#i am imagining it soooo cute planted all around as well... like i could put in another broom plant to be high and flowers next to it

[b-blushes]

OH YEAH I just remembered that hours into not being able to sleep last night i finally potentially SOLVED MY POND WANT in a way that i can actually do!!!!!! >:) which would require spending NO money except on a water lily....... gonna ask my parents about it later if i can heeheehoohoo >:)

[hangryandlazy]

africa jul 19

wow lol it’s taken me 2 years to actually put this post together. a LOT has changed since then and it makes me immensely happy to recognize how lucky we were that we’d had 2 insane years of travelling right before the pandemic hit. but this post is not to dwell on that, so let’s get on with it!!

this was our amazing 2019 africa trip~

jun 30, 19 ••• we make our way from hong kong to the netherlands on klm airlines. i distinctly remember how impressed i was with the quality of service and the comfort of the 12ish hour flight. after around 16 hours of commute, we just want to stay in and chill, so we order room service and call it a night early. i recall wearing a fun t-shirt that read, “not to be rude, but shut the fuck up” which i personally find hilarious and endearing, but which made the guy at the front desk quite uncomfortable. lollll oops!

jul 1, 19 ••• yay! we had a full day alone in amsterdam. we (i) decided to walk from the hotel to the town center, because it’s fun experience new cities by exploring them on foot!! why not? you come across many things that you just couldn’t have planned to find.

look how beautiful the canals in amsterdam are! anywhere you turn, it’s picturesque.

we had lunch at wagamama because i saw that the avant garde vegan, gaz oakley, had done a collaboration with them at some point, so there are some guaranteed vegan options. we then walk around the bloemenmarkt and find our way to the cannabis college, which had 2 verdampers for rent! yesssss! i was so happy. 

we explored and walked around more, then stopped by a coffee shop to smoke a bit more. there was a lovely vegan cafe right next door, which i’d been eyeing when we went in to smoke, so we had a top up on coffee and matcha there. we saw a cute frenchie across the road and missed the dogs so...

we had dinner at this place called cafe frijdag (which means Friday!) which was delicious! so happy that amsterdam had vegan options for me

jul 2, 19 ••• we got up bright and early to meet my parents for breakfast and we go to the airport to catch our flight to kigali. about 10 hours later, we were buying sim cards at the kigali airport. we then checked in to the radisson for the night, and it was feeling very surreal to be in africa. i remember feeling anxious.

jul 3, 19 ••• today started on a somber note. we went to the kigali genocide memorial. i cried a lot, especially at the exhibit with the photographs of only a fraction of the victims during that time.

then we drove at turtle speed to our next hotel, which was a loooong long way away. we arrived at the lake kivu serena hotel in time for a very late lunch. the cuisine here consists of rice, tortilla-like wraps and papadum-esque crispy rolls.

this fruit tastes disgusting... it looks like a tomato but isn’t sweet at all. i only remember spitting it out, trying another piece from another plate, and still hating it.

thankfully everyone wanted to relax and take it easy, so we ordered in for dinner and spent the rest of the night chilling.

jul 4, 19 ••• we drove out to see the border between rwanda and the democratic republic of congo. we were told to be very careful about taking photos of the police officers there, so we were. it felt strange to take photos of the border, i’m clearly very ignorant of the relations and history. it was a very busy juncture, with a sea of people crossing this way and that, lots of cars bumbling about and a lot of fruit, as i recall. hahah.

we then drove out to see a makeshift hot spring. we were asked if we wanted to take a dip, but none of us wanted to..... felt bad saying no, but really not worth it, sorry.

https://vimeo.com/568059672  (okay, i’m unable to embed more videos so links will have to do until i figure out something better...)

we took a boat ride along the lake, but there wasn’t that much to see around there, it was pretty dirty and murky... reminded me of the hong kong harbor, with trash floating around. it was also freezing, so i wasn’t having any fun at all.

we went to the gym and worked out a little bit because there was a lot of time to kill in between returning to hotel and our private pre-planned bbq dinner on the beach. we were lucky enough to enjoy traditional rwandan dancing which was absolutely gorgeous.

jul 5, 19 ••• we spent most of our morning in the car, having crossed the border to the republic of uganda. we stopped by a cute cafe along the way for lunch, but it was a grueling 4-5 hour car ride to mahogany springs, which was our hotel for the gorilla trekking. we managed to arrive around 715pm, by which time it was pretty dark and scary outside. the other car had broken down twice, once in the dark as well, so spirits were low and there was a lot of muttering and grumbling done under people’s breath. everyone was ravenous by the time dinner was served, but despite how late it was, it was absolutely delicious and i was happy! (also grateful for our car not having broken down)

jul 6, 19 ••• we woke up VERY early in anticipation of gorilla trekking. we waited around the hotel lobby after some coffee and biscuits for breakfast. it was an awful lot of waiting, but i didn’t sense anything wrong until i saw how pissed off our tour guide looked. it turns out our permits had gotten stolen! probably bribes.

here we were mucking around, still anticipating gorilla trekking.

we didn’t let it slow us down though. i actually am grateful for how things turned out because we wouldn’t have gotten to experience uganda like that without this turn of events. we joined a community tour that showed us how tea is harvested, how coffee is grown, harvested and round, as well as how bananas may be used to make juice, beer and gin! very cool

african tea leaves

jackfruit??

these are flowers from the coffee tree

the different stages of the coffee plant

this is henry, he owns this coffee plantation. here, henry shows us how to the use this contraption, the purpose of which is to grind coffee beans into powder

here henry is, sifting the coffee powder

here are my parents, having the time of their life (lol at my dad)

fresh bananas

these are the different stages of a banana’s life: from raw to ripe to fermenting. it can be made into juice and liquor.

we then visited a local school, where we were entertained by kids from kindergarten to 6th grade. we learned about their mission and goals to educate the younger generations by providing classrooms and a dining hall and even dorms for boarding. the singing and dancing was BRILLIANT. loved every single second of it. wish i’d joined in and not cared about what anyone thought.

we stopped by a women’s community center and saw a lot of cool crafts and art. that was on the way to the batwa pgymy tribe. we learned how they integrated with the batwa community. they showed us some dances they have dedicated to the gorillas, for which they are very grateful because it brings tourists in and therefore gives them an income. they showed us how to use a bow and arrow to hunt, and how they weave baskets and make handicrafts.

alan with the leader of the pgymy tribe

one of our guides spotted 2 chameleons, which was super impressive. he even brought the chameleon down close to us so that we could see it. i won’t ever understand how he was able to spot it in the wild, and from so far away as well.

we returned to the lodge and had lunch. the veggie stir fry was pretty dang good. it was served with posho, which is a maize bread, beans, and also matate (???) which reminded me a lot of plantain. back at the hotel, we chilled (without tv or wifi) until dinner. alan fell asleep, and i kept myself busy sorting out photos. dinner was early, and our night was early because we were promised gorilla trekking in the morning!

delicious!

jul 7, 19 ••• we were up and ready to leave by 7am. we were in the clear! we drove a little bit to the bwindi impenetrable national park for some entertainment (dancing and singing) from local students and a hilarious briefing on what to expect and do’s and don’ts of the trek. 

we then had separate meetings within our trekking groups. ours was quite big, with 10 tourists, because michael and our guides had spent HOURS the day before handling our stolen permits. an exception was made to accommodate us all, so our group consisted of the starke’s, alan, kerstin, a couple from oregon, and an english family. we had to get in another car and drive a bit to the mountain, where we met our porters and then began our trek!

the hike up was difficult, and at times i legit feared for my life because the mud/rocks were loose and one wrong step would have had us tumbling down the edge of the mountain... and that was me at age 28!! cannot imagine how my parents were feeling...

alan with meddie

as we made our way to the gorilla family, we encountered a solo young male who was soooo friendly, he cut across our group, like right down the middle, and he even reached out and touched my mom on her jacket! it was wild that a gorilla was that close to us, and then he left as quickly as he had joined.

this is the photo my mom managed to take when the young gorilla male was right next to her

we kept on hiking and found a large. our guide, meddie, told us that we were lucky to have found such a large family doing a whole bunch of different activities: we saw mothers nursing their babies, babies swinging from the trees and playing with one another, sub adult males beating their chests and other members of the family eating and feeding. we even got to watch as a silverback gorilla pulled a very healthy poop out of its butt, and we ran into him snacking again later on.

on the way down, it started raining a little bit. we all slipped at one point or another, but it was especially dangerous for my dad so we all had to slow down our pace a little bit to match his speed. thank god he had a porter there to help him out and save him. 

we returned to the same place as where we had started our morning for a debriefing, and we each received a certificate to show that we had been on this trek. we waited around a little bit for the other group to arrive, and were once again very grateful that our experience was much more pleasant. one lady in the other group had to leave the trek on a stretcher, and the others were caught in the rain on their way to the gorillas, so it must have been a cold and awful experience on their end. 

us after the successful completion of our gorilla trek!!

we headed to a local inn nearby where we had a late lunch and could change into dry clothes. we then drove a bumpy 4 hours to mweya safari lodge, located inside queen elizabeth national park. we made a couple of stops along the way (one of which was in the middle of nowhere so that people could go pee out in the open where animals are potentially roaming around?!?!?) and when we finally arrived, it was already 830/9ish pm.... we insisted to order room service because we were pooped, and we got showered and hit the hay.

this cute sign was outside the lodge!

this super old school cash register was at the lodge too

jul 8, 19 ••• today started off with a game drive, early in the morning! 

we drove around the gorgeous park and saw elephants, warthogs, antelope, eagles, all sorts of bird and butterflies, buffalo and weird-looking lemur or ferret creatures. we thought it was great, but some other members of the group were underwhelmed. 

this is the view from the car we sat in for the safari

this gorgeous tree houses sooo many bird’s nests! do you see them?

cute antelope we saw on the tour

after lunch at the hotel, we went on a boat tour around the kazinga channel. i think it was called lake edward? we saw many animals again, including crocodile, elephants, buffalo, all sorts of birds, and hippos.

favorite photo of my parents ¨̮

we followed a few elephant cuties along the bank. it drizzled for a little bit in between.

dinner was delicious. it was a great buffet, although i was severely grossed out by the ants that joined us on the dining table.

there were so many animals on the grounds of the lodge. don’t be fooled by how cute these guys look, we saw them fight over raw meat at some point! we also saw a warthog stroll around.

jul 9, 19 ••• we were up bright and early today for a quick breakfast before heading right on out. on the way to entebbe, we stopped by a local motel for lunch. the service was SUPER slow (maybe because we had such a huge group together!) but it was delicious and worth the wait! i ordered a coleslaw and avocado vinaigrette (this was THE HUGEST AVOCADO i’ve ever seen in my life?!?!?), a veggie biryani and some of paul’s aloo matar. we then filed back into our cars for several more hours of “african massage” to the next destination. had an early night, i think we ordered room service to the hotel room and tried to get our butts to bed as early as possible because it was another EARLY day the morning after.

we stopped at the equator in uganda to take some photos, of course!

i was sooo happy to be able to order room service! we felt like we were finally back to civilization... 🥺 we had wifi and tv and hot water... ugh it was amazing

jul 10, 19 ••• my alarm was set for 4am this morning.... 🥲😅 we left the hotel at 5am for the airport and obviously i was tired and grumpy and just in a crappy mood overall hahahah. our first flight was barely 45 minutes.... to mbarara i’m guessing?? i was assigned a middle seat on my own originally but no one was in the aisle seat so i moved over woohoo! our first layover was 2-3 hours, not too bad. we hung around at the lounge area. 

our second flight was to harare. alan and i managed to snag 2 joined seats towards the back end of the plane so that we could watch conan’s traevel shows on his ipad. there was a pretty scary drop when we were descending imto harare. i think we just stayed on the plane for about half an hour so some people could get on the plane and join.

we flew about 3 hours more to cape town, and we were EXCITED to arrive. it was a hell of a time checking in, and it was a nicer hotel in a nice area so we decided to just stay in and order room service again. we had a slow night and it was SOOOO needed. cape town felt a lot closer to the first world and we were enjoying and appreciating it to the max. we even started playing pokemon go and its harry potter-themed equivalent (oops forgot the name), but to be fair, we didn’t get cell phone service everywhere we went, so it would cut on and off.

jul 11, 19 ••• eek, cape town was COOOOLD! luckily i brought a jacket along, we really really needed to cover up and stay warm! got to sleep in a bit, we left by 830am to drive to the pebble beach by the water to take some gorgeous photos. we stopped by chapman’s peak for another photo op, then drove to boulders beach in simon’s town to see the penguins!! it was such a dream, loved every second of it.

i believe this was chapman’s peak??

what a model

this was at the pebble beach at the cape of good hope. 

saw a cute ostrich on the way somewhere

next we went to cape point. we took the funicular to the top, then hiked up to the lighthouse. we took pots of great pics but omg it was EVEN MORE freezing there. we had lunch at the two oceans restaurant. fancy and delicious! the calamari was bomb, the arancini was alright, but the main of chickpea and mushrooms was delish. after lunch we headed right on back to the hotel.

when i said it was cold, i wasn’t joking... it was FREEZING at the top. i had a horrible time because i don’t do that well in the cold

alan and i walked over to woolworths to get water and makeup remover and snacks. on the way back we stopped by PLANT for dinner. i was sooo excited to try out their vegan fast food, so i ordered a lot of the menu. we got the quinoa salad, mac and cheez, seitan lasagna, schawarma, pot stickers, siu mai, spag bolognese, tiramisu, milk tart and a bunch of other random vegan snacks. i was in HEAVEN. even though some of the stuff was cold by the time we got back to the hotel and ate, it still tasted DELICIOUS. i was soooo impressed.

this was the lasagna. omfg i need an encore of this restaurant one day!!! wish i knew how to cook like this

jul 12, 19 ••• today we went to a wine blending workshop at grande provence winery. the first step was to blend 3 different mixtures. after tasting them all, we decided the last blend was the winner, with 40% zinfandel, 10% shiraz and 50% cabernet. so then we blended up a big bottle of it, corked it, thew on a hand-signed label, and then walked around the beautiful indoor and outdoor art galleries.

this was our group!

wine blending is literally mixing different wines together in different proportions and figuring out which you like the taste of the best

there was a lot of cute art at the winery! i loved all the dogs and greyhounds around the property. these 3 dancing pigs came a close second

we drove a little way for lunch at another beautiful vineyard. i had a charcoal ciabatta, tomato quinoa salad, root veggie risotto and steamed veggies on the side. we skipped the wine tasting because our lunch overran a bit and our bus driver buford said that the traffic would be pretty heavy on a friday afternoon and it wouldn’t be worth it to be stuck on the bus. so we just walked around the cute little town we were at, franschhoek (??)

there was a lot of cute art and small local shops around this town! we strolled around and got some souvenirs ¨̮

love this

we had a dinner booked way ahead at fyn restaurant. it was stunningly delicious. i loved every single course and was thoroughly impressed.

UGHHHHH just soooo good.

jul 13, 19 ••• FINALLY we had a day to sleep in!!!! we let our group know the night before that we didn’t want to join the walking tour around the city. we woke up and made our way to the company’s garden, which was directly next to our hotel. we played harry potter wizards unite and ran into the tour group. my mom told me later on it was a good decision of ours not to join haha.

we walked to addis in cape for an authentic ethiopian meal experience. we washed our hands at the table, ate the whole meal with our hands, and finally i was able to taste injera. it was 100% teff injera and it did not disappoint. i ordered a vegan platter while alan got a combo. the amount of food was PERFECT for us, we finished every single thing. 

we ordered dessert but the hot berries never showed up and the ice cream was interestingly very gummy and very very sweet. the coffee was strong and served with a beautiful platter.

after that, we needed to walk our full tummies off. we headed to the waterfront, where there were many shops and stalls in indoor and outdoor malls. it was just a really good time walking around there and we saw soooo many things. there was bubble tea in south africa, a yogurt bar that made me sooo happy, dogs were up for adoption, and a bootleg jabbawockeez performance at the city square. we walked back to the hotel after that and got ready for bed.

jul 14, 19 ••• we woke up at 430am to head to the airport by 530am. we caught our first flight from cape town to johannesburg, then transferred to a direct flight back to hong kong. it was a TIRING trip but wow, the memories!! really want to go to back soon

[chronicfangirling]

Hard-earned affection

HongbinxOC | Fluffiest fluff | Dad!Hongbin AU

Words: 1530 Summary: Hongbin is convinced that this is his karma for a lifetime of cringing at affection, indiscriminate savagery, and tsundere attitude. A/N: I have the hardest time imagining 4VIXX as dads, except for this very specific situation of Hongbin being snubbed by babies that inherited his prickliness and he can only laugh-cry about it.

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:*

"Soohan! Soobin!" Hongbin alternated between clapping and holding out his arms. "Come to Appa!"

The twins gazed up from their toy bricks. When their wide eyes met their father's identical eyes, they looked away with disinterest.

"Boys, are you really going to keep ignoring your own father?" he laughed, though there was a hint of despair in his voice.

Not even giving any sign that they heard him, they kept babbling in their own baby language.

Hongbin opened a Disney game on his iPad. "Here boys, let's play a game! You like games of course, you take after Appa--”

"Hongbin!" Hana scolded as she entered the living room. She set down the tray of fruit on the coffee table and planted her hands on her hips. "They're not even a year old, they can't play with gadgets!"

Her worry was unnecessary, however, the twins didn't even spare a glance for their dad. At the sound of her voice, both boys dropped their bricks and tottered on their feet. They were only ten months old and could barely take three steps without falling, but they toddled towards her on their wobbly, chubby legs, leaving the pile of toys by their favorite sunny spot by the terrace doors. "M-Ma! Ma, ma, ma..."

"They didn't care about the game at all, they only care about Eomma," Hongbin marveled.

"Of course they didn't," Hana giggled over the twins' heads as she received their cuddles. "You're the only one in this house who would choose a videogame over me."

"I like you much more than any and all games though," he mumbled.

"Hmm, what?"

"Nothing!" He slapped his flushed cheeks and sat next to them by the table. Both boys were clamoring for fruit, and Hana couldn't feed them both fast enough. He pierced a grape with a fruit fork and waved it. "Soohan, Soobin! You guys like grapes too, right?"

"Ma!" Soohan complained as Hana fed Soobin a grape.

"Soohan, buddy, it's okay, Appa has one for you too." Hongbin tried to feed the older twin, but the toddler's usual smile scrunched into a frown and he turned his face away. When Hongbin pushed the grape closer, Soohan backed away, stumbling and falling hard on his butt and immediately bursting into tears. "Maaaaaaa!"

Hearing the older twin wail, the more timid Soobin started crying as well. "Maaaaaaa!"

"Oh no, no, no, no, no." Panicking, Hongbin gathered the twins in his arms but they only sobbed harder and trashed in an attempt to escape his embrace. He gaped at his wife. "They're crying because of me. Again."

Hana giggled once more, watching him struggle to keep the boys from slithering to the floor. Soohan slipped away, falling tummy-first on the carpet. It was definitely the right choice to get full carpeting for the house considering they had twin boys.

"Don't laugh!" Hongbin whined, keeping a slippery grip on Soobin while he clutched at Soohan's shirt to keep the latter from rolling away. "Our children hate me!"

"Oh honey, you're such a drama queen sometimes," she teased. "They don't hate you, you're their Appa."

"I don't think they know what that means," he lamented. He saw Soohan immediately calm down when Hana patted his back. The toddler started crawling into her lap, hissing at his father's hand still gripping his shirt. Hongbin released him and reluctantly handed Soobin over to Hana as well. "I guess they think I'm some weird man living in the same house."

Soobin squeezed in beside his twin--their mother was a tiny woman so there wasn't much space on her lap, and they were both big for their age. They both nuzzled against her chest, babbling as they gazed at her adoringly. Dimples appeared on their puffy cheeks as they laughed.

"So cute!" Hana kissed each of them in turn. "How are your dimples so cute?"

They got those from me after all, Hongbin thought. "Where's mine?"

"Your what?"

"You were also oblivious like this when we were dating." I should have a kiss too. Before she could get annoyed, he remarked: "They really take after me. They not only look like me, they even act like me." He sneaked a pat on Soobin's head. 

"Cringing away from affection?" Hana teased. 

"No! I mean... yeah, they do that too," he confessed. "But I mean they love you too much."

"Ehh?" she protested playfully. "How is that like you? When did you ever give me as much love as Soohan and Soobin do?"

He sulked. "That's how we have babies, because I gave you so much love."

"Hongbin!" She covered the twins' ears, blushing.

As pretty as a flower. He smirked. "What? It's true."

"I guess it is," she conceded. "Honey, come closer."

He raised an eyebrow but scooted closer anyway. "Really? In front of the children?"

"Don't be silly." She slapped his arm then took his hand, putting it around Soobin's tiny fist. "Appa needs to get closer to the babies."

Soobin narrowed his eyes at Hongbin, who couldn't help but chuckle. "What's this... he even has the same judgmental look as me." He sighed, unable to hide his dejection. "I don't get it, I even took time off when they were born. And I come home every day. But they only love you."

"Of course they love you too." Hana assured him. "You're just all a little too much alike so your sons got your tsundere personality as well."

"Is that it, buddy?" Hongbin rubbed Soohan's chin. The baby pushed his hand away, but Hana whispered soothingly.

"Soohan, let Appa play with you too. You know Appa loves you two so much." As if understanding his mother's words, he didn't protest when his father rubbed his chin again.

"Soohan... " Hongbin couldn't help but melt. "Appa's so happy right now."

"You should hug him," Hana said.

"Oh, I don't think he'd like that," Hongbin fretted.

"It will be fine." She transferred Soohan in his arms.

Hongbin limbs stiffened, preparing for an outburst. But the baby nuzzled against his shoulder, short arms clinging to his body. He laughed with pure joy, cuddling his oldest son. "Appa loves you, Soohan, you know that, right?"

After a few more moments, Soohan pushed off him and settled with Hana, replacing Soobin who had been getting fed with fruit. Hana led Soobin into Hongbin's embrace.

"Appa loves you too, Soobin." For a moment, it felt like he would attempt to wriggle away, but he looked over his shoulder and his mother smiled encouragingly at him. Soobin rested his head on his father's shoulder and started patting the latter's back with his pudgy hand. "Cute!"

All too soon, Soobin ducked away from the hug and called for Soohan. Holding hands, the two of them ran to their pile of toys, chattering animatedly. 

"It kind of feels like they're gossiping about the weird man who happens to be their Appa." Hongbin shook his head. "It's going to take so much effort to win their affections, huh?"

"They are your sons after all--oh!" Hana squeaked when he pulled her into his lap. Before she could say anything more, he pulled her into a tight hug, her cheek pressed against his chest and her head tucked under his chin. 

"Noona, I'm sorry. I made you work really hard for my affection too. It must've felt like this. Except worse." he sighed. "You had to make a boyfriend out of your prickly friend, and I was definitely not as adorable as these two little guys."

"It was difficult," she confessed. "But you're worth it."

"How am I this lucky?" he mumbled, mostly to himself. He lifted her chin and looked into her eyes. "You know I like you much more than any videogame, right? I'd choose you every time."

"I know." She nodded.

At that moment, her lips were so pink and glossy they looked like they were begging to be kissed. So he did.

He didn't know how long they were kissing before two angry screams rang in unison and small blows scattered upon him.

Hana slid off his lap, staring at Soohan and Soobin as they pounded their tiny fists against Hongbin's arms. "What's wrong, my babies?"

"Oh my God," Hongbin laughed. "I think they're jealous. Our Soohan and Soobin only want Eomma for themselves? But what to do, Appa loves her too?" He pecked her on the lips.

Soohan yelled in protest and launched himself towards Hongbin, who let himself fall backwards, hugging the little boy in his arms. Soobin took the opportunity to kiss Hana, then he pinned down Hongbin just as Soohan escaped and jumped at Hana for his own kiss. 

"Did you see that? They're teaming up against me! They're so smart!" Hongbin gushed. "We made such smart babies, isn't that amazing? They're amazing!"

"You're totally wrapped around their little fingers." Hana cooed, still accepting kisses from the boys.

"Of course I am, they're perfect," Hongbin declared, sitting up to hug all three of them at once. "You're perfect too. This is perfect."

"Soooo cheesy! What happened to my prickly Hongbin?" she teased.

"I think the children stole my prickliness," he chortled, stealing kisses from Soohan and Soobin while they couldn't turn away from him. 

[almaasi]

reaction post typed while watching Good Omens (ALL OF IT)

my favourite novel is now my favourite mini-series and IT’S SO BEAUTIFUL

under the cut: a very long, spoilery six-episode reaction to MY NEW FAVOURITE THING EVER

--

may 31st 07:36pm nz

i posted my episode 1 reaction a couple hours ago but that got ZERO NOTES so i assume people are either avoiding spoilers or aren’t interested, which is fine, but i’m just gonna put all my reactions in one big post so anyone who IS interested doesn’t have to read 6 separate posts c:

edit june 1st 04:08am: btw i watched using a free trial on amazon prime, which i’m pretty sure is worldwide. soooo if yOU WANT TO WATCH THIS, YOU CAN, FOR FREE

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EPISODE 1: In the Beginning

--

04:03pm

idk how much i’m gonna type, whether i’ll post a reaction to the entire thing in one post....... or how much i’ll end up watching right now

kinda want to spread it out and save it as a treat for after i’ve done some writing

but right now i wanna watch before writing

so maybe i’ll do one ep, write something, then return to this?

edit: aahhaha that didn’t happen

-

04:04pm

I’M SO EXCITED

I’VE BEEN WAITING SO LONG

well... since 2011 when i first read the book

but regardless it’S BEEN 84 YEARS

-

04:05

okay first off i did not know amazon prime did adverts at the start of their videos. so i was like SINCE WHEN WAS CHILDISH GAMBINO/DONALD GLOVER IN GOOD OMENS

and then

yeah

no

either way i thought it was a good opening

-

W A R

NING

cool cool cool cool cool

-

omg i’m used to where the netflix full-screen button is, and on amazon prime that’s the “next episode” button so i gotta be real careful

-

dear god my video quality is TERRIBLE

i.......... i might torrent this show and watch it offline

this is horrendous i can’t see a damn thing

i have never seen pixels this big

-

04:11

okay the quality calmed down after a minute

i loooove the intro, i love that it’s basically word for word from the book

i feel like i’d find it funnier if i hadn’t read the book 3 months ago

-

also? god is a woman? yes

-

04:13

is it just me or does the snek have a slightly david tennant-esque quality about it

-

i’m so happy adam and eve are black

-

04:17

omfg. aziraphale said “ineffable” and now CRAWLEY’S CHECKING HIM OUT TRYING TO SEE IF HE HAS ANY JUNK

WOW

...or y’know, looking for a flaming sword. SAME FUCKING THING.

-

also i looove how FLUFFY azi is

-

azi: “do hope i didn’t do the wrong thing”

i fucking love them both uhrgughhhuhuhughuhhh

-

04:21

small sob for cuteness

umbella wings

-

04:23

in the opening titles, crowley just stopped a spaceship and aziraphale turned it into fish

i feel like that was a douglas adams reference and i’m on board

-

04:25

the entire time i read the book, up until i saw video promos of this show, i thought “crowley” was said the same way as spn’s “crowley”, as in “crahwlee”

not “crOhwlee”

i definitely like that they’re different though

both probably named after aleister crowley tbh. all of whom are queer.

-

THOSE SWAYING HIPS

i haven’t found david tennant attractive in about 9 years but WHOOOP HELLO AGAIN

somehow attractive for entirely different reasons than before. like. my taste changed but tHEN

-

i’m on crowley’s side, taking down a cellphone network is VERY ANNOYING

-

04:35

crowley: shitshitshitshithsit

:D

i can’t wait for aziraphale’s big swear

-

04:37

i miss eating sushi

sushi was great

-

04:43

this baby delivery thing is sTRESSFUL

“aaaaurthurrrrr”

nooo

poor lady

-

04:45

“little toesie woesies”

where’s the sister mary loquacious fan club and where do i sign up

-

i’m glad they colour-coded the babies and did the playing card explanation because this part of the book always tied my brain in knots

-

05:00

this is reminding me how utterly gross england is

-

“MY POINT IS............. DOLPHINS”

YES

-

05:06

see in the book

i never once realised that the nanny was crowley in disguise

-

05:11

digging the snake tattoo sideburns

-

05:14

and yeah the short hair looks good

-

05:15

fINALLY crowley called azi “angel”

-

05:17

crowley: “oh no no don’t do your magic act, pleeease”

the magic act scene is one of my fave parts of the book <3

-

05:20

aw man they cut out the best part

i mean i get why

the kids shouted a bunch of gay slurs at aziraphale

and there were no secret service people with guns

but aw mannn

AND THEY CUT OUT THE BIT WITH THE DEAD DOVE AND CROWLEY BRINGS IT BACK TO LIFE FOR AZIRAPHALE

THAT WAS MY SINGLE FAVOURITE BIT OF THE BOOK

AND IT’S GONE

;C

-

OH WAIT

THERE’S THE DOVE

OH GOOD

-

aw man aziraphhale just brought it back himself

i liked it better in the book

they sat on the steps outside and crowley comforted azi and took the dove and fixed it for him, and then it flew off

idk i just had such a perfect image of that moment in my mind and this was..... good but not the same at all

could be gayer

-

05:27

good dog

-

05:28

crowley: *snifsnif* something’s changed

aziraphale: “oh it’s a new cologne, my barber suggeste--”

crowley: “no no i know what you smell like”

gayyyyyyyyyy <3

-

05:31

okay that’s ep 1 watched!!! i’ll watch more maybe later tonight :D

ENJOYING THIS SO FAR

not as gay as expected ........YET

needs 400% more “angel” and “dear”

--

EPISODE 2: The Book

07:42pm

pillar of salt guy: “something smells evil”

the fact crowley smells evil and yet aziraphale likes his company regardless says a lot

-

07:49

fully expected crowley to say “i didn’t fall, i sauntered vaguely downwards”

-

07:50

iiiii’m finding the narrator a little annoying

maybe it’s because i read the book so i know what’s going on

but saying “he has four items to deliver in his van. he works for this postage company and he’s making his first delivery in a formal warzone”.... idk i feel like all of those things could be shown visually? saying it rather than showing it probably saved seven seconds of airtime, but damn

-

07:56

i wonder if the narrator was a later addition to this, for new audience clarity? the script for god just seems a little stilted, idk

edit: i kind of got used to it, but it was still jarring, which i’m sure was the opposite of the intended effect

-

08:09

the saddest newt

-

08:13

she’s kind of exactly how i imagined her in the book

and definitely my fave next to aziraphale and crowley

-

08:17

i feel so bad for crowley’s plants

poor babies

-

08:19

for some reason i imagined her as a redhead. kind of more like mrs weasley

-

08:33

these wee children......... so soft.......... so smol

-

08:25

v happy with the casting for pepper

tiny downside is that we lose another redhead

-

08:29

i find the kids’ conversations hilarious because they’re the same age as harry potter when he goes to hogwarts the first time

idk if this is what eleven year olds are like in real life, but when i read the book i did feel distinctly like they spoke like eight year olds

-

08:35

crowley: “i like spooky. big spooky fan, me”

he just sounds like the tenth doctor

-

08:36

YEEE FINALLY CROWLeY DOING NICE THINGS FOR AZIRAPHALE

-

08:48

"you know, crowley, i’ve always said that deep down you really are a--”

“SHUT IT”

DON’T YOU CALL HIM NICE YOU PRETTY BASTARD

-

loquacious: “sorry to break up an intimate moment”

-

08:45

i imagined anathema’s tripod thing to be about 5 feet tall, not a cute little knee-high thing

-

08:48

freddie mercury: BIIIII CYCLE

BIIIIIIII CYCLE

yeah i was waiting for that

-

crowley: “get in, angel”

HE MURMURED

DON’T MURMUR YOUR TERMS OF ENDEARMENT noo

-

09:00

end of episode 2!!! i freaking loved aziraphale vs the book <3

-

the credits for this ep credit konnie huq as someone named pam but idk who that is? i had a crush on konnie huq as a kid when she was a presenter on “blue peter”

OH WAIT RIGHT the lady on the breakfast show on crowley’s tv. aw such a small part. hoping we’ll see her again later

edit: nope. might rewatch that part to pay more attention. obviously i didn’t even recognise her after like.. 15 years

--

EPISODE 3: Hard Times

09:05pm

brb gotta get some food

-

09:14

and now i wait for food

EPISODE THREE LET’S GO

is this the one that’s just crowley and azi’s backstory?

-

09:16

i can’t even put my finger on why but he’s getting more attractive

-

09:21

ah yes

aziraphale is eating shellfish and trying to tempt crowley

“oh... that’s your job”

i love this part of their dynamic

-

09:29

i adore when crowley makes aziraphale smile <3

-

09:43

SAUNTERED VAGUELY DOWNWARDS

YEE

-

i like seeing how crowley’s sunglasses differ throughout history

-

09:36

“if they knew i’d been... fraternising”

this is such a forbidden romance i love ittttt

-

09:49

CROWLEY SAVED THE BOOKS

and SOFT VIOLIN PLAYS

THIS IS A FUCKING LOVE STORY

k this is my favourite part of the show so far <3

-

09:50

this angel just fell in love

right in that moment

i see cartoon hearts around him

-

09:54

just had to pause for a second bc there was some broccoli in my tea :c

-

09:56

awwwwwwwwwwwwww 

he got him holy waterrrrrrr

-

UNIVERSAL ANGLE OF HETEROSEXUAL LONGING

-

definitely feeling a lot of “NOW KISS” right about now

-

09:59

LAUGHING BECAUSE THE OPENING CREDITS ARE LITERALLY HALFWAY INTO THE EPISODE

-

10:03

throughout the entire book azi just came across as the kind of person who wore glasses even though glasses were never once mentioned

I AM GLAD TO SEE GLASSES

-

10:12

i like this colour palette and the gold in their makeup

-

10:27

“we can go off together”

omg the world’s ending and crowley’s all RUN AWAY WITH MEEE

-

10:31

okay then

good eyelashes

edit: i also like how their relationship was explained with a simple tap on the wrist: hurry up, you’re on the clock, i’m a sex worker, finish your call because i’m leaving

-

10:32

episode three DONE

these eps don’t feel long enough

maybe that means the pacing is just right? who knows

i feel like i should be doing something other than watching this but..... why

--

EPISODE 4: Saturday Morning Funtime

10:48pm

aziraphale is SOFT and he’s perfect like that <3

fuck u gabriel and your body shaming

-

10:53

i want delivery guy to be okay BUT I READ THE BOOK

so............... i know he will be...... eventually

-

10:55

how did they get photographs taken in the 1600s

-

oh gabriel’s eyes ARE purple, i thought i was seeing them wrong

-

11:02

“maud i love you”

noo ho hoooo

-

11:09

a little douglas adams, definitely

BUT NO PEPPER POT DALEK

AWW

-

11:10

the season is very much jumping between summer and autumn

though i suppose that’s the point, tadfield is just perfect

-

11:12

“which the internet has begun to refer to as the kracken”

i wonder if good omens inadvertently inspired me to write The Wireless a couple of years back. wouldn’t be surprising

edit: no, couldn’t have, because the internet wasn’t much of a thing (or a thing at all?) in the book, given its publish date

-

11:20

that’s a v nice dress/top combo

gosh she’s so pretty

-

11:30

crowley: “we can run away together!!! alpha centauri!!!”

aw baby

-

crowley: “i’m going home, angel! i’m getting my stuff, and i am leaving. and when i am up in the stars, i won’t even think about you!!”

THAT WAS A V SAD BREAKUP NOOOOO

why has there not been a single “dear” yet :c

-

11:37

oh no, this part

i loved this in the book but i am NOT READY for maggots

damn you gaiman

-

11:39

he’s so cute

and so gay

-

11:42

uriel: “don’t think your boyfriend in the dark glasses will get you special treatment in hell”

he looks kinda delighted uriel called crowley his boyfriend

i would say he looks worried but this shot was used without context in the trailer and it came across as genuine joy, i actually thought he was looking at crowley

-

11:46

i thought it was a strange throne before

a spider at the centre of a web

dark halo

yeah

-

11:51

oh now she’s a redhead???

-

also i’m glad they implied newt and anathema just kissed because the sex thing was weird in the book

-

okay never mind

hmm

-

12:05

aziraphale: “oh.................ffffUCK.”

YEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAH

-

12:07

oh no

it’s happening

oh no

i hate this part but i love what happens because of it

-

12:29am

i have eaten and now i have tea and i am back from MORE BOOKSHOP FIRE

-

EPISODE 5: The Doomsday Option

12:31

nuuuuuuuuuu

and “you’re my best friend” playing while crowley’s tryna call azi

nuuuuuu

-

“somebody killed my best friend”

jfhsdfjsdj

/sobs

-

12:36

freddie mercury: “somebody find me somebody tooo ooo looove”

edit: the narration WRECKED this. it was so dramatic and visually emotional but the voiceover completely screwed with it and it was SO UNNECESSARY.

-

12:46

crowley: “i lost my best friend”

he says, while crying, while talking to that friend

-

THE ONE BOOK HE WANTS IS THE ONE CROWLEY SAVED

THEY’RE SO FUCKING BEAUTIFUL TOGETHER

-

azi wanted to share crowley’s body

and then said they had to get a wiggle on

-

12:52

they cut out the hell’s angels / lesser horsemen

i figured they would, but still a shame

-

1:54

in the book tracy’s “spirit guide” was native american but daaaaaamn that part really needed to go

now she’s irish which is... better, probably

-

01:01

ron: “SHUT. UUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUP”

this guy’s having the time of his life

-

01:03

he wave

-

01:05

1926 bentley; sexiest car right next to the ‘67 chevy impala

-

01:08

omg gotta translate and explain the road

-

01:13

OH NO the maggots are about to happen

they changed the placement of this but it worked for the pacing

-

OH NO

-

k well the maggots were gross but not as bad as i imagined

-

01:31

omg the dog turned upside down rather than be picked up

i wonder if that was intentional

dog: I DO NOT WANT UP

-

01:34

pfff he’s reading “american gods” by neil gaiman

-

01:44am

10/10 flaming car

-

EPISODE 6: The Very Last Day of the Rest of Their Lives

01:51am

here we go...

-

01:55

azi so happy that crowley said the dress suits him <3

-

01:57

rip bentley

-

01:59

aziraphale: “we are here to lick some serious butt!!”

crowley: “kick!! kick, aziraphale, for heaven’s sake”

-

02:06

i freaking love the parallel between the Them and the horsemen in the book

and i love that they did face shots to show the parallel

pepper = war

wensleydale = famine

brian = pollution

adam = death

the parallel is less clear for brian and wensleydale, at least in the show. was more obvious in the book. but at the same time i kind of got confused between them a lot, brian was always eating, but wensleydale was named after cheese

-

02:14

pepper: “i do not endorse everyday sexism”

/STOMPS ON WAR’S FOOT

YEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH

-

02:25

shadwell: “anyone who wants ta get ta the hoore of babylon will have to get past me”

earlier anathema said “boyfriend”

may i point out that all the adults are paired up

shadwell & madame tracy

newt & anathema

......and....

aziraphale and crowley

-

0:28

crowley: “we are FUCKED”

these two need a holiday

-

azi: “come up with something... or.... or i’ll never talk to you again”

he knows crowley loves him aww

perfect blackmail material

-

02:32

they went from trying to kill him to being his gay angel parents real quick

-

02:35

thought they were holding hands for a second there

edit: regardless, a whole damn airfield and they’re 2cm apart

-

02:39

happy ending for the postman, hooray~

-

crowley about the bookshop, softly: “it burned down. remember? you can stay at my place”

awwWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW

-

02:42

CROWLEY GOT HIS CAR BACK AND YET HE TOOK A TAXI

-

02:45

anathema: “why is your car called dick turpin?”

newt: “dick turpin is a famous highwayman. it’s called dick turpin because everywhere it goes, it holds up traffic”

i laughed

this wasn’t in the book and i always wondered

-

02:51

i wonder if holy water wouldn’t burn him because he’s too good

-

03:00

gabriel: “don’t talk to me about the greater good, sunshine, i’m the angel fucking gabriel”

really enjoying these swears

-

03:03

i thought so

-

03:30am

paused for a bit to get ready for bed

i thought it was after 4am but nope

-

“there would be other summers, but not one like this. not ever again”

that genuinely makes me emotional

i think that’s why it’s my favourite book, i can relive that summer with them

-

03:35

omg

-

OH MY GOD

WAIT

THEY

OH MY GOD

THEY WEREN’T IMMUNE, THEY JUST SWAPPED PLACES

HOLY SHIT

edit: THIS WAS NOT IN THE BOOK AND IT’S BRILLIANT AND I’M GLAD IT’S HERE

-

crowley: “let me tempt you to a spot of lunch?

azi: “~temptation accomplished~!”

THEY’RE SO STINKING CUTE

-

“just enough of a bastard to be worth knowing”

perfect

STILL NO USE OF “DEAR” THOUGH AND IT’S KILLING ME

-

that ending with the bird made me teary-eyed

-

credits: BENEDICT CUMBERBATCH AS SATAN

WOW

OKAY

AKSFJDSF /snorts

-

the end credits and the song i just wanna bawl my eyes out

i loved this so much and i’m so glad it was GOOD

i loved that they added so many people of colour. in the book i imagined crowley played by alexander siddig (star trek: deep space 9 era) but i guess david tennant makes a pretty good crowley too

i’m trying not to be upset that my favourite scene with the dove and aziraphale’s affectionate use of “dear” was taken out

but 

this was damn good regardless. even gayer in places than in the book

-

this nightingale song is my new favourite song

i never got the reference before

“and as we kissed and said goodnight, an nightingale sang in berkeley square:

GAY

SO GAY

i love

-

the end of the credits “For Terry”

ACTUAL OUT LOUD SOBBING

TERRY YOU WOULD’VE LOVED THIS

NEIL DID YOU PROUD

-

oh this was so beautiful

i’m gonna watch it again with my family probably within the week. i’m so emotionally tender now

azIRAPHALE WAS SO FLUFFY AND CROWLEY WAS SO NICE ABOUT THE BOOKS

ugh i love them more than ever

anathema...... i don’t know if i relate to her, want to be her, look up to her, want her to mentor me, live with her, or find her attractive. maybe all of the above. but she was freaking PERFECT. PE R F E CT 

the casting was so... just right. thank you casting people for anathema.

like... i also didn’t mind the newt/anathema thing so much now. it was hard to tell in the book how much of a relationship they had after, but that smile she gave while lying in bed the morning after, that worked, it said a lot. and i like that it was her choice to burn the prophecy sequel rather than newt’s suggestion

gabriel was amusing. like.. i’m glad he wasn’t in the book. but he was great here. also really like michael and uriel. uriel was so damn beautiful.

i also would really have liked to see a mention of the fact crowley and aziraphale are both agender and potentially asexual. not even a hint of it here. buuuuuut it guess i know from the book. so.

my favourite episode was of course episode 3 with crowley and aziraphale’s 6000 year backstory. especially the 1940s bit where crowley saved the books <3

this show was was less confusing than the book too. ugh it was done so well

OH

we didn’t see where the soldier guy went when aziraphale zapped him away!!! in the book he reappeared safely back home and went out to see his family. to be fair i don’t know whether he died and went to heaven, but it was a nice thing to happen

and they took out the Them’s bully/rival gang, who was led by the third baby from the baby swap, and who won awards for his tropical fish. at least that’s what i remember. which meant the parallel about heaven/hell being rival gangs was lost here. but the parallel between the horsemen and the them was stronger than ever and i loved that.

look, i mean, 10 out of 10, EASY.

favourite thing? yes. yes, absolutely.

--

shoutout to the one time i wrote a Good Omens/Destiel crossover fic The Angel Cake Challenge

IT’S 04:02am THIS TOOK ME 12 HOURS

04:40am AND FORTY MINUTES TO EDIT

congrats if you made it to the end of this!!! thank you for reading <3 AND GO WATCH THE SHOW IF YOU HAVEN’T ALREADY

[neshabeingchildish]

Henry has a lot of inner thoughts that I’d italicized, but Tumblr always undoes that. So, the link is here because Idk that I’ll feel like going through to italicize it all again.

Mob Boss Joss Moss

Joss wasn't ready to jump to any immediate action on this matter. Firstly, although she was convinced, she would definitely have to have proof before just disappearing some kid in Swellview. She didn't have that kind of steelo just yet. A town like this, a kid goes missing and that's grounds to shut the whole town down. Bet it Kid Danger goes missing… well that meant that Captain Man had to show up. "Henry. Why don't we go back inside? I've got a little business with Natalie. You can wash up and get dressed and get ready to indulge." She gave him a point on the nose and turned to head to the beach house.

"I like indulging," Henry said, bashfully. His phone was inside. He didn't really need it. If the Man Cave needed him while he was in the water, they could reach him on the Whiz Watch. But, he checked it when he got inside, anyway. No signal. 

He set it down and Joss commented, "I'm having a bath drawn for us. There's dental supplies and refreshments waiting in there for you to get started while I quickly get up to speed on some business."

He blushed and nodded. Bath. For. Us? She and he? Like.. in the same…? Was it GO TIME?? More like HOE time, amarite? Nervous laughter. Why was he nervously laughing in his voiceover? Henry rushed into the bathroom and tried to contact Charlotte on his Whiz Watch. 

"Henry! Thank GOD! I've been trying to call you for… what are you wearing?"

"It's surf wear! But, I gotta tell you something. I think I'm in over my head. Joss had a bath drawn for us and I don't know what to do!"

"Get out of there! That lady Butler she has was in the store not too long ago and whatever she was up to, I know it was no good."

"Okay, so skip the bath, or…"

"SKIP THE BATH!" Charlotte screeched.

"Okay. I'll…" Joss came in and he shut off the connection. 

She raised her eyebrow and asked, "What the heck was that?"

"Nothing. Charlotte. I mean.. I've got one of those Pear watches that you can… SOooo… I don't know about this bath, Joss…"

"If you're shy, I'll turn around, so you can get in." She turned around and he nervously looked around the room. He couldn't see a way out. Maybe he'd get in the bath, and just have to try to escape later? What would Charlotte do? She'd consider the fact that I'm outnumbered and if I run, that many people will be after me on an island I'm not familiar with, with no Man Copter here to retrieve me yet. BUT, I can hide it out while they come to rescue me… They don't know where I am! Oh, but the location on my…

"Are you not interested in this, Henry?" Joss asked, with her back still turned.

"Of course I am…" he giggled and stepped into the tub in his surf short set. "I'm just gonna undress in here, beneath the bubbles and flower petals…" but within a few moments, he was passed out from the tonic that had been put into the bath. Joss grabbed a pair of rubber gloves from beneath the cabinet to let the water out without it touching her.

She whistled once and a few of her men came to collect him and bound him. "Search him for any devices that can be traced back to him, leave it all here and throw him in the boat." After that she took a shower. She smelled like beach.

.

Whenever the Man Copter hovered above the beach house, Charlotte read the scans. "Henry isn't here, but his stuff is." Captain Man went to go get it, in case there were henchmen waiting. There were. He fought them off, collected his things and got back into his ride. "We'll have to check all of the known Moss hideaways. Henry could be anywhere!” She was frustrated, but now wasn’t the time to vent her furious “I told all of you idiots” wrath… But, they’d better believe it was coming, eventually.

Captain Man, Schwoz and Jasper had separated to go check out hideouts as Charlotte found them and would alert the Man Cave whenever they located Henry, so that Captain Man would rush to the rescue. Charlotte wanted to go too, but she felt very passionately about making sure that Henry was found, before he was seriously hurt or something.

.

Henry blinked his eyes and his vision came in, a little blurry, but he realized soon that he was either drugged or bound or both. “Shwhat?” He said.

“Hello, Henry,” Joss said, now wearing an all black suit, with a team of decoys behind her and Natalie with her arms folded, glaring.

“This bath is trippy,” Henry said and laughed. 

“It’s the tonic that we slipped in it that has you trippy, Cute Stuff.” She said, leaning closer to him. “Don’t worry, it’ll wear off by the time Captain Man gets here.”

“Captain Man is coming here? You know him?” Henry asked.

“I know that you do, and that’s enough for me,” she said, turned on the balls of her feet and said, “Lock it up.” 

Henry eventually really came to inside of this cell, tied up with his arms out and legs down, like he was being crucified, and honestly, he was more worried about ow Charlotte was gonna nail him to the cross whenever he made it back to the Man Cave. What was she gonna say to him. “You were thinking with Jasper’s brain again, Henry. You do stupid stuff, Henry. She’s not even that cute and you got yourself drugged and tied up! Should’ve just let her kill you for being stupid! Naw… Charlotte would never go that far.” He tried to focus his eyes and study the room. His head was still spinning a little. “But, she warned me to be careful and I absolutely did not…” He noticed an opening in the ceiling where a vent was and began to look to see if he could possibly maneuver his way up there from where he was. “The gag is I literally tried to think with Charlotte’s brain, at every turn. Well, I didn’t TRY, but I kept finding myself doing that. Whenever you know somebody that smart, you try to see the world through their eyes, to make yourself better. You’re not supposed to view the world through… your one eyed monster…” He threw his head back and now said, “Charlotte, if you save me, I promise to not think with the wrong head again!”

Charlotte heard him speaking in the background somewhere. “Hen!” She whispered to herself. Wherever Joss had the camera that Charlotte planted on her, that’s where she was keeping Henry, or at least where he was being monitored from. She tracked it and tried to get in touch with the others, to let them know where Henry actually was… “Schwoz! I’ve found Henry. I’m sending the address out right now.”

Schwoz said, “I seem to have fallen into a boobsie trap. I am going to need to figure out a way to get out of here. Go on without me.”

“Wait. Those places have boobie traps! That means Jasper has probably gotten trapped too!” She tried to get in touch with Jasper, who was in fact, caught in a trap, but able to reach his phone. He pressed the button, then dropped it though and groaned trying to reach it. “Jasper? Jasper? Are you stuck in a boobie trap?”

“More like a butt trap!” He yelled to the phone and looked behind him at the gobs of bubblegum he was stuck in. “I sure hope this is just pressed and not chewed gum…” 

She rolled her eyes and hung up. “Captain Man… If you tell me that you’re stuck in a boobie trap, I will lose it!”

“Okay. Then, I will not tell you that. But, if you can get Schwoz to come to where I am for something completely unrelated, that will be appreciated.” She hung up on him too. 

“I am the only professional in this outfit!” She screamed, grabbing rescue gear. Those idiots in the traps would have to fend for themselves for a moment. She’d send the police to try to help, but Henry was actually in the clutches of a villain, so that’s where she was headed first. She probably should go to Ray first… but… No… These are the same people who (not knowing that he was Captain Man) were going to barbeque someone! She had to get to Henry in a hurry. She hated driving, but Henry was in trouble and her heart was beating in her throat now that she remembered that he could be being roasted on an open fire. “Henry, if you die before I can rescue you, I am gonna kill you dead!” 

.

Henry took a deep breath and struggled again to at least budge his restraints, but it was no good. He only tired himself out for the fifth time and now, he had to catch his breath again. Besides, they were probably watching him, anyways. He started (now) looking to see if he could detect any hidden cameras and wondering about if help was on the way. Probably not. Charlotte told him to get out of there and what did he do? Get in the bathtub and got himself skin drugged. He didn’t even know that was possible. But, what could he have done? Maybe mushed Joss in the face and took off running? But, if she wasn’t a mobster chick and he’d just mushed her face and ran, imagine the backlash for that!

Henry Hart, the Playground Pooper has entered news today again, after pushing Joss Moss’s face with his wide open hand and leaving abruptly following a fun date! Like… I need another L this year. My biggest L is not listening to Charlotte. I shouldn’t even have been on the date! I guess… I was really just trying to keep my mind off of all the weirdness with her lately. I don’t even know if she knows, but I KNOW, so… I don’t know, you know? WHO am I speaking with, here? This is an inner-monologue. Why ask ‘you know?’ to yourself, Dude? And now, you’re just off topic…

He thought that he saw a small flicker of a light in the corner. But, probably not. Charlotte was most likely doing everything in her power to get him home safely. The others probably were doing… well… what they could. Now, all he could think about was how he might die here. He might not get out. He might not get rescued. He might die and Charlotte might not ever know that he thought about her. 

If I make it out of here, I should at least tell her about that weird inception dream that I had where she was dreaming about me kissing her. She’ll think that means that I wanna kiss her though, and I DON’T… But… I will if she figures out a way to save me. Ugh. She’d probably hate that. She’ll probably hate to hear that I had this dream. She’ll probably ask, “Why couldn’t you just dream about kissing me? Why dream about me dreaming about kissing you?” And give me the most wrinkled ‘You’re an idiot’ grimace that her face can contort into. 

Man… My arms and legs are gonna be so sore. I could really use a sit in Piper’s massage chair when I get out of here. The things that I wouldn’t do to be in that chair again… I hope that Charlotte remembers me a hero, and not an idiot. Why am I back on this Charlotte line of thinking? I need to be thinking LIKE Charlotte to get out of here, not ABOUT Charlotte…

He sighed and threw his head back again, wishing that he was drugged again. All of his muscles were hurting, at this point and he could simply die, to be honest. He was ready. “I’m ready to die, now!” He called out, to whoever was probably watching him. 

“You’d better not be!” He heard Charlotte snap in s low hiss.

His head perked up and... yes! She came through the door and there were two guards unconscious in front of it. She had the look on her face, but he knew that she didn’t have time to really give it to him, so she was in there, getting him down, with the door jammed opened, so that nobody could shut her inside while she cut him loose.

“I expected to find Captain Man to the rescue, but somehow… This will bring me more pleasure,” Joss said,  when she saw her on the camera. “I’m going to go handle this,” she told Natalie. “Have the clean up crew on standby.”

Charlotte had almost gotten Henry loose when she heard the clacking of shoes coming down the hallway and she said, “It’s Joss!” Henry was released enough to free himself and she really didn’t want to be trapped in there, too, with all the guys incapacitated, so she said, “Be right back!” And got out of the room. 

She saw Joss, standing on the far end. She stopped walking and shook her head. “This was a very stupid thing for a girl as smart as you to do, Charlotte.”

“Bold of you to think that I’ve been working with him for all these years and a little bit of stupid didn’t rub off,” Charlotte said, smoothly and pointed a thumb at Henry, who was trying to free himself. 

“It’s not ‘a little stupid’ it’s VERY stupid,” Joss reiterated. 

“Look, I don’t really like to do a lot of overexertion, so can the fight sequence start? Because the sooner it starts, the sooner it ends, and an episode of Titans drops tonight…” Charlotte said, unphased. “Oh, but… you don’t blink for bugs,” Charlotte said. 

“Thank you for reminding me,” Joss said and then clacked her fan, which sent a small army of Joss decoys charging at Charlotte.

She reached for her zapper and shook her head, “You hate to see it,” she said and began to zap each of them down until they stopped coming for her. By that time, Henry had gotten himself free. “She knows who you are, so you might as well get ready for the fight.”

“The fight. It’s just her. We can just take her in,” Henry said, pointing a hand at Joss. Joss smirked and took off running, Charlotte gave chase, almost immediately. There was no way she was letting her get away! Henry blew a bubble and headed in that direction, too… but henchmen came. “OF COURSE!” He grumbled and began to fight them off as Charlotte vanished behind Joss through a door that shut after she went through. CHAR! He fought the henchmen down and went to try to find Charlotte, just in case she was rushing into another trap. Joss really didn’t seem to like her. But, he couldn’t budge the door… “Char!” He screamed.

“Henry?” She called back. “Ummm… This is a trap…” She said. “I think I can make it out. Go around and try to get her!” 

He nodded, but when he turned, Joss was right there and she spun around and kicked him in the face. “Oh my God! That hurt!” Joss let out a loud shriek and kicked him again as he leaned over and knocked him out that time. She shook her head at her henchmen and decoys, then opened the door for Charlotte who rushed out and immediately checked on Henry.

“There is more danger where this came from,” she said, smugly.

Charlotte nodded her head, gently set Henry’s on the ground and stood up. “Yeah, there is. For you!”

[band-blogging]

iRobot

Request: Could you do one-shot with Josh Dun based by song Irobot by Jon Bellion?I thing you would do amazing because because the one with alien was soooo goood… (I hope my grammar was good😂)

Characters: Josh Dun x Reader, Tyler Joseph

Warnings: Talk of anxiety, cursing, death

Josh remembers you so clearly, every detail, even now. Even after everything that’s happened.

He remembers your smile, even though it took you a while to show him how beautiful it was. He remembers how carefully you chose your words, how each one held meaning no matter how insignificant they may have been to anyone else. He remembers your lips, how they looked, the way they moved when you spoke. How they felt.

He never imagined you would turn on him. But he should have known.

He remembers your shaking hands as you held a gun in your hand, the barrel pointed towards his chest. You were silent in the moment and he can still see the tears brimming in your eyes. You were never heartless, even though that’s what some people assumed. You were just broken, maybe more so than himself. 

But you refused to open up to him or to anyone. Not fully. Your eyes weren’t full of life like other’s were. They seemed dull, and he hated that he knew why.

He remembers the slight rasp in your voice. How it was never perfectly smooth.

He thought it was beautiful.

But you spoke to him more clearly then you ever had when you were about to kill him. He could tell you were doing your best to keep your voice from shaking, but he could still hear it. He had learned to pick up those little things about you.  

“I’m sorry.” 

The only thing he doesn’t remember clearly is when you pulled the trigger. The bullet shot toward him and everything happened in an instant. He was on the ground, bleeding, gasping for air that wouldn’t come no matter how hard he tried to fill his lungs. 

He remembers your last word, the last word he heard from you, at least. A broken sob that sounded like his name.

Then he remembers seeing flashes of his messed up life, going in between memories and a blackness that he had never experienced. He didn’t think things could get that dark. 

That was the day that Joshua Dun died.

You remember the first time you pulled the trigger. It hit the target that had been set up in front of you near the edge and you remember the disappointed sighs of the people who thought you would be a better shot.

You remember the face of the first man you almost killed, and you remember collapsing in front of him, dropping the gun with tears streaming down your face, trying not to acknowledge the fact that oh my god, I almost killed him.

You remember the first time you pulled the trigger. The first time you took someone’s life. You remember the second time and the third time and you remember their names and the reason they couldn’t live and what they looked like and you remember all of the nights you’ve stayed awake because when you close your eyes, they’re suddenly in front of you again. They’re crying and they’re asking you things: why did you let this happen, why did you do this to us, why did you put us through this, why did you put yourself through this-

I don’t know, I don’t know, I don’t know I don’t knowIdon’tknowIdon’tknow-

You remember torturing yourself night after night because of the horrible things that you have done, yet you still do it because you have to. You’ve dug yourself into a hole and you’ve been finding that digging in is much easier than climbing out. 

You remember trying to tell them that you couldn’t do it anymore. You could feel yourself slowly going insane and you knew that if you kept going you were going to break. 

It’s not easy, you knew that coming in.

They told you there was no way, they tried to be decent and not tell you what would really happen. 

And you didn’t realize what they meant when they said they knew you wouldn’t leave until you saw her picture on a screen. She was their leverage, that one little detail that was actually the most important thing in your life and they knew they had you moving in the direction they needed you to move. 

That’s my sister.

It was an obvious move. You’re not a pawn, they haven’t degraded you to something that insignificant. You’re more like a bishop, and you’ve sacrificed yourself trying to protect the queen. Your queen.

The only person that’s ever mattered. 

You’re going to do what we say, no questions asked.

And you nodded because you’ve been in this long enough to know that bluffs don’t exist. They know where your sister lives and they know where she works and what she looks like and you know exactly what they would do if you were to walk out. They know how they would make you the first person to find out that she’s gone. They know exactly how to break you and they’ve done a great job so far.

You remember thinking of him as a distraction at first. A distraction from everything horrible and wrong in your life. You remember feeling something for him a few weeks after it started…something real, and thinking what the hell have I done when you realized that maybe you actually wanted to be with him. 

You remember Josh the same way he remembers you. 

Both of you were just out of reach. 

You go to the same coffee shop at least once a week, just to make life seem somewhat normal. More normal than it really is. 

You sit in the same booth everyday, in the back corner of the shop, hidden from prying eyes. 

You pull out your phone, sighing when you see you have a few texts.

It wasn’t uncommon for you to have a text from an unknown number telling you that they wanted to meet with you at some random location. Your number has been distributed so that people can contact you if they have certain things that need to be taken care of. Things that they can’t do if it means having blood on their hands. 

You’re in too deep and wouldn’t it be a waste of energy, all that digging, to just stop with no way of climbing out. Better to just go deeper.

Then, under the vague text from the stranger that has every intention of making you kill someone, is a text from your sister. 

Y/S/N: Hey! I was wondering if you would want to come over tonight. I want you to meet my boyfriend

You smile, remembering when your sister told you about this perfect guy that she had met the other day. You had told her how happy you were for her, I can’t wait to meet him!

Y/N: See you tonight!!

Y/S/N: Awesome! He invited his friend over too, so you’ll get to meet them both

She doesn’t know. 

She doesn’t know about the job and the innocent people that you’re forced to kill. But she knows that you’re struggling and she knows that when you show up at her house, tears in your eyes and guilt evident in your expression that all you need is someone to sit with you so that you know you’re not alone. Because that’s something that you desperately need to be reminded.

She thinks you have anxiety. She thinks that’s the cause of your shaking hands and your nightmares and constant paranoia, and maybe that’s part of it. Maybe that’s what has developed over years of killing innocents. Goddamn anxiety. 

But your hands only shake when you’re not holding a gun and you’re only paranoid when you’re around her because, oh god, what if they’re here? What if they take her from me?

You’re fine other then that, you smile when you know people expect you too and act like a normal, excited sister when she tells you about her boyfriend. 

He’s perfect! Oh my god, what if we get married? What if he’s the one? Y/N, he’s amazing!

She never stops talking about him. This perfect boyfriend that tends to her every need and seems to care more about her then he cares about himself. 

And he can sing and play piano and his friend plays drums and they want to start a band, how hot is that

You hold your phone in one hand, ringing the doorbell to her two-story house with the other, hearing her footsteps quickly approaching. 

You smile softly at your sister, who is looking at you with messy hair and wide eyes that tells you that you may have interrupted her and this perfect boyfriend of hers. 

“Do I need to have the sex talk with you that mom never had?” 

She rolls her eyes and takes your arm, pulling you in the house. 

“Can you keep your voice down?” she scolds, smacking your arm. “He’s here you know.” 

“I can’t, actually. And I also don’t care,” you say, smirking at her. “So, where is he?” 

“In the living room, so hurry up and take your coat off, I want you to meet him.” 

“Stop rushing me.” 

Once you’ve put all your stuff down, she takes your arm again and pulls you through the kitchen, into the living room where her boyfriend is waiting on the couch with his hands in his lap and his face flushed.

“Tyler,” your sister says, getting the brown haired boy’s attention, “this is my sister, Y/N.” 

You smile, giving him a little wave as he stands. 

“Hey, nice to meet you,” Tyler says. “I’ve heard a lot about you.” 

“Oh man, you must hate me already,” you say, making him laugh.

“I only told him the embarrassing stuff.” 

“Fantastic.” 

Tyler laughs at the two of you and you take the opportunity you have.

“Well, I’ve heard a lot about you,” you tell Tyler, almost laughing when your sister tenses next to you. “Musician, singer, extremely attractive.” 

Y/S/N’s eyes widen and not long after you feel her elbow connect with your hip, making you gasp. 

“Jerk.” 

You laugh along with Tyler, who walks up to your sister and wraps an arm around her waist, planting a kiss on her forehead. 

“You’re so cute, babe,” he says with a laugh, looking down at your pouting sister.

Another knock at the door interrupts your laughter and Tyler perks up.

“That’s probably Josh, I’ll get it.” 

Once Tyler is out of the room, Y/S/N looks at you expectantly. 

“He’s alright,” you say with a shrug, trying to force the smile off your face. 

“Oh, come on,” Y/S/N groans, “you’re being difficult.” 

“Am I? I didn’t notice.” 

That earns you a punch in the stomach and you double over, surprised at how strong your sister has gotten.

“Unnecessary.” 

“Yeah, man, it’s good to see you,” you hear an unfamiliar voice say in the hallway, making you force yourself to stand up straight, shooting your sister a glare. 

“This my friend, Josh.” 

In and out, remember?

Don’t get caught.

A gas station seems a good enough place to kill someone. You wouldn’t know, you’ve never killed someone in a gas station. 

The tv is running in the background, a bit too loud for your liking. You hear it running through commercials and you suddenly feel the need to take your gun out and shoot it from the painful irony of the words it’s spitting at you. 

Are you ready for a change?

You keep your hands at your sides as you make your way through the short isles of chips and candy, back towards the bathrooms. 

The newspaper stand is set up in a rather convenient spot, just out of sight of the cashier and the limited number of customers. 

You pull your matchbox from your pocket and light one, looking over your shoulder before letting the match light the small pile of newspapers. 

“Fire!” you scream, rushing out from the back, waving your arms frantically to get everyone’s attention. “There’s a fire, everyone get out!” 

Screams erupt from the few customers as they run from the shop, the cashier getting out as well. You go to the men and women’s bathrooms and bang on the door to both, shouting the same thing. 

“There’s a fire, get out!” 

People rush from the bathrooms and you wait by the doors, taking the arm of a familiar man when he rushes out of the men’s bathroom, stopping him by the flaming newspapers. 

“What the hell? Let go of me, you crazy bitch.” 

You scowl at him and wait for the few men in the bathroom to run out, their actions frantic and fast, so fast that they don’t notice you holding the man back against the wall. 

“Who the hell do you think you are? We have to get out, can’t you see the-” 

“Shut up,” you growl, pushing him back into the men’s bathroom with your arm across his chest. 

“Don’t make any noise and this will go a lot easier for both of us.” 

You pull your gun out and hold it against his stomach, making him freeze. He looks down at you with wide eyes, but keeps his mouth shut. 

“Do you know this man?” you ask, pulling out a picture of your boss from your pocket.

Your boss is known by a very limited number of people, and he happens to know of a certain journalist who is starting to gather information on him to write an article. 

This journalist is currently shaking in your grip, trying to convince you to spare his life. 

He takes one look at the picture in your hand and his eyes widen. 

“That’s a yes, then.” 

One twitch of the finger. One little tick that has the power to end someone’s life. 

You remember his face. Of course you remember it. You remember his face, his name, the reason, the location. You remember everything, just like all the others. 

There wasn’t much you needed to do to dispose of the body, that would be taken care of for you. 

There are perks to lighting a fire at a gas station.

You remember those dreadful words, the ones you had been hoping she would never say to you. 

“You guys would be perfect together.”

No we wouldn’t you want to scream we wouldn't because I’m an assassin but, hey, thanks for the effort. 

Y/S/N has been trying to set you up with someone for as long as you can remember, claiming that you need to get out there and have fun and do dumb single stuff with her (not anymore, apparently), and you’ve turned every offer down. 

There’s not much harm in spending time with your sister in her home, where nothing can happen and you could protect her if something did. Outside of that, it’s too open and there are too many people and not all of them could be who they say they are. You figure you’re better safe than sorry. 

It’s the same with getting attached to anyone else, which is why you would much rather stay out of the dating pool. 

“And I knew you were going to say no, so I already set it up. You’re meeting him at that coffee shop you always go to at six.” 

“Wait- you what?” 

“Please don’t be mad, I just feel like you need someone there to, you know… support you.” 

She’s looking at you with sympathy in her eyes and you want to scream at her.

No, I’m not struggling with anxiety that’s not what this is.

“Look,” you say, pinching the bridge of your nose, “it would be a lot better for me to just stay single, okay? I’m perfectly capable of taking care of myself, despite what you think.” 

You know she doesn’t believe you, she’s told you before that she doesn’t think she can trust your judgement because of the anxiety that you apparently have. 

I see your hands shaking, Y/N. I know about the nightmares and I know that you cry yourself to sleep sometimes. You need help. 

“Please, just…just go on this one. This is it, if it doesn’t go well, then you don’t have to go on anymore. Please, for me.” 

You think it over; pros and cons.

Pro: You would make your sister happy, which, at this point, is the only thing you’d willingly do without feeling immense guilt afterwords.

Con: You would put this person in danger.

Pro: Your sister wants you to.

Con: Just more blood on your hands.

Pro: Your sister wants you to.

“One date,” you say with a defeated sigh. “One.”

“Of course.”

You should have expected it. You walked into the coffee shop and wanted to laugh out loud when you saw a familiar puff of yellow hair on a head that was turned away from you.

“Josh?”

He turns around, his smile falling when he sees you.

Glad I can get those real reactions from men.

“Y/N?”

You chuckle as you sit across from him, wrapping your hands around the coffee you had ordered when you first arrived at the shop.

“Don’t look too disappointed,” you say with a forced smile pointed towards your coffee. You may have been very against going on this date, but you still have feelings and Josh looked pretty disappointed when he saw you.

“No! No, God no, that’s not…I just didn’t…I didn’t think this would be with someone I knew.”

“Did Y/S/N force you into this?”

Josh chuckles, holding his own coffee, one size larger than your own.

“Yeah, kinda…” he says sheepishly. “She told me it was a perfect mach.” 

“Yeah, well, she says a lot of things.

You both laugh, but yours immediately stops when something on the tv screen in the corner catches your attention.

Yesterday at 5:00pm there was an explosion at a gas station in Columbus, Ohio. Investigators say the explosion started inside the store and a body was found in the bathroom. The body cannot be identified, police are still investigating the scene.

“Are you alright?”

You turn your attention back to Josh, meeting his concerned gaze, watching him glance at the tv screen behind him.

“Yeah, yeah, I’m fine. It’s just, um…it’s sad, you know? That man that died at the gas station.”

“Yeah, it is.”

The rest of the night is spent talking about things that you haven’t talked about with anyone for a long time and you don’t want to admit it, but it’s so refreshing to talk about this with someone and you don’t realize how late you’ve stayed talking to Josh until the barista tells you they’re closing. 

“Hey, um…do you want to come back to my place? I’ve had a great time and I’d love to talk some more.” 

You shouldn’t. You can’t. But it sounds so inviting and you haven’t talked to someone like this in so long and at this point you figure might as well, we’ve talked for this long. What’s the harm? 

What’s the harm?

You know from a lot of experience that those words are very dangerous. 

“No way,” Josh laughs, throwing his head back.

“Yeah, I swear it happened. Y/S/N shoved me into him and he spilled his coffee all over me, then said he ‘didn’t think it would work out’ and left.” 

Josh bursts into laughter, doubling over on the couch. You giggle along with him, waiting for him to stop laughing.

“Okay, your turn.” 

“Alright, um…” he pauses, trying to think of another breakup story he has, “Tyler and I went out one night and he introduced me to this girl and apparently I looked like this guy that had cheated on her and she was pretty drunk, so she gave me a mean right hook, then poured the remnants of her drink on me.” 

You burst out laughing, almost in the same position Josh was from your story. 

“Are you serious?” 

“Dead,” Josh laughs. “To this day, Tyler still brings it up around all of our friends. ‘Hey guys, remember that time Josh was almost knocked out by a drunk chick?’ ‘Do you guys remember when Josh was mistaken for a cheater?’ It sucks sometimes.” 

“I bet it does.” 

You and Josh laugh until your stomachs hurt and you hate that you’re having such a good time. 

“Well, I should get going,” you say after about an hour of telling the best stories you can come up with. “I…had a really good time.” 

You feel like a lovestruck teenager and you hate it.

“I did too,” Josh smiles. “We…um…do you want to do it again?” 

No, I don’t. I really, really don’t. Don’t you dare say yes, I swear to God if you say yes-

“I’d love too.” 

Dammit.

Josh smiles and leans forward, pressing a kiss to your cheek. 

“See you soon.” 

“You were out for hours,” Y/S/N squeals when you walk through the door, jumping up from the couch that she was obviously waiting for you on. “I was beginning to think you weren’t going to come back until tomorrow morning.” 

You smack her arm and take your coat off, trying to fight the smile off your face. 

“I except him to kiss me before anything like that happens.”

“Wait,” Y/S/N freezes, “He didn’t kiss you? That pussy.” 

“He kissed my cheek, but we both know that doesn’t count.” 

She laughs and you smile at her, but it falls when your phone begins to ring. 

“I should take this…” 

You sister gives you a concerned look, but nods, stepping out of your way so you can answer the call in the makeshift office she has set up, closing the door behind you.

“Hello?” 

Was it you?

You close your eyes when you hear the familiar rasp of your boss’s voice, anger evident in his tone. 

“What are you talking about?” 

You know what. You were the one who caused the explosion at the gas station, that’s how you decided to carry out your most recent job. 

“What’s wrong with it? You gave me a job and I did it.” 

Don’t be a smart ass, Y/L/N. You were careless. Stupid. Don’t slip up like this again or I swear-

“I know,” you say, peeking out to make sure your sister isn’t listening, “I know, you don’t have to remind me.” 

Don’t screw up like this again. I’m not going to be the one busting you out when you get your ass thrown in prison.

The line cuts off and you sigh, pulling the phone away from your ear, feeling it tremble in your hand. 

“No, stop, stop, stop,” you whisper, trying to steady the shaking. You can’t help it. You’re terrified.

“Y/N?”

You wipe your eyes and walk out of the office, smiling at your sister.

“Is everything okay?” 

You nod, but your sister immediately looks down at your hands. 

“You’re shaking, Y/N, you’re obviously not okay.” 

You shake you head and ball your hands into fists so she can’t see them begin to shake harder.

“I’m just going to go, okay?” 

“Who was that on the phone?” 

You shake your head again and push past her, ignoring her shouts for you to tell her the truth. 

“Who was on the damn phone, Y/N?” 

“It was my boss, now let it go!” 

“Who the hell is your boss? Why do you let him scare you like this?” 

I love you, and if I tell you now I’ll be betraying you.

“I’m leaving,” you mumble, despite your sister’s protests. “I’ll see you later.” 

He kissed you. He leaned forward and kissed you and god, he’s such an idiot but he wants to kiss you again and again until all you know how to do is attach your lips to his. 

“How could you let this happen?” he can hear Tyler ask him as he moves his lips against yours, his arms wrapping around your waist. “This wasn’t the plan.” 

Screw the plan.

Screw this and screw that and screw him and just screw it.

Tyler doesn’t know what he’s talking about. 

He kissed you and kissed you and kissed you and he should regret it but he doesn’t because, God, it felt good. 

You kissed him back and he wrapped his arms around you tightly, hoping you wouldn’t slip away from him. 

“I have to go,” you told him after, leaving him with wet lips and a heavy heart because he wishes it wasn’t you. This would be so much easier if it wasn’t you. 

You left and he knew he couldn’t let it go any farther. He needed to end things and finish what he started.

“You let this happen,” Tyler said, rightfully so. “You did this to yourself.” 

Months go by. Months before Josh knows that things have gone on for too long. He’s in too deep and, yes, you’re everything he’s ever imagined, but he’s afraid Tyler might do the job for him if he doesn’t do it soon.

“You’re such an idiot,” Tyler kept telling him. “How could do this?” He doesn’t know.

His relationship with Y/S/N might have been for show, but yours never was. It was the one thing that he could hold onto when he had nothing left. That was his reason. You kept him fighting. You gave him hope that one day he could be happy and he didn’t want to let that go.

“You have to break things off with Y/S/N,” he told Tyler.

“I already did. I hope that encourages you to move a bit faster.” 

Don’t you get it? he wants to scream, I can’t.

He’s falling. He’s falling hard and by the time he hits the ground he doesn’t think he’ll be able to get back up.

Better to end things before the ground gets too close.

You get a text from a mysterious number telling you to meet them at their address, per usual. Nothing out of the ordinary.

You stuff your gun in its holster, ready to get this meeting over with so you can see Y/S/N. She’s been extremely upset these past few days.

You show up at the address the text from your next client told you to meet at with your gun in your bag- just in case- and walk in quickly, trying not to draw too much attention from outsiders. 

“Hello?” 

The house is silent and it makes you feel uneasy, but you continue walking, going through a hallway that leads you to a kitchen. 

You close your eyes, letting out a sigh when you feel a gun pressed against your back. An all too familiar feeling.

You reach towards your holster slowly and whip around, pointing your gun at whoever is behind you. 

“Josh?” 

You stare at him, the man you had considered giving your heart to, standing here, ready to put a bullet through it. 

He doesn’t say anything. 

Better not to say anything then let words get in the way.

“What is this?” 

You should’ve known. You should’ve known that your happiness could never have been real. 

It was nice to pretend.  

“This is the job. You should understand,” he says, “you know where both of our priorities lie.” 

You know exactly what he’s talking about. His weakness, like yours, is another person. Another human being who’s being held hostage by another sick, sick monster. 

“Who is it?” 

He chuckles, humorless and full of remorse and regret and so much guilt. 

“My sister. Just like you.” 

You shift, switching the gun from your left hand to your right, keeping it pointed at his chest. 

“I’ll explain it to you,” he says, his words soft and calm, as if he isn’t holding you at gun point. As if he isn’t being held at gun point. “My boss is one of your boss’s biggest enemies. What better way is there to beat him then to kill the person who does all the dirty work?” 

“You make it sound so simple.” 

You almost see a smile, a slight twitch of his lips, but its gone before you can confirm it was ever there.

“I don’t have a choice.” 

You don’t think you’ve ever felt so angry at anyone in your entire life. 

“You’re sick,” you spit at him. “You let me fall for you…why? So you could rub it in my face?” 

What makes you think I didn’t want you as bad as you wanted me.

“That’s not what happened.”

You shake your head at him, not believing that this is real.

“And Y/S/N? Was it ever real with her and Tyler? It was all just part of the plan, right?” 

“We had to, you have to understand-” 

“She texted me a couple days ago. Said he broke things off, didn’t even give her a reason. Just up and left. They were together, what, five months? And we were together for four, right?” 

“You know as well as I do that you would’ve done the same thing.” 

“I wouldn’t have fallen for the person I was supposed to kill! That’s cruel! T-to both of us. Even after everything, I still have some decency, and I’ve done some pretty messed up things, you have no idea.” 

Josh nods, and you assume he knows what you’ve done. 

“You should’ve made it quick. Just put me out of my misery the minute you got me alone.” 

“That’s what you would’ve wanted?” 

“Over this? Yeah, I think so.” 

He nods, his gun still pointed at your chest, in the same spot yours is pointed at his. 

“Then I’m sorry.” 

You scoff and shake your head. 

“You shouldn’t have dragged Y/S/N into this.” 

“Maybe not,” Josh says, keeping his eyes locked with yours. “It was Tyler’s idea.” 

“She thought he was the one, you know. She told me,” you inform him. “Does he feel guilty at all?” 

No answer.

You stare at him, watching him walk closer to you. You tense and thrust your gun towards him, making him stop.

“I swear, if you take another step I’ll blow your brains out.” 

“I guess I’ll stay here, then.” 

You consider asking him if he’ll let you call your sister, just to tell her you love her. You might not walk out of the house, and if Josh is going to be the one to kill you, maybe he’ll be sympathetic enough to let you talk to her one last time. 

But you wait, keeping as still as you can as you try not to tremble.

“Was it real?”

It’s a fair question. All of those nights spent talking and kissing and telling each other that everything’s going to be okay, even though neither of you knew what “it” was. All of the unspoken words and claims of affection that may or may not have been true. 

“It wasn’t supposed to be.” 

You scoff and shake your head again, watching his rigid demeanor start to crack, his regret showing through. 

“What do you mean ‘it wasn’t supposed to be?’ how is that supposed to justify-” 

“I made a mistake,” he snaps, silencing you. “A huge, idiotic mistake, because I wanted to believe that I had a chance at feeling what I felt with you. Happiness. Something I haven’t felt in a long time.

“And, believe me, I tried to stop myself from falling for you, but you were everything and I couldn’t help myself.”

You stare at him, wanting to tell him that it was the exact same thing for you, but not wanting to give him the satisfaction of a heartfelt response.

“Are you going to shoot me?” 

“That depends,” he pauses, taking one risky step closer to you. “Are you going to be the first to pull the trigger?” 

Tick tock tick tock, times running out. Better be the first, better be the one to walk out.

“Does it scare you?” he asks suddenly.

“What?” 

“Holding someone’s life in your hands and deciding to pull the trigger.” 

It terrifies you. 

“You know I would be lying if I said no.” 

There’s a silence, a long, painful silence that makes everything good and pure about Josh and your time with him rush back in that moment.

“Should I say something to you?” you ask eventually. “If one of us is going to die, what are we going to say to the other? Those ‘last words’ that everyone makes such a big deal about.” 

He thinks for a moment and you’re terrified that his choice of last words might be something that will make you drop the gun and tell him to put you out of your misery. 

“I-” 

“I swear to god, Joshua. Don’t you dare.” 

He smiles, a small tug at the corner of his mouth.

“How about…I’m sorry.” 

Good enough. Better than the alternative.

“That works.” 

He nods, content with his words.

“Your turn.” 

“I’m sorry too.”

You pull the trigger a second too soon because he had a look on his face that told you he wanted to say something else. 

The bullet leaves your gun and it’s too late to do anything about it now. It hits him with an all too familiar bang that’s gotten louder every time you’ve pulled the trigger and the ringing in your ears is so loud that you can barely hear anything else. It’s all just background noise.

But you hear Josh gasp for breath. You hear him say your name. You don’t hear anything after that, falling into something that could be classified as shock. 

You’ve never had to kill someone this close before. 

But, in the end, it had to be done. You know that. She would’ve died if you hadn’t because your boss would know you let yourself die at the hands of an enemy. He would’ve given you what he believed you deserved. 

“J-Josh…” 

Maybe you shouldn’t have done it. But you shouldn’t have done a lot of things that day. You shouldn’t have thought so selfishly when you pulled the trigger, your thoughts of your sister as you did so. You shouldn’t have called an ambulance on a dying man to make yourself feel better about shooting him.

You shouldn’t have fallen in love. 

But Josh was just so perfect and he was there all the time, when you had your night terrors and when your “anxiety” acted up. And you were there for him in the exact same situations. 

You should have given him better words to die with. 

You shouldn’t have gone to see your sister in tears barely an hour after it happened, making her think your anxiety was at its worst. You suppose it was, in a way.

And, months later, you shouldn’t have been doing the exact some thing you were doing before, but that was where you were and there wasn’t much you could do to change that. 

And who knows? Maybe you shouldn’t have opened the mysterious blue letter addressed to you with a stamp that looked suspicious enough. The single slip of paper with a few simple words that you shouldn’t have read. 

But, God, are you glad you did.

I’m sorry I wasn’t good enough. -J

(x)

[authenticaussie]

Izou and Thatch for the pairing ask.

who’s the werewolf and who’s the hunter

Ooooo okay okay so like??? The thought of Izo as a hunter is really really cool but also it’s r EALLY REALLY FUNNY to imagine him being a werewolf and being SO MAD ABOUT IT. Because he sheds!!!! everywhere!!!! Every goddamn where!!! And the amount of clothes he’s ruined by accidentally shifting?! It drives him Crazy. Ofc tho to pass off his obsession w/ the moon is pretty simply - most people think that he’s eccentric, and saying that he’s “charting the planetary flow” and spouting over mumbo jumbo really easily deflects why he actually keeps an eye on it. I can totally see him having this nice apartment w/ pot plants on a balcony and EVERY SINGLE FUCKING FULL MOON, HE KILLS THEM, BC HIS WOLF!SELF IS LIKE, “GOTTA MARK MY TERRITORY”. No-one ever lets him take care of plants. Ever.  

And Thatch???? Thatch isn’t even a hunter. He’s the person who got called bc Izo’s apartment isn’t allowed pets and someone complained that Izo had this big dog and Izo’s like my good sir no I do Not, you can very obviously see I do not have space for a dog, and regardless, I hate dogs. They shed and break your stuff and I swear to god if I get humped by one one more time I am going to learn how to levitate. 

And like, Thatch was ??? a hunter?? But he’s….soft. He’s soft and squishy and hates to hurt and the whole “werewolves are totally and utterly evil” thing never ever sat right with him. So he went and got a job with animal control buttttttt…. yeah the training doesn’t leave you. And so he’s like “soooo there are no….special circumstances??? Surrounding your….dog??? Like….when he comes to visit?? During certain times of the month?? Like…at night……??”

“My good sir are you suggesting that I am a vampire???”

“No!!!” Thatch goes, “I’m suggesting you’re a werewolf!!” 

Three seconds later got him like: why did I say that

who’s the mermaid and who’s the fisherman

IZO MAKES THE PRETTIEST MERMAID,,,,,And like, just ??? All decked out in pearls that he found himself and strung together, and they’re so big and pretty and he’s found chunks of crystals and gone diving in ship wrecks and has thousands of dollars worth of jewellery wrapped around his tail that he likes because it’s sparkly and pretty and also surprisingly enough they make pretty good weapons???

Thatch is #wrecked Bc like??? ooo imagine pirate!thatch chasing down rumours of a mermaid, and a mermaid with a tail made of diamonds??? And finding out that his tail isn’t made of diamonds, but fuck they’re just as valuable, anyway, because of the gems – and then later on, not because of the gems, but just because it’s- Izo. And Izo is infinitely more valuable than any stone, because Izo laughs and teases and smiles and is so captivatingly beautiful. 

who’s the witch and who’s the familiar

Izo is the witch!!! Thatch is his faithful familiar. Well, more so faithful helper?? He’s a bit dorky and distracted but also he’d take curses for Izo if that’s what it took. Izo mainly does potions and is a decent witch - not amazing, but decent - and the reason Thatch is considered his familiar is bc when they were young izo tried to brew a “get me a girlfriend” spell for Thatch and it went So Badly and ended up giving him a biologically female body, which he FREAKED OUT about, and in izo’s attempt to fix it he accidentally gave Thatch a whole bunch of animals forms and so!! Thatch can shape-shift a bit xD Only into a couple of animals/objects tho, and only for an hour or two.    

who’s the barista and who’s the coffee addict

Surprisingly enough, Izo is the coffee addict?? Like, people think it’s Thatch because he’s so hyperactive, all the time, and Izo is constantly perfect that no-one thinks he ever has a time where he doesn’t look 10000% put together, but nope. Thatch has seen Izo in the 6am, when he’s just rolled out of bed and stumbled into Thatch’s cafe and been like give me coffee or death and Thatch is like one death coffee coming up!! And serves like, a triple shot black pffft xD

who’s the professor and who’s the TA

Thaaaaaaaaaaatch!! Thatch is the professor and Izo is the TA!! He’s distracted and loud and bouncy and forgets things constantly but like?? He’s really good at helping people. Students terrified of their thesises have gone to talk to him in a panic, asking to drop the course, and he manages to kick start their ideas and motivation and enjoyment and they walk out babbling to themselves because all of these thoughts! They know exactly what they’re doing! And Izo has never been able to figure it out; he’s given out schedules and colour-coding and he keeps thatch organised and on-time and helps with marking and meetings but- 

Thatch is the one that they flock too when they need it. People leave Izo’s office still looking vaguely worried, but Thatch’s students?? They could conquer the world after a meeting with Thatch. Izo thinks it’s fascinating and amazing and impressive because he’s never been able to do it or figure out how it works and he asks but Thatch just. It’s just Thatch.

who’s the knight and who’s the prince(ss)

Honestly, interchangeable??????? It’s hard bc like, whitebeard connection is undeniable, so like, why would one be a prince and one be a guard, you feel? But like!!!!!!!!!! Honestly I lean more towards Thatch as the prince!!! He’s not… good at politics, because he’s too honest and truthful, but like..He’s been raised for this, and he knows how to twist people round his finger. They think his optimism is idiocy and someone scatterbrained? He’ll give them scatterbrained, and sneak what he wants right by them. Most of the servants know his particular brand of intelligence, but they keep it to themselves because he’s a good prince, and for all that he can manipulate with the best of them, he really only does it in the interest of others???????????? And Izo, now Izo, you’d think he’d be a bad knight, and you’re right in part of the aspect - he’s not the best sword fighter, or horse-rider, or the best guard, and he can get distracted by people and things and situations, but like, gods above does this man know how to get information. And it’s weird!! It’s weird, because Izo understands people but not in the way Thatch does. He understands guilt and greed and secrecy and bribery and what people will do for others, what he doesn’t understand is- is the things that thatch is proficient in. Like, Izo gets it when people act in a situation he knows. But when they change it? When they don’t act like he expects? He has to find out why. And if there’s no reason bar human fallacy he’s just??????????????? It confuses him so much. He knows what paths will lead to the best outcome and people!! not following that!! what the heck!!! why!!! ???? and thatch is like uhhhhhhhh because they’re unpredicatble and people are weird???

“IT DOESN’T MAKE SENSE“

who’s the teacher and who’s the single parent

Thatch is the teacher and Izo’s the single parent!! Like I said?? before?? Izo’s not like…amazing with people, he tries, but he always…thinks his way is best?? And doesn’t understand why people don’t do the most efficient thing? That’s hard for him. But Thatch, oh thatch, he’s good-natured and a bit dorky and useless, but he can solve a person faster than Ace can burn down a building. He started off not really getting kids, because, well!!! Kids!! They’re loud and shrieky and their sense of place and self and Science is weird but thatch stopped looking at them like some other species and was like No they’re just Little People. Anyway, he’s basically everyone’s favourite teacher.  

who’s the writer and who’s the editor

Thatch is the writer and Izo is the editor. And like, I can definitely see Thatch as an editor, too, but like?? For structure and flow and being creative and pulling more from a work, and Izo gets really stubborn about it because he’s like no, what you’re suggesting is grammatically incorrect but then Thatch is like yes but it feels. That’s their dynamic even if it’s switched, too pfft. Thatch would write cookbooks but like!! The dorky ones w/ cute stories and pictures and stuff like that. He’d also probably write ??? Poems, I feel?? Whereas Izo would write nonfiction and fantasy, but fantasy ala a quiet, understated fantasy that seeps into every book, and like, you’re not sure you’re meant to understand the book and it’s a weird philosophical classic and you’re just squinting like…uh…okay. Also the one time he and Thatch collaborate they make a jokingly cheesy messy ridiculously out there romance book and it becomes the most popular out of any of their books and they get SO MAD.

[seventeen-scenarios-blog]

[SCENARIO] How the Performance Team will Propose (MH/DN)

AND WE’RE DONE WITH THE PROPOSAL SCENARIOS! Thank you so much for supporting this mini scenario series. It was definitely enjoyable to imagine how these scenes would play out, and we hope you guys would love it too! We’re not currently accepting any more scenario requests, so be sure to look out for the reopening of our request box if you would like to see a new scenario series!

A/N: That wraps up the Performance Team! Hope you guys enjoyed this <3 Pepo Team’s Maknae line always makes me so soft ugh I wanna squish them forever.

-wooed<3 -scooped✌️

SYNOPSIS

Okay, so they may not be the most romantic or flamboyant, but know this: though unconventional, the boys can be pretty darn sincere and so so so sweet with their proposals your teeth will get cavities. Who needs epic and grand proposals? They want the special moment to be for you and ONLY FOR YOU.

MINGHAO

The Shyest but the sweetest kid ever

SKINSHIP TO HIM IS A BIG THING

So he’s really shy at initiating

But when he DOES, YOUR HEART MELTS INTO A FLOP

As a boyfriend, he is always the considerate and understanding

From helping you queue for your favourite oppa’s merchandise

To surprising you with your favourite food when u tell him you’re hungry at 2am

HE’S JUST THE BEST OKAY WHO WOULDN’T WANT HIM AS A BOYFRIEND

Will definitely prepare many many many MANY things just for the proposal

Probably already has approval from his parents

Invites you over for a casual date in his home

Buys flowers and everything romantic WHEE

Prepares like dimsum for a nice meal before the big event

NOT FORGETTING BUYING YOU A SUPER CUTE DRESS THAT YOU’VE BEEN EYEING THE PAST MONTH

WILL GIFT YOU THE prized family possession

Okay abit cliche but you know the part where he just takes out the gold-ish jade-ish bracelet and he goes

“This used to by my mum’s”

/takes your hands

/looks into your eyes

/puts on the bracelet for you

“Now its yours”

Both of you just pause there for a moment, enjoying each other’s silence and loving gaze

You’re just staring at him like he’s the most precious thing in the world

“Will you marry me? Y/N?”

And internally you’re just frozen, like you’re so so SOOOO Happy and delighted

This shy boy, making a proposal, in front of you, in his apartment

Your pause made him feel uncertain and he just looks somewhere else like ANYWHERE but your eyes because he’s 1. Nervous and 2. Super shy and slightly embarassed and 3. AFRAID OF YOUR REJECTION (But ofc he is very sure of the relationship that the both of you are in)

THEN AGAIN how could you reject someone so precious like Minghao

As soon as you nod your head, he just LETS GO OF HIS EMOTIONS like you can see all his stress fade away from the relief on his face and he’ll pull you in for a long, tight hug

At some point you’ll feel his tears trickle down your neckline as he leans the side of his face on your ear during the hug

AND YES DUH YOU’LL BE CRYING TOO

Both of you will be a crying mess just laughing at each other

“Why you crying pabo”

“But you’re crying too”

Just in total bliss the both of you would be

Ah love <3

CHAN

I’d like to imagine that Chan would love to date someone that loves dance as much as he does

Like, you don’t need to be a professional dancer or anything, but he gets so soft every time he sees the sparkle in your eyes whenever you watch someone dance, your passion, your awe, your sheer appreciation for that art

He prefers if it was him you were watching, though

You both do this thing where he would play soft music in your home, the empty practice room, anywhere private really, and you would just hold hands and feel the music, swaying happily in each other’s arms

YOU KNOW THERE’S THIS SCENE IN STEVEN UNIVERSE WHERE (*ahem* spoiler) RUBY AND SAPPHIRE DANCE IN THE FOREST AND THEY FALL IN LOVE WHILE HUMMING TO MUSIC AND THEY END UP FUSING INTO GARNET aljfdlskjfdadf it was so beautiful

You both watch that show and you both love that scene so so so so much

He even tries to call you ‘my Sapphire’ for a nickname once but you both ended up getting teased by the boys (he still saves it as your contact name, tho)

And his name on your contacts has a little red ruby emoji next to it 🔴

So anyway, back to the proposal

I doubt Chan would be exactly willing have a GRAND, ROMANTIC proposal that involves all the preparations and all that stuffs

And he wouldn’t tell the boys when he’s planning to propose

Because he really doesn’t want them to freak out or become super overbearing or anything like that

Also because he wants this moment to be special just for you and only the both of you

It’ll just be like any other day, you both will be taking a relaxing walk through the gardens

Kids are already home for dinner now so it’s pretty deserted, but oh so romantic with flowers readily blooming at the peak of spring

Maybe he’d be having a bad day at practice, so you’d bring him out to relax and unwind after work

And he feels so lucky that you’re always looking out for him and taking care of him

Hand in hand you’d bring him to a small but prettily lit pavilion

“It’s really nice here, isn’t it?” you tell him.

“Would you like to dance with me?”

And he does, slipping your hands into his you both waltz to a slow, melodious song, his body behind yours, his chin on your shoulder

You can feel the timbre of his voice when he lightly hums to the song, and it makes you so soft and it takes all you could to not melt in his arms

He’d start planting little butterfly kisses down your neck and you laugh in protest because it tickles.

And your laugh is just melodious to his ears. He wants nothing more than to be able to wake up to this every morning.

So he tightens his hold on you and sighs ever so blissfully, “God, I want to spend the rest of my life with you.”

You chuckle again, “You flatter me, Chan.” But the look in his eyes were dead serious and so full of emotion. “I mean it, I want to be with you forever.”

And he gets down on one knee.

“I know I don’t really have everything prepared… I’m not the most well-endowed, nor am I the most talented, but I’ll try my damnedest best to make you the happiest girl on Earth, so please...

“Will you be my dance partner for the rest of my life?”

Your only response is gleefully throwing your arms around his neck, and he happily lifts you off your feet and swings you around the pavilion, planting sweet kisses along your jawline (like how Ruby does alsjflkjfsaf) as you both celebrate.

[sdmn-edits]

ChrisMD Imagine: First Date Nerves

Summary: Y/N and Chris met a few weeks ago at Upload and you arranged your first date. Chris is soo nervous that he almost forgets to turn up. He’s staying over at the Sidemen house and Simon has to remind him. Chris and Y/N have a great meal - even though they both are very nervous.

Warnings: just pure cuteness.. I think that’s it?

Requested: Yep by a lovely anon:  I don't know if you take requests right now or not but I love your writing and I was wondering if maybe you could write an imagine of like your first date with Chris and he's all nervous and cute and it just being fluffy and adorable? Thank you! Have a nice day!

Rating: any age lol

A/N: Hey, I’m really sorry to anon for the lateness of this imagine - I’ve been quite held up. I think I’m turning into a Chris blog - with how many imagines I’ve done for him lol. Yes, I know Upload was ages ago - I couldn’t think of anywhere else he could have met Y/N so... and I made Y/N a YouTuber as well... I’ve also never been on a date before so plz don’t kill me if this isn’t like a date. Anyways I hope you enjoy <3 (this is probably my longest imagine I’ve ever written so..)

~Beth <3

———————————————————–

~A few weeks earlier...~

/-/-/ Your P.O.V /-/-/

Being a YouTuber yourself and being best friends with one of the owners of Upload, you had access to the VIP room - where you met him. He was busy showing off his football skills with Simon (Miniminter), your best friend, when you first set your eyes on him. Every couple of around the worlds or so, he glanced in your direction and smirked. After he finished playing with Simon, you approached Simon to speak to him.

“Hey Y/N, this is Chris, or ChrisMD on YouTube - you’ve seen us collab a couple of times haven’t you?” Simon asked. You nodded.

“Hi Y/N, what a pretty name. I see you were checking out my amazing football skills earlier. Simon was saying that you have an awesome channel, what kind of videos do you do?” Chris said. As he said this, you could feel the heat coming from your cheeks.

“Well, for starters I wasn’t checking you out. I was actually thinking how bad you were. And secondly, I just make gaming videos and a few in real life videos but that’s really about it.” You laughed.

For the rest of the weekend, you and Chris hung out. Talking like you’ve known each other for years. The weekend flew by. As both you  were packing up on the last day, getting your bag and thanking the Sidemen for organising, you felt a tap on your shoulder. You turned around to see your, now, new best friend, Chris. “Hey, need some help Y/N?” Chris asked.

“Hey, Chris, I’m fine don’t worry.” You reply. You started walking out of the VIP room when all of a sudden you hear: “Hey uh Y/N, wait.” You turn around to see Chris running towards you. He stopped in front of you. His hands ran through his golden hair. “Y/N I have to ask you something.” He said as he was breathing heavily. “Y/N, will you go on a date with me? I’m staying in London for the next couple of weeks anyways to record some videos, so travel isn’t an issue.” he said.

“Yes, of course Chris.” You smile. 

~Present day...~

Today was the day you and Chris are having dinner and it would be a lie if you said you weren’t nervous. You were nervous! If there was a scale of 1-10 to describe how nervous you were, 1000 would be how nervous you were. Especially because Chris picked the place. You reached over to your phone, seeing if there was any messages from Chris. There wasn’t. Oh well, he’s probably still asleep, you thought. You locked your phone and you went into the bathroom to have a shower.

/-/-/ Chris’ P.O.V /-/-/

You woke up to the sound of shouting outside your “bedroom” you walk over to the door and opened it to see JJ and Simon.

“YOUR REMINDING HIM!” you hear Simon shout. 

“NO! HE’S CLOSER TO YOUR BEDROOM PLUS YOUR BEST FRIENDS WITH Y/N!” JJ shouts back.

“Hey guys, sorry to interrupt you but I am trying to sleep here.” you said.

“CHRIS, SIMON HAS SOMETHING TO SAY TO YOU!” Simon glared at him. “Aren’t you forgetting something Chris?!” he asks, his voice a bit louder than usual, kind of mocking you thought. “What could I possibly forget?” you asked. You hear Simon and JJ groan. “Chris are you serious?” JJ asked, looking angry. “What?! I’m confused guys?!” You say. Simon sighs. “Mate, your going on a freaking date with Y/N in what” he looks at his watch “an hour!” he said. “Wait, what?!” You quickly run back into your “room”. “Simon can I borrow a shirt?!” you shout. 

“There’s two in the wardrobe, help yourself, they might be a bit big though.” he shouts back. “That’s the least of my worries” you shout back as you were jumping around, getting your trousers around your waist. You quickly ran into the bathroom to put deodorant on and you ran back into the room to put on the closest shirt: a white shirt, with a black collar. You put it on as well as your suit jacket, the shirt was too big but you didn’t care. You quickly brushed your teeth and put aftershave on. You quickly put on your shoes and grabbed your phone opened it to see the time (20 minutes until the date), grabbed your wallet and stuck it in your pocket. You shouted goodbye to everyone then you remembered, how were you meant to get there. “Simon, could you give us a lift?” you shout. You heard a loud groan.

“Keys are on the kitchen side.” he shouted back.

“I owe you one mate, cheers” you shout back as you ran to the kitchen. You picked the keys up and ran to the garage. You unlocked Simon’s car and opened the drivers door. You quickly adjusted the seat, put the seat belt on and drove off. 

/-/-/ Your P.O.V /-/-/

You looked at your phone, seeing the time, Chris was ten minutes late. He’s probably in traffic you thought. You still were nervous, maybe even more than before. All of a sudden you hear a “Ahem, is this seat taken beautiful?” you looked up to see a very nervous looking Chris. “CHRIS?!” you stand up hugging him. “You look very pretty!” he said quietly in the hug. “Shall we eat?” he asked letting go of you. 

For the rest of the evening, you talked and talked and talked about whatever came into your heads. Every so often, he would give you the same look, he gave you when you first met. As you both we’re stuffed, Chris ordered the bill and payed for it. You both walked out of the restaurant, hand in hand. It was quite cold outside. Chris noticed your hand shivering and your body shaking with coldness. He stopped in his tracks and took his jacket and handing it to you. “Here” he said planting it on your shoulders. 

As you both walked to your car, you turned around and said: “I’ve had an amazing time tonight, we should do this another time” you placed a kiss on his cheek. “I have too.” you were about to open your car door when a strong hand grabbed your arm. He pulled you into to his lips. His warm lips molded to yours. You melted in the spot, you didn’t want it to end. Unfortunately, you both stopped to catch your breaths. “I think I’m in love with you Y/N. Come back with me to Jersey. Be my girlfriend” he said, holding your hand. “Yes I will Chris!” you exclaim. You hugged him. “I love you.” you mumbled into his chest.

“I love you too Y/N.” he said as he kissed the top of your head.

/-/-/ Final Note From Me /-/-/

Hi, sorry this is soooo cringy and it’s taken me awhile to come up with an idea. Ethan’s imagine will be out sometime next week. I will update my masterlist soon. Thank you so much for everything guys! I love each and every single one of you.

~Beth <3

[civilcoconstruction]

Kylee’s Home Buying Story – The Inspired Room

Hiiii! Melissa’s daughter Kylee here

It’s been awhile since I’ve written a blog post! I know my mom has shared here that I am moving so I thought I would come share some of the story and journey so far. If you follow me or my mom on Instagram, you may have seen that we’ve been sharing some behind the scenes of my moving process and taking you all on tours of the homes we’ve been seeing. We’ve saved those stories to highlights on each of our profiles if you need to catch up! >> (@kynoelle, @theinspiredroom, @courtneylane1).

Going back a little bit, you may remember I’ve shared here a few times over the years about my townhome in Seattle (our entry pictured above and one of my pups, Leo!). It was the first home my husband and I ever owned and it has served us so well over the last 7 years as we settled into our careers and life after college. 

Our townhouse kitchen, pretty much as it was since we moved in. It never really inspired me. It was nice for what it was and I loved how spacious it was, just not my vibe.

At the end of 2019, we actually started plans for some updates around the townhouse. On the agenda: paint the wood kitchen cabinets, replace the black granite countertop tiles for something more light and bright, replace lights, and do a fun fireplace tile makeover!

Here was my very poorly photoshopped kitchen mockup

So that was the plan, but then…pandemic! We halted our plans since we weren’t having any people or contractors coming over. Like everyone else, we hunkered down at home to wait it out.

The townhouse living room.

During those first few months at home, our plans and dreams started to shift. I already worked from home and remote work became a permanent option for my husband. And so, we decided instead of investing into the townhouse, we were ready to move on to our next chapter.

If you want to see more of the townhouse, I did a little spring house tour video right before we moved out! Click here to watch it!

We started looking for homes last summer and put in several offers, all of which we were outbid on (but we were always *so* close). Pictured above is one we almost got! In fact it was the first one we put an offer on. After losing out several times, we realized we would be much better off selling our home first to be able to make more competitive offers.

Our new temporary space at my mom’s house! So far my plants have managed to stay alive in the move!

In April we sold the townhouse and moved into my parents’ basement apartment as a temporary landing place while we searched for our new home! Little did we know that the housing market would get even more wild than it had been when we started looking last year. We thought that with equity from our townhome we’d be able to swoop in and maybe even get our dream house, only to quickly discover that it was not going to be easy.

Homes we would fall in love with were receiving 20 offers, all cash, almost always a waived inspection or appraisal, sometimes going for over $300,000 over the listing price. Yes, you read that right–$300,000 OVER! We recently looked back to see how much the homes we have been interested in the past couple months have gone for and almost every one was at least $150,000 over list price. The Washington housing market is always competitive and expensive, but this has been next level. It made it nearly impossible to get any of the homes that we were interested in. I know so many of you have reached out sharing it’s the same where you live, so I know there are many in this same boat around the country!

We made offers on all different styles of homes in different cities and settings. A couple were in the suburbs, one near a lake (and would have been close to where Courtney is living now, which would have been so fun!). Another was out in farm country, and another one was in the forest. We looked at homes on the islands and the city. It has been an emotional roller coaster to imagine life in so many places!

Honestly, we rarely found homes we even were interested in, but when we found them it was rough to be outbid every time. We tried to remain patient and not get caught up in any frenzies that would put us in over our head or in any regrettable situation. 

We were looking largely in Washington, but were open to the possibility of living almost anywhere in the pacific northwest, all the way down to Portland, Oregon (where we grew up!). While we could have really moved anywhere in the country, the PNW has our heart.

I can’t imagine living anywhere else! The lush green trees, the outdoor activities, the mild climate, the gorgeous summers, the beautiful fall season, the chill people, the hygge vibes…and even the rain (which honestly it doesn’t rain as much as you may have heard!).

Portland, OR

A couple of weeks ago we went to an open house while visiting some family in Portland and fell in love with it! Finally, a year after we started the process, much to our surprise, we got an offer accepted. We are a little shocked (is this real life?!), excited, and nervous all wrapped into one. It’s a little bittersweet to be putting more distance between me and my parents’ and siblings, but we will remain close enough to still see each other frequently. We are even considering the trips to one another as a fun opportunity to spend time in each of our 3 cities, all of which we love so much! Kind of like having vacation homes :).

And we certainly aren’t heading to anywhere where we will be lonely in between visits, we have so many friends and family (including Lance’s mom!) who still live there. We actually have more friends and family there than we have here, so in many ways it truly feels like home in a way Washington never has.

Soooo, I’m sure you’re wanting to see the house and I can’t wait to be able to share it with you! What I can tell you now is that we are IN LOVE with it. Since the housing market was so wild, we honestly didn’t know what style or condition the house we got would be in, so we feel so grateful to have gotten something that has so many qualities we wanted. It’s super cute already, but has so much room for us to make it our own! I’ll take you on the tour and share our plans very soon.

Stay tuned here and on Instagram (follow @kynoelle and @theinspiredroom) for updates, and if you’re a blog subscriber you may be the first one to see a sneak peek of the house

Source link

from CIVICLO Construction & Interior https://civilco.construction/kylees-home-buying-story-the-inspired-room/

[chelsiealvin-blog]

The Overall Wedding Planning Process

I am a planner. Obviously if you have read any of my other articles, I LIVE to plan. Planning my own wedding was going to be just as fun right? Just a month after getting engaged and with the declining health of my Grandfather we decided to get married in one year in June 2016. We started by researching florists, day of coordinators and bakeries; the stress of planning really set in. Within a month, with a little luck, we found this incredible company called John Michael Event Services. I knew that I wanted to be involved with the personal things like our cake topper and guest book; but I realized I  REALLY needed help with the everything else.

We had a strict budget of 13K for our wedding, so we went in with low hopes that they could assist us. To our surprise, they offered us a customized event planning bundle at 10K to include a custom cake, wedding planner, day of coordinator, custom floral, catering and drinks. We were lucky enough to have friends do our DJ and photography services for free. We signed the paperwork that day and we immediately felt relieved. The wedding planner planned every single appointment for us; we would just show up and pick out what we wanted. They even spaced out payments for our wedding throughout the year to make it even easier on us.

  Before we get started on this nonsense of weddings. Take away this one piece of advice.

The VERY FIRST THING you need to pick up is large 10 gallon Tupperware bins. The bins saved my life. Put these somewhere you can easily reach them and as items come in the mail for your wedding, pop them into the bins. This way everything is packed for your planner or wedding party to put out on your wedding day. Even use these bins to store ALL of your paperwork. TRUST ME.

The Venue – 1 Year Away from our Wedding Day!

After booking our Wedding Planner/Coordinator, one year out we needed to pick our venue. We looked at only one venue; we knew when we walked through the door. Lake Mary Events Center in Lake Mary, Florida is an incredible venue. It featured a beautiful rotunda with high glass windows overlooking Lake Mary. It took our breaths away from the moment we walked into the building. Our ceremony was to be held in the beautiful rotunda just after sunrise, our reception in their grand ballroom.

Food, Flowers, Music, Cake and THE DRESS! – Eight months away from our Wedding Day!

A few months after booking our venue, our wedding planner scheduled us a meeting to pick out our flowers, food and cake. We also met with our DJ to pick out different songs to play during the event. OH and I bought my dress! You always want to get your dress with as MUCH time as possible, with all of the stress my weight fluctuated a lot and I need alterations to my dress.

Flowers – I went with lambs ear and light colored peonies. I really wanted to stick to lighter colors, to go with the morning/breakfast vibe.

The Dress – I didn’t actually have a plan for what I wanted my dress to look like. My Man of Honor actually picked out my dress, forced me into and I fell in love with it. He picked out a beautiful ball gown layered with tulle.

Music – was pretty easy too. My husband to be and I turned on music in our living room and wrote down each song we wanted for the different parts of the event. We sent the list over to our DJ and POOF that was checked off our list.

The very best part? Picking out the food! Andrew and I wanted a brunch wedding, so we decided on a Make Your Own Waffle Bar, unlimited bacon and unlimited mimosas. CAN’T GO WRONG WITH THAT! (plus breakfast food is a LOT cheaper than serving dinner)

The cake – We still wanted to keep with our brunch vibe here. We picked out a citrus, orange flavored cake with cream cheese frosting. YUM.

It’s all in the details – Four months away from out Wedding Day!

Some of the smaller things I of course wanted to do myself. We included a custom wedding hashtag #herecomethealvins and printed it on mostly everything we made, this way all photos that our guests posted we were able to see later on! The small details do not have to be expensive either, we mostly used the Dollar Tree and Oriental Trading Company. I ordered everything online, had it delivered to my door, packed it away in our large Tupperware bins for our wedding planner and POOF it was done.

A photo booth – Our photographer snapped soooo many cute photos of our guests! Get creative with it! We picked out a Flamingo Themed booth! I purchased the photo booth props from Esty as a PDF ($10) and printed them at Staples for another $5. We included some dollar tree items as well, a feather boa and inflatable bird.

A guest book – This doesn’t have to be a traditional book, we ended up using our favorite board game! We got it on sale for about $30 and picked up two sharpies for guests to sign.

Cake topper – We had custom bride and groom flamingos made for the top of our cake. This was the MOST expensive thing we purchased. We picked them up off Etsy for $30.

Guest favors – Something small (and cheap) we hand folded paper boxes, filled with colorful tissue paper and placed a small gold animal. The small gold animals matched the larger version in the reception as “table numbers.” A guest favor/place card! The cardboard boxes came from the dollar tree ($50), tulle from Michael’s ($15) and plastic animals from the dollar tree ($25).

A unity ceremony of some sort – We used a Tree Planting Ceremony for ours. Each guest was invited to place dirt in the pot so show their support as we planted the tree to show the foundation and strength of our relationship. We brought a pot and watering can from home and picked up the plant from IKEA.

Signage – We had plenty of different signs throughout our wedding. A welcome sign, photo booth entrance, small table signs. These are easy to purchase! We bought everything from Etsy for around $50.

Small treats – A LOT of people are using a candy bar in their weddings, but we wanted something brunch themed! We purchased the same containers as a candy bar, but filled them with fun cereal. We folded small pink popcorn containers with our hashtag sticker on the front, so guests were able to make their perfect mix.

I had custom newspapers printed! Around $100 for 100 copies, we had a company print a custom wedding newspaper printed. Each small article was about someone in our wedding party, funny stories about how we met and tons of pictures of our pup. There was even a word search on the back and we passed out Starbucks gift cards for winners!

Menus – During the reception I printed out menus on card stock (costing around $15 at Staples) and created a word search on the back. We also had custom pencils made with our hashtag (you can get these from Oriental Trading Company for $15).

All of the other events that come with Weddings – One month before our Wedding Day!

I was actually shocked to know that it’s just not your wedding day you are planning for. There are so many more smaller events that take place to celebrate for upcoming marriage. A month before our wedding I had a bacholrette party with friends, a bridal shower with family, an engagement party, a rehearsal event and I planned a bridal party slumber party the night before my wedding

(I will be posting all of these events separately later on).

Weddings are EXHAUSTING.

Take your time and enjoy all of the wedding festivities. OH! And take lots of photos!

Our wedding planner was INCREDIBLE; she was there with us the entire process of planning and the stress the day of. Even if you think you will not need a planner, please consider it! Even with my passion of planning events, I needed her more than I could imagine on my big day! We were surprised how much we actually NEEDED a planner.

There are two large things that I have gathered from my own wedding and for those weddings I have helped out at throughout the years.

First, delegate but delegate selectively! Rely on your bridal party and your family to come through for you, but make sure you are demanding on what you actually WANT. A lot of family remembers have their own ideas and values for what a wedding should be/have, it’s your wedding; do not let anyone (including family) push you into anything that will not make you happy.

Second, it’s all about the details. You can have a beautiful venue and you can have a perfect dress; but it is all about the tiny details that make your wedding special. Things like a special cake topper and guest favors make ALL the difference when it comes to making your day special. These small details do not have to be expensive (you know how much I love the Dollar Tree), but they have to be personal for you and your spouse.

Smaller things that no one ever tells you that will change your day

Pack spare clothes in your “getaway car” do not let anyone move them

Pack valet money in your “getaway bag” you do not want to have to park in a parking garage at a hotel and have to carry your dress and your belongings five miles to the lobby. You are tired and you deserve it

Go to David’s Bridal and get your dress there. You will get your dream dress for cheap, along with a PACKAGE OF COUPONS for discounted tux rentals and spa treatments for your ladies

Do not spend money on a nice wedding band for your husband, you will eventually have to get it replaced….several times

Use a poster board and sticky notes to map out your reception guest seating (they are easier to move around)

On your wedding night (after parking in valet) go into the hotel lobby in your dress – you will immediately be upgraded to a fancy room with free drinks

Brides listen. You will miss out on your guests arriving and your bridal party walking down the aisle. You are going to want to have someone film this for you

Drive to the Courthouse 60 days before your wedding to pick up your license and take the pre-marriage consoling; it will save you $30

Make sure you officiant fills out the form correctly or you will have to get it re-signed. You can send this in the mail, instead of having to worry about dropping it off on your Honeymoon

Do not screw around with your birth control. Let it do what it needs to do. Do not change your routine weeks before and have your period on your wedding night!

Take two honeymoons. You and your hubby are two different people; plan a week for each of you. (We stayed in a cabin and hiked for my honeymoon; we went on a beach cruise for his). You are exhausted from all of the festivties, you DESRVE to take some time off.

Use VISTA PRINT for everything wedding related. Wedding invites, announcements, thank you cards, even the hashtag stickers. Having everything printed through them was cheaper, they shipped everything right to my door.

I know this is all over whelming. Trust me though, keep this list!

Remember though, it’s your day. It’s all about you and your spouse. Spend the day with each other and enjoy every single moment! I would love to hear about your wedding below!! 

  Weddings are stressful, beautiful, WONDERFUL and a whole LOT of work. The Overall Wedding Planning Process I am a planner. Obviously if you have read any of my other articles, I LIVE to plan.

[b-blushes]

oh yeah hahaha i talked about what i'd like to do in the tags of the first post let me copy + paste them here for anyone interested :P

i found a big trough down in some overgrown farm buildings a while ago (it is ours) and my friend just helped me clear a patch of my flowerbed yesterday.....

so what if i put BIG TROUGH IN FLOWERBED and then i a) GET POND and b) reduce plant surface area that i need to (and cannot) maintain, in a way that adds a feature i've been pining for for like a year!!!! fingers crossed.......!

i am imagining it soooo cute planted all around as well... like i could put in another broom plant to be high and flowers next to it, some little low plants around the base... more creeping thyme my friend creeping thyme as ground cover!!! i could put the slabs back down to reinstate a 'path' (aka place i can perch to pull weeds so i'm not Mud™) AND put in place the little bench i got as a gift like... last year? that i've still not found a place for! it could be peace and love on planet earth!!!

that's the plan! :') <3

OH YEAH I just remembered that hours into not being able to sleep last night i finally potentially SOLVED MY POND WANT in a way that i can actually do!!!!!! >:) which would require spending NO money except on a water lily....... gonna ask my parents about it later if i can heeheehoohoo >:)