#i LOVE walls of text dont you? i sure hope so!

[keekity]

an accident-prone altmer dragonborn (who’s never conjured a spell in her life) gets told she’s the chosen one and sets off on a journey where she meets 3 outcasts--a banished orsimer prince who’s obsessed with himself; the kleptomaniac daughter of a bosmer & a succubus; a dunmer born with 0 fire resistance pretending he isn’t deathly afraid of butterflies--and probably ends up in a polycule.

outfits by @plazasims

[nadvs]

cam girl (part twelve) (end)

pairing rafe cameron x female reader

rating explicit 18+

content warning alcohol use

summary you work two jobs. by day, you’re a maid for the cameron household, where rafe degrades you any chance he can get. by night, you’re a cam girl, hiding your face so nobody can recognize you. when you discover your new subscriber, the filthy-mouthed man obsessively paying you to do everything he can think of, is rafe, you’re not sure what to do next.

» masterlist

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Rafe realizes his hands are shaking as he rereads your text.

His eyes keep going over your words, standing up off his bed and pacing around his room just because the adrenaline won’t let him stay seated.

Why the fuck are you doing this to him?

i’m done. this is over. i’m not even a fucking person to you am i

Hot anger bubbles inside his chest. He immediately texts you back: what the fuck do you mean

Minutes pass. You don’t answer.

Rafe: ?????

Again. No answer.

Rafe: dont ignore me

He can’t take it anymore. He taps on the Call button. It rings and rings and rings. He texts you again.

Rafe: answer me

Finally, you respond: i dont need to listen to you. leave me alone

This has to be a cruel joke. Yet again, you’re cold to him out of fucking nowhere, after he thought you had a good time together.

Rafe recalls this morning, to the worried look on your face when you saw his black eye, making him think that maybe you see something of value past the wall he built around him.

He risked his pride by telling you that he always thinks about you, and now you’re done with him?

He texts you again: why are u acting like this

Thank fuck you respond.

You: i guess the slut got bored of you first

His body goes cold. He knows you’re referring to what one of his friends said. You heard that?

If that’s why you’re so pissed off, he needs to talk to you about it in person. He grabs his car keys and rushes out of the house.

Rafe is pounding on your door for so long that his hand is starting to hurt almost as much as it did when he threw those punches last night.

He feels himself teetering on the edge, getting close to the manic state he knows and hates.

He pulls his phone out to text you: open the door

You: ??? i’m not home

At this point, he sees red. He could break his damn phone if he didn’t need it right now. He calls you again, his jaw clenched so tight that it hurts.

His stomach tightens when the dial tone stops after two rings.

“Am I gonna have to block your number?” you say when you answer. The sound of a crowd and loud music buzzes in the background. He clues in that you’re at a party.

“Where are you?” he asks, head hanging, staring at the hallway floor.

“That’s none of your business.” He can hear a slur in your words.

“Are you drunk?”

“I can drink if I want to. I know you love to think you own me, but you don’t.”

Rafe swallows hard, shaking his head, squeezing his eyes shut. He heard your voice shake. Fuck. You’re crying and it’s his fault.

“Where are you?” Rafe repeats. “Let’s - we need to…” He’s stammering, anxious and unbalanced. “We need to talk… I swear, I’ll fucking wait here until you come home if you don’t tell me where you are.”

Your back is against a wall, the phone pressed to your ear. The room is loud and humid from all the bodies crammed together into one house.

You hate that you’re crying over him and you hate that he can hear it. As if his ego needs the boost.

“Why?” you finally ask, voice strained, hoping he’ll tell you what you want to hear. That there’s a part of him that cares about you.

Rafe is silent for a moment.

“Which one is it?” His chest is tight. He can’t say it now. Not over the phone.

“Neither,” you reply, then hang up. You know he’s just horny and possessive and mad. And definitely bluffing.

You shouldn’t, you know you shouldn’t, but you take another shot. Time melts away from you as you get lost in the music with your friend, determined to get Rafe and his drama off of your mind.

It’s half past one in the morning when you order a cab. The alcohol has almost worn off at this point. Someone spilled a drink on you and you just want to take a shower and sleep. You have to promise yourself that you won’t give into the impulse to wear Rafe’s shirt to bed.

You exit the elevator and your heart stops when you see Rafe sitting on the floor, his back against your door, his knee raised, his head slumped.

He meant it. He waited. For over three fucking hours.

When you get close enough for him to hear your footsteps, Rafe clambers up to stand, towering over you. His eyes sweep over your face, the blue in them even more prominent in contrast to the dark bruise over his right eye.

Even though your heart, the traitor, is thumping with desire, the ache of what he did to you is louder. It was barbaric, what he said about you. What he let his friend say about you.

“Why are you still here?” you say as evenly as you can.

“You can’t…” Rafe shakes his head, frustrated. He immediately notices you’re not wearing the necklace he gave you and his chest aches. “You can’t end this.”

“Watch me,” you say with a scoff, nudging past him. You feel him behind you, hear his shallow breaths. You unlock your door and pull out your keys.

He won’t move. You turn to look at him again, feeling your lips thin in aggravation.

“Rafe,” you state. “Please. I just want to shower and sleep. Go home.”

“No,” he says stubbornly.

“Why can’t you just go find another girl to fuck around with?” you say, raising your tone.

He almost feels nauseous hearing you say that.

“Are you worried you won’t find one who does everything like I do?” you ask. “I just can’t say no, right? That’s what you told your friends.”

Rafe looks down in shame, nostrils flaring. His lips screw up in anger. He has no words to offer.

“Go home,” you repeat. You’re sure he’s just upset about losing his favorite booty call, just so not accustomed to not getting what he wants.

Rafe doesn’t budge. You’re sober enough to know you can’t continue this conversation in the hallway and risk your voices carrying into your neighbors’ homes.

Frustrated and embittered, you turn your doorknob and accept the fact that he’s not leaving without a fight.

You turn on the dim overhead light and stand in your tiny kitchen, facing Rafe with your arms crossed, as the door shuts behind him.

He steps towards you, hands sliding up your arms before he leans down to try to kiss you.

“Stop,” you mutter, shoving him off, pushing him away.

He tries again, putting his palms on your cheeks.

“No,” you snap, driving him away harder.

Rafe feels hollow. Lost. He’s fine with showing anger. It’s second nature to him. But this? This tangled feeling of yearning feels impossible to verbally express to you.

“Why?” is all he can sputter.

“I’m not letting you use me anymore,” you say through gritted teeth.

Rafe had no idea you’d react like this over the moronic shit he and his friend said. He thought you were fine with how things were. That you were detached.

Despite the rage and anxiety consuming him, the fact that you’re this angry over this ridiculous idea that you’re not a person to him, that you maybe want to be more, makes hope bloom in his heart.

“It’s not like that,” Rafe says.

“It is,” you argue. “I’m done acting like I’m okay with it. I could handle it at the beginning, but…”

You sigh. You can’t give him the satisfaction of telling him you have feelings for him. You start to get choked up again, though, your body betraying you. You can’t hide what he does to you from him anymore.

“I’m done,” you say resolutely. This man is nothing but trouble. “My contact picture in your phone is a fucking nude. I’m just body parts to you and I respect myself too much to keep this going. Just leave. You won’t change my mind.”

“I can’t… I can’t not see you anymore,” he grovels.

“You’re just mad you won’t be able to brag to your buddies about what I let you do to me.”

“No.” Rafe brings the heels of his hands up to his eyes, looking so damn flustered. “I’m not mad about that. I… Fuck, it’s…”

“What about when he called me a slut to run through? You laughed. After he said something so fucking horrible about me-”

“Wait,” he snaps, tone rising. “Just wait. Let me talk.”

“Then talk,” you say sharply, shocked by his audacity to be the angry one here.

He takes a deep breath.

“When he called you that, I…” Rafe rakes his hand through his hair. “It’s how we always talk and I - I know that’s a shitty excuse, but I didn’t have the balls to tell him to shut the fuck up. And then last night…”

He vaguely gestures to his black eye. His mind replays the rage he felt when he heard the vulgar words used to describe you. The way his fist met his friend’s jaw. Rafe walked away with a swollen eye, but it was nothing compared to what he had inflicted.

“He said something about you and I beat the shit out of him like I should’ve the first time.”

“What’d he say?” you ask after a beat.

“It doesn’t matter.”

So, that’s what happened to him last night. You’re almost touched to hear he defended your honor, but the memory of the text you saw on his phone darkens your mood instantly, reminding you of how dispensable and cheap it made you feel.

“This the same friend who texted you about all the bitches at that party?” you say bitterly.

Rafe meets your gaze.

“You saw that?”

“Yeah,” you say. Rafe realizes that was the reason for your abrupt coldness. You were jealous. He hates that he hurt you, but admittedly, the feeling of you being envious over him is so fucking gratifying.

He sighs your name. He didn’t even glance at another girl last night. Why would he? “For fuck’s sake, I texted you all night. I told you I’m always thinking about you.”

“Rafe, you texted me about how all you want to do is hook up with me.”

“That’s not… that’s not all I want,” he sighs, defeated. How can he explain that the way he touches you is how he tells you what he’s feeling? He’s so fucking bad at talking about it.

“Then why did you talk about me like that?” you ask.

“I was…” Rafe begins. He swallows hard, his eyes refusing to meet yours now. “I know I shouldn’t have said that shit but-”

“You’re only saying this now ‘cause you got caught.”

“No, it’s - it’s more than that. I-”

“You were just being honest,” you say with a shrug. “I did everything you told me to and you wanted to brag.”

“Yeah- I mean, no…” he stammers. Your use of the past-tense is so damn hurtful, the implication that you really are through with him, and before he can think to hide it, tears start to gloss his eyes. “Just listen-”

“If I’m just an easy fuck to you, then that’s fine, just own up to it.”

“Let me talk!” he finally shouts. Rafe’s head is spinning. He’s angry and anxious and close to losing his mind.

You don’t even cower, not letting him get to you. But when you realize he’s crying, too, your blood runs cold.

“Goddamn it.” He frantically brings his hands up to his head, fingers on his temples. “I’m trying to tell you that I didn’t know how to- I don’t know how to talk about this fucking feeling you give me.”

“Try,” you say.

Rafe’s breath is shaky, blinking fast as he gazes at you.

“This is more than sex. I’m fucking… I’m falling for you,” he finally admits.

No words come to your mind. The air between you is thick. Your heart is pounding in your ears. Your stomach is numb.

Rafe lowers his gaze, his chest rising and falling rapidly. He’s worked himself up in such a panic.

He doesn’t know how or when you cracked into this side of him that he didn’t even know existed, but you did. And you’re not leaving.

“Are you serious?” you ask quietly through a shallow exhale.

“Do I need to beg you to believe me?” he says.

“Yeah,” you say with a sarcastic huff, pushing him to see where his limit is. To see if he’s being honest.

You can’t believe what you’re seeing when Rafe sinks down onto the floor in front of you, his knees on your cheap linoleum. He takes your hand in his, pulling it to his warm mouth, soft lips kissing your palm.

He realizes he would rather lose all of his pride than lose you.

“Rafe,” you say, the edge to your tone completely gone now.

The shift in your dynamic is harrowing. He’s always the one in control, the one with the upper hand. Now he’s on his fucking knees for you.

“I’m sorry,” he says, eyes locked on yours. “I’m so fucking sorry I said that shit. I’ll never do it again. You’re not just an easy…”

He can’t even say it.

“You’re so much more,” he says. There’s hopelessness in his gaze. You’re rattled with shock, your heart feeling like it’s burning in your chest.

You can’t believe it. You can’t fathom that he likes you more than just from the waist down.

“What if I stopped hooking up with you?” you challenge. “I keep seeing you but it’s nothing physical. What then?“

“That’s okay,” he says, without hesitation.

“I mean no sex,” you say. “At all.”

“Fine.”

You pout at him in endearment as relief pools through you.

Rafe is racked with the deepest form of desperation. He can’t picture a day without you. Without your smile, your humor, your voice, your smell. He fell off the deep end and there’s no fucking saving him.

Your stare is puncturing him. He’s sure he fucked up too massively to earn any sort of chance with you ever again.

But when you finally lean down to press your lips onto his, euphoria rushes through his entire being. He frantically scrambles to stand, feeling his face contort with disbelief and gratefulness and a yearning so hard that it hurts.

Rafe’s kisses are deep but fast, his big hands cradling your head, thumbs rubbing over your cheekbones.

You pull back, looking up at him with a tiny shred of remaining suspicion that he’s not being genuine.

“Let me stay the night,” he says, voice low, lids heavy. You’re unsure that he really means he’d be with you even without the sex.

You only look at him.

“I won’t try anything,” he adds. He knows you needed the reassurance. You stare at him with wide, vulnerable eyes, resting your hands on his firm, heaving chest.

“Shower with me,” you tell him, restless to wash the night off of you. “And prove it.”

Rafe nods, your face still in his hands. Fuck, he feels like you have him wrapped around your finger. He’d do anything to keep you in his life.

“Let me do the work,” he says.

You step back, heart racing, and raise your hands over your head. His fingers quickly find the edge of your top, slowly lifting it and pulling it off of you. Your jeans are next, the denim sliding down your legs.

Rafe presses against you, leading you backwards into your bathroom. His lips press against your forehead as he unhooks your bra and lets it fall to the floor.

He’s on his knees again as he peels your underwear off. You watch his eyes trail up your bare body. He can’t hide the lust in his stare, no matter how hard he tries.

As you turn on the shower, you hear the rustle of him taking his clothes off. When you step into the tub, you feel his body against your back. Big hands skim up your arms as you turn the faucet, prompting hot water to rain down on both of you.

Rafe can’t stop himself from asking.

“Did you talk to any guys at that party?” His voice echoes against the porcelain, loud even over the sound of the shower.

You smile to yourself.

“How am I gonna focus on another guy when you’re texting me so damn much?”

“Princess,” he huffs. You laugh and turn in his arms to rest your hands on his shoulders.

“No,” you tell him. “I didn’t want to.”

Rafe smirks and leans down, but stops an inch away from your lips.

“Am I allowed to kiss you?” he asks.

“Hmm… fine,” you tease. “But that’s the farthest you can go.” He captures your lips in his, his mouth warm. You feel him grow against you and you pull away to look down, his cock already almost fully hard.

“Okay, I can’t control that,” he says. You meet his eyes and share the first laugh that you’ve had together tonight.

You pick up your body wash and hand it to him. It’ll drive him crazy to touch you like this and not be able to do anything about it.

“You get my body,” you say, admittedly excited to tempt him. “And I’ll do my hair.”

Rafe’s forehead crinkles in concentration as he squeezes the body wash into his palm. Your eyes are on him as he lathers the gel over your shoulders first.

“You’re cute when you’re focused,” you giggle, starting to massage your shampoo into your hair.

The sound of your laugh, the aroma in the air is so fucking nice to him. It’s so you.

His palms move up and down your arms in gentle circles. Rafe’s groin is getting tighter by the second and the fact that he won’t get any relief for it is agony. But he needs to prove himself to you.

“You ignoring my tits on purpose?” you ask.

Rafe cocks his head in mild irritation. Touching you there will only make him harder. You exhale in pleasure once his hands rest on your breasts, gently kneading.

“You can’t make those sounds,” he says, voice strained.

“I can do whatever I want,” you reply. His hands dip below the curves of your tits. You purposely moan louder than you normally would just to torment him.

His jaw tightens as he collects more of your body wash to smooth down your stomach. His hands slide over your hips, the water and soap making your skin extra slippery, and he lands on your ass.

“Massage me a bit there,” you tell him. He huffs an aggravated chuckle, then starts to rub into your flesh.

The crook of Rafe’s neck is at your chin as he leans to massage you and you plant a gentle kiss on his wet skin. The gesture makes his stomach twist with adoration.

“Okay, that’s enough,” he mumbles, running his hands up your back. You can feel him against your leg; he’s fully erect and pining for you to touch him.

“My ass is still sore,” you groan, continuing to lather the shampoo onto your hair. “You were so rough on me in front the mirror, remember?”

The memory of fucking you on the floor in his room makes his arousal skyrocket even higher. He exhales and smooths his hands over your ass again.

You tilt your head to the side as you moan. You feel Rafe’s mouth press against your exposed neck, then he grunts against your skin and moves away abruptly.

“Getting frustrated?” you whisper.

“No,” he lies.

The hot water continues to ebb down your body as Rafe squeezes your ass.

“You can get my legs now,” you mumble. He’s half-relieved, half-frustrated to have to move his hands.

Rafe rubs in circles over your thighs, his breath heavy.

“Get on your knees so you can reach everything,” you say as you wash out the shampoo from your hair. You’re testing him, ordering him around like he usually does to you, seeing if he’ll crack.

When he kneels down, you hike your leg up onto the tub, your middle inches away from his face.

“Fuck,” he breathes, wishing he could just taste you. His hands are sliding down your calves as he gawks at the beauty between your legs, knowing you’re purposely tempting him.

His eyes trail up to your face. He looks ravenous for you.

Falling for you. He said he was falling for you.

“What?” you say with a smile. Rafe only shakes his head, continuing to run his hands over your legs.

“I said kissing is allowed,” you say, revelling in this feeling of control over him.

He doesn’t waste a second. His lips are against your pussy immediately, kissing you over and over. If you tried to keep count of how many kisses he was planting on you, you’d fail in seconds.

Arousal twists deep inside you, wanting him so badly, but loving the game you’re playing.

His lips wrap around your clit and he starts to suck, prompting you push your fingers through his hair, damp from the shower, and tug to pull him off of you.

“Kisses only,” you say. “Unless you didn’t mean what you said?”

“I did,” he huffs. He roughly shoves your wrist away to get close to you again, lips puckered. You feel his fingers ghost over your inner thighs, then pull apart your lips.

“Can I spread you open, baby?” he asks.

“No,” you respond.

“Please,” he begs.

“Kisses. Only.”

He groans. You laugh.

“You got me so turned on,” you moan. “I need to just…”

You slip your fingers between his mouth and your clit, denying him any more access.

Rafe thinks this could be thing to that finally makes him lose his fucking mind. But he stays still, knees aching from the hard tub, as you play with yourself right in front of him.

“That feels so nice,” you whisper, your knees weak. You put your other hand against the shower wall, looking down at him.

“Hold me up,” you order. He grips your hips and watches you moan and writhe over him, dipping your head back.

You dip a finger inside of you, tightening and sighing.

“Fuck.” He literally whimpers the word.

“God, there’s so many things I can think about while I touch myself,” you moan. “Like when we fucked in your car? Or when I squirted on you?”

“Which time?” he mutters, trying to have any sort of power right now by reminding you of what he can do to you.

“Aw,” you coo. “Is this like when I’m on camera? You can watch but you can’t touch me?”

“Shit,” Rafe breathes. You moan, the water dripping off of you.

He has to look away at this point. His cock is so hard that it hurts. His eyes go low, seeing a bead of precum on his swollen tip. He tries to comfort himself by thinking about how he can jerk off later.

“Get up,” you say. He brings himself up on his feet, towering over you again.

You turn your back to him again and start to rub your scalp to make sure you washed all the shampoo out.

“You’re probably cold on that side, hmm?” you ask.

Rafe’s temperature is the least of his concerns.

“I’ll keep you warm,” you tell him, looking over your shoulder. You run your hands down your body and pause over your ass, spreading yourself open.

“Put your cock right here,” you tell him.

“I- I can’t,” he moans.

“You can,” you encourage.

He kneels to place himself right where you want him. You let go, your asscheeks hugging him, feeling his length pressed up against you.

“Fuck,” he whispers, twitching against you. “This is… fuck…”

“If you didn’t mean that you can be with me without the sex, just say so.”

“I meant it,” he says. “But this is torture. I need to go. I’ll wait for you in your room, okay?”

“You can’t keep it together for me?” you tease. “I thought you liked me.”

“I fucking love you,” Rafe groans, making your heart flutter.

You’re done playing this game. You need him now.

You turn to face him, pulling him down with your hands cupping his neck to kiss him. He’s biting your bottom lip, kissing you hard.

“We don’t have to do this,” he whispers breathlessly.

“I want to,” you say against his lips, wrapping your hand around his cock. “What do you want?” He bucks up against you, groaning.

“I wanna fuck you,” he pleads.

“Then fuck me.”

Rafe’s rough and fast as he hitches your leg up, pushing you to lean against the shower wall. He lines himself up at your cunt, stretching you so much nicer than your fingers ever could.

He keeps his eyes on you when he thrusts into you, his expression both needy and satisfied.

“Thank you,” he whispers. The feeling of him thanking you for letting him be inside you hits you like a drug.

Rafe is in heaven. You squeeze him so fucking good as he rocks in and out of you. He needs to make you cum before he does. You deserve it. You deserve all the pleasure in the world.

When he starts to rub his thumb over your clit, you’re trembling with bliss. Everything in this moment feels so damn good.

“You’re my girl,” he mumbles, his usual possessive side back now. “Say it.”

“I’m your girl,” you respond. “Fuck… I love you.”

Rafe is sure he has never felt happier in his life. His thrusts get harder and faster, and with the pressure on your clit and the hot water coating your body, you whine through your orgasm.

To him, it’s a gift watching you reach your peak. You clench around him in rhythmic flutters and he can’t hold back anymore, his cum gushing out of him so fucking hard that he sees stars.

This is the best sex he’s ever had. Because now he knows it’s more than just something physical for both of you.

He kisses you hard as his body trembles, pumping into you. His forehead is against yours as you pant together and even though he’s exhausted, he stays inside you as long as he can manage.

When he pulls out, he brings his hands to your cheeks and kisses you again.

“You meant that?” he asks. He needs to know you that really do love him. That it wasn’t a heat of the moment thing. You look up at him, his lips parted, the water dripping down his face.

“Yes,” you say. His dimples are deep in his cheeks as he smiles at you.

As Rafe helps you clean up, he’s pissed at himself that he never did this before. He hates that you had to always do this alone. He won’t ever let that happen again.

Once you’re both lying in your bed, your bedroom dark save for a streetlamp casting a dull light through the window, Rafe holds you tight.

Your cheek is against his shoulder as he surrounds you in his arms. You both remained naked and the feeling of your bare bodies pressed together like this is perfection.

You softly trace your finger over the bruise covering his eye. The one his friend left on him because of something he said about you.

“What’d he say?” you ask.

“I’m not repeating it,” Rafe replies.

“Please?” you ask. “I wanna know what made you go crazy.”

“He said I seem happier lately,” Rafe says. “And before I told him it was because I wanna… be with you for real, he said… he wants to see if he could get…”

“God,” you mutter, rolling your eyes. He doesn’t have to say any more. His buddy wanted a turn with you.

“But hey, I’m not gonna let anyone say anything like that about you, okay?” he promises. “I’ll beat the shit out of anyone who tries to.”

You picture being out in public with Rafe, his arm around you. And you can’t help but ask. You need to know.

“So… are you gonna… want me around your friends and stuff?” you ask.

“Of course,” he tells you, as if it’s the most obvious thing in the world. “You’re my girl, right?”

It’s jarring. You’re not a lower-class maid to him. Not his personal whore. Not his slutty sugar baby. You’re a woman he loves.

Legs tangled, you fall asleep together, and you adore that the worry of falling for him is now gone. Because you’re in love, and so is he, and now you can enjoy him without telling yourself you can’t.

When you wake up the next morning, you shuffle in your position to find him, but you’re alone.

Your heart drops. Could he have been faking…?

You can’t jump to that conclusion. You’re about to check your phone when you hear crinkling coming from the kitchen.

You put on underwear and the shirt you stole from him a while ago before padding into the kitchen. He’s standing over your table, removing containers from bags.

You realize it’s from your favorite nearby bistro. He ordered food for you.

“Breakfast?” you ask. Rafe looks up at you and he doesn’t understand how every time he sees you, you strike him with how adorable you are.

“You hungry?” he says.

You settle across from him at the table. You realize he must have referenced the screenshot you sent him after the first night that he stayed over, when he sent you money to order breakfast and you sent him proof of what you bought.

As you dig into your food, you gaze at him. Blue eyes meet yours. He smirks. It doesn’t feel real. He used to look so out of place in your apartment, but this feels so natural.

“We gonna talk about how much of a cuddler you are?” you tease.

“Shut up,” he laughs. “Eat your food.”

You laugh and continue to chew.

“What do you have to do today?” he asks.

“I should study,” you say. “I was going to last night after work, but you know…”

Rafe looks down and his Adam’s apple bobs with his hard swallow.

“Are you gonna keep working?” he asks. “I don’t want you to. I wanna take care of you.”

As much as he loves seeing you around his house twice a week, he’s been getting more and more uncomfortable with the idea of you having to work so hard, having to clean up after him.

“Yeah,” you finally say. “I think I need to have the independence. To know I’m working for my own money. Does that make sense?”

“With your attitude? Yeah,” he says. You laugh.

You hope the gossip between your coworkers doesn’t get any farther up the chain. For now, you want to keep your job and the steadiness it promises.

“You can’t pull me away from my work to hook up whenever you want, though, okay?” you say.

“Even when I find you in my bed?” he asks.

“That was one time,” you scoff.

Rafe leans over to place his phone in front of you. He has your contact info up. The photo isn’t what it was before, though. It’s a photo of you sleeping, cheek pressed on his chest.

He must have taken it this morning. He wants to prove you’re not just a body to him.

Your eyes study his screen and you smile, oblivious to the fact that he’s staring at you.

But then again, you never really noticed how much he looked at you whenever you came to work at the house.

He can still remember the rush he felt when he randomly found you on that damn website. You were a fucking fantasy to him, a dream that he never thought he’d get to live out.

But here you are and by some crazy stroke of luck, you found something in him worth loving.

Rafe always enjoyed having some sort of ownership over you, claiming you as his. Because deep down, he always kind of knew he belonged to you. Whether you want him or not, he’s yours.

(the end) (continuation blurbs)

author’s note: THANK YOU ALL SO MUCH FOR ALL THE LOVE AND SUPPORT FOR THIS SERIES 💘 it’s so bittersweet ending it. i had so much fun writing this and it’s because of your comments and messages 😭 i’ll be writing more fics! if you want updates, please follow @xorafe-library and turn on notifications since i’ll be reblogging my work there. love you all!!!

[sweetheart-satoru]

his eyes, breathtaking

you tried to ignore him and your feelings, but they were stubborn.

author's note: me cuz i promised part two in october and now it's here 🙈🙈 don't hate me at least it's here 💋 i love you silly billies 🫶🏽

part one here !!

"you two in a fight or somethin'?" shoko says, leaning back in her chair. satoru places his cheek in his palm, "dunno, she's definitely mad at me, though." suguru tilts his head, "how come?"

"i dont know, can you ask her about it?" shoko shrugs, "i'll ask her at break." satoru nods, "thanks." you and satoru sit behind shoko and suguru. two seats in each spot.

when you walk into class you just stare out the window until shoko makes small talk with you, hoping the awkwardness would pass. “y/n, your bracelet is pretty.”

“thank you!” you grin at her, mood changing instantly. “yeahh,” satoru agrees, and he frowns as he watches your grin turn neutral, “i like it too, by the way.” he coughs. “mhm.. thanks, gojo.” you went back to the last name basis, and his heart drops.

shoko gives him a look, pointing at his phone, telling him to text her. and he does, along does suguru.

shoko: shes def mad

satoru: thanks a lot, i didn’t notice 😐!!

suguru: why is she mad tho?? what did you do??

satoru: why are you guys blaming me?! i don’t know either.

you cough, “hey- uh, shoko.. i’m gonna go to the washroom, ‘kay? if the bell rings before im back i’ll meet you by the gates.” you tell her before walking out. “mhm, okay!” she calls out. and when you shut the door she immediately turns to satoru and suguru.

“suguru, did you hear that? earlier, she called satoru by his last name. something is totally wrong.” and suguru nods, agreeing. “well, satoru. you should go follow her. this is your chance. the bell will ring soon so it doesn’t matter how much time you take, go!”

satoru nods, “mhm, okay!” and then he rushes out of class, going to see if he can finally talk to you.

you splash cold water on your face. mumbling to yourself, "get your shit together, y/n." you weren't going to lie, on a hot day like this, the cold water felt nice. patting your cheeks, you stare into the mirror, feeling a little bit less disgusted with yourself.

"oh, hey! i don't look too ugly today!" you give yourself a half grin, taking out a tube of lipgloss and lip tint from your pocket. "i'll just fix this up.." you say to yourself quietly.

when you're done you fix your hair, "not too bad, y/n." you smile to yourself, quietly feeling good. you were right to tell shoko to leave class and not wait, you were taking too much time and the bell did ring.

you check your phone and see that she texted you.

shoko: me and suguru are headed to the convenience store, satoru also went to the washroom so you two can meet up with us together

you visibly frown, oh shit. okay, y/n. just play it cool. if you hurry up maybe you can rush to them and you won't need to see him. yeah, if you hurry up you can make it without it. or you can wait it out and hope he leaves without you.

feeling your stomach growl, you screw idea #2 and just speed walk out of the washroom, making a quick turn before in the corner of your eye you see satoru leaning on the wall with his arms crossed. he was looking down at his phone, but now that your in his eye line, he raises his brows.

"wow, you sure take your time. im telling shoko she can't blame me for being late as this time it was your fault." he walks up to you and boops your nose.

you push his hand away, scrunching your nose. "mhm," you nod, cursing yourself for being too late, "lets uh, just go." he shakes his head, "nope."

narrowing your eyes, "huh? nope?" he grabs your wrist, "yeah, nope." he repeats, bringing you closer to him, and he frowns when you pull back. "lets talk."

"talk? talk about what? can we just go? im hungry." you complain, trying to pull your arm out. before (pt 1), when he grabbed your wrist he only held it lightly, now he was gripping it like if he let go, you would disappear.

"you're," you grunt, "hurting me." quietly, he mumbles a quick apology, but never fully lets go, just loosening his hold. "are you mad at me? and be serious, i don't want any half assed answer. tell me what you're feeling." he frowns.

"im.. im not mad at you." you look down to your shoes, and it's true. you weren't mad at him. you were mad at how he made you feel. you hate having feelings, especially with someone you're close with. it always comes back to bite you back in the ass. "then what is it?"

you stay silent. "y/n i know it has to be something to do with me, every time you speak to someone else you're back to being yourself, but when it's me it's like you hate me." your eyes widen, "i don't hate you." you blurt, and he gives you a sad smile. "then what is it? did i make you sad?"

"yes, but no, but like yes maybe kinda no. yes as in yes it has something to do with you, but no nothing you did intentionally." he raises his brow at that, "then what did i 'yes but no like yes maybe kinda no' do to you to make you stop talking to me for seven days?" you watch the hurt and sadness swirl in his eyes, his beautiful, breathtaking eyes.

"it's.. complicated! i don't know how to explain, it's just complicated!" you crouch down, into a frog like position. and he mimics your frog pose, bringing his face closer to yours, trying to figure out what was wrong.

"it's just, all in my head! i don't.. know.." you mutter, trailing off. "what're you thinking in here," he mumbles, "what are you thinking in your pretty little head." he taps two fingers on your forehead, and all you can think about his making out with him until your lips are too kiss-swollen to be touched.

"..stuff." you whisper, burying your face inside your hands, trying to hide your face that's on the verge of exploding with embarrassment. "oh, i get it." his lips curve into a smirk. all sadness gone.

he chuckles, and his chuckles turn into loud laughter. and his loud laughing turns into full on cackling until he really, truly cannot breathe.

"what are you laughing at..." you feel your heart pounding. it feels like its about to burst and fall right in between you two. he's still laughing, trying to cover his mouth to try and stop it. he's laughing so hard you see tears fall out of his eyes. "i can't fucking breathe!" he gasps for air, still laughing.

"oh my god, you're in love with me!" your heart drops to your stomach, and he's still laughing. his eyes are squeezed shut, he's gripping onto his pants like his life depends on it because he seriously cannot breathe.

all this time, for seven days you've ignored talking to him and texting him back, not because you were mad at him but because you had fucking feelings for him! oh god, he should've put the pieces together!

every time you would smile to yourself if your fingers brushed together, how you would look sad when someone who go up to him and confess, how you would smile down at him with a certain time of warmth when he would tie your shoelaces for you, how you would hug him longer than nessasary when he would pay for you food

"god! it's impossible to talk to you!" you hiss, getting up to leave to god knows where. just as you're about to turn your heel, going to walk away, he grabs your wrist.

"satoru, let go, just leave me alo-" he cuts you off by placing his hands on your cheeks, and then you feel his soft lips on yours. your eyes widen as you feel him bringing you closer to him. squeezing your eyes shut, you try and keep up with his skilled lips. he just took your first kiss and you don't know what you're doing!

he breaks the kiss off and grins down at you. "was that your first kiss?" you just turn your head away, trying to hide your flustered face. "you suck." he snickers, teasing you.

you frown, "shut up! you just caught me off guard, that's all! and if you must know i have kissed many people!" you were straight up lying through your teeth and he smirks, knowing.

"prove it. kiss me again. show me you're experienced." he leans against the wall, eyeing you like a hawk. "no. let's go to shoko and suguru, im hungry!" it wasn't like you were lying now, it's true. you were starved. "no?" he questions, cocking his head to the side. "no." you repeat, "now lets go." you try and drag his arm. he just chuckles and follows you.

he intertwines your fingers together, holding you close to him. he watches you from the corner of his eyes as you randomly look at both of your hands, and then turn away smiling. he also turns his head away to smile. a faint blush rested on his cheeks before he stops you both.

he lets go of your hand before using it to turn your head to him to place a small kiss on your lips again. when you pull back, "you still suck." he leans in to kiss you again but you just shove him. "ugh shut up!"

you speed walk ahead of him, "you're the one who sucks!" he just laughs, "don't leave me behinddddd!!" to which the response he got back was getting flipped off.

as you keep walking ahead, even though he could easily catch up with his lanky long legs, he just runs and jumps on your back, yelling out, "piggy back ride!"

you stumble forwards, holding onto his legs making sure he doesn't fall over, "you idiot, we could've fallen!" you laugh, and he just wraps his arms around you, careful as not to choke you, and kisses your head, "but you love me so even if we fell you'll forgive me."

"yeah, yeah, whatever." you grumble, adjusting him on your back. and he grins, snuggling his face into your neck, loving the sweet smell of (whatever you smell like that's good) and shutting his eyes.

"i love you too." and he can basically feel the grin stretched onto your face.

i accidentally deleted most of the work so now it's not even good :( it literally looks like i shat in my hand, gave it to you and called it writing.. the first version was so much better 🤐

anyways tags for the lovelies that have been waiting months of this <3 @ari-hatake15 @chuuberrysworld @solialuna @kazuahhh @voidsatoru <3 @loquia @mykyoon @i-be-teff @arminsgfloll @4evahevah @the-devilskid @ys2800 sorry if i didn't tag you some of them aren't showing up :(

[iid-smile]

Hiii, I know this is probably a weird request and if it's triggering or just something you'd not want to write I totally understand!!! Just was thinking if you could write Nanami or Toji with a s/o who's always had their family manage their eating in an obsessive way so they sometimes have trouble with it and their weight. And they'd help them through it???

If not it's totally okayy, I also love your work a lot hust wanted to swoop that in here🫶🏻🫶🏻🫶🏻

Lots of lovee

perfect portion , fushiguro toji

x gn!reader , toji swearing, cw: mentions of scales, weight, not eating enough, body image, and food.

author's note: i decided to go with toji (which was very much a struggle) since i thought i had enough of nanami on my page (its a love hate relationship at this point) but if you want him instead, or don't like this one (i dont like it either because i clearly gave up at the end) slide in again and i'll deliver just for you!!!! 🫵😤 also i didn't proofread because i pushed through my writers block for this

thank you for your love anon! 🫶 i hope you enjoy!

─────────────୨ৎ─────────────

the jingling of keys in the distance was a sign that toji finally came home. you could hear his heavy footsteps walking around the house, before coming towards the bedroom where you lay on the bed.

after opening the door, he lets out a sigh. "stay awake for me, sugar. 'm gonna order us pizza." his voice is barely comprehensible from his mumbles, but since it's such a common phrase, you understand what he says.

"oh..." your voice lightens and a short, near sheepish chuckle comes from you. "no, no thanks. i think ive had enough meals today."

he so obviously screws his face from what you said, not that you're looking, and he drops off a few belongings that were in his pockets onto the dresser before glancing over his shoulder. "what?"

in surprise, you look up from your phone. yes, sometimes toji could be a bit pushy with what he wants, but you're sure that the way you said no was obvious that you did not want to be convinced about it. did he not hear you right? "i said i ate enough today."

he scoffs, turning around to face you. "uh...no the fuck you didn't?"

"i did...? i'm sure i did. i told you."

"oh, come on. do you think i'm stupid now? is that it?"

"what?"

"i called you at three in the afternoon, and only then were you telling me you were having breaktast. you woke up way before me." he gestures over to the clock on the wall. "and look at the time. it's nine, and i only saw one dish in the sink."

"yeah. i ate."

"okay. fine, fine. i'll assume the best." he sighs in resignation, turning around and eyeing a piece of paper that he just now noticed was on the dresser. "and what the hell is this? what d'ya need these numbers for, huh?"

that was not supposed to be there for him to see. your eyebrows furrow, but you try to play off your tone as natural. "y'know... from the scale 'n stuff..."

"scale? what scale—? you bought a scale without telling me?"

mistake. well, your first mistake was not asking what he was actually referring to. he didn't notice that anyways, but your second was accidentally telling him that you bought a scale. "well, every house has one, don't they?"

toji was genuinely so flabbergasted to the point where he had to shake his head in disbelief. "not this one, no. because nobody needs one." his steps are obnoxiously loud as he approaches your side."hell, this isn't even about money anymore. why would you need a scale of all things?"

"..." his responses were fast. too fast, and faster than usual. it would've been easier if this was over text, but in person? it's ten times more difficult to think of an excuse. "because i need one." was the first one you thought of.

"who's been telling you to use a scale?"

"nobody..."

"nobody?"

"nobody."

"somebody, clearly. you think you just wake up one day, start writin' down your weight like it's important." he scrunches up the paper, tossing it off somewhere out of your sight. "it's fine, you look fine, and 'm ordering pizza because i want you to eat it."

"and i shouldn't—" you look down at your phone that you put down next to you at some point in the conversation, a notification flashing on the screen, but you weren't paying attention to that. you were looking at the time. around about now would you be getting a weight check...

"who the fuck's sayin' that? sayin' for you not to eat like that? 'cause it's not me." and he leans in closer to you. "so, who's tellin' you to use a scale?"

silence. long and loud. this was one of the last things you'd ever want to admit to him. he's a guy that's extremely proud of his strength, stays in great shape, unreal body proportions, and you're just... you. there's nothing special about you, about your appearance, about your body.

"listen, i won't do anything you don't want me to..." his face suddenly grows to look conflicted, and though the times he does are rare, he makes an effort to soften his voice. "tell me one thing. are you hungry?"

as much as you want to hesitate, as much as you want to put your foot down and say no, your stomach is telling you something different. you're more surprised that the entire time toji has been in a relationship with you, he hasn't heard how ungodly audible your stomach growls can really get. the urge is unstoppable; you just had to nod.

"then what are you waiting for? i'll order whatever you're craving." and out the bedroom he goes, making his way over to the house phone in the hallway. "if it would make you feel better, i'll eat the same amount as you do, so i can show you that it's okay. no more small portions for you."

"and if it makes me unhealthy? if i get sick?" you sound a little amused.

the tapping noises on the phone stops. toji didn't think about that part. "...i'll take you to the hospital. tell me what you want to eat 'n give me the takeout number."

─────────────୨ৎ─────────────

[brooke2valley]

Heya, hope you’re having a nice day, I love your art! I wanted to ask if you had any tips for bringing being trans up to family? Not going to lie, a few of my family members are either borderline or outright transphobic. Even for family members like my dad, who aren’t necessarily transphobic -he just doesn’t understand it, he’s not against it per se- it’s not that I feel like he’ll yell at me, i’m more worried about losing his respect. Do you have any advice for how to approach him or other family members about being trans?

Sorry for the wall of text, thank you so much and have a nice night ma’am!

Firstly you wanna always make sure you're safe, if something is going to put you at risk of being Seriously hurt, dont do it.

Second you don't have to come out to everyone all at once, if you have people who you believe would accept you, id start with them. They may even help to talk to the people who are less open-minded.

Thirdly, just make sure theyre aware that this isn't a split decision, it stinks but a lot of cis people seem to believe being trans is something you just up and decide to be with no real considerations. You shouldn't have to explain yourself, but sadly due to the cis-hetero normative world we find ourselves in, it can help to be prepared to explain.

Be yourself and be confident, much love ❤️

[mystarsohee]

heyhey kae ! missing u MWAH there's a kiss ! was just wondering if u had time in ur busy schedule to write some more cg!shotaro? just missing him atm,, hope u understand. thanks ! <3

— @swee7dream

we makin' music

genre: fluff

riizes new music video came out.. and now shotaro has to deal with your fixation on it.

!!! non-sexual agere, only cg name used is taro.

cg!shotaro fem!reader , (ft. rii7e) ((seunghan is here even tho he isnt back for boom boom bass))

boom ba doom boom boom bass ♪ boom ba doom boom boom bass~

this is what shotaro heard echoing throughout the apartment when he came home from promotions that day. riize recently released a new music video, boom boom bass. you were a briize as much as you were his baby, so you were there for the music video premieres, and you asked shotaro to get a few albums for you to open!

he opened the door to the bedroom, and he saw you jumping on the bed, dressed in sunglasses with a hairbrush in your hand as a makeshift microphone. the tv that was against the wall was playing the music video, him and his members dancing across the screen.

"woah baby, you're gonna steal my job! my little dancer!" he said, ruffling your hair.

"hi taro!!!!!!"

you jumped into his arms, onto the floor so the two of you could dance together! he knew all the moves, you knew all the words, it was perfect!

once you restarted the song a few more times, you found yourself worn out.

————— ୨୧ —————

the following day, shotaro found you watching youtube on your ipad in the living room. he immediately recognized the video as a boom boom bass performance (duh, its his song!) he joins you on the couch, puts an arm around your shoulder, and kisses your head.

"taro!" you give him a kiss, "hehe, you look so cool in this video!"

"you know it! only the coolest performance for you pretty baby. there are only a few more promotions left, you should come watch soon!"

the two of you discussed tagging along with him, and it sounded like a set plan!

it was all you could talk about for the next day or two.

"taro, what outfit will you wear?"

"taro, what if you forget the dance moves?"

"taro, will they have snacks?"

he was just as excited, since you were his biggest motivation, inspiration, and supporter.

"i dont know yet baby. i'll find out the day of."

"you know, im too good of a dancer to forget!"

"i'll make sure they have all your favorites. i'll also make sure anton doesn't eat them all."

shotaro thought it was absolutely adorable. the way you'd be regressed so much, yet you would still ask to watch riize's comeback performances, behind the scenes, and of course the music video. and he would put them on every time! he would also find you in your room looking through the photobook of the album, or sometimes he'd catch you singing boom boom bass while playing or coloring.

the night before the performance you were going to watch, you could hardly sleep!

"my love, i know you're super excited. i am too, but you gotta sleep! we have a long day ahead of us. look! all your stuffies are already sleeping."

your taro was right.. you should probably head to bed.

————— ୨୧ —————

finally the day has come! you were going to watch riize perform boom boom bass! you put on your coolest looking outfit, paired with a cute headband, and of course, the matching bracelet you and shotaro had. you also accessorized with a photocard of taro, one you pulled from the album all on your own!

speaking of taro, he was currently texting one of his members.

sohee ✌️: you're bringing the baby right??

yeah shes coming with, shes actually really excited to see you and the guys

sohee ✌️: good good, what snacks does she want? i'll let staff know!

he responded with a few of your favorite snacks and a drink you enjoyed.

"i am so excited!!" you could barely stay still since the moment you woke up.

you held his hand the whole way backstage, and when you saw the other riize members, it was safe to say you were a little starstruck. after all, it has been a few months since you've last seen them, in person of course. other than that, the only way you've seen the members was from the same perspective as every other briize!

you hid behind shotaro, wrapping yourself around him. you didn't realize how scary this would be!

"sorry guys, shes being a bit shy! oh look pretty, eunseok has a snack for you."

you peek out from behind his back, and see eunseok holding out one of your favorite snacks!

"go ahead baby, i'll be right behind you."

you quickly grabbed the package from him, and ran right back to shotaro. hiding your face from everyone while you opened the bag.

"what do you say? use your manners please."

oh right, you don't want taro mad at you for not using your manners! quickly you turned back around to face eunseok.

"thank you eunseok.." you softly said. you were already eating some of the snack so your words were hardly even heard! but it seemed like he understood since he gave you a big smile!

"could i have a bite? please?" a black haired boy said from the side.

you recognized him as seunghan and he was holding out his hand in front of you. you looked back at shotaro, and he gave you a nod of approval. placing a piece in his hand, he replied with a quick "thank you"

some more interactions with the other members were shared, and it was time for them to head on stage. you stayed back, watching from a tv screen since you and shotaro weren't comfortable with you out in the crowd. the performance started, and it was like shotaro wad the only one on stage. his presence and voice were so beautiful, how was he even real!

the performance lasted shorter than you wanted, but the boys were back in the room with you faster than you expected! shotaro scooped you up and brought you to a couch in the corner, placing you on his lap.

"how'd i do? who was the coolest one there baby?"

"of course you taro!! thank you for letting me come." you put your arms around him, your face snuggled tightly in his neck.

"no problem pretty girl. lets head back soon so we can cuddle?"

after dinner, a shower, and another boom boom bass dance party, both of you were tucked in bed. you rambled on and on about how special today was, and how special shotaro was to you. he rubbed circles around your back, trying to get you to fall asleep. once you got everything off your mind you were out like a light. today was long for you, but it was more than okay because taro was there with you. and he'll be there whenever you need him to be.

author note: ok 1 ｡ﾟ(ﾟ´Д｀ﾟ)ﾟ｡ this was not proofread so pls ignore any errors! 2 this was written for my sweetie vix i love her guys (⌒▽⌒) i tried my best to write something really good, so i hope it lives up to your expectations! i wanted to come up with a better plot but its already been so long since you sent this in and i didnt wanna keep u waiting!!!i also enjoy writing cg!shotaro i think hes so amazing. also boomboom bass has been stuck in my head since it came out... (^^)

as always, feedback is always appreciated 💕

[davidthephoneguy]

Welcome to the Ghost Pals au!

So we got some goofy guys here, Time to meet the main cast now that it’s actually my birthday!

Apologies for the technical difficulties before

…….

Just give them a minute the need to get their costume change ready

Ok they’re ready now! Step through the curtain dudes! :D

First up is a new face! Please make her feel welcome :3

Key’s is the dayshift the dayshift employee, taking the place of Jack. She is based off the Australian finger lime which has a caviar looking inside as well as a spiked point on the end, both elements worked into her design.

She actually quite likes performing with the animatronics due to her enjoyment of music. Key’s seemingly doesn’t like talking about her life outside of Freddys or her past to anyone. I wonder what it is.

Key’s doesn’t particularly love Freddys but did used to go there as kid. She is mostly just there for the paycheck, little does she know about how Freddy’s pays their employees.

Oh dear she found out… I’m sure it’ll be fine as long as she didn’t sign the contract- hm looks like she did oh well.

On to the next goober, a classic!

Look its the sad wet cat

David’s the assistant manager for the location, he’s been moved from location to location due to causing accidents for all his previous managers. He’s on his last warning so let’s hope theres no issues this time ;)

Onto the next character in the walls of Freddys

Wowzas look at this lil chaotic kidoo

Jannette came to Freddys on her birthday but got mixed up and joined another certain party group. She became one of the children in the missing kids incident however she has no memory of the event which is probably for the best, I dont think she needs that on her mind.

She haunts the kids cove and creates it into her world of play, quite literally at times.

She plays games and tricks with another being in the restaurant.

And look theres the other being!

The ghost phone cat is back again!

Stevm’s comfy outfit was made through him mix and matching clothes.

He doesn’t think fully alot of the time and tries to just have fun similar to Jannettes attitude with a lack of moral compass. Stevm also has memory issues due to a combination of the phone ai when he was alive and the perception of time in the flipside.

Stevm is rather chaotic neutral and haunts the arcade, he likes pulling pranks and spooking people for the fun of it.

The whole things takes place in 1999 and I can clarify any related dates as I have some headcanoned ones that I dont think are the same as the canon. Except the missing kids incident, that still takes place in 1985.

Well thats the main cast! I hope you like them so far, been workin hard on em and making them work together.

The storyline will be a mix of text posts and images but you all are welcome to interact with them (most likely non canonically)

I’ll reveal more as things go on :3

[neon-kazoo]

Helloo I love your work I wanna just munch on it every time you post >:)

I have a request but you totally dont have to do it I bet your probably busy with others anyway lol

If you could could you do a scenario where the Hero gets pretty sick and cant go out, but they have a public reputation they need to hold on to. And the Villain owes Hero for saving them once so they have to go out and impersonate the Hero? And they start to realize how hard and miserable the Hero has to work after saving somebody? Tyy :D sorry if to specific lol

(Hey! Thank you for the request, it’s my first and I’m flattered! Hope you like it <3)

Calling In Sick

A faint jiggling could be heard from inside their desk. Villain sighed, hanging their head for a moment before opening the drawer and answering the call.

“I’m not interested in purchasing an extended warranty-” they began, only to be cut off by a familiar voice.

“It’s Hero, dummy.”

Villain pulled the phone away from their ear to glance at the number on the screen.

“How did you get this number?”

“That’s not important,” Hero spoke hurriedly, “What is important, is that I need you to be me for today.”

“You need me to be what now?” Villain questioned, raising their eyebrow in a show of confusion, despite being completely alone in their office.

“It’s simple, you just have to put on the costume-”

“Why would I do that?” the villain asked incredulously.

“Because I’m sick!”

Hero coughed pitifully for emphasis.

“Surely you have someone else you can call,” Villain replied, dumbfounded.

Was this a joke?

“Not on such short notice. Please, Villain, I have a reputation to uphold.”

“Why would I care about your sterling reputation?” Villain laughed.

They were a villain, after all. Their entire role consisted of making the hero look bad.

A sniffle and sigh traveled through the speakers before Hero spoke again.

“You remember the City Tower?”

Of course Villain remembered the City Tower. They remembered the blaring of a horn, a hard shove on their shoulder, and the burning of skin against pavement.

How could they forget when Hero saved their life and never let them live it down since?

“Ugh! Seriously?! You push me out of oncoming traffic once-“

“Twice, actually.”

“What do you mean ‘twice’-”

“City park?”

Damn it. The pond incident.

“Fine! I’ll put on your stupid costume,” Villain grumbled.

A little impersonation was nothing compared to saving a life. Plus, if they really thought about it, the villain supposed the deception of the act was villainous enough to justify partaking in.

“Great! I’ll text you where to pick it up,” Hero informed them cheerfully before promptly hanging up.

A chime and a buzz came through the phone a moment later, and Villain gathered their things and headed for the door.

One finicky zipper and some shimmying later, and Villain was passable as the city’s golden savior.

Now what?

They wandered around town aimlessly for a while, getting a multitude of strange looks from citizens going about their day. They froze when they heard sirens whooping around the corner, before they realized that they were currently residing on the right side of the law.

Right. Think like a hero.

First order of business, save some people.

The spotted the red and blue lights, breaking into a sprint to follow them around a corner. They arrived at a building a few blocks later, and walked in just as a perimeter was being set.

“Hero! Thank God you’re here! My baby, he’s still up there!” A woman cried, pointing up to a balcony that appeared to be on the verge of collapse.

A boy hung off the side of it, feet kicking to try and find a grip on the wall.

Villain took off running towards the building, climbing three flights of stairs before they realized they hadn’t stopped to count what floor the boy was stuck on. They quickly located the nearest window and kicked out the screen, ducking their head out and looking down then up.

There, two floors directly above them dangled the kid, and it looked like he was loosing his grip.

His fingers slipped away, but Villain was ready. They braced their legs against the wall and leaned out as far as they could. As the child dropped, Villain caught hold of his forearm, stopping his momentum and allowing Villain to pull him inside to safety. The boy was crying, probably a product of the terror of falling combined with the shoulder that had just been wrenched from its socket.

“You’re okay, I’ve got you. It’s okay,” the villain-turned-hero repeated in a whisper as they carried the boy down the stairs and past the (too-late) emergency personnel that had flooded the building.

Stepping outside, Villain easily located the hysterical mother and making a beeline for her. The second she saw them coming, she burst into tears and broke out into a run.

Villain handed over the kid they had cradled in their arms to the woman who reached them at record speed.

Relief washed over the mother’s face while she looked over her son. She pushed his hair back behind his ear, whispering to him how worried she was and how glad she was to have him back on ground level.

Something changed when she saw his arm, however. Fury overtook her features as she realized that an injury had been sustained by the boy during the ordeal.

“You let my baby break his arm?!” She screeched, whipping her head back to the temporary hero.

“It’s not broken, ma’am,” they started to explain, “it’s just dislocated-“

“I’m going to be telling the news about this!” She spit, turning towards the ambulances on the perimeter and marching away with a huff.

“Absolutely unacceptable!” The villain could hear her yell as she walked away, injured-but-alive child in tow.

“I had no idea this profession was so thankless,” Villain murmured under their breath.

It wasn’t until they had to fight past the sea of cameras and wall of reporters shouting questions (that really sounded more like accusations) that Villain realized just how idealized they’d viewed the job of hero. There clearly was no simple fame and glory to be earned here. From what Villain could tell, it was mostly ridicule and media coverage masquerading as a reward for their heroism.

And no sick days?

Hero must be truly miserable.

If Villain was a little easier on Hero after that day, then nobody was any the wiser.

[dyke-pollinator]

This is a bit of a personal question so if you don’t want to answer I understand if you just delete this ask but

As a relatively younger trans woman, and especially new to actually exploring my sexuality…at what point do I feel like a lesbian? Like I always feel bad or weird for being attracted to lesbians. It always feels wrong or amoral or like I’m lying in some way idk

I apologize for taking a few days to answer this my dear anon. A combination of Pride and IRL stuff has left me exhausted and I wanted to make sure I really took the time to give you a good answer and my bad for the wall of text you're about to receive lol.

There's a lot I could say about this. For the sake of this post, I'm going to assume that by "younger" you mean both in your transition and your age. Transition is hard. Finding yourself is hard. To answer your question, it takes Time. And I mean this in two specific ways:

Transition is a slow process. As you continue your transition, (whatever that means to you, whether that be social, medical, both, or neither, or something else entirely) you'll find a lot of things just making more sense. The labels might slowly start to be more comfortable. Or maybe they wont, and you'll switch to new ones, but that deeper sense of understanding yourself doesn't really go away (trust me I've changed both my labels and pronouns multiple times now lol). Either way, despite anything else, over time you'll just start to feel more at home, both in your body, and how you present yourself to the world. Now this is both the scary part and the hard part: you have to take steps to find a community who accepts you as you are, and (ideally) with people like you. Yeah this requires you to put yourself out there in a way that will be uncomfortable at first. Yeah, sometimes its going to go poorly, and you'll be rejected, or shunned. And yes, it will take its toll on you mentally, emotionally and (sometimes) physically. Its worth it. Having those people in your life does more than you can know in learning how to love and accept yourself. Having people look you in the eye and tell you that they love you, they see you, you're valid in who you are, no matter what anyone else says, is just so crucial.

You just get older. I know for a lot of people that can be frightening (and like, yeah, sometimes), but I can tell you with full confidence, I LOVE being in my 30s. You couldn't pay me to go back to 20. Your teen years and 20s are fucking hard. You just get so much better at knowing which things to give a shit about in your life and you get the necessary resources to be able to not give a shit. Most days I feel like a lesbian (more of a Dyke but w/e), so I am one, no one can take that from me, and the people who dont like me using that label can fuck off. I wear more masc clothes and have more masc hobbies because I want to and that doesn't define my gender or sexuality. I like doing mutual aid projects, and working on honing my DIY skills. I love the people who are in my life and tell them unapologetically, and I appreciate every day I get to spend with them. As I get older, the more I feel like "me" and the more I learn that in reality, I do love that person. She's actually pretty great.

I hope you can trust me that it gets better. That, in spite of all the pain, all of the heartbreak, the loss and tribulations, its fucking worth it. I know I didn't think so for a long, long time. But my god I am so happy I made it here. You'll get to that point to.

[tangyangie]

Hii! Honestly thank you for all your works!, they’re so good and feel so accurate, you embody the characters so well😫‼️.

I dont know if ur taking requests right now but i was wondering if you could do a karma x enfp reader head-cannons? I saw you did an isfp one, idk if you’ve done any other, but Thats alright if not of course!

Reader is really bubbly and loud, she makes alotta dirty and crude jokes with Rio and similarly, she has good grades she just doesnt try. She’s girly (loves being feminine) but that doesnt stop her from getting dirty, Shes very much a hopeless romantic and goes feral for some loving.

— 𝐊𝐀𝐑𝐌𝐀 𝐗 𝐄𝐍𝐅𝐏 𝐑𝐄𝐀𝐃𝐄𝐑 ⊹

desc. karma x enfp!fem!reader, who's loud, playful, and talkative, yet stubborn, smart, and romantic.

notes. i'm preeeetty sure i'm an enfp (or infp), so a lot of these traits reminded me of myself!! so, this one was pretty easy to write, and i hope you like it!!

he's drawn to you from the beginning.

you're funny and joke about everything with him. oh, someone fell out of a tree? oops, you guys are literally on the floor.

you guys never have a dull moment. you always have something to talk about, and your conversations usually end up lasting hours.

physical touch is biggg for you guys. it's rare to see you guys not hugging or being close in some way.

he loves your outfits. no matter what you wear, though, he will be completely infatuated by you but he does like seeing you in dresses.

he picks you up a lot. piggy-back rides, carrying you bridal style, over the shoulder... any way that your feet aren't touching the ground.

you guys bounce around a lot. like, people mistake you as children for how energetic you guys are—you're constantly running around places.

you guys are constantly texting. it's kind of funny how much battery is wasted, even though you two are in the same room.

you guys also play gamepigeon a lot together. you've both gotten really good at the word games, and you're constantly competing. your screen is lit up like a christmas tree because of just how much you guys play together.

karma and you are both stubborn, and so you guys are like a rainbow brick wall with bubble guns at the top. it's the most accurate description of your personalities together that i can give.

when it comes to school, you guys are one and the same. you've got good grades and stuff, but you do not pay attention.

you will have an assignment that was given at the beginning of the week, and you're finishing it literally morning of. and then you get a perfect score.

you guys spend a lot of time outside together. whether that's looking for cats in sidewalks, going to playgrounds and parks, or finding a lake and skipping rocks together. you guys definitely feed the ducks, too.

you kiss him a lot. he definitely doesn't mind—he welcomes it. while, of course, throwing in a few teasing phrases.

you guys make a lot of dirty jokes together. it's crazy you guys haven't been reported to the police for the amounts of looks you guys have gotten.

you guys collect stuff for each other. you collect stamps and he collects rocks, so you guys trade each other stuff. if someone doesn't have enough to trade, you pay in affection.

you guys climb on stuff a lot. it's a normal occurrence to see you guys on the roof or hanging off a window of a 6-floor tall apartment building.

notes: every time i write these i get reminded of my nonexistent social life 🫶

also i'm so sorry for taking so long ☹️ been feeling v unmotivated to write but i did see the spider-man movie so i'm feeling much better (and in love w miles oh m y god)

[queenoftheworldisdead]

Off Schedule

Chapter 8

Note: knocking the rust of my writing. send me a note if something is weird. i dont bite

Summary: Your boss is going through a divorce, but it seems you are the last to know. Emotions flare between you, your boss and his business partner. What will you do?

Warning: 18 + only, slow burn, fluff, balance of power dynamic

Brad Pitt x Reader, Keanu Reeves x Reader

Chapter 1, Chapter 2, Chapter 3, Chapter 4, Chapter 5, Chapter 6, Chapter 7

💐

Jen looked gorgeous. Her baby bump fully present almost stealing the show while the happy couple took their vows.

Despite the joyous atmosphere you sat uncomfortably in the wedding venue, but hopefully hid it well. It was hard to forget consequences of your action, especially when facing the ex-wife, surrounded by her loves. You felt like an interloper, you shouldn’t be here. You were more surprised you hadn’t burst into flames in the pew.

Brad wasn’t here thank god. You hadn’t seen him since that night and thanks to your hiatus from work you wouldn’t be forced to.

“You may now kiss the bride,” the officiant announced proudly as the attendees erupted in cheers and applause. You joined in the pageantry as guilt continued to eat-away at you. Only a few more hours of this before you were free to go home a wallow in the shame of your mistakes.

💐

The short walk to the reception was magical. Behind the venue guests were led down a dirt path. White flower pillars wrapped in fairy lights highlighted the trail leading to a white massive outdoor tent.

The strong scent of flowers wafted out from the opening of the tent. The inside was just a gorgeous as the outside. Flowers draped the ceiling and walls while large center pieces overflowed with blush grapes and pale flowers.

The room boomed with music while the liquor flowed freely. You would be abstaining too scared to make another drunken mistake.

There were too many tables, finding your seat was becoming a challenge. The place cards written in golden calligraphy were beautiful, but hard to read off the stark white background. You squinted, leaning toward each card trying to make out the characters.

“Do you need any help?”

You felt the gentle touch on your shoulder before his soft words hit your ears. Keanu hid his chuckle from the sight of your startled face.

“Oh hi… I didn’t know you were coming. I didn’t see you during the ceremony.”

“I just got back, I tried getting a hold of you, but never got an answer.” He explained.

You frowned in confusion. You hadn’t had any messages from him. Your phone was working you were sure. Sarah and Zoe both had texted you just yesterday.

“Something must be wrong with my phone… I never-,“ You tried to explain as you dug out your phone and quickly scan through your messages. Nothing.

Not even older messages from him. Weird.

He stands beside you watching over your shoulder as you tried to figure this out. You search his name in your contacts and its there, but when you click on it your stunned to find out that he is blocked.

“I don’t know how this happened. I swear I didn’t.” You plead your innocence with wide eyes. The way he looked at you somehow you knew he believed you to your relief.

“No worries these phones are always doing something crazy, it might have to do with a software update.” He suggested. That had to be the case. You’d seen notifications to update before, but always ignored them so that might be why.

“Weird. Of all people. I would’ve preferred if it blocked my mom instead.” You joked.

“That’s a relief I thought you might be avoiding me.”

💐

Keanu led and you followed as he helped you find your seat. He was the only face you recognized and you hoped that his placement was close to your own.

“I think this is us.” He proclaimed picking up two placards holding them side by side. You could kiss Jen for this.

“So how are things at the office?” You enquired as he pulled out your seat.

“It’s been busy, but your absence has been felt. Do you miss it?”

“I'm actually thinking about quitting.” You confessed sheepishly.

“Really?" Surprise and confusion riddled his face. You felt bad, but it was a thought that had been plaguing you for a while. Things at Terrilum were overly messy and you weren’t sure how much worse it was going to get. You needed peace and stability and you were sure you wouldn’t find it there.

“Yeah I’ve just been there for so long and I think its time.” You squirmed a little in your seat. You avoided his looks of concern and focused on the happy people dancing on the dance floor. Your mood was coming down just thinking the of bizarre soap opera you found yourself in and you wished desperately to escape that.

“Well I’m sorry to see you go. If you need a reference I would be happy to help.” Keanu offered. He still looked a bit disappointed, but he wasn’t going to press it seemed. You were thankful for that.

“Thanks, I’ll most definitely take you up on that.”

“Um-mm well while I have you here..” Keanu started but hesitated. You felt the familiar bundle of nerves tightening you belly as you wait in anticipation.

“I hope you don’t mind, but since you were unable to read my messages before, I was wondering if I could ask you in person again.”

“Ask me what?” You asked on the edge of your seat.

“If you wouldn’t mind... I'd like to take you on a date? A real one this time.”

💐

You blinked dumbly at him. For how long you weren’t sure. The question had caught you off guard.

“I’m sorry if I made you uncomfortable…Umm I’m sorry I just thought.” He hurried to apologize, but you were quick to stop him.

“Wait! Wait!” You blurted out excitedly, holding your hands up haltingly. “Sorry,” you began lowering your hands and your voice in an attempt to sound more demur. “I’m mean I would love to.”

“That’s a relief.” He said with a grin, clearly entertained by your theatrics. “I’m ashamed to admit I’ve had a bit of a crush on you for a while, but never really had the courage to speak up.”

“Really?”

The news was unbelievable. It felt like you were in a dream that you didn’t want to wake up from.

The joy was short lived though. Your smile faded slowly when you spot a dark cloud in the horizon. The sight of him melts away the new found happiness and slamed you back down to the cold reality.

Brad. You thought he wasn’t coming. You hadn’t seen him during the ceremony either. Keanu followed your line of sight to find his friend and business partner.

Brad hadn’t spotted you both yet, that was good at least. Too busy congratulating the happy couple. Keanu waved over his buddy to your horror. An overwhelming urge to escape on coming doom enveloped your body. You needed to get out of here and fast.

“Um. Sorry… I just realized it’s getting late.” You lied, fumbling through your bag blindly, desperate to find your phone. You needed to order a hire car and get out of here.

“They haven’t cut the cake yet. Stay for a bit and I’ll take you home.” Keanu offered as he turned his attention back to you. Warmth bloomed on your exposed leg when he touched you there. His touch was comforting and you wanted to soak in it.

He was sweet, but you couldn’t take the chance of facing them both.

You smiled tightly disguising your discomfort the best you can. By the look on his face you could tell he wasn’t going to take no for an answer.

You sneak a glance in Brad’s direction. He seemed to be getting closer. Damn it. You felt trapped and needed to escape.

“Um ok you’re right, but um I’m gonna go to the ladies I’ll be right back.” You lied pointing a thumb in the direction of your escape. He didn’t get up when you shot to your feet. Keanu just nodded in understanding and you’re grateful when he wouldn't follow suit.

You didn’t look back. There were no bathrooms in the direction you were headed, only catering. The only restrooms were back at the main venue, and to go there you would have to pass by you know who.

Clumsily you slip through the catering door. The faint scent of cigarette smoke caught your nose and you followed it. If they are smoking then there is a back door somewhere.

The staff looked at you confused, but say nothing. Ignoring the stares you ordered the fastest option for hire car despite the price.

Damn it. The next ride was twenty minutes away.

💐💐💐💐💐

[stupidrant]

i'm gonna be honest here, i just want to let it out there that i don't think it's entirely fair to judge thrud so harshly for being a product of her enviroment or her mistakes :( i can also point fingers at atreus for his poor decision making and acting out, but that would be stupid to do because he is after all a 14 year old kid. thrud is approximately same age as atreus and angrboda.

and i just realized just like jotunheim was angrboda's whole life and not being able to meet people her age, that's how it was for thrud while growing up in a toxic asgardian home with weird & down right mean family members. like whatever bullshit she saw and heard, all of it was a norm to her. we might not care, but the truth is that asgard was her entire world. her dad, however broken and unstable, was her entire world and wanted him to be better. and i would have had a problem if both dealt with their problems the same way or they were the same characters who showed grace, i greatly prefer them being on different ends of the spectrums so there's more room to develop their traits and arcs.

from thrud and sif's ending dialogues when they were sitting by the fire - i am sure that this is a kid who is going to shake off the ideology and propaganda they were raised with. she has to. because asgard is gone and she has to face reality in the other realms. and i don't doubt that sif the diplomat is going to keep her in check too!

(i am very sorry for the walls of text in your askbox but i find these discussions so fascinating and healthy, anyways i hope you're having a good day and what song are you listening to these days 💙💙💙 me personally i am in love with cowboy carter these days UGH I LOVE THE SONG TYRANT)

Im sure you know this anon but to anyone who might think otherwise i dont hate thrud so pls dont think that and i dont intend to start anything 😭 i agree she isnt a product of her family and i dont really put anything against her as she's just a kid hence why i think the most likely path she'd go is a self-reflection one rather than a self-deprecating one. Having differences is how atreus became friends with her, angrboda and skjoldr so heres to hoping for her and angie to be atleast acquaintances!

some additional comments about this too: i think the responses to thrud's character isnt completely because of her per-say, but more so because of the "fandom" (outside of here) and how she has a lot of weirdos on her (which isnt her fault either, shes just a character at the end of the day and a lot of those people do too much and it comes off as very disingenuous) and i think as time goes on, more people are gonna see through this and be a little turned off on her which is unfortunate because it should never be that serious and im not gonna let those people override my liking for her, im just pointing out how i see things and how dudebros fuck everything up in their paths. (since the year started i've been listening to more slower tempo songs tbh and i dont have any current favorites atm so imma just say sade - kiss of life for now lol)

[sxtvrns]

pre-release benefits

🎶 now playing: kiss - nct dojaejung

P: Choi Soobin x Fem!Idol!Reader

S: A collaboration announced with a dear friend of yours seems to go down the one path you didn’t expect. You weren’t complaining.

C: LOTS of tension, soobin duality, fluff, y/n in denial, kinda dirty makeout scene, rushed, soobin a lil ooc?

N: i wanted to start writing something new so bad but im running out of plot ideas send help UNTIL i remembered i had a soobin thing in my drafts that absolutely sucked ass so i deleted it and this is… im hoping this one is better and i dont delete it this time <3

view the full perfume collection.

please interact if you enjoy!

Everyone knew you and Soobin were best friends. The closest. You shared everything with each other. Someone told you a secret that you weren’t supposed to tell anyone? You immediately go tell Soobin. He gets very much classified information regarding the release of their new album? He goes and tells you.

See, you two were good at keeping each other’s secrets. You were 90% sure Soobin has blackmail on almost every single popular group in the industry at this point.

What led you two to be this close in the first place? Well, you were a producer and a music artist yourself under Big Hit. You helped produce some of their music, recorded them in the studio, and assisted in releasing some of their greatest hits.

Soobin took a liking to you, and your nice but strong constructive criticism. You let them have their freedom but in a way that the song would sound exactly how you wanted it to come out. The more he ran into you, the more you talked. The more you talked, the closer you became. The closer you became, the more you began to see each other as friends.

And that’s how it all started. Soobin saw himself lucky since he didn’t share a room with anyone, meaning no one had to hear him laugh or giggle under his covers whenever you texted him something humorous. Unless his groupmates hear him through the walls, they haven’t given him any noise complaints.

You didn’t perform on music shows often, so being seen on the big screen by fans sometimes came as a surprise. You were more laid back than elaborate, but still enticing and entertaining, which is why people loved you so much. You were the perfect balance of talent and performer, enthusiasm and technique.

Since you were always in the studio, assisting with editing and recording after your own promotions and such, you didn’t really have the time to attend shows even if you ended up winning. But your workload begun to slowdown since it was promotion season, meaning you had time to work on projects of your own and your own wellbeing.

You met up with your manager in their office regarding your next comeback. “Bang wants you to do a collaborative album. All the songs have features.”

“With more than one artist?”

“Just one. He’s suggesting Soobin, since he, quote: ‘notices their chemistry in the studio and how well their voices blend together’. He’s endorsing it since he knows your close friendship with each other as well.”

“Isn’t Soobin still on tour? He’s gonna be tired once he gets back.”

“After or during his days off, he’ll work with you.”

“I don’t wanna overwork him…”

“The boy will do anything for you, Y/N. But yeah, check up on him every once in a while.”

You ponder for a moment, silently agreeing. “Does he know?”

“I emailed his manager, so I’m assuming so. Could’ve been with anyone else under HYBE, but we listen to the man.” The man being Producer Bang. He wasn’t entirely wrong. You two worked extremely well together, Soobin somehow being able to tolerate your nitpicking, and you figured that working with someone you were already familiar with would make the process more enjoyable.

Your phone buzzed, revealing a notification from Soobin himself.

my manager said we’re collaborating???

i mean… do u want to?

isn’t this an idea we’ve been having for a while

okay i thought you were joking when you said that

this is a legitimate thing? not a prank

no its not a prank

lets do it by the time i step foot in korea i will be sprinting to your studio

u need to REST my guy ur literally on tour and travelling 24/7

i am holding onto the opportunity for the rest of this trip u better not be contacting anyone else

wasn’t planning to 👍

You showed your manager the brief conversation, hearing the clicking of their keyboard right after. “I suggest you start brainstorming. They want it published by the beginning of next year.” You can see there’s something more behind their expression that they aren’t telling you, but you don’t pry. “Are they suggesting a concept?”

“You haven’t done a sexy concept yet.”

“A sexy concept. With Soobin.” Your managed nods. “Are you not seeing the setbacks here? You’re setting me up, aren���t you?”

“Do something you haven’t done before! Step out of your comfort zone; I’ve heard your demos, Y/N. Don’t tell me they don’t give you the urge to make out with someone.”

“You are so unprofessional.”

“As unprofessional as you.”

“I’m not fit for sexy, Jung-Hwa. Have you seen me?”

“I’m seeing you right now. I see the potential if you just put yourself out there. Isn’t that what everyone’s into these days?”

“Only if it’s executed well.”

“And you don’t settle for less, so get to work. Work off your demos; edit them, compose, do whatever you need to. I know there’s a fire inside consisting of your desires that just hasn’t been lit yet.”

“You’re a madman but you just gave me an idea.”

“Don’t say I didn’t help you!” They yell as you leave the room.

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

Soobin listened to the edited demos you sent him over and over again. It was like an entire album of Tinnitus back to back, and God, it was so good. No wonder why you forced yourself to sit in during the recording for that song.

Y/NNN

soobinnn

ITS SO GOOD

IM ASCENDING

I CANT WAIT TO COME BACK AND RECORD THIS WITH YOU

what was the concept for this???

sexy

…

…what

dont kill me my manager told me to

y/n…

are you trying to make moves on me with ur music

cuz honestly thats the hottest fucking thing ever

what the fuck

im working off old demos i had

should i add more

were you horny while making these

these sound like actual songs you’d have sex to

you are the most unprofessional person i have ever met in my life

i am speaking to you as a friend

assuming i like u thru my music does not sound very friend like 🤨

i didnt wanna do the sexy concept either okay i am not suitable for the role

y/n ur hot and u make music that is the sexiest thing that a person could ever do

im collabing with someone else

is it because u saw me shirtless while doing tinnitus

did that get u into a mood and you started writing these songs

ur actually obsessed with me its insane

soobin are you drunk?

what

i have taehyun’s live up rn i can hear you in the background

ur music got me acting up

oh my god ur horny for me thats crazyyy

only for you

woah

lets calm down a little here

dont want u saying things ur gonna regret

im completely sober

i can see u looking at ur phone in disgust rn

is that what ur doing

yes

how tf did u know

i always know

you’re so predictable its honestly adorable

okay maybe you should get some rest

ur enjoying this i bet

i am tired and do not have enough energy to keep up with this

goodnight stupid

goodnight cutie

never call me that again

cutie

choi soobin go to sleep or im gonna do this album with someone else

u wouldnt

ill ask yeonjun

goodnight y/n

Soobin had to admit, you were cute. Scratch that, you were fucking sexy in his eyes.

Your maturity, your art, your precision, God, he was obsessed with you. He always jokes about it when talking to you, but the fact he does it so often sometimes makes you think that he does actually have some sort of attraction to you.

You didn’t mean to insinuate some sort of move on him during your songwriting, but he was making it really damn hard in making it seem like you were. This tour was really getting to him. He might be going a little insane.

He did have a point, though. All of your songs were a little… erotic. The way he was texting you was not helping.

He was driving you crazy. Flirting with you while you had no knowledge if he meant what he said at all. And the only time you could ever check in with him or he could check in with you was after his concerts, meaning he was exhausted and ready to hit the sheets when you were ready to talk business plans.

You envied those at his concerts. You planned to go to the one in Korea, but tickets were sold out and you ended up being busy that day anyways. Soobin wanted to see you there too. He wondered if you’ve seen those pictures of him showing his abs off to the audience. Given you spend so much time on the internet, you probably have.

One day of rest was enough for him already. Every night he went back to his hotel room he was always reminded that he had to record with you by the time they stopped back in Korea for their temporary break after the first part of their tour. Maybe it was the relaxing environment, or his earbuds, or the freshly made bed, but something always kept him eager for your collaboration.

He texted you every single night, as he usually did, jokingly flirting and saying how much better it would’ve been if you were there, or how you should’ve been a guest performer out of nowhere. But he always gushed about how much he loved your music before anything else.

The minute he stepped foot into the airport, he immediately thought of you, and how you’d execute the album’s production perfectly, in a way that both of you would be proud of. He just couldn’t wait to see you in the studio again.

y/nnie

hello soobin

i’ll be in the studio tomorrow

already? i just finished making the instrumentals LOL

ive been looking forward to this ever since i came back

you know how much i love doing these things with you

you made that sound way more dirty than it should’ve been

maybe you’re just dirty minded

do you want to record or not

i’ll be there at 10 sharp ma’am

He wasn’t lying. When you saw him seated outside the recording booth with an ice americano, you merely stood there and stared at him until he noticed. When he finally did, his eyes lit up and he nearly dropped his drink, jumping up from his seat to hug you.

“How was your tour?”

“It was really fun! Wish you’d been there for at least one of the dates. How did you manage to miss both of them?”

“Shut up, I’m busy.”

“Busy making demos for songs to have sex to?”

“You are so unprofessional. How do people love you so much?”

“Because I’m charming and very handsome.”

You scoff. “Yeah. Charming, for sure.”

“You’ll fall for my charms eventually, Y/N.”

“Just get in the booth.” You part ways as he obliges, meeting him separated by glass in the control room. “I’ve coloured your parts green and mine blue.”

“Why couldn’t I be blue?”

“Why does it matter to you? Should I play you the demo or have you listened to it 500 times already that I don’t need to?” Sarcasm drips off your tongue and pierces Soobin with your stare, waiting for his answer. “I got it, princess, don’t worry.”

You know he’s mocking you with that nickname. Then how come your heart fluttered at the sound of it?

God, you were lucky that you never called Yeonjun to replace him. You never wanted to in the first place. You knew he’d fit the concept having done it before, you just never thought he’d fit it that well. His voice blended so well and it fit the vibe you were going for. The hour long session passed by like minutes.

“Love it, love it, love it!” You cheer giddily with small claps. “I’ll go in now, switch with me.” You take your headphones off, leaving the control room. Soobin meets you outside the booth, his glance lasting longer than it should have.

Recording your parts took a few tries with the excuse of ‘messing up’ when you knew damn well you wouldn’t mess up your own song. You were too focused on Soobin’s voice that you forgot to come in at times; it was hypnotizing, siren like that it had you so distracted.

His stare was not helping.

“Again.” You groan.

“It sounded fine to me.”

“Everything sounds fine to you, Soobin.”

“I think you can trust my opinion. Play it back for her.” He tells the supervisor in the control room. That underlying nauseating feeling when you hear your own voice bites at you like a hawk, but it only lasts for a second as you tell yourself that listening to your voice is how you keep a roof over your head.

After the section finishes playing, you bite your finger, hating to agree that he was right. “So?” Soobin looks at you with an all-knowing stare, a sure smile on his face. “It’s good.” You mutter. “What was that, hon?”

“It’s good.” You sneer. “Now can we finish recording this? We’re almost done.” You hear Soobin chuckle in your hear but pay no mind to it, though you could feel your face heating up by the second.

You go back to the control room and listen over it, satisfied with the results and saving your work to come back to later.

“Y/N.”

“Hm?”

“Come eat with me.”

You tilt your head. “What’s with the sudden offer? Are you making moves on me?”

“Thought you might be hungry. You’ve been surviving on an iced caramel macchiato and a single triangle gimbap this entire day and I know you’re notorious for overworking yourself without any fuel.” Is this his way of saying he cares about you? “Aw, so you do care about me and aren’t just a horny fuck.”

“Compassion before the passion.”

“That was the worse attempt at poetry I’ve ever heard in my life, and I’ve heard a lot of things.”

Of course, the joke about him being horny wasn’t entirely true. He just seemed to be all over you and flirty so often that led you to make such an accusation against him. You’d get weird stares when you called him that in public or around other people, but it was a revolving inside joke between you two that both of you took pride in.

“I’ll go. Because yes, I’m starving, and two, I did not work hours on these demos just for me to fuck up what’s gonna be released to the public.”

“So it’s a date?”

“I’d rather get a black ocean than go on a date with you.” He stares at you, waiting for an answer as your stomach rumbles. “Okay, fine, call it whatever you want because I’m so fucking hungry right now so wherever you’re taking me better be good.” He smiles and continues walking.

“Y/N’s first date.”

“I’m calling Yeonjun.”

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

For the next few days of recording sessions, all goes well as it usually does, and Soobin takes you out on the occasional hang out right afterwards. You called them hang outs, he called them dates. Going out with no supervisors was obviously a big risk thing, but you weren’t kids. You knew how to handle yourselves and how to get out of certain situations.

“Are you sure you can really spend on me every single day? Seems like a lot.”

“We’re famous, honey, I think money’s the least of our concerns.”

“Don’t call me that.”

“I know you like it.”

You roll your eyes, Soobin putting on his mask as fast as he took it off. You follow him, walking up to the counter nervously as he takes both your orders, and after bickering, putting it under your card instead.

“So what was going through your mind making those demos?” He suddenly asks as you two wait side by side for your order. “What do you mean?”

“Sexy thoughts make sexy songs.”

“I can’t believe you just said that out loud. Everyone is looking at us right now.”

“I’m still waiting for my answer.”

“They were old, okay? I think I started working on them after your second album but never finished.”

“But what were you thinking of?”

You hesitate, biting down on your lip and avoiding eye contact with him. You can feel him staring at you, and you knew he wouldn’t break easy. You take a deep breath, ready for what’s to come. “I was thinking of–“

“Order for Soobin!” The barista calls, setting down a fruit tea and a coffee down on the counter. Everyone’s eyes were on him this time, and eventually you, taking the cup from his hand. “Why didn’t you use an alias?”

“I forgot.”

“You’ve been ordering for me the entire week and your excuse is that ‘you forgot’? You used an alias name the last time and somehow you just magically–“

“Is it actually Soobin?”

“Soobin! Can we get a photo?”

“Soobin, I love you!”

“I wish you’d say that to me.” He suddenly whispers into your ear, smacking away his face. There’s a bunch of people crowded around both of you, the feeling of claustrophobia kicking in as Soobin continues to smile through his mask.

“Is that Y/N?” You’re surprised at the mention of your own name, not thinking you’d be recognized like usual. “Y/N! I love your music– could I get a photo with you?” The one girl moves from Soobin’s crowd to in front of you, with a genuine, pleading smile on her face.

This was the only time you’d agree. “Sure.” You nod. She takes out her phone, taking a quick selfie with you. For some reason, you seem to admire her respect for your personal space, though she doesn’t see it fully, she can see and feel your sincerity with your eyes squinted as you smile. “Thank you so much! I’m looking forward to your future work!”

Your heart melts as she walks away, the sudden reminder that you’re with Soobin coming back to you, seeing as he’s crowded by all those girls and more people lining up out the door. “Soobin, are you on a date?” Rhetorical questions begin to come from the fans as some of them laugh along. “I’m treating my friend. She’s been working hard, and she deserves it.”

“Can we go?” You mutter, tapping his arm. He looks down at you for a moment before looking back at the crowd. “If you could excuse us, we should get going now.” He announces, the people making way for both of you to leave freely.

Soobin’s hand rests on your back the whole way, guiding you out and simply acknowledging the respectful goodbyes of the patrons, none of them following you out and simply letting you go.

There were more people outside, leaving the side walk empty as you both walked by, Soobin sending them waves. He still kept his hand on your back the entire time.

There were more people outside, leaving the sidewalk empty as you both walked by, Soobin sending them waves. He still kept his hand on your back the entire time.

He never takes it off.

“Are you okay?” He asks.

“Yeah. Why wouldn’t I be?”

“You looked a little overwhelmed.”

“How could you tell?”

“You were tense. Was it the crowd or was it my hand?”

“Both. Don’t you think this could get us into a scandal?”

“Media already knows we’re nothing more but close friends.”

“Well, the media likes to assume, too. They’ve been on our backs about it.”

“If we did get into a scandal, you wouldn’t mind it, would you?”

“A little bit.”

“Why?”

“We’re best friends, Soobin! Doesn’t it make you at least a little uncomfortable having people assume something they have no business being in?”

“It does. But you have to get used to it.”

“How did you do that?”

He pauses. “I didn’t. And I’ve never been in a situation where people do so yet. Until now. But those rumours have been existing for a while already. If anything, I’ll take the blame.”

“But your group. You’d jeopardize a lot! I should take the blame, less people know who I am.”

“That girl in there knew who you were. Besides, I’m the one that’s been asking you all week.”

“Soobin…”

“Y/N, I’d risk so much for you. We never talk all sappy like this since you always like to shut me down, but being your friend has helped me strengthen my values, even if all I do is go crazy about you.” He seems genuine, words true to his heart as you both stop outside your dorm. “I know you’re the type to worry about this stuff. Honestly, this’ll brush over before you know it. And if it doesn’t, just leave it to me.”

You’re suddenly wrapping your arms around him, taking a deep breath as you feel him hug you back. “Thank you. And I’m sorry if… I’ve been so pessimistic.”

“Honey, you were just being realistic. I completely understand that.”

You don’t know what else to say, simply resorting to a smile. “Goodnight, Soobin. I’ll see you tomorrow.”

“Goodnight, Y/N.”

You shut the door, dumping out the ice in your drink into the sink and throwing away the cup.

When you go to sleep that night, you think of a few things. That girl who took a photo with you. Her consideration and awareness. And the feeling of Soobin’s hand on your back.

You wished it was still there.

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

You felt like reeling.

You were already in a spiral, contemplating if those pitter-patters in your heart was because you were having medical problems or if you truly had a thing for your friend. Guess which one you’d rather figure out.

He was handsome. You always knew he was handsome. No matter what colour they decided to dye his hair, or however they styled it, it always looked good, and you hated it.

You hated how your excuse for being so cold to him was because ‘his beauty was bothering you’. It was foolish, stupid— if he ever found out, he would never let you live it down. You could hear his teasing remarks already.

It didn’t help that his eyes were so focused on you during the recording of your solo song. You say him out of the corner of your eye, staring at you intensely with his head resting on his hand. And he smirked when your eyes met. He fucking smirked.

You almost messed up your best take because of it.

Since when have you been so distracted by him? You figured it was just best to sing with your eyes closed the entire time rather than risking getting even a glimpse of him. Even if you kept your eyes on the lyric sheet, you could always feel his eyes on you.

Yet you refused to accept the fact you were at least a little bit attracted to him.

“Good job, Y/N.” He’d say, and the heat would rush straight to your cheeks.

Your hands rest on your waist, contemplating the section you just finished recording. “What do you think?” You finally look straight at Soobin, who seems to be thinking as hard as you were. “Redo it. It doesn’t… sound as sad as it did in the demo.”

“Shit, what should I do? I don’t get so emotional very often and when I do I get too sad to function.”

“Imagine I just rejected you.” You look at him, rolling your eyes, the supervisor in there obviously very confused at the unexplained statement. The inside joke was prominent, and though you knew he was joking around, it worked.

You thought of what would happen if he ever denied your advances like you did to his. Ironic, but heartbreaking. You swore you actually felt it wrench in you.

When you look at him again, his face is molded into a pleasantly surprised, ‘I knew it would work’ expression. Listening back on it, you were proud of the final result and finished recording for the day. You partially gave credit to Soobin’s outrageous suggestion.

“It worked, didn’t it?” He meets up with you outside the studio. “Maybe I’m just such a great actor.” You jokingly reply, lighting nudging his arm with your shoulder. “If you could hear it from the control room, honey, you’d be impressed. That was true heartbreak.”

“And we’re doing your song tomorrow.”

“I’ll be thinking of you when I record it.”

He’s saying that because he knows how it sounds, the composition and the overall vibe that comes from it. He knows damn well that it’s nothing short of sexy, and it’s the one that he’s been ranting to you so much about how much he loves it and how it’s his favourite. It also happens to be the last song you’d be recording before editing and sending off.

“I don’t know whether to feel flattered or objectified.”

“Sweetie, Choi Soobin just said he’s gonna think of you when recording one of the most suave songs in his entire life. You know him well enough to know he isn’t a pervert.”

“You really aren’t…” You have to admit it to yourself. Despite his snarky, flirtatious responses, he’s never called you anything beyond hot, cute, or… sexy. He’s the only person that can joke around with you like that. If anyone else did it, you wouldn’t speak to anyone for the next few days.

Anyone but him.

Soobin was always there for you during your lows. Whether you have been objectified while at work or on set, you come home with a nauseating feeling in your stomach and an urge to tell him all about it, because you know that he would understand. He’d offer you support, he’d check up on you in between his breaks, sometimes he’d even put in the effort to visit and bring you something or even just give you a hug.

He was a knack for being a sweetheart during times like that.

Yet he still continues to make your heart flutter with those names. You know it and damn well he knows that you secretly don’t mind being called those things at all. What you’ve noticed is that you’re the only one that he calls those things. Maybe it’s because you’re close, and you’re probably one of his only female friends that he is close with, but something is telling you there’s more than the eye can see.

And you wanted to find out what that was.

“I think you should be flattered, nonetheless. You are all can think of when I listen to the song.” He responds. “Is it because I’m the one singing it?” You snarkily reply, thinking nothing of it. “I know what was going through your mind writing that, Y/N. You probably imagined making out with someone and just put that into a tune.”

You say nothing.

“Really?! Is that what you’ve been thinking of!?”

“Don’t judge me, I write what I feel! And sometimes I feel… very interesting things.”

“So dirty. But I don’t blame you. You should’ve heard the demo for Tinnitus.”

“I did hear the demo for Tinnitus and honestly I am so pissed off you guys made the lyrics so depressing. That’s literally the horniest song and you chose to write about being a rock.”

“Hey, maybe when we’re done with this album, I can record it with you.”

“And publish it?”

“If the man agrees. I’d need a little help with the english, but I know you’re good at it.”

“I’m good at everything, honey.” You say, mocking him. “I think I’m gonna have a heart attack from that alone.” He says, his hand resting on his chest. “You know I’m just acting, right?”

“You called me it either way.”

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

Soobin had been nagging to take you out for bingsu the whole week. You always pushed it for after recording every single song, and now was finally the time. You figured it was best and only fair to treat him this way.

He entered with a pep in his step, looking at the menu above while you stared at him the whole time, noticing how innocent and gleeful his eyes were. He really was looking forward to this all week. “Y/N, what do you want?” You glare at him for using your real name since it was also your stage name, but the man at the register didn’t seem to react anyway, so you relax.

“I like injeolmi… but you can choose what you want.” And he orders just that, losing the argument over who would pay for it. At first, when you sat yourselves at a table, you were confused. “I thought you liked pat?”

“So sweet of you to remember. But you’ve been working hard for the past few weeks, and since I’ve been nagging you about this, I figured it’s only fair we get what you want.”

“But–“

“Y/N, I’m okay with anything. Seriously. Except mint chocolate. And we’re sharing.”

…

“What.”

“You can finish a small but not a large… so I thought this was a good idea. Were you not paying attention?”

Truth is you spaced out while looking at him.

“I spaced out.” You half-lie, breaking eye contact. He gets up from his chair, walking past the table after saying he had to use the bathroom. A group of girls walk in, the bell above the door ringing to notify their presence. They all crowd at the counter, another employee coming from behind.

“Order for Y/N?” Your head perks up at the mention of your name, slightly embarrassed he ended up using it, but you go to pick up the order, noticing one of the girls looking oddly familiar. You can’t help but look at her, head tilted, and she can’t help but look at you. “You’re…” You mutter.

“Am I really seeing you again? Am I dreaming?” She rapidly says under her breath, surprising that she managed to recognize you with the mask again.

“You’re the girl from the café.”

“You remember me?” She’s equally as shocked. “I think you’re one of the few people that’s come up to me to ask me for a photo, so yes, I do remember you.” She smiles and squeals as softly as she can, realizing her group of friends saved a table for them and grabbed an extra chair for her. “Are you with…” You find it funny you both know who she’s talking about.

“I am. He’s in the bathroom.”

“I saw him through the window when we were coming here. It was nice seeing you again!”

“You too.” You reply as she walks off to join her friends. You go back to your table, placing the tray down and seeing Soobin go back to his seat. “I saw you talking with that girl. Wasn’t she the one who–“

“Yes, she’s the one that asked me for the photo. Honestly a coincidence. She’s really nice.”

“You think they’ll recognize me if I take off my mask?”

“Definitely.”

He does just that, while you do the same, taking one of the spoons. You check your phone quickly after feeling it buzz in your pocket, looking up to see a spoonful of bingsu facing you and being held by Soobin.

“What are you doing?” You know what he’s doing.

“I’m not moving until you eat.”

You roll your eyes and accept his attempt at spoon feeding you, just so he wouldn’t have to stay in the awkward position the entire time.

You’re sure those girls are looking over at you, because you can barely hear their squeals at the sight. One of them was scolding the group, as you could barely make out what she was saying, hearing their excited greetings right after.

Soobin turns to wave and say hello before his attention is back on you. “That girl didn’t want them taking pictures. The one who knows who you are.”

“You’re starting to like her, aren’t you?”

“Maybe we should hire her as our bodyguard.”

“Open.”

You mimic his action from earlier, holding a spoonful towards him. He simply smirks before accepting your offer with no retort or reply, the expression on his face enough to tell you what he was thinking.

“The real Y/N wouldn’t feed me at all. Who are you?”

“The Y/N that’s… doing her best to resist the urge to cuss you out right now.”

“Why’d you do it?”

“Why not?”

“Because it’s very out of character for you.”

‘Because I think I may or may not have a thing for you.’

“Let me be nice for once, okay? Otherwise I’m gonna throw this in your face.”

“There she is. I thought I lost you.”

You chuckle. “You like it when I’m mean?”

“Being mean is the only side I ever get out of you.”

“That’s because you flirt with me. I’m nice otherwise, and you know that.”

“You aren’t wrong. Y/N, what will it take for you to fall victim to my charms?”

“You’re weird.” I think I already have.

“Answer the question.”

You ponder for a moment, Soobin’s hard gaze almost stopping you from thinking straight. “If you can fufill my wildest fantasies, maybe I will.”

“And does wild mean… intimate, perhaps?”

“You’re so loud! At least be cautious when you know what you’re talking about…”

“Is that a yes?”

You don’t respond, beginning to finish off the bingsu in front of you. “I’ll ask Jung-Hwa, then.” You scoff. “Good luck trying to get anything out of her.”

“I’ll just have to guess.”

Soobin couldn’t deny it. You were so extremely astonishing and he was starting to have a thing for you too.

Thinking your friend is hot is one thing. It could just be admiring how they manage to be so perfect all the time and nothing beyond it. Thinking your friend is hot and being attracted to them is another.

How was he gonna be nice enough for you to actually take his compliments seriously? If he tried, you wouldn’t believe him. He’s flirted with you enough that you had a valid reason to refuse that he actually meant anything he was saying.

So while you giddily continued eating, stealing all the rice cakes off the shaved ice, he tried his best to hide the blush that was slowly rising onto his face, the dessert in front of him doing nothing to cool him down.

“Ready to go?” You ask, snapping him out of his own thoughts. “Yeah. Let’s go.”

His eyes are on you, moving up and down your body attentively, but sly enough for others to not notice. But you just had to notice.

You notice everything.

“Choi Soobin, what were you just looking at?”

“You.”

“Did I have something on my face? Or were you looking at something you shouldn’t have?”

“You are so astonishingly attractive, honey, I’m sorry that I can’t help myself.”

“Put your mask on. There’s already a group of people following us.” He turns around, only to see nobody there. “Made you look.”

“Is this your way of getting out of sweet talk?”

“What else am I supposed to say? ‘Thank you’, ‘you too’?”

“I’d love to hear that second option.”

“In your dreams.”

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

You spent almost all your time in the studio for the next few days, most of the times getting out to use the bathroom or pick up a drink from the 19th floor. But it was your day to add any instruments, beats, and overall touch ups.

You were kept sane by conversations during breaks with Soobin and your manager. Mostly Soobin, since he was notorious for staying up later than his bandmates and always replying to you the minute you send a text. He checked up on you, asked if you needed anything, even if it was well past working hours and he needed to be asleep.

There’s a knock on the door while you’re just about to finish for the day. You get up to answer, greeted by a smiling Soobin holding a box in a plastic bag. “Can I come in?” You sigh with a smile, too mentally tired to argue and let him in, closing the door behind him.

He claims the chair beside yours, placing the bag down and taking the box out of it. This time your food was being delivered in person. “How’s it going so far?”

“Almost done for the day. I’m quite literally on the last song nearing the last second and I’ve had every single track on repeat that I might get sick of it.”

“You say that for every track you produce and you end up loving it.”

You stretch and feel as though your entire body has been resurrected again, making you question how bad your posture was and how long you were sitting for. You turned around to see Soobin standing in front of you. “So… I just remembered you haven’t answered my question I asked a week ago.”

“How do you still– nevermind.”

“What were you thinking of when you were working on the tracks? The concept? Honey, I’ve seen your texts to your manager over your shoulder and it makes me wonder what led you to approve of such explicit designs?”

At first, you don’t remember him asking the question at all. Then it hits you like a ton of bricks. The answer he never got was an answer not permitted to be shared with him. He’d never let you live it down.

“I imagined making out with someone for that one song. Don’t you remember me saying that?”

“Oh, honey, I remember that very well. But I know there’s something more behind that you aren’t telling me. And as your collaborative artist and very, very good friend… I feel I should deserve to know.”

He inched closer to you, leaning in with that sweet but mischievous smile he always had on whenever he was around you. “You wanna know what I was thinking of?” You retort, immediately getting embarrassed and hiding your face in your shoulder.

“I was thinking of you…”

He leans in closer, his hand cupping his ear. “What was that?”

“I was thinking of you.” This time you face him, watching that stupid smirk you hated seeing grow right in front of you. “Me?”

“You and your concept photos, how good you looked in them… how you’d look when recording them, when we recorded Tinnitus…”

“You were thinking of my abs?”

“Yes, I was thinking of your abs, okay, you got your answer for the sake of my own dignity.”

“Wow, Y/N, I am honoured to be so inspiring and being able to fufill your erotic fantasies in order for you to create the hottest album of all time.”

“If you say a word of this to anyone, I’m never producing for your group ever again.”

“I think it’s funny how you’re obsessed with me as much as I am obsessed with you.”

“What?”

“You’re beautiful, honey. You are so incredibly talented with a knack for everything and you manage to look fucking breathtaking while doing so. If you could see what I’m seeing right now, my God. You are so alluring, Y/N.”

You stay silent as he comes closer, eye contact not breaking and tension hot and heavy. “You really mean it?”

“Mean what?”

“That. And every single time you’ve flirted with me.”

“I meant every single word I’ve said to you. I always have. The question is… do you mean every insult you call me? Every threat you send my way?” Your face goes warm, and he can see you blush, but your expression doesn’t change at all. He walks towards you, making you stop at the edge of the table as he continues to move closer. “No.”

“Did you imagine me being this close to you for your music?”

“Maybe.”

“I just poured my heart out for you, Y/N, you can just tell me the truth.” He smiles, hands on either side of you gripping the table, trapping you. “I did.”

“And what else did you imagine? What other dirty fantasies have been going through your head that caused you to produce such amorous melodies?”

You feel your ego climb through the roof. “I imagined what it would feel like to kiss you.”

“There you go, telling the truth for me. Now, I’ve made this fantasy of being so close to you a reality… why not make that other one come true?”

At this point, you’ve lost your patience.

You hold both sides of his head, pulling him in to kiss you messily. It’s sloppy at first, given your aggressive approach, but the minute his hands rest on your waist, everything else doesn’t matter. You just needed to have his lips on yours because God knows how desperate you have gotten ever since you’ve been in the studio, away from him.

It felt empty, lonely, uneasy when he wasn’t there. Maybe you just spent so much time with him that it felt unusual to be alone. And you preferred being alone, so why did it matter so much? That Soobin wasn’t there?

But that didn’t matter. All that mattered was that he was kissing you so passionately, you felt his hands slowly move down to rest over your ass as he began to kiss you deeper, his tongue somehow slipping into your mouth without you noticing.

His lips were as soft as you saw them on the screen, his efforts to kiss you aggressive and contrasting. They were so pink when you pulled away, glistening with a mix of your spit. You messed up his hair and he messed up yours, but he still managed to look so good. “I’m so in love with you.” He whispers before he kisses you again, this time softer and more gently than before.

The post makeout haze is silent, slightly awkward, but fulfilling. At this point you two are merely staring at each other, breaking eye contact at times but finding you just couldn’t help but bring your gaze back to him.

“I don’t know if we can do this. Us, I mean.” You say.

“I know. But I want to.”

“How long? How long have you liked me like this?”

“When we went out for food after the Blue Hour promotions were over and Yeonjun invited you.”

“Jesus, that’s… a long time.”

“Do you like me the way I like you, Y/N? ‘Cause honestly, it’d be a little embarrassing if I just said it to your face only to find out you don’t see me the same way.”

“I literally just made out with you for five minutes straight and admitted to thinking of your six-pack while making this album.”

“…So you do?”

“Yes, I do. I really like you. A lot. And… I’m sorry for all the times I’ve friendzoned you.”

“You do what you gotta do in this industry. I don’t blame you. But… I really want to be your boyfriend.”

“And I wanna be your girlfriend.”

You both sit in silence for a moment as Soobin turns his chair to fully face you. “So what will we do?” You ask, breaking the ice that was beginning to freeze again. “I’ll take you on a date. After this and before our photoshoots.”

“And our company?”

Soobin ponders. “I’ll do my best to refrain from kissing you in public.”

“You’d fail immediately.”

“I would. That’s why I said I’ll try.”

Your eyes dart to the box left unattended and forgotten. “What is that, anyways?” You look at the box behind him, Soobin turning to open it and revealing fried chicken, boneless and split into two flavours. His sentimentality makes you chuckle, and how he remembered exactly what you liked.

You go to grab a piece from the box, but he pulls it away before you can even touch it.

“Give me a kiss first.”

You stare at him, not taking him seriously. “If I can’t kiss you in public, at least let me kiss you when we’re alone. Please?” You smile at his pleading, giving him what he wants just so you could start eating.

“I think the security cameras caught enough intimacy for tonight.” You say, stealing a piece of yangnyeom from the box.

“So much for trying to not kiss you in public, then.”

“We tried. Now eat, or I’ll finish it myself.”

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

He tried. He really did try not to kiss you anywhere in the public eye.

But you always looked so damn good that he wanted to pull you aside and kiss you just to show the public out of spite. And after many, many long months of you ignoring him in public, you decided to change something when you went on tour.

Though you rejected his advances in the open, you two had hefty make out sessions in private to make up for it.

Your North American tour would start in Canada and end in the U.S., the last city on your list being Los Angeles, where you’d become one of the many artists that performed there.

You’ve been on smaller tours in the region of Asia. Anywhere beyond that was new to you. Soobin had to show you the ropes. Along with being one sweet piece of eye candy on stage, he was also really helpful and surprisingly didn’t tease you so much whenever you asked for something.

Your company knew. Your staff knew. But no one outside knew that you and Soobin were in a relationship. It wasn’t unusual for a makeup artist to walk in on you giving him a kiss on the cheek or for stylists to witness him peppering kisses along your neck.

Venue staff didn’t seem to care either.

Being able to be intimate while rehearsing is the closest you’ve ever gotten to revealing your relationship status to the general public. But in this sense, it was more comfortable. More comfortable that it ever would be if netizens found out. You didn’t let that distract you.

You had one goal: to leave an impact through your performances.

It honestly surprised you how much you were globally renowned. A lot, but not all of your venues were sold out, and seeing them all seated there was a rush of adrenaline you’ve never felt before. Unlike Soobin, this was all new to you. And you loved it.

You loved that you were loved by many overseas, and that they recognized you for your production skills and professionalism alongside your energy when performing. It was like a whole stage play, the way your concert played out.

You had a little surprise for the California crowd.

Surprise as in, Soobin didn’t know about it, the staff didn’t know about it, nobody. Okay, maybe the staff did know because you were scared you were gonna get in trouble if you didn’t tell them beforehand. You didn’t do this for any other city, and you didn’t rehearse it. This was gonna be spontaneous. Usually you stuck to a plan, but sometimes you can squeeze a little something extra within, can’t you?

At the end of the last song of the night, you were put into a particular pose with Soobin where his face was in close proximity with yours. And you finally gave into the urge.

On the large, lit up stage, surrounded by thousands of people, you kissed him. It showed on the screens behind you, and you swore you could hear screams even with the in-ear monitor.

As the light turned off and only displayed your silhouettes, you rest your forehead against his.

“I love you, Soobin.”

He’s obviously very surprised, but plays along with it.

“I love you too, Y/N.”

And somehow the screams get even louder.

It was probably your favourite concert of the entire tour. You revealed what felt like a part of your world to the public. It felt… freeing.

Your phone buzzed against your nightstand, putting it on silent mode as Soobin joins you in the hotel bed.

“Hi.” He smiles tiredly.

“Hi.” You return, moving closer to him.

“I didn’t know you were gonna do that tonight.”

“I did. I liked it. Did you?”

“Oh, I loved it. Never thought you could be such a troublemaker.”

“There’s a lot of things you don’t know about me.”

“Oh? That is?”

“…I don’t like injeolmi bingsu that much.”

He gasps. “Really?”

“Really.”

“Ah, you really changed.”

“I am always changing, Soobin. It’s a matter of growth.”

“Then, when we go back to Korea, we’ll get pat bingsu. As a celebratory gift.”

“For what?”

“For working your ass off on this album and tour, Y/N. I’m so unbelievably proud of you and all that you’ve done to get this approved and popular.”

“You’re gonna make me fall in love again.”

“I certainly wouldn’t mind that.”

kiss, far from reason, throw it all. i wanna kiss your lips. 🎧

[daenystheedreamer]

what are your thoughts on the seven? Like, what are we to make of them as deities?

just reread the series, and on first pass (tho i plan to go back searching for this) it seems like the seven come off as... less Tangible than the Old Gods/R'hllor. like melisandre births shadow assassins. bloodraven Exists. clearly there's something to these gods. maybe not what their worshipper's think, but like. a Power, for sure.

By contrast, the seven seem to exist solely in the minds of those who believe in them. Trials by combat seem to be 50/50. Tyrion win's Lysa's but loses Cersei's. the faith of the seven are notoriously corrupt, and after the sparrow's takeover, is going full-tilt crazy fundamentalist.

Yet these gods bring a great deal of comfort to the characters who believe in them. And I can't help but think about Septon Meribald, wandering the war-torn riverlands barefoot to give out oranges and flour and alms to those in need. That kind of religious-charity seems to be exclusive to the seven.

So given all this... idk, what's their deal? Are they "gods as a reflection of humanity"? "gods as a reflection of society"? I feel like "they were always 100% fake and anyone who ever prayed to them was praying to nothing" is a little too grimdark for grrm, but idk!

Sorry for the long ask jfjsjjd

i am not a good meta poster or essayist so my apologies for what will surely be a poor answer 😭 so introduction. grrm is lapsed catholic and the seven is like soo barely removed from catholicism. also rhllor/old gods doing things in text doesnt necessarily make them, the gods, real. the magic is certainly real but that doesnt mean the gods themselves are real. and so that goes into the whole Do the gods of planetos actually exist at all. so the faith isnt actually alone in having the Are the gods real? question

the faith is based on faith right, belief without necessarily having proof. it's pretty unique actually for that. the old gods have weirwoods and dreams, rhllor has shadowbinding, but the faith doesnt even have martyrdom/saints/incorruptibility/miracles/etc. its purely a social function; hierarchy, laws, morality and life-after-death existentialism.

i think this is what grrm is exploring, another brick in the wall of Society. like how is religion used as a hammer for hierarchy and how does it interact with power, with patriarchy, with classism. yes, the faith descends into fundamentalism but its also one of the only ways the peasant class can organise and attack the establishment. its social mobility in a way they cant otherwise access.

so i guess in all my rambling, i'd agree with the assessment that its 'gods as a reflection of society/humanity'. i dont think the fact that theyre 100% fake is bleak, really. i think all religions are fake irl but that doesnt take away from the beauty and love and joy they can bring to people. for every cruel septa/on, there's a meribald who brings peace and forgiveness.

idk again i am not a good meta poster i cant pull out quotes for shit 😭 but i remember the moments of jaime earnestly praying. and you look at melisandre who uses her faith in rhllor as a desperate attempt to justify her own sense of self, her suffering, her actions. its similar in a way to the faith. melisandre's total belief in rhllor, no matter how delusional, is just as important as if rhllor himself actually existed.

so to summarise, the meaning we gain from metaphysical concepts can be just as important as the perceived power of the metaphysical concept itself. idk im sure im making a mess of the philosphical idealism vs materialism plus i am making no sense and making no actual points but i hope this communicates my personal interpretation of the faith of the seven!

[sqwdkllr]

dude your art is so amazing..i fucking love how you do anatomy, and linework, its just so perfect and also your qsmp designs??!? so fucking cool. your deathduo especially is so so dear to me<3 and your bluebird au(/aus?) amd your bluebird art in general its just so <33333…and your qsmp entities like cucu and eye creature and especially baribel, MAN those are singlehandedly my favorite qnpc designs theyre so great like. how the eye guy just has Teeth that come out of his head wherever?? and all your little headcanons about the bears??? THEYRE SO COOL MAN. and your philza with the patches on his pants n the baby zombie scar on his leg (also whats the scar on his nose from?)(also also i love your phils hair, like the short with the little braid its so neat:DD), and pommes hijab braids, and the zippers on th back of cucu and ositos heads (i have yet to figure out what those are for but ehatever theyre cool anyway) n just like. the thought and detail that goes into them, im rambling but aa<333 theyre all amazing:) OU AND YOUR COMICS,, i love love love how you structure n format them because theyre so dynamic and interesting while still being super readable and the ART IVE SAID IT ALREADY BUT I NEED TO SAY IT AGAIN I LOVE YOUR STYLE SO MUCH. its just so nice. like how you use general shapes and like i dont know how to explain it but its cool:)) your art lives in this little spot in my brain rent free…made me subconsciously kind of incorporated stuff you do into my own art process like sketching shit in blue LOL

anyway sorry for the wall of text i just needed to rant a tiny bit because youre one of my fsvorite artists n you inspire me so much ssob,,anyway have a good day mate

This ask makes my heart explode oh my goddd. I'm so happy you enjoy the stuff I put out augghh that so sweet THIS ENTIRE MESSAGE IS SO SWEET WTF. I hope you are ready for a ramble about hc/theory/design choices. Seriously its long-

I have so many head canons I like showing. Some lean towards theory territory and others I legitimately do not believe in myself BUT I like drawing it out because WHY NOT !!?? I like the whimsy of it all

THE BLUEBIRD AU is purely me having fun. Its such an angst filled au that is coated with a mask of nuclear family and hurt/comfort. In reality its like being hit with a sauce pan repeatedly. I'm more of a scientist Jaiden believer personally. DON’T GET ME STARTED ON DEATHDUO- Man I want to go back to drawing self-indulgent stuff for that. Fuck this ask is making my brain engine go insane AUGHH-

Like stuff about Osito just being a huge flirt because of their exposure to Roier from the beginning or Baribal being a pot head, yeah those sort of head cannons I'm sure people are dying to hear from me (sarcasm). Or more serious ones like the relationship, more like lack of, between Cucurucho and Baribal being one of miscommunication that snowballed into hate but never enough to kill each other. Literally the trope of "twins separated where one is raised within evil and other is forced to take them down" but it's very dark grey from both sides. YESSIR

Or other theory territory like federation not knowing that Cucurucho and Osito are not the same person because it’s a secret- BUT THAT’S VERY FANON/THEORY TERRITORY AND TOO CONVOLUTED FOR HERE-

Oh and of course more tame head cannons like sexualities and stuff. Cucurucho is aromantic to me. All of them are transgender. The entire fed staff. Fuck even the purgatory island goobers. No real concept of what gender is and sort of adopted what the islanders do or what the federation refers to them as. It's just not a thing, same with labels on sexuality. If you like someone then you just like them and that’s how it rolls !!

THE WATCHER. MAN DO I HAVE THOUGHTS ON THIS GUY. Like actual constant threat and you are left scrambling trying to figure out the rules of not pushing the wrong buttons so you stay alive. I know his concept art had like him as a human at some point, but I like fungus goop watcher more. Little goober who just so happen to survive the longest, learn the most, and as a result evolve to what he is now. Eventually became strong enough to overthrow the previous leader (and consume them-) and is now king of the purgatory island in privacy. Until the new islanders were sent there ofc. So yeah, bro is very old, its why Cucurucho has no clue who this dude is when he does get to put a face to the name.

PHILZA. This guy is the kinda guy to put survival above all. So I like to imagine that not only would he be covered in scars because he tanks most of the hits and is generally a very selfless person- SOME SCARS HAVE A REASON ! The zombie scar being one of course, semi infected bc I like to think that he did not die in his hc world but rather came close to it. And his buildings is what caught the attention of the goddess of death and allowed for her to give him immortality and be her eyes in the mortal realm as her angel of death. So the poison is still in his foot, just unmoving. Stuck in time just like his body unable to age. As for the scar on his cheek? Nightmare Stalker grabbing him by the face and throwing him in the ocean the second time he tried to get up to save Tallulah. The only evidence left of that night happening. YES SHORT HAIR PHILZA AND POMME WITH A HIJAB YESSS

The zippers are supposed to show that their "head" is not actually what they look like. It’s a helmet/mask. I don't draw their real faces out of fear of making them look too "human" but rather I enjoy the implication that they COULD LOOK LIKE any other islander. Isn’t the thought that this horrible twisted shell of a being could look just as human as you so much more eerie? I dunno I was watching horror analysis videos of the unknown while building the fanon side of them- Now why their masks can emote?,,, its cartoon logic !! And it's cute I have so many thoughts on these guys can you tell? OH MY GODD THANK YOU THO. Augh this is the sweetest message ive ever read pls.im so so very glad these little guys can make you happy. That’s such an honor fr !!

[flame-x]

Kittens Week

So!! I have got the details!!

Kittens week will be taking place from Sunday the 9th of April to Saturday the 15th of April. I apologise for the short notice, but I will be too busy in the weeks after that.

Sunday the 9th - Victoria

Monday the 10th - Jemima/Sillabub

Tuesday the 11th - Pouncival and/or Carbucketty

Wednesday the 12th - Etcetera and Electra

Thursday the 13th - Tumblebrutus and/or Bill Bailey

Friday the 14th - Mungojerrie and Rumpleteazer

Saturday the 15th - Swing and/or OC kitten

As my timezone is GMT, I will be reblogging a post when I see it, whether the post is about the character whose day it is or the character from the day before.

Please tag your post so I can reblog!! The hashtag we will be using is #kittensweek. You are also welcome to tag me in your post! In fact, please tag me in case the hellsite is being weird!

General notes: - All types of submissions are fine! You don't need to be a writer or an artist to paticipate! Fics, art, headcannon posts, gifs, photos, edits, walls of text, just nattering on about a character, etc. - Considering it's a kittens week, all these characters are being classed as kittens. If that doesn't fit with your interpretation of the character, that's absolutely fine - you don't need to participate. I don't want to hear about discourse over this. - Along the same vein, this is a SFW event. These characters are kittens. - Although participation for all the days would be amazing, you can of course pick and choose characters to participate for. If Victoria is your cup of tea but you don't think about Tumblebrutus much, feel free to take part on her day and not his! - Please make sure the focus of your work is the character you are posting about! While it is of course ok to include non-kitten characters (it is in fact encouraged - I love to see other people's thoughts on relationships between characters specifically) the focus must be on the kitten in question. Otherwise, you've missed the point. - Multiple posts are a yes!! That would be wonderful!!

And again, just to reiterate - your work about the kitten in question must be focused on when they are a kitten, not when they've grown up. It is a kittens week, after all.

Hope you enjoy the event!!!

(and again, apologies for short notice - the alternative would be waiting until june ssjdskfhl)

and also thank you to @carbuckety for reading over this to make sure i dont sound nonsensical!!