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allfiredupproject · 3 years ago

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PETER BLAKE’S ARTICE IN DORSET LIFE EXPLORES CARTER’S TILES!

Peter Blake’s Article in Dorset Life on Carter’s Tiles! A fantastic read!

Carter’s Tile Manufactory

Peter Blake looks at the origins of the company that would become Poole Pottery

Published in August ’16

The famous ‘Welcome to Poole’ sign at Sandbanks

How many of the millions of commuters and tourists who use the London Underground every year give a thought to their surroundings, in particular the countless tiles which line the tunnels and decorate the stations? Very few, I am sure. If any do, perhaps they would be surprised to know just how many were produced in Dorset, a county not always considered to be in the forefront of manufacturing output. However, a small part of Poole was a major player in the production of tiles and other ceramics used in the building trade for nearly 100 years. This is the story of Jesse Carter and his family, and their impact on Poole from the 1870s onwards. Dorset clay has been used for pottery for thousands of years. Indeed, some of the earliest fragments of fired pottery which have been found locally go back to the Neolithic period, c. 3000 years BC. The clay was mainly used by local potters until the 18th century, when improving transport links led to an increased demand for the fine white plastic ball clay from potteries all over the country. The following century saw a massive building boom, with the associated demand for ceramics for the building trade, such as roof tiles, chimney pots, drainpipes, and floor and decorative tiles. To meet this need, a number of potteries sprang up around Poole.

Lovely detailing on this corner building at Julian Terrace in Southbourne, Bournemouth

One such was the Patent Architectural Pottery Company, founded in Hamworthy in 1854 to supply high-quality goods for the better class of builders. James Walker, an employee of this company, decided to branch out on his own, and around 1860 set up the Walker Patent Encaustic and Mosaic Ornamental Brick and Tile Manufactory on East Quay, Poole. He fairly quickly got into financial difficulties and came to the attention of Jesse Carter, an enterprising businessman who visited Poole often in the course of his work as a partner in an ironmongers’ and builders’ merchants in Weybridge, Surrey. He saw the potential for the ailing business and acquired the site, by now derelict, in 1873, renaming it Carter’s Industrial Tile Manufactory, later to become Carter & Co, with a subsidiary company called Carter Stabler and Adams being established in 1921, which eventually became the worldwide success that was renamed Poole Pottery in 1963. Born in 1830 in Abbots Worthy, the son of a bricklayer, Jesse Carter benefited from the building boom of the 19th century. A journeyman bricklayer in 1851, by 1861 he was a builder employing 49 men and five boys. There are records in Hampshire Record Office of a number of land sales involving Carter in the Winchester area during this period, and it is likely that he did well out of the growing demand for land in an area which was developing rapidly, with a big increase in the demand for housing following the opening of the railway station in 1839. In 1871 he was living in Weybridge, but moved to Poole soon after acquiring the pottery site, living first in Market Street, then later in West End House, a very imposing Georgian residence, which still stands. He began to expand the range of tiles produced at the pottery, alongside the old ‘Carter’s red’ floor tiles, producing more decorative glazed, modelled and painted wall tiles for the growing interior design market. By the middle of the 1880s, the business was thriving, and Jesse took three of his sons, Charles, Owen and Ernest into the company, Ernest sadly dying in 1887 of rheumatic fever at the age of 27. With the involvement of his sons in the business, Jesse started to take a less active part in the day-to-day running of the pottery and moved to West Cliff Road in Bournemouth, Owen taking up residence in West End House.

The Norton Free Library (now a Wetherspoons pub)

Owen was the driving force behind the introduction of decorative pieces and tableware into the repertoire of the pottery, in his capacity as Art and Technical Director. A friend and admirer of William de Morgan, who designed tiles for William Morris, Owen set up a potter’s wheel in a stable at the rear of West End House, where he started experimenting with the development of ornamental wares. In 1912, production of the more straightforward floor and wall tiles was shifted to the Hamworthy sites owned by the pottery, with the East Quay site concentrating on the more artistic end of the spectrum. Owen’s involvement with what became the world famous Poole Pottery ended with his death in 1919. Carter and Co produced their tiles over a period of nearly 100 years, from 1873 until the company was merged into Pilkington Tiles Ltd in 1964. In 1962, production was estimated to be 100,000 tiles per week, with the tunnel ovens on site using more gas than the whole of Salisbury.

The Poole coat of arms on Poole Bridge

Although the ornamental ware received more attention, the plainer output of the pottery was vital to the continuing success of the business. Carter’s supplied many of the tiles which line the London underground tunnels. They also produced relief tiles for the decoration of the stations, for example Bethnal Green, depicting London scenes. Carter’s was also responsible for the platform tiling for the Victoria line. The company produced blue plaques put up by the LCC, and later the GLC, for many years until they stopped making them in 1981. Other bread and butter work was also important, if unglamorous. The supply of glazed bricks and ceramic tiles for commercial premises such as pubs, butchers, cinemas and the like provided a lucrative business, allowing the more decorative side of the pottery to develop and flourish. Fortunately, a number of examples of these ornate frontages and signs still exist in our area, for example: the Branksome Arms, Commercial Road, Bournemouth, which is Grade II listed; the Goat and Tricycle in Westhill Road, Bournemouth (previously the Pembroke Arms); Westbourne Cinema (now Westbourne Club Grand Bingo); Jenkins and Sons, a 1920s butchers and fishmongers at Penn Hill, Parkstone (still called Jenkins and Sons, but now a café bar, with the facade preserved); the Welcome to Poole signs such as the one situated at Sandbanks; the Swan Inn and Poole Arms pub, both in Poole; and the Poole town coats of arms, displayed on Poole Bridge. Other examples can be found fairly close at hand, for example New Milton, Salisbury, Romsey and Portsmouth. Poole Museum would also be a good starting point for anyone interested in finding out more about Carter and Co’s output. For more detailed information, please look at the Facebook page of the Tile Lady, a local expert who provides illustrated talks and undertakes guided tours giving information about noteworthy buildings and tiled features in the Bournemouth and Poole area. If visiting any of these sites, try to do so on a sunny day, just after rain if possible, as the coloured tiles will be seen to their best advantage then, taking on jewel-like qualities.

The front of Jenkin and Son in Parkstone

The Carter family had a long-lasting impact on the life and times of Poole, continuing right up to the modern day. As well as employing people at Carter’s and later Poole Pottery, another of Jesse’s sons, William, took over the ailing Kinson Pottery in 1884, making it a going concern. His son, Herbert Spencer Carter, OBE JP, went on to be Mayor of Poole five times, the first time in 1912 at the age of 32. In 1946, Herbert Carter Secondary School was opened, named in his honour. Still operating, now as Carter Community School, this establishment has educated many thousands of Poole’s children. Poole Pottery has attracted well-deserved fame for the innovative design and use of colour in its ceramics, spreading the name of Poole throughout the world and attracting countless visitors to its premises. Although the bulk of the manufacturing is now carried out at Middleport pottery in Staffordshire, new designs are still created, fired and painted in the Studio Pottery on Poole Quay, continuing the tradition going back over a century.

The Swan Inn in Poole

Jesse Carter died in 1927 at the grand old age of 96. Little can he have thought when he first saw a derelict and failing pottery in 1873, that the company he founded would have such a profound effect not only on his own family, but on the town of Poole as well. www.poolepottery.co.uk

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svtxsoju · 4 years ago

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02. morning glory fizz | dear miss soju

ღ Synopsis: College is hard. Love is even harder. Good thing the students of Mansae University can write in to Miss Soju, the campus’ very own romance advice columnist! The only problem is she’s never been in a relationship. Ever. There’s no telling what kind of chaos she may cause in the love lives of several of MU’s most eligible bachelors. Too bad no one knows who she really is! ღ Characters/Pairings: college AU! Seventeen & OC’s, Joshua x baking major!OC, and more TBA! ღ Genre: Romantic Comedy, Slice of Life ღ Warning(s): Mentions of alcohol, suggestions of sex, language ღ Word Count: 4.9k words ღ Binu’s Note: a week late but better late than never i guess 😌 i’ve been avoiding tumblr to finish writing this, but i just kept getting distracted by choi seungcheol. hit that mf like button if you relate. i’m so excited for the special album y’all the teasers and concepts are so sadkfklsj i love seventeen

anyway, i apologize not only for the late update, BUT ALSO bc this chapter is also a lot of exposition again 😔🥺 i promise i’m done setting it all up and that some real shit will go down in the next chapter!! hopefully people will still be able to enjoy this chapter huhuhu 😭💗 if you’re reading this, i love u and i hope u have a good weekend!!

《 ⊛ Author’s Note & Credits ⊛ Disclaimer ⊛ Masterlist ⊛ 》

《 Previous ⊛ Next 》

Having already completed the first half of her college career, Joohyun was well aware of the value of sleep. And yet, like most college students, she could never seem to manage a decent sleeping schedule. She had only slept 2 hours when her alarm went off at 5:30AM. She groggily rolled out of bed, mentally cursing her past self for thinking that this was a good idea when clearly, the best idea at the moment was to snuggle back up under her covers and sleep in until afternoon. Only one of her eyes seemed capable of staying open as she pulled on her clothes and got ready for the day. When she suddenly heard the front door close behind her roommate, she cursed out loud, throwing her laptop into her bag before she rushed out the door. She half-wobbled, half-hopped along the second-story walkway while she tried to get her shoes all the way on.

“Bok Bongseon! Wait for me!” Joohyun called out in an aggressive whisper.

“HOLY SHIT! You scared me, Joo!” her roommate, a shorter girl with full cheeks and pouty lips, screamed at full volume. She clutched at her racing heart and leaned against the wall while she caught her breath.

“Shut up, people are still sleeping!” Joohyun linked arms with Bongseon and dragged her down the steps leading to the street. It was still dark outside, but she could already hear the faint bustling of the mart located below their apartment. It was nice to know that they weren’t the only two people in Seoul insane enough to be awake at this hour.

“I thought you were the ghost of my grandma, you bitch! You know she visits me in my dreams to tell me how disappointed she that I’m a baker,” Bongseon said indignantly, though she still cuddled closer to Joohyun when they were hit by the morning chill. Once they reached the street, they both headed towards the train station without having to say a word. “What are you even doing up?”

“I am simply accompanying my favorite roommate to work to make sure that she gets there safely,” Joohyun crooned sweetly, and made kissy faces at the girl, who in turn pinched Joohyun’s lips between her calloused fingers. She tried to protest but could only let out pained whines until she was mercifully released. “Ow!”

“Sorry but I cannot fulfill your roommates to lovers, 12k slowburn fantasy,” Bongseon continued on nonchalantly as they climbed down the steps to the platform. “You had your chance, but I am a taken girl!”

“Oh, so you and Josh are together today?” Joohyun teased. Although it probably wasn’t the best idea, considering her lips were slightly throbbing from the girl’s attack. “I’ll just wait until tomorrow then.”

“Wow, bold words coming from Miss Fish Lips.” Bongseon raised an eyebrow and smiled tauntingly. “Understandable, considering that that was probably the most action your lips have gotten in your entire life. I could probably set it up on a blind date with my fist, if you’d like.”

Joohyun’s laughter echoed off the walls of the mostly empty station, startling the only other person waiting for the morning train (an old woman, who was still half-asleep prior to being rudely awakened by two very loud girls). Bongseon often made some colorful threats, morning or not, but Joohyun was one of the very few people who could be assured that her words were empty. “Don’t you know that it’s rude to stare, lady?” she barked at the old woman, who was openly glaring at them. Everyone else, on the other hand, was subject to Bongseon’s sharp temper.

This even included her boyfriend of approximately 4 years. ‘Approximately’ being the key word, because the two often took breaks-- a natural phenomenon when one partner was easily provoked and the other loved to do the provoking. Jihoon had told Joohyun that the two had met at the cafe in their freshman year, when Bongseon came in as a part-time baker and Joshua was merely a barista trainee. They started dating within a month and moved into an apartment together in two. That went just as well as anyone would expect. By the grace of whatever entity that was chaotic enough to keep their relationship intact, they made it 7 months before nearly breaking things off for good. As luck would have it though, a new hire and his roommate were in the same exact predicament as them. Kind of.

Joohyun shuddered to recall her freshman year when she and Jihoon somehow convinced themselves that it was a good idea to share an apartment. In principle it made sense; they had lived across the street from each other since they were in diapers. Two exhausting months into trying to irritate the other into breaking the lease first, they met Bongseon and Joshua when Jihoon started working at Smile Flower. It didn’t take long for Joohyun to suggest the switch— she would move in with Bongseon and Joshua with Woozi. Just like that, she saved both Bongseon and Joshua’s turbulent romance (temporarily) and her and Woozi’s fractured friendship (now thriving).

She and Bongseon have been roommates ever since, and Joohyun knew her life was a little easier for it.

“Joohyun, you better stop looking at me with those heart eyes before I really act up,” Bongseon warned. They had boarded the train, but hadn’t bothered to sit down since Mansae University station was only two stops away.

“But I just love you so much,” Joohyun pouted, affectionately resting her head on her friend’s shoulder. “What does Joshua have that I don’t?”

“A dick. And that’s about it.”

“Damn you, heterosexuality!”

Bongseon snorted out a laugh. “Seriously Joo, how are you awake right now? You’re only ever this lovey-dovey when you’re severely sleep deprived. I know you don’t have classes until 3PM today. You also don’t have your internship today,” Bongseon narrowed her eyes when Joohyun visibly tensed up at the mention of her current occupation. “Also, since when do you watch Youtube videos until 2am? And don’t think I didn’t notice that all of them were titled ‘Relationship Q&A’s’ and ‘I confessed to my crush and he said this!!!’. Got something to tell me, missy?”

It was so quiet on the train that Joohyun worried that Bongseon could hear all the wires in her brain short-circuit. With Bongseon’s cross-examination skills, it was a wonder why she pursued baking instead of joining her family’s firm. Come on, Joohyun, just tell a white lie. Easy, simple. Don’t need to overcomplicate things. “Oh, uh I— um— well, I j-just thought they were entertaining?” She was done for.

“Right. You thought random couples self-indulgently talking about their love lifes for 40 minutes with default iMovies effects were entertaining.”

“Y-yes?” Joohyun threw in her most convincing smile for good measure, but it did nothing to soften Bongseon’s hard gaze. “It’s my new guilty pleasure, haha!”

“Hm, interesting,” Bongseon was momentarily interrupted by the sound of the arrival bell. Joohyun eagerly pulled her friend towards the exit, hoping that the distance from the train could also get her further away from the topic. Unfortunately for her, Bongseon did not plan on dropping it so soon. “You sure you don’t want to tell me anything, Joo? About your internship?”

Joohyun began to sweat. Was she really that transparent? “Okay, don’t get mad--”

“Don’t get me wrong, I’m super jazzed that you’re getting into relationships and everything, but really Joo? Youtube? You could just talk to me if you need help talking to your new crush at your job!”

“Oh.” Joohyun would have let out a sigh of relief if she wasn’t out of breath from climbing the mountain of stairs up to the sidewalk. “Right. Confessing. To my crush. That I definitely have.”

“It’s okay to admit you have one, Joo. I’m no stranger to workplace romance,” Bongseon said, her breathing completely even. A measly flight of stairs was nothing compared to eight hours of kneading dough. “Who’s the lucky bastard, Joo?”

“Well, I’m not sure I would call it a workplace romance, per se…” Joohyun laughed nervously. There was no way she could stick another clean landing if she kept talking.

“Shut up, I bet that guy is in love with you already. Who wouldn’t fall for the only editing intern at The Front?”

“Haha, I don’t know…” Probably no one, because the only editing intern at The Front doesn’t exist?

Joohyun could not be more relieved to see the small store front of Smile Flower Cafe. It was one amongst the many cafes located near campus, but Joohyun felt like nothing really matched its comforting home-like ambience. But that probably had less to do with the soft wooden floors and pastel ceramic mugs, and more owed to the three years Joohyun had spent hanging around there, usually bothering Jihoon and joking around with Josh.

The two boys already stood waiting at the cafe’s entrance, too bleary-eyed to notice Joohyun and Bongseon quickly approaching. “Hey, ugly!” Joohyun called out, snickering when both of them turned to look at her.

“What the hell, why are you awake?”

“Good morning to you too, Jihoon,” she answered, blowing him a kiss. “I’m actually here to see you, believe it or not. Don’t you feel special?”

“Oh? That’s interesting, because you told me that you came here for me,” Bongseon broke away from exchanging actual kisses with Joshua to look between Joohyun and Jihoon in a way that Joohyun did not like too much. “I guess it wasn’t a workplace romance after all.”

Joshua mirrored his girlfriend’s implicating expression as he unlocked the front door, simply because he knew it made his friends squirm. “Wow Joohyun, you woke up this early just to talk to Jihoon? You really couldn’t wait to see him, huh?”

“Uh, yes because I need his help—”

“Ah, his help, gotcha! Come on, Bongseon, I’ll go help you in the kitchen while these two help each other out here,” Joshua snickered. Before Joohyun or Jihoon could roast the couple in retaliation, they had already disappeared behind the counter.

After years of similar taunts, all Jihoon could do was shake his head. “Okay Joo, what is so important that you need my help at 6 in the morning?”

“I wrote my first response last night!” Joohyun whispered excitedly, taking out her laptop from her bag. “Well, a few hours ago. I wanted to show you before continuing on with the rest! Here, look.”

① Dear Miss Soju,

I just started my first year at MU and she’s an exchange student from New York. We met at a party and talked for two hours about comics, aliens, anything we could think of. It was perfect. She even asked me to walk her home. When the time came for me to make a move though, I kind of dropped the ball. Since we had just met that night, I didn’t want to come off too strong. Now I really regret it - I don’t even have her phone number. I feel like such an idiot! I can’t stop thinking about her, but I don’t even know if I’ll ever talk to her again. Did I make myself seem disinterested? Will we meet again? Will she even remember me?

Sincerely,

Big Cringy Idiot

She let Jihoon read the asker’s message first, then scrolled down to show her answer.

Dear Big Cringy Idiot,

You and your crush seem to have a lot in common. There is nothing wrong with being nervous around someone you like. In fact, it is fairly normal and is a good sign that you like this girl very much. She also seems open to any future possiblities, since she did ask you to take her home. You need not worry about coming off too strong in this situation, although I do admire your dedication to respecting women’s boundaries. I hope you are able to find this girl again so that you can truly tell her how you feel. Best of luck to you!

Sincerely,

Miss Soju

“Joo, that was…”

“Poetic, beautiful, life-changing?” Joohyun grinned, and nudged her best friend with each suggestion.

“Boring. It was boring.” Joohyun’s face fell, and Jihoon could only offer the girl an apologetic smile. “Dude, you’re gonna put people to sleep if you keep it up like this. I almost took out a pillow to take a nap on the floor.”

“But this is how I write my articles— Informative and concise! How else am I supposed to write it?”

“I mean, that’s great for reporting articles, but this is an advice column. It’s supposed to be fun, sarcastic maybe. Like your promo piece! That was good.”

“I wrote that as a joke, hoping they would fire me for it,” Joohyun admitted, eyes wide in panic as she looked at her best friend.

“Huh. Well, I think it would sound better than this Wikipedia article you got going on,” Jihoon shrugged. “Try to be fun!”

“I am fun!” Joohyun cried out defensively, her nostrils flaring with passion. When Jihoon responded with a doubtful look, she let out a dramatic gasp and snatched up her laptop, stomping over to her favorite corner in the cafe. “I can be fun! I’ll show you fun!”

“Atta girl,” Jihoon’s signature cackle filled the cafe, further fueling the girl’s aggressive typing.

Just another morning in the life of So Joohyun.

To the surprise of the cafe’s current occupants, a student already tapped at the glass entrance, clearly in desperate need of his morning americano. He had walked all the way from the freshman dorms after a restless night of tossing and turning. When his phone screen told him it was already 6:05AM, he decided to just give up on sleep altogether. So there he was, trying to start off his day right, at Smile Flower Cafe, only to be stopped at the door by the grumpy barista with the red hair. He always felt like the other one was way nicer, especially since he would go out of his way to sneak him free cookie samples and made pleasant small talk while ringing him up (what was his name? Jonathan?).

All the red-haired barista ever did was scowl at him when he asked for a student discount. Now, he scowled at him as he gestured at the sign that indicated that the cafe would not be open until 7AM. The fatigued freshman had half a mind to make some choice gestures of his own, but he refrained and just whipped out his phone instead. He gave the mean barista one last pout before turning around and walking towards the 24-hour convenience store on campus.

➠ [ to: vernonie 😌😎 ] Good morning king. Are you still on your shift ?

➠ [ from: vernonie 😌😎 ] gm seungkwan pls k*ll me

Seungkwan took that as a yes. It didn’t take long for him to arrive, the entrance bell ringing lightly when he stepped into the small store. At the register sat his roommate, who was clearly fighting to keep his eyes open. “Wol-cuh ‘n—” he tried to greet through a wide-mouthed yawn. “Excuse me, welcome in! Oh, hey Seungkwan.”

Seungkwan answered with a grunt and headed straight for the refrigerated coffee section, choosing the largest can.

“Uh dude, you good? You look like—”

“Like I haven’t slept all night? I am aware,” He immediately opened his coffee and took a long gulp of the beverage in hopes of feeling even a little better. When it did nothing after 30 seconds, he frowned at the concerned cashier. “Vernon, I will not be paying for this drink, because it is clearly defective. Coffee is supposed to fix everything.”

“Is this about your audition today?” Vernon asked, eyebrows furrowed. “Your monologue sounded really solid last night though. Your audition songs were great too. You totally got this in the bag!”

“It’s not just about the audition, sweet Vernon,” Seungkwan sighed. “It’s about who I’m going to see at the audition. I still don’t know what the fuck I’m going to do.”

“Oh yeah, you are probably going to see them later.” For the past week, all Seungkwan could talk about was the theater tech sophomore that he had met at the theater department’s welcome party. They had sat beside Seungkwan and had helped him through all the fast-paced drinking games, and even took some of his shots when he kept losing. Surely, this was what love felt like.

That was what Seungkwan hoped anyway, because whatever it was made him feel all warm and tingly inside (or it could have just been the alcohol). Nevertheless, he had made big plans to confess to his crush as soon as possible. His dilemma for the past several days was merely a matter of how it would be done. “Not probably! I know for a fact that they will be there, because they told me that they couldn’t wait to see me,” Seungkwan let out a wail and slumped over the counter. “They’re the sweetest, most beautiful person to ever walk the earth and I just want to tell them that I would actually jump off a bridge for them. Why is that so difficult?”

Vernon nodded sympathetically as he always did. “I mean, if you’re not ready today, maybe you could wait?”

“Wait?! No offense babe, but last time I checked, waiting didn’t get you anywhere,” Seungkwan said, patting his roommate’s arm. Vernon cringed as he was forced to remember his own romantic blunder from the past week. “Clearly, we are both in major need of help. That Woozi guy’s show didn’t do anything for us! Also, we still haven’t heard from that Miss Soju character and it’s been what? Two days? If she’s such an expert, she would know that love is time sensitive!”

“Ugh, I know. I keep refreshing The Front’s website just to see if she’s posted it yet.” Vernon sighed forlornly, which was a common punctuation to his sentences lately. “It’s getting me really antsy. What if she doesn’t even choose to answer our emails this time?”

Seungkwan quickly covered the other freshman’s mouth. “Don’t say that! The universe manifests what we say will happen. We should ask for divine intervention instead.” He cleared his throat in preparation and threw his hands up to the sky. “O Eros, god of love, please shine your blessings down upon my and Vernonie’s love lives for we are but two humble, clueless freshmen in need of romantic guidance. Send down two of your swiftest, sharpest arrows, so that those that we desire may hear your soft whispers—”

Ding. The sound of the entrance bell rang once more, stopping Seungkwan’s prayer short, much to his irritation. “Is this a bad time?” the new customer, an ethereally handsome blonde, asked amusedly. He strode into the store and grabbed two spicy tuna triangle kimbab’s before approaching the counter.

“Jeonghan hyung!”

“Ah, Vernon!” Jeonghan smiled. “I didn’t know you worked here. You should come by my and Cheol’s apartment again soon, that was fun!”

“Hyung, this is my roommate that I told you about-- Seungkwan. And Seungkwan, this is Seungcheol hyung’s roommate,” Vernon said all while ringing up Jeonghan’s food. On the side, Seungkwan bowed sheepishly after unfreezing from his previous pose. “How’s your morning going? You wake up pretty early!”

Jeonghan laughed heartily, shaking his head. “Oh no, I just finished an all-night stream. I just came by to get a snack before heading to bed. Seems like you two have been having a fun morning, though. Do you two always start your day off by praying to the ancient Greek god of desire?”

Seungkwan flushed a deep pink. “Uh no, it was more like a cry of desperation. Vernon and I are having a pretty tough time confessing to our crushes, so I figured we should just try out anything that might help us. Nothing else seems to be working…”

“Wait, that’s so cute,” Jeonghan cooed.

“Would you be able to give us some advice, hyung?” Vernon asked. He didn’t know anything about the senior’s love life, but he did give off the vibe of someone who would know… a lot.

Jeonghan’s eyes twinkled dangerously, a lazy smirk on his lips. “I mean, I could go talk to your little crushes for you, if you’d like. I’m sure I could get some sort of response out of them.”

One look at Jeonghan had Vernon and Seungkwan shaking their heads vehemently.

“No, we’re good.”

“Yeah, no thanks.”

“Mm, good call.” Jeonghan took his food from the counter, and winked at the two boys. “I really wish I could help you both more, but I’m sure you’ll get what you’re waiting for soon! Today, if you want it enough.”

There was something in the way that the senior stated those words that made Seungkwan believe him without a question. It wasn’t a naive suggestion or an optimistic prediction; Jeonghan spoke like it was the truth plainly written on the walls. He finally felt a long-awaited wave exhaustion wash over his anxieties, softening them until they fizzled away alongside the ebbing foam. All that was left behind were grains of sand. Suddenly, Seungkwan yawned, and he wanted nothing more than to curl up in his twin bed at the dorms.

“Well, I should be heading off to bed! Looks like you should be too, Seungkwan,” Jeonghan said, suppressing his own yawn. The freshman nodded in agreement. He definitely needed to rest up— this was going to be a big day, after all.

“Say hi to Cheol hyung for me when you get home!” Vernon said.

Jeonghan hummed thoughtfully as he made his way back to the entrance of the store. “I will if he’s there! He didn’t come home last night.” He turned to leave the boys with one last sleepy smile, seeming to laugh at something only he knew.

“At least one of us is doing something right.”

“Jihoon, why can’t I get this right?”

“I’m sorry! This just sounds nothing like you,” Jihoon shrugged. It had been a rather busy morning, but things slowed down as it approached noon, giving him the chance to look at Joohyun’s fourth draft of responses. “I’ve never heard you say stuff like ‘rad’ or ‘hella’... Like are you aware that you sound like a skater from the late 90’s?”

“That’s because the reference I’ve been using is from 1997!” Joohyun huffed in frustration. She was already backspacing albeit with a little more force than necessary. “I wasn’t even born in ‘97!”

“Exactly, so stop trying to write like that. What if you tried to—”

“Eat my ass, Hong!” The sound of the kitchen door slamming open interrupted Jihoon’s (probably unhelpful) suggestion, and the two best friends watched as Bongseon stormed out of the cafe in a familiar rage. Luckily, there were no customers to witness it this time.

Instinctively, they looked to the kitchen door, where Joshua stood with a resigned smile on his full lips. “Oops,” he said, scratching at the back of his neck apologetically. “Guess it was too soon to joke about our last break. Sorry about that, Jihoon. I’ll try to call in the head baker early to finish up the rest of the pastries for today.”

He walked over to where they sat and plopped himself across from Joohyun. She offered Joshua a look of sympathy, but he responded by twisting his face up in a dumb expression, reassuring her that he was just fine. Still, she couldn’t help feeling worried for both of her friends. No matter how many times Bongseon and Joshua broke it off and no matter how much Joohyun joked about it, she knew that their strong feelings for each other meant that it hurt a little every time they got into a fight. At least, that’s what she gathered from the various nights she spent soothing Bongseon while the girl cried into a toilet bowl, soju bottle still in hand.

“It’s okay, Josh, you probably don’t have to worry too much. Knowing her, she’ll probably be back in 30 minutes to make up with you and then Jihoon will have to find someone to take over your shift,” Joohyun piped up. “But please take it back to your apartment this time, because I don’t make enough money to have every surface of my apartment sanitized again.”

Joshua let out an easy laugh, as though he were not a man in deep shit. “Thank you, Joo. You always know what to say to make me feel better,” he sighed. “I should probably go after her. I’ll be back soon, Jihoon!”

She waited for him to disappear out the door before turning to her best friend. “Wow, that’s gotta be a new record for them, right? I didn’t even know they got back together until this morning.” Joohyun was surprised to find that Jihoon had been silently staring at her for a good minute now. “...Why are you looking at me?”

“What you said to Joshua,” Jihoon simply replied.

“Oh, I was only joking about the sanitation thing. I just walked in on them once in the kitchen—“

“No I mean, how you said it. Maybe that’s how you should be writing your responses.” Jihoon grinned, watching as Joohyun gave him that look again, the one where she looks at him like he’s speaking from a third head. But he knew that this was going to be another Jihoon Genius moment, which seemed to be happening more frequently lately, much to his satisfaction. “Like you’re talking to one of your friends. I mean, it made Josh feel better, right?”

Joohyun’s eyebrows scrunched together and she mulled the idea over. Without another word to Jihoon, she began to slowly type on her laptop, gradually tapping faster and faster as she gained momentum. Her best friend giddily returned to his place behind the counter to tend to the customers that just walked in. He knew that once she got into a groove, there was no hope of stopping her.

An hour later, Joohyun finally pushed away her laptop and waited for Jihoon to finish wiping down a table before calling him over. For some reason, she was anxious to show him the final product and even when he already sat besie her, she hesitated for a beat. Usually, her writing was professional and objective, always ending with a declarative period. She had spent years perfecting her reporting style so that when she presented the facts, that’s all they were. This, however, felt personal, like it was a part of her. And even though Jihoon probably knew her even better than herself sometimes, there was something so vulnerable about showing someone a side of her that she had only just discovered.

And yet, she was curious to know— desperate to know: was it any good?

“Well?” Joohyun watched for Jihoon’s reaction closely, both impatient and terrified to hear his thoughts.

“Joohyun, this...” Jihoon started slowly. She braced for impact. “This is it. I think you’ve found Miss Soju’s voice.”

She exhaled. “R-really?”

“Yes, really. You answered the questions so thoughtfully, so you know it’s not just some generic bullshit you found on the internet. Plus, it was fun to read, like I think I’d read this even if I didn’t send a letter in,” Jihoon gushed, all while skimming over the words again. He turned to smile brightly at her, reminding Joohyun of a much younger Jihoon back in their elementary school days. “Most importantly though, it’s so you.”

Joohyun returned the smile, just as brightly. Warmth bloomed in her chest and across her cheeks. “Thanks, Jihoon, I don’t know what I would do without you.”

“Honestly, me neither,” Jihoon laughed.

“Um, can I ask you one more thing though?” Joohyun scrolled down to the last two entries, both of which asked for advice on how to make things official with a guy they’ve been talking to. The two letters were extremely similar in detail, but had been sent from two different emails and two different signatures. At first, she thought that maybe her judgement was muddled by her lack of sleep, and as the day went on, she figured her inability to recognize any nuance between the two letters was thanks her lack of experience.

There was just something about the way they had described the boy. She knew that intelligent, funny, kind-hearted, and unbelievably handsome were pretty generic adjectives. But what were the odds for both letters to also mention his infectious laugh and deep, dark eyes? “Do you think these two are from the same person? I’m trying to go for a confession theme for this article, so I included them both, but I’m afraid they’re too similar.”

Jihoon read them over a couple of times, then shrugged. “They do sound pretty similar, but a lot of people go through that sort of thing. Also, so many people describe their crushes like that, but let’s be real, most of them end up being fuckboys. So trust me, both those people probably need your help. I mean, what’s the harm in publishing both, right?”

“Yeah, I guess you’re right,” Joohyun bit her lip, needing every ounce of reassurance she could get from her best friend. She read over her writing once, twice, thrice more. This was it. No more edits and no more excuses. Her finger hovered over the mousepad. “Okay, I”m going to send it in for approval now. Jihoon, you are about to witness me publish my first article for The Front.”

Joohyun took a deep breath and clicked. Finally.

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itsnotsuposedtobeaboutyou · 7 years ago

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4/12/18 So today I tried to follow one line of thought and hell if I know what happened

K, what are you thinking?

Fuck. Idk man… There’s always gonna be a lot I have to do, in my eyes. It’s never gonna be perfect. But that wasn’t really the goal anyway. So it’s just an unresolvable mess. Tangles that I wish I could untangle but can’t.

Why to you want to untangle them?

Because then they wouldn’t cloud up my head so much? They wouldn’t be mysteries. I’d have solved them.

Do you consider yourself to be a detective?

I don’t know. Like a lot of things, I like the idea. But I don’t think I have the skills.

What do you want? From people? With people? And outside of people?

I might want them to love me but then why doesn’t it help more when they do? I want to know how important love is. I want to not worry about how temporary it is. To not always be weighing the scales between me and them, effort and disclosure and time and vulnerability and growth and thought and gifts and embarrassment and risks etc. To not be worrying about how I won’t be worth it to them anymore or they won’t be worth it for me anymore if I don’t do something. For it to both be sustainable and for me to let it be sustainable. For it to be enough on its own without interference or my analyzing. To not worry about what I’m saying or doing or offering or assuming. To just trust and not be let down. To not put so much pressure into one or two people. I want to just watch them exist and thrive apart from myself and happy, and also to have them be mine consistently and reliably and lovingly. To both know I can’t hurt them and know they’re still mine even if I do. It’s… controlling. Maybe that’s why I act this way. If I’m helpful and empathetic, I can’t hurt be hurting them right? But they still feel indebted to me for that so they can’t leave.

How much of this are people aware of? How much of it can people just interact with me and just be like “yeah she’s just desperate for reality”? How much do they have no fucking clue about? How do they KNOW? That’s something I’ve never understood. How people can just know what’s better for people or what’s reality. I don’t know. I really really don’t know. I’m just trying not to let it fall apart.

It’s shattered pottery, still in its shape, but only so long as I hold up all the pieces.

I don’t know anyone’s fundamentals. Don’t know their “drive” or “patterns”. Just temperament and thoughts, which are pretty remarkably unrelated.

I can’t tell you the answer anymore. I used to be that far ahead. I used to be the only one in the group who understood what you were saying.

But people got less trusting, more sure of a version of reality and less able to explain the nature of that reality.

They’re getting better, K. They’re healing. They’ve figured out what you did and are getting better.

I want to be happy about it.

But they don’t need me anymore.

And I don’t know how to be in a relationship where I’m not helping.

The line between what I do being help and empathy, and what I do being guess and assume is getting more fuzzy. So behavior has had to change.

I don’t know if I’m good at this anymore. If it was ever really a skill to begin with, or just a strategy that no longer works.

I have my own version of wisdom sure. My own “knowledge” about how people work and about how the invisibilia within people works. But so does everyone else. Everyone has their own opinions on how these things work. I’m very probably no more “right” than anyone else.

And I mean, that belief itself is part of it. Maybe you think you ARE more right than other people. I can’t tell you you’re wrong because I genuinely know no better.

It’s an area where universal agreement doesn’t exist. We think differently. That’s that.

I don’t believe in “obvious”. I think the word has too much assumption. As if there’s a logic of thought that every “competent” person has between one point and another. Blue can be Red. It’s just inaccurate.

But that’s just what I think. What right do I have to believe anything? When there’s always going to be exceptions to every rule. Mistakes that I never would have considered that are obvious to someone else.

Why can’t I just take myself out of the equation entirely? Refuse to commit when it comes with so much limitation, assumption, and misunderstanding?

And there we are. I don’t want to exist.

It’s not suicide so much as lack of having personhood to begin with.

I want to just be in the audience. Never on stage. Just observe and accept another reality.

That’s really what it is.

Not empathy. Not wisdom.

Just an exchange for reality.

I’m not real. Which comes with emptiness, right? Like, if you’re just a shell, there’s nothing to do on the inside. It’s boring and lonely and… just nothing.

So if all I have to do is 90% of the relationship’s work and you give me your reality, sounds like a good deal to me.

My life isn’t really a thing anyway, so why not use this vessel to bring you McDonalds at three AM? When what I get in exchange is two hours looking up at the stars and getting to hear what love is to you?

I crave it. I crave collecting reality and it sustains me. But not enough, never enough.

And here’s where it all breaks right? Where no matter what, I do not have enough reach to hold this pottery together. I’m two hours away at school and you won’t be able to relate the reality by the time I get there. I didn’t seem empty enough for you to think your reality would fit. I didn’t say the right things or made an assumption or stayed quiet when an invisible door was closing. McDonalds is closing.

I’m also real. That’s also a problem.

I can feel the range of people who will talk to me narrowing as I talk more. Can feel the ambiguity and malleable clay that was my shell stiffening into something more difficult to assume. You can’t nudge my shoulder and say “obvious right?” because now you know I don’t believe in obvious. I’m no longer whatever you think you need, I’m what I think you need. Or at least that’s how it started.

Now it’s just a mess of me and my thoughts and my feelings and my values. Actions, words, beliefs… clashing in a way that is definitively human.

Have I fucked it all up? Is this progress? Why can I understand other realities so much better than my own? Why the fuck do I have to even think about my own?

HOW the fuck do I?

Everyone else seemed to think of and value themselves so naturally. Like their reality had to matter. What day of school did I miss where they taught us that? And why wasn’t it a whole class?

Maybe because it doesn’t make sense. I don’t have a framework for this because it defies framework. It’s a mess of yarn that I will never untangle because that is it’s point. To be too complicated to comprehend.

I don’t know what to do with it. How to get it to do what I want. How to conceptualize it enough to function. How to stop hurting it and myself.

There’s a reality to this.

That this whole big thing isn’t really what my life has been.

I am not really a ball of yarn inside a not-as-maleable-as-it-once-was shell that is trying to hold broken ceramic together.

I’m really a cis white girl in Colorado, raised by fantastic parents with two loving siblings and pets and enough money and enough friends and enough opportunities.

I’m not broken. Never even had a broken bone.

See, I don’t get that.

I’m fine.

So why am I so very far from satisfied?

#mine #thoughts #martyr complex #existential #tangles #i don't know if I learned anything from this #but hey #insert silver lining here #i'm actually not anxious today so that's nice #this is genuinely just thoughts this time #no crying was involved in the production of this whateveritis

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perfectirishgifts · 4 years ago

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How Buy Good. Feel Good. Is Making It Easy To Send Ethical And Sustainable Christmas Gifts

New Post has been published on https://perfectirishgifts.com/how-buy-good-feel-good-is-making-it-easy-to-send-ethical-and-sustainable-christmas-gifts/

How Buy Good. Feel Good. Is Making It Easy To Send Ethical And Sustainable Christmas Gifts

Amazonite Bracelet by Daria Day

Buy Good. Feel Good is a supercool marketplace as a one-stop-shop for conscious consumers looking to shop ethical and sustainable products and a platform that enables people to give purpose to every purchase they make.

I caught up with founder Rafik Riad to find out more about some of his favorite brands for the holiday gifting season.

Afdhel Aziz: Hi Rafik, welcome! Please tell us a little about Buy Good. Feel Good. and how the online marketplace came about?

Rafik Riad: We like to think of our Buy Good. Feel Good. marketplace as a one-stop-shop for conscious consumers looking to shop ethical and sustainable products and a platform that enables people to give purpose to every purchase they make.

We only got into the online realm this year. 2020 has certainly been the year of embracing change for us as we had to cancel 3 expos planned both in Toronto and LA. We originally started in 2014 with a physical marketplace in Toronto and slowly started expanding to the US. But when COVID hit, we had to pivot, which is how we became an online marketplace. Our mission remains the same though, we support social enterprises that are putting people and planet first by offering customers alternatives that really make a difference. No matter what you’re on the hunt for, when you shop Buy Good. Feel Good., you help drive the world of e-commerce to a more positive place by supporting brands that push for sustainability and social justice.

Rafik Riad, Founder of Buy Good. Feel Good.

Aziz: Let’s talk about some of your favorite brands and products on the site, starting with gifts for kids?

Riad: That’s a tough one! It is really hard to pick when our roster of vendors is so impressive.

But with everyone staying home for the holidays I’m loving the Boredom Relief Kit from Buena Onda. It’s the perfect way to bring endless games to your home for the whole family, and you’ll feel good about supporting a brand that sustainably employs Mayan artisans in the villages surrounding Lake Atitlán, Guatemala, who handcraft their colourful creations.

The Nurturing Love Blanket from Thread Talk is another one. This soft snuggly organic cotton blanket sized just right for all the love bugs in your life is lovely and 10% of the proceeds goes to help victims of domestic violence across the US.

For something fun, guilt-free, and creative to do with your toddler, the Indigo Dye Kit from The Good Tee, complete with a toddler t-shirt, is definitely a winner. It’s a great introduction for young kids into the beauty of creating color from nature. The Good Tee is a positive example of responsibly made apparel that is fully traceable from farm to warehouse in order to minimize their footprint and measure their environmental impact.

Indigo Dye Kit from The Good Tee, complete with a toddler t-shirt

Aziz: How about gifts for women, what are you loving right now?

Riad: For gifts for women we have so many options to choose from. One of my personal favorites as a gift is the Cactus Necklace available in gold and silver from Kind Karma Company. The cactus symbolizes persistence and resilience because these beautiful plants live in the harshest conditions and are still able to thrive just like the at-risk and homeless youth in Toronto that handcraft the fine jewelry for this social impact brand.

For a gift that helps block out stress in these unprecedented times, the Amazonite Bracelet by Daria Day features hand-cut, smooth Amazonite gemstones (known to soothe energy levels) that are highlighted by a silver patterned separator bead. The bracelet has a quiet sophistication to it and I love the fact that the brand’s mission is to provide artisans at the foothills of K2 Mountain in North Pakistan with a sustainable livelihood while bringing to the market traceable, unique jewelry.

If you’re looking for a real treat for the women in your life, I suggest you check out the Mirabal Handmade Leather Tote by Brave Soles. This gorgeous classic bag is in a distinct class of its own. Brave Soles products are handmade in Dominican Republic using upcycled tire soles with partner local artisans and suppliers using small scale production and local employment.

Cactus Necklace available in gold and silver from Kind Karma Company

Aziz: And for men, who are the brands and products on your radar?

Riad: This one’s a little easier for me because I have a couple of the products in my cart right now!

The Havana Leather Boot by Adelante Shoe Co. is the ultimate staple of ruggedness and class. Expertly made by skilled Guatemalan craftsmen, the boot is designed with the highest quality full-grain leather – and I’m a big fan of their made-to-order model that delivers you a personalized pair of shoes that helps support their craftsmen and their families with access to education, food, and proper means of transportation.

I also can’t wait to get my hands on the Vegan Dopp Kit by Deux Mains. This beautifully handcrafted dopp kit is made using upcycled leather and inner tire tubes in a one of a kind, Port-Au-Prince factory that is completely solar-powered. Deux Mains do a great job of combining artisanal techniques with industrial production to offer eco-friendly, fashion-forward handbags and accessories, made ethically in Haiti.

With the cold weather setting in, the Helyat Handwoven Shawl by Dandarah will become a classic staple to any look. Handwoven by artisans in the Egyptian rural village of Nagada, I feel an affinity with this brand as I am originally from Egypt and I am happy to give Dandarah a platform to support economically and socially marginalized artisans in Egypt, mostly women and minorities, to improve their economic and social conditions.

Havana Leather Boot by Adelante Shoe Co.

Aziz: And finally, how about home and lifestyle?

Riad: With the holidays coming up I am really looking forward to a lot of sleep! And Takasa’s Warm Luxurious Organic Cotton Bed Sheet Set will be the cherry on top. Finished in warm and luxurious sateen, this fair trade and organic cotton set is ethically made in India, from farm to finished product, and is manufactured using environmentally safe methods and is free from harmful chemicals.

I recently bought a new place, and I’m eyeing these Mini Ceramic Vessels from Women of the Cloud Forest to add a little color and flavour to our living space. These decorative vessels are handcrafted in a family workshop in San Juan de Oriente, Nicaragua, and the intricate geometric designs are etched by hand using a sharpened bicycle spoke. I’m also really impressed with the brand for offering no-interest micro-loans and direct grants for workshop capacity building, in addition to providing fair pricing for their artisan partners through cost analysis sessions.

The Essential Oils Starter Kit by Savhera, makes for an amazing gift that encourages wellness. This kit is the perfect introduction to the world of organic essential oils, each with their unique qualities, and Savhera’s USDA certified organic essential oils are the gateway to living-wage and professional employment for sex trafficking survivors from Delhi, India.

I’ll be adding some cheer to the holiday dinner table with the Celebration Runner & Placemat Set from Mayamam Weavers. I’m loving the vibrant colors of this handwoven, 100% cotton set. Mayamam Weavers are inspired by the rich colors and patterns of traditional weaving techniques of Mayan culture and all their products are made by weavers and seamstresses in the western highlands of Guatemala.

Takasa’s Warm Luxurious Organic Cotton Bed Sheet Set

From CMO Network in Perfectirishgifts

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shuuenka-writes · 8 years ago

Text

Between the Lines [10.]

Okita Souji x Reader

Summary: Living in Kyoto these times got really interesting, right? Even for you, the bakery shop owner. It’s not like you could ever be bored having the Shinsengumi Captain around.

pervious: [8.] [9.] [masterlist]

It was a morning after annual festival in Kyoto. You walked along the stalls with a small smile on your face. You worked at the Shimazu’s restaurant for a full month now. The family didn’t ask you questions about your past and you were thankful for that. Though you were sure they labeled you as a tomboy and a rebel. You could live with that, though. You haven’t told them yet that you wanted to somehow start running a business on your own. But you didn’t have right to do so as a woman. Then they would see you as some kind of deviant for sure.

“You seek for attention, don’t you?” you turned around to the source of the voice.

“Excuse me?” you twitched. The green eyes held amusement. You huffed. “Okita-san. Again. Why would I?”

He shrugged and sent you nasty smirk. You heard a horse’s neigh and turned to the source of the sound.

“Yes, I am sure I haven’t seen that girl!” the shopkeeper was nearly shouting at two men. They glared at him and tugged on horse rains. They looked like they were travelling from afar. Cold sweat run down your spine. One of them turned around so you could see his face. You recognized him as one of your father’s henchmen. They were here for you.

You turned around and collided with Okita. He blinked at your fearful expression. You grabbed his hand and pulled him after you.

“I need to get out of here,” you said in nervous whisper.

“Wait, what?” you didn’t wait for his reply as you squeezed through the crowd to the nearest alley. You accidentally pushed some ceramics from the stall. The owner yelled and started to make a scene. This time it was Okita, who took the initiative and jerked your arm. You looked behind you, only to see two henchmen walking in to your direction. You two ran into one of the alleys with two man on your tail.

“You two, stop!” one of them shouted. Okita headed further of the main road and into a labyrinth of streets. You were surprised to see the dead end.

“Oops,” Okita said not even slightly apologetic. "We're lost."

“I thought you knew where we were going!”

“What? I’m not from Kyoto,” he replied and turned to face your foes. They arrived soon enough.

Recognition lit their tired from travel faces. You tried to make yourself smaller than you were, but to no avail.

“_____-hime, we’ve got orders from your father, to take you home,” one of them addressed you. Okita looked at you suspiciously. “Or to kill you for disobedience .

“Never,” you said. You tried to look calm and collected. “I’m not coming back!”

“So be it,” the henchmen drew his sword. The other did the same.

“Move out of the way, boy,” he said. Okita grinned and unsheathed his katana.

“No way~,” he replied and blocked the attack. Within a matter of seconds henchmen were down on the ground. They groaned clutching their injuries. Okita stood before them with a bored look. “That’s it? But I think I can’t let you go.”

He glanced at you. Breaking from the shock you gulped. You weren’t sure what to do. You didn’t want to cause deaths, your stomach already made a flip at that thought. It wasn’t like you’ve never seen dead body. But to cause somebody’s death was whole different matter. Then again, they would come back to your father and tell him where you were.

When you were thinking one of them stood up and once again tried to attack Okita. He was quickly defeated and squirmed in pool of his own blood. You saw his last breath. The same fate met the second henchmen.

The smell of blood reached your nostrils and you had to force yourself to not vomit. You stood paralyzed and didn’t hear Okita’s voice. Finally he shook you and led you out of the alley. You tugged along not sure where you were going. You stopped in another empty alley as he faced you.

“What was it all about?” Okita said in displeased voice. “So in the end you are some bratty princess who run away from home?” you looked into his eyes, and amusement you saw earlier vanished. His words angered you. But it seemed he would not stop now. “What, did poetry got boring so you decided to look how peasants live?”

He sneered at you. You clenched your fists. He was opening his mouth to say more.

“Or maybe silks were too much to bear?”

“I will not be a cattle!” you raged. “You do not know how it is! You are a man after all!”

“So what? You’re really some bratty-“

“In my father’s eyes I’m just a cow, decked to be sold,” you interrupted. “Smile, bow, make a tea. Smile, bow, bring him food. Smile, bow, giggle at your future husbands unfunny jokes.”

You started to rant. Okita kept silent. In your whole life there hasn’t been a single person who would hear you out. You didn’t know why, but you poured your whole hear out.

“In the end of the day you’re just a cow to be sold, and your own father is the seller. Why? Just because you are not a boy! Because your mother was from low class and couldn’t give long awaited male heir. You are made to be praised, yet all you see is hate. Maids, servants, henchmen, samurais. They all put on a smile, but you could feel their hateful, yet lustful gazes.”

You clenched your fists harder. Nails dug into your hands. You couldn’t bear his gaze.

“You think I have everything served on a golden plate. But in reality that gold is just a paint covering dirty, rotting wood. And then you learn how to be a lady. How to smile, how to be polite. How to be perfect slave for your future husband....," you paused." Perhaps I’m my mother’s daughter, I refuse to be a slave and I want follow her advice.”

“What was her advice?” he asked.

“To live a life worth living, live a life to its fullest, so in the end I won’t regret it. She told me that on her deathbed six years ago,” you smiled bitterly. “And for me life worth living is not the one of the cattle. So I ran away. Away from my father, from hateful court. And all I want to do now is to live.”

For a while none of you made any sound.

“No all what glitters is gold,” Okita hummed. You looked at him. He still pondered at your words. You didn’t expect him to understand your feelings. You snorted at yourself mentally. Of course, you came out as some bratty princess. You didn’t notice him passing you by. “Are you coming? Or I guess you like empty alleys that much.”

“Huh?” you blinked. He just glanced back at you and repeated his question. “Y-yeah.”

You walked alongside with him in silence. It was rather awkard walk. You decided to ask him about the earlier fight.

“You defeated those two in a matter of seconds,” you started. “Yet you had hard time with that man almost month ago, how come?”

He sent you nasty grin that made you squirm.

“I just wanted to see what will he do to you. He kept glancing at you. I thought it’ll be interesting.”

“Whaa-!? So it’s your fault he took me as a hostage! He could’ve killed me!” you twitched. He shrugged with a laugh. “You’re unbelievable!”

“And you’re crazy,” he concluded. “Did you really believe that I would be defeated? I’m a sword master.”

“Impossible. You can’t be much older than me,” you sent him skeptical look.

“Pfft. Kondou-san taught me at his dojo. I almost mastered all techniques at Tennen Rishin-ryu school.”

“Yeah, sure,” you rolled your eyes. “Who’s Kondou-san?”

“The person I owe everything. I raise my sword in his name,” he smiled. For the first time you saw him smiling genuinely. You had to admit, this smile was far much better than his usual smiles. “He took me in, when my sister left me.”

“He must be very kind person then,” you said and smiled at him.

“He is!”

You walked in content silence back to the main road. You felt as if some weight was lifted from your shoulders. Somebody finally listened to you. You couldn’t tell your secret to Shimazu family, no matter how welcoming they were. you were sure they would send you back home. You were surprised that Okita didn’t make any nasty or rude remarks about your story. He seemed to just that kind of person. But you learned something today. You, who always were misjudged and thrived for understanding, made the same mistake. You thought of Okita as of mean, presumably heartless person, when in fact he turned to be a person you could pour your heart out. It seemed that you and him were judgmental type of people, but perhaps both of you made an effort to understand.

“Hey,” he said when you were on the main road again. “I’m leaving for Edo tomorrow.”

“Oh, I see,” you said, little disappointed.

“Don’t get in trouble too much!” he grinned. You blushed and hid behind kimono sleeve.

“Go away already!”

***

From that event passed three years. You finally had a bakery on your own, though it was more of an sweet shop, as Kimiko liked to point out. Sure, it was unusual for a woman to run a business but with help of Shimazu family you were able to pull it off. After a long persuading, head of the family agreed to establish the business under his name. You were overjoyed.

“Hello?” you were at the back of the shop when you heard male voice.

“Coming!” you called dusting off your hands. With a polite smile you moved out of curtains. You blinked seeing familiar green eyes. You tried to recall the name. It finally clicked.“Okita-san?”

“Ho~ it’s gonna be interesting,” he grinned at you.

“I don’t like your smile…”

You woke up with a pain in your left hand. You recalled your dream. Indeed, it was quite eventful. It was already seven years. And a four of having Okita as your customer.

You opened your eyes to the unfamiliar ceiling when somebody came to the room.

“Oh, you woke up,” you heard a muffled voice. It was Chizuru. “How are you feeling?”

“Confused?” you offered. She laughed a little and sat beside your futon. She helped you to the sitting position. She said that you were sleeping for a day and now you were in her room. You nodded at her explanation. She gave you some medicine.You looked at your hand. It was tightly bandaged but you could move your fingers a little. Though it was quite painful.

You wondered what happened to Okita. He took the Water of life from Kaoru after all, though the details were still fuzzy. Wave of guilt shook your body. Kaoru was here for you, because of his fantasy that you two were meant together. He was such a sweet boy years ago. You didn’t have any friends around your age back then. He was obviously younger than you, but he became brother you’ve never had. You knew he admired you and it felt nice back then.

But now you learned that you were betrayed b him three times. One, when he deceived you with that outfit. Second when he killed your best friend, Kimiko. And third, most painful one, that he pretended to be your friend. And in addition he made Okita drink the Water of life.

“Ah, I see you’re awake,” you heard another voice before you could ask. You blinked. Kondou stood at the doors smiling slightly. You nodded slowly. Great, you thought. It wasn’t like you weren’t happy to meet him again, but that meant now he knew you weren’t a boy. “May I come in?”

“Y-yes, please...”

“Once again, I’m Kondou Isami, the commander of the Shinsengumi,” he bowed to you.

You went all red. It was so embarrassing that he now knew all about your lies and yet was so nice.

“I’m ________ _____, “ you sat on your knees and bowed deeply. You ignored pain and a headache. “I apologize for disturbance, trespassing and deceiving everybody. I didn’t want to cause anyone problems.”

You wanted to add ‘please don’t kill me’ at the end but decided against it. It was already bad.

“I can’t say it’s acceptable,” he spoke when you sat up. “but what’s done it’s done. As for now only Souji, Chizuru and me know about you here.”

“And Wakahisa-san,” you added. You looked away when you recalled the whole ordeal with him.

“Uhm, yes,” Kondou nodded. “How are you feeling?”

“I’m alright, all thanks to you,” you said. You didn’t want to worry them. You decided to ask about something that bugged you since you woke up. You took deep breath. “Uhm… How’s Souji-san?”

For a moment nobody said anything. You felt tension in the room. You looked Kondou in the eyes. You pleaded him silently.

“I’m fine, stop worrying,” you turned to the doors. Okita stood there with his lazy grin. Wave of relief flooded your body. He stood there, safe and sound. His smile shrunk as he shut the doors. “Now I think it’s time for you to go.”

He looked at you with serious gaze. You blinked.

“Huh?”

“You’ve caused enough problems and if you’re good then go.”

“W-wait, Souji-“ Kondou began.

You stared at Okita. Something in his eyes made you uncomfortable.

“Why-?”

“Do you think the headquarters is your playground?“ he asked you. You felt cold emmiting from him. His words hurt.

“You don’t have to be so rude about it,” you stood up meeting his gaze. You winced when you felt sharp pain in your hand. But, honestly, you had enough of it.

“You always meddle in other people’s business-“

“If I hadn’t meddle, you’d be dead for years by now!” you shouted. You couldn't belive you were so brave to actually shout at him.

“I’m pretty good at surviving if you haven’t noticed yet. And don’t pull that old case now.”

“Are you joking? What was it yesterday?” you asked. His venomous tone made you even more angry. Now you remembered everything that happened when Kaoru came.

“I see you’re in your delusions again,_____, “ he sneered at you. “If you think I took the Water for you, then you are wrong.”

You felt as if you were stabbed. You bit your lip.

“I took it for myself and myself only,” he continued when you didn’t answer. “So better give up on you fantasies.”

It was the last straw. You slapped him across the face. You didn’t notice shocked faces of Kondou and Chizuru who were listening to your clash in silence.

“Shut up!” you met his eyes. Your own burned with a passion. “I don’t want to hear anything from you! Leave me alone! If you ever decide to stop being an asshole, then-!”

You stopped. Then what? Come and talk to you? You turned on your feet and grabbed your belongings. You fastened two swords on your hips and moved to the doors.

“Thank you for the hospitality, Kondou-san, Chizuru-chan,” you made quick bow, not looking at Okita. You walked out of the room and shut the doors with loud slam. You almost ran through the corridor till you were outside. You knew that Chizuru went after you, but with last thanks, you dismissed her. With tears on your face you made your way to your home.

***

Back in the room two males were frozen in place. Kondou took a deep breath. He didn't have anything to say.

“Slapped twice in one day, huh…?” Okita said quietly. Kondou looked at him as he messaged his cheek.

“Was that necessarily?” Kondo asked warily. Expression of pain crossed Okita’s face.

“It’s better,” he replied. He moved to the doors. “It’s better if she doesn’t know what I’ve became. She would blame herself to no end.”

“Why did you take the Water of life?” Kondou asked. There was something else, hidden under the facade.

“I wonder…,” he said and walked out of the room.

#Okita Souji #okita imagines #hakuoki imagine #hakuoki scenario #hakuouki imagine #okita x reader #BTL

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conversationswithhank · 8 years ago

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Hank: (deep discontented sigh)

Me: (having just been hosted for a coffee by our neighborhood friendly auto-parts store owner) Two cakes in one day! Lord, you’re a loved and lucky boy! Sr. Pereira is so kind.

Hank: He is and I like him, but… (sigh)

Me: But what?

Hank: Why are adults always asking me what I want to be when I grow up? Or that when they were my age they were done with school and working? It’s like every time I want to yell, “I’m a kid! I don’t know what I want to do for a job! And I know… I know you were working when you were my age. I know already!”

Me: Wow. Okay. These are two separate and very important things, so lets break it down so that you can be more empathetic when someone tells you their story of leaving school after 4th grade.

Hank: That is how it was back then.

Me: For some.

Hank: What?

Me: Era uma vez (once upon a time) before the revolution (April 25, 1974) your education ended at the end of 4th grade unless your family could afford to educate you further. Think about that. It didn’t matter if you were smart, it didn’t matter if you loved learning with your whole heart, if you were poor you went to work and if you were wealthy you continued on. Can you imagine leaving school in a month and never going back?

Hank: (pause) No.

Me: Your Avó Dalia (grandmother) was devastated to leave school. Your Avô Alfredo (grandfather) went to apprentice to be a carpenter and Dalia worked in the fields, helped take care of your tias and tios (aunts and uncles), then she went and worked in factories. After the revolution one of the important policies that everyone fought for was education for all. The key word in that sentence is fought. It was so important to the people of Portugal to end the stunting of education that they fought for all children to be able to stay in school, for you to be able to stay in school! That is why neighbors, family, strangers when they hear how old you are they tell you the story of how they hadto leave school, because they are so proud and grateful that you don’t have to. You are truly privileged, Hank.

Hank: If the revolution didn’t happen that means my papa would also have finished school when he was nine years old, too?

Me: Yes. Our family is a proud, funny, loud, charming, working class, amazing group of loving people, but your papa would have never become a doctor (Phd) without the revolution or the money to keep him in school.

Hank: And papa would have never gone to study in America and you would never have met and I wouldn’t have you and papa as my parents and Molly as my sister.

Me: (nodding) When someone confesses that they left school at your age your answer should never be (annoyed), “I know, I know, jeesh.” You should listen to what they’re saying with an open heart and say, “I am so lucky. I love school.”

Hank: I never thought of it that way.

Me: Another reason you are privileged. You never had to. And now on to the second part of your query: Yes, for the rest of your life from this day forward someone will ask about your future plans: job, wife or no wife, kids or no kids, house, car, the whole enchilada.

Hank: What’s an enchilada?

Me: (shaking my head) You’re so European. An enchilada… never mind it means everything. (starting over) Hence forth for the rest of your life until you’ve become stable and established people will pepper you with question as to your intentions.

Hank: Why? That is so frustrating. I don’t know! How am I supposed to know?

Me: Some people do. My childhood friend Lisa wanted to become a chemical engineer when she was your age and guess what?

Hank: What.

Me: She is a chemical engineer.

Hank: How did she know that way back then?

Me: She just did. Now, I have a bit of a trick that worked well for me when I didn’t know what I wanted to do in life so the next time someone asks you what you want to be when you grow up you can say, “I don’t know what I want to do yet but I plan on being very happy.”

Hank: That’s good. I like that. That is what I will say.

Me: It works well and changes the subject away from the epic life quandary and on to the satisfying notion to live a happy, lovely life.

Hank: That’s perfect because I don’t know about the future. I might have a job that pays my bills and then my happiness comes from my life and my friends and my family.

Me: Truth! That’s what I did until I moved to Portugal. I had a string of jobs that paid the bills and then focused on my passions after work. A smart, thoughtful answer will get you far. You don’t have to let other people pressure you. Never take other people personally! You do you and grow and learn and your future will unfold as it should. I can’t imagine what your future will look like. The world is changing so fast, far too fast for you at nine or I at 37 to be able to answer the question of what you will be when you grow up, but you will work hard to be happy. That we know for certain.

Hank: People ask you what I want to be?

Me: All the flippin’ time! It’s madness. It’s far too rushed.

Hank: Wow.

Me: But it was the same when I was young, but unlike you I always had an answer until I was about 19 and then I had no clue. When I was your age I wanted to be a flower arranger.

Hank: What’s that?

Me: The person who makes bouquets at the flower shop.

Hank: Oh, so you wanted to own a flower shop?

Me: No, I just wanted to be the arranger. Then I wanted to be a writer.

Hank: You are a writer.

Me: But then I forgot I wanted to be a writer when I fell behind in school and started struggling with reading and writing. I thought writers must be smart and I knew I was stupid

Hank: You’re not stupid.

Me: Well, I know that now, but I was convinced then that I was stupid because I didn’t know I wasdyslexic SO because I could barely read or write I decided I would be an actress.

Hank: You did?

Me: Oh yes. This was my longest phase. I never got one lead roll and was a constant chorus girl but I was determined and auditioned for everything. Then I decided I wanted to be an anthropologist.

Hank: A what?

Me: A doctor who studies people and cultures. It was the only “real job” I could find that felt utterly romantic and adventurous. I wanted to travel the world and immerse myself in cultures and then observe how those cultures grew and thrived, but all the while I was making art and taking art classes and throwing pottery and was always in the art building and covered in mud or in museums sitting quietly in front of art to sooth my weary soul.

Hank: But you’re not an anthropologist.

Me: No, I dropped out of school. I couldn’t keep up with the reading and the work. I didn’t want to get a Phd and my grades were average at best and school was expensive and so I got a job and just worked but I spent my vacations making fruit trays and doing kitchen prep in the kitchens of these fancy craft schools in North Carolina and Tennessee so that I could take more pottery classes and learn from working potters. I worked all year to be an artist for a few weeks and then I got a second job managing a ceramics and photography studio. I taught classes and I met your papa and I realized that I was an artist, there was no helping it, so I went back to school and then I got pregnant and then I moved to Europe and then I learned Portuguese and I remembered I had always wanted to be a writer so I started doing that and then I had your sister and then I got sick, but I kept writing, and now I am making working with clay again and teaching workshops and my RA/AS is more manageable and through it all I have always, always, always promised myself I would be happy. And I have been. I am happy every single day and I am loved and I consider that to be the success of my life.

Hank: Wow. You have done so much.

Me: Life is not a strait line, Hank. It is a winding road. It is an adventure.

Hank: I don’t know what I want to do yet, but I have decided to be very happy.

Me: No one ever called you dumb.

Hank: Not one day.

#parenting #mumblr #what do you want to be when you grow up #clever answer #happy #honest parenting #bilingual #two culture family #Portugal #Portuguese #25 de abril #life is not a strait line #spoonie #chronicallyawesome #conversations with hank

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filosofablogger · 7 years ago

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Good morning and Happy Weekend! Today I considered writing a piece on St. Patrick’s Day, but somehow I just couldn’t get into it. And, because of the religious connections, I thought perhaps it was best I leave it alone. I will, however, end with a few funny St. Patrick’s cartoons. And anyway, given that I am getting a bit fed up with my own nation of residence this week, I thought it would be fun to do some traveling, and thus I went in search of new and interesting places. Sit back and take a few minutes, if you will, to travel with me before starting your weekend activities.

Today let us begin our journey in Villa De Leyva, Colombia, where I have found the most unique house to show you! Remember when you were a kid and on a snowy or rainy day, stuck indoors you played with such things as Matchbox cars, plastic horses, and that all-time favourite, modelling clay? Remember how you used to build little clay houses … what? You didn’t? Seriously? Well, anyway, some of us did that. Here in Villa De Leyva, there is a real, life-size clay house! Atlas Obscura says …

“Casa Terracota is a fully habitable two-story cottage made entirely from clay. It’s a blend of both architecture and art; a gorgeous creation that lets visitors imagine what it would be like to live inside a giant piece of artisanal pottery—though this house goes far beyond what anyone could ever dream of making in a typical high school art class.”

The architect, Octavio Mendosa, has called the house the “world’s largest piece of pottery”. Mendoza sculpted the entire abode from clay, using no other materials to support the two-story structure. He then let it bake and harden in the sun, which transformed the pliable clay into solid, sturdy ceramic.

Its walls slope and curve, much like the way the surrounding hills roll toward the horizon. The inside is airy and welcoming, with functioning bedrooms, sitting areas, and even bathrooms all made from clay. The furniture, too, was born from soil and water. Colorful tile mosaics add vibrant pops of color to the baked, earthy inside.

I would absolutely adore living in this little house … well, not so little, really, at 5,400 square feet … about 4 times bigger than what I have now!

I landed … phlumph … in Texas, hot on the trail of a different story, but then I happened upon this and I liked it better. You’ve all heard about the ‘killer bees’, right?

In the 1950s, South American scientists were attempting to cross European honey bees with African stock to bolster local honey production and engineer a bee subspecies that would thrive in the subtropical climate. Problems arose when a few African queen bees escaped from the Brazilian apiary and began mating with the locals, resulting in a volatile hybrid subspecies.

The individual bees themselves aren’t deadly—the venom in their sting is actually slightly less powerful than that of a European honey bee. However, they’re far more aggressive when provoked. When the Africanized bees sense a disturbance to their hive, they swarm and sting in droves. Even the noise from a passing vehicle or the rumble of a lawnmower can trigger a defensive attack that can be fatal.

The escaped bees and their progeny spread northward throughout the Americas, killing hundreds of people and animals along the way. When a swarm of about 3,000 of the “killer bees” was found in a monitoring trap on the outskirts of Hidalgo, Texas, it proved the unwelcome immigrants had finally crossed the Mexican border. (Should have been a wall to keep them out, yes?)

While most places greeted this news with angst, Hidalgo’s mayor decided to erect a monument, and the city became known as the “killer bee capital of the world”!

And while we’re here in Texas … y’know how they always say “everything is BIG in Texas”? Well, the bee was certainly big, but here’s another … a {meep meep} roadrunner named Paisano Pete!

In 1980, Fort Stockton mayor, Gene Cummings, purchased this fiberglass roadrunner to be the town’s mascot, and had it placed in the center of town at the corner of Main Street and Dickinson Boulevard. The city then held a “Name the Roadrunner” contest offering $50 to the best suggestion, and after fielding a number of suggestions, Paisano Pete was the winner.

For 13 years, Pete was the world’s largest roadrunner, at 11 feet tall and 22 feet long. But then he lost his title to a larger statue in Las Cruces, New Mexico.

I must admit that I chose this one for its virtually unpronounceable name: Fjaðrárgljúfur. However, even beyond the name, the scenery is unique and worthy of a look.

Fjaðrárgljúfur is a canyon a bit off the path off Iceland’s famous Ring Road. At just over a mile long, it certainly doesn’t boast the enormous expanses of the world’s other mighty canyons. But what it may lack in size, it absolutely makes up for in beauty.

The river was formed from melting glaciers some two million years ago (now just how do they know that???) and it whittled out strange geologic patterns. The walls jut in and out, swerving back and forth so the water takes the shape of a blue snake slithering across the terrain. There is a walking trail across the tops of the crags, where it is said one feels as if he is standing atop a kingdom.

I hope you’ve enjoyed our brief tour of some places we don’t get to see every day. And now, as promised, a few St. Paddy ‘toons to start your weekend with a smile! Have a terrific weekend, my friends!

Saturday Surprise — Let’s Travel!~~ Good morning and Happy Weekend! Today I considered writing a piece on St. Patrick’s Day, but somehow I just couldn’t get into it.

#Casa Terracotta #Colombia #Fjaðrárgljúfur #Giant killer bee #Giant roadrunner #Hidalgo Texas #Iceland #Paisano Pete #Villa De Leyva

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quietroots · 8 years ago

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Reflecting

What was the best way you used your time this past year? Hauling rocks and dirt around the yard. The garden was pretty magnificent this year. I put lots of infrastructure in place, raised beds, leaf mulched the pathways, planted some perennials that should fill out nicely. I grew the best green bean teepee, better than I hoped for. I like that it’ll never be a finished project. Always more things to add, and plant, and harvest, and change.

What was your single biggest time waster in your life this past year? I struggled with wasting time in the online realm. So much unthinking consumption, so easy to do. In the summer, on my days away from work, I would sometimes spend hours scrolling through various feeds, rechecking email accounts... In November I let go of my Facebook account, which gave me some respite. Actively trying to use it as a tool for inspiration, and sharing my life, not as something to spend hours refreshing to see if anything new is happening in the constant goal. Sometimes I fall short of that.

What would you try if you knew you could not fail? The idea of having some land, a small flower farm, and maybe a flower of the month club, with a ceramic partnership to make seasonal vases and floral arrangements is so appealing. Last summer I made several small arrangements from backyard flowers and foliage and gifted them to friends, but to do so on a larger scale, or to learn more about flower arranging and ceramic work is daunting. What is a skill you would like to focus on learning? I would love to get to know (and master?) my sewing machine. I have a Singer Curvy, and it is very mechanized. The thread tension has been hit or miss. I would love to be able to make my own dresses and summer pants as it gets warmer this year. There are some excellent looking patterns out there (everything in the 100 Acts of Sewing collection!) that I want to try. What was an unexpected joy this past year? Watching my sister put so much effort into her community garden plot, and seeing it thrive under her care. Best new gardener award goes to Julia, easily! All of the tomatoes (grown from seed!), and radishes and beets for you.

What was an unexpected obstacle? Grieving the unexpected death of my mother, who I wasn’t very close to, and thought there would be time for that to change. This was the first time I've lost someone. Also, learning to unschedule my time, and leave space. Turning down offers to take on more. Our culture puts a high value on staying busy. It’s a tough mentality to let go of, that if you aren’t filling your schedule with classes or volunteer time, or other plans, then you are wasting it. I don’t feel good living that way. What were the best books you read this year? Spirit and Place, by Christopher Day Negotiating with the Dead : A Writer on Writing, by Margaret Atwood A Sense of Place : An Eastern Oregon Anthology, by LEO (Libraries of Eastern Oregon) Fool on the Hill, by Matt Ruff A Tale for the Time-Being, by Ruth Ozeki Any Ursula K. Le Guin books I could get my hands on

Who were your most valuable relationships with? My family! I am greedy for more time spent with my sister, who lives several hours away and has a full life of her own, and my dad, who lives thousands of miles away. Also my boyfriend/roommate/coworker (trifecta!) Brian, who has been a part of my life for a couple years now, and is a neat person to be around. Finally, my circle of coworkers is the most solid I’ve ever had, many of whom I spend time with outside of work, and all of whom I enjoy seeing on a regular basis. What brings you the most joy and how are you going to have more of that? Striking the right balance between time spent at home with my Brians and in my garden, and time spent socializing with folks who I love. Perhaps structuring more time with friends into my life, more weekly coffee dates and craft meet ups. I’m so reluctant to do things away from my home in the evenings, but more time spent reaching out to folks for morning and afternoon hang outs would be excellent. And spending time in my yard, working in the garden, as well as making my space in the loft just how I like it, and cooking meals in the kitchen fills me with joy. What is one change you could make to your lifestyle that would give you more peace? Shifting away from buying cheaply made, inexpensive goods, at great cost to the environment and folks’ lives, and beginning to choose to buy things that support individual makers and artists. Especially food and clothing, but not limited to those categories. Along with this, getting rid of the things I’ve been carrying around for years that I don’t look to anymore. How would you like to positively influence the life of a child this year? Be an excellent role model to Brian’s nieces. Send them letters, ask them questions, support them. Keep in touch.

What’s one thing that you could do to give yourself more peace financially? Be timely with keeping the status of my student loans updated and accurate. Pay them when I can, defer them when I can’t, and be ok with that. Start squirreling more money into my savings and stop spending it so freely on little unnecessary things that add up. Be more aware of my purchasing habits. Do some little jobs on the side and save that money.

What exercise will you like to try this year? Is this the year that I begin regularly stretching? Probably! I can feel my body beginning to take longer to recover after hard physical activity.

What types of food will you like to incorporate more in your diet? More fresh fruit and vegetables! I am a hot foods person. I don’t naturally gravitate towards salads, or cold fermented foods (I’m looking at you, kimchi & sauerkraut). My diet is mostly beans and grains and roasted vegetables. There is definite room for improvement. What body part needs more attention and loving care? My hands. These poor nails are always bitten too short (a nervous habit that I enjoy), I nicked the tip of my thumb with a sharp knife while cutting onions, and the hard skin of a garlic clove stabbed that same thumb where it bends. My feet could use some love as well. What will you be willing to try outside your comfort zone to increase your health? This year is the year that I’ll sit a Vipassana meditation course. What music or art class would you consider taking this year? The Craft Center at the University of Oregon offers beginners ceramics classes, so I signed up for one that runs just over a month. I want to make things for the household, and the garden, and for gifting. How would you like your style to be different this year? Eugene is kind to folks who embrace how they want to look. I want less man-made materials and mass produced clothing. Ideally I would spend more time thrifting natural fiber clothes, and dyeing them, as well as learning to sew my own. Where would you like to go on vacation this year? This March, Brian’s parents are coming out, and we’re all trekking up to Washington to visit the Olympic National Park rainforests. Late June and into July, Brian and I are spending a week or so camping with his family somewhere in the middle of Oregon, near Bend. How would you like to grow emotionally this year? Less bursting into tears (of rage, despair, or embarrassment), more thoughtful, straightforward articulation of how I feel and what I want.

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susantregre · 6 years ago

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What To Do With Older Kids During Holiday Break

What to do with older kids during holiday break? It is a question that many families are asking today…or will be asking in the next few weeks!

Here is some practical advice for what to do with older kids during holiday break from a mom of three older kids who has struggled with the concept of quality time spent with teens!

I am now the mom of 3 teenage boys.

It happened suddenly last week when my youngest turned 13.

This last year, I started working on a project that put into words, steps and systemized some of the things I have learned {the hard way} of being a mom. Watch for that series to get started here on Kids Activities starting January 1…

And one of the things that kept coming up was quality time with teens.

In fact, one of the moms that went through the program actually wrote me and said, “I just don’t know WHAT to do with them!”

Hey, I get it. In fact, I get it more than you can imagine! I have spent the last decade devoted to kids activities and crafts…the type of thing you see here on the site.

Give me a 2 year old and I have 100s of ideas of ways to play!

Need ideas to keep that science-loving 5 year old busy for a few hours?

If you have run out of homemade slime recipes...I literally wrote a book for you (affiliate).

But…when it comes to a 13 y/o that rolls his eyes when a craft is suggested or a 17 y/o who seems too busy to spend time with the family, things get a little more challenging.

Activities for Older Kids Inspired by Vacationing with Teens

One of my solutions to this challenge of finding quality time activities for older kids is to draw on any experience you might have from the family vacation. I found over the years, that when the family was AWAY from home, together, with bad internet connection, it was easier.

In fact, as my boys got older, traveling got so much easier!

They started wanting to do the things I liked to do.

No more 13 hour Candyland marathons {shoot me now}!

They could participate in things that I loved to do:

rock climbing

skiing

biking

hiking

exploring more than a 100 yard trail

scuba diving

swimming

card games like poker and Rook

board games like Settlers of Catan

trying new food at a restaurant (and behaving during the WHOLE meal)

going to a movie I actually might choose

concerts

plays

escape rooms

painting classes

cooking lessons

kitchen tours or any type of tour

and so many other things that younger kids are just too young for participation…

Have you played tourist with your kids in your own town?

We live in the Dallas-Fort Worth area which has a million things to do with kids and we haven’t taken advantage of it! All the things I have mentioned are things we have done while away. This break, I am challenging myself to find some of those special places to take the teens that we would be delighted to visit if we found them while vacationing elsewhere!

Older Kids Still Yearn to Play

No matter how much eye-rolling and choruses of “oh mom!” I might hear from my teenagers, I try to stay confident that under all that teen angst lies the heart of a child.

Push through the resistance. <–I promise you it will be worth it.

At first, you might need to be a little sneaky. But I truly believe that your child was given to YOU for a reason because if anyone can outsmart him, it is you.

To prove my point, I thought back to the last time one of my boys was laughing out of control. You know the type of laugh that shakes their entire body and is completely uncontrollable. What prompted that laugh? It is usually rooted in simple play. Like when the dog {our dear Panda} was intentionally “stuck” under the bed and playfully attacking anyone trying to rescue her. Or trash-talking after a board game win. Or when a side of the gingerbread house he had constructed just wouldn’t stay and a pile of gingerbread rubble erupted. Or when we got lost on a trailride and ended up going in circles despite my absolute confidence we were going in the right direction. Or when they were trying to explain Fortnite to grandma.

We all need play in our lives.

As kids our world is shaped by play.

As teenagers, play helps make sense of the world and put it in perspective.

As adults, it helps decrease stress and connect us with others.

When you are using the excuse that your teen is too grumpy or disconnected to play, you are depriving them of the very thing that could get them out of their funk.

So it is OK to push a little. Set some expectations. Gently demand some participation.

Ideas for Activities for Teens at Home

Traditional play activities should not be overlooked even though kids are older. There is a sensory experience that happens when you get your hands dirty, jump around or dive into a pool that helps increase endorphins and a sense of well-being.

Think of an older version of any activity that your kid loved when they were younger.

If they loved playing with playdough, then consider suggesting baking bread together or making a batch of sugar cookies that would require rolling out of dough and decorating.

If they loved playing with LEGO bricks, then think of a building/strategy activity like one of the advanced LEGO model sets, putting a puzzle together, or playing a strategy game like Chess. Make a gingerbread house or city!

If they loved going to the park, then find something physical you can do together outside. Biking, hiking, snowman-making, simply taking a walk with the dog, going to the community indoor pool, finding a good trampoline park if you don’t have one in the backyard, or creating a obstacle course inside/outside and timing each other’s journey through it.

If they loved kids crafts, this one is simple. There are so many more options for adult crafts that can work amazingly. Knitting, crocheting, needle-point, wood-working, wreath-making, sewing, create homemade ornaments for your Christmas tree, make gifts to give this season, a trip together to a local craft supply store can open the doors to so many adventures together…

If they loved making art, again, this one is simple. Being an artist is a life-long journey. Experiencing different mediums, trying new techniques and honing skills is something that takes a lifetime to master and there is no reason they shouldn’t keep having that fun as a teen. If they have always loved to draw, but never tried sculpting, that is something that you could try. Or if they love painting, but have never tried it on ceramics, that would be an easy activity that would require very little convincing!

If they love playing video games, then put that affinity for strategy and competition to work at your kitchen table in the form of card and board games. It is the same thing. Don’t be intimidated by the simplicity of the game when the majority of the activity is strategy! There is a reason that poker rooms in Las Vegas are filled with 20-30 year olds who were gamers. They desire community and competition which both video games and card/board games can provide IRL.

How to Get Started Planning Activities for Older Kids

Create a plan of action – get out the calendar and figure out what days are best to do things outside the house and which days are best to stay at home. For us, we are very adverse to crowds! So, finding when less people will be visiting our desired destination would be the first thought.

One thing a day – don’t overwhelm yourself with planning or your teen with forced family time! Start slow. Adding just one thing each day that you will do together is plenty and can make sure they do have the required 13 hours of texting time they need.

Get teens involved in planning – remember when they were little and you gave them directed choices? You know…do you want this apple or this carrot stick? That is the same concept here. You already have an outline of what the next few days will look like and this can help guide things in a direction that they are excited about (OK, tolerant of). Let’s say that Monday you are planning something outside of the house. You could offer three choices: the paining class, the escape room or the science museum trip?

Take them shopping for supplies – I don’t care what age kids are, this is a good strategy. The problem with our adult brains is that we OVER-strategize crafts and art projects with the end result in mind. Kids and teens aren’t like that and we should encourage it. They would do it so differently than we directed if they had the chance. Give them that option. Going to the craft store with an open mind and a suggested project (and budget) with their input will have you bringing home a completely different set of supplies for a completely different project that they are way more excited about.

Share the schedule from day one – don’t spring “forced” family time on them. It will make them feel held hostage and give them a bad case of FOMO with their friends and online activities. Setting start and end times gives them a sense of control over their schedule and is respectful of the fact that they do have things they want to do. If there is a conflict of time, think about being flexible about changing.

Don’t give up after the first day – stick to your plan through the entire holiday. It is ok to make changes, be flexible and adjust expectations! Teens are a lot like two year olds…they really do thrive on schedules and family contact, but they have a really hard time seeing it or expressing it. When you are in a routine that they start to understand, they can relax and begin to adapt to it. If something goes poorly, stopping it short of the expected time and giving a teen a hug and “releasing” them is fine, but start over the next day.

Set realistic expectations – I know you see other family’s post on FB about how they spent the entire day in a beautiful episode of dancing through daisies followed by organic, vegan picnics and dreamcatcher creations. There is no family on earth that actually spent their day in that manner (especially if there is gorgeous photos or videos involved). Behind the camera were tears, a lot of messed up white clothing and 1/2 eaten sprout-infested sandwiches. You know your family. You know your kids. Expect that not everything will go as planned. Embrace that this is more about spending time WITH them and not getting whatever planned activity completed.

Above all, have fun. You need the break too. You need the play. You need the connection with your kids. And that only happens if you aren’t playing drill sergeant, fun police or party hostess. Be a participant in the activity! Laugh alongside your kids. Make mistakes. Make it so it is easy for them to laugh at you.

Having More Fun as a Family

Life gets busy. And if you have involved teens, that means it is a revolving door of sports, enrichment activities and time with friends. A teen’s home base is still HOME. They still get their confidence, resilience and perspective from their family experience.

If that family experience is only filled with coming/going, directions, corrections and schedules, they are going to miss out on gaining the coping skills it really takes to be an adult in the real world.

If that family experience is sprinkled with inside jokes, playful teasing and quality time together, they are going to gain a perspective that allows them not to take things so seriously.

The truth is, this is just something we need to do. It won’t look perfect. It won’t go as planned. But the investment we make into our kids is the most important thing in life right now…and they need to have a little more fun!

What is your favorite thing to do with older kids? Please tell me in the comments!

The post What To Do With Older Kids During Holiday Break appeared first on Kids Activities Blog.

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jodesadonley · 7 years ago

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#WEEK5

[MAKING VISION INTO REALITY]

As always been the case my final work doesn’t turn out the way I expected it to be. My initial idea is not impossible to achieve but it requires extra amount of time and resources so I experimented by building a smaller scale and I am pretty happy with the results. I’ve learnt many things during the making process. From undergoing self-reflection, studying material possibilities, the associations of the form to thinking conceptually and putting the work into context.

This sculpture is called “Hourglass” (2018). It is made of a steel frame, a plastic bowl, 10 kgs. of burnt rice and a metal sheet. This is kind of a sequel to my previous ceramic work - “My mothers milk”(2017). The structures of this sculpture challenge traditional distinctions using industrial and domestic materials as art and also the conceptual idea that sculptures can incorporate movements, If we can be moved by static sculptures what more if it also function to stimulate all our senses. I discovered the possibility of this idea by observing people responding to my work. In this work, the force of gravity pulls the rice to fall rapidly from a hole and create a calm sound. I feel that when a sculpture has actions, it demands the viewer to look straight at the work. Like two people making a connection using eye to eye contact. It converse, ask humbly for the viewers to empathize and draw their attention to predict the meaning of the work.

During the planning stage, my thoughts are - the action or occurrence draws attention to the passing of time as the dash moment of falling happens. When the movement ends, what is left is the compressed idea of the past - the present (that is already gone) and the future into a single object.

I was looking at Eva Hesse’s work when I was contextualising my ideas. I studied some relationships in her work like how she uses materials which suggests associations to her own emotions. As if her sculptures posses her soul. I find that I can relate to her ideas as an artist. In my case, the burnt rice creates association to my past but I take control of my emotions by responding and predicting my present and future actions.

I also see the rice as a communal and, it represents family. The aspects of our identity being bonded by culture and social behaviour. The pile of rice on the floor is like saying that we are all in a kind of bond. We are all here. Gravity keeps us on the ground. We gravitate with one another. We are all connected.

During the class critique, I heard a lot of thoughtful insights that I wasn’t expecting to hear. My fellow students and tutors might be thanking me for telling my story but they didn’t know how much gratitude I felt from the thoughts they have shared. It made me realise a lot of things.

Now I have constructed a new meaning for this work.

The presence of rice makes me feel that part of me is embodied in the sculpture. It carries a story of myself that I’m trying to impart on everyone. The rice in the bowl is like my gathered experience (good or bad) thoughts, values, and love then releasing it as a form of celebration for everyone. As I have mentioned, I intend to launch the sculpture as in popping a bottle of wine.

Now I understand why I am always making art. Art has always been there when I was young. My father paints because that’s what makes him happy and I feel the same when I am creating. At the same time my mother plays an important role as well. She is always cooking to make us food everyday and doing all the household chores - I think this is a very empowering story which suggests looking at my art in a feminine viewpoint. The idea of cooking is not a sign of weakness and submission but a thriving woman who is always there to raise her family in moments of hardships.

When I was growing up I was full of questions about the world around me. I did not have all the beautiful things in the world but I would say I had a simple, happy childhood. I always remember when my father would say, “I may not have a lot of money or material things in this world but I am rich because I have lots of children, they are my treasure” and I would joke and say sarcastically - “ That’s why we are poor because there’s so many of us”. Every time he earns a little money, he will never buy new shoes or clothes for himself. He will attend his exhibition events wearing an old shirt. He often say, “When you have too many things, sometimes you forget the more valuable things in life.”

I witnessed how many people he inspires with his humility. So many young artists who come to our house everyday to watch him paint. It’s a great feeling to see people getting inspired. It’s a beautiful thing and I want to do the same.

DOCUMENTATION [PRESENTATION/CRITIQUE]

youtube

I watched this documented video all over and over again. I love watching people looking at my work and interacting around it.

References:

Ohnuki-Tierney, E. (1993). Rice as Self: Japanese Identities through time. Princeton, New Jersey: Princeton University Press.

Corby, V. (2010). Eva Hesse Longing, belonging and displacement. London: I.B. Tauris.

Roberts, Veronica. 2014. Converging lines Eva Hesse and Sol Lewitt. Blanton Museum of Art, Texas: Yale University Press.

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kateharks-blog · 7 years ago

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Complimentary Cancer Care Overview

Several people have asked me what I am doing to survive and thrive with stage IV cancer. I am going to provide just a brief overview of the complimentary care that I use in conjunction with my prescribed chemotherapy. I will go into more details on the specific components of my wellness plan at a later time for those who are interested.

Deciding on Treatment:

Cancer patients must decide if they are going to go with conventional cancer treatments, alternative treatments, or a combination of both. As we all know, the first line of treatment for all cancer patients is chemotherapy, radiation, and/or surgery. I think it is pretty standard knowledge that chemotherapy kills cancer cells, but it also kills the healthy cells in your body. There are sources that believe the risks of conventional treatments are more dangerous than the cancer itself. They give some compelling ideas around the powerful pharmaceutical companies and exorbitant finances tied into the cancer industry.

There are two sides to every story. I personally believe that chemo was (and still is) a necessary treatment to get my cancer under control. But I truly believe that it is only one piece of a larger puzzle. If I was going to enable my body to thrive and let the chemo do its work to stop the cancer cells without sacrificing my overall health and well being, I needed to take control of everything that I could control. I needed my immune system and my body to be as strong as possible to allow the chemo to do its job. Therefore, I decided to completely change my lifestyle and take control of my health as much as possible. In order to do that, I incorporated the following complimentary care components into my wellness plan:

Diet - Get the Proper Nutrition:

I wholly believe that changing my diet helped me fight the cancer and is one of the main reasons why I am still here today. Don’t get me wrong, I am not perfect, and I slip up from time to time, but for the most part, my diet has been completely transformed. Following diagnosis, I began reading a number of cancer books that focused on nutrition (I’ll post another write-up on suggested resources). The most frustrating part of this learning curve is that different sources will contradict each other and tell you different things (not the first time this happened in my cancer journey!!). One source will say no meat…the next will say retain meat for protein especially while you are on chemo. Another source will say no fruit because it is high in sugar and the next will say fruit is essential for healing and natural sugars are okay (as long as you don’t go hog wild). The list goes on. I read a lot of books on nutrition and spoke to several nutritionists on the subject to find the best diet for me throughout my journey. I came to the conclusion that if several sources repeated the same thing, I took note. If one source was an outlier in comparison to the others (e.g., no fruit) I went with the majority.

My diet changes included:

Going Organic

Drinking A lot of home-pressed vegetable juice (Using a Twin Gear Juicer)

Drinking Vegetable Protein Smoothies

Eating a good variety of vegetables daily (all colors of the rainbow), mostly raw if your digestive system is capable of handling it

Testing your PH levels to make sure you are getting enough alkaline foods into your body and adjusting your food intake accordingly

Eliminating or Greatly Reducing Processed Sugars

Eliminating or Greatly Reducing Dairy (Use almond, coconut, or other nut or plant-based products)

Eliminating or Greatly Reducing Animal Meats (At minimum only eat organic, grass-fed meat)

Eliminating or Greatly Reducing processed foods

Drinking about 3 cups of green tea each day. It is an excellent antioxidant

Drinking at least 10-12 glasses of filtered water per day (we purchased a whole house filtration system)

Drink a large glass of lemon water first thing in the morning

I can definitely feel the difference the changes I made to my diet have had to this point. I truly believe the reason my body stays strong during my chemo treatments is because I give it the needed nutrients. I have noticed clearer skin, much better digestion, regularity with bowel movements, and overall I feel much better (I can tell the difference when I slip up!)

Add in Key Supplements:

Supplements will not replace the nutrients that you need from food but can give you the added nutrients needed to help your body in the fight against cancer. I do not believe there is one list of supplements that will work for everyone, rather I believe it is very individualized to your body terrain and what your body specifically needs. I turned to the Block Center in Skokie IL to determine my optimal supplement intake. They run extensive blood work to determine your bodies needs. It is important with each new chemo regime that you check with your doctor regarding the supplements you are taking to ensure there is no interactions with that specific chemo. The following are some of the supplements I have added to my diet:

Barley Power,

Cellular Forte IP-6,

Chlorella Spirulina,

Cod Liver Oil,

Curcu-essentials,

Enzyme Essentials,

Green Tea Extract,

Ipriflavone,

L-Carnitine,

Milk Thistle,

N-acetyl Cysteine,

Nutri-essential Plus,

Probiotic Essentials,

ProCal 3 (Calcium),

Resveratrol,

Scute,

Transfer Factor,

Turkey Tail,

UBQH,

Vitamin D3

Keep Your Body Moving and Exercise:

For those of you on chemo, exercise is probably the last thing you want to do. I get it. I have been on chemo for over 3 years now and most days I am so exhausted I feel as though I can barely move! But I still try to do at least 30 minutes of exercise per day. For me that is:

Rebounding (mini trampoline, excellent for the lymphatic system)

Using my recumbent bike or elliptical rider

Dancing to my favorite jams

Fitness classes at the local Cancer Wellness Center

Walking

Water Aerobics (best if you can find a salt water pool rather than a chlorinated pool)

Get into physical therapy if you need help getting started and strengthening your body. Just remember, a body in motion stays in motion!

Go el Natural:

We put a lot of carcinogenic products on or in our bodies every day that contributes to the body’s toxin overload, many of which we don’t even think of. These products often contain carcinogens such as acetone, methylene chloride, parabens, and many others. I slowly started incorporating natural products into my everyday life and ditching the products that contain chemicals and toxins that are absorbed into our skin and body. The following is a list of natural beauty products I use:

Deodorant (Avoid Antiperspirants!)

Sunscreen

Toothpaste

Lotions/Shaving Cream

Make up and Make-up Remover

Hair dye

Nail polish

Lip balm

Feminine Pads and Tampons

Perfume

Hand Soap

Body Soap

Shampoo and Conditioner (all hair products)

Pretty much anything you put onto your body should be natural!

Other Household products:

Cleaning Products

Laundry Detergent

Dishwashing Detergent

Dish Sponges

Cookware (ditch the Non-Stick Teflon Coated, aluminum or copper cookware for Cast Iron, Stainless Steal, or Ceramic)

Air Fresheners (diffuse essental oils instead)

Bed Linens

Lawn care (we went with an organic lawn service)

Remove Additional Toxins from Your Body:

We can reduce a lot of our toxin load by going natural with our body and household products, but there are still numerous environmental toxins that we cannot control. Additional methods I employ to reduce my toxin burden include:

Far Infrared Sauna

Hot Epsom Salt Baths

Clay Foot Soaks

Exercise (as mentioned above)

Coffee Enemas (I have yet to do a coffee enema, or any colon cleansing procedure because I have been a bit too nervous to do it, but many people believe it is very beneficial)

Get Healing Body Treatments:

There are several treatments I do on a regular basis to maintain health and healing in my body. These treatments include:

Acupuncture

Chiropractic Adjustment (I use the Activator technique since I have bone mets)

Massage / CranioSacral Therapy

Reiki / Healing touch

Aryvuda

Reflexology

Use Essential Oils:

There are several essential oils that are thought to have cancer fighting properties and can help with numerous other aliments or side effects. Plus they smell great! I tend to diffuse my essential oils in a diffuser. I will apply specific essential oils to my body using a carrier oil and I also put a few drops of essential oils in my bathtub at night. I have made many of my own beauty products also using essential oils. Some people ingest essential oils (I do not), I prefer topical application or diffusing. My go to essential oils are:

Frankincense - believed to have cancer fighting properties. I apply this at my tumor locations with a carrier oil, use it in my bathtub, and diffuse it

Myrrh - believed to have cancer fighting properties. I often times mix this with Frankincense

Lavender - Good for sleep and relaxation - Diffuse at night time in the bedroom

Peppermint - Relieve sore muscles when used topically, supports digestion and 􏰖􏰃􏰉􏰒􏰗􏰃􏰌􏰄􏰏􏰈􏰒􏰌􏰃􏰈􏰍􏰄􏰈􏰗􏰁􏰉􏰄􏰎􏰃􏰓􏰀􏰒􏰝􏰄reduces nausea, bloating and acid reflux

Lemon - best known for it’s ability to cleanse toxins from the body, stimulate lymph drainage, to rejuvenate energy, purify skin and act as a bug repellant􏰈􏰏􏰉

Tea Tree Oil - ability to treat wounds and is known to have powerful antiseptic properties - Diffuse in the air to purify air of mold and allergens

Purify the Air:

Get some live plants into your house to provide oxygen and help purify the air. According to a NASA study, the following are good options:

Spider Plant (Mother in laws tongue)

Peace Lilly

Pothos

Parler Palm

We also use air purifiers in our house. We have one on every floor in the house.

Get Proper Sleep:

It is recommended that you get 8-10 hours a sleep per night. For me, since I have been on chemo and I know that my body needs extra time to recuperate and heal, I get about 10 hours of sleep per night. To aid in sleeping, I do the following:

Diffuse Lavender essential oil

Keep the bedroom in complete darkness

Take melatonin prior to going to sleep

If my body is in pain I will take a marijuana indica edible which helps with pain and sleep

Relax, Relieve Stress, and Meditate:

We all know that high levels of stress are not good for us but yet most of us are stressed all the time. Especially when you have gotten a cancer diagnosis. The stress and anxiety that comes with this diagnosis often feels overwhelming and at times insurmountable, especially when it is time for scans, MRIs, tests, etc. The “scanxiety” is real and extremely difficult to manage. But yet we often times don’t do anything to help prevent or reduce our stress. I have always carried a lot of stress and I knew I needed to find a way to calm myself down, relax, and de-stress if I wanted to survive.

Meditation was likely one of the most critical things that I implemented to help me survive my cancer diagnosis. Meditating helped me to calm my body and mind so I was not in high gear anxiety mode all the time. It is pretty miraculous what meditating can do for your mind and body if you only give it a chance. The following are a few tips that helped me successfully mediate:

Take a meditation class

Designate a Meditation room or space in your house that is your “happy place”

Use guided meditations to help you (can find through phone Apps, YouTube, etc.

Can incorporate Mantras that you repeat (e.g. Inhale: Health, Healing, Happiness and Love; Exhale: Remove all cancer from my body)

Can incorporate a body scan where you visualize and feel each part of your body and relax it starting at your toes up to your head.

Can incorporate Visualization of your body healing itself and attacking and removing all cancer cells (e.g., Silva Method Meditation)

Additional things I incorporated into my wellness routine that helped calm my stress and anxiety include:

Deep Breathing - I concentrate on breathing deeply throughout the day to keep myself calm

Hypnosis

Acupuncture

Medical Marijuana - can be used to reduce anxiety instead of synthetic anxiety medications

Surround my self with loved ones including my family friends and pets

Do something you love

Travel if you can

Journal or Blog

Repeat Positive Affirmations

Alternative Cancer Treatments

Although I have opted for traditional chemotherapy, I also incorporate additional “alternative”, natural treatments that are believed to be cancer fighting. Some individuals choose these types of treatment over conventional treatment, but for myself, I felt as though a combination of traditional and alternative treatments would give me the best chance for survival. I have included the following elements into my wellness routine:

Essiac Tea - Believed to be cancer fighting. It can be purchased at http://www.essiac-tea.org. Can be taken 1-3 times a day (I drink it nightly before bedtime)

Aloe Absorbsens - Believed to be cancer fighting. It can be purchased at https://www.aloeproductscenter.com/products/purchase. Take one dose, three times a day (i.e. three tablespoons a day), 10-20 minutes before a meal

Fucoidan - Believed to be cancer fighting. I use Zradical which can be purchased on Amazon.

CBD Oil - Believed to be cancer fighting. I am able to purchase my CBD oil at a dispensary since medical marijuana is legal in Illinois. Prior to getting my medical card I purchased CBD oil at https://www.solcbd.com.

Apricot Seeds - Believed to be cancer fighting. Some argue against apricot seeds indicating they contain a chemical called amygdalin, which your body chemically converts into cyanide. Alternative cancer practitioners believe this only penetrates cancer cells and not healthy cells. I am conservative with my apricot seed intake and only take about 9 seeds per day whereas others may take much higher doses. I use the Apricot Power brand.

Rife Machine - I purchased a Rife Machine which is a frequency generator created specifically to kill microbes inside the cancer cells. This machine is believed to work on sarcomas and carcinomas. I purchased mine at: http://www.FrequencyStore.com

There are several other alternative treatments that I have yet to incorporate into my routine but I have considered, including:

High dose Vitamin C infusions

Ozone therapy

Cellect-Budwig Protocol

I may look into these at a future time and will update accordingly. Thank you for reading this blog entry and I truly wish you the best of luck in your cancer journey. Stay strong and fight on!

#cancer #cancer diet #juicing #vegan #diet #alternative cancer treatment #holistic #complimentary cancer treatment #natural #survivor #supplements #meditation #stress reduction #essential oils

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