, clearly noting the use of his title, but nods, gesturing to the seat opposite. “What’s up?” he asks when TK’s seated.

He purses his lips, twisting his hands in his lap. “Captain Vega spoke to me the other day,” he says. “I don’t know if she mentioned anything to you?”

His dad shakes his head, and TK nods. He focuses his gaze on the desk, not quite able to meet his dad’s eyes. “It was about the paramedic position.”

A silence falls between them, dragging out long enough for TK to dare to look up. He’s just in time to see the understanding dawn on his dad’s face.

“I see,” he says, voice carefully measured. “And what did you tell her?”

“Nothing yet,” TK replies. “But…”

“You want to say yes.”

“It’s not that I don’t love being a firefighter,” he says hurriedly. “I just. I think this could be good for me, you know? And I wouldn’t be going anywhere, and -”

“TK,” his dad cuts in. TK flushes and clears his throat, swallowing reflexively. His dad smiles encouragingly. “I told you before - whatever you choose, I’ll stand by you. Is this what you want?”

He nods. “Yeah.”

His dad sits back in his chair, holding his hands up. “Then what are you still doing talking to me?”

TK’s mouth drops open in surprise - he’s not sure why, but he’d expected more of a fight. A relieved laugh bubbles up in his chest, but he pushes it down as both he and his dad rise from their seats. They hug, TK briefly closing his eyes.

“Thanks, Dad,” he murmurs. His dad claps him on the back, eyes shining with pride when they separate. 

“Go on,” he says. “Tommy’s in her office.”

TK spares one glance backward as he leaves, feeling a hundred pounds lighter. He can hear the rest of the team chatting and laughing in the kitchen, and there’s a slight pang in his chest at the thought of breaking the news to them. 

But, as Captain Vega welcomes him into her office with a smile, TK knows that he’s making the right decision.

[houseof-harry]

Missed You Too | G.D.

Part 3 of Hate You Too!!

A/N - hello!!!!! part 3 of my hyt series!!! v proud of this part tbh, and dropping it at 2:30 am bc I can’t keep it to myself any longer. lots of love as always pretty pls lmk what you think!!! (read the last part here) (amazing gif by @vintagedolan​ as per usual nothing but the best by the best)

Word Count - 8.8k

Warnings - the nasty as per usual, mentions of not a great family life

“Why have you been trying more vegan stuff?” Kacey asks as you walk down the refrigerated aisle of the grocery store. You’d just put egg replacer in your cart after examining it for five minutes.

You shrug, looking at the various food options as you pass by them. “I don’t know, I’ve just been intrigued by it lately I guess.”

“Is the boy who gives you the glow vegan?” You roll your eyes, because this has been Kacey’s way of not so subtly poking around in your life to figure out who made you cry. She’s only seen one person make you cry: your dad. So the fact that a ‘random kid’ has seemed to do it for you, she’s pushing hard.

Because it wasn’t just that night that got to you, it’s been almost every day since. For almost a week straight, you’ve been moping around and going through the motions of life because the thought of Grayson truly hating you was making you really fucking sad. And that’s terrifying.

You had been pretty good about hiding it, you thought, until Kacey knocked asking why you were crying when you didn’t know she’d gotten home from Ethan’s one day. And now she needed to know what caused you your pain.

So you told her it was a random kid you’d been talking to. She didn’t believe you for a second (rightfully so, it was a terrible lie) and she wouldn’t leave it alone. You loved her and her passion, but sometimes you wish she’d let it go.

“I don’t know if he’s vegan or not. Everyone’s cutting out animal products more and more these days and I thought it’d be cool to try it myself. Is that such a problem?” You snap at her and she just huffs and pipes down for the time being.

You guys make it to the produce section after venturing through the various aisles in complete silence. You’re inspecting peppers when she speaks up again.

“You can’t hide him from me forever, you know.”

“You really think I can’t?”

“Y/N, come on.” She nudges you, making you meet her eyes and you see the genuine concern in them.

You let out a breath, picking your peppers and putting them in the cart. “I don’t even know what’s going on in my head with all the shit that’s happened, how am I supposed to tell you?”

She frowns wrapping her arm around you in a bit of an awkward side hug, the cart sandwiching you against the various vegetables.

“Maybe talking it out with me will help? When did it start? When did you meet him?”

You purse your lips, not sure how much you’re willing to reveal to her. Because if we’re being honest, Ethan is going to hear about this. And if they put two and two together, Grayson will soon know you’re having all these feelings over him and that’s the last thing you could want.

“I’m not supposed to like him, that was never what we were to each other. I don’t like him, I don’t think. Or I didn’t. But when I pissed him off and he left? I don’t know why, but it just-” You shrug, sighing and grabbing the cart to keep walking around as your emotions quickly bubbled to the surface after being hidden deep within you for so long.

“Isn’t that what they always say, though? Love comes when you’re not looking for it.”

“Oh jesus Kacey,” you laugh, pausing to grab some onions. “I’m not in love.”

“Hey,” she holds her hands up in defense as she watches you bag the onions. “All I’m saying is I’ve never seen you so into someone before. Even when you talk about your exes you have less emotion than with this guy.”

You toss the onions in the cart before continuing to push it along. “But I shouldn’t be into him. I wasn’t into him. I can’t tell if I’m blocking my feelings down and that’s why I’m confused or-”

“That’s definitely the problem,” she laughs as she picks out the fruits she wants for the week.

You huff in annoyance because you know she’s right, but you don’t want to let that be true. “Maybe I just really like his dick.”

The old lady next you scowls before shaking her head and walking away. You and Kacey giggle with each other as your cheeks blush a bit.

“I don’t think any dick is that powerful. Not when vibrators exist - fuck no. You’ve got the feelings glow.”

“Stop, Kacey,” you groan, halting your movements to look at her. She raises her brow at you and crosses her arms. “I don’t have the feelings glow. You get that shit for someone you’re gonna love. I could never love this guy, I-” you shake your head and blink a few times to quell any frustrated tears that have popped up. “I can’t love him. He was a good fuck. Is a good fuck. In fact-”

Before Kacey can react, you’re phone from your sweatshirt and typing away.

“Y/N what are you doing?”

“Proving that’s all he is.” You lock your phone with a satisfied grin.

“What the fuck did you just do?”

“Set up a dick appointment. A no strings attached, feelings-less dick appointment.”

“With the guy?” At this point you’re speedwalking the cart to the check out with Kacey trailing behind while she tries to process your rather reckless actions.

“With the guy,” you confirm.

“You’re gonna regret this,” she warns.

You sigh, locking your phone again after seeing his response.

“Maybe.”

***

“You’re in a shlump dude.”

Grayson was cuddled deep into their couch, blankets all around him and an almost completely empty pint of vegan ice cream he had picked up the night before.

Ethan had just come in from a midafternoon run, his sweaty and bare chest heaving as he stood in front of his brother with his hands on his hips. They were polar opposites right now, and Grayson hadn’t even realized. Not until Ethan’s comment makes him look down at himself and back up.

He merely sighs, leaning forward to put the ice cream on the coffee table while Ethan watches.

“Is it the new soulmate of the month?”

Grayson looks down at his phone, no new notifications on his blank lock screen. He doesn’t realize that he’s zoned out until Ethan’s snapping in his face with a questioning look.

Grayson shakes his head, groaning and rubbing his hand over his face.

“Bro, I don’t know.” Ethan sits next to him, leaning back as he drinks some water. “She’s not-” he huffs, doing his best to collect his thoughts because he truly has no idea how to explain you or his situation to Ethan without revealing that it’s you. Because as much as he loved his brother, he knew Kacey knew about everything in Ethan’s life. And Ethan’s life is Grayson’s life, and vise versa. So it would only be a matter of time before Kacey knew and then you’d know and he had no idea how you’d react to him having any type of positive feelings towards you.

“Who is she?”

“You don’t know her,” Grayson is quick to respond, almost too quick, but luckily Ethan doesn’t push it.

“What’s so special about her that she has you eating ice cream on a Friday?”

Grayson looks at the sweet dessert resting on the table with a disgusted look, only realizing now that he feels bloated and definitely indulged a bit too much.

“I don’t know, dude. She’s not like anyone I’ve ever talked to or dated which is why I’m fucking confused. I shouldn’t like her.”

Ethan laughs, shaking his head. “You’re a fucking idiot.”

“Why?”

“Because,” he picks up the ice cream and takes a spoonful into his mouth himself. “There’s a reason why you’re not with anyone you’ve talked to or dated in the past. And there’s a reason why someone so different from those girls is making you feel a lot more. Grow the fuck up and actually ask her out so you can stop being so damn mopey.”

Grayson looks at his brother, processing his words slowly as Ethan continues to finish off the ice cream. He knows Ethan is right. But you’re not into that, and definitely not into him like that.

“She would never date me,” Grayson huffs as he leans further back into the couch.

“You won’t know until you ask.”

Grayson can feel the nerves bubbling in his stomach at the idea of asking you to be anything more than friends. Were you even friends? Just someone you fucked occasionally but wouldn’t even let him kiss you slowly?

He’s pulled out of his thoughts by his phone vibrating, and he’s surprised to see your name attached to a new text.

sorry about last time. are you free tonight?

He reads the text over and over, trying to take it all in.

He’s never heard you apologize to him. Literally never. Not that you’ve done anything terrible, but you guys just didn’t do that unless there was underlying sarcasm beneath the words.

And the fact you wanted to see him again? Try again? Maybe Ethan was right. Or, you were horny as shit. But he’d take what he could get.

“Is it her?”

Grayson snaps his head up at Ethan, his cheeks a bit more flushes than before due to the fact he was now thinking about what you wanted to do tonight.

He nods, looking back down at his phone. “Yeah, she wants to hang out tonight.”

“Kacey’s coming over for the night and we already call the pool, so I don’t know what-”

“I’ll go to hers.”

“Okay.” Ethan stands with the empty ice cream pint in his hand. “Don’t forget to ask her out, though. Even if it’s a double date with me and K, to make it more comfortable for you guys.”

Grayson chuckles to himself because, realistically, you guys going on a double date together would probably be a lot of fun. If you and Grayson didn’t fight.

“I’d rather just be a fuck to her than nothing.”

Ethan sighs, shaking his head. “Whatever, dude. That isn’t good for you, but I know you’re not gonna listen to me.” And with that, he’s walking to the kitchen.

Grayson closes his eyes for a moment, taking a few deep breaths because Ethan was right again, but you’re just so...addicting. As much as he thinks you’d be amazing together if you were both willing to put your bruised egos aside, he can’t get the taste of your lips, your skin, your pussy out of his mind. Or the way you looked totally fucked out for him the first time you let him touch you. Or how breathless you were in the pool. He felt like he needed that, and if it meant some hurt feelings on his end, he’d take any fix he could get.

yeah, i’ll come by after Kacey gets here

***

Grayson was rather proud of the way he so easily slipped past Ethan and Kacey, grateful for his brother’s willingness to be vague so that he could get out without any questions. Because if there’s one person besides Ethan who will lecture Grayson, it would be Kacey. And she would definitely not approve of what was about to happen.

The drive felt longer this time. He had his hype playlist going, the one he listened to when he ran, trying to get some adrenaline pumping because confidence usually followed. And he really needed confidence right now.

You were going through the same routine as last time. Preparing your space for him, and more importantly preparing your mind. Trying not to psych yourself out while also trying to guess if he’d want it all gentle like last time, or if he’d be even more pissed because of what happened.

When you hear a knock at your front door you jump a bit, the moment of anticipation finally here. You wipe your sweaty palms on your shorts, walking to the door and taking a breath before swinging it open.

You both look at each other for a moment, and you can tell something has changed since the last time you saw him. He looked a bit paler, more tired, his hair not styled like normal. His posture was relaxed, his back slouched and hands in his pockets as he looked straight at you. Because sure, those were all little tells as to how the past week has treated him, but when you finally meet his gaze it feels like his eyes tell the whole story. You weren’t sure why or how, but you just knew he’d been through it the past week.

That made you feel a bit relieved, that you weren’t the only confused one. That is, if his rough week was in any relation to you. Or it could have been something with Ethan, or the company, or YouTube, or another girl. Maybe you weren’t the only one texting him about fucking around, and you weren’t the only one-

“Am I gonna get let in or did you invite me here to stand outside?”

You bite your lip, coming back to reality quickly and stepping aside so he can walk past you. You can smell his stupid signiture scent, the one you’d fake sneeze at just to tease him whenever he put on too much. The thought makes you smile, because it would always make him so annoyed. His face would scrunch, he’d toss his hands up like you’d just insulted his mother, and he’d throw at least a ten minute shit fit. It always worked without a doubt.

“Dude, are you good?” You’re pulled out of your trance to see him walking backwards towards your bedroom, an eyebrow raised as you still stand holding the door open. “Thought I was gonna get an apology or something, not just the fucking draft from the hallway.” The cockiness in his voice feels familiar, and almost makes you warm inside. But your inner competitiveness takes over first.

“Oh, you expected more than a ‘I’m sorry’? What makes you think you deserve that?” You chuckle, closing the door and locking it before walking to him.

He shrugs a cocky smirk on his face. “I usually accept apologies in acts of service. Never said I accepted yours yet.”

You put your hands on his stomach, pushing him through the doorway and closer to your bed. “Something tells me you will,” you whisper, your mouth right next to his ear as you lean in. You have a tight grip on his shirt where your hands were resting, his knees at the back of the bed.

He swallows thickly at your response, his own hands coming to grip your hips and bring you flush against him.

“Yeah? Gonna prove you’re really sorry, Y/N?”

You’re not sure if it’s the hushed tone or the fact he said your name that makes you freeze, your need to be in charge leaving you as you move your head to look up at him. He’d only ever said your name when he was pissed at you, when he was being sarcastic. Hearing it fall from his lips now, made a shiver run down your spine.

Grayson can clearly see how much he just affected you, and he plops down onto your bed victoriously as he watches you try to get your shit together. His arms are behind him so he can recline back to continue to watch you, his legs spread a bit and his dick clearly outlined in his sweats. You’re 90% sure he’s not wearing anything underneath, and the thought makes the hairs on the back of your neck stand up.

He expects you to climb into his lap, so when you’re falling to your knees between his legs, his confidence wavers for a moment. “Oh shit,” he mumbles under his breath, and you’re sure he didn’t intend for you to hear it.

You lick your lips, sliding your hands slowly up his thighs as you watch him try and collect himself. He can’t decide if watching your hands or your face is better, his gaze constantly switching back and forth.

You, however, hold your eyes steady on his cock that is twitching underneath the confines of his sweats. You’re not sure how long you’re gonna be able to tease him, your mouth literally watering at the thought of finally tasting him, making him feel good that way. Letting him blow his load down your throat.

Your hands reach the hem of his sweats, and you bring one of your thumbs to rub over his cock. You hear him suck a breath in, your eyes finally lifting to meet his. He’s got his bottom lip between his teeth, his face barely lit up from the few candles in your room.  His nostrils are flaring with every breath he lets out, the anticipation clear in the way his eyes are now jumping around your own face as he waits for your next move.

You dig your fingers into the hem of his sweats, pulling them down as he lifts his hips to make it easier for you, Once they’re around his ankles, you let your eyes fall to his hard cock against his lower stomach. You take in every vein you can see, trailing all the way up to his red tip. You could tell it was borderline painful with the way his thighs clenched under your hands. When you noticed the precum beginning to drip from his tip you can’t resist anymore, leaning in to lick it all up.

“Fuck, Y/N.”

There it is again. Your name so gracefully falling from his lips. You feel a wave of nervous energy flow through you, but not before the words go straight to your pussy. You’ve suddenly made it your mission to make him say your name as many times as possible tonight.

You grab him at his base, swirling your tongue around his tip and making sure to pay extra attention to his slit, noting his little twitch every time your tongue runs over the most sensitive part of him. He brings one of his hands to the side of your head, gripping the ponytail you’d already had in your hair in preparation.

You look up at him as you continue to explore what makes him pull tight against your scalp, his cocky smirk back again as he takes in his new view.

“Loving the taste of my cock?”

You let go of him for a moment, and you feel him tug on your hair a bit harder in protest, but before he can say anything else you’re leaning down farther to drag your tongue from his base all the way back up, swirling your tongue around once like earlier before sitting back on your heels. You lick your lips slowly, never breaking eye contact.

“It’s alright.”

He rolls his eyes, putting a bit of pressure on the back of your head to try and bring you closer to him again.

You chuckle, leaning forward so that when you speak again he feels your hot breath on the sensitive skin. “Why? Love the way my mouth feels?”

“I wouldn’t know because you haven’t actually fucking put it-”

Before he can even finish his sentence your mouth is surrounding him, slowly sink down until he’s hitting the back of your throat. You stay there a moment, listening to his quicker breathing and watching his stomach clench as you hollow your cheeks and leisurely drag your head up, letting your tongue trace the vein that runs on the underside of his cock.

You lift your mouth from him, a small trail of saliva still connecting your lower lip to his tip.

“How about now?”

He looks down at you for a second, total silence ringing through your room. If you weren’t so turned on and confused about your feelings, you’d be more sure about the blatant admiration and attraction you see in his gaze right now.

He moves his hand from your head to your face, his thumb wiping your bottom lip to clean it before grabbing your cheeks and forcing you to continue looking at him. “You’re not good for me.”

Before you can even question what he means, he’s forcing you to stand up. He brings your face to his, and your hands fly around for a moment as you try to keep your balance with his quick and forceful motions before they finally land on his shoulders, his lips hot and heavy on yours. He didn’t seem to mind the fact he could taste himself on your tongue, too eager to feel your mouth on his.

The way he is able to get you to move at just the feeling of his hands on your body is almost embarrassing, but when his hands come to your hips to move you so that you’re now sitting next to where he was as he awkwardly shuffles to get between your legs you’re not even surprised with how smooth he made it all seem. It almost felt like you guys worked well together.

He doesn’t even bother to step out of his sweats, only throwing his shirt over his head when he feels your hands tugging on it. His hand pushes at your shoulder so that you’re laying back, legs still hanging over the edge of the bed. He makes quick work of your shorts and underwear, letting you kick them off as he brings a large hand to pull your tank top down just enough so that your tits are out. You’re sure you heard some of the seams rip, but at this point you couldn’t care less.

He reaches below your knees, pulling your legs up forcefully so that they’re bent, your heels now resting on the edge of the bed and your pussy spread wide for him.

“Condom, Gray.” You nudge him with your knee to pull him out of the slight daze he’d been in since he last spoke, and his eyes clear up after he blinks and comes back to reality for a moment.

“Oh - right. Where…” He trails off, looking around the room to see if you had any out and available for him.

You lean up on your elbow, pointing to your nightstand. “Back right of the drawer.”

He leans over, not moving from his spot between your legs. You watch him rummage through the drawer and think about how natural it feels to have him there, going through your shit.

He’s quick to pull out a condom, not even closing the drawer before tearing it open with his teeth and rolling it on himself.

You open your mouth to say something, but before you can he pushes your thighs back enough for your feet to rise off the bed, his hands sliding up the backs of your legs to slowly extend them upwards. By the time his touch reaches your midcalf, you can feel the ridges of his stomach on the back of your thighs, your calves resting on his pecs. One of his hands goes back down your legs to tightly grip your thigh, the other going to his cock to line his dick up with your entrance.

His eyes leave your center for a moment, going back to your face. “Good?”

You nod, biting your lip in anticipation. Right as you feel his tip against you, about to push in you remember what you were going to say before. “Wait!” He looks up in alarm, raising his eyebrow at you in question, slight concern on his face.

“Is my apology accepted?”

His face relaxes as he chuckles lightly, leaning down a bit to hover over your body. You feel his dick back at your entrance, and you finally feel the way he slowly begins to fill you. Your body relaxes at the immediate satisfaction, your walls taking every inch of his cock as he works his way to fill you up completely.

Only when you can feel his hips against you does he speak up again. “I guess so.”

You let yourself fall flat on your back, a smile on your face as he smirks at you. He grabs your other thigh with the hand that helped him, digging his fingers into the flesh there as if to brace you.

He pulls back out of you slowly, brushing your g-spot while doing so. You let out a soft hum at the feeling, anticipation for what he’s about to do crawling through your body and causing even more wetness to come out of you and around his cock.

He opens his mouth to say something when he pauses his hips, staying totally still for a second. You wait for him to speak, but nothing ever comes. As you’re about to ask him about it, he cuts you off with the quick movements of his hips as he starts to pick up a fast pace in and out of you.

He’s got his lip between his teeth in concentration, the veins in his neck and arms sticking out with the force he’s using to hold you against him while he pounds into you. You let your mouth fall open while you close your eyes, the feeling already so good you can’t speak. You grip the sheets tightly in your hands, doing what you can to stay close to him despite the force of his hips continuously pushing you away. You can feel your tits moving with his motions, and you’re sure if you were to open your eyes, that’s where his gaze would be locked. Even before you’d fucked that’s where you’d catch him looking if he thought you weren’t paying attention.

“Such a nice pussy, shit,” he moans.

A whimper comes from the back of your throat and you open your eyes when you feel his lips against your leg. At first his touch is soft there, light kisses despite the hard and fast movements of his hips. But soon he’s nipping at your skin, almost like he’s using you as a way to quiet himself.

That’s not what you want, though. You want him moaning, whimpering, saying your name. So you do the one thing you know will get to him.

You clench your walls tightly around him, and it instantly changes the game for both of you. As you continuously clench and release, you can feel him press tighter against your walls. The pressure on your g-spot causes pleasure to shoot from your core to your whole body, and you moan loudly as his hips stutter.

“Y/N - fuck - keep doing that,” he practically begs, leaning further over you and bending you in ways you didn’t even think possible. You’re sure you’ll feel it tomorrow, but you don’t even care. Especially not when your name sounds that good when he’s moaning it.

So you listen to him, and soon you can feel the sweat gather along your hairline as your orgasm slowly creeps through your body. It feels good having him on top of you, gripping you, so deep inside of you.

He’s panting above you, and you can see how far gone he is, too. So you decide to act before you think, forcing your fingers under his that are gripping your thighs, making him hold your hands. His eyes meet yours to make sure you knew what you were doing, but he never fought you. If anything, he started grinding his hips into your more, making sure to reach any spot that went untouched.

He lets go of one of your hands, causing you to pout for a moment. But your lips are quickly turning into an o as you feel his thumb rub your clit.

“Shit, Gray,” you whine, digging your nails into his palms.

He grunts, and you’re pretty sure his lip will be bleeding once he finally releases it.

Before you can get too concerned with it, however, you feel your orgasm quickly coming from the pleasure coursing through your veins.

“I’m gonna cum,” you warn him, and it comes out much breathier than you intended.

“I got you, let go baby,” he huffs out.

Baby. Suddenly you had a new favorite to hearing your name from his lips.

And that’s what pushes you over the edge, your back arching as you finally fall over the edge, pleasure taking over your entire body as you moan out over and over again how good you feel to him. You’re not even sure what you’re saying and if it makes sense but you don’t care. You feel too good to care.

You can feel him finishing in the condom once you feel a bit more connected to reality, his grip on your hand almost painful as he pushes his hips into you one final time before resting there and halting all his movements.

You try to regulate your breathing as he comes down from his own high, his eyes closed. You take the time to admire him, watching his bulging arms and defined chest continue to tense with the pleasure he’s trying to recover from.

Once he opens his eyes, he moves to stand up completely again. He lets go of your hand, and you can’t ignore the slight pang of sadness that shoots through you when you feel the coldness of the air against your palm.

He throws the condom out in the trash next to your bed before looking down at you. You stay in silence for a minute, both of you unsure what to do now.

“I should probably go, right?” He asks, and you’re not sure if it’s your post orgasm glow or the sadness you feel at the idea of him leaving that makes you think he’s almost asking just to make sure he can stay. But you’re sure that’s not what he means.

“Yeah, probably,” you mumble as he leans over to pull his pants up. Once he’s done that and begins to put his shirt back on, you sit up to watch him move around the room.

Only when he grabs his phone and keys does he look at you again.

“Nice fucking you,” he says, nodding his chin as a way of saying goodbye before leaving your room.

Exactly what you thought, just a nice fuck.

***

You were sure if you got hit by an 18 wheeler you’d probably feel and look better than you did right now.

Seeing your family was never easy, and on top of the exhaustion of avoiding Grayson like the plague? You were done.

It had been six weeks since you’d last seen him, heard his voice, said anything mean about him. Because you haven’t even had the opportunity.

After the last time you fucked, neither of you reached out. You continued to avoid seeing him, and him you, because what were you gonna say? Suddenly I don’t hate you, I definitely like you, I wanted you to stay, and I wanted to spend time with you? Absolutely not. Not when you were so sure he’d laugh in your face and make your life miserable every time you were forced to be in a room together.

So you went a full 6 weeks without Grayson Dolan.

The first two weeks were okay, because you’d done that many times. Two weeks without him was easy, manageable. But at the beginning of week 3 when you heard Ethan telling Kacey how Grayson refused to come around when he knew you’d be there? That’s when you felt yourself break.

You didn’t even try and hide it from Kacey this time, letting her hold you when you cried. Which was a lot, because apparently pushing your feelings to the pits of hell for this long made shit a lot harder when they finally resurfaced. The last three weeks were spent in self pity parties, ice cream, movies and wine. And tears. Lots of tears.

It was safe to say you were not doing too hot, and your family never helped. So you left your parents’ house early, and were looking forward to spending the night with Kacey chilling out and not having to worry about anyone else in your life. The long trip back to your cozy apartment didn’t help, either. It gave you too much time to overthink the things that constantly seemed to take over your mind, so by the time you were opening your door there were tears filling your eyes and you could feel your lower lip begin to quiver.

“Surprise Kace! My dad’s still a fucking piece of shit, so I came home a day early,” you meakly call through the apartment, taking your shoes off as you’re met with silence besides the TV.

“K? Can we get McDonalds? It’ll help me-”

Your bag falls out of your hand as four pairs of eyes meet your hunched over, weak figure when you turn around on the hunt for your roommate. Kacey was cuddled to Ethan on the couch, and Ryan and Grayson sat on the floor by the coffee table that had half empty chinese food containers spread across it.

“Oh.”

“Hun what happened? Are you okay?” Kacey stands as she talks to you, her eyes softening and you do everything you can to keep your gaze locked on her. You can feel Grayson’s eyes burning into your face, and it’s only making you want to cry more.

“It’s fine, I’m fine,” you lie, your voice cracking as you do your best to put a small smile on your face. They can all clearly see through it, but you’re grateful none of them push it.

“You want some chinese?” Kacey offers once she finally meets you, putting her hands on your arms almost to steady you even though you weren’t swaying.

You look over her shoulder and to the food on the table and for a second your eyes meet Grayson’s. They looked sad, sad for you. And that’s the last thing you wanted.

You look back at Kacey, shaking your head. “I’m good. Gonna shower anyways.”

You move away from her, grabbing your bag and walking down the hallway. You don’t even bother dropping anything in your room first, heading to the bathroom and shutting the door. It’s moments like this where you wish you and Kacey had gone a little nicer on your apartment, because your broken bathroom lock is staring at you right in the face as you pray everyone respects your privacy.

You turn on the shower to let it heat up, but the minute you see yourself in the mirror, the tears begin to fall. You just hoped the sound of the water drowned out your quiet sobs as you gripped the counter to try and keep yourself steady.

“Is she gonna be okay?” Ethan asks as Kacey comes to sit back down with a frown on her lips.

She nods, sighing. “Yeah, she just hates talking about that stuff with anyone. Hell, I barely know anything, just that she had it kind of rough growing up and she’s still pretty fucked up for it. She usually needs a few days to recuperate from a good visit to her family, so I’m surprised she was able to get through the living room without crying.”

The three guys take in the new information in silence, Ethan wrapping his arm around Kacey to keep her close to him.

Grayson stands, wiping his hands on his shorts. Ethan raises a brow at him in question, while Kacey and Ryan simply watch his movements.

“I have to pee.”

“We only have one bathroom, Gray,” Kacey reminds him.

“I know.”

He turns and walks to the hallway you disappeared down just a few minutes before.

“Grayson,” Kacey calls to him, making him turn to look at her.

She gives him a do you have any idea what you’re doing? look.

His lips tighten as he gives her a curt nod before turning back and walking up to the bathroom door. He knocks gently, putting his ear close to the wood to try and hear you behind it.

The sound makes you jump as you sniffle and quickly wipe your nose. “Kacey, listen. I know you’re worried, but I really just need a shower first.”

Your voice is thick, and it’s obvious to Grayson that you’d been crying. It breaks his heart a bit, as confusing as it is for him. Is that what you sounded like if he had made you cry?

“It’s me.”

The second you hear his voice your whole body tenses as you lift your head to look at yourself in the mirror again. Your eyes are red and puffy, your nose irritated and your lips swollen. You somehow looked ten times worse than when you first walked in the door, and you had little interest in letting Grayson in.

“Y/N.”

You sigh, closing your eyes and letting your head fall back down. “What?”

“I gotta pee.”

You scoff, and the familiar anger you hadn’t felt for almost 6 weeks weeks boils right back up in you. You hate to admit it, but it felt good to feel something normal, something other than sadness even if it’s just for a moment.

You swing the door open standing almost chest to chest with the man who has haunted you for way too long now.

“I’m going to take a fucking shower first. Then you can pee.” You sound way less angry than normal, much less of a bite to your words.

His face is soft as he takes in your appearance, his body blocking you into the bathroom without an escape.

“It’s an emergency.”

It’s clearly not, and by the tone of his voice you’re not even sure he has to pee at all. He’s casual, calm even, besides the worry on his face.

You groan and sniffle, rolling your eyes before turning and walking farther into the room. “Can you at least let me get in first?”

He steps into the tiny room with you, closing the door behind him. “Sure.”

“Without you in here.”

He rolls his eyes, crossing his arms over his chest. “I’ve already seen it all. Get in the shower so I can pee.”

“Turn around,” you whine, and he can tell your patience is running thin. You’re grateful he doesn’t push you farther, his body turning so his back is to you. You’re quick to strip yourself of your clothes, opening the curtain and stepping in.

“I can’t believe you couldn’t wait ten minutes to fucking pee,” you complain, grabbing your shampoo.

You hear Grayson move around outside the shower.

“If you’re gonna complain about me at least do it to my face so I’m not talking to a damn curtain like an idiot.”

You pull the curtain back so that your head can pop out to see he is sat on the now closed toilet seat.

“Fucking dick, didn’t even need to take a piss. Why do you have this incessant need to bother me all the time?” You throw the curtain back into place, beginning to wash your hair as you do your best to control your breathing. You can feel the tears that still threaten to spill start to well up in your eyes, but you’ll be damned if you’re caught crying by Grayson Dolan.

“You make it fun,” he chuckles out.

You bite your lip, pausing your movements to prevent any tears from falling. You’re unsuccessful, feeling a few fall down your cheeks before you can stop them, but the water washes them away quickly. You take some deep breaths, washing the shampoo from your hair to try and calm down a bit. You didn’t like how your anger at Grayson was making you sad now, too.

“Y/N?” He taps on the curtain, causing you to jump and gasp. Your hand comes to your chest to cover your heart that was already beating fast.

“What?” You snap.

“I went 6 weeks without talking to you, I’m not leaving until you fucking say something back.”

You huff, and honestly consider sitting on the floor because of your lack of energy. “What do you want me to fucking say, Grayson?”

“I don’t know,” he sighs, and you can hear him get up and pace. “That you hate me, that you think I’m annoying and rude and narcissistic and that I’m dense or whatever the fuck you feel like I am today! Just fucking call me something, say something.”

“Well, I don’t have the energy to fight your dumbass right now, so either pee or leave.”

Grayson smiles to himself at the name you still managed to throw in there, but it quickly falls when he hears a tiny sniffle from you.

You don’t hear anything from him for a minute, and you begin to assume that he had managed to sneak out without you knowing.

So you condition your hair, letting the tears roll down your face again as your ears begin to ring from how overwhelming everything has been the past day, weekend, months. You can barely keep your surroundings clear in your mind with everything racing through it.

Which is why when the curtain is suddenly being thrown back and a naked Grayson is stepping in the shower with you, you almost scream bloody murder before he covers your mouth and grabs your hip to keep you from stumbling backwards.

You relax at his touch, realizing you’re not going to get murdered (watching Criminal Minds was probably not the best idea when you’re so high stress at the moment). He removes his hand and you frown immediately.

“Why the hell are you in my shower with me?”

“Because you won’t talk!” At this point you can see how distressed he is, the wrinkles around his eyes more pronounced than normal and his bags darker than normal. It’s really the first time you’ve had to consider how much you guys not talking could have weighed on him. You assumed he would find a new girl and move on, while you made Kacey practically babysit you. It never crossed your mind that he would have felt even similarly to you.

“I have nothing to say to you.”

You can see how your words cut deep instantly, and you regret saying them. Especially because it’s not true, you’re finding yourself wanting nothing more than for him to stay right now and talk to you. To comfort you.

“So then tell me what happened six weeks ago that changed shit. Or tell me what happened with your dad. Or just fucking tell me something,” he pleads weakly.

You wrap your arms around his torso, pulling him flush against your wet body. You rest your head on his chest and close your eyes while one of his large hands caresses your back, the other coming up to stroke your hair.

You guys stand like that for a while, your sense of time totally thrown off. It could have been two minutes or two hours, you didn't know. But he stayed there holding you, keeping you close to him.

“I really wanna tell you about my dad, but I can’t right now,” you mumble out.

His muscles tense for a moment at the sound of your scratchy voice before he continues to rub your back.

“You don’t have to. Are you physically okay?” You nod, your cheek rubbing against his now wet chest. “Yeah. It’s just really hard to say out loud, and I need to process it before I tell someone.”

“That’s okay.” He leans down to leave a few gentle kisses along your hairline.

“But know that when I do tell you it’ll make more sense why I hated you. And why it’s hard for me to trust you. And why I avoided you for so long. It’s not an excuse, but know I don’t like being this way.”

He tightens his arms around you, resting his cheek on top of your head. “I don’t think I was very helpful to the cause, either.”

You chuckle, cuddling further into him. “I should probably finish showering.”

He lets go of you with that, holding you by your shoulders instead. “Want help?”

You laugh, shaking your head. “No, I know how to wash my own body. Plus, you don’t get to touch my tits yet.”

He pouts, letting his gaze fall to them. “Why not?”

“Because I’m still mad at you for lying about having to pee.” You put your hands on his chest, nudging him backwards a bit.

“Hey - hey, wait a second.” He grabs your wrists to stop your movements, pulling you back to him easily.

You both have stupid grins on your face, unable to contain the new feelings rushing through the both of you. Well, not new. But you were allowing yourself to finally feel them without covering them with anger.

He leans in closer to you, finally letting his lips touch yours for what feels like the first time. Yes, you’ve kissed before, and it was electric every time. But this? This was a whole new level.

His lips were soft and meaningful against yours, his movements well thought out as he did his best to portray everything he couldn’t verbally with the way his lips fit so perfectly with yours. You felt butterflies in your stomach from how slow and sensual he was being, and you felt like you could melt right into him because of it.

Once he was satisfied, he grabbed the back of your head to keep you steady while he pecked a few quick kisses against your lips, making you smile against him. He only pulled away when you were both giggling.

“I guess I’ll leave you to finish your shower, then.”

You bit your lip, nodding your head. “Yeah. But can you do two things for me?”

He smiles and nods eagerly.

You giggle, putting a hand on his hip to start guiding him out of the shower. “Can you kick everyone out? And then sit on the toilet to keep me company?”

He smirks, stepping out of the tub. “What if I actually have to pee now?”

“So then fucking pee but don’t flush. I’m more concerned with getting everyone out.”

“Not gonna be able to contain how loud you’ll be when you finally let me touch you?”

“Oh my god,” you roll your eyes. “You make it so hard to not wanna make fun of everything you say.”

“Hey, I’d rather you make fun of me every day than not talk to me at all,” he admits, his tone still joking but you can tell he’s serious.

You feel your cheeks blush as your chest swells, so you close the curtain to continue showering. “Get everyone out, you cocky, horny, dickhead.”

He laughs, grabbing a towel from the rack hanging next to him. “There she is,” he mumbles to himself, but you hear and feel your blush deepen further.

He walks to the door and opens it, walking the few feet it takes to reach where everyone was still anxiously waiting.

“Everything’s under control here. You guys gotta head out, though.”

Kacey looks at him in shock, taking in his almost naked, completely wet body as she pieces everything together with a look of confusion on her face.

“Do you have a fucking UTI or some shit?” Ethan laughs while his eyes are still on his phone before he also looks up at him, his phone falling out of his hands and into his lap. “Dude what the fuck?”

“I think we should go,” Ryan chimes in, standing up and clearing the containers from the coffee table.

“Grayson, what’s happening?” Kacey stands, concern still written all over her face. She walks up to him quickly, pointing a finger at him. “Did you take advantage of her? Grayson, she’s hurt! What the-”

Grayson easily grabs the hand that her pointed finger is attached to as he rolls his eyes. “No, Kacey. I talked to her. Comforted her, made her feel better.” Kacey raises her eyebrows at the last comment which makes Grayson groan. “Not like that. Made her heart feel better. I’ll tell her to text you when she’s feeling up to it for you to come home for her to explain, but please leave. She asked me to get you guys out.”

Her face softens at that as she looks over his shoulder at the open bathroom door.

“Y/N!” She calls loud enough for you to hear over the running water.

“Yeah?” Your voice is muffled but she can hear you’re less emotional than when you walked in the door. This makes her relax a bit.

“You want us out?”

“Yes please!”

That seems to satisfy her, as she backs away from Grayson slowly. “I can’t believe it,” she mumbles under her breath, shaking her head as she grabs her phone.

“Bro what is going on?” Ethan stands, looking at his brother for answers.

“Please,” Grayson practically begs. “Please leave and we can talk about it all later.”

“Yeah something tells me we don’t want to be around for when Y/N gets out of the shower,” Ryan adds as he gets his own stuff ready to go.

“Why are you so chill right now?” Ethan asks him.

Ryan shrugs, looking to Grayson for a moment.

“You got this?” Grayson asks.

Ryan nods, and Grayson turns quickly to make it back to the bathroom, back to you.

When the door shuts both Kacey and Ethan look directly at Ryan.

“Did you know about this? What the fuck is happening?” Ethan asks him as Ryan ushers them both to the front door.

“It’s not my place to tell you guys. But we definitely want to leave them alone.”

The two both continue to pester Ryan while they leave, and Grayson lets out a sigh of relief once he hears quiet outside from his place on the toilet.

“They’re gone,” he mumbles, rubbing his hands on the towel still wrapped around his waist.

“Hmm, suddenly I think I need a two hour shower.”

He groans, leaning back and hissing at the cold porcelain against his skin. “I’ll get back in with you.”

“You’re not invited,” you laugh, and Grayson laughs with you.

You’re quick to finish washing your body, itching to be out there with Grayson again. He sits there in a daze, replaying the sound of your laugh in his head on repeat and wondering how he went so long without it. And how much he regrets not being the source of it more often.

When you shut the water off, Grayson sits up giddily as he waits for you to finally get out. Somehow your time away from him now feels longer than the six weeks prior.

Your reach for your towel, lazily drying off because something told you there wouldn’t be many clothes in your near future. When you step out, towel held up to your front, Grayson is watching you with nothing but admiration on his face.

“What?”

He shakes his head, his smile so wide his cheeks hurt but he didn’t care. “Nothing. Just missed you.”

You giggle, going to straddle his thighs and sit on his lap, your towel barely covering you still. He grabs the back of your bare upper thighs to keep you steady as your free hand rests on his shoulder.

“You were literally sitting out here for, like, two minutes alone while I finished showering.”

He shakes his head chuckling, his gaze falling from your face to where you held the towel against your body as a rare feeling took over: shyness. It’s hard to make Grayson Dolan shy, to make him blush, but you’ve managed to do it.

“I meant the month and a half we didn’t see each other, but then too.” He shrugs as his thoughts run a mile a minute. “Fuck.” He laughs louder as he finally lets his eyes meet yours again.

“What now?”

“I’m feeling all...soft and shit. I don’t know. I’m not used to it.”

“Wow, I’m amazing. The girl to make the asshole who is Grayson Dolan soft for five minutes.”

“Yeah, let’s go with just five minutes,” he grunts as he stands, keeping his strong hold around you to keep you in his arms.

You laugh, pulling your chest against his as you wrap your arms around his neck to keep yourself steady in his grip.

“Oh, and for the record,” you say while playing with the short hairs at the back of his neck as he does his best to maneuver to your room while looking at you. “I missed you too.”

Tags: @spideysimpossiblegirl​

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