#hurray for fly women

[plaguedoves]

(Tap for better quality)

They are having a lovely innocent time idk what youre talking about

[theemissuniverse]

“IMPENDING DOOM” SHAO KAHN X FEM!READER

SUMMARY : You are an Earthrealm warrior. Shao Kahn challenges you. He will stop his attack on Earthrealm if you win the fight against him. If you do not, you will marry him and become his bride. (Spoiler alert, ya dumbass loses) also plot change, you save Kung Lao at the tournament so bro doesn’t die. Hurray for you! (This is also one of my favorite things I wrote and idk why)

A/N : Also Shao Kahn >>> General Shao. But also side note HOW DID KUNG LAO DIE IN MK 9 LIKE DID THEY NOT SEE SHAO KAHN WALKING UP BEHIND BRO????

A/N : Also on the note, I feel like in my personal opinion, y’all characterize Shao Kahn wrong. I feel like if Shao Kahn were to have a lover, he’d actually be more gentle with them and treat them like a goddess. Just because he’s a bad guy doesn’t mean he doesn’t have a soft spot. Like he has one for Sindel, Mileena and Skarlet so I would just assume he would have one for his lover

A/N : Also ALSO this is written more so like for the reader to be curvy/chubby but you can imagine her not being that way if you please

WARNINGS : (MDNI)! f receiving, breeding kink, slight dirty talk, some praise, unsafe p in v, insecurities

Here’s part 2

MASTERLIST

You couldn’t stand him. He was so smug about the whole ordeal. The truth was you didn’t know if you guys would win. Johnny was already down so now that was one less warrior.

Liu Kang went to try and free Kitana. You just stood there and impatiently watched the scene.

Shao Kahn however couldn’t keep his eyes off of you. He had met you previously and became rather obsessed with you. He claimed you would be his soon enough. He would stand by that claim too.

Kung Lao had defeated both Shang Tsung and Quan Chi. It had been surprising. Sure, Kung Lao was an excellent fighter but those two were excellent sorcerers.

That’s when you saw it. Shao Kahn walking up behind him. “No!” You were the closest one to him. You immediately grabbed Kung Lao and switched him over to behind you. You then kicked Shao Kahn with your flying kick so hard that it knocked him down.

Gasps were heard. At this point, Liu Kang had freed Kitana. You went over and helped Kung Lao up. “He was going to kill you.” You informed him.

Liu Kang helped Kung Lao up a little and brought him closer to him and Kitana. You looked at Shao Kahn, awaiting for his reaction.

He does not react the way you expect him to. A low dark chuckle erupts from his throat. He is amused.

Shao Kahn stands up from the ground. You can see the intimidating look he gave behind his mask. “I like women that have fire.”

You rolled your eyes slightly. Shao Kahn had been trying to use his advances on you since he had met you and of course, none of it worked. “You’re done, Shao Kahn. You’re just mad that Kung Lao best you. Don’t be a poor sport about it.”

“Poor sport? Care to make this interesting?”

“What are you going on about?”

Shao Kahn started to circle you and by instinct, you circled with him. He stared you down from your head to your toes. “Fight me. If you can best me, I will attack Earthrealm no longer.”

You were surprised. He would stop attacking Earthrealm just like that? What you didn’t understand was why he was willing to take that kind of risk. You may be no Liu Kang but you were one of Earthrealm’s top defenders. The best female fighter.

“Just like that?” You questioned not believing the tyrant.

“Just like that.” He confirmed with you.

You looked him up and down, trying to figure him out. “That doesn’t make any sense. You’re already trying to conquer Earthrealm. So what more do you want? What do you want if I were to lose?”

Shao Kahn had a deep chuckle at that question. He was waiting for you to ask him that. “It’s very simple. You will marry me and become my Empress. I need a strong, well put together woman and you are exactly what I’ve been looking for.”

You actually couldn’t believe it. You would have to marry Shao Kahn if you lost? You stopped circling around him and Shao Kahn stopped as well. You were too shocked to speak.

You found your voice though and shook your head. “Fuck you.” You were about to walk away but the sound of his voice made you stop dead in your tracks.

“Afraid you’ll lose? That’s hilarious. You’re one of Earthrealm’s strongest fighters and even you believe you cannot best me? Pathetic.”

You absolutely hated him because he knew how to push your buttons. You turned back around to face him. It was like you were almost accepting his challenge.

Liu Kang looked between the two of you before walking over to you. He rested a hand on your shoulder. “(Y/N). Do not. He is not to be trusted. Even if you do win, he most likely will not keep his end of the deal.”

“I am a man of my word, Earthrealmer.” Shao Kahn stated as if he was almost offended Liu Kang would even suggest that. “Come on, (Y/N). I say it’s a win win. Saving Earthrealm or marrying me? What could be better than that.”

You scoffed at his cockiness. You turned your attention to Raiden, seeing if he approved with what you were about to do. Raiden seemed unsure but he nodded for you to do whatever you had to do.

Turning your attention back on Shao Kahn, you took some steps forward. “You gonna buy me a pony if I win?” You couldn’t help but sarcastically say.

Shao Kahn chuckled. Oh, did he love your nature. You had a lot of bark for someone that was an Earthrealmer. That’s what intrigued him so much. “Oh, I will give you more than you can imagine.”

You rolled your eyes slightly but did not say anything. You took your fighting stance and Shao took his.

Instantly, you started with offense. You punched, kicked, and continued this pattern and Shao blocked every hit you tried to connect.

You were very confused because Shao did not try to be offensive with you. He was on defense. This pattern continued for some time until you gave him a great big push.

When you did so, he did not react to it. You tilted your head at him. “Why are you going easy on me?”

“I prefer my Empress to not be so bruised up.”

That’s when Shao started to turn into offensive mode and you were on your defense. He swung his hammer at you about a thousand times and you ducked every hit.

Shao Kahn punched you in the gut and then kicked you in the stomach. You fell down on your back.

You felt the wind get knocked from you. You had to regain your composure quickly. You moved to the right when he tried to stomp you while you were on the ground. Then you swept his feet and he had fallen on the ground.

Shao Kahn groaned in pain. You smirked to him. Shao did not give up easily in the slightest. The Emperor got up and charged at you.

You ducked every hit that tried to come in contact with you. Every blow he tried to throw it did not connect. Until one of the eventually did.

His right fist connected with your face. You fell to the ground instantly.

Shao Kahn felt slightly bad. Your lip was bleeding and it looked pretty bad but he could not show it. You felt your lip as blood leaked onto your white shirt.

You got up and stood your ground. He was impressed to be completely honest. Most female Earthrealm warriors would’ve cried or backed out by now. Not you. That’s why he liked you so much.

You went to kick at his stomach but Shao moved out the way. He went to hit you in your chest but you blocked his movement. Finally, you landed an uppercut and it made Shao Kahn stumble back a bit. This time Shao was bleeding a little.

Shao felt his nose and nothing but a smirk came on his lips when he saw the blood trickle down his finger. It was your turn to be surprised. You knew he was sadistic but you did not know he would enjoy you hurting him.

With you being distracted, Shao hit you in the chest with his left fist and then kicked you in your stomach, making you fall to your knees.

Shao backhanded you and you fell to the ground. You groaned in pain. Usually Shao would kick his enemies while they were down but he would not do that with you.

He picked you up by the shirt and saw your weakened condition. “Say it.”

You didn’t want to but he was stronger than you. You felt as though you failed everyone. You could not believe that he had actually beat you.

You were too weak to go on and everyone knew that after seeing the fight. You signed some and made sure not to look at him in his eyes. “I concede.”

Shao Kahn smirked. He helped you to your feet and helped you stand properly. Shao wiped the blood that was leaking from your mouth.

The blood was on his fingers. Shao Kahn placed the fingers in his mouth and sucked the blood off. You looked at him a bit disgusted by his action.

“The tournament will be paused.” Shao Kahn told the Earthrealmers. “I have a bride that needs to get ready.”

You tried to hold back your eye roll. Shao Kahn made Quan Chi open up a portal and Shao Kahn made you come through it with him.

Shao Kahn had some business to attend to before handling you so you were sent to his room. You actually could not believe how big his room was.

You walked further into the room. The bed was the biggest thing about the room. He had a full wardrobe, a big shower and bath and big windows.

The room was dark. Not in the lighting sense but the color. It was red and black. You were not surprised by this in the slightest.

A knock was on the door. You didn’t know if you should even say ‘come in’ because well this was just now your room. “Come in?” You questioned more so then said.

A woman that had looked just like Kitana but had tarkatan features entered your room with clothes. “Father, said to give you these.”

You had realized that this was Mileena. You carefully took the clothes out of her hands. “Thanks.”

“I’m so excited! I will have a mother finally! Father, says you are a strong woman. I don’t quite see it but I believe in his intuition.”

You didn’t know if you should’ve been offended or not. You also felt a little bad. Usually, you had a pretty good tell if people were evil but Mileena didn’t really seem like she was evil to you. “Your father is an annoying tyrant and I cannot stand him.”

Mileena laughed a little. You had to admit, it was a bit unsettling. “Father said you would say something like that. We’ll be a family shortly, dear. Do not worry.”

That bad feeling came back to you. Mileena seemed to be desperate to have a family and you could understand that. From what you were told, she was Shang Tsung’s experiment so she most likely did not have a sense of identity. “Hopefully I don’t claw my eyes out in the process.”

“I’ll let you get changed.” Mileena left the room, leaving you there.

You changed into the outfit. It was a long fitted red gown with lace attached to the back. The problem was that it showed off your stomach and you were a little bit on the chubbier and curvier side.

You sighed a little then looked down to realize that your thighs also did the same thing. The clothing wasn’t too revealing. (Surprisingly for Shao Kahn’s taste) but it was revealing in all the places you did not want it revealed.

The door opened and closed. You turned to look to see Shao Kahn had stepped in. He was about to say something but he stopped in his tracks when he saw you.

You were the most gorgeous woman in all of Outworld to him. Hell, even in all the universe. He mentally thanked himself that he put you in that outfit because god, to him, it was doing you a lot of good.

“You look breath taking, My Empress.”

You rolled your eyes and turned back to the mirror. “Cut the shit.” You told him and he laughed. “What is so funny?”

“Your Earthrealm language is amusing.”

“I’ll show you amusing.” You more so mumbled under your breath. Shao Kahn heard you but he chose not to say anything.

Shao Kahn had placed his things on the table next to you. When he did, he saw you staring at yourself in the mirror. He noticed the looks you were giving yourself. “Stop looking at yourself like that.”

You didn’t bother to look at Shao Kahn. You kept your eyes glued to the mirror. “Like what?”

“Like you don’t appreciate what you are seeing.”

You didn’t respond to him. You continued to stare at yourself in the mirror, trying to convince yourself that the outfit looked good on you. You couldn’t get with it. “It doesn’t flatter me.” You told him truthfully.

Shao Kahn did not understand what you meant. “What do you mean?”

You gave him a look like he should know. You pointed to your stomach that was sticking out. “Do you not see this? I look like I’m pregnant.”

Don’t play into that because the thought of getting you pregnant drove Shao Kahn crazy. Shao Kahn stood behind you. He grabbed onto your stomach and gave it soft rubs despite his hands being so large and rough. “This is a body of a woman.”

Shao was in love with your curvy body. With all parts about you. Your stomach, your thighs, and definitely your ass. He was obsessed with every part of you.

You were surprised at how good his hands felt on your body. You wanted to fight it but you had given into his rough touches.

Shao Kahn started to rub all over your body and massage you. Your back, your neck, your stomach, your arms. He was rubbing everywhere he could rub. “This is a body of my Empress. I would not have you any other way.”

You were severely confused. Severely. Shao Kahn was a tyrant that only cared for his goals and his pleasure but here he was, rubbing you down, talking to you sweetly and making you feel good about yourself.

You slightly moaned at his touches. His hands felt like the Elder Gods themselves. You didn’t want the feeling of his hands all over you to stop.

But you had to snap yourself out of it. You hated this man. He ruined you. He was taking over Earthrealm as he was doing all this for you.

Shao Kahn was not a good man.

You broke out of his hold and pushed him back. “For the record, I did not enjoy that. I am just touched starved.”

He chuckled a little at your statement. He knew you liked it but he would play along into your bit for now. “Touch starved? When was the last time a man touched you like that?”

It felt like never to be honest. “None of your business. Now give me my space.” You were again, surprised that Shao Kahn had listened.

You touched the veil that went over your hair and it was long, down to your back and to the back of your legs.

“That Earthrealmer seems fond of you.” Shao said, breaking the silence.

You were confused as you fixed your earrings. “Who? No one is fond of me.”

“Liu Kang. I see the way he looks at you.”

You rolled your eyes a little at that but still didn’t look at him. “He’s just my friend. He just cares about me. Not that you would know about the caring for someone department.”

Shao Kahn watched as you put your earrings on. He honestly wanted to push your buttons. He found it extremely amusing. “Soon, I will have my victory. And I’ll kill him. He will be burned by his own fire.”

The statement pissed you off to no end. You couldn’t control your temper. You turned around to face him and you slapped him across the face, hard. You almost knocked his mask off.

Shao Kahn did not show you a reaction. You were waiting to be slapped back. Waiting for him to try and maybe beat on you mercilessly.

What you didn’t know is slapping him across the face turned him on. In fact, he started to feel himself become erect.

You looked at him puzzled. “Aren’t you going to hit me back?”

“Now, why would I do that?” You didn’t respond to him. Shao Kahn’s hands went behind the back of your head and he fixed the veil on top of your head.

The two of you didn’t speak a word as he fixed it. You just watched him. You couldn’t believe it.

When he was done, he pulled away. “Meet me down in the dining hall for dinner.”

Shao Kahn walked out the room and closed the door. You just stood there in complete shock.

This was going to be interesting.

You decided that keeping Shao Kahn waiting wasn’t a good idea and you walked out of the room. You went downstairs all the way to where dinner was to be served.

There sat Shang Tsung, Quan Chi, Reiko, Mileena, and Reptile. You weren’t really intimidated by the sorcerers, Mileena, or Reptile but you were by Reiko because you had never met him.

They all stood from their seat and bowed to you. You gave them a look, weirded out. “What the hell are you people doing?”

“Showing respect to new Empress. Well almost Empress.” Shang Tsung stated simply.

“Ugh. Don’t remind me.” You grumbled under your breath. You were about to grab a chair and sit down but Shao Kahn’s voice stopped you.

“You do not sit there.” He motioned for you to sit on the throne that was across from him. “You sit there.”

You looked to the throne and then back to him. “You people take these Outworld politics way too far.” You said before sitting on the throne. “For the record, I still hate all of you…besides Mileena.”

Mileena giggled at this. “You will learn to enjoy our company eventually, Empress.” Quan Chi told you.

“Yeah right. I’d rather have Sub-Zero freeze me to death then-“ Your statement was cut off when a servant set food on the table. When she did, you realized the meal was consistent of all your favorite foods.

You rose your eyebrows confused that he had knew this information and you looked back at Shao Kahn. “How did you know I like this?”

“I know everything.”

You looked back at the food and then back at him. “This does not earn you brownie points.” You lied to him, pointing your finger at him.

Shao Kahn smirked, knowing you were lying to him. He watched as you began to eat. When he did so, he noticed Reiko was staring at you.

You started to notice Reiko’s stare and it was making you a little bit uncomfortable. Especially because you didn’t know him very well.

Shao Kahn looked at you then turned his attention to Reiko. “Reiko. Do you like breathing?”

Reiko looked at the Kahn a bit confused at the question since the answer was obvious. He couldn’t have an attitude though when addressing him. “Yes, Shao Kahn.”

“Then I suggest you stop staring at her before I have to put an end to that.”

It was so bizarre to you seeing Shao Kahn stick up for you but you chose to block the feeling in the pit of your stomach out and continue eating.

When you were done, you were getting ready for bed. You wore a red nightgown and fixed your head up for bed. One thing you were not looking forward to is sleeping in the same bed as Shao Kahn.

You took your earrings off and were placing them on the dresser. You heard the bathroom door open and you saw Shao Kahn walk out with a towel wrapped around himself.

You were taken aback. First of all, you had never seen Shao Kahn without his armor. You never seen his face.

His face was very masculine. All the right areas were sharp. His nose was big and pointed down. His eyes were a dark red. As red as the color of blood. His head was round but chin was pointed down. Again, he had strong masculine features.

I mean, he was a big man but you did not expect for him to be that big. His chest stood strong and some scars were around his rib cage. Probably from fighting in kombat.

He looked so…good. So, good that you felt a pool of wetness come between your legs.

‘God. I really am touch starved. There’s no way I find a psychopath dictator hot.’ You thought to yourself.

Shao Kahn walked over to the mirror to examine himself. “You’re staring.”

Of course he knew you were. You scoffed and turned away from him. “Am not.” You tried taking the necklace off your neck. “I just never seen you without your helmet.”

Shao Kahn turned to you and smirked. “Is it something you like?”

“Hardly.” You lied.

Shao noticed you struggling to get your necklace off. He walked up behind you and his hands went to your neck. You released your hold on the necklace and allowed him to do it.

You felt himself press up against you. You gasped a little. Oh, he was big. Extremely big. You probably should’ve guessed since he was a big man but you still did not expect for him to be that big.

“Don’t act like you don’t feel it.”

Ugh, you hated his cocky self. “I’ve met men who had bigger.”

Shao Kahn chuckled knowing you were lying. “Sure you have.” He took off the necklace and placed it on the desk. He grabbed a pair of boxers and placed them on him.

Reality was starting to hit you. You were actually forced to marry this tyrant. You were going to be his wife. You were going to be Empress of Outworld. You were going to be on the same side as people you once found to be your enemies.

Shao Kahn started to lay in the bed. You turned to him with your hands on your hips. “So, when do you plan to marry me? I’d like to get this over with.”

“After I win the tournament.”

“Tuh. Who says you’ll win?”

“I am Shao Kahn. Kahn of Outworld. They will taste no victory.”

Everything within you hated him. You couldn’t understand why he was doing this. Why couldn’t he just leave Earthrealm alone? “You’re such a dick, you know that? You literally invaded Edenia and claimed it to be your own. You rule Outworld with an iron fist. Is that not enough? You need to take my home too?”

Shao Kahn didn’t speak. It was like he was contemplating on what he was going to say. The tiniest part of him felt bad but at the end of the day, he was a sadistic ruler. He did not care for anything else. “This is your home now.”

You shook your head. “If this is your way of winning me over, you’re pretty shitty at it.” You told him point blank.

After you turned off all the lights, you got into bed and faced the left side which was the opposite way so you weren’t facing him.

Shao Kahn knew you were mad but you would get over it eventually. He was Kahn of Outworld. You would want him. He also knew you. He knew you craved power just like he did. You just were better at hiding it. That’s why through out your entire stay, you did not throw a fuss at him taking care of you.

He knew you liked he was taking care of you. You just didn’t want to admit it because you didn’t want to be the bad guy.

Shao Kahn grabbed the blanket and laid it on top of you. His hand instinctively went to the inner part of your thigh so he could pull you closer to him but when he did, he felt how wet you were.

You mentally cursed yourself for being so turned on earlier. Shao was at your ear. His breath made the back of your hairs stand up. “Why don’t you let me take care of that.”

Before you could say anything, Shao’s hands were already on it. He pulled your panties down slightly and placed his fingers over your clit. Then he started to rub in circles.

You let out a deep moan that you felt like you had been holding in for the longest. Shao made sure to be more gentle because he knew he was heavy handed. He didn’t need to apply that much pressure to your clit because his hands were so big.

Shao Kahn kissed your neck as you let out a string of profanities. It was far more sensitive when he was rubbing it.

He had already been hard but you felt him grow even more and you didn’t believe it was possible for him to be that big. You felt his member grow on your ass.

This was a mistake. You would regret it. Absolutely would but at the moment you didn’t care. The way he was taking care of you now gave you more than enough reason to let him keep going.

You were surprised that he wasn’t eager to fuck you. He was taking his time making sure that you got all the foreplay that you needed.

Shao stuck his fingers in your pussy and started to pump in and out of you. His fingers were big so they worked well inside you.

You moaned even louder and started to move on his fingers to feel more of him. “I will show you how an Emperor takes care of his Empress.” Shao told you.

He removed his fingers from your pussy and licked all over them. You tasted so pleasant to him that he had let out a groan at the taste.

Shao Kahn took off his boxers. Then he got up and hovered over you. He took off your underwear completely and threw it on the floor. His dick slapped against your stomach. Just looking at him above you turned you on.

He picked up your legs and dragged you down to him so your pussy was right on his dick. Then Shao entered you. He made sure to enter you very slowly, knowing how big he was.

You let out the biggest moan and threw your head back. Shao moved very slowly in you, grunting at how good your pussy clenched onto him.

He filled you completely and you didn’t know whether you loved it or hated it. You moaned each time he thrusted in you. “Faster, please.”

You didn’t need to tell him twice. Shao Kahn went faster inside of you. Usually, he would go very rough and hard but he would do something different for your guy’s first time. (Yes, he was that sure in himself that this would happen again.)

“Oh my god. Yes. Oh my god. Shao.”

“That’s right. Scream my name. Let everyone know how good I’m making you feel.”

Shao Kahn watched as your stomach jiggled with each thrust. He licked his lips and felt all over your stomach. “Mine. All mine.”

You could barely form words. It felt like everything was becoming blurry. He buried himself inside you like you were the only woman he was interested in. Like you were the only woman in the world.

“No other man can have you.” Shao told you as he fucked you. You started to pant heavily. He wrapped your legs around his waist and started to pound even harder. “You will give me children. I will bury my seed in you.”

He was fucking you so good that him cumming inside of you seemed like the best idea in the world. “Oh shit. Oh shit. Yes. Yes.”

“That’s it. Take all of me. You’re so good.” The overwhelming amount of pleasure Shao was giving you was far too much. You started to cry. Shao noticed this and he brought his hand to your eyes and wiped the tears. “I know, my Empress. You can cum soon. Wait for me.”

You didn’t think that was possible. He was hitting in all the right spots. “Please don’t stop.”

Shao loved you being so needy for him. “Oh, I don’t plan to.” The sound of skin to skin contact and your moans filled the room. When he saw you were trying to cover you mouth to conceal your moans, Shao slapped your thigh. “Move your hand.”

You whimpered some but removed it. “I-oh-don’t wanna be-oh my god-too loud.”

“I do. In fact, I need you to be louder.” The way you clenched on him made him throw his head back. He started to become close.

Your nails dug into his arms and clawed at him until he was dripping blood. That only turned him on more.

Pants started to turn into high pitch shrieks. You were too close. You didn’t think you could keep it up much longer. “I can’t.”

“Aw, you’re doing so good though.” Shao Kahn pounded into you a bit rougher. “I thought you didn’t like me but look at you. You’re about to fall apart.”

You dug your nails in more harshly and he grunted at it. The pain felt too good for him. “Please, please, please. I’m so close.”

Talking to him was doing the job. “Oh yes.” He gripped your thighs tighter to keep you in place. He planned to cum inside you and he was going to accomplish that. “Make a mess on me. Cum on your Emperor.”

The two of you released. You squirted all over his chest. He came inside you hard. So hard you could actually feel it. You moaned loudly, screaming his name.

Shao kept going until he knew you were fully done. He slowly pulled out of you and then rubbed your stomach. “You were always mine but now you are indefinitely mine.”

You could not believe you just did that.

TO BE CONTINUED????

[justlyubov]

"Good afternoon, dear friends! Today we have gathered to celebrate the ancient holiday of the peoples of Khanty and Mansi. The wagtail holiday-the holiday of waiting for a warm summer!"

"Over Konda the ice sparkled, it did not let the water dance, the wagtail flew in, the ice turned gray, and it began to crumble. The ice floes creaked with a roar, taking the frosts into the distance. She broke them with her tail, little bird, and it’s not a pity!"

*A song*

"The Khanty and Mansi revere us, the Wagtails, very much." "And the Kondinsky Mansi devoted a whole holiday to us, so there!" "And the Khanty believe that the wagtail brings happiness, and that's certainly true, for that, they call us: "йис туты вой" - ("soul-bearing bird")." "Hah! And the southern Khanty believe that thanks to the wagtail, children begin to speak, and this is true, true, true! Because when we fly south in the fall, we leave them - hmm! - a speech!" And the women, talking with the wagtail, ask her to help the children, protect them. And also the Mansi say that- *talk over each other* "Ah!" A third wagtail pushes them apart. "Boasters! You boast, but don't look around!" "So what?" They both say. "You see, there's ice everywhere!" The ice waves their hands. "Hey!" "The winter must want to return!" "Ah! But we've smashed it all! For warmth and light to come! And there they are again-!" She swats her wing at them. "-Frozen..." "Alright, sisters, don't panic! We broke it once - we will break it again! And no problem! So what are we waiting for? Let's get to it!" "Let's go!"

"What is it?! It doesn't work! Let's stomp on it." "Again doesn't work! Let's knock?" "Still doesn't work!" "Let's dance?" "Doesn't work, let's spin around. Harder, harder girls!" "Let's walk in circles. Faster, faster let's spin it! Go on, go on!" "It doesn't work at all! Well, what to do now?! We can't break the ice!" The ice closes in on them, taunting. "Scram!" The wagtails swat at it. The ice backs away and laughs. "I know! Let's ask the kids to help us!" "Well, I don't know, I don't know! What if they won't manage it?" "Well, let's try! Will you help us?" "Yes!" "Alright! Repeat all the moves after us!" "Let's melt that ice! Let's break it. Prepare your little wings!" "Yeah, show him! The ice has moved!" "Hurray! Thank you!"

"The old winter sure gave us trouble this year." "Yes, almost ruined all summer!" "Oh, look who's that over there? Ah, that's Mother-of-mothers! Only... She looks at us way too angrily! Oh, what happened to her?" Mothe-of-mothers walks around with an icy glare. "... She doesn't recognize us..." "Who has broken all of my ice?!"  "That was us, we did it!" "I wanted to freeze the hearts of humans-" "Ghasp!" "So that they couldn't enjoy the summer's light and warmth!" "Oh, sisters, isn't Mother-of-mothers bewitched by that mantle?" "Gasp! Right, we must get it off her quickly!" "There is no way! You won't succeed!" "Kids, help us, help us! Let's blow away that awful mantle off of the Mother-of-mothers! Inhale!" "On the count of three let's blow very hard at the Mother-of-mothers together, and take off that mantle!" "One...Two...Three! Blow!" "Oooh!" Mother-of-mothers gets blown away towards the ice. "Again, one more time!" "Ooh!" "Again, do it again!" "Ooh!" "Huzzah!"

"Oh! What's happening here? Why are you trying to blow me away?" "Yes, we did it! The spell is off! "We, respected Mother-of-mothers, we're saving you from the mantle the winter has cast on you, bewitching you. She wanted to freeze everyone!" "Oh, she's tricky! Doesn't want to give up. But it's summer already! My dear messengers of summer light and warmth, thank you!" "And thank you, kids!" "I ask the spirits of the sky to send us a hot long summer. Warm rains, so that the berries would appear as soon as possible. Let the rivers and lakes be full of fish, and the forests of beasts!"

"Mother-of-mothers, let's test how well the kids know our birds!" "Yes, let's play our favorite game, that's called-"Guess who's voice."" "Let's play?" "Yes!" *Play the game* (I don't feel like writing all that. Maybe later.)

"Good job, kids!"

"My dear adult daughters and sons- Oh!" The men with drums walk in "Haha!" "My dear children, I congratulate you on the holiday of the wagtail! The first summer bird has flown, the sacred little bird has flown. The winter won't come back!" "Hurrah!" "My dears, it's time for us to depart. Piece to you, kind people!" The woman sings. "A warm summer to you! Fareeval!" Speaks language "Whole hands to you whole legs, live happily, and have good thoughts! speaks language" walks off stage.

[thebeardiswriting]

We'll sail Inner Harbor and Delaware Bay The Hudson, the Schuylkill and tip of Cape May Brandishing glasses and tankards galore In search of the barley juice up on the shore And it's toast to the lassies And drink to the lads Remember the women and song that we hadŠ We'll fill-up our glasses And empty the kegs Then head-out for more on what's left of our legs We'll stagger on in to the pubs and the bars Foresaking our vessels for domestic cars Insulting the strong, and exalting the weak Œtil were too drunk to fight and too tired to speak And it's toast to the lassies And drink to the lads Remember the women and song that we hadŠ We'll fill-up our glasses And empty the kegs Then head out for more on what's left of our legs We trade Dublin for Philly, and York for New York As long as there's Whiskey we'll sure take the work We won't bring the muskets, we won't cause the pain But we're good for some headaches, and tough to clean stains And it's toast to the lassies And drink to the lads Remember the women and song that we hadŠ We'll fill-up our glasses And empty the kegs Then head-out for more on what's left of our legs And it's toast to the lassies And drink to the lads Remember the women and song that we hadŠ We'll fill-up our glasses And empty the kegs Then head-out for more on what's left of our legs Rocky Road to Dublin While in the merry month of May from me home I started Left the girls of Tuam so sad and broken hearted Saluted father dear, kissed me darling mother Drank a pint of beer, me grief and tears to smother Then off to reap the corn, leave where I was born Cut a stout black thorn to banish ghosts and goblins; Bought a pair of brogues rattling o'er the bogs And fright'ning all the dogs on the rocky road to Dublin One, two, three four, five Hunt the Hare and turn her down the rocky road All the way to Dublin, Whack follol de rah ! In Mullingar that night I rested limbs so weary Started by daylight next morning blithe and early Took a drop of pure to keep me heartfrom sinking; Thats a Paddy's cure whenever he's on drinking See the lassies smile, laughing all the while At me curious style, 'twould set your heart a bubblin' Asked me was I hired, wages I required I was almost tired of the rocky road to Dublin One, two, three four, five Hunt the Hare and turn her down the rocky road All the way to Dublin, Whack follol de rah ! In Dublin next arrived, I thought it such a pity To be soon deprived a view of that fine city So then I took a stroll, all among the quality; Me bundle it was stole, all in a neat locality Something crossed me mind, when I looked behind No bundle could I find upon me stick a wobblin' Enquiring for the rogue, they said me Connaught brogue Wasn't much in vogue on the rocky road to Dublin One, two, three four, five Hunt the Hare and turn her down the rocky road All the way to Dublin, Whack follol de rah ! From there I got away, me spirits never falling Landed on the quay, just as the ship was sailing The Captain at me roared, said that no room had he; When I jumped aboard, a cabin found for Paddy Down among the pigs, played some hearty rigs Danced some hearty jigs, the water round me bubbling; When off Holyhead I wished meself was dead Or better for instead on the rocky road to Dublin One, two, three four, five Hunt the Hare and turn her down the rocky road All the way to Dublin, Whack follol de rah ! Well the boys of Liverpool, when we safely landed Called meself a fool, I could no longer stand it Blood began to boil, temper I was losing; Poor old Erin's Isle they began abusing "Hurrah me soul" says I, me Shillelagh I let fly Some Galway boys were nigh and saw I was a hobble in With a load "hurray !" joined in the affray We quitely cleared the way for the rocky road to Dublin One, two, three four, five Hunt the Hare and turn her down The rocky road and all the way to Dublin Whack follol de rah !

[not-ur-normie]

Cristal witches, aka Sasha making headcanons for the world of Eldarya

I have this idea since forever at this point, so I figured it wouldn't hurt a fly to talk about it a little. It comes from years before when I wanted my OC to not be human but some kind of magic creature, so here we go.

English is not my first languange, so I am apologizing in advance.

Note: Throughout the post, the timespan is after the Blue Sacrifice, but I will talk about that too later on.

Who are cristal witches?

Cristal witches are witches who hold power connected to maana.

The bigger maana surronds them, the bigger their powers get

The reason they are called cristal witches is because they can form a connection with the Crystal

They are creatures with big potencial to play big roles in Eldarya, but that is exactly the point where things go wrong

More about witches

Most cristal witches are women, it's really rare when a male is born and inherits magical power, but there are cases when it happens

There were never any worry about them dying out, since the genes are VERY strong

When a male and female cristal witch have a child who is also one, they turn out way stronger then the others who only have one parent being one

Don't get me wrong, one parent makes the kid already strong as it is, but two parents are just a whole new level

Cristal witches all have tattoos, all in different colors. Most of the time the colors don't have anything to do with the powers they can hold, but lighter colors indicate lighter powers, meaning: lighter colors can't use magic that requires bigger maana usage, like black magic, or healing magic

(If you play the game, you sure know the voodoo outfit, I based the tattoos on those tattoos, so you can see the colors if you google it)

Since cristal witches are a heavily mixed community thanks to the overload of women, there are times where kids inherit both of their parents specific genetics

It's rare tho, because of the witch genes mixing up with other races' is not that common

But when it happens, it always gains attention

Cristal witches are not just cristal witches because they are connected to the Crystal, but because they literally have crystals all over their body

These crystals are mostly small ones and has the color of the tattoos

They are really human-like, so if they can hide their tattos and crystals they can perfectly blend in, which did come handy at some point

Their lifespan is about 150-200 years

They are able to open the portal to the human world

(here you can see the children of my OC [Chrystal] and Ezarel, who were lucky enough to inherit both of their parents genes, so they are witches with elf ears.)

How did they live?

Back then cristal witches lived in small communities, mostly small villages, but there where some communities living a full nomad life

Since they live so long, there were not many of them to begin with

These smaller communities lived close to each other way back then, but the nomad communities started to move around after a while

These are highly spiritual communities, especially that they are fully able to communicate with the Oracle if they wish so

They had special type of education, where witches were learning to use basic magic, while non-witches who lived with them learned alchemy

They had strict rules, that everybody needed to follow, they weren't allowed to use their power randomly

They needed to get an approval to use magic that requires more manna than your basic magic, and also to use dangerous or risky magic

If somebody went against this rule more than 5 times, they got their magic taken away

They choose new leader every year, although if a leader was good, they sticked with them and kept on picking them

The leader was not leading alone, although they made the final decisions

There were many smaller position available next to the leader, which are also chosen by the other witches

Overally they are really pieceful, so the conflicts are not that common

Cristal witches are able to do many things with magic, but it takes a lifetime to gain a really controlled power, so older, well-educated witches are highly respected and the leader was chosen from them most of the times

Some really strong witches are even able to bring back people from the death, but only if they're right there when the death happens

The Blue Sacrifice

The reason that Cristal witches were never part of the council that planned out the Sacrifice was that the races forming the council agreed that Eldarya could need them in the future (and they were damned right)

Before the Sacrifice taken place, witches were not that strong than after it happend

I imagine it the way, that once the sacrifice was made, Eldarya alone had more maana than when the two worlds were one and since witches' powers are mostly maana based, it made their powers grow way stronger than before

(I hope this makes sense lol)

Where things went wrong

As I mentioned before, they are creatures with big potential

When the Blue Sacrifice went wrong, the races in Eldarya needed the witches help the most

Almost every community, town, villige, whatever had at least one witch living with them to help out whenever there were high need

The problem is, that there was always high need; as we know Eldarya was in trouble

With the help of the witches it was easier to go for supplies to the human world, although only those communities could do this who had stronger, more experienced witches

There were even witches who were able to cast spells and make the field able to grow some edible plants

And this is exactly where things went terribly wrong

Since cristal witches have a high value, there were many who hunted them or tortured them for their powers

Why? Well, I know all the above reasons would be enough, but there are more to it

Cristal witches' blood is able to make the lifespan of whoever drinks it longer

And not just that, but it can completely function as food, it stops hunger for longer periods of time (weeks, sometimes months, depending on power) and makes the immune system 100% healthy

It was also used for really expensive medication

You know what else is really valuable? The tears of witches.

It can fasten healing and was used for many medication as well as their blood

But only tears that hold heavy emotions count, since the tear drops turn into little crystals

These informations spread real fast after a while and witch hunts became so serious that at one point several communities started to think that it would be better to sacrifice them as well so maybe Eldarya could gain its full balance [the Guard of El also wanted this, just in case you were curious]

Witches would've 100% sacrificed themselfs if they got asked by the time the Blue Sacrfice happend

But after all the terror they went through, their trust was completely broken

They did not want to die for all these selfish folks wanting to murder them, not thinking about their race for a single second

So one day they completely vanished

Nobody knows how exactly, the common guess was that they opened the portal and moved to the human world, giving up on their magic

I mean everything was better than dying for your murderers

After the vanish

Of course, not all of the witches vanished, but the witch communities that lived together

Those who lived in certain places helping out stayed there

Back then the Guard of El had a witch with them too

Sadly, they got scared of her possibly gaining control over the guard, since she was very much loved... So they decided to kill her [yes, they wanted to sacrifice her, and then killed her, way to go]

The last known cristal witch was a male, living with the Fenghuangs, but he died just before The Origins' story starts

But... Are they really all gone?

Okaaaay soooo I bet there are stuff in this which doesn't exactly fit the story and/or I remember incorrectly, but it is what it is.

On the very first art you can see my OC named Chrystal. Well, she arrives to Eldarya the same way Erika did in the original story, the main difference is that she turnes out to be a cristal witch and this fact leaves the guard in a numb shock. Suddenly the only living cristal witch is with them and that is changing their situation entirely.

I am sure I will write down Chrystals story with illustratons and whatnot, but currently I am working on my Moonligh Lovers' OC's illus, so that will take some time.

Anyway, this will have another part, I wanna at least introduce Chrystal so you can see a cristal witch in action, hurray.

Ah, yeah, if there are facts from the game messed up, feel free to tell me, I am not biting. You can also use this idea for your ocs, I don't mind. Hugs<3

[freyrmichokolatte]

Dr. Stone Headcanon for @paultiteuf360!

There was a child

A small, tiny, helpless, little child that has no parents. Inside of the laboratory.

To make the story short, Chrome tripped on a rock and a revival fluid came out from a sack and went flying to the petrified boy

And that leads to where we are now

The little boy currently has a piece of cloth wrapped on his body since Yuzuriha is currently busy with her own bussiness

They don't know what to do

According to the boy, his name was "Nikolai Galanis". He might be born from Russia or Greece due to his accent and name, according to Gen at least.

Also he's a ginger

They don't mind it tho they don't really care

Yuzuriha finally cam back from her work and immediately sew descent clothes for Nikolai

A few days had passed and during those few days, the Science Kingdom have been taking care of Nikolai

The females especially

Kohaku Ruri, and Suika (11 yrs old) had always wanted a younger brother

The Starlight Sisters enjoy his company too

*Cue every Female pampering Nikolai

Actual heacanons starting here

Nikolai would always ask Kohaku and Ruri how to be like them

He would play pretend as a "Fearless and Strong Warrior" just like Kohaku

He also play as a "Gentle but but Brave Prince" just like Ruri (He knows that Ruri is a priestess not a princess)

Minami would always show him some of her picture taken works

She takes pictures of Nature and give them to Nikolai so he can color it since Nikolai loves to draw and paint(yes they have coloring utensils)

Out of all the girls and women, Nikki and Yuzuriha would watch over Nikolai the most

Yuzuriha would teach Nikolai how to stitch because he has nothing better to do

Spoiler: He enjoyed it

Nikki gives him piggy-back-rides whenever he wants

Nikolai called her сестра (sister)

She did not know what that means

Nikki sobbed and squeezed Nikolai when Gen explained what сестра means

The Starlight sisters kept sobbing on his cuteness

They would squish and gently squeeze his chubby cheeks

Big-Sister-Forehead-Kisses everyday and every minute

Despite still being claimed as an enemy of the Kingdom of Science, Nikolai likes Homura

Homura finds it strange that a child would want to her to be his company

But she can't possibly tell him to screw off he's a child

They play bingo and UNO :]

The kids are happy that they have another playmate to play with

Suika, Mirai, and Namari (Ishigami Village's child artist) plays with him the most

Nikolai and Namari bonds over drawing and painting

They would also share their tips on drawing and painting

Mirai likes to make flower crowns with everyone and that includes Nikolai

Would put flowers on his head sometimes

Suika taught Nikolai everything she knows about being sneaky so he could also be a crewmate

He sadly got caught because his hiding spot was way too obvious

They didn't bother to turn back because they're already on the middle of the ocean anyway

Hurray

More headcanons about Nikolai and Dr. Stone women coming soon (Treasure Island arc) because they need more screen time and @paultiteuf360 requested for this

Might also make a Nikolai info dump

[keep-on-reading-on]

AwaE episode 6

TLDR: the episode is a metaphor and it’s a really IMPORTANT ONE I’m sorry it didn’t feel good!!

So I’m seeing a lot of people being like “we’re clowns again” and “Gilbert wasn’t himself” and like yeah same and those emotions are valid, but what I can’t quite wrap my head around is people not liking the episode over that??? Like, this fandom has it so easy. Far worse things have been done to the characterization of central love interests over much longer periods of time and that doesn’t make those characters irredeemable. But what’s more, I feel like the point of this episode is to be a slap in the face of what matters against what we prioritize. Think about it, at the beginning of this episode Anne FINALLY understands her feelings for Gilbert AND admits them(!), then she spends nearly the entire fair either looking for Gilbert, seeking out answers about love and Gilbert, feeling agony over Gilbert and then she literally ASKS TO GO HOME! Anne the (before she realized she loved Gil) bride of adventure wants to miss out on an experience with endless scope for the imagination because she can’t see past the romantic problems she’s run into. (Side note: are we not gonna talk about how out of character that feels for Anne? Cause it’s supposed to. Just like Gil not caring and being unattentive to Anne feels out of character. It’s because love makes us all act like fools and loose sight of ourselves. Anyway...) Then Marilla’s like “how about a new perspective?” And they go on an amazing little adventure (also while they’re flying there’s a comment about ‘can you see Green Gables from here?’ Which is a very deliberate reminder of the fact that Anne, whose problems feel so crushing has things that at some points she never imagined she’d have. Ya know, like a HOME) and after flying she tells Diana her problems seem smaller, hurray! Clarity! But then crap there’s Gilbert and our hearts hurt again, but then this whole thing with Josie comes along because it’s the slap in the face that ANNE needed to remember who she is and what really matters to her — and that’s justice and equality. SO, this message is deliberate in the episode for Anne as much as the viewers. Yes, it is so much fun to obsess over the “will they?won’t they?” and love BUT those things should not be allowed to dull the light inside of you and they should NEVER cloud your judgement of the truth. Final thoughts: Think about how last episode ended; after the dancing and heart eyes we’re brought back to female empowerment and love and in this episode after all of Anne’s heartache and confusion that’s where we go back to as well. It’s easy to “just love being a woman” when you have love and hope and support from other women, but the rest of our true nature is our strength when we are hurting and judged and alone.

[everythingjonsa]

Season 8 Trailer... first impressions - Part 1

It’s here finally... and it doesn’t give away much!! Lol.

I’m really trying to be unbiased here, so forgive me fellow shippers. Also this got really long, so I’m going to do it in parts.

The trailer starts off with Arya who’s looking injured and scared even, running through interconnected corridors (now we know what James Hibberd was talking about extended sets of Winterfell and interconnected corridors). I’m not sure it’s in the crypts. It could be anywhere else in Winterfell.

I know death.

We then get a glimpse of a very solemn looking Davos, who is standing on the ramparts of Winterfell with guards stationed all over. I’m assuming this is Winterfell’s second line of defence in the battle plan?

He’s got many faces.

Arya runs some more, huffing and panting. I think I can almost see blood on the right side of her face.

The scene cuts to Varys turning his head to look at someone/something. There are many other ladies sitting in the background. I’m almost sure I saw Gilly with baby Sam, in this group. It looks like they’re in the Crypts of Winterfell- cause one can see (Gilly?) sitting under the statue of one of the kings of Winter? This is perhaps when Winterfell is under attack and the women and children are taken to the crypts? for safekeeping.

I look forward to seeing this one.

Arya is talking to someone (most probably Jon or the hound?) in perhaps one of the first two episodes while looking at a weapon made out of dragonglass. Which means Arya is definitely interested in facing the others in the battle between the living and the dead.

I can’t help but notice the parallels between the first scene of the trailer and Arya’s scene in which she cleverly outwits the waif in season 6.

So hold on to your horses, fans of Arya Stark. Almost nothing is as it appears to be.

Moving on, we cut to a glimpse of a Greyjoy ship with perhaps the golden company en route but we also see a blonde haired guy ( looking dangerously similar to a young Jamie Lannister) at its helm. New character?? Dunno

And Well Hurray!! Tormund is alive. So is Edd and Beric dondarion. Well at least for a little while. Where are they? Castle Black? Winterfell? Your guess is as good as mine.

AND then: We cut to a somber looking Sam, with Bran in the background turning to look at someone/something. Is it Jon entering the room to finally discover his real identity? Is it Sam turning to look at Dany after having learnt that she barbecued his family? But this development definitely looks like it’s from the first two episodes.

Cersei

Looks happy and content in the next scene. Is this when Jon’s supposed to meet her? Or was that just a fake scene, lol. Or Is she receiving the golden company ?

But from the look on her face one can assume that whatever she has planned until that point has worked to her advantage.

Jon and Dany

Are riding amidst the army of the unsullied marching into Winterfell, looking very powerful together, representing the strong alliance that the living has forged, against the death.

Sansa

This scene immediately cuts to Sansa who sees the dragons flying above Winterfell. She doesn’t look intimidated by them. She infact follows their flight. But she definitely doesn’t look too happy about it. Also I couldn’t help but notice that Sansa is on the battlements of Winterfell, observing the incoming army and allies that Jon has managed to gather, as though she wants her personal space when she’s trying to gauge the situation.

Also, it’s the first time in the trailer when a jon/Dany scene cuts to Sansa .

Then the scene cuts to Dany walking towards a brooding Jon (not surprising), in the crypts of Winterfell. He’s not looking happy and neither is she. I think this is from the first episode.

What’s also very interesting in this scene is Jon’s voice over.

He says - They’re coming.

We’re shown a montage of Dany coming towards him.

He says- Our enemy doesn’t tire and we get to see Dany looking at him.

It could mean everything, or nothing at all.

Next part coming up!!

[monstermonstre]

ok done with s3 of stranger th*ngs, here’s some immediate thoughts under the cut for spoilers, do not reblog thank you

- i’m struggling to find a character that has had a proper arc this season; stuff happened and they were there, almost nothing affected the characters personally or change them in any way, stuff happened and they were there

- hurray for lesbian robin and gay will; altho the lack of exploration of mike’s comment to will about it felt almost “queercatchey”->robin got a longer and more satisfying convo out of it and she's new to the show...we’ve been with will from the start

- one of the more blatant piece of pro-american pro-capitalism propaganda i’ve ever seen, and just in case we didn’t get it from the overabundance of imagery they made sure erica would give us a lecture every now and then (i’m just talking about the parts they wrote of her commenting on the “free market”, apart from that i love her character and the actress)

- the product placements was as bad as the ones in clueless, except the ones in clueless are almost part of the charm, here it just got exhausting; the the thing/new coke comparison was insane and shouldn’t have happened

- what was the point of billy for the past two seasons? if it’s because the actor wanted to go, i feel that they should have either truly kept him in the background or done a better job at writing him an arc...i saw an article calling it a “massive emotional storyline” like xD where

- if they have to make the lights flicker every time the monster is there to hide the CGI, why didn’t they show it less or put more budget into it if it looked that bad? again, really tired of the lights flickering every time and it gets super obvious; not blaming the cgi team tho, this is a hundred percent not on them

- again, every thing fell flat. i know i hatewatch the show so i’m biased, it’s not like i cared much for any of them from the start, but really from a writing pov again...it felt like i was watching stuff happen and people react to it but in a very detached way. you could have replaced any of the characters with any thing the result would have been the same. maybe the P I X A R letters fighting back against a giant evil desk lamp would have been more emotional idk

- i liked the body horror of the monster, the idea of those bodies breaking down into just flesh and bones and merging together. that was super horrific i liked it. made me want to rewatch The Fly

- the duff bros really don’t like women very much and write the straightest relationships ever, thank god for robin to whom they couldn’t really do that too ‘cause she’s gay ergo it’s not possible to pair her up with steve ergo she’s the only one who gets to be just friends with a guy; oh and the amount of footage of women crying and getting assaulted by billy and the monster didn’t help

- idk i feel like this might be the season where people realise it’s not that good of a show

[rottentomatoestheater3000]

CHALLENGE 6: Jeff Goldblum

There’s a certain allure to some actors, which is what drew us to a Jeff Goldblum day. Also, Johnny hadn’t seen The Fly (or the original Independence Day) so this needed to happen. We ended up with The Lost World & Resurgence due to rating spacing and how much Goldblum was in Lost World versus say the first or third films.

The List

1.    Thor: Ragnarok (2017)

2.    The Fly (1986)

3.    The Adventures of Buckaroo Banzai Across the 8th Dimension (1984)

4.    Jurassic Park: The Lost World (1997)

5.    Independence Day: Resurgence (2016)

6.    Man of the Year (2006)

The Findings

Preface: Regardless of how much we did or didn’t enjoy the movie, we did notice an odd corrolation with the ratings - the further away from the 80s the movie gets (either in production year or aesthetics - I’m looking at you, Ragnarok), the worse the rating is. Also, for some reason, every character Goldblum plays fucks. Every one.

1.    Thor: Ragnarok (2017) Tomato Meter - 92%

Scientists Say: “I think Ragnarok is a piece of fucking Art. We’ve seen this movie all before, but honestly, it’s doing Goldblum a disservice not showing this movie. Bless Taika Waititi for making this movie.” - J

2.    The Fly (1986) Tomato Meter - 91% [Content Warning: Body Horror]

Scientists Say: “This movie was. Okay? Like the plot was pretty good, and the acting was good. I’m always a little turned off with 80s values towards women, especially considering Grade A Creep ended up getting a slot as a Good Guy in the end, but it didn’t make the movie terrible. I do highly warn people about some body horror content, because while I enjoy myself a good smattering of weird body horror things, this turned my stomach occasionally.” - J

3.    The Adventures of Buckaroo Banzai Across the 8th Dimension (1984) Tomato Meter - 71%

Scientists Say: “This movie seemed like what happens when a 15 year old weebaboo gets a hold on some story telling software, be it flash animation or Microsoft Word, and writes a 50k word novella about his super awesome badass surgeon/ninja/scientist/racecar driver and his super cool friends. Like it’s not a bad movie, and it’s an enjoyable watch, but there’s absolutely no way to take any movie seriously when the main character is like a Masculine Barbie with 200 jobs and more connections than God, and one of the bad guys is LITERALLY named John BigBooty.” - J

4.    Jurassic Park: The Lost World (1997) Tomato Meter - 53%

Scientists Say: “Lost World was never my absolute favorite of the original Jurassic Park trilogy (here’s looking at you, JP3), but I do always enjoy it. Especially the honking baby T-Rex. I’ve always found people either enjoy the dinosaurs and love these movies, or aren’t here for the dinosaurs and only tend to like the first one and there’s not a lot of in between, so I get the rating.” - J

5.    Independence Day: Resurgence (2016) Tomato Meter - 31%

Scientists Say: “I entered into this experience without having seen the first Independance Day. Steve helpfully recapped it - aliens happened, earth did the thing, hurray - right before. I still enjoyed this movie, though I found it the least strong of the set. I am biased, though, as I’m always a sucker for any kind of decent space alien movie and I really loved the alien’s designs. I can definitely see the low rating, though, and I honestly would have to take off any points I did give it because they did Kill Their Gays.” - J

6.    Man of the Year (2006) Tomato Meter - 21%

Scientists Say: “If you watch this movie, and you live in the US, brace yourself. This movie did not age well, and by didn’t age well I meant aged far too well and I’m uncomfortable. The plot? Comedian with no political background gets elected president due to voter fraud and bad capitalism practices. Seems a LITTLE too familiar, doesn’t it? It really is a good film, and if you keep the date in mind - 2006 was during the second G.W. Bush term and the last Dem on the plate was John Kerry, for the context - it���s really a good piece of media. Robin Williams is phenomenal, the writing is good and the jokes really are funny. It just hits FAR too close to home to be able to enjoy it right now, considering everything that’s happened.” - J

[thefreshfinds]

BROOKLYN UNITY FEST:

There is strength in numbers and the Brooklyn Unity Fest went ahead to prove that theory in their 8th annual event. If someone were to question "Where Brooklyn at?" the proof would be front and center. Ultimately the Brooklyn Unity Fest gave back to its community in a major way!

Aside from its free giveaway on Summer Jam tickets, bikes and t-shirts — there was also a Fabolous Way 3 Point Contest and Stomp the Violence Dance Contest.

From the basketball courts, vendors, face painting, multiple stages and even a bouncy house — the festival made sure to bask in its pride.

Overall, everyone was very accepting. Once the performers went onstage their was a common ground shared between the younger and older generation.

Not only were their crowds of kids doing the Stanky Leg, but there was all smiles and a fascination towards the new age sound. Many of the artists recieved new fans but their main focus was giving their all in the name of hip-hop. The genre has taken them to new heights and for that matter they encourage others to follow their dreams. In a word, there was no other place that I wanted to be! The Brooklyn Unity Fest had great vibes. No wonder Brooklyn is the Most Thorough Borough! Their community is willing to give a lending hand if needed be.

Although I wasn't able to interview all of the performers, here are some brilliant creatives that I had an opportunity to speak with:

1. MARLEE HENDRIX: Known for being authentically dope, Mr. 70's cared to elaborate not only through his super fly assemble of jet-black boots (with flowers on the heel) fedora and lime green pants — but also through his genre-defying style of soul and hip-hop. At most, Marlee's palette for music brings his sound to life but what drives it even further are the artist that he's moved by. As said by Hendrix, the Temptations (and even Eminem) inspire him because of the different things they bring to the table. "Music is in my bones." Hendrix says.

INSTAGRAM: @marleehendrix

MUSIC LINK: https://m.youtube.com/channel/UCg05CAoXgpKWMbv9bDSRIJQ?itct=CBoQ6p4EIhMI86S32v7g4gIVbYacCh0JNQ0h&csn=dGP_XPKQEoPR8wSt94XwAw&wlfg=true

2. SOULJIASPAIDE and EVELINASOWAVY: Two who share a bloodline, Souljiaspaide and Evelinasowavy do it to perfection. Even when they've been through the wringer, they're above it all and venture into money missions. Starting off her music journey when her mom bought a computer, Souljiaspaide began to record her own songs. Then as time passed, Evelinasowavy came in and did a solid 16 which left Souljiaspaide in awe. "I didn't even know she could rap." Likewise they share a love for hip-hop. For them it's everything and it all comes down to Tupac because he's an artist who educates. With this in mind, they want upcoming artist to stay positive. "Don't get annoyed," Evelinasowavy says. "It can happen. Don't let anything get in your way." Souljiaspaide adds.

INSTAGRAM(S): @souljiaspaidedwa + @evelinasowavy

MUSIC LINK:

A) SOULJIASPAIDE: https://soundcloud.com/souljaspaide

B) EVELINA: https://soundcloud.com/evelinamusic

3. D.CHAMBERZ and D.MCCRO: D.Chamberz and D.MCCRO wear a lot of hats in the music industry. While D.Chamberz brings the ruthless bars, D.MCCRO makes the soundscape so D.Chamberz can freely express himself. On a whole, D.Chamberz gained something from hip-hop and it helped him control his emotions. He puts his pen to the pad and works with a music group whereas D.MCCRO works in the hottest studios in New York. He is an engineer and producer. Motivated by money, both keep a green thumb. They’ve got their Benjamin’s aligned,

INSTAGRAM(S): @dchamberzciw + @iamdmccro_ondatrack

MUSIC LINK:

A) D.CHAMBERZ: https://linktr.ee/dchamberzciw

4. DATWINPRINCE: Swagful with the drip on his neck and wrist — DATWINPRINCE rode his own wave at the festival. As he gave the crowd a boost of energy when he performed "Drip 3X" DATWINPRINCE gleamed from ear-to-ear because it really just comes easy. Off the rip, DATWINPRINCE identifies as a professional Milly Rocker, dedicated singer and rapper. Still, the grind never stops. Every year he pushes even harder because it's all just preparation and practice. Good music goes a long way, "It made me realize I had a way to express the things I felt, but was always scared to say." DATWINPRINCE says. In the same way he is the voice for those who feel the same. The dope vibes never end. *Make sure to check out his latest single, "DRIP3X", it's on all streaming platforms.*

INSTAGRAM: @datwinprince

MUSIC LINK: https://ampl.ink/dbPxp

5. JX and BIG DAWG K: Real recognizes real & when I spoke to them I just knew they were it. Even though the two exinguish the blaze in their 16's alone, they create a mine field when facing their competitors. As an outsider, I could sense the energy they both share and I've got to say it's very inspiring. At just 9 years old JX was writing and so the pen manifested them into rhymes. Even at a young the first song he sung was"Hip-Hop Hurray." But JX hopes that his music inspires and encourages others to be themselves. In the same way Big Dawg K wants his music to say that dreams are achievable. "If you put your mind to it, you can achieve anything." Middle school was where his music journey started and for the MC, when he's onstage it's another day in the office. On the other hand, JX says to himself "let's go kill it". However they both just aim to have fun. Expect a mixtape from JX on DatPiff in July. For now check out Big Dawg K's album, Soul Food (on all streaming platforms) and JX's video "730 Freestyle" on Worldstar.

INSTAGRAM(S):

@therealjx + @bigdawgk_fnf

MUSIC LINKS:

A) JX: https://m.youtube.com/watch?feature=youtu.be&v=kTWP_mVkESg

B) BIG DAWG K: https://snd.click/SSNCTWI

6. ZOE E ROSEGOLD: A 9-to-5 chick with a ride-or-die soul, Zoe stands for all the women in her sound. As she test all of the genre-elements, Zoe makes sure that her music is for self-enjoyment. Before she gets onstage, the star plans to deliver a message. However she really leaves it up to God. Aside from herself, she's really moved by the rap game because it's now given women a turn to dominate! Even though she just started her journey a year ago, music has always had a place in her heart. "I went to school and graduated with my nursing degree but the music just kept caling." she says. while you're on the road listen to her single, "Coke Music". It defines what her sound does to you.

INSTAGRAM: @officialzoeenyc

MUSIC LINK: https://distrokid.com/hyperfollow/zoeerosegold/zoe-e-rose-gold-ii

7. FEE DOLLAZ: With swag on a mf'ing 1000, Fee Dollaz rap style goes untouched. She's really her best self on and off the stage so it's safe to say that she's going places. Although she's from D.C, the rap star felt right at home when entering the Greater New York. Hip-hop has always been a passion of hers and when she says she is tired of a 9-to-5, many "100" emojis go up in favor. Likewise, hip-hop for Fee is bouncy, fun and real. Expect a 90's twist in her sound along some personable rhymes. Her message to the upcoming artist is to be you and follow your dreams. Make sure to bump "Set it Off" on the road. But the best is yet to come! Stay tuned for her album "World of My Own."

INSTAGRAM: @feedollaz

MUSIC LINK: http://hyperurl.co/pwtl9q

8. LIVELIKEDAVIS: The epitome of the fire emoji, LIVELIKEDAVIS brings the flame in 2019 and for many years to come. An avid fan of his, it was only right to tell him how amazing "Choppa For Advice" was but what I came to learn is that LIVELIKEDAVIS has been getting spins from the DJ off the rip. LIVELIKEDAVIS has been pursuing music since he was 13 years old but it really got far once he blew up on Vine in 2013. LIVELIKEDAVIS says that hip-hop is for self-expression and allows one to put it all on the table. But what inspires him the most is hip-hop's ability to paint a vivid picture of the artist's backstory. His advice for all upcoming artist is to stay constistent and to never listen to anyone but yourself. Take his word for it. LIVELIKEDAVIS plans on releasing a project soon. My question is: Will the fans get to hear a Lil Tjay feature? Maybe so. Go and stream “BEYBLADE” now. It’s available on all platforms

INSTAGRAM: @livelikedavis

MUSIC LINK: https://ffm.to/qm7v17k

9. SANTOS: Santos has a larger than life personality. Not only does he carry the same influential power that music does, but he also has an business man mentality, because he’s about his business, man. Starting off with his own marketing company, Santos was blessed with the opportunity to showcase his talents to BET. In turn, Santos shined through the lights and now is apart of the show, Hustle in Brooklyn. Besides this Santos also has his own record label. When he scouts out for talent, they must have a vision and ambition. Really it just shows that they’re ten toes down for the long haul. Santos list women and his mother as personal inspirations. On the road Santos likes to shuffle between 50 Cent, Jay-Z, 2Pac and Biggie. His word of advice to any upcoming artist is to spend the same amount of money you would on Jordan’s on an LLC. If you can’t invest in yourself how do you expect for others to?

INSTAGRAM: @tosmoney

[douxreviews]

Charmed - Season One Review

"A toast to the Power of Three, whether we like it or not."

It's strange looking back on the series Charmed used to be. There's such a stark difference between the fun, family-centric early episodes, and the trashy, offensive later ones. Despite the questionable dialogue, woeful guest stars, and plotting blunders that became signature for the series post Season Four, Charmed was often home to some sharply written family drama, enthralling mythology, and an incredibly likable core cast. This all fell apart long before the doors of Halliwell manor closed for the final time in 2006, but nearly two decades later I still find myself attached to these three imperfect, yet strong women who are thrown headfirst into this wacky world of witches, demons and bad leather get-ups. Spoilers ahead!

In Season One, Charmed faces the same growing pains that a lot of similar high concept dramas do when they start out, struggling to get the mix of fantastical ingredients just right. Though series opener 'Something Wicca This Way Comes' is a solid and compelling hour, episodes like 'Thank You For Not Morphing', and series low 'The Wedding From Hell', serve as lessons learned for the writing team, with the latter episode in particular feeling like some sort of unintentional parody of the series Charmed was trying to be. Think 'I Robot, You Jane' from Buffy's debut season; the general concept of the series is solid, but elements chosen for a particular episode just don't work the same way they did on paper. Even the first antagonists the girls face seem to be ripped right out of some trashy straight-to-video horror film, and the likes of recurring villains Rex and Hannah feel like more of a wasted opportunity rather than a taste of what the larger big bads in this universe have got in store for the Halliwells.

In the face of some questionable choices elsewhere, the series is forced into relying on the strength of the three leads, something that's immediately evident from the outset. The Halliwells are all well-crafted, relatable characters, with the appeal of each sister buoyed by the charisma and talent of the three lead performers. Prue may be a little stiff initially, but Shannen Doherty's star power comes off in spades even in the drabbest of scenes; Alyssa is the perfect choice for the fun-loving/work-hating youngest sibling, filling Phoebe with endless charm and wide-eyed optimism; and Holly is similarly likable, though Piper's signature surliness doesn't get to come out and play until her first "centric" episode, 'The Wendigo'.

The supporting characters aren't nearly as appealing, though lack of choice feels like a huge factor where that's concerned. Prue's ex, Andy, who just so happens to be a SFPD Detective, serves as a solid love interest for Prue, and temporary foil for the sisters, though at times his presence feels clumsily written in. He's killed in the crossfire of a Halliwell/Demon battle at the close of the season, something that, while sad for Prue, is somewhat of a relief given how repetitive his role in the show was getting. Andy's partner, Darryl Morris, feels like he's there (and I hate to say this) to tick a box in terms of cast diversity, because as a character in his own right he's fairly vacuous. Andy's death gives him the chance to step into a more prominent role in Season Two, but he has very little to do this year. Leo is only a recurring character here, though it's quite obvious that he will be sticking around following his reveal as the sisters' whitelighter – a sort of guardian angel for witches. He's got charm, for sure, though he fails to really stand out as much as you would expect given how heavily featured he ends up becoming later on in the series.

The show is admittedly clunky in a lot of the early episodes, but by the time the season reaches the halfway mark it starts to hit its stride. 'That '70s Episode' is the pinnacle of Charmed's debut season, pairing the rich history of the Halliwell family with the dynamic relationship between the three leads, as the girls travel back in time and meet their late mother and younger selves. 'Deja Vu All Over Again' also plays with the time-travelling element, resulting in the first sucker punch of the series; Andy's death. It's a twist that ups the stakes and leads to some wonderful character work in the following season. 'Out of Sight', another highlight, is the perfect blend of the real world threats the girls face (an overly nosy reporter) and the more sinister otherworldly ones (the Grimlocks). The antagonists greatly improve in the second half as well, culminating in a surprising but wonderful guest spot from David Carradine as time master Tempus in the season finale.

The confidence of the latter episodes leads into a stronger sophomore season, but the first year always felt like the purest representation of the show's original mantra: "three sisters who happen to be witches, not three witches who happen to be sisters". This is especially true of how wonderfully the sibling drama is played from the beginning. With a complicated history already in place thanks to Prue's distrust of Phoebe and her supposed role in Prue's breakup with her "chardonnay-slugging" fiance Roger, there's a well of drama ready to be bled dry the second Phoebe walks into the manor in the first episode. Piper's role as the middle sister holds remarkably true, as she spends a lot of her time playing referee between Prue and Phoebe, with the youngest sibling's proclivity for a more carefree lifestyle driving the older, more sensible sister crazy. Almost every episode is deeply rooted in the sisters' relationship, with their bond growing tighter the stronger their magic gets. It's a great concept that is, at least in these early episodes, executed beautifully.

Potions and Notions

The casting of the Halliwell women remains impeccable. Finola Hughes and Jennifer Rhodes were so great as the girls' mother Patty, and their Grams, Penny; it's no wonder they came back in many different instances throughout the show's eight years.

I always get a kick out of Rebecca Balding's appearance as Aunt Jackie in 'The Fourth Sister', knowing about her role as Elise later on in the series. Hurray for double casting!

Speaking of casting blunders; I wasn't a huge fan of the original version of Victor Halliwell (later re-named Bennett). Thankfully this incarnation is retconned further down the line.

Spells and Chants

Piper: "Don't tell me you spent the night in a conical hat flying around the neighbourhood on a broomstick."

Piper: "Don't put me in the middle." Prue: "I'm not, you were born in the middle."

Phoebe: "We're the Charmed Ones, Prue, not the Doomed Ones."

Prue: "Some of us have a job." Phoebe: "Some of us have fun." Piper: "And some of us are having a really bad hair day."

Grams: "What was the name of my husband?" Prue: "Which husband?"

Prue: "We do good things together, helps offset the bad things."

Best Episode: That '70s Episode.

Honorable Mentions: Something Wicca This Way Comes, The Wendigo, Is There a Woogy in the House?, Out of Sight, Deja Vu All Over Again.

Worst Episode: The Wedding From Hell.

With strong characterization at its heart, Charmed's debut season is a wonderful, if slightly uneven start to the Halliwells’ journey.

7 out of 10 Power of Three spells.

Panda

[tellegypsywanderer-blog]

A great end to one week and start to the next

Yestersay i woke up feeling grumpy and a bit off. I had a slow moving start to the day and puttered around for a few hours before getting my butt up and going.

I started the day off with a run around my neighbourhood. Definitely not in prime shape right now, and the run was painfully slow. I would say it was more of a walk with intervals of a bit of running mixed in. But thats okay. It got me out to explore my neighbourhood a bit more and some running is better than no running.

I decided to put on my big girl panties and go into town to get lost. First stop, to buy some water for my journey. Second, to walk down a street i am not familiar with. I found myself at a little restaurant, where i planned to study and lesson plan. But instead i met a local, Richard, who sat down and had lunch with me. What i took away from this conversation: Richard asked me “after your short time here in Tanzania, what do you think the people need most? How would you like to help”. Well this question threw me for a doozy. Mmm after a few minutes of thought. I said i hope to empower the women i am working with and to help to create a stronger sense of community and support. I got some good feedback. Which made me feel a bit better that my heart is in the right place.

After lunch i walked to the end of town, through the street markets, lined with fresh produce. I had to ditch a couple fly trappers (guys who follow you around trying to earn some extra money pretending that they have led you to a store). Eventually i got tired of being approached by the merchants and dipped down into the side streets where i could walk in peace.

I found a wonderful little garden where i did some journalling and had a fruit salad with ice creams, under a shady tree with a light breeze and music playing in the background.

I came back feeling refreshed and recharged after a perfect mixture of stimulation and relaxation.

My lesson planning went well, i have decided to use all the material provides in the binder, as well as supplement my teaching with what the women request for review/teaching. Then i can use this to add in dictations and correct the questions for review of previous lessons.

Also! My great solo adventure yesterday, seemed to have broken the ice a bit with K! She came out of her room today and asked what my plan was for the day. Today i am going to town with a local seamstress to pick out fabric so she can make me a dress 😊 i invited K to come along and she said yes!! Hurray 🎉

She even came and sat in the living room with me for a while. Things are looking up.

Todays lessons both went well. Some of it was boring. But really how can you make learning verbs, nouns and pronouns fun? Like come on.

I’m going to try and push group three to step outside their comfort zone and to support each other. And group one did amazing with their review. A successful day all around.

I’ll keep you posted about my dress.

Thanks for stopping by.

Xx Chantelle

[elcinelateleymickyandonie]

PAT O'BRIEN.

Filmography

1931 Honor Among Lovers

1931 The Front Page

1931 Staff Maid

1931 Flying High

1931 Consolation Marriage

1932 Hell's House

1932Scandal for Sale

1932 The Strange Case of Clara Deane

1932 Hollywood Speaks

1932 American Madness

1932 Virtue

1932 Air Mail

1933 Laughter in Hell

1933 Destination Unknown

1933 The World Gone Mad

1933 Bureau of Missing Persons

1933 Flaming Gold

1933 Bombshell

1933 College Coach

1934 I've Got Your Number

1934 Gambling Lady

1934 Twenty Million Sweethearts

1934 Here Comes the Navy

1934 The Personality Kid

1934 Flirtation Walk

1934 I Sell Anything

1935 Devil Dogs of the Air

1935 In Hot

1935 Oil for the Lamps of China

1935 The Irish in Us

1935 Page Miss Glory

1935 Stars Over Broadway

1936 Ceiling Zero

1936 I Married a Doctor

1936 Public Enemy's Wife

1936 China Clipper

1937 The Great O'Malley

1937 Slim

1937 San Quentin

1937 Back in Circulation

1937 Submarine D-1

1938 Women Are Like That

1938 Panamint's Bad Man

1938 Cowboy from Brooklyn

1938 Boy Meets Girl

1938 Garden of the Moon

1938 Angels with dirty faces

1939 Off the Record

1939 The Kid from Kokomo

1939 Indianapolis Speedway

1939 The Night of Nights

1940 Slightly Honorable

1940 Fighting 69th

1940 Castle on the Hudson

1948 Fighting Father Dunne

1948 The Boy with Green Hair

1949 A Dangerous Profession

1950 Johnny One-Eye

1950 The Fireball

1951 Criminal Lawyer

1951 The People Against O'Hara

1952 Okinawa (1952)

1954 Jubilee Trail

1954 Ring of Fear

1956 Inside Detroit

1957 Kill Me Tomorrow

1958 The Last Hurray

1959 Some Like It Hot

1965 Town Tamer

1975 The Phynx

1975 The Sky's the Limit

1977 Billy Jack Goes to Washington

1978 The End

1981 Ragtime.

Créditos: Tomado de Wikipedia

https://es.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pat_O%27Brien_(actor)

[sjworldtour]

21/11/19 Feeling the heat on Magnetic Island

On Tuesday morning we set off early and caught the 7am bus up to Townsville. Travelling another 5 hours north has put us in an even hotter, drier landscape, and we continue to be flabbergasted by the sheer scale and endlessness of Australia.

Arriving in Townsville, Sam went to forage for food (including our fave white choc and cranberry cookies) while joey babysat the bags. Despite joey tring her best to lose a ticket, we caught the ferry over to Magnetic Island. So called because when Cook first discovered it it appeared that compass needles would always point to the island, but that is in fact not true. We had a short but bimbly bus ride to our hostel, which spreads along Nelly Bay, chalet-like dorm rooms following a dry creek bed in a long arc. The rooms are fine and the pool is great but the kitchen is hopeless. We're starting to feel like we could design a really great hostel. Within minutes we splished into the pool to cool off, finally understanding why anyone would build a pool right next to the ocean - it's for when the ocean is full if things that want to kill you.

Early evening we walked along the 4wd track up towards West point, popping in to Cockle Bay which was beautiful and quiet although sadly we didn't see any crocodiles or koalas. Sam spotted a huge hunting bird though, possibly an eagle, and of course white cockatoos where everywhere being noisy.

We walked back to picnic bay and lay in the dusty sand for a few minutes, not quite getting up the energy to swim even though there's a stinger net. It's another pretty beach, with a picturesque painted white pier stretching out across the quiet water. Once the sun started dipping low over the mountains we hiked up a rocky trail to Hawkings point to watch the sunset. On the way we passed a kookaburra sat on someone's mailbox, so still that at first joey thought it was fake. It was a pleasant climb up the hill, obviously hot (everything is always hot) but with shady patches. The vegetation here is pretty scorched it almost looks autumnal, and there were loads of likely snake hiding places among the rocks and dusty yellow leaves. We luckily didn't see any, and emerged at the lookout to great views across Nelly Bay to the east and picnic bay, mainland Australia, and the rapidly setting sun to the west. There was a group of twenty-somethings loudly discussing their hostelling experiences (including judging our byron bay hostel for not being real (??)) And an entertaining family taking zillions of photos while squeaking at each other.

After the sun had gone we set off, turning down a side track we hoped would take us in the direction of home but ended up dwindling to almost nothing, and once Sam got a face full of spiders web we got a little bit freaked out. Luckily we made it down to a residential street without being eaten and made our way home safely from there. We chilled at the hostel in the evening and wandered down the beach to look at the stars before bed, Sam seeing a good shooting star.

Woke up early and caught a bus up to the Northern side of the island to get some walking in before it gets too insanely hot. Hiked up to an old WW2 fort with beautiful 300deg sea views and interesting signs about the fort's history. They talked about all the women gossiping after evening with attentive men, a man who stole and stockpiled grog, and the evening the Americans stole aussie women, Aussies stole American grog, and everything got nasty.

Wanting to head towards the bays to the north, we found a track down other side of the hill. It was signposted no people but we did it anyway naughty. Had to watch our steps carefully so as not to get a face full of spiders. The floor was ashy from fires (bush fires are rubbish for humans but weirdly essential for the ecosystem) and teeming with lizards, scrub fowl and the occasional wallaby. The trees were full of sticky sap ants nests and weird fat kapok fruits. Eventually we reached the main path and walked along a shady lane to Radical Bay. Very pretty beach fringed with frangipani trees but obvs can't swim because of death jellies so climbed on rocks. Very happy to have cold water in our bottles. From there we climbed up a giant hill, by now past 10am and the sun was punishing. Joey's face turned beetroot. Nearly died.

Eventually reached Horseshoe bay which had a shop selling cold water, some shade, and a stinger net hurray!! Got in the hot sea to try to cool down a bit then sat in shade to dry off. Brunch at artsy cafe with tasty milkshake. Wandered up the lane across a bridge promising crocodiles nearby (but didn't see any), then walked through a lush bananaey woodland swarming with butterflies. Spotted two enormous kookaburra, a rainbow lorikeet, hundreds of giant flying foxes (bats) sleeping in the gum trees, and a silk web spider.

We caught a bus back south towards Arcadia and Geoffrey bay, hired snorkels and stinger suits and had a wonderful hour and a half snorkelling on the reef. More corals and fish including two giant grumpy looking stripey fish, two sting rays, and six giant clams. There was a snorkel trail following bright yellow buoys, and the blue buoy at the end indicated a shipwreck, but the water was too deep and murky out there today so we couldn't find it. Sam gave joey a lesson in diving with snorkel stuff. A tiny bright yellow fish made friends with joey and followed her the whole way back from the main bit of the reef to the boat ramp at the side. We clambered out of our snorkel gear, careful not to burn our feet on the scorching concrete, then wandered around the bouldery headland which turns out to be the home of rock wallabies. It was far too hot for the wallabies to be out and about but we found a few sheltering in shady cracks, and one hopped enthusiastically over to sam by the car park, in the hope that he had something tasty on him.

We headed back to the hostel and chilled out for the afternoon, then joined in the hostel's trivia quiz, teaming up with two girls Phoebe and Hannah who, like us, were feeling all a bit too old and sober for the sillier of the games. Quiz was fun but infuriating as we never found out the answers to the questions, or how badly we did. 

On Thursday morning we strolled back over the hill to Picnic Bay, keeping our eyes peeled for koalas, and went for a pleasant early morning dip in the stinger net. There was a kookaburra posing on the beach. We had breakfast in a slightly fancier café than we would have chosen ideally, but it was great food. Trudged back to the hostel in the rapidly rising heat, checked out and chilled out until our bus to the ferry terminal. The bus was crazily full of faffing backpackers, and takes a very circuitous route, so Sam was fretting watching his fitbit as the ferry departure time drew closer. Luckily it actually left at 13:35 not 13:30 (which was why Joey wasn't panicking) so all was fine. We caught the ferry, caught our Greyhound (with a very weird checking in procedure, the driver calling each person on by name which took forever) and drove away through Townsville. The large novelty spiders on lampposts and the sides of buildings seemed to be pretty much the highlight of Townsville, and we didn't feel like we were missing out by not staying there. 

[culturedj]

Us women…we keep pushing forward, making art, and kicking ass.

A mix of some of the best female musicians working today told in 30 songs.

1. Liability-Lorde 2. Idle Worship-Paramore 3. Right Now-HAIM 4. Just Dancing-Sylvan Esso 5. Rican Beach-Hurray for the Riff Raff 6. Sparks Fly-Waxahatchee 7. Tummyache-Diet Cig 8. Capable-The Wild Reeds 9. Nighttime Hunger-The Overcoats 10. Nothing Feels Natural-Priests 11. It’s Time-Gracie and Rachel 12. Road Head-Japanese Breakfast 13. To the River-ALA.NI 14. Worship-Lizzo 15. Don’t Pass Me By- Laura Marling 16. Chopsticks on Pots and Pans-Allison Crutchfield 17. Mary-Big Thief 18. Percolator-Charly Bliss 19. Freedom (Interlude)-Noname 20. Edge of Town-Middle Kids 21. Smoke Signals-Phoebe Bridgers 22. 1080p-Sammus (feat. Jean Grae) 23. Time’s Been Reckless-Marika Hackman 24. Feel the Same-Bully 25. Hundred Ways-Joseph 26. Fatal Gift-Emily Haines and the Soft Skeleton 27. Dreams Tonite-Alvvays 28. Eastwick-Julia Jacklin 29. Lower Worlds-Rainer Maria 30. New York-St. Vincent