#hyper fart

[sweetbubblies]

what was zhönglï's most DANGEROUS fart like

If we’re talking the most collateral damage? That was couple of thousand year ago; the same bout of gas that lead to the geo lord’s strong dislike of seafood.

————————————————————————

Many years ago it was common for massive fish that swam in what would become the harbor, one catch could feed a whole village for at least a month. Creature of this size made perfect meals for hungry dragons like Morax.

Though one mild spring day after one these salty meals the meat of the fish didn’t seem to be settling right in his stomach. It was causing a loud persistent rumbling along with gas cramps that were uncomfortable to say the least. All day the mortals in village were feeling the ground rumble as their god tried desperately to soothe his restless guts

*BRRRRRROOOOOOOOMMMMPPP!!* *FRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRPPPPP*

*PPRRRRRRRRRAAAAAPPPPPPPP!!!*

“Blasted fish….” Morax growl lifting his tail again to let out another fart, shaking the mountain he called home “I have half a mind to gut them all for..hnmmg” *BRAAAP* “…doing this to an archon”

The dragon groaned in pain as his stomach gave another loud upset rumble, making him clutch his gut and double over. Raising his tail once more Morax grit his teeth and pushed “Hrrrgghn..!!”

*PPPPPPPPPPPBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRTTTTTTTTTTTTTT!!! BPPPPPPPPPPAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRTTTR!!! PPPPPRRRPPP!! BRRRRRRAAAAAPPPPP!!*

He unleashed a fart so powerful it blew a hole in the side of the mountain, sending boulders crashing down to the valley below, crushing trees and houses while knocking countless innocent birds from the sky with the stench. At the archon felt much better but still as he finally relaxed his tail all he muttered was “Never again….”

[fattestwriting]

Funny how you describe everyone else but your experience you did something embarrassing didn't you Ragatha

I- pfft- I would never!

During her first day's in-house challenge she got so anxious she fumagated the entire grounds. Even nowadays you'll sometimes catch the smell lingering around...

[heavypressure]

Of course I'd love to be plugged up and inflated by my own gas at any moment, but I'm also a fan of just being uncontrollably gassy in public.. Just taking a walk in a mall, and my belly suddenly bloats up to resemble a taut beach ball, ripping my shirt in pieces.. Loud cacophony of gurgles and roars, gas bubbles rushing through my bowels making my entire belly shake and rumble like a volcano ready to erupt.. It all happens so fast I don't even have the time to process that I'm about to explode from both ends, and i start endlessly belching and farting.. It doesn't help at all, and my poor belly seems only to continue getting bigger and bigger, no matter how quick my body tries to expell the tremendous amount of gas . Just a few minutes after, I'm literally immobile from how huge my balloon of a gut is, non stop roaring and loud farting attracting all of the onlookers...

[gassydumbjocks]

Its Good To Be A Man

Tyler close the door and throw himself to the sofa, exhausted after a day of work thanking it was finally over. He worked at a pretty good company, but being the only gay guy in his department and having to deal with homophobes and sexist co-workers was sometimes too much for him, so he thought about watching a movie or a tv show maybe to relax and sleep.

He started to look up in his VHS Cassettes' box and soon noticed that strangely, a new one was there, it didn't got any cover or stuff, and just had written "Its good to be a man" as the only title on it, he found it weird, but then supposed perhaps that his dumb jock of a roommie got it and put it with his stuff "I've told him not to touch my things like a million times, when is that brute gotta learn"

He had to admit the curiousity was hitting him, it was probably a home made video recorded by Connor and his gross buddies, but boy... after all, he was gay, and all of Connor's friends were toned ripped jocks from the gym (with a brain of a peanut size, but hot after all)

Thinking "maybe its just their excersizes routines... guess it wouldn't hurt to see" feeling a bit of a lust mood running in his body "ok, just a couple minutes...but i swear, if its just them having a belch off, im burning this" he said.

Putting the tape in the tv player, he clicked to put the video, and all of a sudden, the typical static sound shows, then a simple white screen, making Tyler raise an eyebrow, before what seemed to be a variety show intro plays, a smiling man in a suit which he supposed was the host, along a bunch athletic shirtless men with dumb expressions who followed next to him appeared in screen.

"Good to see ya again my brothers!" The host announces "this is your program where you learn how to be real MEN", as if it was a cue, the stud-bodied-like guys all grunted and beated their chests, like they were gorillas making a chanting "Uh!, Uh!, Uh!" and flexed their arms, making the audience laugh loudly, with those cocky grins Tyler knew so well, he rolled his eyes.

Making the host laugh aswell, he patted one of them in the back "That's what i talk about" he joked "Alright folks, tonight we'll indulge into an intense session of what it means to be a man, these guys here will serve as examples in showing you all stuff boys MUST do to become the alpha macho men they truly are" he adds, then, smirking, he takes a small device from his suit pocket.

"This little thing here made sure to leave them empty headed and obey any manly command given to them, just as it'll make sure to do the same for you, ma boy" he suddenly announces.

"...The hell?" Tyler said, arching his look again as he watched them "is this some bullshit hypnosis crap or?..." he asked

"That's right, dudes! Lets begin" the host shouted. "It's time to show off around what you're made of! We'll do something primal, no pun intented" he joked "We'll now do the first category: BURPING!, so, let's hear those nice bassy burps!" he says, turning to the group of jocks, as he pressed a button of that device.

Immediatly, they started to release loud and deep monsters of burps, at unison, as if they were in trance, still with those dumb expressions, and Tyler could swear he saw how one of them got his eyes crossed with a complete fool face.

Even worse, Tyler felt a strange urge to burp himself too. He tried to resist, but the feeling was overwhelming, he rubbed his gut hoping to calm it down, but he just letted out a loud, embarrassing belch, blushing immediatly

"Wha-BOOOOUUURRP?- Is happening?!" he said between belches, a little ashamed.

"Excellent!" the host cheered. "This is what i call a manly symphony!, but we also know there is another way to do that, right?" He asks the public with a mischevous grin "FARTING is a big part in the bonding among men, so, we just have to, let it rip right?" He asked again, as he pressed that little button.

Some of the guys turned around to show their butts, other simply proceed to lift their legs, but they all did the same, at the command of "letting rip" they instantly started a worthy orchestra of simultaneous farts, each sounding grosser and deepest than the last one

Tyler was grossed out and sick, he wanted it to stop, but as he bend over a bit over to approach the tv, his butt felt the need to drop a massive, and nasty monster of a deep fart, the loudest he've ever letted out, he could feel his butt vibrating at that one, sitting normally again, horrified and trying to cover his butt with his hands.

"This-BOOOOOOOUUUUURRRRRPP!" He belched "Is a nightmare!..."

PPPPPPPPPPPPRRRRRTTTT!!!

That last fart seemed to do something on Tyler, he kept one second silent before, turning his head to the tv again, now with a dumb and foolish grin adorning his face "hahaha, dudee, i need to quit the bean dip next timee" he said in a lower, more manly voice.

"Whew! Guys! Ok ok its enough! Hahaha" The always happy host said, as he waved his hand to make the smell go away, as the dumb bunch of men kept blasting bombs out of their butts "Geez, dont anybody here think on turning on a lighter" he said bursting in laughing, making Tyler laugh too at the stupid joke.

"But for now, this is all we got for today's emmision, bros, we're glad that you could come with us in this, stinky, foul and manly lessons that every man needs to apply in his everyday, till the next program! Boys? Would you like to wave goodbay?" he asked with a grin.

The camera showed each of them, now it was sure they all had that same cross-eyed look and dumb smiles, like Tyler did, the staff offered a can of a kind of soda to one of them, which he drank in a single gulp, before removing it from his lips "GOOOD BYEEEEAAAAUUURRRRRP!" A massive belch came out, as he succesfully burp-talked, gaining again the laughs and applause from all the people in the set.

Meanwhile with Tyler, at the same time he also relaxed his muscles, and lifted a leg as he felt some pressure in his lower abdomen, he knew very well what that meant "Bombs away!" he said proudly, before the smelly, big and long fart made its way out of his crack.

PPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRTTTTTT!!!

"Hahah!" he chuckled "i think i just ruined my undies"

[aesfocus]

What I have learned in the last 6 hours

likes: + zooming around and around and around + the humble bright plastic spring + snugs and purrs + soft gentle bites onto fingers and toes + screens moving in any way dislikes: + the sound of human farts + the door to the bedroom opening + popcorn(another cat) pawing at the door + ronso(another cat) getting the zoomies across the house + mirrors

[genisflyingkites]

Them

Broooooo this tag team is so genius I want them to win it all

[gorygoodboy]

“🍖🩷~”

“🍖🩷💨~”

[heavypressure]

Ah, to be a deity in some fantasy village where people belive that a huge gassy belly is a sign of prosperity, good health and plentiful harvest . They choose a person as a deity in their village that they must feed every day to the limit to make sure they ensured their village's prosperity.

Every day, I'm fed at least 8 times, every time until my belly is tight as a drum, i am never even close to being just comfortably full. My diet consists of mainly fruits, vegetables and pastries, so my gut always bloats even further after each feeding session because of all of the gas my body produces.

I would have several people as my servants, they tend to all of my stomach's needs . My bubbling cauldron of a belly is of course prone to gas cramps, and the servants are always ready to massage my poor stretched middle to find a bubble of stuck air and push it out. Every loud fart or belch is considered a good sign, and my whole purpose is reduced to producing gas..

After some time of being constantly stretched to it's limits, my belly can get as big as someone's full-term pregnant with quintuplets, and that's just from gas and food. Of course I'm mainly immobile at this point, and other people in the village can come to my chamber to rub my gut and coax some gas from my bowels for good luck

[dasniffer]

Having a Community of People to share my one off Fetish Story Idea’s with is genuinely such a blessing.

Forge - Super Hero who can create indestructible metal armor and constructs

Quake - Every Action She Makes Creates Destructive Shockwaves. She also has just about every stomach issue you could imagine. Her farts can level a skyscraper.

Forge has to constantly create constructs to prevent her from destroying the world every time she gets a craving for Taco Bell, annoyed every time he shows up to her sheepishly blushing outside of a Mexican restaurant, but he still loves her.

[tache-noire]

Is it "the writer's barely disguised fetish" or is it toilet humor in a children's show, which has been a constant for some 50 years because children think it's funny and it's written for them, not you.

[mahariel-s]

my wife and i were gonna go on a date yesterday that i planned, it would be reminiscent of a date we had in the beginning of our relationship (nothing too fancy, scenic city block stroll, pizza at a nice place, movie at a nice theater) and we were both excited but then tragedy struck!!! my wife realized... they had no idea where their wedding band was!! we looked all over and couldn't find it and, well, it's lost, c'est la vie as they say.

they were simply too distraught to go out after that, so we switched gears and put the money we would've spent going out towards getting a replacement band, and we ordered in some pizza (we tried a new kind!) and had a RUNESCAPE DATE!!!! :D

we did some god wars dungeoning and killed a boss for the first time together. they were so happy and honestly were glowing and smiling and feeling so much better about the ring

i love my wife, i love our dates, i love seeing them smile, i love that we can light a few candles and dim the lighting and play lofi and have such a fun and intimate time playing games together and it's as much fun as we would have had going out lol. inside dates are underrated

[087710]

buster is trying to bully me into giving him this popcorn cauliflower, but he doesn't understand that it isn't the normal one, this is the buffalo flavor and after our onion ring scare im being more vigilant

[prokopetz]

Essential genres of British comedy:

Boring man grapples with absurd circumstances

Boring man is unaware of the absurdity of his circumstances

Boring man becomes aware of the absurdity of his circumstances

Boring man is aware of, but does not acknowledge, the absurdity of his circumstances

Boring man's peers fail to acknowledge the absurdity of his circumstances

Boring man hyper-focuses on seemingly insignificant detail of absurd circumstances

Boring man inappropriately reacts as though mundane circumstances are absurd

Boring man's mundane faux pas provokes absurd reaction

Farts, the great equaliser

[gothghostiie]

You are really feeding my inner slut with task 141 thinking for reader! 😭

But meanwhile my brain farted a new idea:

What if reader is new on the base, not a soldier (maybe an assistant or so) who is literally smart enough to do her job but not smart enough for life? Hyper feminine, always dressed in pink with make up on point and heels click clacking on the hallway.

141 literally are foaming at the mouth for the doll, who is oblivious to their flirt until they take the matter in their own hands and show her just how good they are?

mmm im thinking semi-bimbo!reader??

they're so surprised when they see her on her first day off, all ditzy as she tries to figure out something so easy - like she's trying to turn on tv while full on not realising it's not plugged in? she goes to price for help, who just happens to have the boys with him; and of course all of them come along because they wanna impress the pretty little thing by helping her.

they're all stunned when they figure it out, but their cocks get so painfully hard when she looks at them like a confused puppy when they tell her why it wouldn't work.

and it happens constantly when you're off the clock, they notice it more and more. they wonder how someone that competent and smart can be so,,,, stupid?? it makes them wanna take care of you, pamper and dote on you, but God, each of them would love for you to look up at them with that confused, empty headed look while fuckinh your useless brain out.