#i KNOW that criticism of homestuck is not in turn criticsm of me or my writing. logically. but emotionally? it is just the way it feels.
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gotta wonder sometimes if new people are put off by my rambling lol because i am the bitch that leaves a small novel in discord dms when you are asleep
#but also just in general#i am about to ramble thus proving my point lmao:#im listening to homestuck made this world rn and like. this is something hussie does a lot is they will ramble about their own thing a lot#and sometimes it is seen as like. annoying. or self-aggrandizing#and sometimes it is definitely that. like sometimes they are just saying shit to absolve themselves of responsibility.#but other times i am very interested in what they have to say!#but then the commentators on the podcast will make fun of what they said and im like. oh we.. were not supposed to find that interesting?#were supposed to find that annoying and narcissistic? ok i guess.#and its just like. well fuck i think i do that. am i bad too? am i annoying and narcissistic too?#listening to this podcast also had made me realize that there are a lot of ways in which i have not changed since i was 16#because i still get very sensitive about when people criticize homestuck for what i think are the wrong reasons#because of course i have endless criticisms of homestuck myself#but like cameron will be like 'i fucking hate this bunny i think its so stupid' and im just thinking ok die then. lmao#or like. cameron seems to not like that the story becomes very character-driven in act 5#which is my favorite part of homestuck. i love character-driven stories and that is also what i write#and so it feels like hes also criticizing MY writing in that way because my writing is SO HEAVILY INFLUENCED by homestuck#idk! i wish more people read my stuff so i could have an accurate read on how it is perceived but oh well i guess!#personal#and here i go saying more after i thought i was finished because i feel the need to clarify even tho no one gives a shit#i KNOW that criticism of homestuck is not in turn criticsm of me or my writing. logically. but emotionally? it is just the way it feels.#thats another thing i do is over-explain and over-clarify because being misunderstood is so scary
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