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minijenn · 6 years ago

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Universe Falls Chapter 63

Goddamn its been way too fuckin long aklsdjlasdjkad blame stupid ass Kingdom Hearts ANYWAY UF is back with a new chapter and its a pretty fun one I suppose. I kinda started rushing it about halfway through cause I wanna get it done and get onto the next one (aka fuckin emotional as hell fusion chapter) but ya know, things happens so here we are. And with that outta the way, I’ll leave ya to it. Enjoy!

Chapter 63: Bot Battle

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“Ahem,” Peridot loudly cleared her throat, garnishing the attention of the group gathered before her. After leaving the Kindergarten, the green Gem had made sure that Garnet, Pearl, and Ford, the only three who were uninformed about the Cluster after their latest misadventure, were all congregated together in the temple, Amethyst and the kids along with them to help in her explanation if need be. “As it seems I have no other options, I have conceded to reveal some important information to you about the Cluster.”

The Gems and the author said nothing to this, instead simply exchanging a dubious glance as they wondered whether or not Peridot had any intention of actually telling them the truth or not. Amethyst assured them that she was, however, by offering them a small nod, her expression gravely serious, even if the green Gem’s method of demonstrating exactly what the Cluster was to them was… less than serious.

With a snap of Peridot’s fingers, Steven shuffled forward, his entire body covered by a large cardboard box with a crudely-drawn Earth upon it. Dipper and Mabel walked alongside the young Gem largely to guide him along, since his vision was obscured by the box entirely.

“Behold!” Mabel exclaimed with a dramatic flourish, tossing a handful of glitter over the box as an added touch. “The Earth!”

“Hey!” Peridot snapped, glaring at the girl. “I was supposed to say that! Now… Behold, the Earth!” she began again, slapping the box with the flyswatter she was using as a baton and causing Steven to stumble back a bit as a result. “At the very center of this planet lies… the Cluster! Rotate,” she ordered, and with a little help from Dipper, Steven managed to turn himself and the box around to show another drawing, this time of the Cluster buried far beneath the Earth’s surface. “This is the Cluster. It’s a massive, artificial fusion composed of millions of Gem shards. It has laid dormant for thousands of years within this planet’s crust. When this Gem activates and takes its form, the result will be catastrophic. Now!”

Peridot hit the box once more, cuing Steven to begin shaking the box to build up suspense. Garnet, Pearl, and Ford all leaned forward in quiet dread, all three of them quite alarmed by what they’d already just heard about this Cluster. However, their worst fears were confirmed, albeit in a bit of an overexaggerated way when a rather silly, snake-like sock puppet burst through the drawing of the Earth on the box abruptly.

“BWAAAAA!” Steven growled loudly, thrashing the sock puppet around in faux violence, much to Peridot’s annoyance.

“What is that?” she asked with a scoff.

“It’s the Cluster!” Steven said through the puppet.

“I made it myself!” Mabel chimed in brightly. “I’ve been a bit of a sock puppet expert ever since I tried putting together this whole musical with them a few weeks back. It didn’t really turn out being exactly like I hoped it would, but… at least I was still able to make a good Cluster puppet with what I had left! Do you like it?”

“No!” Peridot huffed, swatting the puppet and Steven’s hand away. “The won’t look anything like that! B-but it is real,” she turned back towards the others. “And it can activate at any moment, destroying this planet and everything on it in the process! Including all of us!”

“And there was probably a much easier way to explain all of that that didn’t involve using a box and a sock puppet,” Dipper remarked somewhat dryly, sending the green Gem a critical glance.

“They’re called visual aids,” Peridot countered coldly. “And yes, they were necessary in getting the point of the Cluster across to these clods! They certainly never would have understood it without them, I can assure you.”

“Believe me,” Garnet spoke up, her tone and expression both grim after everything they’d just learned. “We would have.”

“What a Cluster, huh?” Amethyst asked, somewhat sarcastically, though there was still a hint of dread in her tone.

“And I thought Bill’s intentions for the Earth were bad…” Ford muttered to himself, his eyes wide with concern. “But this is arguably even worse. Who could have ever guessed that Homeworld could be so�� vindictive over losing this planet all those years ago?”

“We should have…” Pearl whispered so quietly that none of the others heard her as her hands quickly slipped up to cover her mouth.

“This abomination must be stopped,” Garnet said, standing with firm resolve. “Before its too late.”

“B-but how?” Pearl asked, regathering her bearings. “We’d need to build some sort of machine to take us to the center of the Earth! It’ll have to-”

“Hey!” Peridot snapped impatiently, lashing her flyswatter out at the white Gem. “I wasn’t finished speaking yet! What we need is to build some sort of machine to take us to the center of the Earth.”

“Um, that’s literally what Pearl just said,” Dipper pointed out, crossing his arms.

“Furthermore,” Peridot continued, staunchly ignoring both him and the pointed glare Pearl was sending her way. “It’ll need to withstand up to 360 gigapascals of pressure and temperatures up to 9800 degrees.”

“And,” Ford cut in, adding his vast knowledge onto the discussion. “It’ll likely need to be outfitted with an advanced hyperflux engine in order to-”

“In order to cut through the Earth’s crust and get us down to the Cluster in a reasonable amount of time, yes of course,” Peridot rolled her eyes. “Anybody who has any inkling of intelligence at all would know that. Which is why I’m surprised that such a primitive creature like you would be able to figure it out.”

“Oh, I’ll show her ‘primitive’…” Ford growled, rolling up his coat sleeves a bit to give the green Gem a piece of his mind. At least until Pearl put up an arm to stop him just in time.

“Well, we mustn’t waste any time,” the white Gem concluded. “We need to start finding parts for this machine immediately.”

“Yes, obviously,” Peridot huffed, still irritated. “You all certainly do have a knack for stating what’s very plain to see, don’t you? Either way, we can start by dismantling all devices inside of this dwelling.”

Before anyone could object, Peridot hurried over to the kitchen, jumping up onto the counter and grabbing the microwave so she could pry it off of the cabinet it was connected to. “This simplistic radiation concentrator should come in handy!” she exclaimed, yanking it down with a heavy shout before it ultimately fell past her and onto the floor, breaking instantly.

“Whoa, wait!” Steven exclaimed, shaking the box off of him as he watched the green Gem with newfound alarm as she grabbed the phone lying on the nearby coffee table.

“This baseline vibration transmitter could possibly serve a function!” she cried before smashing the phone itself down onto the table to open it up and reveal its inner components. From there, she ran up to the loft, hoisting up Steven’s television, despite how heavy it was for her. “T-there’s a remote chance something useful could be inside this primitive image cube!”

Everyone down below flinched as the TV came crashing down to the ground, though fortunately, Steven was quick to finally put an end to Peridot’s frenzy before she could go on to break any more of his possessions. “Wait!” he exclaimed before evening things out. “I have a better idea that doesn’t involve destroying the house!”

While most of the others were still largely wrapped up in their concern over the Cluster, Amethyst couldn’t help but crack a smile over this, knowing that even when the rest of them were at a loss over what to do, the young Gem usually wasn’t. “Classic Steven.”

The so-called “Universe Family Barn” had been largely untouched ever since the last ill-fated engineering project took place there. Despite the fact that Pearl’s space ship had been an abject failure, fortunately, there was still a large abundance of leftover junk and scrap materials to be found within its spacious wooden haul. Which was why, upon Steven’s suggestion, the others were all quick to agree that it would be the best place to build their planned drill, hoping that with the space and materials allotted to them, they’d be able to construct what they needed to in whatever amount of time they had left. Which, for all any of them knew, might not be very much time at all.

��Hm… well its no Helusian-9 hyperdronics scrap yard,” Ford remarked as he looked over what they had to work with alongside the kids. “But I suppose it’ll have to do. After all, I’ve made do with much less than this before.”

“It should be adequate enough for us to get started, at least,” Pearl noted thoughtfully. “First, I recommend we organize the component types available to us.”

“And while you’re working on that, I can assemble a rough schematic based on what we have!” Ford finished, adjusting his glasses.

“Wow, it seems like you guys already have this whole drill thing fully figured out,” Dipper said, thoroughly impressed by their smooth organization.

“Well, my boy, I’ve always found it wise to plan ahead, especially when dealing with a massive mutant geoweapon,” the author concluded with a knowing grin.

“Oh, I completely agree, Stanford!” Pearl exclaimed, clasping her hands together. “You know, in a way, this will be a bit nostalgic considering our days working together on that portal way back when.”

“Yes, but unlike that disaster,” Ford frowned, though he quickly perked up upon realizing he was righting a wrong with this project. “This is going to save the Earth rather than nearly destroy it.”

“It certainly is a much more noble cause, I’ll say that much,” Pearl chuckled warmly. Her smile quickly fell, however, upon noticing the rather cutesy, simplistic drawing of the drill that Steven and Mabel had collaborated on on the chalkboard just outside of the barn. “Um... sorry, kids, it’s a lovely drawing, but it won’t look much like this at all…”

“Aw…” Mabel pouted as Steven stopped spinning around on his stool, frowning. “And I thought we hit the nail on the head with it too!”

“Hm…” Peridot finally spoke up, her ongoing silent musing coming to an end as she nodded complacently. “Good. Yes, this is adequate. Thank you, you can go now,” she said to Pearl in particular.

“Uh… what?” Pearl raised an eyebrow, exchanging a confused glance with Ford.

“Hm?” the green Gem paused, confused herself until she clapped lightly, waving the white Gem off. “Um, that will be all?” Pearl let out a small, incredulous scoff at this, realizing exactly what Peridot was playing at with her dismissive attitude, and deciding she was going to have none of it. Still, Peridot persisted as she leaned over to Steven and whispered to him rather obviously. “How do I get her to leave?”

“Excuse me, I’m not leaving,” Pearl said, her hands on her hips as she looked down to the green Gem critically.

“Ugh… very well then,” Peridot rolled her eyes. “I suppose you can stand here and hand me supplies as I call for them, even if that’s not what you’re supposed to do… Same goes for you, you… oddly appendaged human,” she said to Ford, barely sparing him a second glance.

“Pardon me?” Ford remarked somewhat harshly, crossing his arms as he scowled down at the green Gem. “Neither of us are simply going to stand around passively while you do all the work on the drill, Peridot. If we want to get this project done right, then we all need to-”

“Oh, no, I have it covered,” Peridot assured succinctly. “After all, I don’t want a Pearl and some basic human getting in my way. Really, you’d both only slow me down.”

Needless to say that both Pearl and Ford were quite offended by the green Gem’s haughty remarks, yet before they could say anything to challenge them, Steven interjected instead. “Peridot, that’s not fair,” the young Gem shook his head earnestly. “Pearl and Mr. Ford are two of the smartest people I know! They just gotta help us build this drill thingy; they’ll do a great job on it, I’m sure!”

Peridot only let out a small, snide snicker at this, not taking Steven seriously whatsoever. “No, no, you must be confused. A Pearl can’t build a thing like this. And a human certainly couldn’t.”

“And why is that?” Dipper asked rather caustically, starting to take offense to what the green Gem was saying himself as Steven and Mabel were too.

“Well, isn’t it obvious?” Peridot asked plainly. “You humans are simple. Your society and your very understanding of the physical properties of the world around you is lightyears behind, at best. And don’t even get me started on your painfully primitive technology. If your engineering skills can’t even match up to the most basic of Homeworld’s tech,” she said, turning back to Ford and offering him a smug, satisfied grin. “Then how in the stars could you possibly expect to design and construct a machine this advanced and complex?”

“Oh, I have a feeling you’d be very surprised by what I know when it comes to engineering…” Ford muttered quite angrily, knowing he had much to draw on thanks to his 30-year stint traveling the many diverse, often futuristic landscapes of the multiverse. “In fact, I’d almost be willing to wager that I have even more knowledge on that front than you do.”

“Ha! Don’t make me laugh,” Peridot chuckled coldly. “As if your weak organic mind could even compare to the lowliest of Gems! Speaking of lowly Gems…” Her teasing smile only widened as she turned to Pearl, who was already quite incensed herself. “You should know better than anyone that you Pearls aren’t even for this sort of thing! You’re for standing around, and looking nice, and holding stuff for higher ranking Gems! Right?”

“Ugh! That’s enough!” Pearl snapped fiercely, refusing to hear any more, even though she knew it was true. By Homeworld’s standards, at least. “If we’re going to work together, Peridot, then you’re going to have to listen to us. Both of us.”

“Listen… to you?!” At this, Peridot broke down into another heavy gale of laughter, one that only served to irritate Pearl and Ford even more. “Did you teach her to talk like this?” Peridot asked Steven with an incredulous smirk. “Because that’s just rich!”

“Uh… what are you talking about?” the young Gem asked, still not following.

“Uh, duh,” the green Gem said, as though it was obvious. “She’s a Pearl. She’s a made-to-order servant, just like the hundreds of other Pearls being flaunted around back on Homeworld!”

“Wait…” Steven mused, his eyes wide as Mabel let out an awed gasp beside him. “There are… hundreds of Pearls?!”

“W-well, yes,” Pearl admitted with an embarrassed blush. “But-”

“And she looks like she’s a fancy one too…” Peridot remarked, examining Pearl’s sash before the white Gem snatched it away from her with an appalled gasp.

“Hundreds of Pearls…” Steven repeated, still dumbfounded by such a fact.

“I wanna meet every single last one of them!” Mabel quipped, jumping up and down excitedly. “Especially if they’re anywhere near as cool as our Pearl!”

Despite her ongoing mortification, Pearl couldn’t help but let out a small chuckle at this, touched by the sentiment despite the green Gem’s cynicism. “Well…”

“So,” Peridot interupted once more, looking over the white Gem expectantly. “Who do you belong to anyway?”

“NOBODY!” Pearl shouted harshly, refusing to allow herself to ever return to the simplistic, servantile mindset she was created with again.

“Then… what are you for?” the green Gem asked, baffled. Pearl gave her no response, instead swiftly turning away in the hopes that it would curtain this uncomfortable conversation, but of course, it didn’t. “Well… you can belong to me for now,” Peridot concluded. “And so can the human,” she nodded over at Ford, who was rather shocked by the implication. “After all, I’ve always wanted a pet of my own. Ha! A Peridot with a Pearl and a pet human! What would they say back home?”

“Oh, absolutely not!” Ford exclaimed hotly, his hands clenched into tight fists. “I am nobody’s pet! Especially not yours, you… you egotistical, impudent little brat!”

“Yeah, that’s right!” Pearl spoke up before Peridot could even try to get a word in edgewise. “Listen here, you tiny twerp! In case you’ve forgotten, you’re on our turf now! And I didn’t fight a thousand-year war for this planet’s independence to take orders from the likes if you!”

“Excuse me?!” Peridot gasped, appalled by their brashness. “I’m a natural technician, and a certified Kindergartener.”

“Well she sure does act like one…” Dipper remarked to Mabel with a small, amused grin as his sister chuckled to herself.

“I was made for this!” the green Gem continued insistently. “You were made to wallow around in the dirt your planet is made of,” she said, shooting a hard glare up at Ford. “And you were made to take orders, not give them!” she finished, snapping at Pearl relentlessly. “Which is why you’re both going to stop your incessant, rebellious behavior and listen to the Gem in charge here, at once!”

“Oh really?” Pearl countered as both her and Ford leaned in forward towards Peridot amidst the palpable growing tension. “We’ll just see about that…”

“Whoa, whoa! Hang on, guys!” Steven cut in, jumping in between the pair and the green Gem before any sort of violence could break out. “Now, we can all agree that all three of you are good at building things, so… why can’t you try listening to each other?”

“NO!” Pearl, Ford, and Peridot all exclaimed in staunch, harsh unison, each of them refusing to reconcile over their incredibly vast differences.

“Ford and I are just as good at building things as you!” Pearl hissed down at the green Gem angrily. “Better even!”

“Together, we could easily prove everything you said about us completely wrong,” Ford added just as intently.

“Ha!” Peridot scoffed, still not taking either of them seriously, despite their adamance. “Name one thing you two can engineer better than I can. Go on!”

“Advanced lighter-than-air spacecraft!” Pearl asserted boldly.

“Trans-universal, interdimensional portals!” Ford added with just as much passion.

“Robots.”

“Huh?” the trio all turned to Steven as he let out a softly whispered suggestion.

“You should build robots,” the young Gem continued, stars in his wide eyes as he stepped forward, an excited smile growing on his face. “Giant robots! I see a race. A giant robo-race! With prizes! Giant robo-prizes!”

“Oh! Oh! And cheerleaders! Giant robo-cheerleaders!” Mabel added enthusiastically.

“Uh, that might be going a bit too far, Mabel,” Dipper pointed out, though even he wasn’t able to avoid the building excitement for too long. “Still, a huge robot battle sounds like it’d be so cool!”

“You mean like a competition?” Pearl frowned, confused.

“Yeah!” Steven nodded. “To see who’s better at building things. It could be you and Mr. Ford vs. Peridot in the ‘Robot Rumble of the Ages!’ I came up with the name myself!”

“What are these ‘robots’ you speak of?” Peridot asked, not following.

“Oh, they’re sorta like those cute lil’ marble guys you were sending here,” Mabel grinned. “Only these are gonna be way bigger! With lasers! And huge grabby hands!” To prove her point, she playfully imitated a robot, making fake beeping noises as she waved her arms around Peridot until the green Gem waved her away in annoyance.

“Ha! Give me an actual challenge here,” Peridot remarked haughtily. “Building one of these ‘robots’ will be easy!”

“W-well, we can build one faster!” Pearl proclaimed with daring zeal.

“I’d like to see you try!” the green Gem shot back, not wasting anymore time in rummaging through the parts the barn had to offer. Pearl was just about to leap in and do the same, yet before she could, Ford unexpectedly stopped her.

“Pearl, wait,” the author began evenly. “As much as I really hate to admit it… Peridot could be right after all. Even our shared mechanical knowledge might not be enough to counter the experience she’s had with all that advanced Homeworld technology… It pains me to say this, but… I think we might just be out of our league here…”

“Oh, what?” Pearl scoffed, rolling her eyes. “Come on, Stanford, don’t tell me you, of all people, is admitting defeat to a cocky little… for lack of a better word, clod, like her?”

“Oh, believe me, Pearl, I’m as far as humanly possibly from admitting defeat,” Ford smirked, his hands behind his back. “But I do think we’d do well with a little extra help on our side. And fortunately for us, I just so happen to know someone with a rare and brilliant knack for robotics in particular.”

“Um… and who might that-” Pearl gasped, her eyes widening with alarm as she realized exactly who the author was thinking of. “Oh, Stanford, please don’t tell me you’re talking about-”

“That’s right,” Ford nodded, his smile finally fading into slight apprehension as he briefly thought back on the past. “We need Fiddleford. H-he… wouldn’t happen to still be living here in Gravity Falls after all these years… would he?”

“Uh… I guess you could say that…” Mabel spoke up with a small frown.

“Um… Mr. Ford?” Steven said with a sympathetic frown. “Mr. McGucket, well… he’s…”

“He’s… not exactly like you remember him anymore…” Pearl said softly, looking down with remorse. “Let’s just say that…”

“B-but… he’s still… around, isn’t he?” Ford asked, growing steadily more concerned with the unknown fate of his old friend.

“Yeah, he is,” Dipper nodded. “But… its been a few weeks since we’ve seen him. I wonder what he’s been up to since that whole Blind Eye thing…”

“Blind Eye?!” Ford exclaimed, aptly alarmed. “Those robe-wearing freaks are still around?! They only just started popping up around here right after our portal went wrong, what could they-”

“They were still around,” Pearl interjected, crossing her arms. “Until we took care of them once and for all.”

“W-well then… what of Fiddleford?” the author pressed anxiously. “Is he alright? Where can we find him?”

Pearl and the kids exchanged something of a worried glance, knowing that Ford would certainly revile the truth once he learned it. Not that they intended to keep it from him anyway, since his desire to reunite with his old partner seemed to run deeper than just wanting another hand in helping them beat Peridot at her own game.

Which was why Pearl stepped forward, carrying plenty of regret of her own as she decided to take the author to exactly who he wanted to see, no matter what might happen as a result. “You’re not going to like this, but…”

“I-I… I can’t believe it…” Ford shook his head, the shame in his tone unmistakable as they all stood before the entrance to Gravity Falls’ dump. Pearl and the kids had spent the entire trip there explaining McGucket’s rather disheartening story to the author, who could only really react to it with shock and guilt that he was far too ashamed to hide. “I… I knew that Fiddleford had taken his… horrific experience with the portal harshly, but I could have never imagined he would have used that infernal memory gun to…” Ford trailed off, letting out a sad sigh as he shook his head and looked back to the ramshackle shack Pearl and the kids had told him McGucket now called home. “If what you all have told me really is true… then this is all my fault…”

“Oh, Stanford…” Pearl frowned, placing a sympathetic hand on his shoulder. “This isn’t your fault. There’s no way you could have known; there’s no way any of us could have known… Because believe me, if Rose and Garnet and Amethyst and myself had known, then we certainly would have done everything in our power to help him…”

The most Ford could offer in response to such a solemn sentiment was a small, but weary smile. However, upon noticing the palpable remorse between the pair, Steven was quick to step in to try and alleviate it. “Maybe you guys weren’t able to help Mr. McGucket back then…” he began with a frown that soon turned into a reassuring smile. “But the good news is you can still help him now! Heck, we already have by helping him get back his memories!”

“Yeah!” Mabel chimed in enthusiastically. “Which is why I’m sure he’ll totally down to help you guys out with building your super-cool giant robot!”

“Wait, that’s why you clods dragged us all the way out here to this disastrous waste depository?” Peridot asked, baffled as she finally tuned into the conversation. Since the green Gem still needed to be watched carefully lest she run off on her own again, Ford and Pearl agreed that they had to bring her along with them to the junkyard so they could keep an eye on her. Of course, the green Gem had protested, especially when they more or less forced a leash on her to keep her from escaping. Still, she ultimately had no choice in coming along, and was clearly appalled upon learning exactly what the point of this outing really was. “I can’t believe you’re wasting my valuable time that I could be using to build my machine that will no doubt pummel yours into the ground just so you can find this ‘McGucket’ creature! This is completely asinine!”

“Well, its not any more ‘asinine’ than you thinking you can actually take Pearl and Great Uncle Ford on in an inventing battle and win,” Dipper remarked with a rather sarcastic smirk that succeeded in eliciting a frustrated growl from Peridot.

“Well… I suppose we should head inside…” Pearl said with a hint of apprehension in her tone. Without any further deliberation, the group approached the hillbilly’s shack as Mabel went on ahead to knock on the door.

“Old Man McGucket! You in there?” she called. “We have something we need to…. Ask you…?” she trailed off as the brittle wooden door slowly creaked open on its own accord, allowing everyone to peak in to see the rather ruinous state the shack had been left in.

McGucket’s home wasn’t usually the cleanest, given its spot right in the heart of the junkyard, but now it certainly seemed to even more of a wreck than it usually was. What few actual possessions the hillbilly had were strewn and scattered all over the tiny shack in a chaotic, disorganized mess. And even more mysterious than the hectic state before them was the fact that McGucket himself was seemingly nowhere to be found within it.

“Whoa, it like a hurricane blew through here…” Dipper noted with a worried frown. “I wonder what could have happened?”

“Its strange…” Pearl nodded fretfully. “It almost seems like the place has been entirely abandoned, and in quite a frantic rush at that… But if Fiddleford isn’t here, then were could he-”

The white Gem cut herself off as a sudden clamor sounded from the small window on the far side of the shack. Startled, everyone tucked away behind a rather large pile of garbage to see exactly who was apparently breaking into the shack for some unknown reason. Though, ironically enough, said perpetrator just so happened to be the very hillbilly that called it home.

McGucket let out a loud cry of alarm as he haphazardly slipped in through the open window, landing hard on the other side of it into a pile of miscellaneous scraps. “Aw, conswarnit!” the hillbilly huffed, clearly exasperated as he picked himself up off the ground and began hurriedly picking through his scattered possessions. “Now where’d I put those darn things? They’ve gotta be around here somewhere! I can’t spend all day ‘round here lookin’ for ‘em! I gotta skedaddle outta here again before that confounded portal blows this whole town sky high!”

“The portal?” Ford whispered with a concerned gasp as he leaned out from behind their hiding spot a bit. However, in doing so, he accidentally happened to knock over a stray empty can from the pile, which of course, garnished McGucket’s attention the instant it hit the ground.

“Whazzit?! Who’s there?!” the hillbilly exclaimed fearfully, swiping up a nearby frying pan off the ground and brandishing it as threateningly as he could. “I got me a cast iron skillet here, and I ain’t ‘fraid to use it! I’m warnin’ ya!”

“Whoa, hey, its ok!” Steven assured as him, Dipper, Mabel, and Pearl stepped out first. Ford nearly joined them, but decided to hang back at the last second, both to make sure Peridot was restrained and out of fear as to how McGucket might react to him after so many years. “Its just us! L-long time no see, huh, Mr. McGucket?”

“Oh!” McGucket gasped with apt relief as he lowered his pan. “W-well howdy, kids! A-and howdy to you too, Miss Pearl…” he said, inclining his head in respect for the white Gem.

“H-hello again, Fiddleford,” Pearl greeted somewhat awkwardly, mostly since she know fully remembered the rapport herself and the other Gems used to have with him. “How have you been since… well, since your memories were returned to you?”

“I… gotta admit I’ve seen better days…” McGucket frowned, scratching the back of his neck as he looked down fretfully. “B-but I’m afraid I don’t got time to stand around here and catch up. I only came back here to get my handy dandy whittlin’ spoon,” he said, holding said very old, very bent up spoon up. “I gotta hightail it back to the bunker in the woods, and I reckon ya’ll do the same! It’s the only place where any of us has a chance at bein’ safe once that darn portal opens up and-”

“Uh… actually… the portal sort of… already opened,” Dipper pointed out.

“…W-what?” McGucket asked, his eyes wide with growing fear. “B-but… but that’s impossible! If that confangled portal opened up, t-then none of us would even be standin’ here right now! It would have blown us, this town, maybe even the whole entire world to smithereens! It would have started the end times, the apocalypse! And worst of all, it would have let that… darn, dastardly demon out to terrorize us all!”

“W-well, then, we certainly were lucky. It didn’t destroy everything and it didn’t let him out, thank goodness,” Pearl clarified with a sigh of relief. “But… it did bring someone else back instead…” At this, the white Gem glanced over at Ford, who still really had no idea how exactly he intended on facing his old partner, much less what to even say to him. Still, the author knew that it was either now or never, which was why he took in a deep breath to steady himself before finally stepping out of hiding to face his former friend for the first time in over 30 years.

“H-hello… Fiddleford,” Ford said with a small, bittersweet smile as he took in just how hard the passage of time had apparently been on the once youthful inventor before him. “It… certainly has been a long time… hasn’t it?”

The very moment McGucket saw Ford, his spoon and his pan instantly fell to the floor in a crash that seemed to rattle the entire shack before things quickly fell into a heavy silence. For what seemed like ages, the hillbilly simple stared at the author, his jaw dropped in apparent stunned shock and also hints of confusion, as if he was still trying to process exactly who his old friend was. None of the others really thought to interject, not even Peridot, who simply stood by the kids, completely uninvested in the ongoing situation entirely. Even so, the atmosphere between the author and the inventor was tense, yet unreadable, neither of them really knowing what to say or do next. That is, until McGucket slowly, cautiously, decided to break that silence and his own shock.

“S-Stanford…” the inventor whispered, his voice barely audible as he placed a ginger hand against his head. “I… It… it’s all comin’ back to me now… T-there were still a few gaps left in my memory b-but now… seein’ you… I… reckon they’re startin’ to fill in again…”

“Oh, w-well, then that’s good!” Ford said with something of a forced smile, one racked with hidden guilt over the fact that McGucket had lost those memories in the first place. “I… I’ve heard… Pearl and the children told me everything. A-and I’m…” The author trailed off, glancing down as if a sudden conflict had filled him before he shook his head, almost as if to clear it. “It’s… a shame what happened to you, Fiddleford, truly it is. B-but I am glad to know that you’re on the steady road to recovering from it all.”

McGucket flinched upon hearing this, his surprise filling in with something else. Something that seemed akin to hurt rather than shock. “Is… is that all?” he asked, arcing an eyebrow.

“I… yes?” Ford frowned, confused. “I suppose it is. Why do you ask?”

The inventor simply let out a small, almost harsh chuckle at this as he shook his head sardonically. “You haven’t changed a bit, have ya, Stanford?” he asked. “Looks like you’re still ridin’ on that high horse of yours’, just like you were all them years ago.”

“Wha—high horse?” the author repeated with a baffled scoff. “And what, exactly, is that supposed to mean?”

“It means, you’re still just as full of pride as you ever were, Stanford,” McGucket remarked, his tone turning a bit sourer. “Even after all these years and everythin’ that happened, you still won’t admit that you were wrong about that gosh-darn portal of yours! You still won’t admit that you made a mistake!”

“Now, that’s where you’re wrong, Fiddleford,” Ford countered evenly. “I-I will admit that the portal was a complete and utter disaster in retrospect. It was something we never should have built which is why I fixed it by dismantling it altogether. At the very least I did my best to right the wrongs I had caused, unlike someone else I happen to know.”

“W-who, me?” McGucket asked, caught off guard by this accusation.

“Yes, you,” the author clarified, crossing his arms. “After our mishap with the portal, you were the first to rush out without even sparing a second thought towards helping me stop the damage it could have potentially caused! Even Rose came back to lend a hand after she quit, but you never did, Fiddleford! From what I heard, you were far too busy essentially burying your head in the sand by using that awful invention of yours to wipe your own memories than to help fix a problem that you were just as responsible for as I was!”

“I would’ve never had to do that if your cockamamie plans hadn’t gone as far off the rails as they did!” McGucket shot back just as harshly. “I tried warnin’ ya that portal was gonna end in disaster, Stanford, we all did! But the only ones you ever listened to were yourself and that confounded ‘muse’ of yours! You were as stubborn as a springtime mule back then, and you’re every bit as stubborn now since you still can’t see just how wrong you really were!”

“I’m stubborn?” Ford gasped, appalled by such a claim. “You’re the one who’s stubborn, Fiddleford! You had so much talent, so much potential to make a name for yourself, but you always held yourself back, even as far back as when we were in college! You could never see beyond just yourself, you never dreamed of anything greater, and that’s where you always fell short! You were content to spend the rest of your days toiling away in mediocrity, and look where that’s gotten you? Even lower than that! You may blame me for the sorry state you’re in now, but as far as I can see, you did this to yourself.”

“Alright, that’s quite enough from both of you!” Pearl suddenly interjected, quickly placing herself in the middle of this brutal confrontation. Likewise, the kids also stepped forward, none of them wanting to see such an intense fight between such close former friends, even if none of them really knew how to intervene in a situation none of them really had any parts in. “Believe me, I know just how upset both of you are over this… mess. We were all very upset over it too but… its over now… Like Stanford said, the portal is gone now. M-most of our worries from all those years ago are over. We need to move on. We have to move on. After all… we have much bigger things to worry about now.”

“Yeah, like the Cluster!” Mabel exclaimed boldly.

“And the drill,” Dipper added, a bit more seriously.

“And finding out who’s going to be in charge of building said drill,” Peridot spoke up haughtily. “Which, just in case you all forgot, is going to be me!”

None of the others bothered to argue with the green Gem at this point, knowing that they had more important matters to attend to at the moment than trying to deflate her obviously massive ego. Instead, Ford collected himself, letting out a long sigh as he calmed down to address McGucket evenly. “Ah yes, that’s right. Fiddleford, the real reason why we came here was-”

“We need your help,” Pearl cut in, deciding that this would likely turn out better if she was the one to ask McGucket for his aid as opposed to Ford. “We have to construct a robot for this… competition, so to speak, and Ford and I thought we would ask you for your help on it. After all, Fiddleford, if I recall correctly, you do have quite a knack for engineering projects of this scale, and certainly your vast skill and talents would be invaluable in helping us-”

“I’m sorry, Miss Pearl, but I’m gonna have to stop ya right there,” McGucket shook his head, holding a hand up to interrupt. “I love buildin’ me a giant, rampaging robut as much as the next feller, and if it was just for you, well, I reckon I’d be more than happy to help. But I just don’t think I’m willin’ to work on another lil ‘project’ with Stanford again, ‘specially after how the last one turned out.”

“Oh, why am I not surprised?” Ford huffed crossly. “There you go, limiting yourself all over again. So much inventing and mechanical talent, and for what? For it to all go to waste while you hunker down here in the middle of a literal dump? We’re offering you a chance to assist us with what would most likely be the first worthwhile thing you’ve done in years and you’re just turning it down out of spite?”

“Believe me, Stanford, you’d know if this was outta spite,” McGucket rolled his eyes as he walked past the baffled author. “I’m turnin’ ya’ll down ‘cause I think I’ve wasted enough time puttin’ my inventing skills towards your hairbrained schemes. I reckon my so-called ‘talents’ would be better used elsewhere.”

“Elsewhere, hm…?” Peridot muttered to herself, having become gradually more intrigued by this conversation as it went along. While the green Gem still didn’t put much stock in humans and their technical abilities, she couldn’t help but think that perhaps this McGucket human could be some use to her after all, even if it was for nothing more than the sake of leveling the playing field in her favor. “In that case, I might just have an interested proposition for you, you… McHuman or whatever your name was,” she began with a knowing smirk.

“Huh? Peridot, what are you-” Steven was cut off as the green Gem suddenly shoved him back by his face so she could approach McGucket herself.

“Well, golly, take a gander at you!” the hillbilly exclaimed in amazement upon spotting the green Gem. “And who’re you supposed’ta be? Some sorta lil’ green space alien?”

“Ugh, why do all of you simple-minded humans insist on calling me that!?” Peridot huffed, annoyed.

“Probably because you actually are one,” Dipper remarked with a bit of a wry smirk.

“Ugh, Fiddleford, this,” Pearl interjected, nodding over at the miffed green Gem. “Is Peridot. She’s supposed to be helping us with this drill project, but she’s so hung up over who’s going to lead the project that she insists that we compete in some sort of… ridiculous robot battle!”

“But I thought the robot battle was your idea, Steven,” Mabel whispered over to the young Gem aside.

“Huh, you know, I thought it was too…” Steven frowned, confused.

“W-which is why,” Pearl interjected evenly. “We came to came to ask for your-”

“Which is why I’m asking for your… assistance in helping me build my own ‘robot’ device, y-you… human,” Peridot interjected quite awkwardly and completely unexpectedly at that.

“What?!” just about everyone else in the shack asked in completely baffled unison as they all turned to the green Gem with wide eyes.

“W-what do you mean you want his assistance?” Pearl asked, looking down to Peridot with apt shock. “Just awhile ago, you were claiming that human technological skills were ‘inferior’ to your own. So why would you suddenly want to team up with one now?”

“I recall saying no such thing!” Peridot huffed, putting on a front of appalled innocence really only for McGucket. “And besides, according to you two, this one is quite adept at building one of these robots, so why not have him on my side?”

“Huh, you know, she does kind of have a point…” Steven noted. “After all, 2 vs 2 is much more fair than 1 vs 3 when it comes to just about anything, from fun little minigames, to huge, intense robot battles!”

“Y-yes,” Peridot agreed staunchly as she turned back towards Ford and Pearl. “And besides, he’s already made it very clear that he has no intentions of working with you, isn’t that right…. You?” she asked, glancing back over at McGucket.

However, before the hillbilly really had a chance to say anything for himself, the author was quick to intervene. “Please, don’t be ridiculous,” Ford scoffed, crossing his arms. “Even if he doesn’t want to work with us, there’s not a single, solitary chance in the multiverse that Fiddleford would ever team with the likes of you. Why, the very thought of it is-”

“Isn’t as plum-crazy as ya’ll might think it is…” McGucket spoke up, his tone surprisingly thoughtful, though rigid determination filled it as he turned to address Peridot. “Ya want yourself a robut buildin’ partner, greenie, well, ya got one.”

“YES!” Peridot cheered, completely ignoring the hand McGucket was holding out for her to shake as she heralded her victory over Pearl and Ford. “Ha! In your soon-to-be-very-upset-because-you’re-about-to-lose faces!”

“What? Fiddleford, tell me you’re not serious about this,” Ford said, pressing his way past the green Gem to address the inventor, who simply turned away from him crossly. “You can’t work with Peridot, she’s not-”

“‘Not to be trusted’?” McGucket finished, giving the author a critical glance over his shoulder. “Well, golly, Stanford, ain’t that the pot callin’ the kettle black. Still, just ‘cause I lost just about most of my memories doesn’t mean I lost all of my senses. I know what I’m doin’ here. Do ya think I’d go around dressin’ like this if I didn’t?” he asked, adjusting his large, hole-ridden hat.

“Does he really want us to answer that?” Pearl muttered to the kids, cringing somewhat.

“Augh! Enough talking!” Peridot interrupted with an impatient groan as she broke her way into the conversation. “The sooner we get these robots built, the sooner we can decide which one of them is the better one! Which will of course be mine.”

“I think ya mean ours,” McGucket corrected firmly before sending Ford a rather knowing look as he passed by him. “Unless you’re thinkin’ you can actually keep up, Stanford. Iffin’ I recall correctly, which I’m hopin’ I do what with the whole memory erasin’ tomfoolery I went through, ya never really did have a knack for robuts like I did…”

“O-oh yeah?” Ford retorted challengingly as he followed after them, flustered. “Well we’ll just see if your so-called ‘inventing prowess’ are really just as sharp as you think they are, McGucket! Come along Pearl, children. We have a robot to build…”

“Oh my…” Pearl sighed to herself, sending a concerned glace over at Ford and McGucket in particular as they left along with everyone else. “I have a feeling this is going to be a bit of a-”

“BOT BATTLE!” Steven and Mabel cheered in excited unison, already running on ahead so they could prepare themselves for the aforementioned, no-doubt spectacular bot battle that was about to take place.

For the next several hours, the barn was alive with the sounds of buzzing saws, pounding hammers, and whirling drills. Both of the stalwart teams had plenty of materials to work with amongst the various scraps and scroungings the barn had to offer and Pearl and Ford and Peridot and McGucket alike made sure to utilize just about every piece they could get their hands on to their respective advantages. Pearl and Ford were already more than used to working together on projects such as this, though their usual team rapport was somewhat shaken by the author’s intensive drive to beat his former partner at his own game. As a result, Pearl was quick to pick up on the hectic, almost frantic pace Ford seemed to be working it, disregarding any sort of careful planning in order to complete their bot as soon as possible, a sentiment that the white Gem adopted herself whenever she so much as entertained the thought of Peridot goading her possible victory over their heads.

On the opposite end of the spectrum, Peridot and McGucket were a rather scatterbrained team themselves. The concept of “teamwork” was all but lost on the pair as they each carried out their own respective tasks in their own respective ways. The green Gem was methodical in her approach, her expertise in Homeworld tech giving her an advantage as she adapted to what she had at her disposal to build with. The hillbilly’s approach, however, seemed much more random and all over the place, to the point that it frustrated his Gem partner several times over. Needless to say that several small arguments broke out between the pair throughout the construction of their robot, yet even despite those skirmishes, progress on it carried on steadily, even if the technical vision behind it was rather mixed at best.

All the while, Steven, Dipper, and Mabel hung out around the entrance of the barn, all three of them eagerly watching the dazzling array of inventing at work before them. The kids were all unanimously excited to see what the outcome of this contest would be, even if they were largely rooting for Pearl and Ford to win. Still, they knew they were going to have to be the impartial judges of the competition to come, and together they had already thought up several challenges to put both bots through to see which team would come out on top.

“This robot contest is gonna be so cool!” Mabel exclaimed, gripping the side of the barn tightly. “Oh my gosh, you guys, you know what would be even cooler? If we built a giant robot just for us!”

“Oh, come on, Mabel,” Dipper rolled his eyes. “That’s… huh… you know what, that actually sounds like it would be pretty amazing, not gonna lie.”

“Yeah!” Steven exclaimed, enthused. “We could suit it up with all kinds of lasers and lights and we could paint it any color we want, and we could put a ton of stickers on it to make it look nice!”

“Yeah, like the one I gave Pearl and Grunkle Ford for their robot!” Mabel grinned, motioning over to the pair who was, ironically enough, fixing said colorful shooting star sticker to the side of their bot.

“Heya, kids,” Stan greeted as he, Garnet, and Amethyst made their way over to the barn. “I can’t believe you three and the ‘wonder nerds’ are still out here. What are you even doing anyway, working on building another rocket? Cause you better not be, if Pearl and Ford know what’s good for ‘em.”

“They’re not building a rocket,” Garnet clarified. “They should be working on the drill so we can stop the Cluster.”

“Well actually… we’re building robots now,” Steven shrugged with a small smile.

“Uh… why?” Amethyst asked, not following.

“We’re gonna have this huge robot contest so we can decide who’s gonna be in charge of building the drill!” Mabel informed brightly. “Its Pearl and Grunkle Ford vs. Peridot and Old Man McGucket in the Robot Rumble of the Ages! You guys gotta stick around and watch it with us!”

“Wait, what?” the purple Gem asked, still confused as she peeked into the barn. “McGucket? What’s he doing here and what’s he doin’ working with… Peridot? He used to be part of the Nerd Squad with Pearl and Ford way back when, what happened?”

“Um, its… kind of a long story…” Dipper said apprehensively. “Let’s just say McGucket and Great Uncle Ford didn’t really have the… smoothest reunion after what happened between them all those years ago.”

“Dang, I bet,” Amethyst crossed her arms. “Dude must be pretty miffed over that whole portal mess if he’s willing to pair up with Peri just to get back at Ford for it.”

“Aw, that can’t be why Mr. McGucket decided to work with Peridot,” Steven shook his head. “Can it?”

“I dunno, if I were ol’ whackjob and had a chance to take Sixer down a peg or two, I know I’d definitely take it,” Stan concluded, shrugging.

“We’ve all seen just how much McGucket went through because of Ford’s mistake with the portal,” Garnet added rationally. “In a way, I can see why he’d want to see some sort of justice for it, even if its in a small way like this.”

“Well that’s… kind of sad when you think about it…” Steven frowned as he looked back towards the barn. “If Mr. Ford and Mr. McGucket used to be such good friends, then they should be working together instead of fighting each other…”

“Don’t worry,” Garnet assured, placing a comforting hand on the young Gem’s head. “I’m sure they’ll patch things up sooner or later.”

Steven smiled halfheartedly at this, though before he could offer his thanks to the Gem leader, the sound of roaring engines rattled the entire barn. Everyone was quick to step out of the way as the first of the two robots, piloted by Pearl and Ford, gracefully rushed out of the barn and onto the lawn. The bot was sleek and elegant in its design, with thin, long metallic appendages, wheeled legs and six-pointed grips, and a small, repurposed, two seated cockpit forming its base. Overall, the machine seemed to built for speed and mobility as it swept a quick lap around the barnyard, with both the author and the white Gem controlling it in tandem before it made its swift stop before the amazed group still gathered near the barn.

“So, children,” Ford said as he stood within the cockpit, Pearl doing the same to show off her familiar blue spacesuit. “What do you think of our highly advanced automaton here?”

“Whoa…” Dipper gasped, awestruck as he stared up at the robot alongside Steven and Mabel. “So cool…”

“GIANT ROBOT!” Mabel squealed in delight. “And I love how the sticker looks on it! I told you guys it would be a nice touch!”

“Yes,” Pearl chuckled. “It certainly does pull the whole thing together, doesn’t it?”

“Ha! You think that’s a ‘robot’?” Peridot’s loud taunt sounded all the way from inside the barn as the ground began to rumble with uproarious footsteps. “Pathetic. Now… behold! My vision of ultimate power!”

With a thunderous crash, Peridot and McGucket’s bot stormed out of the barn, instantly showing just how much more bulky and sturdy it was. Its overall color scheme, dictated by Peridot, was green, and its appendages were stout yet strong, with massive pinching claws and a sharply pointed cockpit where the pair sat side-by-side to control it. Both the hillbilly and the green Gem let out their own rowdy, wild gales of laughter as they paraded their hulking machine around freely.

“Now this is what I call a robut!” McGucket proclaimed proudly as he leaned out of the cockpit a bit. “What do ya’ll think about our lil’… whazzit?”

“Hey!” Peridot shouted, equally as baffled as she realized just how much Pearl and Ford’s bot towered over their own.

“Ours is taller!” Pearl quickly exclaimed, raising the robot’s hand. “We win!”

“Ladies and gentle-Gems!” Steven announced, stepping up onto a small box beside the chalkboard where a scoreboard was already set up for the oncoming contest. “Welcome to the first annual Robolymics!”

“Woo!” Amethyst cheered as her, Garnet, and Stan sat along on the sidelines to watch the competition unfold.

“Psst, Garnet,” Stan whispered over to the Gem leader. “You wanna place a bet on which one of these nerd teams is gonna take home the prize? The smart money’s on the munchkin and the hillbilly over there.”

“Hmph,” Garnet smirked, adjusting her shades before shaking the conman’s hand. “You’re on.”

“This competition will test our robo-engineers’ skills of robo-construction and robo-piloting,” Steven continued on in explaining the rules.

“There are several rounds you all will have to go through,” Dipper added. “And whoever wins the most of them gets to be in charge of building the drill. Understood?”

All four of the competitors nodded firmly, even if they were more focused on seizing up the competition rather than really listening to the rules. “Great!” Mabel exclaimed, holding up a checkered flag before throwing it down dramatically. “Then let the robo-games begin!”

And with that, the competition kicked off without any further delay. The kids made sure to spell out the rules of each successive round to the teams, each of which was conceived to prove which group was better at designing and building the more functional machine. The first several rounds were largely standard fare, testing various aspects of the robots including balance, jumping capabilities, weapon capacity, speed, and strength. However, in order to fully prove which robot was better and which team was more up to the engineering task, the kids had devised a few non-sequitur categories to see which bot was the more well-rounded of the two. The robots had a chance to test out their artistic sides when it came to the dance and painting categories (the latter of which Amethyst gladly volunteered to be a model for and the result of which ended up being subjective overall). Other rounds were a bit more random, from jumping jacks, to yoga, to tug of war, to a game of ‘robo chess’, yet each game was indeed completely designed to prove who was the best of the best when it came to engineering and inventing. However, by the time just about every category had been decided, it seemed as though the contest overall would be destined to end in a tie, even up to the final, supposedly deciding category.

“Alright, everyone, this is the final event!” Steven announced, still stationed beside the chalkboard with the twins as the robots approached the pair of trucks there were supposed to toss to test their strength even further.

“You got this, P!” Amethyst cheered, shoving a handful of popcorn into her mouth.

“Get it, girl!” Garnet added just as supportively.

“Uh, y-yeah, but try not to win too much out there, ya nerds!” Stan taunted, remembering the bet he had made with Garnet.

“Ok, ready…. Set… CHUCK!” Steven shouted, and on that command, both teams’ bots tossed their respective trucks forward as hard as they possibly could. The vehicles sailed swiftly through the air, soaring high and far before they both disappeared over the mountain ridge countless miles away. All of the spectators were aptly stunned by such a powerful, incredible display, even if it really gave them no indication as two who might have won this final challenge.

“Um… well, looks like you both get a point on that one!” Mabel decided, marking a tally down on the chalkboard for both teams.

“Hm,,,,” Steven mused, looking over the final results as both teams waited eagerly to hear the outcome. “Well, it looks like our final score is… a tie! That settles it; everyone gets to lead the project together!”

“Aw, man, well that’s anticlimactic…” Amethyst pouted, leaning back on her seat.

“Yeah, it is!” Stan grumbled. “If the stupid contest ends in a tie, then who wins the bet?”

“Just wait,” Garnet advised, nodding back to the bots themselves.

“NO!” Peridot suddenly shouted, enraged by these unsatisfactory results. “This isn’t over! I demand that we have a tiebreaker!”

“Y-yes, so do I!” Ford exclaimed quite suddenly.

“What?” Pearl asked, completely baffled by her partner’s impulsiveness. “Ford, why-”

“We need to have a definitive winner here!” the author quickly cut her off before glaring down at McGucket in particular. “We need to decide who’s right and who’s wrong…”

“Aw, conswarnit, Ford!” McGucket snapped in apt frustration. “It’s a dog-gone tie! Just let it go already!”

“Oh of course you would tell me to simply ‘let it go’, Fiddleford,” Ford scoffed coldly. “Just like how you let go of all your own memories just because you couldn’t find a better way to cope with them!”

“But I got ‘em back, ya stubborn ol’ fool!” McGucket countered every bit as harshly. “And I’m tryin’ to move on, which is what you oughta be doin’ instead of clingin’ onto the past just cause ya think there’s somethin’ back in it that’ll prove you didn’t build a machine that could’ve destroyed the world even though that’s exactly what ya diddly darn did.”

“Ugh, enough of this!” Pearl interupted sternly, tired of being stuck in the middle of this constant conflict. “Let’s all just give it a rest already! We don’t need any other final competition to decide anything. This is it, we tied. We’re the same, we’re all equals here. Let’s finally just move on already.”

“No!” Peridot cut in fiercely, gripping her robot’s controls tightly. The bot lurched forward and before McGucket could even make a move to counter the green Gem, its claws latched onto one of the other robot’s tall legs tightly, holding it in place. “You’re just a Pearl and a human! You both are beneath me! I’ll always be better than you, and nothing I’ve seen today will ever change that!”

“Oh, for crying out loud, not this again…” Ford groaned, exasperated.

“Well, have you ever seen a Pearl do this?!” Pearl exclaimed, suddenly taking full control of the bot as she swung it’s leg around to kick the other robot back hard. Peridot and McGucket’s bot landed hard and flat on its back as the others all gasped in shock, all of them quite intrigued and somewhat alarmed by the rather violent twist this contest had taken.

“Ohoh, so you wanna fight, huh?” Peridot asked challengingly as McGucket maneuvered the robot back up. “Good! We should have done this from the beginning!”

At this, their robot slammed into the taller bot, tackling it with an immense amount of force. Pearl and Ford managed to hold their own as they pressed it back, neither side making much edgeway as they struggled against each other.

“Whoa, looks like things just got a heck of a whole lot more interesting!” Stan grinned, perking up in his seat as he watched all of the action unfold.

“STOP!” Steven cried fretfully as Ford and Pearl’s bot landed a brutal punch on Peridot and McGucket’s. “Giant robots shouldn’t fight!”

“Yeah! Not unless its in some sort of cool action movie or cartoon or something!” Mabel added just as worriedly.

“Fight! Fight! Fight! Fight!” Stan and Amethyst cheered in delighted encouragement, thoroughly invested in the ongoing battle. Of course, their cheers soon stopped as Peridot and McGucket’s bot suddenly hoisted Ford and Pearl’s up and tossed it towards the spectating crowd, forcing them all to scatter away from the brutal crash landing.

“Pearl!” Steven cried upon spotting the damage done to the bot and the pair within it.

“Great Uncle Ford!” Dipper exclaimed, also quite alarmed.

“It’s alright, everyone!” Pearl assured as they pulled the robot back up. “We’ve got this!”

“Be careful!” Mabel urged fretfully.

“Kick ‘em in the butt!” Amethyst quipped daringly.

“O-or ya know, don’t do that!” Stan countered. “Especially since I’ve got good money on the line here…”

The moment Pearl and Ford’s bot was back on its feet, Peridot and McGucket wasted no time slamming their robot’s claws into it once more. Several more brutal blows were passed back and forth between the two bots, sustaining damage to both, but taking neither of them down in the process. Needless to say that tensions were high between both teams, especially as they locked hands once more, though it was clear that the brute strength of Peridot and McGucket’s bot was starting to win out against Pearl and Ford’s much more lanky, feeble one.

“Stanford, this is a bunch of cockamamie nonsense and ya know it is!” McGucket exclaimed over the din of battle. “Why can’t ya just admit that you were wrong and be done with it!?”

“Because I’m not wrong!” Ford argued, pushing the robot’s controls harder. “At least not anymore! I already told you, I fixed my mistakes! I’m still fixing my mistakes and I’m not going to stop until I’ve fixed them all!”

“Well, then I reckon, you’ll likely never stop then,” McGucket said with a bitter, hurt scowl. “Cause there’s still one mistake of yours that you ain’t even started tryin’ to fix yet!”

“W-what are you-” Before Ford could even finish, McGucket pushed hard against the controls of his and Peridot’s bot out of sheer anger alone, shoving Pearl and Ford’s back hard. In the back seat of the cockpit as he was, Ford in particular reeled back, his loose grip on the controls costing him as he ended up falling backwards out of his seat entirely.

“Stanford!” both Pearl and McGucket gasped in sudden alarm as the author fell out of the rather tall bot towards the ground below. Unfortunately, the white Gem wasn’t quick enough to maneuver her bot to catch him in time, and as a result, Ford landed hard, the blow easily sending him into a daze and greatly startling just about everyone present. Though, surprisingly enough, the one who seemed the most fearfully concerned was none other than McGucket himself.

“Ford!” the inventor cried, not even hesitating to leap out of the robot, leaving Peridot to control it alone and all but abandoning the battle entirely to rush over to the fallen author’s side. Still, the green Gem was hardly upset by this as she instead gained full control over the robot, ripping Pearl’s attention away from Ford as the robot’s clawed hands landed a brutal punch against hers.

“Good,” Peridot sneered challengingly. “I’m glad we finally got those pesky humans out of the way. This is between you and me anyway, you Pearl!”

Before Pearl could even say anything, the green Gem shoved her back again, keeping her from seeing if Ford was alright or not. Fortunately, McGucket was already on that case as he ran over to Ford and wasted no time in checking him over for any sort of serious injuries. “S-Stanford!” the hillbilly exclaimed, his tone rife with concern. “Ford, a-are you alright? W-wake up! Say somethin’ to me!”

Fortunately, the author wasn’t out of it for too long as he let out a small groan at this, placing a hand against the side of his head as he slowly opened his eyes to meet the hillbilly’s worried gaze. “Mm? F-Fiddleford?” Ford asked in rather bleary confusion as he struggled to sit up on his own. “W-what are you doing? What about the robots… and the contest? I thought you-”

“Aw, forget about that silly ol’ contest,” McGucket shook his head. “I needed to come over ‘n make sure ya didn’t knock that big ol’ genius brain of yours too hard after I… ya know, knocked ya outta your robut and all…”

“W-what…?” Ford frowned, still bewildered, especially as McGucket offered a hand to help steady him. “I… I don’t understand. You only teamed up with Peridot b-because… because of what I…” The author paused, trying his hardest to collect his thoughts and how he wanted to say them, only to fail completely. “I… I just… I didn’t think you still-”

“Cared?” McGucket finished with a small, but knowing smile. “Aw, hornswaggle, Stanford. I may have forgotten ya for almost 30 years, but deep down in my gut, I don’t think I could have ever stopped carin’ about ya.”

For a moment, Ford simply stared at his old partner in complete and utter baffled silence, unsure of how to even react to such a warm, kind sentiment after just how much he had wronged McGucket in the past. So, instead of saying anything, he simply let out a small chuckle of acceptance as he finally accepted the hillbilly’s hand to help him up and lead him to somewhere safer away from the bot battle still raging on behind them just as violently as ever.

“This is pointless!” Peridot shouted as she pressed her bot roughly against Pearl’s once more. “There’s no way you’re gonna beat me! You’re an accessory! Somebody’s shiny toy! Where do you get off acting like you’re your own Gem?!” At this the green Gem’s bot finally managed to get the upper hand over the white Gem’s, as its clawed hand completely pride one of the thin arms off of the lankier bot in a single, swift yank. “You’re just a PEARL!”

Pearl winced back at this, this singular reminder of exactly the kind of Gem she was made to be much harsher and more painful than she knew it should have been. The white Gem knew, and she had always known, that her lot, at least according to Homeworld’s standards, was to stand by and serve and little else. Her caste wasn’t meant to think or to act or to do anything for anyone other than whatever Gem they were given to. There had indeed been a time when Pearl herself had been exactly that; just another piece of empty, thoughtless property in Homeworld’s rigid, unfulfilling system. And yet… the Earth, humans, her fellow Crystal Gems, they had all shown her she could be so much more than that. She could go beyond what she was made for, she could be her own person, her own Gem. She could think and feel for herself and she could take pride in who she was and what she did and she had. And so, that’s exactly what she planned on showing.

“That’s right!” Pearl proclaimed, rising up a bit out of her seat as she faced Peridot fiercely. “I am a PEARL!” With that, the white Gem swung her first hard, striking Peridot squarely in the jaw and catching her completely off guard.

“WHOO-HOO!” Amethyst cheered loudly on the sidelines as everyone else gasped in amazement at such boldness on the Pearl’s part.

“Whoa, who knew Pearl could pack a punch like that?” Stan remarked, unable to hide the fact that even he was genuinely impressed with the white Gem.

“I think we did…” Ford remarked, exchanging a small smirk with McGucket as they both silently recalled just how resilient Pearl could be when she needed to be.

As a result of the white Gem’s blow, Peridot’s bot stumbled back a bit, allowing Pearl time to pick hers’ up off the ground to pick the fight right back up where it had left off. “What you’re saying may be true,” the white Gem said as her robot sprang high into the air above Peridot’s before it began coming down in what would certainly be a hard and heavy kick. “But it doesn’t matter! I’m still gonna kick your butt!”

By this point, just about everyone was cheering Pearl on as she came in for what would possibly be her final blow against the green Gem. Or at least it would have been if Peridot’s bot hadn’t managed to catch one of the long legs of Pearl’s bot at the very last second.

“…Uh oh,” the white Gem muttered, though she had no time to break free from the hold. Immediately, Peridot’s robot slammed Pearl’s hard into the ground, repeating the action several times over until she finally plowed the taller robot down hard, more or less completely breaking it beyond repair as its pieces went flying.

“Pearl!” the others all exclaimed in apt concern as they collectively hurried over to check on the fallen white Gem. Despite the harsh, defeating blow she had suffered, Pearl was only mildly stunned by it, even if she did look much worse for wear as she lay against the wrecked remains of her robot.

Peridot hardly paid them any mind however as she leapt out of her robot, her face still bruised from the punch Pearl had landed on her, though her expression was bright with the satisfaction of her triumph. “Victory is mine!” she proclaimed proudly. “Now I’m the one in charge! Praise me! Praise me!”

“Pearl, are you ok?”

“Huh?” Peridot blinked, caught off guard by the fact that the others were all surrounding the white Gem rather than her.

“A-ah yes… I’m alright…” Pearl smiled as she allowed Steven to help her up.

“Yeah, P!” Amethyst exclaimed, giving the white Gem a sudden congratulatory hug. “Aw, that was awesome! You were so hardcore!”

“Oh really?” Pearl chuckled, rubbing her arm with a flustered smile.

“Oh yeah,” Garnet readily agreed.

“Yeah, Pearl, you were the best!” Mabel exclaimed excitedly.

“Seriously, you were,” Dipper added firmly. “And you punching Peridot in the face like that has to be one of the coolest things I’ve ever seen.”

“It was indeed a very impressive display,” Ford nodded with a smirk.

“We couldn’tve done it any better ourselves, Miss Pearl,” McGucket said, tipping his hat in respect for the white Gem.

“Eh, it was passable,” Stan shrugged, unconcerned as he leaned over to Garnet. “So uh… you gonna pay up or what, shades? Cause it looks like greenie just won our bet for me.”

“Did she?” Garnet countered, her arms crossed as she smiled somewhat mysteriously.

“Uh… yeah?” the conman frowned, confused. “Pretty sure she did, right?”

“Y-yes, I did win!” Peridot spoke up, frustrated. “So why aren’t any of you listening to me!? I’m the natural leader here! She’s just a common Pearl! A-and those two!” she snapped, pointing at Ford and McGucket. “They’re just simple humans! I’m the one in charge here, not any of them!”

“You’re wrong!” Steven argued readily. “If Pearls are really like you say they are, then Pearl isn’t common at all! She trained herself to fight! She learned how to build things! And she works hard every day to be greater than she already is!”

“And while we’re at it, your pretty much completely wrong when it comes to humans too, especially when it comes to McGucket and Great Uncle Ford,” Dipper said knowingly.

“Yeah! Both of them are like total geniuses!” Mabel agreed earnestly. “They’ve built all sorts of crazy neat stuff like big huge futurey portals or mind-erasing laser guns, and yeah, maybe those things weren’t always used for good reasons, but they’re still pretty amazing on their own and so are the guys who built them!”

“Seriously, how do you not get it by now, Peridot?” Dipper finished as he smiled back towards the white Gem, the author, and the inventor. “There isn’t anything ‘common’ or ‘simple’ about anyone here.”

Needless to say that Peridot was just about completely baffled by such a thought, to the point that, for perhaps the first time ever, she was completely speechless.

“Come on, everyone,” Garnet said, turning towards the nearby wreckage. “Let’s clean this mess up.”

“Yo, Pearl, you should come wrestling with me some time,” Amethyst joked as they all began to walk away.

“Mm… I dunno…” Pearl frowned, rubbing the sore spot on her arm as they began to pick up the scattered robotic wreckage.

“You know, I bet if we combined the sturdy base of the robot you and Peridot built,” Ford began, speaking to McGucket. “With the speed and agility of our robot, then we could certainly build a force to be reckoned with!”

“Now you’re talkin’!” McGucket exclaimed, enthused by the idea.

“B-but I won!” Peridot argued hotly, not moving from her spot. “What about the rules?!”

None of the others so much as even acknowledged the green Gem, save for Garnet, who simply turned towards her and shrugged simply. “Welcome to Earth.”

Peridot was once again stunned into silence at this, the harsh realization hitting her that even though she technically “won”, she really had no victory to claim at all. After all, the possibility that she could have ever been wrong was something the green Gem couldn’t have ever anticipated and yet… her experiences during her brief time on Earth so far had already proved her wrong about more than she could have ever thought possible. So… perhaps, as ludicrous as it might seem, there was a chance she could have been wrong about Pearls and humans alike as well.

Though it took some doing, eventually everyone had managed to gather up all of the scattered pieces of Pearl and Ford’s robot and organize them back in the barn with the rest of the parts they were likely to use for the drill. Despite his best arguments against the Gem leader, Stan never did end up getting his money from his bet with Garnet, though considering the circumstances, he didn’t really mind as much as him and Amethyst were invested in asking Pearl about her defining blow against Peridot, something that still greatly amused them both. By the time the work was all finished however, the conman returned to the shack for the evening, leaving Ford and the twins behind to help the Gems out with the drill in whatever way they could in the following days of its construction. And though McGucket knew he wasn’t really obligated to stay either, he did hang back for a bit before heading back to his home at the dump, supposedly for the sake of analyzing the robot him and Peridot had made for any possible further invention ideas. Ford, however, had a feeling the inventor was sticking around for some other reason, and, picking up on that reason, he decided that now was as good a time as any to speak his piece to his former partner.

“Fiddleford?” the author began as he stepped up beside the hillbilly.

“Yes, Stanford?” McGucket asked with a bit of an amicable smile as he looked up towards his old friend.

It was a smile that Ford was hard pressed to return as he awkwardly averted the inventor’s gaze, taking in a deep breath as he tried to figure out exactly what it was he wanted to say. “I… um… well, you see I… erm… you know what? Here,” Ford took pause as he reached into his coat and pulled out a small, colorful square, which he handed off to McGucket, who took it with wide eyes of wonder.

“I-is… is this…?”

“Y-yes, that’s right, it’s a Cubic’s Cube,” Ford nodded. “I… remembered how much you used to enjoy working on them years ago, and… I just so happened to find one of your old ones lying around the old lab so… I figured I’d give it back to you as something of a-” The author cut himself off as McGucket presented the cube back to him, all of its scrambled colors perfectly lined up again in almost no time at all. “Well then,” Ford remarked, impressed as he looked over the cube. “Seems as though you really are just as sharp as I remember you being, Fiddleford.”

“Eh, its all that newfangled muscle memory or whatever it is the kids are callin’ it these days,” McGucket shrugged humbly. The pair shared a brief laugh before the author let out something of a small, sad sigh as he looked away from the inventor yet again.

“Fiddleford, I… I should have said this earlier but… I’m sorry,” he finally relented, hanging his head a bit in genuine shame. “I truly am. You were right back then and you’re still right now; I was wrong the entire time and I was far too blinded by my own pride and my dreams of grandure to see that. Honestly, if anything I should have apologized to you 30 years ago. Maybe if I had it would have spared you from… well, you know…”

“Aw, shucks,” McGucket shook his head. “Y’know, Stanford, I thought all I wanted to hear outta ya was an apology, but now that I’m actually getting’ it, I can’t help but feel as though you were actually right.”

“A-about what?”

“About how I up and did all this to myself,” the hillbilly said, sighing himself this time. “You weren’t the one who made me erase all my memories, I did that all on my own. I’ve spent so long forgettin’… Maybe I should try forgivin’ instead… C’mere, old friend.” With this, McGucket opened his arms out wide to offer the author a hug, and though Ford wasn’t often physical when it came to showing affection, it was an offer he couldn’t possibly turn down.

“Hm,” Ford grinned as their hug disbanded a moment later and their sights turned back to the robot before them. “You know, despite everything, this machine really is quite impressive… It’s sort of embarrassing to admit this, but… it looks like your engineering skills still far surpass mine. Which is why I’d be honored if you’d help the Gems, the kids, and me out with the drill. We’ll need someone adept at the craft as you to help us make sure the job’s done right.”

“Well, golly, Stanford,” McGucket smirked knowingly. “I think I’d be downright honored to work with ya’ll again, especially on somethin’ like this that’s gonna help people instead of hurtin’ ‘em for a change.”

“So it’s a deal then?” Ford grinned, holding out his hand to his former, now-returned partner.

“It’s a deal,” McGucket gladly agreed, shaking the author’s hand to solidify his desire to help.

As this touching exchange went on, Pearl couldn’t help but smile softly to herself as she watched it from afar. In truth, she had always enjoyed building and inventing alongside both Ford and McGucket back in the day, and the thought of getting the change to do so again brought genuine excitement and delight to the white Gem. But even more than that, she was glad to see that peace had finally returned between the author and the inventor, and with that peace came the chance to let go of the painful memories of the past and creature better, happier memories in the future.

“Ahem,” Pearl’s train of thought was interupted, surprisingly enough, by none other than Peridot. The green Gem had come to stand alongside her, an upside down drill in hand as she averted the taller Gem’s gaze sheepishly. “I-I have to admit, its… remarkable that a Pearl such as yourself could become such a… knowledgeable technician. Mm…” Peridot hesitated, still clearly swallowing her pride as she presented the white Gem the drill she was holding. “Why don’t we get started?”

Pearl couldn’t help but smile in slight amusement as she knelt down and took the drill from Peridot and turned it around. “You’re holding it upside down,” she informed before handing the tool back to the green Gem.

“Y-yes, of course,” Peridot remarked, flustered. “You know… those round appendages on your machine could be useful for something.”

“They’re called wheels,” Pearl said, still smirking. With this, the white Gem stood and led Peridot over to Ford and McGucket so the four of them could begin planning out their ideas for the drill together. Though the green Gem was still somewhat uncertain about the thought of working with a Pearl and a pair of humans, she decided that it was something she was just going to have to get used to for the sake of the greater good. After all, just about everything on Earth was strange to her, so how was the prospect of working with unlikely allies such as these any stranger than anything else she had already seen thus far?

As the four technicians met up and began throwing drill ideas back and forth, they were all largely unaware of the kids watching them from afar at their spot near the barn. Needless to say that all three of them were more than glad to see that peace and acceptance had won the day, even despite how intense the preceding bot battle had been. “Well, you guys,” Steven began, offering a smile to Dipper and Mabel. “It looks like we’re well on our way to stopping the Cluster.”

“Its about time too,” Dipper said with a bit of a grin as he crossed his arms. “The sooner we stop the Earth from literally imploding from the inside out, the better. And who knows? With Pearl, and Ford, and McGucket all working together, maybe building this whole drill thing could be kinda fun.”

“‘Grrrr, fun for me you mean!’” Mabel roared playfully, taking on a gruff tone as she held the Cluster sock puppet up.

“Oh no!” Steven cried in faux dramatics. “It’s the Cluster!”

Mabel kept playing along as she growled once more, this time pouncing on both boys and easily knocking them both to the ground, all three of them laughing all the while. “‘You think you can stop meeeee?!’” she taunted, more or less tickling both Steven and Dipper with the puppet by this point as a way of ‘attacking’ them.

“Aw, c-come on, Mabel!” Dipper laughed, struggling to get away. “Cut it out!”

Mabel simply roared through the puppet once more as the impromptu game continued, though needless to say all three of the kids were having a great time through it. “Ah! We’re doomed!” Steven chuckled breathlessly, even though they really weren’t.

And yet… if they failed to finish the drill and truly stop the Cluster on time, then there was no telling just how true that statement just might turn out to be.

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