#i am a diarist too

[storkmuffin]

The surreal reality of being a South Korean woman with a nice life is reading articles like the below during the intermission of the Global Ballet Star Gala at Sejong Arts Center. N. Korean soldiers, who are both my enemy and my family, are dying by the thousands in the Russo-Ukrainian front of WW3 because they were sold for money by their government. They're my brothers and they would also shoot me right in the face on orders without a second's consideration. My mother lamented, How will they (the N. Korean gov't and its supporters) cope with the consequences of this evil? and I had to tell her, They know there won't be any consequences, not for them, and not their children. There never are.

Diary of a Dead North Korean Soldier Reveals Grisly Battlefield Tactics

The troops are exposed, green, loyal—and dying by the thousands in front-line combat against Ukraine

By Dasl Yoon  in Seoul and Jane Lytvynenko  in Kyiv, Ukraine

Updated Jan. 11, 2025 7:38 am ET (Wall Street Journal)

The crude stick-figure diagram, sketched in blue ink, details how North Korean soldiers deployed to support Russia in the Ukraine war should respond to the approach of a Ukrainian drone. One soldier—referred to as “bait” in the drawing—should stand still to lure the drone so that a pair of comrades can attempt to shoot it down.

The grisly tactics were divulged in a diary taken off a slain North Korean soldier on Dec. 21, with passages containing mundane details of life at the front, descriptions of combat tactics and expressions of love for North Korean leader Kim Jong Un, according to excerpts recently made public by Ukraine’s special-operations forces. Independent experts say the diary entries appear genuine, with penmanship, word choice and expressions of ideological fervor all common in North Korea. 

The young soldier who penned the passage about the drone died in a firefight alongside two other compatriots, according to Ukraine’s special forces. 

“Even at the cost of my life, I will carry out the Supreme Commander’s orders without hesitation,” reads one entry from the diary. “I will show the world the bravery and sacrifice of Kim Jong Un’s special forces.”

Notes left in the diary of North Korean soldier Jong Kyong Hong, who was killed fighting Ukrainian forces

Longing for my homeland, having left the warm embrace of my dear father and mother here on Russian land. I celebrate the birthday of my closest comrade Song Ji Myong.

If a UAV is spotted, gather in groups of three. One person must act as bait to lure the drone while the other two take aim and neutralize it with precision shooting. The bait must maintain a distance of 7 meters from the drone. The other two should prepare to shoot down the drone from a distance of 10–12 meters. When the bait stands still, the drone will stop and it can be shot down.

Even at the cost of my life, I will carry out the Supreme Commander’s orders without hesitation.

I will show the world the bravery and sacrifice of Kim Jong Un’s special forces.

The roughly 12,000 North Korean soldiers who arrived in Russia’s Kursk region last October were kept from the front lines for months, digging trenches and offering logistical support. Now they have been deployed into combat—and are being killed at a high rate as they fight another country’s war far away from home.

Neither Moscow nor Pyongyang has publicly confirmed the presence of North Korean soldiers in Russia, which came just months after the two countries signed a mutual defense pact in Pyongyang. Neither government responded to requests for comment.

Russia has deployed its own soldiers with little regard for their lives, sending waves of men to almost certain death to advance just yards, say Kyiv and Washington officials, as well as Ukrainian troops and captured Russian soldiers.

In their first weeks of combat, the North Korean soldiers have been deployed recklessly, according to Ukrainian special-forces drone footage and military experts. They cut across open fields on foot and without armored vehicles or artillery backup, their dark camouflage uniforms highly visible against the white snow. Their training and integration with Russian forces look inadequate.

Many North Koreans are refusing to be captured, opting to kill themselves first or being finished off by their own side when injured, according to Ukrainian officials. “Due to their ideological mindset and indoctrination, they simply lack the concept of surrendering,” said Col. Oleksandr Kindratenko, spokesman for Ukraine’s Special Operations Forces.

Some 4,000 North Koreans have died or been injured since last month, said Ukrainian President Volodymyr Zelensky on Thursday. U.S. officials say more than 1,000 North Koreans died in the last week of December alone.

Zelensky said Saturday that Ukrainian forces had captured two injured North Korean soldiers in the Kursk region. He said they were being treated for their injuries and that Ukraine’s security service was questioning them.

The diary entries are likely motivated by North Korean military lore that celebrates the tale of a young hero from the 1950-53 Korean War. The soldier penned a letter expressing a willingness to give up his life for the motherland just moments before thrusting himself in front of an enemy machine gun. 

“Letters expressing your loyalty to the regime are an attempt to leave a legacy that allows you to be glorified in case you die in battle,” said Ryu Seong-hyeon, a former North Korean soldier who defected in 2019.

‘Human waves’ tactics

The heavy North Korean losses come in Kursk, a region in southern Russia on the border with Ukraine. Kursk has been hotly contested ever since Ukraine seized roughly 100 Russian towns and villages there last summer. As the only Russian territory under Ukrainian control, Kursk is seen as a potential bargaining chip in any talks that would halt fighting.

Ukrainian incursion into Russia

Russia has taken back about half of the lost territory, according to the Institute for the Study of War, a Washington, D.C.-based think tank. But in recent days, Ukraine has kicked off a new counteroffensive in Kursk.

The early glimpses of the North Koreans in action depict them under duress, frightened or confused, according to a video compilation released by Ukraine’s military and verified by Storyful, which is owned by News Corp, the parent company of The Wall Street Journal.

In the compilation, clusters of North Korean troops cower in place or try to outrun Ukrainian drones chasing them. They often lack any cover as they run across fields between trenches. 

About 30% of North Korea’s dispatched troops appear to have already been deployed for front-line fighting, with the rest undergoing training or waiting to be rotated in, according to Doo Jin-ho, a senior analyst at the Korea Institute for Defense Analyses in Seoul.

“The North Koreans are contributing so that the border isn’t breached and freeing up Russian soldiers to search for breakthroughs in other regions,” Doo said. 

Zelensky has suggested that tens of thousands of North Korean soldiers could eventually be deployed to Russia. Last month, South Korea’s spy agency said it had spotted indications of a second deployment in the works.

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‘Brainwashed North Korean’

Little was known about the North Koreans’ activities in Kursk until recently, when Ukraine first started sharing details of their fighting losses. Letters and notes have been found on various fallen troops. In the past several weeks, Ukraine’s special-operations unit has uploaded five handwritten diary entries that it says are from the same North Korean soldier, which include the stick-figure diagram. 

The author of the diary is named Jong Kyong Hong, according to the passport Ukrainian officials found. He and two fellow troops were killed in a shootout on Dec. 21 with Ukraine’s special-operations forces near the village of Pogrebki in the southwest tip of Kursk. They were also found with fake identification documents. 

DNA tests by Ukrainian authorities on the three soldiers suggested they had East Asian origins—Chinese, Korean or Japanese, according to Kindratenko, the Ukrainian military spokesman. 

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The phrasing also appeared authentic. For instance, in describing the drone strike, the diary used the word “so-myol” as a translation for “destroy.” In South Korea, “so-myol” describes the extinction of an animal species. 

On Dec. 9, Jong jotted down a celebration of a friend’s birthday, whom he called “my closest comrade.” He wrote that he longed for his homeland, having “left the warm embrace of my dear father and mother.” 

In the description of the drone tactics—which was undated—Jong wrote that the soldier acting as a lure should maintain a distance of about 7 meters, or 23 feet, from the drone. Soldiers under artillery fire should run toward a previously hit location, since the odds of the same spot getting hit twice is minimal. 

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Elsewhere, Jong listed some ideological tenets of the Kim regime. He says he grew up in the “benevolent embrace” of the country’s ruling Workers’ Party and that his mission as a soldier is to protect Kim. He wrote that he needed to atone for unspecified sins of the past.

“The contents of the diary are typical of a brainwashed North Korean soldier,” said Bang Jong-kwan, a former South Korean army major general. 

In a different entry, Jong had penned the words from a speech that Kim gave to battalion commanders last November in Pyongyang. That speech may have been conveyed to front-line troops by the North Korean commanders, experts say. 

Soldiers like Jong are required to memorize Kim’s speeches word by word. The diary passage quotes Kim’s goal for the North Korean army of “engaging in battle immediately” after receiving an order. 

Soobin Kim contributed to this article.

Write to Dasl Yoon at dasl.yoon@wsj.com

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Appeared in the January 13, 2025, print edition as 'North Korean Diary Shows Ukraine Horror'.Hide Conversation (1052)

[taylortruther]

What are your predictions for 12?

i think it will feel lighter and be kind of oddball, with some interesting production choices or more experimental songs (nothing TOO crazy, but unusual for taylor.) i think there will be this underlying theme of "this is who i am, i've come into my own" and as a result songs about her confidence, personal achievement, reaching an important place as a human/woman/icon/etc. i think it will be more than just a "yay i love travis" love album, but i do believe she'll continue writing about her past or past relationships, although maybe less specifically. but i also think she'll be breaking a lot of new ground too, i'm expecting to see a lot of topics or themes that are either brand new or were only mentioned on the fringes before. questions of legacy, family, privacy, politics. also, lyrically i think we will see even more cryptic/symbolic/singer-songwriter songs, because she still loves a diaristic song but we've been seeing her stray from that for the last several albums. so more fictionalized songs, songs about other figures, songs about a specific fear or theme (like the prophecy.)

just overall a mature album that breaks new ground, and feels optimistic but also deep/heavy.

[thefudge]

If I may dare ask what are your favourite romance novels?????

this will sound obnoxious, but i tend to love romance best when i encounter it in other genres (and i could definitely make a list of novels from different genres where the romance isn't the point but it goes so hard for me, and i think i have made some lists like that in the past? i really have to organize my books/book recs/book rec tags. and maybe make more lists)

but if we're going by novels that are considered and (could be) classified as romance, here's an imperfect list:

all of austen of course, but especially pride and prejudice and persuasion

jane eyre by charlotte bronte

the age of innocence by edith wharton

anna karenina by tolstoy (where i think i'm fonder of the kitty/levin pairing)

doctor zhivago by boris pasternak

gone with the wind by margaret mitchell (hate/love relationship but i am not immune to it, i'm afraid! i will say i prefer the book to the movie)

excellent women by barbara pym (god, i love the grumpy hero/heroine pairing here)

bridget jones's diary (the first book especially)

girl with a pearl earring by tracy chevalier (the movie too! colin firth and scarlett johansson had such good chemistry, it was surreal)

the blue castle by l.m. montgomery (love that we have a genuine "plain jane" heroine that doesn't turn out to be beautiful if she lets down her hair or any of that nonsense)

the french lieutenant's woman by john fowles (a postmodern romance, in many ways, but the yearning is so good)

spring snow by yukio mishima (i do think this is a romance, first and foremost, and my goddd, the angst and the yearning)

eligible by curtis sittenfeld (a modern p&p retelling; i know a lot of ppl hate this one but i really like it, though it could have been shorter. some of the lizzy/darcy moments in this book made my brain go brrr. the humor is great too)

sofia khan is not obliged (but just the first book in this series - another fun p&p retelling with a muslim heroine)

conversations with friends by sally rooney (i promised i wouldn't stretch the genre but this to me read as more of a romance than anything. and though i struggled with some parts of this book, i will admit that the affair between frances and nick did get to me. there were some particular sex scenes where rooney was doing what i like with the smut in terms of revelation and vulnerability)

the princess diarist by carrie fisher (okay, i'm doing it again, this is technically classified as memoir but again, the sections about harrison ford?? INSANE in terms of romantic anguish and angst. theee RPF of all time)

who's that girl by mhairi mcfarlane (some scenes in this book literally made my heart skip a beat?? this is a celeb/journalist romance that really worked for me. mcfarlane doesn't always strike the right chord with me but here, omgg. i hated her a bit for that ending, but some of the moments between the hero and heroine made me kick my feet like a lil kid)

birthday girl by penelope douglas (i don't know if i'd call this favorite, but it did the age gap thing right, while also being hot and well-written. it didn't toootally win me over, but i appreciate it when an author takes the "fell for my boyfriend's dad" trope seriously)

[fatehbaz]

As early as 1700, Samuel Sewall, the renowned Boston judge and diarist, connected “the two most dominant moral questions of that moment: the rapid rise of the slave trade and the support of global piracy” in many American colonies [...]. In the course of the eighteenth century, [...] [there was a] semantic shift in the [literary] trope of piracy in the Atlantic context, turning its [...] connotations from exploration and adventure to slavery and exploitation. [...] [A] large share of Atlantic seafaring took place in the service of the circum-Atlantic slave trade, serving European empire-building in the Americas. [...] Ships have been cast as important sites of struggle and as symbols of escape in [...] Black Atlantic consciousness, from Olaudah Equiano’s Interesting Narrative (1789) and Richard Hildreth’s The Slave: or Memoir of Archy Moore (1836 [...]) to nineteenth century Atlantic abolitionist literature such as Frederick Douglass’s My Bondage and My Freedom (1855) or Martin Delany’s Blake (1859-1862). [...] Black and white abolitionists across the Atlantic world were imagining a different social order revolving around issues of resistance, liberty, (human) property, and (il)legality [...].

---

Using black pirates as figures of resistance [...], Maxwell Philip’s novel Emmanuel Appadocca (1854) emphasizes the nexus of insatiable material desire and its conditions of production: slavery. [...] [T]he consumption of commodities produced by slave labor itself was delegitimized [...]. Philip, a Trinidadian [and "illegitimate" "colored" child] [...], published Emmanuel Appadocca as a protest against slavery in the United States [following the Fugitive Slave laws of 1850.]. [...] [The novel places] at its center [...] a heroic non-white pirate and intellectual [...] [whose] pirate ship [...] [is] significantly named The Black Schooner [...]. One of the central discourses in [the book] is that of legitimacy, of rights and lawfulness, of both slavery and piracy [...]. About midway into the book, Appadocca gives a [...] speech in which he argues that colonialism itself is a piratical system:

If I am guilty of piracy, you, too [are] [...] guilty of the very same crime. ... [T]he whole of the civilized world turns, exists, and grows enormous on the licensed system of robbing and thieving, which you seem to criminate so much ... The people which a convenient position ... first consolidated, developed, and enriched, ... sends forth its numerous and powerful ships to scour the seas, the penetrate into unknown regions, where discovering new and rich countries, they, in the name of civilization, first open an intercourse with the peaceful and contented inhabitants, next contrive to provoke a quarrel, which always terminates in a war that leaves them the conquerors and possessors of the land. ... [T]he straggling [...] portions of a certain race [...] are chosen. The coasts of the country on which nature has placed them, are immediately lined with ships of acquisitive voyagers, who kidnap and tear them away [...].

In this [...], slavery appears as a direct consequence of the colonial venture encompassing the entire “civilized world,” and “powerful ships” - the narrator refers to the slavers here - are this world’s empire builders. [...] Piracy, for Philip, signifies a just rebellion, a private, legitimate [resistance] against colonial exploiters and economic inequality - he repeatedly invokes their solidarity as misfortunate outcasts [...].

---

All text above by: Alexandra Ganser. “Cultural Constructions of Piracy During the Crisis Over Slavery.” A chapter from Crisis and Legitimacy in the Atlantic American Narratives of Piracy: 1678-1865. Published 2020. [Bold emphasis and some paragraph breaks/contractions added by me.]

[timesothercompany]

I made a thing!

Paint Program is a compilation of 26 Microsoft Paint files I made in the early 2000s, and recently rediscovered on an old laptop. I consider them to be digital artefacts of the Y2K era, not artworks. 

Zine 29 pages 5 x 7" Inkjet printed Edition of 8 2024

Concept, text, & design by Jo Minhinnett

Below I've written in diaristic detail about the logistics of designing and producing something by primarily trial and error...

Background:

I had this zine idea a few years ago when I was cleaning out my mom's condo and going through our old family laptops, from back in the day when a household only had one computer. The MS Paint files I found there were likely migrated from an even older desktop computer because I wouldn't have owned a laptop in 2003 when the earliest files were dated. The files were BMPs and PNGs and I made sure to retain all the original file names in the zine.

How I made it:

This was a headache to layout as the graphic files were geriatric and I wanted a true-to-screen Microsoft color palette printed on paper, which doesn't work when you convert the files to PDF or drop them into Photoshop (at least without a ton of work; photoshop doesn't recognize the colors in these image files and appears to auto approximate the color). I was out of my wheelhouse and I'm still curious to know how a designer would go about handling these files to get an authentic color match in Photoshop. I spent SO long trying to figure this all out and did a ton of print tests because I NEEDED that MS Paint palette to look turn of the 21st century and not have the colors changed to whatever present day Adobe software wanted them to be.

In the end, Microsoft speaks to Microsoft, so I laid it all out in Powerpoint and called it a day. This was kind of a 'give up' moment for me, but in hindsight, after all the tests, it proved to be the most logical and un-fussy way to do it. I also had to print the zine from Powerpoint if I wanted to get "true" MS Paint colors, which really slowed everything down and made it impossible to print many copies (crying inside a little). I printed on my Epson home printer and a stack of 50lb. premium matte Red River Paper (cardstock weight) which is almost too much and too heavy , but I loved how there was no bleed-through and how it made the book feel extra tactile. If you have memories of printing out your MS Paint creations on office paper circa 2003, you know how terrible and soggy that was and my heart goes out to you. I think I over-compensated with the 50lb. weight because of this traumatic memory. All to say, the inkjet print quality is simply astounding, pure matte heaven! I hand-punched the binding holes and hand-assembled each one with the plastic coil. I am over the moon with how it turned out. My only hope is to have a bigger edition one day, once I solve the color issue, and be able to send this baby off to a local commercial printer. So long as the color isn't compromised. Making this zine was wonderful and nostalgic. The end result fetishizes MS Paint a lot because the print quality would never have been this good back then and on certain pages, it kind of fools me for a second. Like, wait a second, does that actually look good? For the most part, it doesn't though: the graphics were never created with artistic intention and I made sure to include files that were especially brainless (although I kept out any that were remotely vulgar). It's all part of the low-fi aesthetic that I love, which was dictated by the only widely available technology for the average consumer in the early 2000s. I wasn't particularly creative or intentional with the technology and I think that's really point of this zine, as an everyday record and artefact of a teen in the Y2K age.

[wavesoutbeingtossed]

Ugh all the Evermore/Midnights/Joever discourse this morning has been excellent and set my brain on fire and I love discussing all the themes and motifs etc. In her music!

The Evermore marriage stuff is really sitting with me today. I know the music is only a glimpse into a moment and isn’t an eyewitness account of facts but rather an exploration of feelings etc. But to be parasocial for a minute, it just really is fascinating how the topic of marriage/commitment is referenced almost giddily on Lover (I’d marry you with paper rings/the bridge of Lover/Wedding imagery in It’s Nice to Have A Friend).

Then on folklore, it’s like shit finally gets serious: one single thread of gold tied me to you (I have stated numerous times how much I’m obsessed with that line and implications), I want to give you my wild and a child, but is it enough if I could never give you peace? It’s like on Lover, the idea is exciting and new (ahem like when us plebes get engaged, not that I’m saying that’s what happened to them), then folklore a year later is when realizations set in when you’re starting to actually plan for that life. It’s no longer a hypothetical “one day” when that day is barreling towards you at a breakneck pace. She’s overjoyed by the idea of getting married on Lover, but understands on folklore that wedding =/= marriage/commitment, that there are very serious, very real implications in the act, and they’re also very scary. She wants to build a family with this person, but the implications of what that life will entail for them both are overwhelming. This is what I want, but is it fair of me to do so? (Obviously, the answer we believed at the time was, yes, because presumably her partner wanted it, too.)

Evermore like many of you pointed out paints marriage/commitment significantly darker, even under the guise of fictional characters. Marriage traps the protagonist in Ivy, it kills Este in No Body, No Crime, it scares the protagonist and breaks the heart of the subject in Champagne Problems, it crushes the spirit of the narrator of Tolerate It and Happiness, it’s elusive for the characters in Tis The Damn Season… It almost feels like she’s playing out the worst case scenarios of the fears from Peace through these songs. Am I going to get hurt? Am I going to hurt someone else? Are we falling into a trap of our own making? Are we bound to destroying each other like so many of those who came before us?

Obviously there’s no way to know how much of this was based on diaristic elements vs. what truly was inspired by the movies, shows and books she was consuming as she said at the time. However, to jump on the parasocial train for a minute, it then makes me wonder… If the question on Folklore was, is it enough if I could never give you peace? The characters in Evermore seem to indicate, no, it actually may not, and these are the different reasons why. Was it because she was scared from her own past experiences? (E.g. her previous relationships, her parents’ divorce, her best friend going through a divorce at that very moment, etc.) Or was her partner now giving her reason to doubt the commitment she so happily declared in Lover coming to pass?

Of course, with Renegade coming out the following year, it seems like there’s another piece of the puzzle in the commitment/marriage motifs: Are you really going to talk about timing in times like these? Is it your anxiety that’s stopping you from giving me everything, or do you just not want to? That’s a lot more damning. (In the sense of, painting the picture. Not damning in terms of judging people with struggles, just being clear!) She’s been working through her own fears and concerns through Folklore and Evermore and the conclusion she seems to have drawn is, yes, it’s still worth it, but now it seems perhaps her partner isn’t. The “or do you just not want to?” Always gave me pause, because it’s a moment of brutal honesty, wondering if her partner just isn’t ready, or doesn’t want to be, full stop. It’s clear that she’s ready for the next step (e.g. “is it insensitive of me to tell you to get your shit together so I can love you?”), but he appears to not be.

So it seems that at some point post-Lover but particularly post-Folklore, something has given her reason to feel anxious about marriage and what it entails. It could be her own experiences absolutely, but the lines in Renegade imply a little, er, direct input in the matter as well. She wasn’t the first renegade to need somebody (and get help), and now she’s holding her hand out to her partner to help him do the same so they can move forward on the plans they’ve been building since Lover. But the song leaves the resolution up in the air.

Then by the time we get to Midnights, the topic has a lot more shades of grey. There’s the obvious “All they keep asking me is if I’m going to be your bride/The only kind of girl they see is a one night or a wife,” in Lavender Haze, and to this day I still don’t think she’s rejecting the concept of marriage with that, but what she is saying is that it’s a sore point because she’s sick of being reduced to her marital status in the media. At the time, I assumed the frustration over the marital status was because (rightly) it’s infruriating for women to always be reduced to who they are married to and the children they produce, especially one as singularly successful on her own as Taylor is. Now, we can also assume with the benefit of hindsight (and Tree’s takedown of DeuxMoi) that it was also a very sore subject for her on a personal level, perhaps because it was looking more likely that she wasn’t going to be anyone’s bride anytime soon. Then You’re Losing Me later spells it out, that marriage was on the table, but seems like it was almost weaponized. I still think her spitting out “I wouldn’t marry me either,” isn’t coming from a place of self-loathing or insecurity, but an argument used against her about their future plans. It’s scathing and devastating in how it targets one of her deepest hurts, calling back right to how the album opened.

If I had to guess based on the albums, the trajectory of the topic goes I can’t wait to marry you -> The closer we get to it the more scared I am that I may destroy this -> Is this going to destroy us? -> Actually you may be the one destroying us.

(It does seem like there’s an obvious shift between folklore and evermore, and not to get too dark, but like many of you I wonder if the success of Folklore precipitated the fears and anxieties and hurt she sings about on Evermore, iykwim. Which becomes abundantly clear by Midnights.)

I don’t want to get ahead of myself, but I’m just feeling soooooo tingly about how these themes are going to be explored on TTPD, because I almost can’t see how they won’t be given what a big part of her life it was for years. I know she doesn’t owe us anything but… Taylor, we just want to talk.

[pop-punklouis]

i have seen so many people online saying this album feels like she took her diary and set it to music…. but they mean that positively and i mean that in a please, i am begging her to edit way….

girl..... me too. i enjoy how personal she's always been when it comes to her music and never shying away from that diaristic writing style. but perhaps.... again..... we need a rough draft.... we need to scale it back...... we need to make it where i'm not listening to new york slam poetry night set to a lil melody.......

[oscyrich]

Extract from Diaristic Novel (or just this morning)

"I gaze, as I do too regularly, into the mirror, recognising the face of who I am — the now-ready face; armed to take on the day with the eyes of repeat use, established sin, and routine wrong-doing, which, in addition to showing the creased crimson curtains guarding the vision into the deeper darker world, bare a rare and maudlin tone of black that near enough frightens if not at least worries… to the one shrewd enough to delve deep enough - or the “master eye-spelunker.” Most can penetrate past the red curtains hung by marijuana and the opioid. There’s also a matter of dilation to contend with, courtesy of the benzo-opioid amalgam. If one could thrust themself deeper they might come across that particular varnish, glazing the eyes of those schmaltzy, introverted fellows who have quite a specific measure of sensitivity to say the least. One might begin to see who I am, to see the human behind the junk, Oscar in the Trash. And diving in further, you’ll be immersed in the sooty hole that has little chance of whitening after the scorch marks of Hell’s flaming darkness. You’ll begin to see the imprints of life in the chasm of the eyes, like years upon the mountain rock, the etchings of tides only imaginable far from their haunting, grand truth. You’ll see where the insufferable winds have ground away the surroundings over time, where existential angst has scratched and scarred the walls, and where chaos has comprised the curvatures around you, as have those subtle streaks of gold you seldom see been left by the beatitudes and the glories in life, and the marginal range from the spectrum of beautiful phenomena I have perceived. The morning has finished. I walk away from the reflection."

• Welcome to The Oscy Rich Lounge •

[kellykswift]

Mass coming out theory vs. Taylors work

So I d like to add my 2 cents to this excellent post, done by @daisyswift3

DISCLAIMER: I know that her art has other references / meanings as well like for example the ones about her muse etc. But I am ONLY focusing on the mass coming out theory connecting to Taylors work

I think this mass coming out theory is true and the first "public" easter egg was this interview in 2021 - when Taylor promoted RED TV. She is talking about easter eggs and jumping in the water.

WATER. SEA. OCEAN. - keep en eye out for those. She already told us in 2021. So i digged into it because it totally makes sense in 2024 - also with the latest events, posted by @daisyswift3

When the theory is correct and the plan of the mass coming out started around 2020/2021 – then we need to take a look into Taylors work. In this interview she also said that she recently hid her secret codes in the capital letters of her lowercase lyrics. So folklore is the first album with ONLY lowercase song titles. Maybe this mass coming out thing was just an idea first, but by the end of 2021, when RED TV was released, the plan fall got more specific.

So lets start with FOLKLORE

We know that Taylor is an excellent cone artist (aka cowboy like me). Maybe the lowercase thing was just an idea at first and the plan was not specific yet, therefore she only dropped the hint in an interview in 2021.

When Folklore was released, she made sure we believe Folklore is pure fiction written from different perspectives. But she also said in an interview when asked about it (one of the few she did for Folklore):

My world felt opened up creatively. There was a point that I got to as a writer who only wrote very diaristic songs that I felt it was unsustainable for my future moving forward. So what I felt after we put out Folklore was like "oh wow, people are into this too, this thing that feels really good for my life and feels really good for my creativity… it feels good for them too?"

— Swift on how Folklore changed her creative process moving forward, Apple Music 1

What if the original plan of a mass coming out was established during this writing process? The tortured poets, where Taylor is chairman … they existed in 2020.

Here are the songs containing water, sea, ocean imagery either in lyrics or in actual images.

BONUS:  mentioning of poets the first time in the lakes (and she made sure we get it because she released the original version of this song on July 24, 2021.

Remember the whole Woodvale thing?

… none of it was accidental.

The 1: Roaring twenties, tossing pennies in the pool

cardigan: Leaving like a father, running like water

The Last Great American Dynasty: They say she was seen on occasion, pacing the rocks, staring out at the midnight sea

My Tears Ricochet: And so the battleships will sink beneath the waves

Seven: Feet in the swing over the creek

Peace: I’m a fire and I’ll keep your brittle heart warm if your cascade, ocean wave blues come

The Lakes: Take me to the Lakes where all the poets went to die

Hoax

This is me trying

August

Exile

So lets move on to EVERMORE

To be honest, I am not so sure how Evermore fits into the narrative. Maybe that’s why she doesn’t acknowledge it, although it’s an amazing peace of art!

My guess is, that she made another HUGE hint to TTPD. It was released on Emily Dickinson's birthday.

… so does this sound familiar?

Also I think Guilty as sin is related to Evermore: I keep these longings locked in lower case inside a vault (Gold rush for example).

Water

So WATER. SEA. OCEAN.

willow: I’m like the water when your ship rolled in that night

gold rush: Eyes like sinking ships on waters so inviting, I almost jumped in

Long Story Short: And my waves meet your shore ever and evermore

Marjorie: Long limbs and frozen swims, you’d always go past where our feet could touch

Evermore: I’m on waves, out being tossed

Coney Island

Happiness

No body no crime

Carolina – released on june 24 2022 – this whole movie is basically on water.

O Carolina creeks running through my veins

Carolina: It’s between me, the sand, and the sea

Also very TTPD themed:

Oh, Carolina knows Why for years they've said That I was guilty as sin And sleep in a liar's bed But the sleep comes fast And I'll meet no ghosts It's between me, the sand, and the sea

Cassandra:

So, they killed Cassandra first 'cause she feared the worst And tried to tell the town So, they filled my cell with snakes, I regret to say Do you believe me now?

Guilty as sin

Someone told me There's no such thing as bad thoughts Only your actions talk These fatal fantasies Giving way to labored breath Taking all of me We've already done it in my head If it's make believe Why does it feel like a vow We'll both uphold somehow?

TSMWEL

Were you sent by someone who wanted me dead? Did you sleep with a gun underneath our bed? Were you writing a book? Were you a sleeper cell spy? In fifty years, will all this be declassified? And you'll confess why you did it And I'll say, "Good riddance" 'Cause it wasn't sexy once it wasn't forbidden I would've died for your sins Instead, I just died inside

The ghost in Anti Hero

I just love the ghost, that’s why I put it here.

So flash forward to midnights. My assumption is, that since the pandemic has been over, and she was able to tour again, she wanted to do one LAST TS the brand heist (because speak now diamond heist music video was a hint to that) and create the biggest thing possible. The Eras tour. I haven’t looked much into midnights but the main hint for the mass coming out theory is the last scene in her tour: the Truman show paralells.

Here is the post to this analysis:

https://www.tumblr.com/kylieswift31/757073433557352448?source=share

I know it sounds crazy but I think the whole TTPD concept started already around 2021 before midnights was released.

If you wanna fall down the rabbit whole, here are also some amazing connections:

[reputayswift]

what do you think Suburban Legends is about?

I think it’s about having a tumultuous and undefined relationship with someone and putting up with red flags because you want to believe you’re meant to end up together. Basically this quote about Style:

This song is about those relationships that are never really done. You always [have] that one person who you feel might interrupt your wedding and be like, “don’t do, it ‘cause we’re not over yet.” I think everybody has that one person who kind of floats in and out of their life and the narrative is never truly over.

But she’s reimagining this relationship as a high school romance—as she’s wont to do!

Here are a few section-by-section explanations and parallels just for fun:

Note. Sometimes I use “Taylor” to refer to Taylor, the songwriter, and sometimes to Taylor, the narrator of the song. I’m not saying Taylor, the songwriter, experienced all of this literally lol 🫶

you had people who called you on unmarked numbers / in my peripheral vision

She’s noticed that the person she’s with often gets mysterious phone calls when they’re together, the “unmarked” implying he’s hiding the contact names from her because he’s pursuing multiple romances at once. (“I heard that you’ve been out and about with some other girl / he said ‘what you heard is true but I can’t stop thinking about you and I’ / I said I’ve been there too a few times”)

I let it slide like a hose on a slippery plastic summer / all was quickly forgiven

Here she’s combining the phrase “let it slide” (allowing someone to get away with something) with the imagery of a Slip ‘N Slide (a flat, plastic water slide you wet with a hose—usually for children). It was meant to be a playful summer romance with looser expectations, so she ignored the calls and didn’t demand exclusivity. (“August slipped away into a moment in time / ‘cause it was never mine” / “it was just a summer thing” / “no rules in breakable heaven but / o, it’s a cruel summer”)

you were so magnetic it was almost obnoxious / flush with the currency of cool / I was always turning out my empty pockets

Someone who’s “flush with cash” has all the wealth they could ever need. Someone’s who’s “flush with the currency of cool,” then, has endless charm that makes relationships easy to obtain and gives them access to anything they desire. In contrast, Taylor is “turning out [her] empty pockets”; the same charm that drew her in makes her feel insecure and inadequate beside him. A “flush” can also refer to blushing with embarrassment or attraction, further showing the effects of his charisma.

I had the fantasy that maybe our mismatched star signs / would surprise the whole school / when I ended up back at our class reunion / walkin' in with you

This is far from the first time Taylor has used high school as a metaphor for the gossip, pressure, and claustrophobia that comes with the spotlight: (“they whisper in the hallway, ‘she’s a bad, bad girl’” / “honey, life is just a classroom” / “you had it figured out since you’re in school / everybody loves pretty everybody loves cool”). High school classmates may question the compatibility of two people based on social standing (“currency of cool”) or zodiac sign the same way tabloids theorize how and when her relationship might crash and burn from the outside. The high school reunion represents an opportunity to show everyone who’s ever doubted her that they were wrong, that their love was fated and they fell back together in the end.

you'd be more than a chapter in my old diaries / with the pages ripped out

With Taylor’s diaristic writing style, she’s often accused of discarding partners and keeping the songwriting material. Again, this fantasy reunion would allow her to silence these detractors.

I am standin' in a 1950s gymnasium / and I can still see you now

A few possibilities here:

Being, physically, in an old gymnasium reminds her of this fantasy and her dashed hopes for their relationship

Taylor’s fantasy takes place in her high school gym, which was built in the 50s

Taylor’s fantasy takes place in a gymnasium in the 1950s, echoing the James Dean x Good Girl dynamic seen throughout 1989

I didn't come here to make friends / we were born to be suburban legends

Despite “let[ting] it slide,” she actually desires a defined, committed relationship. “Suburban legends” is a play on “urban legends,” which could refer to becoming the talk-of-the-town and/or a renowned power couple out of ordinary circumstances (“you and me, we’d be a big conversation”). However, the veracity of “legends” is often disputed, hinting that whispered rumors may be all that’s left of their love in the end. The use of “suburban” also supports the image of a small-scale high school romance.

when you hold me, it holds me together / and you kiss me in a way that's gonna screw me up forever

Their chemistry is so strong she knows she’s doomed to always wonder when and if he’ll reappear.

tick-tock on the clock, I pace down your block / I broke my own heart 'cause you were too polite to do it / waves crash to the shore, I dash to the door / you don't knock anymore and I always knew it / that my life would be ruined

Again, she is placing the relationship in a “world that was one block wide,” where impromptu visits are a short walk away. Time is running out to define the relationship, and Taylor has resigned to call it off altogether knowing he’s content to string her along indefinitely. The past tense “broke” versus the present tense “dash” could indicate she’s already called it off and is visiting despite herself. The fact he no longer “knocks” (approaches her independently) confirms her fears that he’s losing interest and she’ll be left to wonder about and pursue him, alone.

[groovesnjams]

47 / 50

"Sick To My Stomach" by Rebecca Black

DV:

Totally by chance both Rebecca Black and I happened to be in London when her debut album dropped, after a series of EPs and one-off singles with interesting collaborators on her part and a few years of MG and me talking about how she’s quietly built a catalog of bops. I’m still not sure exactly what to make of her career, but I watched as a packed crowd at Heaven sang along with album cuts that were less than a day old and absolutely lost their shit when she launched into the 2021 remix of “Friday.” Maybe that’s camp, maybe it’s just the equivalent of Eiffel 65 dropping “Blue (Da Ba Dee)” into a crowd of drunk millennials; Rebecca Black was able to follow up with the fantastic “Girlfriend”, which is more than most one-hit wonders can do. It felt like Black was a hometown hero returning after she’d made it, except she wasn’t actually home and her self-released album apparently never even charted.

It seems too early to say what any of this might mean: “Sick to my Stomach” is no “Anyway” (a modern classic), but it’s a catchy slice of the classic synthpop sound where Black’s found her sweet spot. “Sick to my Stomach” also isn’t a synecdoche for the State of Pop Music Today - it’s way too much of a slow build for both radio and playlists - nor is it emblematic of hyperpop - a genre that was over the hill even before Rupaul dropped a cash-in EP more than a year ago. Black's written a carefully observed, emotionally intense bop about self-examination and projection, a twist on the "I Want You Back" concept from the perspective of someone who isn't sure she does. The obvious reference point for a song like "Sick To My Stomach" is Carly Rae Jepsen. But that's less because of the lyric - Carly writes as if she’s conducting a dissection, while Black uses words like they’re blunt instruments - and more because of the visceral imagery, the detailed production, the diaristic approach. “Sick to my Stomach” even makes space for a striking middle eight, something Jepsen (like most pop singers in the streaming era) has slowly phased out in favor of an extra chorus. “Sick to my Stomach” might not be Black's strongest single, but it’s a sign that her personal bar is getting higher. Maybe at some point the rest of the world will catch up to that crowd in London.

MG:

Rebcca Black is the first, but certainly not, by far, the last of what I will call “The Billionaire’s Daughters” on our list this year. With most of them I feel pretty straightforward: why am I being forced to engage with this? But with Black it’s much more complicated. While it’s obvious that the only reason we’re aware of her new work at all is because of the viral success of her daddy-funded teen hit “Friday,” I genuinely do not think she’s daddy-funded any longer. She’s the child of two veterinarians, and while that’s certainly a soft and luxurious start to life, it’s not the leg up you get from being born to the “former executive editor and current publisher of the Wall Street Journal” or from attending a fancy school in England, which a preponderance of this list managed to do. And while “Sick to my Stomach” is fine and pleasant and nothing more, the way Pitchfork used the unremarkableness of Let Her Burn as permission to tear into her appearance and branding instead of the work itself makes me really angry. She’s about as much of an underdog story as anyone in her position could be but as an artist she’s amassed a mediocre catalog on average where “Sick to my Stomach” rests somewhere above the middle.

[finniestoncrane]

congrats on 1k Finnie!!! u deserve all the hype!! I’m gonna throw myself in the ring for the event, respectfully requesting number 9

a little bit about me is that I’m 4’10 (pun intended), I have brown eyes, reaaallly long curly brown hair, I wear glasses (the dano riddler kind LMAO), my fashion sense basically Bella Swan from Twilight, I’m questioning my sexuality/bordering on unlabeled so I’m fine with anyone, I’m an INTP 5w6, and a Leo (I don’t know shit about astrology lol.)

my hobbies include:

- acting, which is ironic bc I can’t stand theater kids lmao

- writing, whether it be my cringe ass fanfics, or to my feelings (or lack there of), or to the dreams I have at night, I gotta always have it documented

- watching movies, specifically horror or comedy. If I have any free time, u can GUARANTEE u that I’m going to being at home watching a movie, or at the theater with my friends. If I could legally marry my favorite movie, I would.

personality wise, I come off as very blunt and have a really dry sense of humor to everyone I meet. When I’m in my element, I can’t help but let my wit get the better of me. I am legitimately confident in my capabilities and myself. I can almost always talk my way in or out of situations. I love cracking jokes at any given moment and I always enjoy making anyone laugh, I’ve been told that I have good comedic timing so obviously, I gotta keep going with it. I also curse a lot, like I need a censor bar around my mouth at all times lol. I’m not afraid to stand up for myself or my friends and honestly, I kinda enjoy to. I absolutely value humor and friendship the most, and they are what keep me going. If I could describe myself as 5 fictional characters, I’d be Mickey Milkovich (Shameless), MJ (MCU), Ruth Langmore (Ozark), Louise Belcher (Bob’s Burgers), and Beth Harmon (The Queen’s Gambit). My positive traits are humorous, competitive, straight-forward, creative, and quick-witted

on the flip side, when I’m in a newish setting or a setting where I’m off my game/ not feeling myself, I’m ice cold, rarely speaking to anyone and if I do, it’s venomous. I tend to isolate myself and obsessively throw myself into whatever it is I need to do and just be done with it. I try to maintain a high level of professionalism and confidence and hold myself to a high standard, becoming wildly competitive and forcing myself to be better than everyone, basically faking it till I make it (and it always works). I tend to hide and bottle up my emotions, and I’m scared of/ hate being emotionally vulnerable. My negative traits are obsessive, indecisive, aggressive, sadistic, and emotionally detached

…and I just realized I went on for waaay too long lmao sorry. congrats again on 1k!!!

🎀 No.9: Ever Fallen In Love With Someone 🎀

tell me a little bit about yourself and i'll give you a rogue pairing a/n: thank you!! it's funny, with this one i thought of several rogues and then suddenly it came to me in a moment of sheer inspiration and i was like "oh shit yeah that's the one" 1k milestone info! 🔞minors dni🔞 • kofi • tag: finnie1k

i swear to you the height thing is a coincidence but i think a short couple are strong vibes. and he's a mama's boy, so the fact that your hair is long and curly like hers would probably be one of the first things that drew him in

we know he feels about glasses wearers, so... yeah

(side note: i feel you on the theatre kids one, i studied theatre at university and it made me realise i couldn't be a playwrite, because i cannot cope with actors)

ok so oswald has an absolute flair for the dramatics, and don't tell me he wouldn't make an excellent actor. you two could reenact scenes together and write your own plays or movies just for you two!

he strikes me as a diarist, so spending time together writing whatever you're writing while he catches up on his comings and goings in his little unpublished and just for him (for now) autobiography would be one of his favourite wind-down activities at the end of the day

oswald lives his entire life with main character energy and you can't convince me he didn't pick that up from obsessively watching movies about underdogs rising to the top and film noirs. he loves gore and brutality too, so a thriller or a horror would be perfect viewing material for you, and he'd definitely take you to the theatre on a date

ok so, it might be a nightmare putting the two of you together, but it could also potentially be the most fun. both of you are dry, humorous, experts in wit and sarcasm. charming enough to talk your way out of disaster, and into opportunity. together, you'd be a dynamic duo, perfect partners in crime. the confidence you would have separately and together would be insurmountable and intimidating, which oswald would find deeply romantic

little comments and sneaky jokes with the right timing are his forte too, i'm beginning to wonder if you aren't just the same person?

and the aggressive protection of yourself and others? come on, that's just him all over. and he might not swear frequently (although he might have if gotham was more risque) he does yell. a lot. and what extreme screaming match isn't complete without a few good fuck shit cock ass bastards in the mix?

speaking of friends, the loyalty and fierce protection of them would make it easy for him to trust you, which is so important to him. you're obviously a valuable asset in a friendship, and he would treat you as such

it's funny, i always think of oswald (specificalyl in gotham) as louise belcher! very much quick-witted and humorous, which you both are, and he's obviously extremely competitive, with high self-esteem and a belief he can conquer anything. he's not always straight-froward though, but that's something you can bring to the relationship that he can benefit from

he would understand the isolation and the cold attitude also though. it's a good facade to maintain when you're around new people, especially if you find it difficult to trust or open yourself up to them. a safety mechanism almost. it ties in with the holding yourself to a high-standard. he's dead set on being the king of gotham, a position he would gladly share with you if you could assist him in that professional and personable journey, which by the way, faking it till you make it? he's very familiar with it, umbrella boy to mayor after all

i doubt he'd feel the need to hide his emotions around someone like you who was so similar to him and so trustworthy, but he does that around others and wouldn't blame you for a second for trying not to be vulnerable around him, though he'd hope you'd warm up eventually

and please, your negative traits are all ones he holds in high-esteem within himself so get ready to have your ego boosted by him constantly praising you

[taylorftparamore]

i feel insane every time people act like taylor hate can never be based in misogyny. like, because they hate taylor for reasons unrelated to misogyny (ie, her private jet and her new billionaire status, both of which are valid critiques of her class status as a wealthy white american woman and the benefits she reaps from classism and us imperialism but like... imo that means you shouldn't listen to ANY white rich american artists and i guarantee you that some of your indie faves are actually rich), there can be no misogynistic critiques of taylor

like i was deadass reading right wing folks who insist taylor swift is a secret trans woman out to ruin our kids with lgbt agenda and like. that is a transmisgynstic reason for hating taylor. taylor might not be an actual trans woman, but she is literally being hated for a transmisogynstic reason. similarly, saying she's simply TOO MEAN to her ex boyfriends for.... writing about her feelings in a diaristic songwriting format? calling her calculated and manipulative for... writing songs about her personal life? those are all misogynistic reasons to hate her!

like yes. there are reasons to hate her that are unrelated to misogyny. but just because some taylor hate isn't misgynstic, doesn't mean no hate about taylor is just pure misogyny. and it's weird to call it white feminism to say the slut shaming and backlash taylor faced early in her career before she was ever a billionaire private jet owner was not just pure sexism. like for god's sake, people accused her of NOT WRITING HER OWN SONGS because they believed some teenage girl couldn't POSSIBLY write as good as she did.

and it's also weird to pretend taylor has NEVER faced misogyny when going up against record label companies. sony deadass shut her down when she said she wanted to record her debut album when she was 13 and force her to give up her songs to them to give to other artists. scott brocheta specifically talked about 14 year old taylor swift as being "pretty" like that was her only accomplishment. she was literally shut out of the process of buying her own master's and then told why won't she just fuckin shut up and take the abuse?? like... it is so WEIRD that people pretend that sexism stops existing when high profile women face it.

and to taylor haters: this isn't to say you have to like her. but i am BEGGING y'all to stop pretending that taylor hate can never, ever be misogynistic.

[terrortwinz]

1. I don’t really reread books - I like savoring in that first time read feeling for… ever. But I will reread my favorite book “The Host” by Stephenie Meyer any time. But I don’t make much of a habit of it so I can’t say I’ve reread it more than, like, 3 times.

I am, however, a preschool teacher so I can read “Pete the Cat and his Four Groovy Buttons” and “Dragons Love Tacos” from memory (in my sleep!) because I read them all the time.

2. “The Host” -Stephenie Meyer, “Little Women” -Louisa May Alcott, “Hunger Games” series - Suzanne Collins, “Romeo and Juliet” - William Shakespeare. My #5 tends to fluctuate. Right now it’s “Conversation with Friends” by Sally Rooney.

3. That’s a great question because I know I’m aging out of my old reliable Young Adult. I’m flirting with Romance and Mystery, but good ol’ fashioned Fiction is calling to me at the moment.

4. The aforementioned sections but always the children’s books for anything worth exposing my kiddos too and lately I’m taking an interest in biographies as well as humor.

5. Barnes & Noble and Amazon are basically my only two options for new books. I do love perusing Half Price Bookstore when I’m in town. I’m 100% devoted to physical books only. Audiobooks are reserved for long car rides or really difficult old books I’m assigned to read for a class.

6. I’m on summer break and decided to detach from screens (it’s obvs going well) and I read “Mollys Game” by Molly Bloom, “Wishful Drinking” and “The Princess Diarist” by Carrie Fisher in the last few days. I’m trying to pick the next book to read and I’m being too picky again.

7. No. I started reading for pleasure in high school when I was assigned to read “Speak” by Laurie Halse Anderson and it moved me for a long time. Then shortly thereafter the Harry Potter movement took over and it was really cool to read alongside my mother each year one would come out. (But tbh, the enormity of the fan movement leaves a sour taste in my mouth so I’ve been trying to deconstruct and forget as much as I can so I can possibly enjoy a reread in the future.)

8. Are kid books a viable answer? Because it’s “It Looked Like Spilt Milk”. If not then I guess it was a school book I was assigned to read in elementary school. One of my early favorites was “Where the Red Ferns Grow”

9. I don’t know. When I have the time, dedication, and motivation. I read more when I’m invested in a book. I read less when I’m consumed in other things (a tv show, video games).

10. YES. I LOVE smutty books. My favorites mostly come from Mia Sheridan. She has a gift. There this two-fer and I love them both A LOT. They’re called “Becoming Calder” and “Finding Eden”. In the first one, they’re teens in a cult - Eden is a teen bride for a cult leader (gross) but she is enamored with Calder, a teen in the cult. They sneak off together and flirt and ponder what they’re going to do as she’s betrothed as is her duty. In the second one, it’s like 5-years later post events of the first book and UGH it’s gooooood. I love it.

11. I’m getting into biographies and memoirs. One that I think deserves more of a push is “You’ll Never Believe What Happened to Lacey” by Amber Ruffin. It is full of little stories or essays about everyday racism and it’s poignant to me because the setting is in my hometown of Omaha so I know it well.

12. Yes! I think I mentioned “Where the Red Fern Grows” as one of the few school books that resonated with me. Read it in 6th grade. The other major one was “Speak” by Laurie Halse Anderson. I read it in 10th grade and it fucked me up. I realized there was a new section of books called the Young Adult and it never existed before and now it’s got stuff and it wasn’t NEARLY as pretentious as fiction books at the time seemed. I became a reader.

13. Yes, ma’am. I have no idea how to direct you to my profile but I am always looking for new “friends” to piggy back off of and get new recs!

14. NO. Only as a last resort out of desperation because I have no other way to mark the page. I’m a habitual receipt or straw wrapper bookmarker.

15. Refer back to 10 and 11.

16. Sadly only 4, and three of them were in the past three days. I’ve been haunted by “Conversations with Friends” for many months now and it made it hard to move on when I was still 😍😍😍 about that one. I did quick read a YA winter-themed books before I did a major bookshelf purge. It was meh.

17. I’m on this!! “Pete the Cat” (white shoes/groovy buttons/pizza party - all gems), “Dragons Love Tacos”, “Brown Bear, Brown Bear”, “Very Hungry Caterpillar” and “The Way I Am”

18. Generally no. The best I can do is like geography books or kids nonfiction fact books about animals. I can’t really get into historical books much.

19. Ummm I don’t know how to answer this. I tend to read books being turned into movie/tv projects because (the books are better always) it helps me find new things to read that largely won’t be a waste of my time. So while I do read popular books I also don’t? I can’t really answer this one fully.

20. I just need a better way of getting book recs other than books being adapted to the screen. I like a love story but lately I don’t want it being the whole story - I like the story to be largely about something else and the characters couldn’t help falling for each other during it. I like mystery too. A good thriller is fun. I like post-apocalyptic settings too. Lately I want to be challenged - “Convos with Friends” challenged how I view love and sex. “Such a fun age” helped me see other subtle forms of racism.

book asks:

book you’ve reread the most times?

top 5 books of all time?

what is your favourite genre?

what sections of a bookstore do you browse?

where do you buy books?

what books have you read in the last month?

is there a series/book that got you into reading?

what is the first book you remember reading yourself?

when do you tend to read most?

do you have a guilty fav?

what non-fiction books do you like if any?

did you enjoy any compulsory high school readings?

do you have a goodreads?

do you ever mark/dog ear books you own?

recommend and review a book.

how many books have you read this year?

top 5 children’s books?

do you like historical books? which time period?

most disliked popular books?

what are things you look for in a book?

[lauvra]

30/12/2024 I'm sure there are loads more ways I need to die on this journey before my path makes significant enough sense to me, but one thing I've been dwelling on over the past few weeks is the ways I lose or betray my voice and how to determine when my silence is a necessary phase of reflection to honour and delve into vs. a mere product of insecurity to cast aside or push through. I wrote a piece a while ago attempting to share examples of times I've lost my voice throughout life and I've wanted to delete the thing ever since posting it. It wasn't written as well as it could have been, the ways I tried to work around my struggle with tense was shotty but it was done as well as it could have been at that time and my focus was on getting it out. I'm too aware of the tangential elements that I haven't drawn into an adequate throughline but the idea of revision currently makes me sick. I've just backspaced a post's worth of ranting here, everything I write just drives me fucking crazy at the moment. I am truly sick of myself, I think it's a sign I've gotta get a life so it's definitely partially an important silence, but I've become overly self conscious about the kind of writer I am, too. I'd gained permission from internal writers like Lispector, diaristic writers like Ernaux and ones self proclaimed "lacking in imagination" like Anne Carson, but suddenly my head has filled with the voices of bitter people with bulk sale mindsets who claim only famous people have lives and perspectives worth reading about. Well, I read perfect stranger's ruminations all the time online and grow to love them through their honest self explorations. If they wrote a book, I'd buy one because I've come to care, so I know that's not an idea worthy entirely of scorn. All of my writing is a practise in development for when something real enough happens. So that then I may have become a worthy vessel--yes, that's icky and yes I mean it. There are ways I need to die, attachments I need to loosen my grip on, more silences to soap myself with and maybe I should even sink back into and inhale. I dunno, maybe I'm already finished here. It's easy to feel that way. This is the battle. When I zoom out and imagine my life as a cartoon, all of this becomes silly--I picture scary men as if badly drawn tossing furniture and violent crashing is instantly replaced by comical doink's, personal humiliations turn G-Rated through the descending sound effect wah-wah-wahhhhh. See, just like this, I talk myself off the ledge, into an alternate reality where tomorrow's a stand alone episode free from all the run-ons of the past. Each day another GAMEOVER--TRY AGAIN?

[wavesoutbeingtossed]

It's gonna get really uncomfortable in here if she keeps being unclear about the muses and making it a open debate and continuing the discomfort everyone has with the mash ups she's been doing for months now. It will be fun for me though. As a creative sort who has had to rethink their own art in the shade + light of relevations in my own life. I hope she is so happy and inspired she can go back to writing more abstractly with plausible deniability and with open metaphor-story and the Folklore-Evermore-Anthology series.

I’m sorry if that’s the experience you’ve had, but I haven’t found it particularly uncomfortable for that reason on tumblr. I think everything depends on how you curate your dash and what you choose to give energy to, and I don’t give mine to that stuff. There are certainly topics I don’t feel particularly comfortable talking about because they’re delicate and I don’t feel like this is the appropriate forum for it or because things get weird, sure, but that’s not on Taylor, that’s on the people consuming her music. I don’t think you meant it this way, but again, if people are uncomfortable with what she puts out, that’s on them to explore why it does and to reconcile it, but Taylor is allowed to write about whatever she wants however she wants, whether it’s diaristic or fictional or a mix of both. One doesn’t invalidate the other.

This isn’t directed at you, but I really don’t understand the argument that she needs to be clear about anything. No other artist is under the same scrutiny about what they write about, and Taylor only is by her fans because she was open about being personal at the beginning of her career and it stuck. But so are many other artists, yet nobody cares about their inspiration. I can tell you I don’t think about muses about any other artist I listen to, and I rarely did about Taylor until I dipped my toes into online fandom around Lover and more seriously during folkmore. Sometimes I wish I could go back to that time lol, although not really because I’ve had so many wonderful, insightful conversations here about so many of those experiences.

I would never wish for Taylor to restrict what she can write about in the way she wants to write. Whether it’s confessional or prose, that’s up to her. I don’t think there’s correlation between her happiness and how diaristic her music is. I love her fictional and allegorical writing and would welcome more of it (evermore followed by folklore followed by the Anthology are my favourite albums), but her diaristic writing is so powerful because it’s universal in its uniqueness too and I cherish those songs just as much.

Do I complain sometimes about how there are things I wish I could talk about but don’t feel I can here? Sure. But that’s not because of Taylor’s writing, it’s because of how the internet doesn’t leave room for nuance or critical thinking a lot of the time and how it’s not a place for dialogue so much as a soapbox. (As i am doing here, for instance.)

TL;DR: Taylor doesn’t owe anyone anything.

And with that, I’d like to move on from the topic, thanks!