#i am finally on summer break !!
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(ID in alt) hi sorry for back to back marvel fanart I swear I still have dc stuff lmao. However I did recently read X-Men: first class and got a bit carried away doodling this after Lmao
#marvel comics#x men#scott summers#jean grey#hank mccoy#bobby drake#warren worthington iii#charles xavier#anyway#picked X-Men: First Class#out of sheer curiosity and desire to know more about the X-Men and I really enjoyed it!#Idk how in line with canon it but. Whatever tbh. Anyway that was the inspo behind this#just the og 5 fooling around and being silly teens#jean being the flirty one probably isn't very in character at this time period (jean doesnt really show any interest in scott in first clas#but it was too cute to pass up#also charles looks so much more pissed off than i intended 😭 there's this one issue of first class where he's just BERATING the xmen#just yelling at them psychically and eventually its revealed that it wasn't actually Charles but i didn't question it at first#which is kind of mean to charles. but idk i haven't gotten far with the x-men (im being very casual in my reading rn)#so maybe he deserves it#also i keep making bigger and bigger drawings bc i know that those print well#but i keeo forgetting that tumblr murders the quality of the image when you upload it. bwahhh#anyway i think i am finally going to knuckle down and open commission slots for part of july#idk how much a bad boy like this (lined coloured and shaded w/ multiple characters) would cost but we're gonna figure that out#honestly i might slightly under price them just to encourage ppl to spring for them#okay that's all for now I PROMISE I HAVE DC DRAWINGS TO SHARE i was just in a serious drawing funk and drawing some characters-#-that I'd never drawn before (like shulkie and now the xmen) helped break that funk!#mine
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trying not to get a speeding ticket
#art#my art#fanart#chainsawman#chainsaw man#csm#denji hayakawa#denji#asa mitaka#chainsaw man part 2#csm part 2#chainsaw man part 2 fanart#it took me a while to finish this but am proud with the result :)#its summer break soon so i should be able to finally post more :))))
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also lest I do naught but grumble, blessings roll call! share blessings or news or prayer requests in the tags :)
#ladies it has sure been a Month#finished the semester by the skin of my teeth and was blessed to be able to do finals without dying or having a complete mental breakdown#have been resting? and doing crafts and reading so so much? WHO DO I THINK I AM???#anyway on the whole it was an intense month but one where God has definitely been with me#blessings!#break from school#time with friends#sister's high school graduation (insanely proud of herrrr)#flowers!#good books#forgiveness even when I keep messing up#camp coming up in two weeks (aaaaa)#baking and house projects and generally actually having time for hobbies#please pray for wisdom to lead well as a camp counselor#and time management to juggle the things coming up in the rest of this summer#also the ability to flee temptation#anyway please do jump in! I wanna hear what's up with y'all!#blessings
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........creachure
#cats#his eyes are always so big and weird he no longer looks like a cat anymore sometimes.. in a way...#it's hard to understand.. complicated vibes on this boy#his summer sprawl (laying flopped out on the floor weird because of the heat)#I AM still trying to get some costumes done and also post another poll advtnure so I can finally finish it lol#the weather this month has just been soooo.... There was the heat wave and then after like 2 days of coolenss where I was like 'ah! finally#I can be productiv!' but just as soon as I had recovered from the heat.. it got hot again ghhhh#currently sweating inside. I actually had to leave my doctors appointment early today because I was just so so warm from#sitting in the car and the fac tthat half the buildings still do not have their air up very high and etc. and I felt so nausous#and flushed and started to get back and stomach pains for some reason.. Which I guess is good in a way to further confirm to doctors that#I Have Something Wrong With Me lol (most normal people should not be this heat sensitive I think) but is also still a little stinky#because I still payed a copay for the fulla appointment time but cit it short by leaving 15minues early.. grrr#ANYWAY. It seems like recently it's just hot all the time but it will ocasionally tempt you with a cool day of reprieve BUT don't let your#guard down! because as soon as you start to think 'hey things are getting better! :0' the sun will be like NO actualy. scalding temperature#be upon ye..#Which of COURSE. I would rather have hot weather with little breaks in between than just constant hot weather. 100% definitely.#but it just always makes me sad because I get my hopes up lol.. JUST as I've recovered from the past heat and am So Ready To Start#On All My Things now That I'm Not As Sick And Hey Maybe It's Even Cool Enough To Do A Costume! .. my hopes are dashed#.. woe and so on and so forth. . Which I am stil managing to get a few things done but just.. not the things I really WANT to do (costumes.#sculptures. edit videos. etc. ).#anyway.. look at son.. If nothing else I still have lots of cat photos.. my sole productivity offerings to the internet online world
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finals week has been so evil but at least they made. persona 3 reload affordable for girls (me)
#squishy talks too much#I AM FINALLY GONNA PLAY it#over summer break#bc it's on steam sale#i am also gonna get sdv which is also on sale#mean blonde girl. let's kiss
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First and only episode of Dangerous Romance I'll get to watch while it airs is a go. I am so excited. This is absolutely my most anticipated show of the year from GMMTV and I am thrilled. Give me my spoiled boy with no goal and no pressure who's falling apart because he has nothing to work towards and my poor boy who's doing everything he can to be the best he can with nothing to work with but his brains and his body and I am gonna lose my shit.
#dangerous romance#drts#thai bl#thai drama#bl drama#bl series#thai series#thaibl#asianlgbtqdramas#asian lgbtq dramas#thai bl series#thai bl drama#gmmtv series#gmmtv#gmmtv bl#gmmtv drama#i am so excited#my only time watching this show live and not after work#last weekday of summer break#my final gift
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So what do you do when your favourite rapper makes a catchy song about the hardships of life that you want to love but upon release can’t connect with at all and after a few listens almost outright dislike because none of the pain and hardship life has put you through has ever made you a better person or given you the energy/motivation to do better and it actually just did the complete opposite and you’ve lost out on precious years of your life and so many opportunities while trying to process the trauma and undo the damage
But everyone else seems to love the song to the point that you start to wonder if maybe you’re just a fucking idiot for not being able to make something good out of said trauma and hardship instead of just being filled with crippling anxiety and depression and bitterness and grief and rage
#käärijä#yes this is about ruoska#the mental health tanked again this week#sorry to put my ramblings in the main tag but I need someone to tell me I’m not insane for being so uncomfortable with the song#I’ve been nervous to say my full thoughts because people loved it so much and I didn’t want to rain on their parade#and the umk performance and mv were genuinely well done#but it just really hurts#if the metaphorical whip that hurt me was a tangible item I’d fucking shred the thing to pieces#and then burn the remains#so that no one else could ever suffer the same way again#it didn’t push me through life#it made me want to give up on it completely#I’ve been at my happiest and most driven and most fulfilled when I finally got a fucking break from it#one of the opening lines about sitting at the gas station actually triggered a really fucking bad memory I would have loved to forget#it fucking sucks because his songs have brought me so much happiness#a kind I haven’t felt in a long time#and then there’s….this#if nothing else I wanted to love it for Erika’s sake#but I just can’t#am I just misinterpreting the lyrics?#or projecting too much#I probably am#because god I am NOT looking forward to hearing it all though Kä summer camp#and i hate that
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Send me good wishes yall. I'm going to try and work on some late work when I get home but I'm chronically bad at doing that without an energy drink but I'm not ready for the impending doom of selling my soul to energy drinks so I can function
Uuhhhhhhhhh I accidentally went on a tangent and there's a whole vent in the tags oopsies
#i already get an energy drink every time on my lunch break at work. but thats partly cause im not too fond of my current job anyways#i dont need perfect grades just. as long as theyre passing i dont care#and are still passing grades after whatverr the finals do to it#im going to a trade school anyways gpa doesnt matter. ive just. QUITE LITERALLY. spent my whole life smacking my head into a desk-#-cause of school. and im so desperate to get my ass outta here. It'll be so much easier cause i will be free from family too#once i get my own place that is. I honest to God would rather sell my soul to two jobs and come home to peace and breathe#than this hell now. being at school is tourment and being at home is tourment. cant wait till im actually HOME. and not some. house.#home is where the dodge challenger that i will sleep in is. home is where the heart is. and my heart isnt anywhere here.#just. one more year. i can get my license at my brithday which is all the way in decemeber but. one more year from now#and I can scrape by and graduate and say adios.#i refuse to acknowledge the scenerio of not making it cause. fuck it we ball or something. am i using that saying right#i already did my time in prison(summer school)#i dont know about yall but summer school was honestly one of the WORST expereinces ive ever been in. horrible.
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they. weren't lying when they said imagining your f/o (being proud of you or something like that) while doing something you've been putting off would make you able to do it,
#caw caw#i had a lot of clothes piling up and most of it was for spring + summer#and i finally managed to put a good majority of it away; and at the same time i was imagining longan being here with me#maybe they could help me fold them or put them in the designated drawers..........................#i still have today's laundry to do but i am So Tired#i think i deserve to have a little snuggle break with longan <3
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anyway im normal and i cant wait until miriam hacksaw releases her album bc her voice is heavenly and i finally figured out how to download audio from instagram videos to add to my local files so i can play it on loop yippeeee
#also shout out to finally getting around to listeninf to long sought rest and i JUST realized the accordian player / vocalist is small void#which kicked me into gear of finally listening to small voids music outside of clips of their live performances and nearly breaking down#cryinf cause jesus christ#anyway lsr isnt making music anymore BUT there was at leasy one album released from some of their members in collaboration with riley coyote#which i am soooo excited to listen to#almost as big as the summer newman / holy locust connection lol#but i would say rail yard ghosts / holy locust / long sought rest and dare i even say spud bugs exist altogether in my brain#like more orchestral (?) folkpunk . idk its not just some guy with a guitar no offense pat and jesse LOL#anyway its good i love music :)
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#Okay so tw cuz im gonna rant about suicide#so back in July I planned on killing myself today#I told myself I needed to try n get better n if I couldn’t that was it#and I’ve tried I really have#and I’m obviously still struggling but not to the extent I was#like I’m depressed n my ed is getting worse#but I’m finally hanging out with D n she’s just so much fun to be around#im calling my bestie more and she sounds genuinely happy to hear from me#im doing a bit better with my parents to n im seeing my cousin more who I’ve missed so much#I have plans for break for the first time in years#im finally getting piercings#it’s crazy cuz even just 2 weeks ago I didn’t think Id be ok today#but I am like today isn’t gonna be another attempt I’m gonna make it#and that’s wild to me bc I was so bad over the summer I was constantly debating it that’s why I set the date#And I don’t think I’m fixed and there’s a big chance I’ll attempt at some point in the future knowing me#but right now I feel like I have a reason to try and I haven’t felt like that in a long time#okay I’m done now just wanted to say that#screaming#tw suicide#tw suicide mention#kinda
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im gonna practically b a senior a week from now holy fuck
#i am NOT prepared#taking 2-3 ap classes next school year#AND i have college and scholarship applications to do at the beginning of the year and i have no clue how they work#and the year is gonna go by real quick and next thing i know im starting college what the fuck#i just need to get through finals week and then i have summer break#wait im gonna hve summer assignments fuuuuuuuuuu
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when i say that i don't do things by halves, i mean it. exhibit a: the past few months have been spent with my parents reprimanding me for not revising enough for my exams, but now that i've decided to do it, i spend every second i'm at school (from 8am-4:30pm) studying. it's gotten to the point where my mother congratulated me on having lunch today. oh well, gcses only come once. i can have friends next year :)
#i get that it's like#important to take breaks or smth#but it's so much easier to focus in a classroom environment!#and there's so much more to do at home if i have a break later instead#i'll be fineeeee#just gotta get through 23 papers#then it's back to procrastinating until the end of year 13#when i finally choose to start revising again <3#i can pass without studying independently#i just jump like 3 grades when i do lol#take my chemistry grade for example#i've gone from a 6 to an 8 in the span of 2 months >:]]#it's a lot nicer to overstudy than to feel stressed about it though#thinking i was going to fail my life bc i was attaining a 5 in phys was. not nice#i am GREYING /gen#save me summer holidays...#summer holidays save me...
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Now that I have managed to properly put into my own thoughts and feelings on reload and these new canon materials. My post does contain spoilers for some of the materials, so be warned if you are actively playing through reload.
CANON TO MY PORTRAYAL.
The hangout events with male party members will be acknowledge, since they don't conflict with other past materials thankfully.
(an update to an old Headcanon) In the topic of Ryoji's social link and the whole confession that he give to Minato. I am still keeping it, in one of my oldest headcanon, I had said that Minato would realize he's bi/pan after spending time with Ryoji but never confess his feelings to him (alongside his romantic feeling for aigis). I am still keeping that, even when Ryoji confesses his feelings to him. He does go from being shock at first, but as anyone who has played / watched. The two get interrupted by Fuuka, so he didn't get to give Ryoji a proper answer and unfortunately he never goes through with giving Ryoji an answer, due to the news of who Ryoji is and what will be happening within a month.
Minato never bump into Takaya, I was really disappointed with how reload handled it. I felt that It didn't add much into the grand schema of things. I thought that maybe it'll be almost to the same level as adachi's social link, so I was disappointed when that wasn't the case. I simply don't think it's worth it for my character's portrayal.
The new OST reload has, will be acknowledge too, alongside the original OST. The only difference, is that he may prefer one version of a song over another but overall he may be seen talking about them or listen to them.
With the topic of the new gear S.E.E.S receive. I debated over it whether or not I will accept them into my portrayal, I don't dislike them anymore, as I had gotten used to them when I playing the game. However, after thinking over it more, they didn't bring much to the table in term of lore. ( It was clear, they were there to give a new gameplay like P5R had going with the show time. ) Cause of it, I'm not going to accept it into my canon.
#* XIII ⫶ moment of truth there ain't no truce ⊹ ( headcanon. )#{ god now i finally had time to sit down and write this... i did say that I wasn't planning to have my muse be reload focus#and I am still fine with that choice. I like reload. its a fine game and it did my favorite persona game of all time good but i still prefe#the old ver anyways and don't want to suddenly drop them cause of reload! i'll update my boy's info page and rule page later in the topic#of this game later on once summer break come since i will be able to fully come here on here to do things#and not be busy with school stuff for awhile }
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me silently mixing hogwarts legacy into my dr…
#people not plot#i’ve had the game since it came out but now that summers here i finally have the time to play#and my god i’m loving it so much#it’s so real and looks exactly like hogwarts#like i actually never use the map because i just know#it’s so nice and lovely and a refreshing break from this reality almost#only i don’t like how ravens have a bottom bunk because i am a proud top bunk girlie#hogwarts legacy#hogwarts dr#reality shifting#shifting script
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me, logging in to find something rq: how do i still have traffic here? me, checking my notifs: oh. corn.
#haven't logged in in a month and i have like 40 notifications??????? 30 of them are bots#LIKE ??? LMGJSNJHRH#anyway i'm still over on kaz though i am relatively very slow activity wise until the weekend when my summer break finally begins#you can also find me on discord <3#BLOWING KISSES (not to the bots pls vanquish urselves)
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