#i am shocked and devistated regardless

[chushanye]

i think hermie should wrestle with the fact his dads abandoned him and then when taylor inevitably goes to visit his dad in hell and meet his grandparents he should bring hermie with, and for hermie to... go absolutely fucking insane on the king of hell

[bilesandthesourwolf]

alright everyone. i want to lay a life lesson down today. i know i’ve seen similar posts like this, but since this has now personally happened to me, i feel like it needs to be reiterated.

your mental and physical health is in your own hands. it’s gonna be up to you to make sure things get done and you get the information you need because, most of the time, stuff gets overlooked.

story time. let’s go back to 2012 when i started feeling awful. i was constantly fatigued and in pain. i was seeing a nurse practitioner at the time (i live in a small town and it sucks). she ran some blood work and found out that i have Hashimoto’s Thyroiditis, which is an autoimmune disease. if you don’t know what an autoimmune disease is, here you go: an autoimmune disease is a condition in which your immune system mistakenly attacks your body. some of these diseases include: rheumatoid arthritis, lupus, multiple sclerosis, celiac, type 1 diabetes, and fibromyalgia. now, once you have 1 autoimmune disease, you are prone to eventually get another one. so, hashimoto’s is a disease in which the white blood cells attack the thyroid, explaining all the symptoms i’d been feeling. the nurse practitioner couldn't prescribe the meds i needed, so i went to the only medical clinic we have in town and saw a doctor who prescribed me some thyroid meds. thyroid issues are tricky because it takes time to adjust the meds to what your body needs. so, it took a long time to get my meds right and i never actually felt 100% better, i just learned to live with it.

fast forward to 2014. i’m exhausted all the time. i’m in pain. my joints and muscles hurt. i can’t stand it anymore. i go see my primary care physician (pcp) Dr. A. she runs some blood work, including an autoimmune panel. i go to her for my follow up appointment and she says everything came back fine. i’m too young to have rheumatoid arthritis (i’m 28 at the time). regardless, she refers me to a rheumatologist. the rheumatologist tells me i’m fine. i now feel like i’m going crazy because none of this makes sense.

fast forward to 2015. i start seeing a new pcp, Dr Singh, at the same clinic. he’s awesome. he listens to me. he asks for my medical history. i tell him i have hashimoto’s. he helps regulate my meds, he finds i have serious vitamin and iron deficiencies. he gives me iron iv infusions. i feel a bit better, but i’m still tired and i still ache. Dr Singh runs another autoimmune panel for me. everything comes back as normal, but my sed rate (sedimentation rate) comes back high. a high sed rate means there is inflammation in your body. we chalk it up to my hashimoto’s. we move on. i learn to live with the pain in my joints and muscles and my bone wary fatigue.

at this point, i start getting copies of my blood work results, because i want to check them for myself. i highly recommend you do this and you’ll see why in a few minutes.

fast forward to december of 2017. i start getting really bad pain in my right hand (my dominant hand), mainly the knuckles. it’s worth noting that i’m a habitual knuckle cracker, this is a bad habit, i know. the pain lasts for a few weeks and then goes away. over the next year, i notice the pain in those knuckles comes and goes. i’m still exhausted and i still hurt in other areas of my body. Dr Singh still monitors my vitamin deficiencies and i get iron infusions when needed.

fast forward to 3 weeks ago. the pain in my hand comes back. it’s the worst it’s ever been. i can’t grip anything. i can’t put pressure on it. several of my knuckles are swollen. it sucks. i call the doctor’s office and of course i can’t get in to see my doctor until today, january 28th (i repeat, this is a small town and there’s only the one clinic). but my doctor is awesome and he orders me an autoimmune panel again so i can get that blood work done while my hand is still hurting. i get the blood work done. i wait.

today, i finally go in for my results. my hand is finally starting to feel better. Dr Singh looks at the lab work and says everything is normal, but my sed rate is the highest he’s seen it. i’m upset cause once again, a non answer. but, Dr Singh says “give me a minute”. i give him a minute. eventually he makes a noise of surprise. he says, “back in 2014, Dr A did an autoimmune panel on you, right?” i have to think back, it’s been a long 5 years of a lot of blood work and different specialist. “yes,” i say, “i think so”. Dr Singh says, “yes, she did and guess what? you tested positive for rheumatoid arthritis.” i’m absolutely floored. Dr A neglected to tell me i had a positive rheumatoid arthritis test 5 years ago.

see, the thing about autoimmune diseases are this: they are hard to diagnose. you can have 3 blood tests done over the course of 3 months and only 1 of those test could show positive results. it took my mother 7 years to get a diagnosis of fibromyalgia and rheumatoid arthritis. to this day, she tests positive for lupus on and off. i’ve seen 3 different rheumotologists over the years, including one of America’s leading rheumotologists. they all say i’m fine, i just have an elevated sed rate. autoimmune diseases are tricky little shits, is what i’m getting at here.

Dr Singh is astounded. i should have been officially diagnosed with rheumatoid arthritis 5 years ago. that one positive test result was it. just because i have had a few negative results over the years doesn’t matter. that was the defining test. he says this basically explains everything, my pain, my exhaustion and fatigue, my brain fog. it’s contributed to my anxiety and depression. i break down and cry. this is the answer i’ve been looking for over the last 5 years. i’m not crazy. i cry because that was 5 yeas of pain and fatigue and feeling like no one is listening and no one understands. i cry because that is 5 years of my life i am never getting back. 5 years i should have been on meds to stop the progression of joint deterioration. who knows how much damage has been done to my joints at this point. Dr Singh prescribed me a steroid to help with the inflammation but i need to see a rheumatologist (luckily a new one he recommended that i haven’t seen before) to get on meds to help stop this disease from progressing more than it already has.

i’m only 32 and i can already see some disfiguration in one of my fingers. i’m still young and i’ve got the rest of my life with this disease that ruins your joints. my mom is 60, she has rheumatoid arthrisits and she can’t move half her fingers and she needs a new knee. this is what i have to look forward to. i’m in shock. i’m devistated. i’m worried. i wish i had gotten a copy of those lab results back in 2014. i feel like suing Dr A for malpractice, because honestly, what the fuck.

my point of this very long post is that you need to be persistent. you know your body. you know when something is wrong. find a doctor who listens to you. get copies of your blood work and review it for yourself. take your health into your own hands and make shit happen.