#hurricane go brrrrr

[the-names-quinn]

I think I'ma preemptively cancel tomorrow's Sidequest Sunday cause I'm a little caught up with surviving in general rn. Don't worry WE WIN THESE! <3

[turbolainen]

that's a wrap / may 25 2021

[percabethforlife]

god i hate to be the one to say this but félix, agustín, and bruno makes my daddy issues go BRRRRR like LORD THEY'RE SUCH GOOD PEOPLE

Like the fact that maribel after getting caught immediately spills everything to her dad bcs she trusts him enough to not judge her for doing something arguably stupid. And agustín running after luisa when he knows she's having a mental breakdown. Standing up to abuela because his daughter comes first, even little things like cheering the loudest for antonio after the gift ceremony. He means well, that's literally his descriptor.

Félix is always so supportive to his kids, he never invalidates pepa's emotions, never says things like "calm down" like abuela did but only focuses in the outcome and trying to fix it like shooing away the clouds or pulling her away sk she doesnt get antonio wet. the smallest things like knowing camillo enough to know that he's not dolores when he was getting food when maribel (who's also lived with them their entire lives) easily made that mistake. Still super joyous even though he got married in a hurricane.

WHERE DO I BEGIN WITH BRUNO GOOD LORD. TEN YEARS. Do you know how easy it is to grow bitter and spiteful towards people who don't care about you? He spent ten years listening to people actively avoiding to discuss him with only bad reputation to carry his name but he's still full of love and stayed in the walls because HE loves THEM. And the fact that he did it for mirabel. He's garnered a bad reputation his whole life but when it comes to his 5 year old niece potentially being flagged as the black sheep, as the destroyer, he left, no questions. and he fixed the cracks from behind the walls :'((

THEYRE JUST SO GOD THE STANDARDS ARE NO LONGER IN HELL

[1wet-teabag]

how types of weather make me feel-

snow:

snow makes me feel like i have a bubble. a very large, thick, bubble around me that travels with me where i go in the world. it feels isolating and heavy. that can be good for mental health at forst, but i become so mesmerized (literally laying in bed and watching my window for hours) that i sinply do not gst on my phone, read, leave my room, or talk to others at all for days on end. It stimulates my thoughts and makes me think more than i may prefer sometimes. It is not good weather for clearing my head, and sometimes disorients me so i overthink. Can cause stress when i have 3+ days with snow encapsulated.

rain-

rain cleanses. it washes away all thoughts, literally. i cannot think in full senescences when i hear rain. brain go brrrrr. vv nice. my fav weather, ESPECIALLY WHEN ACCOMPANIED BY FOG. shit fucks me up in the best way possible. I want to walk in the rain, i open my windows and stare into the woods behind my house. i feel my chest stop releasing worries and thoughts. It has a numbing effect, like a nice and gentle drug. The smell- my favorite scent. (thanks plants)

fog-

eerie. interesting. can cause anxiety if i am on the road. I like walking in the fog at night. Night fog is the best, especially in a feild. I wear crocs and no socks. I like to have wet feet when fog is settled. The grass sounds nice under ny shoes. I want to lay down, but I will not allow anything above my ankles to go past damp. Fog is an enemy and friend. I hear a car and I get nervous. I am alone and i revel in the silence. Like a calm but wild animal, you can't tell when a problem will arise. It is blinding, but it cradles you so you feel safe, like being in your head. Too in your head.

Sunny, hot-

death, kill me, i hate it, it hates me. The sun and I have a nasty relationship. I want to yell at him and shake my fist, but i know he will not answer. He shines, only doing his job, and I scowl, waiting for the night, when his reflection can bathe me. I avoid going out, but I try to ignore him when we must unite: everyone I know is a sun person. He is loud, but gentle, and I am only angry at his presence.

Sunny, cold/cool-

Safety is written on the particles in the air. The dance and sing and my mind hums the tune. It makes me want to wiggle. Walking on a sunny day in a crew neck allows me to forget my ailments, until my nose gets cold. Then I remember- it is still cold. Fall is the best time for this. I can wear thinner sweaters and thicker shirts and feel in my element. Autumn is my favorite season. Sometimes this happens in spring. It is upsetting then, because I want it to be warmer but i hate summer. Fall is the perfect balance between summer and winter, spring is a polar line. it IS summer or it IS winter.

Storms- thunder, snow, hail.

Odd. As if the world is much larger than it is. It brings me into perspective of everything. Mainly the idea that it can be storming at my house, but drive five minutes and it is clear as the day is long. Makes me think of the clouds causing the storm. They are very high up, and that storm is coming very fast downwards. All the effort from that could to build up the precipitation, and sometimes send it FARTHER up to make little ice balls, just for it to smother itself and dissipate when it decides it's done. and like i said, even as large as the coulds can be, they are onky a small, ever so small portion of the world. You think land storms are bad? Try ocean storms. That keeps me up at night, the idea of being on a boat in the middle of the coean in the eye of a hurricane. It will not remain. I will not remain. Perhaps the storms are there to remind us of mortality, or maybe natural selection. They have no voice, and if they did, they would not speak. They use all their might and thrash at the world. They are me. They are no one. They are everyone.

Windy-

When I am hit by a strong gust of wind, no matter the temperature, it reminds me that I have a body. I can feel, and I have skin. I have muscles and bones and thoughts and will. I have renditions of reality in ny head that only I can live with. It makes me, tells me, whispers that even if i am insane or loosing myself, I will go on. My body will continue to function and grow even when ny mind is not properly there to guide it. In my most ragged and low moments, the wind swoops in to smack me. It straightens my spine and says "The world will move on. Will you move with it?" And I march home with new determination. The wind is a great relative that you meet only at annual family gatherings, that lives alone and everyone forgets about until theg bash in the door to place new wisdom in every attendee. I am grateful for the wind.

Moonlight-

peace. Nighttime is the definition of peace. I feel my bones relax from their daily rattles. I feel my mucles pull me to a place where I can look at the moon and know I will make it anofher day. The moon represents many things. She sings every night that she shines, opera echoing though the world. The new moons are like sitting facing the stage. You hear her words, her breaths and endings, but she is behind the curtain. Or so you think. You cannot see her. She could be right in feont of you and you would never notice. She is versatile and has much range. I have heard her song a hundred times but it remains as beautiful as when I first learned to listen for it.

[icarus-suraki]

The incoming hurricane is the only autumnal thing going around here

This Fucking Website: It’s September! So it’s ~AUTUMN~ now! Pumpkins! Sweaters! Cold rain! Blankets! Apple picking! Fog! Hot coffee! Brrrrr it’s so chilly!

Me: It’s fucking pushing 90 degrees F outside and I’m sitting here listening to cicadas buzzing and while thunderstorms start building up. It’s still summer.

[existentialdruid]

😂🌀

Ha ha, hurricane go brrrrr

ur first and last recent emojis are ur gender now. mine is 🅱👨‍❤‍💋‍👨

[havvki]

ehehehe hurricane go brrrrr

[sy-maya]

Passage to New Zealand and next steps

Stats until now: sailing for 3.5 years, 18′130 nautical miles (33′580 km)

Family and friends ask us about our next steps. What next? Where do we go? What will we do? How long still? The short and the long answer is: We don’t know yet. But we’ll let you know as soon as we figure it out. In the next days, we have to do some repairs on Maya, haul her out, organize all that. Herbert has to catch up with work (Shortcut). Then, we’d like to do some sight seeing with the kiddos (Christmas?), etc. After that, we will see… Stay tuned! ;-)

In the meantime, here is our passage to NZ day by day. Thanks to our dear friend Grégoire Meylan for posting these in out FB page and thank you all for your motivating comments!

Some impressions can be found here: FB Album NZ Passage 

—————————————–

Day 1: Between Storm and Hurricane November 16-17, 2017

We left Tongatapu yesterday at noon and had a smooth start. Our friends Peter and Renate from the German boat SY Mardos left 2 hours ahead. Cool to have a sailing buddy. Even if we don’t see them, it’s good to know that there is somebody close by. We were analyzing the weather together for weeks, making Excel sheets and weighting different options (the good old German/Swiss way). A bit of background information. This passage is probably the most tricky/dangerous one we ever made. Until now we were stable trade-wind sailors, but down here, the weather changes from one hour to the other. Predictions are very unreliable e.g. now we should have 10 knots wind. In fact we have 20 knots. This is a 100% error :-/. At least the direction is correct. Also, there are weekly spring storms raging on the north coast of New Zealand (up to 30S). There is one right now with wind speeds of a predicted 50 knots. This means gusts up to 60-70 knots in reality. Not good. In comparison, you can imagine holding your head out of the car window at 140km/h. Now imagine it is your entire home that is looking out of that car window and on top of the street rushes 8-9m waves. We don’t want that and that’s the reason why we did not leave last time we planned to. We might have just passed before that storm, but any problem with the engine at the wrong moment could happen and boooom. We are so happy though, that our friends from SY Carapitanga and SY MeliMela just made it on time this morning! The weather window we are taking right now looks much better, at least for now. Weather might still change and will change. Second reason why this is a tricky passage are the hurricanes in the South Pacific. The season started November 1st. Even if there are no reported hurricanes before December 1st in Tonga, we do not want to risk to stay too long. Hurricanes are also very unpredictable constructs. There are outliers in every season. We checked before leaving and there is no hurricane in sight down here. We are right between storm and hurricane. Good that we get weather on board and have daily radio rounds with our friends here. Thanks HAM radio.

Due to the tricky weather here, some of our friend sailors (actually most of them) rely on the help of some weather guru. We don’t. He sent about 16 boats to New Zealand at the wrong time. They were all stuck at Minerva, a reef in the middle of the ocean, for almost 2 weeks in order to take a very risky weather window (the one we decided to avoid). We hope they all arrived safe and sound in New Zealand. But of course, at the end, everyone is free to do what they want, but we prefer to listen to our guts and blame only ourselves if something goes wrong.

Initially, we wanted to see Minerva, a reef about 2 days SW from Tonga in the middle of the ocean. However, the current wind direction below 30S does not allow for a visit (reminds us when we wanted to see Coco Island from Costa Rica to Galapagos and the wind was blowing from the wrong direction. History is repeating). We never made it there. Most ‘experts’ say to go west and then south to catch the west winds after 30S. Currently, the wind blows from E down there and this already since weeks. A change in the wind pattern cannot be seen. Therefore, we go South, until the SE wind comes in. Completely against all sailing literature. (BTW, there are tens of boats waiting in Fiji and New Caledonia already for weeks to cross, but they have the wind right against, and Hurricanes in the back).

Hope our guts will be right and we will make it safe and sound. So far so good.

Fun fact: By going south, we crossed the political time zone again to yesterday and will cross it once more in a couple of days to tomorrow. Don’t ask what day it is here :-)

We had Chili con Carne for lunch&dinner.

position at 9pm UTC+/-??? https://waypoint.li/map?q=-24.872,-175.0814

—————————————–

Day 2: Active volcanos and pitted dates. November 17-18, 2017

We’re still heading straight south to catch the wind. The night was calm and nice. This morning, we started the engine to keep up the speed. At least, we listen to one of the sailor golden rules for the NZ crossing: DO NOT SPARE THE FUEL, KEEP UP THE SPEED WITH OR WITHOUT WIND! ;-) But still, we fly reef III on the main sail, safety first! We’ve sailed 360 NM, and there are 7xx NM more to go. Our average speed is 6.3kn. It was a lovely day, with smooth (motor)sailing. Even the sun decided to show up at the late afternoon, just in time to give us a wonderful sunset. So far so good.

The boys are fine, very energetic and challenging :-) They are quite excited by the surrounding sea trenches (more than 10km deep) and volcanic activities. We showed them on the map how we are crossing a geologically interesting (and scaring) active underwater area. So, instead of watching for dolphins or whales, they are fantasizing about eventual volcanos “Did you see that? I spotted some smoke, it is definitely a volcano!”.

We had yummy butternut Tortelloni for lunch and a chocolate-banana-dates-sesame cake for dessert. We’re trying to use all the “forbidden” items before coming to NZ. No fresh food, no dairy, no seeds, no lentils, etc. They have a very strict list in order to preserve their beautiful islands. The main question among sailors before leaving Tonga was “Do you need by any chance some lentils?”. It became a running gag ;-) For the story, our friends Meri&Manu from SY Carapitanga/Paprika, gave us a big bag of dates before heading to NZ. Asma was very happy and proud to find out that they were actually from Tunisia! Yeaaaah! The bag is almost empty now ;-) Position at 9pm UTC+/-??? https://waypoint.li/map?q=-26.732,-175.21

—————————————–

Day 3: South, More South, Most South November 18-19, 2017

Again nice sailing, smooth conditions. The weather forecast seems to be reliable and stable. We are very grateful, so far so good. After sailing straight south since we left Tonga, today we switched to bearing Whangarei, NZ. 480NM behind us, and still 655 NM to go. We crossed this afternoon the 28S longitude, we have never been so far South. The most South we got was Pitcairn Islands (25S) in September 2016, when we first crossed the Pacific from Galapagos. We are all excited about it :-) Small things in sailing life. The air temperature is still nice here, and we are enjoying every bit of it, because our friends on the radio are complaining about the ice cold NZ! Brrrrr. We had a butternut soup for lunch. Soup leftovers and pop corn for dinner ;-). Yummy.

Position at 9pm UTC-11 (we figured it out, officially, it’s Sat 18th here until we cross the date line again.) https://waypoint.li/map?q=-28.603,-176.418

—————————————–

Day 4: Half distance November 19-20, 2017

While writing these lines, we are only a few miles away from half the distance to Whangarei - New Zealand. Today, nothing spectacular but the sunrise, the sunset, the starry sky, and a splendid day of sailing. We read a lot to the kids. Adam is in Harry Potter fever and Herbert got addicted too (again). So he finished the remaining three chapters of the second book. Adam was so impressed that Asma had to tell him a lot of bedtime stories to get his mind off the scary passages. Samy didn’t understand all the details - better for his sleep quality. ;-)

Position: https://waypoint.li/map?q=-30.00,-177.04

—————————————–

Day 5: Wind of Change ;-) November 20-21, 2017

After a quiet night, the wind is turning to the right side (From S to SE). Exactly as forecasted. The bearing is 230, straight to Whangarei NZ. Still 440NM to go. We’re passing the Kermadec Ridge right at this moment. Quite rough seas with gusts up to 30 knots (“Dream conditions” for Herbert, “Not So” for Asma but OK, the boys are sleeping). Quite impressive to be in these surroundings. Volcanos -new and old-, marine reserves, birds everywhere. We even spotted our first Albatross, which was following us for more than an hour. Amazing beast! Herbert somehow managed to injure his left hand. It got infected and quite swollen, which led to fever and weakness. Trying to fix him with antibiotic ointment. Last green lentils, carrots and potatoes stew for lunch&dinner.

Position: https://waypoint.li/map?q=-31.072,-178.917

—————————————–

Day 6: 180 West or 180 East? November 21-22, 2017

The day started with a celebration: we crossed the 180W/E longitude line (and therefore the date line once again)! We have officially circumnavigated half the globe. Our last watermelon has been opened for the occasion ;-). The sailing has been quite bumpy, according to Asma, who is more than looking forward to its direction changing easterly so that we have the wind more from the stern! Herbert and the boys, of course, find it very cool. Maya is rocking, and after all it’s much more fun to play with toy cars when the floor of the living room is inclined by 30 degrees. There are not many houses like this out there. Adam had the ingenious idea to build a sleigh with our IKEA plates. It worked fine and it didn’t take long until the first plate broke… Because of these conditions, only leftovers for lunch (lentils yet again) and some crackers and pop corn for dinner. No way to cook! Even washing the dishes or moving from A to B reveals to be very sporty and to be carefully planned for. The good thing is that we could spot our buddy SV MARDOS since yesterday night and still now, we are about 3NM apart and could talk on the VHF radio! Funny! Herbert’s injury is not getting better, therefore we switched to antibiotics. The wound looks like a volcano by now! He feels a little better, though. Some readers might wonder what we are doing during our night watches when outside it’s freezing and the waves transform Maya into a roller coaster. Asma is watching Big Bang Theory and Herbert - officially on holiday - is (as a hobby) helping a Swiss startup implementing some features for their iPhone app. What a nerdy family ;o) Still 294NM to go. Good night! Position: https://waypoint.li/map?q=-32.60,178.73

—————————————–

Day 7: Last night? November 22-23, 2017

After a rocky night, we had a very nice and smooth sailing day. Sun, no waves, perfect wind (Herbert: boring ;-) ). Well, the temperature is getting lower and lower (air at 20 and water at 18 degrees), and we adapt our layers of clothing, so it goes from 0 (only underwear) to 1 (t-shirt for Herbert) or 2 layers (fleece jacket and thick socks for Asma). The boys start with more layers after waking up, but end up with underwear after a few hours. Maya is well isolated, so we only notice the cold when we go outside, which happens less and less by the way… Bye bye tropics :-(

Still, we are all excited for the next chapter of our family journey. We have been sailing one week from Tonga, and it is - most probably - our last night at sea for a long time. Asma was very busy emptying the provisions, so there was much more cooking than yesterday: a bread with (last) whole grain flour and (last) seeds for breakfast, Gnocchis with (last) fresh tomatoes for lunch, a cake with (last) eggs, and (last) hazelnuts and (last) dates for the snack; and finally (last) sausages for dinner. For the New Zealand immigration, we have to get rid of all food items before arriving, and give a list of all “risk goods”. Herbert has been filling these forms. He could even call the officials on the maritime radio via SSB, to inform them of our soon arrival. His hand is getting better, but still a bit weak. The antibiotics are doing their job.

1042 NM behind us and less than 140NM to go until the customs berth in Marsden Cove marina, Whangarei NZ.

Position: https://waypoint.li/map?q=-34.268,176.459

—————————————–

Day 8: Arrival November 23-24, 2017

At midnight, Herbert woke Asma up for her shift with a “We have a problem, the wind is gone, and the temporary autopilot doesn’t want to work, argh!”. Asma put on 5 layers of clothes and went outside to steer by hand. Herbert tried and tried to fix the problem without success, so he eventually went to sleep until his next shift. Asma was actually very happy to be steering outside despite the cold. It was our last night sailing (well at least for a while ;-)), so we fully enjoyed the starry sky and the peacefulness of the night. It gave us the opportunity to think about all this amazing journey.

At 6:30am, the kids woke up, put warm clothes on and went outside with Asma. Adam could steer, while she prepared their breakfast. He was so proud to help :-) At 10am, Herbert woke up and started to fix the autopilot again. Debugging. At 11am, it was working! Yesss, now, no time to sleep or rest, we have to clean the boat for clearance because we want to arrive today!! And we will. We could have slowed the pace and spent another night on sea but no, we want to arrive on Friday, as planned ;-)

Maya was grateful to be cared of and to be clean and neat. Even the boys were like “Ah wow, Maya looks nice like this!”. And both of us thought ”THAT’S THE WAY SHE WOULD BE IF YOU KIDS WOULDN’T MAKE A MESS ALL THE TIME”, but we didn’t say it. We’ve just asked them to keep her like this at least until the customs come in next day, otherwise they wouldn’t let us stay in New Zealand. Hihihi develish parents, but it worked :-) For lunch, we had some precooked French delicatessen: Boeuf Bourguignon and Ratatouille :-)

At 5pm, the boys were screaming “Land in Sight! We see New Zealand!”. So cool. We will make it. They went to bed to sleep a little bit in order to be fit when we arrive late. That’s what Samy did, except that he never woke up until next morning ;-) Adam was so excited, he couldn’t stay still for 1s, so we let him stay awake with us, and enjoy the breathtaking scenery outside. For dinner, Herbert, who was still in the mood of French cuisine, and who didn’t want to throw away all onions and garlic, cooked a wonderful onion soup. Yummy!

By 8:30pm, Adam was getting tired and overexcited. He could only calm down and sleep when Herbert laid with him in bed and promised to wake him up when we arrive. Which we actually did, but he was so tired, he just fell back asleep ;-) Herbert took radio contact with the NZ harbor to announce our arrival. It was getting dark, we were tired but also excited, that instead of taking shifts to rest, we just sat together outside to steer and enjoy our last miles under a new moon, clear sky, shooting stars, flat sea, and welcoming land lights. It was very emotional. We are really here. We did it. Amazing.

The harbor entry was quite tricky at night, we were so happy to have the navigation charts. It all went well with a huge amount of Adrenalin. At 11:15pm, we were safely docked at the customs’ berth at Marsden Cove Marina. Exhausted but overwhelmed by gratefulness.

Good night from New Zealand!

Position: https://waypoint.li/map?q=-35.8367,174.4686

—————————————–

Day 9: Ship capsized and sank November 24-25, 2017

At 6:30am, the boys woke up and cheered “WE ARE IN NEW ZEALAND!!!”. No way to sleep any longer :-). We woke up, took our breakfast, and cleared up. At 8:20am, the immigration officer arrived, followed later by the quarantine one. This latter was Mike Barker, the guy we met in Vava’u during the “Blue Water Festival” (Corresponding blogpost still to come), and who we asked all about food clearance in NZ. Nice to see a familiar face at arrival. It went all well, and at 9:20am, we were officially cleared in! We learned from the custom officials that two ships didn’t make the trip. One ship has to be abandoned, the other sank. The crew, however, could be saved in both cases. We were shocked. This happened exactly in the weather window we wanted to take first, but finally didn’t take (see one of the FB posts). Lesson learned: wait, wait, wait, until weather is stable.

It’s amazing how the clearance procedure in New Zealand is dramatized. Adjectives such as difficult, expensive, impossible, tedious, long, etc. are often used to describe it. People start preparing already months before arrival. The truth is: It is very easy to clear in to New Zealand. The assistance of the officials is unbelievable and it takes no longer than 15 minutes to get cleared. This is about 4 times faster than Tonga for example. Not to mention the countries in Latin America. There is not much paper work to be done and it doesn’t cost a cent. Well, that is OUR experience, may be, we were indeed very well prepared ;-)

After clearance, we moved straight to our berth B52 (what a great berth name ;-) ). At 10am, we left the boat and went exploring the marina.

The Marsden Cove Marina is outside of Whangarei, the main city here. There is not much. Therefore, it took us quite some time to get decent Internet to write these posts.

By the way, Herbert’s hand is getting better. He hasn’t been to a doctor yet (everything is closed), but first thing on Monday.

The little we saw so far - the meadows, the woods, the cows, etc. - reminds us of Switzerland. Well, there are some palm trees, but otherwise, really similar. On top of that, everything is so clean. What also hit us was that everybody is so white. Really white skin. Or pale? ;-) The ‘small’ supermarket has everything one can imagine (well, at least for us) we bought fresh vegetables (Broccoli, which we missed most during our trip), fruits (KIWIS ;-), strawberries and blueberries), some meat, CHEESE :-))) to prepare a nice dinner. On Maya, the meat already marinated, and the veggies chopped, we fired up the stove. At least, we wanted to fire it up. However, it didn’t work. Gas was empty. Wow, how lucky are we. If this would have happened some days or hours earlier… Anyway, what now? It’s late Saturday afternoon. When do the stores close here? Let’s ask our neighbors form SY Tregoning if they can help somehow. Luckily, they had a spare gas bottle. We hooked it up and were able to start cooking. While Herbert prepared dinner, Asma went to check whether the shop was still open and had some gas. Yeah, it did. We were saved.

After dinner, we watched a movie with the kids and went all early to bed. Good night!

Position: https://waypoint.li/map?q=-35.8373,174.4685

[thebattlelost]

Tick Tock Tick Tock

Tick tock tick tock

It is three am reads the clock on

my bedroom wall with a steady

tick tock tick tock tick tock that

seems a little louder then I can

remember as I lay there in bed

all alone and feeling lost without

a care if I am alive or dead tick

tock tick tock my mind is very

clouded in a thick black fog

making it very hard to think as

I find it increasingly hard to

sleep tick tock tick tock brrrrr I

shiver from the bitter cold icy

air that has come in from out

of nowhere and there is heavy

feeling of a very deep despair

that is hanging in the room

lingering in the air like a under

lit smoky bar at three am

closing time tick tock tick

tock tick tock that is pressing

down on my chest like a pair

of vice grips then terror comes

over me as realize I am all alone

and unable to move paralyzed

tick tock tick tock tick tock as

I think to myself stop breath

calm down is this real or am I

only having a bad dream or

maybe nightmare yes that is it

it must be as I glance up at the

clock three zero one am wait

as I try to shake my head that

cannot be right what is going

on how can it be, then the

invisible pressure feels as if

it's being squeezed even harder

still making it almost impossible

to take a breath so I cannot even

breathe as I start to black out

so I try to scream but only

silence as I mouth the words

"why me" tick tock tick

tock tick tock tick tock I open

my eyes look up at the clock it

reads three zero two am I lay

there while I listen to a silence

that is so loud that the clock

starts to echo in my head tick

tick tock tock tick tick tock tock

again I try to move but cannot

as the room seems to be

getting darker then before all I

can see is the shadows over

me cast by the light of the clock

but wait by the what I squint to

see a bit clearer tick tick tick

tick tock tock tock the heavy

saturated stench of sorrow and

regret fills my nostrils making

me vomit on my chest as the

heavy smoke seems to get

thicker and this fog that has

been clouding my mind starts

to lift as one the shadows yes

one of the shadows is staring

right at me just staring with

blank look then screams so I

close my eyes try to remember

a better time but none come

and all hear is the sound of

silence and the clock getting

louder and louder becoming

unbearable booming everything

is spinning like I am falling

uncontrollably TICK TICK

TICK TICK TOCK TOCK TOCK

TOCK then nothing at all but

the quite sounds of teardrops

falling to the ground and

someone sobbing in the

distance as I feel a wetness

from my cheeks and I know

that it is coming from me

somewhere deep down inside

as feel the sheer loneliness

start to overtake me and pain

oh God the pain coming from

a broken heart as waves of guilt

come crashing down upon

me like an angry sea in a

hurricane feeling as if I am

being tossed around then

slammed down on the ground

yet cannot move the sobbing

from so hard that it is moving

me from within my own self

then in a blink of an eye there is

nothing except for the sound of

the clock on the wall tick tock

tick tock tick tock three zero

four what felt like hours was

only just minutes just as my

life feels like it will never end

please somebody help me why

can I not move or make a sound

except for my own voice in my

head like a narrator reading a

story hahahah no that is crazy

then i start to cry then laugh

what is wrong with me then as I

fall back asleep I look up tick

tock tick tick tick tick then

nothing at all..

Poet Richard M Knittle Jr.

A #Poets Journey

[leonidadoherty-blog]

Hurricane Irma Results In 'Serious Harm' To UK Caribbean Islands Video Clip.

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