#i also think Jack should get to kiss Crowley. i think they’d both be into it and it’d be funny. i think they should reference that they’ve

[quietwingsinthesky]

if there was a torchwood/spn crossover, jack would get shot in the head so much. i know he already dies a lot, but he’s going to die so many times during this crossover. keeps getting bullets unloaded into him. they stab him with silver and steel and copper and none of it keeps him down. he’s gonna get squirted with borax and that one’s not gonna kill him but it is going to ruin his coat, which is materially worse for him.

[petrichoravellichor]

Written for Day 19 of the Supernatural Deserved Better Creative Challenge (prompt: angels and demons).

Title: An Angel and a Demon Walk Into a Bar

Characters: Gabriel & Meg

Rating: T

Warnings: mild alcohol consumption (by angel/demon standards, at least; no one drinks enough to get drunk)

Summary: After escaping from the Empty, Gabriel wanders into a bar, where it turns out he’s not the only one back from the dead.

(Read on Ao3)

********************

Gabriel needed a drink.

A real one, not just something he could conjure up himself. It’d been a little under a week since he’d woken up in the middle of a field, dazed as all get-out and weaker than he’d ever been, but somehow alive. He’d done it. He’d actually gotten out of the Empty.

At first, Gabriel hadn’t known exactly how he’d managed it. He remembered dying—getting stabbed by an alternate version of your brother in a parallel universe wasn’t exactly a forgettable experience—and then he was waking up to some sort of explosion somewhere he’d quickly realized had to be the Empty, because hellooo, he was dead. There’d been a lot of commotion then, with Gabriel and literally thousands of other angels and demons clambering and fighting at once as a loud, pained voice screamed for them to BE QUIET, and the next thing he knew, he was lying face-down in a puddle of mud, alone except for a nearby cow. Gabriel had stumbled along until he’d found a small motel in the middle of nowhere, where he’d used what little power he could muster to charm a free room off the oblivious owner and then collapsed into bed the minute he’d locked the door behind him.

A few days later, he’d jolted awake when angel radio had all but exploded in his head. Word on the wire was that his nephew, Jack, had replaced Gabriel’s dad as Heaven’s new big kahuna, and apparently the entire world had been gone for a while but Gabriel had slept through it, and wait, Dean Winchester had finally pulled his head out of his repressed bisexual ass and was last seen kissing the shit out of Gabriel’s younger brother Castiel, who was also back from the Empty?! Whaaat???

Needless to say, it had been a lot to take in. Gabriel had spent the better part of the day listening intently and muttering “holy shit” as he caught himself up on all that had happened while he’d been out of the picture. When at last it seemed that there was no more new information, he’d dialed down the volume and decided that yeah, he was long overdue for a drink. He vaguely remembered seeing a bar on the other side of the motel parking lot, so he headed in that direction, opting to walk the short distance instead of flying—he was feeling much better after a few days of rest but still nowhere near full power, and there was no sense wasting energy.

As he drew near the bar, however, he noticed that although the lights were on and country music was drifting out into the night, the front window had been shattered; a few pieces of jagged glass were still hanging in place, but the rest was nothing but shining shards on the ground outside. Gabriel paused; then, feeling more curious than concerned, he crept up to the sill and peered inside.

The place looked pretty much like what Gabriel had been expecting, with bad lighting and wood-paneled walls and a couple of old pool tables off to one side. At first, he thought it was deserted; then he noticed a lone figure at the bar.

It was a demon, but not a particularly powerful-looking one. She was sitting on a barstool, a bottle of Jack in front of her and a glass in her hand as she gazed off into space, nursing her drink. Gabriel reached out with his mind, quickly scanning the premises for any potential friends the demon might have brought with her, but no, she was the only one of her kind anywhere in the area. If push came to shove, Gabriel had no doubts that even in his current state, he could still best her in combat; however, he hoped it wouldn’t come to that. After all, it had been a hell of a day in a hell of a week, and he’d come wanting a drink, not a fight. He headed over to the door and walked inside.

The demon must have sensed his presence, because she looked up the moment he crossed the threshold. Her eyes flashed black momentarily before snapping back to her vessel’s natural brown; however, when she addressed Gabriel, she sounded more annoyed than afraid. “If you’re here to kill me,” she said, fixing him with a glare, “at least let me finish my drink first.”

Gabriel arched a brow: she might not have been more than a run-of-the-mill black-eyed demon, but she had spunk; he’d give her that. “Simmer down, kiddo,” he drawled, “I’m not here to kill you, just looking for a drink.” He gestured toward the bar. “Mind if I join you?”

The demon raised a brow of her own, apparently surprised by his response, but eventually, she shrugged and turned back to her whiskey. “Knock yourself out.”

“Thanks.” Gabriel headed behind the counter, rummaging around until he found a clean glass; he plopped in two ice cubes and poured himself a drink. “Where’s the bartender, anyway?”

The demon waved dismissively in the direction of the restrooms. “Knocked out and tied up. He’ll be fine.”

“Mm, and the front window?”

“There was a biker gang when I first got here. They got handsy and didn’t want to leave.” She smiled darkly, adding, “That is, until I threw the biggest one out the window. They got the hell out pretty fast after that.”

Gabriel snorted. “Nice.”

“‘Nice’?” the demon repeated, then scoffed. “Thought you were an angel.”

Gabriel snapped his fingers, manifesting a stool on his side of the bar; he sat down across from her, drink in hand. “I am. So?”

“So, last I checked, your kind and my kind didn’t exactly see eye to eye on what constitutes nice.”

Gabriel shrugged. “I don’t see eye to eye with lots of people, especially not when they’re dicks. Sounds like the biker guys were, so yeah, nice. Besides,” he added, leaning forward with a conspiratorial smile, “I’ve done way worse.”

The demon regarded him, then smirked. “Nice.”

“So,” Gabriel said, taking a sip of his drink. “You got a name?”

“Meg. You?”

For a moment, Gabriel considered inventing an alias; after all, it was in his best interest to keep a low profile until he decided just how involved he wanted to be in this whole post-Dad Heaven business. Still, he wasn’t really in the mood for lying, and besides, he could always erase himself from Meg’s memory if he had second thoughts. “Gabriel.”

Meg narrowed her eyes. “As in the archangel?”

“Oh, so you’ve heard of me?” Gabriel said, flashing a grin; then, noting the wariness in Meg’s expression, he added, “Hey, I’m just here for a drink, remember? You’ve got nothing to worry about.”

“Easy for you to say: I can’t kill you just by thinking about it.”

Gabriel snorted. “No offense, kiddo, but if I wanted to kill you, I would’ve done it before I even walked in. Suffice to say, I’m not thinking about it.” Then, seeing that she was still eying him suspiciously, he lowered his drink and looked at her frankly. “Do you want me to leave?”

“Would you?”

“Sure. I’m not one to stay where I’m not wanted, and last I checked, whiskey bottles are pretty portable. Just say the words, and I’ll get out of that pretty blonde hair of yours.” He smirked, adding, “That is, unless you’d rather throw me out the window.”

Meg was silent for a moment, apparently weighing her options; eventually, however, she shook her head. “Whatever. Like you said, if you were gonna kill me, I’d already be dead. Wouldn’t be the first time.”

Gabriel cocked his head to the side. “What do you mean?”

"I mean that up until a few days ago, I’d been dead for years.”

Gabriel sat back on his stool. “No shit. You were there too?”

Meg gave him a confused look. “The hell do you mean?”

“In the Empty,” Gabriel clarified. “It’s where we go when we die. Whole bunch of black goo and eternal nothingness. That is, up till about a week ago, when the whole place went Chernobyl. Sound familiar?”

Slowly, Meg nodded. “Yeah. It does.”

“From what I’ve heard,” Gabriel continued, tapping his temple, “at least a couple of us got out, on your side and mine. Seems like the place stabilized eventually, though.”

“Any word on what caused it?”

Gabriel snorted; he reached for the whiskey and refilled both their glasses. “You ever hear of the Winchesters?”

********************

One hour and three-fourths of a bottle of whiskey later, and Gabriel had discovered that not only had Meg had close dealings with the Winchesters during the years leading up to her death, but she’d also apparently known his younger brother Castiel—and that, Gabriel gathered from the way Meg’s eyes softened when she asked about him, Castiel had been important to her, although she never explicitly said as much. Gabriel filled her in on everything she’d missed from the time Crowley had stabbed her up to the most recent updates he’d heard from angel radio, and by the time he was done, Meg was shaking her head in disbelief.

“Damn,” she said at last. “So, this Jack kid—Lucifer’s son—he’s the new God?”

“Yep.”

“Wow.”

“Tell me about it,” said Gabriel, swirling his drink. “Should be interesting, seeing as how he’s only three.”

“And Castiel.” Meg met Gabriel’s gaze. “He’s...with Dean now?”

“Yeah. Seems like it.”

Meg nodded, looking down at the bar. “Huh. And here I was thinking they’d just keep dancing around each other like a couple of idiots.” She let out a hollow sort of laugh and reached for the bottle of whiskey. “Serves me right for getting my hopes up.”

Gabriel studied her, the pieces clicking into place. “You had a thing for my brother.”

Meg’s jaw clenched, and she filled her glass all the way to the rim. “Not one I ever got to do much about,” she muttered, “thanks to Crowley.”

“I’m sorry,” said Gabriel, a little surprised by just how much he meant it.

Meg shrugged him off. “Yeah, well,” she replied, not meeting Gabriel’s gaze. “It’s not like it was ever gonna work out between us. He was always so caught up in whatever Dean was involved in, it wasn’t even funny. Besides, the hell would an angel want with a demon, anway.”

Gabriel found himself frowning; damn if there wasn’t a part of him that wanted to kick Castiel’s ass right about now. “For what it’s worth,” he said, leaning forward onto his forearms, “my brother never was the brightest bulb in the lamp; and regarding Dean, I once killed him over a hundred times just for kicks.”

That got Meg’s attention. “Really.”

“Yep, time loop, back before the whole Apocalypse thing went down. Took Sam forever to figure out what was going on and get them both out of it.” Gabriel smirked, adding, “And in the meantime, I got to play quirky death bingo with his older bro. Oh, and a few years later, I zapped them into TV Land for a bit. They looked like absolute idiots; it was fun.”

Meg looked at him for a moment, then scoffed and shook her head. “You’re really something, you know that?”

Gabriel shrugged. “Eh, I have my moments.”

And Meg, to his surprise, actually gave him a slight smile. “Apparently. So, feathers,” she said, raising her glass, “you going back to Heaven after this?”

Gabriel shook his head. “No way: too messy, and I’m not in the mood to help clean up. Figure I’ll keep lying low for a bit, then maybe see what things look like in a year or so. What about you? Hellward-bound?”

Meg scoffed. “Yeah, because I’m just dying to get stabbed the minute I walk in the door. No thanks. Thinking of just keeping to myself for now.”

Gabriel thought for a moment, then decided aw, the hell with it. “Need a place to stay?”

Meg shot him a look of what might have been amusement. “Why? You offering?”

“As a matter of fact, yes, yes I am." He nodded toward the front door. "I’ve got a good thing going on at that motel. If you want, I can set you up with a room while you figure out your next move.”

“What’s the catch?”

“No catch. All I ask in return is that you keep the fact I’m alive to your smoking little self, because like I said, I’m looking to keep a low profile. So, what do you say?” Gabriel raised his drink as though to toast. “Deal?”

Meg studied him for a moment, then smiled. “Deal,” she said, and clinked their glasses together.

[paradisecost]

Share a random sex fact about each of your muses. [ALL 5000 OF THEM lol]

me, opening up my muse list because despite literally editing it this morning to take off any inactive ones I CAN’T G-DDAMN REMEMBER ALL 27 OF THEM SDKFJNF. 

putting this under a cut because as you might imagine, it’s LONG.

Bla/ck Sa/ils Muses

Flint - Deeply dislikes 69′ing. He’s easily overwhelmed when it comes to sensory things and pleasure as it is, so the concept of trying to both suck someone off and be sucked off at the same time is just like… THAT SOUNDS HELLISH, ONE THING AT A TIME PLEASE. PLUS he likes to be… if not facing his partner, then at least facing the same fucking direction as them.

Silver - Doesn’t have as much of a libido as you might think, especially after he loses his leg - trauma tends to fuck that kind of thing up even when it’s not related to bodily autonomy shit. Postcanon Silver in particular is usually tremendously uninterested in sex, partly because of the lack of libido and partly because G-d forbid he ever form a connection with anyone ever again, even if he has Madi’s blessing to do so. 

Thomas - Just a big ol’ fuckin’ voyeur (though only if the other parties are aware and pleased that he’s watching). Like is he sexually attracted to women? No. Would he gladly watch Miranda fuck a lady and get turned on during it regardless? Absolutely. Same applies to male partners tbh. Thomas vc: LET ME WATCH TRUCK AND JAMES FUCKING, I’M BEGGING YOU.

Madi - Doesn’t particularly enjoy going down on people, regardless of gender; it makes her feel sort of suffocated and uncomfortable, and she’s not a fan of how it feels in general. She likes receiving oral, but will always be very clear with her partners that it’s not something she can reciprocate, and there’s no obligation for them to go down on her if they don’t want to. (One of her favourite things about Silver is that he’s always delighted to go down on her, and equally as delighted to have her hand on him afterwards rather than her mouth.)

Rackham - Tbh canon-verse Rackham is barely interested in sex (which… they don’t know is because GENDER DYSPHORIA but shh) but one thing they do enjoy is just. Tits tbh. They’d kiss and leave hickeys on a lady’s breasts all fucking night if she’d let them (Anne didn’t, because Anne generally preferred to be the one doing the touching - hence why Jack was so often tied up when they fucked, which they’re fine with bc G-D I FORGOT THEY’RE INTO THAT TOO).

Age of Sail OCs

Esther - She’s not a fan of any kind of restraint play, whether it’s giving or receiving. She doesn’t like D/s type things or anything similar and is very much vanilla in terms of her sexual preferences, and calling her by any kind of title would probably make her cackle with laughter. (She absolutely loves laughing and joking around during sex it’s her favourite.)

Morbés - Is often more interested in the build-up to sex than the act itself; he’d rather make out for hours and flirt and tease than anything else, though he does enjoy sex very much once he’s having it. Likes to have his hands tied, but only if it doesn’t require a key or some shit to free him.

Oisín - THIS MAN HAS NEVER FUCKED UHHH he’d probably be too scared to go down on anyone until they’d been together for a longass time. I feel like he sees it as this Big Scary Thing He Might Be Terrible At, and it puts him off even trying because he’s so fucking repressed and anxious in terms of sex and sexuality in general already.

Be/dlam Sta/cks Muses

Raphael - HE’S NEVER FUCKED!! THIS MAN IS A PRIEST!!! But ALSO he would love manhandling his partner (gently) and nonverbally teasing them when they start wriggling in protest when he doesn’t let them move or touch him yet kdsjsdkfjng. (And also: likes it when his partners control him by tugging on his hair, as long as it’s not too hard.)

Merrick - Come to think of it THIS MAN HAS NEVER FUCKED EITHER. Probably likes to murmur in his partner’s ear and hold them while they get themselves off. He’s very much a giver.

Modern OCs

Ace - This is the biggest trope in the fucking world but LISTEN his wings and back are hypersensitive and that’s just how it is. Touching his wings won’t just like turn him on in general, it has to be while he’s in a sexual situation, but gently tugging and manipulating them and rubbing at the base of them is The Good Shit. He also likes to have them pinned down, because it’s a little in the same erotic vein as having your arms pinned (since… wings are just fancy limbs lbr here).

Knotch - MONSTERFUCKER.

Lyall - Can and will manhandle her partners and just generally show off her strength a whole bunch. She likes to banter and joke around during sex and in most circumstances will get uncomfortable if someone takes it too seriously, unless she’s in like a steady relationship and knows the person properly etc.

Red - I refuse to believe this man knows what a fuck is NO I’M KIDDING OF COURSE HE DOES. Are you a monsterfucker if YOU’RE the monster???? Well, either way. ANYWAY. He absolutely doesn’t sleep with anyone he doesn’t know very well; not because he places a Higher Importance on sex, but because he doesn’t really like touching people he doesn’t know anyway, and he’s not interested enough in sex to really seek it out unless it’s like… a way of bonding with someone he trusts and cares about. 

Sax - Is sex-repulsed and just Does Not Fuck, ever. She gets extremely uncomfortable if people even bring it up around her and will straight-up snap if someone makes sexual insinutations about her in any way.

XMCU/MCU Muses

Charles - Very much more into receiving than giving, though that changes by necessity after his injury; he can’t really feel much down there anymore, so he generally takes pleasure by pleasing his partner and feeling it through their minds (with their consent).

Erik - Will almost never accept oral. Generally doesn’t really like receiving pleasure in general; he’s most often sex-repulsed, but when he does fuck, he generally wants to be pleasing his partner. It’s not uncommon for him to refuse to let them touch him at all, and he almost never removes any of his clothing.

Frank - You know those weird fucking growly sounds Frank makes in DDS2?? Yeah, he fucking makes those in bed too, often without even realising he’s doing it and very often if he’s in subspace.

HP Muses

Remus - Extremely self-conscious about his body and won’t generally remove his clothes. If there’s penetration involved, he prefers to be the one doing the penetration; he isn’t averse to receiving it, he just won’t really go for it unless his partner initiates it first.

Sirius - He WILL make you laugh at a stupid pun while you’re nutting. 

Sta/r Tre/k Muses

Bones - Has a weird thing for doing it outdoors as long as there’s nobody around. Local Georgia man wants to FUCK in a FIELD.

Jim - Compliment his body and he’s yours forever.

Spock - HAND FUCKING HAND FUCKING HAND FUCKING

Test Muses

Aziraphale - This angel FUCKS, because in this house we’re sick of “nonhuman beings are Too Superior to Care About Sex” tropes. He WILL let you ride his dick and call you all kinds of beautiful things the entire time.

Crowley - This demon ALSO FUCKS, albeit significantly less than his angelic counterpart. Has a Music To Fuck To playlist and there is not one single Queen song on it, no matter how much Aziraphale insists he should have Get Down Make Love on there.

Newt - The man is an ADHD/autistic mess and frequently gets distracted during making out or even in the middle of sex because his attention span is horrendous. He can only stay interested/focused for so long, folks.

Credence - I refuse to believe this man knows what a fuck is. If someone touched his dick he’d nut in like a minute because he’s never been touched in his LIFE.

THAT’S IT THAT’S ALL THE MUSES ARE YOU HAPPY.

[crashdevlin]

Hearts Entwined-6: Light

Hearts Entwined Masterlist

Author’s Note: This is the only unfinished series I will be releasing today but you’ll be getting all six chapters of what I have over the course of today.

Summary: y/n is a Wiccan from the French Mistake universe who finds herself in the Supernatural universe after finishing a spell. She’s not a fan, but she quickly sees the new place for what it is; a world with real magic. But real magic comes with real consequences.

Pairing(s): Sam x Reader, Dean x Reader, OMC x Reader

Word Count: 7326

Story Warnings: Smut, 18+ HERE BE SEX, DO NOT READ IF YOU’RE A YOUNG’UN!!, oral sex (fem and male receiving), vaginal sex, unprotected sex, rough sex, bloodplay, dub-con, sex curse, free-will fuckery. Angst.

Chapter Warnings: Angst, y/n’s backstory is full of sad, alternate universe shenanigans, mentions of drug use, fingering, oral (fem rec), unprotected sex, loving sex

"You're not Jack." Asmodeus across the throne room at you.

"No, I'm not." You answered, shortly.

"My lord, Asmodeus, I-" A demon walked into the throne room staring down at a clipboard.

"Can't you see we've got a guest, Percy? Show some respect." The Prince of Hell gestured at you and stood.

"He probably couldn't see me until you pointed me out. Low-level demons don't have perception like Princes of Hell do."

"Sir? Who's this?" The demon asked, looking at you with confusion.

"I don't, rightly, know, Percy. Let's find out."

You walked around him, surveying the room you'd only ever seen on your TV screen. "That'd be really threatening if I weren't a projection."

"And why are you projected here, miss?" Asmodeus asked, following you as you walked toward the throne.

"I -unno. I was sleeping and then something was calling me here." You walked around the back of the large, ornate wooden throne. "Are we in Needham? I really didn't expect you guys to keep using this set as a base of operations, especially with Crowley dead."

Asmodeus seemed surprised that you knew the location. "It's a good central location on Earth... and the last place the hunters would expect us to be."

You looked around the throne at him. "Well, Heaven is the last place they'd expect you to be, but okay." You ran through your mental map of the asylum and started walking away.

"Where are you-" The demon Percy started but Asmodeus just followed you as you walked through Needham Asylum, exploring. You stopped in front of two cells, one housing Castiel and one housing a depleted Lucifer. They both stood, moving to grab the bars and stare at you through them.

"Y/n, what are you doing here?" Cas asked as Asmodeus showed up behind you.

"Thanks for dropping my name, Cas. I was gonna Rumpelstiltskin this shit." You joked, avoiding looking at Lucifer, who was staring at you. "And I'm not really here. I'm projecting."

"I mean, this dimension. You fled back to your own world."

"A girl's allowed to change her mind, Cas. God gave us free will, didn't he?"

"You know this girl?" Asmodeus asked the angels.

"Never seen her before." Lucifer answered, but his tone, and how his eyes hadn't let your face since he saw you, told you he knew exactly who and what you were.

"She's a witch, caused significant chaos for Sam and Dean." Castiel said, obviously catching on that he shouldn't tell Asmodeus that you were a friend. "She comes from another world. After the chaos died down, she retreated back to her home world."

"And what dimension is it that you are from, Miss y/n?"

"Couldn't tell ya." You answered, truthfully. "Know where I'm going. Know where I've been, but I have no clue where I originated. I've got no memories from before I was with my fosters, but maybe I've been with them since before my brain was saving memories." You shrugged. "Who cares? I'm here now. Well, not here, but you know what I mean."

"So, were you one of Crowley's witches? That how you know of the asylum?" The demon asked. Lucifer seemed very interested in your answer, leaning ever-so-slightly closer.

"Crowley and his mother tried. I'm not interested in being controlled. I'm a free agent." You smiled. "Anyway, I really enjoyed our conversation, Colonel Sanders, but I wanna get back to my body so-"

"But why were you here in the first place, y/n? I was callin' to Jack and you showed up."

You smirked. "It's a simple matter of you being very loud in my astral environment." You looked from the cells to Asmodeus. "I'm sure if this Jack was in Kansas, he'd have heard you, too. The searching meditation thing... loud."

"Terribly sorry to disturb you, sweetheart. Have you seen Jack?"

"I met Jack Nicholson on a plane once, but I don't think that's who you're looking for."

"How astute." Asmodeus drawled.

"Thanks. I pride myself on my deductive reasoning capabilities." You chanced a look at Lucifer, catching a flash of pride on his face at your sass.

"I am looking for Jack, the Nephilim offspring of him." The demon pointed at Lucifer "You know, the most powerful being on Earth."

"Well, like Castiel said..." For some reason you couldn't place, the name came out the way Lucifer always said it, as two syllables instead of three. "I was off-world for a while. I don't know anything about a Nephilim."

"Oh, real-leh?"

"Not one that survived. Nephilim are abominations in the eyes of Heaven, right?" You gestured to Castiel. "Only because Heaven's afraid of their power, but that's a whole 'nother thing."

"For not knowin' anything about Nephilim, you sure do know a lot about how Heaven treats them." Asmodeus accused.

"I'm well-read. Also, you know, why else would Heaven have such a big problem with a little human-loving? God did say to love us, right?"

"I'm sure God wasn't thinkin' about sex when he passed down that decree." The demon said.

"I'm sure you don't know what God was thinking. You think God's too good to think about sex? Man was made in His image and men think about sex all the time. What do you know?"

"Can we not talk about my dad and sex, please?" Lucifer whined.

You chuckled but didn't look at him. You weren't sure if you were trying to keep Asmodeus from recognizing the connection between you and Lucifer, or if you were trying to deny it to Lucifer himself, but you were certain it'd be evident if you gave full attention to him. "Everyone has to confront the fact that their parents had sex at some point. I mean, it's a little different when your father is the Allfather, but whatever." You turned back to Asmodeus. "Anyway, keep your loud meditation to yourself and I won't bug you again."

"I'll do my best, witch."

You jerked as you came back to your body and Sam tightened his arm around your waist, in his sleep. Dean's hand on your hip pulled you closer to him, in response. "Guys." You whispered. They each grunted in their sleep, so you just teleported out of their grasp. That woke them.

"Hey." Sam greeted, sitting up and stretching.

"What's wrong?" Dean asked, zeroing in on your expression.

"Um... I have to... go save Castiel from Asmodeus."

"What?" Dean asked, sitting up, too.

You took a deep breath. "Asmodeus was searching for Jack, as he's wont to do, but he found me instead. I know I shouldn't have gone, but it was so loud and scratching at my brain and I... I astral projected to him and... he's got... he's got Castiel."

"Why would you go to him?" Sam asked as Dean's eyebrows scrunched together.

"Why'd you say 'Castiel' like that?"

You rolled your eyes. "I don't know. It just came out like that. Cas and Lucifer are with Asmodeus."

"What do you mean, Lucifer?" Dean asked, as Sam took on a look of panic. "He's in Apocalypse World, ain't he?"

"Not anymore. He's in a cell next to Cas. I'm gonna go get Cas."

"What cell is gonna hold Lucifer?" Sam asked.

"He seemed... less. You know, like Cas when he got his Grace yanked. I wish I hadn't missed the last few weeks' episodes."

"Wait, go where? Where's Asmodeus have him? And what the hell are you thinking? You can't go there. If Asmodeus gets you-" Dean stood, looking down at you.

"He won't. I'm stronger than him. And it's not like I can leave Cas locked up in Needham Asylum. I'll be in and out before Asmodeus even knows I'm there."

"They're at Needham?" Dean asked.

"Yeah. I guess Crowley started a trend. You know how much the demons hate staying in Hell where they belong." You shook your head. "It's fine. I can do this."

"We'll come with you." Sam offered, standing.

"No, you won't. Lucifer is there." You took Sam's hand in yours. "Lucifer, who's tortured and manipulated you, who's tried to end everything. You don't need to be there, or see him. I'll bring Cas back, okay?"

"Y/n, don't go without us." Dean almost begged.

"I promise that I'll be back so quick." You said, with a smile. You went to your tiptoes and wrapped your arms around Sam's neck, pulling him down for a kiss. You pulled away and repeated the motion with Dean before disappearing. You reappeared outside the asylum, at the bottom of the stone steps. You chuckled at the warding on the door and passed through to the other side. You slipped through the halls of the asylum and down to basement, touching each ward as you passed it and smiling as they burned away.

Cas and Lucifer jumped up when you walked in front of their cells. "Y/n, why are you here?" Castiel asked, as you put your hands on the lock and pulled the door open as soon as it clicked.

"Getting rid of all these anti-angel wards and getting you out of here." You answered. You moved to put your hand on Cas' shoulder and fly off with him, but Lucifer stopped you by grabbing your wrist.

"You can't leave me here, y/n." You looked down at Lucifer's hand, then up to his face. His eyes went red and you were certain yours went gold because he smiled, brightly. "You're my daughter. I could tell the moment I saw you. You cannot leave me to rot in this cell."

"I can, and I should." You answered.

"Y/n... you're-" Castiel started. You didn't let him finish his sentence, flying Castiel to the bunker, dropping him in the war room, and immediately flying back to the asylum.

"You came back." Lucifer whispered, happily.

"I can't leave you here. For some stupid reason." You broke the wards on Lucifer's cell and he stepped out, happily.

"I knew you wouldn't let me down." You grabbed his shoulder and flew off with him. He looked up at the building you flew him to. "What's-"

"I need breakfast and coffee before I deal with you. Based on your Graceless aura, I'm gonna assume you should eat something, too. Biggerson's. Have some pie." You pulled open the door and headed inside.

Lucifer followed. "I am not Graceless." He insisted.

"Just two?" The hostess asked. You nodded and she led you and Lucifer to a booth in the corner. "Ashley is your server, she'll be right with you. Can I get you started with some drinks?"

"Two coffees." You ordered.

"I don't want-"

"Shut up, Dad." You interrupted as the hostess walked away. "Coffee is like precious ambrosia. You'll thank me later."

"Oh." Lucifer pretended to get choked up. "You called me 'Dad'."

"No point in denying I'm the daughter of the Devil, is there? My parents back home hinted at it my whole life, but I just thought they hated me." You smiled at the hostess as she dropped two coffee mugs off and a bowl of creamer.

"So, tell me everything." Lucifer demanded, happily.

"Not much to tell. I'm another version of you's daughter. I was sent from whatever dimension I was born in to a dimension where there's no Heaven or Hell, where the version of you is an actor named Mark." Lucifer seemed scandalized by the thought. "I don't know why I was sent away. Maybe because Heaven didn't know how to kill an archangel Nephilim. Regular Nephilim are hard enough to get rid of, ask Cas."

Lucifer rolled his eyes and reached across the table. "Let's go ahead and get this out of the way." His hand grasped yours and the last thing you saw before you were pulled down into your memories was his red eyes.

And then you were looking up into his vessel's blue eyes, which were cast down on you, reverently.

"She's so beautiful, isn't she? So full of my Grace and her mother's human potential. In a few years time, she will be the most powerful being in the universe, maybe as strong as her grandfather." He looked up at whomever he was addressing. "Michael would twist her soul, like he did with the souls of his demon followers. He would use her against me. He would have no qualms twisting the humanity in her so that he could use her power as a weapon."

"Do we kill her now, then, General?" A familiar male voice asked.

"No, Zachariah." Lucifer looked down at you again. "I now know a father's love. I understand why Father wanted us to love the humans; because He loved them so. Despite their flaws and the damage they cause each other and all His other creations... He loves them... I can't destroy her."

"I could." Another voice, a deep baritone one, volunteered.

"No, Uriel. I haven't called you here for that. I need someone to take her away to safety."

"Safety. Where on Earth do you think she's going to be safe, Lucifer?" A familiar female voice chimed in.

"Nowhere... on this Earth, but there are other Earths and there's one where the fight with Michael will never happen. Heaven and Hell can't battle if there's no Heaven or Hell."

"No Heaven or Hell? How would such a place-" The female started again.

"They conduct themselves much as the humans here do, Castiel, because they have faith in what they cannot see, misplaced though it may be for them." Lucifer sighed. "I need a team to take her to the other dimension and watch over her."

"Whoever goes would be unable to fight in the battle." Castiel's voice went low, like she'd been offended by the thought of not getting to fight.

"And in the interest of complete disclosure... as this universe is the epitome of the mundane, I do not believe there is a way to come back."

"We'd be stuck?" Uriel asked, anger lacing his words.

"Yes. You would be stuck, forced to live as humans, unable to fight in the Apocalypse, completely cut off from Heaven's Grace... and I would be eternally grateful and in your debt for this service."

There was silence as Lucifer looked at the trio of angels before him. "Of course we'll do this for you, sir." Came Castiel's voice, finally. "And no debt will be necessary. We're happy to serve you."

Lucifer smiled. "No, you aren't happy about it, Castiel, but you might find it in you, eventually. Here. I will begin the spell to send you, you should get used to holding Orli."

Your vision was jostled as you were passed from Lucifer's arms to the waiting arms of a brunette woman with sharp blue eyes. Castiel, or as you'd always known her 'Mom', looked down at you with disdain. "This is terrible." She whispered as your 'father' came into view, looking down at you. "I am a soldier, not a-a nursemaid."

"We're being trusted with our leader's most precious-" Zachariah began.

"We're going to have to live as hairless apes, Zachariah. We will eat and sleep and age and die with them and it is all because our General decided he needed to feel the joy of Creation before taking down Michael. How is that fair?" Uriel almost growled.

"It's not Lucifer's job to make things fair for us, you maggot. This is an honor he could've asked anyone to carry out but he turned to us. Us, his most trusted. Take it as an honor, you dumbshits."

The trio stared down at you. "She isn't light. I'll not call her 'Orli'." Castiel finally whispered. "We'll call her 'y/n'."

You gasped as you pulled out of your memories, blinking rapidly.

"I was the good guy in your dimension?" Lucifer whispered, confused.

"Never do that to me again." You insisted, pulling your hand out of his grasp.

"Well, I'm sorry, but wasn't that easier than hearing you blather on about how you don't remember anything? Now you remember something! Your parents hated you because they had to give up their celestial identity to protect you."

"I'm just realizing that I never saw my parents being any kind of affectionate... and Castiel was my mom, which is... awkward." You sighed. "And it totally explains why they wouldn't go to church with me. They wouldn't want to hear you badmouthed so much."

The server walked up and took your orders, two cheeseburgers and fries, and walked away. "How did you end up a witch if you were raised by angels? I mean, not that you could call Castiel and Zachariah prime examples of angel, but..."

"I don't even know, now. I thought my grandma started me on it, but... I don't even know who that woman was."

"So, you're a witch, but you're Castiel's friend?" Lucifer picked up the coffee mug and sniffed at it before taking a tentative sip.

"It's complicated." You answered, watching with interest as he took another sip followed by a gulp.

"Complicated? I'm your father, but not your father. I'm evil but I'm also a savior. You're an angel and also a witch. You think I can't handle complicated?"

You raised an eyebrow. "Who are you a savior to?" You took a deep drink from your mug and set it down. "I am involved with the Winchesters so knowing Castiel, this Castiel, is unavoidable."

"Involved?" You could see the whine coming before he put his own mug on the table and slumped his shoulders. "Tell me you haven't allowed one of those birdbrained cretins to touch you."

"That's really none of your business, Dad."

"Oh, my Dad. Which one was it?" You avoided his gaze, knowing he could see the truth in your eyes if he caught them. He huffed out an angry breath and leaned back against the booth seat. "I honestly don't know which one would be worse. Sam, with his self-righteous bullshit or Dean, with his self-hatred and both of them, both of them, think they're so freaking special. Just, what, 'cause Dad wrote about 'em? Dad only wrote about them because-"

"Shut up." You demanded, looking across the table at him. He stopped his whining rant and looked at you. "Grandpa wrote about them because they're special, not the other way around. They are intelligent, handsome, brave and they have pushed through a million things that would have destroyed lesser men, including literal Hell for both of them. I'm blessed to have gotten either of their attention and fortunate enough to have gotten the love of both of them. You're the fuckin' Devil, you aren't gonna make me feel bad about my relationship status."

"You're with... both of them?" Lucifer asked, picking up his mug again.

"I said it's complicated, didn't I?"

"You know I hate them, right? And they hate me? Your boyfriends hate your father." He reiterated. "They want to send me back to the Cage."

"If you could handle being on Earth without trying to kill all humans and take everything over, maybe they wouldn't be so bent on sending you back to where God sent you."

"I wasn't trying to murder Dad's faves last year, was I? No, I was just trying to bask in some of the love and attention that I have been, historically, deprived. Then, here comes Castiel and Crowley, the little worm, to end my fun."

"This is when you were Rick Springfield, right?"

"Who? I was wearing Vince Vincente."

"I know. But you know, a single Jessie's Girl reference would've been amazing." You joked.

"What? Anyway..." Lucifer waved away the confusion and continued. "I was just having some fun. No big plan, no mass genocide, just a bit of-"

A phone started going off in your jacket pocket and when you pulled it out the screen said 'Sam'. "When did they plant this on me?" You whispered, answering it. "Hey, Sam."

"Where've you been? Cas has been back for almost half an hour and you're nowhere to be seen."

"Lucifer escaped." You lied. It flowed out so easily that it almost didn't feel like a lie when you said it. "I went back to put the enochian wards back up and he was gone. It's all my fault, Sam. I have to find him."

There was silence on the other end of the phone as Lucifer gave a proud look across the table at you. Sam cleared his throat. "It's not your fault, y/n. Lucifer, he's an opportunist. As soon as you broke those wards, he was probably thinking about how to get out of that cell. Why don't you come back? We'll regroup and look for him, together."

"Gimme an hour, Sammy. If I can't find him in an hour, I'll come back."

"Y/n, I don't think that's-"

"I just need to try to fix this myself first. Please."

"Okay. Call us if you get close. He might be powered down, but he's still Lucifer."

"Okay. Love ya. Bye." You quickly turned the GPS location option off on the phone and looked across at Lucifer, who had a positively giddy look on his face. "Don't give me that look."

"You just lied to your boyfriend about me. I've never felt so proud."

"I lied because if I told him, he and Dean'd pack into Baby and hunt us down. You might not be the Dad who felt the love of being a father over me, but you are still my father."

"And what's your endgame here, Orli?" He leaned forward. "You can't just let me leave here on my own, because you don't trust me. You can't tell Sam and Dean where we are because they'd never trust you again. We can't stay here forever and you don't want to come with me, so what's the plan?"

"No plan. You think I had a plan when I pulled you out of Needham? No. I just couldn't let my Dad rot in a cell because of some ambitious underling. That's it. Knowing all the pain you've caused, all the death and destruction... I looked in that cell and saw my dad. So, I am going to eat this burger..." You smiled as the waitress dropped off the plates and walked off. "...and I am going to come up with something, with or without your input. 'kay?"

"Look, why don't you just let me head out by myself? I'm not gonna do anything. I'm practically human." He picked up his burger and took a bite. "Look at me, I'm eating! Oh, wow! That is amazing. How disgusting." He took several more bites as you watched in amusement.

"If you think that's disgusting, wait 'til it comes out... and slow down if you don't wanna learn about vomit." You popped a fry in your mouth and leaned forward as he noticeably slowed in his eating. "You don't know how to do this, Dad. You need help. And if you think I find you any less dangerous because you've had your Grace yanked, then you must think I'm stupid."

"I dunno if 'stupid' is the right word." He swallowed and picked up his coffee. "'Uninformed', maybe? Of course I'm less dangerous. You think that ingrate, Asmodeus, would be breathing if I were full power?"

You rolled your eyes. "So you can't dust people with a snap of your fingers, anymore. So? You know how many humans murder each other every day? Not a drop of Grace between 'em. You're still dangerous."

"That's the nicest thing anyone's ever said to me."

"Eat your food." You demanded softly.

He didn't speak as he started eating again, slower this time. You dropped money on the table and walked out into the parking lot with him as soon as you were both done eating. "So, what's next, Orli?"

"I don't know how I feel about you calling me that." You said, grabbing his forearm.

"Why? It's your name." He insisted.

"Yeah, but-" You shook your head and flew him to the Bunker's War Room. Sam, Dean and Castiel all shifted into defensive stances as soon as they saw you. "Hey, guys."

"You found him?" Sam asked.

"He didn't escape." You responded, honestly.

Lucifer threw his hands up. "Oh, come on!" He groaned. "You couldn't keep a lie going for more than an hour?! Are you sure you're my daughter?"

"I can lie. I just prefer the truth." You answered.

"What do you mean, 'he didn't escape'?" Dean asked.

"I let him out. I couldn't leave him there with Asmodeus. I-I know that this could be seen as-as a betrayal, but-"

"'Could be'?" Lucifer chimed in.

"I took him to get something to eat. You can't tell this but he's... way depleted."

"It's true. He's very weak." Cas confirmed.

"I am not-"

"Shut up, Dad." You snapped, before turning back to Sam and Dean. "I'm so sorry. I just couldn't leave him there. I really just went to save Castiel, but there was my father in the next cell over, I couldn't leave him."

"Seriously, babe, it's pronounced 'Cass-tee-el'. Long 'E'." Dean corrected.

Lucifer's face screwed up in disgust. "Okay, ew, infantilizing pet name." He gagged. "And my daughter is just saying it like her daddy does."

"You callin' yourself 'daddy' is ew." Dean shot back.

"I'm saying it how it's said in my dimension." You defended.

"And why's it said that way in your dimension?" Lucifer prodded, pointing not-too-subtly at herself.

"Why don't you shut your stupid mouth before I shut it for you?" You growled. He put his hands up in a non-threatening gesture.

The anger flowed out of their faces. "You found out where you're from?"

"Not quite, but Lucifer helped me remember some."

"Get this! I'm the Michael in her universe!" Lucifer exclaimed.

"What does that mean?" Castiel asked.

"Means Chuck entrusted the Mark to Michael so he's the one who was tainted and rebelled. Lucifer's the obedient son where I'm from." You answered.

"Did you remember how you got to... Muggle world?" Dean asked.

"Cas took me." You went with the shortened version of his name to avoid name shame. "Cas, Zachariah and Uriel."

"Really?" Sam exclaimed.

"Oh, it gets better. Show 'em the picture." Lucifer directed, chuckling.

You knew exactly which picture he was referencing. You rolled your eyes and summoned your laptop, opening it and pulling up a picture you'd poached from your Facebook when you decided you weren't going back home. It was you and your parents at a park on July Fourth. "Anybody look familiar, Cas?" You set the laptop on the map table and turned it so that he could examine the picture.

"This is one of my old vessels... and one of Zachariah's."

"These are my parents, who I thought were my parents, anyway. They always treated me with disdain. Never understood why." You trailed off.

"Oh, they hated her!" Lucifer laughed. "So much so that they changed her name."

"What's that got to do with anything?" Dean asked, as Sam asked, "From what?"

"Well, I guess I'm a sentimental douche having never been influenced by the Mark, 'cause I named her 'Orli'." He moved to sit on the map table next to your laptop. "That's Hebrew, Winchesters. Means 'My Light'. Castiel didn't care that y/n was my light, hated that they were being sent away for Orli's safety, so they changed her name before I even finished sending them away."

"I'm very sorry, y/n." Castiel looked from the picture to your face.

"Wasn't you."

"I know the neglect and poor treatment you suffered, y/n. It was a version of me-"

"And another version of you was a smiley, Twitter-obsessed goofball who helped the homeless." You shook your head. "Adam Campbell really can't hold a candle to the light Virgil extinguished. Point is, you're no more Misha Collins than you are the woman who raised me and changed my name. Don't sweat it."

"Wow, she has a saint-like level of not letting shit get to her. I mean, human Castiel was an alcoholic pill popper who once overdosed on Vicodin and meth... at Orli's twelfth birthday party. To forgive that-" Lucifer mockingly whistled appreciatively. "Of course, Zachariah as a human spent 5 years of her life in prison for instigating a bar fight that ended with a cop in the hospital, so..."

You shook your head. "It really wasn't that bad. Zachariah never turned his temper on me."

"She's great. Isn't she great? That's my daughter. I'm getting emotional." Lucifer mocked being touched again.

"I should've left him at the asylum." You groaned.

Lucifer jumped off the table. "No, this is good! We're bonding! Where's your brother? He should be here for this!"

You blinked at him, not enthused. You knew where Jack was, you could feel him in his room. You knew he was listening to everything. "My brother will show himself when he's ready to face you. Until then..." You summoned the spell-etched manacles from the dungeon and slapped them onto Lucifer's wrists.

"Oh, come on!"

"You come on. I couldn't leave you with Asmodeus, but you were right when you said I don't trust you. None of us do."

"Here I was, thinking we were bonding." Lucifer bitched.

"Dungeon?" Dean asked.

"Dungeon." You and Sam confirmed.

"Let me show you to your accommodations." Dean grabbed the chain and pulled the archangel toward the dungeon. "Crowley rated us five stars."

You turned to Sam as soon Dean disappeared from view. "I really am... so sorry... that I lied, you know, when you called? I just didn't want you guys to jump in the Impala and rush to Biggerson's before I... you know, had my time with him. I needed... something from him. I don't know."

"I understand, y/n. You wanted to see him without us influencing the conversation." Sam brought his hands to rest on your neck, his thumbs resting against the curve of your jaw and fingertips caressing your hairline. His gorgeous hazel eyes looked down at you with adoration. "You know, Lucifer was right."

"That's a strange sentence." You whispered.

Sam chuckled as you blushed under his gaze. "Orli's a good name for you. You are so full of light."

"I don't know about-"

"Y/n, you saw Lucifer in a cell and you had to save him. Not because you needed him for anything, just because you couldn't leave him with Asmodeus. You are full of more light than Chuck."

"Thanks." You whispered, looking down.

"I'm surprised by your light... especially after... I didn't know about how you were raised. You never mentioned..."

You pulled away and avoided Castiel's gaze. "It's really not that big a deal. Your raising was much more screwed up than mine."

"No, come on, don't downplay your pain." Sam pleaded, sitting in one of the wooden chairs. "Tell me about your childhood, y/n."

You sat sideways on his lap, legs hanging over the arm of the chair, and looked up at him. "My mom was an addict. Got worse every year I was there. Like Lucifer said, she overdosed on crystal meth during my twelfth birthday party. Pretty much traumatized all of my friends, and I didn't really have very many to start with. I can't count the number of times I had to clean her up, turn her on her side so that she wouldn't choke on her vomit like Hendrix." You sighed. "It was the sleep issues that caused the most problems, I think. Meth caused her some terrible insomnia. She'd be up for days, then drink until she passed out. I thought that was normal for a while, until one of my teachers told me it wasn't, called DCF. That was the first of many times that we picked up and moved without notice, started over from scratch. I was 7.

Dad went to the state pen when I was nine, got out just in time to threaten my first boyfriend with bodily dismemberment. He never talked to me again. I tried everything I could think of to... make everything okay." You bit the inside of your bottom lip as you thought through years of just trying to survive life. Sam put one hand on your hip and the other rested on your thigh, which gave a gentle, encouraging squeeze. "I started slipping them healing potions when I started with the witchcraft. Mom was losing her hair and teeth, and Dad got Hepatitis in prison so I was trying to help them... just gave them more energy to hate me. When I graduated from my sixth high school, I moved out... stayed in the same apartment until I got here. I liked staying in one place... I liked that they could find me if they needed me."

You chuckled. "It's almost like I thought one day they'd wake up and realize that they loved me, come over and make amends, but... never happened. When I disappeared, they told the cops I must've run away because it's not like someone would've noticed me enough to want to kidnap or kill me."

Sam tucked a finger under your chin and prodded you to look at him. "They were blind if they didn't see your light."

"They gave up everything because of me. They had to stop being angels because of me. It's no wonder Zachariah had a violent temper and Castiel turned to drugs and alcohol. I have no idea what happened to Uriel, but I'm sure his reaction wasn't much better. I just wish they had told me I was..."

"Hey, that wasn't your fault. You were just a baby." Sam hugged you tight to his chest. "You know Dean practically raised me, right? Our dad was drunk, when he was around. But I always had someone. I always had Dean, even when I didn't want him. You... you didn't have anybody."

You wrapped your arms around him. "Well, I have the both of you now."

The first kiss was slow and sweet, an affirmation of your previous sentence, but it didn't take long for the kiss to deepen. Sam's hands tightened their hold on you as you twisted on his lap to better accommodate his searching tongue. You grabbed at his gray under-shirt and moved to straddle his lap. He groaned and grasped the back of your t-shirt, pulling it off over your head. "God... I did not get to really enjoy this view last time." Sam whispered, running his hand down your chest.

You leaned up and kissed him. You were ecstatic to be in his arms again. To be touching him, knowing that you were about to teleport to your room to make love, it still seemed a little surreal. It was surreal that you could teleport, and that you were a Nephilim, and that your father was Satan, and-

Really, everything about your life at the moment was the ridiculous antithesis of what you'd expected it to be.

You teleported to your bed, jumping up and pulling your clothes off while Sam got oriented with his new surroundings. He smiled as soon as his eyes fell on you. "Eager?"

"What, is that a bad thing?"

"Not necessarily." He pulled his plaid shirt and his undershirt off over his head and tossed them to the floor. "But you remember, last time you were a bit overeager and, uh, I barely got to taste you."

You smirked. "I remember it well. But I'm not under a sex hex anymore, so..." You trailed off, letting your eyes drift down his muscular chest. "Man. You are... unnaturally handsome." Sam smiled at you and reached forward, pulling you onto the bed. He rolled your bodies until he was on top of you, looking down at you through a curtain of his fluffy hair. "Oh, you look even better from this angle."

"You're the most beautiful woman I've ever seen, you know that?" He whispered, adoringly. You opened your mouth to disagree with him about how beautiful his exes had all been, Jessica especially, but immediately forgot to argue as his mouth attached to your neck and your mind focused on that. You could hear his pants unzipping as his hands massaged your hips and thighs. "Hey. None of that." He pulled back and shook his head at you as he pulled the zipper back up. "No Nephilim magic. We're taking this at my speed, not yours, Miss Impatient."

"Sorry. I didn't mean to." You promised.

"You're stronger here, y/n. You have to be careful about your focus." He whispered, leaning back down to kiss the tip of your nose.

"How am I supposed to focus in this situation, Sam?"

Sam smirked. "Well, that's your problem, isn't it? Now, just lay back and relax, let me do this how I wanted to last time."

You sighed and closed your eyes as Sam started to kiss his way down your body. He took his time, just like he did before, but you since you weren't dying from heat this time you were able to enjoy the slow build of desire between your legs. He seemed determined to make it last as long as possible, avoiding all the most common erogenous areas and pointedly keeping his hands to himself. "Sam." You whined. Your hands were twisted in your pillow, trying to find something to do.

"I will gag you." He mumbled against your navel, where he'd been swirling his tongue for what felt like an hour.

"But-"

His teeth came down on your hip, just hard enough to make you gasp. "Y/n, shut up."

"This is punishment for last time, isn't it? 'cause I Kilgrave'd you." You sat up slightly and looked down at him. He was between your legs, just where you wanted him to be, but he still had his jeans on and he had completely avoided putting that mouth where you wanted it.

"Is it so bad that I want to explore every bit of you?"

"Can you explore a sexier bit of me than my belly button, please?"

"You are no fun."

"I beg to differ, Sammy. I am a barrel of fuckin' fun."

"What do you have to do that's more important than what I'm doing with you?"

"Nothing." You groaned, throwing your head back on the pillow. "I know I'm not the only one this is torturing. You look like you're about to bust your zipper."

Sam chuckled. "You're adorable when you're frustrated." He whispered, before dropping one of his hands to lightly rub his fingers down your lips.

"Fuck, Sam."

"Finally." He finished your thought for you as his middle finger slipped inside of you.

"Gods, can I take your pants off now, please?" You asked as he started to fuck his finger in and out of you.

"Yeah, go ahead." Sam consented as he added another finger. "You're so fuckin' wet."

"You've been working to get me wet for forever, so-" You snapped your fingers and his pants were suddenly on the floor with his shirt.

"I'm not ready to fuck you, yet." He said before he started to circle around your clit. He licked and sucked at your womanhood for several minutes until he pulled back and got up onto his knees. "Wanted to taste you. Sorry." He licked at his fingers and gave a satisfied noise.

"You could've tasted me any time over the last hour, Sam."

"No fun." He reiterated, then kissed you. "But you definitely taste delicious."

You wrapped your legs around him and pulled him down to you. "You sure are spending a lot of time with me for being no fun."

"Lucky for you, I'm in love." He smirked, kissing you before reaching down and wrapping his right hand around his cock. He slid his cockhead between your lips and guided it to your entrance. He swiveled his hips as he sunk into you. "Fuck, y/n." He kissed your neck and shoulder as he worked to get himself completely sheathed in you. He was bigger than you remembered, or maybe it just seemed that way after months of sub-par sex with José. Sam's movements were sure and confident, as he always was with you, but José had always approached sex like he was afraid he'd hurt you with his 8 inches. You'd never had the heart to explain that the two men who touched you before him were both giants in comparison, or that he actually hurt you more with his careless hands than his cock. Fingernail maintenance is vital.

"Hey, y/n. Earth to y/n." Sam whispered in your ear. "You got that far-off look in your eyes."

"Sorry. Just trying to be quiet. Don't wanna force you to-" He rolled his eyes and pulled his hips back, immediately slamming them forward and causing you to cry out. "Fuck, Sam!"

"I don't want porn star noises, but if you don't make some noise I'll think you aren't enjoying yourself." He nuzzled into your neck as he started a quick piston of his hips, which you met every motion of, using the way your legs were wrapped around him as leverage.

You definitely enjoyed yourself. Through seven different positions and two hours of not even caring that the entire bunker could hear you evoking all of your favorite gods and titans, he managed to keep you just on the edge of cumming and at the peak of enjoying yourself. When he buried his cock as deep as he could from behind, left hand fisted in your hair as the other put blinding pressure on the bundle of nerves he'd all but ignored during the whole event, you finally tipped over the edge. You screamed in pleasure as your legs gave out and the two of you fell to your mattress, nerves tingling.

"Jesus, Sam." You panted out, exhausted. He pulled you against his chest, chuckling as his cock slowly softened within you. "What?" You asked, turning your head to look at him.

"Did you run out of Pagan deities? Time to call on Jesus?" He asked, amused.

"Oh." You started laughing. "Shut up."

A knock on your door made you twist and grab your sheet. "Cover up, Sammy. I'm comin' in." Dean called. Sam smirked as he wrapped the sheet around his waist and you reached down to grab his shirt from the gloor, which you put on but didn't button. Dean walked in, balancing three plates on his arms. "Thought you might need lunch. Protein and carbs to replenish." He handed you each a turkey and cheese sandwich with a small bag of chips, then sat down in the chair next to your bed and took a large bite of his own sandwich.

"You know, Lucifer must be way weak, 'cause he was raging like no one's business and nothin'. Not even a light bulb burst." Dean said around a mouthful of bread and meat.

"Oh, yeah. Probably should've mentioned that Lucifer knows I'm with both of you and is not happy about it."

"All the more reason to shake the rafters, sweetheart." Dean winked at you as you took a bite. "So, Cas, Jack and I were talkin' game plan for Apocalypse World and Cas thinks we should milk Lucifer for all the information he's got on this other universe before we head out."

You nodded. "I can do that."

"Yeah?" Sam asked, licking potato chip grease off of his fingers.

"He did it to me. Dredged up this old memory from the depths of my mind, something from when I was days old. I'm sure I could get at his memories from a couple weeks ago." You shrugged. "I could not if you'd rather interrogate him for it."

"Tempting as that sounds..." Dean cleared his throat. "Your way's cleaner."

You smiled. "We're gonna get your mom. Promise."

"We believe you." Sam said, smiling.

[everlarkficquestions]

Masterlist: Based On - Songs

This masterlist features fics based on or inspired by songs. Some fics have been named after songs. To simplify the masterlist, we listed the performers who sang the songs. We realize that some of the songs may be written by songwriters, and not the performers. All rights are reserved to the songwriters/performers who wrote the songs that inspired these fics.

Please make sure to read the tags and summary before diving into the fic. Some stories may feature subject matter which is not to everyone’s tastes.  In addition some of these fics may be incomplete and not updated in a while read at your own risk.

As with all masterlists, if you know of a fic that is not on this list, please, please let us know (by sending a fanmail or an ask HERE) and we will add it.  Please also let us know if you spot any inaccuracies.  Thank you!

Fics Inspired by Songs

Complete

Empty Gold - Pearl46Fever (“Empty Gold” by Halsey)

Fishing in the Dark: Part 1, Part 2, Part 3 - pookieh (“Fishing in the Dark” by Nitty Gritty Dirt Band)

Hello - peetabreadgirl (“Hello” by Adele)

In the Wee Small Hours - titania522 (“In the Wee, Small Hours” by Frank Sinatra)

Light A Fire - titania522 (“Light a Fire” by Rachel Taylor)

My Head is an Animal - LittleEvilIsa (“My Head is an Animal” by Of Monsters and Men)

Touch My Body - lupita86 (“Touch My Body” by Mariah Carey)

Miner's Daughter - PrincessGriffey (“Farmer's Daughter" by Rodney Atkins)

Once Upon a Pop Song - oywiththepeetaalready (Based on Taylor Swift’s album “1989”)

Whiskey lullaby - AngelsandTributes123 (“Whiskey Lullaby” by Brad Paisley)

Incomplete

Abeyant - ETNRL4L (“Something New - Axwell/\Ingrosso)

Fastest Girl in Town - SassyEverlarking (“Fastest Girl in Town” by Miranda Lambert)

Walks In the Meadow - mastersilurian (“Somewhere Only We Know” by Keane, and “Sweet Disposition” by The Temper Trap)

Arms - The-Girl-with-the-Books-323 (“Arms” by Christina Perri)

I'll look after you - beholdthestars (“Look After You” by The Fray)

Just a Kiss - Go Zips 28 (“Just a Kiss” by Lady Antebellum)

Seize Me - simplyabbey (“Famous” by Puddle of Mudd and "Shackled" by Vertical Horzion)

Slow Dancing - monpretenduevie (“Slow Dancing” by Lucero)

Speak Now - DistrictMockingjay (“Speak Now” by Taylor Swift)

Stay - Pearl46Fever (“Stay Stay Stay” by Taylor Swift)

Tangled Up In Blue - sunfishdunes (“Tangled Up in Blue” by Bob Dylan)

The Call - PM Addict (“The Call” by The Backstreet Boys)

You Found Me - Mrs. Peeta Mellark 74 (“You Found Me” by The Fray)

21 - BloodRedJam (Based off Adele’s album “21”)

One-Shots

A Drop In the Ocean - StarsCloudsHawkeye (“Drop in the Ocean” by Ron Pope)

Adventure of a Lifetime - lupita86 (“Adventure of a Lifetime” by Coldplay)

All American Girl - just-kiss-her-peeta (“All American Girl” by Carrie Underwood)

All I Ask - HPfanonezillion (“All I Ask” by Adele)

All I want for Christmas - crazydreamerforever (“All I Want for Christmas is You” sung by Mariah Carey)

All Over the Road - court81981 (“All Over the Road” by Easton Corbin)

Alone Again - Totally-Not-Addicted (“Alone Again” by Alyssa Reid)

Angels Fly - animallover0109 (“The A Team” by Ed Sheeran)

Answering Machine - domUNIQUE (“Austin” by Blake Shelton)

Because of You...I Am Afraid - ETNRL4L (“Because of You” by Kelly Clarkson)

Begin Again - sparksofarevolution (“Begin Again” by Taylor Swift)

Best I Ever Had - paradise_joshutch ("Best I Ever Had" by Gavin DeGraw)

Be Still - Lawi01 (“Be Still” and “Look After You” by The Fray)

Between Us (formerly The Cloth That Feels Like Love Itself) - titania522 (“She” by Charles Aznavour)

Both of Us - WritingForHugs (“Both of Us” by B.O.B. and Taylor Swift)

Bring Him Home - sparklydandelion (“Bring Me Home” from Les Miserables)

Cheers Darlin' - mirzimonstein (“Cheers Darlin’” by Damien Rice)

Dark Blue - optimus-pam (“Dark Blue” by Jack’s Mannequin)

Dark Side - Jamie Sommers (“Dark Side” by Kelly Clarkson)

Daylight - PM Addict (“Daylight” by Maroon 5)

Drunken Confessions - gobletgirl (“I Think I Want to Marry You” by Bruno Mars)

Ex to See - oywiththepeetaalready (“Ex to See” by Sam Hunt)

Fallin in Love at a Coffee Shop - jlala (“Falling in Love at a Coffee Shop” by Landon Pigg)

Fast Train - VanillaMostly (“Fast Train” by Solomon Burke)

Feel - Neverland014 ("Please Don't Say You Love Me" by Gabrielle Aplin)

First Train Home - it-was-always-read (“First Train Home” by Imogen Heap)

Flowers in the Window - amelinazenitram (AmelinaZenitram) (“Flowers in the Window” by Travis)

For the First Time - Nico-lovin-4ever (“For the First Time” by The Script)

Forever and Always - Fluffy the chicken (“Forever and Always” by Parachute)

Geeze, you're something to see - LizzieOktambe (“Home” by Edwin Sharpe and The Magnetic Zeros)

Get the Girl - sponsormusings (“How You Get the Girl” by Taylor Swift)

Girl on Fire - xNightLight13 (“Girl on Fire” by Arshad)

Going through the unimaginable - NurturingSilence (“It's quiet uptown” From Hamilton by Lynn-Manuel Miranda)

Goodbye, Gale - altogetherten (“Hello” by Adele)

Gravity - Jamie Sommers (“Gravity” by Sara Bareilles)

Groovy Kind of Love - titania522 (“Groovy Kind of Love” by Phil Collins)

Have Yourself A Merry Little Christmas - NotAnIslander (“Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas” by Hugh Martin and Ralph Blane)

Hello - honeylove90 (“Hello” by Adele)

Home - MajorGodComplex (“Arms” by Christina Perri)

Home Alone Tonight - ohmypeeta (“Home Alone Tonight” by Luke Bryan)

How Strange, Innocence - andthisisthewonder (“How Strange, Innocence by Explosions in the Sky)

I Can't Make You Love Me - bookgirl318 (“I Can’t Make You Love Me” by Bonnie Raitt/Bon Iver)

I better Speak Now! - chocolate-chip-cookie-monster (“Speak Now” by Taylor Swift)

I Don't Think My Heart Could Take Much More - TragedyIsTheKey (“3am” by Busted)

If I Die Young - pip117 (”If I Die Young” by The Band Perry)

I got the girl - pookieortega (“I Got the Boy” by Jenna Kramer)

I’ll Be - littleevilisa (“I’ll Be” by Edwin McCain)

I Wish You Would - jennagill (“Track 7” by Taylor Swift)

If You Don't Know Me By Now - titania522 (“If You Don’t Know Me By Now” by Simply Red)

If You're Reading This - chelzie (“If You’re Reading This” by Tim McGraw)

Innocence - Katannamionestorm (“Innocence” by Avril Lavigne)

Jueves - Janethonfire (“Jueves” by La Orega De Van Goh)

Just Another Student (He’s Not) - ohlovelyvampires (song by Melendi)

Kiss Me Again - sunflowerslyf (“You Shouldn't Kiss Me Like This” by Toby Keith) *

Last Goodbye - Abagail_Snow ("Last Goodbye" by Jeff Buckley)

Lay Me Down Tonight, Lay Me By Your Side - loveoverpride (“Lay Me Down” by Sam Smith)

Like Real People Do - PatronusDawn (“Like Real People Do” by Hozier)

Lines - swishywillow (“Antebellum” by Vienna Teng)

Long Distance Dedication - famousfremus (“Listen to Your Heart” by Roxette)

Make Me Feel - notanislander (“You Make Me Feel Like A Natural Woman” the Carole King classic sang by Aretha Franklin)

Make Our Gardens Grow - fairmellarky (From the opera “Candide”)

Midnight Confessions - famousfremus (“Midnight Confessions” by The Grass Roots)

Mine - A Battle Inside My Heart  (“Mine” by Taylor Swift)

Mine - just-kiss-her-peeta (“Mine” by Taylor Swift)

Missing You - javistg (”Missing You’ by Tina Turner)

Moments - This Tiny Miss Anna (“Moments” by One Direction)

More Than This - LiveLifeToIt'sFullest47 (“More Than This” by One Direction)

My Darling - shady66730 (“My Darling” by Eminem)

New Beginnings - professional9100 (”We Don’t Talk Anymore” by Charlie Puth) 

No One Ever Said It Would Be This Hard (The Scientist) - addictedtopeetamellark (“The Scientist” by Coldplay)

Nothing - The Other Everdeen Girl (“Nothing” by The Script)

Nothing at All - Commodus (“Without You” by Three Days Grace)

One Thing We’ve Got - passionately_curious (“Breakfast at Tiffany’s” by Deep Blue Something)

Ode to Sleep - joshs-left-earlobe (“Ode to Sleep” by Twenty One Pilots)

Ours - CaptainCaboose (“Ours” by Taylor Swift)

Partition - flythroughflames (“Partition” by Beyonce)

Piano Man - Girl With The Dandelion (“Piano Man” by Billy Joel)

Poison & Wine by spectacularmadness (“Poison & Wine” by The Civil Wars)

Prim’s Plan Part 2 - mega-aulover (”Thinking Out Loud” by Ed Sheeran) *

Quarters - atheredmind (“Classy Girls” by The Lumineers)

Question - Lawi01 (“Question” by The Old 97's)

Real - stacylk (”(You Make me Feel Like) A Natural Woman” by Aretha Franklin) 

Remind Me - pookieh (“Remind Me” by Brad Paisley and Carrie Underwood)

Reunion - ohalaskayoung (“Same Auld Lang Syne" by Dan Fogelberg)

Same Old Lang Syne - JLaLa *

Samson - colonellestrade (“Samson” by Regina Spektor)

Settle Down With Me - paceismyhero (“Kiss Me” by Ed Sheeran)

Should Have - Historywriter2007 (”When I Was Your Man” by Bruno Mars)

Sing - xpriordeen (“Sing” by Ed Sheeran)

Small Bump - liveinthemusic (“Small Bump” by Ed Sheeran)

Something - Peettamellarrk (PeettaMellarrk) (“Something” by The Beatles)

Speak Now - coalcompressedtopearls (“Speak Now” by Taylor Swift)

Sweetest Devotion - HPfanonezillion (“Sweetest Devotion” by Adele)

The Hardest Thing in This World is to Live in It - skittles12393 (“Who Am I Living For” by Katy Perry)

The one who got away - letthefirespread (“The One Who Got Away” by Katy Perry)

The One Who Takes You Home - titania522 (“One Last Time” by Ariana Grande)  

The Only Exception - javistg (’The Only Exception” by Paramore)

The Night Before - Historywriter2007 (”The Shape of You” by Ed Sheeran) *

Theif of Hearts Part 3 - mega-aulover ( “Say Something”, by Great Big World and Christina Aguilera) *

Their Whiskey Lullaby - BlackCat46 (“Whiskey Lullaby” by Brad Paisley)

These Days - chele20035 (“These Days” by Rascal Flats) 

They'd Loved Her First - ETNRL4L (“I Loved Her First” by Heartland)

This Goodbye - Winter'sFangirl (“This Goodbye” by Beth Crowley)

Tied Together With a Smile - XxYesterdayTodayTomorrowxX (“Tied Together With a Smile” by Taylor Swift)

Touch Love - setoutwithme (“Touch Love” by Yoon Mi Rae)

Troubled Waters - katnissdoesnotfollowback (”Bridge Over Troubled Waters” by Simon and Garfunkel)

Until the Morning Sun - Littleevilisa (“Love Again” by Pentatonix)

Untitled - mellarksloaves (“Learn My Lesson” by Daughtry)

Untitled - peetamellaark (“Have You Ever Seen the Rain” by Creedence Clearwater Revival)

Untitled - peetamellaark (“Sad Beautiful Tragic” by Taylor Swift)

Untitled - perksofbeingpeeta (“I Know Places” by Taylor Swift)

We Are Young - Jgem87 (“We Are Young” by Fun)

When the Darkness Comes - hinkeeverlark (“When the darkness comes” from Colbie Caillat)

Where Do Broken Hearts Go - titania522 (“Where Do Broken Hearts Go” by Whitney Houston)

Who You Are - Jessie J - empty inkwell (notoneforreality) (“Who You Are” by Jessie J.)

Wildest Dreams - AreWeInTheClearYetGOOD (“Wildest Dreams” by Taylor Swift)

With Tired Eyes, Tired Minds - andthisisthewonder (”With Tired Eyes, Tired Minds” by Explosions in the Sky)

You Are in Love - thegirlonpeetamellark (“You are in Love” by Taylor Swift)

You Are What You Are - Abagail_Snow (“Judie Blue Eyes” by Crosby, Stills & Nash)

You Belong With Me - stellaris demon (“You Belong With Me” by Taylor Swift)

You’ll Know - abbythebear (“Dreams” by Fleetwood Mac)

You Will Be Loved - JWhite0 (“She Will Be Loved” by Maroon 5)

Titles Named After Songs

Complete

Your Presence Lingers - HPfanonezillion (“My Immortal” by Evanescence)

Incomplete

A Wicked Game - itsmorgan (“Wicked Game” by Gemma Hayes)

Fascinating New Thing - flippedstargirl (“FNT” by Semisonic)

Heathens - ellembee (”Heathens” by Twentyone Pilots)

SORROWFUL ANGELS - MegaAuLover (”Sorrowful Angels” by Patty Loveless) 

The Match and the Rock - HPfanonezillion (“The Match and the Rock” by Bastille)

The Tigers Come at Night - shesasurvivor (starkist) ( “I Dreamed a Dream” from Les Miserables)

One-Shots

found the place to rest my head - loveleee (“Found the Place to Rest my Head” by Florence & the Machine)

I Just Come Here for the View - Diaphenia ("Your Body is a Weapon" by The Wombats)

Is it the look in your eyes, or is it this dancing juice? - grangered (“Marry You” by Bruno Mars)

I've come to talk with you again - shesasurvivor (starkist)  (”Sound of Silence” by Simon & Garfunkel)

Lost in My Thoughts - booksrockmyface (“Lost in My Thoughts” by Kelly Clarkson)

Miss Misery - Abagail_Snow (“Miss Misery” by Elliott Smith)

Radioactive - Arabeth_thea (”Radioactive” by Imagine Dragons)

Rain will Make the Flowers Grow -  shesasurvivor (starkist) (”A Little Fall of Rain” from Les Miserables)

Slumber On, Baby Dear - shesasurvivor (starkist) (”Slumber On, Baby Dear” an old US Civil War lullaby)

The Time of My Life - norberts_mom (“Time of My Life” by Bill Medley and Jennifer Warnes)

The Voyage Home - burkygirl (“The Water is Wide” Australian version of a Gaelic folk song)

When You Go Through The Valley - dracoisalooker76 (“Be Still” by The Fray)

Completed: 2/26/2017

Updated: 7/26/2018

*Added 7/26/2018

[torchscng]

Heavy In Your Arms

Location: 111 Arden, 6C Date: February 14th, 2017 Availability: @posthumanchaos

A transcript that should have been posted ages ago; here, have some Valentine’s fluff love in a bathtub.

Crowley hovered at the door to Magda's, fingers wrapped tightly around a bottle of Moët & Chandon Rosé Imperial. Running her tongue over her bottom lip, she inhaled quietly and lifted a hand to knock on her neighbor's door. The text conversation with the woman had left her wanting more but she wasn't quite sure how the evening was going to go. It was an understatement to say that Crowley didn't like to beat around the bush.

Magda had barely slept the night before, given Crowley the space she'd offered, but the running in circles her brain had done wouldn't be turned off, not even when she let loose clouds of smoke that should have gotten her high enough to eat stars. She wouldn't be surprised if Crowley had noticed the smell out the window well into the night, insomniac as she'd been. All that aside, she knew how to primp and preen, so that when Crowley knocked, Magda looked as amazing as if she'd bathed in the blood of virgins, a tentative smile on her face. "Hey," she said softly to allow her in, not sure what else to say just yet, fighting the urge to touch her but also tortured with not knowing if that was indecent.

Crowley was far past wolf whistling every time that she saw Magda - seeing her dance had taken all of that from her. Still, she was beautiful. More breathtaking than the scent of marijuana in the air. Her lips curved into a reproving grin, clicking her tongue in disapproval. "Lighting up without me? Simply rude." In comparison to her, Crowley was sporting the usual ripped jeans and loose white t-shirt. Still, she was oddly not intimidated by Magda's looks in comparison to hers. They were as different as the sun and moon, but perhaps that is what made it so intoxicating for Crowley?

Magda shook her head; "It was from last night," she amended as she ushered Crowley in and closed the door behind her. She didn't want the other girl to think she was high now—this was too—much—to be unclear about. Taking the champagne from Crowley, she hesitantly kissed her on the cheek before leading her to the master bath. To be fair, there was no non-master bath, only the one, what she gave up in kitchen she'd gained in tub space and that was fine by her. Putting the champagne in the sink filled with ice, next to it was a pop-up table with a massage bar and strawberries, a flute glass and a rocks glass, and Jack green label. The bath was run, it smelled of rose oil and had bubbled, and Magda dropped the silk robe she'd been wearing.

Crowley wandered after Magda, eyes dropping down to sway of the woman's hips. Pressing her tongue against the roof of her mouth, she followed her into the bathroom and couldn't help but gaze at the extravagance of her bathroom. Crowley wasn't one for baths, she preferred to stand as the water rained down on the scars and marks of her body. She found that baths couldn't get the knots out of her shoulders as well. Crowley eyed the Jack green label, itching to go to the bottle first but then Magda dropped her robe and Crowley's eyes were drawn to her body again. It wasn't anything she hadn't seen but life and warmth radiated from Magda. She followed suit in pulling off her clothes, dropping her white t-shirt on the ground and her jeans soon followed. Black lace in the form of her bra and under soon topped the pillow before Crowley pulled the hair tie from her hair, dark curls spilling over her shoulders.

Magda's hands instinctively went to Crowley's hips, drinking in the sight of her, the dark curls against the pale skin, a contrast that was almost uncomfortable but wound up beautiful, the kind of divine terror of beauty that things had who had lived. She liked that Crowley lived, was as dedicated to living—even after death—as Magda had been for so long. The sharpness of her torso drew Magda in, so she was kissing the lines of them and then actually had to physically step back. They had too many unanswered questions. Magda gave Crowley a view of her back as she popped the champagne and opened the bottle, pouring a portion for each. She offered Crowley a glass before settling into the porcelain tub, eyes vibrant and humming for last evening's thoughts.

Crowley wasn't ashamed of her body. She was all sharp angles instead of curves, the definition of heroin chic, with scars littered over her body. All proof that she had survived in a world like hers. Crowley didn't shy away from people and she was more comfortable naked than most but she couldn't help but tense when Magda kissed the lines of her torso, perfectly still in response to the redhead's gentle touches. Magda managed to steal the breath of someone already dead. As she drew back, Crowley moved to pick up the flute, the shadows of her winged tattoo almost shifting in the light.  She joined Magda in the tub but settled into the opposite side, green eyes fixed on amber ones.

After a swig of champagne and a shaky breath, she grasped the edge of the porcelain with her free hand to steady her nerves, and broke the silence that their chemistry created. "So... you had the night," she started, her eyes dropping from the intensity of their locked gaze, studying the bubbles instead, the patterns they made, to soothe herself. "What exactly makes you think you would put me in more, and not less, danger?"

Crowley lifted a hand from the water, dragging her finger tips across the surface to create ripples. One simple touch and the entire water was disturbed. She pressed her tongue against one of her canines before speaking. "You're the prophet, Mags. It's its own death sentence. Meanwhile, I run in circles with demons like Belial and Satan and you've been in contact with both. You don't think either will fuck with you more just to fuck with me?" She leaned back. "Yeah, I'm an unranking demon but for how long? It's the rapture, we all have opportunities."

Magda chortled in the bath tub, the sort of laugh that had the champagne bubbles buzzing through her nose. "Fuck with ME to fuck with YOU? Somehow, I think it's more likely the inverse." She moved her eyes to the ceiling, studying the tile, the cracks at the edges, thinking that nothing in this life is easy or perfect—or any other life for that matter. "It is its own death sentence." She continued to avoid Crowley's eyes. "I'm the one who predicted Revelation, so I know." That's something she hadn't told anyone outside the Nephilim. It had been her prophecy, but she'd been a woman—so, it belonged to John instead. "I like the Sinners. I don't mind demons. Belial's never touched me, I have severe issues with the one. And like you said—there are opportunities. If you rose in rank, you'd be equals—less able to be fucked with and..." she paused slowly, "better able to protect me, not worse off."

"How condescending you can be, Magda but you're not wrong. No doubt they'd fuck with me to fuck with you." Crowley commented, lifting the flute to her lips. She sipped the champagne and let Magda speak, waiting patiently for her to continue. In truth, it rankled her how Magda spoke to her at times but Crowley often ignored that feeling. It made sense that she had predicted Revelation and it also made sense how that could have weighed down on Magda. "Us demons are not the protect type that the angels are. Even Raziel and Shibah gotta look out for themselves sometimes. The others don't give a damn about hurting me or treasured ones. You think there's a reason I don't got a cat? God knows Satan would skin it alive." As for Abaddon...well... "The keyword is 'if'. If I rise, hell yeah, we can get a demon prince condo but if I failed, then what? I fail and I get punished. I can deal with physical pain. I can deal with it well." Her mind threatened to travel back but she forced it to the present. "Emotional pain doesn't heal as easily, which I'm sure you know."

Magda's brows furrowed and she frowned, eyes flicking to Crowley's and meeting again for the first time in this part of their conversation. "I don't mean to be condescending, I'm sorry. I'm—still trying to regain my footing. But you make me feel more like my old self than anything does. I don't know what to do with this hole I don't know how to fill. I haven't felt like that since I was a child, and I gave myself that back. I don't know how to give myself this." She waved her hand, dismissive of her vulnerability. "Doesn't matter now." Magda tilted her head, gaze intent. "'You demons'—as if you're all the same, when we both know that's not the case. Like angels, you are what you make yourselves—probably better at it, honestly." A pause. "Babylon has those she protects. I think you have a soft spot for some people, too. I think it could be in you, if you wanted it to be." If there was a reason enough—but was Mags that reason? "But anyway, this isn't about protection. I don't need that from you, I was just saying I don't think —us—puts us in any more danger. If you want an us." Her eyes burned brightly, wanting the short-stop reality Crowley gave, wanting the real feeling of her, not the facade but the unadulterated soul that she was, and she couldn't tear her eyes away. "It doesn't, but if the world is ending, I'd rather end it with you. I haven't—you're—" she looked away, finally, flustered. A poet at a loss for words. "It's worth it to me, if I'm worth it to you. But I can't halfass it. I can't live another part of my life like a shadowy half-life, not fully here, not fully gone. I don't know if—" if she could handle it? if she wanted to handle it? if she wanted anything like that? God, how did they get here, from just asking to spend Valentine's Day night. But Magda would rather know, would rather figure out just how many eggs to put in this basket.

It was Crowley's turn to look away, toward the entrance and away from the tragic figure sitting across from her in the bathtub. Don't count on me to fill that hole, Red. Magda had far too many expectations of Crowley but it didn't spook the demon, it only made her chest ache for when Magda realized how misplaced her faith was. She reached out from the bathtub and set the flute down on the pop-up table, shifting through the water - with great difficulty and no poise - to place both of her pale hands on Magda's cheeks, cupping the soft skin. Seriousness didn't suit Crowley but she wanted to be sure when it came to Magda. "I want you, Red. I'm not a coward and I'm no stranger to pain. Abaddon, Satan, Belial, I can handle them." She'd slit their throats with her grail if need be. If the situation called for it. "I will give you all you ask and all and you desire of me and want the same in turn but can you be with a demon, Magda? I'm not human anymore. I do bad things and continue to do bad things and I will not lie to you about them. I can't lie about who or what I am just like you can't lie about who or what you are. If you're okay with that, then I'm okay with anything else. I can deal with the demons and the angels. Lord knows your pitbull Russian angel won't let anything else happen to you." She paused but kept her gaze on Magda's. "Whatever Lucifer asks of me though, I need to see it through. If he asks anything at all." She doubted he would but she wouldn't let Magda go forward without knowing.

Magda didn't know what to expect, but she didn't expect the tenderness shown her, the crossing of the tub and the hands on her face, softened by the water but still vaguely rough and calloused from guitar and any number of things, the gesture comforting. The touches Magda had received had all been so rough recently—wanted and unwanted both. Tenderness seemed something they reserved for... something deeper, and Magda blinked slowly, letting the droplets of water make rivulets on her face, feeling their softness, and wondered if this was deeper. "I want you too, Crow," Magda said softly. "I don't want a different version of you. If you don't lie to me, don't betray me, and just love me—in time—that's all I can ask." She nodded, understanding—not fully, but enough—about Lucifer. When there was a God, she'd be beholden to him almost the same. At least half of her had free will. "And we'll—we'll just see? Nothing's stone, and stone can shatter. This isn't a back out, or a halfass. This is room to breathe. So I don't—" she bit her lip. "So I don't weigh you down too much. So heavy in your arms," she quoted, only half joking.

"You're light as air, Mags." Crowley murmured back, tone gentle as she leaned froward to place a soft kiss on her forehead. She knew Magda was trying to joke, to lighten the mood but Crowley was dead serious as she spoke. Being with Magda wasn't difficult for it, it didn't weigh her down or make her exstential, it soothed her. It both calmed the hurricane and fed her desire for chaos. "I won't lie or betray you. One thing I'm good at is being honest with who I am." She had never been so sure of herself. Becoming a demon had solidified her identity. "I'm more than okay with you being my girlfriend. Not a back out, or a half's but it's there if that's what you feel like being called. Or you can be called my superb lady friend, whatever you wanna call it." She teased.

Magda's eyes fluttered closed to fully feel the sensation of the kiss on her forehead, the light pressure warm against the cooling water, sending a little shiver down her spine as she smiled. When she opened her eyes again, she reached for Crowley, her hand grazing the side of the demon's face, touching where her cheekbone ran beneath her eye, tracing her jawline with affection and depth of seeing. She appreciated the sentence—the sentiment—but just hoped their hopes would be enough. Magda maintained it was worth trying before dying. She seemed to get on better with most divine than she did humans—what would come, would come. "I love that about you," Magda said, soft as a water ripple. Crowley was upfront, upshot—she loved the reality of her. At the end, Magda laughed: "What if I want to be your girlfriend, but also your superb lady friend?" Magda had remained perfectly still when Crowley had kissed her forehead so the demon returned the favor, staying relaxed and calm as Magda's touch trailed along the side of her face, her skin heating up wherever Magda dragged her fingertip. Still, she couldn't help the grin that split her face as Magda spoke, looking a little sheepish. "Yeah, well, I found out that it was easier to be real when I was human and it only carried over into hell." Of course, it wasn't to say that Crowley didn't keep a few things close to her chest but for the most part, she was what she appeared to be - a fun-loving, violence-seeking demon with a penchant for destruction and chaos. "I mean, they're not mutually exclusive, I'm down for you being both." "Of course," Magda replied with a laugh, thinking of the chain of events. "Naturally you would be chosen, given that outlook," the Prophet teased, in truth, knowing nothing of Lucifer's intentions nor selection process, but if it had been her, of course she would have chosen Crowley—but Magda was biased. It was hard to touch Crowley's face so gently and not touch more. "Both is always better," she said, and then, still lost in the softness and the restraint, quoted Winterson, "'To kiss well one must kiss solely. No groping hands or stammering hearts. The lips and the lips alone are the pleasure. Passion is sweeter split strand by strand.'" Then Magda's hand dropped, almost sheepishly, and she blushed. In truth, Crowley wasn't exatly sure why she was chosen. She'd never asked and he had never really explained. Out of all the people in the world, he had chosen a junkie who had walked into an early grave. She could understand his turning of Babylon. Look what she had become - Mother of Prostitutes and Abombinations. Then again, she had a few years on Crowley but still, she wondered on those rare nights she dared to become introspective. Presently, she peered at Magda, green gaze fixed on that entrancing face as Magda quoted someone that Crowley probably never would have heard of. Crowley caught Magda's dropped hand and gently placed it back on her face, nodding in approval. "If anyone's voice has to bring on the rapture, I'm glad it's yours."

[appleschloss]

HAPPY 10K MANDY

My friend, @princesscas just hit 10k followers recently and I’m soooo proud of her and I wanted to make something but I didn’t even know what to make.

And then this came to mind. SO.

Just for you, to celebrate, here are some random and semi-crack headcanon/AUs!

(all Destiel mind you)

(this is kinda long so under the cut)

-Furry AU! 

Where Cas is a fuckin adorable ass, famous Fursona who goes to tons of cons and no one knows who he is and Dean went to like a Comic Con deal with Sam (this is like normal verse so no demons) and Cas is there and he’s like, intrigued, never seen a furry before. For some reason (insert reason here) Sam knows of him, cause maybe Sam’s gone to like anime cons and gaming cons with Jess and Dean ends up like idk. END GOAL = they date and Dean is Cas’s handler and Cas always acts hella cute around dean.

-Cat!AU

They’re cats. All of them. Nothing changes beside that everyone is cats.

-Check, Please!AU 

   **Dean = Jack

   **Sam = Shitty (they are separated at birth - JUST DONT QUESTION IT)

   **Bobby = Coach Murray (or other Coach)

   **John = Bad Bob (badass best hockey player ever)

   **Mary - Alicia (obvi - probs played women’s hockey before. Badass actress/model)

   **Cas - Bitty (how fuckin cute am i right)

   **Jess/Jody - Lardo (either go with Shardo ship or like more personality based????)

   **Kevin - Ransom

   **Charlier - Holster (we’re ignoring genders here. Also bros for life)

   **Crowley - Dex (cause he’s usually kinda high strung)

   **Gabe - Nursey (cause he’s chill) (also he and Crowley would totes fight)

   **Chuck - John Johnson

   **Garth - Chowder

   **Benny - Tater

   **Michael - Kent Parson

   **Luci - Fry Guy

((I warned you that some of these were crack. I ACTUALLY LIKE HAD TO REARRANGE THAT THO))

-Transformers AU

Dean and Sam are like Sam Witwicky (maybe they’re twins. Or they just, alter the plot of the 2007 movie to two people) and Cas is Bumblebee and Bobby is Optimus Prime aaand Crowley is Megatron and Gabe is Jazz (cause Jazz dies xD) Chuck is the AllSpark ummmm Ruby is Bone Crusher and Lillith is Star Scream aaand Garth is Ratchet and ummm Samuel Campbell is Iron Hide

Idek

(is it bad that I didn’t have to look up any of those? like the Transformer characters)

-Twilight!AU

   Cas is Bella. Dean is Edward. Idek about the rest. Bobby is probably Carlisle. Who would Jacob be? Maybe Crowley?

-Craigslist!Modelling Job AU

Dean is at a party with Charlie and Benny and a few other friends and they play Truth or Dare (”Guys, this is college. Why are we playing this?” - Kevin “Because it’s fun! Or are you just chicken?” -Charlie)

Dean gets dared to accept one random ad on craigslist. Charlie takes him to a random page.

This is the ad that catches his eye.

“Need a model. class project. i can’t pay much but i can get you pizza and drinks.”

Cas is the photographer. It actually is for a class project. Cas doesnt act flustered but he’s totally blushing during the shoot. Dean gives him his number. You know what happens next.

-Stripper!Dean!AU

   Cas goes to Gabe’s bachelor party and Dean is a stripper and gives Cas a lap dance and Cas was like so against coming to here cause he’s a Good Boy™ but he gets so like turned on and hot damn Dean is sexy.

Dean slips Cas his number and they go on a cute coffee date and Cas just like isn’t sure how to act because “I’ve seen you naked already?? And you totally knew I had a boner?? What are we??”

-GTAV!AU

Cas is Michael. Dean is Trevor.

Bam. Best AU.

-YouTube!AU

Cas is a cute ass blogger who does random collabs and travelling videos and occasionally does silly cooking stuff. His fans love him because of how genuine and like happy and smiley and just a really sweet guy. Does lots of charity work. His best friend Charlie is on sometimes, and his brother Gabe is in sometimes too when he comes for visits he loves to hop into the background and be like “YOU BETTER KEEP THIS IN THE FINAL CUT.”

Dean wanted to record him rebuilding Baby from the ground up one time and Sam edited it and made it more like a timelapse and told him he should put it on YouTube, so he did, for shits and giggles, and people really liked it. So now he does timelapses of him deconstructing and cleaning/reconstructing guns. As well as cars and other mechanical work. He’s done a few tutorials and Q&A’s. He also has a second channel, that he didn’t tell him main channel about, where he posts videos of him playing the guitar and singing covers of his favorite songs. (He keeps his face out of them).

Cas and Dean probably meet at a VidCon and become good friends.

They start dating and don’t ever announce it, but the fandom ships it so hard because of how cute/flirty they were at the con. They start noticing that Cas is wearing what appear to be Dean’s shirts, and some fans are in denial, and they ask both questions but they always just shrug it off.

Until one time, Dean wanders into one of Cas’s vlogs in only flannel pajama pants, holding two mugs of coffee, and hands one to Cas, gives him a kiss on the cheek with a husky. “Morning sunshine.” 

They start posting cute ass couple pictures after it and its just so cute.

-Olympic!AU

Dean is either a marksmen or a martial artist. I can’t decide. Gabe is a sports photographer and Cas is a professional ice skater and he follows Gabe to one of Dean’s things and they end up talking after cause Gabe is at his interview after (he won gold obvi) and Dean was like “I liked your routine.” and Cas is like “You know me???” and Dean says Sam always loved the ice sports and because of Sam he took a liking to ice skating and he skates sometimes but he thinks its really cool. (Sam is olympic volleyball player as a side note.) but they exchange numbers and hang out more and watch Sam play and its hella cute and they kiss.

-Singer!AU

Cas is a famous singer and Gabe is his quirky brother. Anna is his manager. Dean and Sam get hired as bodyguards. Dean and Cas hit it off and try *not* to date but they totally do.

Also Sabriel. 

They have to hire new bodyguards. Anna hates them. (not really, but she’s like “For real guys??”)

Jody gets hired. She’s badass. Charlie is Dean’s best friend and dying cause he is dating Cas, who she loves. Also Kevin is Sam’s and like is also jealous.

Bobby’s their adopted Dad.

-Post!Apocalypse!Vampire!Weird!AU

(long ass name ik but this is a random fuckin idea i thought of years ago and will never do anything with so i’m going to do my best to explain it here and share it with you)

SO. Heaven and Hell went to war, the world got *wasted*. A lot of angels fell and so did demons and their powers have been like diminished. The world is a wasteland and divided into segments and the demons kind of run the place and segments. The angels hide.

Dean and Sam are reincarnated. There is minimal food in this world and because of things and whatever, everyone drinks blood of various degrees to stay alive. Like they dont need much, but they need it. (If you’re rich, you have a lot of blood. It does make you stronger, but you can be fine with minimal).

Blood is also a currency. Animal blood is included in this, but its worth less than human blood.

So. Dean and Sam lost their parents early on, and Dean has always been caring for/fending for Sam. He gets caught stealing books, which are like rare as fuck but he hated that no one was reading them and he felt they were being wasted. (He was going to return them. He was a quick reader. He didn’t think they’d even miss them)

Anyways. Sam goes to jail. The price to free him (cause either he’s a repeat offender or the demon is like Alistair/another demon who recognizes their souls and ups the price cause they can) is like 4/5 liters of blood. Human blood. Sam tells Dean not to pay for it, he’ll be fine, but Dean pays with his own blood of course (cause thats how the whole human blood thing works. Rich people can pay in other people that they own but like you pay in your own blood normally).

Dean is like hella weak after this and tells Sam he’s fine. He takes a day off of work but his arm (where he cut himself) gets infected and like he gets really pale and collapses a few days later. 

Sam packs up all of their stuff and takes them to a miracle healer he’d heard about through the rumor mill.

Surprise. It’s Cas. And Gabe is with him.

Cas freaks out, cause they thought Sam and Dean were dead. Gabe stops Cas from telling him, tho, and like they heal Dean and Dean gets like a frickin flashback while he’s unconscious and being healed of like his previous life.

Also they have a horse named Impala. It was their fathers and its like the only thing they really own besides their tiny shack.

At some point, they get their memories back. They become friends with Gabe and Cas and like, maybe find some of the other fallen angels, and potentially even Crowley and like, do something? That’s all though.

------------------

That was more than I thought it’d be. And some of them actually got serious lol.

ANYWAYS.

I know it’s not a lot but I hope they made you smile and just, congrats Mandy! Happy 10k!!!! <3 <3 <3 <3