#i HATED savine the first time i read this book

[xserpx]

'What have I done?' she whispered, and she sank down to one knee in the road.

If she had really tried, if she had truly wanted to, she could have found a way to stop this. There were a thousand moments when she could have found a way to stop this.

Instead, she has fanned the flames. Instead, she had rolled the dice. And what for? Ambition. That snake twisted tight about her innards whose hunger grew sharper the more it was fed. Whose hunger could never be satisfied.

The truth was, like all gamblers who suddenly lose big, she had only thought about what there was to win. Now she saw the scale of her loss, and it was no less than everything. And she had not only lost on her own behalf, but for thousands of others. What would it mean for Zuri? What would it mean for Broad? For Haroon and Rabik? For Liddy and May? By the Fates, what would it mean for her unborn child?

'What have I done?'

— Savine dan Glokta, The Trouble With Peace by Joe Abercrombie

[strawberry-cowmilk]

good damage

-> satan x mc

mc's gender is not mentioned, not proof read

a/n: I love making these title references :))

content warnings: angst, feelings of inferiority, lesson 5/6/9 spoilers, crime novel (mentions of murder and fire in the book), strong language, yelling, violence

-----

It’s hard to feel like your own person when you were born from the literal emotions of somebody else. It doesn’t matter how hard you try to create your own identity, it’s like a part of the other person will always be with you. Like some heavy luggage you have to carry around. Do you feel good about yourself when you wear clothes only in colors you know they’d never wear? Does participating in hobbies the other person doesn’t share make you feel fulfilled? How would you react to seeing them order the same drink at a café? Really, does everything have to be different? You know you’re only hurting yourself. There is no way you are just a clone, but your brain keeps screaming it at you.  

Sometimes, it feels like you put a band aid over the lacerations that are these feelings. Finally, peace of mind at last... only for said band aid to fall off two days later. ‘Satan? Why are you putting sardines in Lucifer’s shoes? You were getting alone fine yesterday.’ Well, Beel, I don’t know, maybe I have to see him suffer to make myself feel better. ‘You’re really gonna pull that? Well, man, good luck. I ain’t helpin’ or savin’ you, though!’ Mammon is right, these ‘pranks’ never end well. ‘Satan, I am very disappointed in you.’

But this isn’t even close to the actual worst feeling of them all. The worst feeling ever is knowing that you aren’t actually needed, and that your mere existence is a constant reminder of your family’s trauma. You were born on the same day they fell from grace, the same day their sister died. Do they see you as her replacement? Do you see yourself as her replacement? You don’t know, but you do know for sure that they would be happier with her instead of you. 

Maybe, one day, you can turn all of these insecurities and self-hatred into something nice.

...

It was a rainy autumn night in the Devildom. Everyone finished their dinner and retreated back into their own rooms. Satan was reading his newest detective novel, and he never hated the culprit in a book more than this one. His motives were just so stupid! Who kills their sibling because they make them hate themself? Seriously, just realise you are not them, and they are not you. Plus, the culprit was born on the same night their family’s house burned down. He was convinced his family hates his guts because his birth and their trauma falls on the same date. That’s such insane reasoning! You have no proof! Wait, hold on...

Satan let the book fall from his hand on his lap, and stared in front of him as the sound of the rain hitting the window filled his senses. It’s too loud, can’t it just shut up? And this room is so filthy, why can’t he clean his own damn room? The avatar of wrath aggressively picked the book up before ripping it in half. It’s all the book’s fault, if only it hadn’t ruined his mood, he wouldn’t be getting annoyed by everything right now. Yes, it’s totally the book, the book ruined everything, nothing’s on Satan himself at all, right? Keep lying to yourself.

‘Yes! Levi takes first place again!’ the third born exclaimed as you playfully dropped your controller on the floor. ‘Alright, you beat me again at Devilcart, but next time I win!’ Just as you were about to start a new match, you heard a loud noise come from somewhere outside. Both you and Levi stopped moving and held your breaths, and just when you thought it was gone, you heard it again. Leviathan’s eyes widened briefly from realisation. ‘It’s coming from Satan’s room.’ he commented. You fidgeted with the hem of your shirt. ‘I think I’m going to check on him.’ Levi nodded in response. You really hope no cascade of books came falling down in Satan’s room again. His room is already pretty messy, it took hours to clean up. You knocked loudly on the door, making him know somebody is there before slowly opening the door. Inside, you saw Satan completely tearing up a book. His piercing green gaze shot towards you. ‘Fucking leave me alone!’ he yelled. You knew it was very dangerous to approach an angry avatar of wrath, and yet you still did it. Something must have happened here, Satan doesn’t just destroy books for fun. You placed your hands on his forearms from behind, causing him to freeze. For a second, you thought he was about to fling you out of the room, but instead he changed back to normal. ‘Mc, what am I doing?’ he sighed before sinking down to sit on the floor. You occupied the spot next to him, waiting for him to speak again. ‘I’m out here getting upset over a fictional character because I can’t deal with my own issues.’ he grabbed a handful of his blond locks and squeezed his eyes shut. ‘I’m sorry, did I hurt you?’ you shook your head. ‘No, and this isn’t about me.’ You knew the chances of Satan openly telling you exactly what is brothering him are slim. But you want him to know he’s not alone, and somebody is willing to listen to his voice. 

‘I’m glad you’re here. I really need to work on myself.’ Satan confessed. ‘I hope this is my final wake-up call.’ You placed a hand on his shoulder in response. ‘That’s really good, maybe you can find a healthier way to deal with you anger until then?’ Satan flashed you a little smile. ‘I was thinking of that, actually. I want to write my own book.’ It would be a long way until Satan could accept himself, but he could finally see a ray of hope within the current darkness.

[luckspren]

I'm finally reading the Age of Madness trilogy. I just finished part 4 (so basically part 1 of The Trouble with Peace) and I looove it. I'm trying my hardest to be normal about the series, but my god. Abercrombie is definitely an auto-buy author for me. On the one hand I want to take my time with the rest of the trilogy and on the other hand I can't wait to read more. I am legitimately nervous about where some of those storylines will go.

While I wasn't exactly worried about not liking the trilogy (beause I heard many readers apparently prefer this one to the first trilogy and so far Abercrombie hasn't let me down), next-generation books can be kinda tricky for me, especially if the characters from the books before are still around. But I really like the new pov-characters.

Some thoughts and speculations under the cut:

So far I like the pov of Rikke and Orso the best. I do really enjoy the other perspectives too, though. Broad is probably the one I am least interested in right now

Rikkes prophecy... so up to the lion eating the wolf the events have already happened. So next comes the lamb eating the lion and we already know that Orso is the lamb. With the civil war brewing I have no reason to doubt that. So the question is who the owl represents. I guess the owl is often associated with wisdom, so maybe we are supposed to think that Bayaz wins it all again? Given that every other animal in the prophecy is connected to a member of the next generation though, I think the owl will also be one of them. Savine already likened herself to a snake, so I don't think it's her, even though she has a claim to the throne. So I think it's either Rikke or Jappo who we haven't really met yet, but Styria has to come into the plot sooner or later

(I haven't really considered Vick, Clover or Broad for the owl, because I read the animals/characters in the prophecy more as stand-ins for the nations they lead. Broad also already has the bull as an animal motif and so far Vick and Clover have no real power by themselves, so I just think it's unlikely, at least at this point in the story)

Leo is soooo doomed. It's amazing how he never learns from his mistakes. I don't actually dislike his chapters, but he is a very aggravating character to read about. He is so easily manipulated, I'm sure I still feel bad for him, when his downfall inevitably comes.

also with his colossal mommy issues I still can't quite tell if he's bi and in denial or gay and in denial. Either way, he's definitely into Jurand who I already feel bad for. Like I'm worried about Leos entire friend group. I feel like they are doomed by association. But not only is Jurand the only voice of reason in that group that nobody ever listens to, I also can't see Leo reacting favorably if his feelings ever come to light. Obviously Leo is married now, but I don't think even the friendship would survive, what with Leos pretty severe internalized homophobia. Also there was a moment in A Little Hatred where I thought Jurand may have something going on with Glaward (I think that's his name...definitely something with a G), because it's specifically mentioned that they spring apart when Leo runs through the camp after Rikke has her fit, so I thought maybe a little jealousy would move the plotline along, but that didn't happen. But maybe the Leo/Savine marriage reveal finally will ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Civil war is definitely coming and as I said before, I think Leos side will lose. Right now Orso seems in a worse position with everyone hating him. But Isher and co. seem to bank on the fact that Leo has allied himself with Stour who I can easily see betraying Leo. I don't know, I just think Leo will regret the decision to leave him alive. He should really listen to the women in his life but obviously he isn't gonna

I don't really know how things in the North will progress, now that the Dogman is dead ( :((( ). There is no chance in hell that Rikke will agree to an alliance with Stour and probably she's still pissed at Leo, so I guess she will rally the men (or at least a faction of them) behind her somehow... but the protectorate is also sandwiched between them and that seems like a terrible position to be in on her own.

Also I wonder if Styria will sweep in right after the Union weakens itself by infighting. Or maybe one of the sides will try to ally with Styria. Again that seems more likely for Leos side, buuut...Orso is half styrian and while Terez would fucking hate it, I could maybe see him giving up his claim to Styria entirely in his search for possible allies? He already didn't want to be king of the Union, I don't think he wants Styria. That would certainly be a twist regarding the tensions between the Union and Styria. But then again I don't now how that would fit into Vicks current storyline.

I am suspicious of everything. When Selest told Leo she wouldn't have missed his wedding even if Bayaz locked her in the House of the Maker I immediately went: Tolomei, is that you?? That's maybe more of an easter egg, but I am still pretty intrigued how and when the Bayaz plotline will come more to the forefront.

Jezal died (or was murdered?) and I'm being so brave about it. All in all not surprising. But I was so sure he would be assassinated at the end of the parade for Leo and Orso that I actually got my hopes up that he would at least survive book 1, only for the last chapter title to punch me in the gut. I literally started 2024 with reading his death. At least he died not knowing that his children had an affair.

It's amazing that I actually felt kinda bad for Savine and Orso and that they couldn't be together. It's him not knowing why that makes the situation so frustrating. I am not sure how many people in the story know of her true parentage. Maybe she will tell him herself later in the story. I guess he has to find out somewhere down the line

Given her marriage to Leo, maybe they will even use her parentage to strengthen his cause, but for that to happen, Savine would have to admit it to Leo first and right now I don't see it happening. Also the affair with Orso already seems subject to gossip, so trying to use her parentage wouldn't help her reputation at all (and I think Leo would also react with disgust) and people would for sure doubt the parentage of her own child

Speaking of which, I'm also not sure if I am supposed to question the parentage of Savines child? There was mention that she had her period shortly before Leo came to Adua, but wasn't Valbeck also right before his visit? Given that there are no paternity tests in this world, I am guessing I have to take Savines thoughts on the matter at face value and it's actually Leos child.

Interesting how the national conflicts are also kinda personal because of the partner switch at the end of A Little Hatred. Given that they are married now, I think Savine will support Leo in his treason. Still think he's a bad investment so to speak. So maybe she will use her pregnancy to get back into Orsos good graces once her side is losing.

Clover killing Wonderful also was quite the gut punch. I literally went 'oh no' the moment Stour made the request, because of course he would do it.

I find the similarities between Clover and Vick pretty interesting (in the sense that they both are betraying people around them so easily, at least seemingly)... While I am probably supposed to think that Vick will defect to Styria, the scene with Vitari makes me believe that she might actually stay loyal to Glokta in the long run. Clover on the other hand mostly thinks about his own well-being...and I don't know, I feel like Stour should watch his back around him. If the right opportunity comes along to get rid of him, I think Clover would take it. I would certainly cheer him on and it would endear him to Rikke... so maybe he will end up in her camp.

Even with all my precautions about spoilers, I think I managed to get spoiled about the identity of the weaver. I can only hope that is something that gets revealed soon, so I can go into book 3 completely blind

There is so much more I could write about these books and I am not even really halfway through (I haven't even touched on the breakers/burners etc)...

There is not one pov-character that I can't see ending up as a villain. Even the ones that start out more genial like Rikke and Orso might change for the worse, but Abercrombie does a good job of making them all the hero of their own story, if that makes sense.

I also keep thinking about people who start reading First Law with the Age of Madness trilogy and how that changes the reading experience. Don't think I would recommend that, but things like the half-sibling-reveal probably hit harder.

[yvainegelinemarie]

How The MLQC Bois React When You Do A ‘Baby/Cutesy Talk’ To Them.

🖤🦋🖤Idk if anyone has done this one yet so here it goes...

𝚨𝖇𝖔𝖚𝖙 𝖒𝖞 𝖜𝖗𝖎𝖙𝖎𝖓𝖌: ✨ ALL my writing promts are gender inclusive and promote love, kindness and fun for all! 

✨I know that each and every one of our boys would love and support each and everyone of you and I hope that my readings portray that comforting, accepting and loving nature through and through~ 

✨And with that I hope you Spookies enjoy~~

☪ 𝕱𝖆𝖓𝖉𝖔𝖒: Mr. Love Queen’s Choice

☪ 𝕽𝖆𝖙𝖎𝖓𝖌:18+  Has mild talk about sex, mentions drinking/alcohol. 

☪ 𝕱𝖔𝖗𝖒𝖆𝖙 : Quick Read, bullet points 

𝕶𝖎𝖗𝖔|10/10

He eats the baby talk up!!! And does it right back to you with so much ease!

You guys have full on conversations with just the two of you using baby talk towards one another.

And you both have no problem doing it in public and annoying all your friends with how mushy and maybe a bit cringey you two can be.

Most of your baby talk conversations is the two of you whining back and forth about wanting food.

“Aww, Kiro can I pwlese haves a snack now? It’s been a few howers pwlesee?! 🥺🥺”

“Bwut what if I want a snack moreeeee?!”

You two stare at one another intensely with large, watery, puppy dog eyes and quivered lips.

Neither one of you is going down this easily over the remaining sweet candy that you have left. 

Kiro will ALWAYS use the cute talk on you when you are trying to keep him from eating sweets as Savin ordered. But the moment he brings out the cute voice and the puppy dog eyes you have lost.

It’s just so hard to not cave in to such a cute face!!! 

But it’s okay because he can’t resist yours either.

You and Kiro’s guttonness and cutesy manipulative ways towards one another can sadly only go on for so long before the fun comes to a painful hault.

It seems that you two have indulged in a little too much of the sweet treats, leaving you both to most likely take up a very simple yet painful month of dieting. 

Which is then filled to the max with pouty expressions and W words in hopes to just get one cookie from the bakery you passed on your daily run. 

𝓥𝖎𝖈𝖙𝖔𝖗|5/10

The world will NEVER know this side of Victor. 

He would probably throw himself off a bridge if anyone heard him use a cute voice towards you or anyone for that matter.

Even your future children and cute puppies will NEVER witness such a pure and child-like state with your stubborn CEO boyfriend. 

BUT surprisingly enough he has done it a few times.

You always tease him for it since he likes to make fun of you for when you try to use your cute voice to beg for pudding or a longer time for your deadlines. 

And although this tough looking CEO wouldn’t admit it, he likes seeing you pout your lip and add a W to every two words of sentence.

The one and ONLY time victor has ever used the cutesy voice on you was when you were really sick and asking for soup. 

He was caring for you for about a week now with little to no progress of your health improving. 

And aside for all the nagging you were getting from him for overworking yourself he was truly worried about you.

Now that your cold was coming to and end and with Victor in a tired state and comfortable enough to relieve himself of worry, along with being a bit flirtatious (probably from light sips of whisky he had been drinking to keep himself in motion) the cute words just kind of...slipped out...

You are in complete shock as your brain is trying to process what it just heard. 

Did Victor really just say “does my whittle dummy want some swoup?”

Trust me he is just as shocked as you are as he quickly escapes the bedroom with cheeks as red as a cherry.

He is so shocked in fact that it takes you a good three hours to get your soup so he could have some time to regain himself after the embarrassing encounter.

To this day he is still haunted by it as you taunt him every once in a while for it.

*poking his forehead lightly with playful giggles* “Aww, Come on Victor, don’t chu want to mwake me some swoup?” 

“If you have time to bother me then maybe I should consider raising your deadline to three days instead of the end of the week?” 

And with that you scurry out at lighting speed leaving Victor to wallow in his face palmed blushes. 

𝕷𝖚𝖈𝖎𝖊𝖓|8/10

Lucien LOVES the shit out of your cutesy talk.

BUT is probably the only one capable of not letting you get your way with it every time.

He loves to tease you not the other way around! 

His plans would be foiled if just your cute little voice defeated him.

He will however use a cute voice in comparison to yours. 

He likes when you say little words in a cute way like tank you instead of thank you or putting a w in pretty please 

and he will repeat them back to you the same way you said it. In a mocking yet flirtatious kind of way.

After a soft chuckle Lucien looks to you. “Pweety Pwlease?” He questions as you puff your cheeks at the fact that he doesn’t seem phased by your cuteness.

His eyes however, quiver with complete delight at just how cute you are to him.

Your Scorpio boi can only hide his feelings for so long and despite his calming expression his eyes alone can only hold what is truly running through his brain. 

There are times the Professor falls victim to your cute ways but they usually end in some more...explicit moments with you. 👀

You learn rather quickly that this seems to be one of the very few things you have in control over Lucien, unlike the multiple ways he has control over you. 

Though, your ways of manipulation are nothing to take lightly either. 

Lucien seems to be really focused with work right now. Staying up all day and all night eyes glued to books or his tablet filled with words that just give you a bit of a headache.

And despite not hating Lucien’s passion and hardworking energy towards his career you are now starting to realize that it’s been almost a month since you have been close and intimate with him.

So much so that you can’t even remember what his gorgeous body looks like under all that lab coat. 

And desperate times call for desperate measures. 

Setting yourself up into cutness overdrive and plopping yourself right down and in front of your boyfriends work and onto his lap 

along with a simple tilt of your head and eyes as wide as the moon doesn’t take long for all the blood to rush to you know where for Lucien. 

And when Lucien falls victim to you he FALLS. but he’s not a man who enjoys failure. (So be prepare for one intense and intimate ride.)

His sex drive and stamina is not something to question and if you sneeze just two octaves higher than normal 

you’ll most likely be attending his lecture with wet, shaking knees. 

𝕲𝖆𝖛𝖎𝖓|7/10

Also loves your baby talk and will say it back to you casually.

It is something that he only does around you though and doesn’t let anyone see.

Gavin is 100% those TikTok videos where the girls are recording their boyfriends cutesy talking to them and then instantly start talking in a deep voice the moment they see the camera. 😂

Will use it a lot when you aren’t feeling good and goes nutso bananas if you use it to reward him.( Kind of like a puppy. 😂)

“Was ywu a tood boyfwriend today? Wes. Wes you were.” *Gives Gavin happy head pats*

Gavin is also a huge sucker for your cute ways and will not hesitate to compliment you on your new hair accessory, the way you did your makeup, or how you added a new watch to match the bracelet he gave you.

He’s actually really good at paying attention to small details despite not being the romantic.

And with this you'll find him getting you cute treats and toys to cheer you up. 

And even if he truly doesn’t quite understand why you are so obsessed and squeal as loud as you can when you see pusheen he can’t say that he hates seeing how excited you get when admiring the cute and simple things of life.

One moment in particular that will always be engraved in Gavin’s head is seeing you hold the chubby grey cat plushie as much as you could in your arms

you were practically swallowed behind it, it was just as big as you were, if not more.

Seeing you walk through the store and doing your best to avoid falling over not daring to let go of the giant fluff ball of cuteness sent a pierce through Gavin’s heart.

How the hell can they be so cute?!? Was the only thought running through Gavin’s head the entire time. 

And once he regained his composure he helped guide you through the store by your arm. 

Sadly you had to part ways with the kitty plushie when a small child became just as in awe of it as you were and knowing she was the last one, handed it over kindly.

Seeing you a bit sad only put Gavin in a low mood before motivating him to an idea.

And with that; a few weeks later a new fluffy, plushie cat as big as your front door awaited the front of your apartment with a cute (is that letter blood stained???) note from Gavin. 

𝐒𝖍𝖆𝖜|-9000/10

Hatesssss! The baby talk with a passion and will not ever use it with you.

You made the mistake to use it on him once and the amount of awkwardness in his expression was overbearing.

The two of you just sat in your apartment blinking wide eyed at one another in silence.

Shaw broke the awkwardness first by just flat out saying “yeah, no.”

And with that you sulked back into your seat realizing that he didn’t seem phased at all by how cute you were.

And for a moment a bit ticked off. I am cute Shaw?! Don’t ignore me like that! UGH! He can be so nerve racking sometimes!!

Despite not being a big fan of the voice, after dating Shaw for a while you have come to find that he doesn’t mind you doing cute things with him like cuddling up together, squishing his cheeks, or rubbing your face on his ect.

Playing with his hair when he’s strumming away on his bass or latching onto his neck when his skateboard slips from under your feet are some of his favorite moments with you.

But the big eyes and pout get him ALL the time!

He will try his best not to be swayed by them especially when the tears seem genuine.

Shaw and your relationship is like when the older sibling hits the younger one and they start crying and the older one starts to freak out. That. That’s you and Shaw. 

𝕭𝖔𝖓𝖚𝖘|𝐒𝖍𝖆𝖜

When he gets drunk he uses the baby talk on you!

Will mumble on his words but tell you just how pretty and cute you are.

But you know that if you bring it up to him he will never drink around you again so you have to keep it as a little secret between you and your friends

You even have recordings and voice messages of him drunk off his ass and calling you just to say.

“Babbbyyyy, I mwissed ywu so muchhh!! Ywu are dhe pwrettiest girl I know and I luv ywu and I just want to kiss your cute wittle face!”

He’s also a very clingy and loving drunk who can’t seem to stop from covering your face in kisses.

It is most definitely a moment in time that you will happily remember for years and years. 

𝕿𝖍𝖆𝖓𝐤 𝖄𝖔𝖚!!! Spookies for giving this a read and for giving me the opportunity to share something fun and light hearted with you guys about all our favorite Evolvers. 

✨ I am hoping that more writings are to come to you guys from me but this is all a fairly new and a bit out of my comfort zone to do haha  so please be patient with me. 

✨ But please be open to comment feedback you may have through this post and In my asks on what you thought about this and if you guys enjoy more bullet point writings like this or would like more of a story style. I would love to hear what you guys have to say!!! 

[aheroinasuit]

Why did you remove this post: [ aheroinasuit(.)tumblr(.)com/post/666234317116227584/personal-opinion-the-qanon-podcast-is-bs-if-i ] .?... You made good points and it should be seen by the wider POI community (many who are now 'cancelling Jim/POI')... I was going to comment something to it, but now...

Hello there.

I turned the post private so I could do some research, & mostly to watch the video.

I've made it public again.

I'll use your ask as an opportunity to share some things. I consider myself a level-headed person who, on principle, is against cancel culture. I also can seperate the artist from the man (American Beauty is one of my favourite movies for example). So, the day I made the post in question it was mostly against the podcast and less about Jim's speech.

We, as a society, or smaller communities, we tend to turn the people we disagree with into monsters. I saw that, instead of criticising the problem in question aka Jim's involvement with Qanon mentality we instantly fell into the rabbit hole of of course he did because he's racist, homophobic etc etc. thus giving him no chance to redeem himself one day. True, I'm not certain he will ever redeem himself, (is redeem even the right word? He committed no crime) but it's not as if we would welcome him with open arms even in the off chance he realises that even if his heart is in the right place, his words were taken as hateful and a call to arms by people already shown prone to such acts (I doubt he's going to change his mind, tbh, but I am still of the opinion he's not a bad person in heart. Maybe I'm biased) in the beginning of the year.

Hypocritical? Maybe. But then again who isn't? The same day everyone was posting about him in twitter, in my feed was a post about using a machete against JK Rowling. I guess that's the correct kind of hating and call to violence. Polarising is visceral these days, partisans left and right pushing at the edges.

After watching the video, I could not understand what the problem was. It was all over the place, in places he seemed more honest than in others, there was an off feeling to it and basically made no sense. Was he promoting his movie? Was he doing something else? Did he even know what he was doing?

As far as I'm concerned the speech isn't the problem per se. The man who hugged him in the end is. Juan O Savin. I had to look him up and the guy is out of this world (and I wonder what that makes the people who think he's JFK-among other things).

So yes, no cancel culture, I think I'll always love and support Jim's acting, but let's be careful here. People fall for these conspiracy theories as if they are honey and the more you read it, you end up in a strange hole where you start questioning your own self...

As for Jim Caviezel, I can go deep into his psychology and make him to be a victim of his upbringing and the echo chamber his environment is, but in the end, everything would be assumptions.

Two more things: I respect Jim's convinctions. However, as he talks about sinners and saints I can't help but remember Christ's "the one without sin throw the first stone". Also, Trump's top rule in life: “Get even with people. If they screw you, screw them back 10 times as hard." That's the man Jim supports. How Christian is that?

I do believe he's against child trafficking and has chosen the wrong people to allign himself with.

Now, I've seen media's manipulation in several matters that I had to do research on my very own to get down to the truth (read actual court documents instead of articles) and most journalists are paid to push an agenda instead of the truth. Make no mistake, I fully understand why people go the other way... and the podcast? That more or less shows a man who is easily manipulated to do what others want has an agenda. So why the lies? We know it was Jim who pushed for the romantic element between John and Joss. We know he's not anti-semitic.

"There’s one book that I read, Man’s Search for Meaning by Viktor E. Frankl. This is a prisoner in Auschwitz. How do you have freedom in Auschwitz? He calls it "internal freedom," and that freedom doesn’t come solely from something physical. The idea that Frankl wrote it is abandonment of what you cannot control and mastering self-control." [source]

" As a young person, I read a lot about Nazism and the genocide carried out by Germans on Polish territory. My knowledge was limited to books, but during my stay in Poland I realized how much Wojtyla must have suffered by being directly exposed to Nazism. I’ve been to Auschwitz where Maximillian Kolbe gave his life as a martyr for a fellow prisoner. It made me realize the scale of suffering of the Polish people." [source]

So in the end, I don't understand what is the point of making up outrageous lies when the issue here is his descent into QAnon mentality?

I can only talk about myself, but when I know without question one thing is a lie I start questioning everything. Why? What for?

Either way, as a non American who loses or wins nothing out of it, I can still admire and find solace in his work. This doesn't mean I cannot understand the people who can no longer do it.

PS. I don’t really think my post will change anything in the grand scheme of things, anon. 

[hustlemeanokay]

Vega's Interview - The People You Know Pt 7 - Final

[Takes place right before or shortly after PNR] Your thoughts on...

Hanako Arasaka, Saburo Arasaka and Yorinobu Arasaka

Okay, I thought long and hard about this one. About what I would say on this because I knew that they'd come up. So, okay, you ready. -sits up a little straighter, cups hands around mouth to amplify sound- FUCK. ALL. THEM. BITCHES. Two down, one to go, I say.

Sandayu Oda

Dunno where he is now, hope he got Goru out, maybe... they split off into... fucking ninja land or somethin'. Maybe got their own version of a happy ending. Dude was wicked fast.

Alt Cunningham

Scary... big... red lady. Just... -gestures above his head- big. Now she's bigger. Like... there was this Goddess, I think... she used to eat people? Kind of. I mean, was it her... or was it... hell, I don't know. Read it in a book somewhere. Point is. Where ever she is, no matter what I think about her, I owe her. Hope she never calls to collect.

Panam Palmer

Panam. When I first found out that I was dyin'... I was pissed. Angry. Who wouldn't be, right? I had a real - fuck the world - attitude. Didn't give a shit if the next gonk took me out, fuck'em. Today, tomorrow, didn't make a shit difference. And I know she'll chase me around camp with this fucking thing if she ever reads it but... I had fucking given up before I met her. No foolin'. But... I saw her and... all that anger inside of me just kind of... twisted itself around into pure, unadulterated, fight. Suddenly... I wasn't okay with divin' head first into shit without thinkin' things through. She said jump, I said how fuckin' high, Panam? Caught a lot of shit over it, too. But I didn't care then and I don't care now. Lovin' someone is lovin' all of 'em, every single part. No matter how flawed... or how rough. She looks at me and it feels like lightning goes... right fuckin' through me. And I don't think that'll ever change. Sometimes, I can't believe this is real. From a nightmare to a dream. And she did that for me. She'd scoff at that, say I was being a big ass gonk. But she'd get a small smile on her face. She may not pour her heart out or weep or any of that prissy shit. But she makes sure I know where she stands. All the little things she does... small things like... savin' me the last seat at the table. Stuffin' a sandwich in my pack when I head out, even if it's all squished... callin' back to camp when she's not gonna make it back in time... pulling herself tighter against me when she thinks I'm asleep. All these things she does to tell me she loves me. Fuck, I hate the idea of leaving her here when I go. Nothing else scares me more than that. And nothin'... nothin' else hurts more than that. I see the hope in her eyes when she talks about Tucson and it just… shreds, ya know. Sometimes I think… maybe I should have just kept my distance. Saved her from this. She’ll probably pop me one for sayin’ that.

and finally, Robert John Linder aka Johnny Silverhand

Johnny Fuckin' Silverhand. God what a fucker. A piece of work. One second, he acted like a total piece of shit, a son of a bitch. The next... he'd be my rock. I hate how it had to go down. If I had known that the end result out here was gonna be the same then... fuck, doesn't matter. I just hope that he knew how I felt. I think he did. Sometimes, I'll still wake up sharp, seeing his face above me, feel his hand on my shoulder as he pushed me down into that well, tellin’ me to keep fightin’. So many people thought they knew him. Rogue, Kerry... even Alt. And ya know what? None of them did. They didn't know shit. It wasn't his memories that let me know him. It was the echoes. His feelings... his thoughts. Knowing how much it hurt him to hear people call him an asshole. Knowing how... he was mean, angry because he was so fucking scared all the time. Scared of fading away, of being forgotten like so many of them guys were when he went to war. Hell, even he couldn't remember their faces anymore. Scared him shitless. And it made him angry, which made him mean. Made him drink, do pills, drugs, whatever he could. Just to try and chase the shadows away. It never worked. He'd start getting close to someone and then push 'em away as cruelly as he could. If he hurt them, they couldn't hurt him. Fucking gonk logic. But one that still rolls around the face of the earth and probably always will. He didn't even love Alt, not really. It was his own short-comings that made him set that chain in motion, hating himself for letting it happen and then later, for doing something so fucking stupid. Better to burn out than fade away. And now, no one knows who he was. That hurt him the most. But I sure as shit will never forget him. I hope he knows that, wherever he is.

[anothermrvictormoron]

Hello guys! I just figured out something during quarantine and thought "Why not posting it?". Here is my first headcon about the boys of the anime game play "Mr Love Queen's Choice" . I hope that u're enjoying it as much as I did while writing it! Requests are welcome so please let me know what u want to read at my page in the future ! Stay healthy!!

Their reactions when they find out that MC is smoking

Victor:

+ Oh hell no trouble is incoming

+ Definitely recognise it pretty fast *he recognises the slightest change of your behaviour, movements, gaze and even your smell so don't even try to hide it*

+ Would be very furious bc he wouldn't let u harm ur body in any way

+ Worries about u althought he wouldn't admit it

+ "How can you be so dumb and risk your life like that? I won't accept that."

+ Lecturing u all day and night about what you're doing to your body *he's doing it bc he really cares for you and loves you so don't be too mad*

+ Begging for him to stop his lectures won't help u

+ Will find all cigarettes you're trying to hide from him

+ Will find even the hardest hideouts

+ Seeing the doctor will be part of ur day

+ He'll make sure that u're going to that appointment

+ But may god be with you when he finds u smoking a cigarette

+ Would probably slap the cigarette out of your hand and crush it under his feet

+ Run.

+ He wouldn't give u any cash for cigarettes

+ "I'm not funding ur addiction, moron."

+ Would even change his pin if u're even thinking of stealing his black card

+ Would force u to go to one of the best and most expensive detoxification clinic he can find *if necessary*

+ When he's at work he would call u more often to make sure that u're not smoking

+ Would even force Goldman to spy on u when u have ur break *he doesn't get paid enough for this*

+ U would recognise it pretty fast bc Goldman isn't the type for such things *still doesn't get enough paid for this*

+ "Victor why was Goldman's car quickly driving off when I got out of the building to have my break?"

+ "Dummy, otherwise i would worry. I can't always be by our side to stop ur shenanigans."

Gavin:

+ He would recognise it from the start

+ It's hopeless to hide or deny it *birdcop knows everything*

+"You know what you're doing to you body, right?"

+ Would try really hard to convince u to stop smoking

+ Getting upset and nervous when he sees u smoking one of this health destroying things

+"What was the trigger that led u to smoking? U wanna tell me?"

+ He wouldn't have even thought for a second that a person like u could start smoking

+ "How long have you planned to keep this a secret from me?"

+ Would definitely talk with u a lot about it all day

+ Hardly trying to understand why u're smoking

+ If necessary he would force u to hand him out all your cigarettes to prevent u from any damages u could get from smoking

*beeing overprotective*

+ Trying to search something you could replace smoking with

+ He would tell Minor to keep an eye on u when he's not around *althought Minor isn't the best choice for him*

+ Minor: "Uhh okay so...what should I do when she's smoking a cigarette?"

+ "I don't know just do something."

+ When he's at work he pays a bit more attention to his phone

+ If Minor is sending him a message prepare urself for a looooonnngggg conversation when he's home

+ "Then stop her immediately! I don't care how just do something!"

+ Minor while freaking out "Okokok I'll do my best bro!"

+ Relieved a bit when Minor was successful

+ At home pulling u onto his lap while having a looonnnggg conversation

+ Confessing to u that he told Minor to keep an eye on u

+ "Pumpkin don't be mad. I just want u to be healthy."

Lucien:

+ He knows it right from the start

+ Isn't really pleased about it

+ "U wanna tell me why u've decided to smoke? Maybe I can help u."

+ Worries about your health

+ Would explain u every detail about what one cigarette could actually do to ur body while drinking a cup of ur favorite tea with you

+ Hoping that u think about quitting to smoke by telling u everything that could happen to ur body when u don't quit it *when i say EVERYTHING, I mean EVERYTHING*

+ Even scares u by telling u all these scary things he knows *if necessary*

+ Keeping an eye on u when he's around u

+ "U don't smoke a cigarette, do u?"

+ Taking it out of ur hand to crush it in an ashtray

+ Would find any hideouts with cigarettes *U're an open book to him so no chance to hide them*

+ Scary but he knows when u're smoking at work and sends u a message when u do so

+ "U're enjoying ur break?"

+ U're wondering if he did hire someone to spy on u but u couldn't figure out someone *actually he's the one observing u *

+ Feeling a bit weird by that thought

+ "Would he do something like that?"

+ U couldn't manage to hide it by ur visits at the orphanage

+ "Miss why are u smelling like smoke every time u come here? Are u smoking?"

+ "Uh...uh uhm y-yeah but please don't tell Lucien about it! He would get angry if u would tell him!"

+ The kids would at first shut their mouth about it but u think Lucien would be that naive and dumbfounded? *Haha guess what*

+ The kids are telling him what u're doing when u come here because they're royal to him and love him so much *also because he promised them to bring some candies the next time he comes to the orphanage *

+ "Silly, u think u could have hide it from me?"

Kiro:

+ Wouldn't even dare thinking of u smoking a cigarette

+ Not his beloved Miss Chips!! *protecting mode activated*

+ As he's actually seeing u smoking he can't believe his eyes *blinking several times**Kiro.exe stopped working for a moment*

+ "Miss Chips you're smoking?"

+ Would be worried sick of u and our health

+ Would do anything to provide u from smoking

+ Would even write a song about it if he feels like it

+ Asking u every day how you feel

+ Panicking a bit bc he doesn't know what he could/should do

+ "You should definitely quit smoking MC. It would be best for you."

+ You actually think about stopping to smoke just for him but it costs a lot of discipline

+ He would love to help and support you by quitting to smoke

+ Being very moody

+ Secretly throwing them into the trash can or hiding them so u're not able to smoke even a single one

+ Even hiding the ashtray and the lighters if necessary

+ "Kiro where are my cigarettes?? And even my ashtray and my lighters are gone?!!"

+ "I won't tell u! U should care about your health more!"

+ Missing ur sweet smell when he buries his face onto ur shoulder when u're hugging each other

+ Does even hate u a bit for starting to smoke *pout pout pout*

+ Would sneak off of work to surprise u at ur lunch breaks if he manages that Savin won't notice it

+ "Come on MC u don't need cigarettes in ur life...You just need me!"

+ "I just need them to calm down Kiro! They aren't as important as u!"

+ Taking u into a big embrace and actually kinda happy u said that into his face

+ Making sure u're alone as he places some ass sweet kisses onto ur lips *being a bit overwhelmed but very happy*

+ " U're also very important to me and that's why I'm doing this things...u understand that?"

[whiskey-bumblebee]

Hello lovely! After 5 weeks of being trapped in the house I wondered if I could request a bit of escapism with some holiday romance with Pale? Many, many thank-you’s in advance!

Same here pal! Sheesh, I know I’m an introvert but 4 weeks of lockdown has been interesting to say the least! That said, I hope you enjoy this!

Jump

Pairing: Pale/Reader Word Count: ~2000

Pale tossed and turned for weeks over it, your first holiday together. Wanted it to be a surprise but a good one, didn’t want to fuck it up. Looked at Cuba, Puerto Rico, the Bahamas, even Alaska. You’d been working yourself to the bone recently, deserved some time off. 

There was a TV Pale walked past every now and again when he was working his ass off too, and sometimes he’d see some blonde on a boat, singing about the wonders of cruising. It looked a little bit like hell, being stuck on a boat that long, but once he started reading about it, it started looking pretty fucking good.

Entertainment on board, it wouldn’t be Broadway but hell, with your lips around his cock in the back row it didn’t matter, did it? All your meals cooked for you, buffet and fine dining options, sun loungers out on a deck somewhere, docking at a tropical island for the day and snorkelling, whatever you were meant to do on an island.

“Baby, do you gotta minute?”

“Mhm, what is it?”

“Could you get some time off work if you asked real nice? Just a week or so?”

“Probably,” You started to smile and walked over to Pale from where you had been doing your eyebrows in the bathroom. “And by probably, I mean yeah, I’ve been savin’ my vacation days.”

Pale pulled you down into his lap, kissed under your ear. “How’s a vacation sound then?”

“Sounds good, what do ya wanna do?”

“You,” Pale smirked. “I was just thinking I’d do ya somewhere different.”

You rolled your eyes with a smile. “Where have you booked?”

“Haven’t yet, wanted to check with you first and make sure you wouldn’t hate it or nothin’. You seen those big fuckin’ cruise ships that take you outta Miami?”

“Yeah,” You started to light up, getting all excited.

Pale stroked the side of your face. “How about one of those? Eatin’ and fuckin’ and swimmin’ in the bright sunshine all day. Sounded real nice to me.”

“Where to?”

“Jesus you ask a lotta questions. Don’t gotta be to nowhere, they started selling trips where you just sit and get fed and look out the window and don’t stop anywhere, but wouldn’t that be awful? Anyway the Bahamas or something, a day in Cuba, I think I’d like Cuba.”

“Baby, at the moment even Cubans don’t like Cuba,” You teased, played with your man’s hair. 

“Then we stay on the boat the whole day and fuck, go to shows, go swimming, dancing, whatever. Fuck if I care.”

But you could tell he did care, he’d gone to so much trouble to research all this for you. Knew all the answers to all your questions, had a million ideas about what the two of you would do.

“I’m in, should I pack?”

Pale smiled wide, wider than you’d seen in a while. “Yeah, pack.”

* * * * * * * * 

The flight had been fine, New York to Miami. Pale had rented a car so the two of you could drive around for a few hours before your ship left. Miami looked so alive, crawling with rollerbladers, men kissing men and all sorts.

“Fuckin’ hot as hell. Gonna jump in the pool just as soon as we get on the boat.”

“Same here. Do ya think I have to wear a top?” 

Pale glanced at you and you shot him a wink. 

“You better, Jesus Christ. Think I’d die of heat stroke and a heart attack at the same fuckin’ time. Wouldn’t even fit on my death certificate.”

You couldn’t help but laugh at your man, complaining even now, even here.

“Pale, I love you so goddamn much.”

“Yeah, yeah. Still don’t get it but I believe ya.”

You were quiet for a moment then, content to listen to the pop on the radio. Pale had ceded and let you play the billboard hits for an hour or so while you were driving. It had to be quiet but it made you laugh, seeing this tough grumpy man driving through the neon streets of Miami with Van Halen playing.

“Do you miss Miami?”

Pale was quiet, drummed his fingers across the steering wheel as he thought.

“Some of it.”

You nodded, knew if he wanted to talk about it, he’d keep going on his own.

“The coke here is cheaper, but the cops are all over it. Weather’s good but it gets boring. College kids all over the damn place sometimes. It’d be nice to see my kids more. Nice to have the beaches nice and close. You know, normal shit.”

You nodded and rested your head on his shoulder. 

“You wanna go and say hi to them while we’re close?”

Pale turned his head slightly to kiss your forehead. “Where do you think we’re going?”

You sat upright then, looked at him, surprised.

He smiled. “Yeah I wanna see ‘em. We only got an hour or so left so the missus can’t get too wound up, I’ll be in and out.”

“Am I... Do you want me to-”

“Nah, I’m gonna drop you at the mall if that’s okay. Don’t want you to see it, she gets pretty loud.”

You nodded and went back to resting on his shoulder. “You want anything?”

“Pack of cigarettes, don’t know what else we’re allowed to take. Maybe some Twizzlers.”

You wrinkled your nose. “That your holiday food?”

Pale hummed in affirmation. “Yeah. Helps me get rid of all the tension in my jaw ‘cos it’s like eating rubber.”

You smiled, picturing a younger Pale chowing down on a pack of Twizzlers, chewing real hard.

* * * * * * * * *

“C’mere, you’re gonna get all fuckin’ pink on your shoulders.”

“Pale do you got a timer set or somethin’? You’ve been at this every hour on the hour,” You teased.

“It’s hotter out here than it is in New York. You’ll burn easier, just wanna take care of ya.”

“What time do you wanna get dinner?”

“Maybe 6:30, show starts at 8 so that gives us time.”

You nodded, melted into Pale’s touch as he rubbed the sunscreen all over your chest and shoulders.

“Do you wanna go to the restaurant proper? I think it’s Italian or somethin’.”

You hummed as you thought of a basket of dinner rolls with fancy little bowls of butter, then spaghetti and pizza. 

“Yeah, sounds real nice.”

“Can you wear the blue dress? That one with the sparkly shit on it?”

You nodded.

“It’ll look real nice with the ocean and the lights and everything reflecting off ya. We could get a photo taken or whatever.”

“We can get it printed nice and big and hang it in the apartment. Can ya let me read my book for a minute, sweetheart? I’m dying to finish this chapter.”

“Alright, alright, I’ll stop being a menace.”

Pale picked up his own book, a thriller. You couldn’t help but let your eyes wander down his torso, following the trail of hair from his bellybutton to the band of his swim trunks. 

“You know, we might need to go back to the room for a snack,” You said under your breath. “Getting a little peckish.”

Pale glanced at you over his book. “Oh are we?”

You nodded and pulled your lip into your mouth. “Just let me finish the chapter.”

Pale shuffled a little awkwardly and draped his towel over his lap. 

You didn’t even have to look away from the pages of your novel to know what the sound of the towel moving was. 

“Go jump in the cold pool, you menace,” You teased.

* * * * * * * *

The show was great, the costumes were amazing even if the set was sparse. Pale’s hands had wandered more than you could admit without blushing. In the interest of time before the show, you’d skipped dessert. The 24 hour buffet would serve you well.

While you helped yourself to carrot cake, Pale made small talk with the chef dishing the hot food. 

“Shit shift, huh?”

The chef laughed. 

“New Yorker?” His accent gave his own origin away, and you could sense the rapport that grew straight away.

“Yeah, taking a bit of a break with my girl, wanted to get some sun.”

The chef nodded. “It isn’t a great shift but there are always a few schmucks who come for dessert after the show. Real nice to see the stars though, rather see the sunset than work through sunrise on breakfast.”

“Jesus fuck, you guys gotta be up at four or whatever to serve us assholes cornflakes?”

The chef laughed again, a hearty laugh, and you joined Pale, looped an arm around his waist. 

“Thanks for sticking around, sorry to be one of the post-show schmucks.” You said sheepishly.

“Nah, you guys ain’t got nothing to worry about. Nice to meet someone who actually sees me as a human fuckin’ being.”

Pale nodded in commiseration. 

“What do you do in New York?”

“Restaurant industry, actually,” Pale replied.

“No shit! That’s nice. Manhattan?”

“Yeah, 90 percent of the time. Hey, uh, odd favor to ask but any chance I could come into the kitchen and see what’s going on? Must be a helluva lot of food back there, industrial ovens and shit.”

“Yeah, of course man. Let me hook your girl up with some cream though first, cake gets a little dry this late.”

You smiled. “Thank you.”

 * * * * * * *

“Pale, it’s beautiful.”

“Yeah you are.” Pale swooped in for a kiss.

“Careful, sun’s making you all soft,” You smiled.

“Don’t you worry, I’ll be back to normal as soon as we’re back stateside.”

Pale lay out the picnic blanket on the sand. You smiled at the way the wayfarers sat over his nose. 

“So what’s in that bag of yours?”

“That guy I met the other night, the chef, he gave me a bit of bread and some fruit salad. He said it wasn’t enough to save to put out tonight so it would’ve gone to waste.”

“And this?” You laughed as you pulled out a bottle of champagne. 

“Thought you might like a mimosa or somethin’. Gotta stay hydrated.”

You sighed with a wide smile and lay down on the picnic blanket, soaking up the sun and the love you felt for Pale.

“Thank you.”

Reaching out with your eyes still closed, you fumbled to hold his hand. 

“He’s a nice guy. Might help him out with a job or two once we’re back.”

You hummed. “You getting nervous? All that talk about being back?”

“A little. There’s a reason I’m the top dog over there, I’m the only one who can keep that shit all happening like it needs to. Fingers in a bunch of pies and all that.”

“But you’re glad you’re here?”

“Of course sweetheart. Probably would’ve keeled right over if we’d stayed, I needed a break. Can’t say I feel any less tired with how often we’ve been fuckin’, but still.”

You laughed and swatted at Pale with your hat, then moved it back over your face.

“I checked with some of the crew who know this island and they said you’re all good to whip off your top, even out the tan lines. Locals don’t care.”

“Oh really?”

“Yeah, so c’mon, roll over. I’ll untie ya.”

You half-heartedly rolled, enough for Pale to reach the strings of your bikini top.

“Don’t go gettin’ too excited,” You teased.

“Too fuckin’ late, I’m hard as a rock just from seeing you in the bikini.”

You laughed. “Pass me a grape or something?”

You stayed on your front for now, didn’t feel like showing off your tits to the whole beach just yet. Pale took a grape out of the salad and extended his hand over to you. With a deadly smirk on your face, you licked the sweet syrup off his fingers, then sucked the grape out of his grip.

“Baby, that ain’t gonna help my situation.”

“C’mon then, I’ll feed you one.” 

Pale’s eyes widened and you laughed as you pulled a piece of melon from the salad. 

He shook his head with a smile and bit the melon from your fingers. “You’re a terror.”

You laughed again and he couldn’t help but smile at the sound.

“What now?”

You glanced at him from under the floppy sun hat.

“Lovers of New York, Book Two: The Terror Goes Tropical.”

[youreawizardharr]

About Me

Unusual Asks by Luxet

1. Spotify, SoundCloud, or Pandora? 

I never tried spotify before, but I have installed Pandora. I didnt like the app, so I uninstalled it. I listen to soundcloud mostly.

2. Is your room messy or clean?

When I had a room, I kept it clean.

3. What color are your eyes?

It depends. Like, whenever I wore eyeliner and mascara, my eyes took on a green color. Naturally, my eyes are a shade of blue with hints of some kind of color I cant describe.

4. Do you like your name? why?

I love my first and middle names. If you truly want to my name, its Christa. I absolutely despise my surname. I get teased for it...

5. What is your relationship status? 

Uh...single.

6. Describe your personality in 3 words or less?

If you play Otome games, think of Yukimura (IkeSen) or Kyle Ash (IkeRev). I share some similarities with the two of them lmao 😗

7. What color hair do you have?

Brown? Or maybe more of a nutmeg?

8. What kind of car do you drive? color?

I'm old enough to drive, but I cant right now.

9. Where do you shop?

Anywhere, honestly.

10. How would you describe your style?

The only clothes I hate wearing is dresses, skirts, and overalls. I refuse to wear them.

11. Favorite social media account?

It used to be Facebook. However, I had personal issues with some people, so now I'm more active on Tumblr. I also have a Deviantart account but I never post there.

12. What size bed do you have? 

It used to be a twin size...

13. Any siblings?

Due to my past, I dont speak with my brother. I dont even talk to my biological father. As far as I'm concerned, he's just my sperm donor. I always saw my step father as my dad, so my half sister is my sister 😊

14. If you can live anywhere in the world where would it be? why?

I always imagined what it would be like being born and raised in another country.

Somewhere in Europe? Not sure.

15. Favorite snapchat filter? 

I dont use Snapchat nor Instagram...

16. Favorite makeup brand(s)

I rarely ever wear makeup.

17. How many times a week do you shower?

I'm poor, but I do take showers.

18. Favorite tv show?

I have too many to list lmao

19. Shoe size?

I believe its 6 or 7? I'm not sure...

20. How tall are you?

I'm 5'3" (I'm shorter than a shortcake).

21. Sandals or sneakers? 

Sneakers, hands down.

22. Do you go to the gym? 

I'm too lazy to go...

23. Describe your dream date

I never been on a date before, so I'm unsure.

24. How much money do you have in your wallet at the moment?

I'm broke as a door nail.

25. What color socks are you wearing? 

Blue, black and white ankle socks.

26. How many pillows do you sleep with?

I usually sleep with two.

27. Do you have a job? what do you do? 

I have things to do before getting one.

28. How many friends do you have? 

I only have internet friends. Sad, I know.

29. Whats the worst thing you have ever done? 

I...did some bad things.

30. Whats your favorite candle scent? 

It depends.

31. 3 favorite boy names?

I always wanted to name my kid Cameron, for some weird reason. Its a common name.

32. Favorite girl names

I uh...I'm not really sure?

33. Favorite actor? 

Johnny Deep, Adam Sandler, and Jim Carey.

34. Favorite actress? 

Uh I'm not sure.

35. Who is your celebrity crush?

When High School Muscial was a thing, I had a crush on Zack Efron. I was a young teenager back then, so don't judge me, okay?

36. Favorite movie? 

Pirates of the Caribbean, 10,000 B.C, and most historical related movies. I'm a nerd 👌

37. Do you read a lot? whats your favorite book? 

My favorite books are Knight in Shining Armor, Black Dagger Brotherhood, etc.

There is a Viking series I loved. I know one was called Lord of Hawkfell Island, another was called Lord of Raven's Peak, but I cant remember the others.

38. Money or brains? 

Money cant buy everything...

39. Do you have a nickname? what is it? 

Ketchup & Kikka

40. How many times have you been to the hospital?

I always went with my mom. I never got seen or anything. She has asthma, COPD, so yeah.

41. Top 10 favorite songs

If today was your last day - Nickelback

Savin Me - Nickelback

If everyone cared - Nickelback

Hero - Nickelback

Holding onto Heaven - Nickelback

When I'm Gone - Three Doors Down

Never too late -Threr Doors Down

And countless other songs 😂

42. Do you take any medications daily? 

Over the counter medications

43. What is your skin type? (oily, dry, etc)

I have sensitive skin. I cant use certain brands of soap, and I have to be careful when outside, because I get sunburned easily.

44. What is your biggest fear? 

Dealing with people...

45. How many kids do you want? 

At least one. Or maybe two.

46. Whats your go to hair style?

I dont have a style...

47. What type of house do you live in? (big, small, etc) 

Its a secret.

48. Who is your role model? 

I admire my mom.

49. What was the last compliment you received?

I dont take compliments well...

50. What was the last text you sent?

Uh I texted my sister last night.

51. How old were you when you found out santa wasn’t real?

Uh...I knew at a young age.

52. What is your dream car? 

I dont have a dream car.

53. Opinion on smoking?

Its your body, your choice. But I prefer if people dont. My mom suffers from COPD and Asthma. She always contracts Pneumonia. The three of them clashes against eachother, and makes her really ill.

54. Do you go to college? 

I wanted to go, but cant afford it.

55. What is your dream job? 

One that doesnt require interacting with people...

56. Would you rather live in rural areas or the suburbs? 

I live in the country side. Well, kinda.

57. Do you take shampoo and conditioner bottles from hotels? 

I used to, but they're cheap...

58. Do you have freckles? 

I do have moles on various places. I do have freckles on my shoulders, but nowhere else.

59. Do you smile for pictures?

I dont do selfies or anything else...

60. How many pictures do you have on your phone? 

I have two screenshots of Kyle Ash lmao

61. Have you ever peed in the woods? 

Yeah, when I went camping as a kid.

62. Do you still watch cartoons? 

I'm too old for cartoons...

63. Do you prefer chicken nuggets from Wendy’s or McDonalds?

I like my mom's chicken nuggets.

64. Favorite dipping sauce? 

Hot sauce, Salsa, sometimes ketchup.

65. What do you wear to bed? 

Uh baggy clothes?

66. Have you ever won a spelling bee?

I hate presentations...

 67. What are your hobbies?

Writing

68. Do you draw? 

I used to draw, but I suck at it

69. Do you play an instrument?

I suck at playing instruments.

70. What was the last concert you saw? 

Never been to one.

71. Tea or coffee?

I drink both, but more so tea.

72. Starbucks or Dunkin Donuts?

Dunkin Donuts

73. Do you want to get married?

Someday, maybe.

74. What is your crush’s first and last initial?

I never dated anyone before...

75. Are you going to change your last name when you get married? 

Definitely, because I despise my last name.

76. What color looks best on you? 

I'm not one to be fashionable lmao

77. Do you miss anyone right now? 

I miss my aunt. She died years ago...

78. Do you sleep with your door open or closed?

I always slept with my door closed...

79. Do you believe in ghosts?

I did experience paranormal stuff years ago.

80. What is your biggest pet peeve? 

Being ignored, being called a liar, etc, etc...

81. Last person you called?

My sister.

82. Favorite ice cream flavor? 

Uh gelato, hands down.

83. Regular oreos or golden oreos? 

Both of them.

84. Chocolate or rainbow sprinkles? 

Chocolate.

85. What shirt are you wearing? 

Just a plain, ole t-shirt.

86. What is your phone background?

Just something random.

87. Are you outgoing or shy?

Awkward af ._.

88. Do you like it when people play with your hair?

Uh I enjoy personal space.

89. Do you like your neighbors? 

I dont know them, so I cant say?

90. Do you wash your face? at night? in the morning?

Both.

91. Have you ever been high? 

Um, no.

92. Have you ever been drunk? 

Yeah, several times.

93. Last thing you ate? 

Baby lima beans.

94. Favorite lyrics right now?

"No one can be me anyway."

95. Summer or winter? 

Winter. I hate hot weather.

96. Day or night? 

I'm a night owl, so I enjoy nighttime.

97. Dark, milk, or white chocolate? 

I love me some chocolate.

98. Favorite month? 

July, my birthday month

99. What is your zodiac sign

Cancer

 100. Who was the last person you cried in front of? 

My mom.

[cxgan]

Kinktober 2018 Day 2: Begging & Watersports

SHIP: Cegan [Carl Grimes/Negan]

SUMMARY: FILTH. PURE UNADULTERATED FILTH. Companion to my fic Nicotine [modern!au, Carl and Negan in the kink community if you haven’t read it]. Set two years into their relationship. Carl is nasty and likes nasty things done to him and Negan is always happy to oblige.

WARNINGS: watersports (if you don’t know what that is please urban dictionary it and then proceed with caution), age gap (both over 18 tho)

W/C: 1743

A/N: @God I’m so sorry I have strayed so far from your light. loljk I’m not. I originally wasn’t going to put this in the cegan tag because I don’t want y’all to think I’m gross but then I decided ah fuck it. So just deal with my filth and if you don’t like it don’t read it.  ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ 

"Beg for it," Negan's voice echoed off the walls of the bathroom similar to the way it bounced between the spaces of Carl's ribs and filled up his lungs, suffocating him.

The Dominant had always had the ability to make Carl blush - it was something he was really quite proud of much to the boy's dismay... But it had been awhile since he had been able to reduce him to this much of a humiliated mess and the submissive could just tell that the older male was eating it right up. His ever present smug as hell grin was enough evidence of that. He supposed the older male had the right to be a little cocky in that moment - two years together had made it so Carl was very difficult to embarrass after hearing almost every piece of dirty talk Negan had in the book. He still flushed bright red at times and stammered when he didn't know what to say back, but this time... this time he truly was embarrassed instead of just putting on a cute show. Because this was different. This was dirty. And he wanted it.

And god damn it Negan was going to make him beg for it.

"Daddy, please, please don't make me say it," he grit out in a whine, ripping his gaze away from the other man when he couldn't handle looking into that arrogant expression anymore. He was too ashamed at the entire situation. "I already said I wanted to do it," he damn near whispered out. "Why do I have to beg?" The fact that he was naked, on his knees in the shower, bright red and achingly hard for what was to come was horrible enough.

"'Cause maybe I like hearin' that pretty little voice say all the nasty, filthy shit that I know goes on in that noggin'a yours." To emphasize his point, he leaned down and literally knocked on the top of Carl's head which made the boy shoot a daring glare up at him. "Oh boy, wouldn't look at me like that if I were you. Not in your position. I'll fuckin' make ya drink it if ya piss me off enough. Heh. Get it. Piss me off?" Carl would have shot him another glare for the stupid pun but was a little more scared of the ramifications so he kept his expressions to himself, opting to count the lines in the stone beneath his knees as a more solid distraction. "Now do what I fuckin' said."

"Please," Carl started, voice raw and wavering just a little bit. For a moment he almost considered pleading with the man again to not say it but he knew he had to if he was going to get what he wanted. He stared at the thick leather boots before him and gnawed at the inside of his bottom lip. "Give me..." he continued, nails digging into his flesh where his hands rested on his thighs. "Your... p-piss..." the last word was stuttered out, his voice barely above a whisper as he clenched his eyes shut. This was so humiliating. Wrong on so many levels. So why was his dick harder than ever where it rested flush up against his belly? He had been humiliated a lot over the last few years in the older male's company, but this... this was on a whole new level.

"Sorry, what? Couldn't quite hear ya there, sugar. You're gonna hafta speak up. And fuckin' look at me when you're talkin' - you know damn well I hate that shit."

Carl whined in frustration - a low, pathetic sound that forced it's way up his throat without warning. He steadied his breathing and tried to focus his vocal cords into properly working this time. He cleared his throat and finally opened his eyes to look up at his Dominant, trying his best not to glare at the smirk he was met with. "Please piss on me, Daddy," he said softly. It was louder this time, a little more sure of himself but no less embarrassed by what he wanted.

If it was possible for Negan's grin to grow it definitely did. Carl tried to hold back his whimper at the sound of the older man undoing his belt and jeans. "See, was that so hard, baby doll? All ya had to do was admit how much of a dirty fuckin slut you are and Daddy'll give ya what ya need." He tugged his half hard cock out of his underwear and the boy instinctively licked his lips, wiggling his ass in anticipation. Negan chuckled, stroking himself a few times just to tease the kid. "Gonna be a lot. I've been savin' it for ya." And if it was possible for Carl to turn a darker shade of red, he did.

"Here it comes," Negan grunted, positioning himself over the boy. The hot, yellowed stream of piss fell from the man's cock head like a god damn waterfall, and Carl whimpered when it struck his chest. It streamed down his torso, coating him in the wet warmth and his hand twitched against his thigh. Negan seemed to notice, though, and grunted out a quick, "Go on and touch it, boy." And almost immediately he wrapped said hand around his aching (and now dripping) cock.

Negan had been right, there was... a lot. So much that Carl was surprised it was still coming (not that he was complaining). It was so wrong. So dirty and horrible on so many levels but that just turned Carl on more. He pumped himself eagerly as the stream continued to splash against his chest and trickle downward, covering his hand and cock in the process before dripping off of him and sliding down the drain.

The humiliation of it all was overwhelming. He had never felt more filthy in his entire life than he did in that moment, jerking off like a fucking teenager while his Dominant relieved himself all over him. "Yeah, you love this shit, don'tcha, kid? Fuckin' nasty. My dirty little slut, playin' with his teeny cock while Daddy pisses all over him." Carl moaned at his words, and without much thought or warning his head fell forward and the stream was directed toward the top of his head, soaking into his hair and dripping down his face when he finally looked back up. "Oh, Jesus Christ!" Negan exclaimed, clearly shocked that the boy had gone so far. Carl was a bit shocked he did it himself but as the liquid hit him in the face (his eyes now closed, of course) and the scent and feeling took over him he almost came and had to rip his hand away from his dick to stop it. He bucked his hips up and whined at the loss of contact. "You really are a fuckin' dirty whore, god damn, baby. You're fuckin' disgusting - hard as hell and moaning like a little bitch cause I'm pissin' on your face - fuck." The stream faltered for a second and Negan grunted, causing the boy to open his eyes and look up at him curiously. "I ain't done. Open your mouth."

Carl gave him a sharp look followed by one of hesitancy. Yeah, he was gross, but he didn't know if he was that gross. Negan chuckled. "You ain't gotta swallow it - not yet at least - but c'mon, you just made me piss on your face. Ya can't tell me you don't wanna taste it." Maybe it was curiosity that had him slowly opening his mouth, maybe it was the fact he just trusted the man above him with everything he was. Regardless of what compelled him to do it, he closed off his throat and braced himself for what was to come.

The stream that started up was slower than before, and the moment his mouth was filled up he spat it out rather harshly, coughing and gagging. He didn't know if it was the taste or the action that he thought was more vile but whatever the case he spit it out as soon as he could. Negan, the useless prick, laughed above him. "Aw, c'mon, sugar, it ain’t that bad." Carl glared at him and wiped his mouth off. "You'll get used to it." He was met with a sultry wink that had his stomach flip flopping at the prospect.

The older man finished himself off on Carl's chest and the boy resumed his furious pumping of his own cock. Exhaling in relief, Negan tucked himself back in his jeans and Carl was a bit disappointed he didn't have his dick to look at anymore. "Can I...?" Carl managed to get out, slumping to the side and pressing his head into the stone wall of the shower. He was literally dripping with urine, that fact both making him a little nauseous and spurring him on even more.

Negan ignored him and walked in place a few times, his boots squelching. "Fuck, this is disgusting." He bent over and with practiced hands undid his boots in under a minute, stepping out of them and out of the shower itself to protect his socked feet. "Cum on those," he gestured toward the boots he left next to the boy. "And then clean the fuck out of them. First with your mouth, then with whatever. I don't give a fuck. If you do a good enough job there might be a reward. And then take a fuckin' shower." Carl was nodding along like a damn robot, less focused on what he was instructed to do and more on the fact he had been given permission to cum. On Negan's boots, nonetheless. And then lick them clean. Was he in heaven? Probably.

"Be a good boy, and then come find me when you're done. Alright?"

He was a bit sad the man wasn't staying for the show but at this point he wanted him to leave so he could get on with it. "Yes, Daddy," he grit out, grip tightening around his cock.

The shower door slowly closed but it opened one last time last minute. "And Carl?" The boy looked up, eyes glossy and biting his bottom lip. "I always knew you were secretly a piss slut." And with that he shut the door, leaving the boy to almost immediately start cumming and yelping when he almost missed his target.

TAGGING: NO ONE OMFG I am not subjecting my readership to this filth if they do not want to read it. k thx.

[xserpx]

Another one!

‘That’s far enough,’ said the big man. A calm voice, very deep, very slow. How could he be calm? How could anyone be calm ever again?

I also loved this moment as one of those times someone thinks about random frivolous nonsense while chaos is happening right then:

She’d cut her palm, somehow, torn two of her fingernails half-off, was leaving blood on everything she touched, dabs and smears of it across her petticoats. That would be hell to get out. Hell to get out. She had to get out.

I love seeing thoughts evolve in real time.

Savine is pretty damn great, aside from all the child labour, which still turns my stomach to read, but I also love that tension between her better judgement (moral) and her actual judgement (financial). I think many of the choices she makes in TTWP are similar; consequences don't matter as long as the machine works, until she's actually caught in the gears herself, which is literally what happens in Valbeck. I remember the first time I read this I didn't love it, and I still think the Little People chapter's pacing is kind of all over the place, but I really do love Savine's trial to escape, and especially that it's not just as simple as tasting her own medicine like she deserves it. There's some of that schadenfreude, undoubtedly, but it's also demonstrating how messy the revolution will become, how the purpose is different from one person to the next, and how when rich & powerful people are reduced to an even playing field - even ones you have every reason to hate - we end up feeling empathy while witnessing that real suffering, and that's probably a good thing actually.

I swear I say this every time I re-read an Abercrombie book, but this book has gone up in my estimations since last time.

She wondered if he sponged the muck on as artfully as her maids did her powder, to arouse just the right amount of sympathy. Clean children need no charity, after all.

— Savine dan Glokta, A Little Hatred by Joe Abercrombie

Love how Savine thinks absolutely everyone thinks the same way she does. She's so disconnected from reality. God forbid her feelings of sympathy for children in poverty be genuine, or that she might have to acknowledge her responsibility for bringing that poverty about. No, no; it must instead be that the kid is trying to scam her in some way.

[choochoo284]

Tagged

I was tagged by the lovely @pocketwishes

Rules: Tag 10 people you want to get to know better (I only kinda talk to the person who tagged me soooo I’m not going to tag anyone)

Star Sign: Aquarius

Height: 5′8

Put your playlist on shuffle and list the first four songs to come up:

Staring at the Stars By Passenger

Monster by Skillet

Major Minus by Coldplay

Savin’ Me by Nickelback

Grab the nearest book and turn to page 23, what’s on line 17?

I never thought I’d die like this....

Ever had a poem written about you? Not as far as I know.

When was the last time you played the air guitar? Probably a few years ago

One sound you hate and one sound you love: I absolutely hate the sound when someone bites their nails when they are sitting right next to me and it’s quiet so you can really hear it. I love the sound of rain and leaves rustling.

Do you believe in ghosts: I am fairly open minded about it but I would definitely believe if I see something

Do you believe in Aliens: There must be live out there on another planet somewhere.

Do you drive and if you have you gotten into a car crash: I do drive and I haven’t had a crash yet but I have had a few close calls.

Do you like the smell of gasoline: I don’t mind it in small amounts.

Last movie you’ve seen: Mama Mia 2.

Worst injury you ever had: I haven’t had any really bad injuries... But I would say it’s a toss up between the time I almost fell out of a old tractor and the back wheel scraped some of the skin off my back. Or the time I tried jumping over a small pallet of potatoes and I didn’t quite clear it and I slammed onto a concrete floor and grazed both knees, my hands and my chin, possibly blacked out for a minute and probably had concussion.

Have you got any obsessions rn? Reading Kendler and John Luther/Justin Ripley fanfics (Whitechapel TV show & Luther); 

Do you hold grudges? Yep I can do, but it is dependent on what they did.

Are you in a relationship? Haha no

[byakushisakura-rp]

Get To Know The Mun

RULES: tag ten followers you would like to know better (if you want to). 

Tagging: @akumanoken @verratenduo @dunwhich @kurogane-no-shounen @moonxsuncelestials(anyone else who wants to)

TAGGED BY: @roleplayingspinosaurus

NAME: Sam

STAR SIGN: Cancer

HEIGHT: 5′ 6″

WHAT’S YOUR MIDDLE NAME?: Louis

SHUFFLE. WHAT ARE THE FIRST 6 SONGS THAT POPPED UP?

1. If I Fall - Doc Walker

2. Savin’ Me - Nickelback

3. You Were Mine - Dixie Chicks

4. Because of You - Kelly Clarkson

5. Last Day of My Life - Phil Vassar

6. Stan - Eminem

GRAB THE BOOK NEAREST YOU AND TURN TO PAGE 23. WHAT’S LINE 17?

"On the way to my bedroom I passed Charlie grinning maniacally and shooting his way out of another felony.”

EVER HAD A POEM OR SONG WRITTEN ABOUT YOU? Nope

WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME YOU PLAYED AIR GUITAR? 2007 I think, that was the last time I went to a school dance, I don’t remember doing it any other time.

WHO IS YOUR CELEBRITY CRUSH? Lori Loughlin from Full house

WHAT’S A SOUND YOU HATE; SOUND YOU LOVE?

Love: Nature

Hate: Most loud noises, but I really hate when you’re in a crowd of people and everyone is talking.

DO YOU BELIEVE IN GHOSTS? No, there has been no proof and logically it doesn’t make sense

HOW ABOUT ALIENS? Yes, although there has been no proof of aliens either it’s not logical that out of the many planets in all the solar systems earth is the only one thats inhabited.

DO YOU DRIVE? Yup, got my own car bout 2 years ago

IF SO, HAVE YOU EVER CRASHED? No, that pole crashed into me

WHAT WAS THE LAST BOOK YOU READ?  re-reading Percy Jackson and the Olympians

DO YOU LIKE THE SMELL OF GASOLINE? Sometimes

WHAT WAS THE LAST MOVIE YOU SAW? The Aviator, specifically the 1985 version with Christopher Reeve

WHAT’S THE WORST INJURY YOU’VE EVER HAD? Fractured my leg when I was 3, slipped on a toy in the bath tub.

DO YOU HAVE ANY OBSESSIONS RIGHT NOW? anything to do with my switch, legend of zelda, and superman is an eternal obsession.

DO YOU TEND TO HOLD GRUDGES AGAINST PEOPLE WHO HAVE DONE YOU WRONG? sometimes I guess, depends how attached I was to the person and what they did, if they hurt my friend I would never forgive them, but if they hurt me I would probably get over it.

IN A RELATIONSHIP? never been in one

[celticbarb]

⚔️🏴󠁧󠁢󠁳󠁣󠁴󠁿⚔️BOOK📚REVIEW⚔️🏴󠁧󠁢󠁳󠁣󠁴󠁿⚔️

Book: The Highlander’s Pirate Lass

By Heather McCollum

Series: Brothers of Wolf Isle , Book #2

Publisher: Entangled

Release Date: August 23, 2021

Overall Rating: 5/5 stars ⭐️

Blog Review: 5/5 Saltire Flags 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁳󠁣󠁴󠁿

1422 Ulva Isle Is the Norse name for Wolf Isle.

The premise of this series is that this clan is cursed by an old crone. The first Macquarie Chieftain, got a lass pregnant with no offer of marriage and married another due to a clan alliance. Well this lass was so broken she took her own life. So her powerful witch mother cursed the entire Macquarie clan to stop creating illegitimate children forcing them in a cruel world alone. Now they won’t be able to populate and get any lass pregnant, not until the clan really comprehends what true love really is! Plus the mates they chose can’t be from illegitimate births or again the curse can’t be broken, However this includes all Macquarie properties and everyone living on them will live in infertility and contagious illness. Plus it will affect every living thing not just the clan, but also the livestock and harvest as everything will die and nothing will exist. It will be a cold, miserable, barren, existence!The witch then stuck her blade into the tree covered in blood which made the tree cry forever for the Macquarie clan of Ulva Isle! This tree can’t be cut down or remove the dagger or they would be cursed forever and never have any chance for love and to populate with bairns. Now things were starting to change as the oldest brother Adam married Lark and the first buds appeared on the tree. It was a start and the next chapter begins centering on Beck Macquarie….

Scotl,and, 1547

This book centers on Beck Macquarie who doesn’t really believe in this ridiculous family curse. The only things he loves is his brothers Adam, Callum, Drostan, Eagan, and sister-in-law Lark, his clan and the boat he name The Calypso. He had been building with his own two hands for the past two years with all the love in his heart! Now he is a pirate hunter with his speed worthy boat. The thing he hates most is pirates, especially the notorious Claude Jandeau who abducts and brutalizes women and children and sells them into slavery! He nearly did that to his sister-in-law Lark two years ago (The Highlander’s Unexpected Proposal) but luckily they got her in time! He has been trying to catch this slippery weasel Jandeau to kill him with no success!

On Eilean Mòr Isle in the Sound of Jura, Beck meets the beautiful Erica Wentworth and her small entourage who is near starving! This is her family not by blood, but still a family. This family consisted of the middle aged Alice, thirteen year old Anders, eight year old Pip and Hester who was about three years old. Each of them were rescued by the pirate who is like a father to Erica, Captain John Pritchert, another privateer, for King Henry of England. He had saved Erica at twelve years of age, after the wicked Pirate Jandeau and his crew of fifty evil pirates on his ship, The Borreau, that brutally murdered her parents right in front of Erica! Jandeau was planning on selling Erica into slavery and Captain John luckily saved her. Captain John even killed two of his own crew who tried to later attack her! Even though Erica was in shock, she feels very guilty for not saving her baby brother who was also a prisoner she assumes on Jandeau’s ship! She has no idea if her brother who was three years old is dead, alive or a slave! Because of this Erica has dedicated her life to helping saving other lost children.

Beck sees Erica doesn’t trust easily and lies easily, but she is different than any other woman he has ever met. Not that he has met many woman living on Wolf Isle! Erica doesn’t trust men at all after all she has been through in her young life . Yet notices how different Beck is than most men, besides being drop dead gorgeous! She is so worried about Captain John and his crew on his ship, The Devils Blood, as they should of picked her up by now. Besides the fact they were near starving.

Beck saves Erica and her entourage and brings them to Wolf Isle, the attraction between Beck and Eliza is quite obvious. As they are like a moth to a flame and the chemistry between them is sizzling hot! Erica decides she wants the honorable Beck Macquarie to teach her about passion and give her lessons in bed. As Eliza doesn’t want to ever get married and be any man’s possession. Beck knows he can’t get her pregnant or he might curse his family forever. They both want Jandeau dead! The one thing Jandeau wants is Erica, the one that slipped through his fingers and soon Eliza is going to have to make a decision between the free and secure life she has lived or sacrificing everything for the people she loves! What shall she choose?

As Beck and Erica are like a a moth to a flame, for these star crossed lovers this attraction turns into love. Can Beck convince this Lass who might have some royal British bloodlines to stay with him forever? A Lass who curses like a sailor, who is more comfortable in sailors clothes than in frilly dresses and petticoats. A woman who loves the freedom of the sea and the spray of the ocean breeze as much as Beck, Except Erica tries to steal the one thing he loves as much as his family. Is it the ultimate betrayal? Does Erica ever find out what happened to Captain John the man who is like a second father to her and his missing pirate crew? Does she ever discover the fate of her baby brother and will she ever forgive herself for not saving him? Will Jandeau ever get his hands on the beautiful Erica to torment and pillage? Can Beck convince Erica to stay with him on Wolf Isle and let him love her forever? Read and find out the answers of so many questions in this breathtaking story!

I have been a long fan of this author Heather McCollum’s for over five years and have read and loved every book she has ever written to be honest. Yet this book absolutely blew me away! It is definitely her best work in my opinion. A book I definitely could not put down! It has everything readers will love: a swoon worthy hero, a heroine who has witnessed many horrors in life yet has a worthy goodness in her and a gentle heart. A black hearted evil villain that will give you chills and squirm in your seat! Plus the wonderful Macquarie family that you want to just become a part of.

Now if you want to talk about plotting this had plots within plots where I definitely was holding onto my seat and gasping for air! Definitely was causing some heart palpitations in this reader as I was swept away in a definite literary masterpiece that I absolutely wholeheartedly loved! These characters both good and bad are absolutely awe inspiring and unforgettable. It is one of those books you don’t want to see end! Probably one of my favorite books that I have read in the past decade! Yes I loved The Highlander’s Pirate Lass that much as it was totally brilliant! A book historical readers definitely don’t want to miss! I can’t recommend this book enough as every page from start to finish was an absolute masterpiece! I would give this book a bazillion stars if I could as 5 stars does not seem nearly enough! Woohoo, I am so excited and looking forward to reading Callum Macquarie’s story next in the third book in the Brothers of Wolf Isle series!

Disclaimer: I received an advance reader’s copy from Entangled Publishing. I voluntarily agreed to do an honest, fair review and blog through netgalley. All thoughts, ideas and words are my own.

Buy Links:

https://www.amazon.com/Highlanders-Pirate-Lass-Brothers-Wolf-ebook/dp/B099QJ5GTD

https://play.google.com/store/books/details?pcampaignid=books_read_action&id=7Pc4EAAAQBAJ

https://www.kobo.com/us/en/ebook/the-highlander-s-pirate-lass

https://entangledpublishing.com/books/the-highlanders-pirate-lass

[fanesavin]

Mistletoe & Peppermint Cocoa : Faye + Fane

Faye and Fane exchange some early Christmas presents which involves a miniature treasure hunt around the beach-side cottage.

@faye-andrews

If one thing could be said for the Delacroix household (which is what Fane had come to start calling it) it was that Christmas had certainly struck, or perhaps Fane Savin had struck. Either way, Christmas was definitely here if the tree in the living room, the toy penguin banister slide, the star wars jumper he currently wore and numerous lights outside were anything to go by. All done by himself and a certain little blonde child with whom he was currently entertaining in the lounge by the fire with a large Moana jigsaw puzzle both in possession of a large drink of fresh mint cocoa and plenty of Christmassy decorated biscuits that they had spent the afternoon making and decorating. Currently, Fane lounged on his belly perusing the pieces legs kicked up behind him, glasses balanced on his nose whilst Faye finished up the last of the washing from their early dinner insisting for once he let her do it. Wyn would have to go to bed soon but before that Fane had a little surprise for the both of them. “How long ‘til you’re done love?” he called over his shoulder.

“Just about,” she called, rinsing the last of the soap off the last of the plates and setting them aside to dry. When she was done, she came over to see what they were doing, dressed in her own sweater - not Star Wars . “You think she’d be able to do this one blindfolded by now,” Faye commented as she sat down across from the. Wyn made a giggling ‘ppft’ noise at her mother before holding a piece out to Fane for him to put into place.

Faye tucked her legs up under her chin and watched the two of them. “Maybe Santa will bring you two a different puzzle,” she grinned.

The house was virtually drowning in Christmas cheer. The decorations had been a surprise, and Faye had to admit they were lovely, and Wyn had been utterly tickled over all of it. It was nice, to actually enjoy the holiday instead of feeling morose about it.

Faye glanced at the clock. “Bedtime’s after you finish this up, hm?” she said to Wyn.

“I mean we’re beating our record time for this particular one, but blindfolded would be quite the feat-- Even for this one” he grinned giving Wyn a small nudge in her side that made the toddler giggle prior to taking the piece she offered and fitting it into the overall puzzle the pair had steadily been building between them both. “Though a new set of puzzles would be great wouldn’t it Wyn? Maybe we’ll get a star wars one?” he was joking, kind of, though he had introduced the toddler to the franchise and was glad at least she’d taken an interest in the concept of sci-fi.

Still some work to go, but it was a start at least.

Fane paused to take a sip of his drink licking the cream from his lips when Faye mentioned bedtime, “nah there’s something else that’s got to be done before bedtime that I think she can stay up a little later for.” A little look of mischief glimmered in his eyes as he glanced at Wyn “what if I told you there’s an early Christmas present for you and mummy somewhere? But…” he paused drawing out the moment “I can’t for the life of me remember where I hid it… D’you think you could help me try and find it?”

Faye watched the exchange between Fane and her daughter with nothing less than utter heart eyes. She had a hard time schooling her expression when it came to them, or just to Fane himself. Though even when she managed it, Fane had the uncanny ability to know what she was thinking most of the time. “That’s his way of sayin’ he wants a Star Wars puzzle,” Faye stage-whispered to Wyn, who giggled again.

Her laughter warmed Faye’s heart, as did most everything lately. She was happier than she’d ever been, and while a small part of her was waiting for the other shoe to drop, a bigger part knew that was just old habits dying a hard death.

She raised an eyebrow at Fane as he brushed off bedtime, but it turned to curiosity as he mentioned a gift. Wyn’s eyes lit up, and she nodded. ‘Yes! What is it?’ she signed, sitting up and practically bouncing up and down with excitement, blonde hair flying all about her face.

“Yeah… what is it?” Faye asked, knowing full well that she wouldn’t get an answer since he meant for them to find it first.

Wyn didn’t wait for him to answer, jumping to her feet and tugging him by the hand insistently.

Faye could only give Fane a curious look that said ‘what are you up to,’ and follow along.

“I have no idea what you mean,” he remarked with an indignant look but his grin entirely gave away the fact that he would be entirely happy with such a gift if he did happen to get it or anything else really. Who didn’t like presents anyways? But, his attention was promptly taken by larger things namely the fact that there was indeed a gift to be given to the both of them tonight even if Christmas was a few weeks away.

“Well, I’d tell you if I could remember what it was that I’d gotten you” he remarked with a touch of a laugh echoing in the words. “But I can’t quite remember so…” he scratched his jaw making a show of trying to remember what or where this present might’ve gone.

“But I might’ve left some clues around just in case to find them” he did laugh as he was practically yanked up to his feet by the toddler. Slipping a hand in his pocket he drew out a piece of paper “aha, here we are! Hm, let’s see” he peered at the paper with his writing on it before reading it “I’m packed with boxes and cans, I might hold a broom, or a mop or a dustpan” Eowyn seemed to ponder his words before lighting up and shooting off yanking Fane along by the hand until they reached the small store closet where it just so happened that another piece of folded paper sat. Wyn grabbed it before holding it up and he read the next one, “I make it possible to have fresh food… Everyone agrees I’m a pretty cool dude.”

“‘Course you don’t,” Faye teased. “Maybe if you’re a good boy, Santa will bring you one though.” She tipped an eyebrow at him, mischief glinting equally in her own eyes.

At Fane’s ‘difficulty’ in remembering, Wyn huffed a bit, her toddler impatience getting the best of her even though she was still grinning. When he finally got to his feet, Wyn jumped up and down excitedly at the prospect of a game, especially one that ended in presents.

Faye stood up too, stepping close to see what it was he was up to. Her eyes drifted to Eowyn as her little brow furrowed - striking similar to Faye’s - before she practically dragged Fane towards the closet. Faye followed, wondering just what kind of present required such a lengthy - but no less wonderful and exciting - work up.

At the second clue, Faye watched Wyn think it over for a few moments, her little mind working overtime before she let out a sudden gasp of realization and Fane was dragged towards the fridge where yet another clue was found and held out excitedly for him to read. Faye watched, arms crossed as she leaned against the counter, growing more and more curious.  

“Maybe, maybe he’ll bring me some other toys as well” he joked glancing over in Faye’s direction with an ever so slight eyebrow waggle but it faded as Wyn took his attention and yanked him off on their little quest around the house.

He gave no hints as she figured out the next clue of the lot a gleeful little smile on his lips proving that he was immensely enjoying himself on their little venture to and fro. Wyn got the door to the fridge open and the next clue was within, taking hte paper from the toddler he unfurled it and cleared his throat. “Hm-- Well, my job is to put an end to sleep, which I can do with music, a buzz or a beep-- and mum really hates them as well” he joked shooting a playful little wink at Faye. This one didn’t take the toddler long to decipher and soon enough  Fane was being dragged once more up the stairs towards Faye’s bedroom where the clue was found neatly tucked under her alarm clock.

“Cheeky,” she said, but her mouth turned up in a one-sided grin. She had gotten that one before Wyn, but she let the little girl figure it out as well. They trudged up the stairs and yet another clue was swiped up and held out for Fane to read.

“I rain on you when you need a scrub. I very much like my friend the tub,” he read out loud.

To the bathroom it was, Wyn nearly toppling into the bathtub as she spotted the next note, which read ‘a story they say can take you away, but a book still needs a place to stay.’ Since Faye didn’t have a bookshelf in her bedroom really, Wyn tugged the two adults down the hall to her own room, letting go of their hands to look around her room. She found her favorite storybook sitting on her bed and opened it, shoving the pages aside one by one until she found another bit of paper.

Just as excited about this clue as she had been about the rest, she laughed out loud and held it up triumphantly.

“But true,” he argued with a playful grin happy to see that at least the both of them were curious, though the clues were mostly designed to be simple enough for Wyn to figure out and go around the house on the little hunt he’d set up earlier in the day. He was about to grab Wyn before she toppled head over heels into the tub in her excitement to get the clue chuckling quietly as he stood back and let the toddler bring it to him.

Next came Wyn’s bedroom, and the storybook clue was brought to him, this being the last one of the lot “I’m filled with feathers or other soft fluff, sleeping without me can be quite tough” the toddler who was already by her bed barely needed a second before she spun around and hopped up onto her bed. Diving under the covers as she searched around for the piece of paper that might suggest an answer, it was only when she pulled her pillow aside that an envelope sat atop a neatly wrapped parcel.

Grabbing it with a little cry of excitement she held it up looking at both adults in the room gleefully before she sat down cross-legged to open the card which was addressed to her before she unwrapped the present. Inside being a little soft penguin toy. With Wyn sat looking at the new toy to add to her collection Fane drew out a small card from his pocket looking a little sheepish but no less pleased this addressed to Faye in his neat script and inside being a couple of drawings of the three of them by the Eiffel tower, various other Parisian landmarks and finally the Disneyland castle.

“How’d you fancy a holiday?”

Faye smiled as Wyn opened her present and pulled out the little stuffed toy. Leave it to Fane to make something as simple as a fluff-filled animal into a half hour treasure hunt that had worn out the eager toddler.

But honestly, should she expect anything less at this point?

What she didn’t expect was for Fane to hand her something as well, thinking this had all been set up for Eowyn. “What’s this?” she asked quietly, turning it over and seeing her name on the envelope. Opening it carefully, she unfolded what was inside, and it took her just a moment to realise what she was looking at.

And then he spoke, just as Faye realised what was going on. Her eyebrows rose straight to her hairline, and she turned to look at him, fingers laid gently over the picture of the castle. “Paris?” she asked, the shock and surprise (of the good kind) clearly evident on her face. She turned back to the pictures, realizing now that he had drawn them himself. Her fingers traced the lines of the three figures. “Fane… my God, I…” But she couldn’t make the words come out. He wanted to take them - not just her, but Wynnie too - to Paris? Her throat felt tight, and finally she just turned to him and wrapped her arms around his neck, careful of the pictures she still held in her hand.

“I would love it,” she said against his neck, tears in her voice. She didn’t even bother to tell him he shouldn’t have, because well, he had. And for once, Faye couldn’t bring herself to say anything to the contrary. Paris held special meaning for them, after all. It was where this had all began, in a way. “And I love you… so much…”

This wasn’t just about a single stuffed toy, the toy was simply something for Wyn to get for completing the hunt. The main present was what Faye was holding in her hands right now, and Fane practically vibrated with both his excitement and his anticipation of how it would be received. Faye had told him to stop doing things without consulting her, but honestly this was Christmas and he wanted to take her. Not only her, but Eowyn as well because why would he want to leave her behind?

“An early Christmas present, I told you” he explained patiently watching her closely as she put the pieces together and her look of surprise and shock made him break out in a toothy beaming smile. “Mhm, Paris and before you try and say I shouldn’t have-- I want to, and you’re not going to tell me contrary hm?”

She was right, Paris was where it had started in a way and he wanted to go back there with her around the time that things had sort of started to begin between them. New Year’s Eve a year ago now. Well, sort of but that was neither here nor there. He wrapped her up in his own arms as she hugged him one arm resting on the small of her back as he held her close. “Awh, you’re getting all sappy” he teased the words said affectionately giving her a small squeeze. “Merry early Christmas love.”

Faye hadn’t been lying when she’d told Ephram that she hoped Wyn only ever remembered Fane, and not the man who’s DNA she carried. That was a huge statement, and while Faye had never pushed her daughter on Fane, she couldn’t help the things she hoped for. Though Fane and Wyn had seemed to have their own plans, the little girl meeting him on her own before Faye was really ready to introduce them. But ever since then, Fane had embraced the fact that Wyn was part of Faye, and had come to care for her too. And the little girl certainly cared for him.

But like her own relationship with Fane, the relationship between him and her daughter was moving at it’s own pace. Nothing rushed, nothing pressured. And that was partly why it worked, Faye thought. Just like their own.

Faye shook her head that no, she was most certainly not going to tell him any of that. She squeezed him harder, thinking back to that night that seemed so long ago now, but had really been barely a year. How life had changed since then.

“‘S your fault,” she sniffed as he commented on her sentimentality. Pulling back, she leaned in and kissed him, much to Eowyn’s giggling delight. She smiled against his mouth, trying to control her own laughter along with all the other things she was feeling. “Let’s get this one to bed huh? So I can thank you properly.”

There was never a day that Fane would consider Faye and Eowyn as anything but a complete package, one that came together and not as a pick and choose option. This was a child who had suffered the loss of someone that was supposed to be important to her, a child that deserved so much better in his opinion. Not that he ever entered this relationship with the thought of replacing her father nor would he claim such a status even if with every day and thing he got to do with the young toddler left him feeling even closer to her than before.

Whatever it was, with any of these relationships Fane felt content in the knowledge that they did work. There was no need to concern himself any more than that. They worked and he was happier than he had been in what felt like a while.

“Mm, of course it is” he breathed a quiet laugh pressing his nose to the side of her head affectionately. The kiss made him hum contently, squeezing her waist as a familiar warmth and contentedness filled him entirely, Wyn’s fairy charm giggles making him laugh against her lips pressing a few quicker kisses to her lips before he drew away. “Alright, c’mon tyke you heard your mum… bedtime hm?”

Teeth brushed, stories read, and her new toy tucked beneath her arm with Bun, Eowyn was soon in the bed and sleeping soundly. Faye closed her door, leaving it cracked as she always did, and then met Fane at the head of the stairs where he was waiting on her. The sketches had been tucked away, along with the card, in her bedside drawer for safekeeping until she could properly frame them. Which she would. Soon. And they would hang on the wall of her bedroom so she could see them whenever she wanted, and be reminded of this night, and later on of their holiday.

The light was dim where she stood with him, though the soft crackle of the fire was still illuminating things below in a soft, warm glow. Faye threaded her fingers with his before rising to kiss him again. It was slower this time, and deeper. Her chest felt like it would burst open right here on the landing, and she wouldn’t care. “I hope you’re not disappointed with your present…” she said between slow kisses. “‘S not near as grand…”

While Faye put Wyn to bed, Fane took the time to go and tidy up a little downstairs, not that there was much to put away but a few bits and pieces here and there. There was also a small laundry load he’d sorted earlier to be put on which he got on with. By the time the clothes were washing he heard Faye finishing up the story for Wyn and made his way for the stairs.

Meeting her on the landing, by the doorway that led on up to the spellroom Fane watched her leave Wyn’s bedroom. His eyes warm behind the glasses that perched on his nose, she looked happy and it was that along with so many other things that made him smile cheerfully. The hall was lit dimly, but Fane could still see her clear as day as she approached taking her hand gently. “Love,” God he’d never get tired of saying that word to her, dipping in to brush his nose against her own being pressed back into the wall slightly by the slow firm press of her lips before she drew back “I love everything you do for me, I could never be disappointed… not by you, never by you.” His eyes drifted around the hallway, recalling that night he came back. That night that everything between them shifted almost in this very spot.

They’d come a long way and a part of him was excited and a little nervous for where it would continue on to.

Faye would never tire of hearing the word either. She had thought perhaps one day it would dim, and be just another word said between them, like it had in her previous relationship. But even now, months since they’d first said it, it still stirred the ever present flame to life in Faye’s chest. That burning ache to hear it everyday for the rest of her life. For longer than that even. Fate willing.

She felt the bump as his back hit the wall, and when she pulled back, her eyes drifted to his. They were so dark here in the hall, like pools of ink, and Faye knew she could get lost in them with little effort. Just like she could lose herself in kissing him, or touching him, or just being close to him. He had the ability to encompass her whole world at times, to be her whole world at times. And while they both had lives outside each other - jobs, responsibilities, and other people they cared about - with every day that passed those lives started to come closer and closer together. Faye would never expect to be first in Fane’s life, that was Dani’s spot. Just as Eowyn was hers. And they knew and understood this. Though this was also slowly starting to slowly collide. Faye wouldn’t rush anything, but she also wouldn’t stop it if that was where their lives were headed.

They had come a long way, and Faye felt much as Fane did: excited and nervous. But a part of what made them work so well is that neither of them would ever be pressed to do anything before they were ready. Before it felt right. And the other would never pressure. They had agreed at the beginning to just… let it happen. And see where life took them.

Earlier in the year, Faye might have come back with the fact that she’d disappointed every person in her life so far. But now, she just hummed quietly. “I jus’ wanna make you happy…” She leaned back in, nosing along his jaw, her hands finding their way beneath his sweater. “I seem to remember you makin’ me very happy… right here in fact,” she grinned against his ear. For how could she forget? “Maybe I should repay the favor, hm?”

Fane was almost certain he would never tire of saying it, it wasn’t often he said it to people. The word meant a lot for the both of them and it was partly why it had taken them both a while to even say it to one another, let alone say it and the other hear it. It had taken almost losing one another for the realisation to dawn that why should they wait? When things could end just as fast as they had flamed into being. He wasn’t willing to chance losing her without her knowing how he felt, and that had ultimately led them here.

Resting against the wall his arms looped around her securely he traced tender patterns on her back through the thin material of her top content entirely to simply be here with her. Not even talking or even doing anything, simply being, existing in the same place was enough to settle any nerves he might’ve had. Not that he ever really felt any when he was with her. This was their first Christmas together, the first of many or so he hoped and he wanted to do everything in his power to make it special for the both of them explaining some of the other things he had planned later on. For now though, it was just them and he was entirely content with how everything was starting to settle and merge into one another.

He might’ve been scared if it was anyone else, if he didn’t trust them as implicitly as he had come to trust Faye with almost everything he had of worth and value and meaning to him. Fane knew in perhaps the deepest part of him that she would never do anything to ever intentionally harm him. That didn’t mean to say there wouldn’t be arguments but it also meant understanding that the things she did came from a place of meaningful good intent.

“You don’t need to make me happy love,” he murmured just for her to hear “I am happy. Happier than I’ve been in… A long time.” He sighed as her hands found their way under his jumper “if memory serves, it was the other side of the door I had you on.” How could he ever forget? She had looked divine then and even now she was just as enrapturing for him. “Depends,” he said with a small grin “when can I get my christmas present? ‘Cause… you’ve got me curious now.”

To be honest, Faye was still a little scared. But it was a good fear. Mostly. The bad fears she didn’t think about. Things like not being able to find a way to stay with him longer, or not end up looking so much older than him. Then the age old fears of something happening to him. Because vampires, for all their strength and longevity, weren’t invulnerable. But right now they were happy, and she wasn’t going to blemish their first Christmas with talk or thoughts of things that might never come to pass.

And just as Fane trusted her, Faye trusted him. With every part of herself, the good and the bad. With her heart, and most importantly, with her daughter’s heart. Things like this were always a risk, but what wasn’t these days? And it wouldn’t always be easy, but what things worth having were?

“Good,” she murmured, her hands creeping  more firmly beneath his shirt and up his back. Her fingers danced over the ridges of his spine and along the dips and curves of the long muscles on either side. “And you’re right… it was.” She tried to nudge him towards said bedroom door, intent on repaying him no matter what, heat rising in her belly, but his question stopped her. She smirked. “You’re a dreadful tease, you know that?” She dipped her fingers into his jeans, tugging at them. “You really want it?” she asked, suddenly a bit nervous.

There was no point in wasting either one of their time for now with talk of what ifs, not when they were both so happy with how things were going and as Fane had already told her. He was happy, immensely so, right here with her. There was no where else he could think of where he was sure he would be just as if not even more content than this very moment or any other moment he got with her and the more important thing was he didn’t want or need her to thank him for it. Her wanting to give him it was something different entirely, but he by no means did any of this just to seek it out.

They had both unloaded their deepest desires and darkest secrets to one another, and they were both still standing. They were both still here and Fane had absolutely no intention of going anywhere. Why would he?

The firm press of her fingers creeping up the ridges and notches of his spine made it hard to focus on anything other than the burning divots she was pressing into his skin. “It was,” he echoed a smile on his lips as she gave him a nudge in the direction she wanted him to go. With a small chuckle he let himself be pushed in that direction if it was where she really wanted. “I’m not a tease, you said I was going to get a Christmas present and… well… You can’t just leave me hanging now can you?” he asked giving her a look that said ‘you know I’m right’. “I’m curious even if it’s hard to think with you trying to get your hands down my pants.”

She opened her mouth to dispute him, but his look had her clamping it shut. She shook her head at him, trying not to smile, even though she still looked nervous. “One of these days, you’re not be able to persuade me so easily, you know that?” Faye, who was for all intents and purposes as stubborn as they came, folded like a house of cards in a hurricane when it came to Fane. She tried, she really did. And sometimes she almost outlasted him, but as of yet he nearly always got what he wanted.

Not that it was ever anything malicious or that made her uncomfortable. Fane knew where the line was and how hard he could push. “I must not be doin’ that good a job if you can think about anythin’ else…” she said, letting her hand drift to stroke him lightly through his jeans. “But…” Faye huffed good-naturedly, and shook her head again. “Fine. Stay here.”

Going downstairs, she crouched down in front of the tree and pulled out the little box that she’d wrapped up a few days ago. A small wave of insecurity set in, wondering if it was too much, or if it might just be silly. She hadn’t thought so when she’d made the decision, but now that she was going to give it to him, well…

What’s the worst that could happen?

Finding him waiting patiently where she’d left him, Faye hesitated only briefly before handing him the little square box. She was clearly nervous, even though she tried not to show it. “Like I said, it’s not.. grand or anythin’, but… I just wanted you to have it. Figured it made sense at this point… but you don’t have to-” She cut herself off, blushing. “I’m gonna shut up now…”

Her nervousness didn’t go amiss, and his hands that were secure tracing little patterns on her back only continued to do exactly that as they stood there, hoping to reassure her that whatever it was she had gotten him he would love. Because he loved anything she thought about getting him, how couldn’t he love anything and everything when it was something she’d put thought and time into gifting? “Yeah, sure one day you’ll be able to deny me like that” he was teasing of course, knowing full well that he could mostly get Faye to do almost anything (within reason of course) he asked. If asked in the right way at least.

Not that he would ever abuse that not that he would ever call it a power or anything else over her. It was simply that they both knew what they thought was best for the other especially if something was affecting them negatively in an emotional capacity. “Not t’discredit you love, but you know my weakness is Christmas ‘n’ you can tea me with the thought of Christmas presents ‘n’ not deliver.” So, when she requested he stay where he was Fane did as he was asked though he did pause to push open the door to her room with his thumb.

He heard her moving about downstairs, and while a part of him, the very curious and disobedient part of him wanted to follow her downstairs to see what she was up to he did as he was asked. Waiting, foot tapping a little unable to help his anticipation of what she might’ve thought to get him that would make her this nervous.

Seeing her reappear up the stairs he gave her a smile, hoping again to settle whatever nerves she had and his eyes drifted to the little box she was carrying. Which was soon enough pressed into his hands, he held it in his fingers reverently. “Hey, it’s from you and ‘cause of that whatever it is I love it already.” He looked back down at the box and then back to her noting how red she’d gone and eventually reached out to take her hand gripping it and giving it a sure squeeze before he pulled her into the bedroom closing the door quietly behind them. “C’mon sit with me whilst I open it hm?” walking over to sit down on the end of the bed he waited until she was sat beside him before he let his fingers slip under the end of the paper lifting the tape and unwrapping the gift until he held the box. Looking at it he had to wonder what it was, and finally he lifted the lid looking at the key that was nestled inside.

“A key?” he asked a little confused, a key to what? But thinking on it a few more moments it dawned on him, her nervousness, the way she tried to downplay its grandeur and a sudden wash of-- Fane didn’t even know if he had a word to put to it but the shock melted away and a few moments later he was sure he remembered that he needed to say… something other than gaping down at it. “To your house? Oh my god--- Faye…” he looked up at her affection and love and so many other things bubbling up in a small laugh moving to pull her into a hug and pressing a soft kiss to her lips a few moments later. “I love you, so much it’s… ridiculous. I love it” he said of the key more sincerely a little time later unable to wipe the smile off his face.

Faye sat down beside him on her bed, pulling her knees up to her chin and wrapping her arms around them. She turned her head to watch him, as much as she wanted to look away, in case he was disappointed. But then there was a moment of confusion, and she felt herself getting ready to try and explain it away again, since it seemed like he wasn’t sure about it. But then his face changed, and he was looking at her.

“Yeah,” she said with a tiny shrug. But he had pulled her into a hug so fast that she couldn’t help but laugh along with him. Her arms wrapped around him in return, squeezing tight before he pulled back and kissed her. His face had lit up, and there were no words for all the things she saw passing across his face. Just as she had no words to describe how seeing him so happy, over something so simple, made her feel.

“I love you too,” she said, completely and utterly overcome by the joy on his face. “Do you really?” she couldn’t help but ask. “It’s not… Paris, but…” Her hand moved up to brush over his face. “It means just as much to me. For you to have it.”

Fane wasn’t sure what he was supposed to say, or even what he was supposed to do in a situation like this. Suffice to say he had never been put or been in a situation like this before explaining why it had taken a little while for what it was she had gifted him and how he was supposed to react clicked. But the joy, the happiness he felt at something so… permanent, a sign that this really was serious and they were both committing themselves entirely to it, he was sure that if he needed to breathe he would have forgotten how to in that very moment.

He was laughing as he kissed her, feeling a sense of pure and unbridled love and joy, all because of her. Squeezing her tight in the hopes of showing just how happy he was Fane pulled her in tight. “You’re amazing, god you’re so incredible.”

“Of course I do!” he exclaimed, another laugh working its way up his throat shaking his head as she said it wasn’t Paris. “Fuck me Faye-- you don’t need to give me Paris, or… anything like that… This…” he gestured wordlessly at the key trying to find any words to convey how much more this was. “This… Is.. It’s way more than Paris… Paris isn’t going anywhere…” he shifted to take her hand intertwining their fingers everything in his features softening and growing serious “no one’s… Ever done anything like this for me… No one’s ever wanted me to stay… Of course I love it Faye, gods this… it means the world to me. I don’t even have the words...” he trailed off looking back down at the little key with a wide-eyed gaze.

He really didn’t have to say anything. Faye had never expected it, nor did she ever make him feel pressured (at least she tried not to) when it came to such things. Sometimes no words were needed. And as he gazed at the little piece of gold metal, something that most people would see as nothing but what it was, a key, Faye knew he felt the weight of it, just as she did.

A key meant home. A key meant he was welcome. A key meant she wanted him to stay. Gods above but she wanted him to stay. Forever. Until all the stars went dark, and the sun died out, and it was just the two of them gazing up at a darkened sky, but content  with it all, because they were together. His joy was palpable. It literally radiated off of him, and Faye couldn’t help but continue to get caught up in it, gripping him tightly as her own love and joy flowed over and she felt her eyes start to sting a bit. But they were happy tears. And as she dashed them away, she was smiling.

She laced her fingers with his, feeling the warmth of his skin from where they had been embracing already. Her expression softened too, the pair of them feeding off each other now, just as they sometimes were opposites in how their emotions swung. She brought his hand to her mouth, kissing it before pressing it to her cheek. “Of course I want you to stay. I want you to stay forever…” Perhaps it was too strong a statement, but it was how she felt. And she couldn’t remember if she’d ever said it aloud before, but in the wake of how he felt about the key, and the emotions it had stirred, Faye figured raw honesty was the only thing worthy.

After a moment of gazing down at the key herself, Faye tipped his head back towards hers with a finger along his jaw. “You don’t have to say anything, love…” This time when she leaned in, she kissed him differently than just a few moments earlier. Slow and easy, and with that touch of reverence that bled through so often between them. “Just… stay? Always?”

A key was something symbolic, it meant more than just you can come over whenever you want without asking. The key was an invitation to make a home, to settle in a place where he was welcome and safe. A place he could come on the days where things got too much and he needed somewhere to rest and regather himself before rising and facing the world again. He’d felt it, but it wasn’t this cottage or the walls of it that made it feel like a place he could call home. It was the fact Faye was here; it was that, wherever Faye was… That was where his home truly was.

Just as she’d told him so many times before now, it wasn’t the money or the influence he possessed. It was the person they were for each other, the things they did for each other that mattered the most and counted in the long run and he prayed that however long they had would be a long one because he wanted as many days and nights with her as he could possibly get.

The warmth of her lips against his knuckles made him smile, squeezing her fingers lightly. “Good, ‘cause you’re stuck with me now” he was joking and he could hear it in his own ears how wet his voice sounded but there was no mistaking how happy he felt. Happy, safe and so unbelievably happy.

Both of them took a moment to look down at the box which Fane eventually closed not wanting to misplace it or anything else just before she used her fingers to tip his head and he gazed at her warmly his fingers curling into her back and pulling her close as his lips pressed to her own tender and simply affectionate and so fitting for this here and now between them. His head tipped forwards, pressing against her own with his eyes closed “always… I’ll always stay for you.” He was lost in the warmth that was threatening to engulf him, the security he felt no where else besides when he was with her. “Can we jus’--” Fane drew in a shallow breath “I just want t’hold ‘n’ be here with you.”

It was this fact that Fane had so easily realized that had made the key so special to Faye. The symbolism of saying ‘you have a home here.’ It was a permanence, that while a bit frightening for them both, just seemed right. They weren’t the kind of people to rush, especially given their personal histories, and if Faye had had any reservations about the key itself, or what it meant, she would never have given it to him.

And home to her was with him. Whether that was here in her cottage, or at his estate, or in Paris, or New Orleans, or anywhere else. Home was wherever he was. And she would follow him to the ends of the earth if needed. Because she wanted as long as possible too. It was why they’d begun to research the blood bonds. It had been a tentative start, and more of a ‘what if’ situation than anything, but they both knew that neither wanted to go on without the other. It wasn’t that they couldn’t go on if something happened, but they simply didn’t want to. Because finding your match, the person that simply... got you, understood you, and cared more deeply about you than any other person in the world, because of who you were and who the two of you were together, only happened once in a lifetime.

And Faye only had one life to live.

“It’s a sacrifice I’m willin’ to bear,” she smiled as they both turned to look at the little key. Something so small, so simple, and yet it held everything they both wished for. Perhaps one day they would live together permanently, but for right now, this was another huge, important step for the both of them, and it was enough. It was more than enough.

The kiss was warm and gentle, and the heat that had been rising in Faye’s belly earlier settled, spreading out through her body and making her feel sleepy and sated as if they had just made love. And perhaps they had, in a way.

She pet his face as he vowed to always stay, and she whispered that she would always stay for him as well. Her eyes stung as she swallowed past the happy tears that threatened to spill over, and she gave a small nod as she said he just wanted to be here and hold her right now. Another lingering kiss was pressed to his mouth, and Faye released him just long enough to pull down the covers of the bed and beckon him close again. “C’mere, baby…”

It was just another reason why he loved her, the fact that they could understand what the other meant by something with a little time to take thinking about it. The permanence that came with this gift-- Fane just felt like his head was spinning and he felt almost giddy with the excitement at what this might mean for them both going forwards and a part of him wondered if he should’ve thought to give her something of the same. But Fane had told her that he wanted to take her travelling, to take her to see the world and everything it had to offer and it was part of the reason why he’d organised the trip they were going to go away on. He was in for the long-haul, he’d already made that clear for Faye, he didn’t half-arse things like this and he wasn’t about to start now. He wanted to be someone she could depend on, and count on to be there for her whenever she needed it.

Always and forever.

“Even the Star Wars jokes and terrible puns?” he asked with a little smile, shuffling closer to her until their arms were touching on the bed. This was a big step, and the future would likely hold even more but for now Fane was overly content with this. The next stepping stone in a long set of them to wherever that end point might just so happen to be.

As much as he always wanted her, tonight Fane just wanted to cherish this. To not be overcome by desire but simply to settle and enjoy being with her. His fingers held her close as they ended up sitting there for a little while breathing quietly after their small moment of intimacy peace settling over them both. He let Faye move enough to pull down the covers, enough to let her get under before he crawled up the bed after her and settled down into the spot he always ended up taking on the mattress before he shifted close arms naturally sliding around her and legs tangling until he held her to his chest his mouth and nose pressed against the crown of her head. His eyes closed and he gently stroked his fingers up and down her spine in slow soothing patterns. “I love you so much.”

“‘Specially the Star Wars jokes and bad puns,” she smiled, stroking her fingers along his arm. Faye knew Fane wasn’t used to being someone’s first choice. Not in the long run anyway. So she understood, as much as she could, what it meant for her to say ‘I want you to stay.’ Because Faye too had always been left behind. Always been last. Always been the one least considered in nearly every relationship she’d ever had. Until recently of course. So she knew what ‘you are my only choice’ meant. Other than their children, of course. But that went without saying.

Faye was more than happy - ecstatic even - over the trip they were going to take. Because not only did Paris have significance for them, but it was another step forwards. Day trips and going away for the weekend were one thing, and Faye loved them just as much. But a weeklong holiday in Paris? At Christmas? That was something else entirely.

She was utterly content as well, especially as her gift had made him so happy. Because that’s all she wanted, was for him to be happy. For all of them to be happy really. And to move towards whatever the future might hold. Faye lay down close and lay her head against his chest as he pulled her in, used to the coolness that slowly turned to warmth as he soaked up her body heat. He was only warmer when he had fed. As she did from time to time, she idly wondered how warm he would have been as a mortal. Probably a literal furnace, if the way he warmed even now was any indicator.

They wrapped around each other, limbs entangling as they found their usual position. Faye breathed him in, hands sliding beneath his jumper to find warming skin. She hummed in contentment as the endearment slipped from his lips again, and she pressed her own to his chest. “I love you too.” She smiled, closing her own eyes as her fingers traced gentle lines over the scars on his hip.

[mrswhozeewhatsis]

Every Breath She Takes

A/N: This is my second follow celebration personalized fic! This one is for yet another immensely patient follower, @plaidstiel-wormstache who put up with me peppering her with questions about all manner of weird things (most of which didn’t even end up in here). Special thanks to @littlegreenplasticsoldier who beta read this monster and helped me get the accent a little closer to reality. Honorable mention to @faith-in-dean who helped me title it! These are all quality women with quality blogs and you should be following them!

Summary: Sam and Dean meet Jessie, and the rest is history.

Prompt: Whatever moved me, preferably fluff.

Pairing: Sam x Jessie 

Warnings: None. It’s so fucking fluffy you could pet it.

Word count: 2382 (Believe me, you don’t want it longer. The story took a very weird turn around 2500 words, and I decided it was better to end it fluffy.)

Sam was impressed by Jessie from the first moment he saw her. Admittedly, when he first saw her, he was actually seeing a Leviathan impersonating her, but when the monster was as dead as Levis got, she was still impressive. He had almost a foot in height over her, but she was a whirlwind of furious anger with long, dark hair and an explosive expression. She got up off the floor where she’d been thrown, stormed over to the impersonator’s head, and kicked it across the warehouse like a champion soccer player.

“That’s what y’get fer messin’ with the big boys, y’slimey bastard!” she screamed as the head hit a wall with a wet thump and rolled around a corner. She looked up at Sam triumphantly while her chest heaved and her hands landed on her hips. “So, big boy, are there more of those things around here that need killin’ or is this the part where I take you out to dinner to thank you for savin’ me life?”

Sam’s mouth flapped silently while his brain tried to catch up. Her accent enthralled him while he fought to look away from her eyes as they sparkled with mischief. “You’re not going to ask me what that was or what’s going on?”

Jessie shrugged and gave him a lopsided smile. “Mate, I’m from Australia. It’s not a proper Monday morning ‘til ya’ve killed five things that wanna kill ya back!”

The smile that shone from her face was the first thing to warm Sam’s heart since Bobby had died, and he immediately hoped he would see more of it. In spite of everything that was going on around him, for the first time in a very long time, Sam laughed, and his fate was sealed.

When Dean came around the corner, head in hand like Perseus and Medusa, he all but dragged Sam back to the Impala. Jessie followed right behind. The car was three miles down the road before Dean fully realized she was in the back seat and looked at Sam with raised eyebrows and gritted teeth. Sam just shrugged, a wide-eyed innocent smile covering that he was secretly glad that she was there. Dean tried to drop her somewhere, anywhere, trying to convince her that she could still have a normal life, but she wouldn’t go.

“Maybe you didn’t notice in the rush to leave, Pretty Boy, but that head you stashed in your trunk was mine. Now, I’m assuming you had a reason for leaving the body behind, but even if you didn’t, it’s still there, telling the world that I’m dead. You drop me off anywhere, and people are gonna have questions, am I right?”

Dean glared at her for a long moment, then hit the steering wheel as he let out a curse. Slamming the car into gear, he tore out of the grocery store parking lot, tires squealing. No matter what, she wasn’t going back, and it took all of Sam’s willpower not to smile.

Jessie took to hunting faster than anyone Sam had ever seen. She was a quick learner, especially when Dean taught her. The two seemed to get along like oil and water, constantly bickering and trying to one-up each other, but Sam saw the true affection that lay beneath it all. Dean was secretly proud of how easily Jessie passed every test, even if it was only to show him up, and Jessie loved surprising Dean every time she exceeded his expectations. Sam loved watching her rub it in Dean’s face, since it usually included a strange, but enthusiastic, dance which took his breath away and made him grin so hard his cheeks ached. When it came to hitting the books, she was no slouch there, either. She always seemed to know exactly where to go to get the information they needed and was just as quick as either of the brothers to make connections and find answers.

When they found the bunker, Jessie was even more excited about the library than Sam was. Specifically, she was excited to read all the journals she found there. She’d pored over John’s journal, and the journals Sam and Dean had taken from the Campbell compound, eager to read firsthand accounts of hunts and how other hunters dealt with the life. She was fascinated with how the Men of Letters documented everything with pictures and video, not just writing, and soon was taking millions of photos on every hunt. Dean would growl at getting held up while Jesse snapped pictures of Wendigo scat (“I’m not taking pictures of poop, Dean!”) or monster footprints (“I know we were thinking werewolf, but are we sure Bigfoot isn’t real?”) or whatever she felt was unique to a case (“The book says how you do the ritual is just as important as the spell ingredients and the words, so yes, Dean, I’m recording you. Now, make pretty for the camera, sweet cheeks!”).

Through it all, Sam watched her. Quietly, he encouraged her, grinning at her antics and laughing at her quips. When she was injured, he handled her gently while he patched her up. When a hunt went badly, he let her bury herself in his arms until her tears finally dried. When a hunt was finished quickly and easily, he made sure there were glasses of water mixed in with her tumblers of whiskey and ridiculously colored cocktails with little umbrellas.

He watched her as she challenged Dean to bet after bet, getting Dean to offer the serious stakes like letting her pick the music on hunts or cleaning up the library after rough research sessions. She lost as often as she won, but it was all worth it for the times when she was victorious, singing country songs at the top of her lungs while Dean glowered and revved the engine. He watched her as she danced in the kitchen to Justin Timberlake, her hips shaking as she unloaded grocery bags and put things away. He watched her as she slept on scratchy comforters in cheap motel rooms, her hair splayed out on pillows he definitely wouldn’t steal for himself the following night (but he totally did). Every day, he watched her embrace everything she came across, almost fearlessly, and with a passion he hadn’t felt in a long time. He watched her, careful to not let her see him watching, for fear she’d stop being entirely herself if she knew he saw her.

Eventually, the day he feared finally came, and he watched her as she danced with some douchey-looking guy at a bar after a hunt. He was in a suit, with slicked-back hair and an expensive watch. He flaunted his gold card when he ordered her a drink and winked at her as he spoke to the bartender. As they danced to some pop rock ballad that made Dean groan, his hand dipped to just below the small of her back, not quite being so rude as to actually grab her ass, but definitely enjoying the feel of the slope down toward it. Sam watched her giggle and blush while he tried to drown the sick feeling in his stomach.

“If you stare at her any harder, you’re going to burn a hole through her dress and then the dick will really get a show,” Dean said as he sat down across from Sam. “You better make your move quick, Sam, or we’re not gonna see her again until after breakfast.”

Sam glared at his brother, wishing he could burn a hole through Dean’s smirk. “If she liked me that way, she’d have said something or done something, Dean. I’m not what she wants.”

Dean shook his head. “You know, for a guy who got a full ride to fucking Stanford, you sure are dumb sometimes,” he said with a jab at Sam before finishing his drink and turning to inspect a raucous group of ladies at the bar.

Sam downed the rest of his drink and shook his head. “All right, present your case. What makes you think I have a snowball’s chance in hell?”

Dean glanced at Sam and chuckled, then began counting off reasons on his fingers. “When she’s hurt or upset, she always goes to you. When she’s happy or excited, she always goes to you. When she has to be the deciding vote, she always votes with you. Every time we stop for food, she always gets something for you.” Dean looked at his brother and shook his head at Sam’s unconvinced expression. “And even if it weren’t for all of that, it’s the way she looks at you, man. She’s always watching you, especially when you’re doing that thing that makes the female victims talk. Dude, she hates when you do that thing.”

Sam considered his brother’s words but wasn’t brave enough to give himself that kind of hope. “I don’t know, Dean.” He shook his head and stared into his empty glass.

Dean tapped the table with his hand and stood up to leave. “Fine. Don’t believe me. Watch her go home with that asshat and spend the night alone torturing yourself thinking about what they’re doing. But I guarantee, if you go over there right now and step in, she’ll forget him so fast his head will spin.”

Sam’s view of Jessie was obscured by Dean’s departure, and when he looked back where she and the dick had been, he saw nothing but empty floor.

His eyes bounced over the bar, the dart board, the jukebox, and every table in the joint, but she was nowhere. His heart raced as he searched the tiny dive bar a second and then a third time, but he still didn’t find her. Despair filled him as he realized he was already too late. She was already gone.

He rubbed a hand over his face and slumped back in the booth, fighting the urge to throw his empty glass against the wall just for the satisfaction of hearing it shatter. His head ached with the emotion he wasn’t letting out, his eyes burning as he clenched his fists so tightly his palms stung. He’d waited too long to tell her how he felt, and now she was off doing….

Sam’s head dropped into his hands and he pushed the heels of his palms into his eyeballs as if to physically wipe away the thoughts of what Jessie was doing with Douchey McDoucherton. When the worst of the images had passed, he dropped his hands and stared at his empty glass again, trying to will it to fill automatically. He no longer had the energy or the strength to hail the waitress and ask for another refill, no matter how much he needed it, so he would just sit here and stare at the glass until someone kicked him out.

He was deep into a pit of self-loathing and self-recrimination when his empty glass was pushed aside by a large glass of water.

“You look like you need this,” said the most beautiful voice with the most melodic accent Sam had ever heard.

Sam looked up, and there stood Jessie. Her brow was furrowed as she looked him over, but he thought she’d never looked more beautiful. “I thought you’d left with that guy,” Sam said quietly, the shock bleeding into his voice.

“Brad?” she scoffed as she slid into the booth next to him. “He must have had pizza with garlic, onion, and anchovies for lunch or something. His breath was truly foul. I mean, it was worse than Marmite breath, and that’s worse than Vegemite breath! And I didn’t think that was possible! There’s not a lot of—“

Sam interrupted Jessie’s train of thought by pulling her into his arms and slamming his lips onto hers. There was a moment of panic when she didn’t respond, but then her arms wound around him and she started kissing back.

The kiss was about the most perfect kiss Sam had ever had. Jessie tasted so sweet, like the fruity concoction she’d been drinking, and it almost made Sam dizzy. He groaned when he finally had to come up for air, not wanting to separate from her now that he had her. As they both pulled back, Sam kept his eyes closed, fearing what he might see on Jessie’s face.

“Well, you certainly don’t have Vegemite breath,” Jessie said, her voice breathy and soft.

Sam’s eyes flew open to gauge her reaction and his heart nearly burst out of his chest at her smile. Her grin matched his, and his was so wide his cheeks ached with it. He set his forehead on hers and sighed. “I thought I missed my chance. I thought you were gone and I was too late.”

Jessie pulled back a bit, and Sam opened his eyes to see her smiling face again.

“Too late for what, Sam?” she asked quietly, her eyes wide as she searched his face and took a shuddering breath.

“Too late to tell you how much you mean to me. Too late to kiss you and hold you, and—” Sam cupped the side of her head with one hand, tangling his fingers in her hair and sighing at the feel of her. “Too late to ask you if maybe you might feel the same way, too?” Sam’s eyes were hopeful as Jessie continued to grin.

“Yeah, Sam. Yeah, I do,” she said, her eyes sparkling as she reached up and combed her fingers through Sam’s hair, too, caressing his cheek until he leaned into her touch and closed his eyes with a sigh.

Sam kissed her again, this time more slowly, with less panic. He took the time to really taste her, to feel her softness beneath his hands. He listened to the breathy sighs and whimpers she let out as her lips moved against his. As they came up for air, he filled his nose with the scent of her shampoo before opening his eyes and drinking in the sight of her. Her cheeks were rosy, her eyes bright, her mouth slightly swollen, and it was all from his kisses. Finally, she was his, to experience with all of his senses, but he’d never get tired of watching her. 

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