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goatsandgangsters · 4 years ago

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okay okay okay EPISODE 6. I’m still… out of fucking breath. from the last one.

I didn’t plan on live-blogging because then I’d have to keep pausing to type but actually I’m having too much fun, I guess I’m liveblogging now

my posts just keep getting longer and more and more incomprehensible

I forgot to mention in my last one, but it was a really good call to include the whole “west ravka wants to secede” plot line. it adds a lot, politically, and also adds a sense of urgency. whereas the book is a little bit like, the darkling is kind of a dumbass if you think about it because ALL HE HAD TO DO WAS WAIT LIKE 50 MORE YEARS, WHICH IS NOTHING IN THE GRAND SCHEME OF THINGS, but now there’s definitely like. political urgency and necessity that the books don’t convey to the same degree.

also adds a lot of dimension to What Happens At The End of The Book. which, I’m not there yet, episode-wise. but liiiiiiiiike.

BEN! BARNES! HAS! THE! RANGE! oh I love that they let him be lovesick and terrifying back-to-back like this, god he’s so fucking good. like, we all knew? we all knew this was a stroke of absolute casting genius? but god I don’t think we were actually capable of realizing To What Degree

oh god Inej looking at Alina I’m gonna CRY I actually got teary-eyed??

poor fedyor. he was planning so many double dates and then darklina had to go and breakup. (side note: I am SO INTRIGUED that the darkling thinks ivan is hilarious, so I just think the two “grumpy one/sunshine one” couples should go on a double date. get ravkan ice cream. why can’t this family ever have a funky fresh good time)

“I’ll never let go, helvar”

yo, real talk, why’s the darkling’s bed so short. dOES HE SLEEP WITH HIS LEGS DANGLING OFF THE END. this furniture is absolutely not proportionate to his height at all.

also it’s interesting how often he calls her “miss starkov” instead of alina, considering in the book he’s like “hello alina, how are you alina, alina how is alina today, alina I’ve seen what you truly are alina, FINE alina MAKE alina ME alina YOUR alina.” I’m pretty sure when I first read shadow and bone, literally the only reason I learned alina’s name is because he kept saying it

FASCINATING, CANON ZOYA/DARKLING???????????? honestly don’t know if I like that??? I prefer to think that he has not gotten laid in a couple hundred years because he’s just bad at being a person and isn’t actually as slick as he thinks he is. I cannot believe they un-canoned Zoya/Mal and canon’d this, UNEXPECTED. feels weird.

on the plus side, I genuinely want a polycule of a solid half the trilogy characters and I guess it’s getting more canon by the minute! this is zoya and her girlfriend alina and alina’s three boyfriends mal, darkling comma the, and nikolai, who are also or have been zoya’s boyfriends at one point or another plus alina’s girlfriend genya who is also zoya’s girlfriend genya and genya’s boyfriend david” I’m allowed a seven-person polyship right?

fedyor and ivan go on double dates with the seven-person polycule. it’s a really tight booth in restaurants.

also this is zoya’s ex-girlfriend nina who sometimes visits from ketterdam and brings her boyfriend and her girlfriend, and her girlfriend’s boyfriend, and his boyfriend, and his boyfriend.

AND THEN THEY ALL GET BRUNCH, THANK YOU AND GOOD NIGHT

baghra can come too but only because she likes getting day-drunk on mimosas with nikolai and bITCHING with him

god I miss brunch. and friendship. and cocktails. and human contact.

anyway back to actually watching this episode

I really like that Alina is about 10x more Actively Involved in everything that happens to her vs. in the first book where she’s more along for the ride

it is emotionally a weird experience to see Mal get pelted with a water bottle and go YEAAH followed by aw nah, he doesn’t deserve that. There is A Mal in another universe who deserves to get pelted by 15 water bottles but it is not this Mal. This Mal can stay. Book Mal is on thin fucking ice and will be pelted with water bottles. But Show Mal is Valid and Allowed. god Archie’s SO FUCKING good. I CANNOT BELIEVE I’M HAVING SOFT FEELINGS ABOUT THIS BUT HERE WE ARE, LIFE IS FULL OF SURPRISES, such is archie’s power and he deserves praise

“Your powers don’t scare me” OHHHHHHH SUCH AN IMPROVEMENT THANK GODDDDDDD !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

WHAT the FUCK I am having EMOTIONS over malina scenes

I LOVE NINA SO FUCKING MUCH. I love her endlessly giving Matthias a hard time. he deserves it. god I love HER SHE’S SO GOOD!!!!!!!!

ohhhhhh the MLEMS are FIIIIIGHTING

OHHHHHHHH THE EMO BOYS ARE FIIIIIIIGHTING

oh. my god. they stole the fuckin. they. okay but like, his horsies tho :(((((

KHDFGKSJDFHGSKDFJHGKH DAVID!!!!!! hkdfjhgdfkjghsdfhg d a v id. fjkdhgsdkjfhgdfh dddddaaavviiiiiiidddd. DAVID.

I absolutely love the thought of the darkling, ivan, and david hanging out, because it’s like the three least social people in all of ravka. and they absolutely LOVE one another’s company because no one talks, there is no small talk, and they can just SIT in SILENCE and it’s nICE. sometimes they make brief eye contact and nod a couple times and then go back to politely sitting in silence.

sdfjkghskhdf his disdainful little ~a d o r a b l e~ about mal and alina deeply resonates with my experiences of reading the books. though AGAIN, WEIRD TO BE HAVING FEELINGS NOW.

GOD SO NOW I HAVE TO DECIDE!!!!! IT’S SO FUCKING TEMPTING TO WATCH 7 AND 8 TOMORROW NIGHT. IT IS SO TEMPTING. THEN I CAN UNBLACKLIST IT AND REBLOG ALL THE GIFETS.

BUUUUUUUT I have a busy and hectic week and 7 and 8 would be a really nice treat to have waiting for me NEXT Friday as motivation to get through the week

But that also means I have to keep being vigilant about not looking at Content for another week AND IT’S REALLY HARD TO MAINTAIN THAT RESOLVE NOT TO LOOK

god I don’t know what to do. delayed gratification normally comes so naturally to me, this is an actual struggle. I thiiiiiink I’m gonna try and hold off because future!me will be grateful next friday. but mid-week me who wants to look at gifsets will be mad.

#it took me like two hours to watch because I kept pausing to liveblog #and go on tangents about polycules and brunch #I recognize that that was a BIG tangent but also like.#feel free to join me in 'everything is brunch and nothing hurts' world because it's nice there #I really want the enormous ravkan polycule and the enormous ketterdam polycule #and I will take ANY opportunity to talk about the single most important brotp in the entire grishaverse which is baghra and nikolai #it is not REMOTELY RELEVANT TO THIS EPISODE but I will TALK ABOUT IT #okay I think that's enough tags that it won't show up in tracked tags #grishaverse #shadow and bone

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missbrunettebarbie-writer · 4 years ago

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A long time ago @nectargrapes made a post about all the ships that have the same vibes as her Laila/Darius (If you don’t know who Laila and Darius are, go read Cammie’s amazing novel right now). I liked the idea a lot and thought to do the same....and then forgot about it xDD. Anyway, I present you all the ships that remind me of Pandora/Al.

1. Siena Rosso/Anthony Bridgerton (Bridgerton)

They share the same “can’t stay away from each other” dynamic. When they are in the same room, they can only stare at each other, the entire world fading somewhere in the background. In fact, I am quite sure I only started shipping Santhony because they remind me of Pandora/Al. The way Anthony just fell more and more with Siena with every passing day, how Siena only started this relationship for the benefits of having a powerful man help her get through life only to open her heart to him, it’s all very similar with how I am writing Pandora and Al in their early days.

2. Elektra Natchios/Matt Murdock (Netflix’s Daredevil)

Partners in crime who use their special training and abillities to committ illegal activities? Hell, yes. They are also so playful together which is the vibe I want Pandora/Al to give off. I remember that episode where Elektra and Matt meet for the first time and they break into a politician’s house and start playing the domestic couple and ngl, now I want to write a scene like this. On an angstier note, Mattelektra’s arc in The Defenders shares some emotional points with my darling OTP even if the storylines are very different.

3.Caroline Forbes/Klaus Mikaelson (The Vampire Diaries)

I already said that Pandora shares a lot of similarities with Caroline, so it shouldn’t come as a surprise Pandora too has a romance with a very old, very powerful creature. There is the same push and pull feel, the same games of cat and mouse. Pandora, like Caroline, starts the ‘relationship’ by using Al for her own ends. Oddly enough, I would say Pandora and Al are tamer than Klaroline: they are softer with each other, much more cooperative, they respect the other and their mind games are more for fun than anything else.

4. Buffy Summers/Angel(us) (Buffy the Vampire Slayer)

Four words: Doomed One True Love. I think this is the essence of both ships. Combine this with the way everyone frowns at the idea of Buffy and Angel being together and how even the universe seems to want them apart and yeah, you basically described both ships. (As a sidenote, I think Buffy is how Pandora was as a teenagers. It makes me wonder what would have happened if she met her Angel at that age instead of in her late twenties).

5. Zari Tarazi/John Constantine (Legends of Tomorrow)

Maybe it’s because I used Constantine’s actor, Matt Ryan, as a face claim, but this is another ship that vaguely has the same ~feel as Pandora/Al. I haven’t watched LOT in a long time (I should pick it up again), but I remember how much I enjoyed when their priorities clashed. John’s struggle to choose between Zari’s brother and his own promise to Astra is something Al can relate too xDD.

6. Nikita Mears/Michael Bishop (CW’s Nikita)

I’ve gotten the same vibes from the very first episode where Michael could not bring himself to kill Nikita. Nikita and Michael met when both of them were in an emotionally awful place (Michael’s family was killed, Nikita has just gotten volunteered to be an assasin), just like Pandora and Al. There is also the teacher-student angle with the student soon outdoing them, the way their loved for each other insipred them to fight for what’s right, The Marriage Theme and probably other things that don’t come to mind right now. I honestly didn’t expect to find so many parallels between these two ships, but they are definitely there.

#pandora/al #pandora adelardi #Al the demon #ships #parallels #inspiration #i guess/#PK Thoughts #pk #my thoughts #Pandora's Key

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theastrophilearchitect · 4 years ago

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I started writing a book.

And I’m mad about it, because I just started this post, brought up a new tab and lost it because I didn’t save my draft.

Anyway. That’s a thing I did. Wow.

As of this moment, this post won’t be going up until April 19th, but I’m starting writing this at 10.30pm on Sunday, February 21st, 2021. I’ve done a lot in the last couple weeks, and I want to have some record of all I’ve accomplished without just letting most of it fade over the next two months.

I’ve always wanted to be an author. From when I was reading under my covers with a torch past bedtime, through the years I wanted to be an artist, through the years I wanted to be a lawyer. It’s always been there - no matter what primary career path I went down, I wanted to be an author. The last few years, I’ve been invested in becoming a biologist, and that dream really took a backseat.

In the start of this lockdown, my mental health went downhill, and some advice my therapist gave me was just to prioritise myself. It sounds simple enough, but, even in my free time, I’d been focusing on schoolwork - revising constantly for exams I’m still not sure are actually happening. (Boris Johnson is apparently making an announcement tomorrow about beginning to ease lockdown, but we’ll see) So, on Saturday, February 6th, I started an attempt to coalesce the ideas I had floating in my head into something tangible.

I’ve tried to write books countless times (not technically countless - I have all the documents on my laptop, so I could if I wanted to), but mostly, I’ve never gotten further than a couple bare plot points and some characters, maybe some ideas for subplots, before I’ve stagnated and given up.

Three times, I’ve finished a skeletal outline. Twice, I’ve started to go back over those outlines only to realise they made no sense or just seemed week, and simply not cared enough to fix it. Until now, I guess.

February 6th, 7th, and fast-forward to my week off beginning the 15th, up until the 19th, I kept developing this concept I’d managed to form, but I was struggling to establish a coherent plot. I had up until and including a midpoint (which was later condensed into just a first act), but everything after that was just a void. I began searching for some skeletal structure I could apply to it, both to work on pacing and fill in the blanks. I tried several, and got a little further, but was about to give up hope.

Then I remembered a video by Katytastic I’d watched years ago about the 3-act, 9-block, 27-chapter structure she used, and couldn’t see the harm in giving it a go. And something clicked.

You can find the video here - the structure’s detailed and easy to follow, plus she even gives an example of using it to generate a plot.

I started binge-watching her writing vlogs in the background, and even started using her same writing program, Scrivener, which just made every a thousand times easier by taking away the need to juggle a billion Word documents. It’s fairly pricey, but I’m currently using the 30-day free trial - it’s 30 days of use, not of ownership, too: if you use it every day, it lasts 30 days, but if you use it once a week, it lasts 30 weeks.

Where Kat used the 27 parts the structure broke down into as chapters, I chose to refer to them as beats, and separate chapters later.

On Saturday the 20th, I finished defining my scenes and started writing an actual draft. I wrote two scenes, putting me at a collective word count (not including notes, synopses, etc.) of 2,580 words.

This morning, Sunday the 21st, I started over. I hated my opening. I’m not going to go through the mess of today’s process, but I currently have around 80 one-line-outline scenes, split into 3 acts. I wrote a draft of my prologue and detailed-outlined (which I’m mentally referring to as zero-outlining because it’s similar to how Katytastic does what she calls a zero draft, but is very much outlining, not a draft) two and a half other chapters. Scriver also tells me how many words I wrote in total, across notes, character profiles, location lists, a document I’ve named ‘Train of Thought’ for my ramblings as I go etc.

Today, I wrote a grand total of 4,141 words, which, rather counterintuitively, puts me at a draft total of 2,598. That makes sense. Anyway.

There are a lot of unknowns in the world right now, and I have no idea how much time I’ll have in the next six months to invest in this project, but I’d like, at bare minimum, to have one complete draft by the start of the next school year in September, which gives me just over 6 months. Which is probably too much time to actually motivate myself, but that’s not the point.

A manuscript needs to have a minimum word count of 50K words to be considered a novel, so, even though my ultimate goal for this project is around 80K words, 50K is going to be my goal for this draft.

I’m being optimistic about sticking with this.

Tuesday 23/02/2021 - Word Count: 3,099 I wrote nothing yesterday; planning to focus writing solely on days off rather than work days, but last night, watching through the incredibly long queue of Alexa Donne writing videos, I came to the conclusion writing every day, even just a little, would be the best way to ensure I keep working on this, so I set myself a goal of just 500 words a day.

Wednesday 24/02/2021 - Word Count: 5,350 After doing a little bit of maths as to how long this outlining and draft would take me if I were to only write 500 words a day, I decided to boost that goal to 1,000. I got started around 1pm today, online school draining me so much I couldn’t face another two hours. I worked on and off until 6pm, and around 4.45pm, I finished outlining Act One!

Thursday 25/02/2021 - Word Count: 7,022 I continued my scene outlining into Act Two, but I hit a brick wall around the midpoint. I have to write chronologically - some people jump around, but I have to write linearly, or it feels like I’m trying to make something in a void. It just doesn’t work. I didn’t know how to get from one scene to the next - there were so many things I needed to establish to get there, but I didn’t want to backtrack. I decided to re-jig the whole thing, but, after dinner, I realised I didn’t have to, and instead, decided to just start a draft, conscious of the things I need to establish as I go.

Friday 26/02/2021 - Word Count: 8,208 Starting draft one, I rewrote the prologue I’d already written, technically putting me to my second draft of it, because I’d been thinking about it for days and just wanted to revisit it, and it was so much better. Then I moved on to chapter one, but decided I wanted to re-jig my chapters. While outlining, I’d split the whole book into only about twenty chapters, but decided to go for shorter ones for more effective divisions of the story. I got most of the way through the first scene of chapter one, but basically ran out of both time and motivation, since I hadn’t heavily outlined that scene. in total, I wrote over 2000 words today, but because I only increased the prologue word count by about 100 words, it didn’t do that much to the total count.

Saturday 27/02/2021 - Word Count: 11,050 I got some chores done Saturday morning and focused on finishing my book so I could include it in my February wrap-up, but I still had time to get some writing done around mid-day. My goal was just to hit 10K this weekend, but I though I could do it in one day. I wrote about 1,000 words before feeling a little word-drained, but took a break for lunch, got back to it and wrote 2,400 words. Though that only added a little over 2,000 to the word count, it took me to 10K! I’m 20% of the way to being able to call it a novel! We’re in quintuple digits!

And then eight hours later, I wrote another thousand words and got to 11K.

Sunday 28/02/2021 - Word Count: 13,722 I spent most of my Sunday morning writing, though it took me more than two hours to write about 1500 words, though it only added about 1100 to my count. I decided to set myself an overall and weekly deadlines to hold myself accountable. Due to the fact I don’t yet have a clue how many words this will work out as, I decided I wanted to have either a complete first draft or 100K words (which I doubt I’ll reach, but it seems like a good way to make myself finish the draft before my deadline) by the end of April. Which works out to a little under 1500 words a day, or just under 11K a week, which is perfectly doable. Bearing in mind my current word count is including outlines, but I still believe in myself.

I wrote another 1600 words later, which took me to 14K, until I deleted the 300 word outline I wrote for one scene, but I worked out my words per day for the next two months with the assumption of a 10K word count as of March 1st and a target of either a complete draft or 100K words by the end of April, so I’m nearly 4,000 words ahead of schedule. Which gives me 6,606 words to write this week, instead of 10,328. (If you couldn’t tell, I like numbers. They just make sense to me.

Monday 01/03/2021 - Word Count: 15,005 I didn’t quite hit my daily goal, but I was completely leached of motivation today, I’m ahead of schedule anyway and I was only under by less than 200 words. It’s alright. But, hey, we hit 15K! Two days after hitting 10K!

Tuesday 02/03/2021 - Word Count: 21,119 This was an insane writing day. My end-of-day target was only 16,480, and that was still ahead of schedule - if I was sticking to the 100K by April 30th, I’d only actually need to be at 12,950 today. This was the best writing day I’ve ever had. I wrote before school and during breaks, which kept both my writing and working momentum up.

I didn’t read a page of my current read, but I wrote a total of 7,681 words and increased my wordcount by 6,114 words, or literally an additional 40.75%. I hit 20K three days after hitting 10K, and am 42.238% of the way to being able to say I wrote a novel, be it a shitty first draft that won’t be complete at 50K words.

I also finished chapter three, which I’ve been working on for three days and came out ~5,000 words, and wrote chapters four and five in their entirety.

Note to self: this is day 10 of vaguely outline-drafting this project.

Wednesday 03/03/2021 - Word Count: 23,364 I've only written 490 words today, as of writing this update, but I just wanted to make note of the fact I've done some calculations, and can reasonably finish my draft this month. I'm still not completely sure how long it'll work out to be, so I can't quite work out my daily words to finish on the 31st, but if I stick to my current 1,475 words a day, I'll hit 63,894 words by the end of the month, which is a little less than I imagine this draft will be, but if I stick to that as a minimum, my first draft won't have to go into April.

I'd like to post this later this week, but I already have a post for this Friday, so God only knows how long this will be by the time it goes up. So far, I've written 1,900 words today, and I don't think I'm out of fuel yet, but I'm stopping because I need to read today, and I'd rather not burn out. I'm over my goal, anyway.

Oh, also, I'm nearly at 25K, which is halfway to a novel, but I haven't broken into Act Two yet, which means this book will be 75K minimum. I'm going to do some maths and work out how many words a day to hit 80K by March 31st. 2,030. That's doable. So I haven't read, but back to writing for like ten minutes.

I've now hit an additional 2,245 words for the day, though I wrote a total of 2,663

Thursday 04/03/2021 - Word Count: 25,415 I've decided to work out how many words I need to write each day to hit 80K by March 31st, and watch the fluctuations. (I like statistics). It should steadily go down throughout the month if I surpass it each day. Today's minimum word count is 2,023, already seven words less than yesterday's. How exciting.

The last scene of Act One was very heavy on world-building I haven't yet figured out, so I stuck what was meant to happen in brackets and just moved on, meaning I have now broken into Act Two!

I think, during the week, I'm going to focus on just meeting my minimum word count rather than exceeding it, just to save fuel for the weekends, when I can write so many more words.

And, we hit 25K! I'm halfway to a novel!

Friday 05/03/2021 - Word Count: 26,693 In complete honesty, I'm beginning to lose momentum. Maybe it's just today, but I don't really want to write and feel like I need a break, but I'm going to make myself write anyway. I'm going to make myself keep writing until this draft is done, however shitty it may end up. I really hate first drafts.

When you say 2,000 words is only 7-8 pages, it doesn't sound like that much to write per day but my god. Luckily, most of the stuff I've had to save to a Pinterest board called 'Writing Motivation' says if you write when you don't want to, it should pass instead of worsening. I wanted to hit 35K this weekend, but I'm not sure I'll have the momentum. I'll at least hit 31,270, though, which is my minimum goal for this week. I'm still over 700 words off my goal for today, but I'm taking a break because my head is foggy and there's still eight hours left in the day. Besides, 700 after dinner is easy. She says, realising she's probably jinxing it. Oh, well. 80K by March 31st would be difficult, even if I weren't going back to school soon, but that's a stretch goal. 100K by April 31st is my minimum, and I'm 9,000 ahead of where I need to be for that.

I think I’m stagnating because I’ve hit the ‘Fun and Games’ section, which I find really boring. I’m going to try to keep going with it, but I may just skip it and come back later.

Saturday 06/03/2021 - Word Count: 28,150 So, I did not get the extra 700 words in. Before dinner, some stuff I had to deal with came up, and by the time it was done, I just wanted to go to bed, so I did. Today, I'm going to try to make up for it, which I think is reasonable because it is now the weekend. I'm still kinda exhausted this morning, but I'm going to do my best, and my wrist hurts, but I'm not sure why. You'd think it would be from all the typing, but only one wrist hurts - you know what? Never mind. They do both hurt. I'm just not sure why, but it doesn't hurt typing this, so that doesn't make any sense. Anyway, to hit my word count for the day, I need to write 2,555 words, which doesn't sound like too much, but it kinda is because I'm primarily writing Act Two at the minute, and for every thousand words I write, I lose like 400 from my outline. You'd think I'd just not include my scene outlines in the word count, but it's too late for that now.

I'm thinking this over, and I really don't think trying to write 80K by the end of the month is going to be good for either my motivation, mental health, or ability to function back at school, so I'm going to stick to 100K or a finished draft by April 30th, and re-work out my goals from there, based on yesterday's word count, so I'm not making myself do catch-up today.

So, to hit 100K by April 30th, I only need to write 1,309 words each day (which will decrease over time because if that's my minimum now, I'll probably surpass it, decreasing the amount of words left etc.). That's so much less pressure.

God, I really don't want to write today. I just want to watch YouTube and Netflix and read.

Okay, so here's the thing. I've been working on this story straight for three weeks and I'm kinda exhausted of it. I'm not done with it, not at all, and I want to keep working on it because it exists, which makes it workable.

I watched a writing vlog by ShaelinWrites yesterday, and she said she writes different projects at once, alternating in week- or multi-week-long blocks. I think I might try that.

My plan with this post and the following updates was to keep updating it until the day it goes up, the day after which is when I begin drafting the next, but, since I may be switching projects for a while and this is really about the project I've decided to dub 'Bay Tree' (which is just, I guess, a pseudonym for here because while I have no idea what it would eventually be called, I know that's nothing like the title I'd want to give it) so I'd want to start a new post for a new project.

I'm now doing a little outlining instead of actually continuing writing, but I think this will help me, though I'm still not certain about whether or not I'm going to directly continue with this specific project for the minute. Instead of setting daily goals based on a target, I'm also just going to say 1,000 words a day, and see where that takes me.

I've just been outlining into Act Three, and I've met a major plot stumble, but I'm going to work that out and explain what I'm doing in my next writing update.

So, go drink some water, eat if you haven't eaten in the last few hours, stand in front of the mirror and tell yourself how wonderful you are and how much happiness you deserve, and, if you want to write a book, stop thinking about it, and go write.

#blog #blogging #blogger #blogpost #blog post #writing #books #book #reading #read #write #writer #author #draft #first draft #story #writing blog #writerblr #bookblr #novel #debut

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scattered-irises · 4 years ago

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LONG AWAITED CONCLUSION TO THAT ZEXAL PHILOSOPHICAL CHAT I POSTED A YEAR (or two) AGO

Part i

Basically, the theory is: Tron is a figment of the Arclights’ imagination and it’s actually just Byron going around messing everything up. Tron is a symbol of the corruption of the Arclights.

****

And so, I pose you this question, Phosphorous. What if Tron never existed and was just a metaphorical representation for Byron's hatred and anger? What if the Barian World hadn't done anything to him and instead, just made him an angrier old man? So instead of this creepy, laughing child, we have this creepy man who goes around ruining people's lives for the sake of his revenge.

The child is just something the Arclight brothers made up because they couldn't stand the fact that their father had become like that. But that was why they still followed him. Because he was still their father.

I see your point there. It has plausibility, muses Phosphorous.

The reason why Tron erased their old names was because it was a way for all of them to disassociate their current selves with their past selves. They have changed too much to be considered Byron, Christopher, Thomas and Michael anymore. Christopher has turned extremely cold and calculating compared to his happier, gentle brother attitude when he was younger.

And Thomas...the poor child. He used to be a happy boy that teased his younger sibling but as IV, he masks himself as a happy celebrity loved by all in the world and underneath that mask is a sadistic monster and underneath that mask is a son that just desperately wants his father back and will do anything to get it and underneath that mask is a lonely young man who wishes to be understood.

Arguably, Michael is the one who remains closest to his original self. He's still the beloved younger brother and like when they were younger, still has a close relationship with Thomas. But he's cracked beneath his placid smile and gentle nature. When angered, he lashes out terribly and like Thomas, will do anything, even murder, to achieve his family's goals.

And so, one could argue that Tron is basically just an overall representation that their family has changed for the worse.

“How much autonomy do the brothers have? and how do they relate to others as they attempt to fulfill their families goals?” poses Phosphorous.

Ah, ah. An insightful query, my friend. They are pretty much never seen doing things of their own free will. Even when it seems like they are enjoying themselves (I.E III sneaking into Yuma's house to eat lunch and meet him. It actually was just a scouting mission on his family's next target), their actions are meant to serve ulterior motives. In the end, all of the things they do is in the name of serving the family.

A somewhat random note, Christopher looks at Thomas with contempt. They're basically polar opposites (But not really. Once Christopher gets emotional, he's just as broken and destructive as Thomas).

Thomas has a grudging respect for Christopher because a part of him still recognizes him as his older brother.

Christopher seems to care a bit more for Michael, but when Michael was being tortured, he watched the scene at the insistence of Tron. At the end of it though, he turns away, hinting at a bit of a conscience.

It's Thomas and Michael that are more of a sibling relationship. This is most likely because they have spent all of their lives together while Christopher had been absent for 5 years from their lives. He was gone when Thomas was 12 all the way to when he turned 17 and Michael was 10 and is now 15

Thomas genuinely cares for Michael, going as far as to shout at Tron for treating his brother like that. Christopher immediately silences him.

Michael also returns that gesture, although less because he ended up falling into a coma before we could see more.

“Yet all three are, at least at times, willing participants in Tron's schemes?”

Yes, my fellow thinker. Christopher is the most loyal one. He never questions Tron’s orders. Michael will go with his father in hopes that he will get his family back. He is Tron's favorite because he is a "gentle and obedient child." I find it quite sad how, although Christopher is the most loyal one to the cause, he isn’t the favorite. I suppose it is also because I am the eldest of three, yet am not as favored as the youngest.

“The youngest seems to be favored most of the time,” muses Phosphorous as they look out at the tumultuous Barian sea.

It's Thomas that sometimes goes out of line. He's the strongest of the brothers, but Tron is always saying that he is the weakest. It is most likely the fear of Thomas realizing that he's actually powerful and could turn on Tron. Hence, that is why Tron says he trusts no one.

Phosphorous stands, overlooking the gloomy landscape of crystals.

“So each and every one is then beholden to this idea of what? A happy family? Or just something different than their current state of affairs? Do all the brothers truly share this idea of a return to a happy family? Or do they don't even know that that looks like and just want something to change?”

In short:

Tron: Kill my murderers and I'll become your happy ol' dad again and we can go back to England and do happy British people stuff

Sons: Uh sure okay

Personally, I think they all know to an extent that they're deluding themselves

They're just ambling down this path of lies because the brothers are desperate to have a place to belong to after being separated for so long

But you might have a point that they might not even know what a truly happy family is anymore.

“So it's like they're chasing something that doesn't exist then?”

Exactly. Much like the couple that was running to the end of the rainbow. They are chasing a boat that has already long passed by. After all of the things Tron did to them, I'm sure they all know that they will never be "normal" and "happy" again.

“So under your theory, Tron doesn't truly exist, or at least is highly metaphorical, which makes all of their struggles self-inflicted and their delusions even more deep.”

Quite perceptive of you. Tron does exist, but he's basically Byron but meaner. They merely use the child with the ruined face to cover up the fact that their father has turned into a monster.

"Hey so dad's gone nuts but let's pretend it's a weird little boy who's nuts so it takes a bit of the pain away."

“Ah, so then they could say "Tron" instead of ‘Father.’”

Yes, exactly. They almost never address Tron as father. They only talk of their father in the past tense.

“But then,” proposes Phosphorous, dramatically turning back to me. “Why would they care so much for the new names they received? Or do they not care for them?”

Those names have become a part of their identities. They use it to cope with the fact that they've all gone south personality-wise. Thomas even uses IV as his celebrity name, perhaps as a sign that he does not recognize his celebrity persona as his true self.

Phosphorous takes in a deep breath, the acidic breeze rustling their toga. Their eyes meet mine own with a sharpness that I had always so admired.

“So these new names, they're basically masks, but do they disassociate themselves from their new identities the same way they do with Tron and their Father, or do they still think of themselves as fundamentally themselves, just forced to do things they wouldn't normally do? Though I would assume each brother is affected differently by their mask,” says my friend as they begin to pace.

Ah, they still view Tron as their father (A leader) but deep down they probably don't want to put two and two together. So it's a superficial belief of "We fight for Tron (our father but let’s not think about that.)"

Either that or,

They are fighting for their Father,

who is basically just an idea of a happy family now whilst Tron

represents a bad family.

Onto your second point, the brothers fit into their masks to different extents.

Michael doesn't seem to mind III for they appear to have the same personality, save for III's destructive tendencies.

When Christopher is reunited with his student that he abandoned and is called Christopher, he sadly smiles and says.

"It's been a long time since someone has called me that"

And Thomas probably has an extremely difficult time taking off his mask after wearing it for so long in front of so many people

“So then do their numbered names also represent a bad family? also why do they start at three, like why not 1,2,3 instead of 3,4,5?”

I still don’t understand why it’s 3 4 5 (Nor does anyone else, for that matter.), however, their numbers are probably how Tron sees them. From his scientific background, he probably just sees his son as pieces of useful data he can use to his advantage.

“Hm, the only thing I could think of for the numbers was that Tron was somehow including him and the boys' mother in his count, like their the first two so that's why it starts at three, which is something you probably already thought about,” theorizes Phosphorous futilely.

Perhaps the numbers are used as place holders. They are not Christopher, Thomas and Michael. They are merely placeholders for when Christopher, Thomas and Michael return. When their family is whole again...

“But if the numbers are place-holders then so is the name ‘Tron,’” concludes Phosphorous.

Indeed.

“But I wonder if the brothers associate the numbers with Tron, like the numbers aren't really them, just a means to an end that will be removed when they get their father back, or if they're deluding themselves,” muses my friend.

Yes, the numbers are most likely temporary to them. Christopher is deluding himself.

He knows that he’s Christopher under V’s cold exterior. Same for Thomas and Michael. They are a family of delusions, united under the promise of a better tomorrow that will never arrive.

And so I thank you, for bearing with me.

Without ceremony, Phosphorus walks away from the crystal cliff, leaving me. I stare into the depths of the sea of ill intent and allow the sounds of the waves crashing against the crystal to overtake me. Closing my eyes, I begin to meditate.

Thus we conclude our bout of philosophy and ardent beard stroking.

#zexal #analysis #zexal analysis #long post #Christopher Arclight #Michael Arclight #Thomas Arclight #Byron Arclight #Tron Zexal #Iris thinks hard

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realllllfangirllllll · 5 years ago

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More Than Friends ||

Chp. 29

Masterlist

CEO!Jaehyun AU x Reader

College Student!Jaemin AU x Reader

Summary: After a complicated relationship with the infamous CEO, you want nothing more than to live your life as a normal college student; however, Mr. CEO just can’t let you go.

{ Previous / Next }

Warnings: Slightly Suggestive

You heard your doorbell ring a couple times as you struggled to carry two large blankets from your bedroom to the living room couch. You plopped down on top of the piled blankets. Exhausted, you shouted to the person waiting at the door, “Who’s there?”

The person on the other door responded back with a question, “The dummy who left his notebook here?”

You laughed and shouted back, “The passcode is 1497!”

You heard Jaemin open your door but you were too tired to get up. He saw you laid flat against the blankets and jumped on top of you, squashing your tiny frame into the duvet covers. You mumbled against the sheets, “What are you doing Nana??” You tried to wriggle out underneath him, “Get off of me fatty.”

He laughed and hugged you tighter, “I thought you were too tired huh?”

You flipped around and suddenly, the two of you were face to face. He stared at you and spoke sternly, “Tsk tsk, you didn’t even get the door when I came to restock your fridge.”

You giggled and pulled one of your arms out from between the both of you, ruffling his soft hair, “Thank you, delivery man.” You smiled and instantly, Jaemin’s heart was filled with warmth. If the two of you were any closer, you could’ve heard his heart pounding.

You noticed his eyes staring at you and realized the position you were in. You quickly separated from him and awkwardly went to the kitchen to get snacks. Jaemin attempted to shake off the intense feeling by starting a movie.

As the two of you got situated on the couch, both of you watch the movie silently. The air conditioner quickly filled the room with coldness and you wrapped the blanket around you tighter. You sighed in annoyance as the thin blanket did nothing to keep you warm. Suddenly, you sneezed three times and Jaemin chuckled at you, “You sound like an adorable little kitten.”

You rubbed the tip of your nose and glared at him, “I’m not little.”

He ruffled your hair and teased, “Does the little kitten want an extra blanket?”

Pouting, you replied, “Yes please.”

You looked up at him with large, puppy brown eyes and he chuckled. You waited for him to give you his blanket but he opened his arms instead. You stared at him with confusion and he laughed at your oblivion. Still holding his arms wide open, he told you, “Come in, you’ll get warmer with body heat.”

You stared at him for a moment, thinking if you should give in to his offer or freeze to death. He motioned for you to come forward again and you gave in. Leaning forward, Jaemin wrapped his arms around you and pulled you closer. You were comfortable and warm with his arms wrapped around you, but you couldn't help but feel guilty. You knew if Jaehyun ever saw you in another man’s arms, he would rage like there’s no tomorrow. You were also a bit guilty because you haven’t told Jaemin, nor your closest friends, about your relationship. However, you knew it was too complicated to let them know that you are dating one of South Korea’s most famous and successful figures. So instead, you secretly dated him, going on office dates and posting pictures of the places you’ve been to without showing each other’s faces.

It was hard and mentally exhausting to hide such a big secret, but you knew it was for the better. However, as you leaned closer to Jaemin’s chest you heard his heart beating impossibly fast and that’s when you knew you had to tell him before he developed any other feelings.

You slightly got up from his hold and faced him with a serious expression. You anxiously called him, “Nana?”

He turned away from the tv and looked at you, “Hmm?”

You grabbed the corner of the blanket tightly and started nervously, “There’s something I need to tell you...”

Worried laced his face when he saw your anxious expression. He asked with concern, “What’s wrong y/n?”

“Well... There was something I was supposed to tell you a long time ago but didn’t... And I think it’s only right to tell you now...”

He looked at you with confusion and you continued meekly, “I am da-”

Suddenly, your door flung open and the both of you jumped. The first instinct for Jaemin was to protectively shield you, so he grabbed your shoulders and pulled you close.

When a tall figure came into view, your eyes widened in surprise. “J-jaehyun?”

Jaemin looked at you with confusion, “You know this guy?”

You turned your head toward him and nodded slowly.

“Who is he, and why did he just barge in like this?” Jaemin gently let go of you and stood up, facing Jaehyun suspiciously, “May I help you?”

Jaehyun scoffed and replied coldly, “I should be asking you that, little boy.”

Jaemin looked at him in surprise. Offended, he replied, “Who are you calling a little boy? Get out of here before I call the cops on you.”

Staring straight at him, Jaehyun cursed, “Who the fuck are you calling the cops for? You heard her, she knows me.” He then stepped closer, spitting his words harshly, “I’m her boyfriend so you better back the fuck off or I’ll call the cops.” He scanned his body and stared back at him, “Not that I can’t take you out on my own.”

You stood in horror as Jaehyun harshly confessed to Jaemin. You tried to say something but nothing came out of your mouth.

Jaemin’s eyes widened in shock as he heard Jaehyun announce their relationship. You walked up to them, wanting to explain for yourself. When he saw you step into his view, he gently placed his hands on your shoulder, staring at you softly and asked, “Is that true y/n?”

You looked at him guiltily, “Yes... I was just going to tell-”

Before you could finish, Jaehyun smacked his hands away from your shoulders. You jumped slightly and tried to tell him to stop, to calm down, to do anything but give in to his anger and just hear you out, but you were too late. Before you can even blink, Jaehyun said with rage, “I told you to back off,” and he swung his arms, landing a sharp blow to Jaemin’s face. Jaemin fell two steps back and you tried your best to hold him up. He gained his balance and stood straight, he scoffed and wiped his hands over his lips, “Your boyfriend’s quite the hothead y/n.”

You looked at the scene in horror, your limbs failing you in the most crucial moment.

Jaehyun raised an eyebrow, glaring at Jaemin he questioned, “The fuck you just say?” He stepped forward again ready to pounce on him but you stood in between them, thanking the gods as your limbs finally moved on your accord. You looked at Jaehyun seriously and placed your hands on his chest, “What the fuck are you doing Jaehyun? Stop. He didn’t do anything to me.”

You then turned around, looking at Jaemin with concern. You cupped his face and forced him to look at you, “Oh my god... are you ok? Do you need an ice pack? Oh my gosh, you’re bleeding.” You kept scanning his face with worry and he gave you a reassuring look.

Jaehyun, on the other hand, had enough. He couldn’t stand the way you looked at him, and he most definitely, couldn’t stand the way that your hands were placed on his face. He tried stepping forward again to put Jaemin in his place, but you let go of Jaemin’s face and grabbed onto Jaehyun’s arm. You turned to a fuming Jaehyun and you glared at him, “I said stop it!! You already hurt him so much! What else do you want to do?”

You felt his fist clenched as you yelled at him and you turned to face Jaemin, “I’m so sorry Nana... Please go home for now, I have no promises that he won’t kill you right now. I’ll resolve this misunderstanding and drop by tomorrow to check on your wounds ok?”

He nodded with understanding and left your apartment. As the door closed, you let out a breath you didn’t know you were holding. Your hand dropped to unwrap Jaehyun’s fist. You asked softly, “Babe... what the heck was that...”

He pushed your hand away and scoffed, “Nana? Seriously?” He rolled his eyes and went to the kitchen, grabbing a glass of water to cool down.

You followed him quietly and you waited for him to calm down. After he finished his water, he loudly slammed the glass on the counter and leaned on the marble. He stared at you and asked, “So? I’m waiting for an explanation.”

He continued sarcastically as his rage built up again, “I’m waiting for the perfect explanation that will tell me why the fuck that boy was holding and touching you while you did nothing to stop it.”

You sighed and told him, “It’s not what you think it is... He’s just my friend, and I was cold.”

He scoffed, “That was such a lousy excuse y/n...”

You looked at him offended, “But that’s the truth! And whether you’re going to accept it or not, is up to you. I don’t care what you think anymore... You just punched an innocent man for christ’s sake.”

You huffed in annoyance and turned your heels to walk back to your room. Stopping midway, you turned towards him, “And just fyi, I was going to tell him about you before you so rudely broke into my house. Go fix my lock before you leave,” you spat and turned to leave.

He let out a sigh as you retreated to your bedroom, getting ready to shower and call it a day.

~~~

You walked out of the bathroom, drying your wet hair with a towel. You expected to see your bed welcome you with wide arms but was met with a stressed-out Jaehyun instead. Although you were mad at him for his reckless, possessive behaviors, you’ve come to a realization as you were showering. You understood that if you were in his shoes, you would’ve been filled with jealousy too. Although you wouldn’t have punched an innocent person, you would’ve still been fuming with anger. So as you walked out and saw Jaehyun with the top four buttons of his black dress shirt unbuttoned and his hair a mess, you knew he was regretting his impulsive tendencies. You’ve seen enough of his ‘post-meeting’ demeanor to know that his current expression was one of stress and regret.

You sighed softly and walked up to him. Climbing on to his lap, you threw the towel on to a nearby chair and grabbed his face. You stared into his deep brown eyes and assured him, “It’s ok.”

He looked at you with softness in his eyes. Placing his hands on top of yours, he responded softly, “No it’s not... I’m so sorry baby...”

He continued as his fingers began rubbing circles on the surface of your hands, “I feel like shit for doing that to him... but I hated him with all my guts when I saw him touch you... and you didn’t answer my calls, so I only assumed the worst...”

You looked at him sincerely and replied, “It’s ok, I get it.”

He dropped his eyes down to his lap and continued, “No you don’t... You don’t understand what it’s like to worry how your future is going to end up as, or more importantly, who you end up with.”

You stared at him as he appeared small in front of you, he spoke with sorrow and pain, “To be honest, I don’t even think love lasts... not when I see my father go around having flings with some low life chick after my mom died...”

Surprised at his story, you looked at him with sadness. For some reason, you never would have thought someone could understand your pain, but here he was, spilling his life story to you. At that moment, your heart felt something strange. It was as if there were strings pulling at your heart and you couldn't cut them off. You softly replied, “When I was three, my brother and I were left alone at a department store because my parents decided they couldn’t raise two kids. They hated each other’s guts and never cared for us... At the end, they thought the only logical approach was to leave us in the customer support section and leave us to fend for ourselves.” You told him the last part of your story with wet eyes and a cracked voice.

He finally looked up at you, his heart ached as he heard your story. He softly wiped your tears away with his hand and placed his forehead against yours, whispering, “I will never leave you y/n. Even if the world falls apart, you’ll always have me.”

You sobbed softly and let go of his face, pulling him into a tight hug. You replied as more tears left your eyes, “I love you Jaehyun. I love you so much, Jung Yoonoh.”

He rubbed your back soothingly and kissed the side of your head, “Look at me silly,” he said softly.

You pulled away and wiped your tears, staring at him with puffy eyes.

He smiled at you and leaned forward, kissing you softly. Your lips moved together, naturally melding with each other. You leaned forward a little more and he slowly fell back on to the soft mattress. You gently unbuttoned the rest of his black dress shirt and ran your hands over his fluffy hair. Jaehyun rid you of your silky pajama set and grabbed your waist, lifting you up to sit on his stomach. You felt his solid hard abs underneath you as he took his pants off, tossing it on the floor he pulled you down.

Connecting your lips once again, he slowly pushed his length inside you. You pulled away from his lips and tossed your head back, moaning in pleasure. He let out a soft groan as he held your face down to look at him. With hooded eyes, you stared at him as he told you, “I love you y/n. For now, and forever.”

———

• STREAM BOOM •

• And Humph! It’d be so nice if ptg finally get their 1st win 🤧💙 •

• Sorry Multistan problems~ •

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kryptsune · 5 years ago

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I have a Confession... {Red X Frisk Drabble}

FRANS WEEK 2020 // Day 1: Confession

>>Day 2

@fransweek

🌼So a little bit about this. I am planning on doing Frans week this year that said I also don’t want to stress myself out. I have a sketch that I am working on that combines a few of the prompts but I still wanted to do something for day one so here is Underworld Red and Frisk after her run. Frans is so important to me so it is nice to post this kind of content again.

If you are currently reading Underworld there are a couple of spoilers within this that have yet to show up in the fic. I actually have decided to write this out instead because I am currently editing and getting feedback on the latest chapter which I plan to get up today at some point. If not it is going to be tomorrow. This scene is not canon to Underworld btw angst ahead.

===========================

She had yanked her hand away yelling only for him to become a little overly aggressive. It had slipped her mind as she shook from his actions. His boney almost claw-like fingers dug into her skin causing a blossom of blood to form and trickle down her arm. He had released her when he didn’t realize his own strength but it was too late.

Her ears rang with his shouts as she ran clutching her arm. Her legs brought her to the only place she found solace. A small little place in Waterfall. She collapsed next to the glowing blue stream shivering as if the very ground she now rested was but ice. When she looked down at her arm, the wound was nowhere to be seen.

That only meant that her mind had started to decay and old horrors were spilling out. Did he even grab her? Her eyes filled with tears as she placed her shaking hand against her lips. What was real? What was fake? She knew that he loved her but this. She was sure she looked at him with horror swimming in those cobalt depths. The fear was undeniable and he had done nothing to deserve it. How could you ever love someone that saw the shadow of your former self-overlaid over the present? Was she a hypocrite? She told him that she forgave him and yet her mind was wrought with rot. It’s decay slowly creeping deeper and deeper into her mind. The ghosts of the past haunted her even to the extreme of physical sensation. What were you supposed to trust?

She closed her eyes leaning forward in defeat. Her age was in its prime. A young woman with so much life to live and yet this disease had slowly consumed her sanity and with age, it would only devour what was left of the present. She couldn’t put him through that. It would break her heart. She didn’t deserve him not after that. At that moment her heart began to break. She loved him so much that his happiness went beyond her selfishness. He was better off finding a monster to be with than her. She would get old, her condition would become worse, and he would be tied to a human with such a short life in comparison to his own. It was the way it truly had to be. No amount of apology could ever fix what she had just done even if it was not in her proper state of mind.

She just sat there staring blankly into the water only to hear a small noise off to the side. It was him. It was near impossible for her to truly be alone when he was able to track her down so easily. Even when he approached she refused to raise her head to look at him, “I’m sorry…” She nearly choked on her next set of words as they passed her wavering lips, “We can’t be together. I…. I can barely control myself any longer. All I see is the worst part of you when…”

The tears began to form as she tried to stop herself, “I know there is so much I love. I…I don’t even deserve you. I want to love you and keep you close to me but I fear I am losing my mind. I see things past and.“ She was cut off as she screwed her eyes shut only whimpering a few chosen words, "I’m so sorry I yelled…. That I ran… I don’t know what is wrong with me anymore.”

Physical ailments could be treated with simple medication or rest but the mind is a complex beast. Just as it’s physical appearance depicts it is a maze that one could be trapped in for all eternity with no hope of escape. She was shaking and nearly on the cliff of a panic attack. What would he say?

All she felt was gentle arms wrapping around her from behind cradling her in that warm embrace. How could he even look at her let alone touch her? All she could hear was that soft twinkle of chimes that made Waterfall so unique. He loved her, cared for her, and comforted her. He was her best friend and now someone she couldn’t imagine being without. His silence only led to soft gestures like the wiping of tears, a soft squeeze, and a small smile. He didn’t need words to tell her how he felt. When the silence finally broke she was staring up into those red eyes. One that used to frighten her but now drew her in with that brilliant ruby hue.

He knew what it was like to lose your mind as his father had made sure of it. The monster he once was and the one she had met were like doppelgangers and though those traits from his past had returned he still struggled with the one thing that stained his very being. The very thing that had nearly torn half the Underworld apart with its aggression and madness. To see her go through the same pains hurt his soul.

He had learned to control his and yet hers only seemed to become worse. He feared one day she would harm herself due to some demon that crept into her mind. Take that pain away... that was all that he wanted for her. Even her outbursts could never change how much he loved her. Even if she tried to pull away he would always pull her back. He had done this to her and so he deserved what he was getting.

He only threaded his fingers through her hair gently combing through the auburn strands, “Why would ya ever think I’d be mad at ya?” He had been working tirelessly for weeks trying to improve her mental condition and yet no amount of magic could fix her wounds, “Ya don’t deserve me? Sweetheart, ya got it backward. I did this ta ya and I’m sorry. I wish I could take it all back er’… erase all tha bad but I can’t. You could yell at me fer tha rest of yer life… I will never leave ya.”

He just held her praying to someone, anyone that one day those demons would be purged from her mind even if that meant he had to be out of the equation. She deserved better and though he loved her with his every breath he could not deny that he was only causing her more pain. He could feel her small frame shuddering as she sobbed, “Shhhh I gotcha.”

It was ironic considering the place she had chosen to escape to. It was a special place for both of them. It did not look like much but this was the place where his once cold and ruthless soul had been soothed. No amount of words or magic could do what her warm smile had or just that sparkle of hope and love in her eyes. It was the moment he realized he had been horribly wrong about the seemingly fragile human girl sitting beside him and how much of the term monster he had become.

A truly awful horrible demon of a skeleton that didn’t deserve her angelic mercy. He had a difficult time living with his past actions drowning in a regret that not even time could cure. He remembered finding her trying to hold back tears as she wrapped her pale arms around herself. Seeing his handiwork in full display only for her to panic at his snooping. She explained that though time appeared broken for her that did not mean there were no consequences to such a thing. She called it a curse and rightfully so. Even as they sat in silence he could feel his thoughts shifting.

That was the moment that changed everything. That was truly the moment that he realized just how special she was and how important she was to him specifically. He nearly cursed himself for not seeing it sooner. It was the same exact spot. The only difference was that he had no hesitation in his comforting of her. He wanted her to know that no matter what he would always be there no matter what she did because deep down a little of her hope had made its way into him. He would save her just like she had saved him all those years ago. She deserved happiness and he knew that for her that included him just as much. She had said so herself.

He closed his sockets just resting his mouth on the crown of her head before slowly raising it to speak clearly, “Ya saved everyone Sweetheart… now let me save you, alright?”

He continued to hold her like the little fragile thing she was letting her feel that warmth and comfort. That loving embrace that would never leave her. She looked up at him now calmed by the soft words and warm cradle of his arms. It was a simple word one that might make another laugh at its absurdity, “Red…”

Ah yes, the nickname. The very one that had been a joke in the past. A failed attempt at a kind of quip for his use of so many pet names for her. There was one that stood out among the rest, sweetheart. There was nothing as fitting as that one simple word for her. She had made a point about mocking his fashion sense and his unfortunate eye color saying that he should be nicknamed after the color he seemed to be drowned in but it was his.

A name that proved that though he had become something he hardly recognized that was the person she had grown fond of and could call a friend. It was special even if to the untrained eye it would appear rather bland or foolish. When that word slipped past her lips his soul would thump in his chest skipping the nonexistent beat that filled what a heart would do.

He stared into those blue eyes that were filled with so much love for him something he never thought he would ever deserve. No, no one could say that name like she could. She didn’t need to speak anymore he just swept her off her feet so they could once again return home. He would keep hope for a brighter future and one day all those grey clouds would give way to the most beautiful blue sky.

She had already cleared away the storm for him now it was his turn to show her the true beauty of a night sky unhindered by a single cloud. A peace, love, and happiness unmatched and unequal to anything on this planet or under it.

💙Ways to Support💙:

(Like AU and interesting worldbuilding? I have the post for you. Click on the AU master list and it will take you to the over 16+ AU and worlds I have built in this multiverse. This is just one of many)

Multiverse AU Masterlist: >>>List is here<<<

Discord: >>>>Underworld<<<< (this is the best way to find/get to know me)

Archive of Our Own: >>>Fallenfellfrisk<<<

Twitter: >>>Fallen_fell<<<<

Kofi: >>>Fallenfellfrisk<<<

——————————————

Thank you, everyone, for your continuous love and support. It truly means so much to me.

#undertale #frans #frisk x sans #underfell #Red X Frisk #Underworld Au #Underworld #WTU #Welcome to the Underworld #fransweek2020 #fransweek #drabble #Red Fontaine #Sans Fontaine #fluff #angst #Day 1

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seancekitsch · 5 years ago

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Richie Tozier x Reader: 27 Years Later... Revamped!

You heard it here folks! I’ve updated my big Richie x Reader post to be more inclusive! The reader is now gender neutral instead of female, and I’ve mixed elements from the book and the new movie IT chapter 2! warning, i am a book purist so there are some plot elements from the book that do not occur in the movie! Enjoy!

-Growing up, you had always been Stan’s. You’d be each other’s go-to people, sometimes even closer than Richie and Eddie. He had been your perfect Boy Scout crush growing up, and after the first encounter with IT, he decided he couldn’t dance around his feelings any longer and asked you out.

-You always felt like the loser on the “outside”, you were at all group hang outs and meetings but you didn’t really hang out with anyone but Stan besides the occasional sleepover with Bev, but after Stan’s bar mitzvah that changed. Richie was the only loser to attend (besides you) and that meant a great deal to you. Despite how Stan used to get annoyed at Richie’s jokes, you always made sure to go out of your way to include him and befriend him after that day.

-Even though the losers drifted during high school, you remained Stan’s partner and Richie’s best friend besides Eddie. You had a lot more in common with Richie than you had originally thought because both of you essentially had to raise yourselves. Stan found a new found respect for the fellow loser over this connection you had.

-Stan was your first everything, from kisses to heartbreak. Yes, heartbreak. You broke up the summer before college. You were going out to California for school on an honours program and he was going to a university in Georgia with his twin sister. It was practical but it didn’t mean it didn’t sting either of you. You had promised to remain on good terms, however.

-Despite him moving on in Georgia, you never really did. He after college quickly married a woman named Patricia and settled in Atlanta. You met back up with Richie after graduation, and moved into a townhouse with him in Beverly Hills. Despite dating around, you never had much luck, probably thanks to your loud tall housemate.

-You and Richie actually flew out to Stan’s wedding, and while your first love was gone, there were no ill feelings from either of you. You shared a dance with him at the reception and told him how much you approved of his new wife. It meant a lot to him.

-After the wedding, you start to drift from Stan. Soon you don’t hear from each other at all. Richie was the only loser left for you.

-As much as he hated to say it, Richie saw this as his opportunity. You see, he had cared about you since the bar mitzvah. He knew there was someone he loved, but he couldn’t remember who. He guessed because he remembered you so vividly and nothing else, it had to be you. He was respectful of Stan and you, so he had never said anything and kept his distance. With Stan married, and Richie as your roommate (and secretly ruining most of your dates, whether he meant to or not) you were free, and he could hope you’d somehow feel the same.

-You and Richie live it up in Beverly Hills, networking and working side by side; going to celebrity parties and drinking with the big wigs.

-You’ve been tipsy and kissed at these parties, always to fend off unwanted company. It became the perfect cover and a casual display of affection for your closest friend. Despite it being a defence, you once kissed in a taxi after leaving one of these parties. It was a deep and long kiss, and there was no audience for it to be necessary, but it was never spoke of again.

-You became a writer on a semi popular TV series and Richie became a stand up comedian. While you hadn’t gone to school for writing, Richie had encouraged you to go for the job. You had always been good at writing, even minoring in it during college. He helped you prepare and edit scripts. He would even act out scenes in his famous impressions.

-Things were going so well, until one day Mike Hanlon calls. At first, you don’t even remember him until he calls you your old childhood nickname. You have to go back to Derry. IT is back.

-The plane ride is long, and both you and Richie decide to knock a few back in the airport bar and sleep it off on the flight. When you wake up at landing, your head is in the hollow of where his neck and shoulder meet and his arm is around you. Your hands are interlaced. Sure, the two of you had shared beds on road trips and when you’d travel for job auditions, but you had never really snuggled like this. You’re both blushing messes when you get to baggage claim.

-When you finally get back in town, you head straight to the Chinese restaurant in town in the car Richie rents. You recognise everyone immediately, embracing each of them with warmth and love... except for Stan who is nowhere to be seen. Mike assures you that he had contacted him.

-Despite his absence, you all enjoy dinner. You notice Bev and Bill still carry torches for one another after all these years. Ben looks amazing and seems very successful. Mike is even wiser than he was when you were all young. Eddie is still just as hyper and fun to talk to.

-After the meal, you all head off from the restaurant to talk strategy. On the walk out of the building, Bev pulls you back to walk and talk with her. It’s as if nothing has changed and you’re having a sleepover again. She specifically asks if you and Richie are a couple. When you deny this, she laughs and says that’s insane because of how you seem so in love with one another.

-You’d never say it, but you had imagined a life with Richie before. You can’t really be roommates with someone you have such a bond with without thinking of these things. But late at night when you can’t sleep you think about how nice it would be to have his arms around you, pressed into his lean and warm chest. There have been times when he’s brought people back, and he has a type in the people he brings home. A lot of them either share your name, or Eddie’s. You realize this isn’t a coincidence that you’d hear him calling out these names. Tozier sounded like a nice title to gain. It would be fun to see his last name, even hyphenated, on yours in any of your writing credits. But you’re snapped out of your thoughts the second Bev gets through on the line she’s trying to reach Stan at.

-Patricia was on the line; she said Stan had slit his wrists in the bathtub just an hour earlier. IT had been written on the wall in his blood. This makes your blood run cold. You can’t even react for a good five minutes even though everyone is watching you very carefully.

-The day you had all made that blood pact, Stan had made an off handed joke about slitting your wrists instead of just your hands. It had made you uncomfortable then, but scares the shit out of you now.

-When you finally do react, it’s like your whole world crumbles. You think you might be screaming, you know you’re definitely crying. You don’t even realize you’ve fled past all of the other losers cars until Richie’s arms are around you and he’s pressing you close to him on the curb.

-He let’s you scream it out, let’s you dig your nails into his skin until he bleeds, let’s you soak his nice dress shirt with tears and spit. Anything to comfort you and be close to you. This is the most thankful you’ve ever been for Richard Tozier.

-When you’ve stopped crying, there’s a newfound hate in your heart. You’re going to kill IT and it’s never going to hurt anyone ever again. You vow to avenge Stanley Uris. The group can’t disagree, even though half of them want to run. You all vow that before tomorrow is over, the clown will die.

-Richie and Eddie tell you how much they want to leave, and they try to get you to leave as well. But between your need for vengeance and Bill and Mike’s ranting about a strategy to kill IT, they don’t end up leaving town. That night, you can’t sleep. You aren’t sure how, maybe it’s a trick of IT’s illusions, but somehow you end up in Richie’s bed. It’s restless and you’re both terrified, but you cling together in solidarity and something stronger than lifelong friendship. But by the time he wakes you’re gone already, looking for your token to burn.

-You find it in the clubhouse, hidden behind one of the wooden boards nailed to the floor. It’s the little paper program from Stan’s bar mitzvah. An important day that quite literally changed your whole life.

-Upon returning to the townhouse, you find It nearly empty, with Eddie patching up a hole in his face. He’s mumbling something about the library while he’s finishing sanitizing his wound, so that’s where the two of you head when he’s done.

-Richie is shaken after killing Bowers, and now it’s your turn to comfort him. He shakes as you slip your arm around his, guiding him as he walks. Your other hand squeezes his bicep every few minutes to remind him to breathe. You’re here, and you’ve got him. It helps.

-Returning to Neibolt fills you with all of the memories you’d struggled to remember the day before. All of the fear and isolation of your childhood filled you so completely that you thought you could be sick. But you enter anyway, nausea and all.

-seeing IT take the form of Stan’s body is what does it for you though. You’re doubled over vomiting and crying, your hands sting against the broken glass and splinters on the floor. You’re only half aware of the chaos going around you until Richie kicks what you can only describe as a spider with Stan’s head and razor sharp teeth away from you. And then everything is so horrifyingly clear. This is only the beginning; it will get worse. When the head spider attacks Richie, you try to pull it off of him, but you aren’t strong enough. It’s up to Eddie, but Eddie is frozen.

-Down in the sewers is even worse. The fight takes a larger toll on all of you than expected. Eddie finally abandons all of the fear he cling to his entire life and charged head first into the fight, only to be stabbed through the torso and not get back up. You’re bloodied by one of IT’s claws, your wrist probably broken and one of your legs is in agony, so much so that you have to fight to stand while dodging the giant spider monster in it’s true form. All of you are injured in some way but team work weakens the creature.

-ripping out IT’s heart and destroying it should have been the end of all of the horror, and at first you think it is. You’re all relieved, until you notice Eddie hasn’t gotten up. Eddie and Richie had always had a special bond. You knew this better than anyone. He was the first one to Eddie’s side and held him as he tried to get him to respond.

-Eddie Kaspbrak is dead, and you can feel Richie’s heart breaking beside you. You hold his hand as he goes, and the rest of the losers hold each other. Richie presses a long kiss to his face, finally allowing tears to fall for the first time in the lifetime you’ve known him. It hurts even more knowing you can’t carry his body out of this place.

-As you leave the sewers, something changes. It’s as if the curse on you all has finally been lifted. You know you all have to go back to real life and finally live without fear, but fear is all any of you have ever known. The water of the quarry is healing to all of you, in the physical case of soothing aching muscles, and spiritually. It’s a rebirth.

-Richie cries again in the water, and you all come together to hold him. Under the water you feel a hand grasp yours, and you don’t even have to open your eyes to know that it’s Richies hand.

-Much to yours, and i think everyone’s surprise, Bev leaves with Ben. You could have sworn you heard her going at it with Bill the other night. Bill stays in town another week to recover before leaving and starting to work on his next novel. Mike resumes his life without the burden of watching Derry for ITs return, even more wise than he ever had been. You and Richie were another story.

-The second he saw you bleed in the sewer, he had gone berserk. Nothing else had mattered in that moment but destroying the thing that hurt you and Eddie. He knew after that he couldn’t ignore his feelings any longer. If his past love was gone, he had to pursue his future.

-He is uncharacteristically quiet on the way to the airport, and without speaking you know why. You’re all each other has now.

-He parks, gets out, walks around and opens the car door for you. Before you can reach for your suitcase, he reaches for you. The kiss is sobering yet intoxicating all at the same time. His hands rake through your hair and your arms rise up and wrap around his neck. The only reason to stop is the lack of oxygen that leaves you both dizzy. For once in your life, neither of you need to talk to be heard.

-The flight home feels weightless. You’re joking and lighthearted and giddy. If you weren’t as clear minded you could have sworn there was music in the air.

-When you arrive home, you decide to convert one of your bedrooms into a guest room. Stan’s letter to you both is framed in the living room. For once, you fall asleep peacefully. You fall asleep next to your best friend, your soulmate.

——————

Request anything you’d like to see! My ask box is open!

#my work #richie x reader #richie tozier x reader #richie tozier #it chapter 2

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where-theres-smoak-2 · 4 years ago

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Riverdale 5x02 Review.

So I’m really late with this review I know, to be honest I was undecided about whether I was even going to write it because well this wasn’t my favourite episode and I try to avoid being too negative and this review did feel like I was being very negative and repeating alot of the issues that I had brought up in other posts and reviews but ultimately I decided that I had said I was going to review Season 5 and despite it not being my favourite episode I thought there were still some really great moments in there which I would like to talk about but overall I do feel like there were some plotlines that were too rushed and just not fleshed out properly. Also I can’t watch episode 3 until tomorrow morning where I am it’s like 1 am at the moment so figured I’d kill the time by writing this. But anyway lets get into it and as always these are just my own opinions you are welcome to disagree but please be respectful and obviously there are spoilers.

Archie

So first I want to talk about Archie’s storyline. So here’s the thing I kind of feel like Archie has had PTSD since the blackhood shot his dad all the way back in season 2. I think each new bad thing that happened only contributed to it, going to jail and being forced to fight in the underground ring, being attacked by the bear and nearly dying, the whole survive the night thing with penelope, then his dad being killed by a reckless kid. Just one of those things would be traumatising let alone all of them at once. I also feel like he has never really dealt with any of that trauma properly until this episode when it all just spills over. I think KJ did an amazing job with this storyline. I think alot of his pain this episode stems from his father’s death. Archie is having all these big milestones that he should be sharing with his father but can’t. I mean he’s just had prom without his dad there, graduation is coming up and so Archie who already misses his dad is probably missing him even more. Then on top of that he gets this video tape that takes him right back to when he felt the weakest and he has to confront all of the anger and pain that wells back up again. To start wth Archie tries to work through the feelings with physical excerise, punching his boxing bag or going for a run, working out in his gym but when that doesn’t help he starts to have angry outbursts. I mean Archie has alot on his plate at the moment, not only is he trying to work through his feelings about his dad not being there for these big moments , he doesn’t know yet if he’s even going to be able to graduate with his friends and then there’s the whole having feelings for betty and veronica and that mess plus his mum asking if he wants to write the letter for the guy who killed his dad. I think Archie said it best when Betty asked him if something was wrong and he replied what isn’t wrong. Also I’m sorry to say this but a really hated that scene. Not because of Archie snapping at Betty but because it made me a little irritated at Betty. I mean Betty at this point knows that Veronica found the song Archie wrote for Betty and that he doesn’t know if he’s going to graduation and she’s standing there with her arms wrapped around the guy she chose over Archie asking him if there is something wrong, I don’t know it just seemed like both an insenistive and kinda dumb thing for Betty to say. I want to make it clear that I’m not hating on Betty here we all have flaws and I think its more an issue with the writing than anything else but yeah that scene irritated me a bit. Also it did show us that whilst Veronica is still very much sticking to the lets pretend everything is fine plan Archie clearly is not comfortable with the plan and it does seem to me like he feels alot of guilt about lying. In my opinion Archie is the kind that whilst he makes mistakes he likes to own up to them and tell the truth so not telling Jughead the truth doesn’t feel right to him and I think this is frustrating him and the only reason he hasn’t come clean is because of Betty. Another issue I had with Archie’s storyline this episode is something that I’ve talked about before several times and it’s one of the shows biggest flaws in my opinion which is the storylines and characters not crossing over at all. I mean its pretty obvious in this scene that Archie is struggling at the moment and you’d think that having seen this his friends would reach out to him and try to support him and yet just like last episode there is practically no interaction between the core four in this episode. I mean even something as simple as one of them trying to ring Archie and him not picking up and then one them saying they are worried about him would do, something as little as a couple of lines of dialogue to show that his friends are concerned for him but instead it just came across as his friends either didn’t care about what he was going through or were too wrapped up in their own lives to notice that Archie needed them.

One of my favourite scenes was when Mr Augustine comes to see Archie and ask him to write the letter for his son instead and Archie makes that speech about how he understands that his son made a mistake when he hit his dad and that it was something Archie could have done himself but that the one thing Archie wouldn’t have done was keep driving. I do think this is true like I said before Archie is someone who will own up to and try to make his mistakes right. I think this scene also really showed how much pain Archie is in and how he is struggling with forgiving the son despite understanding that the son had made a mistake. I just think KJ’s acting in this scene was soo good and he hit the right balance between anger and pain.

Another scene that I thought was really heartbreaking was when Archie comes home and finds his mum watching the tape. I just felt so bad for Mary seeing what Fred and Archie went through because of the Black Hood and her realising just how much trauma her son was keeping inside. My heart really broke for her when she said ‘I need to know what’s going on inside of you.’ This poor woman can see how much her son is struggling but he’s keeping it all inside and I know how scaring it is when you know someone is in pain but they are hiding it and you don’t know what’s going on inside their head. Also I find it so sad that Archie still feels like he was a coward and that he let his dad down. It’s after this conversation that Archie really goes over the edge though and smashes up the tv and then his uncle shows up and I think his uncle knew whated he needed, that he needed to get the anger out however I’m not so sure the method of letting Archie beat the living crap out of him was the best but I spose it seemed to work and again it really wrenched at my heart when Archie finally broke down crying hugging his uncle also I did get chills when the camera panned to the punching bag and you see that its covered in blood where Archie has been hitting it so much that his hands have bled.

Ok so now I want to talk about my absolute favourite part of the episode, Archie’s letter to the judge. I full on teared up when I heard it like everything about it was perfect and I just know Fred would have been so proud of his son for writing it but the one line that really made me cry was the line ‘Fred Andrews believed in lifting up those around him and in second chances.’ If you could sum up Fred Andrews in one sentence it would be this one because Fred was always supporting those around him and trying to help them achieve their best.

Charles and The Auteur Mystery

If Archie’s storyline was my favourite of the episode then this was my least favourite. My biggest issue with it was how rushed it was also the reveals were really underwhelming in my opinion. So this sotryline is kicked off with Betty and Jughead getting a call at 3am from Bret telling them he has information and asking to be moved to Solitary. But when Betty and Jughead go to visit him the next day and discover he’s been brutally murdered. At first they think it was David who killed him but then David himself shows up dead in what looks like an apparent suicide. But then the mystery thickens when Donna calls Betty afraid and on the run because someone is killing the Stonies and tells Betty that Joan is dead too and she thinks she is next and that it is connected to them trying to kill Jughead. Betty of course is having none of it and puts the phone down on her. But the next day she trys to get a hold of Joan and finds out that she really was killed by someone bashing her head in with a rock. So we reach the reveal of Charles being a serial killer. I full on rolled my eyes at this reveal. I hated it no other way to put it I just straight up hated and not just because I really like Charles’ character and seeing his relationship with Jughead and Betty grow but because it made little sense and wasn’t properly explored. To me it almost seemed like they got to this episode and then suddenly remembered that plot point where Charles visited Chic in prison and thought crap how do we explain that oh I know lets just have him murder some people in this episode and say he’s a serial killer that’s shocking right? Except it wasn’t shocking at all. Especially when by this point in the episode Hermosa had killed three people and Penelope had wiped out at least six people who happened to be her own family all because they weren’t letting her daughter get her own way. And then they expect me to be shocked that Charles killed two people and asked his boyfriend to kill a third. Also at least Charles had a fairly decent motive unlike Penelope, he killed the Stonies because they had tried to hurt his little brother and pin it on his little sister and most of them got away with it and he killed David because he was helping Bret but I also think that him letting Jelly Bean have access to those tapes could have played a part into it, I mean it is like Charles says he only kills horrible people who hurt the ones that he loves, and he does seem to be very protective of his siblings, it’s sweet in a very dark twisted kind of way. But like I said this plotline had no build up at all. I mean the whole Stonie’s murder mystery was started and ended in this episode they could have done it so much better just by moving things around a little. If they had revealed that Joan had been killed in an earlier epsiode for example. Maybe right after Jughead discovered the tape of masked Betty hitting masked Jughead over the head. How much creepier would have been for them to see that tape and then right after find out that Joan had been killed by a rock to the head? Not only would it have heighted the mystery of the tapes but it would have introduced the new mystery of who was killing the preppy’s sooner. Then they could have had Bret die 5x01 after Betty and Jughead went to see him they could have gotten that phone call they got in this episode and then found out he had been killed. Then have the final murder have David happen in this episode and the reveal that Charles was the one behind it. The mystery would only have been a few episodes longer but at least it woul dhave given us as an audience time to one get invested in the mystery and two actually wonder who could be behind it like we did with the video tapes. Also another thing that disappointed me was the lack of reaction from Charles’ family, like they hardly react at all, we don’t see Alice and FP’s reaction to the news either so again that was really underwhelming. But I think the thing that bothers me the most about this particular storyline is that if you took it out it would make no difference to the plot. Like this plot point of Charles being a serial killer changed nothing and was so unnecessary. But it’s ok I know a way they can fix this (just as a disclaimer they are not going to do this but its a fun idea so) I am chosing to believe that there is another twist to the story and that actually Charles is a victim and actually innocent in this, I’m choosing to believe that the Farmies, through Chic hypnotised Charles to kill the Stonies and David because Evelyn was working with them in the plot to kill Jughead and frame Betty and when they heard Bret was talking to Betty and Jughead they decided to tie up some loose ends and get rid of the Stonies. Also they wanted to get revenge on Betty and Alice for their roles in Edgar’s death and Evelyn’s imprisonment and so decided taking Charles away from them was the right price for them to pay. Yes I know it’s got some holes in it but I still think it’s a better storyline than the one we got so I’m sticking with it. In all seriousness though despite not likely how his character turned out I do hope we see Charles again. It is possible that maybe a little down the line they’ll give him a redemption arc I mean in Riverdale is murder really that terrible of a crime? I think the saddest part for me about this reveal is that I feel like Charles played a big part in helping Betty overcome her fears around having the serial killer genes because she knew her big brother had them too and he had his stuff together and was a respected FBI agent and if he could live a normal life and not go around killing everyone because he has these genes then she can too. Now they’ve taken that away from her which is probably going to make her doubt again and make her feel like a ticking timebomb. I just don’t think its necessary to make every person who comes into these characters lives evil. Also it is a rehash of the whole evil brother thing that they did with Chic and I said way back when Charles first started acting a little shady that I hoped they wouldn’t do a repeat of that storyline because that’s just boring and that’s exactly what they did. It would have just been so much more interesting to have him be morally grey but not a full out phsycho who kills people. Anyway I think I have ranted on long enough about this topic so lets move on to another underwhelming plot reveal.

Jelly Bean is behind the tapes. See this is one that really should have been shocking. But again the way it was written just made it seem so underwhelming. Like the reason for her doing it was so weak, she didn’t want Jughead to go to college. Also I wasn’t hyped on the way the characters just shrugged it off like she full on terroised the whole town not just Jughead she brought Archie’s trauma back up causing him to pretty much have a break down this episode so she better march herself over to the Andrews house with a really good apology and start saving up to buy them a new TV because that’s the least she could do. Instead she just says she’s sorry to FP and gets a hug. I get the whole message they are saying here that Riverdale has created this situation were kids are doing really dark things but because of the amount of trauma they are put through they have got to the point when they themselves don’t even recognise when they are doing something really dark. I just think it could have been better written. Especially because other than Jelly Bean we didn’t know who any of the other people are in those videos. They mention that she had been hanging out with Ricky again and he was the one who started helping her with the tapes, they could have easily put a scene or two in where we saw them hanging out together even if it was just quick shots of them in the background of other scenes like we spot them sitting together in a booth at Pop’s. At least that would have given some build up to the reveal but again like Charles’ it kinda came out of nowhere. Also is it just me or are there a lot of people invested in what’s going on with Jughead I mean there’s Jelly Bean making the tapes, Charles murdering people for even daring to attempt to hurt a hair on his baby brother’s head and Veronica who pretending to still be with her ex to spare Jughead the pain of knowing his girlfriend cheated on him. Look I love Juggie too I’m just not sure he’s worth this much trouble especially as they are doing more to make his life more complicated than making things better for him as they are intending. Come on guys Juggie is a big boy you’ve got to let him deal with his own problems. Also as a side note I did find it kind of funny that when Jughead decided to tell FP about Jelly Bean he took his alcoholic Father for drinks, though it does look like whilst Jughead is drinking alcohol FP looks like he’s drinking water.

Blossom and Lodge Family Drama

Ok these two plotlines I’ll be honest I didn’t care a whole lot about it was just kind of the same old stuff we’ve seen before. I did like the Lodge woman all banding together and standing up to Hiram and I love that Hermione finally grew a backbone and decided to divorce Hiram. But I must confess their plot to overthrow Hiram and the way they went about it was kind of dark I mean Hermosa literally arranged to have their own father beat up. I do think that maybe Hermosa has an ulterior motive to wanting to overthrow Hiram and if she sticks around in season 5 I could see her becoming an even worse villan than Hiram though it does seem like from some interviews with KJ that Hiram is going to be taking all that extra time to make Riverdale even more of a mess than it is already so we’ve got that to look forward to.

As for the Blossom storyline again I didn’t care a great deal about it. I think it’s sweet that Cheryl is trying to right the wrongs her family has committed over the years by creating sanctuary land for the Uktena people. I also find it hilariuosly over the top that when they refuse and Cheryl tells her mother her mother’s respose is to just straight up kill them all. Especially as Penelope usually only does something if it benefits her and I’m not really sure how this will benefit Penelope unless it’s just an oppurtunity to revenge kill the family. Again I feel like there is probably more to this plotline and that it is somehow going to come back to bite Cheryl in the butt but only time will tell. Other than that I don’t really have much to say about these storylines.

Theories for episode 3

So my theories for 5x03 are

1) FP will leave Riverdale with Jelly Bean to protect her from the town’s corruption and hopefully get her plenty of therapy.

2) Betty will finally tell Jughead about her kiss with Archie. I really hope she is the one to tell him and that he doesn’t hear it from someone else. And I also really hope that he does find out because it’s starting to seem like he won’t and I don’t think that’s fair to Jughead and honestly will make me think less of Betty.

3) Betty and Jughead will break up realising that with the distance they won’t make it especially as the trust between them has broken due to her kissing Archie again, if he can’t trust her when they are in the same town then how can they make it work when they are apart.

4) Betty and Archie still won’t talk to each other and that’s gonna really annoy me. I mean they’ve only been friends since childhood so why would they need a one on one scene right.

5) Kevin and Fangs might finally confirm their relationship.

6) There are going to be lots of moments that are going to make me cry.

7) There will be no mention of Charles or the effect him being a serial killer had on the family at all.

8) Cheryl will be arrested for her uncle and maybe the rest of her family’s murders.

9) There will be lots of references to Fred and maybe Archie saying goddbye at his grave before leaving for the army and that’s defo going to make me cry.

10) The last few minutes of the episode will be a flashforward of Betty with the gun and will set up the new mystery.

So that’s it for now, I’m gonna be staying out of the Riverdale tag now as like I said earlier I’m not going to be able to watch the episode for hours yet where I am it doesn’t come on to Netflix til about 8-10am in the UK.

#riverdale #riverdale review

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themousefromfantasyland · 4 years ago

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"Dark Christmas"

By Jeanette Winterson

So, people used to tell ghosts stories during the holidays. During my last posts about Christmas creatures and hidden holiday lore, I talked about this amazing, but sadly forgotten holiday tradition, and how we should bring it back. So, consider this my contribution.

I searched for a good Christmas ghost story to share, and I found a good one here

So here it comes:

We had borrowed the house from a friend none of us seemed to know.

Highfallen House stood on an eminence overlooking the sea. It was a square Victorian gentleman's residence. The large bay windows looked down through the pines towards the shore. Six stone steps led the visitor up to the double front door where a gothic bell-pull released a loud mournful clang deep into the distances of the house.

Laurel lined the drive. The stable block was disused. The walled garden had been locked up in 1914 when the gardeners went to war. Only one had returned. I had been warned that the high brick wall enclosing the garden was unsafe. As I passed it slowly in the car, I saw a faded notice falling off the paint-peeled door. DO NOT ENTER.

I was the first to arrive. My friends were following by train and I was to collect them the next day and then we would settle down to Christmas.

I had driven from Bristol and I was tired. There was a Christmas tree roped on the top of my 4x4 and a trunk-load of provisions. We were not near any town. But the housekeeper had left stacked wood to build a fire and I had brought a shepherd's pie and a bottle of rioja for my first night.

The kitchen was cheerful enough once I had got the fire going and the radio playing while I unpacked our festive supplies. I checked my phone – no signal. Still, I knew the time of the train tomorrow and it was a relief to feel that the world had gone away. I put my food in the oven to heat up, poured a glass of wine, and went upstairs to find myself a bedroom.

The first landing had three bedrooms leading off it. Each had a moth-eaten rug, a metal bed and a mahogany chest of drawers. At the far end of the landing was a second set of stairs up to the attic floor.

I am not romantic about maids' rooms or nurseries, and there was something about that second set of stairs that made me hesitate. The landing was bright in the sudden way of late sun on a winter's afternoon. Yet the light ended abruptly at the foot of the stairs as though it couldn't go any farther. I didn't want to be near that set of stairs, so I chose the room at the front of the house.

As I went to bring up my bag, the house bell started to ring, its jerky metallic hammers sounding somewhere in the guts of the house. I was surprised but not alarmed. I expected the housekeeper. I opened the door. There was no one there. I went down the steps and looked round. I admit I was frightened. The night was clear and soundless. There was no car in the distance. No footsteps walking away. Determined to conquer my fear, I walked round a little. Then, turning back to the house, I saw it; the bell wire ran along the side of the house under a sheltering gutter. Perhaps 30 or 40 bats were dangling upside down on the vibrating wire. The same number swooped and swerved in a dark mass. Obviously their movement on the wire had set off the bell. I like bats. Clever bats. Good. Now supper.

I ate. I drank. I wondered why love is so hard and life is so short. I went to bed. The room was warmer now and I was ready to sleep. The sound of the sea ebbed into the flow of my dreams.

I woke from a dead sleep in dead darkness to hear… what? What can I hear? It sounded like a ball bearing or a marble rolling on the bare floor above my head. It rolled hard on hard then hit the wall. Then it rolled again in the other direction. This might not have mattered except that the other direction was upwards. Things can come loose and roll downwards, but they cannot come loose and roll up. Unless someone…

That thought was so unwelcome that I dismissed it along with the law of gravity. Whatever was rolling over my head must be a natural dislodging. The house was draughty and unused. The attics were under the eaves where any kind of weather might get in. Weather or an animal. Remember the bats. I pulled the covers up to my eyebrows and pretended not to listen.

There it was again: hard on hard on hit on pause on roll.

I waited for sleep, waiting for daylight.

We are lucky, even the worst of us, because daylight comes.

It was a brooding day that 21st of December. The shortest day of the year. Coffee, coat on, car keys. Shouldn't I just check the attic?

The second set of stairs was narrow – a servants' staircase. It led to a lath and plaster corridor barely a shoulder-width wide. I started coughing. Breathing was difficult. Damp had dropped the plaster in thick, crumbling heaps on the floorboards. As below, there were three doors. Two were closed. The door to the room above my room was ajar. I made myself go forward.

The room was under the eaves as I had guessed. The floor was rough. There was no bed, only a washstand and a clothes rail.

What surprised me was the nativity scene in the corner.

Standing about two feet tall, it was more like a doll's house than a Christmas decoration. Inside the open-fronted stable stood the animals, the shepherds, the crib, Joseph. Above the roof, on a bit of wire, was a battered star. It was old, handmade in a workmanlike but not craftsmanlike sort of way, the painted wood now rubbed and faded like pigments of time.

I thought I would carry it downstairs and put it by our Christmas tree. It must have been made for the children when there were children here. I stuffed my pockets with the figures and animals, and left quickly, leaving the door open. I had to set off for the station. Stephen and Susie could help me with the rest later.

As soon as I was out of the house, my lungs felt clear again. It must be the plaster dust.

The drive to the station was along the coast road. Lonely and unyielding, the road turned in a series of blind bends and tight corners. I met no one and I saw no one. Gulls circled over the sea.

The station itself was a simple shelter on a long single track. There were no information boards. I checked my phone. No signal.

At last the train appeared distantly down the track. I was excited. Memories of visiting my father as a child when he was stationed at his RAF base give me a rush of pleasure whenever I travel by train or come to meet one.

The train slowed and halted. The guard stood down for a moment. I watched the doors – it wasn't a big train, this branch line train – but none of the doors opened. I waved at the guard who came over.

"I am meeting my friends."

He shook his head. "Train's empty. Next stop is the end of the line."

I was confused. Had they got off at the earlier stop? I described them. The guard shook his head again. "I notice strangers. They would have boarded at Carlisle, asked me where to get off – always do."

"Is there another train before tomorrow?'

"One a day and that's your lot, and more than anybody needs in a place like this. Where are you staying?"

"Highfallen House. Do you know it?"

"Oh aye. We all know it." He looked as if he were about to say something else. Instead, he blew his whistle. The empty train pulled away, leaving me staring down the long track watching the red light like a warning.

I needed to get a signal on my phone.

I drove on past the station, following the steep hill, hoping some height would connect me to the rest of the world. At the top of the hill I stopped the car and got out, pulling up the collar of my coat. The first snow hit my face with insect insistence. Sharp and spiteful, like little bites.

I looked out across the whitening bay. That must be Highfallen House. But what's that? Two figures walking on the beach. Is it Stephen and Susie? Had they driven here after all? Then, as I strained my eyes against the deceit of distance, I realised that the second figure was much smaller than the first. They were walking purposefully towards the house.

When I arrived back, it was nearly dark.

I put on the lights, blew the fire into a blaze. There was no sign of the mysterious couple I had seen from the hill. Perhaps it had been the housekeeper and her daughter come to make sure that everything was all right. I had a telephone number for Mrs Wormwood, but without a signal I could not call her.

The snow was thickening in windy swirls. Relax. Have a whisky.

I leaned on the warm kitchen range with my whisky in my hand. The wooden figures I had brought down from the attic were lying on the kitchen table. I should go up and get the stable.

I don't want to.

I bounded up the first set of stairs using energy to force out unease. At my bedroom I put on the light. That felt better. The second set of stairs stood in shadow at the end of the long landing. I felt that constriction in my lungs again. Why am I holding on to the handrail like an old man?

I could see that the only light to the attic was at the top of the stairs. I found the round brown Bakelite switch. I flicked down the nipple. A single bulb lit up reluctantly. The room was straight ahead. The door was closed. Hadn't I left it open?

I turned the handle and stood in the doorway, the room dimly lit by the light from the stairs. Washstand. Nativity. Clothes rail. On the clothes rail was a child's dress. I hadn't noticed that before. I suppose I had been in a hurry. Pushing aside my misgivings, I went in purposefully and bent down to pick up the wooden nativity. It was heavy and I had just got it secure in my arms when the light on the landing went out.

Hello? Who's there?

There's someone breathing like they can barely breathe. Not faint. Struggling for breath. I mustn't turn round, because whoever or whatever it is, is behind me.

I stood still for a minute, steadying my nerve. Then I shuffled forward towards the edge of light coming up from downstairs. At the doorway I heard a step behind me, lost my balance and put out a hand to steady myself. My hand gripped something wet. The clothes rail. It must be the dress.

My heart was over-beating. Don't panic. Bakelite. Bad wiring. Strange house. Darkness. Aloneness.

But you're not alone, are you?

Back in the kitchen with whisky, Radio 4 and pasta boiling, I examined the dress. It was for a small child and it was hand-knitted. The wool was smelly and sopping. I washed it out and left it hanging over the sink to drip. I guessed there must be a hole in the roof and the dress had been soaking up the rain for a long time.

I ate my supper, tried to read, told myself it had been nothing, nothing at all. It was only 8pm. I didn't want to go to bed, though the snow outside was like a quilt.

I decided to arrange the nativity. Donkey, sheep, camels, wise men, shepherds, star, Joseph. The crib was there, but it was empty. There was no Christ child. And there was no Mary. Had I dropped them in the dark room? I hadn't heard anything fall and these wooden figures were six inches tall.

Joseph was wearing a woollen tunic, but his wooden legs had painted puttees. I pulled off the tunic. Underneath, wooden Joseph wore a painted uniform. First world war.

When I turned him round, I saw there was a gash in his back like a stab wound.

My phone beeped.

I dropped Joseph, grabbed the phone. It was a text message from Susie. TRYING 2 CALL U. LEAVE 2MORO.

I pressed CALL. Nothing. I tried to send a text. Nothing. But what did it matter? Suddenly I felt relief and calm. They had been delayed, that was all. Tomorrow they would be here.

I sat down again with the nativity. Perhaps the missing figures were inside. I put in my hand. My fingers closed round a metal object. It was a small iron key with a hoop top. Maybe it was the key to the attic door.

Outside, snow had fallen snow on snow. The sky had cleared. The moon sped above the sea.

I had gone to bed and I was deep asleep when I heard it clearly. Above me. Footsteps. Pacing. Down the room. Hesitate. Turn. Return.

I lay in bed, eyes staring blindly at the blind ceiling. Why do we open our eyes when we can't see anything? And what was there to see? I don't believe in ghosts.

I wanted to put on the light, but what if the light didn't come on? Why would it be worse to be in darkness I had not chosen than darkness I was choosing? But it would be worse. I sat up in bed and pulled back the curtain a little. The moon had been so bright tonight, surely there would be light?

There was light. Outside the house, hand in hand, stood the still and silent figures of a mother and child.

I did not sleep again till daylight, and when I slept and woke again, it was almost midday and already the light was lowering.

Hurrying to get coffee, I saw that the dress was gone. I had left it dripping over the sink and it was gone. Get out of the house.

I set off for the station. There was an air frost that had coated the trees in glittering white. It was beautiful and deathly. The world held in ice.

On the road there were no car tracks. No noise but the roar and drop of the sea.

I moved slowly and saw no one. In the white, unmoving landscape, I wondered if there was anyone else left alive?

At the station, I waited. I waited some time past the time until the train whistled on the track. The train stopped. The guard got down and saw me. He shook his head. "There's no one," he said. "No one at all."

I thought I would cry. I took out my mute phone. I flashed up the message. TRYING TO CALL U. LEAVE 2MORO.

The guard looked at it. "Happen it's you who should be leaving," he said. "There's no more trains past Carlisle now till the 27th. Tomorrow was the last and that's been cancelled. Weather."

I wrote down a number and gave it to the guard. "Will you phone my friends and tell them I am on my way home?"

On the slow journey back to Highfallen House, I filled my mind with my departure. It would be slow and dangerous to travel at night, but I could not consider another night alone. Or not alone.

All I had to do was manage 40 miles to Inchbarn. There was a pub and a guesthouse and remote but normal life.

The text message kept playing in my head. Had it really meant that I should leave? And why? Because Susie and Stephen couldn't come? Weather? Illness? It's all a guessing game. The fact is, I have to go.

The house seemed subdued when I returned. I had left the lights on and I went straight upstairs to pack my bag. At once I saw that the light to the attic was on. I paused. Breathed. Of course it's on. I never switched it off. That proves it's a wiring fault. I must tell the housekeeper.

My bag packed, I threw the food into a box and put everything back in the car. I had the whisky in the front, a blanket I stole from the bed, and I made a hot-water bottle, just in case.

It was only five o'clock. At worst I'd be in Inchbarn by 9pm.

I got in the car and turned the key. The radio came on for a second, died, and as the ignition clicked and clicked, I knew that the battery was flat. Two hours ago at the station, the car had started first time. Even if I had left the lights on… But I hadn't left the lights on. A cold panic hit me. I took a swig of the whisky. I couldn't sleep in the car all night. I would die.

I don't want to die.

Back in the house, I wondered what I was going to do all night. I must not fall asleep. I had noticed some old books and volumes when I had explored downstairs yesterday – assorted dusty adventure stories and tales of empire. As I sorted through them, I came across a faded velvet photograph album. In the cold, deserted sitting room, I began to discover the past.

Highfallen House 1910. The women in long skirts with miraculous waists. The men in shooting tweeds. The stable boys in waistcoats, the gardening boys wearing flat caps. The maids in starched aprons. And here they are again in their Sunday best: a wedding photograph. Joseph and Mary Lock. 1912. He was a gardener. She was a maid. In the back of the album, loose and unsorted, were further photographs and newspaper cuttings. 1914. The men in uniform. There was Joseph.

I took the album back into the kitchen and put it next to my wooden solider. I had on my coat and scarf. I propped myself up in two chairs by the wood-fired range and dozed and waited and waited and dozed.

It was perhaps two o'clock when I heard a child crying. Not a child who has scraped his knee, or lost a toy, but an abandoned child. A child whose own voice is his last hold on life. A child who cries and knows that no one will come.

The sound was not above me – it was above the above me. I knew where it was coming from.

I put my hands over my ears and my head between my knees. I could not shut out the sound; a locked-up child, a hungry child, a child who is cold and wet and frightened.

Twice I got up and went to the door. Twice I sat down again.

The crying stopped. Silence. A dreadful silence.

I raised my head. Footsteps were coming down the stairs. Not one foot in front of the other, but one foot dragging slightly, then the other joining it, steadying, stepping again.

At the bottom of the stairs, the footsteps paused. Then they did what I knew they would do with all the terror in my body. The footsteps came towards the kitchen door. Whatever was out there was standing 12 feet away on the other side of the door. I stood behind the table and picked up a knife.

The door swung open with violent force that rammed the brass doorknob into the plaster of the wall. Wind and snow blew into the kitchen, whirling up the photographs and cuttings on the table. I saw that the front door itself was wide open, the entrance hall like a wind tunnel.

Holding the knife, I went forward into the hall to shut the door. The pendant metal lantern that hung from the ceiling was swinging wildly on its long chain. A sudden gust lurched it forward like a child's swing pushed too high. It fell back at force against the large semi-circular fanlight over the front door. The fanlight shattered and fell round my shoulders in shards of sharp rain. Flicker. Buzz. Darkness. The house lights were out. No wind now. No cries. Silence again.

Glass-hit in the snow-lit hall, I walked out of the front door and into the night. At the drive, I turned left and I saw them: the mother and child.

The child was wearing the woollen dress. She had no shoes. She held up her arms piteously to her mother, who stood like stone.

I ran forward. I grabbed the child in my arms.

There was no child. I had fallen face down in the snow.

Help me. That's not my voice.

I'm on my feet again. The mother is ahead of me. I follow her. She's going towards the walled garden. She seems to pass through the door, leaving me on the other side.

DO NOT ENTER

I tried the rusty hoop handle. It broke off, taking a piece of door with it. I kicked the door open. It fell off its hinges. The ruined and abandoned garden lay before me. A walled garden of one acre used to feed 20 people. But that was a long time ago.

There were footprints in the snow. I followed them. They led me to the bothy, its roof patched with corrugated iron. There was no door, but the inside seemed dry and sound. There was a tear-off calendar still on the wall: 22 December 1916.

I put my hand in my pocket and I realised that the key from the nativity was there. At the same time, I heard a chair scrape on the floor in the room beyond. I had no fear any more. As the body first shivers and then numbs with cold, my feelings were frozen. I was moving through shadows as one who dreams.

In the room beyond there was a low fire lit in the tiny tin fireplace. On either side of the fire sat the mother and child. The child was absorbed playing with a marble. Her bare feet were blue, but she did not seem to feel the cold any more than I did.

Are we dead then?

The woman with the shawl over her head looked at me with deep expressionless eyes. I recognised her. It was Mary Lock. She nodded at me, or at not me, at some other me in some other time, I do not know. Her gaze went to a tall cupboard. I knew that my key fitted this cupboard and that I must open it. I did so.

A dusty uniform fell out, crumpling like a puppet. The uniform was not quite empty of its occupant. The back of the faded wool jacket had a long slash where the lungs would have been.

I looked at the knife in my hand.

"Open the door! Are you in there? Open the door!"

I woke to blinding white. Where am I? Something's rocking. It's the car. I am in my car. A heavy glove was brushing off the snow. I sat up, found my keys, pressed the unlock button. It was morning. Outside was the guard from the train and a woman who announced herself as Mrs Wormwood.

"Fine mess you've made here," she said.

We went into the kitchen. I was shivering so much that Mrs Wormwood relented and began to make coffee.

"Alfie fetched me," she said, "after he spoke to your friends."

"There's a body," I said. "In the walled garden."

"Is that where it is?" said Mrs Wormwood.

At Christmas 1914, Joseph Lock had gone to war. Before he left for Flanders, he had made a nativity scene for his little girl. When he came back in 1916, he had been gassed. They heard him, climbing the stairs, gasping for breath through froth-corrupted lungs.

His mind had gone, they said. At night in the attic where he slept with his wife and child, he leaned vacantly against the wall, rolling the child's marbles up and down, down and up, pacing, pacing, pacing. One night, just before Christmas, he strangled his wife and daughter. He left them for dead in the bed and went out. But his wife was not dead. She followed him. In the morning, they found her sitting by the nativity, her dress dark with blood, his fingermarks livid at her throat. She was singing a lullaby and pushing the point of the knife into the back of the wooden figure. Joseph was never found.

"Are you going to call the police?" I said.

"What for?" said Mrs Wormwood. "Let the dead bury the dead."

Alfie the guard went out to see to my car. It started first time, the exhaust blue in the white air. I left them clearing up and was about to set off when I remembered I had left my radio in the kitchen. I went back inside. The kitchen was empty. I could hear the two of them up in the attic. I picked up the radio. The nativity was on the table as I had left it.

But it wasn't as I had left it.

Joseph was there and the animals and the shepherds and the worn-out star. And in the centre was the crib. Next to the crib were the wooden figures of a mother and child.

#christmas #holiday season #spooky christmas #christmas ghost stories #ghost story

6 notes · View notes

alj4890 · 5 years ago

Text

Angst Prompt

(Thomas x Amanda) with the request for an alternate look at the Say Goodbye/ I Was On My Way fics.

(Thomas Hunt x oc*Amanda) let's pretend this doesn't exist on my blog.

A/N I know I said I wouldn't do anymore with this heartbreaking storyline. And yet here I am. Again. Sigh. I shared the two other possible ideas for the second part I posted a couple of days ago with bff @krsnlove and being the sweetheart she is, she said I needed to post them. So, here is my darkest version of that story for this couple. I think you will soon know why I didn't choose this version initially. Oh, it hurts. I am so sorry. I'm a fairly positive, happy person in life. I have no idea where these thoughts came from. The third and final one that will be posted shortly is nowhere near the heartache of this one. Warning: pure, terrible, horrible angst from here on out.

First part: Say Goodbye

Second part: I Was On My Way

Third alternate ending: Remedy

Song: Somebody You Loved

Masterlist

@lxaah11 @alleksa16 @penguininapinktuxedo @blackcoffee85 @stopforamoment @krsnlove @cora-nova @bella-ca @hopelessromantic1352 . @sunflowergirl05 @desiree-0816 @greywitchyshots @lilyofchoices @emceesynonymroll @dr-nancy-house @aworldoffandoms @pixieferry @lolablackwrites @i-bloody-love-drake-walker

She's Gone (2nd alternate storyline to I Was On My Way)

"Tomorrow we will focus on scenes twenty-two through--" Thomas glared at Jessica holding her hand up.

"But the royal wedding is tomorrow." She said.

Thomas gripped his notes a little tighter. Addison and Holly shared a worried glance. He swallowed and tried to keep his anger in check. "That is precisely why we will be filming out in the countryside. Everyone will either be glued to their televisions or at the capital to watch the ceremony."

Jessica frowned. "Aren't we going to take advantage of being in Cordonia and watch it? It is a historical moment when royals marry. Couldn't we--"

"NO!" Thomas roared. "If you wish to go to that wedding instead of filming your scenes, Ms. Clark, then that is your choice. Don't expect to be in the rest of the movie if you do." He stormed off.

Jessica stood there with her hanging mouth open in surprise. She looked at Chris and the others. "Did...did I say something wrong?"

Holly sighed while gathering the script copies. "Thomas was in a relationship with the bride."

Jessica's eyes widened. "Oh no. I am so sorry. Should I go to him and--"

Addison shook her head. "Just drop it. He...he will be fine."

____________

Thomas made it back to the manor his friends Hakim and Joelle had insisted he use while in Cordonia. He shut the door to his bedroom and tried to calm down.

He hated being here. If Chris had not needed a couple of weeks off for his father-in-law's funeral, he would be back in Hollywood by now. He had pushed his crew to film as fast as they could. It had all been for nothing. He was stuck in the country that the woman he loved lived in.

He set his notes down and sat on the edge of the bed. He lowered his head in his hands. He couldn't believe that in less than twenty-four hours, Amanda would be marrying Liam. How had his decision to walk away from her resulted in this?

He rubbed his hands over his face as he went to the wet bar. He poured himself a drink and turned the television on. Any distraction from his tortured thoughts would be welcomed.

Breaking News: An attack on King Liam and Lady Amanda Bridgerton resulted in another member of the Sons of the Earth being captured. The man attempted to shoot Lady Amanda while she was out with King Liam in the capital this evening. Our heroic King knocked her to the ground, saving her from harm. News 14 has obtained raw footage taken from a bystander.

Thomas stared in horror at the crowd surrounding Amanda and Liam. She had a strained smile on her face as she thanked people congratulating her on her upcoming wedding. Liam was scanning the crowd when a man with blonde hair and glasses stepped forward and raised a gun to Amanda's chest. He yelled out that there was only one rightful king of Cordonia and pulled the trigger.

Amanda let out a muffled scream when Liam knocked her to the ground. A flurry of activity occurred as guards, Drake, and Maxwell chased after the man. Thomas moved closer to the tv and tried to see if she was truly okay when she was helped off the ground. Liam kept his arm around her shoulders while quickly walking her to a car. Her face was stark white with terror as she got in.

Thomas grabbed his phone and didn't pause to think as he dialed the all to familiar number. He paced back and forth in his room, praying she would answer.

"Hello? Thomas?"

He stopped in his tracks. "Amanda."

He heard the slight intake of her breath.

"I..." She struggled to get the words out. "How are you?"

He looked down. "Forget about that. I saw the attempt on your life! Are you alright? You weren't injured in the attack were you?"

"I'm fine." She reassured him in a shaky voice.

Thomas ran his hand through his hair as he struggled with his need to see for himself that she was actually fine. He couldn't though. She isn't mine anymore. He had no right to demand to come to her. Hold her. Promise he would never let anything happen to her.

"Are you still there?" She asked, fear tinging her words. "Thomas?"

"I'm here." He replied.

"I...I have to tell you something. Something I should have said when you appeared at the ball a few months ago." She swallowed and tried not to break into sobs.

He pinched the bridge of his nose. "There is nothing that needs to be said. Nothing can be said now." He raised his head and looked out at the moonlit countryside. "We can't--"

"I still love you." She choked out. "When you told me you loved me, I meant to tell you what was in my heart. But..." She sniffed and he could hear her trying to muffle her crying.

He closed his eyes. "But it doesn't change anything."

"I'm so sorry, Thomas." She said between sobs. "I wish it were you that I was marrying tomorrow."

He covered his eyes for a moment. "I do too."

"I...I wish I could see you. I miss you. Do you think--"

"We can't." He clinched his fist. "What good would it do, Amanda? It would only add even more pain."

She struggled against the emotions choking her. "I understand."

He sat back down on the bed. "I wish you nothing but happiness." He started to say more but she let out a slightly hysterical laugh.

"You were my happiness." She bitterly confessed.

Thomas froze at her outburst. He wanted to see her. Touch her, even if it was for the very last time. "Amanda, I--" He heard voices in the background, snapping him out of that impulsive frame of mind.

"I'm sorry, but I have to go. I am needed downstairs." She quickly said.

Thomas swallowed. "Wait."

"Yes?" She said with a hint of hope.

"I meant every word that night outside of the palace." He said softly. "I will always mean it."

"Thomas." She whispered. Impatient voices could be heard in the background. "I have to go."

"Goodbye." He said.

"I...I'm sorry. I can't say goodbye to you." She quickly ended the call

He lowered his head back into his hands.

______________

The next day, he worked nonstop. If the crew stopped to eat or take a short break, he reviewed what had been filmed so far. After a late dinner alone and demands that no one disturb him the rest of the evening, he returned to his room and reluctantly turned the television on.

He expected to see reports on the wedding and reception. He had not expected to see frantic people scrambling for answers.

Breaking News: Local Authorities are working with INTERPOL and the King's Guard to locate and rescue Queen Amanda and Lady Olivia Nevarkis. Sources from the palace report that King Liam received a ransom note for the two around eight o'clock this evening. The Queen and duchess were kidnapped from the wedding reception. The Sons of the Earth claim responsibility for these disappearances.

Thomas grabbed his phone and tried to call her. When the call went directly to voice mail, he left a message begging her to call him as soon as she could.

He paced around his room. Why didn't he meet with her last night? Why didn't he try and stop this farce of a wedding? Why didn't he say he loved her once more instead of that asinine way of letting her know?

He grabbed a decanter and glass. He sat down in front of the television and drank as he flipped from one news station to the next, hoping one would show something that she was safe.

An hour later, he was summoned to the palace. Holly and Addison wanted to go with him, but he refused their requests. Holly argued with him until he snapped at her.

"I don't have time for this!" He yelled at her. "Stay here and handle things for me with the film." He hurried to the waiting car and left the two friends staring as he was driven away.

When he arrived at the palace, he was surprised to be greeted by the queen mother. Regina escorted him to a private study. Her usual cool demeanor softened. "Mr. Hunt, forgive me if I am being presumptuous, but I thought you might wish to be where you can hear news as it comes in."

He thanked her. She gently patted his shoulder before taking a seat near the fireplace. She explained that Liam, Drake, and Maxwell had snuck off to rescue Amanda and Olivia. The Guards and agents were on their way to an abandoned Nevarkis manor.

Thomas listened quietly while the television flashed images of Amanda in her wedding dress. He tried to sit still as speculations continued to be made as to the ladies' whereabouts. He stood up when the the news immediately cut to a live feed. Cameras focused first on a sobbing Olivia being wheeled out on a stretcher.

Reporters yelled questions as a battered Drake walked out with a bruised and bloody Maxwell. Both men were in states of shock. Anton struggled against his handcuffs while yelling out that he would do it again.

Liam walked next to a stretcher. Blood covered his hands and crisp, white, royal uniform. His blue eyes had tears falling as he stared at the strangely still form next to him.

Thomas zeroed in on Amanda lying there on a stretcher. Her long, dark eyelashes lay against her pale cheeks, looking much like she had the times he had watched her sleep. Her lips were slightly parted. Blood covered her chest that did not rise with a single needed breath. No IV's. No EMT working frantically over her. Nothing except her peaceful, lovely face.

Thomas stepped closer to the tv while Regina cried out in alarm at the image. Liam stopped before the cameras and held up a hand for silence. "I..." He swallowed and tried to get the words out. "It is with a heavy heart that I inform you all that..." He pressed his palms to his eyes and took a deep breath. "Queen Amanda has died at the hands of the leader of the Sons of the Earth, Anton Severus." Tears slipped down his cheeks as he struggled to answer questions.

Thomas fell to his knees as he stared in disbelief. "It can't be true." He shook his head. "She can't be dead. She was fine. She survived yesterday's attack. She survived!" He yelled out.

Regina stood and went to him. He shrugged off her comfort. Tears formed in his eyes as he fought against accepting the news. The Queen mother left him alone to tell those that were still in the ballroom.

Thomas bent forward and covered his ears as Liam's words repeated over and over in his mind. Amanda is dead. Gone. She's gone. She's never coming back. He cried out in anguish.

"No." He whispered into the carpet. "She wanted to see me." Thomas realized that another selfish choice of his cost him everything. "She wanted to see me and I refused her!"

He cried out to God to help him. Bring her back to him. Any merciful relief from this hell he had been thrust in.

He felt someone kneel next to him. He looked at Liam and begged him to tell him it wasn't true. He couldn't believe that it was.

Liam took Thomas to the room where each king and queen of Cordonia's was placed at their deaths. The young King watched as the man who truly loved Amanda stumbled toward her and gently touched her cheek. Thomas pressed his lips to her forehead while tears fell.

"I'm so sorry." He repeated to her. "I should have run to you when you said you wanted to see me. Told you every moment I loved you." He pressed her cold hand to his cheek. "I can't make it without you." He continued to plead with her to not leave him without her in this world. He slowly stroked her hair as he spoke of his need for her.

Liam kept his head bowed as he stood guard in the doorway. He glanced up when someone spoke softly to him. He nodded and spoke gently to the one mourning his lost love. "Thomas, we have to let them take her...take her away."

Thomas turned toward the men waiting to prepare her body. He looked back down at the one person he had loved with every fiber of his being. He softly kissed her lips wishing her lashes would flutter open. He wished to see that special smile she always had on her face when he woke her with a kiss. He whispered how much he loved her one last time before letting Liam escort him out.

He leaned against a wall and slid down to the floor. He stared at the closed door to the room where she was being placed in a black bag. He could hear the murmurs and then the zipper close. Wheels squeaked before the door opened. Liam knelt down and placed his hand over his heart as she was rolled past, bowing his head for Cordonia's queen and his closest friend.

Thomas watched it all with tears falling silently. Numbness was setting in. He knew that his heart had been zipped up in that bag. Life as he knew it had ended with her last breath. No hope for happiness remained. Nothing was left for him now.

#choices thomas hunt #thomas hunt rcd #thomas hunt x oc #thomas hunt x amanda #choices the royal romance #choices trr #trr liam #trr drake #trr olivia #trr maxwell #pure angst

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nerdsideofthemedia · 6 years ago

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Bumblebee was always the plan

After seeing a few comments on this, I made a part 2.

I’ve written about this before and I was hoping never to return to this subject, but hanging around RWBY communities has kind of forced my hand. Unfortunately, this probably won’t be the only controversial post I write about RWBY’s fandom.

Even though a huge chunk of the fandom has been convinced Bumblebee was going to happen, there were more than a few people who decided to ignore all the signs. Even after 6×12, there were still people trying to remain in denial, which is fine: you do you, but it’s amazing how then they got upset when BBers turned out not to be interested in believing in their lie. Now, I don’t intend to go through all the moments of foreshadowing for the relationship – there are tons of texts about it – but I am still going to address a few moments to prove that it was heavily hinted at, while also addressing the ignorance towards LGBTQ+ experiences.

The injury

To me, I think Yang’s and Sun’s injuries are everything I should need to prove the likelihood of BB as they contrast the two main Blake ships: Bumblebee and Black Sun. While heroes tend to save many people who are indeed just friends or sometimes not even that, there’s a reason why Superman and Spiderman usually include Lois Lane and MJ (or whoever the love interest is in said film) in the climax – it makes it more personal, raising the stakes. From this perspective, it’s easy to understand the importance given to either by comparing: what the injury was, who caused it, why and Blake’s reaction, thus allowing to conclude which couple was given more weight.

What was the injury? Yang lost an arm and suffered from PTSD. Sun, on the other hand, received a minor injury from which he had almost completely recovered from by the next episode and left no lasting damages. Point Bumblebee. Some have tried to argue that Sun was actually hit by an electric weapon, so he could have died, but, ultimately, what matters is what actually happens, not what could have been. As far as we know, he didn’t even get a limitation in movement.

Who caused it? In Yang’s case, it was Adam, while in Sun’s, it was Ilia. So ex-boyfriend vs friend whose feelings were not reciprocated. This one is a no brainer: again point Bumblebee as the first one is more associated with romance. Yang having her arm cut by Adam linked them. By the way, don’t forget Yang and Adam are foils for each other.

Why? Yang was trying to save Blake, while Sun… questioned Ilia’s being a Faunus. If you want to super charitable with him, I can give you: because Ilia was trying to intimidate Blake into giving her back her scroll. Honestly, it doesn’t really matter because neither scenario holds a candle to the first one. Point Bumblebee.

What was Blake’s reaction? When it was Adam vs Yang, she put herself between them and used her semblance to get the latter to safety. When Sun got injured, instead of putting herself between him and Ilia, she stood still and refused to comply with Ilia’s demand. If you feel tempted to say: well, that’s because Ilia’s not as dangerous as Adam, then I have to say: exactly! She could have been, but the writers decided not to do that. Pretty much like Sun could have been the one being associated with Blake’s ex, but he wasn’t. Again, point Bumblebee.

Bonus points:

The use of the Kuleshov effect when Adam says “I’ll destroy everything you love…”, Yang appears, “starting with her”. I can already hear the screeches “Love doesn’t have to mean romance”. Thanks dude, I know. This is where looking at the rest of the scene comes in: it’s why I compared the scene where Yang gets injured to the one with Sun. The writers could have chosen to phrase it differently like “I’ll destroy everything you care about”, but they didn’t. Also, in V5, they got the opportunity to associate that word with Sun and Blake, yet they went for… “classmate”. You know writers care about the words used, right?

By the way, some people tried to argue that Adam just immediately notices the deep love between Yang and Blake. While I don’t disagree that he understands that Blake cares about Yang, the point is for the audience to associate the word “love” with those 2.

More bonus points

Sun was there when Yang decided to go after Blake in V3 and put Weiss in charge of going after Ruby. This shows 2 things: 1) Blake means more to her than to Sun; 2) Yang prioritizes going after Blake over her own sister. That only changed during V4 and V5 because she felt betrayed by Blake for leaving, especially when she needed her as she was struggling with losing an arm and having PTSD.

After the fall, Sun looks at an injured Blake and Yang while the first apologizes to the latter with tears in her eyes. That shot exists for Sun to realize the connection between the 2 girls, not for him to see Blake injured, otherwise it would have been better if Yang had been kept out of the frame, not to mention that he had already seen her injured. If I had to get inside his mind, I’d say that is the moment he realizes how much Yang means to Blake and it’s the reason why he brings up Yang in V4 after his injury.

If you need proof of the romantic undertones of this scene, just tell it to a friend, but swap Yang’s gender and you’ll see just how much more impactful Yang vs Adam is in relation to Sun vs Ilia. Don’t forget to mention that Adam is Blake’s ex-boyfriend while Ilia is the friend whose feelings weren’t reciprocated. Also, Adam’s line “I will destroy everything you love… starting with him”, while our gender-bent Yang enters the scene.

Dance arc

It also accomplishes a few things:

It straight up shows us that Yang understands Blake better than anyone and can get through to her like no one else;

It has Yang flirt with Blake, phrasing her invitation to the dance as “If you feel like coming out tomorrow, I’ll save a dance” and winks;

Yang comments on how she’ll be turning heads, yet the only head she turns is Blake’s.

All of the rest of team wears a dress of their colors: Ruby-red, Weiss-white, Blake-black, yet Yang uses a white one instead of yellow. I think that was to create a yin-yang effect with her and Blake. (apparently this was the result of an animation problem).

Establishes the parallel between Bumblebee and Arkos as their scenes are intertwined, which happens again in V3

(After reading the comments on rwby wiki, I have to add: those were phrased deliberately that way. I know: writers care about how they word things... shock! If you think the "coming out" or the "turning heads" were phrased accidentally with Blake turning her head also accidentally, I'm sorry but you don't know anything about writing and filmmaking. There is no way the writers didn't know "coming out" is associated with LGBTQ+ and they didn't have to phrase that way. Also, there's this thing called "editing" where writers (and others) reread the script - if those weren't intentional, they would have been detected and changed during this phase. It's about other scene, but here you go).

Bumblebee also resembles Renora as the friendship turned more and one could easily make an argument there were no hints of romance for Renora until V4, yet no one bothers to as if there are huge double standards when it comes to straight and LGBTQ+ couples: whenever two characters of the opposite gender have an interaction that can be seen as romantic or platonic, it’s seen as the first, while if the same happens to same gender, they are put in the platonic category.

Songs

Ok, so Bmblb isn’t canon, but it was still written with Bumblebee in mind. It is full of references to bees and puns, the latter was probably like the third thing the writers put on Yang’s character sheet, which probably looked like this: 1) anger issues 2) semblance: absorb and dish out energy 3) loves puns.

Bmblb is undoubtedly a love song between Yang and Blake, unlike BS song Not Fall in Love With You which was a pop song written before RWBY was even a thing. Oh, and Like Morning Follows Night isn’t romantic, except for a few Sun’s lines, but Blake’s part never treats him more than friend. Once, I read a comment saying this song was written because Jeff hates BB and finds BBers annoying. Look, if that were true (and it’s a big “if”), then, not only Jeff would be pretty petty, he’d also be incredibly stupid (again, huge “if”), because he’d OK with queerbaiting, plus it’s pretty obvious BBers would get louder as it confirmed their ship.

Armed and Ready’s first 2 verses are about Yang losing her arm and replaying the scene in her mind and within those verses she mentions “there’s nothing I won’t do for her”, which often is associated with love (“and I’d do anything for love” – not the time to express my love for that Meat Loaf’s song? My bad).

All that Matters, which includes the lines “never thought you would stay forever/never asked you to commit your life”, that definitely have a romantic connotation. The entire song reveals just how much Yang feels for Blake, even though she feels betrayed.

Red Like Roses compares Blake to the Beast and Yang to the Beauty. Tale as old as time indeed.

I could go on, but seriously just read the posts I linked to before.

So, why did Bumblebee caught so many by surprise?

Well, that one is obvious: because it’s a LGBTQ+ couple. When it comes to those, most will remain in denial and interpret everything that can be romantic or platonic as the latter while they won’t do that for heterosexual couples. Again, Renora didn’t have to be framed as romantic until V4, yet most people did think of them that way and (almost) no one complained when they became a couple.

Yet, with Bumblebee, people chose to stay in denial until the very last episode of V6 (some even after that), though it was obvious 2 episodes before. A huge part of V6 was about Bumblebee: them mending their wounds and understanding their (and each other’s) feelings. Adam attacked Yang out of jealousy, tried to make her insecure about her relationship with Blake by claiming she had promised to stay with him and didn’t keep it and, then asked “what does she even see in you?”. In spite of this, there were still people trying to deny Bumblebee as if that question appears outside a romantic context.

After all… Blake and Yang were totally straight, right? Content warning for fragile egos: yap, we’re going to talk about heteronormativity and bisexual erasure.

What do heteronormativity and bisexual erasure mean?

In this context, heteronormativity means the assumption that everyone is straight until proven otherwise. By the way, some people like to pretend this is the skeptic’s position, but it’s not. An actual skeptic (which are much rarer than internet would have you believe, because it conflates skepticism with atheism) would assume ignorance when they don’t have the complete facts. Unless a character said they are only attracted to the opposite gender or something that makes it unambiguous they are straight, they might not be. Sorry, but I’m just a bit too old to believe in a “straight of the gaps”. Sure, most people/characters are straight, but if you assume everyone is, you’ll be wrong a bunch of times.

Bisexual erasure is the failure to consider bisexuality is a thing. To be fair, most people who do this, also fail to consider pan and asexuality. To them, people are either gay or straight. And, yes, most will recognize bisexuality exists when called out, yet still fail to consider it when making an argument. They’ll point out Blake can’t be into Yang, because she had a boyfriend as if that excludes interest in girls. Spoiler alert: not only it doesn’t exclude bisexuality, it can actually not even exclude her as a lesbian (I’ll return to this later).

Both of the comments above illustrate the problems I pointed out (with the second being pretty douchey and hilariously proven wrong now). The people above act if characters aren’t straight, writers need to show it right away. After all, don’t we all meet people by saying “My name is X and my sexual orientation is y”? Or make sure people see us check out people of the opposite/same gender or both genders to reveal our sexual orientation? Just me? Not even me? OK.

I think I’ve covered the fact that attraction to the opposite gender doesn’t exclude attraction to the same. Now, let’s take a look on Yang and Blake’s interest in boys.

The only time Yang expressed interest in boys was in episode 1×03, when she was ogling some shirtless ones. “Yeah. How do you explain that? Zing”. Hold your horses mate, here’s how:

Compulsory heterosexuality (yes, I intend to explain that too, so hold your tongue/fingers before doing a GoT impression saying “shame!” over and over again);

Episode 1×03 is pretty early on, so the writers may not have yet figured out the character’s sexuality, which is supported by an interview with Monty where, when asked about future LGBTQ+ characters, he responded they might already be there, they (and writers) hadn’t figured it out yet;

It was just a joke. I have to ask if you put so much weight on Yang being straight because of that joke, why do you not exclude her as being straight (or even bi) when she makes a joke revealing disinterest in Sun’s abs? Yang is totally straight because she likes guys with abs and when she doesn’t, it has no meaning. Sorry people, but if you put so much weight in one moment where she shows interest in guys for comedic purposes, then you have to put it in equal amount in the moment she shows disinterest in guys for comedic purposes. I may not like Sun, but eternally-unbuttoned-shirt-guy-with-well-defined-abs was definitely designed to be hot. So was Neptune, by the way, yet our flirty girl couldn’t have shown to be less interested in him even though he tried to flirt with her. Our straight girl!

Compulsory heterosexuality refers to the concept that heterosexuality can be adopted by people regardless of their personal sexual preference. Basically, heterosexuality is expected and we are raised to believe that is the normal, as a result many LGBTQ+ people believe to be straight until something or someone makes them question that. So no, not everyone who is LGBTQ+ knows it right away. Many figure themselves out during their teenage years, others find out much later.

About Blake’s sexuality, all we know is she dated Adam and might have had a crush on Sun at some point. Again, this does not exclude LGBTQ+, not even the L, since, again, she might have not figured herself out. I doubt she’s a lesbian, pan/bi is more likely, but it’s still a possibility. Oh, and asexual people can have relationships too.

I’m sure some may be thinking “she has only liked guys”, but 2 isn’t a big number (and only 1 was confirmed). Like I said, in order to assert she’s straight there needs to be evidence, which there isn’t. At most, you have evidence she probably likes guys, which again doesn’t exclude her liking girls (I may be sounding awfully repetitive, but trust me, this case warrants it).

Now, some people like to pretend to feel shamed when someone claims that “If Yang was a guy, you wouldn’t see them as just friends”. I agree with the argument because… well, it’s obviously true: most people think of relationships as involving 2 people of the opposite gender, even if they are aware others exist (didn’t we just cover that some LGBTQ+ go through a self-discovery process because of that?). However, it’s ultimately counterproductive. People who do this usually aren’t aware of it (and if they are, they’ll lie about it) and it can’t be proven, usually.

Of course, some let their masks slip away too much. The person who inspired this part of the rant constantly faked outrage when called out for their behavior. They did all of it: presumed straight until proven otherwise and pretended one can be only either straight or gay. Even after being called out several times, they constantly demanded evidence that Yang and Blake weren’t straight (this was before the end of V6, obviously), though they, of course, had to provide no proof they were. Still, when someone said the endgame pairings would be SunxBlake, YangxIlia and OscarxRuby, guess what evidence they asked for? If you guessed Yang being LGBTQ+, congratulations! You win the internet!

I think I don’t have to point out the ridiculousness of asking for that when neither Oscar nor Ruby have expressed any romantic or sexual interest in anyone, regardless of gender (in 6 volumes). According to the logic of these internet-skeptics (which means: believers in gut feeling, but in denial about it), Ruby and Oscar should be asexual and aromantic until proven otherwise. Yet, even then, the assumption is they’re straight. Again, LGBTQ+ needs evidence and absence of it means evidence of absence, straight doesn’t. No double standards at all.

I think it’s time to wrap this up: writers don’t have to tell a character’s sexual orientation in the beginning. And if two characters of the same gender have interactions that can be seen as either romantic or platonic, yet you frame them always as the second, while doing the opposite for pairs of different genders – that’s on you. And if you insist on faking outrage and shame when someone points all this out (yes, it’s fake – I know it, you know it, everyone knows it), and want to keep playing the “I’m not going to be part of the system” card (’cause it’s so brave to be part of the status quo) and throwing stuff on the ground, go right ahead. Throw a hot dog, a birthday cake, your cellphone, your computer even. In the end, it changes nothing: LGBTQ+ people exist and so should LGBTQ+ characters. If you have a problem with that and demand a ridiculous standard from them that you’d never do from a straight couple, here’s a hint: sometimes, you’re just not the target audience.