#i am not actually how many words scripture dedicated to him | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

katemarley · 5 years ago

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fanfiction: fugue in a minor

Fandom: Hetalia Pairing: SpAus (Austria/Spain) Characters: Austria, Spain, Belgium, Augsburg, Swabia, Bavaria, Holy Roman Empire, Saxony Rating: E

Summary: 23 October 1520. Spain and Austria get married. The Imperial Estates and their guests while away the evening with music and courtly dances, celebrating both the union and Charles V’s crowning as “elected Roman emperor” in Aachen Cathedral. But what is expected of the newlyweds? And what is in for them on their wedding night?

This story has been written for Hetabang 2020. It’s a collaboration project with @aph--lietuva who was my Beta and who created wonderful art for this story that you can find on her tumblr. With her permission, I also inserted her art into this tumblr post. It’s been a pleasure working with you! ❤︎

Also available on AO3 (see the link in my profile).

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This story also is the sequel to “Prelude in A Minor” that you can also find on AO3 and that I have been talking about, but not written, for almost four years, oops... xD Both stories can be read independently from each other.

Preliminary notes: Augusta – Augsburg: brown hair, green eyes, elegant low bun Hilde/Hildegard – Swabia (Reichskreis/Imperial Circle, Reichsritterschaft/Imperial Knighthood): blond locks, green eyes, some resemblance to Switzerland and Liechtenstein Léa – Burgundy: our canon Belgium before she came to be called Belgium

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“Roderich!”

Austria turned slowly. He was wearing a cumbersome ceremonial robe that was far heavier than his usual formal attire. It had been made especially for today in order to dress him in the latest fashion and he didn’t want to rip any fabric by accident—and definitely not before the wedding.

“I’m sorry to interrupt,” said Burgundy, not sounding sorry at all as she pried him from the clutches of a dozen courtiers. He didn’t mind—courtly talk was stressful because it contained a dozen pitfalls, and Léa was a straightforward woman. Also, in a moment like this, he’d much rather be with someone comforting and familiar rather than navigate the sea of faces and names of humans he had probably only met once but was to remember regardless. Usually, he had no problem with that; he was actually very skilled at the diplomatic game. But right now, his head was too full of other thoughts.

“I need some moments alone with my consort, my partner.” Burgundy gave off an air of sovereignty as she spoke to her court who all accepted without question that this was business for the immortals to tend to. Roderich sighed in relief and let her steal him away into their bedroom.

She was fussing at his outfit, straightening it and picking imaginary lint off the velvet before making him sit down on a chair in front of the dresser. She took a brush and took off his black beret to run it softly through his hair, obviously just to have something to do while they talked.

“Liefsteling, I think we should have a little chat before you and Antonio exchange rings.”

“Didn’t we talk about all I need to know already?” Austria frowned. He was unable to keep in all his pent-up frustration and around her, he wasn’t too scrupulous to show it. “You and Charles want to strengthen the unity of the empire, so I am to marry Spain. I understand that. I don’t like it and you know I don’t like Charles, but I can see your point that marriage is a useful device to strengthen the empire.” He huffed indignantly. Sometimes, it was annoying to be “a sensible lad”, as Charles had once dubbed him, but he knew too well how these things worked to waste his time on rebelling. She let him pour it all out with a patient smile.

Finally, he quieted down and added more demurely: “I just wish it wasn’t me, and I wish I didn’t have to marry another male personification. It seems … indecent.”

“I know, dear. It’s a bit … unorthodox.” Burgundy touched his arm and squeezed it in an attempt to comfort him. A smile played on her lips that already showed her intent to lighten Roderich’s mood. “Well, listen to you complaining! You get to marry Europe’s newcomer, a surprise uncovered from Al Andalus. A shiny, new, mysterious knight, a devout catholic, and dare I say … a fair countenance. I’m sure many of the ladies here envy you. But it seemed more important to strengthen relations between two important parts of the empire that are further away from each other, rather than between him and me.” She sighed wistfully, but a bit theatrically.

“Burgundy, if you talk like that I’d swear you want to wed him!” He feigned indignance. “I wish you were the one to marry him,” he added glumly. “And the ladies can have him, for all I care.”

“Now! To think you’d give me away that easily. I’d want my husband to be jealous and fight for me!” She then stopped the theatrics and, with a soft smile, put her arm around him, just like an older sister would do. “I am a little jealous to give you away … I’m going to miss our library talks.” Roderich’s smile softened and he touched her hand.

“There is another thing I must discuss…” She seemed to hesitate. “Remember our wedding night and what we left unfulfilled?”

“Ah.” Austria tensed. “So this is what we’re talking about.”

“It is indeed.” Burgundy paused. “We didn’t complete our union that night and while we did later, it did affect us. Charles and I believe it is vital to strengthen the union of Spain and Austria as much as possible, and for that…” Her arm around Austria tensed. He could feel the topic was uncomfortable for her.

“And for that, the marriage needs to be consummated,” Austria said flatly. “That doesn’t exactly come as a surprise, Léa.”

“Yes, but it’s not the only thing we discussed…”

Roderich now felt his cheeks redden “What? The insolence!” He sighed. “That imprudent man was actually discussing the technicalities of a coupling between two men with you? ”

“He only wants to ensure that the strength of the union…”

“Don’t defend him!” Austria snapped. Léa flinched.

“I’m sorry,” he said in a quieter tone. “It’s just that he has no idea how things actually work at my place. I don’t like how little interest he takes, and now he focuses on the anatomy of the personification rather than on the resources of the land…” He sighed. The duality of beings like them further complicated everything.

Spain and him were “mere manifestations of the political body shaping them”, Charles had told him not long ago. Manifestations of the body politic—not men. That meant the laws of the Church regarding marriages between humans didn’t apply to them. Archbishop Hermann of Cologne had agreed and had added that the biblical example for a country was to be the heavenly Jerusalem, which further expands itself to gain as much territory as possible and to help the spread of Christianity all over the world. To strengthen their holy empire like this was to behave exactly as the Bible dedicated.

“The fact that we’re human personifications really is convenient to the likes of him: Whether they consider us human or not ultimately depends on what’s more convenient to them. Two men couldn’t marry, but the human-shaped, but not human, personifications of Spain and Austria can. It doesn’t matter to him that our anatomy is exactly the same as that of two male human beings.”

“I know. I agree with you, I’ve seen kings and bishops use scripture as a justification rather than as a guide many times. As a woman, I have often felt what it was like to be an exception to the rule”, said Burgundy firmly, reminding him of her own position. “However, there’s another message those cowards have made me the messenger of” She stopped brushing his hair, seemingly looking for the right words.

“Yes?” Austria waited. He had no intention to help her with this.

“The king and bishop believe that because this is already infringing on normal matrimony, everything else should mimic a normal marriage as closely as possible.” She interrupted herself, She looked at Austria as if she was hoping that he would understand it. He did but he was going to have her say it.

“Well, you know. Have the position of the wife be taken by the—by the—more gallant one of the two.” Even her silver tongue couldn’t phrase this more delicately.

Austria was speechless. Charles—this morally rigid, exceedingly religious person—not only insisted two men marry for political reasons, as an unpleasant but ultimately bearable formality. No, he had also insisted these two men actually consummate their marriage and had elaborate thoughts on the mechanics of it. Austria was seriously tempted to rush off, grab Charles by the ruff and give him a piece of his mind. Including the rhetorical question what he thought their private parts looked like.

Burgundy saw the face he was making and spat out the rest. “And only the accepted position, all else is fornication. So you’re to lay on your back.” She let out a small whimper and looked faint. Austria realized that he shouldn’t direct his anger at her. She had always been his friend.

“Cowards, the both of them. In treating you as a country, they are indeed forgetting you’re a lady. Your nature is far too delicate for such crass messages.” He stood up and took her hands gently. He didn’t want to fight with her.

She embraced him, held him for a moment and then stepped back.

“I have something for you.” She opened a chest with a key from her belt and produced a box. “Open it, I’d like for you to wear it today.” Roderich did so and found an ornate golden chain with the Golden Fleece in it.

“Your order…” Roderich smiled at her.

“When you united with me, you obtained the right to be a part of the Order of the Golden Fleece. When you’re out there, I’m with you.” Roderich felt a tightness around his chest as he recognised the curls on top of the ram shaping the letter B for Burgundy.

He wasn’t in this alone.

She placed the chain around his neck with an air of ceremony and made sure it lay evenly over his shoulders. She smiled at him and kissed his forehead, after which she traced the sign of the cross on it with her finger. After the tender gesture, she rather forcefully put the beret back on his head and chuckled. “There, you’re ready!”

Oh, he wasn’t ready. Far from it, but it was happening now.

---

The procession departed from the house he shared with Burgundy in Aachen. Usually, the bride was led to the house of her new husband, but Spain did not have a house there. Out of convenience, they were using the cathedral, which had already been prepared for the coronation of Charles V, and the city hall for the festivities after that. In the procession, all the nuptial gifts Austria had received were carried along and displayed. Some of them were made of strange, exotic-looking gold brought from the new world that gleamed ostentatiously in the afternoon sun. Roderich could feel the presence of Spain through everything surrounding him. Even the new coat had been paid for by him.

The marriage itself was overwhelming in terms of pompously clad courtiers and country personifications, but rather underwhelming in terms of anything else. Roderich’s feelings were a mixture of nervousness because so many people watched him and carefully veiled anger at being one of the two pawns in Charles’s and Burgundy’s political plans.

The truly annoying thing was that he saw the logic behind their actions. He just didn’t like how they affected him.

They were met by the second procession coming from the opposite direction with Spain at its centre. Roderich sought out his eyes, but he was still mostly obscured by the crowd. Both processions reached the cathedral and filled the front part of the space. The nave and choir were reserved for mass, after all, and weddings were worldly affairs. So, leaving the late Gothic choir unoccupied, everyone gathered in the octagonal Palatine Chapel at the very front of the church, leaving the centre open for the couple and the priest.

Roderich’s eyes had to adjust to the relative darkness of the church in contrast with the bright afternoon outside. Two young boys were made to hold long torches over Spain’s and his head and above them, a plethora of little candles were lit in the giant octagonal candelabra. For a moment, he was captivated by the little lights and a realisation dawned upon him: The small structures on the chandelier represented gates. It was a direct depiction of Heavenly Jerusalem. The architecture mimicked the octagonal shape of the chandelier and thus that of Jerusalem as well. The words of the archbishop about the biblical duties of a country echoed through his head. He realized that his duty was literally hanging over his head.

As his gaze war already turned upwards, he saw that the upper gallery was filling with people as well, all of them waiting while a small shadow was passing in front of them. The figure walking around the upper gallery barely reached over the coiled cast-iron balustrades when he finally halted and stepped into the light. The Holy Roman Empire wore the Imperial Regalia and made a gesture of blessing. He was their witness, as it was his empire they were fortifying. The ancient child climbed onto the bare marble throne that had once belonged to their forefather in order to oversee the wedding. Roderich would have laughed at the image of Karl der Kleine playing at being Karl der Große, had he not felt a chill run down his spine at the image of Karl on his throne. Among everyone here, he was the one that belonged there. His spirit had been there when these walls had been built and through his presence, through his breath, the spirit of history slowly filled the space.

When the priest asked them to say their vows, Austria obliged, speaking flatly and without emotion. Spain’s intonation was much livelier, but from what little he had learned about the other country in the past months, that was the way they were: One who usually remained calm unless you crossed him one too many times; and another who seemed to be ever vigorous.

The priest produced a small dish on which Spain put a piece of gold, a piece of silver and a ring.

Roderich extended his hand meekly for Antonio to put on the ring, but then noticed something. The ring was of a German type. He wondered if this was Spain being thoughtful or him purchasing one at the last minute. Spain held up the ring and clicked it open to be two separate rings. To Roderich’s surprise, they were gimmel rings …

Spain explained in a hushed voice: “Because we are both men, I felt I couldn’t just put a ring on you. We should both wear one. I liked these because of what they say.” He was referring to the words around the band, which he read out in horribly accented German: was Gott zusammen fueget soll der Mensch nicht schneiden. They were a purplish ruby and an emerald. Antonio carefully put the half with the emerald on Roderich’s left ring finger and then handed him the ruby to do the same. This was thoughtful of Antonio—had he come up with this himself or was this the council of Karl advising him? Austria was very aware of the new weight around his finger and his resolve to remain cold started to waver.

When the priest asked them to kiss, Austria’s first impulse was to do it as unemotionally as he had made his vows. Then his eyes caught the pleading look in Spain’s, and his resolve faltered.

Spain was a pawn as well. He didn’t deserve Austria’s coldness. If anyone, it was Charles who deserved coldness.

They settled for a chaste but tender kiss. There was relief in Spain’s eyes when they separated, and Austria was glad his softer side had got the best of him.

They didn’t deserve to be pawns.

They were in this together.

They were then taken to the altar to kneel and be blessed. Austria stole a glance to Spain halfway who had his eyes shut tightly and was fervently praying. Thoughts were drowning out Roderich’s own prayers as well as the words of the priest. Worries about everything—about whether God could really approve of their union, about how his life was going to change after this, even about the impending consummation. They all seemed to lump together in an all-encompassing buzzing noise in his head.

He barely registered the “Amen”.

Then they were hoisted back on their feet and, with much loud music and cheering, led out of the church for another procession to the city hall that had been readied for further festivities. For a moment, Roderich stood there like a deer facing a hunter. Then, almost as if it was the most natural thing ever, Spain took his hand and pulled him into the cacophony of the crowd, but the act did make Austria’s thoughts quieten down.

Remember, Austria thought to himself.

They were in this together.

---

“Austria.”

Austria turned to the speaker. He had recognised her voice instantly.

Augsburg bowed, albeit not very low. She was an imperial city, much smaller than him in terms of her land and yet so much wealthier.

“Augsburg.” Austria bowed on his part, anxious not to incline his head lower than she had. He could at least keep up appearances, if nothing else.

It was her who took his hand for the basse danse—almost imperceptible, but the transgression was there. She swept her eyes over the people that had gathered inside Aachen’s town hall: Most of them were members of the high nobility and imperial estates who wouldn’t have missed the opportunity to show themselves for Charles’s crowning and the establishment of the Austro-Spanish union alike. There were guests from other kingdoms, too, moving in the slow and elegant sequence of steps so characteristic for this dance. Not all of those people had come to Austria and Spain’s wedding ceremony itself.

It makes them uncomfortable, Austria thought. But who was he to complain? It made him uncomfortable, too.

“Lovely, isn’t it?” Augsburg said with the attitude of a self-satisfied host. “Don’t you think the banquet was quite decent, too?”

Hand movements, steps, hand movements—they all came naturally to Austria. He didn’t need to think with his brain when he danced. His feet had memorised the steps, going through the motions without his conscious thought.

“One could almost think it was your marriage,” Austria replied in the politest tone he could muster.

Stop it, Aunt Augusta, this isn’t your marriage.

Augsburg understood him very well. She pulled them aside before they were to change partners, giving him her piece of mind. Someone like Augusta didn’t even need to raise her eyebrow. One look was enough.

“Oh, I much prefer to be the merchant who pays for all of this,” she said bluntly. “I pay; you do my bidding. That’s how things work these days, dearie. It’s the same for your Charles and my Jakob Fugger.”

He’s not my Charles. Austria bit down on his lips. It would have been unwise to wear his heart on his sleeve in front of her. You never knew what she might do with a delicate piece of information such as this. How she might profit from it. For this seemed to be what the world of merchants was all about: Profit; personal gain.

“You’ve become cold,” he said eventually. The irony wasn’t lost on him: Augsburg seemed cold because she focused on monetary gain; Charles seemed cold because he focused on political gain; and Austria acted cold because he did what needed to be done.

Still, marrying someone he barely knew felt daunting. So did the uncertainty of how other people thought about his marriage: Did they perceive it the way Charles had presented it to everyone—as a political union only? Were they secretly disgusted because both personifications who had exchanged vows inhabited male human bodies? Did they expect them to consummate their marriage?

“I’m not cold, dearie,” Augsburg interrupted his train of thoughts. Her voice was warmer and darker now; a tone he remembered from his childhood. “I’m only trying to achieve the best for my people, as we all do—or should be doing, at the very least.”

That was undoubtedly true. It was the truth at the very core of all country personifications: You are the land—or, in Augsburg’s case, the city. Do what is best for the land and those who call it their home.

You could go against that, but not for very long. It drove you insane. There had been examples of that, too…

Swabia had told him to be the land, time and time again. When she had vanished, everybody had thought her dead. Then she had returned, telling everyone she would always be there as long as there was one soul who remembered her name and called themselves Swabian. Histrionics, they had thought, and yet…

Perhaps there was some grain of truth in it. Perhaps the key was to believe in it yourself.

“You look far too serious, darling,” Augsburg said into his thoughts. “Cheer up, it’s your wedding day!” She patted his cheek in an almost motherly gesture. “It’s all new to you now, but you’ll get used to being his husband.”

“Will I?” he said flatly. His anger was still there, bubbling under the surface. “Will I ever?”

She ignored his despondent answer and studied Spain from across the room before leaning in with a conspiratory grin. “So, what do you think: Is he or isn’t he?”

Austria was confused. “Is he what?”

She answered as if she was discussing the latest court scandal. “Moorish, of course! He spent so much time under Muslim occupation. Perhaps he obtained some Moorish blood or strange habits! Hmm, his skin is pale, but his curls are dark! If he’d grow a beard, he’d look the part.”

She had achieved her aim. Roderich had been fighting the Ottoman Turks at his eastern border for a while now, and he was thoroughly scandalized.

“I sure hope you’re joking!”

“Oh, well, it doesn’t matter, as long as he has no more Muslim tendencies. Take a piece of advice from someone who’s been around for one and a half millennia,” she told him, glancing meaningfully at Spain’s back once she had spotted him among the dancers. “You could have had it worse. At least he’s handsome.”

“He plays the vihuela.” Austria hadn’t even intended to give her this piece of information; it had simply slipped out.

“Does he?” Now Augsburg did raise an eyebrow. “That’s even better. I may know less than you about arranged marriages between rulers unless we’re only talking about ceremonies, but I believe it’s always useful to have some common ground.” She glanced at Spain again. “And like I said, he’s nicely shaped.” Her hands made curving motions, forming two semicircles.

“What?” Austria looked at her in puzzlement.

It took a few seconds until the penny dropped.

“Augusta!” Austria hissed, blushing furiously. “How very indecent!”

“You’re the one who’s going to see it without all those layers of clothing,” Augsburg deadpanned. “Most likely, in any case.” She shrugged. “Unless Charles told you not to make inquiries in that direction. But if I were you, I’d still try to squeeze it, no matter what Charles says. I feel tempted to do it even now.”

“Please don’t!” Austria felt very hot all of a sudden. Until now, he had pushed thoughts about the technical side of consummating a marriage out of his mind. Trust Augusta not to let me get away with it. Augsburg’s words planted mental images in his head that he really didn’t want to think about just now.

“Hmm...” Augsburg threw a calculating glance in Spain’s general direction. “No, I won’t squeeze it. But tempted I am.”

They joined the basse danse again. At some point, Spain gave a little yelp, looking around himself in puzzlement. Austria was entirely unsurprised to spot Augusta quite close to him, looking just as surprised about the sound as anyone else.

Austria sighed.

She was a good actor, he had to give her that.

---

“Roderich!”

Third time’s the charm, Roderich thought, turning toward the person who had uttered his name in a mixture between a hiss and a rough whisper.

Swabia took him by the arm—not a very comfortable experience from an old warrior with an iron grip. Austria winced.

“Sorry,” Swabia said casually, not sounding sorry at all. Austria inwardly rolled his eyes. Why was half his family like this?

She dragged him in a corner suitably far away from spying eyes and ears. Only then she released her grip. Austria rubbed his protesting upper arm.

“Listen to me, boy,” she said urgently. Her voice was dark, almost masculine. When Austria had been little, he had thought she was a man, and she had done nothing to discourage that notion. Then the Duchy of Swabia had been no more, and for all people knew, she had vanished from the face of the Earth. It was only when she had reappeared a few decades ago, from Heaven knew where, that she had been open about being a woman.

“What is it, Hilde?” He couldn’t help it; he sounded unnerved.

“I do realise that everyone wants you to do or be something for them today,” Swabia said gruffly, “but that is precisely the reason why we need to talk. What do you know about bedding ceremonies?”

“Oh no,” Austria groaned. “They wouldn’t, would they.” His tone was too flat to count as a question. They would, he knew that. Or at least certain people would.

“I discouraged them from actually witnessing the consummation,” Swabia said in the tone of the long-suffering. “But Burgundy will guide Spain and I will guide you to your chamber.”

Austria smacked his head against the nearest wall. He did it with caution, so as not to accidentally hurt himself, but the message was clear. As soon as he leaned back, Swabia patted his back not very gently. He suspected it would take several minutes until it recovered from this onslaught.

“We’re going to leave as soon as we’ve finished escorting you,” she reassured him. “I, for my part, have no intention whatsoever to watch the actual consummation, whether it actually takes place or not.” Her voice sounded affronted at the mere suggestion, one clear indication, Austria thought, that someone had indeed suggested she stay and watch.

“But others might have fewer qualms,” Austria said. Swabia had always appreciated straightforwardness, a no-bullshit attitude and, last but not least, people who thought for themselves. That was one thing that hadn’t changed between before and after.

“Precisely,” she said darkly. “Don’t look at him, but you know who I mean.”

Bavaria, thought Austria. Out loud, he said: “He has always been a bully.”

“He has been a bully towards you from the very moment Redbeard and I decided to make you a duchy independent from him,” Swabia specified. “Which, even though it is all water under the bridge now, it is a major reason why I feel responsible to protect you from him in a moment when you will be vulnerable.”

Austria’s heart softened. Thinking back, she had always had an impressive ability to put herself in other people’s shoes—oh well, nothing special there; think like the enemy was one of the first things Bavaria himself had taught him. But Swabia had always had a motherly streak towards him, Austria—and that made all the difference, even though he hadn’t realised it when he was little.

“In any case,” Swabia swiftly returned to the matters at hand, “Bavaria will probably try to sneak up on you. If you don’t want that—and I’m sure you don’t—I urgently advise you not to start anything until he has made the attempt. I don’t know, sing some merry songs instead. Play a nice board game with your husband, for all I care. But see to it that there will be nothing for Bavaria to see. Alright?”

“Alright,” said Austria, “but how can I be sure that he won’t come back for another attempt?”

“I will see to that,” Swabia said gloomily. Austria had to pull himself together so as not to take an involuntary step back. She could be menacing when she set her mind to it.

An old warrior, they said. Better with the sword than with the head. But that wasn’t true; Austria knew it wasn’t. In order to be as good with the sword as her, you had to be a quick thinker, too. The difference was that she was no schemer at all—nothing like Augusta. But she was no schemer because she had an aversion to scheming, not because she was fundamentally unable to think in such a way.

“Thank you.” He gave her a genuine smile. She smiled back, in her own firm and earnest way, insofar as you could smile earnestly.

“You will remain in the corridor?” he asked.

“Don’t worry, I will keep my distance.”

“I did not worry. In fact, I’m glad it will be you who stays there.”

---

As the festivities progressed, Swabia came over once again—this time for everyone to be seen—took Austria gently by the hand—the hand, not the arm—and guided him away. He did not see Burgundy approach Spain, but they arrived in front of Spain and his chamber at the same time.

“Have fun, boys!” Burgundy said with a cat-like smile before she left them alone.

Swabia exchanged a meaningful glance with Austria. Then she nodded at them both and went away. Her footsteps echoed in the corridor—still a soldier’s steps despite the elegant dress she was wearing.

“Who is she?” whispered Spain in Italian as soon as the footsteps had died away.

“Swabia.” My guardian angel, he thought. And she is still here.

“The one who—” Spain craned his neck as if he could catch another glimpse of her that way.

“Who what?” Austria pretended not to know what Spain was asking about.

“Who spent her time in that mountain—you know, the same that Emperor Frederick II went to?”

“The Kyffhäuser, you mean,” Austria said.

“And said she had returned because it was a time of need for her children?” Spain continued, still craning his neck to see what was not to be seen anymore.

Oh dear, my husband is naïve. Roderich sighed.

“For all I know, Frederick II died in Castel Fiorentino in 1250,” he said drily. “For all I know, she has never been gone. Probably kept her head down because her children wanted so many different things. But as soon as aforesaid children think it best to unite, she’s there again, as head of their league. Head of the Swabian Circle now, too.”

“I hear grudging respect,” said Spain.

“At some point when I was little, I used to look up to her,” Austria explained. “She was the leading power of the empire back then. I wanted to be like her. Wanted to earn the empire’s crown.”

“So you did.”

“So I did,” Austria repeated sourly. “And look what good it is doing me. I’m nothing but a pawn in a game too big for me to play. She has never been a pawn.”

“Oh no,” Spain said earnestly. “She has always been a knight.” He paused. “So are you. And so am I.”

There was a small silence before Spain opened the door.

“Shall we go in?”

The room was pleasant and warm. Roderich noticed he’d been gifted a marriage chest. He had no time to look at it, though. Instead, he was looking for the right words to say.

For the first time after their wedding ceremony, Austria looked directly into his husband’s eyes. Play a nice board game with your husband, for all I care.

Then, to his dismay, Spain stepped closer to him and leaned in, inclining his head for a kiss.

“No! Wait.” Roderich’s voice came out more shrill than he had intended. He stepped back and tried to compose himself.

“May I challenge you to a game of chess?”

Shock and hurt manifested in Spain’s eyes. Austria could read him like an open book.

Oh. So this is important to you, Austria thought. Who would have thought.

“But…” Spain whimpered.

“I do not intend to eschew my marital duties,” Austria reassured him in his most formal tone. “I do, however, intend to postpone them for some more minutes or, as it may be, hours.”

Spain looked at him in confusion.

“You will see why.”

Spain thought about that.

“Chess it is, then,” he decided in the end.

They had barely lit all the candles in the room, taken off their shoes and laid out the chessboard in the middle of their four-poster when a long-haired blonde barged into their chamber.

“Austria!” he barked.

“You know, Saxony, there is such a thing as a door,” Austria said gently, placing his first pawn to e4 on the board. “The concept might seem novel to you, but it is for knocking.”

“Don’t give me that bullshit!” The blond man’s blue eyes bored into Austria’s purple ones. “I’m here to warn you! Your brother wants to be an asshole once again and spy on you…”

“Spy on me playing chess with my husband?” Austria asked sweetly.

Saxony visibly deflated.

“I should have expected you to know.”

“No harm done. But, Saxony—” Austria paused.

“Yes?”

“Next time you intend to warn someone of potential bedding ceremonies, do knock before you barge in. You might, you know … cause the exact thing you aim to prevent.”

“Sorry, Austria.” Saxony hung his head.

“Chin up,” Austria said jovially. “Like I said, no harm done.”

There was silence after Saxony had trudged out of the room.

“So this is why you suggested a game of chess,” Spain said eventually, moving one of his own pawns to e5.

“Exactly.” In a split-second decision, Austria moved a second pawn to f4. Spain whistled.

“Classic! Did you read Francesch Vicent’s book on chess?”

Austria gave him his best enigmatic smile.

---

They hadn’t played for long when the door clicked open one more time, and Augsburg put her head inside.

“Chess?” she asked in disapproval. “How boring!”

“It is a very interesting game!” insisted Spain.

Augsburg pouted.

“Your butt is far more interesting to me, young man. One should have thought seeing it was included in the price I paid for this wedding, but this seems not to be so. Good evening, gentlemen.”

With that, her head vanished, and the door clicked shut. Spain stared after her, open-mouthed.

“What was that?”

“The question is: Who was that, dear Antonio,” said Austria patiently. “The answer is: Meet Aunt Augusta, the moneybag who pays for everything you have seen so far, except for the fixed interior of this building. Then again, you have already met her or, rather, met her thumb and forefinger when she pinched your behind earlier this evening.”

“That was her?” Spain stared at the door.

“I’m afraid so.”

With that, Austria returned his focus to the game.

---

“Do you really think this is appropriate—”

Everyone was surprised when they first heard the child’s voice that sounded so very old. Austria’s first thought now was bafflement.

“Let me down!” the voice clamoured. “Let me down this instant! I don’t want—”

Then their camber door was kicked open with a bang, revealing Bavaria with a struggling Holy Roman Empire in one of his arms.

Something within Austria’s mind clicked. He stalked towards Bavaria in his stockings, putting his hands on his hips.

“What do you even think you’re doing?” he hissed. White-hot anger coursed through his veins.

“Roderich!” Bavaria said in what he had clearly attempted to be a jovial tone. It slipped. “We just…”

“We?” hissed Austria. “We?” His voice rose. “You dragged little Karl here against his will and you have the nerve to suggest he was in any way involved in the idea of seeing his guardian in a compromising situation?” Austria was still growing and only wore socks, but somehow, he managed to tower over Bavaria regardless.

“Erm…” Bavaria did one sensible thing and put Holy Rome to the ground. Austria grabbed him by the collar, still seething with anger.

“Roderich?” the young, old voice said calmly. “Theodor?”

Both countries looked at him.

“I think we should all calm down now, and then Theodor and I will return to the festivities. Is that not a good idea, Theodor?”

“Yes,” Bavaria said glumly. Then Holy Rome took his hand and guided him away. Austria closed the door after them—with deliberate care. Antagonising Karl was never a good idea. It made you seem childish.

“Alright.” Austria let out a long sigh. “After this, I think they will leave us alone at last.”

Then he saw the look in Spain’s eyes. There was a flicker of reverence in them as well as a distinct spark of—interest? Austria’s stomach did a tiny flip.

“So…” Spain was brushing his hand alongside the nape of his neck; a clear, if somewhat clumsy, sign of nervousness.

“So.” Austria was nervous, too. He tried not to show it; tied to muster the stoic bravery he always associated with Swabia.

“I rather think there will be no more disturbances now, and … I think we both know what is expected of us.” Damn. He was sure Swabia’s voice would not have been quavering.

“Have you ever done this before? I mean, with…” He didn’t know how to continue the sentence. With another man? But were they men? They weren’t human beings; that he was sure of. But their bodies were built like those of two male human beings, and the fact that the church itself had made it official today that human law did not apply to them… To him, it seemed like cheating. It appeared that kings and popes would always decide what they were on the basis of what was most convenient to them.

He looked on the chessboard. Were they pawns in this game of kings?

Spain followed his gaze. He picked up the chessboard from the bed and placed it carefully on the floor.

“You’re thinking too much.” Even Spain’s voice was gentle.

“I always do.” Austria looked away, on the cushions of the large four-poster. So, he thought once more. This was when…

“Will you let me guide you?” Spain said in the same quiet voice he had used before. “Because I actually have done this before.”

“You?” Austria’s head whipped up. He stared at Spain incredulously. “I thought…” He didn’t know how to continue. “Religion…”

For a split second, Spain appeared to be flustered but then answered with an aloofness that seemed almost like he was overcompensating:

“I know what the authorities say on the matter, and in the beginning, I was confused, too. But … it’s not really all that different, you know.” He shrugged. “I’m not a theologian, so I might miss a few points, but if the bishop approves of it, I can’t find fault with it either. Especially when it’s about our kind, who don’t have children the human way anyway.”

“Hm.” Austria thought. “That seems to be the main point, doesn’t it?”

Spain didn’t reply. Austria didn’t know if Spain really thought what he suspected—what he would have thought in Spain’s stead, in any case: Think like that if it makes you feel better about it.

He would try to, anyway.

“What do I need to do?”

“Stop looking like you’re going to face down an enemy, for starters.” Spain smiled as he was inching closer to him.

“I’m trying to.” Austria relaxed his features. Perhaps thinking How would Swabia handle this? wasn’t a good approach in every situation.

“First of all, I’m going to kiss you,” Spain declared. There was an edge to his voice Austria couldn’t quite place. “Then … just follow my lead. And push me away if you want me to stop, okay?”

Austria nodded.

Then a gentle, calloused hand cupped his chin and warm, slightly chapped lips captured his lower lip.

This really was no different to being with a woman, Austria thought involuntarily. At least so far.

He opened his mouth to let Spain in when his tongue demanded it. Spain was a good kisser, at the least; Austria had to give him that. He made an involuntary, small sound at the back of his throat and could feel Spain smile against his lips before he started to kiss Austria’s cheek.

“That is a fine coat you’re wearing but it’s in my way.” Spain deftly pushed the fur-lined coat down Austria’s shoulders and let it fall to the floor with a heavy thud. He kissed down Austria’s neck where the wide necked undershirt left him ample room for kisses. While kissing he got at the laces and points that held Austria’s doublet closed down his side and carefully started undoing them.

Austria’s hands were much more clumsy as he tried to open Spain’s belt that held his sayo gathered at the waist. It was an action dangerously close to the codpiece that peeked from between Spain’s skirts. The kissing had made him light-headed; he refused to accept thinking of himself as aroused yet.

Spain was progressing rapidly and now moved to the laces that tied his doublet to his hoses, it wouldn’t be long or he’d be in his shirt. Austria believed it his duty to do the same, but it was hard to think with Spain’s lips and hair touching his skin, and he had to get Spain to remove his coat and say first before he could get at any laces himself…

Spain sat back and laughed.

“We should have changed into our nightshirts before we started this, shouldn’t we?”

“Probably,” Austria said breathlessly. His mouth twitched upwards, too. “I always underestimate the time it takes to change out of ceremonial clothing.”

Spain flashed back a grin.

“Especially when you’re dead tired after some tedious reception, isn’t it?” He chucked off his own heavy coat and then pulled off the sayo over his head, leaving him in just his jubón and very short breeches and stockings, a state of undress that was already quite scandalous. Austria watched him before he realised that now would be a good time to start unfastening what Spain hadn’t unfastened yet. He took off his doublet and was left in just his undershirt and his breeches.

There was just one problem: The moment he untied the codpiece that was closing his breeches, Spain would see that… Well, that the kissing hadn’t quite left Austria unaffected. And wasn’t that too early…

Meanwhile, Spain had loosened his jubón from the shorts and undid just as many laces as needed to hastily pull it off. He accidentally pulled his linen undershirt along and got a bit stuck. With a little determination he had freed himself and stretched, his upper body was now completely bare. Austria stared. Where he was soft and a little skinny, Spain’s body was covered in hard planes of muscle. He suddenly felt self-conscious about his own body.

Then, Spain pulled loose his garter bands and loosened his codpiece and pushed down everything he wore on the lower half of his body. It was tight so he had to work it down a bit before being able to pull it off. The man was stark naked now. Without conscious thought, Austria’s eyes were drawn to his half-hard cock.

“But you didn’t even…” Austria had no idea how he wanted to finish this sentence.

“It’s basically been like this since we entered the bedroom,” Spain admitted frankly. “But it got a little harder when you put your brother in his place.”

“But … why?” That probably ranked pretty high on a list of most stupid questions ever uttered, Austria realised, so he clarified: “I mean … it’s not as if we had much of a choice…”

“Simple,” Spain said. “You look good. You’re graceful when you dance, among other things. I knew kissing you would feel good, too, and it does.”

“You’re the one who looks good.” Austria knew he was simply stating a fact. “I, on the other hand…” He pulled his wide linen shirt, over his head, leaving himself shirtless. He was trying not to think too much about how he looked.

Then he caught Spain’s stare.

He blinked.

“You know the saying,” murmured Spain, walking over to Austria’s side of the bed. “Beauty lies in the eyes of the beholder.” He raked his eyes over Austria’s, as Austria thought himself, rather scrawny chest. Spain’s broad, warm hands followed, and that did feel good…

Then Spain had managed to untie Austria’s knee breeches. He pulled them down.

“Oh.” Spain stared at Austria’s cock—a rather unbecoming thing, Austria thought; pale with some angry red at the tip.

“And here I was actually worried your body might not react, no matter what I do.”

Was that before or after you kissed me breathless? Austria wanted to quip, but then Spain was on his knees and—alright, that was something he had experienced before too, but Spain had swallowed him whole, and…

He cried out and swore in German, in words he would otherwise have denied he even knew. So much for keeping this to ‘the approved position’ Burgundy had demanded of him this was definitely fornication. He liked that idea, yes there were so many things he had to comply with about this marriage. But there were parts of it that no one could control except for the two of them, no matter how much others might want to.

Spain pushed him on the bed, getting rid of Austria’s breeches and socks while he was at it, never stopping with his mouth…

Rational thought escaped Austria, and that was probably just as fine because he wasn’t keen on evaluating the sounds he made anyway.

Then one of Spain’s hands held down his hips. Cold air hit his cock as Spain sat on his knees, raking his eyes over Austria while he was stroking himself.

Austria stared. He hadn’t felt so aroused in a long time.

“Want to touch me?” Spain asked. Austria nodded. He ran his hands over the muscles on Spain’s chest before he let one hand dip down into Spain’s soft flank. His other hand wrapped around Spain’s cock.

It was a new sensation to hold a cock that wasn’t his own, but Austria knew how he liked to be touched … if he twisted his hand just like this … Spain’s hips bucked under his hands.

“Okay, okay, you’re making me come!” Spain pushed his hand off. “Not yet.”

Oh yes… So far, it had been easy. But that had just been Spain’s way of making the whole thing more bearable, hadn’t it?

Austria rolled on his stomach. Better get it over with…

Broad hands started to knead his … backside, for want of a more becoming term. He felt a puff of air between his cheeks, and then…

He didn’t know if he had bucked or flinched. In any case, he hadn’t been prepared for Spain’s tongue … there.

At first, the sensations were just confusing. Then Spain’s tongue started to work him for real, darting in and out and caressing his inner walls. He started to pant again.

“Hmm…” Spain hummed against his arse. Austria’s hips bucked out of their own volition. “And I didn’t even need to tell you to relax.” The puffs of air against his hole made him buck his hips again.

“That’s good,” Spain continued. “I’m going to work you open now,” he explained. “That might get a bit uncomfortable. You need to tell me if it gets too much, alright?”

“Yes,” said Austria. It was hard to think through his arousal, but he had understood. On the other hand, he had no intention whatsoever to tell Spain that anything was too much. Grit your teeth…

Spain leaned away from him, taking something from his clothes. Austria looked after him.

“Olive oil,” Spain explained as he opened the jar. “The very best.”

Then Spain started, using his tongue and an oil-coated finger to stretch Austria from the inside… It didn’t feel good, but it was also not the horrible feeling Austria had expected: A mixture of pleasure—yes, it was still there—and the uncomfortable sensation of being stretched in a place that hadn’t been made for stretching all that much. Austria’s hips still bucked when Spain inserted two oily fingers and his tongue, moving them in and out, but his moans were now half pain, half pleasure.

“I think you’re ready,” Spain said eventually.

Am I? thought Austria. He wasn’t ready at all; not mentally, at the least.

Something warm and spongy that had also been coated in oil nudged his arse, and then he had to bite his lips hard not to cry out in pain because that was definitely bigger than…

“Oh, shit,” Spain swore. A number of Spanish expletives followed as he rolled them both to the side, arms flailing. At least it distracted Austria from the unpleasant feeling.

“What…?” he started to ask.

“Damn. Sorry. I almost lost control… Did I hurt you?”

“Not much,” Austria said, more or less truthfully. “Is there something I can do to help?”

“I’d better … hold my legs still. Can you, uh, move against me?”

Austria understood immediately. He tugged one of Spain’s arms across his chest.

“Alright. Hold me.”

Spain did, muscles quivering from the effort not to move while Austria pushed his ass against him again and again, panting in the effort of moving.

“This doesn’t work,” he concluded. “On your back.”

Spain did as he was told. Austria took the jar from Spain’s hand, rubbing more oil on his dick and between his ass cheeks. Then he sat on him, face to his legs because Spain really didn’t need to see the grimace he pulled. He gave himself no time to think about the fact that suddenly it seemed to be him, not Spain, who controlled the situation. Instead, he used his weight to push Spain’s dick inside of him in slow thrusts that strained his leg muscles

When he was almost inside, Spain’s hips jerked upward, knocking the wind out of Austria’s lungs.

“You can turn me around now,” Austria panted as soon as he was sure his voice wouldn’t come out an octave too high. Spain did so, trying to hold his dick inside of Austria as it was. It wasn’t really possible because Austria could feel every little movement, and it wasn’t a pleasant sensation at all.

In the end, they were on their sides again, Spain’s arm once again slung across Austria’s chest.

“You’re so tight,” Spain panted. “Too tight. Can you try to relax?”

Austria did his best. He thought about Spain’s hands on him; the moment he had touched Spain; Spain’s lips around him… That had felt good.

“Better,” Spain grunted. He rocked his hips, keeping Austria in place with his arm.

It actually was better. The stretch was still unpleasant, but the oil did its job quite nicely now, and the pace Spain set suited Austria well: Not too fast, but not too slow either; not too hard and not too soft. He felt his cock that had become softer in the past minutes harden once again.

Then Spain’s hand brushed down Austria’s chest, gripped his cock, and—oh, that was more like it.

Spain’s mouth started to pepper kisses on his neck. Austria understood what he wanted, turning his head until Spain could kiss him. The kiss was open-mouthed and clumsy. Spain moaned into it as his hips moved harder and faster. At last, Austria’s hips started to jerk out of their own volition, torn between the thrusts from behind, the hand around his cock and the tongue in his mouth.

Suddenly, Spain brushed something inside of him that sent a shock of arousal through him. He cried out. Spain’s hand that had only held his cock before twisted up and down. Before Austria had registered what was happening, sticky wetness hit his stomach. Then Spain brushed the same spot as before, and another spurt of come followed the first.

Spain pumped Austria’s cock in a frenzy while his hips jerked up fast and erratically. Spots started to dance before Austria’s eyes. Then Spain’s hips stilled, and Austria felt hot fluid inside of him.

So this was penetrative sex between men, Austria thought with the part of his brain that never seemed to shut off. He pumped air between his lungs in long gasps until the spots in front of his eyes vanished.

The next things he registered were how sensitive the skin on his thighs felt—again, something that was not entirely new—and that he felt unable to move his legs even an inch.

“Austria?” Spain asked in a small voice.

“Hmm?” He couldn’t bring himself to say more.

“Are you … I mean, did I hurt you?” Spain sounded worried.

You mean, when didn’t you hurt me, a malicious part of Austria wanted to quip. He reined it in and settled for the truth.

“It stung when you spread me and it did hurt in the beginning,” he admitted. “But I don’t mind that you were chasing your own release at the end, which is what I think you are referring to.”

“I’m sorry.” Spain sounded sincere. “It gets easier if you do it more often.” There was an unspoken question in that statement, but Austria chose to ignore it for the time being. He had done his duty—the marriage had been consummated—but he didn’t know yet what he wanted for the future.

“Still,” Spain said. Austria felt the bed dip as he stood. He heard him move, but couldn’t bring himself to lift his head. “It was your first time. I should have been gentler.” Spain’s upper body entered Austria’s field of vision, holding a wet piece of cloth. “Allow me to clean you up, too?”

“Please.” Austria realised his own switch back to a formal tone. It seemed to have an effect on Spain: The way he cleaned him up was meticulous and efficient. Austria noted he had warmed the piece of cloth with his body—an act of care he appreciated.

“Tell me,” Austria asked, “if we hadn’t been ordered to consummate our marriage properly, would you have done all you did tonight?”

“No,” Spain answered at once. “I wanted you to enjoy it. I’d probably have stroked us off together, and that’s it. And you can keep caressing each other while you do that…” His voice trailed off. “Look, I think you’re clever and brave and beautiful, and I want to touch you. I’d want it if we weren’t married. But I’m worried I thwarted my own chances before I had any because we were doing what others expected of us.”

“Don’t be cross with me, but I believe I’m unable to think about that just now.” Austria only realised how true this was as he said it: He was exhausted; his legs felt like jelly; and he needed a good night’s sleep anyway after the dances, the chess match and Swabia’s and his own valiant efforts to thwart all spectators.

“Don’t misunderstand me,” he hurried to say as he saw the disappointment on Spain’s face. “If I say I need to think about it, I don’t mean no. I mean that I need to think about it, but I’m about to fall asleep. So … come to bed with me?”

Spain nodded. Then he doused the candles and went to bed, putting the blankets over them both as well as he could. Austria made a point of taking Spain’s hand.

It had been a long day, and he really needed to think. He also needed his legs to work again, but he assumed that problem would have solved itself by tomorrow.

#hetalia #hetabang 2020 #spaus #aph spain #aph austria #historical hetalia #aph belgium #aph bavaria #aph holy roman empire #aph saxony #hws spain #hws austria #hetalia fanfiction #aph fanfiction #aph #fanfiction #my fanfiction #katemarley #there be citrus fruit

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queen-eliza-schuyler · 4 years ago

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Work Place Problems- Chapter 9

“Thomas, we’re in public,” Alexander laughs as Thomas presses him against a wall in his office, the door open.

Thomas hums against his neck. “Are you complaining, doll?”

Alexander hums. “Well, I never said that. Please, do continue, Mr. Secretary.”

Thomas snickers and is about to kiss Alexander again when the noise of someone clearing their throat cuts through the silence.

George stood in the doorway, incredibly unamused.

“Hey, your excellency, how’s it going?” Alexander jokes, attempting to ease the static atmosphere.

“I actually came to speak with the two of you. You just happened to be together. Lucky or not, I’ll let you decide,” George says, a tired twinkle in typically bright eyes.

“Mr. Washington, are you ok? You don’t look too good,” Thomas said, genuinely concerned.

George takes a step forward before swaying a little.

Thomas and Alexander both rush over to Washington as he almost falls over.

“Sorry, boys. Age affects everyone at one point or another,” Washington says, weakly chuckling.

Thomas sends a worried look to Alexander. Washington admitting his moment of weakness. It was about the same chance that Thomas would stop wearing magenta.

“I know you’re busy,” Washington said, laying back on the chair.

“What do you need, sir? Sir?” Alexander says, slightly panicking.

Washington paused and thought for a second. “I wanna give you a word of warning.”

“Sir, I don’t know what you heard but whatever it is, Jefferson started it,” Alexander said, the joke coming more meekly than he wanted.

“Thomas Jefferson has resigned this morning,” Washington said, looking at Thomas dead in the eye now.

Thomas was taken aback. He never resigned. What the fuck is Washington playing at?

Alexander frowned. “He’s been with me all morning, though.”

Washington turned, now addressing Thomas. “I need a favor.”

“Whatever you say, sir,” Thomas said with finality.

“I need you to draft an address,” Washington said wearily.

“Yes! He resigned. You can finally speak your mind,” Alexander teases, poking Thomas’s side.

But Thomas wasn’t stupid. He could see Alexander gazing at Washington through the corner of his eye.

“No, he’s stepping down so he can run for President,” Washington said.

Thomas’s. Jaw. Dropped. Right through the damn floor.

“What?” Alexander said, confused.

“I’m stepping down. I’m not running for President,” Washington said.

Thomas blinked. “I’m sorry, what?”

Washington smiled tiredly.

He takes them and pulls them into his office.

He pulls out a bottle of whiskey and the three sit down.

Washington pours the three of them a glass. “One last time. Relax, have a drink with me. One last time. Let’s take a break tonight and then we’ll teach them how to say goodbye.”

Hamilton felt confused. “No, sir, why?”

“I wanna talk about neutrality,” Washington said, ignoring Alexander.

Thomas shifts in his seat. “Sir, with Britain and France on the verge of war, is this the best time-”

Washington continues nonetheless. “I want to warn against partisan fighting.”

“But-” Alexander tried again.

“Pick up a pen, start writing. I wanna talk about what I have learned, the hard-won wisdom I have earned,” Washington reprimands gently.

Thomas does one more last ditch attempt. “As far as the people are concerned, you have to serve. You could continue to serve.”

Washington smiles warmly. “No. One last time. The people will hear from me one last time and if we get this right, we’re gonna teach them how to say goodbye.

Alexander didn’t let him speak for long. “Mr. President, they will say you’re weak.”

Washington shakes his head. “No, they will see we’re strong.”

Alexander is giving up and just grasping for excuses now. “Your position is so unique!”

“So I’ll use it to move them along,” Washington says gently.

“Why do you have to say goodbye?” Alexander asks.

Washington leans back, a nostalgic expression on his face. “If I say goodbye, the nation learns to move on. It outlives me when I’m gone. Like the scripture says: ‘Everyone shall sit under their own vine and fig tree and no one shall make them afraid.’ They’ll be safe in the nation we’ve made. I wanna sit under my own vine and fig tree. A moment alone in the shade. At home in this nation we’ve made. One last time.”

Alexander finally amends, shaking fingers grabbing his glass. “One last time,” he recites.

That evening, Washington had left for Virginia for good as Alexander started reading his departing letter.

Alexander clears his throat once before he starts. “Though, in reviewing the incidents of my administration, I am unconscious of intentional error. I am nevertheless too sensible of my defects not to think it probable that I may have committed many errors. I shall also carry with me the hope that my country will view them with indulgence and that after forty-five years of my life dedicated to its service with an upright zeal, the faults of incompetent abilities will be consigned oblivion, as I myself must soon be to the mansions of rest. I anticipate with pleasing expectation that retreat in which I promise myself to realize the sweet enjoyment of partaking, in the midst of my fellow-citizens, the benign influence of good laws. Under a free government, the ever-favorite object of my heart, and the happy reward, as I trust of our mutual cares, labors, and dangers.��

The council silently sits for a moment to remember the great man that now was resting at his home.

Thomas clears his throat causing everyone to look his way.

He smirks at the recognition and starts.

“After our dear president retired, I have decided I will be running for president against our very own, John Adams,” Thomas declares, faking his kind attitude towards the man.

People in the room already had a sneaking suspicion that Thomas hated Adams but the infliction on his voice was just the icing on the cake.

Adams crosses his arms but let’s out a very pained smile.

Alexander tried not to laugh at the tension in the room.

He knew whether Thomas won or not, Thomas would still always have more power.

#thomas jefferson #alexander hamilton #jamilton

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dailyaudiobible · 4 years ago

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05/10/2021 DAB Transcript

1 Samuel 8:1-9:27, John 6:22-42, Psalm 106:32-48, Proverbs 14:34-35

Today is May 10th, welcome to the Daily Audio Bible I am Brian it’s great to be here with you today as is every single day, every single day. It is an honor to come around the Global Campfire. And take the next step forward as we move our way through the entire bible in a year. And we are well under way as we’ve mentioned a number of times this is the 5th month of the year. And I guess we are 1/5 of the way through that month already. So, it just keeps going, step by step. Right now, the territory that we are in the Old Testament, is the book of 1 Samuel and we are learning about Samuel’s life. We have learned about his origin, his childhood and now he is the judge, a prophet, and the priest of God before the people. And today we will meet a person that is going to become pivotal. His name is Saul. 1 Samuel 8 and 9.

Commentary:

Okay. So, we’re at the beginning of a week, so we’re gonna be spending our week here in 1 Samuel working through the territory that we’re entering into. So, it’s kind of important probably that we just re-orient ourselves to the context that we’re in. And we don’t have to go all the way back to Genesis, we’ve kind of done this review but we know who the children of Israel are by now. And we know that they’re in the promised land, we went there with Joshua. We watched all this happen. And then we saw the rise of the Judges after Joshua’s leadership and after everybody who was under his leadership had died. So, in other words the generations changed completely. Then we have the rise of the Judges, there was no king. This is something that Judges told us over and over, there was no king in Israel and everybody did what was right in their own eyes. And so, as we went through those centuries of the judges, we saw that. We saw this kind of downward slide. Even though they would return and a judge would come along and give them victory and redeem them and they would continue to slide further and further away. Then Samuel comes along, right? And Samuel is the last judge of Israel. And it’s a beautiful story with Elkenah and Hannah and going to Shiloh and her praying and her bringing her little guy after the Lord gives her a son. She brings him back and dedicates him to the Lord and this is who Samuel is. So, Samuel grows up and becomes the judge of Israel and he has some sons of his own. And this is actually what sets up the big ask, “give us a king. Like let’s have a monarchy instead of this thing that we have now.” And this happened because Samuel was getting old was appointing his sons to become the judges of Israel. And some of the elders came to Samuel and they came humbly but they were like that’s not what we…we don’t see that working out, that’s not what we want. Your sons are not like you Samuel. They don’t judge like you. We’re not being put into good hands, in other words. So, they ask for a king. And it’s interesting because before Samuel right, Eli was the high priest. And he had two sons, Phinehas and Hophni, remember? And they were kind of scoundrels. And they were pretty explicit about that. And they died in battle. And Eli died that same day. So, Samuel grows up and he’s got two sons and it looks like it’s gonna be a repeat. And so, this is that context then that causes the people to ask for a king to be appointed over them. Samuel’s old, he’s not gonna live forever and they don’t want his two sons to judge over them in any way. So, they want Samuel to appoint a king over them. And that’s when we’re introduced to that man, this tall, imposing, handsome man named Saul who is of the tribe of Benjamin. And we remember just a few days ago we saw the tribe of Benjamin just about annihilated. And so, it’s from this tribe of Benjamin that this man Saul emerges. And Samuel is about to tell him that his whole life is gonna change. And that is where we’re headed. That’s where we’ll be heading into. Saul will teach us much about our own character and motivations. And so, let’s buckle up and stay tuned in these coming days.

Prayer:

Father we thank You for Your word. We thank You for all of the different people that we have been able to meet from times gone by. And we’ve been able to kind of meet them and watch them and observe them and see how their lives go and what motivates them. And we get to see a larger story of people, how they ebb and flow in their national existence. And so, we are grateful. We are grateful for Your Holy Spirit to lead and guide us into all truths. And we are thankful for the examples in the scriptures to illuminate so many of life’s paths. In fact, all of the pathways that we are motivated to take, we have illustrations and so we are so grateful. And so, Holy Spirit come, plant these seeds deep in our hearts as we move forward into these emerging stories. Come, challenge us forward. we pray. In the name of Jesus, we ask. Amen.

Announcements:

dailyaudiobible.com is home base, it is the website it’s where you find out what’s going on around here. Always something or another.

Still a little bit glowing from celebrating Mother’s Day yesterday with China having her first Mother’s Day and just being there with Jill. So, hopefully all of you mother’s all over the world felt loved, respected, and cherished yesterday.

And now we move into this week. And by the time we finish this week we will be at the dead center of another one of our months together. Day-by-day, step-by-step, it just keeps going. And so, I’m so, so honored that we’re still sailing. Day-by-day, step-by-step, we’re moving through the scriptures and they are speaking loud and clear affecting so many of the different aspects of our lives if we’re paying attention. And so, let’s stay connected to that journey.

And you can stay connected using the Community section of the website or the Daily Audio Bible app. That will get us to the Community section, that’s we’re the Prayer Wall is.

That will let us get into the Daily Audio Bible Shop. There are resources for deepening this journey or just personalizing this journey. So, check out those resources in the Shop.

If you want to partner with the Daily Audio Bible, if what’s happening is life giving to you, then thank you for being life giving to it. It’s a community experience day-by-day, step-by-step and we wouldn’t be here if we weren’t here together. And so, thank you for your partnership. There’s a link on the homepage at dailyaudiobible.com. If you’re using the app you can press the Give button in the upper right-hand corner or the mailing address, if that is your preference, is P.O. Box 1996 Spring Hill Tennessee, 37174.

And, as always, if you have a prayer request or encouragement you can hit the Hotline button in the app, which is the little button at the top or you can dial 877-942-4253.

And that’s it for today. I’m Brian I love you and I’ll be waiting for you here tomorrow.

Community Prayer and Praise:

Hi DAB family, this is Rob Still Worship Dude in Nashville. And just responding to some prayer requests I heard today May 6th. I want to lift up Lisa the Encourager and the loss of your dad. Yeah, the same thing…I lost my father back in March and my testimony is really similar to yours. And I just wanted to pray for...first, we mourn with those who mourn, all who have lost loved ones recently, we mourn with you. And Lisa, we pray especially for you and…and your brothers and they would…everyone would walk in the fullness of God’s purpose and destiny and salvation for them. Secondly, I want to lift up Walta the Burning Bush who would not be Devoured and your family members that are caught up in that crisis in Chad. We pray for their safety and protection, God that You would send mighty angels to surround them and protect them. And Lord we pray for all believers in that part of Africa Lord who are at great risk. We lift up the persecuted church to You. God and we’re crying out to the Lord most High. Lord, send Your angel armies God to protect and deliver them. And finally, I do want to pray for David, the Young man who’s in college, he’s a pastor’s son. And brother, I just want to pray God’s anointing to be upon you, that you would walk in the ways of the Lord, and that you would continue to listen to the voice of conviction just to help you. It’s…it’s hard as a young man these days to…to walk with purity. And so, I’m praying that for you and for all young people. Just let the…I just pray the Spirit of the Lord would just come upon you and bless you richly. Alright guys, the Lord be with you.

Hi DAB community this is Ming from London, UK. Just calling in to pray for some of you guys that I’ve heard at the end of the DAB podcast. I pray for __ from Lincoln, Kansas. Lord I pray, I lift up her to You, whatever she is going through, I pray that You be with her. I pray for MJ from central Illinois I pray that You be with her brother-in-law after he was admitted to the hospital. Also, I pray Lord, for Lucas from Albuquerque. I pray for his girlfriend’s mother. I pray that she’s able to find a good, loving and supportive church community. And I pray that Lord You send Your angels to protect her from the forces of evil, from her ex-husband who used to deal in witchcraft. I just pray this all in Your name. And yeah…yeah, I’m just praying for that for each and every one of you that was…

Hey Daily Audio Bible family, To Be a Blessing in California. I want to thank you all for praying for me in advance cause I know that you will. I have had a challenging year along with everyone else. I’m not alone but at this moment I’m experiencing just the enormity of the loneliness and the isolation, still wanting to connect with people and be in community and not being able to do that in person has been really hard. I recognize that my love language is to give gifts. And so, that has not happened, and I’ve been depleted from that. So, what do I want? Please pray for me in my relationship with Jesus. I have been…not going to Him with everything. Instead, I’ve been going to other things to try and get some enthusiasm and energy and interest during the times that I’ve just felt sorry for myself, actually. But I want to have a fresh relationship with Jesus. And I just ask that you would pray for me to that end. Thank you so much for doing that. Again, as I said earlier, I know you will and I’m grateful for each one of you. God bless. To Be a Blessing in California.

Hey this is Daniel Johnson Junior from beautiful Cincinnati, Ohio and I just heard the message from Alexander Shultz Annette Alison’s son. First of all, what a praise report it is to be able to hear your voice young man because your mom has prayed for you so many times even through this forum. And we have prayed for you. And I just appreciated hearing your laugh, the joy in your voice and I’m so glad that God’s been working in your life. And praise be to Him. So, that’s all I got to say. It’s…again, from beautiful Cincinnati, Ohio, it’s Daniel Johnson Junior. God Bless you and make it great day.

Hey fam it’s Pepper in Iowa. I wanted to share a small praise. My oldest son is agnostic and with this move to Missouri he’s going with us at 26. I told him we were doing this because this is what God wanted us to do and He’s like, “ok. Seems right. So we’ll go.” The other day he was out in the garage with my husband, and he told my husband “I think my mom’s right” and has been asking about…said, when you obey God and listen to God the devil throws wrenches in it to try to push you back.” My husband was taken back and all I could think was praise Jesus because that means his heart is getting soft. So, I’d appreciate prayers for my sons. Mick is the oldest and the one that’s softening the most. AJ and Conner are still probably truly agnostics. But if He’s working on the hardest son first, I know He’s gonna gettim all. So, I just wanted to share that praise with y’all. It’s amazing, I can’t even express the…I don’t have the words, I just don’t. It is God and God alone doing it. Because all I’ve ever done is…I did take them to church as children. And even now all…I listen to this app. He listens, you know, he hears it, he asks questions, I do my best. And I don’t push it because I know him. But if his hearts softening, Oh Glory to the God of our Father because He’s the one doing it. I love you all, bye.

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merakimousumi · 4 years ago

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Spirituality - the pathless path !

The story series - Part 2 of 2

Dev Smiled. The mysterious one , the mischievous one. He cleared his voice and made himself comfortable.

He started saying “look I follow every advise which are simple and does not take much of my effort in my life .Ultimately I realised when with I fight with reality I create my struggle. What is the point of struggle , when things can work out well”

My father and mother as you are aware were extremely religious and rituals were daily part of life. Bowing to deity before leaving the house, taking a spoonful of curd before examinations or interview , getting blessing by touching the feet of the elders and so many. I do them all , without questioning whether I believe in them or not, I realize in my early age that it gives me time to do my own stuff and not get into lecture for next 2 hours and sometimes every week , spoiling mood , missing football , music and all those things that mattered at that time.

At this point , Ramesh smiled . Dev was the favourite in school and college. He would always agree with the teachers and would go out of the way, beyond curriculum to provide the assistance. He was favourite of my parents too. He would come home , touch my parents feet always. He would eat everything offered without uttering a word. Dev hated sweets and bitter gourd, however whenever my mother gave him sweet and bitter gourd during lunch visit he would eat them and also appreciate them. Later when asked why did he not refuse, he would always smile and say “one day I can keep my dislike aside, she your mother made them with so much love so appreciated her efforts too “

Knowing this nature, Ramesh was sure that Dev would have integrated this in other aspects in my life, curious to see what is the context now.

Dev now was looking into the moonless night, full of stars and threw his hands over his head as if he has gone to that time he is about to speak. This gentleman who was a Hindu Monk or Sadhu( as mentioned in India ) use to come home every two to three years and stayed for few days. He would instruct my parents to follow some rituals daily, monthly and on specific occasions and it was meticulously followed too. The monk visited soon after demise of my father and that particular day when he was about to leave and he looked at my mother and told her that unless Dev does not surrender to God his life would be full of misery. My mother immediately bowed to his feet and requested to share guidance and save her son from the misery. He raised hand and said softly ask him to chant the name of Almighty daily without fail.

After the monk was gone the only discussion that happened in the next few days with mother was when should the chanting be done and what should be chanted. Mother forced me to read the religious books aloud so that it can he heard, according to her this is chanting, it should create sound and heard. The situation became different when informed that new city is calling for duty.

Mother would not accompany as she felt there are lot of memories of my father and she just cannot leave this surrounding where she has spent 40 years of her married life. There were many relatives around and domestic help , from taking care perspective there was no issue. She wanted Dev to follow the guidance of monk , the promises was not being accepted. Gopal use to be the caregiver of my father and with my father’s death he was jobless. He owned a small land which never yield him enough to sustain him and his wife. Gopal and his wife happily joined me since last 20 years. The responsibility to check and remind me of my chanting was given to Gopal and his wife by my mother. In the coming days daily after returning from work, these two people would never fail to remind me and they stood till something happened. Something workable needed to be done , Dev asserted!!

One day Dev just found the way to follow the instructions of the monk too. Dev called Gopal and his wife and informed them. Both looked astonished however nodded. Since then Dev calls him “ Gopal” and in various names of Lord Krishna and in this way his promise to mother has been fulfilled. There is no separate Hari, Keshav, Madhava, Murli or anyone. Gopal is everyone. On weekends and holidays the number of calling increases, saying this Dev laughed rolling his head. Its been 20 years and is working fine.

Ramesh did not laugh, he was amazed that his friend actually followed the instructions of the monk and fulfilled the promise of his mother so effortlessly. While there is a huge possibility that this is not be written in anywhere in scriptures, however the love and respect that was observed in last two days , there is no denial that the purpose is met. Something did bother Ramesh within and he was unable to pin it down at that moment. At least the mystery is solved !!

Soon Gopal came with another round of black tea. Dev told Gopal that he just briefed about the name. Gopal smiled and nodded his head softly mentioned “I am just following what mother asked me and making sure that you are following it too”.

Next morning as the friends bid goodbye to see each other again. Dev told him that he is eagerly looking for the article to read once it is published. Ramesh sat next to Gopal who was driving the car. Suddenly he turned and asked how does he feels when Dev calls him with different names . Gopal without even loosing sight from the road calmly expressed “ Sense the love, feel the joy by which one calls , name is just incidental. I only respond to that love and joy”. There was a silence after listening as if this frail person understands without having to read, chant , meditate. Just before getting down from the car , I again turned and asked “is Gopal your real name ?” He smiled and said “ no saheb , my name is Rahim”.

There was a shiver that went to the spine that can be felt even today.

Sitting in the first class compartment absorbed in thoughts looking outside the window, the notes made from the interview slipping its pages on its own on the lap, Ramesh just could not gather who is Spiritual and what is spirituality. Is it the Guru who he met in the ashram who has ocean of knowledge by reading various scriptures, the enormous practice that he has done, the congeraression on he speaks, his friend Dev who found his way with absolute simplicity in the midst of an extremely busy life or was it Gopal alias Rahim who dedicated everything to the call of love and joy.

One thing that came again and again , there are many paths to the mountain, all would lead to the top. One just needs to stop circling around the base of the mountain and not tell people which road is easier or the best route to take.

Almost forgot to mention, the interview and the topic was never published because Ramesh realised that the sanity and sacredness that he has gathered during the trip was far beyond the understanding of many. This journey of spirituality is individual and can be quantifiable only through direct experience. He has moved to India within one year of that encounter and has opened sports academy for the under privileged kids where he gives shelter and food.

#spiritualjourney #follow my blog #new to blogging #writeblogging #blog post #Write your feelings #excerpt from a story i'll never write #Alan Watts #sri nisargadatta maharaj #writeaway #followmypage #following my dreams

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hiswordsarekisses · 4 years ago

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A beautiful testimony from my daughter:

Last night, we saw Jesus heal a man, who couldn't even move himself to the water, by simply telling him to rise, take up his bed and walk. This was on the Sabbath (Saturday).

“The Jews therefore said to him who was cured, “It is the Sabbath; it is not lawful for you to carry your bed.””

‭‭John‬ ‭5:10‬ ‭

First, what in the world! This man was not able to move, he was lame, and now he is up walking and all the Jews could see was that he was breaking their own twisted version of the law. They missed the entire point because they were so blinded by their own self righteousness. They took the perfect law of God and added so many things to it where it was now a burden. God gave us the Sabbath as a gift! He knows that our bodies need rest, He knows we need dedicated time with Him to reset and He knows that we are busy and gave us a day to minister to other people. Healing someone is not breaking the law, carrying your bed for the first time in 38 years is not breaking the law of God, it was breaking the burdensome added traditions they created. They witnessed a miracle, they witnessed a spiritual force of immediate healing yet the Jews never questioned if maybe they might be wrong. That's where self deception happens. We absolutely must remain open to being wrong. Even John the Baptist had a moment of questioning, but not the Jews. See the difference? If we are so bent on being right because we are arrogant or because our pastor told us so, we can be just like these Jews and miss the whole point, which brings me to my second point..

Today, the rolls look different. We have mass lawlessness and a misuse of grace that has utterly blinded people from the miracle making hand of God. Let me use a part of my testimony as an example. When God rescued me when I truly called out to Him with a broken and contrite heart at Fort Stewart, when I admitted to Him that I absolutely could not even meet Him half way because I am so wretched, blind and naked and I don't even know where to start- a miracle happened and even down to my very perspective changed. Some immediate, some took time and some He is still working on and will continue until that Day of His great coming. Trying to wrap my mind around how I thought before that day and how drastically different I think now alone is not something I can comprehend. I always loved Yeshua but I still carried my burden until Fort Stewart. Now, because of this miracle that happened in my heart and in my mind- I went to mush over God. I began to hang on every single thing He has ever done or said. I began just loving Him so much deeper where I WANTED to do every single thing He instructed me to do. Not to be saved, but because I am saved, because of what He did for me, because I trust Him even when it doesn't make sense to me. However, that's where that verse kicks in, "all those who live godly WILL suffer persecution." I have been accused of being a legalist, trying to work my way into heaven, being a Pharisee and so much more by the people who are blind just like those Pharisees. (So in this story- we have Pharisees twisting the law to make it more burdensome and accusing someone of breaking the law who just got healed and in my story, we see a grossly misuse of grace where people see me keeping the NOT twisted commandments of God because of my love for Him and they ridicule me for not taking part in their lawlessness and misuse of grace.)

They don't understand that deep love for God that pushes you to a level of trust for Him that causes you to walk in His ways BECAUSE of that love and trust. They haven't gotten to the part of the walk where the burden falls off. Revelations tells us that the remnant of God (the saved) are those that have the testimony of Yeshua Jesus the Christ and keep the commandments of God. All through out the Bible it talks about lawlessness not inheriting the kingdom and all of this but we as a people have become lazy and have leaned on the word of a pastor or a human made Bible study rather than reading that Bible for ourselves and crying out to God. It never offends me because I have read that this is what I'm called to and I know the state that they are in and it breaks my heart into a million pieces which then pushes me to pray for them to gain a love of the truth (without a love of the truth, the Bible says we will be deceived and not inherit the kingdom.) The churches today are twisting scripture the same way that the Jews did, the enemy just dressed it up different. The Bible says this would happen. It's all in there! The thought of anyone I know perishing for a lack of knowledge and that being their own fault, kills me. But all we can do is pray. Pray for the scales to fall off their eyes, pray for the God who opens the eyes of the blind, to open the eyes of the blind! No matter how beautifully you put it, you can not make a blind man see. You can read the same verses a million times and then one day, God pulls the scales off your eyes and you read the verse and you fly backward like WHAT! "Seeing they will not see and hearing they will not hear." The Bible says we can't even have the want to repent without Him giving it to us. It's called the gift of repentance. Without that, we are lost. Now, He can show us the wickedness in our hearts, but are we willing to humble ourselves before Him and actually repent and turn from those wicked ways and try to not do that thing again, or will we justify it and say, "God knows my heart" and continue committing lawlessness. I never want to hear what scripture tells us will happen to many. It says they will come to Him saying, "Lord Lord, have we not cast out demons, healed the sick and raised the dead in your name!?" And he will say to them, "Depart from me, you workers of lawlessness, I never knew you."

(Example of us and God but in terms understandable: in this scenario, you represent God and the kids represent your people. You love your kids right? Do you know more than them? Because you've been around longer right? Sometimes you tell them to do something like "don't run out in the street." They might not understand at first, but hopefully they honor you, love you, and respect you enough to trust what you said is in their best interest. YOU know they can get hit by a car, but they might not understand that yet. Are you being controlling? Are they being legalistic by listening to you without understanding why?

Spend time with Him. Don't trust the word of pastors or anyone else, don't even trust my word. Get your Bible and just read. Pray for wisdom, knowledge and understanding. The more you read, the more you will understand. It's hard at first, but it gets easier.

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orthodoxydaily · 4 years ago

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Saints&Reading: Sun., Oct. 18, 2020

October 5_Julian calendar

The Holy Martyr Charitina of Amisus (+304)

The Holy Martyress Charitina was orphaned in childhood and raised like an actual daughter by the pious Christian Claudius. The young woman was very pretty, very sensible, kind and fervent in faith. She imparted to other people her love for Christ, and she converted many to the way of salvation. During a time of persecution under the emperor Diocletian (284-305), Saint Charitina was subjected to horrible torments for her strong confession of the Lord Jesus Christ, and she died with prayer to the Lord (in the year 304).

Damian the Presbyter and Healer (1070), Jeremia (1071) and Matthew 1085) the Perspicacious, Wonderworkers of Pechersk of the Kiev Cave

The Lives of the Monks Damian the Presbyter and Healer, Jeremii (Jeremia) and Matfei (Matthew) the Perspicacious, Wonderworkers of Pechersk, were described by the Monk Nestor the Chronicler (Comm. 27 October). The Monk Damian (+ 1071) still remembered the Baptism of Rus (in year 988). The zealous imitator of the Monk Feodosii (Theodosii, Comm. 3 May) was gentle, industrious and obedient, to the joy of all the brethren. He spent the entire night at prayer and reading the Divine Scriptures. Saint Damian was strict at fasting and, except for bread and water, he ate nothing. The Lord rewarded him with the gift of treating maladies. The Monk Jeremii had of the Lord the gift to see into the future, and to see into the moral condition of a person. The monk died in old age (+ c. 1070). The Monk Matfei (+ c. 1088) was also endowed with the gift of seeing into the spiritual world. By his insight the elder would tell brethren, things to avoid doing of danger for the soul. In the Iconographic Original it says: "Matfei with the image of a perspicacious elder, from black greyed of beard like Vlas, in black klobuk, a monastic robe, hands pressed to the heart".

The Nun Kharitina, Princess of Lithuania (1281)

The Nun Kharitina, Princess of Lithuania, pursued asceticism in a Novgorod women's monastery in honour of the holy apostles Peter and Paul, built in Sinich hill. Having resolved to dedicate her life to the Lord, she accepted monasticism. For her virtuous life the nun was made hegumeness of the monastery. And until the time of her death, she was a sister to all by way of humility, purity and strict temperance. She reposed in the year 1281 and was buried in the Petropavlov (Peter and Paul) monastery church. In the Iconographic Original it says: "The holy and righteous Kharitina, head of the Petrovsk maidens monastery, at Novgorod. She was born of Lithuania

John 20:11-18 (8th Matins Gospel)

11But Mary stood outside by the tomb weeping, and as she wept she stooped down and looked into the tomb.12And she saw two angels in white sitting, one at the head and the other at the feet, where the body of Jesus had lain.13Then they said to her, "Woman, why are you weeping?" She said to them, "Because they have taken away my Lord, and I do not know where they have laid Him."14Now when she had said this, she turned around and saw Jesus standing there, and did not know that it was Jesus.15 Jesus said to her, "Woman, why are you weeping? Whom are you seeking?" She, supposing Him to be the gardener, said to Him, "Sir, if You have carried Him away, tell me where You have laid Him, and I will take Him away 16 Jesus said to her, "Mary!" She turned and said to Him, "Rabboni!" (which is to say, Teacher).17 Jesus said to her, "Do not cling to Me, for I have not yet ascended to My Father; but go to My brethren and say to them, 'I am ascending to My Father and your Father, and to My God and your God.' "18 Mary Magdalene came and told the disciples that she had seen the Lord, and that He had spoken these things to her.

Corinthians 11:31-12:9

31The God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, who is blessed forever, knows that I am not lying.32 In Damascus the governor, under Aretas the king, was guarding the city of the Damascenes with a garrison, desiring to arrest me; 33 but I was let down in a basket through a window in the wall, and escaped from his hands.

1 It is doubtless not profitable for me to boast. I will come to visions and revelations of the Lord: 2 I know a man in Christ who fourteen years ago-whether in the body I do not know, or whether out of the body I do not know, God knows-such a one was caught up to the third heaven. 3 And I know such a man-whether in the body or out of the body I do not know, God knows- 4 how he was caught up into Paradise and heard inexpressible words, which it is not lawful for a man to utter. 5 Of such a one I will boast; yet of myself I will not boast, except in my infirmities. 6 For though I might desire to boast, I will not be a fool; for I will speak the truth. But I refrain, lest anyone should think of me above what he sees me to be or hears from me. 7 And lest I should be exalted above measure by the abundance of the revelations, a thorn in the flesh was given to me, a messenger of Satan to buffet me, lest I be exalted above measure. 8 Concerning this thing I pleaded with the Lord three times that it might depart from me.9 And He said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for My strength is made perfect in weakness." Therefore most gladly I will rather boast in my infirmities, that the power of Christ may rest upon me.

#orthodoxy #orthodoxchristianity #ancientfaith #originofchristianity #spirituality #holyscripture #spirituality gospel sacredtexts wisdom

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simplyaservant · 5 years ago

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Walking with an Unknown God

I realize that Easter has already come and gone; however, I feel led to speak on a part of the story often overlooked. We all know the story of Easter: Jesus Christ died and rose from the grave on the third day. He spent a few short weeks on earth after his resurrection, before ascending to heaven.

Our story takes place in Luke 24, three days after Jesus was crucified. Two men are walking to the village of Emmaus discussing the life and death of Jesus. They are soon joined by a third man, who questions their saddened countenance. They explain that they had seen the prophet Jesus perform miracles, and had believed him to be the savior of Israel; however, he was crucified three days prior. To make matters worse, there were astonishing and disturbing. rumors of his resurrection.

There is a twist of irony with this story because the man these two men were speaking too was Jesus Christ. They told Jesus who they thought He was, how He suffered, and how some women believers told them that He is not dead but alive. Still, they did not recognize Him.

The lord was patient and began to explain to them the old testament books and the prophecies of his coming. And while the bible does not say which scriptures he used, I am sure it was the most magnificent bible study ever given. Yet, they still did not see him. Finally, when after Jesus blessed and broke bread with them, were their eyes opened and they understood. Suddenly Jesus disappeared and they they changed courses, and began their journey to Jerusalem where they met up with the other disciples.

It is easy to blame these two men for their insensitivity. How could they not recognize the newly risen savior as he walked beside them--especially considering their connection to his disciples. They were a hand stretch away from divinity--God himself rolled in the flesh--and believed in him not.

But how often do we do the exact same thing? These two men physically walked with the master, but they did not experience him in the way you and I can. In life, Christ walks beside us every day; yet there are times in our life where we are unable to recognize him, we cannot see or hear him for who he actually is. Like the two men, our eyes are closed unable to see the hand of God upon our lives.

These two men wept over Jesus' death, so they obviously cared for him in some capacity. And they believed that he had the potential to be the savior of Israel. But they did not know him for themselves, they only knew of him from others. Because if they had known him on a personal level, surely they would have seen him as Mary Magdalene did after her conversation with Jesus. But the men were distraught over the death of a prophet with the potential to save Israel, they could not see the answer to their prayers was right beside them.

Many of us are just like that: we know of God, but lack the personal relationship necessary to see him in a new light.

So we go about our lives like there is nothing extraordinary about them. Go to school, work, the store. Come home exhausted and watch a show on Netflix or Disney +. sing the newest IBC song in the car, without pondering the meaning of the words. Read our daily devotion, but do not open our bibles. Take a picture of a beautiful sunset, and maybe even thank the creator for painting it--but rarely realize that He created it for us.

Then late at night, we cry out to God and ask him why. Why hasn’t the vision happened yet? Where is my victory? Why am I still broken? Where are you Lord? And as you cry for God to notice you, he cries the same thing back. He is begging you to see him for who he truly is.

God has brought life into your situation, he holds all the answers that you are seeking but you're so fixated on the problem that you cannot see the solution to your problem is standing beside you. So encumbered by the grave and emotions associated with it that you cannot even take one step towards your God-ordained future, because you're so weighed down by the past.

Each and every one of us has different graves in our life. For some, our grave is three days old-someone said something means to us and we haven’t quite gotten over it yet. Others are a bit older. Weeks, months, even decades.

The grave holds our fears, failures, and mistakes. The could’ve beens, should’ve beens and most importantly the should NOT have beens. God has forgiven and forgotten, he has turned the page but we are unable to. We’re still looking at those dead things and cannot move on. Crying over our past mistakes while God is standing right there saying look at me, I’ve turned the page. You have a new life. But we cannot hear him

In Matthew, Jesus said he is the “way of truth and life, no man can know the father but by me”. You will never find your way in life, without knowing who the way really is. When you recognize God as that way, he will lead and direct your path. Once you see the God who walks beside you, the grave gains a new meaning. It is no longer a symbol of defeat, depression and death; but of victory, hope and life everlasting.

How does one gain a greater understanding of Jesus. Glad you asked, you get to know God the same way the two men did--by spending time with him. Dedicate time each day study his word and ask him to reveal how it applies to your life. Pray to him like he’s your closest confidant, someone you can share anything with no matter how big or small. As you deepen your relationship with Him, God will reveal his love and character to you in a greater way. And from that, newfound joy and confidence is birthed. One that is not predicated on your circumstances, but on the God who orders your steps.

#bible study

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surveys-at-your-service · 5 years ago

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Survey #243

honestly too lazy to think up random song lyrics here, so just have the survey.

What is the one thing you remember most about January of last year? Nothing. You look at the clock and it’s 11:11, do you wish? I never do, no. How do you think you will look 3 years from now? I pray the fuck to god I'm finally at a weight I want. And of course more tattoos and piercings. And colored hair. What would be number one on your bucket list? Meet, thank, and hug Mark profusely while ugly crying. How old do you think you’ll be when you make your will? I don't know. You get a text message. who do you hope it is? Sara. Are there any songs that you hear that just make you wanna dance? Not really, no. Do you get any of your songs from Limewire? lol how old is this... but no. I did when it was "the thing," though. You and your best friend get in a fight. Why do you think that is? I don't know. Probably said something that came across wrong over a text. What is your biggest annoyance at the time? Financial shit. You see the person you fell hardest for. What do you do? Apologize to him if he's even okay with me speaking a word to him and then letting him on his way because I don't want to make him think I'm still stuck on him. I'd wanna know how things are in his life, but I don't want him to get the wrong impression. It'd be better for both of us. Have/are you depressed? I mean I'm diagnosed with depression, but it's well-managed. At the moment I'm not *depressed*, no. Did you grow up in the United States? Yeah. Never left it, even. Do you call anybody "baby"? Besides my cat and snake, no. Who is the one person you can completely be yourself around? Sara. Are your pop-ups blocked on your computer? Yeah. Do you wear earrings on a normal basis? No. How old were you when you realized that life goes on? I don't know... This is such a vague question. But I guess probably when a childhood cat disappeared or died sometime in elementary school. Are your parent’s night owls or morning birds? Well, I don't live with Dad, but Mom is a night owl more than a morning bird for sure. She can be so grouchy in the morning. Do you like to sing? Eh. Who is your favorite author? *shrugs* I don't read enough. How many pillows are on your bed? Two. What’s your favorite thing about the holidays? Seeing my niece and nephew so excited. What is your favorite type of cake? Red velvet, baby. How many rings do you wear on a day-to-day basis? One. Have you ever been in a mental hospital as a patient? Multiple times. Probably WOULDN'T have been multiple if the psych hospitals here were worth a damn. Went to the same one like five-six times and one other and both sucked. It was a partial hospitalization program, WHICH ISN'T AS "SERIOUS" AS AN ACTUAL FUCKING PSYCH HOSPITALIZATION, that saved my ass. What’s your favorite brand of flavored water? None. Have you ever had an ulcer? No. Do you take birth control pills? Not anymore, no. I was only on them for serious period pain, but as of recently my psychiatrist wanted to test out how I do mood-wise without them, especially as it was a regular occurrence for me to be borderline or actually suicidal the day before my cycle started, and the whole week leading up to it was sketchy. So far, I've been fine - I think even better. I was on it for years, and I mean your body changes, so. Do you like soy sauce? Noooooo no no no. Do you have a good doctor? My psychiatrist is literally the reason I'm alive. That's no exaggeration. I would've killed myself by now if it wasn't for him setting my medicine right. I know I would've. My therapist is great, and my primary physician is fine. What’s your favorite store to browse around? Morph Market, ahaha. I love looking at all the reptile morphs, especially the ball pythons. Do you ever meditate on Scripture? No. Do you like poetry? Yes. Do you have expensive tastes? Nah. What is your favorite color? Pink, particularly lighter hues. Have you ever made a scrapbook? Yeah, for a little while when I was younger. What is a question you get asked too much? If my lip piercing hurt. It doesn't bother me, I'm just asked it most. Worst grade you’ve ever gotten? Zeros on things I didn't do/missed. Who are your 3 closest friends? Sara, Girt, and uh... Chelsea, I think. Maybe Lisa. What is something you have always wanted to do? Travel somewhere cool/really memorable. What are you listening to? A playthrough of The Last Guardian. God, I wanna play it so badly. Do you like the smell of cinnamon? It's one of my favorites, omg. Are you in a relationship? No. Do you like the band Hollywood Undead? Yeah. Do you like Taco Bell? Only the quesadillas, THE CINNABON DELIGHT THINGS, and fiesta potatoes. Who was the first person you spoke to today? My mom. Who was the last? I was just texting the woman who adopted Kaiju; she's catching me up on how she's doing, and apparently great! We're trying to plan a day for me to come see her. :> Have you told anyone you loved them today? Yeah. What song is stuck in your head right now? You mentioned HU, now "Bullet" is looping in my head lol. Does it snow where you live? Sometimes, but rarely a lot. What are you currently sitting/laying on? My bed. Have you ever dated a friend of one of your siblings? No. How old is your oldest living grandparent? 80-something. Do you wear contacts? No, I wear glasses, but I wish I could do contacts again considering I desperately want an undereye microdermal but it'd look stupid with glasses, so. Contacts just annoy me. Where are the last three places you went? Taco Bell, my doctor's appointment, and the gas station. Do you ever go hunting/fishing? I would never in my life hunt, and I don't even want to fish anymore. Both are cruel (hunting more than "cruel"...) imo. I'd only ever fish again if Dad asked me to go with him, because since I was a kid, that's always been our "thing," our bonding experience. I wouldn't be able to say no. Do you know anyone who is a nurse? A lot, actually. Would you prefer to own a lapdog or a bigger dog? Sigh. Didn't think I'd want a dog after Teddy, but as of very recently, I've found myself missing the companionship of one. I don't know if I'll end up with another, though, but if I do, I'd want a medium-sized one, like Teddy was. Are you more of a cat person? Yes. What is your worst subject? Math. Do you know anyone who plays guitar? Yeah. Do you play guitar? Not anymore. Have you had to have stitches at all in the last year? No. Have you ever stayed up all night and then gone to work in the morning? No. That sounds like hell. How many relationships have you been in so far this year? It's a week into January lmao. No. Do you prefer to be single or with someone? With someone. Though now that I am single, I kinda think that's for the better right now...? Eh idk. Do you have any tattoos? Yeah. Are you planning on getting any? Oh, plenty. My Mark tribute is getting tidied up by a great artist on the 4th next month and I CANNOT contain my excitement. Did you lose your virginity before you were sixteen? No. Have you ever dated someone who had a child? No, and I never would. What are the middle names of everyone in your family? Wow yeah, lemme share that on the Internet. Where did you go the last time you took a vacation? The beach. Would you ever consider adoption? I don't want kids so like, Who is someone you aspire to be like? Man, there's a lot of people who inspire me in different ways. I think the world knows I look up to the wisdom, determination, dedication, creativity, compassion, etc. etc. etc. of Mark, I adore the heart and empathy of Shane Dawson, Steve Irwin is my absolute idol in terms of passion for animals, and Jeffree Star's work ethic is like, unbelievable. There are plenty others, but those really stand out. How do you feel about your life right now? oof What is your favorite game show to watch? Family Feud with Steve Harvey. He is so fuckin funny. How good are you in trivia games? What’s your best category? Idk. I'm probably best with animal knowledge though, judging from games I've played along with. Would you much rather test your knowledge or share opinions? I guess it depends on the subject and with whom. How do you feel about word games? Fun. Who is your absolute favorite film director? TIM BURTON. THERE IS NO COMPETITION W/ HIM. When’s the last time had to cover a coworker’s shift? Never. Have you ever had a really unreliable coworker? I've never worked long enough to know. Have you ever had to have a ring resized? No. What is a question you would never ever ask somebody? "I would never ask someone what they weigh." <<< This. I'm not a doctor, so I don't see any situation where that'd be an appropriate question to ask anyone. What sounds like a rude word but really isn’t? I'm sure there's something, but idk rn. Have you ever made a blanket? If so, how did you make one? No. How many godparents do you have? Do they care about you? Zero, I think. What is something that should not exist? Rape. Is there a word you have an emotional connection to? It sounds weird I'm sure, but "petrichor" (the smell of the earth after it rains) makes me feel... weird. Nostalgic, anxious, melancholy. Shortly before becoming a couple, Jason and I were just outside at school while it was raining, and we wondered what that smell was called. When we went back to the computer lab (where we were after exams were done), we looked it up and found out "petrichor" was the term. I remember those days too clearly for them to have happened eight years ago. How about a sound? Any emotional connection to a sound? Ummm not that I can think of. Is there something coming up that you are dreading? Not really, no. Do you ever read graphic novels? No. What is the most ridiculous product you have ever seen? Oh idk. Are there any spiders in your home right now? I mean realistically, probably? None that I know of. What was the last thing that made you laugh hysterically? I can't remember exactly what it was, but something on YouTube. I think on Game Grumps. Are there any candy stores where you live? Not that I'm aware of. Do you own any fingerless gloves? Yeah, I still have them in my drawer, actually. I wore them every day in high school. Tell me about the last animal you touched. My cat Roman. :') Have you ever witnessed a birth? Only cats. Can you see your reflection from where you are sitting? No. Wait, yes I can, though only slightly. My snake's cage is just across the room, so I can see against the glass a bit. Quick! Sniff the air. What can you smell? Cat. .-. Have you ever been in a restroom that actually had a restroom attendant? No? What was the last photo you took of? A deer! There were like, seven or eight in the field just across the road a few evenings ago. My lens didn't go out as close as I'd want, but I took some as practice anyway. I only got a few shots though; I came out to the front porch, and after about a minute, they gradually went back into the woods. What do you look for in a mate? Physically and personality-wise. Am I the only one who hates when human couples are referred to as "mates"???? Idk man it shouldn't because we're just animals, but it's weird. ANYWAY, I don't have like, a concrete vision of a partner, but I do have some set-in-stone personality/moral alignments that are musts, such as just being a generally good person, empathetic, you must love animals or shoo, be in touch with their emotions, understanding, soft stuff like that. I also have a strong preference for having a good sense of humor, I lean more romantically towards outgoing people, you gotta be laid-back and approachable... that kind of stuff. Physically, I really, really don't care, but I think we all have preferences; ex., while it really doesn't matter to me ultimately, I tend to find longer hair on guys more attractive than short. Your thoughts on bacon? Ugh, I wish I didn't love it. I wanna be a vegetarian again so badly. What are your thoughts on little kids with cell phones? If they're of an age where they may be separated from their parents semi-regularly and without the constant presence of a guardian, I'm actually for them having *simple* cellphones. Emergencies exist, and even I, someone who doesn't even want kids, would be scared knowing my child is without an easy, quick method of contact with me. Now, remember I did say "simple" cellphones; I don't believe a little kid should grow up unhealthily attached to technology (like me lmao), so especially in developmental years, I wouldn't want my kid to be glued to their phone playing games or roaming the Internet too freely. What was the last lie you told? I'm not sure. Is there anyone in particular you always try to tune out? Ugh, yes. For political bullshit that I cannot stand hearing. Do you work out? No. What was the last thing you ate with a spoon? Uhhhh probably oatmeal. What is a food that you always are in the mood to eat? Ice cream lmao. Ever held a newborn animal? Yeah. Is there anything you’re in denial about? What? Maybe, idk. Have you ever been to a Chinatown? No. Do you prefer chunky or creamy peanut butter? CREAMY. Don't come near me with chunky pb. Do you stop to pick up heads-up pennies? No. Do you make a wish when you blow out your birthday candles? Yeah, even though I don't believe it does anything. It's just for the novelty of it. Do your pets have collars? Describe them: Bentley just has a blue, average collar. Roman doesn't because he absolutely hates them. What is the last thing you searched for online? Surveys. Do you use any scented lotions? What do they smell like? No. Do you have any friends that speak any languages you don’t understand? I mean yeah, Spanish is common in America.

#survey #quiz #questions #random #bored

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cchmissions · 5 years ago

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Passages Israel Trip 1/7/20

"Consider the birds of the air: they neither sow nor reap nor gather into barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not of more value than they?" -Matthew 6:26

This morning, some of us chose to wake up early and watch the sunrise over the Sea of Galilee. As I watched a night sky that's not terribly different than what we see in America give way to a new day, I couldn't help watching the birds flitting about their business and thinking about Matthew 6:26, especially with the knowledge that I'd soon be on the mountain where Jesus taught the core of His message, including this charge to consider the birds. Right now, if you asked me to tell you about this trip, I'd only have a single word: contrast. Contrast between the grimy streets of Bethlehem and the raw beauty of the Mediterranean sunset., between the kindergarten/bomb shelter near Gaza that has no south-facing windows to protect the children against snipers and the peaceful snowy peak of Mount Hermon that beckoned us from the Golan Heights, and between the widow of terrorism who spoke to us about her husband's life and the simple placard outside the Garden Tomb in Jerusalem: "He is not here. He is Risen!"

The contrast between the kingdoms we've built and the one God is establishing for eternity and between our work and the work of God.

We have the privilege on this trip to see many of the locations where Jesus' life and ministry played out and where God intervened to supersede our work with His. After the sunrise, we went directly to the church of the Beatitudes, near where Jesus gave the sermon on the mount. This was many people's favorite church we've seen. It was relatively simple, and the focus of the area didn't seem to be the church as much as the mountain itself--the Church has an expansive balcony and garden overlooking the Sea of Galilee several hundred feet below us. Here, we had the opportunity to hear a short devotional on the paradigm shift Jesus laid out on this mountain, from a life defined by output to a life defined by heart. We then took some time to journal, pray, and reflect on both the sermon and the trip.

From there, we went to the Tabgha (Church of the Primacy of Peter)--purportedly where Jesus asked Simon Peter three times if he loved Jesus. This church was directly on the shore of the sea of Galilee, so many of us merely poked our heads into the building and immediately went down to dip our toes into the water where Jesus walked. Lance then gave a tremendous word on this exchange between Jesus and Peter: Jesus meets us where we are, and regardless of our material abilities, we are needed.

From Tabgha, we left to see the ruins of the city of Capernaum. This was a fishing village that was demolished by an earthquake in the 8th century, and has a spot that is now venerated as Simon Peter's house. Unfortunately, as Lance pointed out, Peter took his mailbox with him when he moved out, so we can't know for certain. This place offered another stunning view of the Sea of Galilee, and here Jody described a Biblical event that happened in Capernaum--the four men lowering their crippled friend through the roof to Jesus. He challenged us to lay our spiritual life at the center of our lives in front of Jesus, and see what healing comes from that act of obedience.

Next, we had lunch--authentic "St. Peter's fish," Tilapia. Our next stop was one of my favorites: a brief cruise on the sea of Galilee. Here, Jody challenged us to greater faith as our boat was rocked by the same waves that swamped Peter. This was particularly impactful for me; having seen these places with my own eyes, faith will be easy for the immediate future, but the action piece won't be as easy. Jody's challenge was simple: if you have greater faith, what's next? What happens after God works powerfully, and you find yourself back in the boat, having trod upon the waves? After this challenge, we sang. The lyrics came alive as a storm blew in and the sea changed within minutes from flat and calm to whitecaps blowing sea spray: "So I will call upon your name // and keep my eyes above the waves // when oceans rise, my soul will rest in your embrace // for I am yours, and you are mine"

From here, we got to see Magdala, an archeological discovery that was only made in 2009: a first century city, including synagogue, on the shores of Galilee. Mary Magdalene would have called this place home. Scripture speaks often of Jesus moving around the area of Galilee and teaching in the synagogues. The ruins we saw would have been a prime location for Jesus to teach and further His ministry. The modern addition was a beautiful series of chapels, all dedicated to women of the faith. I particularly appreciated this spot and that decision: even our Jewish tour guide expressed her appallment with the Church's ignorance and treatment of women, especially with the powerful ways women act and are shown in Scripture. This area presents a powerful push back to the original beauty of Scripture.

Our last stop today was Yardenit, a place along the Jordan River where Jesus' baptism may have taken place. I expected to be disgusted by the touristy nature of this place and how it makes a declaration of faith into a bus stop, but I was very surprised at what I saw instead: groups from east Asia, Ghana, and other nations singing, dancing, and praising God as they were all baptized. I will never know their hearts, but I know what I saw: the name of the Lord being proclaimed with glad hearts. The river Jordan in this spot is nothing like I had ever pictured it--it's not a desert. It's actually quite lush, and not too different from some oversized creeks in Missouri.

This day, like all on this trip, has been packed full of stops, things to see, and information to digest. Today, though, was much more personal. Our goal wasn't to learn, but to experience. I'll never read scripture the same way after seeing the things we saw today.

Thank you all for your prayers and support on this trip. As incredible as Israel is, we're growing more excited to be home in America.

In Christ Alone,

Adam Brooks

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showbizchicago · 5 years ago

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Interview with Pulitzer Prize Winning Playwright TONY KUSHNER

Known for his groundbreaking works including the Pulitzer Prize-winning Angels in America and the Olivier-awarded Caroline, Or Change, Tony Kushner has become one of the most prolific playwrights of our generation. I sat down with Mr. Kushner who was in Chicago to receive the Chicago Tribune Literary Prize as part of the Chicago Humanities Festival. MJR:Let’s talk about The Intelligent Homosexual’s Guide to Capitalism and Socialism with a Key to the Scriptures, a new work that you developed at the Guthrie Theatre in Minneapolis this past year. How did the concept come to fruition for you? TK: The way all ideas come about. I had been thinking for a very long time about writing it a play that dealt specifically with LGBT issues and I had also been thinking of dealing with Marxism onstage in the Perestroika era. I’ve always wanted to do something about American Marxism or American Communism specifically so all of that came together when Joe Dowling asked me to do a new play for the celebration that the Guthrie did of my work. They performed Caroline, Or Change and 5 short plays last spring. MJR: Speaking of Caroline, Or Change, the Chicago production mounted by Court Theatre won four Joseph Jefferson Awards including Best Musical was an unequivocal success. Tell us about your partnership with Jeanine Tesori during the development of Caroline. TK: Jeanine is an amazingly talented composer. In my opinion the best composer writing for the theatre living. I am enormously happy and consider myself very fortunate that we hooked up. I never enjoyed working with anyone as much as I enjoyed working with Jeanine. We’re currently working on a new piece together. MJR: Story-wise, Caroline, or Change explored your upbringing in Louisiana. What was the process of transferring a semi-autobiographical narrative to the musical stage? TK: Well of course Caroline is a fictional character. The character is loosely based on the woman who worked as a maid for my family when I was a kid. It was actually dedicated to her. She just turned 80. There are episodes and certain details in the play that are absolutely from my childhood. I grew up in Louisiana. But the piece is not autobiographic in any kind of reliable sense. The character of Caroline is some degree based on but many of the details of her life are different.

Jeff Award Winner E. Faye Butler in CAROLINE OR CHANGE MJR: As a playwright, what was the most challenging component of musicalizing text to propel a narrative? TK: I wrote the whole thing before I started working with Jeanine so in a way it was like writing a play. It was in a loosely rhymed and metered verse. To some degree it’s like learning a new language because there’s a lot about musical theatre that requires very specific skills that I do not have. I have very little experience working with the form. So I was guided to a great extent by Jeanine and by George Wolfe . But there was a lot that I had to learn about how to construct a moment with music. Caroline is essentially an opera, it’s through-composed. We were both learning a lot while we were doing it. I’m working with Jeanine now on a new piece and I’ve already begun things I didn’t know. In some ways Caroline was easier than most of the plays that I’ve done because it was so much more collaborative. Once I had written a libretto in the first draft I began to work with Jeanine very closely; I wrote the words, she wrote the music with much overlap. We went through every word and every note very thoroughly. I had to learn a very different tempo in terms of how to do re-writes because if you’re doing a musical and you exchange a line, that changes any of the music. And in previews you’re dealing with giant and very cumbersome machinery, and orchestrations. The singers have to learn the music which is a very different process than just learning a new line so it was complicated. MJR: The musical spurred quite a reaction here at Chicago’s Court Theatre. Have audiences received the show differently in varying parts of the country? TK: I actually haven’t seen it in the South yet. It’s been done in a few places including Lake Charles. Everywhere that it’s been done it’s been very successful, people have responded with great enthusiasm. It was a big hit in London, it won the Olivier award. It’s done very well everywhere. Certainly there are times when it’s felt very different. Jeanine and I came out to see it in Chicago right before the election, right down the street from the Obama house. That was certainly a different kind of feeling, kind of an electric and exciting feeling to be let into the Court in the anticipation of the election. Last spring when it was at the Guthrie it was interesting to see the play post-Obama. Obviously the line when Noah says Caroline is the President of the United States meant one thing 45 years ago. Now when there actually is an African American president in the United States it has a slightly different quality. That’s true for most plays today; the surrounding context changes in locale and time, and they become different.

MJR: HBO has been showing Angels in America for the past month. That dramatic sequence was groundbreaking for several communities. How do you think LGBT issues have shaped theatre in the past two decades, and how has theatre informed the community? TK: Well I don’t think my play . I think that one could say that with Larry Kramer’s The Normal Heart. It coincided with relating to the AIDS epidemic for our community. Angels in America came around later. I have no idea what Angels did or didn’t accomplish beyond the fact that it’s a good play. And that’s the most I ever hoped for. The question of the relationship between LGBT politics and theatre is an interesting one. Obviously an enormous number of people who work in theatre are from the sexual minority area and community. I think there’s a reason for that. It’s where we’ve been contributing to theatre in percentages disproportionate to our percentage in the normal population. And I think that on one hand it’s the case that communities of the oppressed very often find a home in the theatre because people who are oppressed learn the difference between what something seems to be and what it actually is; irony, which is an important ingredient in the theatre, the shaking of reality- these are all things that are part of the everyday life of everyone who has a lived experience of oppression. So I think it makes sense that we would be found in greater numbers in the theatre. Theatre is always very quick to respond to moments of social crisis because it doesn’t take any money or particular organization of capital to make a play. You just find a good writer, actors, director, and a theatre willing to do it and you can put together a play about any subject fairly quickly, certainly much more quickly than you can with most instances of film or television. Theatre is always a good quick response. It is also the place that we go to in order to grapple with social issues of real moment. If you allow Angels to be anything other than a good play, it allowed for a moment in the early 90s at the end of the first chapter to provide a public place for mourning the people who had died in the phase of the epidemic. It was also way of celebrating the end of the Reagan era; there was a great deal of release when Clinton beat the first Bush. We thought, however incorrectly, that we had closed the door on the nightmare of Reaganism which was a pernicious ideology that appeared at the same time as the AIDS virus. So I think that the play was about those things, connected to those things, and provided a public opportunity. MJR: You just finished wrapping up a new screenplay on both the life and work of Abraham Lincoln for Steven Spielberg. What provokes your interest in this particular era of our nation’s history? TK: I worked on for the last three years. We’re working on moving it into the next phase. It’s the time period where every tension and every unresolved conflict in American history prior to the Civil War came to a boil, and eventual explosion. Everything that this country is struggling to become emerges from the crucible of the Civil War. I think Abraham Lincoln, in my opinion, is inarguably our greatest president and one of the greatest people that ever lived- just a completely remarkable figure. I am tremendously interested in him and in his era. MJR: Your stage works are inherently both dialogic and dialectic in form. What keeps your interest in film as a narrative medium, especially since it is often one that focuses on the monologic story? TK: I think film is an extraordinary medium. Many great works of art in the 20th century were created by filmmakers. I feel that’s it’s more narrative driven than theatre, it’s certainly more all-encompassing kind of illusion. I think it doesn’t play as much as theatre does with questions of illusion and reality. To a certain extent I feel as though film is a degree more isolating, it’s perhaps less of a communal experience, though certainly the thing that all the audience’s attention is focused on does not respond to what the audience is telling it. It’s the same from one showing to the next. Obviously there are some stories that cannot be told onstage that can be told on film, there’s just a mathematical question of how many individuals can be reached by a film or television show as opposed to theatre. For me there’s a certain pleasure in surrendering the absolute authority; a playwright in the theatre has, if nothing else, the authority that comes from property ownership. I own the play, I rent the play to the producers, directors, and actors to perform, but it’s mine. When people get together to do a play one of the only common grounds they have to stand is the script. In film, it’s much more the director. The playwright doesn’t own his or her own words. It’s interesting to me and in some ways enjoyable to hand that authority over to somebody else and to be one person among a number who is working to create this final product, but not the person who finally has the decisive say in what it’s going to be. I’ve gotten to work with a few artists I admire enormously Steven Spielberg, Mike Nichols…that’s been thrilling. I got to watch both of them make a movie and I’ve learned a lot from doing that. MJR: You’ve noted before your concern of reducing characters, specifically individuals like Lincoln, into dramatic figures. Do you employ a different approach in humanizing characters for the stage as opposed to a screen medium? TK: Hamlet is a dramatic character, but there’s no reduction in Hamlet. I could think of a dozen film characters as rich as any human being could be. Lincoln is a genius on the level of Mozart or Shakespeare and it’s very difficult and possibly impossible for someone who isn’t a genius to come to any kind of understanding of how Lincoln did what he did. I think that it’s probably impossible for us to know those things. To try and create a dramatic device that is going to deliver the secret of Lincoln’s inner genius or the secret of how Mozart wrote the Requiem or how Shakespeare wrote Hamlet is kind of nonsense. You can’t do that. These are leaps of the human imagination that are so vast and so extraordinary, and rare, that they’re really in a certain sense immeasurable and incomprehensible. What we have is the consequence which is somewhat immeasurable and incomprehensible. There is no one who will ever say everything there is to say about Hamlet, it’s infinite as much as any human creation can be called infinite. I don’t feel that there is any necessary for dumbing down or reducing my ambition as a playwright because I am writing a screenplay. I feel that I can write characters that are just as rich onscreen as they are onstage. There are certain requirements that the forms have that are very different; language is different, the way you construct a character for a script that hopefully many different people will use or perform is different than when you’re writing a script for a director for one movie. So you have a sense that what you are doing is much more for a specific moment.

Tony Kushner, Jeanine Tesori at Court Theatre's CAROLINE OR CHANGE. MJR: Tell us about your process of developing a new work for stage production. TK: I don’t feel that I ever get inspired to do anything. Various impulses come at me during the course of a day just as they came at anybody. I read stories or I remember things that I’ve seen that seem of interest to me because I’m a playwright, that’s my job. I take note of those things and I write them down. If something that I’ve seen or been intrigued by sticks around, I’ll start to wonder if there is something in it that might become a play. If I feel clearer and clearer about why it’s interesting to me- whether it be a person, image, or event in history- I’ll start to keep a separate notebook about it and start to think of what could come as the basis of a play. You mull over five or six things at a time and for one reason or another one of them will the surface. MJR: Do you often find yourself become reclusive during this process? TK: I certainly try to . You should. It’s a good idea to do that. It’s always a mistake to not make that kind of time, but it’s one of the hard things about being a playwright. Part of our time is spent in rooms with a lot of people. Isolation is hard for everybody but for some people it’s easier. If you can’t handle isolation you certainly should not be a novelist or a poet. Playwrights I think in general have a tricky balancing act to do between providing material for the excitement and electricity and sexual heat of a rehearsal room-also the fun and terror of being in the theatre with an audience- and being alone in a room. When I’m really deep in the first draft of a play or screenplay I become slightly antisocial. It’s very hard to talk to people, to be out in the world. I think that everybody who writes experiences this to some extent. You have to kind of smooth your skin away and become available to becoming other people, so you lower boundaries and you remove skin and you make yourself slightly less well-organized than you are in everyday life. It’s hard to go out in public that way. I think it’s easier if you can get the play done in the first draft and then resume your public life; otherwise I think you feel sort of unpresentable and you probably are . Read the full article

#FeaturedInterview

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dustydahlin · 5 years ago

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Living the Raised Life - The Same Power that Rose Jesus from the Dead

If the same power that rose Jesus from the dead lives in me, how do I live according to that power?!

"the Spirit of him who raised Jesus from the dead dwells in you, he who raised Christ Jesus from the dead will also give life to your mortal bodies through his Spirit who dwells in you" (Rom. 8:11).

Today, I will be discussing what it means to live according to the resurrection power of God. I am going to attempt to provide 3 very practical answers to this question from Colossians 3:1-4.

There are many important theological precepts tied to Jesus’ resurrection. For example, Roman 1: 3-4 states, “concerning his Son, who was descended from David according to the flesh and was declared to be the Son of God in power according to the Spirit of holiness by his resurrection from the dead, Jesus Christ our Lord” (ESV). This is hugely important. This demonstrates the all-surpassing necessity of the Messiah’s resurrection. First, this shows us that Jesus was declared to be the Son of God by the resurrection. Up to this point in history, there had been a number of people who claimed to be the Messiah (Josephus). But the claims of these false-christs were silenced by their death. There was only one man who claimed to be Messiah, who actually fulfilled all the prophecies and rose from the dead. Only One. Just Jesus. The Resurrection declared God’s approval of Jesus’s identity, His atoning work and sacrifice, and the undying love of God for man!

The resurrection not only declared/communicated God’s approval of Jesus, it was necessary for the perfect fulfillment of Scripture. In the ESV, this is the only time this Greek word (ὁρίζω - horizō) is translated “declared.” All other times, it is used of something (or someone) being appointed or determined.

The resurrection was an essential appointment in Jesus’ life and ministry. Jesus was appointed, before the foundation of the earth was laid, to die a substitutionary death and rise from the dead. God’s plan for salvation was to present humankind a Savior who was both their perfect Atoning Sacrifice and their Immortal King! A Lamb and a Lion. God and man. A servant and a King. A prophet and a priest. Humble and Exalted. Jesus was appointed to both suffer death and defeat it! God promised to cure the sickness of sin through the suffering and death of Messiah (Isaiah 53), and God promised an immortal King through the lineage of David (2 Sam. 7:12-13). One who would rule and reign over God’s people forever. The resurrection was so imperative because it proved Jesus’ immortality and His Divinity. It proved the Kingdom of God had been established, and it was He who sat on the throne.

It is theologically significant in many other ways, also. Today, however, I really want to discuss the practical implications of the Resurrection of Jesus. Specifically, I want to attempt to answer the question, “how do I live my life in accordance with the resurrection power, of the Holy Spirit, within me?!” My goal, this Easter, is to move the information about the power of Christ’s resurrection from the head to the heart.

Relationship (Col. 3:1, “...seek...”)

The short list is this: 1 Peter 1:3, Phil. 3:10, Rom. 6:5, 1 Cor. 15:19-20, Col. 2:12, Col. 3:1-4, 2 Cor. 4:10-11, etc. I encourage you to look them up on your own. What the Bible instructs us through these passages is to identify with the Power of Christ’s resurrection. And not simply identify, we are to live according to what we have been given – the same life-giving power that rose Jesus from the dead. Entire Passages. Entire songs. Entire sermons. Entire devotionals. Entire blog-posts have dedicated to this precious reality.

From the symbolism of water baptism, which connects the soul to the life-giving work of Jesus. Baptism is a visual sermon about the power of Christ to raise those who were spiritually dead. “having been buried with him in baptism, in which you were also raised with him through faith in the powerful working of God, who raised him from the dead” (Col. 2:12). It is the very image of our Savior’s death and resurrection, as well as a pictorial reminder of the power of God to save and to raise.

To the experiential Covenant relationship of Yahweh with His people. Paul states we are to “know Him and the power of His resurrection” (Phil. 3:10). It is supposed to go beyond simply watching YouTube videos, to actually interacting with the Person, the ministry, and the comfort of the Holy Spirit (2 Cor. 13:14). We are not only to understand that the fullness of God dwells within us by the Person of the Holy Spirit, but we are to actively SEEK Him and we are to earnestly SERVE Him. Col. 1:9-10 declares, “... we have not ceased to pray for you, asking that you may be filled with the knowledge of his will in all spiritual wisdom and understanding, so as to walk in a manner worthy of the Lord, fully pleasing to him: bearing fruit in every good work and increasing in the knowledge of God.” We have entered a highly experiential relationship with God. And it is defined and characterized by the Power of Christ’s resurrection, which was exerted over us and given to us.

It is clear. The Bible did not misrepresent the Heart of God. But the question still remains, “How do I live the raised life? How do I walk according to the resurrection power of God?” The answer is going to surprise you. You can find the answer in Colossians 3:1-4. It begins with Savior Seeking. I mean... How can one know what it means to live the raised life – living by the resurrection power of the Spirit – without looking to the One who raises the Dead?!

On this topic, Colossians 3 opens with the answer of seeking (ζητεῖτε) and setting (φρονεῖτε). “If then you have been raised with Christ, seek the things that are above, where Christ is, seated at the right hand of God. Set your minds on things that are above, not on things that are on earth. For you have died, and your life is hidden with Christ in God. When Christ who is your life appears, then you also will appear with him in glory” (1-4). It begins with setting your mind on the things of God and continuously, regularly, undyingly, zealously, seeking the Lord and His help. The way these words are constructed in the Greek intensify this instruction. Both set and seek are parsed as Present Imperative Active verbs. This means “Continually, habitually follow this command! The Present Imperative is often a call to a long-term commitment and calls for the attitude or action to be one's continual way of life (lifestyle)” (Precept Austin).

The first directive to living the raised life, is to set the motivations of your mind and heart on regularly, actively, daily seeking the risen King. This Passage offers step one of living according to the same power that rose Jesus from the dead. It is to set your mind on seeking our Lord.

So what does this mean? Simply and practically, it means creating time for the Lord every day. It is so imperative to develop habits of grace. It is setting aside time for prayer, fasting, worship/service, meditation, reading the Bible, and practicing thankfulness. Making the intentional and conscious efforts to regularly seek the Lord will be the very efforts by which the soul will soar to the heights of relationship with God and experience the resurrection power of Christ. This is so important. This how one can begin to position themselves to live the raised life!

“I know of no better thermometer to your spiritual temperature than this, the measure of the intensity of your prayer” (Spurgeon).

"I am a spiritual being... After this body is dead, my spirit will soar. I refuse to let what will rot rule the eternal. I choose self-control. I will be drunk only by joy. I will be impassioned only by my faith. I will be influenced only by God. I will be taught only by Christ" (Max Lucado).

"Yours will be the wings of an eagle's flight, the soaring of a lark, sunward, heavenward, Godward! But you must take time to be holy - in meditation, in prayer, and especially in the use of the Bible" (F.B. Meyer).

There is, however, another answer to the question of “how do I walk according to the same power that rose Jesus from the dead?”

Rising Above! (Vs. 3, “… you died… hidden…”)

Our Passage brings us to another point. A surprising point! A VERY surprising point!!!

As a good American, I have always been compelled to interpret the answer of living the raised live – living in accordance with the resurrection power within us, by the Holy Spirit – through the Lens of postmodernity. I have ALWAYS thought that living the raised life means rising above discomfort. Rising above dysfunction. Rising above sorrow. I thought it meant to rise up and out of pain. I thought the raised life meant learning to arise and escape suffering. I assumed, because I am a good western-minded American, it meant rising above tribulation and affliction to the zenith of soaring to the heights of comfort.

I was wrong. Did you see it in the Text?! Look at what it says in verse three. It says to live the raised life, you need to live a lowered life. “For you have died, and your life is hidden with Christ in God” (3). Whoah! It brings death into scope. It brings the sacrifice of Christ’s death into the equation. This is reminding us, using the symbolism of baptism, to follow the example of Jesus. In the same way Jesus died to Himself. In the same way Jesus lived a life of self-sacrifice and giving. In the same way Jesus gave everything for His heavenly purpose. In the same way Jesus could not resurrect without first dying. Living the raised life, by the power of the Holy Spirit, means following the example of Jesus. It means dying to self. Living the raised life means living a life of self-giving. It means dying to self. Living a raised life means lowering yourself into the shadow of Jesus’ cross. Hiding yourself in the exultation of Christ’s resurrection.

This is not the only Scripture that offers dying to self as the main principle behind living under the resurrection power of our Lord. There are SO many.

Phil. 3:10, “that I may know him and the power of his resurrection, and may share his sufferings, becoming like him in his death.”

Rom. 6:1-5, “What shall we say then? Are we to continue in sin that grace may abound? By no means! How can we who died to sin still live in it? Do you not know that all of us who have been baptized into Christ Jesus were baptized into his death? We were buried therefore with him by baptism into death, in order that, just as Christ was raised from the dead by the glory of the Father, we too might walk in newness of life. For if we have been united with him in a death like his, we shall certainly be united with him in a resurrection like his.”

Eph. 5:1-2, “Therefore be imitators of God, as beloved children. And walk in love, as Christ loved us and gave himself up for us, a fragrant offering and sacrifice to God.”

“I have now concentrated all my prayers into one, and that one prayer is this, that I may die to self, and live wholly to Him” (Spurgeon).

Living the Raised life means living the lowered life. It means dying to yourself, and sacrificing for the sake of others. This is where the resurrection life of Christ can really be seen through us. Sacrificially loving your wife. Dying to yourself means setting aside time for seeking our risen Lord. Joyfully giving of your tithes and offerings for the sake of those who labor over you, and for the advancing of the Kingdom. Spending less time on Instagram, and more time serving the body of Christ. Feeding the homeless. Going out of the way to build a relationship with your neighbors. Inviting a co-worker over for dinner. Secretly going over to your stressed-out pastor’s house to selflessly help his little family with yard-work while he is out of town. Secretly… Without promise or hope of recognition… Secretly leaving gifts for the underprivileged children next door. Digging wells in Africa. Sharing your faith with your aunt. Striving for excellence in your day job, while your boss is NOT looking. Telling your co-worker about the hope you have in Jesus. Inviting a friend to church. Going back to church yourself. Replacing your habit of complaint with a lifestyle of thankfulness.

A Rising Hope! (vs. 4, “… When Christ Appears…”)

Living the raised life also means lifting the goblet of expectation to be filled with waters of hope. While it is truly a joyous and treasured reality to experience the newness of spiritual life, now, we can cling to the sure hope of our Savior’s return. When Christ comes for His church, he will come with even greater blessing and promise. There will be resurrection. There will be no more sorrow. There will be no more suffering. There will be no more death. We earn. Our hearts long. Our minds anticipate. Our bodies rejoice. We can allow the sure promise of the blessed hope of Christ to heal, purify, and motivate us. While living the raised life means lowering our earthly-selves into Christ’s tomb, it means raising our hope to the heights of anticipation.

Col. 3:4, “When Christ who is your life appears, then you also will appear with Him in glory.” My favorite part of this Scripture is not the promise of the “appearing.” It is not even necessarily the watching the sky roll up like a scroll. While all of these things tantalize the heart and intoxicate the soul. My favorite part of this promise is the “with Him.” We can look to an eternity in perfection and glory WITH JESUS. The patient barer of our iniquities. The image and depiction of a loving God. The proof of relentless Mercy. The Stamp of unending grace. The Giver of life. The Hope of resurrection. The Sustainer of undeserving souls. Our Savior.

1 Cor. 15: 51-55, “Behold! I tell you a mystery. We shall not all sleep, but we shall all be changed, in a moment, in the twinkling of an eye, at the last trumpet. For the trumpet will sound, and the dead will be raised imperishable, and we shall be changed. For this perishable body must put on the imperishable, and this mortal body must put on immortality. When the perishable puts on the imperishable, and the mortal puts on immortality, then shall come to pass the saying that is written: ‘Death is swallowed up in victory. O death, where is your victory? O death, where is your sting?’"

1 Thess. 4:14-18, “For since we believe that Jesus died and rose again, even so, through Jesus, God will bring with him those who have fallen asleep. For this we declare to you by a word from the Lord, that we who are alive, who are left until the coming of the Lord, will not precede those who have fallen asleep. For the Lord himself will descend from heaven with a cry of command, with the voice of an archangel, and with the sound of the trumpet of God. And the dead in Christ will rise first. Then we who are alive, who are left, will be caught up together with them in the clouds to meet the Lord in the air, and so we will always be with the Lord. Therefore encourage one another with these words.”

There is only one hope. It is that the work of Christ was confirmed by His own resurrection. He rose from the grave. The resurrection was heaven’s declaration of victory. With His resurrection, He celebrated the reward of a valiant conqueror. There is only one hope. It is the joy of experiencing newness of life. It is the hope and promise of experiencing the full glory of perfection at the Christ’s return. It is a hope your heart can be refreshed by. It is an expectation your mind can ceaselessly meditate upon. It is a hope you can have NOW. It is yours if you are to place your faith in Jesus. By the power of the Spirit who rose Messiah from the dead, you can be lifted out of the mire to walk beside Jesus – like Jesus. Both now and at the consummation of all things.

“Our sorrows are all, like ourselves, mortal. There are no immortal sorrows for immortal souls. They come, but blessed be God, they also go. Like birds of the air, they fly over our heads. But they cannot make their abode in our souls. We suffer today, but we shall rejoice tomorrow” (Spurgeon).

The answer: living the raised life, by the power of Christ’s resurrection, is to desperately seek God every day, die to yourself for the benefit of others, and allow the Hope of Christ’s return and our further bodily resurrection tantalize our expectations.

Additional Recommendations:

God's Empowering Presence: The Holy Spirit in the Letters of Paul

Paul, the Spirit, and the People of God

Gospel of the Kingdom: Scriptural Studies in the Kingdom of God

The Last Things: An Eschatology for Laymen

Militant Thankfulness: An Essential Practice to Experiencing a Full Spiritual Life

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johnchiarello · 6 years ago

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Mark 7

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CCOUTREACH87

⋅ APRIL 16, 2017 ⋅