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alo-piss-trancy · 5 years ago

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SD/R2 OMO HEADCANONS (Pt1)

Decided it was probably time for me to post a list of my omo hcs for this game since I did the THH chars! Like with the other list, I'll be excluding a couple I have no interest in thinking of omo content of (in this case, Hiy/oko and Teru/teru). I'm breaking this one into multiple posts throughout the week as I compile my thoughts (I'll add a link to all of them on the fic masterlist page later so you can find them all) because I feel this is gonna be a lot longer than my THH post haha!

Here we go, the first 3 (or 4) chars! Please stop reading now if you don't want spoilers for the game bc there will be several!!!

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Gun/dham:

* I firmly hc him as vegetarian (not vegan. He will consume byproducts like milk/cheese/eggs/etc, but only harvested himself or from small farms/sources that he has personally vetted/researched where he knows 100% that the creatures are treated ethically.)

* That's actually not omo-related besides milk oops but it relates to my next point, which is that for the most part he prefers Natural food/drink. Water, fruit or vegetable juices/smoothies, etc. He's not really used to strange 'Human' confections like soda or coffee, so the caffeine and diuretics hit him hard and fast and make it difficult for him to estimate how much time he has. It also makes him jittery/hyped as hell which Does Not Help.

* As long as he isn't screwed over by caffeine or a ton of drinks, he has a decently strong bladder and can hold for a long time. He has a lot of practice from hiding/waiting to help certain animals, laying trapped under sleeping cats/dogs, etc. And also avoiding public restrooms like the Plagues they are for most of the day...

* He's bladdershy AF and has been since early childhood. I saw he had signs drawn on the doors/curtain in his room during my playthrough (including the bathroom) and that is definitely his safezone. Can't go outside either bc 1. He's paranoid he'll be seen by other ppl and 2. That feels disrespectful to the nature deities despite the logic that animals do it all the time. He knows that's dumb and he hates himself for it.

* Sometimes I do like to ignore the bladdershy hc just for some variety. Even in that case tho he'd still be a bit of a diva about which public bathrooms he uses. If it's gross or weird he's gonna avoid it/complain/refuse to go even if bursting. He's stubborn af

* We all know he canonically goes commando. Therefore he is in extra danger because any leaks will go straight to his pants RIP Since he usually wears black it isn't that visable (as long as it's just a bit and not a full wetting), but if he ever has to wear smth else u know he's screwed c':

* He's not very vocal when desperate at all. Mostly strangled whines or grunts (only when alone or if so urgent he can't hide it), he's just so easily embarrassed that he can choke most sound.

* He can also hide his body language pretty well. He can manage to keep himself to rigid posture and the occasional shudder or fidget if needed. Only when he's beyond caught and about to wet will he resort to obvious grabs or dances in front of others.

* Even if he wet he wouldn't cry (I don't seem him crying much for anything tbh, barring extreme things like death). He's angry at himself and extremely ashamed. He would get red as a tomato, attempt to slink away and avoid any witnesses for several days. Could get snippy or hide in his shell all pitiful, depending on the person.

* When alone or sure he can't be caught, he'll fidget more once things are dire. Mostly his long-ass legs. Jiggling, crossing, bending at the knees or bouncing up and down, shuffling from foot-to-foot, everything. He doesn't really do much with his hands beyond a quick crotch-squeeze.

* He'd def let Haj/ime or So/nia dom tf out of him as far as making him hold/lose control, he's submissive and enjoys the challenging test of limits. However, I could also see him totally having a thing for 'marking' his partners during the times he doms.

So/nia:

* Lowkey has a bladder of steel tbh, tho you'd never expect it by looking at her. It takes a lot to get her desperate and even more for her to crack enough to show her needs to others.

* She had a lot of long lectures/lessons, meetings, social events, formal balls, etc. growing up, so she just got used to waiting a lot between breaks so as not to interrupt or be rude to her guests. This also makes her wicked good at remaining completely calm on the outside and keeping the quiver out of her tone even when she's absolutely dying.

* Even once people know her problem, she would NEVER grab herself or dance. Literally the most you'll get out of her is legs crossed at the ankles. For the most part the only sign of her desperation is the slight fullbody shivering where she has her muscles and posture strained. If you're very lucky she may wince or her voice will start shaking/get breathy (her breathing gets super fast and shallow when at her absolute limit. Like nearly hyperventilating fast).

* While not shy at all about asking/telling others where she's going, she was raised with manners. She refuses to interrupt while others are busy, and will wait until she feels the time is appropriate to but into convos or leave the room, even if that could take a long time. She will not skip out on a group task if she can help it bc she feels very strongly about doing her part and not coming off as a slacker (so group investigations/new island exploring/building for Us/ami in Island Mode are all LONG tasks she will force herself to stick out without complaint, even if she's about to wet herself).

* Despite being a princess, she definitely doesn't view anything as being 'beneath' her. If someone asks her to just go outside/in a sketchy place/strange receptacle, she'll do it without question as soon as they agree to glance away. In fact, sometimes it's actually a little thrilling.

* If she did wet herself she would certainly be embarrassed, maybe even teary-eyed depending on the situation/who was around. However, it certainly isn't the end of the world for her, and she would be able to brush it off fairly easily once she got cleaned up and had a chance to breathe. Could probably start making jokes about it by the next day, or just wait patiently for everyone to forget about it.

* Probably has a big piss kink (for others. She isn't much on doing holds herself, minus an occasional 'Damsel in Distress' type roleplay). And honestly just a big one for domming others (sometimes sweetly, sometimes cold/cruel like True Royalty). She looks cute but She Nasty (tm). Gun/dham and Haji/me (to a lesser extent, bc his smart-ass take-no-shit attitude makes him a bit of a brat sometimes lol) are her bitches.

M/ikan (I have to split hers in two bc I have polar opposite hcs) :

Non-Despair M/ikan -

* Is every bit as shy uwu ohnoooo~ as you'd imagine. Super blushy and fidgety and teary-eyed but never admits what's wrong even once it's obvious, to the point of potty-dancing in place (but she's Totally Fine she can hang in there and doesn't need to stop what she's doing)! You literally have to drag her away to the bathroom if u don't want her to have an accident. Would rather die than inconvenience anyone by telling them she has to go, will berate herself for the inconvenience when that backfires and she's made a mess of herself, 120% convinced everyone hates her and p much refuses any comfort bc she's so trapped in the spiral. Bawls her eyes out.

* If on a rare occasion she does work up the nerve to speak up and is denied, that's it. She will not dare ask again even if the person didn't realize how badly she had to go. Nope. Clearly her only option is to hold it until she can't anymore, or until she's alone and can run off by herself.

*Also she totally would whimper to herself in The Worst omo video star voice lmao "Oh noooo I'm leaking into my panties~, it's cOmIng OuTtttt~ uwu uwu uwu" (i'm not making fun of those istg but u know Exactly what 'sexy baby' voice I mean. That is Mi/kan. Don't be so fake bitch We Know u didn't fall spread eagle naturally)

* Says 'Potty' unironically. It's the only word she uses for the bathroom.

* Surprisingly not bladdershy at all. She's actually the opposite. Will go Anywhere (but will be embarrassed while doing it).

* She's used to holding a lot bc afraid to leave class/stuck helping patients for hours on end. However while she has a wicked high capacity and stays very hydrated, she has pretty shaky control. Leaks A LOT, be it in general or bc she gets startled/nervous. She's like a chihuahua lmao. She wears medical liners when on duty as a nurse or during school, but for general hangouts she forgoes them (totally bc she forgot and Not bc she wanted to show her wet panties off to strangers/peers when she falls again, that would be Slu/tty and Improper).

* Once held for ages and then ended up wetting herself just bc Hiy/oko told her to. It wasn't actually a request, just a one-off snippy comment that H forgot about like 10 min after she said it and walked away. When she found out Mi/kan took it seriously she absolutely lost it laughing for the next few days

*Her potty dances include lots of thighs rubbing together/hunching over, hands wandering dangerously close only to pause and grip her skirt/dress hem, hopping from leg to leg and shaking at the knees. She's pitiful when desperate and very cute. Pants and whimpers near constantly, nibbles at her knuckles to try and muffle it.

* Knows when she's at risk of actual damage from holding, but it's still a 50/50 shot of whether she'll break down and go or keep trying to hold. She knows it's unwise, but due to her complete lack of self worth she doesn't really care if her own body is damaged.

* That said, she monitors everyone else very closely and will harass them firmly to take breaks if they're at risk.

Despair/True Mik/an -

* MASSIVE PISS KI/NK. Loves to be dommed/told to hold until she wets. LOVES to do the same to others and tell them all the mean things for a change. She will borderline Break You.

* Takes great satisfaction in watching others struggle. If given an opportunity to make others desperate/prevent them from getting to a bathroom without revealing herself, she will definitely take it. She has no sympathy.

* The Queen of lacing things with diuretics, but can also often find that boring/too easy. A bit disdainful of that method tbh.

* Tying ppl down to hold or hooking them to IVs and 'misplacing' the call button is more her style.

* Used to hold for Jun/ko a lot to appease her. Would be willing to hold for Na/gito, but tbh he's just as willing to hold for her so it's a bit of a stalemate and they've yet to work out who does what.

* Will piss on her victim/lover while staring them directly in the eyes. Does not flinch. She toes the line between sexy and just plain creepy lol

#omocute #omorashi #fandomo #fictomo #bear txt #drspoilers

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girafflames · 4 years ago

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- i don't like tea unless it's either bubble/rose tea i love those and i like latte but i dont drink it often and dont rlly consume much caffeine

-Japanese because i've been wanting to be able to learn it for when i visit in thr future if i do, and i want to be able to sing jpop songs (i can only sing yorushika's Say It in Japanese perfectly and thats about it f) OR HOW ABOUT FRENCH BC IM LEARNING IT AND I STILL CANT SENTENCE JE DETESTE-

-Usually 6am for school but on a holiday j either wake up at 9 or 10am but i can wake up at 8 or 7 too

- Uh- i'll just..

•when i was 6 years old i loved watching house lf mouse, ducktales/darkwing duck/Resche rangers/taledpin on youtube/disney channel and Astroboy was also awesome

• i watched a bunch of Wander over yander when i was 8 i loved it

•Pokemon, Gundam, Voltes V, the OLD og voltron,that animal mini cars anime, pretty much a huge mecha phase when i was 10

•dUCKTALES WOO-OO

-Uh havent experienced winter since everyday is literally Summer in singapore. We have four seasons, summer,summer,LOTS OF RAIN,summer :'D

-i can be a mix of all but i'm usually optimistic (Awkward and kinda sad since a lot of my classmates are pessimists) and a realist

-Rain! I find drizzles/rain/dark cool weather calming and i can do my hobbies like art/reading/writing in serenity but that's just me.i like the sun but not that much since its too bright sometimes

-I use a leaf, a cut out drawing i made, or jusg my post it notes

- not sure if i had favourites but i do have some black converse sneakers as well as a grey one with blue and orange stripes on the bottom. I have some black leather heel (a smol short hell) boots and i like them too.

-Lavender, Chocolate cake, Candle smoke, muffins,latte or something like those. Apples too

- probably small, a white dragon with fluorescent scales reflectinv the purdy and red/gold/blue stripes as well!

- my handwriting's a mess and idk but it's a bit more on the cursive side!

-Blue or green

-I'm loud and confident for an ambivert and i'm creative and imaginitive

-I dont do any of those but maybe rollerskates!

-Only child! Wished for a sibling, a bro because i was lonely and i didnt want a too girly sib just in case 🤣

-I'm not sure but telekenisis? Since i can be lazy sometimes. But i would like me some ability to communicate with animals

- i look at my wardrobe and all i see is blue, too much cold colours when i'm more of a warm colour so LOL! BUT i do realise i have been wearing black/white lately and neutral colours. Just catch me wearing all blackwithout me realising (my ducksona's outfit has a lot of neutral black and white but hey at least i got a red cap and a blue hair ribbon for contrast 🤣🤣)

- WELL THIS IS HARD WHY NOT BOTH ❤

-Weapon of choice? Uh... *whils out guillotine* JKJK XD But i'd actually might like a sword or something but idk medieval weapons

-Best icecream flavour to me- i havent eaten a lot of icecream flavours but caramel/strawberry/vanilla- OH YUMMERS

-Default font? Well idk my fonts that well 😅

Tags: anyone! This was so long to do lmao

Asks that says a lot about you tag game! I was tagged by the amazing @harry-leroy, so thank you for that!

How do you take your tea/coffee? I don’t drink tea, but I drink a lot of coffee. I use a lot of sugar and creamer–preferably peppermint creamer (I’m a big fan of peppermint). I need it to be very sweet, so there’s a lot of creamer (very minty, too)

If you could be fluent in any language at the snap of your fingers, which one and why? I would go with Japanese. I always wanted to learn it, mostly so at some point I could go visit Japan. So it would be cool to be fluent in it

When do you wake up? I have an alarm set for 6am, so I can do my morning chores (let the dogs out, feed the dogs and cats their breakfast). I usually go back to sleep until around 10-11am, then I get up, but lately I’ve been staying up since 6, and I’ll have to start doing that for school which starts within a few days

What was your favourite tv show as a kid? I’m actually not sure. Gravity Falls, Teen Titans, to name a few, were ones that I really enjoyed (and still do). I can’t really name any that were my favorite, I just really enjoyed some of them. I also didn’t watch a lot of TV when I was younger; I mostly played video games

Summer or Winter? Winter, definitely. I’m not a fan of summer or heat in general, I prefer the cold and what winter usually has with it

Realist, optimist, or pessimist? I have to say I’m pessimistic and a little bit of a realist as well. I mean, now when I see things on the news or posts about what’s happening I’m usually now just like, “oh this is happening now :/ ”, but I mostly shift between realist and pessimist

Rain or sunshine? Rain. I really like watching and listening to the rain, it’s very nice and the cool air is very nice as well. It’s nice to listen to while I type

How do you mark your spot in a book? I usually use my bookmark or use a scrap of paper that I find

What are your favourite shoes like? I don’t really have any favorite shoes. I just have shoes that I wear, I don’t have favorites. But the ones I wear are purple with a zip tie on one of the shoe laces. It makes it very hard to tie it

What would your non-perfume/cologne signature scent be? My favorite is apple cider, cinnamon rolls, and other scents like that. Winter type scents as well

If you were a dragon, what would you look like? I’m not sure, lol. Probably something small and purple, I’m not sure

Is your handwriting more print, cursive, or a mix? More or a print. I’m not good at cursive, only for my signature.

What colour would your lightsaber be? If I remember correctly, each color represented something, but I could be wrong. So, I’m not too sure. Either blue or purple, maybe even green

What is your defining personality trait? Very shy, I won’t initiate conversations because I’m too nervous

Roller skates or rollerblades or ice skates? Roller skates. Rollerblades seem harder to deal with, and ice skates are also harder to deal with (for me, anyway)

Are you an only child? oldest / middle / youngest? I’m the middle child, with my brother being quite a few years older than me, with a younger sister–she’s the younger twin

What would your superpower be? how would you use it? I’m not sure, I’m never good that these sorts of questions. Shadow manipulation, maybe, I’ve always been a fan of shadow-type magic. Not sure how I would really use it though

What’s your clothing colour palette? Black, a lot of black, maybe some white and blue. But mostly black

Pet snake or pet bird? Neither. Don’t like birds, and I don’t think I would really want a pet snake

Weapon of choice in a medieval battle? Mace, but I could be biased since my clerics usually have one when I play D&D

The best ice cream flavour? Watermelon! I love watermelon flavored ice cream, it’s so good

Default font when typing? Arial, when I type my fics. But for school work, I use Times New Roman

Tagging: @infamousquack @gyro-gayloose16 @greatgamedota and anyone else who wants do it!

#long post #tag game #infamousquack

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realtalk-princeton · 6 years ago

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Before princeton i had BED- it started when I was 11-12ish and became uncontrollable in my last couple of years of school. Fortunately I’m pretty active and cycled pretty much daily so binging on 3000 calories at a time 2-3 times a week only made me borderline overweight at its worse. When I got to Princeton I found it harder to access my favorite binge food so my BED almost completely went, and I haven’t binged since November now. Having said that, since August 2017 I’ve lost 26lbs, partially

[cont.]Through trying to lose a bit last year but mostly from eating less this year. Since the weather started getting warmer though I’ve really lost all willingness to eat and can only force myself to go to max 2 small meals a day. My friends haven’t noticed but none of my clothes fit anymore. I’m worried both about going back home for summer because my family might notice (they last saw me in January) and also that my metabolism has slowed and now I’m too scared to eat more than 1000 calories a day[cont.] because its going to make me fatter and even after losing so much I’m still nowhere near having a flat stomach. I’m pretty sure I’ll be able to be fine with maintaining once I lose about another 5-10lbs but I know the amount I’m eating currently is unhealthy, so any advice for getting to my goal more healthily? I’m also scared im gonna start binging again in the summer

Response from Clipper:

Hey anon- I am so sorry you’re going through this. TL;DR: hang in there; you have the strength to overcome this and create healthier, lifelong patterns for yourself.

I currently suffer from mildly disordered eating which arose from going on my medications at college (not eating during the day, then bingeing late at night when my evening medications kick in). I used to also very strictly control my eating in high school before I was diagnosed with my various mental and bodily afflictions (gotta catch ‘em all, it seems) because it gave me warped a sense of control over my life.

I’m gonna give you some overall good feelings-type advice. Then, I’ve enlisted one of my best friends to give a longer answer, as they went through something more directly aligned with what you’ve described here. Here goes:

I know it sounds impossible to think of, but you can get a stranglehold on this sucker and pull yourself through to the other side. It unfortunately takes more work than continuing as you are now- and will involve you eating sometimes when you (or your body) don’t want to in order to get your metabolism up to shape again. But it’s important, and as I said up top: you have the strength to do it. Having a flat stomach is not a measure of health nor is it a good goal to have. A healthy resting stomach is typically not flat.

When I was in high school, to help myself eat enough throughout the day, I started a food diary. I would just list off the things I ate so that I could visually make sure I ate enough. Don’t use an app for this, as these tend to count calories- which is not what this exercise is for. It’s to help make sure you eat enough and to help you become accountable for your food cycles and habits.

Passing onto my friend now for more practical advice:

Congratulations on not bingeing since November!! That is a huge accomplishment. But you are overcompensating in the other direction by restricting and you will inevitably slip back into a binge-purge cycle if you continue to restrict your intake. TRUST ME. 1000 calories a day is nowhere near enough for anyone. Stop worrying about what might happen in the future and focus on being present and creating daily habits and practicing today. Take it one day at a time. Losing weight is addictive and it is difficult not to be seduced when you see yourself shrinking. This is the hardest part imo but you have to try to stop equating your self-worth with your weight and start appreciating your amazing body for all the miraculous things it does to keep you alive and healthy.

I suffered from anorexia and overexercising in high school. I lost weight rapidly but it was not about appearance; I didn’t have a choice but to do what I thought was “healthy”. I went into starvation mode from restricting calories and exercising too much; I never felt hungry and developed horrible stomach pains, dangerous electrolyte imbalances and kidney problems. I developed exercise bulimia once I started bingeing and exercising extra hard to “work off” the thousands of calories I’d consumed while bingeing. I had been eating so little that bingeing was my body’s last resort to try to keep me alive. When I came to Princeton is when it got really bad. When I would binge, my body kicked into its most primal mode of survival and I would completely dissociate and go into a fugue state and just eat everything in sight. I would steal food from my roommates and stores and even eat out of the trash. I was bingeing so frequently that I gained about 50 lbs in a few months. I finally sought help my freshman year here and found my wonderful therapist who I still see weekly. I went through IOP and day programs and spent two weeks in a residential facility but it wasn’t until taking a year off and really examining my life that I began to really overcome it. I still put too much emphasis on being skinny and my eating habits are still irregular, but I let myself eat whatever I want and have not counted calories in years. I also stopped exercising altogether and am trying to gradually reintroduce gentler forms like yoga and walking into my routine. I am at peace with where I am right now. The thought of gaining weight still scares me somewhat but it does not rule me like it used to and I know that if I gain a few pounds no one will notice but me and everyone will still love and care for me. Today I ate a whole pizza and sat in bed all day, which to most may not seem “healthy”, but compared to where I was a few short years ago, this is enormous growth for me. It is a constant process that takes daily practice and in June I will be graduating with two degrees: one AB and one ED.

Stop weighing yourself. Give or throw away your scale right now. Stop trying to lose weight and focus on being well. Make an appointment with a nutritionist (your dsl has referrals) and ask them to monitor your habits and do blind weigh-ins. Also make an appointment with a therapist and/or psychiatrist if you don’t have one. Prozac has been known to help with BED at certain doses so they might recommend you that. Make sure you’re eating three balanced meals a day; they can be small in size but make sure you have a good balance of protein, carbs, fats, and fruits/veggies. Never go more than 4 hours without eating something because that will cause your blood sugar to dip and will make you more likely to binge later. Make a daily schedule with evenly spaced meal times that are realistic work for you and make sure to add snacks so you’re not going too long without eating. If you have a roommate, tell them you’re watching what you eat (you don’t have to go into detail if you don’t want) and ask them to help you and keep food in your space limited or ask them to keep it in their room. Pay close attention to your hunger cues; notice what times of day you tend to be hungriest.

STOP. COUNTING. CALORIES. Caloric labels are inaccurate and you do not know exactly how much energy you’re expending each day and it’s all so arbitrary it doesn’t mean anything anyway. The internet is not always your friend. Stop looking up calorie counts of foods and block websites that could trigger you to obsess. Start trying to listen to what your body needs instead of intellectualizing what you think you should need. Continue moderate exercise and be aware that if you exercise more you may be hungrier and will definitely need to eat more. But intense exercise can also suppress appetite.Keep it to 30-40 mins of cardio 3-5 days a week, ALTERNATE with strength training days, with COMPLETE REST DAYS in between. If you feel restless on the days you don’t exercise, take a calm walk or try meditating or gentle stretching. And make sure you DO NOT BY ANY MEANS restrict your intake on the days you’re not exercising; rest days are when your muscles rebuild and they need food for that!Drink at least 64oz of water a day and more if you exercise and/or drink caffeine.

ALSO no one has a completely flat stomach and it fluctuates with your digestion and cycles anyway. If you feel bloated, try herbal teas like ginger and mint (really anything with ginger in it) but avoid “detox” or “flat belly” teas and supplements that contain laxatives because that is a slippery slope. Also avoid very salty snack foods that can make you retain water, avoid chewing too much gum which can make you swallow air and get belly bloat, and avoid anything with sugar substitutes like aspartame because those can also wreak havoc on your digestion. Eat full-calorie and full-fat versions of things, avoid “lite”, low-fat and sugar free snacks. Don’t drink too much caffeine either because it can have an appetite suppressant effect and make it harder for you to eat normally. ..You are young and your metabolism will recover as you begin to eat normally again and your weight will settle at a place that is right for you. Your pulse is probably slow and might you feel cold because you are not eating enough. You will NOT become overweight by eating regularly. Please trust the process; I know it feels impossible and it’s super triggering to have to eat when you don’t want to or you aren’t hungry but you have to start refeeding now or you may begin doing permanent damage to your body. It’s too much to do alone so seek the help of experts and listen to them. Stop fooling yourself. Take time off if you need and be honest with everyone but most importantly with yourself.

If it helps, make a list of things you like about yourself and your body and especially your heart and mind. Stop fixating on imperfections. If you have a lot of mirrors around, get rid of them. If your clothes don’t fit, get new clothes. You deserve to feel good and restricting/losing weight/bingeing/purging (exercise is a form of purging!!!) might be a temporary high but will not make you feel good in the long run. Stop making excuses. If you haven’t eaten three meals yet today, go get dinner as soon as you can. The best time to start is right now. Best of luck, you brave ED warrior.

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hotcocosharing · 7 years ago

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Second Chance Part 20 (IM RP)

OC- Midori Katayani ❣ Canon- Shunichiro Tachibana

❥ ❥ ❥ ❥ ❥ ❥ ❥ ❥ ❥ ❥ ❥ ❥ ❥

Shunichiro Tachibana

“Don��t do this,” I think to myself, “it won’t work.“

It keeps repeating in my head over and over which I ignore along with my logic and better judgement, and my heart leads me to the moment when I tighten my grip on Midi’s shoulder, hearing her every word, listening to her pounding heart.

I move to stroke her moist cheek. How does she manage to look this gorgeous at time like this? She never needs dress to impress, not with me anyway.

She could dress comfortably in blue jeans and a white halter with a black leather jacket- an outfit on the day we met or a casual maxi dress on our first date with plain stud earrings. She could drive with the windows down and she could arrive with wind-blown hair and I would still be captivated by her.

Maybe it is how deeply I care for her that terrifies me. Fate has carried her back into my life and the thought of sabotaging our special bond just scares me, perhaps I seriously don’t love her enough as I couldn’t quit my job or ease her insecurity.

"Don’t tell me you love me if you don’t really mean it. I’m sick of the l-word being thrown around as if it’s just disposable, as if I’m just disposable.”

Why would she think that? She’s not disposable and she’ll forever be irreplaceable in my heart but I bite my lips and decide enough talking for the night (morning), I’d only catch a few hours of sleep if I’m lucky so let’s not waste it.

A faint floral scent lingers my nose at how close we are, I replace my hand with a light kiss on the corner of her eye, slowly trailing down the tears to her dry lips. Delicately and ever so gently before my lips press against hers, making sure this is mutual and no one is hurt.

My stomach flutters a bit when she eventually kisses back, if this is a mistake that makes everything worse- at least we have made it together, nevertheless, this would change everything.

Midi purses her lips and looks hopefully at me before leading me to my bedroom, my bed and the sheets with one side that may or may not smell like Sachi.

Leaning my forehead against hers, my uneven breath warming her face, my fingers electric as they comb through her hair. Surrendering to the chemistry between us with reckless impulse, our lips seal again with our eyes close and tongues dancing in a heated fervor. With a bit of struggle and slight awkwardness, we manage to get each other naked- it’s been too long after all.

Midi finds the edge of the bed with her legs and falls backwards, pulling me down with her, breaking our kiss to share a giggle. Our eyes lock and fill with the urge to quell the flames of desire before it consumes us both.

I tenderly kiss her neck, igniting a magnetic vibration in her bones and she hums in approval, I hope. My lips caress the flesh of neck in a slow, upward pattern, invoking the same moan as I trace her jawline. My fingers sliding up her waist and her hips responded by bucking against mine.

Running my hands down her soft breasts before drawing myself in for another tender kiss, I lean into her, kissing her gently from her jaw, down to the juncture of her neck, then past her bellybutton. “Wait, I should use protection.” I whisper shakily, dreading the thought of having to part from her as if she’d change her mind or be gone in such short moment, maybe this isn’t real, maybe she isn’t mine to have.

Moment later, I kiss her again before moving up the bed to align my pelvis with hers, using my right hand to guide my member into place and begin penetrating her with a slow thrust. A gasp rolls from her lips, her breath hitches with each tender thrust. Our hips move in sync with our eyes close, reconnecting and savouring what we have missed for the past years.

I pull out and slam back in, faster and harder than I intend to- in some sort of way to release my anger for the day she’s left me, for weeks of hell, months of confusion then the years of emptiness. My muscles tense and as much as I like to resist the urge of letting go, I am close. Moment like this never lasts, I know that. Midi murmurs but her words are soon subdued by a high pitched moan as she lapses in a blissful flash. And I’m far too busy to ask what’s it that she says with my member throbbing and letting out a long sigh of satisfaction. I stay inside her for a minute before rolling onto the right side of the bed, Sachi’s side- at least Midi should sleep on my side, at least for a night. I should have changed the damn sheets!

We lay there for a moment, side by side, listening to the drumming of our hearts, trying to comprehend what would happened tomorrow? (in a few hours)

A small smile spreads across Midi’s lips but a weight sinks in my gut. Not because I regret this, or how complicated my situation is. (Well yes I am very guilty in that part) But because, deep down, I don’t think I deserve to be loved. Not by someone like Midori.

Pulling her into a warm embrace, she falls fast asleep while train of thoughts exhaust me to drift off. Sleep, I need sleep. For once, what I want and what I need are the same thing.

Midori Katayani

My eyes are heavy as they slowly open to welcome a morning sun blazing in through the bedroom windows that I’m not quite yet ready to greet and I whine quietly, shuffling around to get comfortable beneath sheets on a bed that aren’t familiar to me. Checking my watch I see that it’s a quarter past seven and a sigh escapes my lips – I’m frustrated at the fact my day has started early; a few more hours of shut eye right now would just be heavenly.

Shun’s warm breath against my neck is fickle with delight and I decide to take pleasure in watching his chest rise and sink slowly with every deep breath he takes while he’s still asleep before I run a hand through his hair to sweep it up and out of his eyes and decide that it’s time for a coffee – I need caffeine to kick in to me before reality has a chance.

Scooping up my shirt and underwear from the night before which have been tossed on opposite sides of the bedroom floor, I slip into them and tiptoe out of the bedroom towards the kitchen. Kettle’s still in the same spot - so are the mugs which live on the middle shelf which I purposely arranged there years ago so that I could reach them. It’s two teaspoons of coffee with a half teaspoon of sugar and while I’m waiting for the water to boil, it’s a scribble on the calendar which is hug up next to the fridge that catches my attention.

Airport – 2pm.

“Fuck”, I utter quietly beneath my breath and quickly do the math inside my head as I stop the kettle short of squealing and waking up the whole damn apartment complex. Two hours prior to take off is check in, an hour at least on top of that to get to the airport by cab if traffic isn’t heavy, he’ll need time to get ready – if it’s a business meeting that includes a shave also, breakfast, that awkward morning bicker we use to have if it’s still something we might accidently fall into. Ughh – and I have to be at the bar in a little under an hour and a half to meet and greet new staff starting training for the weekend.

It’s a quick mental challenge to prioritize what I should be doing in my head and the next thing I know without any second guessing or asking myself why; I’ve abandoned the coffee which I could be sipping on, have taken a quick shower and have found the shirt he usually likes to wear for these occasions (or at least one that looks like the shirt I remember him constantly wanting but never being able to find) it’s ironed and hung on the living room door as I get to work on breakfast – traditional Japanese which takes longer to make than I had anticipated, the apartment has started to be engulfed by the aroma of fresh salmon I managed to find at the back of the fridge that hasn’t been looked at.

Once breakfast is ready; it’s a quick phone call to a cab company for a last minute arrangement and then after this, I creep back into the bedroom and crawl on the bed, brushing my hair that’s still a little wet over one shoulder and pepper a dozen tiny kisses across Shun’s jaw and neck.

“Wake up…”, the whisper is quiet as I watch him toss and turn gently, still obviously tired. He reaches out to pat down the side of the bed I’d been sleeping on and there’s the tiniest look of distress on his face when it seems that he can’t find something. I’m hoping that it’s me that he’s thinking of.

“Shunichiro… babe… wake up”, my next attempt to coax him out of a sleepy state is met with a mumble and groan as I let my fingers dance up the centre of his bare chest, brush over his collarbones and then outline his bottom lip. I’m eventually addressed with drowsy eyes that hold the simplest sparkle to them which warms me up inside.

“What time is it?”

Really Shun? Not even a good morning?

“Half past eight”, I inform him and my hand is quick to push back against his chest as he starts to try and get up; a panic which I can already make out and see settling in, “It’s okay – relax. I have to leave to go to work otherwise I’m going to be late but breakfast is ready for you in the kitchen, I’ve ironed your shirt and a cab will be around just after 10 because I know you like to leave early just in case….”

We share a small smile which melts me on the inside like ice in summer and I can’t help but just want to fall back into his arms again and go to sleep. Moving away to separate the two of us; to make things easier on myself because I just know what I’m like and how much a single goodbye can hurt me – I rummage through a closet draw and find my favourite tee right where I left it.

I guess no other woman has worn it.

Slipping into it; it’s jeans on next then shoes for a highly unprofessional ‘meet the manager’ day at work which I’m about to endure. Talk about presentation.

“When do you get back from business? We could head out for dinner? I can pick you up from the airport – save you the cab ride if you’d like?”

I’ve got no idea where my phone or cigarettes are but right now they aren’t a priority; I’m late, and whilst I really, really, really want to do nothing more than call in sick and stay here all morning and chat unfortunately, I’m my own boss and that kind of attitude simply won’t do.

“I gotta run”, I add just frankly with a half smile. I don’t want to leave because it marks the end of our first night together but I know we’re both adults and can handle this. “You know Shunichiro – I never expected to fall for you nine years ago but I’m sure glad I did.”

With those words said, I quickly scuttle back over to the bed; give him a quick, light kiss and make a mad dash for the front door – careful to shut it gently behind me as I exit.

#shunichiro x oc #shunichiro tachibana #irresistible mistakes shunichiro #irresistible mistakes rp #irresitible mistakes #Irresistible mistakes #irresistible mistakes role play

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nrlrbhh · 6 years ago

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Been awhile ((for too many times))

aaaaaand im back hahahahaha. actually i have few posts saved in my drafts since ive been writing abt few stuffs but i stopped halfway since ive been busy for fyp presentation day and all so yeap im back, yea physically.

alhamdulillah, in these few weeks and months, so many things happened, so many decisions made, too much emotions felt. thummalhamdulillah, im done w fyp2 presentation eventho the device didn't work too well that it could satisfies my heart but still okay and acceptable, still my effort thus- im proud of myself haha! we also decided to go perform umrah Insya Allah ((praying hard!)) this december, or i could say almost a month from now. it has been our dream, weve been talking abt this wayyyy before election day but mama had to do what she gotta do so we pushed it back and alhamdulillah, got the date and we ((me n my sister)) have went to the kursus as well. next is, my sister and i ((again,)) did a very very extreme decision abt smthg that will be happening next year in march Insya Allah, we didn't tell anyone yet but trust me it doesn't include crime or what lol. can't wait!!!!!!

i just had to rant here that along the days i went thru before fyp2 presentation day, it was very very hard. i was attacked w anxiety most of the time. i cried too much, my heart beats too fast, i was very very sensitive especially within the whole week prior to the day, i consumed too much caffeine, too many panadols, my body went thru extra bad routines everyday. up to the d-day i would say, i can never gat any nervous than that. it went very bad until few hours before presentation ((that morning)) i realized myself beng super calm. im glad the assessor came quite late that morning since i got time to calm myself down. i saw my friends went thru the same things with me, and saw the smiles in their faces once everything was done. thummal hamdulillah.

i can't forget all the feelings i get while having to complete my tasks for fyp. it could be one of the best memories i guess??

things have been extra special to me these days. less than a month from now, we will be parting ways towards our own dreams, either to be engineers, or to do anything else that might were written better for us. some has already planning for their marriages, some has secured their internship and job positions, some still trying to managing their lives, and me? following whats in front of my eyes. these days, when i met my friends, i found myself looking at them fondly, i just had to capture everything using my eyes, and kept that well in my heart. four years may seem short but these people, these pure souls, taught me more than life ever offered. they taught me more than what i learned from schools. less than a month now, some may start to forget part of us, some may can still meet up. it makes me anxious that i actually will enter another phase of life as an adult, it makes me happy that i can actually take a break even just for a week, it makes me sad that things will not be repeating again. some might say that their highschool days were the best, their boarding schools were the best, their colleges were not, their universities were not. different places, i learned different things. and i was very very very grateful to be able to meet everyone here. dahlah sedih-

and alhamdulillah, i actually targeted to receive excellence achievers’ award during my first year but guess what? i got it in my third year haha! alhamdulillah, it was never my dream again after learning different kind of difficult subjects started from the third semester but to be able to achieve it in the sixth was great great enough for me. sadly, i can't attend the event since i’ll be having to attend clinical workshop on that day, but i’ll definitely claim it later.

thats all? oh and sufy will be having a baby brother/sister soon Insya Allah!!

kkkkk raklu geng bye

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asiacanvas22-blog · 7 years ago

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