#i am just naturally more attached to their older music

[giggly-squiggily]

Fiesty (Blue Lock)

Heyo everyone! It's come to my attention that despite loving these boys very much, I have yet to write anything with Kunigami and Isagi. I am ashamed, and shall repent by bringing you this fic of the boys being dorks together :D I hope you like it!

Cloud 9 (Taglist Peeps):

@myreygn @cupcake-spice13 @chibsstuff @imjusthere07 @riisada @ticklish-n-stuff @intheticklecloset (I know y'all aren't on my Taglist but like-blue lock! :D)

“Whoops, my bad!” Kunigami called out as his shirt flew, landing on Isagi’s face.

Normally Isagi would brush it off with a “It’s cool, man” or something to that nature, maybe even bring it back to the self-proclaimed hero.

Today though: today he was feeling a bit feisty. So much so he balled up Kunigami’s shirt and slugged it as hard as he could towards the back of his head.

The effect was anticlimactic. The shirt unfurled halfway there. What was supposed to be a satisfying whack turned into it haphazardly landing on Kunigami’s own face, briefly blinding him.

Silence. The two boys just kinda sat there as they let what just happened sink in. Slowly, Kunigami pulled it off, turning to look at Isagi with raised brows. The brunette stiffened- an apology on his lips.

Then that feistiness came back and he opted to square his shoulders, raising his chin with a mild glare. No words though- just a glare. The silence stretched.

“...Do you wanna fight?” Kunigami blinked- his tone lacking any anger despite the words. If anything, he sounded more amused. Isagi felt his temper flair some as he glared harder- hoping the shape of his mouth was a tight lipped frown and not a pout. “Is that what we’re doing right now?”

“Y-Yeah! We’re fighting!” Isagi finally spoke, puffing up. “Let’s go, you and me! Right here, right now!”

Kunigami stared at him, unreadable. Then he grinned, standing up and rolling out his arms. “Alright. A fight it is.”

Isagi pulled up further, readying himself. It was also at this moment he realized he had no idea how to fight. He had never been in one before- he’d only seen the kids at his school get into them, and even then he stayed out of it.

Kunigami closed the gap while he realized this, and after looking into the ginger’s eyes, he realized this wasn’t the kind of fight he expected at all.

“Wait- wait I take it back! I take it ba-ahhahaack!” Isagi went to run, but Kunigami had him by the collar, pulling him into his chest. Seconds later, fingers were flying up and down his sides, making him yelp and kick. “Kuhuhuuhuhunighahahahahahmi!”

“Come on, Isagi- you don’t run from a fight you initiated!” The older boy chided gently, pulling up an arm with one hand and pinching up his ribs with the other. “That makes you look weak! When you challenge someone to a fight, you have to be prepared to go all out!”

“Buhuhuhut I dohohohon’t wahhahahanahaha fiihihihght no mohohohore!” Isagi cried through his giggles, clawing at the hand stubbornly attached to his mid-set ribs. “Iihihihih’m ahahahhall abohohohout thahahaht phahahahahcefihihihist lihihihife nohohohw!”

“Pfft- yeah, says the guy who’s not afraid to get physical on the soccer field.” Kunigami laughed good naturedly, daring to drop a hand to Isagi’s lower ribs just to hear him scream. “Where’s all that edge? That fiest? That zest of life you had five minutes ago?”

“Whahahaht the hehehehehell ahahahre yhohohohou gohohohoing on abohohohout?” Isagi snorted through his laughter, legs growing weak with each squeeze to that terrible spot. He tried to rip himself away, but a quick tug and sweep left him flat on his ass, trapped within a leg grip as Kunigami dug into his belly. “AHehahahahahahah noohoohohoho!”

“Eh, a bunch of words I heard Gagamaru say when describing dumplings. I think their lyrics to a song? You know his odd taste in music.” The hero snickered as he dug both hands in, leaving no spot on Isagi’s belly untouched as the brunette writhed about. “Hey, you’re always humming those silly anime tunes of yours- why not sing me something? Anything! Then I’ll let you win this fight.”

“LIHIHIHKE HEHEHHELL! GEHAHHAHAHHA!” Isagi all but howled at the tickles, cheeks on fire and starting to hurt from how much he was smiling. “I CHAHAHAN’T SIIIHHING FOR SHIHIHIHIHIIHIHI-EHEHEHE!”

“Who can? Well- he can.” Kunigami hummed as he moved his hands to Isagi’s armpits, making him nearly croak from silent mirth. “Well, I guess I can count this squawking of yours as music. It’s a new version of screamo, yeah?” He finally let him be, pulling his hands back and gently patting Isagi between the shoulderblades as Isagi gasped for air. “There- still want to fight?”

“Gehahah…ahahah…yohoohu’re an ahahaass.” Isagi groaned, jerking with a giggle when Kunigami pinched his sides. “Yoohohu started it- the whole fight thing!”

“I did? Oh- wait, yeah I did.” Kunigami released him fully, pulling back as Isagi turned to face him. “Sorry- I didn’t know anyone else was in the room. I should be more mindful.”

“Pfft- it’s fine, really. I don’t know what got into me.” Isagi smiled, lightly kicking him in the shin. “I threw it back pretty hard, so I’m no better.”

“That was hard?” Kunigami asked- followed quickly with them saying in unison “That’s what she said”. Isagi cackled, delighted, and Kunigami wheezed. Laughing like children on the locker room floor, they carried on changing into sweats before making their way to the main room, still laughing.

“What’s got you so giggly?” Chigiri asked, unable to fight off a grin as Kunigami sat beside him. “Bit by the tickle bug or something?”

Isagi blushed a few feet away as Kunigami laughed more. Shaking his head, he turned to Bachira- finding the other curled up half asleep against both his and Isagi’s futons. “Scoot over some.”

“Cuddles if I do?” Bachira pouted up at him, sprawling out further. Isagi snorted, nodding as he gently moved him, fitting perfectly into Bachira’s arms.

“Always.”

Thanks for reading!

[anki-of-beleriand]

In the darkness you said goodbye

Summary: Wanda makes a mistake, and she thinks she can tlak herself out of it.

Warnings: Cheating, F/M sex, bittersweet ending, Wanda is to blame.

Pairing: Reader/Wanda - Reader/Carol - Wanda/Vision

Author's note: This story is an experiment, mostly I want to see how it goes as a one shot, and second just want to see how it goes with Wanda. I hope you guys liked it, as always English is not my mother tongue so forgive me my grammar, spelling and funny mistakes.

Second part: In the light you love her

 Winter was your favourite time of the year.

The snowflakes falling on the ground, and the sound of Christmas jingles around the streets was enough to put you on a good mood. It had been five years since Thanos was defeated it and the Blip was reversed changing the shape of the universe, the stories people told were now shaped for a past that defied everything they knew.

Midgard had certainly changed in the last years; new heroes were born and the old ones were ready to step aside and give way to the new generations. Your face lifted up to the Avengers Tower standing proudly in midtown Manhattan while the cold of the early afternoon surrounded you in a comforting embrace.

You smiled to yourself, music blasting through your ears while your hand closed around the small box you had worked your ass off to get for this special date. Your phone vibrated, the ringtone you attached to Natasha’s name breaking through the music and you couldn’t help but roll your eyes at the sudden interruption.

“Yes, mom?” The voice at the other end chuckled, and you allowed yourself a tender smile.

“I’m just making sure you’re okay, kiddo, no need to be a brat about it.”

“I am okay, more than okay, I’m super okay!”

“So, you’re nervous.” The older woman replied, and you gulped chewing on your lower lip.

“I am, I’m super nervous.” You confessed, the hand closing around the small box as you spoke. “Tasha, I love her, I…god when I lost her in the Blip, I almost lost myself to darkness…”

“I remember, Y/N, I know it was hard for you.” And Natasha remembered those dark times, you had always been an open gate to darkness.

The very nature of your species made it easier for your heart and soul to give into darkness, your powers were not only a manifestation of your mutation but also a warning sign of what you were capable of doing. But Natasha never gave up on you, and from the moment Thor brought you in and she took care of you, you became the woman Natasha knew you could be. Then, Thanos happened and Natasha could see for the very first-time what Thor and even Loki meant when they said that you were born out of pure blackness. You became unfeeling, careless, cold and almost cruel…

The moment you lost Wanda, on that battlefield watching her disappeared, that was the first time Natasha feared you.

You turned around destroying every single servant that Thanos had brought with him, your shadows covering Wakanda just before they perished in screams of pure agony. Darkness had covered you, and everything would have ended in disaster if Steve hadn’t knock you out; not many understood the deepness of your love for Wanda, but Natasha had been there to see the growing friendship, the affection and the tender moments stolen in between their teenage years.

Natasha had seen the relationship grow from afar, and she could tell you were far to in love with Wanda to not suffer with her lost. But even after you woke up, it wouldn’t be until everyone went looking for Thanos in space that you really broke.

Natasha still remembered when you crumbled to your feet after having destroyed an entire fleet of Chitahuri while looking for Thanos with Carol. How you cried until she put her arms around you, and you finally let go of the pain of losing the woman you loved with all your heart and might. You cried for days, and soon every surviving Avenger was afraid of losing you, of not being able to reach out to you. Natasha hated to see the suffering in your face, the whimpers leaving your lips as you tried to talk and explain that you were hurting so badly you didn’t know what to do.

It took time, but eventually you started recovering. Tony and Steve, as well as Carol and Rocket helped in the process. From them you learnt about your past, and your planet, they talked to you about your origins and your powers, and Natasha was happy to see you recover.

You became not only an Avenger, but also an amazing woman.

And now, after five years of having defeated Thanos and recovering the woman you had been in love since you were fifteen years old, it was just fair for you to have a happy ending.

“You have grown so much since I first met you, Y/N. Wanda is a lucky girl, you know?”

“Nah, I’m the lucky one, I just hope…I mean…” You stood by the gates of the Tower, trembling while cleaning up your sweaty hands. “We’ve been talking about having children and all, and I just… I don’t know if I’m a mom material but…”

“You are. You are, Y/N, now stop stalling and go get her, kiddo. I love you.” Natasha stated in that motherly tone you had come to love as well, you chuckled when you heard Yelena in the background and Natasha cursing in Russian.

“Okay, okay, don’t kill auntie Lena, and stop cursing. I call you when …. when I can.”

“Please have loud, sweaty sex with your soon to be fiancée, and call us when you finish!”

“Yelena!”

You chuckled shaking your head while hanging up.

The building was mostly empty, there was only one security guard that greet you with a polite smile and a mug of hot chocolate on his hands. You went past him into the elevators, your finger selecting the floor Tony had given to Wanda when he first finished the Avengers Tower.

You stood there hearing the music, your hands completely sweaty while your heart hammered hard against your chest. There was a deep void inside your stomach, and you couldn’t help but lifted your eyes to the numbers on the screen. You knew that day would be the day, today had been your last active day as a hero, and Tony had already hired you as normal everyday scientist in one of his investigational facilities. Wanda still thought you were in Kamar Taj with Strange and a girl that had shown to his doorstep, so tonight would be a great surprised that you hope would finally give you your happily ever after.

When Wanda came back, trying to build your relationship with her had been hard.

Wanda found it difficult to adapt herself to a life she was not used to, she found it hard to find out you had travelled around the galaxy being a hero with someone like Carol Danvers and Rocket. At first, you found it funny that Wanda was jealous of Carol, but then it was not only Carol but also your new house in Westview, or the bicycle you bought to go around the city. It was about your job at Stark’s Industries and your lack of interested in being a hero. Then it was you leaving your hero life behind and wanting to be normal, or to gather the new generation of heroes…

Your relationship with Wanda had been rocky, to say the last, after she came back.

But you had learnt that time and communication fixed everything, and after a while the both of you talked about what you really wanted. About your future, about your hopes…and you realized that Wanda wanted nothing more than a life with you. To build a family, and to be happy. She was finding it hard to do so, in a world that had moved on without her, and you made sure to let her know every day that your life had been nothing without her in it.

You smiled putting the ring from your pocket.

Now, finally you could close the last gap and asked Wanda to marry you. You had given up everything in your old life, to start your new life with Wanda.

“Okay, here we go…”

The door of the elevator open and you stepped inside the living room. The place was decorated with candles, and the sweet aroma of Wanda’s favourite perfume. You furrowed your brows, looking around the place you could see her back, and some of her things scattered around.

You walked down the halls, stopping dead on your tracks when your eyes fell upon something you did not recognize. It was a dark jacket. You looked around the scene, and then you caught the sounds. You felt dizzy, your body burning while your stomach dropped leaving a foul taste in your throat.

The hallway was dark, most of the doors were closed but the last one at the end of the hallway. Yellowish light came from it, and as you approached it you could tell it was the light coming from different candles. You were trembling, all of a sudden you felt cold and empty.

A heavy weight positioned above your shoulders, and your heart trembled at the sight before you.

Wanda was on the bed, sprawled and legs wide open with Vision on top of her. Both were naked, and Wanda was throwing her head back grabbing the bedsheets tightly, Vision was trusting inside her whispering in her ear.

Your eyesight blurred for a moment, but your presence went unnoticed and just as you came in, you left. You were staggering around the hallway until your knees gave up and you fell with a soft thud, tears rolling down your eyes and the ring you had made for Wanda fell to the floor.

A part of you, the darker part, ignited a fire inside you ready to scream and bring down the hole building with Wanda and Vision in it. You wanted to make them suffered, for them to experiment the sheer pain you were experimenting at the moment. But another part, the one you had gained with your family and friends simply told you to go.

And so, you did. Falling into the shadows you disappeared leaving behind the ring you had made to Wanda as promised to her, a commitment, and show of your love for her.

Later that same night, Wanda cringed shivering as she exited her room. She placed a hand on her face, shamed and self-disgust filling up her mind, just as she thought of the passion that Vision ignited in her. She knew she needed to put a stop to the affair with Vision; she knew that she had to do it soon if she really wanted to move forward with Y/N and actually started the family you two had talked about. But Wanda was afraid to do so, she was afraid of the consequences, of Vision not understanding, of anyone finding out…

Wanda was strolling down the hallway until her feet stepped on something hard on the floor. She furrowed her brows, and her expression soon changed as she realized it was a small box. At first she thought this was one of Vision’s attempts to get to her heart, but then Wanda felt her stomach dropped and her heart ached painfully in her chest.

Inside the box there was a ring.

And suddenly, Wanda realized how stupid she had been.

Wanda stood there, her eyes wide open filled with tears. She made her way to the door, but you were no longer there, the room was still dark and when she turned on the lights her gazed fell upon the dark box you had been carrying for almost five years.

“Wanda…” Vision said behind her, but Wanda couldn’t do or say anything at all, her eyes completely fixed on the ring you had brought to her.

It was a start.

A green start resembling a spiralling galaxy, the shank of the ring made of white gold.

Your name and hers written around it, the date you two said I love you to one another right beside them.

It was at moment that Wanda realized how stupid she had been.

_________________________________________

“You really have some nerve to come here, Wanda.” Natasha stood by the door glaring at the redhead, her arms crossed though she could sense Yelena getting her weapons ready.

“Natasha, I need to talk to her.” Wanda was on the verge of desperation.

For more than a month she had tried to reach out to you, to try and get to talk to you and explain herself. Wanda knew that whatever you had seen, whatever had happened, she would need to do more than explain what had happened. Why she did it. You were nowhere to be found, and everyone had closed their doors to Wanda who only got disgusted faces, and harsh words thrown at her.

She knew she was risking a lot by coming here, but it was her last chance.

“She doesn’t want to talk to you.” Natasha stated, her eyes glaring at Wanda. “Now, if you excuse me…”

“Natasha, please…” Wanda all but begged, she had tears in her eyes and it was quite evident she had not sleep in quite a while.

Natasha hesitated; she wondered if Wanda understood the gravity of her sin.

The former Black Widow almost went to the Tower to kill with her bare hands the red head. Y/N had come home, a scream of pure pain leaving her lips just as tears rolled down her cheeks. It took Natasha almost an hour to get Y/N to tell her what had happened, and she was so heartbroken she curled up on her bed and cried while holding a hand to her chest.

No one knew the reality of a broken heart.

How much it hurt, how it made your body cold and ached as if a thousand knives went through your every nerve. Y/N spent three days on her bed, ignoring everyone and everything around her. For a brief moment, Natasha had been afraid of the darkness growing in your eyes, day in and out seeing it covered your iris and expanding little by little.

“You broke her heart, Wanda.” Natasha stated through gritted teeth. “You broke her, and she loved you more than life itself. I can’t tell you just how much she loved you and how much you messed up…”

“I know! I know! I know!” Wanda screamed putting a hand on her face. “I know screwed up! I KNOW!”

Natasha seemed unfazed by the outburst, and Wanda broke in front of the former Widow pleading with her eyes.

“Please, I just need…”

“She is not here.” Natasha finally said.

“What?” Wanda winked confusedly; Natasha hesitated before speaking.

“She left two days ago.”

“Where? Why?” Wanda panicked, she glanced at Natasha then back at Yelena. “Where is she?”

“She left the planet; Loki came in and took her away.” This time around it was Yelena, the blond-haired woman smirked nastily at Wanda. “And we don’t know when she will be back, perhaps never, and if she is lucky, she may meet someone that won’t break her heart.”

Wanda stood there, lost and crushed by this news. Natasha hesitated for a moment, a part of her feeling this was not the best way to give the news. The woman stepped forward moving past Wanda.

“She is not coming back anytime soon, Wanda, so if I were you I would just let go.” Natasha turned to look at Wanda. “She waited for you, she almost lost herself for you, she was going to marry you…”

“I know! I just…god, this is so mess up!” Wanda wrapped her arms around herself. “I need to…I…I just…I need her…”

“You’re too late for that, Wanda.” Natasha then turned around and left.

Wanda stood there.

She was alone, lost and desperate, and without a single clue as to where you were or how to reach you out. Not a single way to talk to you, to explain to you…Wanda fell to her knees, her hand reaching out for the ring in her pocket. Tears rolling down her cheeks, and her mind a pool of confusing thoughts.

She would wait if it was necessary.

She knew that you were hurt, and she would wait for you to have a chance to explain herself to you.

And then, she would make sure to show you that Wanda was yours. That you held her heart in your hands.

It would be quite a while before she would see you again. But Wanda would wait, just the same way you did.

_________________________________________

Winter was back.

You lifted your eyes to the sky, closing your eyes while enjoying the feeling the cold on your face. Your ears twitched catching the sound of laughter inside the house, turning around you saw Kamala Khan squealing like a fangirl while hugging Carol tightly. You smirked at the sight, Carol was still getting used to such shows ow affection and Kamala was certainly someone without any limitations in her PDA.

“Y/N!! Oh, did you hear?? I will help you guys move!!!” Kamala went back inside her house screaming at the top of her lungs, “AMMI!”

“Move?” You asked raising a single eyebrow, Carol winced making her way to where you were standing.

“Well, I was thinking that perhaps I shouldn’t be moving around so much, and that staying on Earth is not such a bad thing, after all.” Carol shrugged looking away from you, her lip caught in her teeth with her mind filled with thoughts and possibilities.

Overthinking her every step as always.

“I think Monica is going to love it, Kamala is screaming her appreciation…”

“And you?” Carol asked this time around facing you with just a hint of uncertainty in her eyes. “You’re back again, what would you do?”

You had been away for two years, while you never stopped contacting Natasha and the others you had left earth with a single thing in mind. To heal. Your heart had been broken to pieces the moment you found about Wanda’s infidelity, you had cried and cursed and almost turned to darkness until you found yourself at the hands of Carol Danvers. For the second time, the woman took it upon herself to help you out, out of friendship she never thought she would get a chance with you; not after having heard of your story with Wanda and certainly not after she was back. Her odds didn’t improve one bit when she saw how heartbroken you were, Carol knew by then you needed a friend and that was what she offered you.

A friendship that, little by little turned into something else.

Still, there were times in which Carol doubt herself and the relationship she had forged with you.

You softened your featured, your arm wrapping around her waist putting her closer to you. She leaned in, nuzzling your neck before placing a soft kiss on your jaw looking for comfort. You smiled lowering your face until your lips met hers, the kiss was slow and sweet, and Carol smiled into the kiss.

“So, that’s an idea of what you want to do?”

“Ugh, gross.” Monica made a face while Kamala was looking at the scene with a glint of curiosity in her eyes.

“Okay, ladies, nothing to see here.” Carol tried to shush them away, but you wrapped your arms around her again, you turned her around and kissed her once more making Monica gaged and Kamala giggled nervously.

“Let’s give them a show, Danvers.” You mumbled in between kisses; she punched you lightly on the arm flustered stepping away from you before she decided to just follow your lead.

“Very well, I think it is time for me to go back to work but…” Monica turned to Carol wrapping her arms around her. “Please, Auntie Carol, tell me when you get there and don’t forget to keep an eye on the plane.”

“I won’t Captain trouble.” Carol said affectionately, Monica smiled sighing as she stepped back.

“Don’t be a stranger, Rambeau.” You gave her a hug, and the other woman glanced at you then back at Carol.

“You’re one to say, Natasha Romanoff is still waiting for you and you heard Fury…”

You winced fidgeting on your spot, you had heard Fury and Natasha was also waiting for you. You nodded scratching the back of your neck.

“I guess is inevitable.” You shrugged. “I will tell you all the gross details of these meetings.”

“I will wait for them anxiously, take care of Auntie Carol please.”

“I will, don’t worry.” You winked at Monica and stepped back to join Kamala and Carol inside the Khan’s family.

“Hey, are you okay?” Carol fixed your hair behind your ears, you nodded curtly pecking her nose.

“Yeah, let’s eat and then I will take you home, Captain Marvel.”

Earth had changed in the last two years she had been here.

The street were loudly, and the technology had certainly improved a lot. The stories were different now, most of them included the newest heroes in the cities, and the evilness lurking in the shadows.  You enjoyed the soft purr of the bike you had bought in Jersey City, Carol had her arm wrapped around your abdomen leaning against your body while you drove down the streets of a city you had not seen in a long time.

Up until now, you had spent your time in the guest room at the Khan’s family home. You had tried to say no, but Ms. Khan was very adamant that they would not stay in a hotel or something equally dangerous. And Kamala was beyond excited to have them both in her home, at least until all the moving details had been arranged and soon they would be driving down to Luisiana.

To say you were nervous was an understatement, it didn’t mater you had spoken with Natasha almost every day since leaving earth. Or that you had been kept up to date with the gossip around the Avengers and the newest additions thanks to Yelena, it was the fact that this little party would include Wanda as a guest. Two years ago, you had left your home running away from your feelings, your heart had been broken and you never thought it would mend. And while it took some time to get it back together, to actually allow yourself to feel and fall in love again.

You had done so.

Carol had become your world, but this time around you were careful to not lost yourself into the relationship. Carol was not an easy person, and while the road to happiness had been a bumpy one, you wouldn’t change a single thing of how everything happened. Not if it meant that at the end of the day she would wake up with you beside her, a mug filled with coffee and a morning of meaningless talks watching the space in the window of a ship.

“Wow, I don’t remember this building being here on my last visit.” Carol stated getting off the motorcycle, she glanced up to the building then turning to you.

“I bet Tony made some arrangements.” You smiled turning to the main gates, your hand seeking out hers.

“Are you ready?” Carol inquired tilting her head, you nodded curtly and then without wasting any more time, you two entered the building.

There were many familiar faces, but soon you found yourself being wrapped in a tight hug by none other than Natasha. You softened your face and your arms wrapped around her pulling her close to you, Carol watched from a distance, her lisp curling into a gentle smile before she turned around and left for the bar. These moments were for you, and you had been waiting to come back and see the people you love, Carol could understand that much. With a heavy heart, and insecurities filling up her mind, the woman made her way to the bar never noticing the redhead glaring daggers at her back.

“You look so good, Y/N, did you cut your hair?” Natasha put you at arm’s length, her eyes twinkling while the examine you with care.

“Yeah, a little and well I have to be on top physical form to be in space, so…” You smiled sheepishly, Natasha chuckled placing a strand of hair behind your ear.

“How have you been?” Natasha finally asked and you just shrugged.

“Fine, I guess. I just come here due to a mishap of  powers between Carol, Monica and a girl called Kamala.”

“So I heard, quite the adventure I guess.” Natasha then hit you on your arm.

“Hey!”

“So if it hadn’t been because of that you wouldn’t have come?” Natasha was a little hurt by this, you shook your head lowering your gaze before shrugging.

“No, of course not. I did have plans…” You stated and Natasha was about to speak but trailed off just as her eyes caught another person coming towards them. “I knew I have to come back, and I was dying to see you all, I was just… waiting…”

“You were waiting for what?” Wanda asked behind you, and she wait anxiously for you to turn around.

You thought the moment you heard her voice again, that you saw her again your resolution would crumble and that perhaps you would fall under her spell once more. One of your greatest gears included your weakness to perhaps leave behind your relationship with Wanda and moved forward. But this never happened, and soon after you started healing it was easier to move on. Now, after two years, you stood before her and you realized you had been scared for nothing.

Of course, your stomach dropped, your palms started sweating and your head fluttered in your chest when you saw her again. She was still as beautiful as you remembered her, her voice still carried with it such a powerful tinge, something you had always loved from her.

But something else had changed, the shivering in your heat came along with an old pain and rage that went through your senses. You clenched your fists closed, but remained impassive while Wanda offered a tentative smile.

“Hey.”

“Hi.”

Wanda chewed on her lower lip before speaking, “do you think we could talk?”

You glanced out of the corner of your eyes to see Natasha standing closed to you, Yelena had stopped talking with a brunette in a dark suit, and both of them were walking towards you. You then lifted your eyes and soon you found the eyes of Carol looking at you with curiosity, after a moment the other woman smiled and nodded in understanding.

“I think we need to talk, Wanda, lead the way.”

Two years ago, on a day such as this, you discovered the pain behind a betrayal.

You glanced at the sky, the snowflakes falling slowly down the streets, the breeze caressing your warm cheeks while you waited patiently for Wanda to speak. The other woman had changed as well, she looked thinner, and tired, her hair was longer and she seemed quiet and alone. Wanda turned her stare to you and you could see their love and regret and loneliness.

“Why didn’t you stay?” She asked, her voice breaking by the end of the question.

You raised a single eyebrow snorting while shaking your head.

“You really asking that?”

“The ring…You were there…” Wanda started and you winced remembering that day, the old pain coming back as you remembered how it felt.

“I could have killed you and Vision.” You stated looking away from her. “I was so mad, so heartbroken, Wanda…I knew if I had stayed or said something…well, it would have ended in a bloodbath.”

Wanda winced wrapping her arms around herself, “I just…god, I’m sorry. I just…I’m so sorry for everything, I never…”

“What, Wanda? You never what?” You asked harshly, Wanda stepped back lowering her face.

“I was afraid, and I wasn’t sure of what I wanted, okay? I came back and you were already all over me, and I really didn’t know what you were expecting of me, and he was just there listening to me and…”

“And I didn’t? Wanda I asked you, everyday I tried to make our communication to work!” You huffed rolling your eyes at the excuses. “What were you hoping for, Wanda? A child? A dick? What?”

Wanda had thought about it in the last two years, she thought about her reason and why she had entered into a senseless affair with Vision. The truth was she didn’t know exactly why, she always thought that you had everything resolved by the time she came back, you had five years to organise your life and made decision for the future whereas Wanda had been trapped in nothingness until she came back to face a world she didn’t recognize. Vision had been the only one who understood, the only one who let her talk and expressed the way she wanted to about the situation, and in the midst of those conversations Wanda fell into passion and desire to make her life and indecision more bearable.

“I was just hoping everything went back to normal, and that…I didn’t feel so lost.” Wanda mumbled knowing her words meant nothing to you at the moment.

You sighed shaking your head, “I guess it doesn’t matter now.”

“Y/N, I just…I…search for you.” Wanda mumbled, you nod curtly at her.

“I know.”

“I want to explain, to tell you that it meant thing.” Wanda stated lowly. “I wanted to tell you that I Lov…”

“Don’t.” You cut her off before she could continue. “Don’t say it, you don’t have any right to say to me anymore, Wanda.”

Wanda stepped forward, holding back her tears she made sure her eyes were locked with yours, her heart beating fast and her whole-body trembling.

“I love you.” Wanda said softly. “I’m still in love with you, and I just…”

“Can you hear yourself, Wanda? If you love me you wouldn’t have done…you would have come to me first! We would have talked about this, about us!” You exclaimed waving your arms around. “You wouldn’t have cheating on me just because you felt alone or misunderstood.”

“Y/N…” Wanda started but she cut off as soon as someone entered the balcony you two were in.

“Hey, baby, are you…Oh, sorry, I’ll be inside if you…” Carol interrupted glancing at you then at Wanda, before turning around and leaving.

Wanda clenched her jaw, turning to you eyes that flickered between red and green.

“So, you left two years and you have replaced me already?” Wanda asked bitterly, you snorted shaking your head.

“Nobody can replace you, Wanda. You will always be my first love.” You stated softly, your heart fluttering at the veracity of your words.

Wanda clenched her eyes close, you closed the distance between you and her standing right in front of her. Your eyes drifting for a moment to see the ring you wanted to give her on her left hand.

“Wanda I loved you with my whole heart, I thought you and I will be forever but after I saw you with Vision, I couldn’t take it.” You mumbled placing a hand on hers, Wanda shivered and she knew there was a finality in your tone.

When she imagined this meeting the outcome was different inside her head. She always thought you would come wanting to go back but not without some kind of request or penance so everything could back to normal. She never imagined the outcome of this would be for Wanda to experience the same broken heart you had experience two years ago.

“I didn’t want this to happen.” Wanda mumbled wrapping her arms around herself, you pressed you lips together stepping back a little. “I thought we…”

“Me too.” You replied.

Wanda was about to take the ring away, but you stopped her offering a bittersweet smile to her.

“I made it for you, so…it’s yours, Wanda.”

The other woman broke into a half smile, but she was looking just miserable, she caressed the ring and the tears fell down slowly.

“Are you…are you happy?” She finally asked, you scowled at that question.

“Are you?”

Wanda sighed looking away before nodding, “yeah, yeah I am.”

You pressed your lips together, lowering your eyes before looking at her.

“That’s good.”

The lie rolled out of her lips easily, and while it was quite evident you knew Wanda was lying neither one of you was about to say anything at all. Wanda put her arms around herself, she wanted to say something else, perhaps asked how long passed after you left for you to get together with Carol, or how exactly did you two ended up being a thing. But Wanda knew that wouldn’t help at all, if anything would make her bitter.

“I guess…you better go back, I…Carol must be waiting for you.” Wanda turned her back to you, her eyes to the city.

You stood behind her, your hand lifting to reach out to her.

For a brief moment, it seemed as if you were to look for her, perhaps to talk or say something, anything that might change your situation and hers. You thought the moment you went back to her, that perhaps the old flame would ignite and that you and Wanda could offer one another a second chance. You were afraid that perhaps what you felt for Carol was just…revenged, and just a sense to fill up a void left by the broken heart.

But it wasn’t like that.

And while a part of you would always love Wanda, she wasn’t the person you were in love with.

Carol was playing with her drink on corner far away from everyone else, she was looking gloomy while pursing her lips. You softened lightly, strolling directly towards her.

“Hey, Marv, why are you pouting?” You chuckled when she lifted her face towards you, her eyes going wide before she tried to play it off.

“I’m no pouting.”

“You certainly look like someone who is pouting.” You chuckled leaning in to peck her cheek.

“I’m no pouting, and what are you doing here? I thought you were still talking to Wanda…” Carol looked away trying to conceal her emotion, she didn’t want to look jealous or insecure, she was supposed to be stronger than this.

You leaned in wrapping your arms around her waist, “mm, I was but now I’m not and I think I want to go home, so…shall we leave?”

Carol narrowed her eyes at you, it took her a moment before she placed a hand on your cheek.

“Are you okay?” She asked, tilting your head slightly.

“I am.” You replied smiling softly.

“Did you two…clear things up?” Carol didn’t want to look eager, nor did she want to sound desperate. But she had always known the conversation with Wanda was something you needed to do.

It was a chapter of your life that was waiting to be closed.

“I did, we did.” You hesitated before continuing. “I realized that a part of me would always love Wanda, she was my first love.”

Carol nodded in understanding, her mind soon brought Maria to memory, and she could relate to what you were saying. She was observing you with care, your eyes gleaming lightly as they locked yours, and Carol felt her heart skipped a beat at the softness and love she found there.

“Then, I realized that you are the love of my life, Carol.” You said it so simply Carol felt her abdomen and her heart flutter, making her body tingle at the revelation. “I am in love you with you, and I can’t imagine anybody else I want to be with but you.”

You had heard before how many people stated Carol Danvers was a flat, unfeeling individual, that she was just too unemotional, and quite incapable of expressing emotion. You had discovered this was far from the truth, Carol was someone who felt too much and suffered in silence; she was just selective with the people she allowed in her life.

“I love you to, Y/N.” She mumbled just before closing the distance and kissing you softly.

“Mhm, I think we better go.” You said smiling goofily at her, “wait until we tell Kamala where we were.”

“Oh, no please, she is going to start arguing with us because we didn’t bring her over.”

“Don’t worry, I have it covered, I ask everyone for their signature.” You replied showing a small notebook you had stolen from Kamala’s room. “I think with this we are forgiven.”

“My hero.” Carol stated rolling her eyes, you winked at her before grabbing her hand and dragging her around the room to say goodbye.

Wanda watched from a distance as you and Carol said goodbye, your face never lost the brightness brough by your smile and your hand never left that of Carol who was following you with tenderness and love all around the room. The young witch knew she had messed up her chances with you, she knew the moment she saw you entered the Avenger’s Tower that what would happen that day would be a final conversation more than anything. Wanda felt her heart break to pieces, her eyes filling up with tears as she finally realized she was alone.

She had tried to cover her mistakes, and her emotions with a meaningless night of passion that had costed her happiness.

Now, as you entered the lift with a laughing Carol by your side, she realized that you had said goodbye to her a long time ago.

That day Wanda had broken your heart while hidden in the shadows.

[penheadie]

Can we get some Monix headcanons? 👉👈

Oh boy where to start it's kinda embarrassing. I am so glad you asked. I have an entire storyline planned out about them (me and my friend project our ocs onto them all the time. I love the babies.)

They are sadly a doomed from the start couple

In the beginning it was definitely a one-sided love at first sight sort of deal. Mono had a pretty intense puppy love crush on Six from the get-go meanwhile Six at the start did not like him whatsoever and was more focused on surviving begrudgingly becoming his survival partner when she wasn't in the mood to get close to anyone again.

They're kinda both mentally fucked up in the head. Mono has abandonment issues and Six has survivors guilt developed from not being able to save Rain and believing she was the cause of it. They both have their own issues that they need to work out but they try to help each other through their differences.

The first time Mono had caught Six displaying more childlike innocent behavior was when he followed her out to the shoreline where he had witnessed her knack and talent for being smart and crafty, taking broken things and fixing them. He learned about her affiliation towards music boxes when he witnessed her dancing with the ballerina attached to the music box after she had just fixed it in her natural element. Something about seeing her like that made his heart flutter. (Think about that music box scene from the first Tinkerbell movie but with Six)

OKAY! OKAY! WARNING THIS IS MY FAVORITE ONE BECAUSE OF HOW CUTE IT IS GAHHHH! The first time Six tries to sneak a peek at Mono's face while he is asleep is unsuccessful. The first time Six asks Mono about why he hides his face he goes on to explain that the reason he hides his face is because that the entire world sees him as a monster. Without taking it off his head she slips her hand underneath the paper bag to try and feel around for his facial features. After coming to the conclusion that he is normal she squishes his cheek and she responds with “it doesn't feel like a monster here” the one time where Six actually does something cute and wholesome. Either that or the reason how she knows he's not a monster is because monsters don't have hearts, and she can feel his beating in his chest perfectly.

Whenever Mono is feeling insecure or ashamed about his face Six will proceed to drown him in a sea of little pecks and kisses until any lingering doubts about his face are gone. 

Six hunts for Mono and Mono cooks for Six. One time she brought him home a rat with the head decapitated from its body. Because of this he tries to introduce her to cooked foods and how much better they taste compared to raw food, since the only thing she seems to ever be capable of digesting is raw food. So he tries to get her to eat healthy. Six does not hog all of the food; she makes sure Mono can eat plenty too. 

Six gets inspired by Mono so she really wants to try to do good although her attempts are a little misguided. Six sucks really bad at being a good person but she's trying. 

Six is a biter. She chews her fingers and bites her knuckles as a nervous habit or when she is self-harming herself. Whenever Six is like that Mono will instead offer her his own hand, as he'd rather have her take out all of that pain and anguish she is feeling onto him rather than herself. Nobody said it was healthy. 

Mono loves hearing stories about when she was a baby from her older brother RK (or either her adoptive father Roger only the og's will understand this) since he was abandoned at birth he never really got the opportunity to experience what a family really is about and have people in your life who care for you.

Mono has already planned ahead, as he has big plans for the future that involves them getting married and having several children together living happily ever after (He doesn't know where babies come from) Six can sometimes feel a little overwhelmed with his expectations and sometimes feels like he didn't keep her thoughts in mind, asking her what she wanted first and was wondering if she got a say in this. Because as his “future wife” don't you think she should also get a say about whether or not they're going to have future children? Mono's dream of having many kids is meanwhile a nightmare for Six on the contrast. But don't worry when they get older and become adults they compromise about what the other wants.

For as much as Mono and Six love each other and have feelings for each other they struggle with communication as it isn't exactly as healthy as RK and Rain's relationship. They are both just shy and awkward little babies that don't know how to communicate their feelings of what the other wants. Which is one of the things that got them into trouble more times than once was the little miscommunication. Both of them had to keep secrets to keep the other safe in their eyes.

Six snuggles and is such a cuddle bug in her sleep! She cannot sleep without having Mono by her side or something to snuggle up against. It's just not the same without it. She is so tiny when she snuggles up against the lanky boy.

Mono and Six have nightmares on a regular basis as they were pretty common occurrences, Mono having nightmares about future events before they happen about Six abandoning him and Six having nightmares about all of her dead friends haunting her in her dreams and already pre-existing trauma. Whenever the other has nightmares there will be a long process with many stages in which the other will do nothing but hold them close, consoling them and offering them comforting words until they are reassured that there is nobody else here but them in their arms and that they are not at that terrible awful place. 

Six is asexual and Mono is bisexual. And they both willingly accept each other for who they are, as Mono wouldn't care if Six was a boy, or a girl, or a worm he will accept her for whatever she is.  

Now this is self-indulgent but tickle fights are a must between them. Sometimes if the Six is a little down in the dumps Mono will tickle her to try and lighten the mood. It's one of the few ways they can unwind together and have a chance to act like kids again. But Mono better expect Six to get him with some payback.  

Six had faith in Mono, as he used to tell her stories about how he was going to fix the world and bring it back to the way it was before the corruption took over; they were both going to fix the world together. That was the first time Mono ever made Six feel a sense of hope, and to find out that he is the source of the corruption later she sees that as even more of a betrayal and thinks that he lied to her, that is one of the reasons that makes the betrayal all that much more heartbreaking. 

Six realizes she has feelings for Mono around the time that he saves her from the collapsing building seconds right before the Thin Man kidnaps her.

Six is the one to initiate the first kiss. When Six gave him the first kiss she definitely did that thing where she lifted her leg because she is a little too short to be able to kiss Mono without standing on the tips of her toes in order to reach him. It took Mono a full thirty seconds to process what just happened, before quickly soon after Six was trying to resuscitate his useless butt with the defibrillator after she caused him to have a literal heart attack and die on the spot. Instant K.O. 

Just two little kids against the world with nothing more pure and sweet than innocent puppy love.

[eazy-peazy54]

ugh THANK YOU for making that will wood fandom post. okay this ask is gonna be super long and i’m really sorry to vent in your inbox but anyway. i heard about will on tumblr several years ago right after the normal album dropped but before he “blew up” (using that term loosely lol) and i’ve steadily watched his fanbase become more and more unbearable. for context i’m in my mid 20s, so unfortunately quite a bit older than a large portion of his current fans.

it’s really disappointing to me to see how strangely and unhealthily young people interact with media they like. i won’t waste time reiterating what you already said very well, but i will add something about the opposite end of the weird fan spectrum. so you basically called out some of the very public manic obsession that his younger fans display, but then there’s the other fans who do literally the opposite (to an obnoxious degree) where they say he’s literally just some guy etc. and like. i’m totally on board with the just some guy movement like yes let’s please acknowledge that artists are just people who happen to create something that you enjoy (especially small artists like will who aren’t even “famous” like he’s a niche indie artist that gained some recognition for a viral song but there are some kids out here treating him like a c-list celebrity like??) HOWEVER i do not understand why they have to act like any sort of emotional attachment to him or his work is toxic fan behavior. there’s absolutely no balance and it’s exhausting.

i personally feel like i and some of his older fans (older in age and duration i.e. mid 20s and/or been a fan since before early-mid 2021? i feel like that’s when he went viral) naturally engage in a more sane way. i personally am incredibly attached to his music, it means a lot to me, i listen to it a ton, and i also enjoy will as a person; i very much admire the brain, the mind, the person behind the art. i think he’s funny, intelligent, interesting, not to mention one of the most talented musicians / artists in general that i’ve ever come across. i like listening to him in interviews and on his podcast. and i think i manage all of that in a healthy and respectful way. i don’t think it’s difficult. but for some reason there are some fans who probably wouldn’t like the second part of that. they take “separate the art from the artist” way too far. “Do Not Have An Opinion About This Human You Perv”. it’s annoying. calling him pretty or attractive or whatever also gets met with some very weird reactions. “HE’S JUST A GUY” yes most of us are, in fact, just a guy™️ (gender neutral). saying he’s cute is not sexual harassment.

another thing that actually pisses me off so much is these fans describing and categorizing him based on their and their mutuals very specific demographic. “white teenage transmasc audhd neurodivergent mentally ill queer etc. etc. etc.” music. that is such a limited and myopic generalization. first of all, he had fans way before you, your age group is not his target demographic, nor is it his core demographic, on top of that he’s explicitly stated he doesn’t want people your age listening to him. he’s not for you. second, it absolutely makes sense that mentally ill people gravitate towards him given that he himself is severely mentally ill, so this part of the description pisses me off the least, but still, he’s also a recovering/recovered alcoholic, but i don’t see people saying he makes music for addicts? idk.

next is the queer bit. yeah gay people like him. i get it. he’s a queer safe space and that’s cool and i appreciate it but i feel like it’s still narrowing the categorization. he also has a lot of neurodivergent fans and i understand why. i think my main issue is just a combination of all of these very specific descriptors you know? like yeah he has fans that fit all of this but when you lump all of it together to describe his music and the entirety of his fandom then it becomes too much. whatever. anyway. the one that makes me the most mad is the white thing. i hate it when music that isn’t inherently racial is divided by race. it’s alienating and divisive and exclusionary and unnecessary. there are plenty of fans of color and there would probably be even more if some of y’all didn’t insist on generalizing his music based on your own limited experience. i think that’s sort of a microcosm of what a lot of poc talk about on here, about being shoved out of fandom spaces? like imagine you’re an adult queer black guy and you keep hearing about this will wood person who makes really cool music so you go to give it a try and find a bunch of 14yos calling him white preteen transmasc music. super off putting. even as someone who actually does fall into a couple (not all) of the demographics they talk about i know i would absolutely not be a fan now if i’d discovered him later than i did. which makes me sad. anyway. sorry this is definitely getting very long and rambly so i’m sorry about that i just have a lot of opinions about this fanbase.

oh my god this put everything i missed into words THANK YOU 😭

I completely agree with everything you just said!!! Honestly the whole big point with my essay was to just say "hey guys, don't be weird about this, and be respectful because there is a real person behind the screen!"

everyone who goes too far with the "HES JUST A GUY" thing isn't helping. its like. yeah, hes just a guy, but that doesn't mean i cant have any sort of attachment to his music whatsoever??? some people's idea of treating people like real people is really just treating them worse than how they were being treated before 😭

The people who are policing the fandom too much aren't helping either, its getting really exhausting to keep seeing posts saying "oh he looks really good in this photo!" and seeing like 200 replies being like "STOP SEXUALIZING YOU CREEP!!!!" (although there are people who actually do sexualize him, (which is really gross and weird) but i digress,)

music based fandoms are usually very,,, eh.. but honestly most of the fandom isn't bad, its just the people who take things to the extremes (in both directions) who are kind of making it a bit more awkward.

i think the fandom, and his music as a whole shouldn't just be narrowed down to "gay neurodivergent weirdo music," but it should just be like. "music for cool people" or hell, just fuckin "music"

[third-arch]

I was thinking of Law and Kanna having a second child…

⛈️🤍Trafalgar D. Ame !! 🐯⛈️

I don’t have any fanart yet, but based off what I heard about the character, he’s kinda like a fusion of Tamaki Amajiki, Ame, and Kazuma Ikezawa and growing up :0

His name would be Trafalgar D. Ame. He’d be Taiga’s little brother.

He’s really quiet and more melancholic and kept to himself. But he’s gentle and loves biology and anatomy like his dad.

He’s nerdy and doesn’t get along with others. He has a temper, but is overall much calmer.

He’s prone to being hard on himself and gets angry and stressed when frustrated that things aren’t going his way. That’s his temper.

He loves animals, too.

Law and Kanna would homeschool him/have a tutor like Chopper since he’d struggle with social interactions. Depending on his teacher would give him a certain quirk as he gets older.

So if it’s Law, he might do his signature dimpled smile.

If it’s Kanna, he’d have a gaze as gentle as the breeze.

If it’s Sanji, he’d smoke.

Etc.

He likes wolves and stuff like Warrior Cats and How to Train your Dragon. He also loves sentai and stuff like The Beatles and basketball.

He can play the flute and the piano. He tried learning the violin, but maybe it didn’t work out for him.

As he gets older, he starts acting a lot more like law. He becomes more of a self designated leader and is very noble. He’s a natural tactician, but gets shy.

He and Taiga would have a very fun dynamic. He’s more calculated and planned and willing to listen and take in the advice of others (despite his problem with criticism), while Taiga is more energetic and less rigid. He’d stop being soft spoken as much, but returns to it in his private moments.

He’d have Law’s golden eyes.

He’s not as strong as Taiga, but he helps her coordinate her attacks.

Kanna would cuddle him and reassure him and give him the affection he needs. She’d give Taiga the same love and independence they both need.

They’d both have a secure attachment style, Ame just a bit more anxious.

He really really looks up to Law. He wants to be like him and feels like he’ll never be good enough, when deep down, Law thinks otherwise.

Law and Kanna love Ame dearly, and Taiga would do anything to protect her little brother.

“Tch”

“Damn”

“Dad-ya”

“Mom-ya”

“Sis-ya”

“Tai-ya”

He struggles with depression. But they’re all there for him.

As for music, he’d like punk rock and stuff, too. He’d basically be into anything his dad was into growing up, just a bit more on the emo side.

He loves anime openings. Paper Moon, Unravel, Kizuna no Kiseki, stuff like that.

Law takes him to anime conventions. Kanna does, too.

He’s incredibly smart, and even has to help Taiga with her homework.

Law giving him hugs is just so wholesome too :))!!

[neverlookatthisblog]

Introducting- the Harlow babies

Mae Harlow

-Mae she is 6 years old the youngest of the Harlow babies

-loves coloring and drawing

-a goofy little girl

-she was born on December 6th in Louisville Kentucky (of course)

-she is most definitely a daddy’s girl which Jack loves

-mini him

-her obsession is with stuffed animals she finds comfort in them

-she is very much a shy girl but also a people’s person which could be confusing for you and Jack sometimes she only clicks with certain people

-she can be sassy sometimes and has a bit of a mouth which drives you crazy because she’s just like you

-very joyful

-loves to nap most kids cry when they have to go to sleep but her she can sleep all day if you let her

-

Jane Marie Harlow

-Jane is 9 years old born on July 9th Louisville Kentucky

-she is a bit more older than the rest of them she sometimes goes with Jack on tour

-she loves singing which at her age she’s pretty good at but Jack does not want her to be in the music industry because he knows how it is

- a sweetheart she loves giving back just like her dad

-she had a very good sense of humor just like Jack

-Jane is a moms girl she’s also gravitated towards you since she was a baby

-she loves spending time at grandma and grandpa’s house “can I go to grandma and grandpa’s house today” she loves there house so much she even stayed there for 2weeks one time

-she loves nature anything to do with insects,animals she loves it loves watching documentaries on animals

-

The Harlow twins Ryder and Ruth

-both 7 born on may 2 in Louisville Kentucky

-now these two are the trouble makers they get in trouble at lot since you and Jack agreed you wouldn’t spank your kids they spend most of there time in time out

-Ryder he loves to skateboard for his birthday he got a skateboard which he was very excited about

-Ruth on the other hand loves reading she reads a lot almost to much to the point it’s night time and she’s still reading

-one thing you could say about them is that there very caring towards there siblings

-they can’t do anything without each other they are attached to the hip they love matching it’s just there thing

-when they were born you immediately had to make a mental note about which one is which because they look so much alike you thought it would be hard to tell but once they got older it was easier to tell them apart

I’m excited to start doing dad jack fics because I love reading them there so adorable and cute I hope you guys are excited as much as I am 🥰🤍

[cuckoo-among-beasts]

Ok, I'm finally writing this, the Ezra and Huaisang connection, aka how I came to feel some kind of connection to this gremlin. I can't tell when that exact moment happened and by that time I had finished the donghua and started on both the novel and web series. In general, I tend to get attached to characters similar to myself, but me and Huaisang doesn't share that much, the biggest difference being him fine with seen as useless and frivolous, while I'm the exact opposite, terrified of being seen as useless, lazy and good-for-nothing. He's also considerably more social than I am. I also tend to rp more "hero-like" characters and although Huaisang isn't a villain, imo, he's definitely not a hero either (the first mdzs character I thought of rping was actually LXC). So what made me steer out from my comfort zone?

Well, we aren't completely different, Huaisang and I, but I'm not going to go into details about that. I'm just going to write about main things that made me love this lazy, cunning, lovable gremlin. This might end up being a bit rambling and it will be very personal. Might end up being long too. I will probably not re-read it, so if it ends up sounding weird or grammatical errors and whatnot, sorry about that. And yes, most of it will be about me since I need to explain shit for anyone to get it.

I was born during a blizzard, it was -40C at the time, this was all a rather unlucky sign since children born during storms are said to bring chaos. Therefore, my parents... ok, I'm kidding. Well, not really, I was born during those conditions and tradition says that will bring chaos, but it has nothing to do with what I'm about to write, I was just thinking about how to start and this popped up. Sorry, sorry.

Let's try again. For as long as I can remember, I've always had a love for art and beauty. I used drawings to communicate before i could properly speak (which I have no memories of). I always loved to draw, but also appreciated others' art, including crafts, sculptures and so on. As a very young child, I could randomly start crying because I found things so beautiful, which also included music and the sounds of words. During early childhood tests, my parents were always told I seemed gifted, if not particularly sociable and communicative. I was a sensitive child, who cried easily and frustrated easily. A child that was either constantly moving or could sit for hours staring, who froze in the middle of things and just daydreamed (I'm still guilty of this) or who could just flop down and take a nap whenever. My three main interest as a child was: drawing, reading (in which ancient China ended up being a favourite subject xD ) and walking around in the forest where I lived watching nature and animals, especially birds (we had several different bird houses, since both my parents are nature lovers as well). This all sounds pretty nice, doesn't it? And it was, at first.

I was repeatedly told off for being too sensitive (funny enough, I was also told off for not emoting enough, all this is still a mystery to me), for not being attentive and sociable enough, for being lazy, for being too chatty (but also too quiet, once again this weird thing where I'm still not sure where the limit goes). Hearing this and other things enough times and you start to realise you're wrong and I started to do my best to change. This was also when I realised that people prefer too little over too much, so even if I couldn't grasp what was emotional enough or chatty enough, if I kept myself stoic and quiet (even when I wanted to and could speak), that was more acceptable than me "overreacting" and "never shutting up". I was still an outsider though, something I would always be and still am. No matter how much I've tried to fit in. At least I still had my interests. For now.

As I grew older and things like job and career starting to creep into my life (around the age of 12, since that's when they start asking you about high school and by then you need to know if you want to study a theoretical or practical program and also what kind of that you want, you can't mix and match subject in the way you do in the US, for example) and I had no answers to what I wanted to do. All I know I liked, and wanted to do, was read, write and draw. I was repeatedly told that's not a career and I should stop with those fancies and not waste my intelligence on "aesthetics" (by this time, I had been in three class plays with fairly prominent roles in all three and I started in the church choir at the age of 8). Hearing this over and over, as well as being severely bullied (by both students and teachers), I basically stopped drawing and at 16, I quit the church choir too, saying I needed to focus on my studies, in reality, I had begun to develop pretty bad anxiety (this all culminated in my early twenties when I basically shut myself in in my flat, it's gotten better since, but I still struggle to talk to strangers or show anything I've created out of fear of rejection and ridicule as well as me being extremely sensitive to criticism. And yes, I do miss the acting and the singing sometimes, especially the singing, I've always loved that too). And yes, I did not choose the "art program" in high school, I went to the "social science program - focus: environment, humans and society" (a mix of science and social science). To keep things short, I eventually got my current diagnoses and began drawing again, which helped. I still don't do it as much as I should. I also still don't allow myself the rest my brain seems to need. I do allow myself to cry when needed when I'm alone now. To make it even shorter, I started to try and find my "true self" again. This included being honest about my transmasculine gender identity. And then it came again. The negativity. How I couldn't be things because "real men" aren't this and that way again. Scared of being unaccepted, I once again hardened myself. Now it also included stop wearing nail polish and getting a more traditional masculine appearance and just generally removing anything "feminine" with how I looked or acted: no emotions, no crying, no softness. Hell no. I just wanted people to believe me when I said I'm not a woman. Since that was it. I wasn't, isn't, a woman, but I'm also not a man and not until I moved her to the UK did I find out that you can be neither and still also be masculine (I'm not going to go into details about my gender identity here, feel free to ask if you want to, but to quickly specify it, I'm a transmasc agender).

Anyway, this is where Huaisang enters. Here is this fictional guy where many of my bad traits and many does dislike him for them, but he doesn't give a shit about that. He is unapologetically himself, and as much as Mingjue complains about him, I think we all know he indulged his didi, making him feel loved for who he is for most of the time. And not only is Huaisang unapologetically himself, he prides himself for his artistic interests, his sensitivity, his uselessness and laziness. My mind made a 360 at that and then... once I realised, I cried. I'm admitting that. Why did this fictional character get to be what I weren't allowed to be? He's even a (cis) male! Outrageous! Yes, I admit that too, I got angry and jealous at a fictional character. It went over quickly. Instead I started to love him and also realise that if someone could come up with a character with these traits that were loved and had friends and so on, then maybe, just maybe, I'm not completely wrong and broken?

Huaisang has partly helped me to try and start taking steps to find who I am now. I'm working on growing out my hair, I've bought nail polish again (only used black so far, but I have a lovely pale mother-of-pearl pink next to me I want to use) and I want to wear beautiful clothes again (still needs to be comfy though), even if I haven't dared checking out the women's section yet (since the men's one are boring and we all know it), but at least the will is there now. I'm trying to get back to drawing and painting more again, but that's also effort since it requires me to take things out and put it away each time. I've returned to some bird watching though.

Huaisang might not be the best fictional role-model you can have, but I think I needed him, still does, he makes his gremlin comments to me sometimes (obviously, I know this is me talking to me). He definitely drives me insane at times (I'm too much of an "Orderly Lan" to him), but it's worth it. The true charmer he is, he managed to even charm me into stepping out of my boundaries, both as myself and for the type of muses I usually portray.

Now, where can I find a real life Mingjue for myself? xD

[horrificallydesperate]

ੈ✩‧₊˚༺ Introduction ༻ੈ✩‧₊˚

Have you ever wanted to hear a teenager complain about not getting enough attention from grown men? Maybe the idea of having someone sadly ponder why they are so attached to older figures is appealing to you? If any of those statements sound relatable, you've come to the right place!

Hello! You can refer to me with any name or alias you'd like, and I've been in this community for a little while now. This blog isn't meant to be very professional or anything, simply a way for me to voice my feelings sometimes.

Here are some answers to any possible queries you may have about me:

Who are you?

a man, a depressed teen, and a person with many interests! Here are some of the basic ones needed to contextualize my postings:

writing (poetry is especially cool, but I enjoy the regular and academic type as well + fanfiction!)

philosophy, though being honest I'm not too knowledgeable on it in the historical sense. I still enjoy learning more about it.

psychology

music (every kind, excluding the specific type of UK drill where its just brits yelling over a mediocre beat. Sorry if thats your thing!)

photography

academics in general, though I don't have the best grades

reading (mostly fun stuff, as I'm not the biggest fan of the "Classics" like Dostoyevsky and other such authors, as I fear I'm not smart enough for them yet)

*please note, the previous statement excludes my glorious kings George Orwell and Ray Bradbury's works. I love those guys

Why are you like this?

To be honest, although the obvious answer of fatherly issues should be taken into consideration as to why I do these things, I've always found comfort in imagining healthy relationships with older male figures. These posts aren't even necessarily romantic in nature, it's more like a very strong bond I have with these teachers, that I struggle to differentiate from a crush.

Who are your TC's?

Mostly a teacher who I will dub as the 🦦 emoji, though recently another one who I will put as 🐦‍⬛ has been circling my mind. I am not sure if I will even mention them in specific anyways, but these emojis are here if I ever do.

Anyways, please do not interact with me if this content makes you uncomfortable in any way, if you are going to try and "fix" me, or if you're gonna be plain mean.

Stay defiant my party people!!! 🫂

[shytastemakerthing]

hi! I hope you're having a nice day/night! can I ask for a TWST matchup?

I have she/her pronouns. I'm about 5'2, but I look a bit older than I am. I have dark brown eyes and black hair, and I'm Hispanic [Venezuelan]. My music taste is all over, but my favorite artist is Melanie Martinez. I like writing creatively and drawing. I'm in a lot of fandoms but my main three are MPHFPC, TWST, and PJO/HOO. I have attachment anxiety, and do get anxious very easily. I have a tendency to either be tired asf and not talk that much, or have too much energy. My personality is kinda rude at first, but I'll be nice if I like you. I'm a but on the introverted side, tho. My love languages are quality time, and gifts. Ty!

Hello! Thank you so much for your request! I'm finally able to get these rolling out so hopefully by the end of the week, maybe a little into next, I'll be able to have everyone's done! I thank you all so much for your patience, it is been a very hectic time for me between work, school, hurricane, and just Overall sickness that seems to be going around!

Note: This one was a little hard because I had too many ideas but I managed to narrow it down! I also saw there was no preference for romantic or platonic so this is romantic as default, if you would like platonic, don't hesitate to message me😊

CW: None!

I match you with........

Floyd Leech

🐚 He totally understands how you go from being tired and quiet to all of a sudden being the most loud and outgoing person on campus.... that's literally him. He understands the constant changes in one's mood and all that comes along with it. Honestly, out of everyone at NRC, he supports you the absolute most.

🐚 Floyd is absolutely someone who would love some quality time. Everyone always runs away from him because of.... well, just being him. So the fact that when you see him zooming towards you at breakneck speed with open arms, honestly, he feels all warm and fuzzy inside.

🐚 There is a lot that you guys could do as far as spending time together. You could meet him for basketball practice (if you show up to games, he will be showing off), you could come and see him at work (Azul begs you to come bevaise when you're there, the moody eel actually decides to work), but he will absolutely LOVE to go swimming with you, especially if he gets to be in his merform.

🐚 Floyd is a chronic gift giver, change my mind. He sees anything and everything a gift that he could give to you, and he loves when you gift him anything back. He will show up at random times with shells that he found, pretty rocks, a random flower, maybe even a free drink. But the one he is especially proud of, was a little charm bracelet that had a little eel on it with some shells and a pearl. He sees you wearing that and you have a very happy and clingy eel.

🐚 By default, if you're with Floyd, you're bound to see Jade a lot ad well. At first, it was rather creepy, but Jade was genuinely checking to see if you truly do care for his brother. Sure, people have shown interest in the past before, but more often than not, it never ended too well. So, to see that you genuinely love his brother, it brings an actual smile to his face. You certainly have his blessing.

🐚 If you draw Floyd by any chance, prepare for him to that that picture and literally frame it in his room. It's his most prized possession at this point. And if you ever ask him to model for you? Well, just make sure he keeps his shirt on because man does not care, if you wanna draw him, you'll draw all of him. If that's not your thing, voice it real fast. But he will LOVE it if you draw him in his merform.

🐚 Speaking of merform, he would be absolutely content to just lounge in one of the pools in his natural form, you just resting on his chest as he floats around. Usually, he hates being stationary for long periods of time. He gets antsy. But with you there relaxing, so content and comfortable snuggling up to him, he doesn't feel that urge to just flop around. Jade and Azul are both surprised and impressed.

🐚 Overall, he understands you better than anyone else. Between the constant changes in your mood (he is the same and has become a pro at reading you, and vice versa), how he lives it when you draw him, or the little gifts you receive from one another, I sure hope you like the Leech name because he is determined and certain that you're going to share it with him one day.

[katyspersonal]

Top 5 flowers

Five - Anemone! Especially red one

It is a kind of red that I love the most, but I just love the contrast. This flower, no matter the color, will always have dark purple, almost black middle and often white rim around it. I think this is perfect, very pleasing on the eyes. There is some unexplainable sadness about this flower from it... You know, like external beauty, but 'rotten' core from colors alone. Gives me the feeling of a dead inside person that still tries to maintain happy exterior, very moving.

Four - Black Lily!

Black might be not quite my color, but I adore this flower for the sinister vibe! Not only it has not a color you might expect from flowers, but it also has not a very pleasant smell... And to add on that, it is pollinated by flies! A "unlikable" flower, pollinated by "unlikable" insects... I really love it how even in nature, the 'weirdos' find each other! It is emotion that draws me towards this flower so much.

Three - Jade Vine!

It is a beautiful tropical flower, one of those types that are dangling from above. And, it is pollinated by bats! I love the structure and the color a lot! Although, this flower does have a red variant, too:

I discovered this flower while researching Japanese flower meanings (Hanakotoba), and this flower, the 翡翠葛, means 'do not forget me'. Notice the color variation of cyan/aqua and red... Sure, this flower has even more meaning for me after my Bloodb0rne brainrot- just like 'pale' Moon and Bloodmoon! Haha, don't you think these flowers would suit Ludwig and Laurence quite well? It is both color-coding and the fact that they both fell from grace and somewhat faded, hence 'do not forget me'...

Two - Hydrangea! Especially blue one!

I love bushed flowers a lot in general, and this is my favourite amongst them. Variety of the colors is awesome, but the 'original' greenish-white is always nice to see as well! In where I live, people do not really cultivate colorful variants; I only saw BARELY blue hydrangea just once over here. But I just love these HUGE chunks of tinier flowers. Also, I loved to feature them in some of my much older drawings:

One - Lotus!

Absolutely BEAUTIFUL flower with deep spiritual meanings attached to it. I, of course, have additional soft spot for it since it is a water flower. It is so incredibly soothing to look at, I feel so much joy of life and serenity seeing this kind of flowers. I adore the giant pad leaves, too. There is a lake that is overgrown with lotus flowers within a reach of a bus or small train trip in where I live, so I am seeing those every August!

To be fair, water lilies should be here too, they are just as lowed, but there can be only one...

----------------------------

Honourable mention - Edelweiss!

Could not fit it in, it would fall on the #6th place, but I still love this flower. It is so fluffy and adorable! x) A lot of cultural connotations, too, with surpassing the adversity and "proving" one's love and all that... And both of my favourite Russian music bands coincidentally have a song that simply praises this flower!

Thank you so much for asking for this top! It really cheered me up!

[teeth--thief]

Have you seen Tetris (2023)? Unrelated: what music do you like, or listen to?

-R

I have seen Tetris, yes! Just a few weeks ago, sometime in March, matter of fact, so your timing is particularly incredible. It first haunted me in music form, believe it or not, I kept getting songs from its soundtrack recommend on Spotify.

While I usually really don't like the KGB is in your walls stuff that the Western films always insist on showing, I'll make an exception for this movie because it's pretty fun. I actually liked the Evil Liar KGB had going on, I thought it was very funny. I do have one complaint about the whole thing, though. I wish the pixel animation was utilised throughout the whole movie, not just in That One Scene... :( Just small, little bits (ha) would have been fine...

Fun (not really) fact: I was first introduced to the character of Robert Maxwell through this movie (you have to forgive me for not giving many fucks about the aristocrats of Britain). I have then immediately learnt that his daughter is Ghislaine Maxwell. The Ghislaine Maxwell. Jeffrey Epstein's partner (in crime). How delightful...

What music do I like... That's a terrible question to ask me because I'm very passionate about music... I have playlists for everything I like, even Chernobyl related one... there's not a free minute in my day that I'm not listening to something. I associate music with everything.

I mean, judging solely by the fact that my wardrobe consists of one too many Sabaton and Rammstein shirts, I'd have to say I'm particularly fond of metal. And punk. And rock. I occasionally listen to Hollywood Undead because I discovered it when I was a... young teen, much too young to be listening to that kind of stuff lmao, and so I feel oddly nostalgic about them.

I really like the... weird and experimental stuff? If it has some kind of a connection with nature, I will probably like it. I've been a long time fan of Cosmo Sheldrake - and he just released a brand new album Eye To The Ear on the 12th of April AND a new single just a few days ago... it's everything I could have expected and more, truly. His brother, Merlin (whimsical names is the theme) is a biologist and he wrote a book about fungi, which I really like, but haven't finished because I didn't have the time nor brain capacity to take in all that new information.

And continuing with the theme of slighly weird, I also enjoy video games/movies OSTs. The creepier the better. Little Nightmares (I&II) soundtrack? Perfection. I talk a lot of shit about HBO's Chernobyl but that show's OST is phenomenal (and that's the last nice thing I have to say about it 🙄). From not horror-esque soundtracks: stuff from DOOM.

I've also been mesmerised by the Polish folk music used throughout The Peasants and have been regularly listening to the whole soundtrack. I need to rewatch that movie ASAP... more on movie tracks, I also really like Mad Max: Fury Road's and Moon (2009)'s OSTs.

I also like older, classic bands... Pet Shop Boys, Soft Cell, Bronski Beat, Depeche Mode... Kult, if we're talking local... And because I AM beating the toxic masculinity allegations: MARINA, Paris Paloma, Caro Emerald and sometimes even Lana Del Rey and Mitski. Other than that, I'm rarely attached to one particular artist or band, I usually like two or three songs and hate the rest haha

I'm gonna add a bunch of songs I like under the cut as a little treat, just because:

[muppetmagic]

Hehehe. Hi. Saw your tags on my post and would love to hear your own headcanons for T1 Marty. It's an interesting one to ponder for sure!

*chuckles evilly* oh boy, of course!!! i truly end up headcanoning any character i like with t1 diabetes for the soul reasoning of 'well, SOMEONE has to!'

SO!! marty mcfly with type 1 diabetes! where do i even begin! well, i will say that as i am a bttf musical enthusiast, im mainly gonna focus on that instead of movies 2 +3, just because im not AS familiar with them as i am the first movie and a musical!

so, join me under the cut for a LOT of thoughts and headcanons...i have a lot to say lol like a LOT a lot...i apolgise lol

so, i think marty was diagnosed with t1 when he was around 9-10, and was doing ye olde pee-on-a-stick method of blood sugar testing, which was a super inaccurate way of doing it BUT it was either that of nothing in the mid-to-late 70's. he would have always been taking one injection of insulin and just praying it all worked out around that dkjdfjk ah, the joys of early diabetes treatment!

i like it think marty is like me in the sense that i naturally have blood sugars that tend to be on the higher side, and because it wasn't a thing to treat a high blood sugar with more insulin back then, it's why he took up skateboarding!! exercise gets that blood sugar down and his brother, dave, let marty use a skateboard that he had been gifted and never used. thus, marty started skating and just really fucking liked it!

as he got older and all that, and blood glucose monitors became a thing, AND marty became friends with doc, things did a pretty quick turn around in regards to how he treated stuff. doc would've gotten one look at the medieval torture device looking stuff marty was carrying around in his backpack and gone 'nope, i can make this a lot easier!' and basically invented a more modern version of a bgm - u prick ur finger with the lancet, put ur blood onto a calibrated strip into the machine and get a reading! although, i believe it would be less accurate for obvious reason. more likely that you'd either get a 'HIGH' 'LOW' OR 'REGULAR'.

in regards to insulin, as i mentioned earlier, marty would've been on one daily injection for most of his childhood. which is a real annoyance, bc it means ur meals have to happen at certain times with certain amount of carbs. by the time we meet marty in the movies/musical in 1985, he most likely would've just become aware of insulin pens - they legit came out that year lol BUT because i think doc is out here being a disability activist, marty might have received one a lil earlier and without the big ol' price tag attached to it lol so he would've been taking multiple injections a day by the time we meet him!

YES, i use doc as a scapegoat to give marty nicer treatment options!!! he deserves it!! if u have a friend who is a mad scientist, then of COURSE ur gonna abuse that to try and get new and improved and FREE medical equipment! so, i think marty has this stuff in his pockets alongside his walkman lol

i also think the reason marty is known to be as such of a slacker as he is is because besides all the sick days he would have taken, he's also known for sneaking out of class and/or showing up late to take his blood sugars or take his insulin.

the idea of marty having an insulin pump is also something i really like! again, i think doc was able to get his hands on one and rejigged it to fit into the shell of a walkman, which would be great for stealth lol. for me, this applies a lot more to my headcanons relating musical!marty. basically, i think movie!marty has insulin pens, and i think musical!marty has a pump. idk why, i just do djkdfkj i just think musical!doc would

SOOOO, marty in the 50's!! of course, we get marty on the hunt for ANYTHING to drink without sugar - and that's very relatable lol, again as someone with naturally higher blood sugars, i also tend to just find it 100 times easier to have low sugar options than use up SOOO much insulin! but in terms of how tf he's gonna make it thru a week when it comes to insulin, i think because he was meeting doc at the mall so early in the morning, he threw an extra vial or two in his pockets just in case. marty can never be too sure what's going to happen when he meets up w/ doc lol i also think musical!young lorraine would've been DEEPLY confused about what tf all this stuff attached to this boy she has straight up undressed is, and honestly she probably just ripped his infusion site straight out on accident so marty probably returned to injections anyways - but with is 80's sensibilities on how diabetes WORKS and how it's treated, he would've been pretty on top of everything. he would've just had to use those fugly giant syringes. flop!!

once returning to '85 in the new timeline, nothing would have changed w/ marty diabetes bc, well, he would've been diabetic anyways! his parents would be a lot more supportive, a lot bigger disabilitiy activists - i think george mcfly definitely has a diabetic character in his novels! and lorraine is on the pta board FIGHTING for the rights of disabled students BIG TIME, while in the og timeline i imagine they were very much in the mind set of not talking about marty's diabetes bc they saw it as shameful or somehow their fault. catch the mcfly family car having a bumper sticker that says 'someone i love has type 1 diabetes!'

so YEAH, i think that's everything that came to mind for me! musical!marty is defs more the muse of my diabetic headcanon, i think just bc im currently obsessed w/ it so im projecting onto him harder but, BASICALLY;

tl;dr: marty has t1, in the movie he uses insulin pens that he gets from doc, in the musical he uses an insulin pump that doc decked out to make a lot cooler and both verses use a blood glucose monitor that the doc made a lot more compact. ALSO, just for the hell of it - fuck it! jennifer is diabetic too! they knew each other from school but really met at the hospital while they were waiting for diabetes clinic appointments and they bonded lol!

[edithlovesyou]

SLASHER HEADCANNONS!!!

alright, so first off, i have NEVER don't this before lol i am trying my best with wording and i try to keep everything gender neutral lol (I fixed this up, older writing update- almost a year later)

THOMAS HEWITT

he tries his best to be gentle

he canonically has the emotions of a child so he probably has a lot of moments

he has Messy handwriting, barely legible

he Tries to give you gifts after being accepted into the family

He loves flowersss, I would like to think sunflowers in specific but change it if you feel different lol

He has a favorite chainsaw, he would never tell though because his family is full of a bunch of jerks

he has extreme attachment issues, his family taught him that family is all that matters. if you're family, you cant leave

JASON VORHEES

A very kind soul, i feel he would love animals. humans are a different story.

he Also loves flowers, possibly allergic tho? idk I just vibes from him that say no pollen near him.

he Loves to draw in a kiddish style, I feel like sometimes being a kid makes him feel a bit better about what happened

he Really likes collecting souvenirs from victims, like what he did with his mother in a way, just a memory

You hear the occasional waterboarded gurgling sound, he can still push water through and around his lungs I can imagine, so the sounds are basically his version of clearing his throat lol

DANNY JOHNSON (jed olson, dbd ghostface)

That camera is his life

he's Not really perverted, but sometimes says things and realizes it sounds dirty

Nasty gloves, never cleaned. Ever.

Weird southern accent but not really a southern accent??? idk Every fanart image I've seen of him he looks like one of those people you never know what they are saying or what their accent is or if it's even real

A crooked smile, again with the fanart, he looks like the type to be a bit more southern

A shit ton of acne probably, sweaty mask things

RZ!MICHEAL MYERS

he probably has Stretch marks, that is a BIG man. no way this man doesn't have them

he Loves all his masks and if he ever broke one you can expect a memorial, they are like his version of people

he probably Cringes around clowns because of the old mask, bad memories

he Prefers loose clothes, this isn't really shown but he seems like the type

he is a Nature lover, not to animals tho. just the scenery

He understands emotions he just doesn't care, like a cat

BO SINCLAIR

toothpick in his mouth for no reason, and I'm sure Lester has asked why

he Can go from laughing to pure evil in seconds, we've seen it

he HATES animals with a passion

He feels very safe in his work overalls, just comforting to be in his element

Just saying, he is probably old fashioned. he could probably pick up on modern things if people tried to teach him, will he care? no

LESTER SINCLAIR

he has a Crooked smile but thinks it fits him, again with the southern things, only this time he is self aware and like how he looks

he Finds comfort in the smell of dead animals, let's be real. that man goes to that pit because he knows nobody will try to find him.

he makes Crude jokes but in a good way? (If that makes sense??)- like he fully understands what he's saying but he knows how to word it and make it not as bad. you can still tell what he's saying tho

Eyebags to hell and back, stays up around the pit

he Loves old country, especially on his truck radio

Probably likes the game sorry for the popping sound, I see him as the type to like random sounds

VINCENT SINCLAIR

sculpting helps him when he's anxious about anything

he Loves the wax house dog more than anyone, since his brother isn't really comforting for him, why not a dog?

he tried many masks before settling on one face shape, too picky

he loves sweaters

piano music is his life

he might Make the occasional sound that startles people, other than that, no words from this man

ALRIGHT, hello i am edith! This is my first time writing but i plan on improving and taking requests for readers, i plan on doing any gender, body type, features people want added, anything! That's all <3- - - updated ver lol- I'm dallas or dahlia depending on the day, and I fixed this up! if others have seen it before and wonder why it's different, that's why lol I don't really have time to do fresh writing right now, so I'm doing this

[mak3itr7ght]

pair: Namjoon x fem!reader (Sing au)

genre: Animation movie, fantasy, romantic.

Movie: Sing

*Is it possible for a human being the a koala's nephew? Well.. nothing is impossible~

Namjoon's pov

The Moon theater.. the world's most beautiful theater, in my opinion.

My uncle, Buster Moon, is the chief of this amazing theater and I really admire him.

Since I was a child, I come here to watch the shows' premiere.

To be honest, at first, they seemed boring...

But.. I've really felt sorry when I discovered that the whole building just collapsed and that my uncle lost everything.

Because..yes, for him, this theater is his life, above all, 'cause my grandpa worked hard for buying it for his son.

Luckily, my uncle's positivity never betrayed him, not even then:

He setup a pseudo theater with the remains of the old one, and obviously, with the help of his crew too, then bring a mind-blowing show.

He managed to rebuild the Moon Theater, and after several adventures, he managed to debut together with the other members of the crew in the famous town of Redshore City, in the Crystal Tower Theater, just think... that even the great Clay Callway was part of the show and now...it's part of the crew!! But I think you already know all the details, don't you?

It seemed like a hopeless situation! But my uncle's voice was still enthusiastic as he told me what had happened and it was also full of amusement. After hearing this story and seeing for myself the show that brought uncle Buster and his crew to their current fame, "Out of This World", literally a whole new world opened up for me.

I started to appreciate theater more and also started to develop the dream of wanting to bring my own show. I've always loved hip hop and rap for as long as I can remember.

I always had a deep connection with music, through my lyrics I tried to express myself and most of the time I was able to do it great, in fact, I still do it now.

Even at school I spent hours writing down lyrics, and I got numerous scoldings from the teacher because I completely forgot about the lesson.. one day, I even rapped the verse of one of my songs, out loud, during a class test... despite this, however, I was a model student!

Anyway....

other times, I did Freestyle battles with my other classmates or older students and... I always won, modestly. And  when I don't write lyrics or produce songs, for lack of inspiration, I take refuge in books or in nature. Books inspire me a lot and also thanks to them I have the pleasure to flex my open mind.

I like reading especially under the huge oak near my house, with the sounds of nature accompanying my reading sessions.

Going back to my big dream... before becoming interested in the theatre, I didn't have a real dream, in fact one of the songs I am most emotionally attached to, is "No more dream", written before my conversion. I would love to include it as an introduction to my show.. but I never had the courage to talk about it with Uncle Buster.. but today I know it's the right day to tell him!

I'm sure he'll take my idea and help me make it happen! I run to the theater with a USB full of songs that I recorded. I enter into my uncle's office, almost breaking the door, because of the emotion, and find Miss Crawly, my uncle's over 100 year old secretary(Johnny and Ash speculate that she has existed since the time of the dinosaurs) cleaning the desk.

'Good morning, dear Namjoon!! Did you sleep well?'

After all, she's a sweet old lady.

'Good morning, Miss Crawly! Yes! I slept very well!

Can you tell me where I can find uncle Buster?'

I ask, impatiently.

'Oh, Mr. Moon is downstairs, he's helping the guys carrying their suitcases!'

I am perplexed.

'Suitcases?'

'Yes! The tour starts today! Don't you remember?'

Oh god the "Out of This World" tour.. I totally forgot about that.

I won't see my uncle for months... And I'll have to postpone the realization of my dream... again...

I go, feeling down, with Miss Crawly, downstairs where i find uncle Buster on his own. I run to hug him and wish him a safe journey. I'm sure this tour will take the show even higher and I'm so happy for the whole crew. This has always been my uncle's biggest dream and then... he deserves it, he has gone through everything to achieve this goal, he worked hard, all of the members worked hard.

'Listen, Nam, I want to give you a very important task!'

Uncle's voice always energizes me, he's always so full of positivity, one of the many reasons I admire him.

'What kind of task??'

I ask, curiously.

My uncle is unpredictable, you never know what can go through that hairy head.

'I want to entrust the teather to you!!'

HE WANTS TO DO WHAT?

...

...

I don't know what to say, I can only gasp. I told y'all, my uncle is unpredictable... but I didn't that much..

'I'm sure you're the best person to run our wonderland! And then you will not be alone! Miss Crawly will be there to help you!'

I can't say anything, but I think uncle felt my happiness. That theatre, that place of wonder, would become mine, temporarily, but mine.

my uncle smiles. I knew he would understand anyway. He always told me that he finds a little bit of himself in me. And there is no more beautiful compliment for me.

'But now, if you'll excuse me, the bus is leaving!! I love you, my nephew!!'

And after hugging me again.. he goes away, leaving the whole theater in my inexperienced hands.. But come on... at least there's Miss Craw-

'Namjoon!! Have you seen my glass eye????'

...okay maybe it will be more difficult than expected..

As I help Miss Crawly in looking for her glass eye, hoping I haven't already crushed it and shattered it into a thousand pieces under my foot, without realizing it, in my head there is a tangle of thoughts and ideas but, obviously, the most accentuated one, and which let a toothy smile appear on my face, is certainly to make my biggest dream come true. It seems a bit as if uncle already knew..and therefore he had literally left me a blank check..because when Uncle Buster is absent with the company, generally, the theater remains closed..

I turn around, looking at the building keys, in my hands.

Now it almost seems as if uncle, with this move, told me "Hurry up and seize the moment, my nephew" By now I'm almost 30 years old, I want to bring my own show and I'll try now, moreover, I also want to discover myself and I really want to identify myself as Namjoon Moon and not just "Buster Moon's nephew". I run to the office to move all the songs I've written down over the years to my uncle's computer, at least the most suitable ones, and I start writing the script for my show. As soon as I conclude the first draft of the storyline, I realize that it is already evening.

I decide to print the script and, while looking for a stapler, I finally find the Miss Crawly's glass eye, I have to advise her to put more glue on it..

After a week finally the plot of my show is finished and ready to be put on stage. I also adjusted the melodies and lyrics.

Now the main problem ... the actors / singers and dancers .. I think it will not be a piece of cake as my face is little known beyond my neighborhood, also I have never presented myself as a public figure, but it won't be bad to try, right ? Maybe my surname will help me in this case.

'Miss Crawly!! Can you please print some flyers for the show's auditions? I'll send you a draft!'

Miss Crawly's office is literally attached to my uncle's, so between our offices there was just a transparent window. So i asked her to print the flyers with all the info about the auditions, like the time of the event, it will be tomorrow at 9:30 PM.

Hope we will be able to deliver all of them in time... 

After printing enough flyers were printed, the Miss Crawly's fan just decide to 'share' them by flying them out of the window...well...so.. the teather itself is trying to help me. 

I remember that this happened to uncle Buster too, when he was still in debts .. maybe it will bring me good luck too. I cross my fingers..

I'm going to move here, for this period. I will sleep in uncle's room. Yes, he sleeps in the theatre, did I already tell you that this theater is literally his life? Probably yes. Now that I think about it, I'm starting to bond with it too. I feel that... something beautiful, really beautiful, is about to happen.

Y/n's pov

"I'd still catch a grenade for ya

Throw my hand on a blade for ya

I'd jump in front of a train for ya

You know I'd do anything for ya.."

I love this song. I've always been a big fan of Bruno Mars and this song is one of favorites of all the time. I've always imagined what it was like to feel a love so strong to get to the point of, take a grenade, jump in front of a moving train, put your hands on a sword... in summary, sacrifice yourself for your loved one. I feel a love like that for singing, not for a person, every now and then I take some lessons, but I've never performed on stage, and I don't think I would ever be able to, as much as I wish. I love to hum when I read. Yes, I also love to read, especially psychology books. But tonight was different. Instead of starting one of the novels I bought at the bookstore today, my friends literally dragged me to the disco and... I'll be honest... it was not only the first but also the last time I'll set foot in such places... it's not my cup of tea I've always been a person who doesn't like these kinds of entertainment. For me, leisure is reading, on the comfortable bed in my room, singing outloud when I'm alone, taking walks on the hill behind my house, or... going to the theater!! We have one of the most renowned theaters in the nation in town, the Moon Theater! Actually my passion for singing was born right there! Before that.. I didn't have a real dream and I was desperate because I wanted to find one!

I went to the show that Mr. Buster put on after the fall of his theater and from the very first performance, in which Mrs. Rosita and Gunter danced and sang to Taylor Swift's "Shake it up", to the last performance, in which Meena, I love her voice, sang "don't worry about a thing" by Tori Kelly, Johnny's performance too, where he sang "I'm still standing" by Elton John, i admit i had a big crush on him for a few months.. In summary, my life has changed since then, and I still go there often... that place has something magical about it... it's a land of wonders.. now that I think about it, they staged a show on 'Alice in Wonderland' too! That's one of my favorite shows. I really should go there, these days, who knows what show will be scheduled... I get lost in thoughts, remembering the shows I went to watch in the last period, while I take one of my friends to her house, who is completely drunk, then, a paper sheet stuck to my face. I take it, seeing that it's a flyer for auditions... FOR THE MOON THEATER!!!! Either there is someone spying on me... or finally the wind is blowing in the right direction.. Okay. Maybe tonight didn't was the best of my life..but what if it was fate?

BUT.. THE AUDITION IS TOMORROW I HAVE TO HURRY!!

I hurry to take my friend house and, at the speed of light, I comeback home then I spend all night looking for the right song for tomorrow's audition and.. after evaluating about 1294 songs... yes.. exactly .. I opted for the usual, 'Grenade'. I realize it's 4 in the morning, I panic, and I immediately go to sleep, I have to collect these 5 hours of sleep or at least I'll try. I just hope I don't panic or shy on that...big, huge, stage...help. I noticed that Mr. Moon won't be there, this audition was launched by his nephew, Namjoon, I've seen him in the past, at the theater, a few times, but I've never spoken to him.. I hope he has inherited his uncle's dreamy and positive vibe. In my heart, I feel that something beautiful, really beautiful is about to happen.

Namjoon's pov

I wake up with the sound of uncle Buster's alarm clock, I set it at 6 so I would have 3 hours to organize everything better. With Miss Crawly we check the stage, the lights, the props, clean up the entrance and even uncle Eddie came to help us! I call him uncle, but he's practically uncle Buster's best friend and the nephew of the great Nana Noodleman, who financed the theater when the building completely collapsed. Full of anxiety, I run to the office to double-check the script and when the time comes, I see people approaching the entrance, leaflet in hand. I'm so excited but at the same time.. scared. A few minutes before the entrance opens, I decide to go through a sort of "secret passage": It is located in the part of the ceiling above the stage, uncle Buster always brought me here when I was little, other times I used to come here alone, to have a sort of "VIP seat" and better follow the show. My uncle, every time he has to start the shows, comes here, sits on the fake moon and then he slides down... what an entrance, right? I think I'll adopt it too, maybe it will become the signature of the Moon family hehe. I go down to the grandstand and as soon as 9.30 am I immediately ask Miss Crawly to open the doors. There are almost 200 people .. wow. I didn't expect to attract so much attention, but as I said before, my surname and the name of the theater helped me. However my goal is to create my own name, not to live in the shadow of uncle Buster and the Moon Theater.

I breathe a sigh of relief and welcome the candidates one by one.

'Hello creatures great and small, welcome to Moon Theater, I am Namjoon Moon and I am ready to show you new shades of the magic of this wonderful theater! And I want to do it... with your help!'

I tried to be as convincing as possible. Now let's start the auditions. Some performances were good but... not suitable for my show.. others were perfect: A couple who duet 'Shallow' by Lady Gaga and Bradley Cooper... wow what chemistry, what chemistry.. she has a sweet and strong voice, just like Lady Gaga's, incredible, he has a very low voice, very sensual...I like it; Another couple, he rapper and dancer accompanied by another girl, only dancer, on the notes of an unreleased song, 'more'...wow... they have a great complicity too. She literally seems to burn for him, I bet the whole theater, that those two aren't "just colleagues" as they said in their presentation, he has a bit hoarse voice, the perfect voice for a rapper, moreover, he manages to change his flow in a second, finally here we can talk about full-blown Rapper. Together, they'll set audiences on fire, I'm sure;

A guy, another rapper, brought his unreleased track called 'Daechwita'...HE RAPS BETTER THAN EMINEM. Wow wow wow I'm getting excited, another rapper with all the skills, who manages to insert a certain sensuality even in a song that has a completely different topic. And finally, three other boys, with different but beautiful voices, who respectively brought, An unpublished track, 'Abyss', this boy's voice is high, but not too much, sweet and ringing, 'Snowman' by Sia, the other's voice is almost feminine, but for me it's not an insult, on the contrary, I admire his voice, it manages to reach such high notes that it's enviable even by the best singer in the world..and 'falling' by Harry Styles, this boy has a particular voice, I don't know how to describe it, but he reminds me so much of Johnny, he's a born singer, you can see it in his face.

In the evening, I marked the names of those six boys and two girls in my diary. I have found some real talented people, however.. I feel that something is still missing.. I don't know.. 

As I'm about to close the entrance, I see a girl running towards me. "SORRY SORRY SORRY!! I WAS VERY LATE YOU MUST FORGIVE ME! Is there still time for another audition?" I can't tell her no, just because she could be the 'thing' that is missing in my show. 

Y/n's pov: 

Mr. Namjoon, oh my..calling him mr. seems a bit of an exaggeration since we probably have a few years difference between us, anyway, he was very kind to let me do the audition, just like I thought,  at the end, he is Buster Moon's nephew. This morning I didn't hear the alarm and I continued to sleep peacefully until 5 this afternoon.. I'm mortified.. it seems like fate wanted it to go this way. This feeling of being on a real stage is strange.. but at the same time I'm scared.. so scared 

'Whenever you want! Y/n! I'll start the base'

I can already hear the start of the song but I feel almost paralyzed.. 

'I-I..'

I can't even speak.. Namjoon shuts down the music, gets on stage, and approaches me, putting a hand on my shoulder.

'I know someone who started out like you, and now she's on tour and she's the best singer in my uncle's crew, I assume you know Meena, don't you?'

I nod. She is my idol .. and I didn't know that she was scared, like me, at the beginning... 

'My uncle encouraged her to sing by saying a line which souynds like his 'motto', "Don't let the fear stop you from doing what you love most." 

So now, even if you're a little scared, let it go away and sing, you will feel good.. then.. it's a love song, right? You will definitely have a boyfriend, so think about him, and let your feelings go free, they will sing with you.'

 Wow, Namjoon looks so much like his uncle in this aspect. I'll follow his advise. Although..I haven't a boyfriend.. but... I'll let myself go...let's get it!

Before starting to sing I turn my gaze to Namjoon, he has a beautiful smile on his face, which calms me down, he also has dimples, how cute~ I heard the base and.... Here I am, singing, without thinking about it, and, incredibly, during the chorus, the only person that comes to my mind is.... Namjoon.. Him? A boy that i just met few minutes ago? Crazy stuff... but... okay, I'm in the theater where anything is possible, so, it's okay.

" Yes, I would die for ya, baby But will you do the same?"

My head decided to change the lyrics, without my permission. I connect with the real world again and I see Namjoon and his secretary standing, clapping, I hear more applause coming from behind the scenes, where I see a group of people smile at me. 

'Well! Smile Y/n Y/s! Even your colleagues were amazed by your voice!' 

Colleagues? Does this mean...THEY GOT ME? AM I SERIOUSLY IN??!!!?!?!? I smile, beaming more than ever , also looking at my new colleagues. All thanks to Namjoon. I can't wait to work with him... ah and of course with the others too... 

Our leader, as it got late,sent us home, saying that rehearsals would start early the next morning, repeating us to not to be late.. I feel particularly involved, hearing that sentence.. As soon as we left the theater we decide to spend the evening, eating out to get to know each other better. Everyone is so nice. There are ten of us in Nam's crew, including him, who obviously is a rapper, although I haven't had the opportunity to hear him yet: There are Seokjin, Taehyung, Jungkook and Jimin who have the role of singers, and I am among those , along with a certain girl whose nickname is Luv, she seems very nice and knows her stuff, she showed us a part of 'Blank space' by Taylor swift and I love her tone of voice. Furthermore Jungkook and Jimin are also dancers, Taehyung is a good dancer too, but Namjoon decided to give him only the role of singer. Then there's Yoongi, Hoseok and Angie, the other girl, who is, as I understood, Hoseok's girlfriend, or at least, they claim they're just colleagues, but in my opinion they're either hiding something from us, or they're together without even realizing it... Yoongi and Hoseok are rappers and the latter is also a dancer, together with Angie. We make quite a good gang. I haven't had such a nice evening in quite a while. I rushed to sleep, eagerly awaiting the morning. That morning which actually arrived right away. This time I woke up on time and immediately run to the theater where Hoseok, Angie, Taehyung and Luv are already waiting, the others are probably arriving. At 9 Namjoon and Miss Crawly welcome us into the theater and take us to the rehearsal room. There are different rooms to rehearse, one for dance, one for singing, one for rap and many others! I feel like I'm living a real dream! After we settle in, Namjoon makes us gather on stage and announces that first he would let us stage a provisional show and then he would reveal the real show with which we will really debut... such a mysterious boy.. The others are a little perplexed, but something tells me that I have to trust him, I'm sure he has something great in store for us! And he'll have his reasons for keeping it all from us, for now.

timelapse  

About 2 months have passed since then, we have bonded a lot among us  and Namjoon has also proved to be more present than expected, especially with me. We get on quite well together, to tell the truth, I think I'm falling in love with him.. but I feel that, for him, I'm just a person to admire.. it hurts, but that's okay.. maybe time will open Namjoon's eyes. For now, in his heart, there is only room for the show that he dreams to take on stage. The day of the provisional show arrives, obviously not public, but  the show will be attended by Miss crawly, Nana Noodleman and her nephew Eddie ... I admire Nana .. but ... that lady scares me a lot .. 

From behind the scenes, I see Namjoon, standing on the fake wooden moon, on which Mr. Buster always climbs for opening his shows. 

'All creatures great and small...' 

Namjoon's pov:

As I recite the opening of the show, I am very nervous. In these months, I haven't been able to say anything about the real show to my crew.. mostly because, I hate to admit it, but I'm scared abou that too . I'm scared of their opinion, that they might disagree.. here's what I didn't inherit from uncle Buster , his leadership.. his ability to keep the attention and the authority, while remaining the cute koala  he actually is, remaining professional.. he just convinced Ash to sing 'Call me maybe'!!! 

I'm afraid to show my songs to the public.. So, I put this show on the spot, to prove to the others, but mostly to myself, that I can do it. As soon as the presentation is over, the show begins.. I will have to perform last, with Y/n, I admire that girl a lot, she has a wonderful voice, and she is so kind, but when she wants, she can also be tough, I'll be honest . I noticed that we have many things in common, she also likes reading and walking in nature and above all she discovered her dream thanks to the Moon Theater too. I admit I've developed pretty strong feelings for her, but I have to take them apart, we're colleagues, we can't be anything else.

I just admire her. 

The show seems to go smooth as butter, I also included some of my unreleased stuff, like 'Jamais vu' that Hoseok, Jungkook and Seokjin will sing, 'Friends' that Jimin and Taehyung will sing, since they told me they've known each other since elementary school , for Yoongi , honestly, I gave him all the freedom he needs, he told me that his dream is to become a composer, so I decided to let him use another unpublished work of his, 'people'; For the girls, I gave them already famous songs. I don't know... there were some songs in which I saw them more, compared to my unreleased ones. For Luv I opted for Katy Perry's 'ET'; for Angie, I decided to make her dance on Shakira's 'Whenever, wherever'; For Y/n, I assigned her 'Rolling in the Deep' by Adele, a sort of remix, in which i added a rap part written by myself. During my performance with Y/n...it was a bit tense but..everything seemed to be going well even if, I'll be honest, there's something wrong..I hope it's just my imagination. After the show, the boys ran, exhausted, behind the scenes. I'm about to reach them when I hear my name being called. I turn around and see Nana asking me to go over her.. I have a weird feeling.. 

Y/n's Pov: 

The show went pretty well. My fear didn't stop me, and that's very reassuring, although, I admit, taht during the duet with Namjoon, I thought about the fact that he probably doesn't prove the same things as mines... which spoiled the mood. I tried to keep everything hidden, but I'm afraid that I failed... who knows what Nana thinks of our chemstry, will she consider it up to Buster Moon's crew's? At one point, as soon as we see Miss Crawly take Nana to her limousine, we catch Namjoon join us behind the scenes, with a look.. a bit gloomy. 

'hey Nam!! Is everything okay?'

 Taehyung asks. 

'What happened?' 

asks Yoongi.

 'Did Nana say something bad?' 

Jungkook asks 

'Did Miss Crawly lost her eye again?' 

Angie's usual way to resolve the situation.. 

' guys, let him explain. Boss, what's going on?'

 Luv silences everyone, giving Namjoon space to speak. 

'Guys, I don't know if we can perform the show..' 

Namjoon lowers his head.. I don't understand.. 

'WHAT?!'

I shut my mouth, realizing I've screamed. 

'yeah.. Nana called me aside because she wanted to see the real show I had in mind. I showed her the storyline and everything and she said that the audience probably won't like it.. and I'm not cut out for this role.. I'm sorry guys.. I know I shouldn't listen to her.. She could definitely be wrong, but..' 

Namjoon can't finish the sentence, his voice shaking.. how I feel bad for him.. he can't give up.. not at the first difficulty. I see Nam rushing upstairs to his office, leaving us all speechless and confused. 

'Y/N, you should go..' 

I hear Seokjin's voice telling me to go to Namjoon. 

'Me?'

I answer even more confused. 

'It's evident that Namjoon gets along better with you, maybe you will be able to understand what happened and to convince him to don't give up' 

So...to the others' eyes Namjoon and i have a sort of connection... I hate seeing him like this, during the rehearsals he was full of positivity but at the same time quiter than his uncle. He has a dream and he can't let it go like this. All right. I'll go talk to him. I nod to the others and run upstairs. 

Namjoon's pov;

Nana's words occupy my head. 

Flashback

'I'm sorry Namjoon, but I think you're not cut out for that.. Theater is more, romantic, more, magical, it's not hip hop, or whatever.. I appreciate this little show you put on here, but you won't go far if you continue like this, I don't think this is what your uncle taught you.. Then you see that there is a sort of tension among you and your crew, you should have faith in them, so that they will have it in you. .' 

End Flashback

Those words reverberate in my head like a drum... I ran away from the guys too, they'll think I'm a loser, that they trusted the wrong person and indeed, now they're all probably already at home.. Nana said it, they don't trust me.. 

'Namjoon'

 A familiar voice takes me out of this hurricane of thoughts. 

'Y/n.. I thought you were back home..'

'I would never move from here, even if the building were collapsing again, like in the past..'

Y/n sits next to me. 

'Tell me what happened and what Nana exactly told you'

 Y/n always manages to calm me down, with her slightly low but sweet voice, for a few seconds, my thoughts disappear. So I decide to tell her everything... 

'But Nam!! You don't have to listen to her! Do you realize that you could bring about a revolution in the theater?? A bit like Goldoni did it with the Venetian theater!!!!'

'Y/n! Do you understand that... I.. I'M SCARED'

I almost yell at her without realizing it, I can feel something wet coming down my cheeks.. Am I crying? Really? Is Namjoon Moon seriously crying? Y/n puts a hand on my head, bringing it to her shoulder. 

'It's normal to be afraid, boss. But, as you told me that time, when I looked like a lost, scared animal, on that stage below, "don't let fear stop you from doing what you love most". If the show goes badly.. Never mind. We will try again! But think if it will go well, if you are successful, your dream will come true and... I will be happy to be part of it. And then.. there's a crazy chemistry among all of us, you've always been there, with Miss Crawly, together with us, supporting us like never before in these two months.. Do you remember when I didn't want to try that high note in Ariana Grande's 'Problem'? I was just trying it with you and we stayed until the next morning trying it. Or when Seokjin and Taehyung had a fight over that cup of ramen?...you rolled up your sleeves and made them reconcile, or when Hoseok thought he couldn't make that pas de deux with Angie because they'd never tried to dance on a slow song like 'in the name of love'? When, with a lot of patience, you taught Jungkook to play the piano, just because you wanted so much to make him sing 'I'm still standing'? You tested all of us. And we trusted you blindly. 

You understand it? We are here with you. And then there's one thing you have to give up..being liked by everyone. Remember that nothing and no one has ever succeeded in pleasing everyone. You may prefer some musical genres to others and you preferred the nine of us to other artists, during the audition, who will have been as good as me or Luv or Seokjin or Yoongi or others in the crew. It's Okay, Namjoon. We are doing something we love. Let's not care about the opinion of others, we are talking about dreams, something that goes far beyond a simple opinion of others. Look around.. This theater, this wonderland has always helped us. Even Mr. Buster, your uncle, has always been close to us, still during the tour. And then.. there's a phrase that Mr. Buster has always repeated loudly.. "When you hit rock bottom, do you know what the most beautiful thing is? It's that the only direction you can go is... up"..so Namjoon Moon, you are not like your uncle, and trust me, you are perfect just the way you are, and you are a fantastic leader, even if you don't notice it..my lead-em..our leader'

 Y/n is right, she is right in everything she said.. We are talking about dreams, not opinions.. I tested all the crew and they passed it.. now that I am put under the test.. I have almost failed. Yes... almost.. because now.. we're going up. Up to the moon. I have my crew, I have Y/n and there is also my uncle and the others supporting me...

I have decided. I have to put this show on stage and it's going to be AMAZING. I look at Y/n and smile at her. God how grateful I am to her.. what if I hadn't allowed her to audition?... where would I end up now? I don't know, nor do I want to know, from now on, one only looks straight ahead. I hug her tightly.  She doesn't hesitate to hug me back and, I feel like she's sobbing... she's crying too.. I feel a strange feeling in my heart.. but for now I can't give it weight. I smile at her and only after being reciprocated, I take her hand, that delicate little hand, and we immediately run downstairs. As I go down the stairs I see all the boys surprised, but I can feel a certain happiness in their eyes. Their gazes are spreading.. relief? I don't know, but this makes me relieved too. They are my first real best friends, almost my second family, even though we know each other from few months, I feel there was a reason why I chose them that day. In front of me, in front of us, I can already see a future brighter than the sun. There will be obstacles.. but hey, where's the fun otherwise? 

'Well guys, sorry for what happened earlier. I'm ready to tell you everything and above all, today.. I'll tell you know about the show that will take us to the top.'

 All my crew smiles at me, Nana has already made a mistake about this, there is something magical among us. After making the guys sit in the stands, I go on stage, starting to tell a sort of presentation on which I have been working on for the past 2 months: 

The show will be called "The most beautiful moment in life" And it will talk about the story of a group of friends, a boyband, which will be us 7, Seokjin, Yoongi, Hoseok, Jimin, Taehyung and Jungkook and me, Namjoon. They will debut with a song "No more dream" and, after several songs, they will reach a point in their career, where, they will lose themselves and decide to think about their solo works, to find what they had lost, they will release a song as a " ""goodbye""": 'Yet to come'. During their solo projects, three of them will find their twin flame, Hoseok will find a fan, Angie, from another nation, younger than him, but a sort of harmony will born between them that will set everything on fire ...thanks to Angie, Tae will come introduced to Luv, a friend, who will become Tae's twin flame, even if Tae is initially uncertain about his feelings.

And then, there is Namjoon, who finds.. Y/n... with her, he will be able to find his way.. The group will come back fully united and, in the end, there will be the grand finale, where they will all sing together 'For youth', as a love song for their fans, because after all Hoseok and Tae have found love among them, stating that, they will continue to sing for a long, long time to come.' 

Before speaking again, I catch my breath, addressing my friends, my crew.. I explained everything... putting my soul into it, as if the show had come to life in my head while I was telling it.. I admit I didn't explain all like this to nana.. i'm very tense.. this is literally the show i've been working on for all my life, this is the business card of the most important dream of my life.. i'm afraid of what they might think, what the public will think, what uncle Buster will think.. I'm afraid to express my weak point, but fear won't stop me. I'll make my dream come true...or die trying. 

'so.. What do you guys think?'

 I say, in a surprisingly confident voice. After a few seconds, I hear a clap. I look closely at the origin of the sound and I see her, Y/N.. I can see her hands becoming red from clapping so much and observing her closely.. she has tears in her eyes... 

Y/n's pov: 

I can't help but applause, Namjoon only showed us an outline of the show.. yet here I am, with red hands, still clapping and with tears in my eyes.. I think I understood what "reduced" me like this: The feeling with which Namjoon laid out these four lines of plot. His eyes sparkled, as if he were showing his greatest treasure. He brought it all out... and I feel so lucky to be one of the first people he did that to. 

'READY TO SOLD OUT AROUND THE GLOBE MR JOON?'

 I scream without even thinking about it, and soon after, I see Namjoon with tears in his eyes, for the second time today, but those are different tears, he is happy. I turn to the others and they are moved too, intent on applauding and rooting for our leader. I can't wait to start rehearsals for this masterpiece...and to be honest, I'm really happy to be Namjoon's twin flame, at least in this show, the most important project of his life? WHY DID HE CHOOSE ME? Aish.. I don't know, but... I love him, I love him to death. Now I'm starting to really understand what Bruno wanted to say through "Greande". 

Timelapse

Another 4 months have passed since then. We've been working hard every single day, and the debut of 'The most beautiful moment in life' is in two days. There's a lot of anxiety in the air, you can almost touch it, but at the same time, we're all excited. The general rehearsal started yesterday. In the end we decided to insert a choreography for all the songs of the "bangtan boys", the name of the boyband, so Namjoon, Seokjin and Yoongi went started dance lessons, the choreographer of the Mr. Moon's crew also helped us, Nooshy, although she could help just a little, since she is on tour with his crew, but with several video calls we managed to compensate. Then we have some ACEs here, Angie and Hoseok, who, personally... are scary when they have to play dance teachers.. Luv and I are saved, we will also have some steps in our duets, but nothing too difficult. Speaking of Mr. Buster, as soon as we told him the date of the premiere, he immediately moved the date of his show to that evening, in order to be free to see his nephew's debut. I'm so euphoric I can't stand still aaah. Ah and about the relationship between me and Namjoon? Well... nothing new, we just seem like best friends, and I don't have the slightest intention of confess my feelings.. just being with him is enough for me, so I've kept my feelings a little apart, at least for now. 

'Anxious?'

Angie interrupts my thoughts. 

'Well.. you don't?'

 I add, laughing. 

'Okay okay you're right Y/n. And.. tell me... there are rumors that you will confess to Namjoon during your duet, I hope they are true!! Now Miss Crawly too ships you two!!'

Angie comes up to me giving me a little nudge and a mischievous smile.. BUT WHO HAS SPILLED THIS RUMOR?

'Are you kidding?????? But I would never think of confess to him in that situation!! Whoever put up this voice got screwed up.'

I reply, but I already know I'm blushing, Angie's giggle is proving me that. 

'Mh okay... but what if it will be Namjoon who will confess his feelings for you, instead? What would you do then?' ...actually I had never analyzed this option.. But... naaah 

'Don't worry too much, it won't happen, Namjoon only feels admiration for me, at least that's how he made me understand..'

 I say with a slightly despondent voice, lowering my head . 

'And let me understand.. do you think two lovers can't feel admiration for each other? In my opinion, loving someone also means being a fan of your loved one, I could be wrong.. but my instinct tells me that I'm more right than you think hehe'

 Angie winks at me, then goes back to practice.. she's not entirely wrong .. maybe it's my greatest wish, to be Namjoon's lover.. who knows... 

'Y/n!!! We have to try 'Love'!! Run!!!'

 You speak of the devil... here he is calling me haha I better go.. 

' I'm Coming.. Nam!!!!' 

Timelapse 

Namjoon's pov: 

It's the day of the show and to my immense surprise.. we did a sold out... There is not a single empty seat out there.. And there are also journalists, critics.. All here for my show... 

'So.. guys! Come here'

We'll all get in a circle. 

'It's the big day... let's go out there... and show them who we are.'

 'YES!'

They all answer in chorus.. my gaze obviously goes to Y/n, you can see she's as anxious as I am, but I know what she's thinking: "Let's do it", so let's really do it. Through the usual path, I hold on to the fake moon and signal to uncle Eddie to start the special effects.. Let the show begin.. 

'Creatures great and small!!!! It is a pleasure tonight, having you here with us, Today.. you will be witnesses, of a revolution. Today... I'm going to tell you a story... which... starts like this...'

 Author's pov: 

With the lights off, 'The most beautiful moment" in life begins: 7 guys, who have already reached their twenty years old, who still can be considered teenagers. All brought together by their passion for music, but there is also something else that unites them, the question ... "What is my dream?" What's your dream?...' 

You can already hear the voices of the journalists, the audience taken by that hip hop rhythm, by the coordinated steps, by the voices of those seven guys.. that no one would have ever imagined seeing climbing the highest peaks of the world. And if you don't believe me.. keep watching, how mankind itself has evolved over the centuries, how a caterpillar turns into a butterfly... these guys have changed, passing from the hip hop of 'No more dream', 'We are bulletproof', 'N.O', 'Boy in luv', 'Danger'; To the sweetest and most melancholic notes of 'I need u' and 'Run'; To the energy of 'Fire' and 'not today'; To the sensuality of 'Blood, sweat and tears ';

To the fairy love of 'DNA' and the strength of 'Mic Drop', the unhappy love of 'Fake love', the redemption of 'Idol'; To the genuine love of 'Boy with luv'; To the poetics of 'On' and 'Black swan'; To the sweetness of 'Life goes on'; Up to the freshness of the singles 'Dynamite', 'Butter' and 'Permission to Dance'; And then? And then... here they are... When you are in a group.. sometimes you can lose yourself.. so. The seven stars have decided to put an end to the first chapter of their career with 'Yet to come'..

 'You and I, the best moment is yet to come..'

 And start a second one.. From which...they will come out many surprises. The dancer, the bearer of hope, met a fan of his, spoke a different language than his, or so it seemed, and had two hopeful green eyes.. he didn't necessarily need her, yet his eyes saw her not as a fan , but something more.. She had kindled a flame in him.. it was up to him whether to put it out or feed it... 

'Equality is you and me..'

If the flame of love burned on one side, the one of doubt was next to it, a singer, with a voice so low, almost chilling, who fortunately, or unfortunately, found himself together with his dancer friend, when the fateful encounter took place, the green-eyed girl had a friend with her, with sea-colored eyes, in which the singer was almost shipwrecked .. It almost seemed like a dream .. but the boy with the frozen voice could not give in, perhaps out of fear, out of cowardice, out of disbelief, he wanted to let her go but ... 

'Never mind, I' I'll find Someone like you..'

No one would ever be like her.. so the boy relented. And he did not regret it. Three boys find their Beatrice. 

Well, I'm about to tell you about the Third, perhaps the one who least expected a gift like this from life. The rapper, the leader, walking down that country road, starts humming an almost improvised song, but his singing gets a response. Another girl there, humming with him, for him. in love they could try each other.. But... there was something.. he still didn't know, that love that was blossoming in him, for that girl, who sang with him.. 

'Is this love, yeah Is this love, yeah Sometimes I know, yeah Sometimes I don't, yeah'

Namjoon's pov: 

Wait... I have Y/n right here in front of me... I wrote this script before I even knew her.. I .. I've done everything without thinking about it until now... now that my mind is free.. now that all this is about to end.. I have her in front of me, this woman, the woman who has never stopped supporting me , to stand by me.. the woman who.. without realizing it... I seriously loved and that I'm loving even more, now that I'm aware of it. Fuck the royalties, admiration and all... I love her.. 

Y/n's pov:

I hear the music finish... I sang with Namjoon for the umpteenth time, yet today was different- I feel.. something soft on my... lips... wait... N-Namjoon? Is Namjoon kissing me? Yes... he's doing it.. and I'm kissing him back?... My body no longer responds to my mind.. I feel like I'm lost in a limbo, as if time has stopped... it's such a beautiful feeling...Did he do it for the scene? We've never talked about kissing...was it out of enthusiasm? Possible... but... I feel something special, as if with these kisses he is trying to tell me something.. When the curtain is about to cover us, I can clearly see an "I love you", mimicked from Namjoon... I smile at him miming "me too". We don't have enough time to talk.. We have to sing 'For Youth'... Throughout the song we kept exchanging glances and smiling at each other... I don't know what happened to him.. but I'm glad he opened his eyes. I am happy that this wish of mine has been fulfilled. But...wait! Did that crackhead Angie know something? Who knows... she's Cupid's descendant there... apparently. After the show, I thought too much on me and Namjoon, when I realize that, in front of my eyes, in our... eyes, there is the loudest audience: Who applauds, who cries, who laughs, who smiles, who screams... And... there's also Mr. Buster and his crew in the audience.. Nana, all the critics, my family... They're all there.. To frame this magical moment.

My gaze can only go towards the others, all moved, and on Namjoon, my Namjoon, on his knees, moved more than all. 

Namjoon's pov:

 There was my uncle there in front of me, my idol, the others, the delirious audience, Nana winking at me, that sheep, she had done it on purpose to tell me those things.. 

' YOU WERE GREAT MY NEPHEW!!'

uncle's screams could only increase that idyllic feeling I was already feeling, my gaze then falls on Y/n, who already was looking at me, smiling, that wonderful smile... We stood there applauding for more than 10 minutes to then go backstage and of course the first thing I did was hug my sweet Y/n. 

'You did it' 

She says smiling even more. I dry her tears. 

'We did it together, all of us' 

I add, before giving her a kiss. 

'GROUP HUG' 

I hear Jungkook's screams and then everyone else all over me and Y/n. Miss Crawly was there too!!! And then... I see my uncle coming towards me, smiling like never before. 

'I'm so proud of you, Namjoon'

 I smile at him.. 

'It's all thanks to you, uncle, and...to my crew' 

I hug Uncle Buster, a little harder than other times. Then I see some dudes coming towards me. 

'These gentlemens want to offer you a contract... my dear nephew, apparently this is just the beginning.. this show will remain on everyone's lips for a loooong time' 

I turn abruptly towards the others, we all look at each other with wide eyes.. 

'So what? Are we going to climb this peak?' 

'OBVIOUS' 

they yell in chorus, my guys. Y/n runs again to hug me.. 

Alright, I was right.. something beautiful, really beautiful.... it really happened.. But.. The most beautiful moment.. is yet to come.

Author's Note

so... i decided to translate from italian to english all the one shots i wrote and the ones i'll write in future! Hope that this one helped you to have faith on your dreams and to never give up!

[starjxsung]

HAI STAR I AM BACK FROM EUROPE !!! I got home like two hours ago :3 feels SO good to be back in my own room in my own bed - showered, have laundry going, AND I UNBOXED MY LIMITED EDITION ATE ALBUM I BOUGHT IN COPENHAGEN (posted a pic on tumblr if ya wanna check it out hehe) ... work and school emails can wait until tmrw... RAHHH it's been so long lemme go through your last few responses to my messages since last time I responded Summer if FLYINGGG wahhh I can't believe I start school in a month! I've seen bits and pieces of what you've said about ATEEZ and Lolla and they both sound RAHHHHH I'm so glad you had fun and meet up with your older sister (for ATEEZ) (though the sunburn does NOT sound fun) and I'm glad you were able to stay safe (?) and be responsible and help that girl out (at Lolla) As for South Africa guy... So basically once I went on the trip we didn't talk cause he was on his trip and I was on mine but I did send him a long ass message about what was going on in my brain (after confirming that he would be okay and welcoming to that sort of messages since we couldn't talk it out at the time) and explaining to him how hurt I really was? but like in a respectful and calm manner. Idk it was longggggg mostly cause I over(?)think or like have many thoughts because while I did want to explain that I was hurt, I also wanted to make it clear that I saw where he was coming from and wasn't telling him to hurt him or make him feel bad if that makes sense. Anyways, seeing as I JUST got back and he just got back a few days ago (with covid nonetheless), we have yet to talk about it and he has yet to respond to my long ass message. (also for background info in case I forgot to tell you, yes we did end up talking about where our relationship is a little bit ago before this whole ghosting thing happened and bascially we ended up with "committed relationship w/o lables" because apparently I have baggage (anxiety) attached to the term "girlfriend" from my last relationship LOL hahaha but yeah so basically agreeing to be "committed" and then this happening kinda just made it feel a lot worse aslkjdf) anyways what im left with now is feelings of residual hurt, uncertainty, and genuninely questioning how comfy I am in this relationship now... but I shall wait until we actually properly talk about it hahaha... also... did you actually raw dog your flights... how do you do that omg I will like do that for periods of time but usually I have music going for most of it... (today during my flight from Amsterdam (layover) to where I live I watched one of my fav comfort movies three times in a row (it's Zootopia LMAO)) Europe Trip stuff: my fave part was def the guided, all inclusive tour we did of Norway country side form Voss to Bergen - it was hiking, biking, and kayaking! I died physically (i mean like one of the days was 61 km of biking... and we were doing stuff for 6 days) BUT EVERYTHING WAS SO PRETTY AND THE WEATHER WORKED OUT AMAZINGLY usually its rainy and dreary and cloudy (like where I live - honestly norway looks like exactly where I live) but it was SUNNY the WHOLE time!! I got to swim in the fjords and go fishing (I LOVE fishing...) and just take in all the nature as I hiked and biked etc... and my younger brothers and I made some friends with another family on the tour (there were four other families in total) - this family had three boys - two 17 y/o twins and a 14 y/o - they were so much fun tbh LOL the 14 y/o was very mature tho (maybe more than his brothers tbh) I thought he was like 17 when I first met him and thought his brothers were like 20 LMAO they're all tall- anyways, the 14 y/o, he thought I was like 15 when we first met (I think he developed a crush on me ngl by the end of the tour lol) anyways ya it was fun !!! sorry for the LONGGG life update... HOW ARE YOU DOING STARRR

ily always 💕🫶💖 🌱

RAHHHHHH MY ANGELLLLL I’VE MISSED YOU SOOOOO MUCH IM SO SORRY FOR NOT BEING ON HERE IN A MILLION YEARS I swear time has just moved so weird ever since lolla I still feel like I came back yesterday????? WTAF…… ANYWAYS!!! EUROPE!!!!! AND SCHOOL!!!!! HOW WAS EUROPE and how is school going (I’m assuming you started again???) I hope it’s going so well!!!!! I’ve been crazy busy at work it’s insane, I swear the work is just nonnnnnstop it’s making me want to die 😭 what’s crazy is that I started this blog bc I always had so much free time and now I can barely stay online bc I always have some shit going on at work it’s so frustrating RAHHHH

Ugh. I can’t believe all the confusion??? With South Africa guy????? First of all I totally understand your hesitation for an “official title” bc shitty relationships will definitely do that to you 🧍‍♀️but his communication fr seems so spotty 😭 anyways I’m assuming he responded to the message by now (I’d be scared if he didn’t????) but I hope there’s some form of resolution there? I mean he sounds like a catch and I’m so glad you guys get along well and seem to have mutual feelings for each other but it really sucks when that’s the case and then it just quickly turns into a guy completely wasting your time 😕 waiting for more updates but I just don’t want you to end up getting hurt by all of this!! I’ll beat his ass frfr

AHHHH THAT SOUNDS LIKE SO MUCH FUN I would’ve been dying from all the physical activity too I don’t blame you LMAO 😭 I’m so glad you met so many cool people (and even had someone develop a lil crushy crush on you HAHAHA) but that sounds amazing!!! Also how was the kpop store there??? I hope it was everything you dreamt of AAAAA it’s so much fun to find kpop stuff in places away from home 😭 I haven’t been to a kpop store in months now but I’m aiming to go this Thursday for a FAT shopping trip. Will keep u posted 😋🤞

ANYWAYS I AM GOOD I’ve just been crazy busy and I feel really bad that I’ve been so bad about being on here ???!,!.!.!.! Also working thru Kinktober and my eyes are burning out of my skull from all my screen time but. WORTH IT……

I love you so so so much I need a million more updates so I know all’s still well with you! Sending all my love as USUALLLLL 💓💓💓💓🫶👼

[aquariuminfobureau]

In addition to a history, the aquarium has a bit of an ethnography attached to it. Over in Japan, styles of aquarium keeping can be quite different, owing much to their own traditions of gardening. From 1993 comes The Natural Aquarium, by the authors Satoshi Yoshino and Doshin Kobayashi. I think it is a very good introduction, to how the Japanese design and view the ideal aquarium - by working with nature. (But is that the same thing, as to 'imitate' nature?) in any case this is a TFH volume, and Herbert R. Axelrod claims to have overseen the work.

The table of contents serves as a fine introduction, of the content to expect - inspirational aquascapes and how-to knowledge, often with a geographical theme. Aquariums are themed around the warm climate freshwaters of Central and South America, Asia, and Africa, but not Australia, Madagascar, or New Guinea. Clearly the authors draw parallels between the compositions of music, and of aquariums. So that aquatic plants, form a symphony, and a Brazilian themed aquarium is a musical.

The how-to guides are illustrated with both photographs and line art. The latter explains the live plantings, and other features of the aquascape composition. In this setup, for the housing of discus, the plants helpfully keep the ammonia cycle under control.

For the purposes of 'accuracy' the authors insist that, in an Amazon river themed aquarium, only plants from the Amazon should be used in the aquascape. Yet visually impressive or not, real plants in the Rio Amazonas never, ever grow as in artificial, aesthetically designed aquascapes. That is not the sense in which our aquarium life is natural. They can never be authentically wild.

I am a sucker for the concept of the paludarium. One of the themed setups, features both emersed houseplant and submerged aquarium plant species. Correctly the authors point out that Cryptocoryne grow emersed in the wild for part of the year, and for this reason usually require special care, to thrive if grown permanently submerged.

I succeed with a bottom layer of laterite, followed by a much deeper layer of pond compost, capped with a fine sand. But they do very well with emersed foliage and 'wet feet'. This is after all their proper growth habits. It's just that at that point, they are scarcely aquarium plants anymore.

A different paludarium type setup features some emersed plant life, but the aquascape is heavy on dead wood. Such is intended to simulate a wild mangrove habitat, or it's similar freshwater parallels in which trees also 'grow on stilts'.

I must protest that mudskippers, one of the photographically illustrated species, are animals of mudflats. They would not be suited to a habitat in which the only emersed 'land' is pieces of emersed wood. And they certainly do not swim and dive in deep water by preference.

Japanese gardens do not always feature plant life. In line with the new, Japanese tradition of fishkeeping, drawing from older, Japanese notions in gardening, plants are not a feature in all the underwater gardens.

This aquascape for an aquarium housing fishes from the ancient Lake Tanganyika, in East Africa, utilises rockwork for it's potential inhabitants, principally endemic cichlids of that lake. But a species of killifish is also illustrated, although it is much more rarely traded than are the cichlids and squeakers sharing the said lake.

In all, the Japanese people have mastered the art of the aquascape. However some of the setups in the pages, are truly gardens in that their live plantings, will require a decent degree of maintenance. But what is wrong, exactly, with that?