#i am Making My Own Post bc i'm not trying to start shit with ppl who feel protective of their terms

[fireinanhourglass]

everyday ppl misuse the concept of "intersectionality" wrt trans issues on this god forsaken site and i want to chew my leg off.

the point of "intersectionality" (and I’m using quotes bc its use on this site/most convos is the very pop-philosophy use of the term + not getting into how this also applies to race) is to create a materialist analysis of the cis-heterosexist patriarchy and cleanly identify pathways to liberation.

the reason why we use the term "transmisogyny" is because we recognize that the material liberation of trans women/fems requires the social-economic liberation of both trans people AND women/non-men specifically. Liberation of women without liberation for trans people is how you get TERFs, and liberation for trans people without liberation for women/non-men strengthens sexism. Thus, transmisogyny clearly indicates that you must improve the material conditions of both women/non-men and trans people to liberate trans women and trans fems.

the various attempts to combine trans-masculine oppression (which is real, dont get me twisted) and transphobia fails because there isnt an equivalent breakdown. improving the social-economic conditions of men would not help trans men, but improving the social-economic conditions of trans people would. if trans men were magically assimilated into the patriarchy through an end to transphobia -- if our masculinity was validated as equivalent to cis men -- then we would not experience gendered oppression on the basis of being male, unlike how trans women/fems would continue to be oppressed on the basis of being female/feminine. it is our trans identity alone that undermines our access to male-ness and "liberation*"

goddamn. i dont care if we want to find a term to better articulate trans-masc oppression. i embrace it. i'm all for it. i have been trying to find a way to talk about it in my irl communities. but genuinely, honest to god, i am so tired of seeing a bunch of passive-aggressive BS towards real (or sometimes hypothetical) trans women (and Black feminists/womanists ime) for being uncomfortable with misuse of this analytical framework

*all men experience gendered oppression in the sense that gender roles are policed by patriarchy for reasons that are beyond the scope of this post, but if you are seriously trying to argue that improving the material conditions of men on the basis of their maleness would end hetero-sexism then i have some bad news for you on how capitalism has been pitching itself + the utility of the nuclear family since the industrial revolution. trad wives are not free

[tirfpikachu]

this screenshot from another post actually really hit me hard

trying to make body dysphoria seem inherently worse than body dysmorphia is actually cruel. as someone who developed extremely severe body dysmorphia before dysphoria, i can tell you it's the #1 reason i started hating and harming myself and wanting to die at a young age. i would've 1000% gotten extreme facial plastic surgery to "fix" myself. and while for some it's their road to happiness, if i had it... it personally would've locked me into this fake version of myself, forever wearing a mask. and whenever i'd see someone looking like my past self, a haunting feeling would've come over me. and yet society was encouraging me to "fix" my perceived flaws. it was insanely normalized. it was seen as almost self-care, and a way to better my chances in life as a "prettier" woman. it really fucked me up. you CANNOT look me in the eyes and say shit like "women just want to xyz bc of beauty standards, it's not the same as my much worse severely debilitating dysphoria" without telling my younger self and other young girls that her life-threatening suffering wasn't bad enough, wasn't painful enough, wasn't as bad as anything a trans person goes through. it assumes so fucking much about dysmorphic people. don't brush us off so easily. don't put yourself as inherently in a worse situation when societal misogyny costs real lives. especially since for me, it came from initial bullying at a young age, like many other girls who hate their own bodies & faces. stop belittling our pain.

my dysphoria was very debilitating too, and made me a trans activist for life. but it did come with risks. i developed reverse dysphoria quite quickly after i started growing stubble, and now i'm stuck with that painful dysphoria until i can get expensive laser hair removal. if this is how transfems feel like about their own stubble, holy shit... i'm so fucking sorry. that's a truly horrible feeling. what i can tell you though, is that this is actually a cousin sensation to dysmorphia. dysmorphia & dysphoria aren't as separated as y'all might want them to be, which would make things must simpler ofc. but it's the feeling of visceral disgust, of your body not being good enough, not being you enough. that sucks to think about; we don't want to empower the transphobic crowd into thinking they can magically fix us all. and so, many activists and dysphoric people try to compensate by portraying them as experiences that are completely foreign to one another. as never being related or feeling similar at all, ever. but the thing is, as a previously chronically dysphoric & dysmorphic detrans chick, i can tell you first-hand that it doesn't help anyone to pretend that these aren't often comorbid disorders, and that they actually really do feel similar. and that's okay! no one should take all your treatment options away just because of that. that would be shitty, transphobic, and honestly ableist. but we gotta encourage ppl & their doctors to do due diligence (which my doctor and trans community didn't) and be open to everybody about the risk of regret, of reverse dysphoria, of things not working out the way we think they will. because all that at the very least makes detransitions less painful, even if you personally never detransition. detransitions can lead to very extreme self-hatred, and all the unfortunate consequences of self-hatred. it is a very vulnerable place to be in, and we want to prevent harm. more and more folks are detransitioning because of a lack of information and a focus on celebrating someone's transition early instead of giving proper information. the same should be done with dysmorphic folks - i am both a post-dysphoric and post-dysmorphic person. but many dysmorphic people cannot function without getting surgeries.

and while this is honestly tragic, as anyone needing to go under the knife at all is tragic in a sense... sometimes it is the only life-saving treatment option for the person. for me, i feel so fucking proud of my survival despite years of debilitating disgust at myself, my body and my face. both in a dysphoric and dysmorphic way. but i do not look down on anyone who did have to go through surgeries. i'm just happy to see them smile and feel good about themselves, honestly. but it is a bit bittersweet. how was it, before surgeries, to be dysphoric? to be dysmorphic? i want to read more stories from those eras. how did people find inner peace? did they, in the end? how many didn't survive? what did they have to say? i feel a strange sense of yearning, sometimes. heteropatriarchal society is really weird. it triggers dysmorphia in so many young girls & transmascs. it can also trigger temporary dysphoria in some people, and even permanent dysphoria. and just because certain societal things are a factor in your dysphoria doesn't mean you're lesser for it either - your suffering matters. just like dysmorphic suffering. hating yourself at all is so fucking painful. i wouldn't wish it on my worse enemy, or i'd at least strongly hesitate and they'd need to be an actual monster to deserve it. i love dysphoric & dysmorphic people so fucking much. i don't want us to fight eachother, or shame eachother for seeking treatments when things become too much for us to bear. we need to uplift one another. do everything we can to lessen these feelings in ourselves, of course, as a community of people who hate their bodies and place in society. but if someone chooses to cross over, to take hormones, to have surgeries... i just don't want them to regret it, that's all. and if they don't? if they're happy? i would hug them and breathe a sigh of relief as well. i'd feel bittersweet, almost nostalgic, because i've been there. people who haven't been severely dysphoric or dysmorphic don't fucking understand. hopefully they never will.

[spearxwind]

not to sound weird but what was that work you put in to get where you are 🙏 i want to improve my life so bad but have no clue where to start. even a general gist of things

You dont sound weird! I think it's commendable to want to change your life for the better, and I want to help in any way I can :D

This is also my own perspective but I think a lot of it could be universally applied if you look at it through different lenses of ppls different situations. This also got rly long so I'm putting it under a readmore ^^;

So I had pretty much been isolating myself with increasing ferocity for years until recently. Even when trying to reach out to people I was extremely closed off, keeping my feelings behind many walls and chains always. A lot of my hard work has come from undoing all of that fuckup. I put all my eggs into my online friendships (and even then had a hard time with them).

My behavior was a cluster of personal garbage, learned mannerisms from keeping bad company, and hardwired reactions to specific behaviors. It's something pretty hurtful to realize when you do realize it, but that doesn't mean that you are a bad person or a failure or anything like that. It just means that you have certain bare minimum survival behaviors that worked before but now are only doing you damage, and you have to learn to undo them. (which is a great step!!)

Which brings me to what I have (painfully) learned over the past several years: the basis to any and every good relationship, romantic, platonic, family, or anything is crystal clear communication. Straight up for the love of god communication skills will save your life time and time and time again

And also like I said in earlier posts the solution to wanting to be more social is just BEING more social. This is arguably extremely hard, especially after years of "if they want me around they'll ask me" and always waiting to be invited but not wanting to bother anyone by asking if you can join NO!!!!!!!! GET THAT SHIT OUT OF YOUR BRAIN EFFECTIVE IMMEDIATELY!!!!! It really does NOT work that way at all. People will invite you to things if they see you express interest in them. The same way that in your head you think 'theyll invite me if they want me to go' if they dont see you express interest people will think you dont want to join. If you go someplace and just stay recluse because youre shy they likely will also think "theyre probably not comfortable or dont want to be here, so we wont force them". People are inherently kind and they are definitely NOT thinking about shunting you on purpose (and I am speaking this, genuinely, from personal experience)

While I was studying my major I got close to a group of people and thought of them as my friend group, but they always seemed cold to me, and I rarely got invited to hangouts because they seemed closer among themselves so I ended up always thinking that they didn't really want me around, and created all of these assumptions in my mind about them or what they thought of me.

Years later, recently, I found one of them again just... randomly while walking through the street and we started talking. And in my much better state of mind I asked about this whole thing because I wanted to know how the rest of the group was doing (I care very much for them still) and he revealed to me that THEY were the ones who thought I was shutting myself off of the group bc I didnt wanna be close to them. Which just blew my mind but it made a lot of sense and explained a lot. I was always on my phone too, talking with my internet friends (because it was my comfort zone), so what they'd assumed was that I already had a friend group that I was invested in and so I wasnt going to prioritize them. SO basically this whole thing ended up being resolved with clear communication and would have been solved much earlier if I had just spoken up about it and gotten braver (though my mental state did not let me at the time)

Anytime you are making up assumptions and ultimatums in your mind without communicating them to the other party you should stop and very much go and speak out loud to the other party (or parties) it will genuinely do you good cause huge as hell brain snowballs do nothing but drown you in your own mind.

Also on the being social front, if you dont have the practice in then it will be hard but a lot of it is very much "fake it till you make it" and I genuinely cannot recommend that enough. Inject yourself into conversations and places and act like yourself unapologetically because the secret isnt to craft a persona that you think people will like, its just being yourself and finding people who will love you for who you are. And like I said I just got invested in other ppls plans and asked to be able to go to places, and oftentimes just by expressing interest i got invited "oh I love this show very much!!" "well we have a plan to watch it at my pals house do you wanna come?" "we were planning on going to X place this week" "omg that sounds so cool can I come with" "of course!" Generally people will respond with "the more the merrier" so please dont be afraid to ask. And even if you get a rejection or two it's fine, don't let it discourage you. Some plans are simply not meant to be, and that's totally fine too!

Something else I worked for was reestablishing contact with old highschool friends I'd lost and I missed terribly. I went out of my way to find them again (old phone numbers, old emails, old instagram accounts that hadnt posted since 2019), and I found them!

And most of them really missed me too and were absolutely thrilled I contacted them again, we picked up right where we left off eight years prior. With a lot to catch up to but its genuinely so nice to have them in my life rather than just melancholically thinking about them and wondering if they hated me or anything. Turns out that they had also thought to contact me as well or had tried and lost my phone, or some of them even thought that it was better to leave things as they were to not "stir up shit" so we were all stuck in the same loop of insane thinking without actually confirming it until one of us (me in this case) finally broke the ice (and it took a damn long time too)

The thing is, people are just like you. We all have our own mental nonsense to fight, and we all have our assumptions and propensity to think ourselves into the grave, that's why its so so so so important to communicate things as clearly and as often as possible. Bearing your suffering alone will only make you miserable in the end, and your circle is there to help you

As a last note, I do want to say I have been incredibly lucky, because the friend group I've been adopted into I have met through that one friend from uni that I just HAPPENED to find on the street. I could have not waved him over on the street and just kept walking with my music on and ignored him. I could have said 'no' to his offer to get dinner that day if I'd wanted to be home earlier. I could have never spoken up about liking eurovision and never gotten invited to the hangout where I met my bf. And none of this would have ever happened at all. But that just strengthens my advice of "just say yes and reach out of your comfort zone" because you never know where it's going to lead you!

All this to say:

Communicate clearly with your peers to reduce misunderstandings. More likely than not they'll be in the same boat as you are. (Also extra note. Communication works BOTH WAYS. It needs to come from both parties. It is also a skill you have to nurture and hone!!)

Be kind!! and be loving!! and be yourself unapologetically!!

reach out to people the same way that you'd want to be reached out to. It sucks that sometimes (even often) you have to be the one to do it, but you eventually reap what you sow and people will learn that they can reach out to YOU

People will respond in kind to you being nice to them and a positive energy in their life. Some people will take advantage of it yes, thats just how things are, and its something you have to learn to recognize but you should never let that steel your heart. It is so so so important to remain kind and loving the world needs it so much. We're all out here trying to make our own lives and our loved ones lives a little bit brighter <3

[cios-correct-opinions]

@starrynightarchive

big ol tl;dr for anyone looking:

if ppl "not appreciating" female characters by creating content for them bc they don't want to bothers you that much? there's only one thing you can and should do:

MAKE YOUR OWN CONTENT OR APPRECIATION POSTS OR WHATEVER IT IS YOU THINK PEOPLE SHOULD DO INSTEAD AND STOP DEMANDING PEOPLE CHANGE THEIRS. IF YOUR FANDOM SPACE IS LACKING IN CONTENT YOU WANNA SEE? MAKE IT. DO IT. NOTHING'S STOPPING YOU EXCEPT YOURSELF.

but if you don't wanna do that and you don't wanna pay someone to, then stop complaining.

(note re: the discourse thing/me wanting to "start discourse": i only reblogged onto my "discourse" sideblog bc i didn't want this on my main blog. not bc i think it's automatically discourse. political stuff just goes over here now so i can keep the things more separated for my own sake)

op of the post blocked me but im genuinely baffled at this response

because how in the fuck did you gather ANY of that from me saying this

brother all i did was define what the word means. like i am so baffled as to how you decided that i was implying op was transphobic or some shit bc i absolutely was not!

nor was i trying to start discourse. i was literally just saying that, in my experience in the circles i'm in and the people i've seen, doing both is possible and they often do both. i'm not a huge fan of cis genderbends myself in any direction because if i'm gonna genderbend they're gonna be trans given that i am also trans

and then theres this that i said

which everyone seems to have completely ignored. bc that's the crux of this. it's not that they dislike the canon women it's that they want to take their blorbos they love the most and girl them because that's how fandom works. it's about self indulgence. fandom is supposed to be you doing what you love the most, and engaging with the characters you love the most, bc it's about fun

why are yall trying to force people to post abt characters they may not care for for a number of reasons? bc thats what this feels like. it feels like you want ppl to talk abt, post abt, write abt, draw abt, etc, characters they are not super passionate for, simply bc you believe they should, bc you think what they do in fandom is some kind of formula for their like, actual real world beliefs

i genuinely cannot stress enough to you guys that most peoples actions in fandom are almost entirely divorced from any political meaning. or at least, they were, until people started acting like that was a sin actually and that if you liked this character or if you liked too many male characters and not enough female ones that means youre secretly a misogynist who just hates women so much because you don't post about them all the time

most of my fandom blorboposting ends up being about a handful of any random assortment of characters because that's who my brain latches on to, but that doesn't say shit about my feelings about any other character. specifically in bsd, i mostly post and talk about literally two of the characters WAY more than the others bc they are my favorites. this includes ALL the other characters, just about. most of my fanworks are for them and will continue to be for them because they are my OTP and my top two in this series.

why is this important?

because someone genderbending a male character or multiple of them in order to see a CHARACTER THEY ALREADY THINK ABOUT 24/7 AND LIKE A LOT AND HAVE A DEEP ATTACHMENT TO, as a woman, does not mean they don't love and appreciate the canon women. holy shit. that's what i was criticizing in the original post.

also like. most of the ppl doing the genderbending i see are either women or like, somehow woman-aligned, or wlw/attracted to women in some way, etc. and most of them are making these genderbends bc theyre attracted to the canon character. it's self-indulgence it's ALMOST ALWAYS self-indulgence guys it's FANDOM that's what it's FOR you CANNOT FORCE SOMEONE TO CARE ABOUT A CHARACTER FOR ANY REASON AND STILL MAKE AN ETHICAL ARGUMENT OUT OF IT JFC

it wasn't meant to be discourse on my end either. i was trying to offer an alternate reason or perspective of approaching what op seemed to think was an issue given the wording of the post, by offering my personal experience. i also never said op was wrong, by the way, my expression of disbelief was also put alongside me going "maybe it's just the people i follow" because i tend to follow people who, when they do genderbends, are also avid fans of the canon women too, they just like the men they're genderbending more. hence why they're doing that.

this expectation within fandom that people must create content of female characters - or ANY characters - lest they be accused of despising them or not appreciating them is going to be the death of fandom and i'm so fucking serious. you CANNOT insist people spend their time making shit for FREE that they aren't 100% jazzed and excited about in FANDOM SPACES and then get mad when they don't do that and expect fandom to be something that continues for generations as it has in the past

and for the record seeing as how op reblogged with this which. where do i even start lmao. ik they've written me off as a woman-hating misogynist so i'm not expecting good faith arguments in response from them but, c'est la vie

[inchidentally]

Firstly just want to say I love your posts and opinions <3 Sorry this is a bit long, I only lurk around so I wanted to share my thoughts with someone (if that’s alright!)

As a Lando fan through all his teammates, I really love his dynamic with Oscar the most. I love that Lando always brings up how good Oscar is (even though everyone in the world loves to spread the narrative that Lando is washed because a rookie beat him*), and I love that Oscar is always supportive of Lando’s achievements too. They both put the team first before all else, and what happens in the race will stay in the race (no hard feelings after). Despite what the media pushes them to say or the narratives in articles, they both have a quiet understanding of each other and a lot of respect. What they have now is really sweet and I’m really hoping none of this would change for the years to come, even if they have a race winning car. Of course as a Lando fan first, I want him to win all the races, and I’m sure Oscar fans want Oscar to win all the races, but I hope that everyone can also learn to let what happens in a race stay in the race, just like them. For me anyone who shades/hates on either of them in any way just gets an instant block, I don’t want to hear it <3

*I hate how people always turn to shitting on Lando instead of saying Oscar is also good and equally competent?? I know Lando is supposed to be more experienced but he’s also young and he’s apparently never allowed to make mistakes. And I think not giving Oscar the credit is also disrespectful to him.

I also do hope this year they are even more comfortable with each other and will hang out more outside of races (even if they don’t share it). More than the media stuff, I am always so much more happy when they do something on their own, like how we found out Oscar was also in one of the planes from the recreating Instagram photos video, or that photo of them playing cards, that photo of them eating together in the paddock, or “what happened in Vegas stays in Vegas” that still haunts my mind….. (hate Vegas GP though, burn it).

tldr; Oscar is good for Lando and Lando has always been good in Oscar’s eyes, and can next season come faster

tysm anon and I'm sorry to be so late replying !!

god I am the same anon - I don't personally have favorites bc his dynamic with Carlos and Daniel was so much abt him being the baby duckling (and that on track Lando struggled privately w insecurity so much his rookie season whereas his confidence was building separate from what Daniel was experiencing). but what I love about the Oscar era is the way Lando just like, blossomed into McLaren being his home and his team when Oscar made such strong gestures to acknowledge Lando that way.

like so many ppl questioned Lando's ability to be in the senior/experienced/leadership role and wondered if he'd always prefer to be a little brother for a couple more years yet (and I think Lando wondered that too).

god yea I am so happy to leave ppl who try to pit teammates against each other in their own filth. like, enjoy being full of impotent rage ig?? bc apart from a VERY few instances these teammates are always able to be professional - and if they were already friends, remain friends. not only has Andrea instilled this from the start with Lando and Oscar, neither of them literally ever has had a history of friction w teammates or w each other. we've been through Monza before their relationship had even gotten settled so we're fine lol

and anon so far I'm genuinely amazed at how much content we're getting of them, of their own volition and McLaren's sm. the McLaren media fell off so hard right when the double podiums happened so I was worried that was how it was going to stay for 2024. hopefully stays this way!

[ashsostrange]

I'm honestly surprised at the amount of people who are still supporting him.He's got his little ((whats left of them at least)) fan base wrapped around his fingers.

“ He’s a minor he cant think for himself, his brain ain't developed!!” “ You don't know what it's like for him at home!” my fav so far “y'all are ablest and racist!! Yall don't care about black people!”

Bitch no one gives a fuck that he is black!! Motherfucker is telling people/threatening to eat glass to get away from what he's said to people. Calling someone out for gaslighting and trying to manipulate people with that shit ain't racist. Also using self diagnosis and laying about taking pill that will “get you high” as a way to get out of all his call outs. This is the stupidest shit I have seen while being on tumblr for the past three or so years like damn!!💆🏾‍♀️

perioddd!! lemme talk my shit again

i honestly giggled when his bf tried to say “y’all hate black people” when pretty much everyone speaking on him is black. why would i do that bc he’s black?? i’m black, not to mention a darskin girl. do with that info what you will.

ppl wna make us seem like bullies so bad. this isn’t just about what happened w catty, hell, it’s hardly about her at all! it’s ab his behavior in general. it’s inappropriate! if he would’ve just owned up, there wouldn’t have been a problem. i’m not obsessed w this nigga, i don’t care to go out of my way to make a post ab him everyday. he’s the one who escalated this further. he only wants us to “mind our business” when we’re not coming for his neck.

ab his mental health, if he doesn’t have a real diagnosis, he needs to not claim mental illnesses like that, but rather acknowledge that something is wrong with him. if you make a mistake, you need to not blame every damn thing on your said mental illness. if anything it’s a justification, but never an excuse. take the initiative to look at yourself and decide if you’re in the right headspace to be on the internet or not. i struggle with mental health, but not in the way he allegedly does. if ik i’m not in the right headspace for something, i step away. he needs to do that. and invest in a diary.

i genuinely don’t know why people are defending him when he did this to himself. if woulda stopped riding my dick like beyoncé rode that surfboard, then maybe we wouldn’t be here right now. accountability isn’t a bad thing. we’ve all made mistakes. i know i’ve made many, it’s about how you address them that matters.

i was literally defending his lame ass when he was sending inboxes as an anon to cause more mess between these two girls. yao was saying he was behind the anon and obv i didn’t believe her bc it wasn’t making sense to me at the time, and there was no real way to prove it. but then he started sending her hella inboxes and tagged all his mutuals saying “war has begun” a whole day later. when i tell you i showed one of my bsfs that post and we LAUGHEDD 🤣🤣🤣 nigga this is tumblrrrr, not a battlefield! from that day i’ve been watching him lmao. didn’t wna say anything about his behavior until i gathered more info cuz i’m not a mean girl (and didn’t want his army bombarding my inbox), but this is ridiculous.

and i’m so glad lia dmed me one day so we could discuss his weirdness. we literally played his ass and he didn’t know. bro was sending her msgs talking ab “i liked your new fic, but you blocked me” and he was the only one she had blocked recently. he sent so many hateful msgs under anon after that, nd he was reblogging it acting like it wasn’t him like… ok weird nigga.

i’m not ableist or “racist” (i’m literally fucking black!) fuck i gotta b ableist for? i’m the last person to rock w any kind of tomfoolery, and all my mutuals and irls know that. i’m unapologetically me on this blog. what you see is who i am.

“he’s a minor!!” so are the rest of us dealing with his bs bro. i’m literally SIXTEEN 😭

like i said, in most situations, if multiple people (with good morals) are telling you that you’re wrong, you can’t be right. i was never disrespectful with him to begin with. you get disrespectful with me, i get disrespectful with you. don’t care who you are ✌️like thank yewww

[bulliness]

(cw for mentions of sexual assault) Speaking of, it's been driving me CRAZY because I've seen not one but multiple LGBT people proudly "come out" as pedophiles recently and then claim they were only getting hate for being LGBT like if y'all don't read the fucking room... "thought crime" my ass. I really don't vibe with the idea that because someone is sexualizing something on the Internet that means they can't possibly be doing that crime in real life. My older sibling was in online spaces regarding anime, furries, fandom etc. I won't go into details but he sexually abused multiple children, family members, and animals. Whenever I see someone bragging about these things and showing no remorse online I can't convince myself they aren't doing it irl! I know it's my trauma but it really happened to me it does cause real harm, I have PTSD and am constantly suicidal. "thought crime" im sure child abusers are giddy as hell about the pro pedo sentiment that's getting more popular in spaces that used to be more safe. I feel like I'm going to chew off my arm. Sorry, something about imaginary sister in your post made me go !!! bc I was the sister but I definitely wasn't imaginary, yk? In the past couple years I keep seeing these 4chan esque morally reprehensible arguments that make no sense. "kill the cop in your head that says assaulting people in their most formative years is wrong" bitch do you hear yourself?! I've been here a long while and I miss the days you could talk about wanting to kill your rapist when this site was, at the very least, larping as feminist. I'm literally too scared to bring this up on my own blog bc sometimes pedos will send ppl who disagree with them csam. Also I'm not trying to start the most triggering rancid internet shit storm ever in my notifs :/ I did not mean to write out this much omg. You dont have to post this btw lol

No you're fine!! I completely agree that people have gotten way more comfortable being open about being into these things in the name of "queerness" and it actively detrimental to the community.

There was a time when even I was being accused of pedophilia baselessly, that thankfully didn't result in any harassment because all my mutuals called the anon on their shit. So like, yeah, there's baseless accusations and hate campaigns against innocent trans people (mostly women).

But the whole point is that these women DON'T have "MAP" or "big sister" or whatever in their bios. The second you do that shit, you stop being a victim to me because you thought what you jerk off to was more important than the safety and comforts of people that faced abuse.

It's just really frustrating having to scan every tag and post on a blog before following, just in case they're a secret freak. He'll, the reason I didn't know about this blog is because her tag for it wasn't something I'd thought to check on her blog. Actually pisses me off.

Anyway I hope you can avoid this stuff as much as possible. This is quite literally the first time I've been caught off guard like this, because everyone I follow is chill and rarely get into arguments with these people. Good luck 💜

[shiftingconfessions]

https://www.tumblr.com/shiftingconfessions/750191217252483073/and-its-invalidating-of-a-poc-experience-to-just?source=share

Now, I don't know how my response is victimising, or why my response is apparently "limiting" and why u think I'm trying to make shifting seem like some sort of antithesis for freedom (btw fix ur spelling before u start coming at ppl), bc i was simply calling out how u were telling someone to ignore and not talk about an actual problem in this community, a problem which i might add has affected them their entire life that they wanted to express their opinions and feelings about, but I will say this;

In the OPs post they prefaced their ask by saying about how ppl are gonna shit on u if u state ure uncomfortable with something, which is exactly what u proceeded to do in ur response to that ask, proving their point. In said ask, they addressed an actual problem within this community, which is ppl shifting for other races for the wrong reasons, and in ur response, u told them to just block and ignore it. Ignoring ACTUAL problems like these is exactly what is going to turn this good community into a shit one.

Now, I am obviously aware of the fact that I can not control other ppls shifting journeys/the realities they choose to shift to and their reasoning for doing so, but if advice or certain perspectives can be given to cause ppl to consider changing certain ignorant beliefs and reasons for shifting, then it should be given.

This belief is a much bigger problem that affects multiple POC, and I'm glad OP used their experiences to show why its so harmful to carry such views. So if u don't like it, take ur own advice, scroll past, and block.

.

[daz4i]

I'm having some thoughts regarding posts I've seen on my dash both recently and like, years ago, bc this is far from a new phenomenon. this isn't @ anyone specific nor am i going to give specific details bc it really is an expansive thing so like. to whoever needs to hear this ig

stop engaging with things in the worst faith reading possible. start giving people the benefit of the doubt i am begging you

9/10 of times, the person you see who might be slightly insensitive, or enjoys content you find harmful, or is using the wrong term for smth, is doing it out of ignorance on the matter

and most of the times it isn't smth they can just google to figure out. bc sometimes you really gotta do mental gymnastics or ignore every redeeming quality of a thing to find the harmful part. and usually unless a person is directly involved in activist circles or knows abt the history of a particular community etc they will never make that connection and I'm sorry to tell you, but that's most people you will encounter, both irl and online

9 times out of 10 there is no malice involved. attacking strangers because you think they are attacking you by doing a very normal thing (like quote a meme or enjoy a movie) isn't the way to gain anything, and you're more likely to cause antagonism in that person

it's good to inform others, but doing it by accusing them of harmful behavior isn't the way

also on a less deep note, you're just gonna become an incredibly unpleasant person to be around if you keep doing that shit. if you keep looking for the bad in everything you see others enjoy, you will keep seeing it. you will become extremely bitter. you gotta give people the benefit of the doubt for your own sanity fr

and before I'm taken out of context: no that doesn't apply to actual bigots (my whole point here is that most ppl just aren't informed and aren't actively hateful). no this isn't me telling you to be nice to your own oppressors so they hate you less. no this isn't me saying you have to let slide media that is genuinely harmful (I'm talking more about the people who consume it who are average and don't hold some secret ill intentions). yes I'm aware a lot of times people ARE bigots and just try to hide it which is why dogwhistles exist, which is exactly why i think it's important to remain informed and inform others so we stop engaging with these people or their content (i just think that doing it in combative ways is bad for everyone involved). ok i think that covered all my bases

tldr just. remember that people are people. and people can make mistakes. and you gotta let them grow from it. and sometimes, you are the one who makes the mistake, by assuming the worst of someone you don't even know

[theshelbyslimited]

KIA ORAAA (HELLO)

It has been SOOO LONGGG since i've been properly active on here and it'll probably remain that way until December once this final term is over (the pros of having summer at the end of the year is that everything finishes in time for Christmas).

I'm too lazy to fully explain what's been going on bc life has been all over the place but I'll bullet point some 'highlights' (WARNING! IT'S LONG! I WON'T BLAME YOU IF YOU DON'T READ IT ALL)

I've been attending groups at this local 'foundation' that offers wahine/women's groups for those in my area. A Creative Cooking class that's been so much fun and surprisingly beneficial (I'm definitely not the Gordon Ramsay I had myself convinced I was just bc I could make an omelette 🤣), a general Monday Boost group which is basically a space for wahine/women whether they are māmās/mothers or just women seeking a safe space to be around likeminded ppl (we've done some fun stuff in that one) and two more that i'll extend on in the next bulletpoint.

I've been slowly reconnecting my native indigenous realm. So little fact that may not be entirely known is I'm a wahine māori, I'm of indigenous roots to Aotearoa/New Zealand. Although both of my parents are Māori, colonization had a deep impact on my whānau/family went it came to passing down the reo/language and culture. My Dad knew Te Reo Māori and was planning to teach it to me but he passed away before it could happen and my Mum never learnt it as her father/my poppa was raised during the time where our people were punished for speaking their mother tongue at school or even in public space, therefore influencing him to not teach it to his children. As I've gotten older, I've yearned to connect with Te Ao Māori (The World of Maoridom) and connect with the deeper roots and strands of my identity as an indigenous woman. A lot of the women in the groups I've been attending are also Māori/indigenous women so we've all been journeying through, trying to connect with Te Ao Māori in a way that isn't pākehā-fied or basically milked down to fit the white standard in our country. I decided to do a free online Te Reo Māori course I discovered online after reestablishing my deep want to know the language of my ancestors and it's been so fulfilling (I have the worst memory though so utilizing it isn't going too well so far). I've been attending a group called 'Aua Hoki' which basically means 'I don't know' in the sense where we do different things every group class regarding Te Ao Māori whether it be: digging into our whakapapa (our genealogy/lineage), waiata (song/music), pūrākau (stories) and Toi (Māori arts). This particular group has helped me connect so much more with my ancestry and I feel like I've found that part of me that's been missing for so long (partially anyway). I've also only recently started going to a Raranga group. Raranga literally means 'to weave' which is basically what we've been doing and although it's a lot harder than I thought it would be, seeing the end result of ones own creation can be so fulfilling.

I've been HELLAAA baking. I posted before about how baking has become a thing for me but holy shit, my whānau/family are loving it so I'll probably keep it up just for them. It's been interesting trying different recipes whether they be sweet or savoury and being able to share the kai/food with those I love. I think my personal favourites because they're so deeply ingrained in my whānau/family are: Fry Bread and Māori Bread (feel free to look them up). They're basically the same dough but one, you fry and the other can simply be baked in the oven. Such recipes have been baked and cooked all the way back to my Great Grandmother and perhaps, even before then. I think I enjoy those the most because I feel like I'm continuing that tradition on for my generation and hopefully one day, I can pass it onto someone of the next generation.

I think I've rambled moreee than enough. I am so sorry for how long this is, when I get started I just can't stop sometimes 🤣 Aroha nui (much love) to you if you actually managed to make it to the end of this and read every single rambly thought of mine.

I'm sending so much love and awhi (a way of saying support) to every single one of you, it's nearly December (what the fuckkkk 😱) so thank you for being with me throughout the duration of this crazy year. We're in it for the long run now and I know we'll all make it through, I'll make damn sure of it. I'm only a message away for ANYONE who may need someone to vent to, some words of love or just a friend to kōrero/talk to.

Stay safe angels ❤️

C x

[panicv0mit]

seeing the netflixvania posting im so fucking sorry. ive yet to watch it (will suffer through it with my friend who, like myself, is also a long time castlevania fan) and this is like. seeing a forest go up in flames and deciding to walk in anyway.

my expectations were low but it seems i'll have to set them even lower. what have they done to my favorite belmont

My netflixvania posting is but a crumb compared to all the shit I got stored in my brain but if I started rambling it would never end (except I am gonna ramble a lil bit now) spoilers (?) incoming.

Let me just say that the first 2 seasons of netflixvania were actually pretty good, I loved the final fight in season 2. It was FINE, it ended on a decent note, opened the door for the other Belmonts to step in etc etc........and that's not what they did at all. They just HAD to make 2 more fucking seasons and those had MAJOR issues between the severe mischaracterization of Hector and Alucard (I COULD GO ON AND ON ABOUT HECTOR ALONE) and disgusting unnecessary SA scenes...it was fucking abysmal. And you know what? It hurt to watch like genuinely. Everything that could have gone wrong in a show did go wrong. I liked Isaac's story, Sypha and Trevor were fine. But the horrible writing could not hold the show together at all. I was RELIEVED when it ended but OOPS SORRY!!!! AT THE VERY END THEY LET DRACULA PASS ON WITH HIS WIFE!!!!!!!! HEEHEE!!!!! HOOOHOO!!! Let me ask you a question. Walk with me here, friend. What is the story of castlevania? Who are they fighting? If you answered Dracula, then you're correct.

I'm not saying you have to keep resurrecting the same villain over and over again, HOWEVER. Dracula is a ginormous part of Richter's story. THAT'S THE WHOLE THING!!! BELMONTS VS DRACULA!!!! AND THEN ALUCARD WAKES THE FUCK UP AND IS LIKE AW SHIT THE CASTLE IS BACK!!!! They literally locked themselves out of TWO storylines!!!!! There will be no rondo, no symphony. They are using the characters in name ONLY. and it fucking BLOWS. I was actually somewhat excited to see the new series, I wanted to see Richter really bad he's my GUY....and then the reality set in and I'm wait a minute....NO...NOOO NOOOOOO!!!!!! bc I knew in my heart they were gonna fumble and fuck up severely. And they ARE! I am THREE episodes in and I have felt NOTHING, the show just isn't doing it for me. The pacing is fucking weird, dialogue feels unnatural sometimes, and the overall story is just.. meh. Especially with Richter. If Annette was the only main character, I wouldn't be so disappointed bc her part is really the only one that matters, it's clear she has more of a focus put on her instead and THATS OKAY! but for us Richter fans it feels so empty, he as a character in this show feels like fucking wet cardboard. They're giving him NOTHIN. That's not him at all. It feels off everything feels wrong. The first episode was the worst so far. There was no set up, no slow pacing, just them going from plot point to plot point like they were checking off a list. It all plays out, in my opinion, like if someone was fucking around in AI dungeon and trying to make their own castlevania. That's how unnatural things feel at times. As I'm writing this I'm like losing train of thought like what am I even saying I HAVE NO IDEA. At the end of the day, it's just a huge let down. My expectations were low and initially watching it isn't THAT bad, but when I sit down and let my mind simmer on it...I just get kinda sad. Why do they keep letting ppl who clearly don't know anything about castlevania in general write these shows. I don't feel passion from it. It shows horribly. I don't wanna see another one after this but no they've already confirmed season 2 and Alucard is gonna roll up and they're gonna do whatever the fuck idk. I'm gonna go play curse of darkness and symphony of the night and make out with my wife Hector or somethin

[allianaavelinjackson]

HAPPY BLORBO BLURSDAY LIA!!! *pops a party popper right in your face

What would your characters do if they received a love confession? (from someone they don't like in return, from someone they DO, or both. yes this is free reign to rant abt anaya and raylen I wanna learn more about them)

*collapses dramatically like I've been shot*

well actually I want to answer this so

*gets up and dusts self off*

this is a Very Interesting Question because I too am Deeply Invested in my sapphic children but I'm also excited to answer this for the others so it's gonna be a long one

ok so I'll start off with kyri because I feel kyri is actually on the aroace spectrum or she's just straight up aroace, and she's more on the queerplatonic angsty relationship side than the actual romance side, so if someone confessed to her then rip said person most likely, get them a tissue for the brutal rejection. ordinary sane ppl probably would not have a crush on kyri tho

Julien? I'm not sure about him but he gives Gay Repressed and honestly its a toss up between him running away blushing and screaming or his heart skips one (1) beat and he's an asshole to love interest for the next 2 weeks. good luck getting him to divulge anything until he's ready, which is probably sometime next century. if he gets a confession from someone he doesn't like back he'll probably be nicer because he has No Feelings Involved he'll just be like aw that's nice :) with his Formal Ass Manners and be like I Appreciate The Admiration Thanks For The Courtesy

KALLAN??? oH BOY. ok so you know those screenshotted Tumblr posts of Beautiful Dumb Bisexual Boy. yeah that's him in the romantic world. that's literally him. his responses range from a finger gun to the cheesiest pickup line, and it's so cheesy youll wish you never confessed in the first place. that's for if he doesn't like you back tho so like rip. I feel like kallan would literally be the crush of every single straight girl in the academy and then he ends up with a boy as his first kiss or smthg so like yeah he probably gets confessions regularly but ppl think him and Raylen are dating for like months and it is a great source of internal pain to Anaya (poor girl) but really they're just a couple of bi af besties. anyway if he does like you back he'll probably have this v serious face and insist on talking it all out and stuff he's cute af

Ok RAYLEN,,

I feel like she's got the like. top vibes. but she's a simp. but top vibes. and she'd like play it cool. and she'd be the type to go LET'S FUCKING GOOOOOO in private after they kiss or whatever and Anaya would be looking thru the door and laughing. if she doesn't like you back then she'd probably let you down really gently and seriously cuz Feelings Are Important to her. I won't go too much into detail but I'll talk about Raylen and Anaya as a ship later on

and Anaya. ok this is probably the one I have the most thoughts about, because I want Anaya to be a really emotionally complex character. so she'd probably also let you down very gently because one thing for Raylen and Anaya is that emotions are very important tm and they're both very emotionally intelligent. but if she receives a confession from someone she liKes? bro would combust. bro wouldn't be around for the next step. bro takes her own feelings wayyyyy too seriously. she's obsessed.

I feel Anaya is more of the person to drop hints and do the whole confession thing and MAKE the moves tbh. and Raylen somehow manages to evade every single one while trying to tell anaya as well, because she's Dumb.

them as a ship? would be a really interesting dynamic because they both are simps in different ways, like Anaya is the shit she wore xx item today help and Raylen is the I don't know what color your shirt even is but I'll die for you in combat rn if you like

and Anaya suffers greatly bc of this. neither of them would make any moves at first tho like it would be a really really really really really really really really really slow burn, and Anaya just ignores it until she just Cannot and Explodes. she's the aware one and raylens the dumb one. not in the sense that Raylen doesn't notice, she just notices and thinks Oh Friendship :) idk what the blushing is for tho maybe it's just the weather.

Poor Dumb Queers, the lot of them.

I would do more for Zophie and Chase but I think this post is long enough as a debut writeblr post

this was actually rlly fun even tho I accidentally deleted it once and cried for half an hour so THANKS SER I appreciate it looking forward to More Asks!!!!

[barry-j-blupjeans]

✨, 💫, 🎀, 🍭 for the fic asks, if you want!

✨What's a fic you've posted you wish you could breathe life into again and have people talking about it? (or simply a fic you wish got more credit)

look. i know Archaeology Excavation on My Body is for the specific niche audience of ppl who like taz and also have chronic pain. however. validation? thank you. lsdfsdf

💫what is your favorite kind of comment/feedback?

I do love me some unhinged screaming, but I also just love when ppl take the time to go through what they noticed/liked about something. Even if it's just one little scene they comment about, or a specific word choice, it makes me happy that ppl are not only picking stuff up but also enjoying it. and telling me why or how they enjoy it, or how they can relate to it, or whatever.

i rr try to make the characters more Human (for lack of a better word sdlfksd) bc it's vv easy to get sucked into the 2D characterization, especially in big fandoms. so whenever anyone tells me that they relate to the characters or that I've shown them in a new light they hadn't previously considered, that is the Good Shit 👏👏👏

🎀give yourself a compliment about your own writing

i think i do description pretty good? dialogue can be trickier for me but I'm always pretty proud of my ability to get the Vibe of the scene correct, even without characters speaking.

🍭why did you start writing?

to make myself understood, even if i didn't get it at the time. I've always had a Lot of speech problems, even if I learned to talk pretty early. i have a vv bad speech impediment that i still struggle and slip up on. i also have tons of anxiety that sometimes manifests in just not being able to talk at all. writing is kinda what i fell back on, bc i had so much I wanted to say, and it was the only way i knew how to get the words to come out.

it was also one of the only ways i could talk or explore my hyperfixations as a child in a way that didn't end up being "annoying". I'm sure there's deffo some rsd looking back on memories of trying to share stuff with ppl, but it was always very embarrassing realizing that no one cared quite as much as you did about a certain subject.

writing was feasibly the only way i could confidently say words without the words being wrong or bad. no one had to read it if they didn't want to, no one had to "entertain" my ideas and i didn't have to struggle around words my mouth just Would Not pronounce correctly.

this + having a lot of free time as a kid + being one of the few ppl in my class who actually enjoyed poetry units just kinda ended up with me being where i am today. and i still kinda have the same motivations as then- just... the want to be understood and the yearning to share the things i love.

[lycheecreature]

hrhnghgggg vent 👎 don't read this unless ur ready for giant block of whining. tldr:

I literally feel soooo guilty complaining abt this esp cause I've def done it already in different terms but it's been boiling for so long idk I need to like :/ break it down a little I guess. same shit different day etc etc

I feel like its really fucking with me that as I make larger steps to actually,,, have coherent story content I keep getting excited to share stuff and then I end up super disappointed and fucking embarrassed when it totally flops 💀 esp when I was gonna try and share more of my writing and?? I know I'm not entitled to anyone's time or interest but even friends never got back to me on it and it's like,, yeah realistically I didn't expect everyone to give detailed feedback or even read it necessarily bc yeah ppl are busy I get it and i dont wanna blame anyone,, it's just the fact that I struck out every. single. time!?? Couldnt even get a single one? Even if it was negative feedback, at least I'd have some idea of what I might need to work on.

Now I'm even more self concious about sharing it than I was before, and I don't even know what it is that I'm embarrassed about other than a nebulous sense of "bro nobody cares." And yea i probably *should* try to promote it more! Except now i feel awkward and shameful and concieted for it! But again I don't want to guilt anyone bc its not like,, the fault of any specific person. On an individual level I get stuff slips by and ppl have plenty of their own shit going on, I've def done the same. Plus, if someone was gonna read my stuff, I'd want it to be bc they wanted to and not bc I heckled them into it yknow :/ just makes me sad

Then of course I get super fucking jealous of everyone else who does actually does get praise and attention which also makes me feel like a horrible person. I know part of it is just that I don't have the best social skills (to put it lightly) but mannn. The more this happens to me over and over again the less motivated I feel to try and start conversations. I'm getting real weird and paranoid over it, and it's getting worse the longer I don't talk about it while simultaneously reaffirming my belief that there is no one for me to talk to. Regardless of if that's even fucking true. And because I am Too Sad, I hardly even have the energy to hold a normal fucking conversation.

Idk, I felt like I had a similar dumb angst during artfight. And artfight wasn't even bad for me, esp compared to like the first year i did it when hardly anyone I attacked even acknowledged that I'd done so 🫠 ofc this is 100% *not* the fault of the ppl I attacked!! I had fun interacting w everyone and seeing their stuff! But I was kinda sad that I initiated everything except for an attack from one random person who doesn't follow me. Its like,, I absolutely do not ever expect to be first on anyone's list, but damn I was hoping I could at least be like... eighth or something??( <- petty ass baby complaint. )

Literally the only conclusion I can come to is that I need to train myself better to Never Expect Anything. I'm actually so terrified that I must obviously be an entitled egocentric asshole for getting crazy over this. God. Idk my real life is already very pathetic and lonely rn and I am constantly deeply ashamed of myself for not being better. Can't even blame The Autism for this shit bc apparently so many of the people who are actually able to foster communities also have The Autism. It's literally just a Me problem.

To be clear, I still very much enjoy making things and my little story and I'd be making the things regardless of if I posted them or not so I might as well try to share them. And I'm wellllll past expecting to ever be majorly successful as an artist or anything. Everything's just been making me feel bad lately. Been writing a bit again and I'm glad for that, but then whenever I'm getting too excited about it I have to stop myself and be like "hey man don't get your hopes up. no one's gonna be that into it." I have to remind myself like yeah I knowww it's not marketable it doesn't have everyone's favorite tropes and character archetypes. Even if *i* constantly seek out unusual content I am definitely *not* representative of the general media consuming populace or the art community or the oc community. And i will not fucking change anything just to be more palatable for Consumers. Just wish I wasn't soooo lonelyyyyyyy. Or that I could at least get an idea of what I'm missing here.

Uhhh on the off chance you did read this whole thing PLEASE PLEASE DO NOT FEEL BAD OR GUILTY FOR ANYTHING ABOUT ME I am very mentally ill. idk maybe its the daylight savings. sad ant with bindle dot jpeg.

[golbrocklovely]

I don’t want to sound rude, by any means, because i love your blog, but sometimes it kinda terrifies how much you guys obsess over Colby. You know who he follows, when he was with who, things that he doesn’t posts on his social media, you remember exact dates and timelines of what happened in his relationships with other people, when he was with who on the exact date etc etc. And all of this (well mostly) is not visible on his social media, it’s just stuff that you follow up. I know you guys are fans, but don’t you think you sometimes are looking too much into his life? Even if you are not a hater ( and i am talking to all the people) and do not hate on his every move, don’t you think that it might make him uncomfortable that you guys know something before he announce it officially? Like f.e his relationship with Malia. Almost all fans knew he was hooking up with her before he officially posted her and announced that he is with her. This dude cannot have a normal life and it’s not only haters that make it difficult for him, but also his own fans that stalk and note his every move.

i can't speak for every fan that does similar things to me, but i'll speak for myself on this.

originally, a lot of my seeking out info was just from pure curiosity. like, way back when i was in the jonas brothers fandom, i was the same way; always curious as to who they were dating. that's always been something i'm interested in. and when it came to colby, who was seemingly starting something new with a new girl every couple weeks, it became interesting to see how things would play out.

but to explain myself a little bit, one, most of the shit i talk about on here is strictly my opinion on the situation. i never claim to be saying what's actually happening, just what i think is happening. bc i know for a fact i don't know everything going on in his life. and two, a lot of the times i would base my opinions off of a, what he posted, b, what other fans have told me/talked about and then c, my assumption trying to connect what a and b are saying.

his dating life before malia is very much just a guessing game bc no girl has ever been confirmed by him. but what would usually happen is first he would follow them and then eventually the girl would post something on her story about him, tagging him, and that would alert fans. and in most of those situations, i was never the first to hear about it. i was just told it by other fans or fans would repost what said girl would post and that's how i would see it. there's a reason why every girl he's apparently been with has had a nickname on here. i've tried my best to make sure none of the girls get found out strictly bc i know how mean this fandom can be. plus a random girl he might be seeing for a week doesn't need to have 1000s of eyes on her randomly just bc she tagged him in a story.

when it comes to who he follows, i don't really pay much attention to that, and never really have. but sometimes i check in just bc i'm nosy. i'll admit that lol

as for malia, colby posted her on his story in early december of last year. then by his birthday the pics of them on nye got leaked by someone and shared all over the place. and when ppl would bring her up on here, i still only called her m. so by that point ppl just assumed they were dating. plus once he basically alerted everyone to her presence, it became easy to just go to her page, see she posted a story with him and then context clues it together that they were dating.

and on xplrclub he tried to walk back the pics and tagging her by saying that was a mistake, only to post her three-ish months later as his gf sksks

i do get what you mean, however. i think there are fans that go way too far when comes to him and his life. i mean there are fans that full on stalk him, find out the hotels they are staying at, the airbnbs, and then will find out where they are and in what city. those are the fans i'm concerned about. the fans that still think they have a chance with him. the fan that genuinely believes sam cockblocked her from getting with colby and then doxed katelyn on a twitter space… yeah, those fans are nuts. is what i do also kinda weird? sure. i won't deny that. but i know where the limit ends. i don't pry into his life. i just pay attention to what he gets tagged in and make assumptions. but if you find that weird, that's understandable.

[im-a-goddamn-cat]

some aces are sex-repulsed, some aren't. You are. i am ace and not. we get enough shit without you going around and acting as if your individual feelings speaks for all us and is shared experience. please start using the term sex repulsed for your anti sex rants

how the fuck is me talking about my own personal experiences on my own blog contributing to the shit asexuals get or claiming that everyone feels like me? i never claimed that every ace person is sex repulsed, i am talking about my own asexuality and how it affects me. i don't use that term about my own experience posts bc it's clunky and it's easier to just mention my asexuality bc that is why i'm sex repulsed. if i was making a general post about the community i could see how this point would make sense but again, i'm talking about MY OWN EXPERIENCES. also i'm ngl, i've never understood this push to make ppl say they're sex repulsed instead of saying they're asexual. like, for example, you don't see ppl pushing lesbians to say they're men-repulsed instead of saying they're lesbian in posts they make about how they're uncomfortable with seeing men in a romantic/sexual ways, so why the fuck are asexual ppl different? idk if that even makes sense but ugh. anyways, i've strugglef to acept this part of myself for a long time and i'm still struggling to. i don't appreciate someone who is also ace trying to tell me what i can/cannot talk about irt my feelings. i already feel like i'm annoying and stupid for talking about this stuff and getting this sort of ask from someone who should be understanding of this sort of thing just makes me feel awful. i am not "contributing" to the shit asexual ppl get just bc i'm talking about my own experiences. fuck off