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lyak12 · 6 months ago

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Just friends

Lucy Bronze x Reader

Summary: Lucy has been your girlfriend for three years already, but lately, she's spending more time with Ona than with you. Is she falling out of love with you?

Word count: almost 4.2k

A/N: I'm back with another Lucy fic:) Thanks to @helen-with-an-a for the inspiration:) I still have a few requests that I want to finish soon, but I'm currently swamped with uni stuff... so be patient with me. Also, there is a happy end cause my heart can't take pure Angst hahaha. I hope you enjoyy

Warnings: Anxiety, struggling with self-worth, concussion, vomiting, angsty in general, if I missed something lmk:)

Living in sunny Barcelona, playing for one of the best clubs in the world and all of that with the love of your life. A pretty perfect life one would say. Well, currently, you are feeling none of that.

You are insecure. You always have been, but normally, Lucy is quick to pull you out of that mindset. You’ve struggled with self-worth your whole life. Always thinking everyone is better than you. It has gotten better since you started dating Lucy over three years ago, but one of your biggest insecurities is still that she’ll get sick of you and leave you for someone better.

You know Ona is just a friend. She’s Spanish and they’re really close, so of course there will be lots of physical contact. You don’t mind that. You’re not jealous. You’re just scared Lucy will fall out of love with you and in love with Ona.

All the edits on Tiktok and insta were not helping. It got so bad that Lucy tried to block the hashtags on your accounts. It worked for a while but not long.

As Lucy spends the third afternoon in a row with Ona, you start to get even more insecure and a bit pissed to be honest. “Again? I thought we wanted to go to the beach today”, You ask a bit annoyed. “Am I not allowed to spend time with my friends anymore?”, Lucy asks defensive, not liking your tone. You just sigh and say, “Never mind, have fun”, you say and go into the bedroom.

Lucy doesn’t bother to come after you. You have been having the same discussion for days already. Lucy completely oblivious to the fact that your anxiety is bad at the moment, instead thinking you’re jealous. You change into some shorts and a crop top before going back into the living room, ready to take Narla to the beach instead. However, Narla is gone, too. Lucy must’ve taken her with her to Ona.

Great, you don’t even have your cuddle buddy now. Sighing again, you dry the tears that have escaped your eyes. You grab a hat and sunglasses and go to the beach on your own. Needing to spend your time somehow and the beach and ocean help clear your head.

You get home late, just needing the time to think. “Where have you been?”, is the first thing you hear when you get in before you come face to face with an angry Lucy and an excited Narla. “The beach”, you just say as you squat down to greet the dog. “Until now? You couldn’t look at your phone? I was worried out of my mind!”, Lucy asks loudly.

“I haven’t looked at my phone since I left the house”, you just say without looking at the brunette. “Y/N I’m talking to you! I was worried”, She says angrily. You flinch slightly at her tone. The tears you worked so hard to fight back threatening to escape. You look up and say “I’m sorry. I needed to think. I didn’t realize how late it was getting “, you say quietly, trying to stay busy with scratching Narla’s little belly.

“Next time, look at your phone”, Lucy just says and turns around before getting back to the couch. You cuddle Narla a bit longer, the Westie noticing the inner turmoil in you.

Eventually, you stand up and head into the living room as well. “How was your time with Ona?”, you ask quietly. “You gonna get jealous again if I say good?”, Lucy grumbles. “Lucy, I’m not jealous!”, you say defensively.

“Oh really? Then why are we having this same fight over and over again?”, she asks, looking at you. “Because you’re spending every free minute with her. It’s like you’re attached at the hip. I’m sorry I want to spend time with you too”, you argue.

“Yeah sure, that’s the reason. I’m sorry I’m spending time with my friends. Damnit, Y/N! It’s obvious you’re jealous, at least own up to it!”, Lucy yells, and that cuts deep. That sentence just lets something snap in you. “You want me to own up to it? Fine! I’m NOT fucking jealous Lucy! I’m scared. I’m scared you’re falling in love with Ona! I’m scared you’ll drop me as soon as she says yes”, you yell with tears streaming down your cheeks, letting yourself be vulnerable in front of Lucy.

“Oh don’t be ridiculous! Ona and I are friends, and that’s it! You should hear yourself. It’s absurd. Stop making a big deal out of nothing”, Lucy dismisses your fear. She has never done that before. She knows how your mind works and what she just said will make you spiral. Apparently, though, she doesn’t care.

You just look at her and dry your tears roughly. Giving her a nod before you head away from her. “Where are you going?”, Lucy asks, confused. She can see you’re still angry. “Why do you care? I thought I’m just being dramatic”, you snarl as she notices that her choice of words maybe were not the smartest.

“Y/N”, Lucy tries half-heartedly. “No. Not once have you treated me like this. You act like I’m not even here! You don’t pay attention unless I’m saying something about Ona. You know how much that hurts?”, you yell tearfully. “Now you’re exaggerating…”, Lucy says with an eye roll. You just look at her in disbelief and give her a nod. You swallow hard and say “I’m going to bed.”

With that, you leave her alone in the living room and head to the bedroom. Normally, you never go to bed angry. That is one rule that’s important to both of you. Well, tonight, the rule will be broken. By the time she comes to bed, you act like you’re asleep already. She still kisses your head, but you just pull away from her slightly.

You hear her sigh softly, but she doesn’t say anything. Eventually, you fall into a restless sleep.

As the alarm goes off the next morning, Lucy turns it off, and you just sigh. “Good morning”, Lucy says gently. “Morning”, you just grumble before you sit up with your back to her. “Seriously? You’re still pissed? Come on, it’s getting ridiculous”, Lucy says with an eye roll. You turn to her and say “Even if I wouldn’t be pissed anymore, I would be again after this comment. But yeah, of course I’m the ridiculous one. Because God forbid your stubborn brain could acknowledge that maybe you’re not as innocent as you tell yourself you are.”

You just get up and get into the bathroom. Lucy doesn’t say anything and just sighs. She really does not understand what your problem is. You get ready separately, but you’re not hungry, so you just grab a protein bar and gel to eat before practice.

The drive to the training grounds is quiet. You don’t say a word. Once in the locker room, you quickly change, but your teammates notice the tension between the two of you.

Mapi comes in just as you’re almost done changing. “Oh trouble in paradise?”, she asks with a slight tease. As an answer, you just grab your boots and drinks before walking out of the locker room.

Mapi just looks concerned at Lucy, the teasing smile wiped from her face. You normally enjoy Mapi’s teasing or at least chuckle slightly. “She’s been like that since we fought last night”, Lucy says with a soft sigh. “Last night?”, Alexia asks. Most of your team knew your rule to never go to bed angry. So as Lucy nods, most of them look concerned at each other. This has to be a bad fight.

Everyone can tell you’re not in the mood during practice. You play a lot more aggressively than usual. But not the type of aggressive that would hurt another.

You’re pushing yourself hard today, just needing to get out the frustration somehow. As you do a quick round of scrimmage halfway through practice, you run into the box to be on the end of a nice cross from Frido. However you’re a bit late, so you jump in at full speed, trying to find the ball and head it in. One of those flying headers Lucy is known for. Ona, however, is there to defend you, and since she’s running backwards, she doesn’t see you throwing yourself in for the ball.

You crash together, and the collision makes you hit the ball with your temple, unable to get it into the goal. You both land on the ground roughly, you a few feet away from Ona because of the speed you had come with.

You both groan for a moment, stars appearing in front of your eyes momentarily, your head throbbing. You close your eyes for a second, but as you hear Lucy’s voice, you open your eyes. However, her question, if you’re okay, is not directed at you. She is squatting next to Ona. That was it. Yes, Ona was lying closer to Lucy, but still.

“You okay?”, Frido asks you softly, and you just mumble “I’m fine.” You get up as Lucy walks up to you, resting a hand on your shoulder, but you immediately shrug it off and say “Don’t touch me. Don’t act like you care now.” The team has never seen you so angry. You just walk away from the brunette and make your way back to your position.

You high five Ona, not angry at her for the tackle. You squeeze the bridge of your nose slightly as you walk back. God, your head is throbbing. Your world is spinning, and you’re not feeling good at all. You try to shake it off, but Alexia can tell, so she rests a hand on your shoulder and asks “You okay, y/n/n?”

You don’t answer her trying to gather yourself. However, you only drop to all fours a few steps later as the dizziness becomes too overwhelming. “Y/N!”, Alexia yells and quickly waves the physios over.

“What’s wrong, Y/N?”, the Physio asks, and you can only mumble “Dizzy, head throbbing.” Your ears were ringing slightly as you struggle to keep your composure. They look into your eyes and can see that they are unfocused. “Where did you hit the ball?”, he asks softly, having an idea what might be going on.

Your hand moves to your temple and the spot right next to your ear as you almost lose balance and face plant the grass. The physios steady you, and he says, “Yeah, that might be a concussion, let’s get you off the field and checked out.”

“Let me help”, Lucy says, wanting to help you up. “No, please just leave me alone”, you shrug off her hands with tears in your eyes. Alexia steps in and pulls you to your feet before guiding you to the physio room.

“What happened between you? Talk to me”, Alexia asks on the way, knowing the tears are from the emotional pain, not the physical. “We fought badly. She’s been spending a lot of time with Ona lately and ditches our plans for her. You know I’m not jealous. I know they’re just friends, but I’m scared Lucy is starting to fall in love with her and just waits to drop me. However, she completely dismisses my concern, telling me I’m ridiculous and dramatic. I don’t want her here. It’s like I’m not even there anymore. It's always just Ona”, you tell her tearfully, she wraps you in her arms for a second while you sob.

After a minute, you get it together, and Alexia presses a kiss to your head. “I know me saying this won’t help, but Lucy only has eyes for you, but I understand. I tell her not to come in here, but you gotta promise me you’ll talk to each other, okay?”, She says seriously. You just nod before you lie back on the physio bed.

Alexia leaves, and the physio checks you for a concussion. “So you said you’re head hurts and you’re dizzy, any other symptoms?”, he asks softly, shining a light into your eyes. “Nausea, sensitivity to light. I feel a bit out of it”, you answer, and he just nods. “Yeah, I’m pretty sure this is a mild concussion. The ball really hit you on an unfortunate spot. You should feel better after a few days, but for now let’s get you home and get some rest. No straining activities, keep yourself hydrated, and get some sleep, alright?”, he asks, and you nod.

He helps you get changed before driving you home. The motion of the car makes the nausea so much worse that you throw up as soon as you're home. You try to rest and sleep, but your head won’t let you. The thoughts just crashing on each other making you restless, so you pull on your sunglasses and a hat, grab your headphones to dampen the sounds and make your way to one of your favorite spots at the beach. It’s not a long walk, so you’re fine. The area is usually not filled with many people, so you just lean against the railing and look out on the sea as you sink into your thoughts.

Meanwhile, Alexia walks back out to see everyone have a small water break. Lucy is standing with Keira and Ona, nibbling on the bottle nervously. “How is she?”, she asks Alexia, concerned. “She’s hurt, not just physically. Lucy, what the hell is going on with you? You know how Y/N is, you can’t tell her she’s dramatic and ridiculous, thinking she won’t spiral”, Alexia says a bit angry. Everyone on the team knows that you need reassurance, especially when those thoughts in your head get too loud. And they all could see that was the case lately. “What?”, Keira and Ona ask at the same time as they look at Lucy disappointed. “She was going on and on about how I keep spending time with you and never with her. I just figured she was jealous, and it isn’t a big deal. And as she told me she’s scared I will fall in love with you just something in me snapped, I couldn’t stop it”, Lucy tries to argue quietly as she looks at Ona, but she knows she’s in the wrong here.

Alexia just smacks her hard in the back of the head and grumbles “Estúpida!” “Lucy, her logical brain knows that there is just friendship between us. But you know how insecure she can get, and it’s been getting worse again lately. You should’ve been more attentive”, Ona says, disappointed. “Yeah you better fix this before it's too late”, Keira says seriously, and Lucy just sighs, realizing that she really messed up. “Right now she doesn’t want to see you, I think she has a mild concussion so give her some space, but you guys gotta talk tonight”, Alexia says and gives the brunette a little shove back onto the field.

At the end of practice, Lucy immediately runs to the physio room, but you’re gone. „Where is she?“, Lucy asks the physio as he comes in. „I drove her home. She needs rest“, he says, and she just looks worried at him. „Lucy, relax. It’s just a mild concussion. The ball just hit her at the wrong spot. She’ll be okay in a few days“, he says reassuringly, but it does little to calm her worries. She pushes her hair out of her face and takes a deep breath. „I know, I just really messed up. Thank you for driving her home. I gotta go“, Lucy says and jogs into the locker room. Changing with the speed of light before grabbing her bag and running out again. She doesn’t have time for a shower. She needs to get to you.

Speeding home, she runs in and looks around for you, but the apartment is empty. Grabbing her phone, she calls Alexia. „She’s not here“, Lucy says as soon as Alexia picks up. „Lucy, calm down. What?“, Alexia says, still in the locker room with most of the girls. Ona and Keira look up as Lucy‘s name falls, coming a bit closer so they can hear too. „She’s not here. Y/N is not here. She was told to rest, where is she? What if something happened?“, Lucy asks, worried. Rechecking all the rooms. „Hey Luce, calm down. Come on, take a deep breath“, Ona says, and Lucy rubs a hand over her face before taking a deep breath. „Think. Is there any place Y/N could be? Any place she likes to go to think?“, Keira asks gently but worried about you as well.

The line is silent for a moment as Lucy tries to think. „Isn’t there a spot at the beach close to your apartment that she likes?“, Alexia asks as she remembers you telling her about something like that. „Yeah, I think I know where she is. I‘ll keep you updated, thank you“, Lucy says and hangs up before she grabs her keys and phone and is out the door again. Leaving a completely confused Narla behind.

She sends a quick text to Ona and asks her if she could take Narla out while she was looking for you, which she, of course, does. She runs almost the whole way to the beach. As she gets to the part where it is quiet and especially during this time empty, she sees you leaning at the railing. She sends a quick „I found her“, message to the three girls and packs her phone away. Catching her breath, she slowly approaches you.

„What are you doing here?“, you just ask without looking at the brunette. You know exactly who it is without having to take a look. „I wanted to make sure you’re okay“, Lucy says softly, taking your headphones from your ears carefully. You look at her, your eyes hiding behind your sunglasses. „As you can see I’m fine“, you just say.

“Y/N, I’m sorry. Can we please talk?”, Lucy asks softly. “What? You just wanna tell me I’m ridiculous again? I can deal without, thank you”, You just say and turn to look out to the sea again. “Hey, no”, Lucy says and guides your chin back to look at her. She pushes your sunglasses up to look into your eyes and says honestly “I messed up badly, and I’ve been an ass. I didn’t pay attention and did not treat you like you deserve. I’m sorry. I know a simple I’m sorry won’t do it, but I need you to know that.”

“You know how disgusting it feels to be treated like you make a big deal out of nothing, when it’s all you can think about? When your insecurities and anxiety get dismissed with a simple, you’re being ridiculous? You know how I am Lucy. My logical brain knows that Ona and you are just friends. A simple reassurance and afternoon spend together would’ve fixed everything, but instead, you had to treat me like a piece of shit. Like I’m just this jealous clingy girlfriend. Do you know how much that hurt? To feel like you’re throwing three years away just like that? I’m not asking you to stop spending time with her or not checking on her when she goes down during practice, but, for fucks sake, don’t take me for granted. I don’t need much, but if you want this relationship, you gotta treat me with the respect and love I deserve. Because I can’t take whatever this is much longer. Love me or leave me, that simple”, you tell her as tears start to fall from your eyes. The more words leave your mouth the more tears fall.

She knows how fast you can spiral, but she hasn’t expected it to be this bad. She gently dries your tears as she starts to tear up a bit herself. “Y/N I’m so sorry. I don’t know why I acted like that. I should’ve seen how much my behavior hurt you. Instead, I just kept going and didn’t pay attention. I was wrong, and you didn’t deserve that. I never wanted you to even think about doubting that my love for you is still there. I messed up, and yes, I took you for granted without noticing, and I’ll never forgive myself for that. Y/N, I love you. I love you so much, and I don’t know how my head got so messed up that I stopped trying to show that to you. I’m truly sorry, I promise to make it up to you if you let me. I promise, I love you like you deserve because you deserve the world, my love”, Lucy says honestly, and you just hiccup slightly, trying not to sob. This is all you needed to hear, but you spiraled so deep you’re not sure if you can trust her words.

“Are you just saying this, or is this the truth?”, you ask tearfully. “It’s the truth, please let me make it up to you and love you like you deserve”, Lucy says softly, scared that she really messed up so bad that she’s past the point of a second chance. “Okay”, you mumble quietly, praying you won’t regret trusting her. You’re just in a bad place mentally, and it’s hard to even trust Lucy.

As she hears the okay, she’s quick to pull you into her arms and kisses your forehead. She holds you close, and you cling to her, crying into her chest. Tears are falling down her cheeks as well, but her focus is on you. She needs to take care of you now, treating you like you deserve.

It takes you a few minutes to calm down, Lucy’s heartbeat being able to pull you out of those dark clouds in your head and into a more relaxed state. But that also makes you feel the symptoms of the concussion again. It’s a blessing and a curse. You squeeze your eyes shut as your world spins.

Lucy can tell how unsteady you’re getting, so she just tightens her grip on you and says “Shh, I got you, my love. Let me take care of you.” You just clutch her shirt tightly, leaning on her heavily. Your head pounding. “Let’s get you home. You want me to call a cab to get us home?”, Lucy asks softly as she kisses your head. “No, the motion makes me throw up. I’ll be okay, just give me a minute”, you mumble and try to breathe through the pain and dizziness.

“Take your time, I’ll carry you if you need me too”, Lucy says, and you know she will, but it’s a 15-minute walk to your shared apartment. “Yeah and then you won’t be able to walk for the next three days because of your knee”, You tease weakly. Lucy can’t help but smile at this slight return of banter. “It’s worth it for you”, Lucy just says with a soft shrug and smiles before she kisses your forehead.

You just smile softly and rest against her for a moment longer, taking a few deep breaths. “Okay, I’m ready”, you mumble, and Lucy wraps an arm around your waist to steady you while you make your way home slowly. “When you need a break, tell me”, Lucy says and kisses your temple gently, and you nod.

To be fair, by the time you’re almost home, she is half carrying you. You’re exhausted and definitely pushed yourself too hard today after your concussion. The nausea gets worse the more you walk, so barely five minutes away you stop Lucy and start to throw up again into the grass without much of a warning. “Okay, I got you, love. Deep breaths”, Lucy says, gathering your hair and rubbing your back while keeping you steady. There is not much for you to throw up, so you calm down quickly, but your legs are threatening to give out.

“Do you want me to carry you on my back or bridal style? What do you think will make you less dizzy?”, Lucy asks, it’s not a question of if. It’s how you want to be carried. “Bridal”, you just mumble quietly. Being able to hide your face in Lucy’s neck sounds amazing. She picks you up immediately and carries you the rest of the way home. Did her knee protest a bit? Yes, but she’d do it all over again without a thought.

Once home, she carries you to bed, and you’re greeted by Narla, who jumps on the bed and showers you in kisses. Lucy sets up a bucket and enough water before tucking you in. “Get some sleep. Rest that pretty head of yours. I’ll be here when you wake up”, Lucy says, running her fingers through your hair. “Promise?”, “Promise. I love you”, Lucy says softly.

“I love you too, I missed you”, you just mumble before you doze off. The last thing you feel is a kiss on your forehead.

#lucy bronze x reader #woso fanfics #lucy bronze #woso angst #ona batlle #alexia putellas #keira walsh #woso community #woso fic #woso x reader #barça femeni

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honeybeedrabble · 9 months ago

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Dangerous Desires (ix) - Home Coming

CW: spanking/brat taming, hair pulling, biting, licking, breast play, marking, unprotected piv (dont be stupid), rough sex, slight fingering, degradation, choking, cream-pie (DONT BE STUPID), probs some shit editing, LMK what i missed !!

word count: 10K 💀💀

18+ MDNI !!!!!

You stood in front of the hokage, heart beating out of your chest. You were nervous, that much was obvious. However you couldn’t wrap your head around why you were summoned. Lady Tsunade finished writing her last few words into her notes, stapling them together and setting them aside to address you.

“You must be wondering why I’ve sent for you,” she started, sitting up in her seat. Her face was somber.

“I can’t say you’re wrong.”

“What I’m about to tell you is something only a very select few know about.” Tsunade started, hands clasped together on the desk. “We’re about to go to war.”

You were shocked- was Kakashi really telling the truth?! Was he right all along?! Your emotions were everywhere and it was evident on your face.

“I know, I know it’s a lot to take in. I myself am not sure if I’ve taken it in yet.” She seemed stressed, you could see the worry behind her soft brown eyes.

“Lady Tsunade… who are we at war with?”

“My dear who aren’t we at war with?” She sadly laughed to herself. “Truth be told we’re fighting against a greater force than we know. I hate to say this but we’re looking at a fourth great ninja war.“ Your eyes widened, body filled with anxiety.

“A fourth great war? Are you serious?”

“I’m as serious as death. In fact, there’s going to be a five kage summit soon and I’ll need to attend to talk about said war.”

“So… The war isn’t with the other nations? I mean… if there’s going to be a summit with all five nations, doesn’t that mean neither is the threat?” You asked, still confused.

“Exactly.”

“Then who’s the threat?”

“I can’t discuss that with you.”

“Then why have I been summoned Lady Tsunade? If you can’t tell me who the enemy is tell me what I’m here for.” You were starting to get angry, worried for what you’d been told previously.

“You need to fight in this war.” Tsunade said plainly. “With medical jutsu like yours we would be idiots not to use you. I’m telling you now that we’re not asking you to enlist, but rather we are drafting.” Kakashi was right.

You couldn’t believe him, it was impossible to. How could this be happening? It wasn’t long since you’ve been here and already you’re being drafted in the war. It was exactly how Kakashi had told you, no denying it. This is your job, what you were sent to do, the only thing you know how to do, so damn right you’re going to use your blessing to help all you can.

“I’m well aware of my capabilities my lady, and in fact I find it a great honor to be drafted by you personally.”

“You’re taking this a lot better than I thought you would, I must thank you for that.” She sighed a relieved breath, hand clutching her chest.

“I have no other choice but to. This is what I signed up for when moving to Konoha. I decided the day I learned my first medical justu I would help the world become a better place. If you hadn’t drafted me I would’ve signed up myself. It’s my duty, this is my home.” Your words moved Tsunade, she smiled softly at you. Her face dropped suddenly.

“I’m glad you believe that, and I’m glad to have someone like you be so ready for whatever is to come, really I am. But because you’re going to be in the war I need to to preserve your chakra. Because of this, I forbid you from working at the hospital.” She looked away from you, knowing she didn’t want to see the determination wash away from your face in real time.

“Are you… are you firing me?”

“I’m afraid so. I cant have you waste any of your precious chakra on a few sick patients when we are going to have armies full of injured shinobi on the front lines. We have enough medical personnel at the hospital already, so with you being as high ranked as you are we must save you for the battlefield. You understand don’t you?”

“Lady Tsunade what more do I have other than my job? How long will it be until we are in war? I-I can’t be out of work that long.”

“I’m sorry but my hands are tied.” Her voice was almost as sad as yours, she worriedly watched as your eyes started to well with tears.

“Please my lady. Don’t do this to me.” She got up from her desk and walked over to you, hugging you tightly against her.

“It’s going to be alright, I promise. I just need you to rest up. We’ll be destroyed without you, please just trust me.” You hugged eachother until you could calm down, you wiped any tears that fell and stepped aside.

“Lady Tsunade I have a request to make.”

“What is it dear?”

“I want to go home. Back to my village and see my parents one last time before I go to war. I think it’s only reasonable to see them one last time, as me coming home alive and well is uncertain.” Tsunade stepped back and looked at you, a hand draped softly on your shoulder.

“I accept the request. How long will you be gone?”

“Probably under a week.”

“Then so be it. You’re dismissed.”

You walked out of the office and back home with an intense sadness inside of you. You gave up on Kakashi because you loved your job. Now your job has been stolen from you and it was all for nothing. Everything that had given you value- that had given you purpose- is now gone. You wondered if you should even return home or not.

You decided it would be a good idea if you told your friends Machi and Gale you’d be gone for the next few days, back at home until you decided you needed to come back. They understood and wished you well on your journey.

Kakashi was a mess, thinking about how poorly he treated you during your sexcapade, saying he hated you and fucking you so roughly he wasn’t sure if he had hurt you or not. Who care if he did? You hurt him worse. You hurt him in a way nobody else has. How could you treat him like he was somebody only to leave him like he was nothing? At least, that’s how he saw it.

Business at The Poison Sandwich was slow today, maybe the sadness was in the air. Kakashi ate his BLT, thoughts of you racing through his head. Even up until he heard your name uttered by the two girls you held dearly as friends.

“So she went back home.” Gale said to the cook behind the counter.

“I’ve been thinking about visiting a few of the sandwich shops in her village for a while now actually.” Percy smiled from behind the counter.

“Wait… she went back?” Kakashi interrupted, unsure if he heard right.

“Yeah, yesterday. Said she’s be back in a few days.” Machi said, looking over at Percy. “He said he was going to go the her village pretty soon to try out the food there.”

“Is this true Percy?” Kakashi asked his friend, who nodded as he discarded his white apron.

“Yeah. Why?”

“Can I come?” Kakashi asked, cursing himself. What was he thinking?

“Well as long as you don’t have any other plans for the rest of the day, I see no problem. I’m heading off now, so get ready.” Percy said, untying his apron and tossing it on a nearby countertop. “Ladies, you don’t mind closing shop for me, do you?”

And of course, as enamored with the man as they were, had zero issue and took care of business as he and Kakashi took off.

_____________

Kakashi was shocked to see the strange motorized bike that Percy had built, looking it up and down in shock and awe at the mechanism.

“What is this, if I may ask?”

“Well I’m not a shinobi like you so getting around to long distances isn’t easy for me. I built this myself as a way to make the trips easier.” Percy said, tossing Kakashi a black helmet. Kakashi caught it and reluctantly adorned it, his silver hair peeking out from underneath.

As Percy started the machine Kakashi sat in the back behind him, pondering why he had felt the need for such an impromptu visit to your hometown. He didn’t know why he felt this way, especially after the way you had treated him. Once again he felt alone, abandoned by your heartlessness and eager mindset to go fight off in a war that he felt would mame and kill you the second you had your back turned to the enemy.

“Kakashi… what’s been going on with you?” Percy asked, snapping Kakashi out of the trance he found himself in.

“I’m sorry?” He asked, puzzled at his friends sudden questioning.

“Listen... Gale, Machi, and I all know about your secret affair. And we don’t care- we support it honestly. But ever since you two have had a falling out… we’ve noticed a change.” Percy’s voice was somber as he drove throughout the thick forest, focused on the destination while his heart was stuck in the conversation. Kakashi was silent a moment, his mind was racing. Was it safe to tell his friend the truth? To let the secrets of his beloved lay out in front of someone who was only watching from the outside?

“I’m not sure I understand,” he replied monotoned. His outside demeanor was cool, but anyone who really knew what was going on inside his mind could tell the intricacies of his tone, picking up the way his voice would lilt anxiously as he declared this inquiry.

“Well I’m sure you do, so don’t play dumb with me Hatake,” Percy snapped, he wasn’t playing games- Kakashi was sure of this now.

“Well what do you want me to tell you? Sometimes people don’t work out the way they meant to, we don’t have control over these things. All you need to know is that me and her are… we’re complicated.”

“Bullshit.” Kakashi was taken aback.

“What are you talking about?” The wind was blowing through his hair, headband threatening to blow off his eye. He held it tight, looking at his thighs for avoidance.

“I’m talking about your seriously psychotic desire for control. You’ve wanted her from the moment you met her, haven’t you?” Percy asked, revving the engine of his bike.

“More than anything…” Kakashi admitted, vision still remained on his thighs.

“And ever since then, what have you done?”

Kakashi thought about it for a moment. What had he done? He had fucked you on his desk, broken into your home and stolen your underwear, touched you while you slept, fucked you at work, fucked you on missions- gods... the list could only go on.

“I’ve done all I could.” He clutched his fists, hating how horribly his stomach churned. “And yet it still wasn’t enough.”

“What do you mean?”

“I mean that my love for her has consumed me, my body, brain, and soul. She’s all I think about- ever. She’s everything, and everywhere. No matter what time of day or night, I can feel her down to the very air I breathe. I’ve tried for what has felt like forever to have her all to myself.”

“Why all to yourself?”

“Because the thought of her with anyone else makes me violent,” Kakashi said, regretting his words the very moment they spilled past his lips.

Percy remained quiet, Kakashi wasn’t sure if it was so he could talk more or not. He stayed silent for a while too. He wondered wether Percy was judging him, then again he didn’t care too much, it wasn’t him who was worried about public appearances.

“Sometimes I can feel my blood boil when I see another man talking to her. She makes me feel at peace, not just in my mind but in my soul. I love that woman down to the marrow in my bones and to think that some other man could see her and only see her for her beauty, only see her for something to use makes me sick. I can practically feel the bile in my throat just thinking about it.”

“So she makes you feel calm?” Percy didn’t seem to be turned off by the way Kakashi spoke of you, it was as if they were having a conversation so casual it was comparable to one about the weather.

“It’s beyond that,” Kakashi felt his heart flutter as he thought of you, his mind running with excitement just at the opportunity to talk about you.

“Sometimes I think about my past and all the people who have left me. Some of them chose to, some of them didn’t. Regardless, whenever I’d get attached to someone they’d leave, I didn’t have any control over it. Maybe it was because I was weak, or too young to have any real say in the matter. But now it’s different. I’m stronger and I’m older, no matter how you look at it I’m ten times the person I was all those years ago.” Percy remained silent, listening intently to his friend. Something he wouldn’t do to much of as Kakashi wasn’t the type to open up easily.

“When I met her, I knew instantly I loved her. It was a fact just as true as the sky is blue. I don’t think about all the horrible things from my youth whenever she’s around, not when all I can think about is the possibility of my old age spent with this wonderful woman. And the only way to have a future with her is if she doesn’t leave. I’ve grown beyond a simple lust for her, I've realized I can’t escape these feelings. I learned about her past, her favorite flowers and I’ve showered her in as much affection I can show without being too much. I’m sure I’ve crossed that boundary already but I can’t help it, I have too much inside to not let go of.”

“So you want something serious with her?”

“Yes.”

“Why call it quits now? After everything you’ve gone through, why give up?”

“Because she’s going to leave me,” He ran a hand through his silver hair, holding back a tear that was heard through the slight crack in his voice.

“She told you she doesn’t want to be together anymore?” Percy asked, wondering if what his girlfriends told him about you was true or not. He remembered hearing how you liked Kakashi too, but was afraid of ridicule, yet still craved his love beneath it all.

“She wants to fight in a possible deadly battle. I cant disclose much but that’s all I can say.”

“But she’s strong isn’t she? Plus she’s a medic, so wouldn’t she be able to heal herself if anything happened?” Percy asked, unsure about the severity of this “battle”.

“You don’t get it,” Kakashi sighed, leaning his forehead against Percy’s back. “I can keep her through affection and intimacy, that’s one thing we both know we have for each other, it’s apparent. But I can’t keep her from getting herself killed. Death is around every corner for people like me and her.”

“Shinobi, you mean?”

“Exactly. I don’t want to be in love with someone and yearn for them every second we aren’t together just for them to leave and die. It’s not fair to torture myself like that. I’d rather call it quits early before I’m doomed to live a life of suffering. I couldn’t deal with it.”

“Kakashi, you already are.” Percy didn’t care to tiptoe around the fact, he was tired of all the beating around the bush. Kakashi sat there a moment, his head still resting against his friends back.

He closed his eyes, occasionally catching himself to hold onto the bike better as they jostled over small rocks and bumps along their path. Kakashi didn’t have much to say about that, but it did prompt a lot of thinking, not that he could do much with Percy being such a chatterbox.

“You need to hear me out with this, okay? Love is like a sandwich-“

“Good gods, spare me the metaphors…”

“I’m going somewhere with this trust me!!” Percy yelled defensively, his volume mostly washed out by the breeze blowing by. “You can have all the amazing fillings you want: intimacy, shared experiences, passion, romance, all that is great but without the bread that keeps it together it’s just a bunch of things slopped together. What makes a sandwich a sandwich is the bread that keeps it together- a solid foundation, trust. And sure, it’s going to be messy at times, but that just comes with that delicious journey we all sign up for.”

“Is there a point to this analogy?”

“Obviously, dumbass. You have all the makings for a great relationship except for the bread… the trust. The bread you’ve got is thin- real thin. Meaning it’s not able to keep all that great stuff inside. The only way that meals gonna end is with everything falling out. Do you know why your bread is thin?” Percy asked, dodging a large rock in the middle of the path.

“Because of my insecurities…” Kakashi admitted, his face heating up.

“Bingo.”

He sat with this realization, mostly because he was metaphorically eaten up alive by one of his best friends. That aside, he looked at the bigger picture. Was he really that insecure about his trust in you? He knew you were strong, but was he actually just insecure you would rather die than be with him?! Was he really that codependent on you? That wasn’t possible, not with war being such a great threat. Percy didn’t know that though, so that’s another thing to factor in. Regardless, there still was valid food for thought presented to him.

“Well how far away are we now?” Kakashi asked, looking around at the new environment.

“Wont take longer than a few minutes, bud. Relax, we’ll be there in no time.”

___________________

Percy was right of course, only a few minutes later and the two were parked outside the large wooden gates. Sounds of children’s laughter and music could be heard just beyond, as well as the smell of amazing food clouding their senses. Kakashi and Percy walked in, delighted by all the new sights and sounds, it seemed like a festival was taking place, although they had zero clue what it was for.

While it did seem magical at first glance, Kakashi knew the truth behind this villages facade. When he truly looked around beyond the vibrant colors and fun attractions, he saw very sick people lurking around the streets, some even begging for spare money. He sighed to himself, judging all the men who walked by with their expensive robes who were laughing at the sick and elderly.

“Kakashi! Over here!” Percy called to him from beyond the crowd.

Kakashi looked over to where his friend was and saw a small shop next to some sort of brothel-esque building. He tilted his head in curiosity at him, raising both arms in a shrugging position.

“No- come over here! This is the place I came here for!” Percy called louder, holding open the shops door to signal he was about to enter.

Kakashi jogged over there, still overwhelmed by all the excitement going around. When he caught up with Percy, he suddenly felt something very familiar. It was that calmness in his soul he had described to Percy earlier. He spun around, trying to see what it was and if he could follow it.

“Something the matter?” Percy asked, shutting the door.

Kakashi turned his head and saw a small staircase on the outside of the establishment that led to a second story door. He furrowed his brow looking at the door, feeling a strange calling towards whatever was just beyond it.

“No… I guess it’s nothing.” He said, turning towards Percy as he opened the door and walked inside.

It was a small restaurant, a few tables here and there as well as a large island that a middle aged man stood at.

“Hi, welcome in fellas! Take a seat anywhere you want, I’ll get you both a few menus to look at!” He said cheerily, ducking behind the island to grab two menus.

Percy sat at the island in front of the man, Kakashi followed and took the seat next to him. The older man gave them their menus and went in the back to give them some time.

“Are you hungry at all?” Percy asked, skimming the drinks side.

“I could eat,” Kakahi responded, suddenly craving a sandwich more than anything.

There were quite a few options to choose from. Some vegan options, some vegetarian, and some sort of dessert types with various different fruits, custards, and cream fillings. Kakashi was in the mood for something more traditional and hearty, deciding he would ask for a grilled chicken sandwich.

The man reappeared with a small notepad and pen, leaning against the countertop.

“You two ready to order?” He asked, looking at Kakashi first.

“Yeah, may I please have the grilled chicken sandwich?” He asked, pointing to the menu. The man wrote it down and then asked for Percy’s order.

“I’ll have this breakfast sandwich,” Percy said.

“A little late don’t you think?” The man laughed, taking both menus.

“Well you know… breakfast is the most important meal of the day. Why not have it anytime of day?” Percy laughed. The man furrowed a brow and Percy grimaced, embarrassed by his joke falling flat.

Kakashi couldn’t help but feel that comforting aura getting stronger around him. He looked around, maybe it was the environment? Just then it became much stronger, as if all this muscles had relaxed in just that moment. It felt less like an aura and more like a chakra. He quickly looked behind the man and towards the curtains that led to the back. What he saw he couldn’t believe.

You emerged from beyond the curtains, holding two cups of water in your hands. When you looked up you immediately locked eyes with him. You must’ve felt the same muscle relaxation as Kakashi, you suddenly dropped both cups catching the eyes of the room.

“Kakashi…?”

_________________________________

You had arrived to this hometown of yours not too long after you left Konoha. You watched as children ran around happily through the village with their prizes from games going on throughout the streets. You sighed, walking down the paths of the place you once called home, knowing the happiest of people were just tourists in this living hell your family and community was trapped in.

You approached your families restaurant, smiling at the nostalgic feeling it filled you with. You grabbed the handle and walked in, your father standing just behind the island. He called you name excitedly, rushing over to you to hold you in a tight hug.

“You’ve come home! What are you doing here? You didn’t get kicked out, did you?” He teased, letting you go to get a good look at you. You nervously laughed.

“No, it’s not that.” You said, rubbing the back of your neck.

“Well whatever the reason is, it’s nice seeing you again.”

“Um… can I talk to you upstairs for a moment? There’s something I need to tell you… it has to do with me being here actually.”

He nodded and held the curtain for you to walk through. Beyond the kitchen in the back was a small door that led to a staircase, that staircase led to the small flat you and your family grew up in. When you both had settled down in the living room, you had assumed your mother would be there, however she was not. Puzzled, you two sat on a nearby couch and you faced him to ask.

“Did mom go out somewhere? I mean… I didn’t see her in the restaurant or kitchen and it’s a little late to still be in bed…” Your fathers face fell, looking at the carpeting.

“Your mother is uh… well there’s no easy way to say this. Your mothers in the hospital.” You felt your heart drop.

“What’s wrong with her? Why didn’t you send a message?! I could’ve come home to help her- what’s going on dad?!” you asked, voice shaking.

He sighed deeply, rubbing his temples with one hand anxiously.

“We aren’t sure what was wrong with her but… we knew that with the big move and that new job of yours you’d have some real stress. We couldn’t put that on you, so we made the decision to send her to a nearby hospital to get her checked out.”

“Fuck…” you sighed, holding your head in your hands. “You need to take me to her, I can heal her… or fix her or… something- anything! Gods dad, what the hell?! Why wouldn’t you tell me?”

“Sweetie it’s fine, your mothers going to be okay-“

“Dad that’s a lot of money! For crying out loud, how are you going to afford the hospital bills?”

“We’ll be fine! as long as you’re okay we’ll be just fine.”

“Here, let me see if I have any extra money on me,” you reached into your pockets for your wallet. Your father quickly nudged your arm away.

“Please don’t, you have enough on your plate already. Why don’t you tell me what you needed to say earlier, okay?” He asked, putting on a small smile.

You frowned.

“Well, since we’re getting everything out in the open…” You took in a deep breath, letting it out with a shaky breath. “I’m going to war.”

You felt your heart shatter the way you watched your fathers face drop again. It was as if he was being told his only child was about to be killed right in front of him.

“Dad, I know how it’s sounds but I don’t have any other choice. There are people who need me, I signed up for this- this is my job.“

“I understand.” He said softly. You frowned, pulling him into a hug.

“I wanted to see you and mom one last time before I left… I know it’s a worst case scenario but… if anything were to happen, I wanted to tell you both goodbye.” You heard your father sob in your ear, holding you tightly. You couldn’t help yourself from crying either and wept with him on the sofa.

“I know you’re strong, and I know you’re valuable, but I’m still so worried,” he sputtered, you patted his back to comfort him but it did next to nothing.

“I know, but I promise you I’m not going down without a fight. I swear to you and mom I’m not going to let myself be weak.” You said sternly, almost as if you weren’t choking back a rivers worth of tears.

After a few more minutes and you and your father had calmed down, you sat there and discussed the situation of war. What it meant for you and your family. You said that with the money you had, it’ll all go to them if you died and they’d be able to move far away, to a better village and have a good financial place for themselves. Your father wasn’t pleased to hear about this and almost cried again. To get his mind off of it, you told him about your job and all the people you met at Konoha.

“Machi and Gale, huh? They sound quite nice! You even have your own students, sounds like you’ve adapted pretty well,” you dad smiled, tears drying on his cheeks.

“I have,” you smiled back, a blush forming in your face when you remembered Kakashi was one of the first you grew close with, even if it started out so riske.

“What’s that look for, hmm?” Your father asked, teasing you for the small blush across your face.

“It’s nothing,” you replied, putting a hand to your cheek and feeling the warmth on your skin.

“Don’t lie to me, I know that look pretty well. You must’ve met someone who isn’t just a friend or a student to you, so tell me!” He laughed, playfully swatting you on your arm.

“I mean, yeah there is someone,” you smirk, shortly after your face fell.

“Um… is everything alright?”

“Yeah, It’s just… things are complicated right now.”

“Oh,” you father said sadly, crossing his arms.

“But he’s a really great guy!” you perked up.

“He?” Your father asked. You nodded. “Does he have a name?”

“He might.”

“He might? What might it be?”

“It might be Kakashi.” Just the your fathers arms uncrossed, his eyes widening.

“As in Kakashi Hatake?”

“Oh great,” you sighed, hating this conversation immediately. “Yeah, why?”

“Because that’s the famous copy ninja! I’ve got to say I’m impressed.” You groaned, holding your knees to your chest now.

“Please stop embarrassing me.”

“I’m not trying to, I’m just suprised that a man like that can be in a relationship with you.” Immediately you grew defensive.

“What’s that supposed to mean?” Your brows furrowed.

“Woah, I didnt mean it like that! It’s just… he’s known for being such a hardened shinobi. Who knew there was a heart beneath the mask?” He nervously laughed.

“I knew.” You added. Your father frowned, nervously fidgeting in his seat.

“I’m sorry, " you sighed. "I didn’t mean to be so snappy. It’s just that we’ve spent a lot of time together and he means a lot to me. I’ve seen a lot of his sides and even though he drives me crazy I can’t help but love him regardless. He makes me feel seen, and appreciated. No matter how bitchy I am he keeps trying, nobody else has ever been this patient with me. And what makes things even crazier, is that I feel so drawn to him. It’s like my whole life has led up to the moment we’d meet. Oh, what am I saying? This is starting to get weird, I’ll stop while I’m ahead,” your face felt extremely hot, you avoiding looking at your dad.

“No it’s fine, I get it.” He said, patting you on the back.

“Yeah, thanks.” Silence.

“So what makes things so complicated?”

“‘What isn’t complicated’ is a better question,” although you knew that answer was something entirely too inappropriate to say.

“It’s that bad?”

“Yes and no. It’s a long story, I couldn’t get into it.”

“Well whatever the case may be, you sound like you really love him. In fact, I caught onto you saying that,” he smirked.

“Please stop.”

“Fine.” he raised his hands defensively, then stood up from his seat at the couch. “Now we can sit here moping all day or we can spend time together like we used to. What do you say?”

“Moping sounds good but we can’t afford that right now so let’s work the restaurant like we used to.” You smiled, following him down that stairs.

___________________

“Kakashi…?”

So that’s what it was, it was you all along. He should have known better. Kakashi stood up, uttering your name back to you. You weren’t sure what to do. Truth be told you didn’t forgive him for putting you out on the spot like that, but you also knew there was no real reason for him to forgive you either.

“I’m sorry but would you excuse us for a minute?” Kakashi asked Percy as he motioned to speak to you outside.

“No.” Percy said, fidgeting with his napkin. Your father shot you a concerned look, finally putting two and two together. You patted him on the back reassuringly.

“It shouldn’t take long, we’ll just have a chat upstairs.” You reached into your pocket for a set of keys, walking out the front door of the establishment, Kakashi on your tail.

You two walked out in silence and he followed you up the outside stairs, staying quiet as you unlocked the door and stepped inside. He looked around and it appeared to be your old bedroom, posters and ribbons hanging on the walls. It felt homey to him, more so when he noticed preserved flowers laying on your desk, jasmine to be exact.

“So did you follow me here or did you-“ he cut you off with his lips against yours. Your eyes grew wide in shock. But the moment he put his hand on the small of your back you felt entirely different. Your eyes closed softly and your hands tangled in his hair. You felt a familiar fire burn in your chest, your heart fluttering as his beat in tandem with yours.

“Kakashi,” you sighed, his grip on you becoming tighter. He pushed you against the door, keeping his grasp on you impossibly firm. “Now’s not a good-“

“Stop talking, damnit.” he huffed, his breath hot against your skin. Immediately you shut your mouth, only opening it again to allow his tongue to brush up against yours.

You locked the door while you were still up against it, then resumed pulling on his hair. You also pushed your body against his firm chest, feeling your loins flutter as his breathing became heavier and his kisses more desperate. Kakashis tongue prodded into your mouth, caressing your own as if it lost it, rejoicing in the feeling of finding it again. His body language spoke the same dialect, his arms tense while they wrapped around you, legs locked in place as they cornered you against the wooden door.

You grabbed onto his vest, yanking it off of him and it was only for a moment when his arms left your body. His vest sliding off of him and landing on the floor, he swiftly kicked it away and then resumed his primal grip against your body. He pulled you into him, a breath of air escaping your lungs the moment he ripped your body off the floor. Your legs instinctively wrapped around his waist, head falling to your shoulder while his teeth sunk into your neck, you let out a small grunt from the pain that you couldn’t welcome enough.

“Kashi?” you whispered heavily. He cut you off with another sloppy kiss, the rough smack of his lips against yours had you digging your nails into his back through his body con long sleeve. “What are you doing-“ another kiss “here?”

“What does it look like?” He huffed, hands sneaking past your shirt as he caressed your back with his long fingers. Your breath hitched at the feeling of him touching your bare skin, hair on the back of your neck raising while the tickling sensation of his calloused fingertips roamed your skin.

“I know what you’re doing, but why?”

“I needed you,” he rasped, fingers digging into your skin, his own nails now dragging down your skin. You shuddered in his grasp, thighs clamping down tight around his abdomen. “Must I need any other reason?”

“No…” you knew this was rhetorical, but the gratification you gained from answering him regardless heightened your arousal, giving into him just like you always did. “Needed me for what?” you asked, your chest rising and falling as you struggled to gain your composure.

“I just needed to see you,” Kakashi muttered licking the slight teeth marks that curved along your neck. “I missed this… the way things were before. Y’know I thought about inviting you over the other night?”

“To your apartment?” You were suddenly curious. He nodded, his hands now rubbing down your back, causing you to shiver once again. “What would we do?”

“I don’t even know. I was just so empty without you, even you being in my presence would be enough for me. However, I’m sure we’d find ways to entertain ourselves,” He leaned in closely to your ear “Wanna know how exactly?”

When he said this he thrusted himself into you, his hard package pressing right up against your clothed cunt. You moaned, grinding down on the new stimulation the moment you could, completely void of embarrassment or shame.

“Y-yeah,” your heart was practically in your throat now, however you felt the heartbeats much, much lower.

“Well, I had something in mind,” he hummed, his hands now on your asscheeks, gripping them harshly.

“Ngh- Like what?”

“I was thinking about how bad you’ve been lately,” his breath was almost burning the skin of your neck, you wanted him to so badly rip your clothes off of you and take you to bed. His hair smelled so good, you kept digging your fingers inside of the fluffy mass, gently pulling at it while it tangled between your fingers. He grunted slightly.

“Just like how you are right now,” it came out a purr, vibrations coming up from deep inside his chest. “You’ve been a bad girl. Sometimes I can barely recognize you.”

You didn’t know why you felt so ashamed about his words, a wave of regret crashing hard against you.

“I’m sorry,” you whisper, unsure why the apology came so easy.

“So you admit you’ve been a bad girl?” he asked with amusement in his tone, his voice hoarse as he spoke deep into your neck.

“I’m as bad as they come,” you admitted, legs wrapping around even tighter. He chuckles softly.

“Oh? Well then I think we both know what that means,” his cock twitched underneath his pants, you had to sink your nails into your palms to avoid getting handsy. “I think you need to be punished severely.”

The hair on the back of your neck stood up, goosebumps rising on your skin immediately. He carried you over to your bed, tossing you down on it. You crashed against it, a loud squeak echoing through the room. You blushed, hoping to whatever god there was that nobody downstairs could hear.

“What are you going to do with me?” You asked, your hands rubbing where he bit you on your neck.

“You want to know your punishment?” An amused smile spread across his face. You nodded. “Well that’s for me to know and you to find out.”

You felt frustrated, already wanting him to lash out on you, it felt like torture the way he stood over you, patently keeping his hands to himself.

“Please?” you whispered, one of your hands moving south of your body, he watched as your sunk your hands under your waistband, eyes blowing wide when your mouth fell open.

He grabbed your wrist and yanked it back out, pinning it down and above your head.

“I think you need another spanking.” You bit your lip, trying to hide your excitement, your panties already wet when he increased the pressure of his hand.

He sat down next to you, letting go of your wrist and instead using his hand to grab your hair into a tight pony tail, causing you to sit up.

“Should I bend over your lap?” it came out as a mewl, your desperation evident on your face.

“How funny that you just want to jump straight into it,” he smiled in your face, shiny teeth gleaming back at your from beyond his perfect lips. “Sweet girl, maybe you do know how to behave,” he kissed you softly, then had you bend over his lap.

With one hand still firm in your hair, the other pulled down your pants, your panties coming down with it. You clenched around nothing as the cool air hit your wet cunt, a shiver was sent up your back.

“Such a slut, excited for her spanking.” He caressed your soft globes, you hummed excitedly, almost moaning at the delicate touch. “If I hadn’t done this previously I would’ve assumed you didn’t know what this was. Is that true? Are you a stupid girl who doesn’t know what a spanking is?” he cooed, his hand grabbing you hip harshly, fingers digging into your skin.

You grunted, knowing with this much pressure he would leave bruises along you skin for days, weeks even.

“It’s not pleasant, at least not the way I do it, remember? It’s gonna hurt, way more than a few soft taps.”

“I’m hoping for it,” you replied back, surprised by your own response and enthusiasm.

“Oh yeah?” he also seemed surprised, pleasantly surprised. A wicked smile was plastered on his face, searching your eyes with his own. “How long have you been wanting this for? I mean, you’re so obedient. I cant help but assume you’ve fantasized about this ever since last time,” his grip of your hair tightened, you smiled up at him devilishly.

“I’ve been wanting this since I last saw you.”

“Good answer,” he smirked. “Are you ready?”

You nodded quickly, arching your back as the tension builds up in your body.

“An even better answer." his fingertips glided againsty the curve of your back. "I don’t care if you scream or cry, in fact it would make this more enjoyable,” he hummed, pulling on your hair. “Now sit still.”

Kakashis hand came down hard on your backside, a loud slap echoed in your ears. You let out a depraved moan, biting your lip as the stinging starting to settle on your asscheek. He took a moment to take in the look on your face, ogling the flush of color across your cheeks. Quicker, and much harder this time, he struck you again with his ever-so-firm hand.

You whined, squirming in his lap until he spanked you again. After his next, you dug your nails into the mattress beneath you, huffing deep breaths in and out. Kakashi laughs softly, watching your soft ass turn a bright pink as he punished you.

“How many can you handle? You want me to get creative?” he asked happily, softly rubbing circles on your abused skin.

“Y-yesss…” your voice was trembling.

“If you say so. But it makes me wonder… how much pain can this pretty little ass take?”

“I deserve it, we both know I’ve been bad,” you mutter, nails coming out of the mattress as you slowly began to get less tense with each rub of Kakashis hand.

“Yes you have,” Kakashi exclaimed amused. “Do you know how bad? Answer me.” He smacked you again, and all you could muster was a string of whimpers and groans, no real words coming to your mind.

“Answer me properly. I don’t want to hear your little moans. I want a real answer. Tell me what you’ve done.”

“I… I’ve kept you a secret…” you whispered, your hand stroking his knee. “And the worst part is I’ve been fantasizing about you this whole time.”

“Interesting. For how long, give me a number.” He pulls your hair, tilting your face upwards so your eyes are locked.

“8 weeks,” you confess, looking away to avoid his strong gaze.

“8 weeks? How filthy have you been? What’s the most inappropriate thing you’ve fantasized about me doing?” He pulled your hair tighter, forcing you to look back at him.

“I’ve thought about you defiling me.” Kakashi raised an eyebrow.

“That’s all? I’m not going to lie, I expected more from you.” His hand move from your ass to your hip, once again squeezing it tightly. You winced.

“I-I’ve thought about you waking me up just so you can use me to get yourself off,” you blurted out. Kakashi perked up, much more interested.

“Anything else? You’ve had 8 weeks,” clearly he was having fun toying with you. It felt like torture dumping your fantasies onto him, but you couldn’t help spilling your guts.

“I’ve thought about pleasuring you.”

“Go on.” His grip became looser, yet still firm.

“I’d use my mouth.” He smirked.

“Is that all?” You wanted to melt into his lap, escape his massive presence.

“And my hands…”

“Well, don’t you have a plethora of talents,” he teased, bringing his hand back and quickly down his to your ass. You flinched, but before he could make contact he stopped himself, laughing softly. Your face burned hot.

“Anything else? I mean, 8 whole weeks is a looong time,” he raised his eyebrow again, looking directly in your eyes.

“Well…”

“Spit it out, don’t be a tease. I know you can say more.” His words made your skin tingle.

“I’ve thought about how mad you were at me, ignoring me all the time at the office. So I thought about trying to rile you up, get you even angrier. Just so maybe you’d snap and use me without holding back.” He loosened his grip on you.

“You really want that? For me to take my frustration out on you?”

“Yes.” You gripped his knee tighter.

“You really are a bad girl, aren’t you?” He smirked, grip getting firmer in your hair again.

“I am.”

“Do you have no shame? Ass in the air, panties off, pussy soaking wet, and looking me in my eye while you tell me about all the filth you’ve imagined about me. Sweet girl, you’re more perverted than I thought.” He pulled your hair back further, his mouth connected with your more a quick kiss.

“I bet you’ll say anything at this point if it’ll make me happy, huh? You’ve completely given yourself to me, isn’t that right?” With lidded eyes you nodded looking up at him.

“Are you mine to use?” Amused curiousity lingering in his voice.

“Yes.” Right after you confirmed this, another rough smack was right up against your ass. You yelped, once again digging your finger into the mattress.

“You like that, don’t you? You like getting hit by me.” You nod. Another rough smack. “Say it.” he practically barked.

“I- I like it! I like getting hit by you!” You wanted to curl up in embarrassment, once again hoping nobody could hear you. Kakashi had a wicked look on his face.

“I wonder how many times can I hit this ass of yours before you cry? Are you a tough girl?” He asked condescendingly.

“Yes…” He hit you harder, producing a loud moan out of you. He laughed.

“Are you tough or what? You seem to be enjoying this more than I expected,” this time he struck you lower, so that his palm was right up against the back of your thigh. You desperately squirm again, breathing shakily. He hits you there again, smiling to himself.

“Oh? Am I hitting a sensitive spot?” You almost shrieked when he smacked it again. “So I did find a sensitive spot,” he leaned down closely so that that he was almost in your ear.

“I’m going to keep smacking you, riiight here until your crying and begging me to stop.” And that’s what he did. Over and over again, watching as you rubbed your legs together, slick coating the feverish in-between of your legs.

“How many more spanks can you get before you cry? 10? 20? I know you can take it,” he kept spanking you, each one lighting you up until your ass was red. As he spanked you, he enjoyed watching your eyes roll back, your whimpers echo softly in your room, and your body spasm after each moment of contact.

“You must nearly be at the edge, huh?” Your eyes rolled back to normal, welling with tears. “Awww, is that it? Is that all you can take?”

He delivered the final blow, you moaned loudly, tears flowing down your cheeks. You felt lightheaded, pain and pleasure circulating inside of you. The erotic sensation making it's way up your spine, the hairs on the back of your neck stood up.

“Aww… did I do that? Did I make the tough, pretty girl cry?” You nod, unable to verbalize a single thought. “Such a good girl, taking it like a champ. I have to say, I admire how well you kept your composure… well at least most of it.”

He pulled your hair back, your head coming closer to him and he placed a soft kiss on your forehead. You shut your eyes and bit your lip, your heart melting at his sudden tender affection.

While still having a good grasp of your pony tail, Kakashi slung you over to the side, trapping you against him and the bed. He had you pinned, your wrists above your head. When he towered his large form over you his lips brushed against yours, his scent was everywhere. You closed your eyes again, and felt how his eyelashes fluttered against your cheek as he bent down lower and licked up your neck.

You smirked, a sudden tickle causing you to slightly spasm, Kakashi laughed softly when he saw it. He instead turned to biting you, the feeling of his teeth in your neck filled you with the most euphoric nostalgia. You sighed, legs bending so your knees could squeeze his waist. He rutted his hips into your core, and you shuddered as the wet juices pooled in your cunt and trickled down your legs.

Kakashi looked up at you, lips curled into a cocky smile, pressing softly against your own. You parted your lips, his soft tongue dragging along your plump lip, before his teeth gently trapped it and he bit into it possessively. You never started the day thinking he'd be showing up at your old home, about to fuck you senseless into the mattress you've spent countless nights on. It seemed to you like Kakashi's fate was to always appear, and so was your passionate desire for him.

Kakashi's kiss could make your loins ache like a wildfire, yet it could also make your breaths slow and your heart melt. Maybe it was fate?

I am safe here. His arms are open, his tongue is tender, and I don't need to struggle anymore.

Its all you could think about, really.

Two fingers circled your drenched clit, Kakashi watched your hole clench around nothing. He licked his lips watching your pretty cunt swallow his didgets shortly after, curling up as he pumped in and out.

“She’s so pretty…” he hummed, his knuckles now shiny with your arousal.

Your toes curled the more he pumped you, his fingers working fast. You roughly grabbed his wrist, stopping his movement. He looked up at you, a single brow cocked.

“Something wrong?” his voice was smooth, eyes soft as they watched you with adoration.

“T-that’s not what I need…” You murmured, breathing in and out as if you’d pass out.

“Tell me, what do you-“

“Cock. Yours.” You demanded. Kakashis eyes grew wide, a sinister grin plastered in his face. He retracted his fingers from your cunt, a silent moan escaped your lips when he moved.

“I never thought I’d have you so needy, sweet girl.” Kakashis hand traveled to his waistbands and pulled them down, hard cock slapped against his body con shirt, precum making his tip glisten.

“I can’t help it.” You admitted, your eyes breaking away from his to stare at his erection. Your legs spread wide, and you wriggled excitedly.

Kakashi ducked down to kiss you, cupping your cheeks as he rutted against you, his length rubbing up and down against your clit. You moaned into the kiss, a smile on your face as your pleasure spread. You wrapped your legs around his waist and your arms around his neck, getting even closer as you two enjoyed eachothers embrace.

Kakashis tongue made its appearance in your mouth again, the soft tip of his tongue swirling with yours, just to retreat and wetten your lower lip.

“Don’t tease me…” you whispered, breaking the kiss only to resume it quickly. He laughed gently, his hand moving south to grab the base of his cock and align it with your entrance.

“Well, aren’t you one to talk?” With one swift motion he went balls deep inside of you again, a shiver running up his back as he bottomed out, his public bone flush with your clit.

You both grunted, then began to lock lips as his hips drilled into you. You both knew you didn’t want to waste any time, each time he bottomed out you grounded down on him further, feeling his warm precum coat your walls as your own arousal spilled out and onto the sheets.

“Always wet for me…” he smiled, kissing down your jaw.

His cock was heavy, stretching you perfectly and throbbing each time it hit that tender spot inside of you that made you digs crescents into his back with your nails. He loved watching your lashes flutter when your eyes rolled back, and he devoured your lips whenever they opened to produce a guttural moan.

“I love you…” Kakashi cooed, a finger of his now playing with your clit.

“Love you- haaah- too…” you replied with a whine between words.

Kakashi pulls your shirt off of you, then quickly grabs both your wrists in one hand. He pins you down, and you’re unable to move. He retracts his hand from your clit and presses his forearm under your tits, pushing them up and drooling at how pretty they sit. He ducks down and sucks a nipple, his soft tongue spreading hot spit over your sensitive tits. He moans, cock throbbing as you pulse around him.

He looks up at you, your face red and forehead slightly sweaty. Fuck, you look so sexy. He groans your name, biting your tit, sucking a hickey into the soft flesh in his mouth. You’re seeing stars, vision blurry as your orgasm comes washing over you. You’re whimpering his name, shaking and yet unable to move under his massive presence. He lets go of your tit in his mouth and watched over you. You were his own personal porn star, cumming for him- cumming on him. Whimpering his name as you choke his girthy cock and take him while he resizes your cunt.

“Filthy… you’re making such a mess.” His pace was quicker now, your cries of pleasure louder as he beats your pussy into the mattress. “Bad girl…” he hums low, almost a growl.

You can’t fight back the violent euphoria, your poor cunt wants more of him, regardless as to whether or not you can take it.

“S’ good…” you mewl, erotic and soft squelches filling your ears as he continues to stuff you with his member, his own orgasm on its precipice.

“You really are a slut of this cock, huh?” he teased, thrusting hard, keeping his dick stuffed deep inside you as he pressed his pelvis against your clit. His nails dig into your wrists, your fingers try to grab onto him but you just can’t reach.

“No more playing games,” he grunts, a hand letting go of your wrists to wrap around your throat firmly. You gasp, your air running thin. “You want me?” His hips retreat, then slam harsh inside of you. You wince, eyes snapping shut when you moan.

“Tsk tsk, look at me.” you follow his order, your brows knitted tightly together, looking up at him through your lashes. His teeth glimmer as he grins mischievously, his grip on your neck tightening. “Nah, you need me.”

You feel like you’re about to pass out again, legs shaking viciously and you felt light headed.

“My body always misses this pussy… fucking made for me.” He nips at your jaw, railing you at the one pace he knows you and he both like it. “Mine.”

He wants to mark you up, leave you purple for everyone to see. So when he notices how hard it is for you to breathe he lets go, and takes delight in how you choke for air. He sucks deeply at your neck, throbbing inside you when he imagines how it’ll look after.

“M’gonna cum again…” you almost plead, hips tilting up to meet his own, welcoming his gorgeous cock back inside of you where you knew it belonged.

“I bet you want me to cum inside you,” he mutters, letting go on your sensitive skin before he sucks another purple bruise into your neck.

“Please.” Is all you manage, your slick now running down your ass.

“Always a slut for my cum…” He bites your shoulder, his tongue licking at the red skin underneath. “Can’t fuck you once without you begging for a creampie.”

You cum for a second time, begging for his hot cum to fill you up and pour out. Kakashi complies, a few more rough thrusts and he’s pumping you full of his burning seed, you feel impossibly full as you throw your head back. Kakashi moans heavily, still pumping you with his cock, loving the way you squirt on him with your own spend.

“You can play with yourself thinking about this tonight,” he says low, kissing you hard while he continues to shoot ropes into you. You twitch, legs spasming as your orgasm refuses to subside.

“N-no. I wanna be with you tonight! I wanna do it again!” You beg, wrapping your legs even tighter around him. His eyes widen and he licks your neck playfully.

“My sweet girl, if I bring you home with me tonight I won’t stop until the sun comes up.”

“I’m prepared to lose a few hours of sleep if it means I can spend them being your whore.” You respond shamelessly. He lets go of your wrist and you grab the back of his head, fully making out with him as you play with his silver mess. “I love you. I don’t care anymore.”

Kakashi hums in delight, pulling out of you, your shared cum sticking to his own thighs now.

“You mean you’re all mine?” He knew the answer.

“Mmhmm… And I’m sorry about the way I was acting before…” You admitted, hands running in his hair.

Kakashi rested his face against your tits, his arms wrapped around your waist.

“What do you mean? I should be sorry. I shouldn’t have been such a scummy person to make you choose me or your career, especially when I knew how much you love it.” His voice was soft and somber, you kissed the crown on his head.

“We both messed up, yeah?” You slightly giggled.

“Yeah,” he laughed back. “If you’re sure about going into this war with me I want you to know something.” He picked his head up, towering over you again. His palm rested against your cheek as his eyes looked deep into yours.

“I don’t care who we’re facing or what we’re up against. I don’t care who’s getting hurt but I do know one thing,” His brows furrowed. “I’m not leaving your side once. I’ll cover you, I’ll fight for you, I swear I’ll kill for you- I already have and I will again if I have to.”

He softly kissed the tip of your nose.

“That goes for me too,” you sighed, one of your hands caressed his shoulder. He grabbed that hand and kissed the back of it, then pulled you off the bed.

You two got dressed, although you chose to change into a turtle neck, and went downstairs. The restaurant was more packed and there was chatter all around, the nerves you may have been heard upstairs disappearing completely.

Percy turned around when Kakashi approached the seat next to him and reclaimed his seat. You walked around the counter and began to wipe it down. Your father came out from behind the curtain that led to the kitchen.

“Here’s that sandwich,” Your dad said, handing your boyfriend the plated food. “Enjoy, son.”

“Son?” Kakashi asked, taking a look around to see if people were watching him. When the coast was clear he quickly lowered his mask for a bite, then put it back on.

Nobody could see the smile underneath he had while he chewed, but you noticed the crinkle underneath his eyes.

“Not bad,” Percy said, polishing off his meal. “What’d you think, Kakashi?”

“Yeah,” he looked up from his plate, watching as you walked around the restaurant, taking orders and handing out drinks. “It was good.” It tasted like home.

A/N: after a much needed break/hiatus i’m finally back RAAAAHHHHH !!!!!!! for everyone asking if i plan on continuing the mafia AU yes i do but i feel like it’ll be a small mini series.

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icyowl · 9 months ago

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Bluelock Cuddling headcanons

ft. Isagi, Chigiri, and Kunigami

Request: none

A/N: one of my racehorses won a race today so here’s a little gift to celebrate my good mood!

—————

Yoichi Isagi

the respectful kind

his favorite is half-cuddle — him on his back, you curled up into his side, head on his chest. Does his arm fall asleep? Absolutely. Will he stop? Never.

make his heart wobble any time you look up and about how much you like this — spending time with him, being close like this, knowing he cares about your opinion enough to ask so frequently for it.

Isagi is the kind that likes to cuddle the nights before a stressful thing. He gets to talk out his troubles and generally feel better about whatever anxieties he's got. Also, he genuinely seeks your life advice. He talks through his problems, that's who he is, and with you like this it feels like such a private time of vulnerability.

You habitually play with one another's fingers and hands. Usually it's sweet, but sometimes it devolves into thumb wars, arm wrestling, and even all out tickle battles. Sometimes he even lets you win

If he's lucky he can get you to fall asleep before he does. Reason? He likes watching you doze on him. Something about you falling asleep to the dip and rise of his chest makes him all giddy and humble at the same time.

Inevitably someone walks in on you two only to be greeted with the terror-inducing glare he pins them down with. Wake you up and they are not long for this world.

Hyoma Chigiri

the timid kind

go-to is the traditional spoon. It means you don't have to look at him and whatever embarrassment he's gotta be showing while being this close to you.

As time goes on, he starts to get almost too comfortable with it. On the phone? Playing a game? Fuckin' doing laundry? Doesn't matter. When he's lying on any bed or couch, there is a distinct bubble of space, and if you invade the bubble, you're within striking distance. His arms are nearly as fast as his legs. Chigiri will latch onto you, will pull you in, and will interrupt whatever it is you wanted to do so he can spoon you.

Rub his hand or intertwine fingers while he's got an arm draped over you and he is GONE

There have been times when he's pushed you away, and though it makes sense — he's always been the kind to close himself off, turn vile and harsh when he's hurting — it breaks you. When you're both ready to reconcile, somehow it ends with your back to his chest, his legs mixed with yours, and his warm hand holding you snug to his body.

Also likes this position because it lets him nuzzle in right on the wispy hairs at the bottom of your neck or the big vein on the side.

Turn the tables on him by flipping over in his grip and facing him head-on. It's also a nice way to get even closer to him when you've had a bad day. A kind of haven can be found in nestling under his chin. He's alright with this — it means you can't see his face and the obvious love-sick tint to his eyes.

Rensuke Kunigami

the kind that doesn't know his own strength

best likes the space-saver, aka, one person laying on top of the other. Boy doesn't care which of you is on top. He likes supporting your body or you supporting his — something about being the other person's strength makes the back of his head tingle.

first time he lays on you, he doesn't check his weight at all, just flops down. Immediately thinks he's broken you when you squeak. After that he's almost too wary about hurting you. Am I too heavy? Can you breathe okay? Do I need to get up? You can get on top if you want. Relax Kunigami, just don't fall from orbit and you'll be fine.

Icing on the cake is when you play with his hair. Dude could be angry as an ox, ready to rip someone in half, and two minutes of your fingers in his hair has him fighting to stay awake and spend time with you. What was he angry about again?

One time you fell asleep on his chest, all blissed out and comfy, only to wake up in a shiny puddle of your own drool. You were, understandably, mortified, but the embarrassment turns to affection when he casually disregards the whole thing: it's just a shirt, it'll dry.

You figured you repaid the favor when several weeks later he was one on top of you, head burrowed unceremoniously into your stomach, arms underneath your back, refusing to look up or speak. The reason revealed itself when he finally met your eyes.

Tears. Tiny sniffs too. Four words: I failed my team. That was all he said before digging his face back into your skin. It took time, and a lot of encouragement, but he did eventually snap out of the funk and even apologized for messing up your clothes. It'll dry, you said, and you shared a little snicker.

#isagi x reader #chigiri x reader #kunigami x reader #bluelock x reader #cuddling headcanons #fluff

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seullovesme · 8 months ago

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when you can't sleep » kang seulgi

pairing ⥬ seulgi x reader

genre ⥬ fluff

summary ⥬ you struggle to fall asleep, which seulgi has just the solution

warnings ⥬ anxiety attack (i couldn't sleep and this is all based on how i felt just a moment ago

WC ⥬ 0.5k+

you tossed and turned for what felt like hours, but when you checked the time, only thirty minutes had passed. you settled on laying on your back, looking straight at the ceiling. you were starting to get frustrated. on a typical night, you’d sleep like a baby beside your girlfriend, but something was so off that you didn’t get a wink of rest.

it was already 3:25 am, not to mention that you already had a long day coming up. you needed that sleep. you switched positions a million times, got up to drink water and splashed some on your face, walked around your room trying to ease your mind, but nothing seemed to work. it was to the point where you felt like crying.

during all of this, seulgi slept peacefully on her side of the bed, softly snoring. you didn’t want to wake her, so you were very careful when getting up out of bed even though she could probably sleep through an earthquake. at least one of you was getting sleep, right?

you felt like the world was collapsing in on you as you started to panic, the feeling of being so uncomfortable no matter how hard you try to fix it starts making you feel sick. your skin felt like it was burning and you started to sweat. you got up and out of the sheets, your chest heaving as you try to calm yourself down before you woke up the resting bear, but it was already too late. she had woken up when you stood up so distraught, the sudden shift and loud breathing startling her awake.

you put your hand on your chest to stop your heart from beating out of your chest, the tears in your eyes falling uncontrollably. seulgi rushed to your side and rubbed her palm on your back, still groggy. with her shushing you gently and patting your back, you slowly return to your normal state where you aren’t having an anxiety attack.

“seul, i’m sorry.” you whisper, sniffling as you scan her figure in her pajamas with her messy bed hair. “i didn’t mean to wake you up.” you explain. she just clicks her tongue and shakes her head, bringing you into a bear hug.

“shhh, i’m not upset, love. i just want to know what’s wrong.” she says as she lets go of you to put her hands on both of your cheeks, inspecting your eyes as best as she could with just the moonlight as her source of lighting. she could see the restlessness in your eyes.

you frown, “i can’t sleep. i’ve been trying to sleep for the past three hours and i was getting so angry and frustrated that i got overwhelmed by the unsettling feeling.” her heart broke hearing that.

“awe, you know you could’ve woken me up, right? do you want me to put you to sleep, baby?” she asked to which you nodded. she held your hand and let you get in bed first, laying on top of you once you got cozied up. “just focus on my breathing.” you listened to her and just paid attention to how her chest rose and fell against yours. eventually, you synced your breathing to hers which helped you feel sleepy.

within ten minutes, you were already asleep thanks to your girlfriend’s help. she smiled once she heard your even breaths, closing her eyes to sleep as well, your body warmth so soothing for her. you completed each other, down to your sleeping habits.

#seullovesme » posted!#seulgi x reader #seulgi #seulgi red velvet #kang seulgi #red velvet x reader #red velvet #red velvet fic #kpop #kpop imagines #kpop fanfic

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crows-of-buckets · 10 months ago

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Edelgard was 18.

Edelgard was 18 and held the entirety of her future in her hands. She was 18 and alone, 18 and scared, 18 and angry.

Edelgard was 18 sitting at a desk. Her desk. The walls of her room at the officers academy felt just as much protection as they did a cage at that moment. The wooden floors creaked under the weight of her chair.

Tomorrow things would change. Her and Hubert would walk alone, and together they would face down former friends turned foes as they carved their bloody path.

They would face the professor.

Edelgard leaned back, tears blurring her vision. She was doing her homework. Why was she doing her homework? Tomorrow in the holy tomb she would plunge Fodlan into a war the likes of which no one had seen in centuries. Homework was the least of her concerns.

She would have to face the professor.

Byleth, the stone faced mercenary who threw herself in front of Edelgard with no hesitation. Byleth, who spent hours carefully guiding her students to their fullest potential. Byleth, who sometimes got pale in battle after a particularly rough fight. Not because she feared her own safety, but because she feared that any of her students had received more than a scratch. Byleth, who patiently let Edelgard explain her nightmares. Byleth, who watched her be crowned Emperor of Adrestia.

The first person in a long time that Edelgard truly cared about.

She had tried so hard to avoid harboring any affection for her professor - for any of the residents at garreg mach. And yet the ashen demon had carved a place into her heart, dragging her students to reside there alongside her. Edelgard felt her throat tighten at the thought of raising her blade at Dorothea- at Ferdinand, at Caspar, at Linhardt, at Bernadetta, at Petra. Over the past few months their antics had grown on her, and now guilt lumped in her throat. She would turn her blades onto them, her kind and slightly stupid classmates. They would follow Byleth, and Byleth would follow the Church.

It made her feel sick.

Long past the point of caring about her homework, Edelgard walked over to her dresser. Flowers- mostly from the professor- were starting to shrivel in their vases. How poetic, she thought that they too shall die the last night I am an ally to those I hold dear. She plucked a flower from the vase- a single rose- and sat on the bed.

There was no point in trying to sleep. Anticipation and anxiety coursed through her. Tomorrow she would have to be a different woman. No longer Edelgard, the imperial princess of Adrestia. No longer Edelgard, the flame emperor, or Edelgard, house leader of the black eagles.

Tomorrow, she would be Edelgard, Emperor of Adrestia, the woman who tore the land from it's fragile peace for the sake of her own ideals.

She pulled her legs up, laying her head on her knees.

There would be no sleep tonight. For Edelgard was 18, and she had a world to change.

Whether it be by herself, or with allies at her back, the Emperor of Adrestia had work to do.

#edelgard #edelgard von hresvelg #fuck it im posting this #fe3h #edelgard fire emblem #fire emblem edelgard #fire emblem 3h #fire emblem three houses #black eagles fe3h #black eagles #please dont judge too hard okay i don't write a lot #i also wrote this when i was doing horrible mentally #being 18 fucked with me so hard i felt like an awful person for exsisting #im doing better now but like. this is not just a character study i was throwing myself onto the page lmao #my fic

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arogustus · 28 days ago

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Fictober 2024: Splatband Edition

Fandom - Splatoon - Mention of Alcohol

16. No, I'm not ok.

Beika always thought of Ink Theory as snobby. Their music had a respectably chaotic vibe to it, but tinged with that heavy pretentiousness you could only get from people with money to spend on higher education and fancy perfumes. To find one of them in dirty, lowbrow rough and tumble Splatsville was unlikely.

But not only did she actually find one of them here at a bar, she was also, very clearly, drunk off her ass.

“-and you wanna know what she says, you wanna know what she says to me? Wanna know it?” The woman, Yoko as she could tell by that recognizably kaleidoscopic head of hair (though devoid of a hat, exposing a very messy patch of gray on top), slurred her words as she spoke. “She says “I’m too much!” Me! Too much!”

“That’s crazy.” Beika deadpanned. She wanted to just antagonize her for a bit, but the woman was clearly an angry drunk venting her frustrations with the world at anyone who would listen. She took that seat without thinking, and now she couldn’t sway the woman away.

“‘Cept she’s right!” Her drink spilled out of her glass onto Beika’s nose, Yoko thrusting it in front of her as she went off on another tangent. “My mom always said, she said, “Yoko, you’re such a handful”, cause I get sick a lot, and nervous and suffer anxiety attacks and have to sleep a lot and get snotty when it’s below- below 20. I always got that.”

“Uhuh.”

“But Karen, Karen, Karen…” She takes another swig, draining her cup. “Karen has the GAL to tell me that when she’s just as high maintenance as I am! She can’t tell me that!”

“What a bitch.” Beika grumbled.

She flinched when Yoko turned at her with pure fury in her eyes. They widened further than she had ever expected, boring into her very soul. “Don’t. Call her. That.”

Beika swallowed a lump in her throat. Something in her, the smart part of her, told her that pushing this woman too far would probably end bad for her. An angry gal was not someone anyone wanted to mess with.

Yoko seemed to forget the insult, now swerving to a different tangent. “Karen’s too good to be a bitch. She’s nice, she always keeps an eye out on us, and she brews this herbal tea that helps clear my migraines and calms me down when my anxiety flares up, and… and…”

Tears welled up in her eyes, before she suddenly began wailing loudly, head in her hands, for all the world to see. Not that anyone in the bar cared, other than her. Because then the inkling fell onto Beika’s chest, grabbing onto her shirt to keep her close as she fell in despair.

She really should not have tried to antagonize her.

“AND I LOST HER! I HAD THE KINDEST, PRETTIEST GIRL IN THE WORLD AND I MADE HER HATE ME!” She cried out, before just as suddenly quieting down, now in a hushed whisper. “I really am too much.”

Beika could only pat her awkwardly on the back. There was pity in her eyes, coming from someone who knew heartbreak like that. “Are, uh, are you ok?”

Yoko sniffled. She was getting snot all over her shirt. “No, I’m not ok.”

Beika bit her lip, looking around before deciding to hug her back. “Hey, look, just forget about her. Focus on yourself, you know.” That was advice she was famously known for.

Yoko sobbed. “I don’t want to.”

#splatoon #fictober24 #splatbands #c-side #beika #ink theory #yoko #prompts #my work

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yummycrummy · 6 months ago

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p1 hcs becuz I am normal abt characters

-his real name is Rick but he prefers to go by Dude (I like to think that p2's name is Rick too but we aren't talking abt him rn)

-in his 20s (like...26 or 28???) he looks older to some people though, if he even goes out

-has severe generalised anxiety disorder, PTSD, hypochondria, schizophrenia, social anxiety, and OCD

- has Anthropophobia, Ataxophobia, Catagelophobia, Claustrophobia, Daemonophobia, and probably way more

-started to take medication at some point but eventually stopped because he thought they wouldn't work and make him more paranoid

-he owns guns (A LOT of them) probably like, 25. he keeps them perfectly clean and safe, stocked up on his wall or in his panic room. (we'll get to that part soon) he'd probably have a collection of other weapons too, like a bunch of knives and axes (he also keeps them very clean, obsessively)

-owns a little radio so he can listen to MTV, music that he's into, like Nickelback, KMFDM, Judas Priest, Oingo Boingo and Black Sabbath. helps him relax when he feels like he's really losing it. (he also tries to listen in on the feds, like if they're spying on him. he's that paranoid.)

-cuddles with champ often. especially when hes in bed. he loves that puppy as much as life itself (he'd kill for him)

-gets sunspots when hes out in the sun for awhile 🌤

-smokes pot frequently. his house probably reeks of it, and so does he lets be real

-smoking too much of the pot can fuck him up, yet he doesn't stop. he doesn't know what else to do, and he doesn't trust doctors.

-fidgets alot. holds onto his cross when hes scared or in need of comfort. bites his nails too.

-has acne scars

-sensitive to bright lights (why he wears sunglasses all the time)

-gets sick really often. all the time. almost died during a few probably

-has shit posture 🦐

-breaks things when hes overwhelmed or angry

-has a bunker/panic room in his basement. keeps way more weapons down there, including MRE's and dog food as well. he thinks about the world coming to an end and so that's basically why he built it.

-hardly ever leaves his house. feels like the government is going to come for him, so whenever he sees a black vehicle outside, like a van, he freaks the hell out. If he was going to go out and get the mail that day you can forget it.

-cant hold down a job for long. Idk how this man even has a house (government probably gives him money) that is until he eventually gets evicted (hope this makes sense enough im sleepy)

-can't drive even though he took his learners as a teen. he just can't. makes him more nervous and unable to focus on a lot of things at once, so he either walks or takes the bus.

-kids would often call him a demon or pull his hair. they thought he was a freak since he never liked to be around any of the other kids, he was always off in some corner or inside at recess, so he was sadly the target of their taunts.

-his parents weren't redheads like him (recessive genes) so when he was born his mother thought he was the spawn of the devil. she never wanted anything to do with him, as did his dad, so P1 desperately tried everything to get their attention/approval, but nothing ever worked. he eventually left home when he turned 17.

k thats mostly it ty for reading if u did eee

#ig my vers of him but idk #uhm...yyeah uh #its alot im srry i love comin up with hcs for characters #headcanons #p1 dude #postal 1997 #postal dude #tw abuse #tw drug mention

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thewhumpcaretaker · 6 months ago

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Hihii! I have a little different question, I hope I'm not too weird...

Since I'm working on the sequel for The Other Side Of Paradise that you read and know that it's a/b/o... and you gave me one cute ask on this theme. About how John would take care of mpreg Santino and I loved it because absolutely John is doing anything for him. Do you have any more scenarios for that? When Santino actually tells him that and starts to get those mood swings and cravings. How more moody and needy can Santino get bahaha? I'm just curious on how do you see them and do you think they would actually kinda be scared of becoming parents?

Have a lovely day!! 💙💖

Hiiii!! Thank you for the ask 💝🖤 As usual, you're only as weird as I am, heehee. Thanks for your patience on this one - I had a ton going on during the past couple days.

There's always a new level of moodiness and neediness that can be reached - let's make Santino suffer and then be treated with so much love!

TW: mpreg scenarios

John would actually not be too scared of becoming a parent - he feels like he was made for that and has always wanted a family. He has so much love to give and that would extend to having a child. He'd read fairy tales to the baby while Santino is still pregnant and talk to them about the wonderful they'll have. But he would be scared of what could happen to that kid and what kind of life they'll lead under the High Table. He'd get paranoid over the baby's safety and how they could be used against him in the future, just like Caine's daughter was used against him. I think he'd try to keep the pregnancy a secret as long as possible. And he would worry a lot about how to ensure that this child grows up to have a normal life.

Meanwhile, Santino is the one who'd be very scared of becoming a parent. He'd think about how his own parents treated him and realize that he didn't really have a good role model for parenting. He'd be especially worried that he might lose his temper with the kid, which he doesn't want at all. He would feel so unprepared and have major anxiety about that. Of course, John would constantly reassure him that he'll be a good dad and remind him how sweet he is to Dog already.

Santino would also struggle a lot with how his body would change during the pregnancy. Being more tired, being sore and unable to walk well, feeling sick and having cravings - all of it would make him feel so stressed and out of control. It would take him away from his work, and at first, he'd ignore all of it and try to push through to keep working. But for once, he couldn't ignore his own health without putting the baby at risk too. Normally, he takes out a lot of his anger on himself and he can't do that anymore, which is beautiful in a way but also completely confusing. He'd definitely have a breakdown over that at some point. But after that, he'd start accepting help from John, and would switch from pushing him away to clinging to his side at all times, not even wanting him to leave the room.

John would try to make things easier for him by explaining that this is a time when he needs to focus on staying healthy and relaxing, and that everything will be waiting for him when he comes back. He'd tell him that it's okay to be frustrated and angry with the situation, and would listen any time Santino needs to rant about everything he's missing out on and how scared he feels. And John would be doing everything possible for him - bringing him any food he wants, making sure he doesn't have to walk long distances, making sure he gets to see the best doctors in the world, all of that. He'd give him massages every day and wouldn't want to spend even a second away from him. John would also be insanely physically protective of Santino during this time.

Santino would also try to help John by considering long term changes to make John feel better about whether their lives are headed. He'd pull back from his work with the Camorra and maybe even consider running away or retiring. But that isn't what he wants to do. It makes him question what it means to be successful and whether he can work and have a child at the same time (I might be slightly enjoying the thought of a man having this dilemma, which isn't so common...). It's a lot to think about, and it weighs heavily on both of them. But at least it comes from the fact that they're making a whole new life together!

It's hard to say what they would decide to do. I guess we'll find out in your fic!! I'm very excited!!!

#john x santino #john wick a/b/o #santino d'antonio #john wick alpha #santino d'antonio omega #santino d'antonio mpreg

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twoidiotwriters1 · 6 months ago

Text

The Curse of Oenone (Leo Valdez xFem!Oc)

A/N: I'm tired of getting sick every month before getting my period why does God hate women -Danny Words: 2,621 Series' Masterlist Previous Chapter // Next Chapter Listen to: 'Smoke And Mirrors' -by Imagine Dragons

LIII: Ask Me Again When I'm Mentally Stable

Letting Percy and Leo go together on a mission without her supervision gives her so much anxiety. Her boyfriend and her brother get along, Percy hasn't said much, but he's probably going to support Leo's idea because he's insane like that. Loyalty is his fatal flaw and everything...

Ara can't relate, she does what she can to help her friends, yes, but at the same time, when the strain of holding onto someone isn't worth it, she relaxes her grip. Leo used to be like that: escaping foster homes, keeping everyone at arm's length—it was only when Ara showed up that he started to have trouble letting go.

"Stop," Jason captures her hand and pulls it away from her forehead. "You'll end up drawing blood."

"I'm anxious and there's nothing to fix..." She glances at the smoke rising from his injury. "Unless I count you as one of my broken toys. Juno said the wound affects your spirit—if you let me try my empath touch..."

"I have to heal myself."

"And you decide to take it as some test?" Ara raises a brow. "Gods, will you ever stop being so Roman?"

Jason smiles. "I think that's literally the problem."

"Ah, so this is another identity crisis?" Ara crosses her arms. "You go through those way too often."

"You and Leo are insufferable," Jason rolls his eyes. "You push people's buttons so we focus on being angry at you instead of your problems."

"Listen, ever since Rome was founded you guys have desperately tried to be like us, so in my opinion, you're the most Roman fella that's ever lived in the last century, I don't see what the fuss is about."

"You're the youngest child of Olympus that's ever existed, the youngest General, and that makes you twice as scary. I know it's easier said than done, but you should follow Eros's advice and—"

"You're currently dying and you're trying to tell me how to live?"

Jason doesn't yield. "You taught me that no one but me gets to decide who I am—you declared yourself daughter of Olympus, so why are you acting like Leo won't make it? Now it's not the time to question willpower."

Ara and Jason hold a staring competition, but Jason's got that stupid wolfish glare, so she can't outdo him. She turns and faces the skyline before her.

"When it was just my life I was handling, it was easy to say that stuff. But I found out stubbornness has messed up multiple lifetimes... Leo's life is on the line, I can't lie just to make myself feel better."

"Who says it's a lie?"

"I can't hold the curse to my way of perceiving the world," she says irritatedly. "Leo's idea is very romantic, but he's not considering the effort it'll take to defeat Gaea, he's underestimating the situation."

"Leo is smarter than that," Jason reasons. "And you know that."

Ara groans. "Wits are nothing if you have nowhere to put them. He doesn't have a solid plan, and the curse is clear: He can't save himself."

"Yeah, and he's not trying to," Jason replies. "He's going to save Calypso and you instead."

Ara hears a thump followed by muffled screams at the other end of the trireme. "Stay here."

"Did you tell Leo about our fighting style?" Percy asks while Frank and Leo take Nike downstairs.

"What?"

"When we were about to fight he said 'I distract, you attack'."

Ara starts going downstairs to look at the goddess. "It doesn't surprise me. Leo's always been more comfortable being a distraction."

Percy follows her. "You two are more similar than I thought. Or he's really similar to who you used to be—"

"Yeah, yeah, I've changed," Ara says grumpily. "Save it."

"No—wait," Percy catches her wrist and stops her. "You have changed, and I thought it was something bad, but not anymore."

"What is your point, Percy?" She presses.

"You grew up," he continues. "And it sucks that I couldn't be there to help you, but it had to be this way. After Bianca, I didn't want you out of sight," his hand remains around her wrist, and Ara can feel his angst. "When Beckendorf died, I thought you hated me, and then Mike died and I... I thought you wanted to get away from me. I got scared and confused, but while I was in Tartarus—"

"You don't have to talk about it—"

"While I was in Tartarus," he insists. "We ran into a herd of arai. The more we slayed, the more curses fell upon me and Annabeth, it was probably one of the scariest moments of my life, but what they say about you in camp, they don't know what they're talking about. You're powerful and resourceful, and they're afraid of that. I was too, but that doesn't make you bad. I'm sorry."

Ara pouts and pulls Percy into a tight hug. "Thank you."

"I want you to be safe," he says, voice muffled by the hug. "I know it's absurd, but you're my little sister. If something bad ever happened to you..."

"I'm sorry too. I knew you loved me, but there was a second voice telling me I didn't matter and I was jealous of how things were just given to you, even if I knew they came at a high price..."

"We used to tell each other everything," he looks down at her. "What happened?"

Ara ponders his question. "You can make mistakes, but in front of your family?" Ara swallows the lump in her throat. "It's like twisting a blade in your gut. We stepped out so we wouldn't bleed in front of each other."

Leo's voice comes from downstairs. "Sunshine, come meet our new buddy!"

Percy clears his throat. "You should go... You and Leo should talk to her."

"You gagged a goddess."

"What you're trying to say is 'Oh my gods, thank you so much for bringing Nike so she can help my hot boyfriend!'," Leo says tauntingly.

"Oh my gods, you guys, thank you for disrespecting another goddess!" Ara replies sarcastically. "Can someone explain the gag?"

"She threatened to curse us," Frank shrugs. "Considering three out of the four people present were already dealing with curses, we decided not to risk it."

Ara crouches next to the goddess. "Lady Nike, I'll take off the gag if you promise not to curse us, yes?"

"Wait," Leo stops her. "Before you do that, there's something you should know."

Ara pulls her hand back and scowls. "What is it? Is her spit deadly or something?"

"She said one of us has to die to defeat Gaea, that it's destined to be that way," Frank says tensely. "Leo believes it's him and... at this point, it makes sense."

"She also said there's a way to defeat death," Leo's eyes are shining. "The Physician's Cure. Ever heard of it?"

Nothing comes to mind. Ara shakes her head. "Is she willing to share more on that?"

"Well, she mentioned a few things—poison, a god's heartbeat, and the curse of Delos..."

Ara raises a brow. "That's where Artemis and Apollo were born." Leo smirks, pleased with how things are lining up to match his plan. "Don't look so proud, the goddess of victory just said you're a prescribed loser."

"I wear the title as a badge of honor," Leo looks at Nike and nods. "Alright, take the gag off."

"I'll gather the others," Frank tells them. "Let's hold a meeting in an hour? So you can tell us what Nike said."

"Yeah, big guy—thank you," Leo pats his shoulder amicably.

"Stop thanking us, we're planning your death," Frank scolds him.

Ara waves him off. "Don't waste your breath, he enjoys being a martyr."

"You bet I do! Finally, people give me the prince treatment I deserve!"

"Get out of here before you become a murder witness," Ara warns Frank.

"My eyes are closed, General," Frank turns and leaves the stables.

The girl seizes a corner of the tape over the goddess's mouth. "If you place a curse on us, I'll dismantle your wings and use them to rebuild my bronze dragon. Got it?"

The goddess nods, and so Ara removes the tape. Nike complains dramatically, but she doesn't curse them, mostly because she's too busy staring at Ara with hungry eyes. "Daughter of Olympus," the words are like honey in her mouth. "My Greek champion, I'll grant you answers."

"Thank you," Ara says politely. "Tell me about the Physician's Cure."

Nike responds heatedly. "It's a cheap trick. People who die are losers, they shouldn't get a second chance."

"Understandable," she continues patiently. "But you told them that to defeat Gaea, Leo must die. If he dies, then Leo would've won, right? He'd have a right to a reward."

Nike ponders. "Well..."

"Without Leo's death, there would be no victory," Ara continues with charmspeak. "He deserves to come back. It's a big war—bigger than the one my brother and I fought against Kronos. Wouldn't you like to have another Greek champion?"

"That would be nice..." Nike's eyes glisten with longing.

"Wouldn't that be the ultimate victory, defeating death?"

"Maybe," the goddess's eye twitches. "Yes."

"We'll get you that milestone," Ara says earnestly.

Nike stares at Leo like she can't wait to carve him into the perfect shape. "You'll be my new champion, Leo Valdez?"

"Absolutely," he smiles confidently. "I was born to win."

The minute her consciousness slips into dreamland, Nico Di Angelo pops into view and grabs her shoulder. "You should see this." Ara gets yanked into his dream, standing in the middle of the rec room. "This is from the latest meeting," Nico glares at the teenagers. "You'll love it."

"...Something's wrong."

Jake Mason clears his throat. "Probably this Roman dirt-wipe who's leading the attack—Octavian what's-his-name. If I was Apollo and my descendant was acting that way, I'd go into hiding out of shame."

"I agree," Will sighs. "I wish I was a better archer... I wouldn't mind shooting my Roman relative off his high horse. Actually, I wish I could use any of my father's gifts to stop this war... Unfortunately, I'm just a healer."

"Your talents are essential," Chiron tells him. "I fear we'll need them soon enough. As for seeing the future... what about the harpy Ella? Has she offered any advice from the Sibylline Books?"

"The poor thing is scared out of her wits," Rachel makes a face. "Harpies hate being imprisoned. Ever since the Romans surrounded us... well, she feels trapped. She knows Octavian means to capture her. It's all Tyson and I can do to keep her from flying away."

"Which would be suicide." Butch, son of Iris, grumbles. "With those Roman eagles in the air, flying isn't safe. I've already lost two pegasi."

"At least Tyson brought some of his Cyclops friends to help out," Rachel offers. "That's a little good news."

"A dozen full-grown Cyclopes? That's a lot of good news!" Connor laughs, he's seated next to Lily. "Plus, Lou Ellen and the Hecate kids have been putting up magic barriers, and the whole Hermes cabin has been lining the hills with traps and snares and all kinds of nice surprises for the Romans!"

Jake glares at him. "Most of which you stole from Bunker Nine and the Hephaestus cabin."

"They even stole the landmines from around the Ares cabin," Clarisse complains. "How do you steal live landmines?"

"We commandeered them for the war effort." Connor eats a handful of salt crackers, probably stolen from Jake's secret stash too. "You guys have plenty of toys, you can share! Ara would want you to."

That shuts up Jake and Clarisse. Chiron takes advantage of it. "Grover? What news from the nature spirits?"

"Even on a good day, it's hard to organize nymphs and dryads," Grover looks exhausted. "With Gaia stirring, they're almost as disoriented as the gods. Katie and Miranda from the Demeter cabin are out there right now trying to help, but if the Earth Mother wakes... Well, I can't promise the woods will be safe. Or the hills. Or the strawberry fields. Or—"

"Great." Jake looks at Clovis and shakes him a bit when he starts to close his eyes. "So what do we do?"

"Attack!" Clarisse says, making everyone jump. "The Romans are getting more reinforcements by the day. We know they plan to invade on August first. Why should we let them set the timetable? I can only guess they're waiting to gather more forces. They already outnumber us. We should attack now, before they get any stronger; take the fight to them!"

Lily looks at her brother, asking him to speak as the Athena counselor. "Clarisse, I get your point. But have you studied Roman engineering? Their temporary camp is better defended than Camp Half-Blood. Attack them at their base, and we'd be massacred."

"So we just wait? Let them get all their forces prepared while Gaia gets closer to waking? I have Coach Hedge's pregnant wife under my protection. I am not going to let anything happen to her. I owe Hedge my life. Besides, I've been training the campers more than you have, Malcolm. Their morale is low. Everybody is scared. If we're under siege another nine days—"

"We should stick to Annabeth's plan." Connor tries to control Clarisse's frustration. "We have to hold out until she gets that magic Athena statue back here."

"You mean if that Roman praetor gets the statue back here," Clarisse scoffs. "I don't understand what Annabeth was thinking, collaborating with the enemy. Even if the Roman manages to bring us the statue—which is impossible—we're supposed to trust that will bring peace? The statue arrives and suddenly the Romans lay down their weapons and start dancing around, throwing flowers? Ara once gave me crap for not standing on business, and I won't disappoint her a second time."

"Don't hold onto the stuff she said before becoming a General," Lily speaks at last. "We haven't heard from her in a month—"

"Are you suggesting we listen to you?" Clarisse snaps. "For that to happen, you'd need to speak up, Saggio."

Lily's cheeks flush. "Well, isn't that what I'm doing? I know none of you believe Ara is the camp's curse, but I also know some of you are blinded by your personal history with her—"

"Mostly you..." Jake mumbles.

Lily's voice gets a little drier. "I might've argued with Ara but I'm still second in command. I think it nonsensical to consider what she'd do when she's not here—she won't be here on time to deal with this, so we should be thinking for ourselves. I agree with Clarisse, that statue might not fix things..."

She looks at the older girl, Lily is one of the few people Clarisse treats like a fighter of her range, which sometimes can be funny, considering Lily barely reaches her shoulder.

"But we won't attack. Throwing the first punch is never a good idea, and Romans are A-class bullies who know fear is the best tool for prompt subjugation, don't let them trick you into digging our grave."

Clarisse scrutinizes Lily as if searching for the best area to stab her, but eventually, she gives in. "Birdy and I go a long way back, I do not want to fail her like I failed her sister... If you think this is the way..."

Rachel leans forward. "Annabeth and Ara know what they're doing. We have to try for peace. Unless we can unite the Greeks and Romans, the gods won't be healed. Unless the gods are healed, there's no way we can kill the giants. And unless we kill the giants—"

"Gaia wakes," Connor makes a face. "Game over. Look, Clarisse, Annabeth sent me a message from Tartarus. From fricking Tartarus. Anybody who can do that... hey, I listen to them."

"And let's not forget that in Lily's latest dream, Ara was fighting three immortals at once—and she was winning," Jake raises a brow. "If stalling gives her time to come back and end this, then heck, I'm nothing but stale."

Lily frowns. "That's... not the best analogy, but thank you, Jake." The girl shows him a brief smile that doesn't go unnoticed by Connor, who glares at Jake as he stuffs more salt crackers in his mouth.

Next Chapter –>

Taglist.

@siriuslysirius1107 @ask-giggles1303 @im-planning-something-look @bandshirts-andbooks @coolninjapaper @thewaterlily @whenisthefall @1randomcomic @you-bloody-shank @sunflowergraves @owlalex44 @taylordaughter @typicalsolangelolover @writingmia @espressopatronum454 @slytherinnqueen @orbitingpolaris @obxstiles @ellipsisspelled @thepixiechicksh @ebony-reine-vibes

#twoidiots writing #pjo fanfic #leo valdez fanfic #doo #leo valdez x oc #heroes of olympus #percy jackson and the olympians

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worstutfanonthingpoll · 2 years ago

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Hey babygirls, poll is on hiatus because I just got back from italy and i am so so so so so so so so so so very very tired.

Instead, have a list of all my Undertale Aus!

Fishdings

TECtale

Underswitch

Doki Doki Monster Club

Underflame

Blankstatale

Fishdings

If you don't know this one by now you have not been here long. Here's the link to the account:

TECtale

So you know the early fanon version of undertale? Evil Chara, OP Sans, UWU Papyrus? Yeah, that's kind of what it is.

Basically, Sans (a genius scientist, ofc) and Frisk (a nineteen year old girl and his gf) decide to banish The Evil Chara (TEC) to another universe. They succeed, but TEC resets the timeline as they do it.

TEC ends up in the canon UT universe, where she (gender up to interpretation) is reduced to an angry narrator. Like that one "what do you want" "souls of the unliving" "a bagel" "nooo" meme. She is still convinced she's making you kill everyone, and even if you only kill a single Froggit she will remain convinced it's bc she's controlling you. At the end of the pacifst run, you get this dialogue:

(Art by worst ut canon)

Meanwhile, Canon Chara was sent to the fanon universe. It is literally Hell. Their mother is hypersexualised, their brother is a tsundere, the child they follow around and narrate about how has boobs, and worst of all said child is convinced they're making her kill everyone!

Once Frisk gets to Snowdin (after killing everyone in the ruins) she warps off to Sans' house with the man himself, leaving Chara to explore the underground on their own. Strangely enough, the world seems to be... glitching out? Monsters will talk about how their heads feel foggy or how they don't even know why they hate Sans so much and then glitch into a loop of "I hate Sans I hate Sans I hate Sans"

Is it something to do with those garbage noises that seem to constantly be playing with the music? Hopefully Chara can find out... before it's too late.

Underswitch

Literally just a common or garden roleswap, nothing special. Swaps are as follows:

Toriel ~ Gaster (a white fire elemental here)

Asgore ~ Grillby

Sans ~ Napstablook

Papyrus ~ Alphys ~ Mad Mew Mew (three way swap)

Undyne ~ Mettaton

Frisk ~ Human from the first image in the prologue

Chara ~ That one alt design

Monster Kid ~ Heats Flamesman

Asriel ~ Fuku Fire

Burgerpants ~ So Sorry

All the Blooks are cat people and cousins.

Papyton real, is the date storyline.

Alphys was Timid Dummy, and then Rar Rar Scratchy Clawy, a violent anime dinosaur sk8er.

Metta is captain of the royal guard and has a ponytail. Maddy wants to join but he fears she will kill everyone accidentally due to her incredible violence.

Undyne has several violent tv shows and movies. You shoot her legs off first and she's like "who needs legs... with arms like these?!" and starts suplexing shit.

Napsta makes sick beats and has anxiety, but is great at pretending they don't. They are incredibly popular. They still live in constant fear.

Sans records stupid jokes and never lets people hear em. He and the other ghosts aren't related.

Speaking of that last point, Alphys and Undyne are exes. Undyne abandoned her and Sans for the Hollywood dream. They probably get back together post pacifist.

Heats Flamesman is a child. He likes Metta because everyone knows his name. He aspires to be like that some day.

Monster Kid wants you to believe in them. If you don't they will be traumatised. If you do, they will be so shocked you did, they will be traumatised anyway.

Doki Doki Monster Club

Co created with my good friends @sans-au-war-ii and @bestfictionaldivorce.

The girls (™) are:

So-Sorryori

Grillbyuri

Natsundyne

Mewnica

It's pretty damn obviously who's who. The only thing of relevance I can think of to mention is that Grillbyuri is obsessed with water (not knives) and instead of stabbing himself he pours water on himself. Instead of watching his corpse decay for three days, you watch him slowly evaporate over three days.

And everyone wears a skirt.

Art by sans au war!

Underflame

Epic Au where Frisk gets blasted by Toriel's fire magic and their soul's like "not today satan" and turns upside-down and Frisk becomes a fire monster.

Sansby real, and they adopt Frisk. They call them Dad and Also Dad. Fuku is their cousin now, and Heats Flamesman is their weird tiny uncle.

Anyway, worst ut canon wrote this oneshot for it read it right now pls

Blankstatale

First off, Blankstablook is an oc of mine of sorts. They're the ghost possessing the ruins dummy and they live there to avoid the sheer chaos that comes from living in the same vicinity of its cousins.

Anyway, resets don't exist and the player is the opposite of an alpha gamer and gets wiped out by the first Froggit they encounter after Toriel skedaddles. Blanksta feels bad for them (and for Toriel, she'll only blame herself) and so decides to possess them.

It ties the soul around their neck with Frisk's bandages, and proceeds. They do an awful job at pretending to be an alive child. It floats two feet off the ground the whole time, while the soul flails around trying to kill.

They also just generally act like an eldrich abomination and freak the shit out of everyone. Except their cousins. Who are just like "man, classic Blanksta"

Oh yeah and being a ghost they can't take damage which makes fights both very interesting and incredibly hilarious.

Heres Blanksta!Frisk:

(Art by me for once lol)

Yeah that's it really. Feel free to ask about any of the Aus in my askbox! Also I will take drawing prompts for them, as long as they're sfw :)

#undertale aus #worst ut fanon thing poll #undertale au art #undertale #fishdings #TECtale #underswitch #doki doki monster club #ddmc #underflame #blankstatale

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alexandervangogh · 8 months ago

Text

Crimson Threads of Redemption

I'm currently working on a psychological horror that's supposed to have tones of philosophy and allegory that I hold really dear to me! To give it a very vague summary, it's two very unstable teenage boys find themselves chewed up and left to the curb by the world's cruelties, and lean into each other for closure. I try to go for a poetic and abstract style that's very indistinctive and metaphorical!! I'm planning to post little drafts I have because a friend of mine suggested it! I'm going to show you the first page so far, but before I do, please mind the sensitivity warnings!! It covers very touchy topics of the following,

Dark depressing settings

Religious trauma

Swearing, slurs

Self harm, suicide, suicidal thoughts and tendencies

Vomit

Very clear (undiagnosed) illness (depression, bpd, anxiety, etc)

Sexism

Homophobia

Gorey description

Intoxication

Physical/psychological abuse

Pedophilia

Sexual abuse

Cannibalism

loss, grief, lament

existential crisis

Here we go!

Sebastian was not a stranger to funerals. Conventionally, he was not a fan of them. They reminded him of the temporariness of humans. Of all beings. They reminded him that no matter how much he loves and cares, whatever for, it’ll slip away because of God’s cruelty. That is why he devoted his breathing to God, all in hopes he’d be granted with the gift to be permanent, and to love permanently. God did not listen. His mother died this year, and what was so painful, he watched it very slowly slowly happen. First it was his father. He got sick, very sick. Not the kind of sick that had Sebastian and little Hannah out of school for two weeks. The kind of sick that had you in the hospital connected to machines. The kind of sick that was dehumanizing. Sebastian watched as his father became one with the machine that monitored his heart, and he watched it flatline and drain of life, his father along with it. His father's funeral was his first funeral. He stood outside, staring stupidly at the gravestone and holding his little sister’s and grandfather’s hands.

He wanted to hold his mother who'd just lost the love of her life, but she did not want to be held. She began to shrink and shrivel before Sebastian. He watched it in slow-motion. She stopped talking. She did not read Hannah to bed as she used to. She did not greet her children in the morning. She didn’t get up to. She did not eat, or take her medication, or get out of bed. It was like ivy had grown over her and bound her to the earth. He could only imagine how much pain she was in. Sebastian understood before anyone, before all his peers, that there was a falseness to this world. Real things are not temporary. Real things do not die.

There was love being found where it should not have been sought. That is why it died faster. Sebastian found falseness in what was called love to people, and he resented it. Sebastian had slight anger in himself, anger he felt was childish. I am better than this anger, he thought. This anger was towards God, for when Sebastian did not know who to blame, that is who he sought. This anger was judgment, for how could a being so wise create love so temporary? Sebastian did not forgive himself for being angry with god. When God took his father away, he thought, it must’ve been because of my anger. He did not know how to tell his mother that his father’s death was his fault. That it was all because of his conflict with God. Eventually, he did. Eleven year old Sebastian approached his mother, tears welling up in his eyes and a good month after the funeral, he admitted that he had a disagreement with God, and that he was to blame for her husband’s death. Sebastian could’ve looked back on how messed up it was of her to snap, to tell Sebastian it really was his fault, to overdose four years after, but he didn’t. When his mother died, he did not cry. He only stared in shock. He watched it. He played it back over and over in his head, the way she slowly led up to this. The way she was tortured relentlessly until then. She stopped eating, stopped talking, stopped leaving her bed, and died right in it. He would never question God again, and his grandfather only pushed the ideology. It had been the first time Sebastian and Hannah had ever been inside their grandfather's home when child protective services dropped them off. He had no wife, she died before both of them had been born. His house must’ve been buried in crosses. It was uncomfortably clean too. It meant if they stepped out of line even a little, he’d snap. That is when whatever grabbed a hold of their mother latched onto Hannah. Only nine, she refused to eat or go to school. His grandfather did not seem to notice, or if he did, he didn’t care enough to talk to her. Sebastian did. When she refused and gave her brother the cold shoulder, he guilted her. He began to cry right there in the room she refused to leave. He cried and begged, and Hannah was aware of the new habit he’d taken upon himself. Sebastian was always prone to self destruction. When he was younger, his biggest form of tantrums would be to thrash around and hit himself as hard as he could. This was so he did not hurt others. As he got older, he found a quicker way to repent when he’d done something wrong in the eyes of god. He’d break his skin, as though it was his “sacrifice.” He feared, and he feared. He was afraid God would torture him. Something seemed to be off with Sebastian since the day he was born. Sebastian thought he must be a natural sinner. He must have some curse that makes him worse than his peers, that is why he was so different. So he tortured himself. Self destruction, so that God wouldn’t send him to hell. So that god would not peel at his skin and crush his bones. He’d claw at his skin, as to say, I’ll do it myself, and his sister was aware. It’d be hard not to. His body was scarred from his arms up, his thighs bruised and scratched from where he would hit. When he began to cry in front of her, she sat up from her bed in worry. Frightful he might hurt himself, she followed him into the kitchen, and ate. She did not miss meals after that. Besides that, she couldn’t afford to. Unfortunately, she had one lung, which put her at a higher risk. It made Sebastian worry. He clutched onto her harder than he did to the Bible. She was his last everything. She was the one thing that hadn’t slipped away yet. He feared, and oh how he feared. He had become her new parent, for his grandfather did not care. Things were temporary. She was temporary. She would break. She would fall. If he stopped holding on, she’d fall apart.

He looked to God like he looked at the sun. With fear, with pain, with much respect and hope. Please return in the morning. He begged silently. His life became less and less significant. He faded in the back of the classroom. He spoke little. He laughed even less. When people spoke to him, he re-remembered every time how distant he was with this world. How far away he was from his own body. He didn’t understand what they said, and after “hello,” the words blurred in his mind. He cared very little. The people speaking to him cared even less, that he knew. Some people, however, had to. For some people, it was their job together.

#religious trauma #religious art #philosophy #abstract #existentialism #nihilism #poetry #writers and poets #art

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crash-bump-bring-the-whump · 2 years ago

Text

Patient File: MO-1620

As with most other things, this has been burning in my brain for the last however long and I need to exorcise it by writing it down

TWs: captivity (imprisonment), discussions of self-worth, discussions of anxiety, discussions of trauma, self-flagellation, references to murder (including child murder), referenced but not discussed self-harm and suicidal ideation

The following is a transcript of Inmate MO-1620's visits with the facility psychologist and counselor, Dr. Juan Castillo. These documents contain confidential information. If you have received them in error, please destroy them immediately and notify the phone number on the cover sheet. Failure to do so may result in a felony punishable by a fine in any amount not exceeding $5,000, or imprisonment of not more than 5 years, or both, together with the costs of prosecution. For privacy, inmate names have been redacted in all places that they appear.

This document has been translated from Spanish to English, per written request.

BEGINNING OF TRANSCRIPT

XX/XX/XXXX - Session X

JC: Hello, XXXXX, it's good to meet you. You don't have to be nervous, this isn't a bad visit.

MO-1620: Can I ask why I'm here? They don't...usually let people talk to me.

JC: Of course. You're here because there's been talk of you being released early. I'm going to determine if you're ready for that over the next few weeks.

MO-1620: I...they can't do that. They shouldn't release me.

JC: Why is that?

MO-1620: You've seen my records. You know...you are aware of what I've done. They shouldn't let me out.

JC: I have seen your records. I've also seen your records of conduct during your sentence. I think you're a suitable candidate for release.

MO-1620: My conduct here does not mean anything. This isn't the real world.

JC: I think it does. I know during the incident in July, you didn't fight back. You chose to walk away.

MO-1620: It was not a situation that needed to be escalated. Anyone could see that XXXXX was...not in his right mind. He got bad news, I accidentally bumped into him on my way back from my yard time. I got hit. It was nothing to fight over. The guards got him away before anything could even happen, anyway.

JC: Most people in that situation would've fought back. Why didn't you? You hadn't done anything wrong.

MO-1620: It wasn't necessary. I don't like...I don't like hurting people. I don't want to hurt anyone again.

JC: So following that logic, why are you not a good candidate for early release?

MO-1620: I didn't want to hurt the people I killed, either. I still did it when I was told to. I can't be trusted with freedom.

JC: XXXXX, you were in a difficult position. Youngest member of your team, given the most unpleasant tasks, and threatened with punishment if you didn't fulfill them. You reported everything that was happening, as well, to the public and media. Don't you think that deserves some consideration?

MO-1620: No.

JC: Why not?

MO-1620: Those are excuses given to justify behavior. I've burned people alive. I've killed entire towns with nothing but my casting gloves and a handgun. People have begged me for their lives, for their children's lives, and I ignored them. You cannot ever justify that. You cannot justify any of that.

JC: Your hands are shaking. Are you angry at me?

MO-1620: No.

JC: Are you upset?

MO-1620: No. I am sick. I'd like to go back to my cell, please.

JC: Alright, lean back and I'll call someone in.

XX/XX/XXXX- Session X

JC: Welcome back, XXXXX. How are you feeling?

MO-1620: I'm nervous.

JC: What has you nervous? Nothing will happen to you in here.

MO-1620: I know. I...am just a nervous person, I think. You are...you are kind, though. I apologize for how I ended our last session.

JC: No, I think that was the healthiest thing you could've done. Leaving a situation to calm down is a good way to deal with hard emotions when you don't have other options.

MO-1620: That's very generous of you to say. I felt like I was being dramatic. Throwing a tantrum.

JC: I didn't think so. I do think that you tend to judge yourself very harshly, though.

MO-1620: I don't understand what you mean.

JC: You seem like you take a very harsh stance on your own actions, with very little room for compassion or understanding.

MO-1620: I have to make sure that I don't slip up. I'm...very dangerous.

JC: I don't think you're dangerous. You have the potential for danger, just like anyone else, but I don't feel like I'm in danger right now.

MO-1620: Of course not. The people who raise lions and tigers in their home don't feel like they're in danger, either. But something always happens.

JC: Are you just a lion or a tiger, trapped in someone's home?

MO-1620: I might as well be. I can't hurt people in here. I don't see anyone that I could hurt. It's safest for me to be here.

JC: Don't you feel lonely staying in here?

MO-1620: I do. That's alright.

JC: Why is it alright?

MO-1620: I think being lonely is the least I could do.

JC: Can you elaborate on that?

MO-1620: I took people's families from them. Partners, friends, there are a lot more lonely people in the world now, because of me.

JC: You being lonely won't bring them back

MO-1620: It won't. But neither will me living a life that those people won't ever get to experience again. I still don't understand why my sentence was so light compared to the others.

JC: So you should be punished until you die?

MO-1620: I think so, yes.

JC: That's not a very healthy mindset.

MO-1620: Why should I get the privilege of health?

JC: You're a human being, I think every human being deserves health.

MO-1620: I think that's a bit of a stretch.

JC: Are you not a human being?

MO-1620: No, not anymore. I threw that away when XXXXX told me to start razing XXXXX and I did it.

[Two minutes of silence follow]

MO-1620: I think I'd like to go back to my cell, please, Doctor Castillo.

DD/MM/YYYY - Session X

JC: XXXXX, it's good to see you again. How have you been these last few weeks?

MO-1620: It...is good to see you too. I...have been better. I have also been worse, though.

JC: It's important not to get caught up in minimizing your own pain just because you've experienced worse.

MO-1620: I...I apologize.

JC: My feelings aren't hurt. What has you feeling bad?

MO-1620: I just can't understand what you see in me. It's confusing. I've done some of the worst things someone can do. How could I ever be fit to go back to...to a normal life?

JC: I focus on your current behavior, not your past.

MO-1620: Why is that...okay? Why do you do that?

JC: People can change. Not everyone will, but some people can. I think you're a different person than you were when you hurt those people.

MO-1620: What makes you so sure? I...I feel the same. I don't think I'm any different.

JC: Change isn't some big, sweeping thing. Not permanent change, anyway. It has to be small, and gradual. Sometimes we don't even notice it. I think you've been doing that. I've seen the books you've been checking out. Why have you been focusing on self-help and communication books?

MO-1620: I want...to understand people better. I don't understand others very well. It makes things hard.

JC: Someone who didn't care about hurting others wouldn't care about understanding them.

MO-1620: Maybe. You talk like I deserve to be forgiven, though.

JC: I think it should be on the table. You might not be able to forgive yourself now, but I don't think it should be off-limits forever.

MO-1620: That is not mine to give, though.

JC: Forgiveness?

MO-1620: Yes. Forgiveness for how I hurt others is not something I get to give to myself. That doesn't make sense. I wasn't the one hurt.

JC: I think you were.

MO-1620: How was I hurt? I did the hurting. It's selfish to make this about me and my feelings.

JC: These sessions are all about you. If there's a time to explore something that feels selfish, now is the perfect time. I can't imagine it was fun to do all of that.

MO-1620: There was adrenaline, but...you're right. It wasn't something I liked. I didn't want to do it.

JC: You wanted to stop so badly that you almost beat someone to death.

MO-1620: I...did. I did that, yes. It was not the way I should've handled it. I shouldn't have touched our superior officer.

JC: But nothing else worked. You don't immediately jump to violence. Should you never be forgiven for hurting your superior officer?

MO-1620: No, I shouldn't. I think he deserved it, but I still shouldn't forgive myself for it. I'm not a good judge of what is right or wrong.

JC: Because you trusted the people in charge of you?

MO-1620: Because I knew better, and still made excuses. I made excuses to myself until I couldn't look either my leader or super in the eye without wanting to vomit. I should've taken the torture training instead. I should've accepted the punishments. They couldn't kill me and get away with it, and I knew that. I should've done anything but what I did. The only thing I did right was turn us all in.

JC: I think most people would've done what you did in your position.

MO-1620: I don't think that makes it okay, or forgivable.

JC: I think it does. I think you don't want to admit that it was traumatic to go through all of that, because you happened to also hurt others. But it wasn't fun. I think it hurt you a lot to do those things. I think it was scary to have those threats made if you didn't obey orders.

MO-1620: I...I think I deserve to hurt like this, though. It's fair.

JC: It's fair?

MO-1620: I shouldn't ever forget, or get too comfortable. If it helps me remember, and if it helps me stay in line...I think it's fair. I'll take that.

JC: I see. Would you like a tissue, XXXXX?

MO-1620: ...Yes. Yes, please.

JC: Take your time, and then I'll let them take you back. I think it's a good time to end today.

MO-1620: Thank you, Doctor Castillo.

XX/XX/XXXX - Session X

JC: Hello again. XXXXX. You don't look well, are you feeling alright?

MO-1620: I haven't been sleeping very well. The guards tell me that you are saying I should be released next month. I...I don't understand.

JC: You've demonstrated self-restraint, self-awareness, and a deep remorse for your actions. You haven't participated in so much as an argument in your years here, either. Unless you've somehow managed to fool someone who's caught serial killers in their games, you aren't going to re-offend.

MO-1620: I...I am very afraid, Doctor Castillo. I do not know how to...to say how I'm feeling. It doesn't feel like you've been listening to me at all.

JC: I've been listening more than you think I have. You are...what, XX years old? I've been doing this since before you were born, XXXXX. I've talked to guys who've done what you did before. You're not my first violent offender. You know how many have begged me to stay here, because they were afraid they'd hurt someone else?

MO-1620: Not...many?

JC: You have. You and one other have begged to stay. The rest have all but promised me their first-born to get out of here early. So no. You will not be staying.

MO-1620: What if I mess up again? What if more people end up dead? I cannot handle that. I don't know what I'd do if that happened.

JC: You don't have to know. No one else will die because of you, because you aren't going to do that again. You don't trust yourself enough to even come close to being in a position to do that again. I'd be surprised if you felt confident enough to care for a pet rock when you're released. You will be fine out there.

[One minute of silence follows. Unintelligible noises can be heard, but the recording is too low quality to discern the source. The noise gradually becomes clearer and can be identified as MO-1620 crying.]

JC: Alright, none of that, hands on the chair arms. Good, good. Just like that. Breathe. Here are the tissues. I'll tell them to take you back. Not to your cell yet, you're on a watch. You can go back to your cell afterwards, then we'll get you ready to get out of here.

[A beep can be heard]

JC: Can I get Rodriguez in here? No, no. Nothing like that. Yeah, looks like a panic attack. Just for a few days, maybe a week. Yes. Just to be sure he makes it to release date. No, we certainly don't need a repeat of the XXXXX situation.

[A door squeaks open]

Off. R: Is this...him? XXXXX XXXXX? The one who...

JC: Yes. I think he'll need some help--yes, it's safe. He won't hurt you, if he could I would've asked for Ortega. Just like this, at his elbow. There. I'll call Medical and ask them to send down something to help keep him calm.

JC: I'll check on you later, XXXXX. You'll be fine. Just breathe.

END OF TRANSCRIPT

My analysis of MO-1620 is such: He is safe to return to society. He has expressed marked improvements in behavior, judgement, and habits, along with regret and a strong desire to not re-offend. Additionally, the differences between his actions and those on his team are large enough that I support the proposal put forth by Judge Miranda.

Dr. Juan Castillo

XX/XX/XXXX

#whump #emotional whump #captivity #imprisonment #mage of violence #self loathing #anxiety /#self harm mention #suicide mention #murder mention

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