#i am immediately like ‘i must write a main character with those traits’

[phoenixkaptain]

Tbh every time I see anything that’s like “You should NEVER write this specific thing,” the spirit of C.S. Lewis tells me “you should write that thing right now immediately”

[splonk-fox]

The flaws of Jax and Ragatha, and why they matter to Pomni's character arc.

Within the two episodes of The Amazing Digital Circus that have been released so far as of writing this post, there have been two characters who have been given the most attention and depth out of any of the cast (ignoring Pomni obviously), and those two characters are Ragatha and Jax.

The duo consisting of the kindhearted optimist and the meanspirited pessimist have without a doubt become some of the most interesting characters to analyze within this series so far thanks to how much meaningful screentime and character depth they have been given within the the two episodes that we viewers have been fortunate enough to witness with our very eyes.

But why is this? Why is it that these two have received special attention from the writers so far, and what role do they play in Pomni's character journey? Well I believe I may have found the answer, and it's unfortunately one that does not spell a good future for these characters. But to truly understand where I am coming from, we must first understand who these two characters are and how they relate to our main protagonist.

To start off with the kindest of the duo, we have already learned quite a lot about Ragatha thanks to the two episodes she has been featured in so far.

Her most prominent character trait is without a doubt her kindness. She is the first person to really be genuinely nice to Pomni upon her entrance to the circus and spends the rest of the episode showing her around the place and trying her best to help her get settled in.

She's also someone who doesn't like to be overly blunt with her responses, such is shown when Pomni asks how they leave the circus, to which Ragatha, instead of just saying that she couldn't, phrases it in a way that makes it sound as if they simply haven't found a way to leave yet, this was obviously done in an attempt to not freak Pomni out too much, though this doesn't really go anywhere thanks to Jax.

Now that's great and all, Ragatha's a nice person, you can easily observe that through casual watches of the show, looking deeper however, you can see that there is a lot more going on with Ragatha than she would like to make you believe.

Insecurity is another trait that Ragatha has that, while not shown off as prominently as her optimism, is still very important to Ragatha's character.

As we see in episode 2 of the series, one of Ragatha's biggest fears is not being liked. She vents to Kinger about how she feels like Pomni doesn't really like her that much, and that clearly scares her. And why wouldn't it? The end of episode 2 makes it clear that one of the most important things in this show when it comes to keeping the main cast mentally stable, is their sense of community.

They're all in this together, they have each other's backs and will do their best to be there for each other when it's needed. That is what is communicated to us within the second episode through Kaufmo's funeral.

This segment of the episode, while somber in its tone, is also one that instills hope within Pomni and the viewer. Because it shows that despite everything, the circus members do care about each other. That abstraction is something that affects everyone and it isn't something that is just brushed off immediately, which if you recall, was the crux of Pomni's fears as seen at the beginning of the second episode, the fear of being forgotten, the fear of no one caring.

"I don't even remember her name honestly" - Dream Jax.

So with how the importance of community has been firmly established within this show's messaging at this point, it should be no surprise that Ragatha's biggest fear is not having that community. Of people not liking you, of people hating you. So how does Ragatha solve this?

Repression, that's how. Of all of Ragatha's personality traits her tendency to not display her true feelings towards things are without a doubt the most damaging.

The best example of this is how she reacts to Pomni abandoning her for the exit. The pilot would lead you to believe that she was mad at Pomni for doing this, that she didn't trust her anymore because of this selfish act.

And yet, that's all brushed to the side in the following episode. Ragatha is back to her optimistic self and is saying that everything is fine! That it was completely understandable and that there was no bad blood between them. Yet you can tell that isn't the whole truth, that Ragatha really didn't get over what Pomni had done to her that easily.

Now do I think Ragatha hates Pomni or secretly resents her? No, not really. I do think she's being honest when she says that she doesn't hold anything against her for doing this. But that doesn't mean she wasn't hurt by it. We can see clear as day from the pilot that this did affect her, so why does she act like she doesn't?

Because, from her perspective, her feelings do not matter. The only thing that does is to make sure Pomni is able to adjust, to make sure that everyone is happy, that everyone is still somewhat sane within the circus, and so she compromises her emotions in order to do this. Gooseworx has even said it herself that Ragatha often says things she doesn't necessarily mean in order to ease tensions. She doesn't want to cause conflict, she doesn't want people to fight with each other because she understands how important community is to the members of the circus persisting.

Yet in the midst of all of this, what Ragatha fails to realize is that with how she currently handles things, she is paving the way for her own mental break.

Ragatha, in her attempts to be there for others, has walled herself off from others being there for her. By lying about how she really feels about things, by acting as if she is fine, she is not allowing herself the emotional vulnerability necessary for others to be there for her when she needs it.

The closest thing we have had to this so far is with Kinger, and while having someone she feels comfortable enough to lament her feelings around is a good thing, this is one person, one person who is... not exactly mentally stable, to put it lightly. Is not exactly an end all be all solution to her problems.

Kinger being the only person who Ragatha can rely on is only gonna work for a limited amount of time, the more she represses, the more she hides her true emotions and clear mental instability, the closer she is to meeting a cruel fate, one that no one would be able to save her from because no one even realized there was something wrong with her. For in her pursuit to make everyone else happy, she has sacrificed her own happiness, as a result.

And then there's Jax.

Jax, in a lot of ways, is pretty much the polar opposite of Ragatha. While her leading trait is kindness, Jax's leading trait is being a complete and utter asshole. And while Ragatha is all about answering things in a roundabout way to ease stress, Jax is all about the blunt answers.

This is best shown to us in the pilot when, in the same scene where Ragatha tries to answer Pomni's question of "how do I leave?" in a way that wouldn't stress her out too heavily, Jax goes straight in with the "you can't". Jax is a pessimist, he has accepted that there is no way out, and is simply riding things as they go by.

Jax's leading character trait is all about causing as much chaos as he can for the sake of his own satisfaction. He doesn't care about how others feel, the only thing he cares about is causing as much chaos as possible simply because he can.

Yet that isn't all that's going on with Jax, there's something deeper here, something more complex.

When it comes to the scenes everyone points to when saying that Jax has a lot more going on with him than meets the eye, the scene where he reacts to Kaufmo's funeral is the one everyone looks at with an analytical lens, and that's for a good reason.

For I think this little scene might just tell us a lot more about Jax than we think.

One thing that I've come to notice about Jax's brand of chaos is that it's very reliant on others' reactions. All of the chaos he causes, all of the absurd and awful things he does are for the sake of seeing how others react. From throwing Pomni over the side of a truck and attempting to use her as a human bridge, or literally everything that he does to Gangle, it's all reaction-based, and that made me realize that, despite how selfish and uncaring he acts towards everyone else, community is still the one thing that truly matters most.

He needs the others so that they can react to his hijinx, as they are what give said actions meaning. If he had no crowd to watch as he acts like a shitty person, then he has no reason to do anything. But that is also where Jax's true character flaw comes in, his selfishness.

With how Jax is constantly pushing others around for the sake of his own amusement, Jax is very clearly a self-centered person. He is someone who is in it for himself and no one else. Who cares if others don't like him? Who cares if others despise him? As long as he gets to see funny things happen to people, he is gonna be okay.

But what happens when that method is no longer effective? What happens when the others don't give him the reaction he wants? What happens when he can no longer use chaos as a way to distract from the pointlessness of his reality?

Well, as scary as this may be to think about, Jax won't really have much of anything to fall back on. His cruel actions have wrote him into a corner. No one likes him, that much is obvious. And while Jax seems content with this now? What happens when he is put in the position of needing someone else's help?

Well, then he'll have no one, and it's ironically for the exact opposite reason to Ragatha. Ragatha's problem is that she is constantly repressing her emotions, despite the fact that she has people who care about her, she doesn't open up to them because in her eyes, her feelings are secondary to others'.

Yet Jax is the opposite, he's honest, he is self-centered, and that's also why he is one of the members who are in this most danger.

In a show that seems to be about how important community is and how important it is to stay together and be there for each other? To have a character who is the complete opposite of that. To have someone who doesn't care about others, who won't be there when someone else is hurting. To have someone who is actively making things harder for everyone... that just spells out demise.

Jax's true weakness is that he does not have a community who will be there for him when he needs it, he was never there for others so why should they be there for him? Meaning that when Jax is at the end of his rope, crying out for help, no one will listen, because as cruel as it sounds, most of the members would probably be happy that he's gone.

While this does admittedly rely a bit on speculation, I think what I've stated above might be the true reason for why Jax looked sad for a moment when the other characters were talking about the funerals held for those who have abstracted. Because in that small moment, he realizes he might not get a funeral of his own when he "dies", or if he did, no one would really have anything nice to say about him.

And that fear, that knowing of how the way you've built yourself up by putting others down has lead to everyone hating you, to everyone not having a single good thing to say about you... that is terrifying. And yet he hides it, he walks away, he refuses to attend the funeral because then he will have to be confronted with the uncomfortable reality of the fact that he won't die as someone who was remembered for doing good things.

The only thing he'll be remembered for, is how much everyone hated him. And all of that brings us right back, to Pomni.

I said at the beginning of this post, as well as with the title itself, that Ragatha and Jax matter to Pomni's character arc, but why is this? Sure they're both main characters so obviously they're going to influence her journey going forward, but how exactly does any of this matter to Pomni? It's simple really.

Ragatha and Jax represent two extremes, they represent what happens when you lean too far in one direction. In one case, it is caring too much about others and not caring about yourself, and in the other, it's caring too much about yoursef and not caring about others.

Pomni has already shown traits of both Jax and Ragatha. She has shown an empathetic, kindhearted side as seen in her interactions with Gummigoo, and she has shown a selfish side, as seen when she abandoned Ragatha for the "exit" in the pilot.

Pomni has shown herself to be both selfish and selfless. But what part of her matters more? Simple answer, both. It is important to care about others while also taking time to take care of yourself. Ragatha and Jax show what happens when you forget to do one of these things.

By always taking care of others, you're forgetting to take care of yourself, and by always taking care of yourself, you fail to take care of others. To find a healthy balance is to do both. To be aware of your own mental health while also making sure that others are doing okay too. And this is something that Pomni will need to realize if she is going to make it in the circus.

And this is where Jax and Ragatha become important. I believe these two will show Pomni how important it is to keep a balance of things. To not lean too far in one direction, as if you do, it spells bad news for you either way. And how will this be communicated to her and the audience?

Abstraction.

Think about it. If Ragatha and Jax's harmful practices continue without change and they end up abstracing because of it, that will be a wakeup call to Pomni, it will show her the flaws of being too selfless, and too selfish. Is it an extreme way to communicate such message? Sure, but it's also one that can't be ignored.

We, the audience, and Pomni, would see first hand the consequences of leaning too far in either direction, that if you don't find a balance, you will end up like Jax and Ragatha did.

And that's why I think these two in particular have been given so much screentime and attention these past two episodes. Because they are meant to show us the most extreme versions of Pomni's most prominent character traits.

The ability to care about yourself, and the ability to care about others.

Of course, I might be wrong in this assessment. We are far too early in the show's runtime to truly predict any big events like this. But from a narrative standpoint, I believe this interpretation makes the most sense in the way of showing us the audience, and Pomni, what truly matters. It's not just about you, it's not just about others, it's about both.

Thank you for reading.

[bibliophilesince2003]

Strong Female Characters

Too many times I pick up a new book to read, but I am immediately met with the female protagonist whose personality is "toughness" and/or "meanness." The equivalent is making a "bad boy" character and calling it a personality. Male or female author, anyone could fall victim to this trap.

Skills and tropes are not personality.

Sure, it's easy to mold a character to snap at everyone in an arrogant manner at every dialogue opportunity and call it a day, but the character remains shallow. Especially for your main character, you should have multiple "words" to describe them. This will bring ease to your writing, too.

For example, for one character of mine... I've put down 18 personality traits in her character chart, and I could likely put down more if given enough time.

When I'm met with a "tough" female protagonist, I'm always expecting more details. What sort of people or what kind of environment makes her stiffen, and - this is as equally as important - what sort of people or what kind of environment makes her relaxed? Being "tough" is more about mood than personality, because surroundings could easily change it.

Is she driven or shy? Is she humorous or serious? Is she observant or a free spirit? Is she clumsy or graceful? Is she friendly or cautious?

Notice how I said "or" and separated the two extremes. You cannot have clumsy and graceful... you must pick one side of the spectrum. A person will naturally lean one way or the other.

Some people make the mistake of choosing the other "extreme" to create weaknesses. "She's driven, but she's shy." Being shy is not a weakness... some people are naturally this way, and there are benefits to being shy.

Find weaknesses within the "extreme" you've chosen.

For example, if one is driven... the weakness is impulsiveness. She may get in trouble, or trouble will find her. Being over-zealous is fine... in doses. Let your character make those mistakes to better represent their personality.

If you're struggling, observe the people in your life. Personality will shine through how a person acts, treats others, talks, etc.

Here's what I do... write down multiple personality traits, decide how extroverted/introverted he/she is, and settle on a single word that wraps up his/her whole character, or most of it, to help refer to something simple during the writing process.

And no, that "single word" better not be a skill or trope.

I want complicated female protagonists again, ones that are more than just mood swings or their environment.

[myloveforhergoeson]

i'd love to read some good ol' hockey romance novels but idk where to start lol; would you happen to have any recommendations? (it's totally cool if not!!)

YES OMG ok but something you must understand about me is that all of my book recommendations come exclusively from booktok or instagram so please take this with a grain of salt. i like them dumb, stupid, cliche, and smutty!

i am very new to the hockey romance genre, so i only have two books that i have read as of now to recommend, but i've got three on my to be read list so i can talk about those too <3

the one i just finished is called behind the net by stephanie archer and friend... god... i thought this one was just going to be just like pwp but there was plot and it was good and had me actually shocked something so interesting popped up in this book bc i had expected something completely different. it centers around jamie, a hockey player (goalie) for a fake team called the vancouver storm who trades his life playing for a team in new york to move home and take care of his mother after a series of mental health crises. he's a bit mean, a little arrogant, but he is mostly and above all... say it with me... MISUNDERSTOOD. god i eat this shit up. his counterpart is a young woman named pippa who just got out of a pretty one sided (read: slightly emotionally abusive) relationship with the only guy she'd ever dated. her ex is a pretty famous musician and it's her dream to write and record her own album one day, but after the break up and a little bit of a traumatic experience with her ex and his manager, she's not quite sure that's the right choice for her. she's very sweet, determined, and overall someone i found to be a very interesting character. anyway, she ends up as his assistant, chaos ensues, things happen that i won't spoil, but i enjoyed it very much.

(he calls her songbird a lot and though i do not have the claim on the pet name every time he said it my mind immediately went rames rames rames rames like a dog chasing after a squirrel)

i've got a little journal where i keep track of all the books i'm reading and i gave it a 3/5 stars on quality of writing, 5/5 stars on the strength of the characters, and a 4/5 on the plot. and my own extra rating, 4/5 on the spice scale

also! the author is writing a series that includes other members of the team and some minor characters from the first novel! the next one comes out in a few days and i can't wait to pick it up!

the first book i read out of the hockey romance genre is a book called icebreaker by hannah grace - this one was pretty popular when it came out and many people have many opinions on it. here are my own which are very general because i read it almost a year ago

the summary of the book is a little misleading, the main conflict is supposed to revolve around the captain of a fake college hockey team (nate) and a figure skater (anastasia) who's shooting for olympic gold having to share an ice rink after the one the figure skaters use is put out of commission. long story short, anastasia blames nate, but they're put in a bit of a forced proximity situation that lasts like... five chapters max. the rest is them figuring out their feelings for each other yada yada which is fine and i enjoyed but it was not what i thought the book would mainly be about. so, personal warning there lol. this one is a bit closer to pwp, but both of them have goals they want to accomplish and they help each other through that. i liked stassie a lot and found her to be an interesting character - watching her fall for nate was very sweet and i think i would have enjoyed it even more if i really liked him. he was just kind of mid to me with his only two personality traits being rich and team captain. but also, as a college student myself, i liked the atmosphere of the school they attended, the dynamic between stassie and the other players on the team as she slowly got to know them, and the way both nate and stassie worked to better themselves in order to be with each other!

in my journal i gave the quality of writing 3/5, the strength of the characters a 3/5 and the plot a 2/5 (it would have been 4/5 but i HATED the epilogue. if you read this book do not read the epilogue your life will be so much better without it) and my own special 3/5 on the spice scale

this one is also a series involving the other players on the team! the second book came out a few months ago and i'm planning to read it soon. it's been sitting on my shelf for ages.

i would recommend behind the net over icebreaker, but both were enjoyable to me!

on my hockey romance tbr:

the graham effect by elle kennedy

wildfire by hannah grace

the fake out by stephanie archer

but, i am a well-rounded (romance) reader so if you'd like to know my favs or other books im reading or like reviews just lmk... i'm slowly turning this blog into one where i just share whatever i want instead of it being focused toward my story LOL

[thecurioustale]

(Re)introducing The Curious Tale

As I mentioned last time, I have two main series that I am working on which I'll be doing my introverted best to hype up here on Tumblr sometimes: one fantasy series and one sci-fi series. Here is a refresher, or for new readers a primer, on my fantasy series: The Curious Tale.

The Curious Tale is the flagship of all my creative writing. It is 24 years old, having begun in July of 1999 as a no-engine online RPG on a message board for an online game that was called Utopia and which is unbelievably still going today. I had played the game itself for a while, but gradually found myself spending more time on the message boards, especially the Politics and Roleplaying boards, and that's where I would end up planting the seed that would grow into my life's work.

That RPG, known as After The Hero: A Curious Tale, tells the story of a powerful mate named Galavar and his Galan people, who, in league with the God of Logic and Wisdom, Sourros, rise up to attempt to conquer the world in the name of changing it for the better; and the story tells also—and indeed mainly focuses upon—the many peoples who resist the Galans along the way. The RPG ran for over a year and was performed by roughly half a dozen core cast members and another dozen or so peripheral cast who were much less involved and mostly stuck around only briefly. I am very proud to say that the RPG lasted all the way to completion—a feat few RPGs ever achieve! I credit my own vision and persistence in this, and the excellent enthusiasm and passion of the core cast. When the RPG ended, I moved almost immediately into a novelization phase of the story which has lasted ever since.

The Curious Tale is not an open franchise, like Star Trek, with different productions and incarnations. Rather, the whole thing is built around one central story: After The Hero, or ATH—the story told in the RPG. As a novel, ATH has been vastly modified, overhauled, rewritten, and improved over the years; it has grown up with me and it can scarcely be called the same story at all. Many characters and plots are completely different.

Set in the magical world of Relance, After The Hero in its modern form still tells the story of the Galan Conquest to attempt to take over the world, and we still explore both the Galans and those who resist them. It isn't really a war story, defined by battles and military grit, although these things do show up from time to time. It also isn't a typical political intrigue story, like Game of Thrones or what have you, driven by treachery and political posturing per se. In fact I might say that ATH is essentially genre-less, frequently drawing from but never substantively conforming to any of the various genres within fantasy. I would like to think that ATH reads as though it were a bardic account of a real-world event in history, except in Relance rather than Earth.

The title of the story comes from the fact that ATH intrinsically subverts the core fantasy trope of a hero who must rise up to stop a great evil: In ATH, the so-called hero is defeated right at the beginning (in fact this actually happened already, in the Prelude); and the so-called great evil—Galavar in this case—is not necessarily evil at all. ATH is, thus, an exploration of the premise: "What if the villain were free to pursue their plan without a meddling hero to stop them, and what if, for good measure, the villain weren't actually saddled with all of the petty traits of villainy? What if the villain were wise and well-intentioned and not truly a villain at all?" This idea was a lot more radical in 1999 than it is in 2023, but it's honestly still pretty provocative, given that, underneath all of the mainstream applications of layers of grittiness and grayness in contemporary fantasy, there usually are still clearly-coded heroes and villains, or else everything is completely "amoral"—neither of which is the case in ATH. In ATH there are neither heroes nor villains, narratorially speaking. Everyone in the story has their own take. But there is still good and evil. It's just not seated in the protagonist and the antagonist respectively (or vice versa). There are some truly horrible people in the story, conventional villain types, but they usually dwell on the sidelines. They aren't the drivers of events, not in the grand scheme. Most characters are meant to be relatable and sympathetic (if not always truly likable), and it is my sincere hope that you will be able to genuinely root for or root against any of them depending on your personal worldview and character.

After The Hero in its current form has three elemental purposes:

Most noticeably, it is a gigantic worldbuilding story—as is the rest of The Curious Tale supporting it; more on that in a bit. ATH is a classic case of a story written to bring to life a proverbial encyclopedia. Here is the gleaming City of Sele, the seat of Gala, upon the Shos Plateau—the Plateau of the Moons—at the top of the world, roughly fifteen thousand feet above sea level. There is the thriving sanctuary metropolis of Soda Fountain, the great jeweled city of the broiling hot desert of the Sodaplains in the Easts Beyond the Edge of the World. And so on, and so forth. ATH is an opportunity to explore the world of Relance and meet its people, and to fall in love with Relance as surely as so many of us fall in love with the Earth when we bother to look upon it. The Curious Tale is extremely deliberate and intentional and bespoke; its allusions and homages to the many influences on my work are endless, but Relance and all its contents are painstakingly created to the contours of my own vision. I have my own way of storytelling, and do not follow fantasy genre conventions in most cases. If I have done my job correctly, you shouldn't be able to predict the story on the basis of tropes and stereotypes.

The second elemental purpose of ATH, and actually the most important one, is that it organizes itself around the character Silence Terlais, the closest thing to a sole main character that ATH has, even though Silence is offscreen more than onscreen. Silence is a Guard of Galavar—one of Galavar's inner circle. She is tasked with peacefully swaying the hearts and minds of the nations of Relance as a preferred alternative to military conquest. Amid this task she is also grappling with the treachery of the Gods, the growing hubris of Galavar himself, and her own past secrets and unanswerable dreams. After The Hero inevitably follows Silence's undertakings, her personal growth, and her many adventures and conflicts. Silence is also the central character in The Curious Tale as a whole, not just After The Hero, inasmuch as all plots flow through her and she is at the center of the ultimate question of "Why?"

Finally, the third elemental purpose of ATH is to genuinely and fairly test the so-called Galance Ideal, the political–ethical vision that Galavar and his Galan people have of taking over the world to change it for the better. Like so many others, I have been frustrated and bewildered from a young age by the intransigence and injustice in our real world of Earth. ATH is my life's best attempt to present a viable solution. I know how audacious that is, and I am not promising a solution that will actually work. I'm just giving it my honest best shot. ATH can, if desired, be read critically as an enormous political manifesto wrapped in an illustrative story.

Supporting ATH are most of the other stories of The Curious Tale. These are called The Interludes, so named because they are standalone stories which are nevertheless connected to and interspersed among ATH at strategic points to flesh out specific characters or events where ATH itself would be too heavily detoured or would otherwise be unable to turn its attention. The Prelude to After The Hero, the novel I published in 2015, is an Interlude, and, as the front-side bookend to After The Hero, is named "Prelude" instead of "Interlude." Another Interlude is the incomplete and long-on-hiatus story The Great Galavar, which I published in the mid-2010s as a weekly serial (and which I will get back to at some point!). A third Interlude is the story of the place-singer and travelling bard Afiach Bard, Mate of Song, which came to me as an inspiration in 2012 and 2013 but which has not been published yet due to much of it not actually being written down (despite the story itself being completely developed) and because the various Interludes are intended to be read at certain points during ATH, and Mate of Song's turn is quite a ways off in the distance. And there will likely be other Interludes too, provided I live long enough to write them.

Finally, rounding out the contents of The Curious Tale as a whole, there are some more peripheral elements arrayed loosely as constellations around ATH and its Interludes. If you remember the satire series Empire on Ice, or my Curious Score musical compositions, or my Curious Tale Saturdays essays, those would all be examples of this stuff. While the website is woefully out of date these days, you can find most of these contents over at CuriousTale.org, as well as additional information / orientation / welcome information about the world of Relance.

I have mentioned that I am working on two novels, The Curious Tale novel and the Galaxy Federal novel. But that's a little bit misleading. I conceive of After the Hero as one novel, but in terms of printed books it would have to be an entire series of them or else the novel would end up being considerably thicker than it was tall. So, while it is true that I am working on the ATH novel, the actual discrete "book" that I am working on is merely Chapter 1 of it. The original ATH RPG had thirteen chapters if I recall correctly. While I don't know how many chapters the ATH novel will have, it will be more than a few. This should give you a sense of how big this work truly is. You can see now how I expect this to take the rest of my life!...and perhaps even longer. =/

That's another point I need to make. I would be a hypocrite not to warn you that I am no Stephen King. It takes me a long time to write my books. I anticipate becoming faster in the future (and indeed have already sped up over the past decade), but even still the terminus of ATH is decades away. Don't get invested if you need resolution right now. Even Chapter 1 of ATH is almost certainly several years away from being done.

Speaking of Chapter 1, it tells the story of the first day of the Galan Conquest, where the Galans, reeling from the failed but destructive assault of the Hero, desperately set out to capture the aforementioned desert city of Soda Fountain. We meet many Galans and Sodish, and others, all beneath a mysterious river of fire that fades in across the sky and grows fiercer by the hour.

[anashins]

The Right Kind of Wrong

Title: The Right Kind of Wrong

Pairing: Jaehyun x You

Genre: hate to love, cheating, college!au, friendship, romance, smut

Warnings: smut, cheating, cursing, toxicity

Word Count: 8.454

Summary: There are many reasons for you to hate Jung Jaehyun. Aside from being cocky and selfish, the fact that he is dating your best friend is another one of them. But his mesmerizing smile - to hell with it - just isn't.

____

There were at least a hundred things you hated about Jung Jaehyun.

The fact that he was dating your best friend was just one of them.

Not a single day had passed by in the last year in which she hadn’t complained about her boyfriend having flirted with another woman, having ditched her again, going to a party and ignoring her all night, or simply dragging her mood down by one of his unpredictable and hurtful actions.

Aside from being cocky, selfish, arrogant and reckless, Jung Jaehyun was absolutely incapable of being a decent human being for more than ten seconds, and you were wondering why he was so damn popular despite all his faults.

When you went out with your friend group, he mocked the boys trying to hit on you, telling you they were so desperate for that move. When you were attending the same class, he purposely sat down next to you to distract you from the lesson. When he was at your dorm, he kept moving your things onto high shelves, knowing you couldn’t reach them.

And his smirk everytime he did so… his smirk every time he mocked you was so annoying. But also so hot.

Fuck, you thought whenever his mischievious eyes met yours again, and you had to turn away, at a loss for words and afraid he’d caught you flushing. You were so ashamed, because you actually wanted to hate him.

There were many reasons for you to hate Jung Jaehyun, but his mesmerizing smile wasn't one of them.

You hadn’t hated him from the first moment that you two had officially met as you had gotten introduced to each other through your best friend who was also your dorm mate, though. She had found him on a dating app, and you had found him sitting in your class two days later, talking back to the professor.

Back then, you had started admiring his intelligence and courage. But those were the only two positive things you had spotted so far as you only tried to stay as far away from him as possible, emphasizing his negative character traits over and over again.

But the truth was that staying away from him was a very hard thing to do, and you fought every day for your sanity, trying to be a good friend and suppressing your controversial feelings for a man who was absolutely forbidden to you.

“He went drinking last night and I saw an instagram story of him grinding against another girl on the dancefloor!” your best friend complained in your arms, tears on the verge of flowing. “Who’s doing that even?!”

A few pairs of eyes turned into your direction, but when you threw fierce glances at the people staring at you, they passed by very quickly.

When you had been invited to your friend Johnny’s house party, you hadn’t expected to be spending the evening comforting your best friend, even though that had been your daily routine for the past three weeks.

It had grown toxicly usual for Jaehyun and her to fight in a two to three day rhythm over the smallest things, and although their wonky relationship or whatever it was hadn’t been very steady before with them breaking up nearly monthly, lately it had grown almost obnoxious.

“Why don’t you just break up with him?” you suggested again and immediately felt your heart sink.

It wasn’t like you wanted them to break up because you wanted Jaehyun for yourself. You’d never do that to her.

Your best friend was just constantly hurting, and it hurt you just as much when you saw her suffering so greatly. Jung Jaehyun wasn’t a good guy, and you both knew. Yet, she couldn’t let go of him. You knew exactly how that felt.

Even if they were to break up, he wouldn’t belong to you. Because a friend’s ex was a taboo. So having Jaehyun gone entirely from your lives would kill two birds with one stone.

“Not that again!” your friend whined and retreated from you, sinking into the couch with her arms crossed and no signs of tears anymore. “I can’t! I mean… look at him! He’s so hot, and don’t get me even started about his skills in bed. That’s where we usually make up, you know, so-”

“I’m going to get you something to drink!” you interrupted her and jumped up. “You totally need a cocktail now! To come to your senses!”

You loved your best friend dearly, but you didn’t want to hear about Jaehyun’s skills by all means. At some times, your friend didn’t have a filter, and then, it only spiraled downhill from there. You heard them often enough in the dorm, that was already pushing you to your limits.

When you entered the kitchen, you reached up to get a glass from the shelf, but like most of the times, you were too short for the remaining ones at the very top.

“Here, let me help you.”

A soft voice echoed from behind you, but before you could turn around to follow the tone, the guy had already heaved up his arm and reached over you to the very top of the shelf to get you a glass.

Shifting around, you faced the mischievous expression of the young man you had wanted to avoid and who your best friend was currently crying over.

Without a “thank you”, you reached out your hand to grab the glass from Jaehyun, but he immediately shot his arm up to bring the glass high over his head and far out of your reach.

“You think a simple ‘thank you’ is too much for you?”

“Fuck off, Jaehyun.” You crunched with your teeth and narrowed your eyes. “I’d rather die of thirst!”

“What did I do again?” He rolled his eyes in an annoyed manner as though his high spirits got ruined. “What did she tell you?”

“She told me everything she saw from last night!” you defended your friend. “That’s enough for me to get the picture!”

“Okay, and did the picture somehow include me pushing the girl away after she had grinded on me?”

You gulped.

“Just as I thought.”

He placed the glass on the counter, but somehow, this hadn’t got your both’s attention anymore.

“There are two sides of the same coin, yet all you've ever done was looking only at one.”

He approached you, and the rising hotness in your cheeks made you withdraw until your hips bumped into the kitchen counter.

Jaehyun leaned in and propped his arm against the same spot right next to your hip as he asked, “I know you’re her best friend, but being a friend doesn’t mean supporting your friends delusional, one sided thoughts into oblivion. Being a friend sure means to support, I’m not denying that. But being a true friend means to tell someone when they’re wrong. And I am not the one at fault here, y/n.”

“You were doing many stupid things to hurt her in the past!” you started blabbering just to bridge over the silence you’d get when you would stare at his mesmerizing eyes for a little longer. “How am I supposed to believe you?”

“You aren’t supposed to believe me.” He retreated, with the glass in his hand. “All I’m asking for is a chance to explain myself.”

Again, you were flabbergasted by the way he expressed his thoughts that stood in contrast to his questionable behavior. One of the main things that fascinated you. But you quickly turned this feeling into hate by recalling his wrongdoings from the night before.

Looking at the glass, Jaehyun continued, “Yes, there were many things I did wrong in the past. And I’m not going to pinpoint my finger at my girlfriend to tell that she was doing just as many questionable things as me. But people have reasons for doing the things they do. That’s probably why we’re such a good match.”

You didn’t understand a word. In your eyes, and you only knew about their relationship by what your friend told you and what you observed when you were hanging out, the two weren’t a good match at all.

He was the one constantly hurting her feelings, and she was the one to always get hurt.

Or... wasn’t it?

Jaehyun then thrusted the glass into your hand. “You’re lucky, y/n, you know that? It must be so great, living that freely, without any burdens… So oblivious to everything.”

With these words, he disappeared from the kitchen, leaving you behind all alone with the glass in your hand.

You looked at the item, your face getting reflected in the crystals to unrecognizability while Jaehyun’s words still kept you occupied. They had such an impact on you that you suddenly started to question whether your hate against him was actually valid.

When you stepped out of the kitchen yourself with a full glass of your best friend’s favorite cocktail in your hand, you found her in Jaehyun’s arms again, wildly kissing, his kind words suddenly vanished from your mind upon spotting them.

Instead, there was a little monster called jealousy sitting right inside your chest.

___

“8am in the morning! Who even places classes that early?!”

With a groan, Jaehyun flopped down in the seat next to you.

“Shut up, class is about to start.”

“Man, you must be really fun at parties,” he replied. “The professor is not even here yet.”

“You’re annoying, Jung Jaehyun, and if you weren’t dating my friend, I wouldn’t actually talk to you at all.”

“What are the odds we’re still connected to each other, huh! Tell me, y/n, what did I ever do to you? How did I ever hurt you? We’ve never even really spoken with each other ever since we’ve gotten introduced.”

“And I am grateful for this every single day.”

“What is it that you hate about me so much?” he questioned further, his eyes challenging.

But with your eyes straight ahead and no words on your lips, you ignored him as the professor entered the room only a short moment after, announcing the class’ start.

Your pen flew over the sheet, noting down the professor’s words when suddenly, goose bumps spread all over your arm.

When your eyes followed the trail to its source, your right elbow touched Jaehyun’s left one as a result of your hectic writing motions as you had moved too far to the side. The spot on your skin was so warm and so…

You withdrew your arm right away, placing it back to where it usually belonged, but Jaehyun’s own limb had moved so far to the left that you had no place to rest it next to your notes anymore without having his skin barely one inch apart from you. You weren’t touching anymore, but he was so close that you still felt him somehow.

Of course you could drop your arm and place it on your lap as the professor had stopped presenting the most important points of this lesson. Of course you could just move further away with your entire belongings, but the fact was that you didn’t. That you couldn’t.

Instead, you were fixating your eyes on the board right in front of you, listening to your professor’s words but not actually understanding a single syllable that he uttered as your heart beat fast against your chest.

You hoped that Jaehyun didn’t notice how desperate you were for him not to shift away right now. That you actually enjoyed it, but felt so much hatred at the same time. Not against him, but against you - for feeling this way.

“Can you answer my question, Miss y/n?”

Your eyes widened in shock as you got addressed by the professor by your surname. You were actually a good student who was always paying attention in class. Under normal circumstances, this wouldn’t have happened. But now you got caught red handed not listening to him, and he was a very strict lecturer.

“I… um…” you stuttered.

“The answer to my question, Miss.”

“Yes… the answer…” You gulped as you didn’t even know the question. “The answer is…”

From the corner of your eyes, you perceived how a sheet was slowly moving into your direction from Jaehyun’s place. His finger was pointed at a paragraph that you had also noted down only shortly before.

Suddenly, you knew what the question was about and answered formally to the professor’s task.

With your heart having calmed down after the shock, you let yourself sink down on your seat again. You had gotten distracted only once by something that shouldn’t bother you at all.

This wouldn’t happen again, you swore to yourself.

____

“No ‘thank you’ again from you?”

You turned around to Jaehyun who had rosen a brow at you. “Is this becoming your thing now? Asking for ‘thank yous’?”

“Is this becoming your thing now?” he returned. “Not saying ‘thank you’? I saved your ass in class.”

“Well, I haven’t asked for that, so go beg somewhere else for attention.”

You made your way through the crowded club, feelling the bass under your feet and the techno music in your ears. Jaehyun was following suit.

“Do you want some kind of reward from me? Because you’re not going to get it.”

“I don’t want a reward. Hey.”

He reached out and grabbed you by your arm, right there on the dancefloor. The feeling from this morning returned, but in a higher intensity as it spread all over your body.

“All I’m asking for is respect.”

You snorted. “Respect? Do you respect my friend when you destroy her weekend plans to go drinking with your friends instead? Do you respect my friend when you dance ass on ass with another girl? Do you respect my friend when you hurt her feelings with your rude words? I don’t like you, Jung Jaehyun, because you’re a bad person, and respect is the last thing you’ll ever get from me!”

You yanked yourself out from his grip and disappeared in the mass. What was up with him? Why was he bothering so much lately and evoking all these controversial feelings inside you by acting like this? He should just stay away.

With your eyes closed, you started to move with the music, all by yourself there on the dancefloor. You wanted to collect your thoughts, but as the music flooded through your body, you realized that thinking about nothing was probably the best way to cope with your inner struggles right now.

You opened your eyes widely when you suddenly felt a hand on your bum.

Turning around with much anger reflected in your mien, you stared at a boy around your age who grinned at you seductively. Your fierce gaze was probably mistaken for an invitation when he approached you further, grabbed you by your hips from the front and pressed you against him.

With his lips on your ear, he whispered, “I like what I see.”

And you wanted to scream. You probably did, but it got drowned out by the loud music, and his grip was way too hard for you to free yourself that easily as you shuffled in his arms.

“Let me go!”

Yet, his hands roamed around your private areas like they owned it.

“HEY!”

Before you could scream once more, the guy got dragged away from you by the last person you had expected it from.

“She said let go of her, you asshole!”

Jaehyun grabbed him by his collar, and his height and angry expression alone were probably enough for the other guy to nearly piss his pants as he hastily mouthed,

“I’m so sorry!”

When Jaehyun let go of him, he slipped off silently and wasn’t seen again.

You stood there awkwardly with your arms hugging your chest, still digesting the happenings.

“Did he hurt you?” Jaehyun asked when he leaned in for you to understand better.

You shook your head.

“Do you want to go outside?”

You nodded.

Jaehyun took you by your hand to lead you through the dancing crowd, and you didn’t protest.

This gesture was the total opposite to the disgusting one from the guy who had harassed you shortly before. This touch was raw and chaste. Nothing to be ashamed of and fight against, but something you wanted to accept wholeheartedly.

When you stood outside of the club, Jaehyun let go of your hand, and you finally whispered the words that he had been longing to hear for quite a time,

“Thank you.”

Against your expectations, he didn’t mock you or return witty words. With his eyes locked with yours, he sincerely told you,

“You’re welcome.”

That was the moment it dawned on you that Jung Jaehyun had more positive sides to him that you had always wanted to blend out. But perhaps, you had reached a point in which this wasn’t possible anymore.

You couldn’t continue keeping your eyes closed to all the kind sides of him. Because the more he showed you, the more you’d open your heart for him.

To you, Jung Jaehyun had to remain a bad person, otherwise you’d fall for him, and falling for your best friend’s boyfriend was a taboo.

“Hey, what are you two doing outside?!” Speaking of the devil, your best friend jumped out of the club’s door and into your direction. “Isn’t the music fun?”

Jaehyun looked at you, waiting for your reaction. You knew that if you wanted to go home, he’d follow. If you wanted to stay, he’d stay too, not letting you out of his sight. Because - and you couldn’t repeat this often enough - Jaehyun was actually a good person.

“I want to go home,” you decided. “You can stay, though! Please just let me be the party pooper all alone, I don’t want to spoil your night.”

“Oh, what a pity!” your friend said with a pout. “You always leave when the party is about to start!”

You shrugged with a weak smile, tired of fighting. “Yeah, I guess so. But I still have a lot of pages to revise.”

“Shall we take you back to the dorm?” Jaehyun offered in a caring voice that you apparently encountered for the first time, and your friend immediately shot a reproachful glare at him.

“Are you being serious right now?” she complained. “She’s a grown ass woman who can go home alone!”

His eyes hadn’t left yours. “I’m talking to her, not you.”

Had it always been like this? Her caring about herself more than about you? If it were the other way around, you wouldn’t let her go home alone in the middle of the night, no matter if you knew something had happened before or not.

Suddenly, you saw your best friend from a whole other perspective. Suddenly, she was the one having Jaehyun on a leash, and he was the one fighting back for his rights, not against her.

Two sides of the same coin… If you were to flip it, would your entire world view change?

For a moment, you hesitated. But not wanting to disturb your friend’s evening, you gave in with a, “It’s okay, I can go alone. Have a nice night!”

But Jaehyun held you back when he insisted on calling you an uber for which he even paid while your best friend continued pouting on the side.

____

“FUCK YOU, JAEHYUN!” you heard your best friend scream later that night from her room, every syllable of hers clearly to hear in your own room while you laid in bed later that night.

The hours before had passed by in a trance as you had only fallen onto your mattress face forward after having quickly changed into your pj’s, that was how much of a toll the day had taken on you.

You just wanted to forget what had happened in the club, but also the thoughts that had constantly been in your mind all the way home that only revolved around Jaehyun. So sleep was the best solution, and you would have gladly continued doing so if there weren’t your best friend and Jaehyun arguing loudly next to you for an hour already.

Then, Jaehyun seemed to return something to which she screamed again, “I DON’T FUCKING CARE!”

Stomping followed the brief silence, a door getting opened, then shut again, and footsteps moved into the direction of the entry door before it fell close behind Jaehyun.

This was a nearly weekly experience for you lately, and usually, you’d just miss hearing their arguments, but this time you couldn’t help but to wonder what they had been yelling about. You just hoped it wasn’t because of you and what had happened to you earlier, because in your eyes, Jaehyun had done nothing wrong.

He had been so incredibly nice and thoughtful that you started to doubt their relationship.

You turned in your bed, wanting to fight those thoughts so badly. Jaehyun was your best friend’s boyfriend, and hence, forbidden fruit for you. But you just couldn’t stop your imagination from running now.

What it would be like in your best friend’s place and get treated like this every day, and the worst part was that you didn’t even feel bad about betraying her in your mind.

Fuck, you only thought and sat straight up in bed, now surely not being able to grasp a light thought to accompaby you back to lseep anymore.

Feeling safe to leave your room ten minutes later as your roommate must have fallen asleep by now, you didn’t think about sleep anymore but wanted to get a glass of water from the kitchen to calm yourself down.

Perhaps, tomorrow, you’d have another look at the entire situation, you tried to convince yourself. After a few more hours of sleep, all these confusing thoughts and feelings might have already been forgotten.

“Cannot sleep yet?”

You turned around and found a half naked Jaehyun only dressed in boxers right in front of you. The empty glass of water in your hands got placed back on the counter with shaky fingers.

“What are you doing here?” you contered.

“Well… she suddenly left.” He shrugged. “We’ve been arguing. You sure haven’t missed that one.”

“I didn’t.”

Still, you were wondering what that was all about, but didn’t want to ask. He lifted the weight off your shoulders himself though.

“It was about you.”

“Oh…?” You gulped.

“When you were gone, I went back to that guy and didn’t let him go that easily. They threw me out of the club and your friend thought I'd ruined the night for her.”

“You shouldn’t have done that.”

You wanted to make your way around him, but he blocked your way as he didn’t move to make space for you to pass by the door.

“What’s making me a bad person, y/n?” Jaehyun suddenly asked. “ The way I saved you in class? In the club? Tell me.”

“You cannot be serious right now. It’s 5am, draw a number for another day.”

You wanted to slip under his stretched out arm, but he moved his body to block you again. “Number one. Now tell me.”

“Because those have been the only times you were nice to me, Jung Jaehyun!” You clenched your fists, breathing in deeply. “When we go out with our friend group, you mock the boys trying to hit on me, telling them they’re so desperate for that move!”

“Because I heard them speaking about you before,” he declared. “They were not looking for something serious but only fun, one had even placed a bet. I tried to spare you from this embarrassment and eventual lovesickness. Go on.”

“When we’re in the same class, you purposely sit down next to me to distract me from the lesson!”

This one let him smirk. “Because I always saw you sitting there alone. You have no friends in that class, and I thought you might need some company. Besides… I knew you couldn’t afford that book we needed, and I purposely always shoved it into your direction when the professor read from it. Have you never noticed?”

Now you have. And you were flabbergasted.

“Wh… when,” you stuttered, “you’re over here, you always move my stuff onto high shelves, knowing I cannot reach them!”

“Because I love to see the defeated look on your face and your cute pout when you have to ask me to get the things for you.”

You didn’t know what to say further as you stood there, frozen on the spot. You hadn’t seen this answer coming.

“Anything else?”

Yes, there were many things you hated him for, and you wanted to throw them all into his face, but as he was standing there in front of you, not even one more came into your mind.

“I just hate you to the core!” you hissed.

But with calmness in his voice, he only turned, “No, you don’t.”

And then, it was all only a blur.

You wanted to push him away, but instead, you found yourself nudging against his body. You wanted to free yourself from his grip, but instead, you wrapped your arms around him. You wanted to escape from his kiss, but instead, you kissed him back in the same passionate manner he kissed you.

Jaehyun’s hands roamed all over your lightly covered body while his lips moved against yours, touching every spot he had missed out on during the entire time he knew you, because you had always pushed him away.

But now that you had opened up to him, you were scared the time window was about to close very soon, so you had to work fast.

You jumped on him, hooking your thighs around his waist while his hands instantly clung around your buttocks to give you the support he needed to carry you to your bedroom. Your hands remained interlaced on the back of his neck when he placed you onto your bed and laid himself between your legs.

Thrown overboard were all your morals, priorities, and the friendship to the person that meant the world to you. You didn’t want to think about all that, but were longing for him so desperately that you wondered for how long you had been suppressing that desire already.

Jung Jaehyun was hot. But he was a bad person.

Or… wasn’t he?

You desperately ground upwards against him, feeling him growing between your legs, and you brought your hands down to massage his length. Jaehyun interrupted your kiss as he hadn’t expected this move to come, and groaned into your ear.

You smirked triumphantly, your hands kneading muscles until he was pressed hard against your palms. Tucking your fingers into the waistband of his boxers, you slid the garment from his hips, revealing his bum. Your hands glided along his curvy, soft mounds, grabbing into them like you were testing ripe peaches.

Jaehyun was pecking your lips as you slid your hands under his body again and closed around his entire girth. He stopped for a moment, but the second he continued on, you started moving your hands, top on top, along his length.

Not being able to concentrate on the feeling down there and kissing you simultaneously anymore, you perceived how Jaehyun got weak with supporting his body on his own arms that he had rested to the left and right of your head. So you decided to take the lead from here on.

Sitting up yourself, you put your palms on Jaehyun’s chest and pushed him backwards onto the mattress. He watched you with surprised eyes, but didn’t protest as you sat on his thighs, eyeing his member with much anticipation.

You slid further down his legs, nearly close to his ankles, and bowed down. With your fingers wrapped around the base of his dick, you led him to your mouth. First letting the tip pass by your lips, then his entire length up until the very middle.

You only heard him swearing, “fucking shit,” before Jaehyun covered his face with his arm placed over his eyes and his other clasping the sheet by his side. Your hair grazed over the area around his navel while you moved your head up and down, cautiously slow at first to give yourself time to adapt to his length.

Then, you started bobbing your head, increasing the speed with every time you came up and nearly let him slip out, your fingers that had closed around him sliding in the same rhythm, adding to the pleasure. The slurping noises that came along with this act filled the room until they got drowned out by Jaehyun’s moans.

He directed his hand towards your head and grabbed it by the back, ruffling your hair between his fingers while he started to thrust upwards, meeting you halfway in the fast motions. Like this, he was able to reach deep within you, but still not far enough so that he could hurt you.

When you witnessed him twitching his legs, you stopped, held him still by the base and decided to tease him further a bit before you allowed him to release himself. With the tip of your tongue, you touched his glans, trailed along the slip and then circled around the entire top part.

Jaehyun’s swearing words came in a never ending trail like a waterfall that you couldn’t really understand all syllables from, but you were sure you did a good job and rewarded him for being patient with the motions from before again, but this time with added pressure and passion.

Suddenly, he grabbed you by your arm, urging you to stop.

“Or else I’m gonna cum,” he said and sat himself up, flipping you around so that you laid under him again.

Hastily, you got rid of your top while Jaehyun worked on your sleeping shorts until shortly after, you were both lying naked on top of each other. You wanted him desperately inside you, because you just didn’t know when you’ve had had sex the last time, but instead of wanting to get through this fast, Jaehyun took his time.

That was when you realized that this entire joining was probably more to him than just sex to get it off. You had thought that because he hadn’t been able to get it tonight from your best friend, he’d take it from you. But the way he touched you insisted otherwise.

If it wasn’t more than just sex, he wouldn’t trail his fingers over your ribcage in feathery-light motions, admiring every inch of your body. If it wasn’t more than a body-focused act, he wouldn’t place soft kisses not only on your mouth, but also onto your forehead, your cheek, your neck… If it wasn’t more, Jaehyun wouldn’t be so damn thoughtful and tender.

He remained his tenderness and his gaze didn’t leave your eyes as well when he finally nudged between your thighs, pushing forward until he filled you up to the brim.

Restraining himself from starting to move right away, Jaehyun took his time to ask you whether you were okay at first when you let out a quiet “oh” that alarmed him. But you were eager to calm him down when you explained that it was only because you hadn’t been with a man in so long, and somehow, after speaking it out, it made you feel embarrassed.

As the boyfriend of your best friend, he’d surely know when you had been in contact with a man the last time, and you hated yourself for being so pressured by society to feel ashamed of who you were and how you lived your life.

But instead of judging you, Jaehyun only nodded and tucked a strand of your hair behind your ear, and suddenly, you were flooded with such a warm feeling towards him that you nearly cried. Rarely had you encountered a man so considerate and caring.

“Tell me when I can go on.”

You bit your lip and felt the uncomfortable pressure in your nether regions getting replaced by a feeling that you hadn’t encountered in so long. A feeling that made you want more, want him.

Holding onto his shoulders with both of your hands, you nodded back at him with a smile which he then returned. When Jaehyun started thrusting in and out of you, your eye contact didn’t break, and you were sure that right now, you were looking at the real Jaehyun at this very moment.

Not the guy you hated. Not the guy your best friend was dating. But instead the person who wanted to protect you from guys that only wanted to use you. A person who offered you company in class and shared his equipment with you. And a person whose cheekiness and affection he showed through childish acts because he didn’t know how to express his feelings otherwise.

This was not the person you were sure of knowing all along. Probably because you hadn’t even gotten to know him in the first place.

One arm now clung around his neck while with the other, you grabbed the pillow beside you. You threw your head back in excitement, his pushes coming in short intervals one after another, and he was hitting all the right spots with them.

Jaehyun propped his arms up to the left and right of him, lifting his upper body to gather all his strength in his groin area and stopped for a brief moment before he thrusted inside you with such force that it nearly knocked all air out of your lungs, and you couldn’t respond with anything else than moaning.

It felt so good, so… right. But how could something so wrong still feel so right?

Right now, you didn’t hate Jaehyun or your best friend the most, but yourself and the fact that you continued on and on. That you brought your hips up to meet his thrusts with hazy thoughts and his lips all over yours when he slowed down with his movements to dedicate himself to caressing your breasts.

You felt Jaehyun’s hot tongue swirling over your buds, and you shook under him. Not because it felt cold, but because his tender caresses just felt so good. You didn’t have the feeling that he could do anything wrong with whatever he carried out, that was your impression about how well your bodies meshed together.

No, you didn’t hate Jaehyun. You had always only hated how he had presented himself to you. But there was so much more to him.

Sweat droplets showed on his forehead when he continued with the hard thrusts again, the sound of you both breathing heavily mixing together with the sloppy noises of your bodies moving against each other filling the room, but no matter how messy sex was, it was the most romantic thing you had experienced in a long time.

Your eye contact also didn’t break when Jaehyun arose above you, his sweaty chest glistening in the dim light that shone through your windows, and increased his pace even more. When he dropped his head and bit his lip in the process, you wrapped your arms around him and added pressure to your nether regions as you felt him approaching his heights.

It felt very good to you too, but you were by any means not as far as him yet, so you didn’t blame him when he came only a short moment after with a groan that sounded sexy as hell to you.

You held him tightly when he fell limply onto your chest, still breathing heavily from the orgasm that slowly faded. Staring at the ceiling, you smiled with him in your arms, just enjoying the moment when Jaehyun moved away from you.

“We’re not done here yet,” you saw him grin as he laid himself next to you, rolled onto the side and placed his head in his palms as he propped his elbow against the mattress.

You wondered what was to come when you felt his finger tips dragging from your thighs to your navel, then lower again and stopped right at your most sensitive spot.

“Oh!” you let out as he placed two fingers on your folds and started moving them up and down with your remaining juices as lube that made the intense feeling kick in almost immediately.

You screamed when he added pressure and now directed circling motions around the sensitive bundle of nerves. From your half-closed eyes, you witnessed him looking at you with such admiration but also cheekiness as you writhed and wreathed under him, yet spread your legs even wider as release was so close.

Jaehyun leaned in to you, his fingers not letting go of the continuity as he half covered your body with his and just kissed you passionately. Like this, he encountered first hand how the orgasm took over you, and you moaned into his mouth, riding it out against his hand.

It felt like the most natural thing in the world when he wrapped his arms around you right after and pulled you onto his chest, and you drifted off into a slumber shortly after.

Even though the first tendencies of your bad consciousness set in before you closed your eyes, you decided that this would be the problem of tomorrow.

No, you didn’t hate Jung Jaehyun.

If anything, you should probably hate yourself.

___

“YES… YES… YESYESYES, OHMYGOD!”

You heard your friend from the other side of the wall, having rudely awakened you in the early morning hours. At least you thought so. But a glimpse at your phone through sleepy eyes told you that it was past 11am already.

Within a second, you were wide awake.

You were still naked, but the clothes on your floor only belonged to you, and the spot next to you in the bed was empty.

“OH!MY!GOD!.... YES! OH… OH.... AAAAH… OHOHOH… YES!!”

Jaehyun was gone. At least from your room.

Your best friend’s headboard constantly bumped against the wall, and you grabbed your pillow to cover your ears with it. You didn’t want to hear the sounds. Not because they stole your sleep, but because somehow, for the first time, you didn’t feel disturbed by the noise, but actually hurt.

In your mind, you imagined Jaehyun’s mesmerizing smile, the witty expression he was constantly wearing and his deep voice that had showed you for the first time last night that there was a certain softness within it.

You felt hurt, because you knew all the things from last night had been real between you two, yet he was still fucking your best friend mere hours later. What you had shared and felt had been special, yet he was still with her.

And suddenly, you felt hate again. But towards yourself. For betraying your best friend with him. But first and foremost, for betraying yourself.

You had never hated Jung Jaehyun.

You had always felt some certain kind of attraction towards him, but kept telling yourself you hated him to push him as far away from you as possible. If this wouldn’t be so wrong under these circumstances, this attraction would feel right and could blossom. But like this, you could never come to enjoy this feeling entirely.

Your relationship had been doomed from the very start, because given the wicked circumstances, you would never be able to form a healthy relationship. It was like a stain that would never vanish on a white sheet.

So you just decided to continue as usual. To keep this a secret between the both of you and just to carry on with your life.

And to hate Jung Jaehyun just a little more.

You just didn’t know how to feel and act towards your best friend without feeling so much… regret.

“Good morning.”

But the young man stepping out of your best friend’s room wasn’t Jaehyun. But Johnny.

You sat there in the kitchen with a cup of coffee, your mouth agape. And then it started to rattle in your head.

Lately, there were times when your best friend had screamed the name “Jaehyun!” loudly during the act. Those were the times you had actually seen him the next morning. But the nights she hadn’t screamed a certain name, no one had ever come out. And those times, you had counted more than the ones with Jaehyun in the past weeks, just when their loud arguments started on a nearly daily basis.

“Where’s Jaehyun?” you asked without greeting her good morning as you walked into her room.

“Oh, we had a fight last night,” she explained to you while getting herself dressed casually. “And then we broke up. I went away to be with Johnny after throwing him out, and we’ve only gotten back this morning. I hope he left last night already and didn’t stay here.”

“What?” you wondered.

“Yeah.” She shrugged. “I’ll get over it.”

“You actually already got over it as I’ve seen!”

“Oh, Johnny?”

“You’ve been fucking him for weeks already?” you provoked.

She shrugged again. “Perhaps a month… So what?”

You stood there, totally lost for words. “You’ve been crying about Jaehyun to me ever since you got together! That he flirted with other women, ditched you, went to parties and ignored you! And now you’re telling me you’ve been cheating on him for quite a while?! And this instagram story drama from last week?”

She sighed and flopped down onto the bed. “Okay, admittedly, I’m not an angel in this story, but he is by far neither! He was not. There were many things he has done wrong in the past. But then he actually started… doing nothing wrong. Being the picture perfect boyfriend without all these flaws and drama. And perhaps, this is not something that I want, so I started to look around elsewhere.”

“So…” You paused, still processing the shock. “Was it all an act? All the times you’ve cried to me over him lately while cheating behind his back?”

“Not an act, precisely,” she said reluctantly. “Yes, he explained every situation to me. And I was being dramatic over it for nothing, perhaps. I don’t know… I still enjoyed being with him though, but it just didn’t feel right anymore. I want to have men just… telling me I’m right, always coming back to me… what’s a relationship without fire? But Jaehyun didn’t want to do this anymore.”

In your head, you recalled everything that Jaehyun had told you. About there being two sides of the same coin, about you being so oblivious. All this time, he knew that she had cheated on him. He knew what you thought of him, yet he had never made a move to ever explain it to you.

But why?

“As he should,” you then stated. “How you treated him was awful!”

“Only because I cheated on him a few times?” she chuckled. “Come on!”

“I’m your best friend, and yet you lied to me! You twisted and turned stories so that you’d always be the one at right! But the truth is, you’re the bad person here. Not him.”

“Now what? He’s gone from our lives. Don’t care about him.”

But the truth was, you did. Now more than about her.

That was why, an hour later, you found yourself in front of his dorm. When he opened shortly after you had knocked, you stared at him, still gasping for air as you had run the entire way here, with all the memories from last night coming back with each step.

“She’s been cheating on you,” were the only words you brought out.

“I know.”

“For how long?” you asked.

“I assume for just as long.”

You breathed in heavily, not understanding a word. “But why did you stay with her?”

Jaehyun smiled meekly. “Because I don’t think I deserve a good person like you are.”

It ran hot and cold down your back. “I… I don’t understand.”

He leaned against the door frame with crossed arms, and even though he seemed uncomfortable talking about his feelings, he still did.

“I haven’t been the best boyfriend for her most times in this relationship, I admit this openly. We weren’t really good for each other and it destroyed me to the point that I wanted to change. But when I started being the boyfriend she had wished for, it wasn’t right either and she started cheating. So I just settled with it. Because I thought I screwed up to that point where I won’t be able to make anyone happy anymore and also don’t deserve the same in return. Even though I only wanted you...”

“You douche!” You stomped with your feet on the ground.

“What?” he returned perplexed with furrowed brows.

“Everyone deserves love and to love! And you’re not different from anyone else!”

His confusion got replaced with a mild smile. “You’re so kind, y/n. That’s one of the things I like the most about you. But you’re also oblivious.”

Jaehyun pulled out his phone, scrolled through his messenger and started playing a voice message from a very familiar person.

“Why do you even care about this bitch, Jaehyun?!” In the background, you heard music and other people talking. “She’s a stupid nerd, and I’ve only befriended her because she helps me studying and listens to my complains since we’re dorm mates, so don’t even waste a single thought about this party pooper!”

You stood there as though you had been rendered motionless. Your heart had dropped to your feet.

“This is from last night when I quickly went outside again to check whether you rode away safely with your uber and she couldn’t find me directly. That’s why we argued and broke up. No, it’s not the first time she’s talked about you like this.” He put his phone away. “I thought letting you hate me would make it easier for a kind person like you to keep their distance from someone like me. Because, in the end, I will only hurt you too. But the more I started to genuinely like you, the more I felt protective towards you. I couldn’t see her speaking about you like this anymore.”

Your breathing came in hitches as your whole world suddenly crashed over you. Your best friend wasn’t your best friend. She had probably never been.

You stumbled backwards, and Jaehyun stepped forward to grab you by your arm, but you pulled it away.

“I…. I just…” you stuttered. “I have to… talk to her.”

“Sure.”

The whole way home, you only cried.

Not over Jaehyun, but over the betrayal of someone you had considered your best friend, yet had hurt you in the most painful way like no man ever could. And the fact that you had been an asshole to her to the same extent after having slept with her boyfriend the same night they had broken up was probably the final straw.

You were no saint here. You had added to your both’s downfall just as much. And it hurt much more than any heartbreak you had experienced so far.

You had to sort your life out and right now, and amongst this chaos there was no place for Jaehyun in your life.

____

You put the last vase with dried flowers on your shelf, stepped backwards to your room’s door and inspected the final set up.

“Finished!” you praised yourself.

It had taken you three months to move to a new dorm, but this was your last step to a new chapter in your life.

You hadn’t had contact with your former best friend ever since your final conversation in which you had handed the keys over to her. The many conversations before had only consisted of screams, accusations and tears.

She had admitted to saying all those things about you, but also to genuinely have come like you. You weren’t so sure whether that was real or one of her lies again. You had admitted to sleeping with Jaehyun, and she would have forgiven you for that as she hadn’t been really in love with him anymore at this point, but you were sure you didn’t want either in your life anymore.

Your best friend because she had hurt you deeply, and Jaehyun because of your burdensome history. All of you had done so many wrong things, and you were only a bundle of toxic people together, so chaotic that you were better off apart from each other.

But you didn’t want to be this toxic kind of person anymore. So you moved out and left your old life behind.

You didn’t go to that class with Jaehyun anymore, and although you missed him, the touches of your joint night still present on your skin sometimes, you wanted to move on from even the mere imaginations of him as well. You were sure that you’d find a guy just like him, but you missed him wherever you went and couldn’t help but ask yourself “what if?”

The fact that he hadn’t reached out to you either made it easier, and as summer break came and passed, and the new semester started, you had kissed two news guys already, made a new friend group and were just overall happy.

But you still missed Jaehyun dearly and all the possibilities of what could have happened if only your timing had been right in life. Even if he wasn’t the right one for you.

“Is this seat taken?”

And then, one day, there he was again. Taking the seat next to you as though no time had ever passed between the two of you, smiling that mesmerizing smile you didn’t hate.

You only stared at him, and his kind expression didn’t break. When you moved your head to the front again where the professor introduced himself, you couldn’t help but to smile too. Because this wasn’t the expression of a bad person.

People changed, and just like good traits could turn into bad traits, a bad person could turn into a good one also. And they all deserved a second chance.

You had only known the Jaehyun from your best friend’s perspective, and then also his body. But even though you had gotten a glimpse of the real Jaehyun here and there, you didn’t quite know him entirely yet.

But you wanted to. The good, the bad, the real. Jaehyun wasn’t the right one for you, but such a thing didn’t exist. What mattered were only your feelings.

Because in fact, you didn’t hate Jung Jaehyun. At all.

[sketching-shark]

I think it's the ironic fact that JTTW fans already know how DBK and Sun Wukong's friendship broke apart but are more curious on LMK versions of Sun Wukong and the Six Eared Macaque were friends alongside falling out.

HA! Well, while it often does seem that way, I'm going to go ahead and be a complete snob in a Journey to the West purist kind of way by wondering how many Six Eared Macaque fans would consider themselves more JTTW fans or more Monkie Kid fans, or if they feel they're a mix of both...

I've seen a lot of people argue that these two works of fiction are their own thing and that as such Monkie Kid (and associated fanworks) shouldn't be expected to follow the canon of JTTW, and fair enough for some parts. I've also, however, seen people who argue for this complete separation seeming to use it as an excuse to not acknowledge or learn about ANY original aspects of characters such as Sun Wukong and the Demon Bull King, or even very important deities such as Guanyin and the Jade Emperor, and who as such end up making some pretty gross generalizations/assumptions about them even though they are of great religious and cultural importance.

For example (and while I know a lot of the fun people get from fan works is in exaggerating certain traits), Sun Wukong seems to often be presented with an "inherently" evil/thoughtless/chaotic character, while his intelligence, deep love of his family, genuine efforts to become a better person, & many acts of saving lives, as presented in JTTW, aren't even mentioned. I feel like a lot of this is due to the way he acts in Monkie Kid (while I maintain that this version of Sun Wukong seems to be Bad End Monkey King, he does do a lot of deflecting his issues with a show of humor/a carefree attitude & does seem really bad at communicating due to a fear of making things worse). Even so, the popularity of Thoughtless/Evil/Selfish Sun Wukong that doesn’t really allow for any of the nuance or a display of his beneficial traits as shown in JTTW does make me wonder how many people have been exposed to a good translation of og classic Sun Wukong...As I've said before, I've noted that a number of Chinese people on this site have expressed frustration with the fact that a good chunk of the monkey king’s Western audience seems to be getting their impressions about Sun Wukong, the Demon Bull King, the Six Eared Macaque, etc. from some mix of Overly Sarcastic Productions, Monkie Kid, and social media instead of from at least a translation of the original text, and it is true that a LOT of the nuance of these work and these characters can be very easily lost, especially if your drawing your information of them primarily from a cartoony version of the original source. 

That would be an interesting poll though...out of curiosity, how many of you fine folk have read the break-up & fight between Sun Wukong and the Demon Bull King either in the original text or in a translation, or is your exposure to them primarily through Monkie Kid? 

Again, I need to make it clear that I'm not Chinese & didn't grow up with the story, but I will admit for my own part that reading the DBK/SWK break-up in the Yu translation actually made me more curious about how their dynamic is going to play out in Monkie Kid than I am curious about what's going to happen with Mr. Macaque. 

This is primarily because besides SWK’s fight with Princess Iron Fan and DBK being given a LOT of page space in JTTW, there seems to have been some serious stuff that went down between the three of them in the events post-JTTW and pre-the main plot of Monkie Kid...the last we see of DBK in JTTW (if memory serves correctly) was him being hauled off by a host of heavenly warriors to be judged for his crimes of not giving SWK the palm leaf fan & also eating humans. When Monkie Kid starts, however, we are told that DBK had emerged “from the Netherworld” & immediately starts wrecking everything around him. What this suggests--if Monkie Kid is something of a fan continuation of JTTW--is that DBK ended up being executed by the heavenly forces, but managed to fight his way out of the underworld in a manner somewhat similar to SWK, who we are told he is equal in strength to in JTTW. In that beginning fight of Monkie Kid DBK is also shown as so enraged that he won’t stop his path of destruction until SWK buries him under a mountain for 500 years. It’s never said in the show, but--and this is important--this is basically exactly what Buddha did to SWK to start him on the path of atonement. So there seems to be some very intentional parallels between SWK’s havoc in heaven & DBK’s havoc on earth, which may suggest that one of the things Monkie Kid SWK really wants is for his former dear friend, his sworn brother, to find a way like him to be less violent and thus ultimately less vulnerable to destructive and self-destructive behavior, and that the way he tried to start this was by giving DBK the same treatment he got when he was a raging warlord. 

We are furthermore told that it was right after DBK was sealed that SWK disappeared for all those centuries, and while the impulse may be to write it off as him just wanting to enjoy himself (given a lot of his behavior in the show’s timeline), given the indications that this SWK may be deeply depressed, I feel like the answer could be something a lot more tragic...there seem to be a number of clues in Monkie Kid that while the journey of JTTW happened, something made it end disastrously, with SWK either assuming or knowing that Zhu Bajie, Sha Wujing, Tang Sanzang, and Bai Longma are dead. And per JTTW, this wouldn’t be the first time that he’s experienced a horrific loss, given the war with heaven and the burning of Flower-Fruit Mountain. And then right after THAT, it seems DBK emerged from the underworld, and so Sun Wukong was put into a horrific position: either murder his sworn brother, or let him continue to rampage & harm and/or kill who knows how many humans. SWK ultimately gives up his staff to do the repeat of “500 years under a mountain in solitary confinement route,” which as per JTTW he considers better than the alternative, but he immediately follows that by exiling himself. In JTTW SWK is a really sociable person who makes friends wherever he goes, but man, for this SWK...his life must at that point just feel like one failure after another, that in spite of all his best efforts he wasn’t able to save anyone he really cared about, and now he just trapped someone who was so important to him under a mountain & fated him to suffer the same things he had when he was in that position. How much more does he have to hurt his fellow yaoguai? How many more times does he have to choose between yaoguai and humans, feeling like no matter what he decides it’s just going to result in pain for him and/or his loved ones? I can easily imagine super sociable & easily upset (he cries a LOT in JTTW) SWK feeling like after sealing DBK, he just can’t do this any more. He just...can’t. 

This is all just speculation, but knowing the JTTW backstory between SWK and DBK does, at least for me, make their Monkie Kid relationship a lot more intriguing than it might be otherwise. Especially now that DBK seems to actually be making some small steps to quell his constant rage & lust for power. He even saves SWK and Qi Xiaotian from an explosion/nasty fall in the season 2 special! The Bull family weren’t really present in season 2, but I really hope they make a comeback in season 3 (if/when we get it) precisely because Red Son, Princess Iron Fan, and especially DBK have such an involved history with SWK. Plus it would be really fun to see two old warlords trying to awkwardly make amends with each other & struggle to be good teachers & positive role models to their student & son. 

In any case I feel this potential is more interesting than whatever fanfic The Six Eared “I’mma Plagiarize The Demon Bull King’s Backstory Of Being Best Friends with Sun Wukong” Macaque is creating lol. 

[hohoz]

The ones that suffer the most

I wanted to talk about this for a long time.

I’m a Resident evil addicted, I finished almost every RE game released and I must say that Capcom made some poor choices regarding Jill and Chris, they are EASILY the most mistreated characters in RE Franchise. 

But let’s explain why is that: 

Jill and Chris are survivors, they had to survive in a mansion with a lot of puzzles and zombies, while looking for items that could help them to progress and find a way to reach Brad. 

When they arrive at STARS Office, they are revolted that Umbrella did all that under their noses and innocents were dying because of that and they explained EVERYTHING in a report - but Irons made that go away. 

In the ORIGINAL RE3 we had this special file (Jill’s Diary) 

August 7th Two weeks have passed since that day. My wounds have been healed, but I just can't forget it. For most people, it's history now. But for me, whenever I close my eyes, it all comes back clearly. Zombies eating people's flesh and the screams of my teammates dying. No, the wounds in my heart are not healed yet...

August 13th Chris has been causing a lot of trouble recently. What's with him? He seldom talks to the other police members and is constantly irritated. The other day, he punched Elran of the Boy's Crime department just for accidentally splashing Chris's face with coffee. I immediately stopped Chris, but when he saw me he just gave me a wink and walked away. I wonder what happened to him...

August 15th Midnight. Chris, who has been on a leave of absence for a "vacation," called me so I visited his apartment. As soon as I walked into his room, he showed me a couple of pieces of paper. They were part of a virus research report entitled as simply as "G". Then Chris told me that, "The nightmare still continues." He went on to say that, "It's not over yet." Ever since that day, he has been fighting all by himself without rest, without even telling me.

August 24th Chris left the town today to go to Europe. Barry told me that he would send his family to Canada and then he would follow Chris. I decided to remain in Raccoon City for a while because I know that the research facility in this city will be very important to this entire case. In a month or so, I'll be joining with them somewhere in Europe. That's when my real battle begins...

For some weird reason this file isn’t available in RE3 Remake. 

But ok, here we see that Chris was doing some investigation - in the RE2RMK  you could see this letter that Chris left in a way that normal people wouldn't understand - the only thing that Claire says is that “doesnt look like him” but how normies would understand what Chris is like is he is not well represented in media ??????????????????

And Jill had all the detective work in her wall. 

So far so good - we understand the basics about them - they are Special police force, the elite, they had a traumatic experience and they survived to tell the story. 

Some problems until now:

Jill had a MAJOR personality change in RE3 RMK- I honestly like most of that, she is a badass in the originals and she is a badass in the rmk but I still dislike the fact that she swears all the time (specially because in RE1, RE Rev, RE5 she doesn't do that) 

We can tell a lot about her personality just looking at her room, but I still miss some stuff (I had expectations - so this is not a real problem. but still) like a Vinyl player (since she is probably into classical music), some letters from her father so new players can understand her origin and why is she so good in lockpicking and more about her dog (she had a pic in the original that could’ve been her boyfriend but it was replaced by a dog in RE2 rmk but in RE3 Rmk there in no dog) 

Okay - after you finish the game the only thing we see is this: 

In my opinion this is Chris since he is always associated with Green colors while Jill is associated with blue. 

So my speculation here is that she found him while in the original we had this: 

This is not a major chance but still is important (lore of course - duh) but the problem here is that while Jill is looking for him - Code Veronica is happening. 

So I can only assume two things, they did not show him because they DON’T HAVE A FACE FOR HIM or I am wrong and that is Jill, but if that is Jill so why there is no decent epilogue like the original ? 

Okay, now we are arriving in the real trouble area

I will do RE5 first and the Wii and Rev1 (even tho those two comes first in the lore) 

RESIDENT EVIL 5 

So before the game was release we had some propaganda, including this: 

So have in mind that Jill was dead, I thought that she died and RE5 would explain that shit. 

But in the beginning we see that Chris is looking for her and have in mind that Chris HAD A MAJOR CHANCE IN HIS APPEARANCE, and I’m not talking about his muscles. 

I will not address Chris in CV since he was good in that game but I the team that made CV also made the original, it had CONSISTENCE. 

Here we have Chris, he’s THE classical american soldier protagonist from Hollywood in the 80′s/90′s and he had some omage to TOPGUN

He also shares some traits with his sister

A major trait here is that HE HAS BLUE EYES, typical good looking soldier from US. 

and now let’s have a look at Chris in RE5...

Yeah... I still hate this face even tho I love his Character in this game, this ugly a** monkey looking mf and he had a lot of steroids

So we have some lore to him in RE5, Jill and Chris went to a mansion looking for Spencer (one of the fathers of Umbrella and the one that was behind project Wesker, he wanted to do this Virus so he could live forever, so RE has a good lore, it’s not just about zombies) but when they found him, he was dead and Wesker was by his side, in a fight Jill sacrificed herself to save Chris’s life. 

Chris started doing mission after mission because her body was never found, and he made a name for himself, he became a ‘legend’ inside BSAA and you can see that in the beginning of RE5.

The reason behind the muscles was probably to fight Wesker mano to mano but still is not well made, it really felt weird playing for the first time. 

So now we have a problem here, there is thing that you use in a narrative that is to make someone strong af powerless, and they did that to Jill. (a good example of this is in TWD- Ricky is a fucking legend and Negan made him powerless in the face of a event) 

Jill was used in a Boss fight and that is it... She is not in the game as a character, she is being manipulated and her whole design was changed, she looks like Nina from Tekken. WTF. - BTW, the fact that Wesker had mind control over her created 1000 fics of sex 

 So that is it, my main problem here isnt Jill itself, but it’s the fact that they used her character as a boss even tho she is the heroine, she never appears in RE lore again until some guy inside Capcom said “Well people are asking about Jill so let’s place a file in Rev2 saying that she is in rehab” 

The only time that she appears again is in a 3DS NINTENDO ONLY game, it felt that Capcom simply don’t care about her character. 

By the way Revelations 1 is a great game and was adaptable some years later for PC and consoles

But you think that this is bad, wait until we arrive at RESIDENT EVIL 6 

When I learned that Jill was not in RE6 I was mad... But after I played that game I said “thank you God” that game was bad, transformers kind of bad, it had bad writing, the lore was all over the place and Chris was the one that suffered the most in this game. 

He was responsible for the death of an entire squad, suffered amnesia and people still wanted him in the command 

THEY MADE HIM AN ALCOHOLIC 

The golden boy of BSAA reduced to THIS. 

By the way, the director said that HE WANTED TO KILL CHRIS IN THIS GAME to SUBVERT EXPECTATIONS - so if you liked Piers now that he died only because of that. 

So now let’s analyse what we know: 

The first 2 main characters are not well represented in media until RE6, they don’t know how to re introduce Jill in the games and Chris was reduced to a normal guy at a Russian bar;

But it gets worse... 

Capcom LOVE Leon, we know that. he is always the hero, he is the protagonist in almost every movie and he is always the cool guy so when he get’s a new model, he looks like this:

But When Chris get’s a new face he look like this: 

WHO DAFUQ ARE U, no offense to the model but he has NEGATIVE JAW LINE.

And still he doesn't look like Claire’s brother, there is no blue/green eyes and he looks younger that he was in 6 (and 6 still uses that ugly character model) 

But let’s go in the lore- we HAVE 0 info on Jill in RE6 / RE7 and no sight of her in RE8 

And speaking of which, they tried to make Chris the bad guy in the trailer so when we play we see “Ohhhh he was not the bad guy, that happened and that is why he did that” 

But still... 

If they are going to do that to his character don’t use this character, shit ! Do something with that Wesker’s son that made 0 sense in RE6 but leave Chris out of this - it really feels that they simply don’t know how to treat him right

And you may think that I may be complaining a lot because of his appearance

But this is him in RE8  

(to me this is some random dude from Russia) 

And this is him in RE:Verse (that is going to be release TOGETHER) 

So this tells me that they have 0 clue of how to handle his looks

Jill got RE3Rmk but it felt like a cheap game compared to RE2Rmk where the original RE3 was SO MUCH BETTER

And this is bad because there are so many new fans joining the fandom only to see 2 great characters suffering from poor director’s choices. 

I’m sorry about this rant, if you like Chris face and looks its okay, really, but dont tell me that Chris from 5/6/8 is the same from 1/CV and if you think im wrong about Jill its fine, but she is an amazing character that could have so much more impact in RE universe (I mean, she never even appeared in a RE movie - animations) 

But it’s sad to see so many characters that receive good representation in media and good games/lore while Jill get’s almost none and Chris is handled like random face guy. 

I was going to talk a little bit more about Rev 1 and RE Umbrella Chronicles but there is no need since Im mad right now and it seems that Capcom has 0 interest in making Code Veronica and Umbrella’s fall after that since their fav boy Leon need a rmk in RE4 even tho RE4 is not that old. 

Bonus:

Fun fact: Chris served in the Air force, so yeah, to me even Tom Cruise looks more like Chris than Chris from the games

[primoredial-jade]

JADEEEEEEE I'm sorry to hear that Ayato also has you in his clutches. If you find out any way to at least be less down bad, please let me know too :""""">>>>>

the way he just took over my brain without noticing and making me pull for him!! And making me want to write for him instead of his retainer thoma!! Unforgivable!!

And now Ayaka's banner looks so menacingly at me because I planned to use my extra wishes to pull for her. Now I can't pull for her because I need to keep my remaining wishes for Kazuha.

But if you have any brainrot about Ayato, I'd love to listen to u talk about it if you'd like (dms, asks or discord, whichever you prefer hehe). I will be with you by your side until Ayato decides to let us go </3

Also I just read your post about your extensive writing assignments. All the best for it and remember to watch out for your health too. Drink more water, don't skip meals and sleep as much as you can. You can do itttt <3

(This is Sherry's main btw, I wasn't sure if I ever mentioned it to you and I hope I didn't cross any lines and make u uncomfy with the ask)

replying to the lovely sherry <3, ayato brainrot of me basically keyboard smashing for like 50% of the post, mayhaps ayato fic in the works that has been keeping me up at night (gasp?!) utc :]

SHERRY <3 thank u for sending in such a lovely ask, absolutely nothing to be worried about regarding crossing lines or anything like that!! so so happy when i see you on my dash :D

GOSH.... ayato omg idk what's wrong with me. a few weeks ago i said i wasn't going to be pulling for him to save some primos for kazuha's rerun. and by all means, from what i saw from leaks and stuff ayato looked super super cool!! just wasn't really what i needed +++ i wasn't immediately smitten with his character design, and i think that is my own fault for having such high expectations for literally monthsss before his release.

but then. oh no. oh god. i played his story quest.

wait. was he always this handsome? with quite the character to boot. can't lie, my type in fictional men are ironically tend to share the common traits of being cunning, smart, strong, handsome, rich, elegant, and PARENTLESS LMAO (diluc.... yeah.) ayato pretty much checked out a lot of those traits and i was like oh my gijrfjjwfjsjfd???????????

i was steadfast in my decision not to pull, i am capable and i will resist the temptations of this man!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!........................ and then. the fanfics started coming out.

and this is why i love the genshin fanfic writing community so so much. they expand the characters into different situations and scenarios and they are SO good and it makes you fall more in love with a character and that is exactly what happened to me.... so i pulled for him aHHHHH

and omg about AYAKA. i freaking love the kamisato siblings and their relationship so much. that promotional video of ayaka getting her vision literally made me want to cry it was so good... the way ayato looks lovingly at his sister with pride and joy GAHHHHHHHHH they do something to me... i really want her too but i dont think i can afford to pull anymore ;o; so we are on the same boat right now, and we must stay strong sherry!!!! kazuha will come!!1.... soon... i hope.. hah :,]

i've actually had a little idea festering in my mind these past few days regarding ayato... new fic incoming?!?!?! set in the canon genshin universe but reader is arranged to marry ayato for political and/or convenience reasons. ayato and reader never meet before the arranged marriage, but when reader gets the proposal, they are embarrassingly quick to accept. i mean, it's the kamisato ayato. who wouldnt!

still, reader foolishly thought it wouldnt be a completely loveless marriage........ that is, until they realize they never see ayato since the day they were wed. he is always busy dealing with other matters and can never find the time to build the relationship between them. it is a sad marriage, but reader stands tall and takes their position as the yashiro commissioner's spouse very seriously. they get a lot of things done............. an encounter happens where reader confronts him about his absence. sum talks happen then their relationship slowly evolves.. and that's as far as i have thought about thus far!!!

+++ i’m also thinking of titling it “drawing our moments” as they go through the process of being an arranged wedded couple :D

let me know what u think!! im like getting jittery about it because i want to write about it but cant really find the time to sit and hunker down about this yet, but maybe in a few more weeks!! i will return to this and really start :Thinking:

thank u sooooooo much for ur kind words sherry, i am so appreciative and you do not know how much what you said at the end means to me!! i will be sure to take care of my health these ongoing weeks, and i hope you do too!!! <3 <3 <3

[codenamesazanka]

oooh, I think I just lost like 7 followers immediately. was it the Deku hate post. It's true. I very much dislike Deku as protag. as a character. as lines on a paper, even.

I've said before, I wanted to like him! I usually like the main character of a shonen series (cuz they're supposed to be interesting and likeable). When I first got into the fandom, I found Deku alright - I was ready for all that tactical genius and hard work and deep empathy, all the plucky shone protag tropes. I went onto a fanfic reading binge before even reaching season 2 - all the fics recommended on TvTropes, the fics with the most kudos on Ao3; and because I'm an AU-fiend, I binged a whole bunch of the 'Midoriya Izuku Has a Quirk', 'Villain Midoriya Izuku', [Insert Trait Here]!Deku fics. I am not picky.

But like tbh, I think there's a reason why so many of these fics had Deku be dealt with a worse hand in life than in canon - whether it's having a powerful and deadly quirk, or being orphaned, or being abused, picked up by Villains, etc, etc (basically, Shigaraki Tomura's backstory given to Deku instead...) - plus him being smarter, or much more timid and shy, or broken, or darker, etc. It's cuz Deku is a blank, enough that even his fans needed to change him, even beyond the typical power-ups or fanon traits given to make a character a 'BAMF'.

(also funnily enough, it's those same AU fics that got me interesting in Shigaraki Tomura, despite their best attempts at dismissing him as a minor Villain or making him a shrieking, insane five-year-old. Every fic, Shigaraki shows up, doing all the stuff he does in canon, even though he supposedly is too dumb to accomplish anything. Every fic, Shigaraki will become the League's leader, despite no one - not even Kurogiri - liking him or thinking he's qualified. It was clear Shigaraki is important enough to must be a factor in the core canon storyline on which AUs were built upon; the chain of events demanded his presence, so fanfics dutifully allowed him to stay, even as they had no idea what to do with the character or just straight up disliked him and it showed through the writing. "Here's a fic is telling me he's insane and childish and no one likes him and AFO would soon as much throw him away; but the wiki is telling me he's successor to the Big Bad and the show is dedicating half the Stain arc to him. weird." Anyways, that got me deciding to restart the whole show, while reading the manga, paying more attention to the villains and man was it worth it.)

[windblooms]

matchups.

hihi :’) way overdue – but here are the matchup requests that i received.  please check for yours below if it was sent in!  ctrl+f on desktop for your mbti/zodiac, or something you remember adding in if the post is too long to scroll through.

Hello! I'm INFP and 98% Type 4 & 92% Type 9. I'm a sun Pisces & moon Aquarius. I'm fairly introverted but can be kinda silly if I'm trying to be social. I'm also empathetic & sympathetic with plenty of self-confidence issues. My main hobbies are playing games, looking into social issues, thinking about game characters,etc. I keep bouncing between visions but Geo might be fitting since current Geo characters are a little more on the introverted side. Not sure if I'm late but wanted to try <3 I'm the INFP Pisces & Aquarius Geo asker and forget to mention that I'd like 1 platonic and 1 romantic!

romantic match-up: kaeya.

although it might be odd at first to pair him with a sensitive and introverted soul such as yourself, on the contrary, kaeya won’t have any issues relating to your emotional nature, even if outwardly it doesn’t seem so (behind his light-hearted and diplomatic dialogue, he’s got a transactional relationship with the knights he’s “loyal” to; his own brother is distasteful towards him; and he’s got an agenda that goes against everything he currently lives with.)  he’ll get a knack out of teasing you when the mood is fitting, and while he may not be the one to give you the best of pep-talks, his self-assured disposition does have its uses: confident words soothe over the creases of your worries and troubling thoughts, and when things are more light-hearted, the two of you will bounce off of each others’ playful mannerism.

platonic match-up: barbara.

barbara is a sweetheart who’s incredibly devoted to both her companions and her aspirations.  wholesome and energetic, she’s sure to keep you on your toes dancing, whether it be about how beautiful it is outside or the potential of a rainbow after a storm.  while she’s a clear extrovert, barbara is also insightful to the feelings of others – after all, an idol must understand her crowd! – so she’s sure to dial down the energy if you’re ever feeling weary that day.

hihi !! can i please submit myself for the matchups ? i'm intp-t, scorpio sun and leo moon. i'm 5'11, female, and am described to be a very energetic person. i like to think optimistically and have a special love for philosophy and chemistry !! my hobbies include reading and writing - i've also recently picked up baking. i think i would have a hydro vision in genshin - hydro users tend to be healers, and i think that's something i would specialize in. can i please have 2 romantic matchups 🥺

i'm the scorpio sun leo moon intp matchup ask !! i forgot to mention that my enneagram type is seven, sorry 😔

romantic match-ups: childe/tartaglia and jean. 

childe hyperfixates on individuals he deems strong.  while this usually translates into people who have experience on the battle field, in your case, he finds it admirable that you’re able to keep up with so many hobbies and interests.  your thirst for new experiences and stimuli is akin to his own sense of adventure, and your devotion to each and every one of them resonates with his own conviction to his aspirations.  you’re strong mentally, and when you interact, he always has to dedicate himself to you fully in order to keep up; there’s never a dull moment when you’re around him.

a workaholic in denial, jean’s position as acting grand master never gives her a break.  she’ll insist that she’s fine, that she’s content with her oversight of the knights, that they are her priority.  and while this is true, when you talk about how your interests range from chemistry to baking, it’ll remind her of the time she doesn’t have to do “normal people things.”  again, not that she’s miserable with the knights, far from it – it’s just that your life and spontaneity reminds her of the things outside of the knights that she wishes she could do, too.  your genuine energy never fails to make her smile – perhaps you were who she’s been waiting for.

hi, congrats on the 1k followers! i really enjoy your writing and i’m glad to see that you’re doing well! i hope the rest of 2021 goes well for you!

for the matchup event, i’d like one platonic and one romantic relationship. i'm an infp, 6w5, scorpio sun and virgo moon. my attention span isn’t the best and i’m an impulsive dumbass, but i still manage to get good grades somehow. i try to be sociable, but i have a habit of clamming up so i usually just end up sticking to the people i know. i’m kinda all or nothing with the effort i put into things; i run out of steam pretty easily so i tend to leave things unfinished, which i hate, but sometimes i’ll go wild and finish a semester-long project in one afternoon. overall, i really like helping others and being seen as reliable! i was really dependent on others in the past, and although i still kinda am now, i’m trying to be someone others can depend on.

as for hobbies, i mostly just play video games and scary stories. i’m also into a lot of crafts, particularly knitting and bracelet-making. i find the motions relaxing, but i enjoy it the most when i have someone to make things for.

as for my vision, i think hydro suits me best because it seems more support-oriented overall, which is the kind of role i’d like to have. however, that doesn’t mean that it can’t be used to do some serious damage if needed.

has lots of energy that’s hard to direct, but can plow through things they set their mind to.  likes security of things they know, and wants to give security as well.  creative outlets.  seems a bit finicky?  but insightful with their own emotions. 

romantic match-up: mona.

outwardly stubborn but inwardly self-critical, mona has dedicated her entire life to the stars, and it shows: her masterful grip on astrology is nothing to scoff at, and she’s arguably the most practiced mage in all of teyvat.  at first, she’ll be baffled at your impulsiveness and “lack of focus”: how will you ever get anything done? she’ll wonder.  but when you prove her time and time again that you can plow right through an obstacle just like scissors through paper, so long as it seizes your interest, she’ll take moments to think about her own outlook on life.  when she realizes your comfort in abstract, artistic past-times, she might ask cutely for you to teach her.  surely, if she can talk to the stars, she can make bracelets . . . ?  o-of course they’d be for you!  who else would they be for, if not someone she deems endearing.

platonic match-up: beidou. 

the personification of a tidal wave, beidou’s ferocity hits hard and leaves a mark.  the two of you will find it easy to bounce off of each others’ ideas – maybe even concerningly so to the rest of the crew – and hell, she might even sway you to sneak into a hilichurl village to steal some carrots if it’ll provide for some overdue fun.  lots of  pats  slaps on the back, and she’ll always beckon you over when she learns about something new, thinking that you might find it interesting, and when she wants someone else’s input.  she trusts your judgement like family, and knows that you’ve always got her.

hi! i would like to request a genshin character matchup (2 romantic). my mbti is infj and enneagram 2. i am a cancer sun and aries moon. i am calm and reliable, but i do have a mischievous side and use a lot of dry humor. when it comes to having fun, i like to enable others! i am also deeply passionate about community service. my hobbies include yarn crafting. my genshin vision would be cryo because i am highly motivated by love/emotion, can come off as cold, and love the ice aesthetic! tysm!

romantic match-ups: diluc and lisa.

often broody and contemplative, diluc has a whirlwind of thoughts in that hard head of his.  through your first interactions, he’ll piece together your intense devotion towards your loved ones and willingness to help others.  he’ll warn you that you should take time to consider yourself, too, and that it shouldn’t always be give, give, give, but those same traits in you that he worries about are the same qualities that draw him in.  once, too, he was as uninhibited as you, had the same energy.  perhaps it’s because you’re both so similar, both in internal hopes and mannerisms, is why he finds it easier to loosen up – even if he doesn’t immediately let go of that deadpan attitude of his when he knows you can come back just as hard.

she’s enthralled by your willingness to engage in her banter.  often, those she teases (flirtatiously or otherwise) leave with a red face and an adorable stutter, but it just so happens that you’re one to fluster her instead.  it’s been a long time since she’s met someone who can keep her guessing, yet is incredibly insightful to themselves and those around them.  she finds your qualities of fun and sincerity to be charming.  you’re a breath of fresh air compared to the stern knights she’s around all day, and she looks forward to meeting you after work, conversing with you as you walk down mondstadtian streets and eat over dinner.  there’s never a dull quip from your lips, and she’d love to hear everything on your mind.

hii hope I'm not making this too hard on u lol one romantic and one platonic please! either gender is fine I'm bi as Hecc mbti: enfp-t sun taurus moon aries I think my vision would be cryo because people say it's connected to loss and I've lost some pretty important people to me and also. I hate the heat I really like cards, wolves and the stars, my hobbies include working with robots and the general aesthetic of the mid 2000s, my favorite season is winter and I love buying ppl gifts ♡

platonic match-up: chongyun. 

immediately, your avoidance of heat and affinity to the calm will give him someone to relate to, and your attraction to the abstract will pique his interests.  (perhaps, once he’s become more confident with his exorcist abilities, he could pick up some of your hobbies?)  your practicality, in contrast to his often self-critical mindset, will ground him in times of need, and he’ll always ask you if he can help you out in return.  while he looks up to you as an individual, he’s honored to also be your friend, or at least someone you devote time to.

romantic-matchup: ningguang.

you both understand sacrifices and loss.  while it’s a rather bleak realization upon getting to know each other, your rationality and perseverance despite the past stirs her respect for you; your mindsets are incredibly alike, and she’ll often input your reasoning into her plans, and deem you a trusted associate of the liyue qixing.  in her demanding position, you are someone she can readily relate to and rely on.  in times when things are less hectic and the two of you can more freely relax, she’ll indulge in a shopping spree with you.  as someone who’s intimate with her in both profession and emotional relations, she’d love to show her gratitude. 

hi! i'd like to participate on the match up event!

i'm an infp, and also type six on the enneagram test, my sun sign is aries and my moon sign is pisces. i like arts in general with my favourite ones being music and painting, but i also enjoy writing and i spend a lot of time songwriting! also as a person i'm rlly clumsy and i kind of look mean bc of my resting bitch face lol. i think my vision would be anemo because i think it can be really useful in many ways and i like the reactions it has with other visions. i'd like two romantic match ups! i hope this was understandeable, as my english isn't the best. thank you! 💌

romantic-matchups: mona and zhongli.

mona will find your interest in the arts intriguing.  you always seem to get ideas at the most random of times, often startling her with how active your mind is.  and despite how she doesn’t reply much in return – she’s not versed in words or drawings, even if she won’t verbally admit it – you seem to be satisfied with her . . . reactions?  even if the most she can relate them to is astrology, it seems to be enough for you, so long as she isn’t uptight that day.  your creativity and attraction to the abstract gives her comfort: there aren’t many people in mondstadt who appreciate her profession, so even if you aren’t into the exact same things, she’ll at least know that there’s someone who looks forward to seeing her.

on his quest to “learn what being a human” is, zhongli encounters a myriad of occupations.  typically, the people of liyue are wound up with economics and realism, but your joy in the possibilities – how you can convey your emotions, through what mediums – of life has to offer reminds him of humanity.  with you, he’ll explore what mortals call “the small things” in life: akin to the spark of appreciation for flying lanterns, autumn-colored lights at night, feelings of wonder – that’s what you instill in him. 

hello!! id like a matchup please!! im an INTP-T and im Type 5,, im capricorn sun and libra moon. im a reserved person and kind of angry all the time,, and i get overwhelmed easily. im not that good with affection,, but me actually welcoming you into conversation or my room or smthn, or actually responding to you means something. im just scared to be open with affection because its always done me wrong in the past. anyways,, id like a platonic matchup and romantic matchup please!! thank u and congrats!!🥳🥳❤️❤️

hello,, im that Capricorn sun libra moon anon,,, very sorry to disturb you,,, but i didn’t mention what my vision would be!! i think id be pyro,, ive always been a bit cold or i usually shun people away,, so i think id be cryo!!!! or maybe hydro because im constantly having a mental breakdown LMAO(but i fr think id be cryo)

platonic match-up: sucrose.

while she’s constantly on-edge from work, sucrose will always make time to check on her dear friend.  after all, you do the same for her, even if you insist that you might not have the right words ready.  “partners in stress,” kaeya would teasingly dub the two of you as, but you don’t pay mind to him.  as quiet and reserved individuals, you find tranquility within each others’ company.  

romantic match-up: venti.

whimsical and regarded as a mere bard by most, venti puts up a convincing front.  but it’s just that: a front.  the real venti is concealed by a chipper voice and mercurial agenda, when underneath, there’s a solemn musician who’s burdened.  you’ll most likely be off-put by his facade, as he’s trained himself to constantly be lively – comes with being a performer – but will soon find that he understands your turmoil.  he’s not the best with sentimental words, but will instead convey his sympathies through strums of his lyre.  while it isn’t obvious that there’s security in freedom, he’ll be sure to encourage you that there’s a way.

Hello Al! For the match-up event would it be possible for me to ask for 1 romantic and 1 platonic? As for my MBTI I am an INFJ-T. As for the ennseagram I am 98% type five and 90% type 6. I am a Taurus sun and an Aquarius moon. I tend to come off as polite and often times a bit shy/reserved irl. I love learning new things. Conversations that have all parties thinking critically are definitely my favorites. My hobbies are writing, drawing, learning new things, reading, and playing video games. As for Genshin vision I'd have to say cryo. I've taken a quiz on quotev and got a tie between cryo and anemo. Cryo's description seemed to fit my personality better. I also seem to have a connection with the cold. Let me know if you need any more info. Remember to take care of yourself. ~Taylor💙

platonic match-up: albedo.

you both have your inquisitive sides, and albedo is more than willing to talk to you about his discoveries.  while he might not proactively reach out to you – more like, if you’re nearby, and he happens to catch you peeping at his work, he’ll engage with you.  he finds your takes thought-provoking and your candor respectful; a fellow of agreeable disposition, your calmness and supplementing nature also makes it easy for him to work.

romantic match-up: zhongli.

both intuitive and practical in your approaches, zhongli’s given a new perspective when you converse, or at least, a new thing to ponder over.  many regard him as stiff besides his gentlemanly disposition; your focused and insistent care will enrapture him as heartwarming, that there are “acceptable” vulnerabilities, but they’re not weak points at all – far from it.  your security and assuredness is harmonious with your emotion insight, making for a stable lifestyle that he easily molds into.  the conversations that the two of you engage in are nothing short of provocative.  just as much as he learns from you, he also provides with tales of the old days. 

Is - is the matchup thing still relevant? If not you can just ignore this message - its ok, i know ur busy :)

If it is still on tho, i wonder if i could get a platonic and romantic one?

Im a INFP-T(??), Type 4, pisces sun sag moon.

Im a dumb nerd with big glasses who loves t shirts with puns ot jokes on it. Im not sure about my hobbies, i just like anything that can make me think - memes, books, music, games with lore. I dont like boring, overly normal stuff. I have shitty sense of direction and i suck at math.

I think that my vision would be anemo since thats (i think) an element that requires both creativity and knowledge to work with, which is very special and interesting to me.

Thank you so much in advance! Or sorry if i sent this too late 😅

platonic match-up: xinyan.

both of you are free-flowing and seek excitement.  you’re the gasoline to xinyan’s match: you both feed off of each others’ knack for new things, stimuli, and the bold.  you could be walking down the streets of liyue, eating bags of mora meat, and then suddenly run down to the northern wharf to catch passing boats and playfully debate over which snobby aristocrat is being shipped off.  there’s never a dull moment between the two of you, and the plan is always no plan.  spontaneity is the name of the game, and it’s one that you can go at for ages. 

romantic match-up: beidou.

there’s hardly a moment to breathe on the crux fleet, that’s for sure.  be prepared to explore the entirety of teyvat with beidou, because she’s got you covered with all of your “new thing” needs, alongside your ocean-borne family.  she’ll find it humorous that you’re not practiced in navigation – ironic for a seafarer.  but steering is complex, and she’d gladly help you out in learning, just another thing to do in a day’s work. 

Hi! For the match up event, I'm 98% type 3 and a 97% type 7, I'm am Intp and my moon sign is scorpio, my sun sign is Pisces. I'm above than average in math and I like to draw from time to time, I've tried to learn the ukelele but ultimately failed. I'd like my vision to be an electro cause my fav color is purple and I like how the electricity sparks and stops my enemies, I'm also a fan fic writer and love manhwas

Hi! I'm the last anon that you reminded that should have put 2 romantic in the ask! Sorry about that, it just completely flew over my head

romantic match-ups: ningguang and childe/tartaglia.

your ambition knows no bounds, and your drive is a force to be reckoned with.  some may call your approaches headstrong, but your ability to take initiative is something that ningguang greatly admires.  it’s something she professes that you two have in common – granted, even if her economic tendencies are more cutthroat.  while the two of you have incredibly firm opinions that might send shocks across the room you’re debating in, ningguang trusts your rational thought and explorative mindset.  your like-mindedness, in this instance, brings great relief to her in her position.

childe is also someone who would take interest in you.  he’s not one for schemes like the rest of the harbingers, and would appreciate your straightforward approaches and the focused energy you put into each project/obstacle you face.  it makes it easier for him to speak his mind, and he’ll find comradery with you fairly easy to come by.  gradually, the zeal the two of you share can draw you into more adventures, and he’ll have someone he can call a trustworthy partner. 

Hello! For your generous match-up event, could I request two romantic matches please? My MBTI type is INFP and my enneagram type is four. My sun sign is Aries and my moon is Gemini. I am a quiet but curious person who can be really flirty and sarcastic in private. I am very caring to those I love. My hobbies including writing and drawing. For my vision, I think I would be cryo? I’m a secretive person who has trust issues and can be cruel. I love your blog, you’re so skilled! Thank you so much!

romantic match-ups: kaeya and jean.

you’re a trusted soul by all, even if many also regard you as reserved.  kaeya isn’t one to grow attached (it’s hindered him in the past), however after being paired with you on multiple missions, he’ll feel more at ease around you due to your good nature.  your duality is also a breath of fresh air, and each time he talks to you afterwards, he’s reminded that there are individuals who have others’ best interests at heart.  many knights will catch the two of you tossing jokes back and forth at each other, but for once, kaeya isn’t trying to swindle anybody. 

the acting grand master has a lot on her plate, but she finds that when she’s in your company, the tray is a little lighter.  she relates to your sincerity and good intentions, a welcome refresher in the world of forced diplomacy and tedious hours.  you also seem to know just the right things to say to lighten the mood, with a cute smile to top it all off. 

hello! Could I request 2 romantic match-up? I'm ENFP, enneagram 2w3. Sun Sagittarius, Moon Scorpio, Asc. Virgo. My hobbies consist of anything generally creative, gaming/anime, hanging out with friends esp!! I'm the type of person to show affection by physical touch and by gentle ribbing-- I love making other people laugh. I'm always down to do things, new or not, and an honest and easy-going person. My Vision would be Geo bc I think it reflects how I am as a person-- stable n loyal :) thank u!!

romantic match-ups: venti and beidou. 

no one would’ve thought that you and venti would be a pair – then again, when they consider your tendencies for jokes and charisma, it’ll all come together.  wherever the two of you go, laughter follows, like dandelions in the breeze.  venti hits it off with you almost immediately after you meet, your natural social nature enabling easy conversation.  you’re also very zealous with topics that pique your interest.  it’s a genuine, eager curiosity that he can’t help but consider endearing.

the two of you are always searching for new things, be it small islands in the horizon or neat little specialties that you manage to catch in the corner of your eye.  there’s never a dull moment when the two of you get going on ideas, and while you may be the more rational, beidou will always insist on adding some more “zest” into whatever you come up with.  if you push her, she might accidentally shove you off the boat with the playful enthusiasm of a golden retriever. 

Hiya~! Thank you both for doing this! For the character match-up, I'd like to request two (2) Romantic please lmao, with a side of French fries.

I'm an INFP, Libra sun/Scorpio moon. My external personality might lead ppl to think I'm a charismatic extrovert, but that's the face I show for the 5 whole minutes I'm socializing, and then return to my introvert turtle shell for the next week. I cycle through hobbies since I get bored quickly, but I always come back to music since singing is my passion. I know for sure my Vision would be Anemo bc I need to be free to feel comfortable and tend to react rather aggressively when I feel restrained 🤔

I'm deeply emotional, sometimes impulsive, and dislike relying on others. I tend to be cat-like in my affections... sometimes I Love, other times Do Not Want. Except for animals, they always get my love ❤ ehehe....

romantic match-ups: mona and kaeya.

mona considers your nature incredibly easy to grasp.  but don’t take it as an insult or offense – in fact, your simplicity is a constant in mona’s life: you like time to yourself, and when you’re alone is when your energy comes out.  she doesn’t have to worry about reading too much into your feelings when she can see that you’re independent.  your interactions are calm and reassuring; she doesn’t have to be uptight around you, because she knows you trust in her abilities and lifestyle, and security with herself and those she cares about is her top priority. 

kaeya’s able to relate to your social tendencies.  there’s a front that he puts up in front of his colleagues (purely for professional purposes) before reverting back to his natural state of mind.  he finds your distance understandable, and considers it something the two of you have in common.  when you talk one-on-one, it’s easy to bounce ideas off of each other about mondstadtian culture and other topics of interest; while your independent natures may lead to some time apart, there will always be fresh experiences waiting when you do meet again.

[visceralcoma]

Fic Writer Meme

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I got tagged by three lovely fellow writers:  @cartadwarfwithaheartofgold @5lazarus​ and @paraparadigm So I shall tag two more, pardon if you’ve already been tagged by others.  @thereallonelyagain and @chocolatecatcupcakecheese.

Name:  Call me Coma, though my username is visceralcoma - do not refer to me as “visceral” thats not the “given” name part of my username. That’d be the “last/family” name part of my username. Ya dig? 

Fandoms: I have many and I don’t have them all listed on my fandoms page.  But the main ones I write for are Dragon Age, Cyberpunk 2077, Greedfall, Harry Potter, and MCU. My MCU stuff is under a different username on Ao3 because that fandom is.... a special kind of crazy, toxic, drama/wank filled. More so than Dragon Age and I am sooo not up for dealing with them on here.

Most popular oneshot: If we’re going off kudos/likes/reblogs... that would be my Mass Effect Andromeda one shot between Sara Ryder and Jaal, called Static Love. 

Most popular multichapter:  That would be my Self Insert fic, By the Tits of My Ancestors. A Modern Character in Thedas fic that explores Kirkwall’s crime underbelly, specifically the Coterie and finds a connection between Caribbean mythos and Dwarven mythos of the Titans - all wrapped up in a tale of the MCIT finding her way in Kirkwall while trying not to mess up the timeline of the games and utterly and spectacularly failing at it.

Actual worst part of writing: oof... I would say...two things. First is the romance. Though my discord fam assures me that I write romance well. but I don’t get how given what I write is just people getting close in a platonic way with some sex/smut mixed in. I’m largely romance neutral (unsurprising given I’m aromantic), I don’t recognize things as immediately romantic - even in fiction (books/movies) I don’t really see the difference between doing those actions for a romantic partner and doing them for platonic friends. I... don’t get it.

Second is I absolutely hate hand waving. I will do everything in my power for there to be some sort of scientific reasoning/logic behind something - even if the reader never fully knows it or gets an exposition dump - but so long as I know it. And for magic, it HAS to have rules. Things cannot JUST happen because I need them to. And Magic is the worst thing for me to write because so many stories/media that have magic just... don’t have hard fast rules. Ya heard of Hard Science, well I like Hard Magic. There must be rules  and consequences for breaking the rules - to explain WHY there are rules.

How You Choose Your Titles: It’s a mixture of a pun, something funny, a latin phrase, an idiom that I’ve twisted, or just some... feature in the story I latched onto as the common theme or motivation of my protagonist.

Do you outline: Sometimes. I start with a very basic outline and a vain hope I’ll keep to a specific number of words for the whole piece or chapters but I never do. Outlines are really good for figuring out my heading (using sailing metaphors), in where I’m going. Even if it’s not my eventual destination. But it gives me somewhere to start.

Ideas I probably won’t get around to, but wouldn’t it be nice?  Too many... I could never list them because my greedy self will feel compelled to write and post more than 5 chapters of it, and never finish (as if I ever finish any multi chapter fic). I have folders upon folders of ideas half written, chapters started, dialogues mapped out, expositions dumped and worlds drafted. 

Callouts @ Me:  Learn to Finish a Fic!  Lol. thats about it. Everyone bemoans STARTING a story... but I will forever live in the purgatory of learning how to finish a story.

Best writing traits: My best writing traits, in my opinion is action. Its one of the things I find easiest to write - and most fun because I get up and act out the fuil sequence. Figure out how the body should move - whether a specific attack is even possible to happen after the prior.

Spicy Tangential Opinion:  If you intend to be a fanfic writer, do yourself a favor and never participate in fandom spaces beyond being just a writer. Or if you must... do so under a different username than your author name and keep them separate.  You’ll save yourself the headache of fanpol attacking you for whatever slight you made and then attracting hyper-critical haters to your works that will make you doubt and question your ability  or hold you up to whatever fool’s gold standard they have of “righteous” and “pure” topics you’re allowed to write about.

[grayhouse3]

SJTR is my villain origin story

So I finished Stalking Jack the Ripper.

Originally I told myself that I was going to just stick it out and read the next one (“Oh, it’s about vampires and Dracula. It’s probably more fun. You can forget all about the pain this one inflicted on you"). No. I got 12% of the way through and had to DNF. So here are my messily compiled thoughts on the book, basically expanded from the last post. Honestly, kind of feel free knowing I won’t be writing more about this series. (Also I am adding some TWs down below but don't know if I am doing them right!)

More on the exoticism, weirdness with Audrey Rose's Indian mother, and the British Empire:

In chapter 14, we read, "Dark strands of hair were piled atop my head, my eyes more mysterious somehow with the dark liner, and my lips were the bright crimson of freshly spilled blood … I thought of my mother and the saris she’d brought me to wear from Grandmama’s homeland. I felt just as stunning now as I did then, and the memory warmed me.” I am still trying to figure out why Maniscalco made Audrey Rose mixed race. Why is Audrey Rose’s grandmother from India? Literally, what did it add to the story? Was it nothing more than just a cute lil quirky fun character trait to her? I don’t think I missed any key moments where there were important conversations about race, imperialism, British occupation, etc., mostly because Audrey Rose’s father (a big fancy rich lord) is a white man and because Audrey Rose is white-passing. I can’t recall any moments in the book where she faces the realities/consequences of being a socially mobile POC WOMAN in LONDON IN THE 1880s. Honestly, if someone else can point out a passage I glossed over or explain some nuance I missed I would actually really appreciate it, because this drove me CRAZY.

(Audrey Rose and her brother also go visit a circus in town in chapter 15; of course these events existed purely for England/colonizing countries to exercise and display their power and to exoticize/exploit the communities/cultures that they came into contact with. Audrey Rose sees silks, beads, etc. that remind her of her grandmother’s saris, smells the foods of her family’s “homeland,” etc. Also in the same chapter there’s this great scene where her brother is describing their mother and father’s marriage: “Grandmama told me she’d refused him twenty times just for fun,” Nathaniel replied. “Said he squirmed like a cobra in a basket. That’s how she knew he was in love.” Uhhh … Is that supposed to be romantic?)

On the feminism stuff:

I am too *gestures vaguely* to write much more on this. Yeah, it’s heavy-handed. Yeah, it’s cringey. But at the end of the day, it’s not really that harmful, I guess. Here’s just a fun sampling of some of my favorite lines from the book:A few of my favorite bites from the book:

***“close-minded society” (chapter 21) Okay

***"Why turn a murderer of women into front-page news?” (chapter 15) Bro do you know how the media works

***"But what of her [mother’s] insistence that I could be both strong and beautiful? Surely Father had to be wrong.” (chapter 21) Yes girl you are strong and beautiful!

***"There would be no skirts or bustles to wrangle with anymore. I was through with things confining me” (chapter 22) Ugh down with corsets just another tool of the patriarchy amirite

On the violence against women, weird classism, and stuff about prostitution:

I was bound to be uncomfortable about a lot of this because I have weird feelings about true crime stuff, and this is historical fiction set around the Jack the Ripper murders. It was going to go sour somewhere.

Consistently Audrey Rose wants to be sympathetic, but is unable to connect all the parts of this situation together: she struggles to imagine the women (very real-life victims) beyond their lives of prostitution, poverty, squalor. When she does, we see something like this: "The women he murdered did matter ... They were daughters and wives and mothers and sisters” (chapter 28). Oftentimes she wishes she could continue to cut cadavers open in peace (women in science!) without having to think about how those cadavers came to be on her examination table: “I needed to get away from those women and their tragic lives before my emotions got the better of me” (chapter 25). Perhaps Maniscalco deserves more credit here, and perhaps I’m just being a bitch, because Audrey Rose is a very privileged girl and her actions and thoughts make that clear. It’s just that the conclusions she comes to in the name of feminism, justice, etc. weren’t at all satisfying to me.

Also: OH MY GOD. Oh my god. There is this one moment that is BRANDED AGAINST THE GRAY MATTER OF MY BRAIN FOREVER and I will never forget it. At one point, Audrey Rose and love interest Thomas decide the best thing they can do is go out and—yes—stalk Jack the Ripper. To do this, they know they need to “blend in” with the crowds in East End. So … like … cosplaying as poor people? Audrey Rose manages to find and wear the dress of ONE OF THE MURDER VICTIMS (long story short her medical doctor uncle was in a relationship with this woman and when she died he acquired her worldly possessions). It’s like, so fucked up, I can’t even describe my reaction when I read it. In chapter 25 we read, "The dress was a little too old, a little too ragged, a bit too big. If I were to wear this ghastly dress out, I’d look as if I belonged in the East End, begging for work to feed my addictions … It was absolutely perfect.” Oh my god. And THAT’S NOT EVEN THE WORST PART. While they’re “stalking Jack the Ripper” on this incredibly stupid mission, the two main characters just … make out in an alley. Like, okay. People are being murdered and you’re wearing a dead woman’s dress and you suspect your father of being guilty, but yeah, that kind of stuff makes us all a little horny. Super relatable. Absolutely no concept of reality or consequences or anything at all.

Another random note on class: I noticed the only time Maniscalco writes in dialects/accents, she’s writing seedy/working-class characters. Not saying this is a problem unique to Maniscalco’s writing by a longshot, but ... something to think on. (I think it’s ingrained in a lot of author’s writing habits/minds at this point.)

Weird stuff about the dad, the brother, and what justice means to Audrey Rose:

I had to add a whole new highlighting color for this stuff!

Any growth Audrey Rose might’ve shown over the course of the novel—anything about how these women mattered, and how they deserved justice as any “highborn” individual might, simply by dint of being humans—goes away when she and Thomas come to the conclusion that the Ripper murders must have been committed by Audrey Rose’s father. She realizes her moral dilemma when she contends with the harsh reality: if her father is the Ripper, can she turn him into the authorities? Audrey Rose worries how that might impact her own moral virtue: "They’d hang Father. Given who he was, they’d make it as public and brutal as possible. Just because blood might stain his hands did not mean I wanted his on mine. No matter if it was right or wrong” (chapter 24). First of all, BITCH. You have to. You have to report this kind of thing. No ifs, ands, or buts. I HAVE to imagine Maniscalco’s intended audience would feel the same? It’s? Serial murder? Second: Audrey Rose, baby, sweetie, honey. This is just a reminder that ACAB. I actually don’t know a whole lot about how the late Victorian criminal justice system functioned, but something tells me her family's public outlook would’ve been less bleak than she imagines here.

Lucky for Audrey Rose, her dad isn’t guilty in the end—but her brother sure is. He’s a mad scientist, using the brutalized bodies and souvenirs of his victims for Frankenstein-style experiments. Ultimately, he wants to reanimate the corpse of his and Audrey Rose’s long-dead mother, and he believes he can achieve this by transplanting fresh organs into ? Her dead and decomposed body? The thing is that, this moral dilemma persists for Audrey Rose—and her dad, too. He pressures her not to bring the little matter of Nathaniel’s issue—you know, his casual murder of a number of local women—to Scotland Yard: “They’ll have your brother hanged,” he said quietly. “Could you honestly watch that happen? As a family, have we not suffered enough?” (chapter 29). Nathaniel electrocutes himself to evade capture by the authorities, and Audrey Rose and her father feel relief. The book ends by confirming that "Lord Edmund covered up Nathaniel’s involvement, I didn’t ask how. One day I’d let everyone know the truth, but the pain was too raw now” (chapter 30).

((Side note: Listen. I knew Nathaniel had something sinister going on from the GET-GO (I’m not trying to be obnoxious) because he basically started some nighttime vigilante group called the Whitechapel Knights of Justice or whatever bullshit, I don’t know. All I know is that my red flags IMMEDIATELY started going off because that sounds exactly like the terrible and awful Crusader cosplay clubs from my (bad) Catholic childhood, where everyone thinks they’re a knight for Good but really they’re the bad guy.))

Overall, kind of ...

I think one of my biggest issues with this ending was … You have already stepped into a realm of fantastical revisionist history here in writing such a fictionalized version of these real-life events. (I know Maniscalco is far from the first to do it.) That means that the rules you are playing by are essentially your own—evidenced by the liberties she points out in her Author’s/Historical note (dates changed for convenience or storytelling purposes, real-life individuals changed for narrative purposes, etc.). So WHY would you not conclude this fantasy retelling of the Jack the Ripper murders by meting out some form of justice? I hear the counterargument: "Well, because we still don’t know the culprit today. This book would ring hollow if it named someone since historians, forensic scientists, etc. still don’t know who committed these crimes." My question: is that really a problem though? This is a work of fiction. Nothing in history happened the way it is written here. Is it crueler to the women who were murdered and who remain spectacles for true crime junkies and authors like this, less satisfying to readers who want some more concrete kind of closure, to not offer that up? I am asking this in earnest here, because I don’t know. Maybe it is insensitive to make up a murderer, to fill in the gaps in order to make sense of the violence that happened. But in my brain it feels almost like a responsibility at this point, since these murders served as the backdrop for the romance between Audrey Rose and Thomas, for the background to Audrey Rose’s empty feminist diatribes, and as inspiration for a book that went on far longer than it needed to. To me it kind of feels like the least an author could do, but I have no clue.

Anyways, I'm just glad I get to put this series to bed. No more.I truly lost sleep over it this weekend. Onto something better, please, for the love of god.

[simschallenges]

Chinese Zodiac Legacy Challenge

(note: because the original poster has deactivated, i am reposting an archived version of the challenge rules retrieved with the wayback machine. all of the following text is a copy of the original post by @autumnalpixels.)

Thanks to the idea from an anon on tumblr, I’ve decided to make a second version of my zodiac challenge that focuses on the Chinese Zodiacs.

For those who don’t know, the Chinese Zodiacs are representative of an entire year, not a month. So, for example, I was born in 1997 and I am born in the year of the Ox. Twelve years in the future (2009) was the next year of the Ox. The zodiacs are similar in the way that they each have certain personalities and whatnot, but unlike the Western Zodiac, the Chinese Zodiac uses animals to represent each of the twelve main personalities, rather than planets.

As far as I’m aware, I don’t think this challenge has been made, and I’m thankful for the anon’s suggestion to make this! The original was really fun to make, and I hope that everyone enjoys this challenge as well. This is also going to be a 12-generation legacy, with each generation representing one of the different Chinese Zodiacs.

Side note: This legacy is not meant to misrepresent or offend anyone. The generations are being based off of descriptions of the zodiacs from this website. Feel free to read up more about each zodiac to get a better sense of your sim’s personality! I greatly encourage you to research the signs more because they are very interesting.

Starting out:

Feel free to make your founder however you’d like. Traits for each heir will be listed in their section, but their looks are up to you so feel free to get creative! You’ll start out like a traditional legacy on one of the 50x50 lots (or 64x64 if you’d like). Here is a link to Pinstar’s legacy rules.

General Challenge Rules:

Honestly this is the only way to fail the challenge, other than not producing an heir.

Generation One: Rat

“With strong intuition and quick response, those born in the year of the Rat always easily adapt themselves to a new environment. With rich imaginations and sharp observation, Rats can take advantage of various opportunities well. Rats have strong curiosity, so they tend to try their hands at anything, and they can deal with it skillfully. A lack of courage, as well as good command skills, Rats are not capable as leaders. Opportunistic and picky as Rats are, they do not have broad minds, but a narrow view. Rats are kind, but sometimes impolite to others. People of the Rat zodiac sign usually sleep late, for mice are nocturnal animals.”

You can say you’ve never really been the time of person to commit yourself to a certain thing. Whether it be a romance, a job, a hobby, whatever; point is, you get bogged down if you’re forced into doing the same thing too often. You are intelligent and talented, but you bore easily and like to learn and experience many things at once, despite how overwhelmed you get. You can be kind of insensitive sometimes and can come across as rude or that you think you are better than others, but in all reality you are a bit of a coward and are just shy and prefer to avoid confrontation. You’ve always wanted a family, but can you handle it?

Traits: Noncommittal, Genius, Loner Aspiration: Renaissance Sim Career: Due to your aspiration, you’ll be changing your job a lot, so you can pick.

Goals:

Complete your aspiration

Max four skills of your choice

Don’t get married, have at least two children with different partners.

Date around a lot, go on at least one date a week. Each date can be with the same person or different people, up to you!

Feel free to have a hobby that can make money (painting, writing, gardening); you won’t be making much money at the beginning of this generation due to needed to job hop

Generation Two: Ox

“Oxes are known for diligence, dependability, strength and determination. Having an honest nature, Oxes have a strong patriotism for their country, have ideals and ambitions for life, and attach importance to family and work. Having a desire to advance and great patience, Oxes can achieve their goals by consistent efforts. They are not influenced by others or the environment, but persist to do things in accordance with their ideas and capabilities. Before taking action, they will have a definite plan with detailed steps and add their strong faith and physical strength. So people of the Ox zodiac sign enjoy great success as a result. The most disadvantageous trait in Oxes is poor communication skills. They are not good at communicating with others, and even think it not worthwhile exchanging ideas with others. They are stubborn and stick to their own ways.”

Stubborn, persistent, overbearing. Many of your classmates would have described you that way, but you personally like the words ambitious, overachieving, and powerful to use for yourself. You can be a bit of a know it all and tend to stick to your beliefs, even when they’ve been proven wrong. However, you have grown to learn how to convince others to believe what you say (even bordering on manipulation at times). Outside of convincing people of things, however, you loathe conversing with others and would much rather spend time doing the things you enjoy, which includes working hard at your career. You grew up in a family that didn’t have the greatest time with careers, as your single parent had several careers throughout your childhood. You don’t want that. You want better for your children; to have enough money to see them succeed. But although you do truly love your children, you don’t get attached to others easily and they are no exception. You want them to succeed and do well, but you aren’t there for them when they need you because you are working. How will this affect the white picket fence family that you wanted?

Traits: Ambitious, Self-Assured, Loner Aspiration: Successful Lineage Career: Critic

Goals:

Complete your aspiration

Max your career (either branch)

Max the Logic skill and one creative skill (painting, cooking, guitar, whatever you’d like)

Get married at a young age to your high school sweetheart. Start having kids immediately, four in total. You don’t get along with your spouse and fight a lot, but you’re not allowed to divorce them. It would ruin your white picket fence fever dream.

Never become more than “friends” with your children (i.e. good or best friends).

Make your children do their homework every night and all school projects; children must have A’s in school before they can age up to teen.

Teens must have a job and at least a B grade in school before they can age up to YA.

Become good friends with all of your grandchildren.

Generation Three: Tiger

“People born in the year of the Tiger are brave, competitive, unpredictable, and self-confident. They are very charming and well-liked by others. But sometimes they are likely to be impetuous, irritable, and overindulged. With stubborn personalities and tough judgment, tigers work actively and boldly express themselves, and do things with a high-handed manner. They are authoritative and never go back on what they have said. With great confidence and indomitable fortitude, they can be competent leaders. They will not make preparations for anything, but they can handle anything that comes along.”    

Even though you don’t want to admit it, you grew up a lot like your parent. You’re stubborn and confident as well, but you tend to want to work with others and crave social interaction. You want to be the best, but not in the same way as your parents; you want to have it all: a good career, a loving spouse and children, and a great social life. You enjoy get togethers and parties, and you are very popular amongst your coworkers and friends. Some would even say you were the leader of the pack.

Traits: Outgoing, Self-Assured, Hot-headed Aspiration: Party Animal Career: Detective. Once you reach level five of the career, quit your job and become a politician.

Goals:

Complete your aspiration

Max the Politician Career

Have at least a silver medal on each kind of party

Get married, have a kid, then get remarried and have more kids (number is up to you.)

Have 1 BFF and three Good Friends

Be the leader of a club with eight sims and buy all of the Clothing and Decor perks, display them around your house

Generation Four: Rabbit

“Rabbits tend to be gentle, quiet, elegant, and alert; quick, skillful, kind, and patient; and particularly responsible. However, they might be superficial, stubborn, melancholy, and overly-discreet. Generally speaking, people who belong to the Rabbit zodiac sign have likable characters. When meeting trouble, Rabbits can handle it in an orderly way; when encountering tough difficulties they are never discouraged, but are persistent to seek solutions. So they eventually achieve enviable success. Rabbits are faithful to those around them, but reluctant to reveal their minds to others, and have a tendency to escape reality. They are too cautious and conservative, which means they miss good opportunities.”

If there was ballet, you would have done ballet since you were a child. You are graceful and calm, but you have your moments where your insecurities take over you and you can become a bit gloomy. You love the arts and are more of a homebody than your parent, and love spending hours reading and writing stories and poetry. You are generally a positive person and enjoy having a small group of friends that you can go get coffee with and discuss books, rather than attending parties. You can be a bit skittish, though, and you like the finer things in life. There’s a side of you that you hide from the people you know, however; you may just not be as sweet and innocent as you seem.

Traits: Bookworm, Gloomy, Materialistic Aspiration: Mansion Baron Career: Criminal

Goals:

Complete your aspiration

Max the your career (either branch)

Have two good friends

Marry and have five children with the same spouse

Do not let anyone find out about your career. If they do, you need to get rid of them. Threaten them, erase their memory (if you are an alien), or kill them off. No one can know who you truly are.

Buy something new (worth at least 500 simoleons) every week

Generation Five: Dragon

“Among Chinese zodiac animals, the Dragon is the sole imaginary animal. The Dragon is the most vital and powerful beast in the Chinese zodiac, although with an infamous reputation for being a hothead and possessing a sharp tongue. In ancient times, people thought that Dragons could control everything in the world with their character traits of dominance and ambition. Gifted with innate courage, tenacity and intelligence, dragons are enthusiastic and confident. They are not afraid of challenges, and willing to take risks. However, the dragon is sometimes regarded as aggressive, and angry dragons are not open to criticism. They don’t consider themselves irritating and arrogant. Instead of following tradition, they strive for a smooth future.”

Your parent made you sick. Being a criminal and being so materialistic was not how you wanted to be like, so you rebelled at a young age and, as a teen, ran away to start your life anew. The only things you took with you were a few photographs of you and your siblings, and some things of your parent’s that you could sell for cash. You can be a bit reckless and impulsive, and you don’t like thinking things through, tending to follow your gut rather than your brain. You want a big family like what you came from, but you were going to make the money to raise your kids honestly.

Traits: Hot-Headed, Good, Outgoing Aspiration: Big Happy Family Career: Retail Store Owner

Goals:

Complete your aspiration

Max the your career (either branch)

Max Charisma skill

Run away as a teen, starting over. (You don’t have to bring family photos with you, but you do have to bring the Knight of the Octagon Table and other things with you that you can sell. Do not sell the Knight of the Octagon Table.)

Cannot go to school except on Wednesdays and Thursdays. Must do homework every night, however, and remain at least a C grade in school.

Open a retail shop once a YA (can sell whatever you’d like)

Get married halfway through young adulthood to a friend from high school

Have four kids

Have a garden with at least four perfect Dragonfruit plants

Generation Six: Snake

“In Chinese culture, the Snake is the most enigmatic animal among the twelve zodiac animals. People born in a year of the Snake are supposed to be the most intuitive. Snakes tend to act according to their own judgments, even while remaining the most private and reticent. They are determined to accomplish their goals and hate to fail. Snakes represent the symbol of wisdom. They are intelligent and wise. They are good at communication but say little. Snakes are usually regarded as great thinkers. Snakes are materialistic and love keeping up with the Joneses. They love to posses the best of everything, but they have no patience for shopping. Snake people prefer to work alone, therefore they are easily stressed. If they seem unusually stressed, it is best to allow them their own space and time to return to normal.”

You grew up to be a very laid back and easygoing person. You love nature and you know the value of a dollar, which can sometimes lead you to being a bit frugal. You are also a bit of a hoarder and love collecting things, and if someone even brings up getting rid of something, you aren’t too pleased with them. You are seen by many as wise and intelligent, and you definitely are. You are in tune with yourself and the natural world around you. You are very mysterious and a private person however, so while people spill their problems out to you and you help them, you don’t tell anyone about yourself.

Traits: Vegetarian, Materialistic, Loves Outdoors Aspiration: The Curator Career: None

Goals:

Complete your aspiration

Max Wellness skill

Keep all of the plants from the last generation and expand the garden to include at least four perfect orchid plants

Do not hire any services; everything must be done by your sims. (Exception: babies can be sent to daycare while your sims are at work/school or on another lot.)

Complete any collection.

You must be BFFs and know all of your partner’s traits before you can be romantic with them.

Have two kids.

Generation Seven: Horse

“People born in a year of the Horse are extremely animated, active and energetic. Horses love to be in a crowd, and they can usually be seen on such occasions as concerts, theater performances, meetings, sporting events, and parties. With a deft sense of humor, Horses are masters of repartee. They love to take center stage and delight audiences everywhere. Sometimes, the Horse is a little self-centered, but it doesn’t mean that s/he can not be interested in others’ problems. Horses are really more cunning than intelligent, and that is probably why most Horse people lack real confidence.”

You were that kid in school. You know, the one obsessed with horses. Your favorite toy was a horse, and you carried it around with you everywhere. Eventually you grew out of this horse phase (thank god) but you still loved the roots that the past few generations had of living off the land and running a farm. You are energetic and fun to be around, and you love to joke around and make people laugh. You found out by the time that you were a teenager that the farm life wasn’t for you, and you decided to focus on something that you were good at: bringing joy to other people through witty jokes and karaoke fails. You love seeing others happy, but at what expense?

Traits: Goofball, Gloomy, Active Aspiration: Joke Star Career: Entertainer

Goals:

Complete your aspiration

Max your career (either branch)

Never get married, have a one night stand that results in pregnancy

You can have a live-in datemate, however, but you two can never actually get married

Write in a journal every night

Go jogging for an hour every day

Max comedy and charisma skills

Pass down your favorite horse toy to your only child

Generation Eight: Goat

“People born in a year of the Goat are generally believed to be gentle, mild-mannered, shy, stable, sympathetic, amicable, and brimming with a strong sense of kindheartedness and justice. They have very delicate thoughts, strong creativity, and perseverance, and acquire professional skills well. Although they look gentle on the surface, they are tough on the inside, always insisting on their own opinions in their minds. They have strong inner resilience and excellent defensive instincts. Though they prefer to be in groups, they do not want to be the center of  attention. They are reserved and quiet, most likely because they like spending  much time in their thoughts. Goats like to spend money on fashionable things that give them a first class appearance. Although goats enjoy spending money on the finer things in life, they are not snobbish.”

You are not a snob, per se, but you definitely have an eye for the expensive, lavish ways of life. You love to spoil your spouse and your children, and enjoy giving gifts. You just can’t help that you want to appear wealthy, even if you aren’t. You are kind-hearted and love volunteering with your family to make the world a better place.

Traits: Good, Creative, Art Lover Aspiration: Painter Extraordinaire Career: Painter

Goals:

Complete your aspiration

Max your career (either branch)

Become an art collector (have one room on the house dedicated for all of the pieces of art you’ve either made or bought)

Master Painting skill

Volunteer with your family once a week

Paint a portrait of your spouse and your children

Marry and have three kids

Generation Nine: Monkey

“People born in a year of the Monkey have magnetic personalities and are witty and intelligent. Personality traits like mischievousness, curiosity, and cleverness, make them very naughty. Monkeys are masters of practical jokes, because they like playing most of the time. Though they don’t have bad intentions, their pranks sometimes hurt the feelings of others. Monkeys are fast learners and crafty opportunists. They have many interests and need partners who are capable of stimulating them. While some like the eccentric nature of Monkeys, others don’t trust their sly, restless, and inquisitive nature. Although they are clever and creative, Monkeys can’t always exhibit their talents properly. They like to accept challenges and prefer urban life to rural.”

Traits: Goofball, Genius, Foodie Aspiration: Chief of Mischief Career: Tech Guru

Goals:

Complete your aspiration

Max your career (either branch)

Move to San Myshuno as a Young Adult (take the Knight of the Octagon Table statue with you)

Max the Programming, Mischief, and Handiness skills

Learn all of the new recipes from City Living

Earn the Spice Hound and Chopstick Master traits

Marry and have two children

Make sure all of your children learn all of the recipes you’ve learned

Generation Ten: Rooster

“People born in a year of the Rooster are very observant. Hardworking, resourceful, courageous, and talented, Roosters are very confident in themselves. Roosters are always active, amusing, and popular within a crowd. Roosters are talkative, outspoken, frank, open, honest, and loyal individuals. They like to be the center of attention and always appear attractive and beautiful. Roosters are happiest when they are surrounded by others, whether at a party or just a social gathering. They enjoy the spotlight and will exhibit their charm on any occasion. Roosters expect others to listen to them while they speak, and can become agitated if they don’t. Vain and boastful, Roosters like to brag about themselves and their accomplishments. Their behavior of continually seeking the unwavering attention of others annoys people around them at times.”

Traits: Self-Assured, Active, Dance Machine Aspiration: Vampire Family Career: Entertainer

Goals:

Complete your aspiration

Max your career (opposite branch from generation seven)

Make and run an athletic club, purchase all of the energized mood perks and the fitness skill perk

Max fitness and dancing skills

Become a vampire because you are obsessed with your eternal youth

Only have one biological child, but adopt twins

You can choose to get married or not

Generation Eleven: Dog

“Dogs are loyal and honest, amiable and kind, cautious and prudent. Due to having a strong sense of loyalty and sincerity, Dogs will do everything for the person who they think is most important. As Dogs are not good at communication, it is difficult for them to convey their thoughts to others. Therefore, Dogs tend to leave others with the impression that they have a stubborn personality. Born with a good nature, Dogs do not tend to be criminals or seek dishonest gains. They just need a quiet life and a good family and, therefore, forget the ugliness and evil on Earth. Dogs are always ready to help others and do not care about their own interests, but if they find themselves betrayed by cunning people they will feel shocked and hurt. When thrown into doubt, Dogs think the world is evil and complicated. Then they criticize sharply when giving comments on something, and infer all things are according to their pessimistic point of view.”

Traits: Bro, Good, Gloomy Aspiration: Soulmate Career: Athletic

Goals:

Complete your aspiration

Max your career

Fall in love with a human and cure your vampirism to be with them

Stay married to one person, no matter what

Own several dogs (Pets EP)

Have a “pack”, aka four to five friends that you can really trust

Be BFFs with your spouse

Have four kids

Generation Twelve: Pig

“Pigs are diligent, compassionate, and generous. They have great concentration: once they set a goal, they will devote all their energy to achieving it. Though Pigs rarely seek help from others, they will not refuse to give others a hand. Pigs never suspect trickery, so they are easily fooled. Generally speaking, Pigs are relatively calm when facing trouble. No matter how difficult the problems are Pigs encounter, they can handle things properly and carefully. They have a great sense of responsibility to finish what they are engaged in.”

Traits: Good, Glutton, Loves Outdoors Aspiration: Soulmate Career: Culinary

Goals:

Complete your aspiration

Max your career (either branch)

Have a garden with one of every plant (excluding plants from GTW and OR)

Max cooking, gourmet cooking, and baking skills

Host a gold level dinner party every Friday

Have a large amount of friends (at least three)

Never marry, but adopt one child

Oh wow, we’ve made it to the end of the challenge! I hope you enjoyed. Feel free to show me pictures or update me on your playthrough on this if you’d like (tumblr: autumnalpixels.tumblr.com/twitter: @absoluteking8). You can also use the hashtag #autumnalchinesezodiac so I can see your posts and reblog some of them!

If you have any questions or suggestions, feel free to tell me and I’ll take them into consideration. <3

[stop-breaking-my-heart-telltale]

I Need to Talk About “Problematic Faves” within TWDG [3/?]

Character design, being drawn towards characters we find visually attractive, and how big of a role in plays in our feelings towards them.

“He's a murderer but like.... a cute murderer, y’know?”

This goes hand in hand with the whole first impressions thing we’re talking about, but rather than talking about the character’s traits, dialogue, history, and overall character, we’re talking about physical appearance.

This is something I want to touch on even though I already know the answer to it. It’s just a food for thought sort of idea that I wanted to explore given how much we talk about our favorite characters appearances while discussing them with one another.

Let’s face it: We’re all a little shallow at some point in our lives.

“Don’t judge a book by it’s cover” is bullshit. I pick up that book in the first place because it’s pretty and has sprayed edges. The only reason I put it back it is because I can’t find an actual summary of the book because publishers think we want to read a bunch of “Best book of da year!” by Who The Fuck Cares written all over the place rather than an actual summary...

....What was my point?

Oh, right, character design.

When we’re first introduced to a character, we immediately make a judgement of them based off their looks.That’s not to say that our opinions remain the same based on our first impressions after only looking at them, but it’s something we do initially. 

Game developers, artists, writers, and directors will usually strive to make their characters as visually appealing to us as possible because that’s what makes us go “ohhh they pretty *picks thing up.*” 

There are issues that develop from this, such as unrealistic expectations of what true beauty is and how it actually affects the audience. After taking in so much of this content, I started to wonder if it had any affect on why we have “Problematic Faves” and if there IS something linked within the way we view them as physically attractive. 

While I believe that appearance is an important factor in character development and is what draws us to them, it’s also a bit more complicated than that.

One of the many things I adore about the final season is it’s character design for all the students at Ericson. All of the Ericson kiddos have their own unique looks and manners of which they hold themselves.

Sure we’ve got Louis and Violet, who we all gush about all the time on how beautiful they are. How many times have we talked about Louis’ freckles or Violet’s eyes or just how gosh darn pretty we think they are while incorporating it into writing our fanfics or headcanons or creating out artworks of them?

But what’s great is that they aren’t all “conveniently attractive” or someone a shallow Hollywood director would look at one time and say “there’s our star!”

Willy is a fan favorite among many in our community. What I love about his design is his teeth. He’s a kid growing up in the apocalypse without proper dental care. His teeth are crooked, there are gaps between them, and he’s even missing some. If that same Hollywood director were to look at him, they’d either slap some extreme braces on him or cast him as a tree troll. 

But not everyone has those perfectly straight pearly whites. Some of us have crooked teeth, or we’ve had painful braces to try and straighten them, or we’ve lost or broken a tooth at some point. You know how refreshing it is to see a character as likable as Willy show up with that smile of his while still being considered a fan favorite? 

Speaking of refreshing, what about Ruby? Everyone loves Ruby. She’s not tall and thin, she’s short and thicker. 

I remember seeing nasty posts questioning why someone like Aasim would have any interest in her because of the way she’s built, and that that pisses me off. 

It’s so damn great to see someone like Ruby portrayed the way she is in this game. As someone who IS more on the shorter and heavier side, it’s hard to find a character like this who doesn’t suddenly become slim therefore “prettier” over the course of the story or who isn’t a terrible or whose weight and build is all their character is. The last movie I watched that featured a plus size main character was that god awful Sierra Burgess movie on Netflix and that character made me want to punch things. 

All I can say is thank god for Ruby.

Speaking of which, how about Omar? He’s short and stocky, too, but y’know what? We made this dude a GOD. What does that tell you?

These are examples using more minor characters that fall into that non-”Problematic Fave” tier, but what about our characters that do?

I used to have a strong theory that some characters got more love and attention JUST because they’re more attractive to the audience, even if their character is boring, holds little to no plot relevance, or is an “evil” being beyond forgiveness.  

It’s a theory that I believe still holds some truth, though I think that truth lies more with the younger fans, or those who aren’t quite as mature. 

As someone who has worked around elementary school children, as well as 13-14 year olds, I think I can safely make the assumption that they tend to take things at face value a good chunk of the time.

Pretty person = Good!

Not pretty person = Bad!

That sort of deal. 

So, the question I pose is:

Does a character’s level of attractiveness have an effect on our willingness to forgive some of their more problematic behaviors?

I’m sure most of you read that and said “Uh, is this a trick question? No?”

When you think about the kinds of stories that we’re always told about the beautiful princesses who are pure and good and the ugly stepmothers who are evil and bad, it’s not hard to see why the younger ones would see things as more black and white rather than a shade of gray. 

If the pretty princess poisons her “evil” stepmother during their morning tea, how easily do we forgive her just because we’re told that she’s a pure, pretty princess? We know poisoning someone is bad, but... if the stepmother was ugly and evil, then the princess must have had a reason for doing this, right? So... it’s okay... right?

Is the princess justified in her actions, even if the stepmother wasn’t doing anything more than drinking her morning tea?

I look at that and say, “No,” whereas a much younger person might say, “Yeah. The stepmother was evil.” 

Young children are fascinating to talk to, by the way. They’re sponges who absorb knowledge like you wouldn’t believe but somehow they still take everything at that face value and believe whatever the “good” person says in a story until you help them see the bigger picture. That’s why they tend to be more susceptible to falling for twists. 

But once you explain to them the more complicated elements of the princess and the stepmother, they’re intelligent enough to grasp that the princess is wrong. 

I believe once we grow older and open ourselves up to more complex stories full of gray characters, learning about them through experience, we start to see that beauty isn’t just in the eye in the beholder, but also that it doesn’t mean shit at the end of the day. 

You can have the most beautiful person in the world be your main character, but if that beautiful person drowns a bag full of kittens, suddenly they aren’t so attractive, now are they?

One of a kid’s favorite example of a good-looking antagonist is Hans from Frozen. 

While I think the whole “he was actually evil the whole time haha we fooled you” thing in that movie is garbage, I give it credit for being the first exposure of this concept to young kids, sending them down a path of looking at different characters they see in a new light. 

We like characters who are attractive because, well, they’re attractive. But we’re  also mature enough to know that their attractiveness isn’t solely based on their appearance. It’s merely the seed that only grows with development, personality, and an arc. It only makes up a small portion of why we like a character in the first place. We know that just because someone is good-looking, it doesn’t justify their actions. 

But for those who are still growing out of those black and while fairy tales and just starting to expand their views of different characters while learning that looks can be deceiving, are they more likely to forgive a character or not fully understand that they’re in the wrong just because they’re visually pleasing? 

Another example outside of TWDG that I can give you is Nathan Prescott from the game Life is Strange. I’ve mentioned this game several times before, and even wrote a whole segment on it in my Louis and Violet essay from a while back. 

When I was a young lass, I picked up this game and really liked it. I wasn’t as into it as I am TWDG, but I liked it enough to play every episode as it came out and then check the tag to see what everyone thought. 

While browsing this tag, I noticed that a lot of the fan base seemed young. Makes sense, it IS a game starring teens set in an academy setting and I was young, too. 

But with that, one thing that always bothered me was how a number of young people talked about Nathan. 

Nathan who, if you haven’t played the game, is one of the antagonists. They would gush about this kid, seeming to make up excuses for the appalling things he did and it felt very tied to his looks. 

I’m sorry to any Life is Strange fans who might’ve been one of these young fans... but that really is the impression I got at the time.

Maybe I just didn’t get the hype about this dude who drugged girls so he could pose and take pictures of them because of his weirdly under-explained relationship with the surprise villain of the story, but he doesn’t seem like the type of guy to get all “Poor, precious, beautiful baby boi didn’t deserve this !” about. 

Then again, if writing this has taught me anything, I might have missed something by not being involved with that fandom, but what I gathered was that he didn’t become the redeemable character they all thought he would be and they didn’t like that, so it becomes harder to try and justify the things he did because he didn’t end up being good in the end even though they all thought he would be. I guess. 

But, gathering that a lot of them were so young and going off the content I predominately saw... I don’t know. It didn’t ever feel right. I had suspicions that lead to this theory. That’s what I’m saying. 

This can apply to other fandoms, too, where a group of people will take a character/person they find attractive and gush about how pretty they are rather than anything else that makes them interesting. Not everyone, of course, but I get the feeling you all know what I mean and have come across something like it before. I’m just trying to explain it. 

Or maybe it is just me and you have no idea what I’m talking about. 

Either way. 

Returning back to our “Problematic Faves,” lets ask this question about them in particular. 

How much of David’s attractiveness plays into my love of him? 

I mean, he’s not a bad looking dude. In fact, I dare say that the Garcia brothers are both very attractive guys. I give ‘em both a 10/10. 

But does that actually aid in my actual feelings towards him at all? 

What about the others we’ve talked about so far?

I don’t see many people talking about how pretty they think Kenny is... though his mustache IS majestic and that’s something we all agree on.

And Lilly’s okay. I guess. 

Nate could be a good-looking dude if he’d just put his crazy eyes away.

I believe our best bet it in getting a more clear answer to this question would to be take a quick look back at Minerva.

Remember how I said Minerva was so hyped up based on a two second appearance in the ep3 trailer? Granted, we did have more than JUST her appearance to form this hype around.... but admit it, a huge part of the hype was how good she looked.

She looked awesome.

Hell, just seeing her had me excited to see what she would do in ep3, even though I had the feeling she wouldn’t be an ally.

I used to have a hard time wrapping my head around why so many people love her as much as they do, and I previously thought it was based a lot on her appearance.

Is it ignorant and shallow of me to think y’all loved her based solely on her looks?

Probably. Yes. Yes, it was.

Now that I’ve looked into this further, I see that there’s more to the love and interest surrounding her, but..... it’s kind of what my first thought was? In the beginning? 

Either way, it’s still an interesting idea to consider when thinking about a character you love.

With that said, what if we apply this question to a character who is less of a “Problematic Fave” and more of my “God Tier Fave.”

You all know that Louis is my favorite character across ALL the games. My love for him is vibrant, but one of the many things I love about him IS his character design. He’s a visually appealing guy, and his personality, different traits, dialogue, flaws, and character arc only build onto the attractiveness of his character.

If Louis didn’t look like this, would I still love him?

Assuming that everything else about him is the same, then yeah. 

What if the developers went with the concept art of him that looked like a odd Harry Styles knockoff? Would I still love him?

Again, I want to say that I would, assuming that everything else about him be the same. But going with that certain concept art does take away an important aspect of his character and his relationship to Clementine.

Many of you have told me how much you appreciate the fact that Clementine and Louis represent a sweet, healthy black couple. That’s important to all of us. If we went with the first concept art, then that’s something we’d lose. Would we still ship clouis? Probably, but again, that important element and representation is lost and that would affect our overall opinion of it, even if just a bit.

But, what if Louis looked exactly as he does now, but were to do something awful? Would I still love him?

Well, my first instinct is to say, “Yes.”

In ep3, Louis tells us that he purposely broke up his parents marriage because his father wouldn’t let him take singing lessons. He broke into his father’s credit cards and made it look like he had a mistress, then made sure his mother knew about it. He did this over the course of a year. Then, when the divorce was finalized, he threw his father’s words back in his face: “You get to be happy or you get to be rich. You can’t be both.”

Knowing this, I still love Louis.

What he did was awful, but the reason I don’t hate him or even like him any less is because of how he acted while telling us. You can feel the guilt and remorse in his voice, the shame that he was once a person who thought that was okay to do.

He did that a long time ago, he learned from this terrible mistake he made, went as far as to punish himself by taking on a irresponsible, piano-playing jokester persona who anyone rarely ever took seriously. Louis changed for the better and he’s still a likable, relatable, lovably character despite this.

But in order to dig a little deeper into this idea of attractiveness and just how far we’ll go to try and justify a character based solely on their looks, I then thought:

 “Okay, then consider this: What if Louis and Minerva switched places with him doing all those things she did that made me dislike her? Would I still love him?”

And things got a little complicated.

Because my immediate first thought was “Yes.”

That shocked the hell out of me.

Why the fuck would I be okay with LOUIS acting the way Minerva did, but not MINERVA herself? That makes no sense.

Louis betraying us on the boat by knocking Clementine out and locking her in the cell isn’t suddenly okay because it’s LOUIS.

Louis showing up on the bridge to try and murder Tenn isn’t suddenly okay because it’s him and not MINERVA.

The reality is this: If Louis and Minerva traded places, I wouldn’t love Louis. I don’t care how attractive his character design is, I would feel the same way about him that I feel about Minerva. I love Louis for who he is within the context of the canon game, but if Louis traded places with Minerva, he wouldn’t be that Louis that I love.

The problem with asking myself this is I know Louis’ character and I want to think the best of him. I’m attached to him. I don’t want to imagine him doing anything that horrible because I know that would be an breaking of his character. His appearance has nothing to do with it. 

But my first instinct was to side with him. 

That’s when it all came together.

A character’s appearance is important in the first impression, but our perception of that character’s attractiveness is only elevated or lowered based on the important things: personality, backstory, relationships, flaws, fears, regrets, change, and complete character arc. 

So how does this apply to my love for David?

Well, it eliminates any possibility that I only like David just because he’s pretty.

Perhaps I’m not so shallow after all.

Yeah, that’s the conclusion of this segment: something I already knew. But, I felt it was a concept that could spark some thought about what attractiveness really means while debunking any idiots who may grasp at straws with the insult of, “You only like [blank] and excuse their toxicity because you think they’re hot!”

... except the Life is Strange community might come after me for implying a nicer version of that towards one of the antagonists... but hopefully you understand the point I was attempting to make in bringing that up as an example.

I like David’s design, but him being an attractive dude isn’t why I like him. If anything, his looks being appealing to my eye is at the end of my long, complicated list of why I like him.

Conclusion:

Looks matter initially, and our perception of a character’s attractiveness is either elevated or lowered based on the more important qualities of their character, problematic or otherwise.

[continued in 4/?]

[writtenbyhappynerds]

Fanfiction 102: Unit 1, Villains

        Welcome back to class! The topic of villains came up while writing Fanfiction 101. The Editor and I consider villains important. They are the most important characters in a narrative because it is their actions and their choices that shape the plot, the desires of the main character, and their actions. Usually, in fanfiction, you already have a villain. If you write Harry Potter fanfic, your villains are Voldemort, Umbridge, Snape, Lucius, etc. If you write Supernatural fanfic, your villains are Crowley, Lucifer, Chuck, etc. We can acknowledge that for most fanfic writers the most you’ll have to do is accurately capture the voice of a villain so you can replicate them for your story in a way the audience will believe. This is done by studying the character and taking care to not reduce the villain to a one-note trait of their personality. However, we see lots of fanfic writers add in their own villains; these are usually secondary or minor characters. Sometimes they are backstory villains only, or sometimes they’re just bullies meant to be an added antagonist. These villains, because they are all your own, need to be the most important characters in your stories, and that’s why we’re here to talk today.

          Villains are the most difficult to figure out. When you write a villain, you are writing a character and explaining to yourself, and therefore the audience, not only why this person is a bad guy, but why they’re doing bad things. I do not like villains who are Bad Guy McBadGuys that exist solely to make the OC’s life miserable. That isn’t a villain. That’s an asshole. These characters are the most common villains we see, and I myself am guilty of writing them in the past because we don’t want to give the bad guys thought. Usually, the writer wants to focus on the protagonist, but the side characters and opposing characters need way more thought than the OC. The OC’s motivations are easy to figure out. Their job is to complete the quest, save the day, and oppose the villain. Their entire goal as a character can be written around a villain, and when that happens you better be damn sure you know why the villain is doing what they’re doing. One-note villains are common in both Harry Potter and the Avengers. Usually, this is because the villain is either a Death Eater or HYDRA, and they can be bad for the sake of being bad because we know both groups are bad guys. I want you to remove yourselves from that approach. I would highly encourage you to read the comic series published a few years back called Captain America: Hail HYDRA. If you know Avengers you probably know this comic, because it’s the one where the writers tried to say that Captain America, God’s Righteous Man, has been a secret HYDRA agent this whole time. It was a whole Twitter moment, it was the #saynotoHYDRACap thing. That comic. In that comic, along with Captain America pledging his support to HYDRA, is an account from a character named Robbie Dean Tomlin. We as the audience follow Robbie’s story and see how a young kid can get wrapped up in an organization like HYDRA and get beaten and broken down to the point that he’s willing to become a suicide bomber for them. What Hail HYDRA can teach us is how to make a villain relatable, and how a normal character can get wrapped up in a group that we as an audience can look at and immediately know is bad. We see them as evil, but we never question why or how a character gets involved in that. If you are going to write a villain that can compel an audience, you need to start asking those questions. Why is this character where they are? Are they angry? Are they scared of someone else? Does this character think they’re doing the right thing? If so, why are they/do they use violence to accomplish their goals? Why is that necessary? When you look at Robbie Dean Tomlin’s story you can answer all those questions. You get him not as a villain, but as a character, and that’s where it starts.

          Another great example of villains as characters and not as bad guys is found in Avatar: The Last Airbender. Specifically the episode ‘The Boiling Rock’ where Sokka and Zuko break into the Fire Nation’s highest security prison and pretend to be guards. Their goal is to break Sokka’s dad and girlfriend Suki out of prison. The important note is that during the episode Sokka is able to chat with the Fire Nation guards. These people are his adversaries in this episode. They could imprison or kill him if he is discovered, but the guards aren’t set on that. They aren’t hell-bent on torturing the prisoners either. They’re just people. Not only that they’re nice people. The guards are nice to each other. They’re nice to Sokka, and they give not only their characters but the Fire Nation more dimension. Not every Death Eater under Voldemort is going to share his exact viewpoints or his bloodthirst. They are not all hell-bent on, ‘I must capture and kill Harry Potter,’ or, ‘I must spit in the face of muggles and mudbloods because they have to know their place.’ The same is true for HYDRA, or the Empire if you’re writing for Star Wars or the Fire Nation. You have to start writing your characters as people and give them the backstory and reasoning that would make them evil.

          Me personally, when I am writing a story the villain is the first character I write. I want to know them and know why they’re about to be mean to my OC. We’ll use two different villains I’ve written as examples: Anna and Sion. We will also use a common villain from fanfiction, Dolores Umbridge, for comparison.

          Treat your villains like protagonists. In a sense, they are the protagonists of their own stories, they just happen to be the antagonists of your OC’s. Know about their hobbies. Whether they have a family. If they don’t, what happened to that family? This information doesn’t need to be used necessarily, but it helps you as a writer know your antagonist as a person. For Anna, I know that she loves the outdoors. She likes rock-climbing and kayaking and she enjoys time outside. I know she has a son that she loves dearly, and she has a specific brand of French candy that she keeps well-stocked for herself. Sion, I know she has been married twice and has kids from both marriages. I know she likes fantasy novels because the idea of mythical beasts sounds cool to her. Dolores Umbridge, we know as readers loves the color pink. She likes frilly and lacy things. She loves cats. She’s the epitome of the old white ladies who shop at Dillards. It’s okay for you to give your villains something that isn’t stereotypically villainous. When we get into good examples of villains we’ll explain more why quirks and characterization is so important.

          Once you’ve created a character with a personality, start to flesh out where they work. What they do. This will give you a better idea of how they will interact with the OC. This too can be against the grain of stereotypical villains, which the Editor and I usually see as men in dark rooms brooding over something we the audience don’t know and beating the OC because it’s fun. Again, that isn’t a villain, that’s just an asshole. I also as a reader don’t know who that villain is as a person. I just know that I’m supposed to really really hate him or her because they’re mean to the OC. So, give them a personality, and tell me about their life. Are they the CEO of a massive corporation? Are they politicians? A teacher? A spy? Give me something I can take in and help me as the reader understand who this person is. We know Dolores is senior undersecretary to the Minister. She is a woman in a high place who loves her job. Anna, for example, we’ll say is a former spy. She was a spy when she was younger and has moved up in her organization to the point where she oversees other agents and acts as their support. Sion on the contrary is the head of the department of Chemistry wherever she works. She oversees students and has her own research lab. All characters have opportunities to interact with people, and therefore the OC. Your villain shouldn’t be a hermit. That’s less realistic, because then, how can we expect them to go antagonize the OC if they never leave the house?

          So, we now have a character with a personality, and we have a character with a career that fits their story. A good way that I’ve found to turn a character who would otherwise be good evil, is to pile on those flaws and have them act on their weaknesses more so than their strengths. We give our protagonists strengths and weaknesses but seldom do they lean on their weaknesses and put faith in insecurities. Let your villains down that kool-aid. It’ll make the drop into madness smoother. For Sion, we’ll have a character who is insecure. She is insecure about her usefulness, she’s worried her department will be absorbed into another, she’s insecure about her age and about some freak from nowhere with none of her training or experience being able to take away and undercut her value in the society she lives in. She has many children to provide for, and has a lot to lose should she lose her job (psst, this is where the OC comes in). Anna as a character grew a bit differently. Her insecurities came from her backstory, where she fell in love with another spy, had a long happy life with that spy until the same life that brought them together and made the world a game killed him. Her weaknesses come in that she feels abused by the system, and that she will not let others be abused by the same system. She feels more gallant than a character like Sion, and that she is saving characters who wouldn’t listen to her otherwise. Who doesn’t understand that the world is filled with bad people and no one else is willing to take out bad people? (psst, this is the easy driving force for the protagonists to oppose). Dolores’s insecurities come from ignorance. She follows the Minister on blind faith and doesn’t want to be proven wrong. If he fails she sees herself as failing too. In addition, she has internalized intolerance that has built up over time because of the oppression of half-breeds and muggle-borns. She helps write laws that oppress muggle-borns. She makes them submit for questioning. Dolores is happy where she is because her prejudice is a blanket of security for her. She loves her job, and she wants to stay where she is. So when Dumbledore or Harry try to uproot her, she is antagonistic.

          The impact of Sion, Dolores, and Anna, is that you end up with characters who do bad things but don’t see themselves as bad people. Anna believes she is doing the work that no one else is willing to do. That she is going after bad guys. Sion believes she is keeping her department alive. That she is looking out for the good of her people. Dolores is serving her ministry. None of these characters are truly evil, but when you present a young upstart who comes out of a factory that gets the spotlight and attention, or a group of ragtag kids who are trying to save as many people as they can regardless of experience because, “you can’t change where you come from,” or a wizard trying to shake down the years of intolerance at the central government, you get antagonism that is natural and makes sense. You get conflict that makes sense not only for the protagonists, but it makes sense for the antagonists to oppose them. That should be your goal when writing a villain. It should make sense for the villain to oppose the protagonist and vice versa, and it shouldn’t be because the villain is evil and that’s it.

          Now, to drive these points home further we’re going to break down great villains from the media and discuss why they are successful in the context that we’ve given you. We hope that by explaining these villains in the terms that we’ve just described, the importance of creating villains as characters first will make more sense.

          Let’s talk about Azula. She was the first to come up when the Editor and I discussed villains. We as an audience know Azula’s backstory. We know she was “born lucky,” and was beloved and revered by her father and grandfather. We know she had a bad relationship with her mother. We know she had friends. These are all aspects of personality that make Azula someone we can understand. Azula is serving her father and the Fire Nation. It just so happens that that nation is under more evil leadership. When we see the downfall of Azula, we see how the writers used her own insecurities to become her undoing. We see her instead as a deeply paranoid person, who is afraid of being betrayed by people she is supposed to trust. You see her crack under her own pressures. The brilliance of Azula is that we as an audience can relate to her in her downfall, and we see who she is beyond being a bad guy. She’s not like General Zhao, whose motivations and desires were more straightforward. She has complicated goals and wishes and desires that allow us to understand who she is as a person.

          Lucifer from Supernatural is another great example of a compelling villain. You see it in his development. He is meant to be the ultimate evil because he is after Sam and wants the end of the world. What the writers on Supernatural did is really explore the why of Lucifer’s actions. You see it in how his brothers talk to him. You see how Lucifer was, “the only one who could see what was going on.” That he couldn’t handle the new baby (mankind) coming home and lashed out. That he was kicked out of heaven by trying to prove that humans weren’t perfect. You see in the actor himself, that Lucifer is given a reason to be angry and a methodology behind his anger. This makes him more compelling as a villain. He isn’t evil just to be evil and he isn’t opposing humanity just to do it, he has a reason behind what he does. It makes us understand him as a character because his anger is relatable.

          Loki is often a villain or a love-interest in fanfiction. Sometimes when we’re feeling spicy, he’s a villain turned into a love interest because oh my god growth. Loki is given familial relationships and friendships that help us understand who he is as a character. On top of that, he’s given justifiable anger similar to that of Lucifer’s, which makes him act bad but believe he is in the right. Often when we read Loki fanfiction we see the tortured soul Loki who needs someone who can “understand” and “see him” in ways that his brother of 100-odd years somehow inexplicably cannot. This does not just apply to Loki (see Draco Malfoy, Lucifer, and sometimes Paul Lahote but he isn’t a villain). If you are going to give Loki a family that doesn’t know or understand him, you need to give Loki character traits that said the family wouldn’t know about. Hobbies he likes, activities he enjoys. Often Loki is reduced to reading, but in-depth analysis can allude to his reading being a means of escaping a bad situation. Does he write too? Tell me more. Loki is often reduced to either the tortured soul or the lunatic and he is neither. He is a boy first and foremost, who has been lied to his whole life, who was taken in as a political prop and was shoved aside and made to feel unwanted because he was not the blood son. That kind of stuff stays with a person. It messes you up and puts a lot of negative ideas in your head. From here is the source of Loki’s anger, but don’t say that his family doesn’t know him. They do, what they don’t do is accept or nurture him. The exception to this is Frigga. Loki’s motivations as a villain come from his backstory and the relationship he has with both his father and brother. Where fanfic writers often stumble is this dynamic, which is not one of unfamiliarity but one that lacks acceptance. Loki was ostracized for being different, but that isn’t to say Thor and the Warriors Three didn’t know he was different.

          Let’s talk about the Death Eaters. The Death Eaters are a great example of how systemic intolerance shapes a generation. They serve Voldemort out of both fear and loyalty because his power is something that is ingrained in their minds as something that is right. His ideas are perpetuated by Salazar Slytherin and enforced by pureblood families. The Death Eaters are examples of those who grew up in intolerance. They don’t necessarily follow Voldemort because they agree with him, but because their families do, their colleagues and friends do. They are so deep in this life they don’t know how to get out. Look at the obvious discomfort of the Malfoys in books 6 and 7. They clearly don’t want to be there. Death Eaters are way more complex than people give them credit for. If you’re writing Death Eater characters, lean into the Draco Malfoys and the Regulus Blacks of the world. Study how people in cults act and reflect on their time after leaving the cult. These resources will help you write characters that are more compelling than just, ‘Mudbloods suckkkk lmao.’

          Because he is so popular as a villain, we’re going to talk about Lucius Malfoy in addition to Death Eaters. Lucius Malfoy’s representation in fanfiction is horribly executed 9 times out of 10. This is because he follows the same fate of many characters that we discussed in Fanfiction 101. Lucius Malfoy is reduced to one-note beats and the most blatant parts of his personality. Because he is a villain, that beat is “I hate mudbloods and love Voldemort.” He’s like one of those MLM moms who are like, “love my God and my Essential Oils.” Lucius Malfoy should not be reduced to MLM moms with Live Laugh Love and internalized misogyny. He is way smarter than that. You don’t become one of Voldemort’s most devoted followers and come back from that without having your wits about you. Lucius is way smarter than what fanfiction writers commonly give him credit for. He’s intelligent. He’s driven. He was a Head Boy in his time at Hogwarts, and he knew how to try and sink his enemies without implicating himself. If you write Lucius Malfoy you need to dip into the cat-and-mouse games that are Lucius's personality. He’s not aggressively evil. He’s quiet. He slips in after the fighting is done and takes what he wants. The best example of this is during Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets. Everyone knew that it was Malfoy who slipped Tom Riddle’s diary in Ginny’s cauldron. However, there was no proof. Lucius Malfoy is a careful man, and in fanfiction that needs to be reflected.

          Villains are the most important character in your narrative. You need to view them as people. As characters first and as bad guys second. Your OC’s story can be centered around the villain, who should be complex, thought-out, and should have methods behind their madness. The audience needs to understand who your villain is by reading about them, just as much as your OC or side characters.

          Next week we’re discussing superpowers. We’ll break down how to make a cool set of superpowers, the common mistakes in superpowers, and give good and cringe examples.

Xoxo, Gossip Girl.